#366 - Bobcat Goldthwait

[0] The Joe Rogan experience.

[1] Train by day, Joe Rogan, podcast by night, all day.

[2] This is officially where the serious satellite part starts.

[3] All right.

[4] The other part with the commercials is only on the internet.

[5] Got you.

[6] That's why it seems like we don't need the music.

[7] There's probably a better way to do this.

[8] It's probably a real momentum killer too.

[9] Doing the commercials as a part of the sitting while someone sits there.

[10] I got to tell you, I wouldn't mind if you did them through the show because grandpa's got to pee a lot.

[11] And the last time I was on, I didn't know I could get up.

[12] Listen, any time, you need to be.

[13] I got a catheter this time.

[14] Just bring a bucket.

[15] Have you ever had a catheter?

[16] No, I bet it sucks.

[17] Cheese and crackers.

[18] Those are my two biggest things is getting a catheter, which I got.

[19] So I'm over that.

[20] And it really, but by the time you need one, it's sweet relief.

[21] It was the nicest thing anybody ever put my be home.

[22] That's Bobcat Goldwick, ladies and gentlemen.

[23] I'm playing Bobcat Goldthwaite tonight.

[24] This is Bob Scratch Goldfarb, ladies and gentlemen.

[25] Thanks for having me back on.

[26] Oh, please.

[27] Thanks for being.

[28] I really fucking loved your Bigfoot movie.

[29] Oh, thanks, man. I watched it last night, and I was really psyched to watch it because I'm a Bigfoot dork.

[30] I'm a Bigfoot dork from way back.

[31] You know, I know that, but I also was a little, you're the first person I gave it to that didn't see it with an audience.

[32] I've been doing some, like, screenings at film festivals and things.

[33] And I thought it, I was worried because I'm really happy you liked it.

[34] Because I didn't know if it would lose something sitting there by yourself.

[35] No, no, no, no. Because it's fun to watch them.

[36] movie with an audience yeah i was in baltimore and um it was beautiful because it was a really uh baltimore's great and so a really mixed crowd uh and i mean all races and all working classes and stuff come to this festival so i'm sitting behind it was beautiful through through the movie i was sitting right next to a couple black guys who were beautiful they're like they're going crazy big foot big foot i can't tell you which part but i was a guy go mm -hmm big foot and they were yelling and it was made me so happy well there was I had to ask you about something before we got on the air because it was such a creepy movie there's so many moments and I didn't want to give away any spoilers so I knew I'm like I gotta ask him this before the podcast starts yeah well yeah and yeah so I try not to talk about some of the things that are revealed but I just talk about a lot of the movie I'm really happy thank you I mean this is the first review I mean I got a couple I shouldn't say there's some nice reviews online but that's really nice I loved it I loved it and one of the things I loved about it is you you are completely true to bigfoot lore like you you added in all the stuff that big foot like the knocking and the howling sounded exactly like a real saskatch yeah and i didn't and i didn't i didn't go in to be snarky i mean i think the movies got stuff in it that's funny but i i i wasn't trying to you know i wasn't trying to mock uh believers in saskatch i just because of a couple of reasons one i've always saw myself as as an outsider so why am i going to pick on one of the most picked upon subcultures you know i was talking to dan harman we were breaking it down like in picked upon or misunderstood groups it goes like renfair enthusiasts then it goes uh teleban and then saskatch enthusiasts like as far as people will cut them some slack or try to understand where they're coming from yeah that's hilarious that's so true poor saskatch hunters they don't catch they don't catch a break ever well you know i went to where the patterson gimblin footage was shot And that was the germ of the whole movie for me, really.

[37] It was me since I was nine years old wanting to go to that site.

[38] That's really, and then I happened to make a movie, but that's the reality of it.

[39] I'd love to tell you I didn't well up, but I did.

[40] I'm sure you did.

[41] I would, too.

[42] I don't believe in that footage.

[43] I think that Bob Patterson footage is utter horseshit.

[44] Really?

[45] But why?

[46] Well, this is a good.

[47] First of all, because there was a guy that says he did it named Bob Hieronymus.

[48] Yeah, Bob Hieronymus, but Bob Moronimus can't find it on a map, though.

[49] He can't find Bluff Creek on a map, or he couldn't.

[50] I mean, he's gone, but...

[51] Yeah, well, just because he...

[52] There's a lot of places I've been, and I couldn't find out a map.

[53] Yeah, that's true.

[54] I go home to Syracuse, and I go, I live here.

[55] I know I lived on this street.

[56] I know that's where Dougie Toole and I hit Danny with a shovel, but...

[57] I went back to where I went to high school.

[58] That sounds like I killed someone.

[59] I want to clear that up.

[60] I did not.

[61] Where'd you go to high school?

[62] Newton South, Massachusetts?

[63] Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[64] I grew up Jersey and Massachusetts?

[65] No, no, no. No, I was, but Jersey was born.

[66] Born, yeah.

[67] But I lived in San Francisco.

[68] It was a long story, but age first, one through seven, I lived in New Jersey, seven through 11, San Francisco, 11 through 13, Florida, and then 13 through 25, probably New York, Boston, and then New York.

[69] So 25, New York, 27, LA, and keeps going.

[70] It makes for an interesting person.

[71] It makes you a very insecure child, though.

[72] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[73] Were you the new kid Every time?

[74] Like everywhere, man Really?

[75] Yeah, that's why I learned martial arts.

[76] I got tired of people fucking with me. Did they beat you up?

[77] Yeah, the people always threatened to.

[78] I got lucky that I avoided it.

[79] But you're a funny guy.

[80] I mean, didn't you use that?

[81] I wasn't very funny.

[82] You're going to be honest.

[83] I wasn't.

[84] You could have had writers.

[85] You know?

[86] I mean, you didn't, you know, you know, sometimes you got good delivery.

[87] I wasn't comfortable enough to be funny.

[88] I probably would have been funny around people if I got to know them really well, but around like in class.

[89] Oh, that's fascinating.

[90] So you're really quiet.

[91] Yeah.

[92] And then getting picked on and then you learn how to kick ass?

[93] But how often did you actually have to use it?

[94] Never.

[95] Yeah, that's the thing, right?

[96] I've got one fight in high school.

[97] It was really quick.

[98] And it was, you know, I probably could have avoided it.

[99] Like, sometimes I think about it.

[100] I could have avoided it.

[101] And do you regret you didn't avoid it?

[102] A little bit because I hurt the kid.

[103] Sure.

[104] I didn't hurt him bad.

[105] You know, I just hit him in the stomach.

[106] How long was this fight?

[107] It was pretty quick.

[108] Yeah, it was at a point where I was, I was competing a lot in martial arts tournaments.

[109] So this guy hit you, I mean, he's...

[110] He was going to...

[111] And then you took him out without how many hits?

[112] Okay, it was just one.

[113] Yeah, that's...

[114] But that's kind of badass, but now...

[115] If you didn't know that, if you didn't know you could do that, you wouldn't respect it.

[116] Well, it's also, I probably did it to show off.

[117] You know, I could have avoided it.

[118] I could have avoided it.

[119] Like, even though he's kind of a dick.

[120] Got you.

[121] He's also a young kid just like me. We're both retarded.

[122] That's your own squirting out of your ears.

[123] Yeah.

[124] Make mistakes.

[125] Sometimes you start things.

[126] You don't even want to finish, but you're stuck in a quagmire.

[127] Yeah.

[128] And was there people around?

[129] Yeah.

[130] That had to be the last fight.

[131] I mean, no one probably messed with you after that.

[132] Well, I mean, people are always, if you are looking for trouble, you're going to find trouble.

[133] Right.

[134] I was never, I never looked for trouble.

[135] Right.

[136] But there's, when you're in high school, there's unavoidable situations where you don't even want to be somewhere you're like you don't mean in your life you have control over what you choose to do for an occupation and who you're with the kind of people maybe like maybe my shape and everything protected me from you know i mean like if you kick my ass you'd be it's embarrassing oh you kick goldwaite's ass oh big deal like you you kick the fat doughy guy's ass and did your fist get stuck there was there suction noises but i i never was like I always wanted to avoid conflicts.

[137] Of course.

[138] You know, the only reason why I ever learned martial arts at all was so that I would be scary enough so people left me alone.

[139] Yeah, but I mean like, and I always, there's a bit in my act about, you know, the voice of death, and that's, you know, I'm going to kill you.

[140] You know, a guy who's like, I'm going to kill you!

[141] It's just some dumb drunk jock that his buddy's got to pull him off of him so he doesn't get in a fight with you.

[142] I've met so many scary people in my life.

[143] As far as physically scary people, especially all the years working for the UFC.

[144] Right, right.

[145] Like, the idea of running around in the same world as some of these people was fucking terrifying.

[146] Right.

[147] You know, because most, like, UFC fighters are very calm and they get it all out in the gym.

[148] But if you zig when you should have zagged and you run into the wrong person and the wrong time, like many people have, you're, you're, it's like it's up to them whether or not you stay safe.

[149] It's up to them whether or not they just beat the fucking shit out of you.

[150] I've seen it happen to people before.

[151] It's really, I saw a guy get knocked out in Denver.

[152] I was at the Comedy Works in Denver It was a really cool place And I saw something happen That totally didn't need to happen There was a guy who was walking down the street And he was really fucking drunk And there was another guy who was sober And the guy was drunk said something stupid To the guy was sober But he wasn't a threat It was clearly not a threat Right But then the guy who was sober Just beat the shit out of him And you can tell the dude was totally impaired And the other guy was like Stronger, more athletic anyway He was just looking for an excuse To beat the shit out of him Yeah, he just wanted to beat someone up.

[153] It's like the heckler figures out they're going to heckle and the guy who gets in a fight, you know, before they even leave the house.

[154] I mean, I really believe that.

[155] Some people do, yeah.

[156] Some people just draw that in the room.

[157] But I don't know how we went from Bigfoot to ass kicking, but that's all right.

[158] I mean, you know, but, you know, it's like I'm not proud that I have the ability to really, and I'm not known for this.

[159] I mean, people, a lot of folks aren't familiar that I do stand up, but, you know, that I can really decimate someone in the audience.

[160] I can really.

[161] I mean, I bet you can.

[162] Really bad.

[163] And in fact, I truly don't usually even, my daughter and my new wife, the 09, my exes, they all.

[164] You caught with the 09?

[165] The 09, yeah.

[166] Still got the new car smell.

[167] So, like, the 09, you know, they see this, like, switch go on and they leave the room.

[168] They get uncomfortable, and it's just like, and I'm really not proud of that.

[169] It's a horrible skill, you know.

[170] Well, it's a defense man. mechanism for doing stand -up i think but like you don't even i mean when it gets going i truly don't know yeah i mean you talk about the comedy works man it was this uh oh my god you know people will yell at where they're from and there there's this this horrible night there and i love the comedy works i think that's probably if not the best club it's one of the best in the whole country but one of those you know horrible shows and you know people go do the voice do the voice you know they want me to do this voice from the how they know me from years ago and i'm not doing it and and and then this woman in the back of the room She goes, I'm from Aurora.

[171] And I go, I know you've learned to sit in the back.

[172] And I truly didn't think of that in advance, you know.

[173] And I felt, did I feel bad?

[174] You know, it was such a weird response that even the crowd, like, kind of didn't go, whoa.

[175] They kind of just pretend they didn't hear it because it was so weird and horrible.

[176] But, like, I really kind of, the switch goes, and I say things.

[177] And I'm not saying I don't take responsibility for him, but I'm usually later on kind of surprised that I said.

[178] you know i i berated a table full women this one night and uh and they were very you know they're acting like the show is all about them i just berated this table of women and then one stood up sobbing and she's like going by the way i forgot even what i said and it was a couple minutes later by the way people love these kind of stories and they love watching it i mean the bar's never emptied out they go two guys are getting along in the parking lot let's watch so i'm up there and and and this woman stands up crying she goes was, I'm not a whore.

[179] It's my birthday.

[180] Oh, no. These are the things I'm not proud of.

[181] Do you think that that comes from doing stand -up in bars or around Boston to building that defense mechanism?

[182] Of course, in Boston, that was the hardest, hardest place to do stand -of -comedy.

[183] It was horrible.

[184] But, but when I got started, it created so many unique characters and so many, you know, I got started and it's like, you know, who came out of that group, it was like, you know, Lenny Clark and Dennis Leary and Stephen Wright and Barry Crimmons and, you know, just all these different unique voices that came out, my friend Tony Vee.

[185] And so it was really tough to do comedy, Paula Poundstone, but you were forced to have your own voice, you know?

[186] Yeah, you guys were ahead of me, and when I first started doing comedy and started doing open mic night, I was really aware because of all you guys, like what a crazy scene it was.

[187] Yeah, it was.

[188] I mean, it was really...

[189] There's so few places on Earth.

[190] People hate this on my podcast.

[191] Oh, they're going to talk about Boston comedy again.

[192] Oh, really?

[193] Oh, sorry.

[194] No, it's not sorry.

[195] Because Bill Burr and I have had these conversations.

[196] I'll tell one or two Boston stories.

[197] It was an amazing place.

[198] I think I've touched on this on your podcast, and I really rarely talk about it.

[199] But I am...

[200] I don't drink.

[201] I don't take drugs, but I don't tell people about it.

[202] But I just did.

[203] Right.

[204] But I haven't since I was 19 years old.

[205] So this story is that.

[206] long ago.

[207] I started doing comedy when I was 15.

[208] I got an 11 when I was 20.

[209] So this is like a story when I'm 18 with, I'll say, there's Lenny Clark and all those guys and we boarded up the doors in the windows at the dingho with cardboard, right?

[210] And we're just drinking and doing piles of blow.

[211] And all night, and then the door opens and it's like smoky and backlit because the sunlight's pouring in and it's a bunch of cops come walking in.

[212] And I'm just high and gacked out of my mind and I'm going I'm going to jail I'm going to jail that's all I'm thinking and the cops go Lenny you fucking cock -sucker how are you?

[213] And they sit down and they start doing blow and I'm like yeah and I'm like there is no there's no God yeah yeah up is down you know we'd do it was a Chinese comedy club and we would ding ho we would cut lines on the ribs you know the pork ribs yeah we'd be in the freezer chopping lines on those orange pork clips, the ribs, the red ones, you know what I'm talking?

[214] Oh, that's hilarious.

[215] You do lines on those?

[216] Yeah, because it'd be a flat surface.

[217] And then I'm just thinking like these families that get served up this.

[218] Oh my God, blow -covered pork ribs.

[219] Pork ribs.

[220] And Junior's bouncing off the walls.

[221] Whenever we go to the dingho, he's so animated.

[222] Now, this was like in the 80s.

[223] Did you guys get real Coke back then, or was it all chopped up still?

[224] I think we were getting high, yeah.

[225] No, but no, but you know what I'm saying?

[226] I don't know the difference.

[227] I mean, I I've never done Coke.

[228] Oh, really?

[229] Well, I did it, and like I said, I stopped everything when I was 19.

[230] I know people don't believe that.

[231] The folks who do it, though, will tell you there's, like, rock star Coke, like, pure Coke, which is amazing.

[232] And then there's, like, you know Tom Sawyer from the, from Cobbs?

[233] Sure.

[234] Yeah.

[235] Tom will tell you, like, if you talk to him about old school, like, rock star Coke.

[236] Well, I've talked to some of the Boston comics who, like, you know, I didn't quit because I got sober.

[237] I quit because the shit got bad.

[238] The Coke got bad.

[239] Like, they were disappointed.

[240] pointed in the quality of a blow.

[241] I wasn't getting fucking high anymore.

[242] Apparently, it's a very different experience.

[243] If you get, like, real cocaine, 100 % pure cocaine, it's a very different experience than what a lot of people are getting is speed.

[244] You're getting, like, Coke mixed with some sort of amphetamines.

[245] No, because I would do, I had done speed, and it didn't affect me the way the Coke did.

[246] So that's my Pepsi challenge.

[247] I guess it's very scientific.

[248] I don't know.

[249] They cut it with things.

[250] I don't know what they're cutting.

[251] The baby laxative and vitamin B is like, yeah.

[252] That's a big one with, um, uh, ecstasy.

[253] They cut it with...

[254] They cut it with speed, apparently.

[255] Speed.

[256] Sometimes you don't get all pure X. You get a bunch of funky amphetamines in there.

[257] Wow.

[258] So what we're trying to say to the kids?

[259] Don't do bad coke.

[260] Yeah, I'm...

[261] So you guys were doing it with the cops.

[262] With the cops.

[263] I mean, there would always be stories like that.

[264] You know, the guy's, you know, a guy would steal some guy's joke and then somebody's arm will get broke.

[265] I mean, it was not, I mean, it really, that's the reality of it.

[266] Well, Dane Cook was on the podcast once we, he and I were talking about how the guys who were doing comedy were men, like Kevin Knox and Lenny Clark, these big men.

[267] He's like manly.

[268] And it was a very, yeah, squeenie.

[269] It was just like, very aggressive.

[270] Oh, yeah.

[271] Yeah, it wasn't like.

[272] Don Gavin.

[273] Like people are going, oh, you're in Cambridge.

[274] And they're imagining that we've got pipes and we got patches on our sweaters.

[275] Like, you know.

[276] Yeah, you're coming out with like one of those sway jackets with the Indian things.

[277] I was like an overstepped chair and we're sitting there talking about Noel coward references and stuff but no it was pretty down and dirty but you know it was the best place to train I mean because you know you you were ready for you know the heckles were insane the violence and it really is weird to think about how much comedy and violence was in that scene it was a crazy scene I'll try to keep some of the people lot of this story but but one of the guys I was with one night you know when someone's partying and they just the switch is thrown and they become gorgo you know I mean like they're just not themselves completely you know I mean and one of our buddies insisted that he and I were Vikings and he was really the commitment he had to this character was he was a Viking and he was holding me in a headlock and he wouldn't let me go and and to the point where it got creepy like he was just dragging me around the bar, it was funny, and then it went, for a long time.

[278] Like, I was, you know, and I couldn't do anything.

[279] He was much larger than me. And then Barry Crimmons, I remember at the time, had a cast.

[280] And the guy who had me in Hadlock, who, by the way, he's a friend.

[281] He just had a rough night that night.

[282] He says, and Crimmons goes, he goes, let him go.

[283] And he goes, and the guy goes, hug me or hit me. And Crimmons goes, that was the fastest decision I ever made in my life.

[284] He just popped him with the cast.

[285] broke his jaw That's hilarious That's comedy Yeah it was It was crazy It was man It really was I came just behind you guys And one of my big regrets Was that I never got to perform With the Ding Ho Because it was so legendary Yeah Well it was because the The comics were in charge basically You know The booking and all that stuff So it was It was yeah it was crazy Well that's sort of how The comedy story used to be Except for the booking aspect of it You know The comics were never in charge of the booking of it but there was no real crowd control there was all comics working the booth comics would work at the door the comedy store was like it's all comics working well this was this was yeah this was pretty much mayhem his guy shun lee he ran the dingho and he talked to me maybe twice one night i go out on stage and i'm doing my character and you know i'm full board right And then I stop, and I say, you know, hi, this is my real voice.

[286] I'd like to gut and clean some fish tonight.

[287] Does anyone have any fish?

[288] You know, really straight, I'm saying this.

[289] And my roommate raises his hand, he pulls out this big fish.

