Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend XX
[0] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[1] Want to talk to Conan?
[2] Visit team cocoa .com slash call Conan.
[3] Okay, let's get started.
[4] Hi, O 'Henya, meet Conan and Sona.
[5] Hi, guys, who are you?
[6] Hi, O 'Henia.
[7] Am I pronouncing your name correctly?
[8] Oh, my God, right off the bat.
[9] Yeah.
[10] You did.
[11] Yes.
[12] Well, very nice to see you, O 'Henya.
[13] I'm going to put a little ha there.
[14] Do you like that?
[15] Do you like, O 'Henya?
[16] That was going to be my trick to teach you, you know, like Hohmah.
[17] or just like the Hebrew way of pronouncing things?
[18] I am fluent in Spanish, as you probably have heard.
[19] Well, there goes my opportunity to teach you Spanish.
[20] No, I could always get better because I'm far from fluent.
[21] So, but I'm told I have a fine accent.
[22] So, you know, we'll discover that ourselves, yes.
[23] Oh, Henia, tell me a little bit about yourself.
[24] Where are you right now?
[25] Well, I'm in Cordoba, Argentina.
[26] That's the second largest city.
[27] That sounds so beautiful.
[28] That's so nice.
[29] Let me say that.
[30] Cordoba, Argentina.
[31] Cordoba.
[32] That's where I think.
[33] Cordoba.
[34] Cordoba.
[35] Ah, Cordoba.
[36] No, I swear to God, I feel like if I had grown up in Cordoba, I would have many lovers.
[37] Because, you know, just saying Cordoba fills me with passion.
[38] Well, yes.
[39] There's two cities called Cordoba.
[40] There's one here and one in Spain.
[41] I haven't been to that one.
[42] I'm sure mine is better.
[43] Yeah, I've heard terrible things about...
[44] Sure.
[45] And they just say Cordoba, Spain.
[46] That's how it's pronounced there.
[47] But you are, Cordoba, Argentina.
[48] I love it.
[49] I just absolutely love it.
[50] Tell me, what's it like there?
[51] What's it like in Cordoba?
[52] Oh, it's beautiful.
[53] Beautiful weather.
[54] It doesn't get too cold.
[55] I mean, the cold as it gets in the winter, I would say it would be like a crisp fall day in New York.
[56] Right.
[57] You know?
[58] Summers get get really, really hot.
[59] Like the hottest days we've had, I think it would be like the high 90s, I would say, because I have to do the conversion that I can't do math, really.
[60] That's okay.
[61] But it's a beautiful city.
[62] It's the second largest city.
[63] So it's not as big as one of the sight is, but it's big enough.
[64] We have everything.
[65] And it's a big student city because we have a lot of colleges here.
[66] so people from all over the country and from other places in Latin America come to school here.
[67] So you're saying that Cordoba gets very hot and it's filled with young people.
[68] Yes.
[69] Well, I'm just saying.
[70] Hot and sweaty.
[71] I'm sorry.
[72] I'm extrapolating.
[73] In your mind, this entire city is like a late -night foam party rave.
[74] Yes.
[75] I'm sorry.
[76] But I'm just, tell me if I'm wrong.
[77] And, Ogenia, my friends will tell you I am not perverted in any way.
[78] No, we won't say that.
[79] Please.
[80] We'll edit that out But my point is that young people must be taking their clothes off all the time and walking around and very revealing But you're not a pervert Just give O 'Henia a chance to talk Yes, O 'Haninca If the mood strikes Yes, yes And also probably a culture that isn't ashamed of their bodies a culture that's very comfortable Just look at your posture right now How high your shoulders are I became Mr. Burns.
[81] I know.
[82] Exactly.
[83] I'll do you one better.
[84] Like one more detail to this scenario you're correctly building, I would say.
[85] We drink matte, which is like a very hot beverage.
[86] And we drink it all year long.
[87] So it doesn't matter if it's like 100 degrees.
[88] We have a hot beverage, which makes everybody hotter, I would say, probably.
[89] Yes, yes, yes.
[90] Incredible.
[91] So do you have a beach there in Kordoba?
[92] Are you on the ocean or there's no beach?
