Adam Devine

[0] Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert.

[1] I'm Monica Shepard.

[2] I'm joined by Dax Padman.

[3] Hello.

[4] Boy, you know, one of the stars of her favorite TV show is on today.

[5] Oh, we love it.

[6] Adam D. Vine.

[7] He is divine.

[8] Well, you know what they say is Adam Devine is delicious.

[9] Is that what they say?

[10] No, they probably say he's divine.

[11] Oh, yeah, you don't need to say delicious if your name's already divine.

[12] You know him from so many things.

[13] He's an actor, a comedian, a screenwriter, a producer, and a singer.

[14] He's the co -creator of the Comedy Central series.

[15] workaholics pitch perfect mike and dave need wedding dates and of course our favorite show the righteous gemstones is he brilliant on that or what he is he's also got a new film coming out on october 11th called gexy you may ask yourself how does one spell jxy well it's j -exi xxie i don't know why i just that would have been driving me crazy if i didn't know how to spell jxy oh you just wanted people to be in the know ocd type people like me who would have ruminated on how are these spelling jexi I guess I would have expected it to be J -E -X -I -E, so great.

[16] Okay, great.

[17] But it's J -E -X -I.

[18] Great.

[19] We're all better off knowing that.

[20] We love everyone.

[21] We hope you have a blast listening to Adam Devine.

[22] One little reminder we've added a second show to Nashville.

[23] We'll be in Nashville Saturday, November 2nd.

[24] We're going to be putting on a second show for everybody.

[25] So tickets are on sale.

[26] Go to our website, www.

[27] W .W .ArmchairExpertpod .com.

[28] And you'll get a ticket link there.

[29] So please come see us in Nashville.

[30] Phil, it's going to be a big party.

[31] Enjoy, Adam, delicious.

[32] Ugh.

[33] Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now.

[34] Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.

[35] Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts.

[36] He's an armchair expert.

[37] He's an optoeuvre.

[38] The healthier I get, the more.

[39] sensitive I am to everything.

[40] You know what I'm saying?

[41] Like I'm pretty goddamn healthy now.

[42] You're really healthy now.

[43] I'll have a waffle or something and then the next day I feel like I did an eight ball.

[44] I feel like I'm probably in the last few years the healthiest I've ever been.

[45] Okay.

[46] But if I eat like a cheeseburger, my body just falls apart.

[47] It does.

[48] And what kind of symptoms will you experience?

[49] My buddy has like a pizza night every week at his house.

[50] And he like makes his own dough and like it has his own pizza oven and stuff.

[51] He's awesome at it.

[52] But we go over every Sunday and I gain seven pounds.

[53] Every Monday morning I weigh myself and I'm seven pounds heavier.

[54] Okay.

[55] Now, clearly you're exaggerating, but also you might not be because my water fluctuation, I'll weigh myself before I go to bed and I quite often lose four pounds at night through pain.

[56] Are you getting up to pee yet?

[57] What are you 36?

[58] 35.

[59] You're 35.

[60] Sometimes it's not in every night event it's not no okay i'm every night bad nights three times and i'm furious i'm so mad and then i can't go back to sleep this is led to a thing on here i am seriously you'll think this is a bit but i'm sincere i'm considering training myself to go in diapers again because my sleep is more important than fucking whether or not i wear diapers if i could just sleep through all that i feel like i would be much happier and healthier sure how does your wife feel about that She seems fine with it.

[61] Really?

[62] You pissing yourself next to her?

[63] Yeah.

[64] She has a low bar.

[65] Also, you've been with your gal four years now?

[66] Yeah.

[67] Okay, you're still together.

[68] Okay, great.

[69] So we're 12 years.

[70] I'm predicting for you in about 20 months, you'll just become this orb in her life.

[71] You won't really have any features or attractive anything.

[72] You'll just be this force around her, which is where I'm at.

[73] Like, people will say, like, I've gotten in good shape for movies, they'll go like, oh, I bet Kristen like that.

[74] Kristen has no idea whether I got in shape or gained 30 pounds, just oblivious to it.

[75] I feel like Chloe also doesn't care if I'm in the best shape or just a fat trash heap.

[76] Like she doesn't care.

[77] Oh, isn't that nice?

[78] That's love, you guys.

[79] Yeah, it's great.

[80] I think when I gain weight, she's like, oh, okay, then she can eat worse.

[81] Like she feels better about doing that.

[82] Sure, sure, sure.

[83] Well, that's kind of what happens in relationships, right?

[84] like you meet each other and you're both hot and then you're spending more time on the couch just cozy and over.

[85] Oh, I was not hot when we first met.

[86] Oh, you weren't.

[87] No, I was like the fattest I've ever been, which I'm like that, I'm glad that I met her in my plumpest state.

[88] Yeah, sure.

[89] Because, you're most rotund.

[90] Yeah, and then like I started dating her and then I got in great shape for a movie and tried to keep it, impossible to keep it.

[91] You can keep it, but boy, the quality of life really goes into the basement, doesn't it?

[92] Yeah.

[93] Yeah, like to eat almost no carbs and all that.

[94] It's rough, right?

[95] I don't like it.

[96] Also it has an effect on my boners.

[97] Did you, when you got in shape, did you go like high protein low carb?

[98] Yeah, for the most part.

[99] And did you notice any?

[100] My boners were okay.

[101] They were solid.

[102] Yeah, my boners were.

[103] Again, you were 33 at the time, probably, right?

[104] Wait a few more years and I won't be able to eat that way and maintain erections.

[105] No. Is that what you're saying?

[106] Actually, though, when I did it, I was about the, age you did it.

[107] So I was 32 when I did it for this movie.

[108] Kristen and I did.

[109] Sunday through Thursday was glycogen depletion.

[110] So almost no carbs, right?

[111] And then Thursday into Friday night was carb loading.

[112] And I would be a noodle all week.

[113] And then I'd eat like two boxes of fruity pebbles.

[114] Oh, that seems like a great guy.

[115] And then I would be hard as a rock.

[116] Out of nowhere, not even necessarily horny.

[117] Just I would be in gorge.

[118] But you have to do something with it.

[119] Absolutely.

[120] Slam it in a door.

[121] Okay, good So you're not wrestling with any of those issues No, not yet, uh -uh, no You're a virile young man and I envy you In general, how does your body feel?

[122] Not to the touch from the outside, but for you personally.

[123] Yeah, it's a squishy but firm.

[124] You can tell there's a layer of muscle underneath.

[125] I'm so envisive to that.

[126] I feel like when dad bods got popular a couple years ago when girls were like, I just like a dad bot and like that was like memes on the internet, I'm like, thank God, my time has arrived.

[127] Not a second too soon.

[128] Because I look like an athletic dad.

[129] You do, you look, do you look, well, you're too young probably, but did you ever, first of all, you look great.

[130] Yeah, you look great.

[131] Well, thanks.

[132] Thank you.

[133] I mean, truthfully, you look really good.

[134] Oh, thank you guys.

[135] Yeah, yeah.

[136] The truth.

[137] One of my favorite looks is Al Bundy, season one of married with children.

[138] Or your father on a righteous gemstones.

[139] John Goodman.

[140] In the early years of Roseanne, like you could see the football base.

[141] Yeah.

[142] He was a football player and there was a ton of mature muscle under there.

[143] Yeah, a lot of...

[144] And then some padding.

[145] Hard stridations.

[146] Yes, dense, dense, mature muscle.

[147] And so I just kind of like that look where it's like, oh, I used to be a hell of an athlete and now he's comfortable.

[148] That's exactly what I'm working out for now is so when I do have kids down the road, their friends would be like, oh, I bet your dad used to be in shape.

[149] That's the only goal I bet it used to be in really good shape Okay I had never met you Mm -hmm To my knowledge I don't think so I was co -hosting the today show Or some hour of it I'm probably inflating what I did There's just three hours Like four or five hours long Okay all right So I was on like the back end of that Whatever that time's the money hour After everyone's gone home Everyone's gone off to work Sure Shift change It's a great time Yeah, so I was co -hosting it, and you were a guest.

[150] Yeah, it was cool that you were doing that.

[151] I like doing those shows.

[152] Like, for the most part, like those Today shows, like, it's fun.

[153] I love when my mom calls me, and she's like, oh, my friends just saw you on the Today Show.

[154] I'm like, that's cool.

[155] I could not agree more.

[156] I'm not even sure I was aiming to be an actor, but I knew I really wanted to be on Letterman.

[157] Like, I wanted to be on a late -night talk show more than I wanted to be on Saturday Night Live or anything.

[158] Can you relate to that at all?

[159] Yes, I remember.

[160] I wanted to be on Saturday, and that was like my thing I really wanted to do.

[161] But talk shows, I remember, like, when people that I thought were funny actors and would go on talk shows and were trying to play it cool or, like, not being fun.

[162] I'm like, they lied to us.

[163] Yeah.

[164] Why are they being like this?

[165] Yes.

[166] Yeah.

[167] So I always was like, you got to just go for it.

[168] And that's why I love, like, Chris Farley, when he would go out on a, he only did a few talk shows before he.

[169] passed away and he would go and do cartwheels and like jump on the tear the place up yeah yes it's fun or will feral like i think some of his best performances in movies and or sarian life are on like conan or these other talk shows were sure he wrote it out he's in a character yeah did you like hosting the today show i did i did like it you know what i like about it and i'm sure you've experienced this in many different ways but when you can feel the malleability of time that time passes differently in different situations.

[170] Yeah.

[171] I'm fascinated by that because that was an hour -long show that we hosted and to me it felt like seven and a half minutes.

[172] For sure.

[173] Because it's just flying and all of a sudden you're like, And there's so many bits to run through and different segments to pitch too.

[174] It's like working in a restaurant when it's like slammed.

[175] You're just like, oh, blah, blah.

[176] And then all of a sudden you look up and you're like, oh my God, two hours flew by.

[177] I kind of, I don't know why I just enjoy when it warps like that.

[178] Yeah, that's cool.

[179] I feel like I always would like to, do something like that?

[180] Like what you did, a guest hosting spot.

[181] Yeah.

[182] Like, I don't know if I would like to have my own today show.

[183] Like, to be the new Matt Lauer with the button in all.

[184] Sure.

[185] Two buttons.

[186] Yeah.

[187] But I would have more buttons.

[188] I don't know why he stopped there.

[189] But, like, to be the new guy.

[190] One button, that's a problem.

[191] Three buttons, that's James Bond.

[192] He's fun.

[193] This guy likes to party.

[194] Yeah, I'm like, I don't know if I could handle doing that every day.

[195] Like, because what's fun about our jobs is, like, it changes all the time.

[196] Yes.

[197] Like, you go and you do a show, but that's only for a few months of the year, and then you could go off and do movies, or I do stand -up, or you do the podcast, and you can do all different kinds of things.

[198] But I'm like, every day showing up at, like, 4 a .m. And being chipper every morning, and never, you can never have, like, any real opinions on things.

[199] You're just...

[200] It's true.

[201] You know what I mean?

[202] I'm more...

[203] of the mindset, like, I just love to do, I want to, like, look back when I'm old and be like, oh, I did a lot of weird stuff.

[204] Yeah, yeah.

[205] Like, I did all the stuff.

[206] Like, when I hosted the MTV Movie Awards, it was like, I remember I was on tour doing stand -up and I was on my tour bus.

[207] And I remember got the call and I was just silent for, like, 30 seconds of my agents are like, is this a good silent?

[208] And I'm like, yeah.

[209] So excited.

[210] And I was excited, but like...