[290] Now, the fish would have been in the trunk of his car, so it's rancid.

[291] Oh, no. So I just gut the fish and gut entrails.

[292] Fish entrails all over the stage.

[293] And this woman just contact vomited.

[294] As soon as she smelled, it's just like, oh.

[295] So I'm a professional.

[296] I put the mic right down to her so you can hear her.

[297] retching over the PA.

[298] Oh, Jesus.

[299] So this chicks were puking up, this fish cut, vomit all over the front of the stage.

[300] And then I go, well, thank you, good night.

[301] And so the next guy, was Bill Campbell around when you were all?

[302] This guy, a really sweet guy, but his act is, you know, talking about, you know, relationships.

[303] You know, man, go to, you know.

[304] Yeah.

[305] It's just guts and fish.

[306] And he goes, you know, so he, his act is destroyed because of this kind of stuff.

[307] Yeah, very nice, a wholesome kind of act, and then I did this.

[308] And then, Sean Lee, there's the only time, first time he talked to me, he goes, he pulls me over to talk to him.

[309] He goes, Bobby, you weird.

[310] You weird.

[311] That's how he said, Bobby, you weird.

[312] Wow, what a great boss.

[313] Yeah, yeah, that was, yeah, it was like, I still did this, you know, second show.

[314] Don't do the fish, you know.

[315] Don't do the fish.

[316] No more, no more fish.

[317] That is hilarious.

[318] But, yeah, so it was.

[319] What year did the dingo end?

[320] I don't know.

[321] I was gone by the time.

[322] It met its demise, but.

[323] When did you bail?

[324] When were you out of Boston?

[325] I went to San Francisco.

[326] It was all pretty quick, you know.

[327] I got on Lennerman, then it was in the early 80s.

[328] I can't, you know, really I was half in and half out of the different city, San Francisco and Boston.

[329] So, like, 82, maybe 83.

[330] I started in the 88.

[331] Oh, wow.

[332] So it was way after.

[333] Yeah, the Boston comedy scene.

[334] When did it really start?

[335] When was, like, the birth of it?

[336] It was before I got there, and I got there at the, like, 80, the end of 80, probably.

[337] Did you see Fran Salomita's, dot?

[338] Oh, sure.

[339] Yeah.

[340] Yeah.

[341] I'm a little bit in that.

[342] Yeah.

[343] Yeah.

[344] It taps some of it, but there's still Yeah.

[345] There's still stuff that was, uh, that, I mean, he did a great job.

[346] But it wasn't raw dog.

[347] Well, there's just some things in there that, you know, well, the one thing is funny is that I watched that movie with Lenny Clark and part of the story is that these guys don't like me because I get on Letterman, you know, and that was true.

[348] I mean, oh yeah.

[349] And they got really mad because I'm, you know, I don't know, younger than them.

[350] I come in.

[351] from Syracuse, I get on Letterman, like, you know, probably in a year or so, you know, I would have been pissed too.

[352] But, you know, Lenny would be, you know, and Lenny and our friends, actually, we're going to do a project together, but at the time, Lenny was really pissed, you know, he was like, you know, he's throwing me into a wall, what the fuck is your, you know, it's not your turn.

[353] Yeah, what is that?

[354] That was a thing with that place.

[355] It's like they felt, it was almost like a union gig.

[356] It was like you didn't put in your seniority.

[357] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[358] So, so, um, that became part of that movie, but, you know, I said there and watched it with Lenny and we just kind of laughed together you know and and I watched it with my daughter too it was really great for my daughter it was really cool to have her watch that wow yeah I have a pretty good experience I'll tell a good story if you don't mind yeah we got go about my daughter so um my daughter is a costumer she works in commercials and movies and stuff and I'm very proud because she's taking a creative life and she she does great work we work together and my wife and we all work and everybody works when I make a movie all my friends and family so but I get this text from my daughter she was working on that project and it says dad maybe I shouldn't say this one oh I'm going to fuck it I'm in the middle so she says dad I have a disaster she says to the text she goes I have diarrhea and I went into Russell Brand's dressing room and I'm using his toilet and he doesn't know I'm in here and he just came back in and she's trapped in the back and I have to go back to the set she says what do I do I go make him feel uncomfortable just open the door and go hi Russell Brand I had to change my tampon shark week and so my daughter text back dad you're great I love you now she thinks I'm trying to help her out of an uncomfortable situation but really I'm going what could I have her say so Russell Brand won't try to fuck her That's hilarious That's exactly Because of course I'm going This is bad This is bad In the bathroom She thinks I'm being cute If he hypnotizes her Yeah I mean You know And that's his thing You know And then I'm like And then I go What happened And I'm like My feelings are hurt too I'm like Well he didn't try Yeah Which makes me a creep But I don't know It was weird What was the motivation for making this Bigfoot movie because this is like completely for me I mean I found out about this like three weeks ago Oh okay And also folks if they're familiar A lot of folks don't make I make movies But it's completely different than like World's Great Dad or God Bless America Shakes the Clown It's a lot different than Shakes the Clown Was fucking great Oh thanks man That's a fucking great movie Tom Kenny and I Who's name drop is now the voice of SpongeBob Is Binky the Clown in that movie And he's again cocaine He's doing San Francisco stand -up.

[359] But I've known Tommy since I was six.

[360] We were introduced by a crying nun at St. Matthews.

[361] Well, we weren't introduced.

[362] Tommy tells the story better, but he says, his fat kids dragged behind this nun who's just sobbing.

[363] And she dragged me into his classroom and goes, because we were in two different first grades.

[364] She's like, I can't take him anymore.

[365] And she left me in this class.

[366] And I was so, I felt horrible.

[367] I was so embarrassed.

[368] I started crying, too.

[369] But he thought it was cool that I could make a nun cry.

[370] so he introduced himself at lunch That's hilarious We've been now Yeah we're both I'm 51 He'll be 51 in July But so yeah I've known Tom Kenny He's Binky the Clown Him and I were watching a shakes They showed shakes And people Recently And people showed up As characters And they know the dialogue And there's clown hoars there These women were just as slutty clowns And in the middle of it Tommy leans over to me He goes What the fuck were we thinking He's like we're going What is this one?

[371] movie about.

[372] And the crowd was really evening up.

[373] It was like that Shatner sketch on SNL.

[374] We were like, get a life.

[375] You know, we were really wigged out by the but, you know, if you make a movie, you better be willing to talk about it.

[376] Oh, yeah.

[377] Because even my small indie films that I do under the radar and they play festivals, you're going to talk about them for the rest of your life.

[378] So you better kind of stand by it.

[379] And that's part of this movie was that I've always been fascinated with Bigfoot.

[380] I've always been super interested in the Patterson Gimlin footage you know and and so I I uh it wasn't that long ago the 09 she's like saying she knows me she goes go go go to your big foot so I put about 1 ,400 miles on the car just in California just driving around famous sites talking to different people until I made it all the way up to Willow Creek you know and so you did this just to sort of form the idea in your head yeah well I wasn't I didn't have a move I had a different movie in in my head, which I still think I'll write because I thought it one of the things that's fascinating about Sasquatch is it's a good everybody I wanted to do a thing that kind of this isn't this movie, but I had an idea for a movie that kind of took on faith and religion and everything and I thought maybe I'd said it in the Sasquatch community because there's people that just believe and there's people that believe and see, there's people that are sheisters, there's people, I mean so it's a really good it's a good analogy for religion but you know I don't know where you sit on the pointy head or less pointy headed Bigfoot Isn't that funny that you brought that up?

[381] That's funny because I saw this guy go over to another guy at a conference and the guy's got a cardboard head with a big pointy headed Bigfoot and the guy goes, you disgust me and he goes, really?

[382] He goes look at that head.

[383] He said you disgust me and look at that like he knows.

[384] Yeah and the other dude goes really?

[385] I've seen Bigfoot three times and you're never going to see him because you smoke.

[386] Whoa.

[387] Said that to him?

[388] Yeah, and I was like going...

[389] That's pretty gangster.

[390] Yeah, and I also said, wow, this is beautiful.

[391] You know, this is really amazing.

[392] It's like, so subcultures are fascinating to me. I love the fact that you can get into discussions and go down these crazy rabbit holes with everybody.

[393] And I do.

[394] You know, here's the thing.

[395] When you say you believe, that means people say you're no longer impartial.

[396] But I'm going to, but everybody has, you know, so I'm not impartial.

[397] I do believe that there's a Sasquatch out there.

[398] Wow.

[399] Or, I should say, Bigfoot, plural.

[400] You went there.

[401] You said, I believe there's a Sasquatch.

[402] Yeah, I mean, look at my career, what's going to happen?

[403] You know, people can say, Popcat Goldway is weird.

[404] Woo -hoo, hoo -hoo.

[405] That is one of those subjects, though, where it's like UFO.

[406] or psychics or something along those lines.

[407] As soon as you start talking about it, you're almost immediately a silly person.

[408] Yeah, but I'm already a silly person.

[409] Yeah.

[410] I'm so far off the radar.

[411] I do what I like to.

[412] It's freedom, right?

[413] It's freedom.

[414] Yeah, it's completely.

[415] You know, about seven, eight years ago, I really just kind of quit.

[416] I stopped being in stuff that I was embarrassed of.

[417] I still do something if it's nice and the bread's there, but for the most part, I just quit.

[418] You know, I stopped trying to get jobs.

[419] I didn't want to get discovered.

[420] I stopped writing more.

[421] movies for other people that I wasn't getting paid for that I thought they would like or I stopped I stopped all of it and I just and I was and I was fortunately enough Jimmy Kimmel hired me to direct his show and that's a big deal that's a huge deal because you know I mean people we did the spell show a little bit as well I did a little Chappelle we ran into each other in Manhattan that was weird that was yeah totally random and um so worked on Chappelle and then but working for Jimmy you know kind of just gave me this freedom.

[422] It was nice that someone believed in me, you know, when pretty much I'd become, and still am possibly, but a punchline.

[423] Well, we talked about it before the podcast, during the commercials, the thing with the Tonight Show.

[424] That was the big thing.

[425] Yeah, well, there's that.

[426] And also just this persona, people who had an assload of.

[427] And just, you know, and I didn't even, you know, I got really frustrated because I was just being famous for being famous.

[428] And this is before the, you know, the digital age.

[429] I just got really tired of being like you would book me on a talk show.

[430] I'd go crazy and people would be happy.

[431] And I really was just like so over it, really destructive, you know.

[432] Were you like rebelling against like the police academy movies and that sort of box that you were putting to?

[433] It's that, but also it's it's rebelling.

[434] Truly, I think the real thing was is that I was, you know, Lennel was nice enough to have me on.

[435] And then I saw this pattern that I may have become a regular.

[436] and I've never really discussed this.

[437] That terrified me. The idea of being successful on that level.

[438] Because it's easier to be a guy who never tried and then you're in some dopey teen comedies and you can criticize what everybody else does and be bitter.

[439] But to really put your cock on the block and say, this is who I am, this is going to be my material, this is the movies, this is the products that say who I am.

[440] That's terrifying because then you're out there to be judged.

[441] That's fascinating.

[442] So it's almost like you get a self -destructive quality because the idea of the idea success was just too much pressure because then I'd have to actually pony up and actually oh so you've been criticizing X, Y, and Z?

[443] Well, what do you do?

[444] You know?

[445] So, so I was really trying to not, it was kind of funny because I was trying not to be on TV anymore and I said that the Night Show and then immediately I get booked on every show.

[446] People think like I was banned from other shows.

[447] I wasn't even banned from the Tonight Show.

[448] They actually had me on a week later, but, but it's, it's very fascinating.

[449] It's funny.

[450] I was just writing this thing.

[451] You know, I toured with nirvana as a comedian and and there would be times where you know I was a few nights where I was sitting up with Kurt and you know we were exchanging stories like you know him showing up and drag a in a gown for a headbanger's ball and nobody getting that you know that's pretty funny especially it was funny to him because he's getting asked to go on a metal show so he thought it'd be funny to show up and drag and everybody's like going this guy what a hmm you know and especially because he wasn't running around and lipstick going, wow, you know, he just was comfortable on the drag, so, it was, you know, and he's talking about nobody would get him, you know, and it was really funny.

[452] And then, and then I said, you know, like I'd, I'd smashed up the Arsini Hall show.

[453] Did way more damage on that show.

[454] I remember that too.

[455] Yeah, I wrote Paramount Sucks on the back of it because they fired him basically, and they gave him a raw deal.

[456] And it was just me trying to end it.

[457] You know, I really related more to rock than comics.

[458] I just kind of, Caboo, you know, I try to, and then...

[459] Were you upset, though, that you were, like, did you feel like you were getting pushed into some, like, family box, and it wasn't representing you, like, as a real visionary, as a real comic?

[460] A little of that, you know, it's funny.

[461] People, you know, I think the character would cloud people from hearing anything I was saying, you know, I love Meat Bob.

[462] Me, Bob, I got it when I was, like, I mean, when did it come out?

[463] Yeah, I don't know, but, yeah.

[464] I was just starting out.

[465] That's funny, because that album, like, people don't, I don't think people understood that I actually had material.

[466] I think they just saw me in Police Academy.

[467] That was what I was going to say.

[468] Yeah, that was frustrated.

[469] It was a real, it was really good comedy.

[470] It was really good stand -up.

[471] And I think a lot of people, I remember just thought you were like the crazy actor guy.

[472] Like, all the people didn't know.

[473] Like, you didn't just have stand -up.

[474] You had like really smart stand -up.

[475] It was really good stuff.

[476] But it was weird because I think I helped perpetuate it.

[477] Of course, I possibly, you know, it's kind of funny when you go on stage and you do this persona.

[478] persona, even people who are rolling their eyes start laughing, so it's hard to jettison it, especially when you go on the road and they're expecting it.

[479] It's weird to get pigeonholed.

[480] I just stopped.

[481] It was, I was on the road and I realized, oh, I don't dislike stand -up.

[482] I hate this fucking character.

[483] Did people totally expect it?

[484] Oh, yeah.

[485] And they still do.

[486] You know, do the voice, you know, and they get mad, you know.

[487] But it's just, I got to do my.

[488] I got to be me, you know, as corny as it sounds, you know.

[489] I feel you.

[490] So, but you got to quit.

[491] You know, you got to, like, there's this weird thing in our society where it's like, you know, you can't quit.

[492] And that's where you find when you're happy.

[493] You know, you say, oh, this isn't working for me, you know.

[494] I thought, oh, this isn't working for me. And so you end up in a place where you go, oh, this is what's working for you.

[495] Unfortunately, you end up there usually about 45.

[496] Well, there's a lot of people that, and they never abandon that act.

[497] And they hang on to it.

[498] Like, does Judy Tanuda still do stand -up?

[499] I don't know.

[500] She had a great act.

[501] It's funny that my wife and I brought up the old nine and I brought up Judy Tenoota today on the plane because I did the gathering in the juggalo's.

[502] Oh, wow.

[503] And we were wondering if, like, if, like, they booked the wrong acts on purpose.

[504] So we were, like, putting together a lineup like it was going to be Paula Pondstone, Judy Tanuda, and Amy Mann at this year's gathering of the jugglers.

[505] Amy man. You know, because I think that, because sometimes, did you ever see?

[506] Do you ever see the...

[507] Gagging?

[508] Yeah, I've seen it.

[509] Oh, you saw that movie.

[510] It wouldn't mean gathering the jugglers?

[511] There's a movie called...

[512] Oh, shoot.

[513] American Juggler, I think, is the name of it.

[514] No, I've just watched clips on the internet.

[515] Well, they just have...

[516] You saw Tia Tequila get hit with poo.

[517] Did she really?

[518] Yeah, man. They threw poo at her?

[519] They ran out of fago cola.

[520] So they started throwing poo at her.

[521] Oh, my God.

[522] Like, dudes were shitting in, what, cups and stuff?

[523] No, they knocked over...

[524] They knocked over a porta -pon?

[525] Yeah, yeah.

[526] It wasn't like Gigi -L and they...

[527] Someone else's poo?

[528] Yeah, which is, that's my point.

[529] Look, I'm going to digress here.

[530] Oh, that's her on stage.

[531] And they're throwing poo at her right now?

[532] Like, hypothetically, let's say you or I, I give it up.

[533] Look, she stays in there.

[534] She stays up there.

[535] Oh, Jesus, that shit just hit her legs.

[536] I love that she's, like, sitting there going, you know what?

[537] A couple of minutes, I'm going to win her back.

[538] Look at she just threw, look at that.

[539] I got to give it up.

[540] And she just threw her crotch.

[541] She just threw stuff back.

[542] shit at her.

[543] Is that all shit or is it some of the beer?

[544] I think some, no, it's fago cola.

[545] It's the soda they like to throw.

[546] But like, here's my point.

[547] If you were walking on the street and you hit me with dog poo, right?

[548] Like you saw something through it.

[549] It wouldn't be a deal breaker, but I'd be mad.

[550] I mean, like, Joe, what the fuck was that?

[551] And you go, I don't know, I thought it was funny.

[552] Yeah, we'd laugh it off.

[553] But if you hit me with like you know, like hobo dude, you know what I mean?

[554] Like some poo from a person, that would be the deal breaker.

[555] I'd be like, you fucker, I've got Hep C in my eye now, really swift.

[556] Yeah, human shit is way more terrifying than animal shit.

[557] Did you ever see G .G. Allen, like, poo?

[558] Yeah, and then he starts throwing it at people.

[559] And they get out of their way like military strifing.

[560] Like, when people in fire, something about human poo is way worse.

[561] It's terrifying.

[562] You don't want it on your clothes.

[563] No, no, no, no. So I did the dog shit on you, you just hose it off.

[564] You go, ah, yeah.

[565] But I did, yeah, the gathering of the juggalo's.

[566] Wow.

[567] And the opening act, Upchuck, the clown, is trying to calm my nerves.

[568] Now, there's no, you know, they're their own security.

[569] So there's no security.

[570] It's just juggalo law on this huge piece of property.

[571] Wow.

[572] So it's just madness?

[573] Yeah, there's fires going on and firework.

[574] Oh, my gosh.

[575] People are always lighting fire, too, like fireworks.

[576] Like, the way people light cigarettes, like casually.

[577] I saw a lot of that.

[578] It was really funny.

[579] Like, where people don't jump out of the way.

[580] It's like some bath salts.

[581] What is it like you wandering around amongst these people?

[582] Are they freaking out?

[583] No, because I think, well, they, no, sometimes I get recognized.

[584] For the most part, I don't get recognized.

[585] But it was, you know, we took a golf cart through the whole thing.

[586] And like I said, there's fights and people, I don't know what they were doing.

[587] but maybe you might know what this is, but suddenly people would drop.

[588] Like, there'd be, like, a group of people, and then you'd just see them drop.

[589] Like, they were puppets, and someone cut their strings.

[590] They just hit them.

[591] Like, is it all, like, a choreograph thing?

[592] Like, they're joking around?

[593] No, no, no, no. Like, whatever they had been doing would just suddenly.

[594] Like, a bunch of them would just drop?

[595] Yeah, it'd be, like, three or four of them.

[596] Obviously, they had just ingested or did something, and then you'd just see them go, like, like, dominoes.

[597] And then they get up, and it was, I don't know what that is.

[598] Oh, my, whatever it is, it is not good.

[599] Yeah, well, so we're, so, you know, it's, it's, I understand the idea of the jugglers, by the way.