[93] No. there's no beach we're smack in the middle okay so no need to wear a bathing suit i suppose but we have tons of rivers tons of rivers there are like 20 minutes away 20 minutes away yeah all right well maybe i'll put on my speedo and go down on the river yeah do some tube and yeah i'll do some sexy you won't stand out at all yeah you'll blend in with the argentin yeah ohania please tell me you brought it up so i think i'm allowed to ask Ogenia, how would I blend in and would I blend in it all and be honest in Argentina?
[94] I'll give you so one clear example I dated an American guy and he came to live here for like a year and a half and he is a ginger and very, very white you might relate to that.
[95] He wasn't as tall as you but everybody do.
[96] He was a gringo, you know?
[97] Or a yank.
[98] We call We call them Yankees.
[99] I don't know why, but everybody that's American, people call them junkies, which sounds different.
[100] Do you think I'd have any chance of convincing them that, no, I am from Cordoba.
[101] My name is Conando.
[102] Is there any way that I would be able to convince them, do you think?
[103] Or it just wouldn't work?
[104] I think so.
[105] I think so because, you know, Argentinians are a mix of many, many different cultures.
[106] So there's not like one stereotype, stereotypical Argentinian.
[107] But yeah, I think that if, I mean, you're a star, man. I mean, people know who you are.
[108] Thank you.
[109] But I think that, I think that, oh, sorry, I think with your growing accent or lack thereof, your beautiful, if you learn Argentinian Spanish, which is a different type of Spanish, sort of a little bit, And you have a matte and you just like walk around with a matte.
[110] I think I think you could blend in.
[111] Yeah, no shirt.
[112] But you've probably got to change like your, you're like comfort with your naked body.
[113] I know.
[114] I am very uptight.
[115] But I think if I could come down to Cordoba, I believe and have some matte and wander around without my shirt on, I think and convince myself.
[116] that I'm Argentinian.
[117] I mean, you could tell people, yes, he is Argentinian.
[118] He's just quite ill. I'll vouch for you.
[119] I'll vouch for you.
[120] No question that.
[121] He doesn't have enough platelets.
[122] I'll vouch for you.
[123] People are already doing that for you here in the States, aren't they?
[124] Yeah, exactly.
[125] I get that here, but we really have to ramp it up.
[126] Like, he's missing several organs.
[127] He doesn't have long to live.
[128] This is his make -a -wish.
[129] Well, it could work because I live, like, in a hospital area.
[130] There's like five hospitals around, so, like, it could work with our eye.
[131] You could get me an IV, and I could walk around with it and go, I am from Cordoba.
[132] I'm not well.
[133] I'm waiting on a melanin transport.
[134] You're merging from, like, the accent, the correct accent to a vampire accent.
[135] You're doing a way to a vampire accent.
[136] Hey, I have a question for you.
[137] Your English is superb.
[138] How did you learn English?
[139] Do you learn in school?
[140] Oh, it's a funny story.
[141] No, I didn't.
[142] So I learned when I was a kid without really knowing by watching television.
[143] My brother was going to an exchange student program in the U .S. And then the host family called the day before.
[144] And my mom didn't speak any English.
[145] And I walked through the door.
[146] And I had had like, I don't know, maybe a few English classes for school, which is basically nothing, honestly.
[147] And then I just picked up the phone and started talking.
[148] And that's how we all realized that I could speak English, including myself.
[149] Wow.
[150] That's incredible.
[151] It hasn't happened with anything else.
[152] But so I think it's later on, I got diagnosed with ADHD.
[153] So I believe I was hyper -focusing.
[154] Yes.
[155] And my parents let me watch too much television.
[156] And I watched Seinfeld and I watched Matt about you and friends with supplements.
[157] titles, and I just, I picked it up, I guess.
[158] You know, that's fascinating because you're, I've talked to many people in different countries, and you're not the first who said that they learned English from watching American television.
[159] Sona came.
[160] Oh, no. No, when she came to America, she watched primarily Silver Spoons, I think, and, too close for comfort.
[161] Yeah, and how did I get here?
[162] I think on, by sea, it's the only way to get here, a ship, a raft or something.
[163] A raft or a ship?
[164] Oh, okay.
[165] We all straightened it out.
[166] She's legal now, and she learned the language.
[167] But I think it's amazing that you picked that all up from, you must know episodes of Seinfeld by heart.
[168] I loved it.
[169] I loved it.
