Kelly Clarkson

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[21] I've lost my mind.

[22] Conan O 'Brien, everyone.

[23] Hey, how are you?

[24] I don't know why I have a microphone.

[25] Why do they have me a microphone?

[26] This is the smallest room I've ever played.

[27] It feels more professional if you have mics.

[28] I swear to God, I've been in Frogerts shops that are larger than this.

[29] Hey, thanks for being here, by the way.

[30] This is really nice.

[31] Welcome to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend.

[32] Thank you, one guy, woo.

[33] Last time I was like, you know what, I feel like it's too small in here.

[34] Let's increase the capacity.

[35] Beyond the legal fire limit.

[36] Very dangerous.

[37] And they added, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

[38] They had like seven seats.

[39] But it's incredible.

[40] I think this is going to make the...

[41] I think these people are going to make the difference.

[42] Yes.

[43] Because you in the back.

[44] Look how entitled you are.

[45] We're sitting up on risers.

[46] They have to sit in regular plastic seats.

[47] I know some of you were shocked and horrified by how I look in person.

[48] How you doing?

[49] How are you?

[50] Have you been to one of these before?

[51] Oh, at Largo.

[52] You came to that show.

[53] The last show that I did The last one, it's the third one.

[54] Last one's like historic, you know?

[55] You're like, I was at Ford's Theater when Lincoln was shot a couple of weeks before.

[56] Was Lincoln there?

[57] No, but I drove a Lincoln there.

[58] You was there the last week.

[59] Right, you just wanted to make sure I was really leaving television for good.

[60] Patton Oswald was the guest.

[61] Very good.

[62] He's going to be a guest soon on Conan O 'Brien needs a friend.

[63] He's coming up.

[64] A lot of great, exciting people coming up on the show.

[65] Who's a regular listener?

[66] Anybody here regularly listen to the podcast?

[67] Oh, that's very nice.

[68] Okay, that's great.

[69] This is an audio format, so let me explain to the people listening right now.

[70] A lot of hands just went up.

[71] I wouldn't say every hand in the room, but a lot of hands.

[72] Thousands of hands.

[73] My favorite new thing that happens is I encounter people that have earbuds in.

[74] This happened to New York City, and it's happened walking around in L .A. I encounter people that are wearing earbuds, and they point at the, earbuds and say, I'm listening to you right now, which is really weird because then I feel like I'm interrupting myself, which is like a very strange feeling to have, but I ran into a woman in a Whole Foods who flagged me down and said, I'm listening to you right now.

[75] And I said, what do you think?

[76] And she went, eh.

[77] She didn't really, but I'm more comfortable with that kind of feeling.

[78] We got a great show today, very excited about our guest who's on the program.

[79] I think you all know who it is.

[80] Do they know who it is?

[81] Oh, they don't.

[82] Okay, it's a surprise.

[83] Well, Anyway, the last time I spoke to this guest was 20 years ago.

[84] So very excited.

[85] Yes, very, very excited to see this person.

[86] Last time I laid eyes on this guest was 20 years ago in person.

[87] So very happy to be seeing them again.

[88] You're all now thinking, is it Bob Dole?

[89] No, it's not Bob Dole.

[90] That's all I'll tell you.

[91] You can figure out just from the clue, not Bob Dole.

[92] It's like a really bad game of 20.

[93] questions.

[94] Is it not Bob Dole?

[95] All right, well, you know, I can't do this show without my, come on, I could.

[96] But, no, I really can't do it without my two close friends, my associates.

[97] They torment me, but I also love them dearly, and they're part of the magic of our show.

[98] So let's bring them out.

[99] Right now, I'm talking about Sona Mobscessian and Matt Gourle.

[100] I'm dancing.

[101] Should we have a little seat and chat about things for a second before we get started?

[102] Started?

[103] Yeah.

[104] Okay, wow.

[105] Man, I really had the energy whipped up into a frenzy.

[106] Come on, no dead air.

[107] We can do this.

[108] Okay.

[109] Listen, let me just say that you both look fantastic.

[110] Thank you for being here.

[111] We don't often do this.

[112] We don't often do the podcast with an audience, but I like it.

[113] I performed in front of audiences for almost 30 years, loved it.

[114] I feel I get a lot of energy from it.

[115] Sometimes I'm given cocaine after the show.

[116] I hope.

[117] From the audience?

[118] Oh, yeah.

[119] Oh, okay.

[120] What are you talking about?

[121] Yes, they would always bring me Coke.

[122] Oh, okay.

[123] Who's the Coke mule today?

[124] Trust me, always in the back.

[125] He's a lovely guy.

[126] Anyway, I'm really happy.

[127] I'm really happy that we have a crowd here.

[128] And Sona, tell us, how are you?

[129] How's your life going?

[130] Everything's good.

[131] Okay.

[132] Well, that's all the time we have.

[133] No, I have, there's really nothing.

[134] I wish there was.

[135] I wish there was some excitement.

[136] I mean, my friends keep telling me when they go out, and I don't go out like I used to.

[137] Oh, but you went out during, in your youth, and for maybe 10 years that we were working together, you tore it up.

[138] I mean, you went out every night and killed it.

[139] Yeah.

[140] And then slept mostly at work the next day.

[141] Yes, I did.

[142] Reeking of rum.

[143] And then, so you had your fun.

[144] You had your good time.

[145] I did.

[146] It's just weird that like now I don't.

[147] I don't do that anymore.

[148] Well, I think Matt Goreley does enough partying for all of us.

[149] That's pretty clear, right?

[150] No. You know, last time we did the podcast in front of this, in this room, in front of an audience like this, there was a woman who only came here to see you.

[151] Was it the one that I wasn't here or was here?

[152] You were not here.

[153] Yeah.

[154] Yeah.

[155] And you weren't here and she only came here to see you.

[156] And I said, of course, you probably, you know, I said no big deal.

[157] But Matt Goreley's not going to be here today thinking that it would, you know, not even be a speed bump in the world.

[158] road, this woman was heartbroken.

[159] Maybe she was here to kill me, though.

[160] I don't know.

[161] She did have a weapon.

[162] Didn't she yell out, Pasadena?

[163] Oh yeah.

[164] She did.

[165] I think that's her, right?

[166] I think I was here for that.

[167] Okay.

[168] No, no, you were not.

[169] You were not here.

[170] She was really disappointed.

[171] I hone in on a disappointed audience member.

[172] When someone's less than pleased with me, this comes from childhood.

[173] If someone's slightly less than pleased from me, my skin burns.

[174] Oh.

[175] And so I was quite aware that something was off with the crowd, and I found it.

[176] I talked to this woman.

[177] I don't know if she ever, and then it turns out she knows where you live.

[178] Not address -wise.

[179] She knew what street you were on.

[180] Really?

[181] Yeah, I told her.

[182] I told her exactly, and I said, there says there's an alarm system, but it's not real.

[183] They just got the sign.

[184] Oh, this is my new mistress.

[185] Yes.

[186] Oh, yes.

[187] Oh, she's great.

[188] That's how you met your mistress.

[189] Yes.

[190] She literally came in through the garage.

[191] Well, I hope you guys are You know, hope you're doing well As I said, you're important cogs in this machine Same jacket, we didn't even plan this They guys are cord bros Yeah, cord bros Two guys in corduroy Yeah, party Yep, nothing says an exciting night of fun Like two middle -aged white guys in corduroy Think of the noise we'd make if we hugged It's the strangest pickup line I've ever heard That's what my mistress said The minute she'd beat down the door I often say that Think of the noise we'd make if we hug I don't even remember how I used to try and start and chat with ladies back in the day When in my 20s Did you have a line?

[192] I didn't have a line.

[193] Well, I used to say I didn't know angels flew so low No, you wouldn't do that.

[194] Never did that.

[195] The audience was horrified.

[196] No, I never, ever, ever did anything like that.

[197] I usually say this skin will clear up.

[198] Oh, come on.

[199] Science is working on it.

[200] In 10 years.

[201] In 10 years we'll be a drug.

[202] And then you'll love me. That wasn't even your voice.

[203] You were just doing that voice?

[204] That was my voice then.

[205] I've had several operations since then.

[206] No, I didn't have good game.

[207] I didn't really have good game.

[208] Okay.

[209] Did you use any kind of first line with your wife, Liza, when you met her?

[210] Was there any, like, first quip or first?

[211] It's actually, I met Liza when I was shooting a remote in New York City, so it's all on, I mean, you would know better than I would because it was on camera.

[212] Right.

[213] I talked to her.

[214] I met an advertising agency and I was supposed to shoot a remote there and the cameras are rolling and I just start talking to this woman and very quickly, I'm not even trying to be funny.

[215] I'm not Conan O 'Brien saying.

[216] In love.

[217] Well, not yet.

[218] Oh.

[219] No, I'm kidding.

[220] I'm Conan O 'Brien just saying things like, no, no, that's really.

