#1825 - Ali Siddiq

[0] The Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.

[1] The Joe Rogan Experience.

[2] Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day.

[3] The drones are the cigar choice, a short story, and smoking cigars with D .L. So much.

[4] I know a good cigar, Oliver.

[5] Mm. Or a good cigar.

[6] Yeah, this is a solid.

[7] I've had Cuban cigars, and I know they're supposed to be better.

[8] and I believe they're good but I do not know if they're better I can't tell you can lie to me you can give me a good Dominican cigar and I'd be like damn Cuban nice I don't know you know what you like when you like it you know yeah like I like I drink Cabernet and you know how they come to the table when they tell you this valley and this and this is from this yeah and I just said nine ounce And then I like it, I like it, you know.

[9] Yeah.

[10] But, you know, other than that.

[11] There was a documentary, I've talked about this before, but there's a documentary called Sour Grapes, and it's all about wine connoisseurs getting hustled by this dude who figured out how to mix wine to make it taste like old wine, and he put fake labels on them, and he sold them for hundreds of thousands of dollars, millions of dollars worth of wine, this guy sold.

[12] Like bottles for a couple hundred thousand dollars.

[13] and unfortunately he sold a fake bottle to the Coke brothers and one of the Coke brothers someone was like going through their collection what the fuck is this?

[14] And he's like oh that's a bra -r -r -rah -rah and they're like no it's not and then the next thing you know it he gets his wine examined and he's like bro you have a bunch of fake wine in here and then they find out this one dude had been making these fake labels and blending these cheaper wines together to try to create a taste that's similar to really expensive wine that's ridiculous that everything that he went through he could have just made a wine you'd think so but he made millions millions and millions and millions and millions to hustle people but he's he come from a criminal family like when they they went into the whole family of it like the family one of the brothers had stolen a bunch of money out of a bank and like like hundreds of millions of dollars right Wasn't it like some insane amount of money?

[15] Do you remember that part?

[16] And, you know, he's on the run.

[17] He's hiding somewhere.

[18] And, like, so it's like the whole family's been con artists their whole life.

[19] And this guy just figured out a way to get in with these wine people.

[20] Because the way he did it was pretty genius.

[21] First he started going to auctions and buying up really expensive wine.

[22] So he became known in the wine community as this guy, like, oh, he knows.

[23] He knows the wines.

[24] He knows.

[25] And then he said, I'm going to get rid of some of my wines.

[26] No, I don't need, I have too much wine, nowhere to store it.

[27] So I'm going to sell some of my choice wines to, like, Sotheby's.

[28] So they would auction off some of those choice wines.

[29] And then the winery found out.

[30] And the winery is like, we never made that label on that year.

[31] Like, this is all fake.

[32] It's wild, though, dude.

[33] Because it's that thing, it's like people want exclusive shit.

[34] Ah, Cuban cigars.

[35] With sneakers, they find out some people are selling fake sneakers.

[36] That makes sense.

[37] It's like, I don't know.

[38] You can make a sneaker, so.

[39] Yeah, it's leather.

[40] I mean, once you get past the printing of the souls, everything else seems like you could kind of do.

[41] The only way that you can make a shoe exclusive, and this would be just utterly ridiculous, if your shoe was put on the foot of the person that's buying it, like right formed it like Ken Griffith Jr. stepped in your shoe or at least tried to put it on held in his hand and then they sold it to you in Essex school because he he dealt with the shoe like all these Ken Griffiths over here are regular Ken Griffiths but these are handheld Ken Griffith Jr. sneakers and you would have to have like chain of custody where he can do you where it's a photo of him with your video of him touching your shoe putting it in the box and then it's coming to you and maybe like sign in his name on the inside lip right on the tongue just a little bit not I wouldn't I wouldn't even tell him what it was it would be something like they know when your shoe is authentic that you don't even know that it has like but you know this is authentic you got paperwork on it but what makes it authentic I don't know let me see your shoe and then they turn around and they put something like that you don't know light on it and they're like nope nope don't have it like then yes because people I don't know I don't know it's like what is exclusive what is exclusive like if you sitting in first class on the plane are you really getting anything other than getting a bigger seat but you're paying sometimes like way more like what is it a coach seat can be 400 a first class might be 2000 yeah it's and you go in the same place so if the plane went down like do you live like you're more likely to die the people in the back live like do the people say oh joe I thought you was I heard you was the plane accident everybody died you're like yeah I was in first class like why would I be dead like your bags everywhere like you and eight people like the plane had done all type of all and it's on fire but y 'all have no idea y 'all still in the front something's going on out there I think and then you get out of a box a first class box and he's like wow didn't know all that was going on everyone's gone and thank goodness this first class he was available people love exclusivity though they love to be above the herd above the crowd Look at me with my fancy clothes.

[42] I set courtside once and realized that I had to walk up to get out and was pissed.

[43] All these dead.

[44] The further I started going down, I was like, man, shit.

[45] Like, I got to walk back up their way to get out.

[46] God damn it.

[47] Why don't they have a court side exit?

[48] That would be exclusive.

[49] Really exclusive.

[50] You go through the locker room.

[51] Yeah.

[52] Man, it was insane all the steps that I had to take to go do anything.

[53] I was like, damn it.

[54] I haven't gone to see a sporting event live in forever.

[55] And then I went the other night to an Austin FC soccer game.

[56] And it's like 22 ,000 people in the arena.

[57] It was great.

[58] It was a lot of, I never seen soccer live.

[59] It was great.

[60] Like, I appreciate it now.

[61] I watched it on TV.

[62] I'm like, eh, not enough action.

[63] But when you're there live and you see how fast, Those guys run and how much skill involved and tactics and strategy.

[64] But goddamn leaving is a pain in the dick.

[65] And there's 22 ,000 people trying to get out of the same two lanes.

[66] Like, oh, Christ.

[67] And then there's a light up ahead.

[68] You got to wait for the light to turn green?

[69] Oh, fuck.

[70] It's, um, I thought of this.

[71] Because I had this new special that just came out.

[72] I thought as soon as it came out that they was going to invite me to a sporting event, like to shoot the, the, the free throw if I'm on the list throw the first pitch throw the first pitch shoot because in Houston like I see other people I see lesser celebrities shooting the free throw from the line for charity and I'll just be pissed like why have they called me yet to I'm like special number four like what's the hold up like what's the hold up on who is not picking up the phone for me to shoot this damn shot do you have a public system that calls people for that?

[73] No. I think that's what it is.

[74] That's what it is.

[75] The people that get that, chase it.

[76] They chase that shit.

[77] It's like Hollywood Walk of Fame.

[78] Like the star, you could get a star.

[79] You just have to pay for it and have someone set it up.

[80] Like, there's a lot of people that have stars that are just, you've never heard of them before.

[81] They just paid for it.

[82] Like, did you just walk in like, yeah.

[83] Who is Rudy Jackson?

[84] Exactly.

[85] Exactly.

[86] It's not a joke.

[87] Like, what do?

[88] And he, like, right by the way.

[89] the Starbucks.

[90] Walk down Hollywood Boulevard.

[91] And then you find out that the homeless person down the way is Rudy Jackson.

[92] You're like, I used to be great, man. And then back of the day, it was Samuel Jackson stunt double.

[93] Exclusivity is a thing, man. It's like people pay for fake exclusivity.

[94] There was just a bust.

[95] They busted, they said it was $10 million worth fake Rolexes.

[96] And I'm like, well, if they're fake, how they should be worth nothing right like what you are you busting me for trying right I'm the real loser here sir the thing about a fake Rolex is though they can make a fake Rolex exactly like a real Rolex exactly because they use 3D printing so what they do is they'll take a model like a they'll do a computer model of every single part in a Rolex they're take it apart, and then they make a duplicate version of it.

[97] Every part, everything, every screw, every little wheel, every little mechanical piece inside that moves, and then they put it all together.

[98] Yeah, this is it right here.

[99] U .S. Customs Border Protection said it seized 460 counterfeit Rolexes shipped to the U .S. from Hong Kong.

[100] You won't even be able to tell the difference, man. First of all, my eyesight sucks anyway, because I can't like, I have to put reading glasses on.

[101] So it's a Rolex that I'm looking for that they say that people, it's hard to find.

[102] It's the silver one with the green face.

[103] It's a oyster 41.

[104] If anybody in Hong Kong making one of them just, you know, and shit and tie get the one I want, I'm like, you know, I'll be hearing about women getting gifted things that's on their wish list.

[105] Oh, yeah.

[106] I'm like, that shit never If I put a wish list together They were like, you fucking bummed You're a fucking beggar, Ali Like, women can do it It's weird They always complain about It's not always But sometimes they complain about It's just It's a double standard It fucking is Of course it is If I go on the internet And put on a halter top And put a wet t -shirt A wet halter top on and put it right up underneath my chest I get no money I back I get complaints the people hey I need $10 for the shit you put on in people are requesting money from me but you do it let a woman put on a wet hotter top right beneath her breast and just put on there donate I guarantee you could be a millionaire for sure easily there was a woman who was working for a friend of mine She was just in production of his podcast and she would take photos of her feet and put her feet on only fans and she was making $100 ,000 a month showing her feet.

[107] The lady who does my feet has taken videos of my feet and I've seen them on her page of other Korean ladies laughing.

[108] Look at the tour.

[109] Look at that baby tour.

[110] I think it's work.

[111] Did you get your toes done?

[112] You get a pedicure?

[113] Yeah, I go get a pedicure.

[114] Like, yo, I took one of the toughest dudes.

[115] Like, I always take some hood dude to something that they deem as some non -manly shit.

[116] And I'm like, yo, listen, my man. My man, Papa Doc.

[117] He said his feet has been hurting.

[118] I say, yo, listen, you got to get you a pair of hokas.

[119] You know what I'm saying?

[120] So he went and got them.

[121] Yo, I feel like I'm walking on fucking pillows.

[122] I'm like, hoax is the shit.

[123] Hokka, like running shoes?

[124] Yeah.

[125] They're great.

[126] Oh, my goodness, great.

[127] The best shoe ever made.

[128] So, I said, man, he got plaintiffishitis and I say, man, you got to get your feet done.

[129] That's a part of mental health, health care, you know, doing, getting your feet.

[130] He's like, man, I ain't fucking wet.

[131] I'm scared.

[132] I'm not doing it.

[133] I don't know about, and I'm ticklish.

[134] I don't about touching my goddamn feet.

[135] I'm like, I'm going to go with you.

[136] you.

[137] And he's like, I don't give a shit, who go?

[138] I'm not fucking with it.

[139] I'm saying, listen, I got you.

[140] I'm going to go with you.

[141] I'm going to take you to my place.

[142] And he's there, all right.

[143] And I say, listen, before we get in here, we're getting a deluxe.

[144] We're getting the highest package.

[145] The lady going to put all types of shit on your feet.

[146] Manez, cucumbers, all type of buttermilk.

[147] She's going to boil the motherfuckers and acid.

[148] She's going to do everything to your feet.

[149] Trust me. One of the toughest dudes, I'm like, I've had situations I've called him and he showed up with no problem like yo what's up I'm killing everybody but but you would think that I was taking him to the electric chair I'm like yo man are you going to come in the place nothing I ain't fucking away he he's looking at it like it's a setup like it's a mob hit like who are all in there man listen elderly people come here women come in here women feet be fucked up you know what I'm saying listen listen so he sits down takes his shoes off and as soon as he put his feet in the water I'm talking to him the whole time just trying to get his mind off of it and he's like man the fucking water on the water bubbling he's like I see him easing up then she comes out with this tray of all sorts of fruit and oranges put him on his legs he's like man type of fucking fruit salad shit is this right when he's getting the cucumber rub between his toes and all that.

[150] He look over at me as he's drinking, because they bring you drinks.

[151] I'm having a mimosa.

[152] He's having an orange juice because he's talking, I got to stay on my toes.

[153] You can't stay on your toes in here, man. Your toes in the water.

[154] He's on high alert.

[155] This whole experience is nothing.

[156] You're supposed to be relaxing.

[157] The lady come in and she put his massage chair on and he you can see it.

[158] You can see it eased enough on before I know he didn't necessarily the lady doing everything to his feet just got she sawed him she taking the off his toes she doing everything she I'm talking the lady took his feet off and just took him to the back with her she was like yo there's a lot of shit going on he walked out he walking out and he turns to me and said man god damn oh that shit was amazing man got me some new feet that's what you're converted him I like he'll be back without me he'll be back in there without me he'll be back in there without me you know where to go yeah but maybe sometimes it's hard it's like going to the movies by yourself it's a big leap is it some people man I go to the movies by myself in a heart but you're a comic and you go on the road and you go on the road especially if you got an annoying opening act oh you know if you go like if you go on the road and you're going to Cincinnati and never been to Cincinnati before they got a local guy I open him for you and he's annoying, you know, and you wake up and it's 11 a .m. You're like, fuck, what am I going to do today?

[159] I'll go to the gym.

[160] Well, it's playing in the movies.

[161] Fuck it, I'm going to go to the movies by myself.

[162] And I commandeer both seats on the side of me with vittles.

[163] I mean, because if I'm going to the movies, this is not a healthy experience.

[164] I'm all the bullshit.

[165] Yeah.

[166] Sour Patch Kids.

[167] Sour Patch Kids.

[168] I want the Twizzlers.

[169] I want...

[170] This is the only time I eat a box of fucking thin mint, the junior mints.

[171] I eat a box of them shit in the course of the movies with nachos.

[172] I need my nachos with jalapinos.

[173] I need my popcorn.

[174] Halipinos.

[175] I put jalapinos in my popcorn.

[176] Ah, man, I just...

[177] I'm just going to have so much bad shit.

[178] And I needed them both chairs.

[179] And I'm going to sit back and I'm going to watch.

[180] and I'll be on high alert too in the movies sometimes but most of the time I'm just in there relaxing and I already have an exit plan though somebody coming there with some bullshit I got a exit plan this fucking kid shooting yesterday is just that's when you think about exit plan like people always want to think you know what would I do what would I do if something happened like that like this elementary school shooting this elementary school it's the more I'm really about the more fucked it is they saw him go in the cops didn't stop it they didn't go in after him he was in there for 40 minutes for 40 minutes a parents are outside this video the parents screaming at the cops trying to get the cops to go in finally border patrol gets there border patrol goes in and they kill him i talked about it the day of because it it was um I'm on the radio in Houston and it said comes across shooting on Uvaldi is what it said.

[181] So immediately we start trying to correct people because in Houston we have a street, Uvaldi, and that's what people heard.

[182] So we went in correcting it and it's in Uvaldi, Texas.

[183] and I'm the first thing I'm like this who went to the school like and why and why are we still in this same position over and over again we the level of concern that we have for children is really lackluster in this country because why does this continue to happen why is it no security why is it why was he able to even even get in the school if you're looking at him and you know he doesn't go if you don't want to stop him to even ask a question I I'm confused of why people with these issues go to the most like what it's like why this place why it's horrific I they do it because it's the worst thing you can do.

[184] They're shooting little kids.

[185] They're going to an elementary school kid.

[186] You're getting like eight -year -olds, ten -year -olds.

[187] It's the most horrific thing, the most innocent.

[188] And we know that this is a possibility, right?

[189] And we know that this has happened.

[190] So why don't lawmakers make the law a law to be, if you commit this horrific crime?

[191] If you go anywhere, the consequence is so dire that we that this is time this is a like you get beheaded this is once again this back off to like yeah but these guys want to die like it's a death sentence they know like if that guy's in there for 40 minutes he's not trying to live he's waiting for someone to come in and kill him that's a lot of these guys it's a suicide run I think someone I think someone feel like they're going to live and somebody going to make a movie about them I think that that you you you you because if I would kill you before you even got You walking up It's going to be a problem Because as soon as you walking up to the school It's going to be It's going to be some resistance Because they know that you're not There's no resistance to these places Yeah So you We have to put up some walls of safety When we know that these things happen In this country and people's mental health And people, I'm not even blaming on mental health A lot of these things It's this desire of sensationalism that a lot of these people have.

[192] And you should combat it at all angles of it prior to have.

[193] Protection is preventive.

[194] Yeah.

[195] Well, somebody pointed out, and it's a good point.

[196] How do we have $40 billion to send to Ukraine?

[197] And we don't have $40 billion to protect the schools.

[198] Exactly.

[199] Where is the money getting out?

[200] I said this about every single problem they have in this country.

[201] Every time there's, like, a report on the shootings in Chicago.

[202] Like, how do we have money to send to other countries when we don't have enough money to fix whatever's going on the south side of Chicago or Baltimore or parts of Detroit?

[203] If we have this money, how is it poverty?

[204] Right.

[205] In this.

[206] Right.

[207] Okay.

[208] So you find money for other things, but you don't find money to correct the problems here?

[209] Exactly.

[210] exactly it's almost like well it has to be it's almost like it has to be profitable like you remember when we invaded iraq and haliburton got these no -bid contracts that fix all the shit we blew up give them a no -bid contract to fix Chicago go in there fix it go in there set up set up community centers set up whatever you can do to protect people set up whatever you can do to educate people set up whatever you can do to provide people with better housing make give them hope Do the country.

[211] The whole country.

[212] Do the whole country.

[213] It can be, like, if you've got that much money to go into these other countries and fix things.

[214] And this whole idea of us being the police of the world, how the fuck can we be the police of the world?