[600] I get it, you know, I get it.

[601] It's a certain sect that's, that's pissed off, and it's certain group of people, and I, and they do have the sense of community and family.

[602] I do, I do try to be open -minded, and they were, and by the way, they were very nice to me, I should say that.

[603] That's a very good way of putting that.

[604] But, but while we were, they're, you know, Upchuk's trying to convince me that, it's not that scary of a gig and he's driving me around on this golf cart and he's like, you know, you got it and this huge clown.

[605] Everybody's kind of either some guys are cut in clown mega but a lot of them are like obese men and women.

[606] It's really like an incest survivor's convention.

[607] Like, you know, nobody's going to touch me anymore.

[608] Right.

[609] So this guy just jumps out of nowhere and starts punching Upchuk on the golf cart.

[610] He's running along and hitting him.

[611] For no reason?

[612] He's like, fuck you upchuk!

[613] Oh, my God.

[614] Fuck you, Upchuk specifically.

[615] Yeah, yeah, and he's gunning it.

[616] And the guy, so we lose the guy, and he's like, I'm here every year.

[617] You know, they know me. I'm like family, and I'm like, okay.

[618] So then...

[619] He punched him in the face?

[620] Punched him right in the face.

[621] And then he took it, like, like in the shoulder.

[622] And then by the time we got him, he got him like one, like in the kidney on the way out, like, left.

[623] He's hitting him hard?

[624] Yeah, yeah, real punches, real punches.

[625] Jesus.

[626] So now it's clown.

[627] make it was a little smudgy too he's trying to convince me this can of fago the first can of fagal comes in and it just sprays all over us and uh and he's like he's so familiar with getting hit with fagal cola he goes he goes uh it's diet it's not going to stain I swear to God he really said that that's hilarious so then one comes in and in the oh nine's got it on camera she had a sports setting on her camera, so the shutter is like faster.

[628] So we've got this shot, it's like this Zeprude film, we got this can of soda this guy does a baseball pitch, and you see it whizzing seconds before it hits uptuck right in the temple.

[629] No. Correct.

[630] And he just slumps over and he goes he slumps over the wheel and he goes, I'm hurt, I'm hurt bad.

[631] By the way, he's mid -sentence.

[632] He goes, you know, something like that when the soda hit it.

[633] I'm not going to happen out of Dave Matthews, correct, and he slumps over.

[634] He's like, I'm hurt, I'm hurt bad, Bob.

[635] He's calling me Bob, so I know he's really fucked up, not Bob Gap.

[636] And I think he was out for a second.

[637] Oh, my God.

[638] So he hits the, he hits the gas, and now, yeah, that's Upchuk, yeah, that's Joel.

[639] And so, it was like the golf cart.

[640] I was on, that's crazy.

[641] How old were you when this was going on, by the way?

[642] Just now.

[643] So, 51 years old?

[644] 50, 50 years old.

[645] And so, so, up Chuck.

[646] It's now full throttle, and I'm steering, steer, and we're whizzing through the crowd, like, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, and it's juggalo's diving out of our way.

[647] And then, oh, so I love this.

[648] This is actually beautiful, you know.

[649] He was concussed.

[650] His eyes were all fucked up, and he's like, and he's like, and we just went back to the trailer, and we're just being really quiet, and then he puts an ice cold fago on his side of his head.

[651] Oh, that's hilarious.

[652] Because he's like going, he's going to look.

[653] He's like, am I bleeding?

[654] I go, I don't know where the makeup starts and what's blood.

[655] I don't know what's right.

[656] Is that just going to swell them?

[657] A fucking can of soda to the head.

[658] That's hard.

[659] And then I'm not going to, he may or may not, it looked like he was doing some sort of stimulant after that too.

[660] Because it's, you know.

[661] No, were you worried about your safety where this was all happening?

[662] Yeah, I, once I got in, yeah, you know, and by the way, I'm no stranger to hijinks.

[663] You know, I'm...

[664] Says the man who lit the Tonight Show couch on fire.

[665] You know, my wife says, I have good ideas and bad ideas, and I don't know the difference.

[666] It's just ideas, and I treat them with enthusiasm.

[667] I may or may not have lit a quarter stick of dynamite in my backyard when I lived up in the...

[668] I think it's a half a stick.

[669] It was like...

[670] A half a stick?

[671] Yeah, and it blew up this wall.

[672] watermelon that shot all the way like three floors up it was that story goes and it gets kind of gory but i digress so i'm no stranger so like something explodes and and and uh and my wife goes set an m80 and i'm like no that's that's dynamite so i go up and i'm like hey where's my party people no i actually did a fine set there by the way crowd was you know one o 'clock i hit the stage they like the tenacity.

[673] If you can actually hang, they're there.

[674] And I, you know, my oldest brother was a biker.

[675] So I'm kind of familiar with the kind of outlaw behavior.

[676] It's never that, you know, freaky to me. And it seems like it's sort of an agreed -upon thing at this sort of a place.

[677] If you're going to hang out with a bunch of people that are partying, they're calling themselves a juggalo's.

[678] You know, some soda's going to fly through the air.

[679] It's going to be some craziness.

[680] Right.

[681] You can't get mad about soda.

[682] But up to the point of violence.

[683] But what you, the problem is, is if there is no, there's no law.

[684] Right.

[685] It's a little Lord of the Flies.

[686] Yeah.

[687] Like some dude, they thought he was stealing, so they physically, I don't know what happened to him, but they tore his car apart.

[688] Like, just dismantled it.

[689] Whoa.

[690] Yeah.

[691] So it's a little, a little Lord of the Flies.

[692] Yeah.

[693] I mean, I would.

[694] And I got paid in a plastic trash bag full of 20s.

[695] Really?

[696] That's actually kind of badass.

[697] Yeah.

[698] Yeah, and then the cops are just at the lip, just taking people to jail.

[699] They had a bus.

[700] So we pull out.

[701] Right.

[702] And the cops are going, what's going on?

[703] I go, look, I got a bag full of money.

[704] My name's Bobcat Goldstein.

[705] I'm a comedian.

[706] I was big in the 80s.

[707] You know, they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know.

[708] Nothing weird.

[709] You guys, whatever you want to do, I'm completely straight.

[710] And they actually found that really funny.

[711] That is funny.

[712] So they were looking for people to be drunk.

[713] And then they'd open up my bag of money and they're like, you know, I should do comedy.

[714] You know, and they're all busting my chops.

[715] But, yeah.

[716] Were they looking for drunk drivers or?

[717] Oh, just people high out of their minds.

[718] Anything.

[719] I mean, they were just popping everybody that pulled out of the street there.

[720] I like what you said about the, about it being like a community and there's a lot of positive things to that.

[721] There is.

[722] So, I mean, like, I tell this story and I laugh and stuff.

[723] But was it any different than when I went to see the almond brothers with my brother Tommy and he was tripping on acid?

[724] And his brother, big, his brother, biker, who's still alive, Big Mitch, who is a green beret, and we're going to see the almond brothers.

[725] And he suddenly thinks everybody going into the concert is Charlie.

[726] Oh, my God.

[727] It was the best ever.

[728] What year was this?

[729] Probably like 78.

[730] Oh, my God.

[731] And I'm just like, oh.

[732] And, you know, sometimes when things go crazy, that's the other thing about me. during mayhem and chaos, I'm actually super calm.

[733] It's because you've been around it so many times.

[734] No, but like everyday life will flip me out.

[735] Like you're talking earlier, the line in the post office, I can't handle correctly.

[736] I get upset and stuff.

[737] But mayhem, I get really calm.

[738] Really?

[739] Yeah, like a deer jumped out in front of us when we're up in Willa Creek, and I just said, my wife, I go, just stopped the car.

[740] She goes, what are you think I'm doing?

[741] I get all Zen, Daddy.

[742] I don't know.

[743] That's pretty funny.

[744] That's better than the other way.

[745] Yeah, yeah.

[746] But I know what you're talking about, freaking out about lines and stuff like that.

[747] If you can't just stand still and relax, you know, like in a line and then they're nice and slow, it's probably like an ADHD thing, right?

[748] When people are actually really freaking out.

[749] Well, it's the, it's the, you know, the 09 calls me a missing throw.

[750] And I think that is not correct, because I think what upsets me is I actually kind of have, I think, I try to think the best.

[751] I really do.

[752] Even though I make movies where I'm shooting people and, you know, and all these weird things, I do kind of give people the benefit of the doubt.

[753] I truly do.

[754] When she said that, she goes, you're a misanthrope.

[755] And I said, you only say that because you're a person.

[756] And she's always afraid that I'm going off the grid because at night she calls it.

[757] the uh my lake porn like she comes in and said what are you looking at it's just me looking at like look at this 80 acres on a lake yeah it's got its own own it's going creek oh are you looking at like houses gonna get the generator going oh yeah go off the grid dude you and me I think about that shit all the time off the grid just just squatch all day just squatching just set up a few gifting boxes now you went squatching yeah I went for this new show I'm doing is it did you start it?

[758] Yeah, the show started air.

[759] It starts air in July 16th on the sci -fi channel.

[760] It's called Joe Rogan Questions Everything.

[761] And one of them is Bigfoot.

[762] I've had a bigfoot fascination since I was a little kid.

[763] When I was a little kid, I was camping in the Pacific Northwest with my stepdad.

[764] And there's a dude who was up there who was a trapper.

[765] And he had like animal skins and shit.

[766] He was killing animals, like bobcats, which I didn't think was kind of creepy at the time.

[767] I think that's really creepy.

[768] Well, it was only seven.

[769] No, no, I meant me. and he told me about all these people have had these Bigfoot experiences up there and the way he was describing it I barely remember it's like a really whispery memory but I remember that's what started me off on then I was always into monsters and shit when I was a little kid I loved horror movies so then I started reading up on Bigfoot and then I watched the Patterson footage eventually I saw In Search of Bigfoot In Search of is the one that turns everybody around Did you see Boggy Creek?

[770] that was...

[771] Yeah, yeah, I saw it.

[772] So that, that, I think that had a...

[773] Boggy Creek, I didn't go back and revisit it, but I think that movie probably had a lot to do with my movie, Willow Creek, actually.

[774] I got addicted to that show, finding Bigfoot, too.

[775] If you watched that a lot of all?

[776] Sure, sure, sure.

[777] Actually, Cliff and Bobo showed up.

[778] I showed the movie up.

[779] I went back up.

[780] Oh, yeah?

[781] I showed it to the folks that are in it because, you know, a lot of actual folks from the Bigfoot community are in the movie.

[782] I mean, and, and, and how, How can we sell this movie?

[783] I mean, I'm just starting to play...

[784] Without saying anything about it?

[785] Well, I'm just started playing festivals.

[786] The thing that I'm really happy is Bigfoot folks seem to really like it.

[787] Like Cliff said this is the best Bigfoot movie he's ever seen.

[788] Listen, this is a great horror fun movie.

[789] It's a great fun movie.

[790] Yeah.

[791] But I say really true to Bigford.

[792] I try not to be cheesy.

[793] Oh, no. I didn't want those guys to know like that.

[794] I don't want to talk too much about this movie because I don't want to give any of it away because I want people to see it.

[795] It's...

[796] It's you or me?

[797] I think it's...

[798] Oh, can I tell you one quick story?

[799] Yeah, sure.

[800] I'm having a blast.

[801] Thanks for having me on.

[802] Oh, please.

[803] Thanks for being on.

[804] I'm having a blast, too.

[805] So you've got that American Werewolf in London, which I love that movie.

[806] Yeah, me too.

[807] So that blew my mind and I saw it.

[808] Now, where did you get that?

[809] Is that from...

[810] There's a guy named Pat McGee.

[811] He's a special effects guy, and he designs...

[812] If you go to McGeefx .com, he designs a couple different things like he does an alien.

[813] from the movie Alien, and he just reconstructs life -sized replicas.

[814] It's crazy.

[815] Yeah, he just got a mold, and he uses yak hair, and it's an incredible detail.

[816] Well, one of the many, I don't know if you ever heard this myth, but one of the many myths about the Patterson Gimlin footage is that it's John Landis in the suit.

[817] Have you ever heard that?

[818] No, I haven't heard that.

[819] Okay, so I've heard this, and I thought, and so one morning, and I love American Werewolf, I love John Land, Animal House, and all that stuff.

[820] Yeah, me too.

[821] John Lannis is brilliant, but I don't know him.

[822] So I get a hair up my ass, and I'm like, oh, I got to get to the bottom of this.

[823] So I shoot my agent an email and I say, got this idea for a TV show for John Lannis myself, total lie.

[824] I said, can you get him his email?

[825] And so she gets me his email.

[826] So I write him an email, and I'm going to read it to you because he and I had this exchange.

[827] And I say, hi, John.

[828] I'm writing an article about the Patterson Gimlin footage.

[829] I'm not.

[830] I was just lying.

[831] Thank God he's a nice guy.

[832] And was wondering, would you be kind enough to let me interview?

[833] Okay, so I go on and on, and I say, I want to clear up the rumors that John Chambers made the suit and that you were wearing it.

[834] So quickly, I get this email back.

[835] Dear Bobcat, I am definitely not the guy in the Bigfoot suit in the Patterson Gimlet footage.

[836] What publication are you writing an article for?

[837] How did you get my email address?

[838] That's funny But I sent him back And we went back and forth And he was really cool actually I think he's probably tired Of answering that question Yeah I'm sure One of his early He did a great movie It's like It's called Schlock Where he's in a gorilla suit You've probably seen it Is it like a gorilla with a space helmet on No And it's a kind of famous image and it's him directing the movie I love the in the guerrilla suit with the space element Yeah I like Because I got a great I love this There's a photo of me Directing Shakespeare the clown in a clown suit And I just I'll never be in something I direct again You know And I'm like fucking you know I'm like dead serious And everyone's laughing And I look like such an asshole With no sense of humor And fucking clown suit So it's called schlock Schlock yeah Never heard of it Yeah let me double check But yeah It is called Schlock But so I'm a big fan I wasn't coming from, again, yeah, Schlock, I wasn't coming from a big snarky place.

[839] I sincerely fan of Landis and stuff.

[840] But I thought there's a lot of Bigfoot rumors that I kind of thought, well, maybe I can use, you know, my connections, not that I have connections, but, you know, I could disprove some of the things, you know, like get into the John Chambers suit.

[841] You know, John Chambers is the guy who was in Argo who did the Planet of the Apes.

[842] You know, there's a rumor that he may have built the suit, and he did make a big foot, but his big foot I've seen, and it's uh you know so so whatever it is a rabbit hole well it's a rabbit hole but it's also a rabbit hole where a guy says he did it his name's bob heronymous he walks just like that he took a lie detector test and passed he also was a con man so was robert patterson and robert patterson also went to jail for writing a bad check to pay for the very camera that filmed that footage yes and he could go even deeper actually yeah the con man look my thing about my belief in the Patterson footage, it boils down to the gate.

[843] It really does.

[844] It boils down to that knee and that leg.

[845] You've been listening to a bunch of knuckleheads, trust me. That's a guy in a monkey suit.

[846] Let's play it.

[847] Let's play it.

[848] We'll go over it.

[849] It's a guy with a football pad football shoulder pads on it in a gorilla suit.

[850] Explain to me this.

[851] I'm not confronting you.

[852] I know.

[853] But why, this is just a more, this isn't like proof, but this is a weird thing.

[854] Why did they go to the trouble to give it breast.

[855] There's a stabilized one.

[856] There's a stabilized one.

[857] It's better.

[858] Why did they...

[859] That was Abraham Zapruder who shot that too.

[860] There's one look.

[861] There's a couple things.

[862] If you notice, I want people to pay attention when you watch this video.

[863] Why does it have breasts?

[864] That to me is the weirdest thing.

[865] Why doesn't it have breasts?

[866] But if they couldn't make a suit like that in that time and why would they take the extra thing?

[867] There wasn't four -way stretch fabric that looked like fur at that point.

[868] I'm not sure if that's entirely true.

[869] You could listen to a lot of knuckleheads.

[870] And I also think that it's ridiculous to say, why would they make...

[871] Joe, Joe, that looks like a man in a fucking monkeys.

[872] You've been listening to a lot of dingbats.

[873] That's what you've been.

[874] Yeah, you wackadoo, you.

[875] Look at it, move.

[876] That is a man. That is not a man. That is not compelling to me. That looks like it's a man. Are you serious?

[877] Yeah, the gate looks like a dude with a big load in his pants.

[878] He's wearing a diaper.

[879] He's got football shoulder pads on.

[880] It's all fucked up stupid outfit.

[881] And I think you're looking at it from, you know, the problem is, here's the problem.

[882] I can mind fuck myself.

[883] The problem is if we play it back over again, I go, that's fucking real.

[884] Yeah, man, look at the calf.

[885] I'll look at his ass.

[886] Back it up a little bit.

[887] Let's watch it again.

[888] I'll try to, I'm going to try to mind fuck myself now.

[889] Here, I'm going to mind fuck myself.

[890] Oh, my God, I think it's real.

[891] Now, let's see if I can mind fuck myself.

[892] When it goes back and forth like that, that's only, you got to play yakety sacks.

[893] Look at that.

[894] Penny Hill goes out and slaps.

[895] Get it, walk.

[896] Let's zoom and stabilize on the Bigfoot.

[897] That's a kind of monkey suit.

[898] I wish I could mind fuck myself, but I can't.

[899] I try, but it looks so stupid.

[900] I think it's so funny to you that you look at that.

[901] It's like he's got slightly longer hands, like he's probably got some artificial hands in the suit.

[902] And if you watch this, look up Bob Hieronymus, Bigfoot walking.

[903] There's some footage of him split screen with Bob Hieronymus walking on one side of screen and the Sasquatch.

[904] And God damn it, Bob Heronimus was a big, gangly Sasquatch -looking motherfucker.

[905] Let's take a look.

[906] And he passed a lie detector test.

[907] Yeah, but that's not the hell at all right.

[908] Yeah, but I mean, when the guy walks like a duck and quacks like a duck.

[909] He told the story so many times he started believing it.

[910] It's possible.

[911] You might have O .J. Simpson, the whole thing.

[912] I think you can do that to you.

[913] I believe it 100%.

[914] 100%.

[915] You believe what?

[916] That you can convince yourself.

[917] Sure.

[918] My memory of my childhood is so goddamn foggy.

[919] You know, I could go one way or another way and start.

[920] telling a story about it one way, and then by the time I get 10 years down the line, I don't even fucking remember what really happened.

[921] Your childhood is so bananas.

[922] Now, do you spend time trying to piece it together, or do you move past it?

[923] What do you mean?

[924] Well, I mean, it's pretty nuts, the moving around, and I've heard you talk about it in the past.

[925] The moving around was nuts, but the really nutty thing was the martial arts.

[926] Competing and going and competing in martial arts tournaments throughout my high school years, that was the nuttiest thing, because I was a child, and I was having my martial arts.

[927] martial arts competitions against grown men.

[928] Wow.

[929] My instructor was crazy.

[930] And he made me fight grown men when I was 15.

[931] So, like, from the time when I was 15 until I was 21, all I did was full -contact martial arts tournaments.

[932] That was way scarier than anything.

[933] It was almost like I was so scared of growing up and I was so scared of being an adult and I was so scared of just interacting with people and fitting in any place because I was always the new kid and always moving.