[221] cool and so your father oh okay i get it and she's then saying asking me questions i'm like no no i mean i studied english but then i also studied history and my producer was listening with you know headset on him what is what is wrong with him what's going on and uh so it's now out there our kids have watched us meet that's way back it's in 2000 we met in 2000 and so they've watched us meet and i don't want to watch it because i remember it and i know this sounds smaltzy but i know that that moment was special to me and I don't want to see it you know, in a digital format.

[222] Does that make sense?

[223] Yeah, I think so.

[224] Yeah, yeah.

[225] That's great.

[226] Does it make sense to you guys?

[227] Yeah.

[228] Do you think it's kind of sweet?

[229] Okay.

[230] What the hell is wrong with you people?

[231] Such a. Why can't you just pretend it's sweet?

[232] Isn't it sweet?

[233] I said isn't it sweet.

[234] It's sweet.

[235] It's sweet.

[236] I'm like, bullying them in.

[237] I bullied them into it.

[238] Isn't it kind of romantic?

[239] It's so sweet.

[240] All right, we've got to get going.

[241] Oh, okay.

[242] We got time.

[243] What?

[244] Don't you think so?

[245] I don't know.

[246] No, let's do it.

[247] This is exciting.

[248] I am excited.

[249] I haven't, last time I chatted with our guest today was 20 years ago.

[250] Wow.

[251] And she has gone on to such great things, done just fine without me. Some say better.

[252] Yeah, my guest today is a Grammy Award -winning singer, songwriter, whose 10th studio album, Chemistry, is out on June 23.

[253] She's also headlining a 10 -night Las Vegas residency beginning July 28th.

[254] I am thrilled, really thrilled.

[255] She's here today.

[256] She is such a mind -boggling talent.

[257] Kelly Clarkson, welcome.

[258] Hi, my name is Kelly Clarkson, and I feel honored and super cheesy because I love Conan about being Conan O 'Brien's friend.

[259] Well, that's very sweet.

[260] Thank you very much.

[261] That's very nice.

[262] And I will warn you, Kelly.

[263] Kelly, it's apparently not a very sentimental crowd tonight.

[264] Oh, that's right.

[265] I like humor above all.

[266] I tried to just bully them into saying something romantic about me. We won't make them cry.

[267] Yeah, exactly.

[268] Do it, do it.

[269] You know, I kept talking about this, but I was, I said, I know I've met Kelly, and it was right after you burst into the world's attention, American Idol.

[270] You came on my late night show, and I watched the clip of it this morning.

[271] I did too.

[272] And I was freaked out.

[273] Oh, not me winning.

[274] Me on your show.

[275] Sorry.

[276] Yeah.

[277] Oh, okay.

[278] Yeah.

[279] Yeah.

[280] No, no, I'm saying.

[281] I watched the clip of you coming on my show.

[282] Yes.

[283] Okay.

[284] Yeah.

[285] Okay.

[286] I only watch things that involve me. And they said, don't you want to see Kelly the night she won?

[287] I'm like, no, I'm not in it.

[288] Yeah, I went there.

[289] But they showed it to me. And the first thing it struck me is you are a kid.

[290] You're like a child.

[291] You come out.

[292] And then I'm an 11 -year -old girl in this clip.

[293] I mean, I am just such, I'm so young, too.

[294] And I'm like, hey, it's going close to anybody.

[295] Okay, so that's how I felt like my voice sounded.

[296] So we literally, I was telling him earlier, we Google it because I was like, I know it was like right after Idol and I was so excited like in love with him.

[297] Like I was like I was very excited.

[298] So what happened?

[299] I mean, why do, what?

[300] Why does the love fade so quickly?

[301] No, no, I mean, I mean just at that moment, I was like, I cannot believe I was so excited to get to do your show.

[302] So I was like, I just, it was a huge thing and I'd never done anything like that.

[303] The only thing I'd done is idle, really.

[304] So I was very excited.

[305] But we looked it up.

[306] I was like, I feel like it was like 2003 -ish, and we looked it up, and that was, so it's 20 years ago.

[307] Yeah.

[308] So we have a date in 20 years to have another interview.

[309] We are allowed to speak to each other once every 20 years.

[310] Once every 20 years.

[311] It's allowed.

[312] But no, but I had to turn it off because my voice was, you hate your own voice, like your talking voice.

[313] Like, I don't leave voicemails.

[314] I hate my talking voice.

[315] You don't, wait a minute.

[316] to a degree that you don't leave a voicemail?

[317] I never leave a voicemail.

[318] How do you feel about being on a podcast?

[319] Here's why I'm okay with this show and here's why I'm okay with my talk show or any show I do because I don't watch them or listen to myself back because I'm in it like you experience.

[320] We were just actually discussing this.

[321] I never watched myself.

[322] So for that reason alone, do you like your voice when you hear your voice?

[323] Nobody really does, right?

[324] I am not a fan of my voice.

[325] but then I talk to other people and they agree that they're also not a fan of my face.

[326] And I've always thought I do not have a good voice for television or radio and that's the medium that I got into.

[327] Which by the way, reminds me I have a major bone to pick with you which is I got into being a talk show host because that's the one thing I could do.

[328] You became a talk show host and you're really good at it and you have so many other incredible possibilities and you're an amazing singer, that enrages me. It just enrages me because that was all I could do.

[329] No one else was saying, you know, why don't you, do you also have like a 10 octave range?

[330] Yeah, but I think I'll just do a talk show.

[331] Hey, you were, like, I have been very vocal about this from the very beginning.

[332] Like, I was more shocked than anyone.

[333] Like, after doing the voice, they were like, oh, we like how you are in the show, your energy.

[334] Like, we think you'd do great at a talk show.

[335] You did it.

[336] We have this idea.

[337] And I was like, oh, thank you, no. Oh, you said no initially.

[338] twice because I was like I do not think that people will want I am not a comedian I am not a journalist I have no experience to do this like literally why would you want me to do this like and so they they really my ex actually really pushed me to do it he was like I think you'll be really good at it and I was like okay I was like and so I tried it and I will say from the pilot I think as long as you're a curious person and you love to engage with people you love to be communicative like it's it's it's kind of an easy job like it's like it's fun yeah i would i would say i can i sometimes think i can predict who's going to be good at it and when i heard that you were going to do a show my first instinct instinct was you're a very you're a very warm person and you're a very uh you seem like a real person and then i when i bumped into people that work with you regularly including the woman who did my makeup today who worked in the way yeah she was just saying she's the best.

[339] She's such a nice person.

[340] And I think that is, half of it is if you can be yourself in front of people and you're a legitimately good person, it's going to work out.

[341] And so you have proven me right.

[342] I mean, I think if you are yourself and you're comfortable, then it doesn't really matter.

[343] Like, because you don't know, because I didn't know.

[344] Like, people told me afterwards, like, wow, it was successful.

[345] Like, that never happens.

[346] And I was like, come again.

[347] And they were like, oh, this was probably going to fail.

[348] And I was like, what?

[349] Like, they didn't tell you that up front.

[350] I had no, like, ignorance was 100 % bliss.

[351] I had no idea that statistically I was screwed.

[352] Like, it was, like, I was probably going to fail.

[353] So I was like, if I had known that, maybe I would have said no a third time.

[354] No, the only way, what happens in show business is they'll kill you with enthusiasm.

[355] So what happens is everyone's like, it's going to be the best.

[356] You're going to be amazing.

[357] It's the perfect choice for you.

[358] Perfect time.

[359] And what they're really thinking is, I don't know.

[360] Yeah.

[361] If it goes badly, that's their problem.

[362] I'll just cash the check.

[363] And so you just, you know, but.

[364] Yeah, I'm glad I didn't know.

[365] Yeah.

[366] It's best not to know.

[367] Yeah.

[368] And you just enjoy it and you do it because you like doing it.

[369] Yeah.

[370] I'm curious because I want to go way back to your.

[371] I feel rude.

[372] I'm so sorry.

[373] Oh, no, no. I'm going to be an oscillating fan.

[374] I turn my back on them all the time.

[375] When I'm speaking to them in a room, it's not.

[376] not being recorded.

[377] I often have my back turned.

[378] This is the first time we've seen his face.

[379] Yeah.

[380] Yeah.

[381] And they're not pleased.

[382] I was really impressed that I always feel like people with incredible talent on some level know it.

[383] They know it subliminally.

[384] They just somehow know it.

[385] And I was looking back at your story and realized that you got these scholarships to these amazing college and Berkeley School of Music.

[386] Well, I think like right, like in in high school, it was, um, I, was informed because I was very poor that like a way for me to get to college would be a scholarship and they were like you sing well like if you wanted to go this route that you'd be able to have if you get to a certain point like if you chair like make a certain chair or whatever because it was like opera like I sing that kind of classical stuff so and I absolutely 100 % hated it.

[387] I love listening to it now but yeah when you're 16 and you want to sing I want to dance with somebody this is not yeah it just not the same thing.

[388] And who were you listening to at this point.

[389] You were like a huge Alenis Morissette fan.

[390] I'm a huge everything fan.