[211] Were you scared as well?

[212] It was nerve -wracking because I was shooting a movie.

[213] I finished this tour and went right into a movie, so I had no time to, like, I had, like, two weeks to be in the writer's room to figure out what we were doing.

[214] Yeah.

[215] So, like, I had this whole, like, song and dance number dressed as the beast at the opening of the movie awards, and I had, I had, like, three hours to learn the song the day before.

[216] And so, yeah, it was, like, trial by fire.

[217] But it's fun when you put yourself in that situation, like, I only got it right all the way through one time.

[218] Uh -huh.

[219] And then the next day, we didn't have time to run the whole thing, we just did it, and it worked.

[220] Yeah, I kind of compare it to talking to a girl you don't know.

[221] Something happens to my adrenaline that kicks my brain into a gear that just I can't access unless I'm trying to impress a girl.

[222] That's when it's at its best, traditionally over my life.

[223] And so also the stakes of failing on TV, that also can kick me into that hyperzone where I don't really know how to access without the stakes.

[224] Absolutely.

[225] I think that's why S &L performers have that extra gear and why so many of them have gone on to be so successful because it is something about like being in front of a crowd.

[226] You've been there, right?

[227] I've been there, yeah, yeah, I've watched the show.

[228] Yeah, and it's like, it's pretty small.

[229] Like, that's a small crowd, but then you realize there's, you know.

[230] But that stage when I saw it in real life, it gave me the chills when I looked at it.

[231] Oh, yeah, for sure.

[232] Like, I'm not religious, but I feel like that's what would be standing in St. Peter's or something if I was really.

[233] Yeah, I was just like, my goodness, I steered at the psych that they come out of and I was like, God, I just started thinking of everyone I've seen walk out there and do that monologue.

[234] And it just, it's cool too, like when you do, I would love to host.

[235] But when you like see places like that and then you see the Tonight Show or Kimmel or whatever and like things that you've kind of grown up watching and then you see how tiny it is when you're actually there.

[236] I've had the exact same experience.

[237] It's always the same reaction.

[238] Like, holy shit, this place is tiny.

[239] Yeah.

[240] With the exception of Letterman's old studio and now Colbert's, that's a pretty big place.

[241] You've done Colbert, I'm sure.

[242] And I was able to do Letterman before we retired too.

[243] Oh, you did.

[244] Yeah, it was like six months before he retired.

[245] I was so excited.

[246] Oh.

[247] And then he leaned over after our segment, and he was like, I'm a big fan of workaholics.

[248] I've seen every episode.

[249] Oh, wow.

[250] I'm like, my brain just melted.

[251] And then I really wanted to talk to him about it, but the guy was already dragging me away, going this way.

[252] And I'm like, but he said, but he said nice things to me. Well, what we do when we write it?

[253] Okay, yeah.

[254] Oh, you mean like every show?

[255] You sit around the table together?

[256] Oh, okay.

[257] Interesting.

[258] I could have leaned over and kissed him.

[259] Do you remember that like really old man who told you was time to go?

[260] I guess he'd been there for, like, he's the guy.

[261] that like taps you to walk out oh oh yes yes every one of the they have somebody that does that yeah like stage manager type person yeah and letterman's guy i guess had been there since like someone told me he's like there since carson uh they're like oh he's been there maybe someone was lying to me it's just someone's nice grandfather that was working for the day but uh but this guy has been there forever and he goes now like to go and to like he touched me and then i acted scared I was like, oh, like, just to fuck with him.

[262] And then he goes, now, like, it really was time to go.

[263] And I'm like, oh, man. And I stepped out, and you have to take a hard right turn.

[264] Oh, yeah.

[265] And I walked right into the pole.

[266] I walked right into this pool.

[267] And the camera caught me right as I'm ricocheting off this pole.

[268] And so my family and friends were like, where are you doing like a fun dance when you walked in?

[269] Or what was?

[270] Yeah, did it read as a bit?

[271] It read like I Yeah, it read just like I'm coming in Walking All Goofy But in fact I just rocked myself Wow Have you ever shit the bed on a talk show or?

[272] I did not well on Conan once I wouldn't say I shit the bed But I remember Like a joke kind of fell flat And then like I tried to say Live from New York at Saturday Night Live In like a bit And I said live from Saturday night And he's like, what?

[273] And I'm like, I don't know.

[274] And then I tried to say a word and it just came out wrong.

[275] And he's like, oh, you're not really on today, are you?

[276] And I'm like, no, Conan, I'm not.

[277] But I've been on it.

[278] I've been on Conan like eight times now.

[279] So I think he trusted that it was an off day.

[280] Just some days it's just, you know, a little cloudy up there.

[281] So I'm sure you're sick of telling it, but I also don't think anyone could possibly understand you without this story.

[282] Which is when you're a little kid, you're about to.

[283] across the road pushing your bicycle?

[284] Yeah.

[285] And what happens?

[286] You don't win the lottery.

[287] And someone popped out of the manhole cover.

[288] The turtles are real.

[289] No, I was walking across the street.

[290] This is in Omaha?

[291] Omaha, Nebraska.

[292] Okay, you're born in Iowa, but you moved to Omaha.

[293] I'm born in Waterloo, Iowa, and lived there until I moved to Omaha when I was 10.

[294] And so I'm 11 now.

[295] I've been there about six months.

[296] It was the summer going into sixth grade.

[297] I made a few new friends.

[298] and we're going to the convenience store.

[299] And my buddy was across the street and he was yelling, come on.

[300] And I took that as the coast is clear, come on.

[301] But what he just meant, come on, let's go to the convenience store.

[302] I'm a child, I want to eat candy.

[303] Yeah, I'm impatient.

[304] Yeah, and I grew up in the suburbs so new houses were being built every day.

[305] And so three cements are going up the hill and two are coming down at the exact same time.

[306] And so after the third one passed going up the hill on my side of the street I walk out with my bicycle and was hit by the cement truck coming down the other side at 11 years old at 11 taken under the wheel spit out broke everything from my waist down besides my right femur and then crushed everything from the knees down and took all my skin off you were in a coma for two weeks you had a collapsed lung everything's broken below the waist and they're probably talking amputation.

[307] My parents did a good job of like shielding me because I didn't, you know, they're not coming up to an 11 -year -old boy going, they're going to take your legs.

[308] We'll be right back.

[309] Take a good look at your legs.

[310] Okay.

[311] They're going to take them.

[312] At 3 p .m. You don't have them anymore.

[313] There's a 30 % chance that they're gone.

[314] So just so you know.

[315] But they were saying they're probably going to have to take them.

[316] Then it was, they're going to have to take one.

[317] Then just my right heel.

[318] Okay.

[319] And then it ended up being I got to keep both legs.

[320] And how long are you in the hospital?

[321] I was in the hospital for almost two months, like, I think like six or seven weeks, something like that.

[322] And what is your reaction to being there?

[323] Are you, do you feel a stupid that happened?

[324] Do you feel grateful you're alive?

[325] Do you feel scared?

[326] You're never going to walk.

[327] I was on like so many drugs.

[328] That was going to be one of my questions sincerely.

[329] That it was like, I was just floating.

[330] I was just there.

[331] Sure.

[332] And I was still just, you know, I'm 11 years old, so I'm still like a kid.

[333] And it hurt a lot.

[334] Like, even with all the drugs, I knew that this is painful, and I'm in traction.

[335] And there's pins through my knees and that are holding them up.

[336] Yeah.

[337] And, you know, every adult in my life is standing over me, just crying, just staring at me. I'm like, that would be the scariest part.

[338] I'm like, I guess this is real.

[339] Like, I've never seen.

[340] My dad is, like, a tough guy, you know.

[341] What does he do or what did he do?

[342] He just retired.

[343] He was a conductor for the railroad for 35 years.

[344] Never saw him cry.

[345] Right.

[346] And then he's just like.

[347] shaking and bawling and I'm like oh my god yeah I'm like pussy no and so uh that's when I knew like it was real yeah do you have a memory of that actual experience or does it just feel no I don't remember like what happens when you have a dramatic event like that my body went into shock and I can't remember like a few hours beforehand and then two weeks afterwards because I was in a medically induced coma right yeah What if it was later discovered you had murdered someone in that?

[348] Two hours before?

[349] And you were actually running.

[350] Good movie idea attacks.

[351] So, and then what follows is 26 surgeries.

[352] Fucking A. Over how many years?

[353] By my freshman year of high school.

[354] So like 26 within that time.

[355] Right.

[356] And then I busted my knee a handful of times since then.

[357] How did you do junior high?

[358] Were you homeschooled during that period?

[359] Or were you going in a wheelchair?

[360] I was homeschooled for half of my sixth grade year and then I went in a wheelchair.

[361] In hindsight, it actually worked out for me because, like, they had an announcement at school.

[362] Like, it was in the bulletin.

[363] Like, parents were talking to their kids to, like, be nice to me. Oh.

[364] I'm the new kid.

[365] Like, no one knew who I was before starting school there.

[366] Right.

[367] And then all of a sudden I go and now everyone knows who I am and everyone's being pretty nice to me, even though kids can be dicks.

[368] Sure, sure.

[369] Well, I would have been the kid that was like started maybe being nice.

[370] to you and then I would have seen how much attention you were getting out and got jealous and maybe I would have had to take a shot at you yeah there was there was some of that for sure I ran into a few you but no I don't think I would yeah but I think that's like kind of why I got into comedy because up until then like I'm a kid but I was like I'm a jock I'm an athlete I'm gonna be a professional baseball player that's all there is to it yeah and then after that you need a new identity basically I couldn't do anything and then anytime anyone would like make fun of me. My dad's like, you can't get in a fight, so you've got to punch them back with your words.

[371] Like, think of some funny things to say back to them.

[372] So I would go home and I'd write in notebooks, like possible mean things that people could say to me and retorts.

[373] So I just had like notebooks and notebooks full of slams on these kids.

[374] And so I would just annihilate them.

[375] And then no one could beat up the kid in the wheelchair who can't defend himself.

[376] So it's not a super tough look.

[377] Yeah.

[378] Yeah.

[379] Yeah.

[380] But, but the time you get to high school you're now done with the wheelchair or were there periods as well in high school no i was done with the wheelchair i busted my knee again like playing basketball but that was back on crutches and then and then off the crutches okay so with all these surgeries 26 you're on opiates and stuff all the time right on and off them what was your relationship with like did you come to like them did you come to look forward no i hate them i hated them you hated them yeah i don't like the feeling of not having my wits about me And I feel like those pain killers just dumb you down and slow everything down and make you not feel anything.

[381] And I don't like to be the dumbest guy in the room.

[382] Yeah.

[383] You know what I mean?

[384] Sure.

[385] Although normally I am.

[386] In real life I am.

[387] I don't need opioids for this.

[388] I got this covered.

[389] Did you at all have a sense of that pause had been hit on your life?

[390] When I was thinking about your situation, I was like, is this an adult perspective to feel this way?

[391] or would you be aware of it as a kid like oh my god i'm missing like the three years i would be most riding my bike most going out and building for all these things did you i feel like 11 is when you start to like stop doing stuff like that at least like you know like 11 is when you are like no i'm grown up now right so like for me i did a lot of that when i was younger and i reverted back to like my youth instead of like all those kids were like sneaking off and like smoking cigarettes and like 12 and 13, starting, like, steal their parents' vodka and, like, mixing it with their Gatorade.

[392] Yeah.

[393] I was just watching Renan Stimpy.

[394] Banging back oxycodone.