[215] We can't even police our own backyard.

[216] How do I have a plan to eradicate homelessness, but the smartest people in this world don't have a plan.

[217] What's your plan?

[218] Simple.

[219] So, in most cities, you have these abandoned buildings.

[220] You have a lot of abandoned buildings.

[221] You go in, you refurbish this building, and you start people right at the top.

[222] And it's a tear system that as you tear out the door.

[223] So whatever your situation is, whether it's mental health, you get that fixed there.

[224] Whether it's financial literacy, you get that fixed there.

[225] Whatever your situation is, you get fixed in this building, that this is what this recovery center is for.

[226] Then you put them in jobs within the building because it's ran by, grants within the building to heighten the skills that they already have and you ask you what are their interests what do they want to be what were you before this happened to you how does this happen you get all that back information and as as as they are tearing out the money that's allocated for each particular client through this grant half of that money is being put to the side for when they get ready to come out that they're you're not let you're not letting them out this program just naked with just the skills that they acquired in this program, you're giving them a lease on a new lease on life.

[227] This is the money that you acquired by being through this program.

[228] Let's help you start your life from this point.

[229] And you invest in the businesses that they're starting.

[230] You invest in their life, whether it's a trade center, you invest in these people.

[231] And with the, with the notion of they're going to reinvest a percentage back into the building to help more people.

[232] And you keep recycling people back into the world.

[233] in that manner so when you see somebody homeless they're like i'm homeless i can't help myself they're like bullshit it's a building right there that helps every single person that even falls on hard time and then you give people free health care i bet if you did that for several generations you could put a massive debt in it i don't think you'd ever totally fix it because you're never going to fix abusive parents sexual abuse drug abuse when you're young you get people you get people out of them you get people out that situation because i was in a i had an abuse of stepfather.

[234] The only way to remedy is is to get out of this because you can't fix him.

[235] You got to focus on me. Yeah.

[236] And get me to safety.

[237] But if you cripple somebody thinking to somebody you put a person in a position where they feel like they need that person.

[238] And so you make excuses for their behavior.

[239] When I see this all the time and people like, why did this person stay?

[240] Why did this person do this?

[241] Because if they were handicapped, They have.

[242] They was crippled.

[243] And when you feel like you have no other place to go, you stay in positions that's abusing you.

[244] That's what people do.

[245] That's definitely true.

[246] But the amount of resources you would have to have to take care of every family where every person is being abused.

[247] We have it because we can give it.

[248] We can give it.

[249] We throw away more food in this country than most countries produced in a year.

[250] Our waste ratio, if our waste ratio change, then our can.

[251] condition change.

[252] Because if you allocate funds to the right thing instead of wasting funds, like even with, even with this, people say it's a misinformation in certain things.

[253] Yes, it is when the federal government doesn't allocate funds to certain people to eradicate the misinformation.

[254] In media.

[255] In media, it's federal funds that go out to media companies.

[256] Why you don't get that to some to some of the black media outlets that you say that don't know what's going on because you're not helping you're not helping the situation either you hurt in the situation.

[257] You're saying that people's number, if you know that the number one thing that cripples people in this country is health and then you don't make it where they can have quality free health care in this country then you don't feel like the consumer that you're the human being is the most important commodity on this planet if you invest in the human being and the human being does the good works that he's supposed to do with that investment and they invest in more human beings you create this utopia of helping and learning and not being and not having a phobia of hey Joe I need your help That doesn't make me less than a man because I need your help with something.

[258] You're supposed to give your fellow man a leg up.

[259] That's what you're supposed to do.

[260] Yes.

[261] But we live in the what I'm not supposed to do.

[262] Yeah, and helping people feels good.

[263] It's good for you too.

[264] That's one thing we have to get into people's heads.

[265] Helping people feels good.

[266] It's good for you too.

[267] It's like people are selfish.

[268] They don't want to help themselves.

[269] They feel like if I'm helping someone else, it's taken away from me. but that's not the case what does that mindset come from they just they just need a better well it's a it's a famine mindset the famine mindset is there's not enough to go around but there's enough to go around there's enough for everybody you know this is one thing that I always try to instill in comedians because comedians are like notoriously selfish they think about themselves want to get ahead narcissists I want to get ahead I want to get ahead why is he doing that and why I'm not not doing that I want to get it I want to get it if you can help the people around you develop a community when you develop a community everybody wants everybody to do good in our community if one of us is killing it everybody's happy one of us has a special and that special's killing it like you're a special which is out on you two right now when that happens people get excited like god damn look at him look at this guy look at her everybody's killing it that's good for everybody and it gives the people coming up hope like i'm entering into a community if i work hard and if i continue to like honor the craft of stand -up comedy I'm a part of this very small and tight -knit community of people there's not that many of us and if we do that we help each other it's good for everybody that's the I think that's why Rodney Dangerfield was one of the ones for me like yes when people say who your influences I'm influenced by more than just what you did on stage you know it's how you your character, how you were as a person.

[270] Yes.

[271] And when he was not selfish, like, hey, man, I got a platform.

[272] Everybody is welcome to this platform.

[273] If you're funny, let's do it.

[274] Think about the people that he blew up.

[275] Sam Kinnison, Dice Clay, Bill Hicks, Dom Herrera, Lenny Clark, Roseanne Barr, down the line.

[276] Seinfeld.

[277] Oh, science, man. Dude.

[278] So many people.

[279] It's, and why not, why not want to be that in comedy or why leave that to another entity?

[280] Oh, look, I'm on, I'm on the all -stars of this.

[281] I'm on the, I'm on the actors of that.

[282] Like, why leave it to other people and other crafts to heighten your craft?

[283] Why leave it to other people from other cities to say, my, my biggest thing is to get the recognition from my peers.

[284] like when a comic calls me and says man your special classic like I'm putting it in this space yeah this is because they know the craft there's not a you're not a you're not a spectator because to the spectators everybody looks good to spectators but when the people who know the craft are looking like nah you don't know what you're looking at like you don't know how special this is yeah because the special is supposed to be especially supposed to be a piece of the person like and with the the people that call and say hey man this is timeless it's like yo you really put a piece of like man you did it it's it's insane and that's what we work towards you think about that when you're putting your bits together you're editing them when you're going over i'm going maybe that's a little too long or maybe i need a little bit little something there maybe I need to trim that up or maybe I need to explain that a little bit better you want that thing to when it gets released you get those phone calls like dude that thing was awesome that thing was awesome and then and then you get thank you thank you man appreciate it appreciate it and then you want to do that to other people too you want to be able to call them up and go do your special it was amazing it was that and and that's I remember watching I remember watching Dan Sober's son of Gary and I'm sitting there in fucking amazement I'm like this shit is good yeah I'm like yo this shit is fucking good like I'm gonna call him yeah feels good like I'm sitting there like this shit is good man it feels good to call somebody and tell them that too and I'm like god damn soa you are fucking amazing and that's the thing you know um i watch i watch earthquakes and i felt good for quake yes and that's the thing that you want to do in this business i remember writing with bill bellamy on this special and when he's getting ready to go out and we're talking And I'm like, my last words was like, yo, man, just go and just do what you do.

[285] And when it came together, I called him like, yo, I watched it live.

[286] I was there through the whole process.

[287] And this shit is still good.

[288] Diel was clear.

[289] I was like, and I think that comics don't understand.

[290] I'm not chasing other comics in an aspect of the new guys.

[291] chasing the class like I'm chasing calling and Cosby and Prior and Eddie I'm I'm chasing them so what you're doing doesn't affect me or change how I'm doing it because man Sinbad like the memorable things that I'm like I want my I want my special to be in that when people say hey man live from Sunset Strip elephant in the room Domino effect Ali Steak I want to be mentioned amongst that and I tell people I'm not playing the game for riches and all that I'm playing for that yellow jacket you know a lot of people they satisfaction and you play football and you play through high school you win a high school championship great then some people want to go to college win a college championship great some people want to go to the NFL and get to the NFL they want to go to the All -Star games and that's fine some people want to win a Super Bowl but some guys are playing the game to at the end of that receive a yellow jacket they're not cool with just being there they want the jacket they want greatness yeah yeah aspire always to greatness because even if you don't get there you get pretty fucking excellent because if you're trying to get pretty good you'll get pretty good but if you're trying to achieve excellence like real true excellence where you can be proud or something you know even if you get don't get to where you wanted to go you get a lot further than where you would go if you have low expectations this is the first piece of work that actually changed my mind doing something how so people ask me hey man when it comes to storytelling who is your top people who the best storytellers and comedy to you i used to say just like this i say it would be cosby carlin joy ds eddie murphy me and i say me joy joy and eddie all threes we and we third and then other people I looked when I put the special together and I looked at it and I looked at the craft of the ability to bring people into the story this is the first time somebody asked me after that and I said me Cosby then everybody else after that can sort that shit out but I can't deny myself no more and put myself behind somebody when it comes to a story to like bringing you into a story it's a different kind of art yeah it's a different art and i've gotten pretty goddamn good that's a thing where ari when he put together that storyteller's show that was his idea he was like these stories are too hard to develop when you're doing a 15 minute set on like a stacked comedy store lineup you know you got 10 fucking killers you want to kill to and if you're trying to develop a story and it's a story about going to the park with your dad it's a long -ass story like people are like where are you going with this but if you could do it on a show that's just people telling stories then you could develop it and tighten it and then get to the point it might be your closing bit man we didn't be already talked yesterday about this is not happening yeah and he was like out of all them stories all the shows I've done Mexican got on Boots is still my favorite goddamn story.

[292] He said, I didn't know you.

[293] We was going to put you on the digital side of it.

[294] And we was looking at the story.

[295] He was like, God damn it.

[296] It's like, and he was like, I didn't even know what you were talking about.

[297] And I was hanging on every goddamn word.

[298] And then it was like, oh shit, this shit's crazy.

[299] Like, I'm like, no, I appreciate it.

[300] Then he said the next one was even more, like Mitchell, it's like, then I start, like, he, his goddamn ability to tell his story, he's seeing it through a different, like, whatever lens he's seeing it through, he's making me see it through that same lens.

[301] And I have no goddamn idea what he's even talking about.

[302] That's the beautiful thing about someone when they're really locked in on stage.

[303] I've always said this.

[304] I feel like I'm thinking through their mind.

[305] Like I'm allowing them to take over my mind.

[306] Take me on a journey.

[307] that's why when someone's shitty or hacky or it's like ah why are you using my mind why are you bothering my mind you know like I gotta get the fuck out of here I can't watch this I'm super sensitive to bad comedy I what like I can't watch it like I'm not it it's like it's like it's like if I see you and I and I never I never thought this before until somebody said hey man I just dude did a bad set and then he tried to shake my hand.

[308] I didn't, I didn't want him to touch me. Like, I didn't, I didn't want the shit on me. Like, don't put that shit on me. It's contagious.

[309] And I was like, oh, that's rude as shit.

[310] And then somebody did a bad set and he, and he, it ain't walked into me. I was like, and I start walking the other way.

[311] Like, ah, don't touch me. Don't do that shit.

[312] You go, you're going to give me COVID.

[313] I don't want to.

[314] Wednesday night, Ron White had his friend.

[315] He claims, he claims she's funny.

[316] I'm sure she's a nice lady.

[317] And anyway, she just didn't belong.

[318] You can't follow Ron White when you're an amateur.

[319] You just can't.

[320] You can't.

[321] You've got to be a fucking touring, rock solid, like set up punchline.

[322] Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, good premises.

[323] You've got to be good to follow Ron fucking White.

[324] She was not.

[325] And she, not only did she eat dick, but then she came and hung out with us in the green room.

[326] I'm like, fuck, I got to go up next.

[327] So Tony's on stage killing, and the first five minutes, he's just roasting her.

[328] And I'm back there, and she's, like, making excuses and talking.

[329] I'm like, oh, my God, I've got to get out of this room.

[330] He dragged her into the green room.

[331] Now she's back there.

[332] Just coughing bad comedy at us.

[333] Like, oh, no. I'm like, oh, no. So I start playing music loud, and I'm moving around.

[334] I'm dumbed shadow boxing.

[335] I wanted to leave.

[336] You wanted to leave, too, right?

[337] Desrey Javy was there.

[338] I'm not exaggerating, right?

[339] No, no. And everybody felt it.

[340] Even Ron felt.

[341] He's, well, you know, it wasn't the best set.

[342] Man, it's weird because, me listening, first, big up to Ron White, a classy, very classy man. He's the man. Ron, I just imagine getting his phone call.

[343] I'm getting ready to do Orlando Improv.

[344] My agent Joe Escherbun, who I love dearly.

[345] Joe calls me and said Hey, just want to run this by you Someone wants to Want to feature for you I'm like No, I'm cool I got my feature Marcus Wilder I'm cool He's like Just hear me out He's working on some new stuff He's coming back He just wants to be around A comic who Is a good comic I'm like Joe Who is this You're taking too long he's like Ron White I was like I'm not fucking with some guy that has stole Ron's white name like Ron White from Orlando get the fuck out of here he's like no Ron White White White right and I was like and I doubled down and I'm like Ron White White like like like the fucking man Ron White like he's like yes I'm like I can't even get my yes to get my yes like yeah yeah I get the fucking work with Ron Mike hell yeah I say he wants to he wants to metal he's like yeah he's got like 20 25 minutes I said do he want a headline like I let him headline just the fucking like relinquish my weekie to Ron Mike just come feature or do some whole shit or whatever he's like no he says you just want to so I I get there and I'm I'm already anticipating he's a legend he's going to be in the green room doing the shit and everybody knows like I like being my green room first and invite you in but I'm relinquishing all that shit because it's Ron White I get there Ron White is the fucking constant professional not in the green room he comes to the green room he knocks on the door and hey what's wrong and I'm like and I'm sitting at all like I'm fucking wrong white white like but I'm He got his bus outside.

[346] He's hanging in his bus, then he came up and saw hanging the green one with us.

[347] And he was like, look, I'm going to go out here and do the raggedest 20 minutes that I just put together and trying to get this shit together.

[348] Now, I'm going out, and I'm going to watch, because this is fucking wrong way.

[349] Stellar 20 minutes.

[350] It's fucking killing.

[351] I'm so caught up in what he, and they're about to introduce me. I'm in the back to him.

[352] Look, shit was amazing.

[353] And we talking.

[354] And he's like, I'll leave you.

[355] You gotta go up.

[356] I'm like, oh shit.

[357] So I go up, do my, and he comes in the showroom, and he's watching from the beginning.

[358] And I'm doing my thing after the show he comes in.

[359] He's like, look at it.

[360] You are fucking incredible.

[361] Like, I tried to give it to you.

[362] I tried to rattle you because his shit was so crisp.

[363] Like, it was still a class.

[364] like he's like man so the rest of the weekend we just chatting it up and just I'm like I'm fucking kicking it with Ron White and then my mom like man these places and every night he just giving me a little more something about you know you can go a little deeper in that story you know because you had me you had me gave everything and he noticed that I would start a story and stop and start doing another story and he's said you keep leaving me kid like I'm still trying to figure out what happened with your uncle like I didn't go back you're like no you fucking didn't go back and I'm like oh shit I can start going back and I'm like like if she knows him like why are you not picking up the jewels from him like she can't you got to watch if you saw you can't when did you come Wednesday night what time did you get to right when I Right when I walked in.

[365] Okay.

[366] You missed the chaos.

[367] It's impossible.

[368] You can't fix it.

[369] It's like me breathing underwater.

[370] It's not going to happen.

[371] It's not going to happen.

[372] There's nothing to do.

[373] You can't fix it.

[374] I mean, maybe on another time and another state of mind with different material, maybe she could do well.

[375] But in that moment, there was no fixing it.

[376] There's no advice to be given.

[377] She came up with a notebook.

[378] Oh.

[379] Yeah.

[380] You came up with notes and panicked.

[381] Didn't have the mic close to her mouth.

[382] Everything was wrong.

[383] And I don't think she knew she was going to go up until, like, right before Ron went up, Ron told her that he's going to bring you up, I'm going to bring you up, I'm going to bring you up.

[384] Because he came in the background, this was the first problem.

[385] He goes, she's a really good rider.

[386] Oh, don't say that.

[387] This is what I want to hear.

[388] She's fucking hilarious.

[389] She's fucking hilarious.

[390] Can she do a guess that?

[391] Okay.

[392] A friend of mine is a really good rider.

[393] I'm like, ooh.

[394] Okay.

[395] What else?

[396] How is she at delivering this writing?

[397] Yeah, I don't think any of my friends I've ever said that they, Bryson Brown is from Austin.

[398] He's fucking hysterical.

[399] Like, that's how I introduced him.

[400] Like, yo, this is Bryson Brown.

[401] He's fucking hysterical.

[402] Yeah, you want to grab a guess of.

[403] Overall assessment of their ability on stage, not like a little tiny area that they're good at.

[404] It's an important area, being a good writer, very important.

[405] But without delivery and timing and presence and everything, it's, are you good?

[406] Hey, um, she's a good set up.

[407] She's a good set up.

[408] She set up, Tony.

[409] Tony destroyed that lady.

[410] That ruthless little motherfucker, there is no one alive that you want to bomb in front of when you're going to bring up like Tony.

[411] Because he will, he roasted her.

[412] I mean, he had seven or eight solid minutes just killing her when he went on stage.

[413] Yeah.

