MFM Minisode 2

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] Hey, this is exciting.

[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.

[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[5] Who killed Saz?

[6] And were they really after Charles?

[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[8] This season, murder hits close to home.

[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[14] Only murders in the building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[15] Goodbye.

[16] This is my favorite murder.

[17] Minisode, hometown minisode.

[18] It's a minisode, guys, so don't get involved.

[19] keep it light and get ready to move on quickly.

[20] Don't, if you're on like a quick treadmill run or you have like a quick commute or someone's telling you a boring story, you can just throw in an airbud.

[21] Yep.

[22] And just real quick, listen to some murder stories.

[23] Okay, these are ones that you guys have sent into my favorite murder at Gmail that I'm going to read to Karen.

[24] Awesome.

[25] Yeah, I haven't read these.

[26] Okay.

[27] So these will be a fun surprise.

[28] Yeah.

[29] Let's see here.

[30] So about a week ago, I was with, this is from John.

[31] But a week ago was with my girlfriend and we came, we were at my sister's house and not sure how it came up, but we started talking about the murder of my best friend at the time, Eric Juiced, J -O -O -O -S -T, when I was a kid.

[32] We grew up in a small suburb outside of Austin.

[33] Basically, we were both in 10th, we were both 10 at the time and in fifth grade.

[34] His dad was the coach for the soccer team.

[35] We were both on as well as some other friends.

[36] Our families were close and we had slumber parties.

[37] He lived with his parents and younger sisters who I think were four at the time.

[38] they always had awesome birthday parties basically they were a model family he's not going to go well nope so after one weekend in the spring and no one hears from them um they send someone over to check on them something was fishy so they called the local police whole family's dead triple murder suicide is what they ruled they said that the dad went through the house and shot them all and then in their sleep which like uh and then off themselves.

[39] So, oh, but then, so right there, it seems plausible that he did it, obviously, but the family swears the dad would never do that, and I can't see how either, he says.

[40] And the bumbling local yokel cops, here we go again, walked around through the crime scene and messed up a lot of evidence.

[41] But another weird thing was that he was in charge or very high up with the Texas horse racing commission.

[42] And so a lot of people speculate that he had some damning evidence or knew some things that maybe there was a hit on him but why would they so that's that well why would they kill the whole family usually they leave someone alive so that something terrible like that has a lasting mark or something right the point is that that you don't give out the evidence right also what's the most obvious answer that the dad killed everyone yeah but if it's too bad there's no other information like then it was revealed that he actually began spedding on horse racing or whatever i bet there is somewhere but these are hometown murder emails you know what sucks about that because we keep reading these stories and we're all so interested in these stories but like it's basically that thing where over and over it's people and people going there's no way this person did it and then they did so then you're just like can anybody do this yeah i mean well you would hope that like the same thing with when we like like learn about serial killers like would we have known right would we have been able to tell immediately I am I don't think so I feel like that science should be science's next step let's stop trying to figure out if wine is good or bad for us or whatever the fuck those studies are and let's get on to like just one of those weird like deodorant strip tests where you can tell somebody's a sociopath or not or a psychopath yeah and I'm sick of like if they look up to the right when they're lying then they're like this and that.

[43] There is that yawn.

[44] Did you hear the yawning theory?

[45] Yes.

[46] I love that.

[47] If you yawn and the person you're with doesn't catch the yawn, which is a natural human instinct, then they might be a sociopath.

[48] But I don't want to believe that.

[49] Why?

[50] Because Vince doesn't yawn.

[51] Like I've tried it a few times now.

[52] Is he paying attention to you, though?

[53] I don't know.

[54] I've like almost done it in his face.

[55] I mean, I feel like that might not be hard science.

[56] I also want to say that I have the most anxiety and I'm constantly looking for ways I'm going to get murdered.

[57] Yes.

[58] So this is obviously just my anxiety.

[59] And husband is your number one, your number one guy.

[60] Right.

[61] And anything else he's ever done in our relationship has not been even close to a sociopathic action.

[62] No, he is one of the most empathetic people I've ever met.

[63] And sympathetic.

[64] Very good person.

[65] Very empathetic.

[66] and very yeah he's very he's the guy that like when a group situation is happening he's thinking for the group yeah that's that's a person that isn't he'll interfere with chaos to like chill it out yes no he's good people yeah he takes care of the most anxious fucking wife in it in the world and he's very sweet about it he's a goddamn saint so good for so yawning so don't believe it don't believe the yawn okay here's a good let's see Well, here's a Girl Scouts one that I really liked That I immediately thought was going to be the girls who got killed at the Girl Scout camp But it wasn't There's a good generation Y about that that you recommended to me Right, that's a good one So this girl, her name is Andrea says I think this is my first, the first murder story I remember It's from Nashville, Tennessee And it was in the 70s Let's see So this girl is okay, in 1975 Marsha Trimble was nine years old in Girl Scouts knocking on doors selling those damn addictive cookies she went missing and they didn't find her body until about 30 days later um if being murdered wasn't bad enough she was found on easter sunday i don't know what that means because i'm jewish so i don't understand the significance of that but i'll explain the bible to you later would you mind uh they did not find the killer until 33 years later oh so can i guess is it someone that was like a pillar of the community?