[395] Yeah, I just smash it in my oxies.

[396] Just selling them for pogs.

[397] Pogs.

[398] And so, like, I really was just, like, a true kid.

[399] Again, when everyone else was sort of growing up, I was just, like, watching.

[400] They gave me a free membership to Main Street movies, which is our local.

[401] like blockbuster oh you know the local one mom and pop shop and they were like as many movies as you want to rent for as long as you want to rent them oh wow so they gave that to us for like three years and then they're like okay you're taking advantage of this so like I truly saw like every movie and that's all I did was watch movies and watch comedy and you liked comedy the most yeah comedy in action okay so you're born 83 yep okay so eight years for me it was all Fletch and Chevy Chase movies and all that in early Bill Murray.

[402] But for you, who was it, Sandler?

[403] It was Sandler and Farley.

[404] Uh -huh.

[405] That whole crew.

[406] Yeah.

[407] Oh, my God.

[408] Yeah.

[409] My buddy Kyle knew a check who I did workaholics with.

[410] He just directed murder mystery.

[411] And Sandler texted him and was like, hey, tell your boy Adam that I really liked your stand -up special because they just had a stand -up special come out.

[412] Right.

[413] What's the name?

[414] Adam Devine's Best Time of Your Lives.

[415] Yes, Adam Devon's best time of your life.

[416] That's what you were promoting when I met you at the Today Show.

[417] Yeah, exactly.

[418] and uh yeah and he was like he liked it and i'm like done oh my god just on the moon yeah because yeah he was they were my guys and now you liked it so much what what age do you think like oh i'm going to somehow try to pursue this is that in college no it was like really young actually like i couldn't walk when i you know 13 12 13 and i started calling into the radio stations and you'd do impressions i would do different impressions and i do like chris farley and like a guy who's just stuck in traffic and everything pisses him off and some like dumb girl voice that I would do and they kind of caught on on the radio it was like part of their like afternoon hour they were like come down we want to put you on every day you're like you can be part of our staff no way yeah and I'm like awesome so I my mom drives me down there and I never talk to them and not in character I was always in character because I was afraid they'd get mad if they knew I was a little kid in a wheelchair and so I I go, and I meet this wheelchair, and I meet them, oh, you're a little kid in a wheelchair.

[419] And I'm like, yeah, I am sorry.

[420] And they're like, well, we can't.

[421] You can't employ you.

[422] But if you keep calling in, they would give me free concert tickets and free CDs and, you know, all that.

[423] So weirdly, there was a lot of lemonade out of this lemon.

[424] Yeah, yeah.

[425] Video store, this video radio.

[426] Yeah.

[427] Yeah.

[428] Well, it is like the type of thing of, like, I'm glad it happened.

[429] I mean, because I don't think I would have pursued this career at all.

[430] Right.

[431] Because my parents would have gone like, you're moving where?

[432] We don't know anyone out there.

[433] No. Yeah.

[434] You're going to live here and work at the railroad like every other male member of this family.

[435] Yes.

[436] I'm really glad it worked out that way because...

[437] Can you access your early Chris Farley?

[438] No, my voice changed.

[439] I mean, it's just a little bit like this, you know?

[440] Yeah, that's great.

[441] Yeah, I remember when my voice changed.

[442] Like, for whatever reason, when I had a higher pitched voice.

[443] it was better.

[444] Oh, okay.

[445] Because then when I would lower it, it still was like that high pitch, Chris Farley.

[446] Yeah, and I remember my voice changed on the radio.

[447] Oh, really?

[448] And I called in and...

[449] My voice was cracking all the time.

[450] You know, I'm in like seventh, eighth grade.

[451] And I call in and they...

[452] Like, hey, Scoob?

[453] Yeah, totally.

[454] And they were like, no, this isn't Adam.

[455] And I'm like, it is.

[456] And they're like, no, it's not.

[457] And I was so disappointed.

[458] When do you discover you can sing?

[459] Do you start singing young?

[460] Now, that was just something I could always kind of do.

[461] Like, I still don't consider myself a great singer.

[462] Okay.

[463] I think I can pull off some songs.

[464] Well, this is going to be the cynical side of me, not even regarding to you.

[465] But sometimes when I hear people sing, I think, can they just do an impersonation of a singer?

[466] Or are they really singing?

[467] You know what I'm saying?

[468] Like, when people are like, ooh, you're soulful.

[469] I'm like, I'm doing a James Brown impression.

[470] Right, right, right, you know?

[471] Because I can't sing at all, but occasionally I can hear.

[472] It Whalen Jennings, just because I'm imitating him and I will find my way into tune just by being him, but I can't do it with my own voice.

[473] It's weird.

[474] Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare.

[475] What's up, guys?

[476] It's your girl Kiki, and my podcast is back with a new season, and let me tell you, it's too good.

[477] And I'm diving into the brains of entertainment's best and brightest, okay?

[478] Every episode, I bring on a friend and have a real conversation.

[479] And I don't mean just friends, I mean the likes of Amy Poehler, Kell Mitchell, Vivica Fox, the list goes on.

[480] So follow, watch, and listen to Baby.

[481] This is Kiki Palmer on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast.

[482] We've all been there.

[483] Turning to the internet to self -diagnose our inexplicable pains, debilitating body aches, sudden fevers, and strange rashes.

[484] Though our minds tend to spiral to worst -case scenarios, it's usually nothing.

[485] But for an unlucky few, these unsuspecting symbols.

[486] symptoms can start the clock ticking on a terrifying medical mystery, like the unexplainable death of a retired firefighter, whose body was found at home by his son, except it looked like he had been cremated, or the time when an entire town started jumping from buildings and seeing tigers on their ceilings.

[487] Hey listeners, it's Mr. Ballin here, and I'm here to tell you about my podcast.

[488] It's called Mr. Ballin's Medical Mysteries.

[489] Each terrifying true story will be sure to keep you up at night.

[490] Follow Mr. Ballin's Medical Mysteries wherever you get your podcasts.

[491] Prime members can listen early and add free on Amazon Music.

[492] One of the most impressive things I learned about you was that, now I've thrown the first pitch out at a game twice.

[493] That in itself is scary as fuck.

[494] Virtually no win.

[495] Either you do it well and it's not going to make the news or you're bab -abooie it and then it's everywhere, right?

[496] There's no upside.

[497] But that alone is so stressful.

[498] And the fact you sang the National Anthem at a Dodgers game, the fucking hard pass for me Oh, that was like one of the things where I'm like, I just, I gotta see if I could do it.

[499] Because, you know, I'm gonna do it the best I can.

[500] I'm not gonna rosan it and like make a mockery of it.

[501] Like I will do my best.

[502] We'll see if that's any good.

[503] Right.

[504] I've not heard a song more in my life that I don't know the words too.

[505] Well, they're insane.

[506] They are right.

[507] They're insane.

[508] They're not real words.

[509] It's very old -timey.

[510] I think I'd just learn this year that there are other verses of that song that get downright racist?

[511] Do you know this?

[512] Oh, no?

[513] I'm thinking of a different song.

[514] I don't think you're thinking of the national anthem.

[515] I feel like there currently would be uproar about that.

[516] Well, I thought that's what was kind of brought out during the Kaepernick stuff was like, hold on, you want us to stand for this thing, got it, blah, blah, blah.

[517] But also, do you know the full song from it's the first time?

[518] Like they've cut out passages.

[519] I could be wrong.

[520] You'll fact check it.

[521] We'll find out.

[522] But I do think there's some dicey stuff maybe in the back half of that song.

[523] I didn't sing those.

[524] Yeah, I just found those verses and just sang that.

[525] We're taking this one old school.

[526] Now, do you have a trick?

[527] Do you have like some mental gymnastics you do just prior to singing that song to steady yourself?

[528] Well, my ex -girlfriend was a singer.

[529] Madonna, right?

[530] Yeah, Ariana Grande.

[531] No. She was a singer, so she kind of coached me up a little bit.

[532] Left to my own devices, I would have butchered it.

[533] Because you have to start so low Because then it builds so high If you start where you're comfortable singing You've got nowhere to go You got nowhere to go My thing is I try to be distracted Until the second I'm doing something Like when I do stand up I'm backstage, I'm talking with people I'm messing around until they call my name And then if I try to think about the material I'm about to do I can't think of a single joke I'm about to do Right If I'm looking at my set list or whatever whatever, I'll be like, none of these words make sense right before I'm about to go on, like 15 minutes before it all makes sense.

[534] But then in that moment, none of it does.

[535] And so I'm just like, I just got to think of something else, and then it'll come back to me. Now, I did stand up for a few years.

[536] Standup's a 10.

[537] For me, fear level, right before you walk out.

[538] It is just like, oh, man, there's nowhere to hide.

[539] There's no one to help me. A sink or swim.

[540] It is as highest.

[541] I think that's like what I enjoy about it.

[542] I did my special, came out on Netflix.

[543] Adam Devine, best time of our lives.

[544] And I knew that material front and back.

[545] I've been doing those jokes for a while.

[546] Like, it's really polished.

[547] I know what I'm getting myself into.

[548] I know exactly how this can go.

[549] Nothing can throw me off.

[550] Yeah.

[551] And still, even before, like on that last run of shows, right before going on, you still get the jitters and are nervous and excited to get out there.

[552] So you go to college, Orange Coast College, is that what it was?

[553] It's a community college It's in Orange County It's Costa Mesa Oh so you moved here to go there Yeah I moved when I was 18 I was going to go to UCLA But it's super expensive And so Out of state Yeah out of state And so I was going to get some credits And get in state tuition And then transfer up And then I went down there And I met Blake and Kyle Blake Anneson and Kyle Newichick that I ended up doing Workholics with Day one of improv class In community college That's cool that they had an improv class Yeah it's cool It's like, I think it's like the second largest community college in the country.

[554] Oh.

[555] There's like 50 ,000 kids that goes to school there.

[556] Oh, Jesus.

[557] So it's like Notre Dame.

[558] Yeah.

[559] And so we met and I was like, oh, this guy with like the curly hair is like super funny.

[560] He had like a tight little cute afro.

[561] Uh -huh.

[562] And I'm like, oh, he's so funny.

[563] And then Kyle was like a director and I'm like, oh, let's start making stuff together.

[564] So we did.

[565] And then.

[566] Like you did in the MySpace era, right?

[567] You were post stuff there and YouTube and Myspace.

[568] And then Kyle moved up to go to.

[569] film school at LA Film School because he couldn't get into the film school at Orange Coast Community College and so he moved up there and I moved up with him about a year later and I got a job with the Hollywood Improv working the phones and doing the door and stuff and then at that time the Second City was next door and they shared a building.

[570] And so I got half off classes and so I'm like oh I'll start to take classes at the Second City.

[571] And being from the Midwest like Second City was like a big deal.

[572] And so I started taking classes there and met Anders in improv class, and then we started making stuff.

[573] And so based on the success of your videos, is that why Comedy Central agrees to do that?

[574] It was like a mix of like I did stand up for Comedy Central.

[575] Oh, okay.

[576] Other like New Faces showcase called Live at Gotham.

[577] And so I was kind of on their radar and then I told them about us as a group and then a lower level executive just saw our stuff and kept tabs on us and then we made a web series that ended up being very similar to workaholics and they called us in.

[578] We didn't even know that they had sent us a YouTube email, like a message through our YouTube.

[579] Okay.

[580] And we never checked those.

[581] So like for like two months, it was just sitting there.

[582] Just kept going out.

[583] Fine, a million.

[584] And so they honestly thought we were like big -time in them.