[391] Like Nirvana, like Whitney, Rosemary Clooney, like Reba Max.

[392] I love across the board just like music.

[393] I love Metallica.

[394] I love a lot of different things.

[395] So hence why I cover a lot of different styles of music.

[396] But it was just, it was told to me if I worked and I achieved a certain status that I could get scholarships, like rides, like because I couldn't afford it.

[397] There was no way I could afford that.

[398] So I did work my tail off.

[399] And I achieved that to where I could, it was like U .T or U .N .T. Berkeley was something I was very interested in as well.

[400] And to get into Berkeley School of Music on a, on a, on a ride, you know, to get a scholarship.

[401] That's a big deal.

[402] Well, it's a correction.

[403] I just, there's a correction there.

[404] It's, I didn't actually ever end up applying.

[405] I just had heard via my music program that like, once you achieve this, you could get that.

[406] So I didn't.

[407] I'm not impressed at all.

[408] Yeah.

[409] I'm sorry.

[410] No, I didn't actually.

[411] And I think your whole career has been a sham.

[412] I didn't.

[413] This podcast is over.

[414] No, I didn't actually ever apply because I ended up, I was working at like six flags over Texas, real story, doing the singing and dancing the shows there.

[415] And this girl randomly, yes, was crying and like her roommate bailed on her to move to L .A. And so instead of going to college, like a teacher's kid, my mom is a teacher instead of doing that route, I was like, you know what I'm going to do.

[416] I'm going to eat ramen noodle and sit on a mattress and sleep on a mattress in this random house in L .A. and just try and make it work.

[417] And you did odd jobs.

[418] I have litched, like, named something, and I've probably done it.

[419] Hit man. Still time.

[420] Still time.

[421] And don't think I haven't thought about it.

[422] I have a list.

[423] I'm sure you do.

[424] It all goes to shit.

[425] The apocalypse happens.

[426] Everyone in the record business has a list.

[427] Okay, so, but I heard that you were a rep for, like, Red Bull energy drinks.

[428] I was, yeah, I was a rep. Yeah, it was cool.

[429] You got paid, like, a good amount of money.

[430] It was, like, I feel like $12 an hour just to, like, drive around their truck with their gas money and go on like lakes and be like hey you want some free product and then you just get to hang with these people and then you make money that's literally my job I mean that's great to be cute and 20 right like I was in 20 I know if I did that now at my age yeah at 41 Hi kids I have treats and you'd be frowned upon yeah now I think when you're 18 it's a little easier they're like yeah you're cute go to that it was like a great job So you're working these different jobs, and I know that you were a waitress at like a comedy club.

[431] Uh -huh, hyenas.

[432] Okay.

[433] Do you remember like bad tippers?

[434] Do you ever channel those people in your mind and think, I am now one of the biggest stars in the world and which you could go back in time and tell that person who left you 35 cents?

[435] I was an idiot.

[436] Just like, look, when you're poor and like you literally have gone without electricity or like food, when someone tries to walk out on their bill, so I just remember this.

[437] and since it happened, they left and I chased these individuals, which are grown men, and I was like 18, and chased them out to the car, about to shut the door, put my boot in the door before I got on my God.

[438] I literally, I don't know what you can say on this show, but I said, motherfucker, you forgot something.

[439] I was like, I was like, because...

[440] You can say that on the show, and by the way, that's your next song time.

[441] Well, yeah, that's right.

[442] Oh, fucker, you've got something.

[443] That would have fit really well.

[444] You didn't count on me. That would have fit into this.

[445] But no, I...

[446] You're still trying to get into chemistry.

[447] But it's really dangerous.

[448] I shouldn't have done it.

[449] My boss was angry at me for doing it because he was like, you can get, like, it's a dark parking lot or whatever.

[450] And I was like, you would have made, they make you cover the ticket.

[451] If somebody does that to you, you have to cover it.

[452] I couldn't afford that.

[453] It was worth the risk of getting the shit beat out of me. No, that's, I mean, I completely understand in that period of your life, too.

[454] There's something about being...

[455] Even you have nothing.

[456] You are bold and brave.

[457] Right.

[458] It's that, what is it?

[459] Because what else do you have?

[460] You got nothing to lose.

[461] Yeah.

[462] So you go for it.

[463] But no, anyone listening, don't do that.

[464] You know what's funny to me is that...

[465] I know.

[466] What's interesting to me now is that, you know, American Idol and a bunch of these different singing shows like The Voice, they've become such a regular part of the fabric.

[467] I remember very clearly, and I was in New York and I was doing the late night show.

[468] and I remembered seeing an advertisement for this brand new show called American Idol and not knowing what it was and then hearing it's a singing competition show and like anyone else thinking, well, that'll be around for 10 minutes.

[469] For 10 minutes, like everything else.

[470] And I'm always wrong about things.

[471] So I, of course, it went on to be huge.

[472] But what's interesting is your perspective on it as the first person.

[473] I'm just curious to hear you talk about the beginning.

[474] the very beginning of American Idol, I know there was some stuff at the very beginning where it almost felt like these people don't really know what they're doing.

[475] Like this company doesn't know what they're doing because they're just figuring it out for the first time.

[476] Well, because there's truth to that because they had pop idol, which was in the UK.

[477] Will Young won the first one.

[478] And that was kind of the big thing.

[479] And it blew up there in the United Kingdom.

[480] And then Simon Fuller was not Cowell, Fuller was like, oh, I'm going to do this in America and see how it goes over.

[481] Well, they weren't sure.

[482] And so it blew up and they didn't really know how to control it.

[483] I don't know if you've noticed, but geographically speaking, America is enormous compared to the UK.

[484] So covering all that ground and like all the outlets and like all, I mean, we were literally someone was always sick with like walking or like laryngitis or just that we were overworked and not because they were mean about it.

[485] Everybody just didn't know.

[486] It was a phenomenon.

[487] It was just a phenomenon.

[488] So it just blew up and everybody was just trying to keep up with it, right?

[489] I heard, I don't know if it's true, that they so, this is the level they were at, they took you guys to a mall, the contestants to a mall.

[490] This is true.

[491] And I've heard this and it just sounds, I mean, now you know that they have a whole system because it's become part of the show business firmament and it's a big deal.

[492] We didn't have a stylist on the show until I think like the top five, maybe.

[493] Right.

[494] So you guys were just doing your own makeup and hair?

[495] They dropped us at a mall, the Beverly Center.

[496] And gave us, gave us money and said, And it was like, I don't, I think it was like 200 bucks.

[497] I don't even know how.

[498] It was just like a couple hundred dollars or something like that.

[499] And, and said, okay, go, go, you know, this is, you know, a prize to go get something like for, you know, the show.

[500] And I am thinking, the show's going nowhere.

[501] I'm pocketing this money.

[502] I will wear whatever I want.

[503] I just wore what I had.

[504] So what did you, so you didn't even spend the money they gave you?

[505] No, I didn't.

[506] I was like, this is like rent money.

[507] I was like, I'm not going to waste it on this dumb mall.

[508] Like, who cares about that?

[509] I didn't know.

[510] No one knew the show would be what it was.

[511] I'm literally the first winner.

[512] I had no idea.

[513] Like, no one knew.

[514] Even after I won, no one knew.

[515] No one could have called that, right?

[516] I do think the reason why so many successful people are from that particular show is because they're so invested.

[517] Simon Fuller, like with the record company, the management, the show.

[518] Like, if one succeeds, all the others succeed.

[519] So I think that's the brilliance behind that.

[520] And honestly, I had a wonderful time.

[521] Like, I love Simon Fuller.

[522] This never happens in the industry.

[523] But, like, he actually let me out of my deal.

[524] And he didn't have to.

[525] And I was, you know, successful.

[526] So there was no reason to do that.

[527] But he actually let me out because he couldn't actually be there.

[528] It was like other people running it.

[529] And it just wasn't a good...

[530] That's unheard of in any business, but specifically the music business for somebody to say, this is a superstar, a major talent.

[531] She wants out.

[532] You can go.

[533] I was an MTV.

[534] iced out performing and I was just in tears on the phone going look I I love you you're like the kindest person ever but like I don't work with you on the regular and I'm just unhappy with who I am working with he not only said he let me out he also said he'd help me find management and help me out like after like and with no with no ask like nothing no strings so it's I had a very positive experience in that sense right I will point out he sounds like a terrible businessman he's really loaded so he's doing something Right.

[535] Once I was like, my friends and I randomly like went like backpacking like, you know, in France.

[536] And he was like, literally this is a real story.

[537] He was like, oh, are you near?

[538] And I was like, oh my God, you're here too.

[539] And he was like, yeah.

[540] He was like, I'll send my tender for you.

[541] And I was like, I'm sorry, what?

[542] I was like, what is it?

[543] And this is before the app tender.

[544] This is a boat, I guess a tiny boat with a bigger boat that comes to get you.

[545] And I was like, I don't, I don't.

[546] A boat that contains another boat?