[67] No. I ended up looking it up.

[68] If you walk up to anyone in the 40s or older in Nashville, they will remember that little girl.

[69] It was ingrained in us by our parents to never go knocking on anyone's door.

[70] No shit.

[71] Yeah, good lesson.

[72] I can't believe that they let us just knock on doors.

[73] Oh, and she says, I can't be positive, but I think this is why Girl Scouts now sell together at tables at grocery stores.

[74] Yeah.

[75] Dude, I fucking tried to sell.

[76] Like, my school would be like, go sell this wrapping paper from door to door or you're not going to be able to go to the like camp yes listen it was only whatever 30 years ago but it was as if it was the dark ages the way people approached uh how children should be in the world yeah it's hilarious they were just i feel like they must have been trying to thin out the herd i mean yeah there's something to it where we have a very high population overcrowding in classrooms oh my god and they're so loud and when they get together and they scream because it's so obvious it's idiotic yes no it's remember for a while after like um you know adam walsh disappeared and all the 80s heyday of oh my god this happens and this is crazy there was a thing where it was um there were certain safe houses if a house in my town they had this paloma if there was a house with a certain sticker in the front window and you were in trouble you could go and knock on that door and go to that house of safe like someone was following you yes the look on your face is exactly right georgia hardstock who's nodding her head because the people who want to eat children get those stickers first.

[77] Like that's the most obvious like clearly that's the murderer, rapist child molester.

[78] It's basically saying, do you need ingredients for your child's stew?

[79] We just set up a governmental program for you.

[80] We're just going to have them like, it's like cows to the slaughter.

[81] We're just going to have them on a conveyor belt go into this quote safe house.

[82] Yeah.

[83] Because the first, I remember as a kid seeing that and being like, that's so cool because if I'm scared or whatever.

[84] And then I was just like, I don't know.

[85] who would do like that's totally my mom's voice of like oh jesus who'd get involved who'd do that yeah i don't want kids on my porch actually kids are gross yeah um whether there is the i remember hearing if you're ever in trouble or someone's following you or something's like go to a woman and ask her for help yeah which is so sad that it's like don't go to a man because a man even a cop it was like don't go to a cop it was like go to a cop what i don't know this is that person had been hurt badly yeah they were very bitter go to a woman yeah i don't know ask a woman for help although i guess they're pretty weak and me if they came to me i'd be like what did you do what did you do to ask for this yeah wouldn't you were you shooting off your mouth hey this is exciting an all new season of only murders in the building is coming to hulu on august 27th Steve martin martin short and selina gomez are back as your favorite podcaster detectives but there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[86] Who killed Saz?

[87] And were they really after Charles?

[88] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[89] This season, murder hits close to home.

[90] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[91] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[92] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[93] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[94] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, Davey, Joy, Randolph, Molly Shannon and more.

[95] Only Martyrs in the building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[96] Goodbye.

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[117] Goodbye.

[118] Oh, so here's a recent thing that's going on that this girl, Cassandra, wrote in.

[119] She, of course, found us through Cracked.

[120] Thank you, Cracked podcast.

[121] Cracked podcast.

[122] So she's from Calgary, Canada.

[123] Oh, Calgary up in Manitoba.

[124] What?

[125] Remember when I did the bus murder and I was like, the information I gave out about Canada was severely incorrect.

[126] I mean, you can't get everything right.

[127] I think I have like a roughly like a sixth grade education.

[128] So please keep that in mind when you listen to this podcast.

[129] I stopped paying attention in like third grade.

[130] So then, yeah, sixth is like, because they're.

[131] you went through the rest of school so the total is like sixth grade total exactly i can't do math to add it up clearly um so the trial for this guy just started yesterday and there's been a publication ban on it since the murder was committed two years ago so the details of the case are just starting to emerge and they're weird last day of school in the university of calgary is called bermuda shorts day what that means what that means they were the nerdiest fucking thing i've ever heard.

[132] That makes me think of high school and hate everything.

[133] Sponsored by Dockers.

[134] Remember that?

[135] Like, weird hair day.

[136] Wear your pajamas day.

[137] Yes.

[138] Where I'm always like, I'm not wearing Bermuda shorts.

[139] I've broken blood vessels on the back of my knees.

[140] I'm from Ireland.

[141] Go fuck yourself.

[142] Yeah.

[143] Okay.