[585] Yeah, which worked out in our favor.

[586] Sure, that's a good.

[587] That's a happy accident.

[588] How old are you when you started doing that show?

[589] I got the call when I was 25 and then really started to work on it when I was 26.

[590] We didn't know what we were doing.

[591] Like we literally, Anders had written a few spec scripts, but like the rest of us hadn't written any spec.

[592] We would just write sketches.

[593] Right, whatever you were going to film.

[594] But we wouldn't write, you know, spec scripts for TV.

[595] So we, like, literally were reading books on how to write for television as we were shooting the show.

[596] Right.

[597] And was that part the hardest, the writing of it?

[598] Yeah, I feel like the first season, like, we had so much pent up creative energy that it was like your first album, right?

[599] Yeah, it was like awesome.

[600] It got harder, like, season five.

[601] Oh, we've already done a thing like that.

[602] Or, like, you start to go down a road and you got stuck down that road before creatively.

[603] And you're like, so you don't even bother to.

[604] go down it anymore when maybe you should have and you probably could have figured it out but yeah it gets hard to feed that machine right with just storylines yeah I'm glad we did our seven seasons and Comedy Central wanted to take us through nine or ten oh wow yeah and we were like no we got to go we're worn we're done we're done with this two of us are dead yeah and you're talking to me in the hospital you're no longer like young guys uh that are just drinking beers on the roof.

[605] Ders, Blake, and Kyle all have children.

[606] Yeah.

[607] So you did that for seven years?

[608] It ended up being seven seasons and six years, but we worked seven years.

[609] You did.

[610] And like nine months a year?

[611] Was there any breaks on that?

[612] Yeah, there's seven or eight months of the year.

[613] Uh -huh.

[614] And then towards the end, like, I was leaving to go do movies, so I would, like, come back in the writer's room for, like, three weeks, and then I'd have to leave and to go do X, Y, Did they present you for that, or were they happy for you?

[615] Yeah, I think they hate my guts.

[616] I'm meeting with them tonight, so I'll ask them.

[617] Yeah, I think for the most part, they're happy.

[618] I'm sure they were like, oh, why the fuck are we in this room in Van Nuys where our office was when Adam is in glorious Baton Rouge, Louisiana?

[619] Right, staying at a very nice place.

[620] Pitch Perfect's kind of like the first big, is that the first?

[621] Yeah, I shot that between season one.

[622] and two.

[623] Oh, so early.

[624] Yeah, real early.

[625] And we had actually just finished shooting season two, but season one had already been out.

[626] And season two was starting to come out while I was down there.

[627] And so it was pretty crazy.

[628] It was crazy, like being in a college town when that show's coming out.

[629] What type of person are you?

[630] How are you handling being on TV?

[631] How are you, is your ego running away with you?

[632] Do you think you're like six months away from being Sandler?

[633] What kind of...

[634] Yeah, I definitely never thought about, like, dips in the road.

[635] I am on a goddamn rocket ship.

[636] I had a similar experience.

[637] Yeah.

[638] But I think for the most part, you know, I was, like, always nice to people and everything like that.

[639] By the way, regardless of what you say, the proof is in the pudding because basically when people have dips and they stick around, that's basically how you know someone's fun to work with.

[640] Yeah.

[641] Because the guys who take it on the chin and they were assholes, they're gone.

[642] No, I absolutely think that.

[643] And it's like, I also know how many talented people are out there.

[644] Like, I worked at the improv for years before getting any sort of shot.

[645] And so I saw all these, like, super funny guys and I saw how, like, people would get a big head and come in, and then, like, six months later, it's not working that well for them.

[646] Or they get a show, and now they think they're the hot shit, and then that show ends up getting canceled and coming back into the club on a Tuesday, with their tail between their legs.

[647] And so I, like, I had seen enough of that to not fully be a maniac.

[648] I always have to look at it, like, when I was a kid, if I told myself when I was, like, 15 or 16 years old, when I was first starting to truly dream about, like, this life, if I told myself that I got as successful as I currently am, I would be so stoked.

[649] On the moon.

[650] Couldn't agree more.

[651] You always have to look at it.

[652] Like, of course, everything could be better, but it's still pretty great.

[653] Yeah, my analogy is always not.

[654] You're in the NBA.

[655] I'm not Michael Jordan, but by God, I've been playing in the NBA for a while.

[656] I don't want to miss that because I was, wasn't Jordan.

[657] Exactly.

[658] Okay, so pitch perfect, though, is a giant.

[659] I'm Bill Cartwright.

[660] Yeah, I'm just there, getting the boards, boxing people out.

[661] I think I'm Robert Orie.

[662] I'm Robert Orie.

[663] He's a good time.

[664] Sometimes he's great.

[665] Sometimes he's a lot.

[666] Sometimes clutch.

[667] Sometimes not paying attention.

[668] Yeah.

[669] But pitch perfect is a fucking matter.

[670] massive hit, right?

[671] I don't, I've never been in a movie that was that successful.

[672] Yeah, it was crazy because I didn't know, like, what I was getting myself into.

[673] I literally didn't read the sides before going to the audition.

[674] I just read Pitch Perfect.

[675] I thought it was a baseball movie, and that's not a joke.

[676] Like, I thought it was a baseball movie.

[677] I feel like there is a Matthew Lillard baseball movie called maybe Pitch Perfect with Freddie Prince Jr. That would make sense.

[678] Yeah, I think, or something very close to that.

[679] No, it's not pitch perfect, but there is one.

[680] I'm joking like I don't know.

[681] It's perfect pitch and it's my favorite film.

[682] Yeah, so I remember when I got the script and I went and did the audition, it went really well, and they offered me the role.

[683] And my age is like, you're doing it.

[684] You can't say no, but I was like waffling on the idea because I'm on like workaholics, which is a cool, culty.

[685] You have street credit at the moment, comedic street credit.

[686] Yeah, and it's like, I don't know if doing a, song and dance movie is the right move and i gave it to my guys and and and anders read it and was like this is funny i think you're going to be really funny in this the movie sucks it won't be on you but you will be funny right and then blake was like uh -huh yeah and then we were working late and he comes into my office he's like you can't do it dude oh oh no yeah and he's like you'll tear down everything we're building and i'm like and so i have like this to wait on my shoulders where Blake thinks I'm going to, like, ruin our collective careers.

[687] Yes.

[688] But I'm selfish, and I took it.

[689] Yeah, and I like money.

[690] At this point, do you care about money?

[691] Yeah, well, I mean, the crazy thing is, is, like, everyone's like, oh, Comedy Central, not making any money, but, like, I was making zero money.

[692] Right.

[693] I was just doing, like, commercials and stuff.

[694] So, like, to go from, like, making nothing to making the...

[695] Hundreds of thousands.

[696] Yeah, where I have tens of thousands in the bank account.

[697] I'm like, oh, this is okay.

[698] Fuck, yeah.

[699] And then, you know, like, I always relate it to back to my parents and I tell them what I'm making to, like, say that that's not a lot of money is my dad would punch me in the nose.

[700] Yeah, yeah, you know?

[701] He put you on a railroad track and drive over you in a train.

[702] Yeah.

[703] For sure.

[704] It was also awesome because all of my best friends, like, we all lived in the workaholics house together, all this except for Durs.

[705] Oh, Ders, like, had a girlfriend that he's now married to and has two children with.

[706] but like me, Kyle and Blake all lived together in that house.

[707] Hold on a second.

[708] You lived in the house you shot in?

[709] We shot in, yeah.

[710] So when you just wake up and you're at work.

[711] Yeah, for the first season.

[712] And then Blake and I went and rented a big dumb house in the hills.

[713] But we're like, we got to be bachelors.

[714] There was like a sunken in fire pit with like shag carpet and leather walls.

[715] Oh, wow.

[716] You really leaned into it.

[717] I hope we made love in front of that fire at least once.

[718] At least once.

[719] Okay, good.

[720] Me and Blake.

[721] Yeah, so it was fun, like, making money, like, together.

[722] Yeah.

[723] And so, like, we each went out and, like, bought a car on the same day.

[724] That's fine.

[725] And we're all, like, tomorrow we're all going to come in with a new car.

[726] We all pulled in and we're, like, showing off our cars.

[727] Like, you're an entourage.

[728] Yeah, totally.

[729] So Pitch Perfect comes out.

[730] It's an enormous hit.

[731] I mean, a really, really big hit.

[732] And then there's a sequel.

[733] And then you do that how long after that?

[734] A year after maybe?

[735] Year, year and a half, something like that.

[736] And then did that.

[737] And then it was really clicking because I was doing workaholics.

[738] I had my own stand -up show called Adam Devine's House Party that I was able to curate and get the new talent.

[739] It was sort of their live at Gotham.

[740] It was their new or their premium blend.

[741] Yeah.

[742] And I was able to bring up a bunch of funny young comics that I knew from working at the improv.

[743] Right.

[744] And at the same time, I was doing it.

[745] that i was doing workaholics pitch perfect was out i'd just done pitch perfect too and then i started going on tour a lot and was doing like big theater tours right now is mike and dave need wedding dates is that your first opportunity to to headline a movie yeah and you're with zach effron you're like this motherfucker can't not make money right i'm like he's printing it let me latch on But I would imagine you'd feel pretty safeguarded by that whole combination.

[746] The whole like independent movies, you never know if people are going to see it or if it's going to come out in the theaters or where it's going to land.

[747] But I felt good going into this.

[748] Pitch Perfect 2 was coming out while we just got to Hawaii to shoot Mike and Day.

[749] Right.

[750] I felt just on the moon.

[751] I'm in Hawaii.

[752] Oh, yeah.

[753] I like got abs to look like.

[754] Dachephron's brother.

[755] Yeah.

[756] But like the protruding abs, the fat guy abs.

[757] The Harvey Kytel.

[758] The Harvey Kytel abs.

[759] Yeah.

[760] Yeah, so I was on the moon.

[761] What do you get the fuck.

[762] Oh my.

[763] Rob, we got to get a picture of this.

[764] I don't even know why I pulled this out.

[765] We each have a pack of Justin's almond butter in our pockets.

[766] Honestly, that is impossible that that just happened.

[767] What two guys in L .A. right now are walking around the fucking pack at a home.

[768] Apparently, many, many of them.

[769] Is this the moment, should we buy a fucking Justin's stock?

[770] Do we just discover everyone's eating it?

[771] I love this stuff.

[772] Let's call our guys together on the air, or business managers.

[773] Mine's too hot.

[774] It's too liquid.

[775] No, I'm kind of, that's why I pull it out.

[776] Yeah, mine's at about 140 degrees right now.

[777] I've got a hot, hot thigh.

[778] For our misophonia listeners, prepare your.

[779] I can't get over that.

[780] I thought he was pulling out some nicotine or something.

[781] I thought he were pulling out your phone, but much better.

[782] Just bored.

[783] Yeah.

[784] I got to call my family.

[785] I got to wake up right now.

[786] I want to talk to my grandmother.

[787] She's hanging on by a thread.

[788] Oh.

[789] Mm. Wow.

[790] What a thing to share.

[791] Now, peanut butter is such a good thing to eat while on a microphone.

[792] Yeah.

[793] Yeah.

[794] We have a lot of listeners who have misophonia, which is an irrational.

[795] Well, that irrational is medical.

[796] Okay, okay, sure.

[797] Well, they don't think it's irrational.

[798] Hatred of mouth sounds.

[799] You know, it kind of makes me like Alan Wilson and all the gates.

[800] Oh, yeah.