[414] It was amazing That's what you do You have to You have to acknowledge The elephant in the room And I hate I used to hate doing it I used to hate doing it Especially I used to hate doing it Period But Bill Bellamy He's a nice guy But he has a mean streak In him That is Outstanding On the tour with him I used to host this tour And somebody would ask for a guest spot And he would come in And he would come in and be like I'll eat triple seven Like oh shit who just asked for a goddamn guest spot so now people don't know what we're about to do to you like I'm gonna come out and usually I would do 15 I just skate into it but I'm coming out with seven minutes of straight fucking home runs baw bough bow bow bow bow bow bow bow bow I'm like I'm I'm not I'm stacking this shit on these people so like you still laughing at the first joke I'm on joke number five I'm fucking stacking it on And when I leave them I'm bringing people gonna be still laughing When I bring you up They're not even fucking gonna think about shit you're saying Because they're still laughing from joke number three And I'm gonna bring you up And I'm gonna lead I'm gonna sit you right in that fucking pressure cooker And you're gonna I don't give a damn You're gonna die If you can't fucking surf Because I put a hundred foot wave on your ass and then you die and then I go up and I put another seven minutes of your dying on top of it and Bill's like I hate when people ask us for guest spots I'm like ah you fucking evil man you said the fucking junkyard dog to destroy somebody I'm like but for that person that did that set and bombed if they can figure out how to follow you when you're crushing if they can figure out how to ride that wave that is so important for that lady Missy Shore that's what she did every fucking time if you were a good comic that she thought you had some potential and you were young she would throw you on after a killer who's on who's on the lineup for me was Martin Lawrence in the 90s dude you never saw anybody eat it like seeing me going on after Martin Lawrence when he was in the leather jumpsuit days people don't remember they don't remember 95 Martin Lawrence 1995 my God My God His timing His facial expressions The power Chris Rock to this day Talks about a time Where he bombed going out After Martin Lawrence And it changed his career Because he had been doing Too many easy shows He'd been doing too many Of those New York City Like seller spots Like everybody's so happy to see you You can kind of be casual And he's headlining And Martin Lawrence Is throwing lightning bolts just the whole room just he was so good he was so dynamic he would pace the stage he had so much energy when he would hit his punchlines and hold his facial expressions he would be like god I can't even watch this I'm going to go I'm going to my death I'm going to my death I went to my death I followed Martin Lawrence dozens of times dozens you know what I let me tell you what I what I love about an honest comic.

[415] You know how many comics wouldn't say that they went behind somebody that was just fucking a absolute monster?

[416] Like, yo man, this shit is a problem.

[417] Like, how am I going to match this shit?

[418] Like, I can imagine going up after Martin.

[419] Martin's still hungry.

[420] He's out there fucking getting it.

[421] Who's in his 30s?

[422] Martin Lawrence in his 30s with a leather jumpsuit on.

[423] You're fucked.

[424] You're fucked.

[425] People don't remember, man. If you go back to you so crazy, God damn, he was good.

[426] In my mind, he's like, you know, when you talk about the greats.

[427] Because, you know, he went and did the TV show and he didn't tour as much and didn't put out as much comedy material.

[428] So a lot of people that weren't around in the 90s forget how good he was.

[429] Dude, I eat dick on after that guy.

[430] But it taught me. It taught me how to ride the wave.

[431] It taught me how to start strong.

[432] It taught me how to cut all the bullshit out.

[433] And to look at your act, like, scrutinize it.

[434] Look at it with a microscope.

[435] Get rid of some of that shit that's not that good.

[436] Fix the setup.

[437] You better do it right.

[438] You better sound like a fucking professional.

[439] You're going on after one of the best comedians walking the face of the planet.

[440] And back then, he might have been number one.

[441] He might have been number one in 95.

[442] He might have been number one.

[443] He was murdering.

[444] I mean, I would be in the back room terrified, just hearing the roars.

[445] I remember times being places and you're going up behind people that are fucking assassins.

[446] Tony Roberts, I don't know if you know Tony Roberts, but he is so quick.

[447] It's just rapid fire shit.

[448] And people used to be like, man, you can't kid anybody follow Tony.

[449] There's nobody in playing for a Tony.

[450] and I remember being at a spot and then people was like yo Tony's up right now you're going up next I'm like cool I'd already been able to ride the wave of like I'm not going up to compete with Tony I'm going up to do my shit and I remember being offended during this show that a person thought that I couldn't follow Tony and they switched up the lineup and I was fucking pissed I said okay and I went out and I got a stand ovation and Tony Roberts was the person that said he was he said he was right there when the production person said so the first comment got a stand ovation what the fuck do do we do now it was like because you thought that I was like they they had played me like I was some fucking throw on on the show right and they was like yo I'll just got a stand ovation and opened the door of his green room and said, what did y 'all think he was going to do?

[451] You fucking disrespected him.

[452] Because he's like, yo, he don't, it doesn't matter where I go because I know what I'm going to do when I get there and I learned very early on because I was going up behind people that Benji Brown at the Coconut Grove Improv.

[453] He had my fuck laughing so hard at a dude.

[454] came in the green room and sat down and it was laughing he was on his way from the bathroom he just busting the green room and he said man this motherfucker killing me because it was on the way and you could hear it you could hear it because the green room was like right behind the stage and you could hear it like Benji Brown is fucking destroying this room and he's doing this character Kiki and he's like yo and it's loud pitch ghetto girl and he's fucking destroying this room and then he stops and says let me bring up the next comic you like god damn it's people it's people dead in here like it's like you gotta go out the coconut grove improv is where I saw Joey Diaz put people in their grave because Joey Diaz would go up there and do half his punchlines in Spanish and you would have like a 40 % Cuban audience and Joey Diaz would have la bingo and he would hit some fucking Spanish punchlines and people would just throw their chairs up in the air they were falling down to the ground knocking over tables it was chaos and then Joey was middling so Joey this was back in the day where Joey was coming up and they would have like some road act who's you know did HBO in 1984 and you know kind of still has the same material and they would have to go on after Joey I saw people quit yes quit that shit that shit That shit is fantastic when you're like, yo man, this shit is David Wayne.

[455] David Wayne, I'm middle for David Wayne.

[456] Because whatever his middle of the act was fucking up, and he said it was too dark.

[457] So they called me, and at the end of the weekend, David, I never went into Green Room.

[458] He called me in the Green Room on Sunday.

[459] Come in, I'll sit down.

[460] I say, hey, how are you doing this way?

[461] he said how does it feel to be a fucking assassin I said what he said I used to do this I used to do this to people I used to fucking go on stage and destroy people you're a fucking assassin are you moving to LA I'm like no I'm right he's like fucking assassin that's a nice feeling Bobby Lee Bobby Lee I'm hosting the show Bobby Lee had a lady that was his middle of that And after the first show Bobby, we had the Houston Improv Bobby called me in the room in the room and said Hey, I'm not going to fire you I'm not going to fire you Just want you to be honest with me Are you a host?

[462] I'm like, I'm the host Are you?

[463] You know what the fuck I'm saying Are you a host?

[464] I'm like No, I'm Coley's like, I fucking knew it.

[465] Improv's always doing this shit to me giving me the strongest motherfucker in the city because he's doing 30 minutes.

[466] And I'm like, I'm feeling the rest of the time.

[467] He's like, I fucking knew it.

[468] And Bobby was going out doing his clothes or first.

[469] He was like, he's so fucking insane.

[470] Wow.

[471] He's like, he comes to stage, Bobby League, next thing Bobby League pants are off.

[472] Dicks out.

[473] Dicks out.

[474] I'm starting.

[475] with this like not fucking fin to bury me behind the fucking host i'm not doing it like sometimes you have to do that you have to go out with your your strongest shit first you can't dilly dally yeah when someone murders you you better take them up to the same r pms and the thing is don't i won't i want the young comments out there that's listening probably don't think that you murdering a headliner with the local shit like if it's local that's like that's man you're not I'm on Martin Luther King And get the fuck out of here Everybody got my own If you murder You got to murder With your shit Real shit Real shit It can't be the The fluff You know I lived in Boston And there was some of the best Comics alive back then But they all had local shit And when they would go on the road Like local shit in Boston would kill At 100 % You go on the road It was 30 % It was like the same bits Nobody knew what the fuck you were talking about Nobody cared about that accent Nobody cared about those references to like the red socks nobody gave a fuck yeah and all those bits were useless and those guys just stayed some of the best comics i've ever seen in my life they lived in boston they stayed in boston and they got trapped they got trapped by local shit there were local celebrities and they got trapped doing local shit they never did the road if i and i'm just saying if you want to know how not to be locked into local shit even if you in a place where you started look at my special I shot my special in Houston you can't tell it's Houston I'm talking about things in Houston but from a wide eye lens but it's not about Houston it's about life it's about life it's good it's very good and it's very intimate which is I like I like a special in a comedy club I really do I think there's something better about a if I'm watching it at home I'm in my living room I want to watch it in an intimate environment.

[476] I want to be in an intimate environment in the audience.

[477] If I'm watching someone on stage and they're in a fuck, like Kevin Hart did his shit in like 50 ,000 people.

[478] It's like, Jesus Christ, how do I even pretend I'm there?

[479] Yeah.

[480] But when I'm watching you and I'm watching you on stage at a comedy club, there's a normal size stage, intimate with the audience, you're seeing the people in the front row, you're smiling, you're having fun.

[481] I'm there.

[482] I'm there.

[483] You locked in the moment.

[484] Where'd you do it?

[485] Houston Improv.

[486] Ah.

[487] You can't tell because of the curtain in the background.

[488] Yeah, we pipe.

[489] That's a great fucking room.

[490] Yeah, it is.

[491] That's a great fucking room.

[492] 400 people in me. That's nice.

[493] And we just went on a, and the crazy thing is when people know that they come in to see you do the journey.

[494] Yeah.

[495] And it's weird because the people who can't, because I did it during the weekend that I was there.

[496] So the people who saw me saw the show on Thursday and Friday is like, that shit didn't happen.

[497] So the people who saw it on Saturday Got the whole Hollywood Because, you know, Eric Abrams, the same person who shot my stuff for Comedy Central And this is not happening with Ari I got them I wanted that look and Eric is a fucking great director Like It's really not about him It's about what you want and he just suggests shit like what do you what do you think about what do you think about this?

[498] Like I wasn't thinking about it but now that I am you know so he just suggests like do you really need that?

[499] Do you like I don't and it comes together him and him and Jordan did the lights and it looks like that was one of the things and especially when somebody notices it when my guy called me and say man let me tell you the most amazing shit it looks like a class it looks like 1985 i'm like pull it up jamie let me see let me see the video because there's something about get a get a look at it like look it man that's classic classic comedy club it's perfect perfect size stage perfect intimacy with the crowd i was thinking that Man, because I just did stand -up live with Tony.

[500] I did a guest at it.

[501] I was not even supposed to be there.

[502] In Phoenix?

[503] I fucking love that club.

[504] I fucking love that club.

[505] And I was there, and I was thinking, God damn, maybe I should film my fucking special here.

[506] Yo.

[507] So good.

[508] It's some comedy clubs that I think that I've set up so perfect.

[509] Mm -hmm.

[510] Man, stand -up live in Phoenix.

[511] Zanies in Nashville Oh Yes Zanies in Nashville's For all of us Oh my God That's a great club God Damn it's good Levity Live In West Niagara Yep Yep That's a great one You This is what we ought to do I always put myself in shit Like I just told Art That we had to do A festival A festival We travel To festivals Around the world He's Jewish or Muslim Like the Muslim Jew Festival Festival review With me and Art It's going to weird -ass festivals We ought to see Between me and you Take a month To go to all these clubs And see how many Specials we can shoot In these clubs In a month You mean just shoot all the Film all the shows 30 minutes We go to these clubs and shoot a new 30 minutes in each one these clubs.

[512] So you do 30, he does 30?

[513] No, me and you.

[514] This is me and you.

[515] Me and you do 30, I do 30 in each one of these great film clubs and put it out as the series of going to clubs the best comedy clubs to shoot especially.

[516] Comedy Works in Denver is another one.

[517] I've never played it.

[518] What?

[519] I've never played it.

[520] It's like I'm boxed into some weird shit that's behind the scenes that I don't know what's going on I've never mean you tried to get in I'm waiting to get in I'll get you in today I want because I've heard I'll call Wendy today I would love to yeah I didn't yeah let's do that I'll fix that yeah you need to be there that's one of the great clubs of the world man it's a what's another great club that like these are club that people don't talk about like I hear about the seller and I'm not knocking the seller but But those, like, you know, another club that they remodeled, he remodeled it, and I think I was the first person in there when he remodeled it.

[521] It's weird looking, but it's so fucking intimate.

[522] The comedy zone in Charlotte.

[523] Never done it.

[524] Oh.

[525] It's fucking, it's so intimate, and they're around you.

[526] Like, improv is a fucking great club.

[527] Oh, another club, D .C. Improv.

[528] Oh, it's an amazing club.

[529] Amazing club.

[530] DC Improv's flawless.

[531] Flawless.

[532] It's no, it's a, man, it's fucking, it's, it's, it's, it's flawless.

[533] It's perfect, perfect comedy club.

[534] Yeah.

[535] There's a few of those.

[536] Perfect height ceiling, perfect size stage, connected to the crowd.

[537] Rick Bronsonson's don't look bad to shoot them in.

[538] It's a Rick Bronsons.

[539] They don't look at, that fucking, that stand -up live is fucking.

[540] Stand -up Live in Phoenix is one of the great clubs.

[541] And it's big.

[542] 600 seats.

[543] It's big.

[544] But the roar.

[545] The roar when you're killing?

[546] Ooh.

[547] My, not, okay, they moved the Hollywood improv to, I think it's Dana Beach.

[548] It's another, it's an improv in Florida.

[549] So they moved it out of the hard rock?

[550] They moved it out of the hot rock.

[551] It's Dana Beach now.

[552] That's a nice -ass club.

[553] I haven't been in a year.

[554] Oh.

[555] What do you think about, what you think about, Cobb City?

[556] Which one?

[557] Cobbs comedy club the old cobs was amazing I used to take a pay cut to do the old Cobbs because I used to do I used to do the punchline which was great the punchline still great but Cobbs the old Cobbs was so intimate it was maybe a hundred and forty hundred and fifty people just stuffed into a room and it was just perfect it was so intimate and then the new Cobbs it's like this big high ceiling and then there's a balcony but it's way in the back and the balcony is way in the back and it's like elevated it's weird it's not bad it's a great place but it's not perfect funny with some of these clubs I don't even think maybe it's me because I guess I don't have a permanent audience just yet but some of these clubs when you go in it's not even the club the club is fucking fantastic but the audience that's come there.

[558] You're like, hmm.

[559] I don't, hey, look, do I need to read all the shit that I read first and tell y 'all about it so I can come so you can be familiar with some of the shit that's going on in the fucking world.

[560] Like, where?

[561] Like what?

[562] Oh, man. Right off the back, Toledo, Toledo, Ohio.

[563] It's like fucking pulling teeth.

[564] it sounds like a place where you'd be pulling tea Toledo fuck man it's a I'm gonna say sometimes Syracuse is fucking weird Upstate New York's weird period Syracuse Albany You're like god damn it man Anything anything outside of Chicago Any of the clubs around outside of Chicago You're like god damn y 'all don't reach But that Levitown, is that what it is?

[565] Levity Live.

[566] No, no, the improv.

[567] No, Shamsberg.

[568] That's what it is.

[569] Seanberg.

[570] Yeah.

[571] That's kind of Chicago.

[572] It's uppity as shit.

[573] It's like, suburbs.

[574] It's like, I don't know what the fuck you're saying.

[575] Like, you don't, you fucking know.

[576] Like, God damn it.

[577] Chicago, though.

[578] Chicago's a great comedy city.

[579] Fuck, that's a great city.

[580] I miss jokes and notes.

[581] That was a place that I, and I played the Zanis there once.

[582] It was a great, it was a great experience.

[583] I like some of the old nostalgia clubs, too.

[584] When I go there, you know that it's been here for a long as time.

[585] And, or a weird, like a weird spot that I go to the punchline in Atlanta, where it's inside the landmark, the landmark diner.

[586] I hate the green room, but I like the fact that I walk through some crowded, chaired room, and it feels like they still smoking.

[587] in the room, like.

[588] Yeah.

[589] The old punchline was great.

[590] Oh, man, it was beautiful.

[591] It was amazing.

[592] That was amazing.

[593] That was an amazing room.

[594] And they got rid of it.

[595] I'm like, fuck.

[596] Well, I think they lost the lease or something like that.

[597] It's just like being a comic and being a professional comic, being able to work these places and touring the road.

[598] When I was a kid, man, that seemed to me to be like an impossibility.

[599] To be a headliner and touring the road and being able to be.

[600] work these fucking amazing clubs like the punchline like Zanies it's like that was always the dream one of the things I love about those old places too like Zanies is you get to like look in the wall and you'll see like old headshots head shots from the early 80s faded I think they this is a room that I like that I'm very very comfortable in what is it it is in it's in North Carolina as well Charlie Goodnight Yes, that's a great room.

[601] I think they move in the building as well.

[602] I think they did something different there.

[603] I haven't been to the new place.

[604] Man, I like, because I would go down and look at the old pictures and then go play, because it's a nostalgia to some of these rooms, man, and I like going there.