[547] It's a tiny boat, I guess, from one big yacht to, like, come get.

[548] And I was like, oh, man, we roll in different circles.

[549] Wait a minute.

[550] You don't have to send your tender.

[551] You're backpacking with your friends.

[552] And it's like, you're going to stay in a youth hostel.

[553] And then this guy's like, I'll send my yacht over.

[554] We were definitely staying at just like a normal hotel.

[555] Like, it was a husband.

[556] We were at a normal hotel.

[557] And I just was like, oh, my God, you're good.

[558] Like, that's not, I feel like a pretty woman.

[559] Like, you know, you walk in the store and you don't belong.

[560] So I was like, oh, this is not This is not how I roll So no, I'm good But I learned what a tender was Yeah And now it's something completely different That's true Yeah It's funny how words change I've had no experience With either Tinder Me neither It came along before my time So I never had to swipe or anything You never, yeah I just did that I don't think I would have done very well in that world Yeah I'm not even gonna venture Into there Oh come on let's give it a shot No You know You know, I want to talk about this album, Chemistry, because I've been listening to it.

[561] I listened to it last night, and my daughter is such a massive fan of yours, and she's 19, so I said they gave me this sneak listen to Kelly Clarkin's new album.

[562] And so she got in the car with me, and we drove around, listened to the whole album.

[563] And she, both of us blown away, but my daughter just going on and on about your range and the way you put a song across.

[564] And I think this is your 10th?

[565] Is this your 10th album?

[566] My tent.

[567] Someone told me that.

[568] Yeah.

[569] That's amazing.

[570] And I, someone told me that.

[571] Yeah, I'm going to be honest, you.

[572] I had no idea.

[573] I'm told I'm delightful.

[574] I am delightful.

[575] Not by anyone here.

[576] I hire a guy.

[577] But what's amazing to me is I don't, I know, I think I feel like I know great singing when I hear it.

[578] And I remembered watching your audition tape, which is out there.

[579] It's fascinating to see your audition for American Idol.

[580] Yeah.

[581] And it's fascinating to know which one you saw.

[582] Which, what do you mean?

[583] because they show, you know, they edit and they show you, I think they ended up releasing, but they had me actually sing another song.

[584] I came in singing at last.

[585] Yeah, that's the one I saw.

[586] Yeah, but then they actually ended up releasing at some point because people, they found out because they asked me, they're like, oh, that's how you sound a slow song.

[587] Can you sing like an up tempo?

[588] And like literally, every person was singing itchy, gitchie, yaya, whatever, the pink, the Lady Marmalade, every soul in the building was rehearsing that song to sing.

[589] So I was like, anything but that song.

[590] I was like, so I ended up singing Madonna, Express Yourself, for some odd reason.

[591] Because that's not like a. But it clearly went well.

[592] It went fine.

[593] But like I just, it's funny because how they edit the show, like nobody even saw that for years.

[594] Well, what's great is watching their reactions because it's, you know, you have the judges there.

[595] And it's Paul Abdul and they're just, they're, you starts, they're like, okay, go ahead.

[596] And you come in and you really do look like you've just come in from selling some Red Bull to people in a park.

[597] I literally probably did.

[598] And you start to sing at last and you just cut to them and it's really fun to see because it's, I don't know.

[599] It's like people seeing a UFO.

[600] They're just all looking at you.

[601] Their reactions are so priceless.

[602] They're seeing awesome talent come out of you, which is really cool.

[603] Well, so Randy and Paula were like that with me. But I had to win over the Brit.

[604] Like he didn't even remember me. He like, I came back and he literally said and like, I think I was seeing respect and it was on one of the lives or something.

[605] And he, I was like, oh, you can't hear.

[606] that enough.

[607] He was like, I don't even remember you.

[608] And I was like, thank you.

[609] That is so great.

[610] Well, it's funny.

[611] His job was kind of to be that way.

[612] And it's nice.

[613] I had also changed my hair color.

[614] So I think he just honestly did not recognize me or remember me at all.

[615] Was not impressed by my voice at first.

[616] And I think I've, no what are you talking about?

[617] You have, you have like this crazy operatic voice.

[618] I'm telling you.

[619] I, but I literally got off station.

[620] I was like, well, you can't hear that enough.

[621] It was like, I don't remember you.

[622] I was like, okay.

[623] Yeah.

[624] I'd I'd rather suck and be memorable than un -me - but not memorable.

[625] Well, he wears sweaters with no t -shirt underneath and that.

[626] No, he's like such a fan now.

[627] He's so nice.

[628] Oh, now he's come around.

[629] I have to win him over.

[630] Oh, that's, yeah, sure.

[631] No, I went him over on the show.

[632] I want him over on the show.

[633] But I think it took a minute.

[634] This album that you've done, chemistry, is about really personal stuff in your life.

[635] Yeah.

[636] Which is where a lot of great music comes from.

[637] Tragedy.

[638] Historically.

[639] But must be, I know that you wrote some of these songs, maybe a year and a half ago.

[640] Two and a half to three.

[641] I literally had to sit on it because my label loved the work, but I was like, I can't, I can't sit and do this.

[642] I'm not ready.

[643] Like, you know, I'm saying to talk about it.

[644] Like so I, and now I just needed to wait until, you know, we were through it and then I could do it.

[645] But so it's weird to listen to now.

[646] Do you feel like it's all, because you went through this traumatic, you know, separation, divorce, is that, is, and obviously I'm not a songwriter, I know anything about it, but is, but is, Is that at all therapeutic to write about it?

[647] It's only therapeutic.

[648] That's 100 % the reason why I did it.

[649] Like, I wrote so many songs, and I think, you know, we all process things differently.

[650] And for me, like, even when I was a kid, I had a, funny enough, I had a problem communicating.

[651] And really good at it now.

[652] But I had a problem with it.

[653] And my mom, like, shoved a, like, a journal in front of me. It was like, why don't you write?

[654] And so I started writing poetry.

[655] And I'd noticed that I, that's how I would process my feelings or what I was feeling.

[656] or I just didn't know sometimes because there's so many, it just feels chaotic sometimes of here.

[657] So then it turned into music.

[658] And so a lot of that was just me doing it selfishly.

[659] But then you realize like a lot of people unfortunately will relate to, I mean statistically, but shit, a ton of us relate to a divorce rate.

[660] So, you know, and just loss in general, grief in general.

[661] So I picked the ones that I felt weren't so literal and okay because we have children.

[662] So I picked the ones that were okay that I felt like.

[663] And then I put those out.

[664] Now, but the ones that are super literal.

[665] Those are for me. And they're probably just super specific.

[666] Super duper specific.

[667] Right.

[668] On August 5th.

[669] It's a lot of anger, yeah.

[670] Just a lot of anger.

[671] I think a couple of the angry songs made it, but they weren't the ones that were like, you know, no, code red.

[672] Divorce in general is hard, separation, grief, loss, all of that is hard.

[673] I think the worst part, though, is when you feel alone.

[674] Like, I don't even hang out with anybody that's really, like, my main group of friends, like aren't married, don't have children, aren't in the public eye.

[675] Like, none of the things that tick the boxes that I am.

[676] So, which is awesome.

[677] That's why we make a fun group.

[678] But at the same time, when you're going through something so horrendous and so publicly, there's no way to, like, describe that.

[679] Like, there's, I just saw your shirt.

[680] I'm sorry, that's amazing.

[681] I caught my eye.

[682] That's amazing.

[683] But there's no way.

[684] Thank you.

[685] It's a cone in shirt and they're very sexy.

[686] I love it.

[687] It's amazing.

[688] I'm very sick.

[689] I'm so ADHD, like squirrel.

[690] Sorry.

[691] But I think I think when you're that, when you're that isolated and I think everybody relate COVID, right?

[692] People are so isolated.

[693] Like I think that's the worst to not feel like you can connect with another being and like heal.

[694] in that sense.

[695] And I think that that's why we all do crave.

[696] Like, maybe it's not marriage or maybe it's not whatever society tells you, but we do crave companionship.

[697] And because you need, you need to connect and you need to, it's almost a process of healing, I think, for me. Do you, what do you, do you have an instrument that you use, a musical instrument when you, when you were trying to work something out?

[698] Do you use a guitar?

[699] I am a horrible guitarist.

[700] And I, like, literally, I played one tour, and then I found out, like, halfway through, they were, like, not putting it in there.

[701] I was like And they I found out they were like Not putting it in the mix And they were like Well we just knew you know you're learning So like and I was like I killed that solo Yeah no one heard it And I was like I felt it And I was like okay I'm gonna let the professionals do it So I know chords like enough to like Right if I need to on a guitar piano But honestly most things Especially this record Most of it was Acapella just lyrics and melody flowing out of me and then we worked a track around it um and sometimes i call like i i literally sent out like a like a code red like any any artist friends that i knew that were producers or writers i was like please send me anything you have that's like even if it's like it's a random guitar riff idea or just anything that because i i was needing to get all of this out and i just needed different moods and different like perspectives musically so um so i wrote like that too but it's the lyrics and melody or me I love that you worked with, and I did not see this coming, but one of my all -time idols is Steve Martin.