[801] I see that.

[802] You know, the whole of the nails with a bomb gets such a great kitchen.

[803] Is yours peanut butter or almond?

[804] Mine's almond butter.

[805] Mine's almond butter.

[806] Mine's honey.

[807] Are you saying what you?

[808] Honey.

[809] Is yours regular or is it honey?

[810] You're going to love this.

[811] I started the day with three of these in my pocket.

[812] I've already gone through two of them.

[813] One of them was honey and then two non -honey.

[814] That was how I treated myself.

[815] But I didn't want to go all three honeies.

[816] How about yours?

[817] I love the honey.

[818] Okay, back to Hawaii.

[819] Because now, man, this is when I want to be you.

[820] I'm imagining you've got a fucking sweet hotel room wherever you're shooting.

[821] Did you have any fire in your hotel room?

[822] And I'm being serious.

[823] Like, were there any torches or anything?

[824] Because that's, I'm in my mind right now when I'm fantasizing about you being number one on the call sheet and having a fucking, a pimp place to, was there like exposed fire anywhere?

[825] No, no, it was just like a giant suite.

[826] It was nice.

[827] It was very nice.

[828] I just started dating my girlfriend, or maybe we'd been dating a little bit.

[829] But it was awesome.

[830] It was like where we like really fell in love with each other.

[831] She came down.

[832] She came down.

[833] And because it was such a fun place to come visit.

[834] Yeah.

[835] And she'd come down for a few weeks at a time and we became friends, like the whole cast and her all became friends together.

[836] Right.

[837] Are you a big drinker?

[838] Mm -hmm.

[839] Yeah, you like it.

[840] I do.

[841] Yeah.

[842] So on those sets, you can really have a good time, can't you?

[843] Yeah.

[844] What was great is we did, it was so fun.

[845] It was like just ran the whole hotel.

[846] Like there was like multiple bars and like we could go in whenever.

[847] And there was like the beach bars.

[848] They were so cool to us They were so great to us that I was trying to think of where to take my house party show Because season one I did it in LA Season two I did it Took over a bar in New Orleans And season three I took it to the North Shore, Hawaii And took over a surfer the bar Oh wow Yeah Man so now let me just ask you Some mornings on that movie A little rough Or could you rain it in on the week On the school days?

[849] Yeah On the school days, I'm pretty good about rain in the name.

[850] Like six drinks after work, but cap it there.

[851] Yeah.

[852] That's great.

[853] I'd say that's probably about the number.

[854] By the way, that's what I want.

[855] Like, some alcoholics, they desire to be able to have a glass of wine.

[856] I'm like, I don't want that.

[857] I want to be able to get drunk.

[858] I want six.

[859] That would be a sweet spot for me. If I just, like, I could get drunk.

[860] I'd say, like, four to six is when, because that's the tipping point that you're drunk.

[861] And then you go, like, Maybe let's just, I'll be fine.

[862] If I get five hours of sleep, I'll be fine.

[863] That fucking conversation where you keep building an argument for why you only need five and four.

[864] And then you're like, I'm fucked.

[865] Then it goes straight to you.

[866] You can't even make an argument anymore.

[867] And you're like, oh, no, what did I do?

[868] Oh, boy.

[869] Okay, so you do that movie.

[870] It comes out.

[871] It does fine, right?

[872] It just does fine.

[873] You probably had higher expectations.

[874] I wanted it to be a huge hit.

[875] I feel like if that movie was four or five years earlier, it would have done much better and...

[876] It was really right at the beginning where just comedies start, slowly the air starts coming out of them at the movie theater.

[877] But of course, you don't know, A, you don't know that then.

[878] What's crazy is if that movie were to come out right now and make the money that it did, people would be like, no, okay.

[879] Yeah, big win.

[880] All right, comedy's back.

[881] Yep.

[882] Because it made like 17 or 18 million opening weekend.

[883] Mm -hmm.

[884] Which is like...

[885] Now would be a...

[886] would be great because movies are coming out and making like six.

[887] Yeah, oh, yeah.

[888] Yeah, I've had a couple of them.

[889] Yeah, so it sucks.

[890] Yeah.

[891] But anything shy of this at that time, like you had to hit 20.

[892] 20 was like you've made a hit comedy at that time.

[893] And so you didn't hit that.

[894] And how do you take that?

[895] I mean, you luckily have the show still, right, at that point?

[896] Yeah.

[897] That's helpful, I would imagine.

[898] I had the show and I knew that that wasn't going to be my only shot.

[899] Like, I feel like it wasn't like my.

[900] soul thing, so I knew that I was going to at least have some other shots.

[901] Right.

[902] So you were fine with it.

[903] Yeah, I mean, I did.

[904] I definitely wanted it to be bigger.

[905] I wanted, you know, like we were saying about you're building things up in your head and you're sort of planning the trajectory of where your career could go.

[906] Yep.

[907] As I'm like, oh, this movie's going to come out.

[908] I'm on the cover of Rolling Stone.

[909] Uh -huh.

[910] I'm the biggest movie star in the world.

[911] and I sell out arenas.

[912] Like, that's where I'm dreaming that it goes.

[913] I mean, I had friends that, like, didn't go see it opening weekend and, like, family members that, like, didn't go opening weekend.

[914] Yes.

[915] And I'm like, just go the opening weekend.

[916] Oh, I had one, I was talking to my dad on, like, a Monday, and he goes, oh, yeah, and it was just a fucking terrible movie.

[917] I can't remember what it was, but some movie no one should go see.

[918] Like, you know, Luke Bassan's worst movie or something.

[919] he's like yeah he's a boy that i saw so good movie and i go yeah yeah is that what you saw this weekend i had a movie come out he actually went to the movie theater they didn't see my movie movie so fucking oh that is so funny some punch him up kick him up film with some older man in it yeah that was that was something stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare Okay, I want to go to The Righteous Gemstones because we've watched the first six episodes.

[920] Oh, cool.

[921] Oh, man. Wow.

[922] The music's so fucking great.

[923] The scope of it's so big.

[924] Like, Danny directed the fuck out of that thing.

[925] It is so good.

[926] Monica and I are.

[927] Yeah, we do not say this lightly.

[928] We are obsessed.

[929] Yeah.

[930] Oh, cool.

[931] Thanks, guys.

[932] Yeah, it is unbelievable.

[933] I mean, that was like, I watched Footfist Way with my girlfriend last night.

[934] Oh, really?

[935] For the first time?

[936] No, it was like my eighth time, but she had never seen it before.

[937] And she's like, this is so funny.

[938] Oh.

[939] And then her next sentence was, this movie would never get made today.

[940] And I'm like, yeah, you're right.

[941] It absolutely wouldn't.

[942] But Danny was just such a hero to me. I put him on the pedestal with like Will Ferrell and like, oh, yeah.

[943] He was like a god.

[944] And I remember I met him at a party.

[945] We had a small bit in neighbors, the first neighbors.

[946] We were the guys that invented beer pong.

[947] Uh -huh.

[948] and me and the work colleagues guys.

[949] And so we were at the after party, and everybody's there.

[950] And I'm like, oh, it's cool.

[951] Like, look, all these guys from the movies that we know.

[952] Danny comes around and grabs my mother's shoulders like, oh, hey, I know you.

[953] And I'm like, holy shit, you're Danny McBride.

[954] And he goes, yeah.

[955] And I go, you're a bright shooting star.

[956] What?

[957] You're a bright shooting star, is what I said.

[958] Wow.

[959] I think I was a little fucked up, honestly.

[960] Sure.

[961] I hope so.

[962] It's a beautiful thing to be described as them.

[963] Yeah.

[964] And he goes, okay, man. That's a hard compliment to take.

[965] Yeah, and then I just grab my girlfriend.

[966] I'm like, we've got to get out of here.

[967] I just called a bright shooting star.

[968] We have to leave right now.

[969] So how did you, first of all, not only is the show just a 10 on all levels.

[970] The fact that it's serialized and genuinely serialized and I really want to know what happens next, I love.

[971] And then you are spectacular on it.

[972] You are really.

[973] Really, really fucking perfect in it.

[974] So good.

[975] So good.

[976] Yeah, thanks.

[977] You are holding your own with him in every way, and you're so funny.

[978] I'm dying to know.

[979] I mean, clearly I think you're gay, but maybe there's another layer going on that I don't even understand yet.

[980] The guy, who is the fucking guy who's in love with you?

[981] Tony Cavalero.

[982] Okay, that is one of the greatest, maybe I'm just out to lunch on him.

[983] I must be, but what a casting choice.

[984] Yeah, he's so great.

[985] he was like on School of Rock like the Nickelodeon he played like the Jack Black character in school of rock okay he was a groundlings guy and so he's like being in that world I should know him yeah yeah I'm embarrassed but he's super funny I'm like is this a real person I love when I think oh maybe Danny knew this guy at a convenience store and he somehow convinced him to act you know one of those is like he looks insane his hair his haircuts insane and then he's like a buddy he's like the guy that I do most of my scenes with so like I'm buddies with him when we were shooting the show we lived like a few blocks away from each other so we'd like grab lunch or like yeah we would like work out together like I bought weights and like we'd work out of my backyard oh I love it was hard to like scrub off his satanic tattoos oh because they're like they just like stick to you yeah yeah it's like hard to get them off all the time so half the time they're just faded looking and so like I remember we're working out in the backyard and he's not wearing a shirt and I'm like you look absolutely insane right now You were covered in like six, six, six across your chest, upside down, crosses.

[986] Oh, man. And he's like the sweetest, nicest guy.

[987] Yeah, he is blowing my mind in that show.

[988] Wait, there was one, because we asked Danny, but he didn't know.

[989] There's one scene, are you guys in the bathroom or something?

[990] And you say, have you lost your marbles?

[991] You said marbles in the craziest, craziest way.

[992] Marbles.

[993] Was that just a fuck up, or was that on purpose?

[994] We were laughing so hard.

[995] you know what it was is Marbles wasn't written and me and Danny we don't get to improv a lot in this show because a lot of it there's eight people in the scene or you have to really push the story forward but this time it's just me and Danny so he was like let's let it fly and so we were improv in a lot and I went to say I'm supposed to say mind but I did that in another take and so I start to say mind and I switched it to to marbles.

[996] Got it.

[997] Yeah, it was too good.

[998] My estimation was that was real.

[999] Like, he switched midword, and I'm so glad that's what they put in there.

[1000] I love one.

[1001] We tried to do a lot of that on workaholics, too.

[1002] Like, when people fuck up saying something, especially if they're angry, which people do all the time when they're just speaking.

[1003] I also had one in Pitch Perfect, where I said, instead of saying orchard, I said orchid.

[1004] and they left it in i'm like of course every time i fuck up they just leave it in oh it's so good and you were down in charleston is that yeah yeah did you dig it down there you tempted to move down i love it so i would love to get a place on there my girlfriend's like no you're not my house down there but it's it's awesome it's like the people there are so great the food's awesome yeah i like gained 20 pounds when i was down there that's why that's what we were talking about working out so much in the beginning because I'm like, I got to get this off me. Now, how did you come to be in that show?

[1005] Were you offered it?

[1006] Does Danny love you?

[1007] Did you have to earn it?

[1008] Yeah, they offered it to me, which is really, really cool.

[1009] Yeah.

[1010] I would have auditioned, but they just wanted to meet me. The only time we met, I called him a bright shooting star.

[1011] Right.

[1012] I was like, well, maybe we meet him so we know he's not a psychopath.