[605] But when you think about shooting, the room feels warm and you feel like, I can do some other things.

[606] things to the room to make it a little warmer and just go in and fucking crush it yeah they got good audiences in certain places well they have a long history of having like charlie goodnight's been around a long time so everybody's come through there so all the people that live in that area know that you go to charlie good nights on any Friday and Saturday night you're going to get great comedy they only get great comedians there it's like it's you're going to work there it's a classic club yeah there's also a next door honky -talk bar and that was my first experience with country western music like live like not even live but just like in a place where people listen to it we went over there it was me and duncan and i think joey and we went next door and they're playing music that i've never heard before but everybody knows the words and they're all singing along down by the river you know like they're all singing along to these songs and like fucking hooting and hooting and hollering and like this is like i stepped into another dimension like what is this it is man it's weird that I can go into this same dimension.

[607] Alan Jackson.

[608] Like, I grew up, I didn't listen to country music, but I knew about country music because my granddad would watch westerns and, you know, you listen to Hank Aaron.

[609] Not Hank Aaron at all.

[610] Hank Williams.

[611] Hank Williams.

[612] And then this guy, Alan Jackson.

[613] I'm just flipping through the stations on time and I heard you know like when you go to another city you put on scan and going through the radio station trying to find radio station and way down town on the chatter hoochie this is the thing called me a whole bunch of loving and an oochie coochie and I had to find out who the fuck sung this song I was like in it here look at him look at look at that outfit when did that fucking song come out That must be like 1985 or something like that Look at the way he's dressed No, this is in the 90s No Can't be It seems like it's from another time Chattahooey Way down yonder on a Chattahoochee Way down yonder I just was stunned by the fact That there was like a whole other world That I didn't know about this country western world And all these people were into it And then I would do local radio And they'd want to talk to me about NASCAR Did you see NASCAR?

[614] Did you see what Dale did?

[615] And you're like, what are you talking about?

[616] Like, they were everybody knew.

[617] They knew about NASCAR the way most people know about the Super Bowl.

[618] I've been to NASCAR.

[619] What was like?

[620] One time.

[621] One time.

[622] And Dana was the, this was the first time that she was the lead car.

[623] So get there, it's an amazing experience.

[624] Like, we went into the pit.

[625] we went into the trailers like they have enough stuff in a trailer to build another car like they tell you how many cars they carry with them just in case something happens and they have enough stuff in their trailer to rebuild a car and they some of the pit crews are ex football players that got in this just for competition like I didn't know they had pit crew competitions to see who can change everything the fastest and a lot of these people are ex -football players that still need the competition and they getting it on and so we get there and I never forget about how when the race started all these cars take off and it's so loud and how I was rooting for the last car so all these cars were then there's one car come zoom zoom zoom Zoom.

[626] I was like, go!

[627] He like lapped him.

[628] He's fucking last last.

[629] But the incredible thing was Ray Lewis did the startup, did the start.

[630] Walt Frazier was there and all the attorneys.

[631] All the attorneys for NASCAR were young black women that graduated from law school and they were all their attorneys.

[632] Like they did all the legal.

[633] So I was like, but the audience is all white people just, everywhere's food, everywhere, it's like they campers and some of the littlest shorts you ever want to see on a human being.

[634] Like, God damn.

[635] Like, all this shit was exciting to me. I'm like, yo, why did she have on boots with these shorts?

[636] the shit's, I'm gonna.

[637] But it, you know what I want to go to that I haven't been to?

[638] The Kentucky Derby.

[639] I was in town one time when the Kentucky Derby was happening.

[640] I heard it's wild.

[641] I could not find, I had to stay in, across the river.

[642] Like, it was no hotels in town.

[643] I was trying to stay at the Silbock and all that.

[644] They're like, no. And it was so ritzie.

[645] Like, I didn't get a chance to go, but I would love to go.

[646] I heard it's wild.

[647] I had no interest until I read the Kentucky Derby's decadent and depraved by Hunter S. Thompson.

[648] I read that and I was like Jesus Christ and his depiction of all these rich fucked up people gambling and betting on these horse races and what the scene is like that it's this wild social scene of these decadent depraved people all getting together and I was like oh my God I gotta go I need to book a gig around it our our interest in the same thing comes from so far different places You want to go I hear all the rich people doing so much I want to see the chaos I want to go to the Kentucky Derby because the first 15 when I read about the Kentucky Derby how it started the first 15 were all won by African American jockeys and how the purse came about and the history of it and that's why I want to go I want to see the chaos well I'm a giant hunter as Thompson fan you know and so like when I read his writing about it it just like brought me there like I could I was appreciating his appreciation of the this just the fucking scene just the wild scene of it all and how crazy it was him as a writer as a journalist going there to cover it and he's covering it on acid and he's all fucked up and they're drinking all day and you know and in hunter's writing was always like that was always this wild mixture of pure exaggeration and fiction with fact and reality and like an assessment of the social dynamics like a psychological examination of the people that were involved when did he write about it that was one of the first pieces that he did before i believe he did that before he did his big sports illustrated piece which turned out to be fear and loathing in las Vegas 1970 yeah so that was and then fear and loathing was when i think fear and loathing was his breakout thing they hired him i feel like they hired him for sports illustrated to go and write about like a 71 is when that was published yeah it's like the same time and when was the first kentucky derby ever ran oh god let's take a guess let's take a guess i'm gonna say 1920 i'm gonna say 1890 yeah i think it's like 100 and i've done 100 plus 1875 1875 but when a thing becomes a thing like a place where people go and they know they're going to go get fucked up and they know they're going to gamble and like it becomes a thing they wear the big hats with feathers and shit and the ladies wear all their jewels what is going on here is this at the kentucky derby he's running across porta potty's yeah and people are cheering them on like this kind of shit throwing bottles at him yeah like they boom boom there he goes it's so far different from the original kentucky derby yeah did he fall in the shit oh no did he Is he covered in shit?

[649] It could have been raining.

[650] It could have been doing like mud sliding or something too.

[651] He's drinking?

[652] Oh, God.

[653] Jesus Christ.

[654] Oh, Jesus Christ.

[655] He definitely fell in the shit.

[656] Oh, that's so unnecessary.

[657] That's so unnecessary.

[658] But that's...

[659] He wrote a...

[660] I wonder if Hunter, like, caused more people to act more crazy there.

[661] Because his writing was so influential and so popular.

[662] I wonder if he probably accentuated the experience for people that wanted to go to just get fucked up and just watch but it's like you have the aristocrats the socialites you know the people that go there and they wear their expensive suits and their big rings and then they pull up and chauffeur cars and they get out and do a bunch of debauchery right after that like debauchery it's right after that just yeah i don't have on underwear on all this shit but i don't have on underwear like you think about these experiences that people have with like these kind of of places like if you're one of those people you're like some oil barren and you got crazy money and every year you go to the kentucky derby i imagine you just get used to being around all those other kind of people and then every year everyone kind of ramps it up a little bit you know ramp up the chaos ramp up the cocaine so is that how mardi grower started that's a good question how did mardi gras get started marty gras like carnival is a pretty intense i've never been to that have you You've been in Rio?

[663] Yes.

[664] That's wild.

[665] Oh, man. The, oh.

[666] It's like you're famous for people.

[667] It's like New Year's Eve on steroids.

[668] I went to this club called Help Disco Tech, and you need it.

[669] Help Disco Tech.

[670] I went on Adam and Eve night where they give you a leaf.

[671] You put your clothes up and they give you a leaf, and you're in the club.

[672] club just a leaf on that's it and this club holds like four or five thousand people all what leaves on and it's so crazy that the they know that you cannot get to the bar they know that you can't get to the bar they have bartenders with coolers strapped to them where they they end like on the floor in different places and they flip the cool up and they make your drink right there because they know you're not going to be able to get to the bar.

[673] It's insane in this spot.

[674] It's a live band.

[675] It's like 12 piece live band and it's fucking insane.

[676] And you, if it's 5 ,000 people, it's 1 ,000 men and 4 ,000 women.

[677] If it's 4 ,000 people, it's 3 ,000 women and a thousand men.

[678] And I know we went in, it was maybe about 12.

[679] I know I came out there with 8 .30 in the morning.

[680] I know for facts it was 8 .30 to the morning.

[681] And it's right off the beach and it's like this shit is insane.

[682] And you when you fall down it, like yo and you look, it's like people you're not even that you didn't even see in there.

[683] You're like, oh, she was in there?

[684] I can't.

[685] Like, damn, what was she at?

[686] Like, because you and your element, like, I never left.

[687] Once I walked through upstairs, I never came back.

[688] Like, I walked through downstairs.

[689] I went upstairs.

[690] I never came back down.

[691] upstairs until it was time to leave.

[692] Like I never came back downstairs.

[693] Like it wasn't happening.

[694] I was having a great goddamn time.

[695] Like I walked out my hotel and it was maybe like 30 ,000 people on the street, on a side street dancing.

[696] And it was people on a bus people on the street.

[697] And I just walked into this shit and I was like, I was just in, man, Rio was insane.

[698] They know how to party in Brazil.

[699] They know how to party in Brazil And I went to the Carnival with I think people don't understand that this is neighborhood versus neighborhood The Samba team is represent the neighborhood So it's like Just put 12 football fields Together Stack them up That's how they're coming down the street And it's people on both sides That's cheering for their Samba team it's insanity man I've never parted it had to be a million people in once like going in and coming out was so insane like I parted in I partied out I parted to concessions I party in the line go to the bathroom I man I may have had sex on the street like I don't know what I was doing I was fucking insane over there like it was I man I probably have a child over there I don't know I got married Look at it Yes this shit I'm over there I'm over there I'm over there on the side Look at the lizard Or the mushrooms Oh my God that's incredible And this is the size of that thing This is a neighborhood So when you win Your neighborhood Get money Like for the Everybody that's on this This from this It's from the same neighborhood Look at the fucking jellyfish That's insane This shit You got People got to see this shit live this shit is insanity oh my god and it's not one altercation that's amazing because Brazil's a wild ass fucking place yeah and i but they put it all aside for carnival yeah man look at this oh my god these floats are incredible these people on top of them look at the size of these things and this is an honored position to be a part of the summer team look at the size of that yo wow and they represent the neighborhood and this shit is bananas wow it's bananas I've been to Brazil a few times for fights they they are some of the wildest rowdiest crowds and especially when Brazil look at that man this fucking dragon holy shit look at the size of that thing how long is it take to construct these things man This is a big thing.

[700] Right after this, they start for the next year.

[701] Wow.

[702] This is a big thing.

[703] They represent and, man, this shit is incredible.

[704] It's incredible.

[705] And this is all themed.

[706] This is all themes.

[707] Holy shit.

[708] Like, I know America think they do live -ass parties.

[709] But this is, this is like 12 Super Bowls happening at the same time.

[710] like who is that supposed to be is that balsanaro could be could be like gulliver's travels right because those people were climbing on top that is fucking insane look at the size of that thing and they lift and he was laying down at first look at this this is what I'm saying oh my god oh my god that's incredible yeah I did a movie live from Rio and we we was at this you did a movie there yeah live from Rio with my boy Ben Williams What was it?

[711] We just, it's called Live from Rio.

[712] It was 10 black guys traveling.

[713] We were supposed to just start, we were supposed to go here, then we were supposed to go to Tokyo.

[714] Was it like a documentary movie?

[715] No, we was just traveling and hanging out.

[716] Just 10 men out and about.

[717] And so he just filmed it?

[718] Yeah.

[719] Is that out?

[720] Can someone see that?

[721] Yeah.

[722] Live from Rio on the cover is me and his guy named G. G got killed by, um, tenant like he um in his building yeah at his house like he was written his house out and a tenant killed him and um weird but i still have some i still have some of the DVDs that we did from that and who kid did the um the soundtrack for the DJed the soundtrack from after that um snoop and feral went to brazil and shot and shot their video shot a video brazil was It's fucking wild there.

[723] I think Brazil was, Amsterdam was a wild time for me. I had a good time in Amsterdam, but Brazil by far.

[724] Brazil, just the history of Brazil when it comes to wild shit.

[725] I mean, that's the birthplace of the UFC.

[726] They figured that shit out long time ago.

[727] They were doing no rules fights in the 1940s.

[728] Ilya Gracie was fighting people from Japan.

[729] in the 1940s.

[730] They would have these big fights that'd come over.

[731] Speaking of fights, June 12th, me and a comic named Steve Brown are supposed to spa do something.

[732] He said he's going to do something.

[733] I don't know.

[734] What do he going to do?

[735] What do you mean?

[736] Like a boxing match?

[737] Yeah, he saw me on the, on Instagram.

[738] He thinks he could box?

[739] I think I can take it.

[740] Oh, boy.

[741] He told somebody else, and then they told me. How much does he weigh?

[742] He said one.

[743] So he raised $2 .15.

[744] I said it.

[745] I said off the top.

[746] I'm like, yo, he's 205, 210.

[747] I already know it because he don't know how much he's goddamn way.

[748] And that's my boy James.

[749] That's my trainer, James.

[750] And he, Steve Brown, put it on there that he wanted to do.

[751] So I'm like, well, I come in town.

[752] And then people, there you go, Steve Brown.

[753] Well, people can't do this to me. You can't say you want to.

[754] box me you know my schedule i'm not gonna be in town until the i'm in town on the 10th and 11 well you know i'm out of town i say well stay around stay around and then we'll get it in and james soon as james heard it james like shit do you want this guy to lose any what do you weigh like 170 no i'm 160 160 yeah i'm gonna go down by the time we five i go down 10 pounds and he is gonna what Probably wait coming in at 310.

[755] And that's going to be the worst day of his life.

[756] He comes in 310 because he's going to be exhausted.

[757] Like, I can move around on him for at least the first round and then start punishing him.

[758] How many rounds are you going to do?

[759] He said three.

[760] And I'm like, oh.

[761] Make it five.

[762] Yeah, let's go a little deeper.

[763] That's me. I'm like, whatever, man. Because I know, I think people don't understand about boxing.

[764] This is a, when you're fighting.

[765] your mental condition has to be physical condition definitely ought to be in order but your mental condition because this is not the punching bag it's not the gloves and are you conditioned for a fight like spawning when you spar the next day some shit is wrong like why my neck don't move yeah because you fucking got hit somebody push your fucking neck to the side that you didn't realize.

[766] Like, all this shit is bad.

[767] Yeah.

[768] But body shots, body shots hurt, like, hurt a lot.

[769] Oh, yeah.

[770] And if you're not conditioned for that type of punishment, because you're going to get hit.

[771] No matter how big and how good you think you're going to get hit.

[772] And I'm not going to take no steam off of a punch for you.

[773] And I say, well, we're doing head gear, no head get.

[774] even the head gear is a problem head gear is not good I'd rather have no head gear I'd rather have no head gear can't see that good especially when when somebody keep turning your goddamn head gear yeah and there's a real argument that it causes more of a rotation of the head because it puts a bigger fulcrum like you have more weight on the head and there's more mass so somebody clips you and your head's spinning more and your brains rattle around inside your head more because if you if because you don't get your head gear turned and now you can't see and I'm a I'm a I'm a it's gonna be some more shit coming behind like is this something you want to do a lot of like is this someone talks shit and you were ready to do it I my my thing my ultimate thing was I wanted cat cat said he started boxing I know we talked about that last time has he responded he not going to respond because he knows the type of fucking punishment that it's going to man like I'm not going to lose I'm want to I want to I want to beat you but I think I'm easing up on him because um people I'll tell you need to let some things go and I'm like yo watch the special it's hard for me to let things go it's very hard for let things go but it's um I don't mind the physical combat of fight I think it's a stress reliever I think when you get a chance to go with somebody that's that wants to go That's the thing you've got to be with somebody who wants a box and who want to fight.

[775] Like with me and James, James is a professional fighter.

[776] And when he want to go, you know, let's go.

[777] And I know this is going to be a hard day because he's, no matter how the shit starts, me and you can start.

[778] And once you get hit, the shit changes.

[779] Like, yo, I know I'll leave my friend, but I'm going to fuck him up.

[780] Now it becomes a fight.

[781] I got to give my lick back.

[782] I got to get this.

[783] So it gets chippy.

[784] It's hard to find sparring partners where you can just spar.

[785] Yeah.

[786] Where, like, you just get hit like that, get hit like that.

[787] Where you're not getting lit up.

[788] Yeah.

[789] Where you're not in a fight.

[790] You know, it's just sparring.

[791] Some guys, if they're cool with you and you're cool with them, you could just spar.

[792] And you'd touch them.

[793] You touch each other.

[794] And you can do that a lot.

[795] And it's very beneficial.

[796] Yeah.

[797] Because you get your timing in and you get real rounds in.

[798] It's not fighting.

[799] but it's tightening you up for fighting.

[800] So you'll have these reflexive movements.

[801] Like you'll see a check hook, and it's just there.

[802] It just comes out because you've done it so many times.

[803] Yeah, like my man Todd Emmanuel just fought Victor Ortiz.

[804] Really?

[805] Victor Ortiz is still fighting?

[806] Yeah.

[807] What is he doing now?

[808] Him and Todd Emmanuel, I think it's on YouTube, too.

[809] That fight with Floyd Mayweather was one of the weirdest fights ever.

[810] He headbutted him.

[811] He head butted him, and then he tried to apologize.