[144] So, and typically all the university students get drunk, wear Bermuda shorts, and all and all just have a good time.

[145] And get raped, probably.

[146] So on Bermuda, Bermuda.

[147] Bermuda.

[148] Bermuda Shorts Day in 2014, this kid named Matthew Degrood went on a massive murder spree.

[149] And he stabbed five people to death.

[150] What?

[151] And I've been seeing, well, because I look at the Facebook feed that there's been like photos of them up and like they're just all sweet university kids.

[152] Oh, wait.

[153] I think I saw that same article today.

[154] Four dudes and a woman and a girl got killed.

[155] The police sent the dogs.

[156] He killed them all at random at a house party.

[157] The police sent the dogs out after him once they got to the scene and found him not very far away.

[158] What was strange about it was that Matthew Degrood.

[159] was sequestered for psychiatric treatment for an extremely long time following the murders and leading up to the case.

[160] So the mood around campus was crazy, vigils, all of this stuff.

[161] This person says, I definitely cried because they were around my age and could easily have been in the same, I could have easily been at the same parties because I traveled in similar circles.

[162] And I couldn't understand why someone would randomly murder five young people at a party.

[163] When I found out in the news, what, I was going to say how loud, how loud was music, though?

[164] what if you're a neighbor oh yeah they're just they're just blasting it's been one way because they looked at me I'm just saying I hope you had that is not what they play when people graduate let's see when I found out in the slideshow slide show time of your life crying I'm gonna kill you that one little voice I'm gonna kill you I'm gonna kill you I'm gonna kill you I'm gonna murder you since the publication band was lifted some crazy shit has come out basically in the weeks leading up to the murders, Matthew Degrood's mental state seemed to deteriorate completely, sending random text to his parents that made no sense.

[165] I guess he was also searching up, quote, Obama is the Antichrist and looking.

[166] Nothing crazy about that.

[167] And looking into Hitler.

[168] You're just lightly looking into him?

[169] As one does.

[170] Well, I obsessively look into Hitler, so.

[171] I've looked deeply into Hitler.

[172] Thank God I've never Googled Obama as the Antichrist.

[173] I bet some fun websites come up if you do.

[174] I bet some real smart.

[175] Our well -written, interesting websites come up.

[176] I bet nobody mistakes the word there for the word there.

[177] No, I'm never.

[178] Two and two is all correctly.

[179] Loose and loose.

[180] Yeah, always right.

[181] The night of the murders, his friends went to pick him, his friend went to pick him up and take him to the party where the horribleness happened.

[182] DeRood was incoherently babbling about the apocalypse happening at midnight.

[183] Don't take him to a party then.

[184] Yeah.

[185] And donned a pair of latex glove, quote, in case he had to kill someone in the apocalypse.

[186] This friend.

[187] bro seriously he gave his friend a knife and a head of garlic to protect himself in the apocalypse the car over garlic ain't gonna do shit in the apocalypse unless it's used as currency which i could see that happening yes because it's very good for you yeah and like canned food are probably disgusting and you want to spice it up with some garlic that's right garlic would cover a lot of the rotting peas that you'd be eating into eternity absolutely yeah if any of your friends are talking about a the apocalypse be zombies or vampires actually really being in the real world and if they're donning surgical gloves do not go to the party no don't take them to a party call the police and say that you want to have him especially if he's had yeah you want to have him committed for 24 hour watch something's wrong with your friend yeah psych ward emergency room they might hate you and never want to be your friend again but they might also kill five people yeah pick one you got pick one of those two you just got to have your eyes peeled yeah like garlic yes um sometime in the early hours of the morning a bunch of people at the party left to get macdonalds and left the five victims and one sleeping girl alone with de grude from what i understand do you want to hear more of this sure i hate this story but crazy rantings um i can't even they stabbed people oh god um had we've all been at this fucking party it's like the party that kind of won't end but you don't you don't want to be at and you're sleeping off because you can't drive home yeah and you're kind of like it's like a seven beer drunk where you just have a headache yeah you didn't have a good time now you just have a headache you have like an early hangover your pants don't like button all the way because they're just like and you're still hanging out there because you think that one guy might try to make out with you but it's not panning no suddenly and he's like fall down drunk so do you even want to make out with him yeah but you're just trying to like stay in the mix but your friend doesn't want to go home yet.

[188] Or you or your friend went home already and you're like, I'm going to stay.

[189] Yes.

[190] Oh, that the old I'm going to stay.

[191] I'm going to stay.

[192] Never stay behind at a party.

[193] You'll get murdered.

[194] Yeah.

[195] So that's, I mean, more and more.

[196] But there's, you know, it's out in the, um, it's being tried now.

[197] I find the fact that they do a, uh, uh, media hold fascinating.

[198] Oh, because of a jury.

[199] I don't know.

[200] Is that why they do it?