[1013] They wanted me to go to Charleston, so I went to Charleston to meet them, and I walk into a restaurant, and Danny jumps out behind a pot of plant and goes boo scared you fucker and i'm like yep i'm in classic mcbride yeah and then we just talked david gordon green was there a bunch of the writers so we just had like a dinner together right how much of the character did you create how much did you work with danny with it on what was that danny's so cool like he's great about casting people that he's confident in their abilities right So, like, no real do it this way or do it that way.

[1014] Like, he really was just like, I love it.

[1015] Yeah, do it.

[1016] Right.

[1017] How about the hairdo?

[1018] That Danny wanted.

[1019] Danny, like, wanted that hair.

[1020] It's a great, great look.

[1021] It's a, I think it's making me go bald, though.

[1022] Oh, they have to hot iron my hair to make it.

[1023] It's like a footh where they spike it straight up.

[1024] They have to hot iron it every time.

[1025] Oh, yeah, that's killing your hair for sure.

[1026] Yeah, I'm like.

[1027] You can, well, I've had that done, and I'm like, I smell my hair burning.

[1028] Yeah, I can smell it.

[1029] Thinner right here than the hour.

[1030] And I'm like never like lost my hair before.

[1031] Right.

[1032] And I'm like 35 and I'm like, is this how it goes?

[1033] Do I lose it on the right?

[1034] Adult diapers are next.

[1035] They're coming up.

[1036] 60 % of men under 35 are losing for hymns .com.

[1037] Yeah, okay, we'll hook it up.

[1038] Yeah, we'll get you some.

[1039] We'll get you some.

[1040] We'll get to the promo code dax.

[1041] That's right.

[1042] How many episodes are there in their first season?

[1043] Nine.

[1044] Oh, wonderful.

[1045] So we have three.

[1046] more left.

[1047] So you're definitely doing that.

[1048] And what else are you up to?

[1049] I got a bunch of stuff coming out.

[1050] I got a movie that I did.

[1051] It's if Siri like were to turn on you.

[1052] And it's got all these bugs in it and it like falls in love with me. And it's, and I start to, I get a girlfriend and like tries to sabotage my life.

[1053] So it's like the reverse of her.

[1054] Exactly.

[1055] Yeah.

[1056] It's like comedy her.

[1057] Uh -huh.

[1058] So I got that coming out.

[1059] What's that called?

[1060] Comedy Her.

[1061] It's called Comedy Her.

[1062] It's called Comedy Her.

[1063] It's It's Jexie.

[1064] It sounds a lot like...

[1065] A comedy hurt.

[1066] And then I'm doing Green Eggs and Ham for Netflix.

[1067] And that's a big cartoon that I'm doing.

[1068] And you play Sam I Am?

[1069] I play Sam I Am, yeah.

[1070] Right.

[1071] That's pretty fun.

[1072] Do you have a voice that you do when you're Sam I Am?

[1073] I mean, it's just my voice, but it's up here.

[1074] Right.

[1075] Yeah, and he's just really excited.

[1076] Okay, so I'm horrendous at voiceover.

[1077] Oh, really?

[1078] Embarrassingly bad, yeah.

[1079] And I live with someone who's one of the best in the world.

[1080] Sure.

[1081] And I just can't.

[1082] do it I've had these were you in Ice Age I was on Ice Age yeah okay so when I first kind of like got known for anything the casting director was like we want you in Ice Age like it was mine to lose I'm telling you like they were like you can't I'm like I'm nervous you can't fuck up you're in this thing and then I went and record and they're like this is not gonna go work out and I just can't do it I had a whole movie that I mean I think I'm pretty good at voiceover and I've done a lot of it but I did a whole movie where I'm the lead of it.

[1083] It's called Ferdinand the Bull.

[1084] I do it for a year and a half.

[1085] I keep going in and doing these recording sessions.

[1086] They fired my ass and brought in John Sina.

[1087] Because John Sina's career got hot right at that point and they were like, ah, he'd make a better Ferdinand the Bull.

[1088] But I'm like, it's our voices.

[1089] It's not our what we look like.

[1090] Yeah.

[1091] Also, have you seen my six -pack on top of my beer belly?

[1092] I'm a baby Ferdinand.

[1093] Yeah, so I know, how did you take that?

[1094] How did that feel?

[1095] That sucked.

[1096] I've never been fired from anything, and, like, I'm not causing any trouble, and I think I do good work, and I'm prepared, and, yeah, it sucked.

[1097] I got fired for the first time last year, and it was quite a, you know, I had to work through it mentally.

[1098] Also, it was like, it was going to be the next thing after Mike and Dave, and I'm going to be the lead of it.

[1099] It's going to be Ferdinand the Bull.

[1100] Adam Devine is Ferdinand the Bull.

[1101] Yes.

[1102] And I'm like, that's cool.

[1103] Like, I'm a cartoon, I'm the lead guy in a cartoon.

[1104] This is my Shrek, and I'm Mike Myers, is what I'm thinking.

[1105] Of course.

[1106] It was a much different movie.

[1107] It was like, it was just really, really saccharin.

[1108] It was so sweet.

[1109] And my voice has like a raspiness to it.

[1110] Sure.

[1111] And it has a little bit of an edge to it.

[1112] So it's hard for me to just be nothing but sweet the whole time.

[1113] You might have been miscast out of the gates, which is not really your fault.

[1114] And I think it was like an uphill battle.

[1115] I don't think I was like, the director's first choice.

[1116] And so I think the whole time, he was like, if only we could get seen it.

[1117] Sino would be fucking crushing this shit right now.

[1118] It's the sweetest voice I've ever heard.

[1119] Have you heard Sina's voice?

[1120] So, silkenny -dew coming off of a baby's gym.

[1121] Okay, so, Oxy, you have more movies coming out.

[1122] And then what's next?

[1123] And then I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do there.

[1124] Well, no, you have two movies coming out, don't you?

[1125] You finish.

[1126] You're in post on two films, aren't you?

[1127] Oh, that one's, uh, Magic Camp.

[1128] Weirdly, I did this movie for Disney, right?

[1129] Like, literally I finished workaholics.

[1130] We wrapped.

[1131] We had the rap party.

[1132] And then that next Monday I started work on this Disney movie.

[1133] So this is a few years ago now.

[1134] It's still not out.

[1135] Okay.

[1136] And it's me, it's like a classic Disney, like Kurt Russell movie when he was a kid.

[1137] And it's like all these kids at a camp.

[1138] And I'm the camp counselor who doesn't want to be there and then ends up, you know, fall in love with the kids.

[1139] Yeah.

[1140] And it's like a magic camp.

[1141] I'm like this world -class magician who's falling hard on his luck.

[1142] And it's fun.

[1143] It was cute and I really liked doing it.

[1144] I like doing like those kids movies.

[1145] But these kids are fully grown now.

[1146] They're going to be promoting the movie on motorcycles.

[1147] Yeah.

[1148] I mean, they're like, they were like all like 12 and 13.

[1149] Yeah.

[1150] And now they're like 16 years old.

[1151] You know, 14, 15, 16.

[1152] And I'm like, it's going to be a much day.

[1153] I'm like, they can't do a red carpet.

[1154] Right.

[1155] They can't.

[1156] Yeah.

[1157] It'd be really confusing.

[1158] Yeah.

[1159] Did you learn any magic on that movie?

[1160] I learned some, like, slide of hand stuff that, like, immediately I forgot.

[1161] I was, like, for sure, this is going to stick with me, and I'm always going to have this card trick.

[1162] I even went to the improv because I wanted to test it out to see if I could do it in front of a crowd.

[1163] I did it in front of this crowd.

[1164] It worked.

[1165] And Chris Rock came in and was in the audience.

[1166] He's my favorite comic of all the time.

[1167] I love the guy.

[1168] And he follows me, and I'm like, oh, God.

[1169] Chris Rock's here, and so I go out to the bar, and I leave in like 15 minutes.

[1170] He just does a quick set and comes out, and he goes, magic man. And I'm like, I'm not the magic man. I do a bunch of other stuff.

[1171] This is weirdly...

[1172] I never have done magic before.

[1173] I'm a stand -up comedian.

[1174] I'm an actor.

[1175] Prepare it for a role.

[1176] Yeah, I've been around one person where I was like, I'm just not going to do it.

[1177] The door's open.

[1178] I could do it, but I just...

[1179] And that's Bill Murray.

[1180] I'm like, I need him to like me in a way that I can't risk finding out.

[1181] Of course, he doesn't.

[1182] It just, it's better to not know, I guess.

[1183] Yeah.

[1184] Yeah, did you meet him down in Charleston?

[1185] No, never met him.

[1186] I live down there, right?

[1187] Yeah, yeah, he has a place down there.

[1188] I think he lives just in the world.

[1189] He does, he kind of just wanders from party to party.

[1190] And I guess he was there for like a week when we were down there.

[1191] We stayed on this island, Sullivan's Island, which is right off Charleston.

[1192] And that's where, like, we all just rented houses.

[1193] and it was awesome.

[1194] We were all like right by the beach and it was so fun.

[1195] But that's where Bill has a place.

[1196] And so like there was only like six restaurants on the island.

[1197] So you end up knowing all the servers and bartenders and everyone and you'd go in and they're like, oh, do you see Bill?

[1198] He was just in.

[1199] And I'm like, where's Bill?

[1200] Uh -huh.

[1201] Okay, so quickly, Chloe.

[1202] Yep.

[1203] Are we going to have some children?

[1204] She's pregnant.

[1205] Oh, my God.

[1206] Oh, my God.

[1207] Really?

[1208] No, no, no, no. No. I mean, maybe, yeah.

[1209] Do you want them?

[1210] Yeah, I'd like kids.

[1211] I kind of am a children pusher.

[1212] People get mad at me. You like, how many kids you got?

[1213] Two, you like them?

[1214] I love them.

[1215] They're so fun.

[1216] They're so fun.

[1217] When I have defined myself as an actor, a comedian, or a writer, all these things, there was something about it that felt a little shaky.

[1218] Sure.

[1219] Like, well, ultimately someone has to agree with me that I'm this thing or I'm not this thing.

[1220] Something about having an identity that is a true one of bedrock, of I'm these people's dad, and that's my sole purpose, has been incredibly liberating on all things professional.

[1221] I'm like, everything, whatever.

[1222] It makes things matter less.

[1223] So you walk into meetings or auditions or whatever, and it's less of a thing.

[1224] I got fired from that sitcom, and then I walked in the house and my girls were right there, and I was like, oh, who gives a flying fuck?

[1225] They don't care if I'm hired or fired from the sitcom.

[1226] Who cares?

[1227] And it just immediately, yeah, I feel wonderful.

[1228] about it.

[1229] Yeah.

[1230] Yeah, I really recommend it.

[1231] I think I've had friends that have like loved being a parent out the gate and then I've had some friends that like the first year or so, especially they were like working so much and the mom was at home quite a bit and so they just like truly loved the mom more.

[1232] Yeah.

[1233] They're like, but then once the kids get a little older and you can talk to them, they're not just a baby who wants their mother.

[1234] Right.

[1235] So.

[1236] Well, luckily neither of us.

[1237] our home ever so they like us equally in our absence yeah that's good okay well you know adam here is lovely in person as you are on the television shows we've come to love you on you're funny you're um you've got a six -pack on the outside which i love you're bright shooting star oh oh go ahead and say that all right well i adore you and uh i can't wait for everyone to watch righteous gemstones it's so great you're so great on it and uh i hope you guys do that show for six years yeah need to it'd be so fun Yeah.