[702] I've just absolutely adored Steve Martin.

[703] I can't believe he said yes.

[704] And he had a huge impact on my comedy and my life.

[705] And then I find out that, I mean, I always knew he's an amazing, amazing banjo player.

[706] Yeah.

[707] And I hear about this collaboration that you did with Steve Martin, which.

[708] You would have never, what?

[709] That doesn't even make sense.

[710] But it sounds great.

[711] And the song is.

[712] So the song is I hate love.

[713] And in the song, so I wrote, I, sure.

[714] How do you say on these days?

[715] It was a really sunny day.

[716] No, and why I hate love is not that I hate love.

[717] It's that you hate what love can do.

[718] And especially so in the second verse, you know, you watch the notebook, right?

[719] And you're like, oh, that's so beautiful, James Garner crying.

[720] Like all the things, you're like, I could, this is achievable.

[721] And then you see reality in like a movie like it's complicated with like Meryl Streep, Steve Martin, Alec Baldwin.

[722] It's one of my favorite movies.

[723] And that's more real life.

[724] And so I just thought it was funny to play off of those.

[725] I'm very much inspired by art, like whether it's music or movies or art or whatever.

[726] And so I played off that.

[727] And then the lyric, it's like I'll take Steve Martin over Gosling.

[728] Like I basically like throwing Ryan Gosling.

[729] I love Ryan Gosling.

[730] But I was making a joke.

[731] I dated him for a while.

[732] Was it good for you?

[733] No, it's really...

[734] I know, it's not the notebook, isn't it?

[735] Underwhelming lover.

[736] So, no, so anyway, I made this reference of Steve Martin in it and that I would choose Steve Martin over Gosling.

[737] And I literally looked at Jesse Shagga, my producer.

[738] I was like, do you think, because I know he's a badass musician, I was like, do you think in some world he would agree to play on this?

[739] Because it's kind of a pop punk song.

[740] And banjo, I thought, would be cool on it.

[741] And so, and it is.

[742] And it is.

[743] And so anyway, he said, yes.

[744] I know.

[745] And I didn't get to go to the studio with him.

[746] I'm so, I still never met him.

[747] Jesse got to.

[748] I was working.

[749] It's so funny, you brought up the notebook, and I just have to relate that Ryan Reynolds was on the show.

[750] Do you remember this?

[751] Ryan Reynolds was on the show once.

[752] It's burned into my memory forever.

[753] So Ryan Reynolds was on our show, and he had this ID said, let's recreate this scene from the notebook.

[754] So I'm wearing the blue dress in the rain.

[755] Yeah.

[756] With the, they're yelling at each other?

[757] And they're yelling at each other in the rain.

[758] You came back for me?

[759] Yeah.

[760] And Ryan Reynolds is doing Ryan Gosling.

[761] And it culminates with the two of us.

[762] And it was shot in this, like, beautiful filmic style to exactly match the movie.

[763] Oh, my gosh.

[764] And I am, what's the actresses?

[765] You're Rachel McAdams.

[766] I'm Rachel McAdams.

[767] And my hair is just matted down and I'm wearing the same dress.

[768] How is your ugly cry?

[769] Oh, it was fantastic.

[770] It was really ugly.

[771] And, but it ends with Ryan Reynolds and I had just agreed that, We were gonna rush each other and start making out.

[772] So we do, we start making out, and we're making out for what?

[773] It felt like four hours, but it was maybe just like a minute.

[774] You can see it on the internet, but Ryan - You're giving it the old college try.

[775] No, no, I just go for it.

[776] And Ryan Reynolds at one point has this mover.

[777] He's reaching over and he's doing, he's kind of twiddling my ear.

[778] Oh, my God.

[779] And so we just both went.

[780] That's one of his moves.

[781] Yeah, exactly.

[782] So I learned a lot about him.

[783] And myself.

[784] Yeah, exactly.

[785] And so we done, cut, we got it.

[786] And I'm just like, all right, what's next?

[787] And I move on.

[788] And my wife had watched the whole thing happen.

[789] She saw it on TV that night.

[790] She watched it.

[791] And she said, yeah, that ruined both of you for me. Like collectively at the same time.

[792] I'm no longer like, I don't like you.

[793] I don't like.

[794] I'm unattracted to both of you.

[795] I like, yeah.

[796] And I now find you both horrific.

[797] I think that's amazing.

[798] Well, it's a good experience.

[799] It's amazing how long it lasted.

[800] Oh, yeah.

[801] All right.

[802] You know, just go for it.

[803] When you know that's coming, do you use a mint?

[804] Do you put a mint in your mouth?

[805] I actually, just to get him, had a burrito.

[806] I had a very rare garlic burrito, all garlic.

[807] Because what did I care?

[808] Do you guys still talk at all?

[809] Do you still kiss?

[810] Let's just say we text a lot I was leave it alone That kind of relationship It is funny how I love people that go for the joke That's the beauty of comics That's why I loved actually being a cuckto -witius In a comedy club I love to put your pride or everything aside ego And just be like hell why not Like I love that There's nothing more attractive Why are you saying we put our pride aside Well no I mean I know exactly Some people have pride that they have to put aside.

[811] And I know a lot of...

[812] What's this pride thing?

[813] I know a lot of straight dudes would be like, no, no, I don't want people to think.

[814] And it's like, okay, guy.

[815] Nobody's thinking about you that much anyway.

[816] But like, it's like...

[817] I love that people...

[818] I think that it's the most unattractive thing.

[819] I'm sorry, about a person to be so comfortable.

[820] I imagine, I'm always trying to look forward what's the connection between different artistic forms.

[821] And what I do know is...

[822] And I know that it applies to what you do in music.

[823] music is, and also on your talk show, when it's time to go, you just go.

[824] You know, you look at all the different things that you've been through in your life and in this recent, in your personal life recently.

[825] And people might say, well, how do you keep going?

[826] It's because you take it moment to moment to moment.

[827] I'm going to take this and I'm going to write this song.

[828] Then I'm going to write that song.

[829] I'm going to move to this moment, then to that moment.

[830] Well, that's interesting you said that because that's literally, I think everybody had a hard time during COVID.

[831] I, I, I, I, they tried to keep our show going and well we did um but like from my ranch and montana which had very poor internet and like could not be a more remote location in the mountains and i'm traipsing through snow my marriage is falling apart no one knows i'm just learning all these songs i'm doing this other stuff for music thing like it's like just shit is hitting the fan and and and and and all the while you know you're like what's up america and you're not you're not know, you're smiling and you're, you're, I think, I think a lot of us have to do that, whatever vocation you choose, like, whatever your job is, like, I think a lot of us have have to do that sometimes.

[832] But what I found helpful is, I would be like, like, truth, like completely bawling, like right before we would be shooting and be like, how do I fix this?

[833] Like, you know, and then we'd start and we'd, like, let's say cover like an H .I. story.

[834] And some amazing human would come on the screen and just say how they went from something maybe tragic and did something that usually maybe people would find cheesy or something, but it's so healing.

[835] And I think when you step outside yourself and not necessarily compartmentalize it, but just let it go for a moment because it seems so huge.

[836] And then you focus on someone else, it kind of changes the perspective on everything in your life.

[837] Of course.

[838] Yeah.

[839] It's healing in a sense.

[840] But it's hard to keep smiling.

[841] Right.

[842] There was one time when I was like, I never cancel.

[843] I'm like, I'm not that person.

[844] And I was like, I can't actually fix this.

[845] I looked like, oh, God, put her in a jacket.

[846] Like, I was like, it was real bad.

[847] And I was really sad.

[848] And so we had to, like, cancel one day.

[849] And I know that's so rare for you because I've actually seen footage of you at some award show and you're performing your ass off.

[850] And I know that I later heard the backstory, which is that you needed to have an appendectomy.

[851] Didn't they like, and they like the doctors.

[852] Awards are like the death for me. You don't understand.

[853] Like, that happened.

[854] Yes.

[855] Like, my appendix was about to burst.

[856] I literally went into surgery hours later.

[857] something else happened the other time I was doing it my first performance ever on the Grammys this is a real story I was called right as I was leaving for the Grammys being picked up by my publicist at the time Roger Winnowski and was told I had cancerous results and I was like and cancer like runs in our family like ovarian cervical like just the gamut breasts everything and I was like what and and the whole day was ruined because I just couldn't stop crying because I was like wait I haven't done so much like in my life I was like And it just was the worst day ever.

[858] True story.

[859] The next morning, I called back to schedule because I was like, I can't.

[860] They're like, we need you to come in now.

[861] I was like, well, I'm going to be performing on the Grammys.

[862] So, and it was like a huge moment for any kid that grows up watching.

[863] That's like the epic thing for you.

[864] And literally called the next morning for like what I needed to do next.

[865] And they were like, oh, we're so sorry.

[866] Those were actually someone else's results.