[934] I was so scared of fitting in that I just decided to do something way harder than that so i didn't have to think about that i try to do the most obscure crazy scary thing to me well why did it's really weird uh not it's it's kind of sad to hear this too it's not sad it worked out great well it's sad as if i had to go back and be myself as a child was often sad as a child but ultimately it worked out you know i mean it's not sad to go through tough experiences and develop character i don't think that's sad you know i mean i can't i there's a lot of people people who came on a lot worse than me like I was fine the comedy come about that's the part the comedy came about from uh gallows humor from going to tournaments I used to make my friends laugh in the locker room and I would make my friends laugh like on buses and planes and shit I would be the guy who was like trying to crack the ice because we were all terrified and I wasn't insecure around them like the guys that I trained with it was the probably the first time of my life I felt confident enough to like talk out about things and say and make joke about things not to get told to shut the fuck up or someone's going to kick my ass or you know that's what a lot of one moving from town to town when you're the new kid it's like you always have to defend yourself you're always dealing with the local bully and it's like it was a constant thing so when i started doing martial arts like this guys all knew me so i was comfortable around them so then i would make fun of shit to sort of lighten attention because everybody was scared because when you go to tournaments it was just fear the bus was still with fear and everyone's scared weighing in is scary and then every now and then one of us would get knocked the fuck out you get head kicked and you deal with your friend just got concussed in the thing that you do for zero money go back in the bus go back in the bus got ice pack on his head black eyes and shit is common parents are around you call the family they were all adults I was the only child wow yeah until you know some kids came along when I was like 19 and 20 there was some kids that joined up there was like 17 and 18 but for the longest time I was really young did you have any social life did you zero zero no party in no drinking no nothing I had a couple friends from high school and my best friends actually went to the school that was the other school and what about what about women did you have girlfriends at all yeah yeah I had a girlfriend almost ruined me my first girlfriend because as soon as they're starting having sex I just didn't want to train anymore I was like it was like why would I go do that this is way more fun does everybody know about this yeah it's ridiculous it's like this sex is way better than martial arts getting my face punched yeah having my name nose shoved into my brain.

[935] Yeah, it was always...

[936] All right, so, well, we were talking about Patterson before I suddenly became a shrink on you.

[937] I think if you, it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a duck.

[938] Okay, so I want you to watch this.

[939] This is Bob Hieronymus walking and then the Bigfoot.

[940] Bob looking, turning just like the Bigfoot, I mean, come on, man. Put that guy in a goddamn monkey suit.

[941] Yeah, I don't think it's a mistake that the knees aren't shown here.

[942] Honestly, I mean, if you look at the knees and the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, The way the calf goes up.

[943] You ever walk with ice kates on?

[944] Yeah.

[945] But you know how ice kates don't bend right?

[946] And you have to pick them up and make like an exaggerated walking motion.

[947] What the big foot looks like to me is like a dude with like a suit on.

[948] It's got like crazy feet on the suit and he has to walk a certain way because they don't bend.

[949] You know what's funny.

[950] I'm not giving way too much about the movie, but there's there is footprints in the movie.

[951] Yeah.

[952] You shouldn't even say that.

[953] You shouldn't have said that.

[954] Oh, really?

[955] Yeah, stop.

[956] Stop right now.

[957] Okay.

[958] Make people, because there's so much about this movie that's so badass.

[959] If your movie sucked, I'd let you keep talking.

[960] But your movie's too good.

[961] Thanks, right.

[962] You'd let me shoot myself in the foot.

[963] Don't do it, God damn it.

[964] Don't do it.

[965] So I'm just here to plug hot to trot tonight?

[966] It would be beautiful if a guy who's a con man just happened to be the first guy to actually see Bigfoot and film it.

[967] It would be fascinating.

[968] Well, don't you feel that way about being a comedian?

[969] Now, you went out, and where did you go?

[970] We went to the Pacific Northwest, but we're not going to fake anything.

[971] No, no, no, but I mean, but if you find something, they're going to, oh, it's Joe Rogan, you know.

[972] Yeah, no, absolutely.

[973] That's how I feel about it.

[974] Like, like, I'm going up to Oregon with a, and talking to Cliff, and we're going to go out.

[975] But I also feel like I taint it, you know, the idea that, you know, if we find anything.

[976] I don't think so.

[977] I think if you, you're just like me and I think your, you're feeling about it is genuine, you know, I think it's a fascinating subject.

[978] It's very possible that it's bullshit, but it's also very possible that it's not.

[979] Let's throw it all out and say it's, it is fake.

[980] Okay.

[981] What is it about the subconscious through thousands of years that people continually see in these things?

[982] I mean, why is it, you know, and Teddy Roosevelt tells a story of a, you know, why does it keep showing up finish that.

[983] Teddy Roosevelt told a story in his book about a camp that he was out where a guy killed a wild man or a wild man killed a man. Yeah, yeah.

[984] And everything was destroyed.

[985] But so like all these stories that keep showing up, I'm interested too in that.

[986] Like what is it in part of our subconscious?

[987] What part of why did these archetypal characters keep showing up that happens to be a man in the woods?

[988] It's going to be as simply as keep your kids away from bears or is it something bigger?

[989] Or is it a 800 -pound wood ape?

[990] I mean, you know, it's all fascinating.

[991] There's so many different things to consider when you say something like that.

[992] It was like, first of all, you have to consider that it's probably a conglomeration of a bunch of things.

[993] And one of those things being that everyone's afraid of the unknown.

[994] And when you look out into that dark woods and you just say, what the fuck is out there?

[995] This is what you said that.

[996] I started getting creeped out for the first time, by the way.

[997] And I was in the woods a little 17 miles down a dirt road.

[998] You know, 11 hours from L .A. North.

[999] Then we go to Willow Creek.

[1000] Then you drive about 40 minutes to Orleans.

[1001] Then you drive up this road.

[1002] Then we drive two and a half hours down a 17 -mile dirt road to get to the location.

[1003] So there's no phones.

[1004] There's no planes going over.

[1005] So two mountain lions.

[1006] Whoa.

[1007] Two mountain lions.

[1008] And I put the actors in the tent in that scene, and they're going, hey, man, why are we here?

[1009] Man, we could do this in a parking lot.

[1010] That's true.

[1011] That's so true.

[1012] But they couldn't.

[1013] No, because it was, you know.

[1014] It feels fucking real.

[1015] There's nothing about, don't say anymore, God damn it.

[1016] You just said some shit.

[1017] All right.

[1018] Motherfucker, stop talking about it.

[1019] But it is, I am happy that people like it, that it is scary, that there's laughs.

[1020] And it was the most fun I had making a movie.

[1021] Going down a dark road and getting into the woods of the Pacific Northwest, it will give you this new appreciation of how ridiculously, why, that area is yeah like the idea that we have an accurate account did you get like a buzz when you start the like from the trees yeah there is right or am i no no no there's a feeling moon beam i mean well they they they're their energy yeah and you get trees are alive but the oxygen that they make you get you get like this weird buzz i was not frightened everybody else was kind of frightened um and and i was just like i i i i didn't realize this about myself i just i just like drop my trow.

[1022] I'm walking around in my underwear, jumping in the river.

[1023] Is that where you want to get a lakehouse?

[1024] Yeah, or even I'm fine with a river now.

[1025] You're squatching.

[1026] That's what you're doing.

[1027] You want to go up there and go squatching.

[1028] I just, yeah, man. And I don't want to dis, I don't, I'm not a prepper.

[1029] I don't like that attitude.

[1030] I really don't.

[1031] Because it's like I don't like these preppers.

[1032] It's like this weird end of times or Christian Judeo BS that they're buying into.

[1033] Do you know what I mean?

[1034] The world, if we've learned anything about the world, It's not going to go out with one big bang, you know.

[1035] It's just like, you know, things are going to fall apart, but it's not going to be anarchy.

[1036] I don't know why so many people in every movie is about, you know, a Scientologist saving the world.

[1037] I think we've been through several of those in history.

[1038] I think we're better at understanding it now because we have the written word and we have history and we have all these different stories of the past of civilizations that have deteriorated back when people didn't really have access to books and novels.

[1039] It's some weird sort of hopelessness that's that's, that's just, and I don't, I don't buy it.

[1040] I don't, I don't, I think, I think, I think human beings are so resilient and, uh, or there is the carlin bit, you know, maybe, maybe the earth need plastic, you know, like, as a, that's funny, as a species, I mean, um, I think that we probably will carry on, but it's really easily conceivable that some natural disaster could happen that could wipe out most of the, of the population of Earth.

[1041] All you need is one big Yucatan -sized meteor that hits.

[1042] True.

[1043] And we're done.

[1044] And there's hundreds of thousands of those floating around, not like three of them.

[1045] But I'm not, I think I'm more of an optimist.

[1046] I think when you just prep and decide to go underground, I want to go out in the woods because I like, I like the quiet, I like the smells, I like.

[1047] It's beautiful.

[1048] Yeah.

[1049] But everybody else with me was just completely flipped out of their minds like this intern.

[1050] And there's this is a tiny crew And he's like Hey man What's the difference between a Bobcat And where did you see these mountains?

[1051] In a mountain line We said two of them Where did you see that?

[1052] One in Willow Creek Just walking across the street And then one Were you in a car or were you driving?

[1053] We were in a car for the one But the other one was right where we were filming And And he goes Hey man Bobcat and a mountain line What's the difference?

[1054] I go Bobcat's stocky And you know He's got like a short tail And a mountain line's tall And he's got a long tail He's like Yeah I saw a mountain line And I go, where?

[1055] And I'm like, I'm like, you know, this is like a, I'm Werner Herzog making Fitzcarraldo.

[1056] I'm like, out of my mind.

[1057] And I go, where?

[1058] And he goes, to the left.

[1059] I go, to the right, fellas, you know, just.

[1060] There's a real problem with them not allowing them to hunt mountain lines anymore.

[1061] Well, mountain lines I'd found out later on are badass.

[1062] They're scary.

[1063] Well, well, here's the thing.

[1064] They're cats.

[1065] Yeah.

[1066] So if you run, you're a 200 -pound mouse.

[1067] You know what I mean?

[1068] It's just going to take you down.

[1069] Yeah.

[1070] Well, they go after people on bikes for that.

[1071] very reason they can't they can't help themselves it's a mouse yeah and so like it's you on a bike with a light as a laser pointer and so so I was like how close were you he goes about five feet oh and if you've ever seen them by the way um because the one I did see and I have big balls I was in a car but the one I saw was huge it's a lion and they just walk and they're he was walking with a purpose across the road like like I'm sure he's about to eat something.

[1072] It's a real problem.

[1073] California's banned hunting of them.

[1074] Really?

[1075] In some places, it banned use of dogs.

[1076] You need dogs to hunt them because otherwise you'll never find them.

[1077] But what happens to the dogs?

[1078] I mean...

[1079] The dogs bathe them.

[1080] They bark, they get them up a tree and then the person comes along and shoots them.

[1081] Sometimes dogs get attacked, though.

[1082] Yeah, that's the part of that story.

[1083] I'm not so...

[1084] I'm not so happy about that either, but...

[1085] No, when you went in the woods, did you have a gun?

[1086] There was a guy with us who had a gun.

[1087] Yeah, everybody kept saying, oh, you got a gun?

[1088] You should have a gun around Mountain winds.

[1089] I know.

[1090] I know.

[1091] Now you know.

[1092] Now I know.

[1093] We had a ranger with us.

[1094] He's also, he's a Bigfoot, Robert Lederman, he's a ranger, and he's a, I'd say, a bigfoot enthusiast.

[1095] He's a really sweet guy.

[1096] Huge help on the movie, actually.

[1097] And, you know, it's like three, four in the morning.

[1098] And he's like, you know, I'm a writer too.

[1099] And I go, oh, really?

[1100] I go, what do you write?

[1101] He goes, you know, Twilight?

[1102] I go, yeah.

[1103] I write a tween novel set in the Bigfoot world.

[1104] It's a coming of age story, like Twilight.

[1105] So two Bigfoot hunters fall in love?

[1106] Young, young Bigfoot.

[1107] A young Bigfoot.

[1108] Falls in love with a person?

[1109] No, no, people fall in love in the world.

[1110] I go, what's the name?

[1111] He's like, Yetty or not?

[1112] And at this point, yeah.

[1113] Yeah, and I'm like, I go, this is my air hose.

[1114] You're like, this guy is the only thing keeping me alive tonight.

[1115] Yetty or not, oh, my God.

[1116] I was very, I was very happy that he liked the movie.

[1117] Again, you know, these were the folks.

[1118] In the community.

[1119] Yeah, Stephen Stufford up in Bigfoot books.

[1120] You saw that in the movie.

[1121] This is the last thing I'm going to say about it.

[1122] The howl.

[1123] The howl was very authentic.

[1124] It's like I've heard the sounds that they supposedly connect with the howl.

[1125] Well, that's the thing.

[1126] Like, you listen to that stuff, too.

[1127] Okay, let's forget the Patterson Gimling footage, but there's so much stuff.

[1128] Oh, no, no, no. I don't think there's no evidence that Bigfoot exists, and I don't think that Bigfoot doesn't exist.

[1129] I think that...

[1130] The Patterson Gimmel's footage.

[1131] The guys are coaxer.

[1132] A guy's a bullshit artist.

[1133] I met people when I was up in the Pacific Northwest that knew the...

[1134] Patterson and knew the other dude, too.

[1135] Bob Gimmon.

[1136] Heronmus.

[1137] Oh, oh.

[1138] Heronimus, the guy wore the suit.

[1139] And they said, those guys were bullshit artists.

[1140] They're always trying to make money, and they'd been trying to do it for a long time.

[1141] They'd had someone else make a suit.

[1142] They had had to someone else make a suit and it didn't work And so they had this in it Who made that suit then?

[1143] The fuck knows But you know what?

[1144] That suit is an amazing suit for that time It's not that good Here's the problem Everybody, this is one of them Everybody wants to say that it's really good But here's what's realistic It's blurry as fuck So you're not getting a real accurate Crisp version of what you're seeing You're getting this smushy version of it And so everybody wants to attribute it to muscles And this movement to like There's no design, no costume like that I would buy that if you would show me a high resolution crystal clear video of what we're looking at.

[1145] But you're looking at blurry trees.

[1146] The trees look blurry as fuck.

[1147] You can't make out the very specific branches or the texture of the bark.

[1148] So what you're looking at when you're saying that it looks so good, you're looking at this blurry thing.

[1149] That might be tits.

[1150] That might be a flaw in the costume.

[1151] That might be his ass.

[1152] Or it might be a, he's wearing a fucking diaper under a gorilla suit.

[1153] I'm leaving.

[1154] No. I think...

[1155] Pull it up again.

[1156] Let's watch it one more time.

[1157] I want to get back to the breast.

[1158] Stabilized.

[1159] I always think that's very weird.

[1160] It's weird, but it's not impossible to fake tits.

[1161] It's not.

[1162] In Los Angeles.

[1163] Well, here's the thing.

[1164] Okay, how about this?

[1165] Maybe they would feel like Bigfoot is way larger than a person.

[1166] So you just pretend to be a female Bigfoot.

[1167] Because Bob Hieronymus is 6 '5.

[1168] He's too small to be a Sasquoise.

[1169] So they give him tits.

[1170] That's way more likely than they film Bigfoot.

[1171] Right?

[1172] It's way more likely.

[1173] All right, but you say that.

[1174] Now, what big foot do you, what evidence do you buy then?

[1175] There's a lot of things that are interesting.

[1176] First of all, the footprints with the dermal ridges.

[1177] That's fascinating because that's incredibly difficult to fake.

[1178] See, I'm looking at that, man. You know, there's...

[1179] That's so blurry.

[1180] Look how blurry everything is.

[1181] It's all washed out.

[1182] Look at that tree.

[1183] You don't know what the fuck that tree really looks like.

[1184] You can't see shit.

[1185] You can't see anything.

[1186] Well, this is a bad version.

[1187] But this is the best version you can get, man. It's just blown up.

[1188] When you're looking at it, you're looking at it.

[1189] everything in the distance.

[1190] So you want?

[1191] You want him shot on red?

[1192] No, I'm saying it looks like shit.

[1193] Colvax to be the D .P.?

[1194] Dude, be honest.

[1195] Look at the trees you're looking at in front of Bigfoot.

[1196] Look at the trees in front of him.

[1197] You can't even see any definition of has trees.

[1198] They're in meal penalties right now.

[1199] And Bigfoot says...

[1200] Be honest.

[1201] Patty says, I'm out of here.

[1202] Show him one more time.

[1203] That looks real to me. Jesus Christ, you're crazy.

[1204] One more time.

[1205] Look at what you're looking at.

[1206] You're looking at incredibly blurry shit.

[1207] You're looking at.

[1208] incredibly blurry trees that are all washed out and everyone trying to attribute all this musculature and definition you barely know what you're looking at here why does this hold up so much it doesn't but why look at you and I right now it doesn't hold up it's just a full film that has not been authenticated or refuted it just hasn't been because science hasn't really spent any fucking time examining it what about in Russia goddamn bigfoot What, the Yeti in Russia?

[1209] No, no. The Russians spent a lot of time examining that.

[1210] Examinating that?

[1211] Yes, yes.

[1212] Well, they were fucking with us, okay?

[1213] It's ridiculous.

[1214] Like, yeah, it's still living it's real.

[1215] Let them waste their time.

[1216] So, waste their time on this monkey.

[1217] So, what evidence then, if you're so opposed?

[1218] Derma ridges are fascinating.

[1219] That's fascinating.

[1220] The Melba Ketchum DNA is fascinating.

[1221] Really?

[1222] In fact, on the show, we just had a geneticist go over that.

[1223] Yeah, but that's the stuff that people are calling BS on.

[1224] It could be, but the deal is, though, This guy was a geneticist that overlooked the data, and it was his conclusion based on his understanding of genetics.

[1225] He was an accomplished geneticist.

[1226] But not published in any real thing other than their own.

[1227] No, that's because they couldn't get published.

[1228] We are so far down there.

[1229] No, it's a good thing to say.

[1230] That's a better footage.

[1231] This is like, this is when the 09 checks out.

[1232] No, it's a fascinating subject.

[1233] I don't know if she's correct or wrong, this Melba -Catcham woman, or if it's a hoax.

[1234] But when a geneticist says that he finds the information to be compelling, then I have to listen because I'm too fucking stupid to understand who's right or who's wrong.

[1235] Now, did you ever see any of the story of Jimmy Stewart with the Yeti finger?

[1236] Jimmy Stewart?

[1237] Jimmy Stewart smuggled what was supposed to be a Yetty finger out of the Himalayas and his wife's underwear.

[1238] It wasn't in her pants.

[1239] But, I mean, in her underwear.

[1240] Honey, you're going to have to keep this in your pussy.

[1241] This is important.

[1242] It's a Yeti finger.

[1243] You think it's hard getting weed on it.

[1244] It needs to be moist.

[1245] No, it was in her underwear drawer, and they got it all the way to England.

[1246] Now, that has been proven not to be a Yetty finger.

[1247] What was it?

[1248] I can't remember, but I remember that.

[1249] Let's look it up.

[1250] It had DNA testing done to it.

[1251] Jimmy Stewart, a Yeti finger results.

[1252] But I, you know, you know what really works for me. is a lot of the audio recordings.