[201] Canada, I guess, right?

[202] Isn't that what you said at the very beginning.

[203] Yeah, and I didn't know that either.

[204] I would guess it's so that the jury can't find out any information, which is like the media here would never let that happen because they make so much money off constantly having information.

[205] And whether it's true or not, they just put it out and then they fact check and other news outlets pick up on that not fact checked information and report it as well.

[206] Then it's all true.

[207] They also guilt the victim's families into giving interviews when they don't want to and then when it's too early I just read this in that and roll book because she was a reporter but she never did that she never interfered with the victim's families but reporters because they had to get their story would go to the families and say tell us the story before somebody else talks about how she, this girl that got murdered by anybody asked for it was slutty in real life like that they would basically threaten the family pretending to be the friend by saying they're going to print a story about how she asked for it you give me the real story and then that's how they get the like tearful interviews from the family it's so ugly whenever i watch those or see those the feckin news reporter just seems like such a shark yeah and like a disgusting person who would and i have to think that they don't want to do it it's their boss making them do it or whatever or and just how they just find themselves in opposition but they always ask questions like how did that make you feel yeah it's like we all know how they feel.

[208] You don't have to make them relive feelings and show feelings.

[209] Especially when that might not be the feeling at the moment.

[210] It could be completely different than what it's supposed to be going on.

[211] Yeah, they could be in some weird stage of grief where they're like, I feel nothing.

[212] Yeah.

[213] I'm completely empty.

[214] Or like, I'm so happy right now.

[215] No, that's not true.

[216] I don't think that's, that's not one of the stages.

[217] I always wonder about the, um, the, um, suspects family and the like, oh, The murder.

[218] Did you ever see this footage from like 48 hours or something where the sister of the murder victim was like trying to get the family to talk to her?

[219] And she was so angry because they wouldn't.

[220] The murderer's family?

[221] Yeah.

[222] Just yelling at them and they were in trial every day supporting him and they're walking down the street and the victim's sister is yelling at them.

[223] And the sister of the murderer turns around walks to her and hugs her and is like, I'm so sorry.

[224] Oh, we're going through a lot too, and I'm really sorry.

[225] Did they both ball their heads off?

[226] Yeah.

[227] Because I'm going to start right now.

[228] I know.

[229] Because everyone's a victim in that situation.

[230] They're not the murderer.

[231] They're horrified.

[232] The wife of the murderer or child molester or rapist, I feel like gets a bad rapist, too.

[233] The worst.

[234] How did she not know?

[235] How did she not do anything when you have to think that they're probably abuse, at least you know mentally abused people yeah something yeah no it's it's super ugly everyone there's so many victims yeah you look like you're about to cry sorry no I'm just feeling low I'm just kidding no no no just that I was so manipulating I just start talking about my own problems my dog is my dog holds me hostage I forgot to pay my gas bill no the image it's the same thing it gets me every time anytime a victim's like father tells a murderer I forgive you have you ever seen those in the courtroom it makes me lose it immediately because it's that's usually when you see one of those people break because they're good at at stealing themselves against hatred and all that but it's that a human connection is the hardest thing.

[236] Yeah.

[237] I always think about how hard having to read a victim statement is at the end of a trial after sentencing or during sentencing because you're not going to get what you want out of it.

[238] No. But yeah.

[239] But yeah, but saying I forgive you.

[240] That's like the biggest punch you can give.

[241] I feel like I'm thinking of there's very specific like forensic files or whatever because the dad that I remember seeing do it had a big gray beard and white.

[242] hair and I think he was wearing rainbow suspenders, I'm not kidding.

[243] And he was clearly like an old hippie dad.

[244] And he said that and I want to say it was to somebody like a BTK or somebody where it's just like, I'm forgiving you because it's for myself.

[245] Totally.

[246] And because this is, you know, we've heard enough.

[247] Hold that anger in your fucking heart.

[248] B 'i.

[249] We need to figure out how to end these podcasts more positive.

[250] What if we just what if we just both start sobbing?

[251] would that be would that make you happy would then we have enough fucking empathy for you well Elvis is far away so I can't have him meow into the microphone I just like the fact that this surprises us every time where it's like we have a podcast about the worst thing ever and uh the end every time we're like yeah yeah that was so that wasn't as funny as I thought it was gonna be well this was a murder miniso which is just a little little gift to the to the actual podcast so go back and listen to the actual podcast yeah there's just something to get you through the week yeah like maybe a monday or t -sday we're putting this up yeah um there's t -shirts my favorite murder shirt shirt my favorite murder shirt dot com might be shirts i don't remember try both try and then tell us what the second one that isn't right brings you to right that would be interesting could be anything um and also we have a patreon if you feel like yeah patreon .com slash my favorite murder and you know other than that stay sexy and don't get murdered bye bye