[867] No. No. And I was like, you?

[868] first of all my first thought was like who did you tell they were fine right and now you're calling them and telling them they have cancer like I'm like wait what and and and and and then they call Clark Kellison and then I was like I know and then we're so sorry Clark but I'm just telling you award shows get ruined for me they're like like sometimes I don't want to go because I'm like what the hell is going to happen to me like because something always happens I feel like and and I won that night oh my God and then I won.

[869] again, and then I just kept crying because I was like, God's giving me this before he takes me. Oh!

[870] Sorry.

[871] I'm sorry.

[872] I had to have my makeup.

[873] Thank you, God, for this one last.

[874] I was kidding.

[875] I get to live.

[876] Everyone was like, oh my gosh, your performance because it's an emotional song in general.

[877] They were like, it was so beautiful.

[878] And I was like, that's because I thought I was dying.

[879] And I was like so worried.

[880] And they had to redo my makeup three times.

[881] I'm like, you people ruined an entire moment to like for me. And I just, yeah, award shows in general, like, shit always happens to me. I don't know.

[882] I'm always afraid to say yes, like, because who knows what's going to happen?

[883] My favorite, my award show moment was I was working, well, there was a bunch of crazy things that have happened, but I was working on an award show once and emceeing it and had to do kind of like a song and dance number.

[884] And I can sort of like hold a tune, if necessary, in a comedic way.

[885] So it was all fine.

[886] But then it was important that I hit this note at the end.

[887] Yeah.

[888] And so they said, you know about this, but they said, what we're going to do is we're going to get you into the Capitol Records building.

[889] There's the orchestra is there that's going to be.

[890] Did you do it while they were playing?

[891] And yeah, it was the greatest thing in the way.

[892] And what they did is they had me hit this sing it there.

[893] So they had it on this track.

[894] Yeah.

[895] But then they had me hit this one note.

[896] So I was going to sing it live.

[897] But then at the end goes, so welcome to the, you know, I got to hit this note up there and hold it, which I don't do.

[898] It's been piece of cake for you, but I don't do that.

[899] so they auto tuned it and then they did this thing where they extend it for a long time so it looks like I'm really holding the note and they said so Conan just get to that part and then get to there and then go and get down on one knee and mime it and we'll we'll slide it across and it'll look like you hit it okay so I do the whole bid I do all the jokes then I go into the song then I hit the note and the crowd you know was really liked it and they're like yeah and I walk off stage and barry manelow is standing there and he's looking at me and he says hey man you hit that note and held it.

[900] And I said Autotune pre -recorded.

[901] He went Oh, and walked away.

[902] Like I had farted, you know.

[903] He was so impressed and then rejected it.

[904] He went from, wow, that was, and then his face fell like he'd had a stroke.

[905] And he just turned and walked away.

[906] I'm like, yeah.

[907] He was just like, oh, you sicken me. Yeah, it was a fun moment for me. Oh, my God.

[908] Artists do that.

[909] Hey, give me a favor.

[910] Will you not have 20 years ago by before we talk again.

[911] I know, I would love to, and you know what?

[912] One of the reason I got to come visit you is because you're moving your show to New York.

[913] You're going to be in my old studio where we did late night from 93 to 2009.

[914] So for 16 years, I was in that place.

[915] That place is near and dear to my heart.

[916] That's where I met you.

[917] That's where we met.

[918] I know.

[919] And you said, I'll see you in 20 years.

[920] And I couldn't believe it in 20 years.

[921] I was like, geez.

[922] You said, I'll see you in 10 albums, sucker.

[923] But, yeah, Letterman was in that studio before me, and he did his iconic show there.

[924] There's a lot of...

[925] They told me the history of it.

[926] Yeah, Tom Snyder was there, interviewed John Lennon in that room.

[927] That is a very famous studio that has magical mojo.

[928] So I'm really happy that you're going in there.

[929] It makes me happy.

[930] Oh, I am too.

[931] I'm really happy, too.

[932] Well, the album chemistry will...

[933] I think when this drops, it doesn't drop.

[934] It drops June 23rd.

[935] No, I'm saying the podcast.

[936] I'm so confused about what to say.

[937] It kind of falls with a bit of a thud.

[938] Yeah.

[939] It tumbles out.

[940] It gets released.

[941] It's cool.

[942] By the time this, well, don't tell me it's cool.

[943] Because then it's not.

[944] Because then it's not.

[945] Thank you.

[946] Oh my God.

[947] Wait, can I say something real quick?

[948] Do you?

[949] I just found this out in a podcast yesterday.

[950] Do you all know, look, I'm going to sound like an idiot.

[951] Do you know, like, do you know before anyone answers what Netflix and Chill is?

[952] Like, do you know what that is?

[953] Yeah, I do.

[954] What do you think it is?

[955] Well, I think it's, let's get it on, as the kids used to say.

[956] You didn't know that?

[957] Did y 'all know that?

[958] Yeah, it's like a, it's like a way of saying, let's do it.

[959] Yeah.

[960] My friend was like, yeah, that's like getting a text like, you up.

[961] And I was like, wait, what?

[962] I have been saying, I'm more of a Netflix and Chill Girl.

[963] Like, I don't know, no, no, Kelly, that means no. It doesn't mean what you think.

[964] I, oh, I am aware as of like 12 hours ago.

[965] But I didn't know.

[966] I'm like, oh, my God, I have been saying, like, oh, I'm like a Netflix and Chill person.

[967] Like, I just thought it meant it.

[968] Yeah, it's kind of like a, it's almost like a booty call thing to say.

[969] Like, let's just watch Netflix and Chill is code for, yeah, it'll be on in the background.

[970] My other one.

[971] I had no idea.

[972] And I have been out here for like a minute going, I know, I'm like, low key.

[973] I'm like Netflix and Chill kind of girl.

[974] And they're all like, hi, girl.

[975] I'm kind of a Hulu and screw guy.

[976] Oh.

[977] I've got to be honest to you.

[978] I'd be down for either, but, like, I just, I'm up for the occasion, but, like, I just didn't know.

[979] I'm just a peacock and just a peacock.

[980] Yeah.

[981] It kind of sets itself up at least so bad.

[982] Well, Kelly, I hope I see you again soon.

[983] You are, well, you're everything you were when I met you 20 years ago.

[984] You're just still incredibly talented.

[985] Obviously, that doesn't go away, but you're a very warm, real person.

[986] and you're funny and you're still yourself.

[987] You're still the person that ran down the street after those people that ran out on the tab.

[988] And so I know you've been through a lot, but I know better times are coming.

[989] And I'm happy for you.

[990] Man, they're already here.

[991] Very good.

[992] Kelly Clarkson, everybody.

[993] Thank you.

[994] It was with Glenn and a lovely person.

[995] Isn't she?

[996] She's lovely.

[997] Wait a minute.

[998] What the hell is all that about?

[999] There are really good audiences out there.

[1000] I'm stuck with you people.

[1001] Wow.

[1002] They don't do that when I walk down the hall.

[1003] No. They hide.

[1004] You're not Kelly Clarkson.

[1005] No. I'm sorry.

[1006] I'm Clark Kellysen.

[1007] I have some bad news for you.

[1008] Hello, Clark Kellysen here.

[1009] You told me my results were fine.

[1010] What?

[1011] Fuck.

[1012] Listen, it's time to get down to some business.

[1013] Oh, we're going to get down to some business?

[1014] Are we?

[1015] What kind of business?

[1016] We gotta sell some products.

[1017] Hey, you know what?

[1018] Not we gotta, we get to.

[1019] You're right, boss.

[1020] We get to.

[1021] You know what I like, Sona, don't you?

[1022] I want to say you like cell phones.

[1023] No. Oh.

[1024] I like good.

[1025] That's too, that's too vague.

[1026] I'm going to be more specific because you've been drinking.

[1027] I like good, reliable coverage.

[1028] There you go.

[1029] And I like, thanks a lot.

[1030] You're a big help here.

[1031] It is possible with T -Mobile.

[1032] Now, Blay, you are a loyal T -Mobile fellow.

[1033] Tell us about your experiences.

[1034] For many years, yeah.

[1035] I actually use T -Mobile.

[1036] I live -stream my hikes.

[1037] I like to live -stream my...

[1038] This is actually true.

[1039] No, no, no, no one doubted that it was true.

[1040] Everyone believed you.

[1041] There was a sadness about it.

[1042] Everyone believed it.

[1043] But it's great.

[1044] I like to go connect with nature and live -stream it.

[1045] It's fun.

[1046] I go, I have this great two -hour loop I do, and I bring people along.

[1047] Sorry, did you say great?

[1048] Yeah.

[1049] Okay.

[1050] Yeah.

[1051] And we play games like, what's this tree?

[1052] And we rate dogs and stuff that I see on my hike.

[1053] And I also, I, there's a lot of big houses around where I live.

[1054] I live in an apartment.

[1055] But we try to guess how much each one of those houses cost.

[1056] What a clipping live stream.