[170] And if I had been fortunate enough to be able to watch Conan since I was a kid, I would have learned many more things.
[171] But on the other hand, I get to watch a lot of the things from previous years of Conan.
[172] Good.
[173] I don't know why I'm talking to you, like you're not there, but you are.
[174] A lot of people, a lot of people talk.
[175] My wife does that a lot.
[176] She says, what are we going to do about Conan?
[177] And I'm just sitting in the corner eating applesauce.
[178] You're a prominent part of my life.
[179] I don't know if you can see.
[180] Oh, look.
[181] I'm right behind you.
[182] That's so cool.
[183] Is that a drawing?
[184] Yes.
[185] Did you do that drawing?
[186] It's a hand drawing.
[187] No, my boyfriend gave me that as a birthday present.
[188] He had a friend who's like, no, no, no. He knows his place.
[189] He knows he comes after Coden.
[190] Oh, nice.
[191] Oh, I am coming to Cordoba.
[192] What do you do for work?
[193] So I was a copywriter for many years.
[194] I worked in advertising, much like Mrs. Liza Powell O 'Brien.
[195] That's right.
[196] My wife was when I met her was an ad copywriter.
[197] That's right.
[198] But then I switched careers completely, and I, now I do operations for a poker company for an American poker company.
[199] Wow.
[200] And I do not know how to play poker.
[201] So you can't play poker yourself, but you work at a poker playing company.
[202] I mean, I had to learn the very basics of it.
[203] And then this is, so the, it's a poker teaching company.
[204] So we have courses, very advanced courses based in math and statistics.
[205] and it's really, really advanced and awesome, so I can't follow any of them.
[206] So I help everybody with, like, their courses.
[207] Like, if they're missing something, they're billing.
[208] And I help my boss, who's the chillest boss in the world.
[209] Shout out to James.
[210] Must be nice.
[211] So.
[212] It doesn't sound like much of a boss to me. So, yeah.
[213] It's all that palsy -wowsy.
[214] So what's going on in your life?
[215] I don't want to get too personal, but I also want to know everything about you.
[216] Ohenia, you have this boyfriend.
[217] Do you guys live together?
[218] We do not.
[219] We do not.
[220] And I have a huge house.
[221] I'm just a loner.
[222] I don't want to.
[223] Wait, you have a big house?
[224] I have a big house.
[225] That's why it might sound a little echoy here.
[226] I'm sorry, I don't have many furnitures in the office.
[227] But, yeah, it's a five -bedroom house.
[228] Wow.
[229] Wait a minute.
[230] You are a single woman.
[231] You have a boyfriend, but he doesn't live with you.
[232] And you live in a five -bedroom house?
[233] I do.
[234] I do.
[235] He does have his own room.
[236] My boyfriend does have his own room.
[237] Wait a minute.
[238] You said you don't live.
[239] I do have a heart, you know.
[240] But he doesn't live with you.
[241] He doesn't live with you.
[242] He does not.
[243] But he has a room that he's assigned to go to when he comes in visits.
[244] So he doesn't stay in your room with you when he comes over there.
[245] No, because I have two dogs.
[246] They're so big and I sleep with my dogs.
[247] Wait a minute.
[248] I'm a loner.
[249] He likes me. He likes me as I am.
[250] Ohenia.
[251] No. Listen, I'm not trying to be crazy.
[252] I'm trying to help you.
[253] I like this.
[254] But your boyfriend comes over, and this is a, you're young people.
[255] He's coming over to see you, but because you have dogs in a big house, you make him sleep in a separate room.
[256] That doesn't sound very romantic.
[257] And you, you are living in Cordoba.
[258] I'm a catch.
[259] I'm a catch.
[260] I mean, he knows that that's the price to pay to be with me. I mean, I'm a pretty cool otherwise.
[261] But he's also not with you.
[262] He's in a different room.
[263] in the mansion.
[264] He's adjacent to you.
[265] Yeah.
[266] And when he's with me, he brings me Conan portraits because he knows where my priorities lie.
[267] Nothing more erotic than that.
[268] Oh, Hania, okay, I'm curious.
[269] Are you going to fix up your house?
[270] Is your house going to be all fixed up?
[271] I redid the kitchen and one of the bathrooms because this is like a three -story house and the bottom floor is not mine.
[272] I have like the two top floors.