[812] And Floyd said, yeah, yeah, yeah, boom!

[813] Dropped him with the left hook.

[814] It was like, oh, no. And then stopped him.

[815] That was, see if you can pull that up.

[816] It is one of the craziest fights ever.

[817] He fights out of the same gym, Main Street fighting gym.

[818] Like, with, um.

[819] So this just happened.

[820] Regis Provost.

[821] He's a fight out the same gym.

[822] Oh, this is on the Lemu undercard.

[823] Was it Benavides?

[824] Who fought Lemieux?

[825] Yeah, Benavides.

[826] Fucked up Lemieux.

[827] So, Todd was, he was, in, and it's how they do against Victor Ortiz?

[828] Big sigh.

[829] It was a good fight.

[830] Do you lose?

[831] He lost.

[832] I think he went to the scorecard.

[833] Victor Ortiz was a world -class fighter at one point in time.

[834] I think, I think, Todd, you know, when you're watching the fight, like, he'll hit me and give me some tips upon something.

[835] I'm like, Todd, I'd be like, yo, he was doing something.

[836] You know, when you're watching the fight, you know, when you're watching the fight, he was.

[837] Like, why the fuck, because you're sitting there?

[838] Like, why the fuck you keep doing that?

[839] Like, when they would break, Victor would just start, like, soon as they break, soon as they go back in, he started throwing punches.

[840] And Todd, he covering up.

[841] And I'm like, fucking don't do that.

[842] Just, and every time he didn't do that, like, he didn't cover up, he soon as Victor came in, bough, he hit him with one.

[843] Like, keep doing that shit.

[844] And I think that sometimes, because it's a mental game.

[845] It's like, it's also you're looking for break.

[846] Guys look to take a little break Let me know what you cover up here So here it is So this is when Victor Ortiz was in his prime And you know It was a good fucking fight I mean he had tagged Floyd And look at it There's the head butt There's the head butt And then look at this I'm sorry I'm sorry And then he hugs him He kisses him Didn't see the kiss Then And they take a point away from him And he touches the gloves Like I'm sorry I got carried away And he touched it began Okay okay okay Okay boom Bang That was crazy Fuck is you here by me I know, but it's also like Defend yourself at all times Like he thought that they were gonna like Be friends and they just get stopped like that I mean is the end of his career essentially Because he never really reached world class level Yeah, where people were thinking about him As being a world champion That was the fight and he had been in movies Right?

[847] He'd been in a couple of movies Wasn't he in like the expendables or something like that And he was in like a big movie.

[848] And that was it.

[849] The same attack on Floyd, he was attacking Todd.

[850] And I think Todd knocked him down in, like, the last round.

[851] Like, he got him, and I think the score call was too late or something.

[852] I don't know.

[853] How old is he now?

[854] Victor's got to be like 37, 38 years old now, right?

[855] If I'm guessing.

[856] 35.

[857] Man, so when that Floyd fight happened, he had to be in his early.

[858] There you go, he got him.

[859] There you go.

[860] Todd got it.

[861] Let me see that again.

[862] Oh, yeah.

[863] Come on hitting with it, bough.

[864] Oh, that left fucking the right hand behind it.

[865] Yeah, he got him.

[866] Shit.

[867] Todd got it there.

[868] 35.

[869] He's like, yeah, you got me. You know, it's crazy is that Floyd is still doing these exhibitions making millions.

[870] Oh, did you see the one he just did?

[871] Yeah, he looked fantastic.

[872] I'm sorry.

[873] He's like, I ain't got on.

[874] haircut for this shit.

[875] scraggling.

[876] I think he's enjoying that look.

[877] Going out, whooping people, it's like, for millions of dollars, I ain't got to promote this shit.

[878] I'm just showing up spying out ass, whooping.

[879] It's like, Floyd wait to get hit to see where you at with your power.

[880] And I'm like, okay, now I'm gonna fucking demolish you.

[881] He was holding the ring card girl's card and walking around.

[882] Do you see what he was doing?

[883] Oh, shit.

[884] He held up the card in between rounds.

[885] Floyd walking, He walked around with the car.

[886] He put on a show because he's like, he's, it's really smart because he's giving them the money's worth.

[887] It's not just a boxing exhibition.

[888] He's putting on a show.

[889] He's laughing and dancing.

[890] He's got a big smile on his face while the fight's going on.

[891] Chris and Crowell.

[892] And that was a guy who he had barred before.

[893] Would you fight?

[894] No. No. I'm too banged up.

[895] I'm too old.

[896] I'm not interested anymore.

[897] Muscle memory alone, you'll probably take somebody out.

[898] Just, just me and me and me. muscle memory I'm not yeah I mean probably I could fuck some people up I'm not interested it's a man it's an old man in our gym Main Street he he looks like a problem like just from he's so rugged and so hard that I would never even play with him like just go up and put your hands up just from muscle memory alone he'll fucking destroy you just like Like he just does it so much Like the shit is a problem Some guys can keep it up Like Floyd 45 years old Looks fucking amazing The best example is Tyson 55 years old And they're still talking about him Fighting either Logan or Jake Paul Like that is crazy And I don't know what would happen Oh man If Logan Paul Would be Tyson I would fucking just I would die I think Jake would probably be the better fight.

[899] Jake, whatever the heavier do.

[900] The better one is Jake.

[901] Jake's the one who knocks people out.

[902] Logan is more of a boxer.

[903] I would fucking just die.

[904] I can't believe that would happen.

[905] I would just, I'd like, because Floyd, when he fought Floyd, I think Floyd was really, when Floyd got tired of the bullshit, he just, yeah, he put it on him.

[906] He put it on him.

[907] But he's so big.

[908] And I think that he, I think that one in punches kind of just, wobbled the shit out of him and Floyd was holding him up like, yo, don't fuck up your money.

[909] Listen, God damn it.

[910] You think so?

[911] It's parts in that fight where Floyd was like, yo, let me show you, I don't give a shit how big you are.

[912] You're not on this level.

[913] Oh, he's definitely not on that level, but I think he was too big.

[914] And he was, I'm telling you, it's a part in that fight where Floyd snapped his neck back and I was like, oh shit, he's gone.

[915] And Floyd was like, you could see Floyd holding him up like, don't fall.

[916] Really?

[917] Big motherfucker.

[918] I don't notice that.

[919] I noticed Floyd was definitely outboxing the shit out of it.

[920] But the difference between Floyd and Mike Tyson is Floyd's 155 pounds.

[921] Mike Tyson's 220, solid as a rock, even if he's 55.

[922] He's on all the Mexican supplements.

[923] He's on everything.

[924] They use electrical muscular stimulation on him.

[925] You know what they do?

[926] You ever seen those things they do to build you up?

[927] He does exercises where they put these.

[928] He talked about it on the podcast where they do these pads connected to wires.

[929] And so he's doing these exercises And these things are like charging his muscles And it makes your muscles develop faster and better Oh shit Yeah, so when he got back in the shape, yeah My wife does that shit You slap like these electrodes on you And do squats and shit It's painful But apparently it has a big effect On the way your muscles grow I would love to go in the high box and talk to Tyson He's great to talk to him He gets so high just to talk to him about his stay in prison what was it like it was different than because I know this is the thing about what people don't understand about prison people are oh Tyson was in there like who gives up like in prison I wouldn't be scared because you can't be scared of anyone I can't show that or and you have to respond like I wonder what people because I know people in there that we're like this dude name Brown.

[930] Like I never I never really tell this story but with Brown Brown was a fucking monster Like I remember being an SSI It's like you're a custodian And I was cleaning up lockup And I didn't know what Brown Look like I just heard him He was in the cell, he was in close custody And he would be hitting this metal door When he was pissed he would be hitting this door Boom!

[931] Boom!

[932] Boom!

[933] It was like A fucking silverback gorilla was in this goddamn I was like, who the fuck is that is like all this brown and when you would feed him you got to don't give people they trades and you can't really see it's a little box when they let him out of closed custody I mean I actually laid eyes on brown the day that he came out he came out and he ducked it's like the fucking green mile and like I had never even saw the green mind like brown is a huge 6 -8 man that was fucking he was huge and it was another guy on the unit named Wien that was from Vegas he was black and Italian that's how I learned about the Pink Floyd album he sung every song he knew every song my favorite song was comfortably numb he was singing this shit all the time and he's this Italian dude and he's huge he looked like Louforyno he's huge and I weighed by what 1, 120, 125 and Brown and Wynn fucking loved me and they would always be fucking I'd be playing basketball and they would they had universal weights on this particular unit and they needed more weight because they would do the stack and they needed more weight and I'm like the perfect size and Brown and Wend you were seeing walking towards the court and I'd be coming down the car I'm like, yo, man, going on with that bullshit.

[934] They were like, man, either we're going to fuck up the game or you're going to come over and let us get a couple sets in.

[935] And everybody's like, what are you going on?

[936] Man, fuck y 'all.

[937] Y 'all ain't the ones got to go and stand on this shit.

[938] Like, I'm standing on the Universal Ways.

[939] I'm like, yo, two sets.

[940] That's it.

[941] I'm going to fucking step on your chest.

[942] And I'm on top of the Universal Ways.

[943] I'm holding on to the U .S .C. Brown.

[944] Yeah, this is what I'm fucking talking about.

[945] I'm standing on the way.

[946] I'm like, I fucking hate y 'all.

[947] And Brown used to, we had this thing.

[948] called Jack Mac that we would eat and most people chopped it up and put it in soups and with mayonnaise and all this other shit to make it a spread he would pull it out the can and just put it on bread the bones the skin everything he would drink the juice and just be like yeah yon stuff these people don't know and he was so big but he was like a fucking tame bear when he would talk to me he was like man my mama died all to kill everybody I'm like Brown, that's not the way you saw that.

[949] How old were you?

[950] I was, what, 22?

[951] You were 19 when you went in?

[952] Yeah.

[953] What'd you go in for?

[954] Being a street pharmaceutical rep, which is very frowned upon.

[955] Street pharmaceutical rep?

[956] Very frowned upon.

[957] What a great description.

[958] Street pharmaceutical rap.

[959] But meanwhile, being a regular pharmaceutical rep, you could do far more dangerous things.

[960] Yeah, crush people's lives, far more destruction.

[961] Yep, legal.

[962] Sanctioned.

[963] Yeah, and not only that, you can hire a lobbyist.

[964] Yeah, somebody to lobby for you.

[965] Yeah, hey, the world needs to use opioids.

[966] Yeah, more, more, everywhere.

[967] Fitinol.

[968] I heard they're not even addictive.

[969] Yeah, we gotta study.

[970] A street pharmaceutical rap.

[971] Meanwhile, somebody scratching at your door, Kack, Kack, you have more fentanyl.

[972] It's not addictive.

[973] Not addictive.

[974] Get him out of here.

[975] It's not addictive.

[976] Like, yeah.

[977] Okay.

[978] It's a weird thing.

[979] Last year, they had the highest number of deaths ever from overdoses.

[980] It's the number one cause of death between people age 18 to 49.

[981] Wow.

[982] Over 100 ,000 people.

[983] I'm still thinking diabetes, but.

[984] I don't think so.

[985] Diabetes is probably like number three.

[986] I think heart attack is number two.

[987] What is a cause of death 18 to 49?

[988] I believe number one is opiates.

[989] And it's all, a lot of it is fentanyl that's getting mixed into street drugs.

[990] Like people who buy ecstasy, they think it's just ecstasy.

[991] It's got fentanyl.

[992] Buy Coke.

[993] It's got fentanyl in it.

[994] So those people.

[995] Like that shit had happened, those comics in L .A. That was Coke with fentanyl.

[996] Me, I look back and I noticed that, I wasn't that type of person.

[997] All throughout my years of destruction, I wasn't that type of, like, this special is from 10 to 15.

[998] The next one will be from 16 to 19.

[999] But in that, I wasn't, because I didn't, I didn't, when the special when people watch it, they'll know that I'm not this hardcore criminal or I came from some bad family where you had to sell drugs and make it like my mom had a job and I'm just out being influenced by the people that's outside I never I never understood a couple things in that in this in that life I never understood as I got older I never understood why I was no honor amongst these why were you making these transactions so dangerous and so hard And then I never understood people doing things to their customers just for the, to stretch it or, you know, like adding drugs to the drug that you're selling.

[1000] Like, I never understood that desire in that.

[1001] Like, I still don't understand.

[1002] Like, why would you mix something with something else?

[1003] It's like, what's the, like, you have to sell?

[1004] Like, God damn, like, what's the deal?

[1005] Like, I just don't understand the concept.

[1006] They just want to get the most amount of money, you know?

[1007] Some people, they just, they get caught up in numbers.

[1008] They get caught up on what they can do and they don't have like a moral or ethical structure.

[1009] So I'm selling you apples because you're a consumer.

[1010] You, you're one of my customers that you buy my apples.

[1011] Why would I put something in the apples that's going to kill off the people who buy my apples?

[1012] Well, there's two things going on.

[1013] One, there's cartels, and the cartels don't give a fuck.

[1014] The amount of people that are going to buy their cocaine is endless.

[1015] It's the only way to get it.

[1016] It's coming in over the border.

[1017] They're constantly bringing it in.

[1018] And if they can cut it and make more money, they don't give a fuck.

[1019] If they sell it to you, you think you're going to buy what you bought last month, but you're buying a totally different thing now because they decided to try a new formulation with fentanyl.

[1020] And maybe you do one bump, you're okay.

[1021] Maybe you do two bumps.

[1022] You're dead.

[1023] That's the fentanyl.

[1024] deal like fentanyl that you've ever seen the amount of fentanyl that'll kill you like in comparison to a penny it's crazy pull out the image when you see it next to a penny you just go what the fuck it's like lead in the water tiniest amount it's the tiniest amount of fentanyl will kill you it's it's like a hundred times stronger than heroin like it's like being okay with a little water a little lead in the water oh what you say james it's like it can't be right because it's given to people as a yeah so So they're giving them less than that?

[1025] They're giving them less than that.

[1026] Yeah, they really are.

[1027] No, I know it seems like it can't be right, but the folks that are just listening at home, we're looking at a penny from 2012, and the amount of fentanyl that'll kill you will cover up the number 2012, and that's about it.

[1028] It's a small...

[1029] It's Lincoln's Beard.

[1030] Lincoln's beard is the amount of fentanyl that'll kill you on a penny.

[1031] Which is crazy.

[1032] And that's real.

[1033] Look at it.

[1034] Look at it next to heroin.

[1035] Yeah.

[1036] What is it?

[1037] This other shit.

[1038] Carfentanyl?

[1039] Oh, there's one that's worse.

[1040] Jesus Christ.

[1041] So 1 .2 milligrams of fentanyl will kill you.

[1042] And then 0 .2 of car fentanyl.

[1043] You know, value per milligram is $250.

[1044] And you have 0 .2 milligrams.

[1045] I'm quite sure my uncle took more heroin than that.

[1046] Well, I think you could develop a tolerance.

[1047] you know Mitch Hedberg had a crazy tolerance apparently you know Hedberg they tried to get him to clean up and he's like nope nope I like heroin damn yeah died on a sword I think that comics should be the most healthiest people like they should value their health a lot like we're on the road we're in different environments all the time you're traveling you're in different hotels like your health should be a priority yeah to you and I know some was we just thought we fall then you eating terrible food if you you know you're in a lot of these clubs you eat not the club you eating everything chicken fingers yeah shit yeah but you have to have energy to perform if you really want to be at your best you want to be vibrant you want to have energy you know if you're drinking every night and Oh, yeah.

[1048] And if you're doing Coke.

[1049] If you look at the guys who petered out, like Kinnison petered out worse than anybody.

[1050] But he was just partying every night.

[1051] It was all coke and alcohol.

[1052] If you go and watch Kinnison from, like, 86, and then watch Kinnison in 1990, it's like, he's a shadow of himself.

[1053] Four years later.

[1054] Shadow of himself, almost like a parody.

[1055] Almost like someone was trying to do a Kinnison impression at like a you know one of those um impersonator shows yeah you know someone does a you know like a Texas guy yeah Houston yeah yeah yeah we were talking about it last night in the green room there's a video out there see if you can find kinnison doing revival preaching i know there's a video out there of him on on one of those uh in one of those tent revivals doing doing like Jesus preaching it's wild man he was so powerful he was a dope comic him and um they ever now used to tell me stories about being with him at the time being around him at the time because they was all coming up together and sometimes people forget about the theater was a fucking legend she was a beast fucking legend there it is this is a 36 minute recording of it without video the last sermon in 1982 yeah You care about me, I know they tell about me and...

[1056] Yeah, give me a bump.

[1057] Oh my god, the sound is terrible.

[1058] Oh, he's singing.

[1059] I've been married twice and I've had my heart broke and let people disappoint me. I know it's like to have your own home, drive new cars off the lap, and have to sleep in a bar with no place to go.

[1060] I know one thing I never had God turn his back on me every time I was alone every time I was convinced that I couldn't know no peace or love again God was right there I'm telling you something tonight you can't get away from God you may think you you're in a place where you go well my life's real secure my life can't be changed I've got everything I want But I'm finding out something about age And about time That's it You're going to be here a long time Who needs change Your personality changes Different aspects of your life changed There's one thing that doesn't change That's your need for God Amen Scoot it up Scoot it up towards the end Let me hear it To myself I'm praying to myself You don't do something I've one tie my hands By the end of this year I just don't know if I can do this anymore It's too demand It's too draining.