[1057] And it's, it's really fun and fantastic.

[1058] Very good.

[1059] With T -Mobile, I get great service.

[1060] You get that 5G coverage, right?

[1061] Five -G is the good one.

[1062] Yeah.

[1063] What other Gs are you familiar with?

[1064] There's the four, the three, and the two, right?

[1065] Blay, the use of your time worries me. But I think the message we should take away from it is that T -Mobile covers more highway miles with 5G than anyone else.

[1066] Did you know that?

[1067] No, I didn't.

[1068] Yeah.

[1069] So if you need great coverage, especially when you're on the go, and talk about on -the -go, this is what Thoreau intended when he said, go take a walk in the woods, was to live -stream it.

[1070] It makes me feel like I'm in the legend of Zelda.

[1071] Exactly.

[1072] Okay, well, it's going from sad to sadder.

[1073] Anyway, I'm 95 years old.

[1074] You want to Netflix and chill?

[1075] No, if you need great coverage, especially we're on the go.

[1076] Check out T -Mobile.

[1077] They're the largest and fastest 5G network.

[1078] Experience America's largest and fastest 5G network for yourself.

[1079] Find out more at T -Mobile .com slash C -Y.

[1080] That's T -Mobile .com slash S -E -E -W -H -Y.

[1081] That's right.

[1082] I spelled it out.

[1083] Fast is based on media and overall combined 5G speeds according to analysis by Ucla of speed test intelligence data for Q1 2023.

[1084] See 5G device coverage and access details at T -Mobile .com.

[1085] Let's bring out someone very special to us, shall we?

[1086] Who would that be?

[1087] It's your assistant, David Hopping.

[1088] Oh, my other assistant, because Sona is usually busy.

[1089] Oh.

[1090] And so I have David Hopping, David Hopping.

[1091] David, a quick question.

[1092] Did you get to meet Kelly Clarkson?

[1093] I did.

[1094] You did?

[1095] I did.

[1096] Okay, we were driving today together and we're listening to Kelly's new album, Chemistry.

[1097] At one point, we finished like the third or fourth song.

[1098] And I said, oh, that song is really good.

[1099] And you looked at me and said, it's impossible for Kelly to have a bad song.

[1100] It's true.

[1101] It's true.

[1102] I know, but you are such a fanatic.

[1103] It must have been nice to meet her.

[1104] That is.

[1105] I brought a vinyl.

[1106] She signed it for me. I didn't ask you if I could do that because I didn't want to risk you saying no so I just brought it.

[1107] Well, now I look like a controlling asshole to everybody.

[1108] I thought you well.

[1109] So the answer is I would like it and I will shred it in front of you.

[1110] No, I would have said yes.

[1111] So you really were afraid to ask me if you could bring a line?

[1112] No, I actually wasn't.

[1113] You just forgot.

[1114] Yeah, I just forgot.

[1115] It's easier to say I'm afraid than I forgot.

[1116] Okay.

[1117] I'm glad you met her.

[1118] Isn't she nice?

[1119] She is really nice.

[1120] Thank you.

[1121] Yeah.

[1122] Please.

[1123] You let it have.

[1124] You made a hat.

[1125] happened he told me yesterday he was like you're going to get one on one time and then i wasn't sure if it was a bit or if it was true and it was true why do you and sona always think that my acts of kindness are a cruel joke they are what we ever think that he said something nice earlier and i started getting super defensive yeah yeah whatever i tried to be nice i promised you one on time one on one time with uh kelly clarkson and um i half meant it but no i know i knew i knew that i be able to swing it.

[1126] Oh, thank you.

[1127] And she's so nice.

[1128] She's not one of those people that's going to say, no, I'm out of here.

[1129] I've performed what I needed to do.

[1130] No, I'm gone.

[1131] She's just a lovely person.

[1132] Where is she now?

[1133] She's gone.

[1134] I think she's working the hallway because they gave her such a great reception when she walked out.

[1135] So how can we help you, David?

[1136] I think you're going to take some questions from.

[1137] I have no idea what's happening.

[1138] I don't know why you.

[1139] If anyone has a question for Conan?

[1140] I honestly thought you were bringing me my lunch.

[1141] If anyone has a question, raise your hand?

[1142] So when's your new HBO Mac show started?

[1143] Oh, thank you for asking.

[1144] We, I shot this show, as you know, we do this podcast, and then we talked to famous folk like Kelly Clarkson, but then usually in the middle of the week, I talk to anyone in the world who just wants to talk to me. And so the idea was many of these conversations, as you guys know, because you're there, end with them saying, well, Conan, if you're ever in Nigeria, hop on, stop on by.

[1145] And they say it kind of like a joke.

[1146] So what we decided to do is a show that HBO Max said they wanted to do.

[1147] where I talk to them, you see a minute or two clip of that, and then I show up at their door, and I get involved in their life, the Conan remote style where I'm literally going through their kitchen and tearing open their closets and then trying to help them achieve what it is they wanted to achieve or work out a problem they have with their mom, which is an episode that we shot in Bangkok.

[1148] And so we shot some of them, and then the writer's strike came, and so we shut everything down.

[1149] And so until the Writers Guild is satisfied and they get a good, because I started out as a TV writer, and so I'm backing them a thousand percent until they get what they want.

[1150] We, the show will sort of stay in limbo.

[1151] And then whenever that gets resolved, we can, I hope, finish it up.

[1152] All of us right now in this business are just waiting to see what's going to happen.

[1153] But there is a trailer that's out there that people can check out if they want.

[1154] Yeah, it's called Conan O 'Brien Must Go.

[1155] Yeah.

[1156] Never a true statement.

[1157] I know, I know, trust me. People do like a title that shits on me. But, yeah, so that should be coming along at some point.

[1158] This time is, what you're hearing is David walking.

[1159] Hi.

[1160] Have you spoken to Jordan and how is he?

[1161] Well, it's so funny because wherever I go, people want to know how Jordan's doing.

[1162] No, actually what they want to know is why isn't Jordan with you right now?

[1163] And I always say because I want to enjoy my life.

[1164] Jordan is, and this is true.

[1165] What's amazing about Jordan Slansky is people do these deep dives on the Jordan Schlansky remotes and the adventures that we've had together.

[1166] And they see that I get irritated with him.

[1167] And a lot of people think, well, it's got to be an act.

[1168] And you'll back me up on this sona.

[1169] Yeah.

[1170] It's not an act.

[1171] He is a very irritating fellow.

[1172] I wish it was an act.

[1173] Yeah.

[1174] It's not.

[1175] Yeah.

[1176] And he was for years at our show, driving people up the wall with his long, pompous explanations of how to make the best latte.

[1177] And then we just realized that when I talk to this guy, it's kind of magical.

[1178] And then we've had all these adventures together over the years, and everyone wants more.

[1179] They want more Jordan Slansky.

[1180] But I'm constantly bumping into people who said, my family and I just did like four hours of you and Jordan.

[1181] and I think why?

[1182] Why would you watch me and this very irritating man drive each other insane?

[1183] But it is pure.

[1184] And I do try to explain that to people.

[1185] Yeah.

[1186] I think that's why it works.

[1187] I don't think you could make up a person like Jordan Slansky.

[1188] No. You recently launched a channel on Samsung TV and he went to New York and just handed ice cream out to people.

[1189] Yeah.

[1190] And just drove around New York just handing out ice cream.

[1191] Yeah.

[1192] And I think it was very popular.

[1193] popular yes it was uh people really liked it it's um i don't understand he's been asked because he has fans like the band rush really liked jordan and jordan likes rush so they they asked jordan to come out and like open their show by just appearing and waving um i'm scared how many common interest jordan and i have oh you're a big rush fan i do love rush okay wow wow that was what it sounded judgy like you're like oh you like rush okay not at all okay getty lee he's great you can't just just say someone's name in the band to prove you like the band.

[1194] Anywho.

[1195] No, no, they're great.

[1196] They're in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

[1197] Anywho, Jordan, that's the important thing.

[1198] And he's not Rush.

[1199] And he's out there and there'll be more Jordan.

[1200] And he will reemerge right now.

[1201] Things have just gotten a little quiet with this writer's strike and they'll remain that way until it gets resolved.

[1202] Any other questions?

[1203] Yes.

[1204] Hi, Conan.

[1205] Hello, Matt.

[1206] Hi.

[1207] Will there be a chill chums season two?

[1208] Well, first of all, I want to thank Dave Grohl for being here.

[1209] Oh, my gosh.

[1210] I always think of the same thing.

[1211] I get it all the time.

[1212] It is absolutely amazing.

[1213] Wow.

[1214] For a second, I thought it is so cool.

[1215] I know we have a cool podcast, but the fact that Dave Grohl would sit in the back.

[1216] My friends make me all the time and they're like, guys, Dave Grohl's here at the bar for you drinks.

[1217] I'm like, I cannot cover this at all.

[1218] You kind of sound like.

[1219] like him too.

[1220] No, and you know what?