[273] So the bathroom had was like had problems with the plumbing and stuff.
[274] So we had to like take it all down and build it again.
[275] And I moved here.
[276] But then I didn't decorate.
[277] I didn't bring a lot of furniture because you have to fill like a five bedroom house.
[278] You have to fill it.
[279] And I don't have enough, enough furniture.
[280] So do you have a Conan room?
[281] That's why it sounds so echoy.
[282] Do you have a room that's ready for me?
[283] I mean, I could.
[284] I mean, if Conan wants to come here, Yeah, he'll have his room, definitely.
[285] What would we, tell me, Ohana, let's say I did come visit you.
[286] What would we do?
[287] So this is a beautiful city because we, so it's a city, it's pretty busy.
[288] But then we're like 20 minutes away from like mountains and rivers and lakes.
[289] So it's pretty nice, either summer and winter.
[290] I've seen mountains and lakes and stuff.
[291] This might be interesting right across the street from.
[292] my house.
[293] I can see it right now.
[294] There's an Armenian restaurant.
[295] So, Sona, if you come, I'll come.
[296] I have.
[297] Okay.
[298] That's terrific.
[299] Can I go?
[300] Yeah, no, well, listen, we'll see, Sona.
[301] Well, I'd like you to pay for me to go to Cordoba.
[302] I'll take care of it.
[303] What I'm more interested in, and you mentioned beautiful lakes and rivers and streams, but I want to hit the clubs.
[304] I mean, you're talking about a very young city, and I would like to hit the clubs and maybe you and your boyfriend would come along.
[305] Tell me about your boyfriend.
[306] What's he like?
[307] He is awesome.
[308] He's 10 years younger than me. I am 37, so it's not like a dangerous situation.
[309] He's 27.
[310] Wait, what do you mean?
[311] It's not a dangerous situation.
[312] Do women start killing their mate when they hit 40?
[313] Is that what happened?
[314] Yes.
[315] I meant illegal because I might seem very young, but I'm 37.
[316] Oh, well, 37's young, I believe.
[317] So there you go.
[318] It is, it is.
[319] I mean, I'm learning so much about you.
[320] I still don't think you, you haven't sold me. I like you a lot.
[321] You seem like a really nice person.
[322] Okay, except you've got this guy in your life.
[323] And he, what's his name again?
[324] Martin.
[325] Martin.
[326] Martin.
[327] Yes.
[328] Martin.
[329] I must go to Cordoba and I must face Martin.
[330] Martin.
[331] I just want to know about what we would do together.
[332] And like I say, I want to go out and hit the nightlife.
[333] It must be a very vibrant nightlife.
[334] Yes.
[335] So, I mean, we could hit the clubs and I will.
[336] So over the summer is really cool because the clubs open in the mountainside.
[337] Oh.
[338] So you're dancing up until 6 a .m. With, like, the mountain as one of the walls of the club, right?
[339] that's so cool so that's available I don't really do it but I would do it for you I mean I'm your right or die while we're here but I don't do I didn't even do it when I was like 18 man but like I will I didn't do anything when I was 18 take one for the team I didn't leave my room till I was 27 so this all I was packed in heavy cream and refrigerated this this sounds very exciting to me now you're selling me on this I don't want to hear about lakes and rivers and oh there's a museum martin will show you no none of that i want clubs i want this macha this special drink that we have mate matte okay i want matte and i want uh clubs and i want to wear very little clothing and i want to liberate myself i want to be a new conan not the uptight conan that came from boston but the conan that lives in cordoba argentina you know that's that's who I want to be.
[340] Is that too much to ask?
[341] I like that for you.
[342] At this late stage in my life?
[343] No, I like that for you.
[344] I'm 41 years old.
[345] It's time I...
[346] You don't have Wikipedia available in South America, do you?
[347] Good.
[348] So at 41, I want to really spread my wings.
[349] When I lie, my...
[350] Do you have a big birthday coming up?
[351] Oh, thanks a lot for telling everyone.
[352] Yes, 42.
[353] By wings, you mean just hanging flesh for me. I love that my tell when I'm lying is that I drink completely out of the side of my mouth in an unnatural way.
[354] Me?
[355] Why, 41?
[356] Oh, oh, oh.
[357] Oh, hey, Nia, it's been very nice talking to you.