[1061] People are getting the entirely wrong image of what kind of person I am.

[1062] Amen.

[1063] Amen.

[1064] And now I repent for it.

[1065] The day of that kind of life out there.

[1066] But I tell you this, I know what I've been commissioned to do.

[1067] I know what God called me to do.

[1068] I know what my purpose is.

[1069] I need your purpose.

[1070] Amen.

[1071] If I ever cross your heart, it's because God's laid me on it.

[1072] Amen.

[1073] If I cross your mind, if I happen to just, you're driving sometime and I happen to cross your heart of your minds because I'm out there praying for the body of Christ to pray for me because I need you.

[1074] Amen.

[1075] I'm telling you some, this world's about to be shook up.

[1076] And I'm just glad I have a part in it.

[1077] I'm glad you have a part in it because I wouldn't have made it without the prayers of this church, without the support of this church.

[1078] I couldn't have took it.

[1079] Amen.

[1080] I couldn't have lasted.

[1081] Amen.

[1082] I have one spiritual friend out there.

[1083] That's it.

[1084] Out of all the people I know out of all the people I deal with and talk to.

[1085] I know one spiritual friend.

[1086] You say, well, why don't you go to different churches out there?

[1087] I've tried, and there's nothing but the law.

[1088] I don't need to know about being saved.

[1089] I've been saved.

[1090] I don't need to know about being filled with the Holy Ghost Honey.

[1091] I've walked in it for the last 12 years.

[1092] It takes a lot to feed me. Amen.

[1093] The law doesn't cut it.

[1094] Your little list of rules doesn't cut it because you can't this is why the world won't accept it.

[1095] Amen.

[1096] The priesthood is going to have to come to humanity humanity's not going to come to the priesthood amen this is why jesus left the temple brother marty amen praise god they tried to accuse him of all kinds of things they said he's a blasphemer he's a wide member he's irreverent he's not a truth teller he's a liar he's belzebub he's this he's that and jesus said listen amen the well don't need a physician i didn't come for you i came for the lost I came for the lives without hope.

[1097] People without an answer, people living on the...

[1098] I'm telling you, people would do their job spiritually.

[1099] If they'd walk in their spiritually, you wouldn't have the drug addiction rate.

[1100] Amen, you wouldn't have the alcoholism and the youth that you have in this country.

[1101] Amen, but it ain't going to be done by rules.

[1102] It's going to be done by reality.

[1103] It ain't going to be done by little people.

[1104] You just didn't accept it because they told you it was real.

[1105] I saw it happen.

[1106] Wow, four years later, he was doing an HBO special.

[1107] talking about getting his dick sucked and dead dudes getting fucked in the ass by gay guys four years later I mean four years later he was the biggest comic on earth he's fucking look at him that's four years later besides you that has any good to it that can turn to sign a light into somebody's lost way do you think if you have to if your soul was riding on the line Well, You gave him a little taste.

[1108] That's impression.

[1109] That's not really.

[1110] You know, he's just doing himself.

[1111] Yeah, he's doing, well, he's just saying, well, that was someone that asked him, could you do, could you preach again?

[1112] Do you have the Lord still in you?

[1113] I mean, imagine, if you were in that tent watching that guy perform like that, I was like, God damn, what a charismatic motherfucker.

[1114] And then four years later, you're strumming through HBO.

[1115] You're like, hey, what the fuck?

[1116] The fuck just happened.

[1117] he I mean he must have been doing some comedy back then because if this was 82 and that was his last sermon he must have been doing sermons and comedy at the same time like look at that he's preaching there in 1975 so really developed his act preaching what's the show that comes on um it's about the preachers he reminds me which show um I think it's on HBO it's about it's about preachers God damn it The name of it fails me But these What's the guy from Roseanne That was the lead on Roseanne John Gooden John Gooden is in is in this He's the head pastor of his church John Goodman and What is okay I know what you're talking about They I'm talking about this is the shadiest shit Of all times Come on I think it's HBO Righteous gemstones Righteous gemstones Oh shit It It The Stemstone I didn't mean enough to do that Righteous Jimstone It's important man Oh from the creators of Eastbound and Down Is this a new show?

[1118] Oh it's These motherfuckers are crazy Danny McBride It's hilarious She's fucking insane Oh look at this They are insane Oh this looks good Oh my You can't stop watching this wild ass shit They are fucking It's on HBO There's a thing about those kind of high -rolling preachers.

[1119] Like, what's that fucking dude's name?

[1120] The dude down in Houston.

[1121] The, Joel.

[1122] Joe Olstein.

[1123] Shit.

[1124] Joel Olstein is fucking high off the heart.

[1125] Him and, um, what's my guy?

[1126] Those guys make so much money.

[1127] What's the black guy?

[1128] Potter's house, um, out of Dallas.

[1129] The guy with the hot dogs in the back of his neck?

[1130] The big guy?

[1131] damn i ain't it looks like he's got a stack of hot dogs in the back of his neck you know that hot dog fat god damn it is the guy that had that guy coming out to ceiling like on a on the ropes potter's house there's a lot of those guys who is the who is the reverend of a potter's house um that's the dude he's he's famous he's fucking super bad I don't know why his goddamn name is it yes not joel what is his name um shit I'm looking at That, T .D. Jakes.

[1132] T .D. Jakes.

[1133] T .D. Jakes.

[1134] That guy could have been a comic.

[1135] Yeah.

[1136] All those guys.

[1137] The charisma.

[1138] The way they deliver lines.

[1139] T .D. Jakes is fucking...

[1140] I haven't told this story, but it's a guy in Houston.

[1141] I was at a wake from my friend, Andre.

[1142] Reverend Dixon, Jr. Oh, he told the story.

[1143] This shit was so hysterical.

[1144] I'm trying to find a way to put it in my show.

[1145] because it's a point to it about knowing what you have.

[1146] He said he's up there, he's preaching, and he said he bought a horse.

[1147] He said, I'm a country boy.

[1148] I bought a horse from a man, and I rode the horse for the first time in a parade.

[1149] I'm in a parade, and I get by the band, and the band starts playing, and the horse starts dancing, moving.

[1150] I'm like I can't control it I'm trying to get this horse under control and I can't control it and I'm sitting and listen to the story like what if I can't be going to this shit and he said then the band would stop and then the band start playing against the horse I can't control him he's dancing I called him I get through the parade and I call the man I said hey man this horse ain't been broke he can't obey he said well what was you doing with the horse he said I wrote him in a parade he said okay what happened?

[1151] He said, the band started playing, and the horse started moving.

[1152] I couldn't control him.

[1153] He said, oh, shit.

[1154] Oh, because he used to be a show horse.

[1155] He used to dance to bands.

[1156] And he said, man, his whole point was, I didn't know what I had.

[1157] He thought that the horse was bad, but he was a show horse.

[1158] And when the band started playing, he started going into the routine.

[1159] And I was saying, and I'm forgetting.

[1160] Everybody else trying to get a message.

[1161] I'm in there dying.

[1162] I'm like, yo, this shit is hysterical.

[1163] I'm like, who bars that horse that don't know what the fuck?

[1164] Then it's a show horse trained to dance.

[1165] I was like Reverend Dixon.

[1166] That shit is hysterical to me. I'm like, and I'm like, you know, I got to find a way to put that in my act about not having it.

[1167] Oh, who is this floating?

[1168] That's what I thought you were talking about.

[1169] Who is this guy?

[1170] Oh, this is a Mississippi.

[1171] He's got known as the floating preacher.

[1172] Oh, he got, but I think he gets stuck like halfway down.

[1173] He got the Beyonce, he got the Beyonce shit, like the Janet Jackson, Method Man and Red Man. And you got stuck sort of was floating here for a couple seconds.

[1174] They're like, what do you do?

[1175] What do we do?

[1176] That's hilarious.

[1177] There's something that they have.

[1178] A showmanship.

[1179] Yeah, there's an entertainment value to the way they present that you could learn something from.

[1180] Because, like, that's one of the things that always bothered me about the alt comedy scene.

[1181] The alt comedy scene, specifically in LA, they didn't want to try hard, and they didn't like it when people tried hard.

[1182] They would get upset.

[1183] Like, if someone came on the show and like, how's everybody doing?

[1184] They're like, oh, what is he doing?

[1185] He's trying.

[1186] He's trying hard.

[1187] It's like a lack of entertainment value.

[1188] They wanted, it's almost like they wanted the bar super low.

[1189] And they could just go up and go, so, Starbucks the other day.

[1190] And so the barista, you know, there's a barista at Starbucks.

[1191] It's a, you know, fancy word for guy who pours your coffee.

[1192] You know, there's, like, this alt style of comedy that's, like, very low energy, you know, very reference -oriented.

[1193] You know, they put up, they say a lot of, like, obscure references to be clever.

[1194] And if you're, like, a powerful comic, like, if you're, like, a guy who's got a lot of, like, a Bobby Lee type dude who runs up there and has all this energy.

[1195] Yeah.

[1196] They don't want you there.

[1197] They don't want you there.

[1198] You're fucking up the shell by being too funny.

[1199] It's a weird dynamics.

[1200] Terrible dynamic.

[1201] With comedy.

[1202] Like, me going into the alt scene.

[1203] Because I go in there.

[1204] And they think that I'm like them because I'm slow and methodical.

[1205] And it's like, I don't think he's like us.

[1206] No, I'm not.

[1207] Like, it's a weird dynamics.

[1208] And then it's the same dynamic.

[1209] which is crazy to me. It's the same dynamics as me going into a hood room.

[1210] They want certain things.

[1211] And I'm not giving them that.

[1212] I'm walking up.

[1213] I'm sitting down and you hear people say, you're all right?

[1214] Like, yeah, I'm all right.

[1215] I'm just sitting down.

[1216] There's something wrong with me sitting down.

[1217] And they mind, like, why would you be sitting down and stand up kind of?

[1218] then I go into what I do and I have to win you over because I think that it's a it's a thing with stand -up that the audience a person goes and see they're not adventurous in their entertainment value when it comes to say like if you like a Bruce Bruce or Earthquake why don't you think you would like an Ari Shafiel or a Joe Rogan like what would make you think you don't you don't you don't you wouldn't like them oh they're not my style of saying so you come to an ali sadique show with a preconceived notion of what you feel like comedy is and if i'm not doing that then you sitting there like what is he doing i'm being the human being that i am and i'm a deliver if you don't come to my show looking for me to be another comment Right.

[1219] That's the thing that comedy has genres, but it doesn't.

[1220] It's like, if you go to see live music, you never see Wu -Tang Clan followed by Alan Jackson.

[1221] You know, it's like, it's a style of music.

[1222] If you go to a rock concert, you expect rock, you don't expect folk music, you know?

[1223] And like, but if you go to see a comedy show, you could see.

[1224] It could be Arrowsmith, it could be run DMC, it's, it's, you know.

[1225] It's, you know, It could be Whitney Houston.

[1226] It's like the styles are so different, but it's all under the guise of comedy.

[1227] And you kind of have to adjust for each individual's perspective.

[1228] And some people, they want to hear that kinnison shit.

[1229] They don't want to hear anything slow.

[1230] They want to hear like rapid fire.

[1231] They have an idea in their head.

[1232] Yeah.

[1233] A myopic idea of like what comedy is.

[1234] And I don't see it like that.

[1235] I see it as I'm going, like I would, it's people that I've seen.

[1236] Like I watched Ari last night.

[1237] and I died several deaths watching Rari like yo this shit is fucking hysterical well he's doing that new Jew special that special that he worked on for a long time this is that's it's tight this shit is very good hysterical it's very good it's very well written too I'm talking about even the the small nuggets that he said let me tell you the funniest shit like I had to stop watching because it was so fucking funny.

[1238] I couldn't laugh.

[1239] I couldn't laugh another second.

[1240] And I still went in the back and laughed more from behind, watching them from behind the stage without the audience just listening to it.

[1241] He said if it was a time, because it's so relatable, it was a time that you didn't think that you could talk to girls.

[1242] And he says, I'm sitting there that's so fucking hysterical.

[1243] The thing about holding girls' hand.

[1244] And he goes, he said, if I could talk to my 14 -year -self, I would go back in the future.

[1245] I'm like, look, I don't have much time.

[1246] I got to tell you.

[1247] And then he's talking.

[1248] And then he said, you're 14 -yourself, looking at your new self.

[1249] He says, he looks at it and he's like, yo, look, some shit fails.

[1250] Like his hair, he's going to like, look, no, fuck my hair.

[1251] Fuck what's going to happen to you.

[1252] And then he says, you're an asshole.

[1253] That's why people don't like you in the future.

[1254] Because you're an asshole.

[1255] If I go back and look at my.

[1256] 14 years, my 14 years seven, look at what he's going to become.

[1257] I'm like, look, man, fuck you, man. You ain't bad.

[1258] Get the fuck out my mind.

[1259] Hey, man. It's a great set.

[1260] It's a great set.

[1261] And my role manager, Dre, Dre's always with me. And Dre has probably learned so much about comedy, just being in the room and seeing the different dynamics.

[1262] And last night, we were he was in the room and he was like he never knew that white comics talk so much shit just like black comics like he was like y 'all all the fucking same like all of y 'all talk shit yeah like talk shit that that that lady y 'all talk so much about that lady bombing he was like he's like yo this is the same shit y 'all would be saying like yo man he is fucking sucks like like yo that lady would have got so it's comics that hate me to this day that I told them that they shit was trash like very early I'm like yo man you need to work on that shit that shit is garbage son like and now I don't do that like I won't tell you anything if you think that you good like that lady the disservice by this sensitive culture that you don't get what you actually need to be a beast in this game.

[1263] Like, your fucking skin has to be toughened up.

[1264] And this is what I say about the new generation of the social media comedian.

[1265] When you started, you weren't going to what they could just go to politics, how it raised politics.

[1266] so Trump only did interviews on Fox Kelly and Conway she only does interviews on Fox and I know this because I listen to Fox and I'm listening because I want to hear these interviews of people who never come on other media outlets to answer any type of fucking question and they call them softball questions they didn't give them fucking softballs so as a comic if you always get softball Like, you're bringing your audience to the club.

[1267] Like, these are people, and they fucking love you, and they come in just for you.

[1268] But you don't have a lineage of how you started.

[1269] Like, you don't have a, I used to be in the comedy store, I used to be at the seller, I used to be in just joking.

[1270] I used to be at the improv, and I'm fucking getting this shit together.

[1271] And one time, Joe came in, like, yo, the joke is hilarious, but you need this.

[1272] You don't have this fucking lineage of shit.

[1273] that helps you develop.

[1274] So you're just getting all softballs.

[1275] So then when you go into an audience, now you're on what I call one of these conglomerate shows.

[1276] Yeah.

[1277] With all different types of comics on the show.

[1278] And you don't have a lineage, and you have to follow somebody.

[1279] You have to go up behind somebody.

[1280] And you see the difference like, oh, you never had to go up after a monster and still get your shit off.

[1281] You never had to do these things so it handicaps you in this business because, yo, I'm on this show, you're popular and he's popular, but you got to go up behind Rogan.

[1282] And Rogan has taken the room on a fucking journey and now you're coming up with the hey, da -da -da -uh, shit.

[1283] They're like, the fuck out of here.

[1284] Like, what are you doing?

[1285] Then somebody else comes behind you and destroys the wrong again and you like oh it was the crowd like nah it was you it's the skill set yeah it's the fucking skill set it's managing the moment too yeah some things that you can do maybe after you got them maybe if you you get them going for 20 minutes then you could do a slow pitch shit you can do something where they trust you and then you could you could you could take them to a different place but if you're going on after joie dyes and joey dyes is murdering that's one of the reasons why I started taking Joey on the road with me because I bombed after him once.

[1286] I took him on the road with me in New Jersey and he destroyed and I did not.

[1287] I had a rough set.

[1288] It wasn't bad.

[1289] It wasn't like the worst bombing, but it definitely wasn't good.

[1290] It was like there was Joey.

[1291] He was way stronger than me. And then there was me. I was like, damn, I got to bring this dude with me everywhere.

[1292] I need that heat.

[1293] Yeah.

[1294] It helped.

[1295] It helped him.

[1296] It had helped me. It helped me because he would crush so hard that you had to be able to ride that wave.

[1297] You couldn't be nervous about it.

[1298] That's like half of it is enjoying the person who's on before you, laughing.

[1299] So you go on stage, you're already laughing.

[1300] You're having fun.

[1301] Yeah.

[1302] Do you know Jeff Sewell?

[1303] No. He used to be a booker for the Houston Improbs.

[1304] Like Dallas and Addison, you know, all of them.

[1305] I used to think he hated me because he would always talk to me about how great other comics was.

[1306] Like he would never fucking say anything to me about me. And people would, it taught me that you, your perception of yourself is definitely important because Jeff, I would run into other people and Jeff would be like, they would tell me like Jeff Sewell fucking loves you.