[1238] Yeah, maybe you guys put me on it.

[1239] Me too.

[1240] Yeah, maybe we're all open for her.

[1241] Kristen and I were literally immediately like, we have to pitch ourselves as like at Tammy and whatever, why not.

[1242] I forget the name, Tammy Fay Baker and whatever Baker.

[1243] Yeah.

[1244] And come into some kind of rival, like couple.

[1245] I could see you guys being like a super, a super Christian power couple.

[1246] Yeah, like coming up from Texas to fuck shit up.

[1247] Uh -huh.

[1248] All right, well, it's out in the ether now.

[1249] It's out there, Danny.

[1250] All right, be good.

[1251] Cool.

[1252] And now my favorite part of the show, the fact check with my soulmate Monica Padman.

[1253] Rolling.

[1254] Rolling.

[1255] Rolling down the river.

[1256] Monica's in a hurry.

[1257] And there's nothing more fun than to pick at her by making everything slow.

[1258] Okay.

[1259] I'm not in a hurry.

[1260] Oh, who's in a hurry?

[1261] You?

[1262] Oh, I'm in a hurry.

[1263] What, I got to pick up my daughter at six o 'clock?

[1264] Yeah.

[1265] Okay, I'll do it.

[1266] I'm going to poke this little bear.

[1267] Those little bear's small, but boy, she's tenacious, this little bear.

[1268] She'll tear you bits from bits.

[1269] Brown bear.

[1270] She'll tear your limb from little.

[1271] Brown bear are the meanest bears.

[1272] They are.

[1273] They're the biggest, the biggest, well, I think polar bears might be a little meaner.

[1274] Really?

[1275] Well, they're exclusively eating protein meat.

[1276] You know what I'm saying?

[1277] I thought brown bears were small but mighty.

[1278] No, black bears are the smallest.

[1279] Oh, and then brown bears are the heaviest, and then polar bears are the Paulist.

[1280] Okay, this is falling apart.

[1281] Your theory.

[1282] Yes, because I...

[1283] You're a brown bear.

[1284] But then I'm not, I'm not the biggest.

[1285] No, no, you're like a teen brown bear.

[1286] The teens are smaller?

[1287] Well, of course, before they get to full adulthood.

[1288] Well, I knew some teens who were huge, so there.

[1289] I was a huge teen.

[1290] I'm trying to think if I have any updates.

[1291] Well, we had Taco Bell today.

[1292] I know.

[1293] Second time in five days.

[1294] Second time in five days.

[1295] Yeah, we said we were going to talk about it last fact check, but we didn't have time.

[1296] Oh, right.

[1297] So we had...

[1298] Let's be dead honest with people.

[1299] This is pretty embarrassing.

[1300] As far as being opulent, we had a $50 Taco Bell order delivery.

[1301] I know.

[1302] But why was it?

[1303] Because I ordered everything.

[1304] And things that you were on the fence about, I just ordered anyways for you.

[1305] Yeah.

[1306] We had so many Taco Supremes.

[1307] This is not a commercial, by the way.

[1308] I'm making this very clear.

[1309] We are in no way receiving any money.

[1310] No. In fact, we're giving these guys money $50 to the tune of $50.

[1311] You know what's funny is, so Bell is in Europe, Galavant around Europe.

[1312] We share a food order account.

[1313] Yeah, I know.

[1314] I knew she was going to have something to say about that.

[1315] She hasn't yet, but she at some point will see that I spent $50 at Taco Bell.

[1316] And this is kind of a pattern when she goes out of town.

[1317] Remember, I also spent like $30 at McDonald's one night.

[1318] And she said, who did you have over to have McDonald's?

[1319] And I said, huh, nobody.

[1320] She goes, you had two Big Mac meals and a 20 piece chicken nugget.

[1321] Yikes.

[1322] And I was like, I did.

[1323] If I'm going to do it, I'm going all the way.

[1324] In this case, we both had Taco Bell.

[1325] We both had Taco Bell.

[1326] Yeah.

[1327] And I introduced you to the Mexican pizza.

[1328] Yep.

[1329] Which blew our socks off night one.

[1330] Today it didn't.

[1331] Today it didn't.

[1332] But I don't want to say that it's not nice.

[1333] Right.

[1334] So.

[1335] But that cheesy gourdi to crunch.

[1336] We didn't like that the first time.

[1337] But then you loved it today.

[1338] Yeah.

[1339] That makes it fun.

[1340] There's novelty.

[1341] Like you don't know what will be the best today.

[1342] Well, really what happened with the cheesy gordita crunch is I got that.

[1343] And I was like, okay, I'm not, it's fine.

[1344] I'm not crazy about that.

[1345] Then I put it down.

[1346] Then I started eating something else.

[1347] And then I was like, I'll just have one.

[1348] And I just kept having more bites of it.

[1349] Right.

[1350] Even though I didn't really want it.

[1351] I wanted it.

[1352] So interesting.

[1353] Yeah.

[1354] I went crazy and I had the Mexican pizza.

[1355] And I think I had five or six hard taco Supremes.

[1356] I had many of them were Dorito flavor.

[1357] I mean, boy, did I feel good the next day.

[1358] We had completely different reactions to it.

[1359] We did.

[1360] We did.

[1361] Bodily reactions.

[1362] I don't want to gross anyone out, but I'll just use, I'm just going to use the adjective torrential.

[1363] I'm just going to put that on the table.

[1364] And I won't say who or what, but just torrential.

[1365] And I did not have anything torrential.

[1366] Well, hold on.

[1367] Now you're exposing who had torrential issues.

[1368] Oh, well, that part I'm happy to expose.

[1369] You had a torrential issue.

[1370] I did not.

[1371] I had a great time.

[1372] Yeah, you did fine.

[1373] I had a great time eliminating that food from my body.

[1374] Evacuating.

[1375] No?

[1376] Either.

[1377] Okay.

[1378] And in fact, there was no smell.

[1379] Oh, right.

[1380] I have a theory.

[1381] You have a weird theory.

[1382] I want you to launch it on everyone.

[1383] Well, first of all, a fun thing to call Taco Bell is Taco Smell.

[1384] Right.

[1385] But we're talking about the good smell, the smell of the sauces.

[1386] Yeah.

[1387] It smells delicious.

[1388] Right.

[1389] But you're not talking about like Taco smell.

[1390] the smell after right no no it's just a funny play on words yeah but but you have a theory go ahead i don't steal your theory my theory is kind of the more process and junkie process the less smell there is the more odorless the more odorless i'm i can say the less smell okay okay the less smell there is stick with less smell the less smell there is as it's on its way out uh -huh do you What?

[1391] Okay.

[1392] Do you know I was pushing odorless?

[1393] Why?

[1394] Because it doesn't have the word smell in it.

[1395] You just decided you wanted to tell a whole story about the word taco smell.

[1396] Right, because we're not talking about poop, we're talking about food.

[1397] So if you say taco smell and you're thinking about food, great.

[1398] If you use the words smell when talking about duty, then I think you just opt for odorless.

[1399] Okay.

[1400] Okay.

[1401] That's your opinion.

[1402] That's just my opinion.

[1403] Yeah.

[1404] So are you saying if you were to eat just a whole ripe avocado, it would be horrendous?

[1405] Not horrendous, but it's going to be...

[1406] Aromatic.

[1407] Yeah.

[1408] Okay.

[1409] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1410] That's also a little bit of a euphemism.

[1411] Or like a big smell.

[1412] A big salad.

[1413] A big salad.

[1414] Is triggering for you.

[1415] It's probably not going to be great.

[1416] I don't know.

[1417] We're opposites.

[1418] This is so interesting.

[1419] So, so interesting.

[1420] I think mine makes the most logical sense, actually.

[1421] It makes none.

[1422] If you put stinky stuff in, it should be stinky coming out.

[1423] A salad doesn't smell.

[1424] stinky.

[1425] But it's real food.

[1426] It's getting like processed in a real way.

[1427] And so when it comes out, it's real.

[1428] Right.

[1429] So when the tacos mall or the dominoes comes out.

[1430] And now we're getting into trouble because.

[1431] So anyway, Adam.

[1432] Adam Devine.

[1433] So you said that high protein and low carb diets affect boners.

[1434] It affected my boner.

[1435] So what is, It does do that kind of diet.

[1436] Well, mainly, carbs isn't a really important macronutrient in your body's production of hormones.

[1437] So it does affect testosterone production.

[1438] Low carb does.

[1439] It limits your testosterone.

[1440] Yes.

[1441] And that has an impact on your peepee.

[1442] It can.

[1443] Yeah.

[1444] I sure can.

[1445] So you're right.

[1446] You got to go over to four hands.

[1447] You'll eat eating medicine.

[1448] That's right.

[1449] Or eat some carbs.

[1450] I don't know.

[1451] Your choice.

[1452] dealer's choice.

[1453] Eat a bread stick or two.

[1454] The specific diet I was on was called glycogen depletion, right?

[1455] And when I would load on the glycogen, boy, watch out.

[1456] There was a pink elephant in the room, let's just say.

[1457] Like I would eat all these boxes of fruity pebbles.

[1458] That's how I would reload my glycogen.

[1459] Yeah.

[1460] And then there was something that we had to address, which was there was a pink elephant in the room.

[1461] You know what I'm saying?

[1462] Oh, sure.

[1463] There was something like an unavoidable topic.

[1464] Kristen's she described it as like you just appeared and then and then leapt out of the dark shadows yeah with your panties off uh -huh fully aroused stuck it in her okay well she was like oh no I didn't want that help me oh geez why did I marry this person so yeah okay great he's younger than me though right although when I did that I was younger than him but maybe he just maybe he has a lot of testosterone I bet he does so then it can be lower but he still has some level that everyone's different.

[1465] Yeah, my father had tragically low testosterone had to have testosterone replacement therapy.

[1466] Also trauma.

[1467] Yeah.

[1468] Like accidents, not like, but maybe the other trauma too.

[1469] But like physical accidents also seem to have some effect on your hormone production later in life.

[1470] Yeah, my father had like two DOAs.

[1471] You know, he was an accident's nonstop.

[1472] Mm -hmm.

[1473] That car accidents.

[1474] But how would it affect your testosterone?

[1475] I don't know why it does, but there's some link between that.

[1476] Rob, add that to the fact checklist.

[1477] Yep.

[1478] So you're saying that you have no testosterone?

[1479] I mean, low, low.

[1480] I don't think you do.

[1481] Well, no, I've been tested.

[1482] I know, but I just don't think you do.

[1483] Right.

[1484] I know you've been tested.

[1485] Uh -huh.

[1486] And I have, and I'm on testosterone cream.

[1487] Right.

[1488] Uh -huh.

[1489] Your levels came back low, so you're on a cream.

[1490] Uh -huh.

[1491] Uh -huh.

[1492] I love it.

[1493] But I just think that person.

[1494] Oh, you do?

[1495] Yeah.

[1496] Yeah, it's very intimate.

[1497] Oh, my gosh.

[1498] It's like mixed vapor rub?

[1499] Yes, it's fixed vapor rubs for your thigh.

[1500] But imagine at night having to like apply a cream to your inner thigh.

[1501] I mean, it's...

[1502] Your inner thigh?

[1503] Okay, now it's become inner thigh.

[1504] Absolutely.

[1505] And I actually when I put it on...

[1506] Well, no, but I think about this.

[1507] So I put it on my thigh and then I have to consider, well, my penis is going to hang down and touch my thigh while I sleep because I wear a loose boxer brief.