[358] You seem like a lovely person.
[359] Thank you.
[360] And, you know, if there's any way I can ever help you, maybe I will.
[361] I do suggest that you, it's pretty drab that color behind you.
[362] You know, it's just white.
[363] Maybe that should change.
[364] You want to come and paint?
[365] I mean, I was going to, one of the activities that I was going to do, I was going to come in paint.
[366] Smart guy.
[367] No, one of the activities.
[368] What do you want me to go?
[369] Why don't I move the furniture?
[370] I'll move a piano for you too.
[371] Why that we're at it?
[372] You just want to put me to work, don't you?
[373] Well, I mean, I was going to teach you how to sew, but that was like you wanted to go clubbing.
[374] So I guess we'll go clubbing.
[375] Maybe this is like a karate kid thing where you have to study under her and you have to do certain chores and tasks and then you don't realize you're ready for the club because you've been painting, but actually what you're doing is dancing.
[376] Yes, that's right.
[377] That's right.
[378] Oh, that's right.
[379] Look at that.
[380] I'm going to be painting and I'm going to be moving furniture.
[381] Do that again.
[382] See, that's going to crush it in the cabs.
[383] Look at them.
[384] I'm going to be doing this.
[385] And then later on, you'll say, Conan, I'll be bitter and I'll say, Oh, Hena.
[386] You said you'd bring me to the clubs, but all I've done is push and paint.
[387] And you'll say, Conan, now you are ready.
[388] Who is this Argentinian?
[389] Yes.
[390] Who is this very sick?
[391] And I'll say, I have a high white blood cell count.
[392] And everyone in the club will be holding glow sticks.
[393] So they have glow sticks in Cordoba.
[394] Yeah, and the mountain clubs they do.
[395] Yes, well, they come from the mountains.
[396] That's where glowsticks are mined.
[397] Yeah, they only grow at a certain elevation.
[398] Yeah, to come and cut them at the right height.
[399] Listen, I feel like a fool, but, Ohana, I'm very proud that you, are you been listening to the podcast?
[400] Is that it?
[401] Or do you watch the clips on YouTube?
[402] So I first, I've always seen, you know, little clips here and there, but I saw the documentary back in 2012.
[403] And that's how I just like became like a diehard fan of Conan.
[404] And then I watched the show while I was in New York for a few months.
[405] And then just the clips and the the podcast and everything I can get my hands on.
[406] Well, Ogenia, very nice.
[407] What's your full name, Ogenia?
[408] Maria Eugenia.
[409] Maria Ogenia.
[410] So, O 'Henia is your last name.
[411] No, no. Maria, Ogenia Cincovich, Falco.
[412] Wow.
[413] That's beautiful.
[414] Maria Ogenia Cincovich, Falco, you must find it.
[415] Oh, my God.
[416] Right?
[417] Never thought I would hear those words.
[418] Come out of your mouth.
[419] Well, me neither, frankly.
[420] Frankly, there was never reason for it to happen before today.
[421] Yeah, yeah, exactly.
[422] That's not a sentence that comes out much.
[423] Well, very nice talking to you.
[424] And yes, we got to get some color.
[425] We got to get some color in that.
[426] that house and then we got to hit the clubs.
[427] Okay?
[428] Yes.
[429] Come to Argentina and now there were best friends.
[430] Well, best friends.
[431] I've got to make a few calls.
[432] But yes, you're very close to best.
[433] We'll see what happens.
[434] We'll see how it goes in the clubs.
[435] You have to call Tim Oliphant and tell him I took his place.
[436] You just made Tim Oliphant very happy.
[437] That guy loves a shout out.
[438] Okay, Ohana, thank you very much and have a lovely day, night, whatever's happening where you are.
[439] Thank you.
[440] Have a wonderful day.
[441] Bye.
[442] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[443] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Goorley.
[444] Produced by me, Matt Goorley.
[445] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Solitaireff, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson at Earwolf.
[446] Music by Jimmy Vivino.
[447] Supervising producer Aaron Blair.
[448] Associate talent producer Jennifer Samples.
[449] Associate producers Sean Doherty and Lisa Burm.
[450] Engineering by Eduardo Perez.
[451] Please rate, review, and subscribe.
[452] to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.
[453] This has been a team Coco production in association with Stitcher.