[1307] I'm like what he never says anything good about me like to who like he fucking raves about you like you're not there like you're like the one for him but he would always tell me about how great other comics were so Bill Burr wants somebody to open for him he's getting ready to do his special and he asked Jeff Sewell he's like yo I need somebody because I'm doing the Paramount in Austin I need somebody who's going to come in that room and fucking destroy this room and did I want to come out on a high who you think so I get a call to open for Bill Burr and I'm like okay cool Bill Burr he comes in my green room and he's like yo I know you're going to be fucking great Jeff said if you want a killer in front of you this is one I'm like what yeah Jeff fucking says that you like the man so whatever the pair of my hose is sold out I walk out there and it's literally two black people in the whole entire place it's me and an usher and I had on all black and I never forget when I walked out I'll say, hey, let me tell y 'all something before I even start.

[1308] This is the worst fucking place to wear all black.

[1309] And I want y 'all to know, I do not work here.

[1310] I don't know what the fucking restrooms are.

[1311] I don't know anything.

[1312] Because people were stopping me like, hey, you know what the restroom is?

[1313] I'm like, why the fuck?

[1314] People ask me like I'm not before.

[1315] And then I noticed that I had on all black.

[1316] I'm like, this is a bullshit.

[1317] And I fucking destroyed.

[1318] And Bill came and said, yo, any fucking thing you need for me. like you need me to help you in any way i will refer you i will do any fucking thing thank you and i was like jeff i was like thank jeff like i really thought that he was like yo you shit but jeff jeff's like yo you fuck it but he he just couldn't give it to me because he felt like i've been in i've been in this room since 2000 at 2011 it used to be spelled binders before it was the improv and he had a fucking rainforest and I used to go there and he just never paid fucking attention to me and when he told me he got sick he was like I always thought you fucking great like always like what I can tell you like I didn't want you to fucking stop trying to get it like if somebody tells you that you grade up front and you never you'd never strive to be better than that like even with with myself like i do an album i do a special and i want the i want the next one to be better than the last one i don't i don't see it any other any other way why would you why would you start declining or why would you go that because you it's different facets of your growth in stand -up yeah and i i think you can always be original in this in this business if you being honest about who you are and the growth you're not supposed to be doing the same thing I've been doing it what um almost 24 years I'm not supposed to be the same as I was in the first 10 years course not because the first 10 years I used to just joke about this story actually about getting body slam in a fight I wasn't ready this dude like we fighting and we get close and he fucking picks me up and body slams me and I'm like yo after you get body slam in the fight you fucking lost I don't give damn what happened after that you fucking lost it's like your shoe coming off in a fight you fucking lost and I would I would do this flip boom I would laying on my back and I'd be on the ground and I know the old I get I'm not going to continue to be able to do this shit right this is not a long -standing joke like the fuck this story because I have to do the flip in order to sell it like no I'm not so I'm supposed to develop into something a little better than what I was in the beginning the first 10 the first 15 and if you don't have a lineage how do you do that like how do you learn to get better how do you have a desire it's I'm like seed biscuit I see you running and I want to run faster to catch you but if I don't have that desire in me I'm cool with being number seven and thinking and having this illusion that I'm great but I'm only playing in front of the softball audience for me yeah you got to have a lot of people around you that are good too it's very important it's very rare that you go to a town and there's no one good except one guy it's very rare very rare there's like one standout world class comedian and there's just in a town by himself existing in a vacuum.

[1319] Yeah.

[1320] They're never.

[1321] It's a lot of great comments out of Houston.

[1322] Like, I've been around a lot of great.

[1323] Like, when people say, what's your influences?

[1324] I start with Houston guys.

[1325] The history is huge.

[1326] And I know D .C. has the Mecca and New York feel like they have something and L .A. feel like that.

[1327] And I would argue the point about Texas comics.

[1328] I would argue, like, man, we stronger than you think.

[1329] and we play we midwest Midwest comics I think talk from a different perspective because they don't have this this grandioso idea that they I'm L .A. and I'm New York or I'm Atlanta.

[1330] I'm like nah we're the Midwest and we got a lot of shit to talk about.

[1331] Yeah.

[1332] And I just think it's not a better thing it's a what's more accepted and I think the audiences in the Midwest are regular people and when you want to do stand that when you're doing stand up you're talking to regular people that's not got this I remember performing LA and it felt like the audience was waiting on somebody else like the whole I never I didn't even go up I'm not someone famous just like they're waiting yeah something like they holding laughs like I'm not going to give it all to you right man that guy's hysterical give it give it up to them.

[1333] L .A. is a pretentious place.

[1334] And a lot of the people that are in that audience either want to be in the business, wish they were actors, wish they were famous, or they're peripheral to it.

[1335] They're agents or managers.

[1336] They're jaded and weird.

[1337] And they're all social climbers.

[1338] So it's like there's a weirdness to it.

[1339] Like when someone famous goes on stage, like, oh, yes.

[1340] Someone who is of the caliber of fame that I, but there could be someone before them that's funnier.

[1341] And they don't even care.

[1342] They don't care.

[1343] They don't, they're not just trying to have, There's a pretentiousness to it That's more New York It's got a hardness to it that I kind of like LA's got a pretentiousness to it But when you're in a place like Houston There's all the pretentiousness is out the window It's just, are you good?

[1344] Are you good?

[1345] But that's like Willie D and I talked about that With the hip -hop scene in Houston It was the same thing When the ghetto boys were exploding Yeah When the ghetto boys were hot Like there was a whole different style of rap Coming out of this one section of the country And you had a respect it.

[1346] Brad Jordan Scarface was I'mtumal changed the cadence of people and Willie D and Bushwick Bill but then you have this whole entourage of other rappers that came by zero and slim thug and Lil Kiki and Big Poky and UGK and that's phenomenal that our first versus is about to be Bun B with UGK versus A ball MJG that's the first South versus Everything else has been in L .A. and New York.

[1347] This is a R &B.

[1348] This is a South thing, and I know they're going to turn up.

[1349] Because Bun is like, he's becoming like the mayor of this.

[1350] Then you have all these, like, Beat King and Megan.

[1351] Look at Megan Nostalian.

[1352] Look at Travis Scott.

[1353] Like, these are people that's from Houston that this whole, Toby.

[1354] It's this whole revolution of rap.

[1355] that spawned from the initial style of the ghetto boys.

[1356] Mm -hmm.

[1357] All that rap -a -lott records.

[1358] Yeah, rap man, Jay Prince, and then you had people that came down like Tony Draper with Swab House.

[1359] You had all these other guys that start, the South Rose.

[1360] I remember being, I remember the Source magazine.

[1361] If he could pull that up, the Source magazine where they had all of the Houston rappers on the Source.

[1362] And I remember walking through New York.

[1363] I bought it in New York I'm like yeah you see fucking the South is on the fucking cover of the sauce magazine Look at that Don't mess with Texas Look at little key Look at commillionaire Pimpsey slim thug Bunby Zero Jay Prince Little Flip OG Ron C Michael 5 ,000 watts My man right there Mike Jones And Scarface on the end I was in Mike Jones video back then you didn't want me now I'm hot you're all on me like that was a big and that shit said don't mess with Texas why Houston region won't be man this shit was like phenomenal you need that with rap and you need that with comedy you need a scene.

[1364] If we if Houston did that with comics it would be oh yeah that's the and that's the that's the overall look at the overall picture with little old and chingo bling you know chingo blinging do comedy now chingo bling yeah chingo bling is a comic man that's the the esg big hawk poker man it's a team like dmd like it's a song by this guy named dmd oh man look at man it's a great photo too it's the fucking squad that's on that's on j prince's ranch really yeah man it's like the Look at that shit, man. That's Texas.

[1365] And I was proud.

[1366] Man, look at Little Kiki.

[1367] Look at Hard Body Kiati.

[1368] Poki.

[1369] Man, this shit was phenomenal.

[1370] Man, I remember getting chills when I saw this shit.

[1371] I was like, yo, man, Texas is on the fucking map.

[1372] And when you talk about comedy, it's like, if we did that with comedy, with Bill Hicks and Sam Kinnison Thiel Vidal Brumman Billy D. Washington Roushine McDonnell um fucking David Raybond myself Marcus D. Wiley Terry Gross Kyr Space Dez White um Dave Lawson it's so many comics that's been influential and then we still we still have Shane Wayne we have the we have the whites man we fucking Bob Bigger Staff It's like some phenomenal comics Man We're like yo man Our R &B scene Man You watch the winning game No It's with It's about the rise of the Lakers With Dr. Jerry Bus I read the credits Too And it's an R &B artist A jazz artist By the name of Robert Glasper And I'm reading The credits And I pause it when I saw musical director Robert Glasper and it's just fucking a loom it's like fucking Houston is all over the place You see yourself living anywhere else ever?

[1373] Nah Just Houston It just It's in the blood Like it's H -town So when you decided to film your special You wanted to do it in Houston I wanted to do it Yeah I actually I actually I did it intimate but I'm still searching for the love from my city because I think that I represent so well and I think that my the things the people who are who spawned off of me represent well Kevin Isso and Bryson Brown and all these Kevin Isso has the show on Showtime um flatbush misdemeanor he's a writer you know and he wrote a he in the second season is fucking great show and I think that my representation of what spawns off of me and what I've done when I go out on the show like I never try to misrepresent my city when I'm performing on TV or anything because I I want them to be proud to be like yo that's that's he as proud as I am when I see somebody from Houston I want them to be that like when I found that thought Thia Vidal was from Houston.

[1374] She's been in all these great movies.

[1375] I was like, yo, she from Houston?

[1376] Like, I lost my shit when I found out Book of T was from Houston.

[1377] Like, fucking rassel.

[1378] I'm like, yo, anybody from my city that's doing something, whether it's political, whether it's art, whether it's educational, whatever you're doing, I'm like, yo, it's fucking Houston.

[1379] Right.

[1380] And I just see I just see I wanted to do it in the Toyota Center I'm wondering people that I want I don't want Dave Chappelle and Kevin Hart and all these other people that come to my city and play the Toyota Center or Gary Owens and Michael Blackson come to the improv and sell out 14, 15 shows and shit like that and then I don't do the same thing like that shit shit it's a driving force like how you get so much love or what did you do and I'm not an actor I'm not a I don't look at sitcoms and movies and desire that shit I'm a stand -up and I want to do it from the stand -up position because a lot of these other greats were doing it from the stand calling was in car wash with fucking one of the greatest comments of all time which is Franklin Ajai he was the fly in the car wash and I don't think that the movie was what compelled him what people wanted it I think it was his words it was his because those were somebody else's words I want to do it yeah well with my look at that man look at George Carlin yeah I like I fuck it like this is one of my movies like I like I know the whole soundtrack I love every song and I know every scene 76 yeah Wow.

[1381] Like, I would love to be in a movie like Taxi with a bunch of other comics.

[1382] I think for you, it's just a matter of a special like this and maybe, you know, more specials like this.

[1383] You're undeniable.

[1384] When people see it, they'll get it.

[1385] Like this year, I want to, I want to be the first comic to ever win an Emmy for a comedy special that's not on a network.

[1386] Because I'm like -C -K already did that.

[1387] He won an Emmy?

[1388] Yeah.

[1389] Louis C .K. won an Emmy.

[1390] Or Grammy.

[1391] He won a Grammy.

[1392] That's right.

[1393] He won the Grammy.

[1394] I'm hoping that my...

[1395] Can you even win a Emmy if you're not on a network?

[1396] Is it a television show award?

[1397] It's YouTube TV.

[1398] Is it?

[1399] Do people on YouTube win Emmys?

[1400] Hopefully it can have...

[1401] I think that I want to try to push the envelope to when people say, hey man, what they feel bad, you know, listen, I know that it was on net...

[1402] I know them other guys, it was on Netflix or HBO or something else, but it's going to be a problem if we say this is the best special of 2022 and we give it to somebody fuck those awards though man but it's one people give you your own award just by seeing you who is the deciding vote on the Grammys or the Emmys get the fuck out of here who are those people who are they fuck off the thing is to achieve some shit without them having to like I remember D .L. told me when I was on Bring the Funny, and I was talking to him, he was like, you think you're going to win?

[1403] I was like, but I went in it, my agent, Joe, Joe would tell anybody.

[1404] Because he talked me into doing it.

[1405] I said, cool, we'll do it.

[1406] I tried to lose every fucking round, because I was on tour.

[1407] I was like, yeah, I'd rather just do the tour dates.

[1408] I don't need this shit.

[1409] And he's like, going to do it.

[1410] So every round I was like I kept my shit packed Like I was like We're gonna go do the round I'm shutting these stories down to two minutes And 30 seconds to get the shit off And I'm just whatever job I'm doing cool And I keep advancing And I would call Joe I'm like I made it to the next round He's like Okay good And then And I was like Fuck So that I would make To the next round And DL By the by the third round now I got the taste of blood in my mouth like I want to win this shit now and DL was like I don't want you to win I said what I don't want you to win I want you to be the person that people wanted to win and didn't like what he said more people are going to see you more people going to come to the shows to see you because they wanted you to win and you didn't and they want and they wanted to come tell you and I sometimes I doubt my mentors like I doubt the experience I don't know fucking why and I'm like so then I lose and anybody who watched the show would see my face like I don't have a I don't have a poker face at all whatever it's on my mind is on it so they panned the audio I never forget that the cameraman did just like this so they announced the winner and everybody Everybody's cheering and shit, but this is my face.

[1411] Like, your face is right now.

[1412] They was panning like this, and that man got right to me and went the camera up and then did everybody else, because my face was like this.

[1413] I'm not clapping for that shit.

[1414] Like, I'm not, because I'm not, and when I didn't win, I was like, okay, fuck it.

[1415] And then people start coming to the shows telling me how they, you should have won.

[1416] And I was like, fuck he right again.

[1417] Damn it.

[1418] we decided to do this podcast again we did one just a few months ago but we decided to do it again because on the last one we were just talking about stuff and HBO didn't like what you said yeah and they pulled your special yeah and you know you have opinions about things you're supposed to be allowed to have opinions about things but when you have opinions about what they want to deem a protected class and that's like you mean we were talking about gay people and your opinion was about gay people adopting children yeah i said my thoughts and yeah i didn't the think about a thought i'm not saying i'm right i'm not saying i'm wrong i'm telling a thought now it's on the what i think to either be altered corrected more information, whatever the situation is, but that's not going to happen right off the top without me having a conversation about it and knowing that era is, plays a large part in how people think, the error that you grew up in.

[1419] And then your experiences, my experience with things were that people who was in a certain lifestyle that I know didn't want certain things that it wasn't a part of what they were doing so that's my experience that those are my thoughts in my career am i wrong not in thinking a thought i'm not out doing the rallying for it i'm just saying what my thought was in a in a conversation i'm allowed to do that i'm not saying that you can't have anything i'm just saying my thoughts I didn't think that the Lakers should have got Westbrook.

[1420] I didn't think that it was a good fit.

[1421] Do the Laker Nation come after me because I had a thought about, hey, I think that Magic Johnson is the greatest basketball player of all times.

[1422] I think Bill Russell is the greatest basketball mind of all times.

[1423] If you like Jordan, you like Jordan.

[1424] But I will have a discussion with you about the greatness of Magic Johnson.

[1425] But this was a discussion about whether or not gay people should be able to adopt children.

[1426] Yeah.

[1427] And you felt like they're not making children.

[1428] That was never a thing when you were young that gay guys didn't want children.

[1429] And then all of a sudden they do.

[1430] And you felt like it didn't fit.

[1431] That was my thoughts.

[1432] I didn't, I wasn't rallying for anything.

[1433] I didn't think it was hateful.

[1434] you know it's it's a complex subject right because what your point was is they're not making the children and what other people's points would be but yeah wouldn't you just want the kids to be in a loving family and if the gay family loves them and supports them and raises them far better than being in foster care far better than being abused i think that that's the the extreme that people put it on Like, I saw a dude who was giving this commentary on the talk without taking in the whole context of it.

[1435] But then he was like, he's been indoctured in this and his thoughts are, he's been indoctrined to something.

[1436] I'm like, no, I'm just, I'm just a human being and certain things in my era.

[1437] They're saying you were indoctrinated?

[1438] Yeah, to something like what?

[1439] Something wrong with gay people?

[1440] Like, I never thought that, nor did I ever say that?

[1441] Did you have a conversation with anybody about it?

[1442] Like, did anybody talk to you and say, hey, we'd like to know why you think what you think?

[1443] No, they threaten me with violence.

[1444] They threaten me with violence.

[1445] Like, a lot of people threaten me with violence, and I was sending my address to those people.

[1446] Like, yo, you bring that shit on if you want to.

[1447] Like, in what way they're threatening you?

[1448] No, I'm going to come knock your fucking teeth down your throat and make you, how you think that's going to make me change anything?

[1449] And what am I going to be doing while you knocking my teeth down my throat?

[1450] Like, what are you going to?

[1451] What am I going to be doing?

[1452] You think this is a fucking movie that I'm going to just be just taking it?

[1453] Like, yo, but this is, this was my point.

[1454] You, your first thing was to do was not to rationally have a discussion.

[1455] Your thing was to threaten me with violence.

[1456] Well, that's one person.

[1457] No, that was, that was, that was, that was, that was, that was, no person ever DM me and said, I would like to have a conversation with you.

[1458] about your thoughts.

[1459] Did anybody from HBO want to have a conversation with you?

[1460] Did you speak to anybody or is it spoken to your agent and then?

[1461] Spoken to my, and I asked for a conversation.

[1462] And when we had the conversation, I started a conversation off by this.

[1463] Do you think that I am a honest man?

[1464] I think it's not about your honesty.