[1253] Well, obviously, because you were talking about that in the movie, and that is what works for me, is, you know, I love listening to them.

[1254] I think it's funny, you were talking about UFOs, I think it's funny, it's like people will go, well, where's the footage?

[1255] Yeah.

[1256] Well, there's a ton of footage on UFOs now that you can't wrap your brain around.

[1257] Yeah, okay, here's something interesting about the Yeti finger.

[1258] They said the DNA tusks have found it to be a human bone.

[1259] Well, here's what's interesting.

[1260] Jimmy Stewart's wife smuggled A human bone But they think that these things are fucking human It doesn't mean that that's wrong The people that I thought that they thought That this was like some sort of like A rangatang giant orangutan thing But no They think it's like That that Hobbit That Homo Flores You're aware of that The little tiny man That they found the island of Flores That was a human Yeah well that's that's You know the Native Americans Up in the Pacific Northwest It's just, you know, some of the tribes just attributed the Sasquatch as another tribe.

[1261] I mean, it wasn't, you know.

[1262] Jesus.

[1263] Now, have you gone down this rabbit hole?

[1264] The amount of people who go disappearing in our parks.

[1265] No. There is no federal database set up for people who go missing in the parks.

[1266] And it's, I can't remember the number.

[1267] It's huge.

[1268] There's an author who wrote a book about it.

[1269] It's really fascinating.

[1270] Do they think that these are Yetis or?

[1271] He doesn't even go down that road.

[1272] He just says, why is it, it's a, we should look it up.

[1273] I don't know what the number, he's saying, who, what is this, why isn't there?

[1274] And where are all these people gone?

[1275] I can't, I feel really bad for bringing up this enough.

[1276] Well, it's usually they could starve to death.

[1277] I mean, you get lost in the woods.

[1278] And you could get lost easily.

[1279] But the weird part is the Fed's not taking the time to have a database.

[1280] I actually have a friend whose dad died in the woods.

[1281] He went hiking And then the fog rolled in And he got trapped Eventually, yeah Oh Yeah I think they didn't find him For a long time too But you know Once you've been out Out in the woods Like we were What happens to your mind When you were out there That's pretty funny to me Well it's very How late did you stay up?

[1282] Oh we were there We didn't sleep in the woods We decided to stay in a hotel That was in town That was 20 miles away Yeah But just being around there at night.

[1283] When you're in those woods even in the day, when you go into those woods, you're gone.

[1284] We were in Mount Rainier.

[1285] You go into those woods and it's another world.

[1286] First of all, those elk that bound in front of you and they're oh, you know, five, six hundred pound animal just jumping in front of you.

[1287] Yeah, that's weird when you run into animal.

[1288] I saw that up in Willow Creek.

[1289] Elk are huge.

[1290] That aren't afraid of you.

[1291] That's the weird part.

[1292] They don't even know what the fuck you are.

[1293] Yeah.

[1294] Yeah.

[1295] They've never seen one of you They're living in those fucking woods Which was pretty fun Because a couple of guys It was really funny Because we were at Laos camp Which if anybody knows That's really close to that And one of the guys goes Because we had two women The actress and a producer And I never had women here before This is around a camp fire In the middle of the night I go Fellas I'm going to stop you right there That's usually when the raping starts Yeah, you shouldn't even say that Even if it's true Keep that shit to yourself, son No, he's gonna get women out of here Never had women out here So as far as the things that they've collected Like the UFO You know, quote unquote evidence To me, the most interesting shit is the howls That are really insane Primate Howls Yeah And the dermal ridges that they found Terrifying too Like someone was great Like in the middle of the night And it's awesome I was once before the keynote speaker got up one of the guys he mentions there's two guys like an opener you know there's the feature there's the headline right and the MC so basically the feature brings up UFOs while he's doing his big foot pitch and about a third of the room went like oh boy who brought this kook a third of the room was I'm going to take a piss.

[1296] Well, there's people in the Bigfoot community that, like, make fun of wood knockers.

[1297] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1298] They're off there, wood knocking, like, they're just going to wood knock back.

[1299] Come on.

[1300] Well, I said, you know, these guys who are upset if you smoke tobacco around them.

[1301] And, you know, there's people with crying babies and making bacon and, you know.

[1302] Well, the one guy saying to the other guy that you never find Bigfoot because you smoke.

[1303] I've seen Bigfoot three times.

[1304] You're never going to see Bigfoot because you smoke.

[1305] That's fucking, that cuts at a man's soul.

[1306] And I was, like, wondering, like, how does it?

[1307] this guy feel about grass?

[1308] Does he think that Bigfoot's down with grass?

[1309] Bigfoot's probably attracted to weed.

[1310] That's, well, I have noticed that a few of our fellow Sasquatch hunters a little, could possibly be a little baked out there.

[1311] Well, squatching when you're high is probably way more fun than sober squatching.

[1312] In the middle of the night, you know?

[1313] Yes.

[1314] Oh, my God.

[1315] Sober squatching.

[1316] It leaves much to be desired.

[1317] I really think folks can't wrap their brains around how many millions of acres there are still in like California and Oregon and Portland that are completely like a plane goes down and no one finds it.

[1318] I think you're totally right and I think that's one of the things that we tried to capture on the show when we went up into Mount Rainier I was like the way I described the trees I was like it's like a box of Q -tips.

[1319] You know how you get a box of Q -tips and you know they're just shoved in there?

[1320] That's all these trees and like you're not getting through that you're going to get through that guy going like this one step right and one step left and one step right you're going to like slowly have to see saw your way through all these trees.

[1321] Like, this is an incredibly dense rainforest, and there's thousands of square miles, thousands, and you can't just get to the middle of it.

[1322] There's no, there's not trails through all of it.

[1323] So if something was living up there, it could see you come in a fucking mile away, hide from you so easy, especially if it had better senses than us, which if it lives in the woods, it's got to have, like, animal senses, right?

[1324] Sure, of course.

[1325] Probably has senses like a dog does.

[1326] Sure.

[1327] Dogs would be able to hear you and see you coming.

[1328] There's no way a human being, yeah.

[1329] But deer.

[1330] Deer see you coming a mile away.

[1331] They hear you coming a mile away.

[1332] Well, I, so tell me, or you're not trying to talk too much about the show you did.

[1333] Who did you go out with?

[1334] I'm not trying to talk too much about it.

[1335] We went with these guys from Wassert, the Washington State Sasquatch Research Team.

[1336] Was it a blast?

[1337] Did you have a good time?

[1338] Yeah, they were great guys.

[1339] They were hardcore dedicated squatchers, and they took us to, like, some serious spots.

[1340] And we saw some weird shit.

[1341] We saw some trees that were arranged in some really peculiar positions in the middle of the forest.

[1342] I'm nowhere, and you're going.

[1343] We also saw some trees that were broken in the middle, which is really weird, because there's no wind inside this forest.

[1344] You know, you're deep, deep, deep in the forest, and you see trees that are snapped in half seven feet up.

[1345] Like, something grabbed it and snapped it.

[1346] I don't know what the fuck it was.

[1347] I mean, I don't know what happened.

[1348] but it's weird, you know, you see that.

[1349] But to them, that's Squatch.

[1350] That's a sign of Squatch.

[1351] Squatch is marked this to your turd.

[1352] There's an area in Alaska.

[1353] I don't know if you're familiar with it.

[1354] How deep you went with your Bigfoot research.

[1355] I have not gone to Alaska.

[1356] Not if you've gone deep.

[1357] But if you've heard of the trees, the two trees that are uprooted.

[1358] Jamie, see if you can find the photo.

[1359] There's these two trees in Alaska that they believe Bigfoot has uprooted and driven into the ground.

[1360] Not yet.

[1361] I'm doing a gig up there in two weeks.

[1362] Which town?

[1363] I'm doing a gig in Anchorage.

[1364] Yeah.

[1365] Well, the Anchorage is really, it's beautiful.

[1366] But, yeah, maybe that's when I'm going off the grid.

[1367] Yeah, that's great.

[1368] I'm addicted to us.

[1369] At least you're going now.

[1370] I mean, I did two dates in February in Anchorage.

[1371] No. You kind of reassess your career choices the second time you go, hello, Anchorage.

[1372] How cold was it?

[1373] It was so cool, but it's, you know, it's this weird thing.

[1374] There's guys wearing shorts and sneaks because you just go in and out of heated things and it's dry.

[1375] There's like snow places that never goes away and stuff.

[1376] These are those trees.

[1377] They're picked up by their roots and driven into the ground and no one knows how the fuck it was done.

[1378] They know that it wasn't done with heavy equipment because there's no like apparently there's no marks in the trees that correspond to the use of heavy equipment.

[1379] Now what do you think that?

[1380] Allegedly.

[1381] I don't know.

[1382] I mean, here's the thing.

[1383] When you hear these stories, you're hearing about them.

[1384] See if there's any other photos of that, Jamie.

[1385] Better ones.

[1386] I've seen some different ones that are more in detail but you don't know how much you're dealing with is just people that are in love with that shit you know sure but I I you know there's there is there's a cynicism that you can have and then there's the question of what if and you could even be say all this stuff is BS but I do love the the what if right right yeah It's, Jane Goodall thinks they're real.

[1387] Yeah, Jane Goodall, yeah, sure.

[1388] That's legit to me. That's when the 09 gave me shark eyes when I pulled out Jane Goodall.

[1389] Did she really?

[1390] You know, I mean, like, you know, sharks, you know, before they roll back.

[1391] They roll back before they bite.

[1392] She was like, wow.

[1393] Well, people that think it's bullshit and you start pulling out Jane Goodall.

[1394] That's, well, you know, that's, that's, again, the, the 09, she likes to say this.

[1395] movie, Willow Creek, that's what the name of this movie is that we're talking about.

[1396] I can't announce it yet.

[1397] It got into some bigger festivals that'll happen soon.

[1398] How is it not just in the movies?

[1399] I think that you can make a good trailer for the movie, and I think it could open.

[1400] I think it's different than the other movies that may. It's fucking great.

[1401] I would go see that if I was on date.

[1402] That's a great date night movie.

[1403] It's fucking fun.

[1404] It's a fun.

[1405] Look, and obviously I'm very biased because I love you, and I'm a Bigfoot dork, so it was a double combination.

[1406] But I enjoyed the shit out of it, man. Well, thanks, man. Thanks.

[1407] You're welcome.

[1408] You're welcome.

[1409] I am, you know, it's funny.

[1410] I just, you know, I'm starting now to make about a movie a year, different sizes, different budgets, different people.

[1411] And then in the meantime, I do other, I work for other folks, and I do stand -up.

[1412] Like, I'm about to go do Patton's new Comedy Central special.

[1413] I'll direct that.

[1414] Oh, that's great.

[1415] You're directing a stand -up special?

[1416] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1417] Where's he filming that?

[1418] he's going to be a comic con i mean that is really yeah that is that is like if like uh stack the deck yeah exactly that would be like if you were in one of those giant southern uh cathedrals that holds you know the mega churches yeah and then christ actually just came out of the floor like he just showed up that patten that comic com is going to be like i love patten yeah he's brilliant his writing is fucking fun man yeah he's brilliant so so uh that kind of stuff like if i can work with a comic and try to and you know and try to make it easier when they show up so they're not worrying about you know i mean yeah some knuckleheads you know that that that that that makes me really happy that's just a satisfying believe it or not as going out and doing a show oh that's awesome because i yeah because i love comics and i don't i don't i don't like it when people make it harder you know I mean, like, you know, just before you go on, on TV, everybody's saying the worst thing.

[1419] You're going to do good.

[1420] It's like, don't stay.

[1421] The fuck out of here.

[1422] Shut up.

[1423] You're not making me loose.

[1424] Yeah, that's the worst thing ever.

[1425] You know, they're questioning.

[1426] You're going to do good.

[1427] You know, my friend Tony, like.

[1428] Tony V?

[1429] Yeah, so, like, he was on Letterman.

[1430] I love Tony V. So I sent him flowers when he's on Letterman, and it just said, don't fuck this up.

[1431] And then one time he was taping another TV show.

[1432] And it was years ago.

[1433] I go, Tony, I'm coming down there tonight to watch a tape.

[1434] He goes, oh, really don't.

[1435] No, I'm bringing Robin Williams, so don't fuck this up.

[1436] He just thinks you're my friend.

[1437] He doesn't know that you're funny, so really do good.

[1438] He's like, you're a fucking answer.

[1439] And then, of course, you know, you do that to a guy, and they go up and they're laughing.

[1440] Because subconsciously, he's going, well, Bob wouldn't, Bob cat's not going to tell me I'm going to fucking blow.

[1441] You know what I mean?

[1442] So, you need a safety zone.

[1443] You need friends that aren't driving you nuts before you go on.

[1444] What seems like what I like about what you've done with your, you know, I hate the word career, but I guess that's what it is.

[1445] You know, career always seems so formal.

[1446] It's just how you've expressed yourself.

[1447] What I like about it is that you have not boxed yourself into any one corner.

[1448] Like this Bigfoot thing is this fucking freaky horror movie.

[1449] That's why I love it.

[1450] It's like so funny.

[1451] It's like people, you know, the perception and then you make it.

[1452] and it's really fun to watch with an audience.

[1453] But what I was going to say is, but also, like, I'll run into you and you're directing the Chappelle show.

[1454] I ran into you, you're directing Kimmel.

[1455] Yeah, yeah.

[1456] I mean, you're doing all this weird shit, but you're equally competent at all of it, and it seems like you're equally enthusiastic about all of it.

[1457] Yeah, well, thanks.

[1458] It allows you to, like, direct someone's stand -up and enjoy it as much as doing your own stand -up, which you also enjoy.

[1459] Yeah, I'm pretty lucky.

[1460] Now, you know, the other side of it is, is like, it's it's not um it's probably the least secure i've ever been financially but there's something awesome every time you you jump off and you go hey what am i going to do next you know and every time it works out in some hairbrained way you know i mean i gave the commencement speech at my daughter's school at hampshire college you know and i was i really well first i went up and i just read an opera speech word for word you know i went I'm nervous.

[1461] I always go to Oprah and then it was all about making it and I was like blah blah blah dreams and hopes and this doesn't apply to any of you kids you know you got to you guys got to quit as often as possible in life until you end up someplace that you don't want to leave you know and you could smell the parent's stomach acid you know they spent all this money on an education that's so true that's actually amazing advice you know quit as many times as you can until you find something you don't want to leave you know and like there's a weird thing for guys our age I mean you're younger than me but where we we're doing all different things and you know are we enjoying them or not and then all of a sudden this age we come onto our own and it's um the the the freaky part is like after World's Greatest Dad I wrote five screenplays I mean I just write screenplays all the time and someone goes well who are you competing with and I'm like the grim fucking Reaper man I not like sitting looking over at you know who you compete with That's not an interesting question That if you produce anything You create something You're competing against somebody to create it What a shitty mentality But common You know, it's a common thought Yeah, and as soon as you can remove those guys And make it, you know, yourself Instead of other people And you're not judging what you make By their standards and stuff It's a pretty awesome place Yeah, that's a thing about being You know, a grown -ass man too It's like you get to a point where you're comfortable in your own life and you're comfortable with what you do and you know what's good and what you've done, you've had enough feedback by what you've done that you enjoy, what you've done, that you did for money, and then you get to this sort of place where you're like, okay, I know what I'm doing here.

[1462] Yeah, and I'm not on a pink cloud.

[1463] You know, there's gigs I take for the bread and there's things I do, but, you know, it does make it a little easier when you're sitting there, you know, and you're asking, getting, what is your police academy?

[1464] I'm interested in that.

[1465] Like, what does people bring up?

[1466] Fear Factor.

[1467] Fear Factor.

[1468] Okay.

[1469] And you're polite, I'm sure, when people talk about it.

[1470] I enjoyed doing it.

[1471] You know, Fear Factor was nothing, there was nothing artistic about Fear Factor.

[1472] But there was, I had a lot of great moments.

[1473] But there are a couple questions that you've heard a million times, right?

[1474] Oh, yeah.

[1475] And what is it?

[1476] What is the one you get?

[1477] Oh, did you ever eat any of that stuff?

[1478] Hey, Joe, it's Fear Factor for you.

[1479] Yeah, but I have a very healthy attitude about it.

[1480] And, you know, I'm happy that people enjoy the show, you know, and I understand.

[1481] what it would be like if I enjoyed the show and I ran into me, I might say something stupid too.

[1482] I might say, it's true fact of you, buddy.

[1483] Because I wouldn't know what else to say.

[1484] I'm an idiot, you know?

[1485] But you don't detest it.

[1486] We do our best and smile through it.

[1487] But this person doesn't realize they're the third person that stopped me today.

[1488] At the airport.

[1489] And asked me at the airport.

[1490] As you went to your gate.

[1491] No, you know what it is?

[1492] It's always, you know what it is?

[1493] It's the security people.

[1494] When you're taking your belt off?

[1495] Yo, man, where's that movie with that horse at?

[1496] Yo, man, you did that movie with that horse?

[1497] You did the movie with the beer.

[1498] Oh, you did that shit?

[1499] Oh, man. But now it's worse because they go, I don't know.

[1500] They go looking at me, and it's like, I never heard of them.

[1501] Do the voice.

[1502] It's the worst.

[1503] Jimmy Campbell loves to bust my balls harder than anyone about the voice.

[1504] It's just, you know, like if we're doing the show and, you know, during the commercial, I go over the, do the voice.

[1505] I got a trick, you know.

[1506] that's hilarious jimmy went and got a star and that was uh i hadn't seen him in a while so i went and got i went with him while he you know i was very touched he got a star in the hollywood boulevard yeah it was really sweet it was just a real it was a real caprax moment with everybody that guys that i've seen in and out of his life and you know it's really sweet to watch but the oh nine goes you know i tried to get you a star and uh i go what happened they said ma 'am the posthumous request, swear to God, it's another, it's another, it's another, they thought you were dead?

[1507] Yeah, and I said, they were, I go, well, then what did you do?

[1508] She goes, well, I, the guy insisted you were dead, and I said, I'm your wife, and then, and I was like, I would have taken a dead star, I don't care, you know, I would have showed up in, like, gore makeup.

[1509] That would actually be hilarious, but they gave you a star, you're dead, they gave you a star, and then you showed up for the, and they're like, what the fuck is going on?

[1510] It's coming on lower down.

[1511] They're alive.

[1512] In this day and age, I mean, everyone's zombie obsessed.

[1513] Yeah, just coming in gore makeup with maggots coming out of an eye socket.

[1514] She killed me. That would be really funny, man. Especially if you, I mean, sure, you can get somebody in Hollywood to do it up really good.

[1515] Like Walking Dead style where it looked realistic.

[1516] Sure, yeah.

[1517] That would be awesome.

[1518] So I have a question.

[1519] You did this one episode.

[1520] What's the next one?

[1521] Well, we're doing six.

[1522] We were picked up for six.

[1523] It starts July 16th, so there's a similar idea, but what I wanted to do, and this was after shooting Willow Creek, I thought it'd be funny to like go, let's say I go the Jersey Devil, right?

[1524] Right.

[1525] But I make it, because I'm interested in filmmaking, so I get Kevin Smith to go with me in a tent and we go and sleep out and look for the Jersey Devil.

[1526] Yeah, that would be great.

[1527] And then you just keep going, but it's always like, you know, John Waters is Baltimore, and we go.