[1221] We've, I've met him many times, and the resemblance is actually striking.

[1222] You could get away with all kinds of stuff.

[1223] I was at a wine tasting once, and the Simon Ler was like, you know, as a sidekick, I take photos for a bottle rock.

[1224] And I'm his photographer.

[1225] I'm like, I met him before.

[1226] I'm like, oh, that's sick.

[1227] Like, what's he like?

[1228] He's like, he's so nice, but he's a little bit taller than you.

[1229] I'm like, oh, great.

[1230] Fantastic.

[1231] Yeah, yeah.

[1232] Well, I, I just think, if I were you, I'd be out signing checks in his name.

[1233] renting limos and not paying for them.

[1234] I got a free Danny's Grand Slam once.

[1235] I'm writing on that.

[1236] I remember once that years and years ago there was someone who was pretending to be me and driving around in a limo and charging things.

[1237] And I'm like, of all the people you can choose to pretend to be, who says I'm Conan O 'Brien?

[1238] Apparently he didn't even look that much like me when he was writing around saying, yeah, Conan's the name, O 'Brien, see?

[1239] Put it on my account.

[1240] And I don't know why that would work, but apparently it did.

[1241] You should all try it.

[1242] Well, sir, who looks strikingly like Dave Grohl, I think even handsomer, and that's a compliment to you, not to Grohl.

[1243] Tell me, what is your question?

[1244] He asked it.

[1245] He asked it.

[1246] He asked him to have a Chilchuk.

[1247] He asked if we can have another season of Chilchuk.

[1248] I couldn't listen to the question because I was saying, shit, it's Dave Grohl.

[1249] What the fuck is he doing here?

[1250] And so the question just went out of my head.

[1251] It was, is there a plan for a new chill chums this summer?

[1252] There is.

[1253] Yeah.

[1254] There's going to be a chill chums this summer.

[1255] It's in the books, as a matter of fact.

[1256] Yeah.

[1257] It's been, the date has been set, and we will record a chill chums, and it's going to be a fun one.

[1258] It's going to be a really fun time.

[1259] Yeah.

[1260] I have a question because you, sir, Mr. Grohl, brought this up, which is, will there be alcohol again this time?

[1261] Oh, yeah.

[1262] I've already started working up a cocktail.

[1263] Oh, cool.

[1264] Because the one last time was lethal, and Sona very quickly was blotto.

[1265] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1266] And this is true, right?

[1267] My tolerance is really low, and I had one of it, and I was feeling no pain.

[1268] It was great.

[1269] I'm totally down for another.

[1270] Or we could take edibles.

[1271] I'd be down for that.

[1272] Well, of course, we'll have to check with the sponsor.

[1273] Oh, okay, right.

[1274] Sorry.

[1275] Sounds like, no, my AA sponsor.

[1276] That's the sponsor, I meant.

[1277] Yeah.

[1278] Yeah, no, we're going to do it.

[1279] That was fun.

[1280] I remember, I was cautious.

[1281] I sipped.

[1282] I sipped slowly because I'm a broadcast professional.

[1283] Oh, we didn't sip.

[1284] No, we were chugging.

[1285] You guys were chugging.

[1286] And those were amazing drinks you made.

[1287] Thank you.

[1288] They were fantastic.

[1289] Yeah, I got to live up to it.

[1290] I haven't quite arrived there yet.

[1291] I don't know.

[1292] I'm concocting.

[1293] I'm working on it.

[1294] Get off my back.

[1295] I'm threatened by any man that says, I'm concocting.

[1296] get off my back you're already working on it well I'm always working on alcohol oh okay very good yeah that's a good man over there yes anyone else who looks like a very famous rock and roll star I want to say anything hi I'm Tim what's your name Tim hey Tim Elise my wife are here Elise how are you really loves you Conan Sona Matt love you guys oh I love you too I was important I don't know them so how can we love him but I know he's right we love you Thank you.

[1297] I was wondering, will you guys be doing any Comic -Con stuff in the future?

[1298] Well, here's the deal.

[1299] We, for many years, did Comic -Con every year through the Late Night Show.

[1300] And that was really fun because no late -night show had done Comic -Con before.

[1301] There's an amazing theater in downtown San Diego called The Spreckles, which is an old vaudeville theater that the Marks Brothers performed in.

[1302] And, I mean, just this classic great 1920s venue.

[1303] and we would do shows that were all Comic -Con themed and they were so much fun.

[1304] You were there for all those.

[1305] There's probably some of my favorite shows you've ever done.

[1306] There are some of my favorite cold opens.

[1307] We would shoot these incredible pieces that parodied Mad Max and we would use like film cameras and we would really go to town and we did my origin stories.

[1308] And the audience was packed with people who had been at Comic -Con all day.

[1309] So the audience was just filled with Wonder Woman's and hoax and Batman's.

[1310] And, I mean, it was absolutely so much fun to do.

[1311] It was.

[1312] And then the question becomes, now there's not a late -night show, but there's a podcast, but is there a way that we could go back?

[1313] And I'd be very intrigued because I loved going there.

[1314] I love the energy of it.

[1315] It's one of the greatest fan bases of all time.

[1316] And I think it kind of neatly meshes with our style of comedy.

[1317] I think there's like a nice symbiotic relationship where, we're fans of a lot of these films too and it worked really nicely so I'd love to say that yes in the future there's no plan right now but in the future I'd love to get back to Comic -Con and you know I met my husband after one of those shows after one of the week of shows that's right tell me what happened we were walking around we had just finished a week of shows and we were walking and me and a friend of mine were walking around the actual Comic -Con floor and then my friend knew the friend that Tack was walking with and then we met hit it off and then right away did you know yeah I did I did yeah but like two years later we were married you guys both met your spouses on Conan show related things yeah yeah yeah I met my wife shooting a segment for uh late night with Conan O 'Brien and you through the Conan show at TBS yes so it is the greatest dating site of all time yeah if anyone's looking for yeah their their special person um just come hang out with me and uh I guarantee you'll meet them within seven years.

[1318] Yeah, that's really the best I can do seven years.

[1319] My lawyers have said you really can't over promise.

[1320] So I think that's it for today, isn't it?

[1321] Is that it?

[1322] Yeah, I think that's it.

[1323] I do want to say, well, first of all, thanks to Kelly Clarkson for being here, because I love her.

[1324] I love her, too.

[1325] Incredibly talented.

[1326] Thanks to T -Mobile for helping make this all possible.

[1327] This doesn't happen.

[1328] This doesn't happen.

[1329] unless we get our sponsors.

[1330] So that's very cool.

[1331] And I also want to thank you guys.

[1332] You were a great audience.

[1333] You were really nice.

[1334] We were right up there with the audience that's in the hall that works for me. Seriously, thank you all very much.

[1335] And come on, see us next time.

[1336] Thanks a lot.

[1337] Conan O 'Brien needs a friend.

[1338] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Goreley.

[1339] Produced by me, Matt Goreley.

[1340] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Nick Leow, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf.

[1341] Theme song by The White Stripes.

[1342] Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.

[1343] Take it away, Jimmy.

[1344] Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples.

[1345] Engineering by Eduardo Perez.

[1346] Additional production support by Mars Melnick.

[1347] Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.

[1348] You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode.

[1349] Got a question for Conan?

[1350] Call the Team Coco Hotline at 323 -251 -2821 and leave a message.

[1351] It too could be featured on a future episode.

[1352] And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

[1353] Let's face it, we live in the future.

[1354] The future!

[1355] So why are you settling?

[1356] You deserve 5G coverage in more places and you don't have to pay an arm in a leg to get it.

[1357] Let's say you're stuck in traffic or catching up with friends and family.

[1358] You can trust T -Mobile to help you stay connected while you're on the road.

[1359] I think this all the time.

[1360] I like to go ballooning sometimes, you know?

[1361] I'm a balloonist, an aerialist, if you will.

[1362] I like to float around, and I want to make sure that I have my phone with my T -Mobile coverage in case something goes wrong with a balloon.

[1363] Let's say a bird pierces it that happened once.

[1364] It was a swallow.

[1365] Anyway, the balloon started to go down.

[1366] I panicked, but I was calm because I had T -Mobile coverage.

[1367] I met a few calls.

[1368] I was rescued.

[1369] Everything went well thanks to T -Mobile.

[1370] Please don't look into that story.

[1371] But it is true about T -Mobile.

[1372] They're the best.

[1373] T -Mobile covers more highway miles with 5G than anybody else.

[1374] So if you need great coverage, especially when you're on the go, check out T -Mobile.

[1375] You're the largest and fastest 5G network.

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[1377] Find out more at T -Mobile .com slash C -Y.

[1378] That's T -Mobile .com slash S -E -E -W -H -Y.

[1379] Conan O 'Brien does not go ballooning.

[1380] That was made up.

[1381] Fast is based on media and overall combined 5G speeds according to analysis by Ukla of speed test intelligence data for Q1 -20203.

[1382] See 5G device coverage and access details at T -Mobile .com.