[1465] Yes, it is.

[1466] Do you think that I am a honest man?

[1467] Yeah.

[1468] now we can have the conversation because if you don't think that I'm honest man there's no reason for me to go forward with this conversation right sitting across from me do you think I'm a home foe sitting right across from me mean you having dinner no okay I happened to watch new rules with Bill Maher's last Friday something I was tired came from the show exhausted turn on HBO Obviously I have no problem I've watched a lot of HBO shows I have no ill feelings about them They decision or whatnot No trip Still gonna watch my same HBO shows And then I hear Bill Maher Talking out the new rules And he goes In Like really lays out some shit And then Sam J shows comes on right after that And Sam J is a black lesbian woman that's a comic she has a show on HBO which I'm which I'm home and she goes in about how the LGBT community does not represent her as a black lesbian woman and she's talking to these these people and she's giving a whole candid understanding about how the shit does not relate to her same same thought patterns of understanding like yo explain to me why X Y Z and I'm sitting there looking like wow some people are free to say whatever they choose to say and some people are not and when you feel like you can handicap a person and she says on this I think that it's a bunch of entitled fucking white people that's pulling the strings of what and the lady that she says it to agrees and said I think it's a lot of people that lobby for power and they feel like they can take a stance on this, that, and the third without no conversation.

[1469] If you manufacturing the consent of anything, you manufacture, like, you manufacturing consent.

[1470] Like, everybody agrees.

[1471] But I'm a part of everybody right or wrong.

[1472] I have a different thought.

[1473] Your first thing was to less, because he has a thought and a person that may not know him because the person who knows me who wanted the special understands to a certain degree but it's not in a in their hand it's another person that has a this and we talk about it and we is it but this is a thing that I'm not rallying for anything but I understand I understand and I'm not that's why I have no ill feelings about their decision that's your decision to to not put me on your network because of expected backlash it did not come because people like it's a thought he's a expected backlash from you doing the podcast the same what you said and then they were anticipating that there's going to be some attack on you yeah basically but it didn't really happen there's few DMs a few DMs I got a few DMs and people like what What else is a goddamn heterosexual 40 -year -old black male Muslim going to say to hell?

[1474] What else he's going to say?

[1475] What the fuck is what I would like to see is people have a conversation about it.

[1476] Like it's a adopting children is a complex conversation.

[1477] It's a complex conversation for everybody.

[1478] And it's not just the skill of what you want.

[1479] You also have to understand that you send.

[1480] And if my son or my daughter want to do something that I know as a, as a heterosexual parent, I'm concerned about the shit that I do and that my kids I have to explain.

[1481] That may not be equipped to explain it.

[1482] And you don't have a pamphlet of information that I can go to to explain anything.

[1483] And then right after that, I did this joke which I think, I still think, fucking funny because it happened and my four -year -old she we in the elevator a man comes on there with a face full of makeup we got a full what they call a beat face and my daughter like daddy why that man got on makeup I'm not thinking about this shit right now my mind's on something else I don't have time to explain this shit I said he had a ban That's all I said He's the band I don't know fucking ban he ain't he in the band Kids Twitter sisters I don't know fucking ban He ain't he ain't in the band So my four -year -old is still like She see a man with makeup on She doesn't think anything but Oh he must be in the band But that's what I I don't have time to go into this shit right now With her in this elevator Right With this guy I don't know what this situation He could have bad skin I don't know what the situation is but the quickest thing I can say right now he's in a fucking band and that and people will laugh and then get mad when other people want to get mad with it like but it's almost like the Will Smith thing Will laughed Jada wasn't happy now he fucking slaps Chris what the fuck just happened Will you're just laughing but I think that if you are able to laugh as somebody else's disposition you should be able to laugh at yours because when I'm on stage I'm saying a lot of shit that people may not agree with you may not agree with the parenting style of my parents but you can't go back and change that my mom did what she did it made me who I am and you pick up things but man I never forget Mr. Reggie ran the day center and Mr. Reggie was this black gay guy and he was fucking hysteria and I asked him one time I say Mr. Reggie you want kids he said hell no I don't even want y 'all to be here I'm saying I'm like damn Mr. Reggie he's like me y 'all get on my goddamn nerds like but he I think that white experience even in this world is different than black experience because my cologne man Keith you have a cologne man yeah he he he supplies Colon was at the barbershop and he gets the best shit so and Keith is our barbershop and we have no rules we do not censor our conversation for Keith and when Keith comes in I remember Keith got his his fucking hair he got some hair implants and I'm talking about Keith has done so much shit to himself and when he comes in and I see him I'm going to say some wild shit to keep he knows he's getting it yeah and when he comes in Keith don't give a shit about what I'm saying Keith's like yo man you won't just cologne or not like Keith you just got did you fucking get your eyes done you got kids do you have on fucking cinnamon contacts oh you just out on the fucking proud today huh Keith he's like he doesn't give a shit about what I and he doesn't he doesn't care what I go to midtown barbershop he doesn't give a shit about anything that we say about him in their barbershop and he's not the only gay person that comes to barbershop he's been coming there for years and Keith he's a fucking crazy man but he's accustomed to that culture yeah and whatever is said that's not bothering him right because we're not violent towards him you're just talking shit this is a barbershop talking shit if you come in if you straight and you come in with some weird shit on some shit gonna be said about you it just it happens so Keith coming in I ain't seen Keith in a while I said Keith where you've been and man I had a little situation I had a little procedure I'm in the hospital and I immediately said oh you're getting your stomach pumped like I immediately said the shit Keith's like you're a fucking asshole Like, I'm just saying.

[1484] But I don't think that they understand how black people operate even in the space.

[1485] You think there's nobody gay in my family.

[1486] My cousin, though, I don't fucking hate him.

[1487] I don't give a shit about your sexuality.

[1488] So they want you to not talk about things as loosely, I guess, and not, and take into consideration that you would hurt gay people's feelings that want to be parents?

[1489] I would probably hurt anybody's feelings if I'm up there talking about things that I think that's contrary to you if that's where your feelings are based.

[1490] But my actions are contrary to, like I say on stage that I'm not a handy man. Am I really not a handyman?

[1491] Fuck no. I have been not handy in the past.

[1492] asked but now I can figure out how to fix anything and if I can't figure I'm going to call somebody to ask just like I asked people but it was all black people I say you heard what I said on Rogan yeah was you offended no I buy the fucking least but that's my I think it's a subject that they don't want you talking about at all unless you are like you can't have opinions unless it is their opinion their opinion yeah the manufacturing consent well and it comes it's not just about that Mario Lopez had to apologize because he was talking about children taking hormones to transition and he said he just didn't think that it should happen that children should take hormones to to become a different gender and he almost lost his fucking job and because he thought something?

[1493] Because he had an opinion about, and by the way, that's an opinion shared by a lot of medical doctors.

[1494] That's an opinion shared by a lot of psychologists.

[1495] That's an opinion shared by a lot of people that are very concerned.

[1496] And he almost lost his job because you can't have an opinion that even, like I told you before in the first podcast, one of my old neighbors, they're gay, and they had a kid, and they adopted this kid, and this kid was great, and they had a great family.

[1497] It does work.

[1498] I don't have the same opinion as you as far as that but you're allowed to have different opinions about everything in my mind everything that's the look that's what podcasts are all about conversations are all about I want to know why you think the way you think and if you have a perception and you have a way that you look at things and it's different than the way I look at things I just want to see why you think that way and you were pretty clear you're like they're not making children like this is a different thing like you're adopting a child but this is not the same kind of relationship as a man and woman who have a child and then raise a child and it's like it comes out of the woman's body and it's a connection and it's a different thing it's a different thing but when people do research they it's what they call a hypothesis you're saying they they they trying to figure out it what works it they have an educated guess and then they start working towards the thing that's research.

[1499] So you think something and then you start to go through it, pros, cons some things were like with the vaccination.

[1500] Some people got sick, some people didn't.

[1501] Is the vaccination bad?

[1502] I don't know.

[1503] Some people got sick.

[1504] Some people didn't.

[1505] I don't think the vaccination is good.

[1506] Cool.

[1507] Some people got sick, some people people didn't you don't think you should take it cool what's the what all these fucking non -vaxers yeah what like okay were you asking people to get vaccinated five years ago 10 years ago from other shit but not this new shit that people don't have the enough information on just yet so therefore I don't want to fucking do it right now right but it is another one of those things where you have to have the same opinion as everybody else.

[1508] Or they get furious at you.

[1509] Get extra.

[1510] But what does your theory do but cause more rage?

[1511] I don't think they're thinking about that way.

[1512] I think they just, like in this situation like the subject that we're talking about, gay people adopting children, I think people just want compliance.

[1513] They want you to comply with whatever the narrative that they're trying to establishes.

[1514] The same thing when Mario Lopez was talking about.

[1515] about children taking hormones.

[1516] It's like, there's a narrative.

[1517] They don't want you to have an opinion outside that narrative.

[1518] And if you do, they want to fire you from things.

[1519] And the situation with you and HBO is, look, I told you this last night and I believe it now.

[1520] I think it's good.

[1521] Not necessarily good to have these people upset of you, but good that you put it on YouTube.

[1522] Because the distribution is so much better.

[1523] You'll get millions more views, millions more views.

[1524] It'll be accessible.

[1525] Anytime anybody wants it for free, anytime you just pull up your phone, bam, you're waiting for a plane, bam, watch it.

[1526] Any time you want, bam, watch it.

[1527] It's always available.

[1528] Always available.

[1529] You'll get millions more views.

[1530] It's so much better for you.

[1531] And I think people will understand the thought process of a lot more things.

[1532] I'm starting at a...

[1533] I made decisions at 10 that I knew were bad decisions later on, but if somebody would have protected me from that decision, my sister tried.

[1534] My sister's like, nah, I don't think that's the way to go.

[1535] Sometimes you've got to learn for yourself.

[1536] And so I think even with, I'm a child and I'm walking through life as a child and I'm making a lot of bad decisions that I know now that will, I would never want my child to go through, hey, man, let me give you a lot more.

[1537] If I, man, I wish, I just want to build a confidence up in children that they will not succumb to these outside forces that's pulling you towards things that's contrary to your moral standings on things.

[1538] It's hard.

[1539] It's hard for people because they get to school and, you know, there's so many people that want you to believe a certain way.

[1540] Like, I've talked to kids that told me, and these are like 12 -year -old kids, that they were getting bullied at school because they weren't vaccinated.

[1541] and other kids were vaccinated.

[1542] And I'm like, what 12 -year -old understands the ramifications of getting vaccinated for something that they have zero fear of getting sick and hospitalized for?

[1543] Somebody said it to them.

[1544] Unless you're obese, unless there's something wrong with you, unless you're immunocompromised, the hard science on COVID is young children that are healthy children are rarely hospitalized, very, very, very rarely, far more vulnerable to the flu.

[1545] My kids had it.

[1546] The flu or COVID?

[1547] Mine too.

[1548] My kids had it and we tried to isolate them from my daughter who has allergies and we wake up in the middle of like she in the bed with our sister and her brother that both had COVID.

[1549] Like we're trying to keep you safe.

[1550] And she's like, no, need to be with my family.

[1551] Yeah.

[1552] And she never, she never caught it.

[1553] And they had it.

[1554] And my kids are fine.

[1555] My kids both got it.

[1556] And they were fine.

[1557] They got over it easy.

[1558] One kid just got a headache.

[1559] The other kid was, felt like she had a little bit of a cold for a day.

[1560] It's, it was one of those things, though, where the heightened fear, and they were pushing it so hard.

[1561] The difference between the way they felt about it here versus the way they felt about it in L .A., they're still scared.

[1562] They're still wearing masks everywhere.

[1563] I mean, it's so different.

[1564] Out here, no one gave a fuck.

[1565] That's one of the reasons why my kids wanted to move here.

[1566] When we came out here in May of 2020 And my kids were like Mommy I want to move here Come on daddy let's live here I'm like I'll fucking move here And I told my wife I will fucking move here I do not like where L .A .'s going That fear is hard to shake off That shit sticks like tar It's just stuck to people out there And they in LA New York People all up on top of each other Texas people a little more spread it out And he's like yo man I don't even see That many people get the fuck out here I'm not just and I think that with people are so quick to give somebody a phobia or diagnose somebody.

[1567] Because I like things in order oh you OCD I just like things in order maybe I just like balance.

[1568] Yeah you have ADHD because you can't pay attention to boring shit.

[1569] That's what it is man. I don't want to watch some weird ass Ted talk.

[1570] You got A .A. No, no, no. How many kids are getting medicated because they're bored in school, a lot?

[1571] I never forget my daughter.

[1572] Like, I remember homeschool had a phobia of, like, people, your kid's not going to be socialized.

[1573] Right.

[1574] Your kid is going to be this.

[1575] Home school is way better.

[1576] I remember my daughter, my oldest daughter, Jaden, she's a chef at James Harden Restaurant, 13.

[1577] She was in school.

[1578] and the teacher said that she was being disruptive in class and I went and I just snuck and looked to see what she was doing she was in kindergarten and she had already been my daughter was reading at three so now you're in there doing colors and numbers and she's in the back doing shit like that they're like what colors is blue and she in the back B -L -U -E Blue.

[1579] What fuck are we doing, man. She's boring.

[1580] She's advanced.

[1581] It's like her and this other guy.

[1582] I know his mom, they moved him to this school Longfellow that had a gifted and talented program.

[1583] They both were in gifted and talented all through elementary, all through middle school, all through high school.

[1584] Never was bored in class kids because they were being stimulated.

[1585] And you got a lot of shit to do So I think that that's a part of it as well This kid don't have ADHD This kid is bored at this goddamn bullshit As curriculum that you have They're like you teaching me goddain Non -interested teachers too Oh man non -interested teachers man This shit just bothers me And I say this and I know teachers get upset Every time I say this I get backlash But when people get upset about things You have to think about it I've seen teachers walk out for more pay maybe twice when we walk the kids on strike for more pay maybe more times than that I'm just going on times I'm just going on times I currently can think of but they never walk out for a better curriculum for children like they say the school system is not this not that and it's not challenging but you never walk out for a better curriculum they can't get together on the same pay We want to teach these kids and really teach these kids to the United States kids to be in the upper echelon of intelligent children and intelligent people in the world.

[1586] I wonder what we rank at right now in education.

[1587] Where does the United States rank?

[1588] It's pretty low.

[1589] In education.

[1590] It's pretty low.

[1591] Let's guess.

[1592] 36.

[1593] I'll take 30.

[1594] I bet we're.

[1595] lower than that so why not adopt why be so arrogant not to adopt somebody else's who's number one let's adopt that curriculum and put that curriculum and put that attitude in your kids go to school and eat what type of fucking food right do they have a do they have a five a five star chef back there giving nutritious food to the children one of the one of the things about my son when he went to school he complained about the bathroom being filthy filthy and and not having enough time to eat.

[1596] And he was done with the shit.

[1597] Like he went to school for three months and then that was it.

[1598] He's never been bad.

[1599] He was done with the shit.

[1600] Like, it's a kid that knows the quality of education.

[1601] It's like, yo, I can't even borrow when I'm doing math.

[1602] I don't, what the fuck is this?

[1603] Like, you taught me how to borrow.

[1604] And I'm a math fucking magician.

[1605] I used to say, I was a street farmer school rep. I know math.

[1606] I know both fucking systems.

[1607] What's the number?

[1608] Honestly?

[1609] World ranking.

[1610] When you type it in, it says we're number one.

[1611] So the first three articles I find, say we're number one.

[1612] And then they start seeing articles that say U .S. shows they're falling behind the world.

[1613] And I'm like, all right, well, who is deciding?

[1614] Oh, so now New Zealand is not number one no more.

[1615] So, like, the one that says we're number one comes from the U .S. News and World Report, B .A .V. group and the Wharton schools.

[1616] When was that?

[1617] This is 2022 or 2020.

[1618] And I got one that says they took comparing test scores.

[1619] rankings falling behind the rest of the world, 2022, they'd give some test of 15 -year -olds, and according to that test, where 11th out of 79 countries in science, much worse than ranking, ranking 30th.

[1620] But, like I said, when you type in here, like, United States, number one, education rankings by country world.

[1621] I don't know, like, who's putting this together.

[1622] Probably the education group of the United States of America.

[1623] 70 here, too, number one.

[1624] I got to wrap this up.

[1625] It's already 4 o 'clock.

[1626] Ali, tell everybody how to get a hold to you.

[1627] Social media your special is available right now.

[1628] Right now.

[1629] It's on YouTube.

[1630] It's excellent.

[1631] The domino effect.

[1632] And what your social media is...

[1633] Okay.

[1634] Got you.

[1635] Hey, it's Ali Sadiq.

[1636] You can go to Ali Sadiq .com and watch this special.

[1637] You take you straight to YouTube, but you can type in YouTube Ali Sadiq Sidiq.

[1638] On Instagram, it's Ali Sadiq.

[1639] On Facebook, it's Ali Sadiq.

[1640] And on Twitter is Ali underscore speaks.

[1641] You can find me at all those spots.

[1642] Man, watch the special, shed it's a special.

[1643] It's a fucking great special.

[1644] It's nice to be able to say that, right?

[1645] Yeah.

[1646] And it's available for everybody.

[1647] Free on YouTube.

[1648] All right.

[1649] Thank you.

[1650] Bye, everybody.