[1528] and we go find this haunted house in Baltimore again, you know, it just came about.

[1529] What I'm doing is some of them I'm doing with comedians, like I did one with Duncan Trussle.

[1530] He went looking for Bigfoot with me. Oh, okay.

[1531] And Ari Shafir is going to go to a transhumanist conference with me in New York.

[1532] Transhumanism is people that want to download consciousness into computers, like Ray Kurzweil and other like, all the people that are into robots.

[1533] and so he's going to go and do some of that with me too.

[1534] So a lot of it, we're doing, I'm doing it like with comic friends.

[1535] But it's cool to go, have an open mind and just not be snarky, because here's the thing, what people don't realize.

[1536] All these different subcultures and stuff, they have a sense of humor.

[1537] Yeah.

[1538] You don't have to roll your eyes, you know?

[1539] I mean, like, there's a lot of laughs and Willa Creek from these guys, and they're just, you know, they know they're making jokes.

[1540] They're not, you know.

[1541] Yeah, listen, the guys that we were hanging out with up in Seattle and Mount Rainier, they were great guys.

[1542] And one of the guys had a great point.

[1543] He goes, hey, he had never seen Bigfoot.

[1544] And he had been fascinated by it and he'd been looking.

[1545] He said, listen, if I don't ever even see Bigfoot, I'm still camping.

[1546] I'm enjoying the wilderness.

[1547] I'm not here having a good time.

[1548] Which makes me wonder why people get so aggressive about it.

[1549] People get aggressive about music.

[1550] But I mean, yeah, that's true.

[1551] You know, they get aggressive about movies.

[1552] That guy sucks.

[1553] They get aggressive about TV shows.

[1554] Like, how the fuck can you watch this?

[1555] I had a...

[1556] Now, it's actually so played out, but I had a story when I was directing Kimmel's show about Nickelback.

[1557] And the first time I tell the story, I go...

[1558] I go, and I wasn't...

[1559] Like, I think making fun of Nickelback is really hacky at this point.

[1560] But I really said, I go, what's the band that sucks?

[1561] And the guy I mean, they go, Nickelback.

[1562] I go, yes, they were on the show.

[1563] Now, as a comic...

[1564] I go, I'm going to see if that works tomorrow night.

[1565] And it does.

[1566] Every time.

[1567] It's like, it's really funny that these guys, for some reason, are the whipping boy of music.

[1568] I don't understand that.

[1569] I'm confused, but I'll join in.

[1570] I will tell stories out of school that, you know, the manager of Nickelback came into the booth.

[1571] And he goes, don't shoot Chad from the front.

[1572] And I'm like, I don't even know what Chad is.

[1573] you know, I figure out that's the lead singer.

[1574] He says, don't shoot Chad from the front.

[1575] I was like, why?

[1576] It's because of his nose.

[1577] Just shoot him.

[1578] Don't shoot him profile.

[1579] Just shoot him in the front.

[1580] That's what I'm sorry.

[1581] He says, shoot him in the front.

[1582] No profile.

[1583] That's what I said.

[1584] I was like, okay.

[1585] So he leaves, and all the cameramen are my best friends.

[1586] When you're a television director, that's who you really bond with.

[1587] And they're like going, oh, don't you.

[1588] Hey, Bob, can I direct?

[1589] You know, you're letting the manager, Knickleback direct.

[1590] You know, they're really busting my balls.

[1591] So if you see the Kimmel's show, as the show goes off the air, the band's playing, right?

[1592] And so I go, yeah, there's a profile shot.

[1593] And just as I go to the AD, I go, tell me when I have 10 seconds left.

[1594] She goes, okay.

[1595] And she goes, 10 seconds, I go, shoot the nose.

[1596] And six cameras go whizzing in from every direction.

[1597] And I did just a montage of his nose.

[1598] I go, ready camera, five, ready four, ready three, ready six, ready.

[1599] And I just did, and we just went off the air with this guy's nose.

[1600] And so it got super quiet in the headsets.

[1601] And the guys go, hey man, what are we going to do now?

[1602] And I'm like, I'm going to plan for that.

[1603] I'm getting in my car.

[1604] Have a good weekend, guys.

[1605] Did anybody yell at you?

[1606] Well, I know that it didn't make the West Coast broadcast.

[1607] They censored the nose?

[1608] Well, I'm sure people flipped out.

[1609] Because I did something like that to another band That's his fucking nose It's not that bad He's not an ugly guy Again though If someone didn't come into the booth And tell me what to do I wouldn't even have done the tribute to his nose What do you attribute the The whole hate for Nickelback to Is it they're too smooth?

[1610] Are they too polished?

[1611] I don't know why I mean there's Too poppy I don't understand why Why just suddenly everybody gangs on Nickelback When there's so much more crap in the world Yeah, what is it?

[1612] I don't know.

[1613] It's just weird.

[1614] Well, you know what it is?

[1615] I'll tell you what it is.

[1616] There's a safety in bullying.

[1617] If we all decide that we're going to bully Nickelback, then you're not bullying me. Or Justin Bieber.

[1618] Yeah, yeah.

[1619] Or whoever, fill in the blank.

[1620] Liking him or disliking Justin Bieber, I don't have that kind of time, you know?

[1621] You know what I mean?

[1622] I don't even know, you know, he's not for me. Right.

[1623] Although he does.

[1624] But then again, you're a 50 -year -old man, you know.

[1625] Yeah, but here's the thing.

[1626] Yeah, and I just, you know, I think of him in terms of, like, Donnie Osmond when I was growing up, you know, I, you know, I was threatened and weirded out, and then when I got older, I was like, hey, Donnie Osmond's a bad guy.

[1627] He's a nice guy.

[1628] Isn't that weird?

[1629] You end up meeting all the, and Daddy was super nice.

[1630] I did his show, you know, the Donnie and Marie show.

[1631] I had a Donnie doll that I used to bring out a puppet and do, and do so stupid and do weird things.

[1632] I'd do like a puppet show with him?

[1633] Yeah, during his mouth.

[1634] Well, you know, I'm gutting fish, so it wasn't that much of a stretch for me to pull out of Donny Osmond down.

[1635] My early stand -up, there was no jokes.

[1636] I mean, it's nice that you like to meet Bob because I had material then.

[1637] But it was just doing one weird thing after another.

[1638] I was super influenced by Andy Kaufman and Steve Martin and stuff like that.

[1639] So if I did well, it would kind of go well.

[1640] And then sometimes when I did bad, it would go off the rails, you know.

[1641] It just ruined all the other guys' nights.

[1642] well you guys were it was such a that that comedy environment was such a like a hot environment but it also the boston comedy environment really supported originality originality was really huge yeah it was for weird it was nice that that like if you were derivative you didn't get work you know so so so so and you got shit on sure you yeah you get shit on by all your peers nobody just let that slide they they kept a high standard which is difficult for people don't want to maintain a high standard but for people People that are like, you know, you realize that you're going to have to be judged by your peers.

[1643] So you've got this weird court of your peers.

[1644] Yeah.

[1645] So you don't do this.

[1646] You don't do that.

[1647] You don't have other people's acts.

[1648] So then you go on stage.

[1649] Then we're going to goose it and have some of the toughest worst crowds in the world.

[1650] Yeah.

[1651] So it was a good place.

[1652] Nick's comedy stop?

[1653] Sure.

[1654] Animals.

[1655] Did you do the parades?

[1656] Sam's, I had my own.

[1657] I had a thing called Dollar Night at Sam's.

[1658] and it would be me and Stephen Wright and we'd walk the room you know we'd be like what the hell was that I started out of the paradise stitches oh really stitches my first gig yeah yeah yeah so I have a question for you do you think anybody's going to come along and as a comedian and ever be what Steve Martin was do you know what I'm saying like or do you think we're too fractured as a society like my mother had weighed in on Steve Martin she thought he was funny right you know what I'm saying but and you did it as well So it went across the borders.

[1659] Exactly.

[1660] That's what I'm saying.

[1661] My dad knew he was.

[1662] Gaffigan is squeaky clean and I think funny to everybody.

[1663] Brian Regan.

[1664] But these guys appeal to everybody, but they're not the phenomenon.

[1665] They're not on the cover of Rolling Stone.

[1666] Yeah, right.

[1667] I feel you.

[1668] Yeah.

[1669] That's a good point.

[1670] I don't think it could happen.

[1671] I mean, there's certain things I don't think can happen anymore because of the digital age.

[1672] I'm not saying it's good or bad, but I'm just saying...

[1673] I don't know about that because Dan Cook cracked through because of the digital age.

[1674] And although his was more of like a teeny bopper sort of a crap.

[1675] Yeah, again.

[1676] That guy was doing 18 ,000 -seat arenas.

[1677] You know, that was very Steve Martin -esque.

[1678] But when I was growing up, Steve Martin, you had to deal with.

[1679] You know, my parents, if they were alive, would not know who Dane Cook is.

[1680] Yeah, but that's just Dane Cook.

[1681] I'm saying he broke through in his digital age.

[1682] Sure, no, I'm saying there's going to be people that'll be huge.

[1683] But I don't think there'll be people that are so huge that everybody in the family knows them and they're a phenomenon.

[1684] I wonder.

[1685] I don't think it could happen again.

[1686] You might be right.

[1687] And we are definitely more fragmented than ever.

[1688] before in a way it's a good thing because there's a lot more audience for more obscure people that wouldn't have had an outlet before i think that's great i think that's great too but i do worry about like um the our exposure to our our world gets minute or maybe i'll just say for myself am i going to go to bbc and learn today about the you know about the events or am i going to click on the Bigfoot site and go down a rabbit hole for two hours.

[1689] What do you think is going to happen?

[1690] I do the same thing.

[1691] There's something, you know, when you had a newspaper now, it's like, I'm an old guy yelling, get off my lawn, but you had a newspaper, I go through, oh, I'm interested in that.

[1692] I didn't know that was going on in China.

[1693] And I think the digital age makes it a little bit too much.

[1694] You can find news that agrees with your outlook, which is weird.

[1695] The news should not be, you know, it should be.

[1696] it's never impartial but it should be it should be somewhat yeah you could if you have confirmation bias you could support it really easily in the internet just stick into a bubble yeah i think uh i love like whenever when i'm ego surfing and i see someone call me a libtard and you know i'm like i'm so out of there a libtard yeah when someone calls you a liberal that's hilarious self -hating liberal liberal liberal is one of the weirdest sort of insults ever because if you look at the like okay let's look at the official the definition of it yeah it's an official official definition of liberal okay where's a yeah this is a C lib tard yeah look at it up in a dictionary it says to open open to new behavior or opinions and willing to discard traditional values that's hilarious that sounds pretty positive unprejudiced unbigoted broad -minded broad -minded open -minded, enlightened, permissive, free, free and easy, and easygoing.

[1697] Now, the only thing that seems to be threatening me would be to folks is disregarding, what was it?

[1698] Disregarding traditional values.

[1699] Yeah, see, that's very threatening to people.

[1700] There's people that treat the Constitution as if it's like the Ten Commandments, that there's no, you know, we're checks and balances.

[1701] You know, we can change and adjust things, but there's so people that are so incredibly.

[1702] grain that's really scary you know i think there's also the real problem with liberalism is a lot of people know that folks naturally are inclined to be lazy fucks and if you give people an easy way out they'll take it so as soon as you start advocating giving people aid or helping people out or people i get them up get that fucker up it's like there's a part of people that resent them immediately resent yeah there's a resentment against like the ideas that liberals are not in Like after World War II, it's like, hey, you're down on your luck, you know.

[1703] Here's your GI loan.

[1704] Here's this.

[1705] Here's that.

[1706] It was a much, much, much harder world that they were dealing with.

[1707] And it was only a couple of decades after the fucking depression.

[1708] People are much more used to living together, scraping to get by.

[1709] Your parents almost starved to death 20 years ago, and they all have stories about it.

[1710] Yeah.

[1711] My grandfather had horrible stories about the depression.

[1712] Yeah, my own man lived through the depression, and that'll make, well, my home man's a whole man. another can of worms but as was mine you know what would we be sitting here talking no yeah you'd never you'd never be a comic I think that's one of the number one pieces of I've never met a comic that didn't have a fucked up life yeah I don't think I've ever met one basically I think my act it was me going on stage going mom do you do you hear me I think that's what I think that's That's in a nutshell.

[1713] Yeah.

[1714] That's 100%.

[1715] But it's funny how it's like my favorite art form comes out of that in balance.

[1716] It seems like it's the only way to achieve it.

[1717] It's like to achieve it correctly.

[1718] Like something, there has to be some sort of a deficit to create this, you know, it's a reaction to a lack of something.

[1719] It's not just a natural progression from, I was kind of a funny guy in high school and I figured, let me try out this stand -up thing.

[1720] You know, it's more of like it.

[1721] Well, here's the thing.

[1722] It's what we're missing is that that.

[1723] Those times that we bombed, we probably should have never got back on stage.

[1724] Right.

[1725] But we eat it and then go back up again because it's horrible.

[1726] It's a crazy weird thing.

[1727] You know, like often the funniest guy in the room is not the comedian.

[1728] Often, many times.

[1729] The comedian's got the illness or the nads to go up there.

[1730] Or both.

[1731] Yeah.

[1732] But, you know, something's happening lately on stage, and this is not me, lying that all of a sudden for the first time in 30 years I'm sometimes having fun up there I was always panicked the whole time really yeah something new like all of a sudden um I'm uh I don't know man I'm on this new thing like sometimes with the right crowd I actually enjoy it and uh and yeah you know it's a new new thing isn't that something that people enjoy so much to come see and it looks like you're having so much fun up there but for a lot of folks it's just terror and fear and and worry about bombing and just fucking trying to get it when it's over and then you're fuck two more shows tomorrow even if you're killing every show you know so times it's a it's a new thing you know suddenly it dawned on me what was a new thing that dawned on me is like it was okay these people have an expectation and I'm not doing that but how can I warm up to them how can I include them so it's not just me saying this is what I see the world as this is what I see is funny if you don't like it cram it I'm not saying compromise what I believe in but suddenly I was doing like a little bit of crowd crowd work that wasn't like you know how do you know when you're finished you know you know to actually just sit around and poke around and talk to folks and it's been different it made my it made doing stand up a lot more fun that's awesome man I love when people like refined the joy of performing or find it after all these times.

[1733] Well like Cosby's funny still and I'm like oh what is he doing?

[1734] How is he doing that?

[1735] How is he funny?

[1736] He doesn't have an opening act.

[1737] Yeah, yeah.

[1738] Cosby does like an hour and a half.

[1739] Hello everybody.

[1740] It sits down and boom.

[1741] It was actually Louis that said to me. He was like, C .K. He's like, he's like, go see Cosby.

[1742] He goes, it's going to do a ton of material.

[1743] You're going to think 20 minutes went by, he's still funny.

[1744] And lo and behold yeah I go and I was like this is weird I wanted to be bitter and he ruined it maybe it's because he just enjoys the art form as long as like stand up to me seems like when I feel like when I'm like really tuned into it I'm as much of I'm like a passenger and I feel like it's a group hypnosis thing like you lock people and you know how to do the bits right you know where it's going you know the setup and you hold the pause and it becomes like this big and if you tune into that frequency and nourish it as long as you continue to nourish it it seems like something that would always be there it seems like when people lose it is when they take a couple years off and then they go back again or something happens and not really into it anymore I think it's maybe the opposite it's like when people just this works I'm going to do it and just get out of here tonight with my life get the check you know I mean so because I know I have done that you know but this is different a new phase where I go all right it's not a mistake you're here you know what I mean slow it down slow it down and instead of just blurting out those new ideas you know that's usually what I do like in the first couple minutes whatever the new ideas is and then I do the act I go I go slow it down it has been new you know maybe people like I'll see you know I keep doing it and see if folks like it but you know are you more comfortable as a person now yeah yeah so is that it you think Yeah, I'm not like, you know, rainbows and crappin unicorns all day.

[1745] I mean, I get dark, but I will say the majority of the time I'm happy and I'm happy when I'm making stuff.

[1746] So now I know that, well, okay, no one greenlit this movie or no one did this and that.

[1747] I pick up my, you know, I start writing, you know, it doesn't matter if it gets made or not.

[1748] That process is very freeing.

[1749] Yeah, there's something about creating things where especially if people enjoy those things.

[1750] If you can put those things out and they can, like, people can, like, actually get like a, like, when, like, say someone goes to see Willow Creek, if you go and see this movie, what you're going to get is, like, a feeling, you're going to sit down and this thing's going to happen in front of you and you're going to, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, and you're going to have all this feeling attached to, and you as, you know, the pretentious word, artist, but you as an artist, like, as someone who's created this, gets to sit there and realize that your effort, your thought, your focus, all this.

[1751] You piece it together, you edit it up, and boom, and then you deliver it, and then you get to watch all this positive reaction.

[1752] You just want to go do more.

[1753] You just want to continue that cycle of putting out cool shit.

[1754] For me, I think it's kind of like I keep making these movies, and it's really exciting, especially like the last four.

[1755] When after the movie, people are chatty.

[1756] They're like, blah, blah, blah, blah, which happens.

[1757] It's really sweet.

[1758] And I guess basically what I'm doing is I'm shooting out of flair.

[1759] saying do you do you guys see this do you guys feel this is this right or is this what's going on or wouldn't this be cool right right that's what i'm doing when i make a movie well that's the way to do it man i mean you're you're it's it's a true form of expression like instead of you saying oh this'll sell you know hey if i box this with that and add in a funny black guy boom i'm fucking i'm in i do the voice yeah instead you're like you know what man i'm fucking into bigfoot Let's make this weird, fucking crazy movie about Bigfoot.

[1760] Well, that's what I got to say about my wife.

[1761] That's really funny.

[1762] She says, she says, go, you know, go to your big foot.

[1763] You wanted to get it out of your system.

[1764] She let me drive around for a week.

[1765] So is that what you did to write it?

[1766] You just drove around for a week?

[1767] I truly wasn't even like writing.

[1768] It was really just, just, I'm going to go.

[1769] I'm going to talk to people.

[1770] I'm just going to do this with no agenda, you know?

[1771] Wow.

[1772] I knew that someday.

[1773] I'd probably make a movie, but it was really more just like, do you know how freeing that is?

[1774] Like, take out like five, six days and not have, you know, the, you know, I still had to do a couple phoneers, which is funny, you know.

[1775] They're going, where are you?

[1776] I'm looking for Bigfoot, man. That's hilarious.

[1777] You're doing phoneers for gigs, like for upcoming gigs?

[1778] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1779] I'll be in Peoria at the jukebox, but right now, I'm at, you know, so.

[1780] So you go out there, you take 11 days, you go wandering around for Bigfoot.

[1781] Where did you decide to start?

[1782] Did you have a specific...

[1783] No, no. I drove up first to Santa Cruz and the Sierra's twos.

[1784] I drove around there.

[1785] I heard Santa Cruz is amazing.

[1786] I've never been.

[1787] It's beautiful up there.

[1788] It's really, really awesome.

[1789] You know, I just went where, like, kind of poked around and knew certain sites where people had seen, you know, or heard or, you know, events, you know.

[1790] And then, and that's, again, I ended up in Willow Creek.

[1791] I didn't go up to Happy Camp, which I...

[1792] I probably will still.

[1793] I mean, that's another pretty, a sats.

[1794] Happy camp?

[1795] Yeah, it's above Orleans.

[1796] It's above Bluff Creek and everything.

[1797] It's still another place that there's a lot of squatch activity.

[1798] Isn't there a bunch of different names for those areas, too, that are like monkey names and ape canyon?

[1799] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1800] In Oregon, yeah.

[1801] Very strange.

[1802] How many things.

[1803] And in Mount Rainier up in that area.

[1804] there's a bunch of names that are one of the North American names for Bigfoot.

[1805] There's a bunch of like canyons that are named after that.

[1806] So this guy starts talking about all these different areas and it's got this weird North American, you know, name in it.

[1807] And he said, well, that's when we just, that's how we started our Bigfoot squatching.

[1808] We just started going to all these places that the North American Indians had named after Bigfoot.

[1809] I'm like, that is fucking crazy.

[1810] Like they named spots.

[1811] Again, yeah.

[1812] It makes you fucking think.

[1813] Yeah.

[1814] And it's also, when all said and done, you know, it's, whenever you're a subculture, you're going to get ridiculed and picked upon.

[1815] But like you said, it's just camping.

[1816] It's camp.

[1817] And it's fun.

[1818] There's something silly about it.

[1819] I mean, I went with Dunkin' Trous and we ate pot candies and had a fucking blast.

[1820] Well, that's what I was wondering about, because I know some of these guys are high.

[1821] Of course.

[1822] But they're very worried about what Bigfoot, you know, because Bigfoot likes different smells.

[1823] And, you know, so.

[1824] And I'm like, are they eating it?

[1825] They've got to eat it.

[1826] Well, if they're smart, they'd eat it.

[1827] But even if you eat strong weed, like, you open up, like, I remember one time, I won't even say his name, but we were on a plane.

[1828] And he had brought a Tupperware thing and his fucking carry -on with weed cookies.

[1829] And it was an international flight, okay?

[1830] And this motherfucker opens the lid and he goes, do you want one?

[1831] Red band's not here.

[1832] You can say it.

[1833] It wasn't him.

[1834] No, I know.

[1835] I'll tell you that.

[1836] he opens the lid and the smell was so strong I'm like oh my god we're going to jail I'm like are you crazy do you know what that smells like he's like I can't even smell it and I was like you can't smell it because you've been smelling it for so long you are it it was so scary it was so powerful strong I would think if you had those brownies out there in the woods Bigfoot's gonna fucking smell now have I ever told you the Tony V's story about when he was the American Tourista gorilla no okay this is great I don't think so Tony won a contract to be the guerrilla, and so he'd show up.

[1837] Now, Tony's a big guy, right?

[1838] He's like, like $2 .50, you know, maybe a little heavier sometimes.

[1839] So he's a big guy.

[1840] I think he was about three bills when he was the gorilla.

[1841] So Rick Baker builds him a gorilla suit that's $20 ,000.

[1842] It's made of, like, real hair, and it's got this whole gorilla muscle structure.

[1843] Now, Tony goes to, like, hockey games and stuff, and people get mad.

[1844] You know, they're like, he goes out on the ice.

[1845] Fuck you, guerrilla.

[1846] You're not the real guerrilla.

[1847] You know, people are just mad.

[1848] We're fucking horrible, right?

[1849] Animals.

[1850] So, Tony, the gorilla suit's got a better deal than Tony.

[1851] It's got a guy that travels with these anvil cases and packs it up.

[1852] And so Tony's doing stand -up in the meantime with me and hopscatching while he's doing the guerrilla dates.

[1853] Now, the gorilla suit is not with us, but he's got this onesie, this big, you.

[1854] Unitar that he wears under the gorilla suit and clearly he was having some chafing problems so he goes and um so we're getting searched through customs going out of Canada and there's all this uh like white powder and rocks that form from his sweat from the crotch sweat and swear the guy the guy the custom guy licks his finger and he picks up one of the rocks and he tastes it from his balls.

[1855] Oh, no!

[1856] It was a ball.

[1857] It was a rock of baby powder.

[1858] No!

[1859] From his balls!

[1860] From his balls sweat.

[1861] And I think I'm kind of, I think I'm witty.

[1862] All I do is I go, ah, his balls, that's all I got.

[1863] I'm just, tears, tears.

[1864] That's all you can get out.

[1865] As soon as the guy, as soon as the rock, this thing hit his tongue, he was just immediately, he was like, I don't know what he's like, he could tell, like, he's like balls and old man dick and he's just like what the fuck is going on it was the best face ever just like hyperventilating we we are we are actually because i love tony like tony i love tony we're just holding each other out we're just two guys just wrapped around each other crying and what is the guy doing it was the best thing we ever saw what is he doing furious Furious.

[1866] He's mad?

[1867] Furious.

[1868] What the fuck?

[1869] Who told him to put it in his mouth?

[1870] We could have stopped him, by the way.

[1871] He licks the finger, and then he's got all the way down, and we both look, like our head snapping.

[1872] Oh, that is so funny.

[1873] That was the best thing ever.

[1874] He thought it was coke.

[1875] He thought he was catching someone.

[1876] Yeah, he thought he got the big.

[1877] I got a big case here.

[1878] He's got the big collar.

[1879] He's going to get kicked upstairs.

[1880] Oh, that is so funny.

[1881] Tony V told me one of the most important things that I ever learned about driving.

[1882] because he was driving back and forth from New York to Boston.

[1883] It was a long thing, and he was doing it a lot.

[1884] I forget what he was working on, but he was driving back and forth a lot.

[1885] And I go, how do you do that without going crazy?

[1886] He goes, I just go zen.

[1887] He goes, when I'm in the car, I just say, now this is what I'm doing.

[1888] He goes, I don't say, man, I wish I wasn't doing this, and I could be doing something else.

[1889] He goes, I just say, this is what I'm doing.

[1890] And that's, I never thought about it that way.

[1891] I was like, yeah, you can do things you don't want to do like that And just have it in your head.

[1892] Now, this is what I'm doing.

[1893] My wife had a friend who, he sold ice cream in an ice cream truck, and it played turkey in the straw over and over.

[1894] What is that?

[1895] Da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -all day long, turkey and the straw.

[1896] And he said, you know what I did?

[1897] I said, I'm going to make that my favorite song.

[1898] And so it became his favorite jam.

[1899] Wow, that's madness.

[1900] Like, yeah, yeah.

[1901] Ice cream truck, that would be the best job.

[1902] That would be horrible.

[1903] You could deal with a lot of shitty kids.

[1904] They would definitely make you want to not have kids.

[1905] Yeah, and I'd also be like, you're giving kids ice cream on the side.

[1906] And mostly aren't people just selling weed out of ice cream trucks?

[1907] I don't know.

[1908] If you're lucky, if you're in a good name.

[1909] I mean, there's the Van Halen song.

[1910] You know, it's funny as you grow up.

[1911] Like, I grew up, you know, I was the first generation of, like, getting, you know, the Ramones you know they they I got to see them live actually would help build the PAs that's how I'd sneak in the bars when I was underage the Ramones just punk rock and all this stuff and I rebelled against all this stuff as it kept coming up like yeah you know then later on the kids were in the Van Halen I'm like that's not punk rock you know I was an asshole right but I was down in Baja with a bunch of buddies and they were all surfing and I'm like the and I mean we're in the middle of nowhere like about about five, six hours.

[1912] Yeah, you know, just, I don't know if you've ever gone out in Mexico.

[1913] No. I think it's a little too sketchy now, but there's nothing around there.

[1914] Any surfers with no shipwreck, it's a famous surf site.

[1915] And, you know, and we're driving along the side of a cliff, and I'm driving this Jeep, and we're playing Panama from Van Halen fucking loud.

[1916] And everybody's fucked out except me. I'm the designated, you know, Joe Sober fucking.

[1917] But it was finally like, hey man I get Van Halen you finally got it I got Van Halen what was the song to push you over the edge it was Panama that song it's a great fucking song it's just loud and there's stars and these guys are screaming and as I keep speeding going over gigantic potholes they're all thinking they're doomed and I was like again it's like I'm good in chaos I go now I get Van Halen isn't that a funny thing that you do though that people do we all do it especially when you're young where if someone doesn't like what you like Like, you get fucking angry.

[1918] So angry.

[1919] You like what you like is shit.

[1920] You know, I don't think, you hate them for liking it.

[1921] Here's an exclusive, because I do tell a lot of yarns and, well, they're all true, but I have a lot of stories.

[1922] Here's a story I've never told anyone.

[1923] When I was opening for Nirvana, we were at, here in L .A., so I don't know which form.

[1924] I think it was the form.

[1925] I don't know.

[1926] But, and Eddie Van Halen shows up, and he's really fucking hammered.

[1927] And he wants to jam.

[1928] And Kurt is totally flipped out, like, Eddie Van Halen wants to, he's like, hide me. So Eddie wants to go up and shred?

[1929] Yeah, and he's fucking hammered.

[1930] I go, dude, give him one of your guitars, because Kurt played left -handed.

[1931] And I go, it'll be great, you know.

[1932] He won't be able to play it.

[1933] And he's like, he would figure it out.

[1934] Like, I was like, this would be so funny.

[1935] But it was really weird.

[1936] He probably would.

[1937] We had David Lee Roth coming here.

[1938] He couldn't be fucking cooler.

[1939] I met him one night at the comedy store He was the greatest guy Just hanging out No pretense Just him and a buddy In the 80s they were gonna Because Purple Rain made money And they were gonna give him money And it was this insane script You know It was just a movie Yeah yeah I went in a red form Why did they never do that He's so charismatic Why did they never give him a movie That's what He's probably too busy Fucking everything But there could be a movie there You know that's the thing It's like look at him You know maybe You know what he's doing now What?

[1940] He lives in Japan, okay?

[1941] He lives in an apartment with his dog, and he practices sword fighting all day.

[1942] I'm not kidding.

[1943] No, I believe it.

[1944] Move to Japan by himself.

[1945] He's a fascinating guy.

[1946] We had him in here.

[1947] First of all, the fucking guy wears overalls everywhere he goes.

[1948] Okay.

[1949] He's comfortable with his nipples?

[1950] I don't know.

[1951] He just likes wearing overalls.

[1952] Don't they buggering your nipples?

[1953] I haven't worn him in a long time.

[1954] I'd have to cut back to you.

[1955] Coveralls or overalls?

[1956] You know, they have the little things like the farmers wear.

[1957] Yeah, yeah.

[1958] Clip up here and he, yeah, we have them.

[1959] See, look, he's wearing overalls.

[1960] See that?

[1961] Oh, he's got a shirt on it.

[1962] I thought he wasn't wearing a shirt.

[1963] No, look, overalls.

[1964] It's hilarious.

[1965] And so he does his sword.

[1966] Practice his sword fighting.

[1967] And not to be so crass, but does he, is he set?

[1968] I mean?

[1969] Financially?

[1970] Yeah, I'm sure he's got to be said.

[1971] Do you know much fucking money David Lee Roth must have?

[1972] David Lee Roth is, first of all, he's very smart.

[1973] And I think he's also a savvy guy.

[1974] I do not see him overindulging to the point of something like that.

[1975] he likes living small he shows up here by himself he's one of the biggest rock stars of all time drives himself here shows up by himself hey guys no no pretense comes in sit down how's everybody but a lot of a lot of the the folks that have longevity do that yeah you know i mean like like i haven't seen him in a long time but there was a period where i spent some time around i sound like i'm just name driving all my stories but it would be bob and he would do that you know you know he was he said i Bowie Nightden.

[1976] Now you sound like, well, when I started talking, you know, I know, I know.

[1977] No, no, I'm just kidding.

[1978] It is, yeah.

[1979] But it's true.

[1980] But here's the thing.

[1981] You've always, you, if you're in show business, these are the folks that you become friends with, not all of them, but, you know, some of your stories.

[1982] I mean, you just told me a David Lee Roth story.

[1983] Yeah.

[1984] But you also have a show.

[1985] Maybe that.

[1986] Well, he came in to promote his show.

[1987] He has a podcast.

[1988] He has his own podcast.

[1989] Yeah, he does it from Japan.

[1990] It's fucking great.

[1991] It's fun.

[1992] He gets up, does his podcast.

[1993] He does a video podcast.

[1994] I think, find out what the address is.

[1995] I don't know what the address is.

[1996] And then he sword fights.

[1997] I think he calls it, is it Dave TV or something like that?

[1998] Now, I remember he also, I heard this.

[1999] I don't know if this is true, but I heard that, and you would know this maybe because of martial arts.

[2000] He would sweep the stage after the show.

[2001] Really?

[2002] I heard that.

[2003] I don't know if it's true.

[2004] I didn't ask him, but I could see him doing something like that.

[2005] Just has it.

[2006] discipline yeah i could see him doing so he's a weird guy the roth show that's what i remember we were uh again with the nirvana but this is one the that's another funny story i thought was um one of the crew guys had worked with uh the nuge had worked with dad nudge and um and kurt enjoyed hearing the story because you know the nudge would hit the stage with an air ramp like he hit the this air ramp you know like a stuntman and he would shoot him over the amp but i guess like yeah and so he can fly and And then, wow, with the guitar, and just go shooting over and land, which...

[2007] Land on what?

[2008] He would hit the stage.

[2009] How far would he fall?

[2010] From the top of a stack of marshals.

[2011] Holy shit.

[2012] It shot him off like a cannon.

[2013] So, but apparently, Kurt enjoyed it because I witnessed hearing the story about when he clipped the top of the speakers with, like, his boot heels and just ate shit and landed on his guitar.

[2014] Oh, come on.

[2015] Well, his knees are all fucked up.

[2016] he hobbles really bad now I think he just had some serious knee operations It could be that air ramp Jesus I'd imagine Are you glad we don't have to go out that way Flying over the fucking Cowboy boots on or something stupid Right you know Every audience You know Isn't red hot You know I mean there's got to be times where you go Over the amp And the crowds like Yeah they're in a beer line I'm trying to get him to do the podcast He's gonna be at the Canyon Cove in July Well, why wouldn't he?

[2017] I don't know.

[2018] Oh, okay.

[2019] Of course he will.

[2020] I shot an animal for him, just to be friends.

[2021] I went deer hunting just so I could call him my friend.

[2022] No, that's not why I did it.

[2023] But I really would like to get him in.

[2024] He's a fascinating character.

[2025] Of course he is.

[2026] And his hunting show, I watch his hunting show.

[2027] It's called Spirit of the Wild.

[2028] And is it the hunting, does he go around the world or is it his backyard?

[2029] The second part.

[2030] Yeah.

[2031] Now, see, the latter.

[2032] When the Kimmel Show is in the church.

[2033] I pitched an idea that nobody bit, and the idea was we were going to get the nudge, right?

[2034] We're going to get Ted on, and then we're going to take, like, Guillermo and Uncle Frank and maybe someone else.

[2035] Go bo -hunting.

[2036] No, no. I was going to, I was just going to get him a paint gun and then make them, you know, the hardest prey, you know, and send them out in the streets and have Ted Nugent on Uncle Frank.

[2037] That's funny.

[2038] You know, and it was great because it was a snowstorm.

[2039] It would have been so fun, you know.

[2040] That would have been really funny.

[2041] these guys running away from Nuge while he hits him with paint balls.

[2042] And it was in Detroit in the snow?

[2043] Yeah, yeah.

[2044] That would have been hilarious.

[2045] I was just in the, I was in Detroit this weekend doing Stam.

[2046] And then I went to Dallas and showed Willow Creek down there at a small festival called the Oak Cliff Festival.

[2047] It was fun.

[2048] Nugent has this honey show and he sets food out and he climbs in a tree with a bow and arrow and just fucks these deer up.

[2049] Every day, he's fucking up a new deer that's going to eat his food.

[2050] Now, but see, he eats him and he gives the food.

[2051] And does he have to abide by Michigan law?

[2052] He's not in Michigan anymore.

[2053] He's in Texas.

[2054] I'm kind of a fan boy.

[2055] Kind of a Ted Nuget fan boy.

[2056] So in Texas, can he just, you know, shoot?

[2057] You know what I'm saying?

[2058] Like, if he owns an animal, can he kill it without having to abide by?

[2059] Texas is one of the best places for that, for what they call high fence operations.

[2060] But it depends on the animal.

[2061] And there's a lot of animals that they keep in those high fence places that are not.

[2062] They're not native.

[2063] They're like African animals, like a scimitar.

[2064] So they don't have a season?

[2065] No, no season.

[2066] They shoot them whenever they want to.

[2067] So you could shoot them every day if you chose.

[2068] So they come from another country.

[2069] Yep.

[2070] They go, this is pretty nice.

[2071] I'm getting three squares.

[2072] Holy shit.

[2073] Is that Ted Nugent?

[2074] Mom!

[2075] This is a fucking flang stick.

[2076] Right through my heart.

[2077] My older brother, he's no longer with us, but he, he, he, he's, he's no longer with us.

[2078] He was a poacher.

[2079] I mean, that's why I, he just shot things all year long.

[2080] Well, that's really common in a lot of places.

[2081] Yeah, I mean, the Pacific Northwest, they were telling us how to poach.

[2082] When we were up there hunting for Bigfoot, there's a, there was a woman that was a woman who worked to this store.

[2083] She was like, well, she goes, when we see elk, we just shoot him with a bone arrow and nobody could hear it.

[2084] Yeah, well, my brother had everything figured out.

[2085] He had a, I brought Tony V. out to his house once.

[2086] and I'd given him some money to to insulate his home and I wanted to buy some new windows and I wanted to make sure he used the money so I went to visit my brother basically and Tony we get out of the car and there's just corn like psycho corn it's just growing up everywhere and Tony's what's going on with the corn because it's you know I mean there's no rose and my brother's like oh that's for the deer you know by it's for the deer and Tony's like oh you you help him through the winter he's like I don't know blast them I go up to the top store of the window in the bathroom and it's shattered It's a fucking sniper's perch Yeah I go what happened to the bathroom window He goes oh recoil My brother He's shooting out the window On the toilet He's shooting deer From the toilet By the way there's some guys who are going Wow that guy had it all He had it all All he's missing is a Q -tip In his ear While he's taking his shit and shoot the lamb he'd be like you know and they want to go hunt and meet me in the kitchen so oh when we're leaving Tony V goes hey what is that over there was that like a woodchuck and my brother goes yeah and then we're not even around the corner and we're at blam and Tony goes I just figured that woodchuck I go yeah you drop the time on that woodchuck why would you shoot a woodchuck because he just shot animals he just he went his friends were telling him me, you know, stories were amazing, you know, stories I hadn't heard.

[2087] Oh, yeah, you're brother, you know, because there's a swan pond.

[2088] I was like, don't tell me, she killed swans.

[2089] He goes, no, no, no. But there was some big, I don't know what was in their trout or something.

[2090] So they had taken an acid and they were climbed over to the swan pond and we're fishing and shooting.

[2091] He would go dynamite fishing.

[2092] That's why, like, my life is like, you know, I had back surgery less than a month and a half ago.

[2093] It was my birthday at the end of May, and I get a ladder on.

[2094] And the old nine's like, what are you doing?

[2095] I go, well, I think it'd be fun to jump into the pool from the ladder.

[2096] Because instead of it, and she's like, that is a horrible idea.

[2097] Jesus Christ.

[2098] I just see you slipping, a thing coming down in the ladder.

[2099] Well, I'll give you an idea.

[2100] I was sitting at home because of the back surgery.

[2101] What did you get done to your back?

[2102] I had some disc and bone spurs.

[2103] I feel great.

[2104] What they do?

[2105] They took a little bit of my disc.

[2106] away and took out the bone spurs but I had other problems before I had nerves that were smashed into two vertebrates yeah that were making so my leg just I couldn't walk I have back issues that's oh really I have a disc a bulging disc oh well I have a dude when you want to cowboy up he cut it they cut a piece of the disc away yeah and I got to tell you the surgery heals up and now my leg and I don't have back pain you know I lost 20 pounds I as soon as because I could I have my life back but that's amazing but so I said that i've been sober since i was 19 but here's i mean yeah 19 so but the thing it was is i with the back surgery i i i i had a break i you know i i i they put me on the lot it was a balad it was a bala yeah so have you had delano no but it's in cowboy movies yeah it's morphine so so it's the shit that killed lenny bruce and and really yeah so so it's awesome by the way it was the best thing ever i was trying to explain it i was like i said that But it's not, because, like, people describe heroin as coming, as, like, you know, like that.

[2107] And it's like, no, it's, the lot of it is, like, right after that and before regret, you know what I mean?

[2108] It's before shame and regret.

[2109] Right.

[2110] The bridge.

[2111] It's that five -second window.

[2112] And it lasts all day.

[2113] Where would you put NyQuil, like original NyQuil, the real shit?

[2114] Compared to Delotted?

[2115] Yeah.

[2116] Like a, like a two.

[2117] Whoa.

[2118] Yeah, I'm telling you, man. And it was like, it was, you know, and I'm glad I went through this back surgery and, and when it was over, got off the dope.

[2119] Yeah, that's what I was going to ask you.

[2120] And I gave it, were you nervous about that?

[2121] I was terrified, terrified.

[2122] And I gave it, I gave it to the oh nine.

[2123] Why did you need it?

[2124] Because of the pain.

[2125] I mean, the pain was so bad.

[2126] Like, you know, they go over to your.

[2127] Post -surgery pain?

[2128] Pre and post, but the problem was is that I have, I have no sense of reality.

[2129] Like, I don't know the difference.

[2130] between an ingrown toenail and a ruptured disc.

[2131] I really don't.

[2132] Like, it's just pain, you know what I mean?

[2133] So I was in so much pain, and it was, it was, so, but here's at one point, already I have a problem with good ideas and bad ideas.

[2134] So my friends are over the house, and I say to my wife, I go, wouldn't it be funny if I shot a hole in the roof with a 22?

[2135] She was, it wouldn't be funny at all.

[2136] I go, yeah, it scared.

[2137] the cats.

[2138] This is why you're on Delaudin?

[2139] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[2140] With a gun.

[2141] Yeah, well, at least...

[2142] Hunter Thompson, Jr. over here.

[2143] At least I ran it by her.

[2144] Wow, thank God she's there for you.

[2145] She's like, no, that would.

[2146] She's your filter.

[2147] Yeah.

[2148] It's amazing.

[2149] You need someone to tell you that.

[2150] Well, that was Delotted.

[2151] But I will say, it's always, and I pass this down to my daughter, it's always the funny story.

[2152] That outweighs everything else.

[2153] Like, later on, it's the funny story.

[2154] Well, that's also what's gotten you.

[2155] you mean as a comic that's sort of what gets you like your life your career your livelihood is having these stories it's a it's a valuable asset well like i love that my daughter has it oh that's well that's cool i mean she loves her daddy she went to a wedding she says i didn't know anybody i go well what did you do she said during the first song i ran out and hump the bride she really did that oh yeah yeah of course she always knows that it's the stories you know she's got the photos looked at you know when you took this dilauded shit you were 19 you quit doing everything and then is it 19 to 50 and then there's nothing in between them well I had a back surgery before so that that was funny because at one point like I said I put it in the hands of someone else I give it to to my wife but do you give yourself a green light to do shit like that because you're in pain like I had a Again, I had to talk to other folks and say, look, man, and that had to explain, this is what this is for.

[2156] But I've had surgery before, knee surgery, and I just dealt with the pain because I don't like it.

[2157] Right.

[2158] I don't like it.

[2159] I don't like all that stuff.

[2160] All that stuff actually has a really weird reaction to me, and I become a big asshole.

[2161] Oh, that's interesting.

[2162] I become really nashy.

[2163] I just really an asshole.

[2164] I mean, I'm not like punching my wife, but I mean, I'm just short, and I just tell what to do.

[2165] And so this was what worked.

[2166] And, you know, I was on this, and the first time.

[2167] Did you ever try to do it without it?

[2168] Yeah, yeah, definitely.

[2169] And they're going, this is crazy.

[2170] You know, and they actually just slammed morphine into my back because they're going, this is crazy that you're walking around, you know.

[2171] And I thought, well, okay, I can handle it.

[2172] I'm sorry.

[2173] You know what I did?

[2174] You know what I did?

[2175] I just vomited him.

[2176] Immediately.

[2177] That's fine.

[2178] But I was sitting there one day, and this is the first time, and I'm watching Lifetime.

[2179] And I'm just sobbing.

[2180] And my wife comes in, and she goes, you don't get any more pain medicine starting now.

[2181] I married a man. Oh, that's funny.

[2182] I did not marry a man that cries during Mommy, man I sleep with danger, sorry, Tori.

[2183] spelling or whatever I was watching on Lifetime movies made you cry yeah she's like remind me she's like that's it remind me not to take that stuff ever I don't want to cry and I want to watch lifetime movies I don't want either one of those things I was doing Q &As for the movie on dollotted wow when I went to the Boston film tell the people that you're on yeah I just said I'm really high because what else is I going to do now was it painful just like sit down just like to sit up straight did you yeah I got to the point where sitting was a pain and walking was a pain.

[2184] Lower back?

[2185] Yeah.

[2186] And it affected my life to the point where I don't know if you're this way, what you go, you measure things.

[2187] If I go to the store, that's going to hurt a lot.

[2188] Can I go?

[2189] You know what I mean?

[2190] It's sort of affecting what you do to the point where, you know, I didn't have, I was 50 or in my late 40s and thinking like a senior citizen.

[2191] So, and now I'm back, you know.

[2192] That's amazing.

[2193] Yeah, back surgeries, scary shit.

[2194] back surgery is a spooky one for people i have a well it sounds i have a great doctor but my it sounds like are you worried about the control surrendering it is that it i mean i i i went to a bunch of doctors oh really yeah i've had nose surgery back surgery i mean um knee surgery twice three times three what happened to your knee i tore my ACL and both knees i had them reconstructed and i told my meniscus the first one was uh kickboxing the second one was jujitsu and what happens take me through that like when it happens you like well um the first one do you think you broke your leg i knew something was really bad i knew something was really wrong like it popped it was a terrible tear terrible pain the first one hurt a lot more the second one didn't even hurt it was really weird because it was um i was in what's called a half guard so someone's legs are wrapped around your legs and he extended his legs and my leg went sideways and just went snap like a carrot it was really weird it was like this pop noise and then uh i didn't even know it was the acel was gone until i was walking i think it was in my office i was moving something and i like just gave out on me that's really weird and i had already had my left done so i knew that my right was probably fucked so the first one was that during a match no it was training both of them were during training okay and what does how does the other guy feel is he's like yeah it wasn't his fault it was totally no but i mean does he feel weird oh yeah he felt bad he felt terrible the guy Will is a guy who It happened to The second time It was a friend of mine He's a really nice guy And he feels terrible Yeah, when you train I've had a guy's I had a guy's leg explode on me A couple of times Yeah Two different times That I can remember One time the guy blamed me But that was ridiculous It was just It's just in the middle scrambling Like sometimes your knee just gives out And then the other And the one time A guy didn't tap in time And his knee just exploded It's went Popa pop pop pop But it was like It was a weird situation it was like he didn't really have to tap like sometimes like you can get out of things and you're real close and then all something in the middle of like trying to get out of it like he was pretty close to getting out of it his knee just gave out like got you it was a weird sort of a thing and it made this horrible loud sound now that sounds to me you're thinking that I'm crazy because I'm gonna jump off the ladder yeah I was gonna get someone to steady it well it's it can be dangerous like I said I've had my nose opened up and fixed and it's a little insane, but it's also very intoxicating.

[2195] It's fun.

[2196] It's a very exciting game.

[2197] Now, about now you don't do it?

[2198] Sure, I do.

[2199] Wow.

[2200] Yeah, well, the only thing that's stopping right now is I have this little disc issue.

[2201] Yeah.

[2202] But the disc is getting a lot better.

[2203] It's pretty close.

[2204] You've got to get it taken care of it.

[2205] No, it's not, it's not like, it was only a few millimeters, the bulge.

[2206] Oh, okay.

[2207] So it was something that with spinal decompression and a bunch different things.

[2208] I actually saw mine the last, on the MRI, and it was like a comedic.

[2209] It looked like a bicycle tire.

[2210] It was that big.

[2211] Do you remember how many millimeters or poked it?

[2212] No, I mean, it was like, they put on the MRI and the two doctors go, oh, who, like they were like, oh, yeah, it was like, I said, okay, I go.

[2213] Mine is actually asymptomatic right now.

[2214] It's just stiff, and it's just, it's getting better.

[2215] But these things are the things, this is the problem.

[2216] The problem?

[2217] The problem is by the time you figure out how to do it, what makes you happy, the wheels start falling off.

[2218] You were just telling me you might need to get glasses.

[2219] I mean, it's...

[2220] Yeah, no, I definitely should get reading glass.

[2221] Well, I have actually reading glasses.

[2222] Like, when I look at things, like, anything that close is kind of blurry.

[2223] Like, right there, that's blurry.

[2224] But, like, my computer's fine.

[2225] Like, I can read everything on the computer.

[2226] It's things that are close.

[2227] Well...

[2228] My phone sometimes, like, sometimes when I wake up, I can't read a number.

[2229] I'm like, how the fuck?

[2230] Like, if I have to actually dial it on my home phone, I'm just looking at, like, what is that?

[2231] It's weird.

[2232] Then I have to go like that.

[2233] It's the cruel...

[2234] cruel joke of time yeah time's a motherfucker it uh you know i i i hate to be so cliche but as you get older it's you're like you know that's like i said that's who i compete with now yeah well that's one of the reasons why um i'm not like going i'm not like going wait a second did the grim reaper get a comedy central special motherfucker what do i got to do competing yeah you do wind up thinking you got to get out more shit before you go but conflict is Conflict is what builds everything.

[2235] It's what creates everything.

[2236] It's why anything's interesting.

[2237] Yeah.

[2238] Conflict or just pure enjoyment of whatever you do on that, too.

[2239] That's true.

[2240] Conflict kind of, there's a bunch of things that can move along, right?

[2241] Well, the cool thing is if you stop making the conflict being other people and you use your own demons as the conflict.

[2242] So then you don't have to create, you know.

[2243] Yeah.

[2244] I can sit there and write a screenplay and not go down a, and not go to a terrible place.

[2245] Like, I go, nah, yeah, huh, ah, go back and forth with myself.

[2246] Hmm.

[2247] When you create something like this movie or anything where you write it, do you sometimes, like, get out of it and go, who the fuck wrote that?

[2248] Like, it just almost like it comes from somewhere else.

[2249] Yeah, I think that it's almost like, this sounds really trippy.

[2250] But I think a lot of this stuff, well, here, you're on stage, and you say something that you never said before, And it's not even derivative.

[2251] It's not something, you know what I mean?

[2252] Your buddies and you or you guys discuss is a brand new thought.

[2253] You kind of feel like it's just there already.

[2254] It's like this stream, and then you reach up and you grab it.

[2255] And the big part of it is trying to, I can't believe I'm not on Dilaudid right now.

[2256] But the big part of it is getting yourself out of the way so you can just grab that stuff.

[2257] That's a great way you describe it.

[2258] Because, you know, I'm terrible.

[2259] I'm a failure.

[2260] I'm a hack.

[2261] This has all been done before.

[2262] Nobody likes me. Boohoo.

[2263] You know, it's so exhausting.

[2264] And that stuff's just having a big ego in reverse.

[2265] You know, it's still a big ego.

[2266] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[2267] You're thinking about yourself instead of thinking about what you're doing or going zen and focusing on.

[2268] Yeah, yeah, just make stuff.

[2269] That should be a shirt.

[2270] You know, make stuff or, you know, the other cliche, which is true, you know, you're feeling bad, you know.

[2271] You want you do something good.

[2272] Yeah, this, did you ever read any of Pressfield stuff, like the War of Art?

[2273] He talks about the muse, you know, and he talks about it and treats it like it's a real thing.

[2274] And it's kind of an interesting idea because what, you know, people think of the muse, you know, that, like, the idea is that there's something that gives you these ideas or something that you pay tribute to and then it gives you ideas.

[2275] Right.

[2276] And he actually sort of actively courts it, like he actively, like, says, like, you know, I'm going to respect the muse.

[2277] I'm going to show up at work every day.

[2278] You know, and I'm going to put in the hours, and when I put in the hours, the muse will come.

[2279] And, like, he sort of, his philosophy on it is very enlightening, and it's also very, um, the, it's, it's, it's inspiring, because it makes you want to write.

[2280] It makes you want to create, it makes you want to, like, that attitude is a very beneficial attitude to have.

[2281] It's sort of spiritual and mumbo -jumbo and kind of crazy.

[2282] No, that's not.

[2283] I say the nicest compliment I've ever received, uh, is this friend of mine who, uh, Tom Link, I think, and he, and he, he, He saw a movie of mine, and he said, I want to go right.

[2284] Yeah, that's great.

[2285] And I was like, oh, that's nice.

[2286] I always feel that way when I go to see a good comedy.

[2287] And the cynical me is like, what, he thought he could do better?

[2288] A dirty prick.

[2289] Why is he going to know?

[2290] No, I was like, that was the nicest thing anyone's ever said, I think, after a movie.

[2291] Yeah, that is one of the coolest things about other artists that they inspire you to create more of it.

[2292] I truly don't know when I'm making these movies what they're about.

[2293] later on, I'll say, oh, that's this character, that's this person in my life, and I have no idea until after they're done, and I'm watching him.

[2294] Like, my wife was like, you didn't get that this is just prettier people playing you and me in this movie?

[2295] I was like, I'm a fucking idiot.

[2296] Yeah, it is.

[2297] Well, listen, man, your movie's fucking badass, and I really wish you all the best in the world.

[2298] I will cherish these Bigfoot socks.

[2299] Got some Bigfoot socks.

[2300] For the rest of my life.

[2301] And that posters are really rad.

[2302] My friend, Alex party made him and we'll get one framed and we'll put it up on the Hall of Fame here and it's called Willow Creek and if anybody wants to see it what will be the availability it's still in some festivals and as soon as I get a distribution of some level I'd love to come back probably I'd like to come back before that fuck yeah dude anytime and please if there's anybody out there that has anything to do with the movie business just check this out it's fucking great you're gonna enjoy the shit out of it and it's we need fun movies It's a fun movie.

[2303] It's exciting.

[2304] Thanks.

[2305] I'm not going to say any more about it.

[2306] And you don't either, man. Yeah, I know.

[2307] I can't.

[2308] It's one of those movies where you can't say, oh, I love that scene.

[2309] Can't even say it.

[2310] Enjoy the shit out of it, ladies and gentlemen.

[2311] It's called Willow Creek, and we'll keep you updated as far as whatever Bob gets, whatever distribution, we'll tweet it.

[2312] We'll put it out there for you.

[2313] I know people are going to want to check this out.

[2314] And if people want to get in touch with you or see any of your shit, do you have a website?

[2315] No, Grandpa's on Instagram.

[2316] That's about it.

[2317] What's the Instagram?

[2318] It's just Bobcat Goldthwaite, all one word.

[2319] It's hard to spell, but, you know.

[2320] You can figure it out, folks.

[2321] So I'm on Instagram, and I'm pretty close to pulling the trigger on the Twitter, maybe.

[2322] Ah, do it, please.

[2323] Come on, man, do it.

[2324] Okay.

[2325] We'll pump you up.

[2326] We'll have a contest to see how many Twitter followers we can get you in a day.

[2327] You have, like, a million?

[2328] Yeah.

[2329] I think it's a little more than that.

[2330] You're like, hey, man, who's in the numbers?

[2331] It's over a million, okay?

[2332] I don't know what it is now.

[2333] I don't know what it is.

[2334] I don't know what it is.

[2335] All I know is I'm pretty close to 9 ,000 Instagram.

[2336] Whatever.

[2337] 9 ,000.

[2338] 9 ,000 people looking at pictures of my cats.

[2339] Yeah, there's a lot of pictures of my cat, Squeaky Frum, and my underpants.

[2340] Your cat is named Squeaky Frum?

[2341] Yeah, because...

[2342] I had a dog named Squeaky Frum.

[2343] Did you really?

[2344] Yes, yes.

[2345] Girl?

[2346] Yeah.

[2347] Did you redhead?

[2348] No, so female pit bull.

[2349] Well, because she was red, and I found her wandering the streets of Hollywood, just like Manson.

[2350] Well, my dog killed two dogs.

[2351] That's a pretty bad ass dogs.

[2352] She's kind of crazy dogs.

[2353] She's killed a boy.

[2354] dog.

[2355] She's not really...

[2356] She's not around anymore.

[2357] Yeah, she's not really Squeaky Fromm then.

[2358] We had to take her out of the loop.

[2359] She was awesome, though.

[2360] She loved me. Anyway...

[2361] Squeaky Frown's my best friend.

[2362] I used to love Squeaky Fromm, my dog, too, so it's all good.

[2363] She's a troubled childhood.

[2364] I got her after a...

[2365] I got her a little too late.

[2366] I got her where she was already a year old and already crazy.

[2367] That cat, I actually found...

[2368] Well, we'll wrap it up.

[2369] We'll talk about my cats to next time.

[2370] I got a lot...

[2371] I can go on for hours.

[2372] Bob Cat Goldway, ladies and gentlemen.

[2373] I know we asked to pee, so we're going to wrap this motherfucker up nice and tidy he's going to be uh you can see me on comics unleashed with byron alan don't do it thanks to stamps .com use the code word jr e and save yourself some money thanks to ting go to rogan dot ting dot com to save yourself some cash as well something's wrong with my Microsoft word what the fuck is happening here um and thanks to who else was on this one stamps dot com oh legal zoom Yeah, legal Zoom, bitches.

[2374] That's the newest one.

[2375] Legal Zoom is our newest sponsor.

[2376] And if you go to LegalZoom .com and use the code word J -R -E, you'll save yourself something like...

[2377] No, it's Rogan.

[2378] That's it.

[2379] Yeah.

[2380] Legal Zoom, to get a special discount from listening to the podcast, enter the code name Rogan in the referral box for checkout for more savings.

[2381] Thanks to Onet .com as well.

[2382] Go to OnN -N -N -I -T and use the code name Rogan.

[2383] be back tomorrow with my pal Aubrey Marcus, and that'll be it for the week, because I've got to go out squatching.

[2384] I'm not done.

[2385] I'm still, I'm looking for I got a lot of crazy shit going I know I'm going in the fall.

[2386] Are you really?

[2387] Yeah.

[2388] How dare you?

[2389] Bobcat Goldthwaite.

[2390] Thank you.

[2391] See you guys.

[2392] We love you.

[2393] Big kiss.