[1508] It's the only time I'm not in me undies.

[1509] All right.

[1510] I wear a loose boxer brief.

[1511] to sleep in and I think oh my penis might fall on the side of my thigh yeah so I want to start the cream lower than where I think my penis is going to lie so you started at your knee so I started on my calves and I start with the bottom of my foot uh yeah so it is something that I think about I think oh I don't want my testes or my penis to lay on the testosterone cream because I'm not sure that you're supposed to absorb it through your peepee or your testicles oh even though that's where it's heading eventually interesting yeah I guess I don't want to deny my the joy of converting it all and then sending it back that way.

[1512] Wow.

[1513] But yeah, I just am surprised.

[1514] Because I'm so aggressive?

[1515] No, I mean, because you're horny a lot, I feel like.

[1516] I don't think I'm horny that much.

[1517] Really?

[1518] No. In fact, when I talk to friends my age, you've been a part of some of these conversations.

[1519] We're on a big family trip.

[1520] There's five families and I'll ask the guys how often they're jerking off.

[1521] And these guys are jerking off like every day or every couple days or whatever.

[1522] I'm jerking off like maybe once every nine days.

[1523] Okay.

[1524] That seems low to me. Sure.

[1525] That's true.

[1526] That's true.

[1527] That seems low.

[1528] And I just do want to add as well when I ran all this by my wife like, hey, I'm going to get my testosterone check.

[1529] Then it came back.

[1530] It wasn't that my overall numbers were terribly low, but my free testosterone was terribly low.

[1531] Because I had this hormone globbing agent in my body that attaches to a lot of the testosterone and prevents it from becoming free.

[1532] And then I had to eat a bunch of seeds and nuts, which I've since done, which lowered that level.

[1533] All to say, Kristen's like, let me get this straight.

[1534] You're going to take something like potentially make you more aggressive.

[1535] And I said, well, monitor it.

[1536] You can decide.

[1537] And then I was on it for a few months.

[1538] And she reported back to zero difference.

[1539] If anything, I'm just in a better mood.

[1540] My overall optimism was increased.

[1541] Interesting.

[1542] And not really hornier, unfortunately.

[1543] So when you, like, are flirting, you're not horny then?

[1544] I'm not, no. That's different.

[1545] When I'm flirting with people, by the way, I had this realization the other day on set.

[1546] I was talking with Lake.

[1547] And the conclusion is I definitely flirt with men a lot more than women.

[1548] And if I was being really honest with myself, I was like, oh, that's interesting.

[1549] Because I think she was even going like, have you hooked up with guys?

[1550] And I was like, no. She's like, oh, really?

[1551] That kind of surprises me, which when she said it made sense.

[1552] because I talk nonstop about this one guy's body.

[1553] You talk, you talk.

[1554] Yeah.

[1555] I can see from her point of view, and I talk about guys' bodies all the time.

[1556] I think it's a very logical assumption that I've hooked up with guys.

[1557] Yeah.

[1558] So I went back to my trailer and I was like, that is interesting because I don't desire to hook up with guys.

[1559] So why do I like flirting with them so much?

[1560] And you know what I think I figured out is the stakes are higher?

[1561] Like, if I can get a guy to flirt back with me, it's more of a challenge because we're both straight and it's an awkward situation so I think like I like the challenge of it that's interesting I was going to say the opposite I was going to say it's safe it's just like when married people flirt with other married people like I think it's like there's a safety there because there's no real risk of anything actually happening or not risk no chance of anything actually happening you're free to kind of like really go out on a limb.

[1562] Well, you're definitely right.

[1563] That's a big, a huge chunk of it, you're right, is that I'm not nervous that this very empowered guy I'm flirting with is going to feel weird about me making jokes.

[1564] Yeah.

[1565] I have a strong desire to make those jokes and I don't want to do it to women.

[1566] Sure.

[1567] So that's part of it.

[1568] But I definitely think the whole challenge part of it is part as well.

[1569] I've known a couple people that don't flirt at all.

[1570] And the couple people are like some of the most, gorgeous people I ever met my life and I've it's so weird when you meet someone that doesn't seem to have that desire for approval and then I thought it through it was like yeah I guess if you've always had that approval from day one yeah there's nothing entertaining about it there's no there's no game to be played yeah because you always are getting it so what a boring game yeah they can safely assume the person already is attracted to them that's true yeah yeah okay so are there versions of the national anthem that are racist mm -hmm So there is a lot of stuff out there about the Star -Spangled Banner.

[1571] The withheld verses, right?

[1572] Yeah, there's an extra stanza or something where it's a little racist.

[1573] I mean, I have it here, but...

[1574] Read it.

[1575] Okay, I just don't think we'll get it.

[1576] Well, and also it's like a lot of these articles say you have to look into the author of the Star -Spangled Banner.

[1577] That's part of why.

[1578] But okay, so he wrote a full third stanza decrying the former slaves who are now working for the British Army.

[1579] It goes like this.

[1580] Okay.

[1581] What if I started saying?

[1582] I wouldn't love it.

[1583] And where is that band who so vauntingly swore that the havoc of war and the battle's confusion, a home in a country should leave us no more?

[1584] Question.

[1585] Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps pollution.

[1586] no refugee could save the hireling and slave from the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave and the star -spangled banner and triumph doth wave or the land of the free and the home of the brave.

[1587] That's not the thing I'm thinking of.

[1588] Oh.

[1589] That's kind of innocuous.

[1590] There were slaves then.

[1591] We don't.

[1592] We don't.

[1593] No, do you understand what that means?

[1594] I don't.

[1595] Yeah, you don't.

[1596] Neither do I. But they're saying that it is negative and I'm going to have to believe it because I don't know what that is.

[1597] I don't know what that means either.

[1598] Yeah.

[1599] okay wait hold on so in this article it said that stanza in other words key author was saying that the blood of all the former slaves and hirelings on the battlefield will wash away the pollution of the british invaders with key still bitter that some black soldiers got the best of him a few weeks earlier the star spangled banner is as much a patriotic song as it is a distract to black people who had the audacity to fight for their freedom okay so okay so that's what you were talking about I guess.

[1600] But I'm actually talking about that what we, the national anthem isn't the Star Spangled Banner, is it?

[1601] Yeah.

[1602] It is?

[1603] Yes.

[1604] The Home of the Brave.

[1605] Oh, say, can you see?

[1606] By the Dawn's Early Light.

[1607] I sang it at a baseball game.

[1608] You did?

[1609] No. Yes, I did.

[1610] What are you talking about?

[1611] Not by myself.

[1612] Not by myself.

[1613] My chorus sang it.

[1614] Oh, okay.

[1615] So you know all the words?

[1616] Yeah.

[1617] I'm murky on some of the middle parts.

[1618] I bet I really do know all of them if I tried.

[1619] Say, can you see by the Don's early light?

[1620] that's all I know Anyway I was saying it I think 6th and 8th grade At least two of those years And one year My parents got home from work And we had to drive to the stadium And there was so much traffic And I was so annoyed at them At your parents Of course As if they ordered the traffic Yeah and like why couldn't they just come home early and then what now we're in a rush now I'm not going to make it there now I'm stressed out yeah it's because of your stupid job you owe them a lot of amends nope nope nope I mean they were nice ass parents I was giving them a lot I was giving them a lot I was giving them good grades and and a lot of compliments from teachers teachers loved me I bet they did Yeah You're an overachiever You know what I bet you anything We'd have to ask him But I really do I bet knowing them If they had to do it all over again They'd pick that version Uh huh Then someone who was super super super sweet And lovely to them Who to the outside was bad Who like what didn't have her shit together And No you had your shit together Kind of right I mean I was fucking On double final notice And I got suspended all the time and I barely graduated high school.

[1621] Right.

[1622] And I went from being in the math and science club to fucking dropping out of half my classes and skip.

[1623] I mean, yeah.

[1624] Yeah, the police were at my house in the morning during the car show.

[1625] I came home with black eyes all the times.

[1626] I was fighting.

[1627] I mean, but I was so sweet to my mom.

[1628] Yeah.

[1629] Snuggly with her and I go on dates with her to the movies and stuff.

[1630] So I think I would I would pick my version.

[1631] I mean, you would pick your version.

[1632] That's not surprise us, does it?

[1633] Well, I didn't say what I'd pick.

[1634] What would you pick?

[1635] and I stand by that they got what they wanted out of me. In this binary option.

[1636] Or you're either a fuck up in that.

[1637] I don't think you can do both.

[1638] Come on.

[1639] I would pick.

[1640] A naughty nice boy?

[1641] I'd pick, God, that's really hard.

[1642] It would really, it would really stress me out to know that.

[1643] They were on the wrong path.

[1644] And not even on the wrong path, but like causing other people problems.

[1645] That would be very hard for me. me. I think I probably would rather like me being the brunt of whatever the problem was.

[1646] Right.

[1647] As opposed to other people having to take that on somehow.

[1648] Yeah, my teacher's bore the brunt of that.

[1649] Yeah, see, that would make me. I'd save my niceness for my mom.

[1650] That'd make me very uncomfortable.

[1651] And Aaron Weekly.

[1652] Yeah.

[1653] And whenever a girl, I was a terrible boyfriend, too.

[1654] You're terrible back then?

[1655] I was.

[1656] I mean, I was, I was very nice and loving.

[1657] I just was so not loyal.

[1658] We were sharing about it last night in the A meeting, yeah, it was the topic kind of and it's like, oh, God.

[1659] Yeah, it's still kind of a black cloud over me. It's weird.

[1660] I don't want to, I never wish to excuse my behavior, but I also hope to forgive myself at some point that for whatever reason, I found that impossible.

[1661] Yeah.

[1662] I tried.

[1663] Yeah.

[1664] Oh.

[1665] Why do you think?

[1666] low self -esteem needing everyone's approval if I could get it it was worth whatever was happening I don't know maybe sexual abuse I was over -sexualized I'm not sure yeah what was going on but boy was I was not good at it hmm yeah started in eighth grade that's the first time I cheated horrible I felt fucking terrible yeah oh trying to think of my theory on why because it doesn't seem like It's because you like someone more.

[1667] No, that wasn't the case.

[1668] I was like, I loved these girls.

[1669] Yeah.

[1670] I mean, truly, I would have died for them.

[1671] I would have pushed them out of the way of a train to save them.

[1672] I would have, you know.

[1673] But boy, if I was on spring break, all bets are off.

[1674] I wonder if it's like you just have this like compartmentalization.

[1675] Well, now that's something I've thought.

[1676] thought about post -addiction, I have realized that if you spend a good decade as an addict, you do get really good at building compartments in your head.

[1677] You just have to for survival or you'd kill yourself.

[1678] Yeah.

[1679] And I do think that I'm dangerously good at making compartments in my head for sure.

[1680] Yeah.

[1681] Yeah, I think that's probably what it is.

[1682] Yeah, but I guess maybe as a kid because I was checking in and out of environments and I was already probably compartmentalizing.

[1683] You had, you built up a skill of compartmentalization because you had to and then you had that skill.

[1684] So then it probably bled into this other area, I would guess.

[1685] I've also hit you with this theory, right, that I think I was punishing my mom sometimes.

[1686] Like I think I didn't want my mom to travel.

[1687] Like I wanted her around more.

[1688] So then when she was gone, I was pretty naughty.

[1689] I never got caught.

[1690] I didn't want to get caught.

[1691] But I wanted to feel like I had some power in the relationship.

[1692] But like, well, if you're going to do that, then I'm going to.

[1693] to do whatever the fuck I want.

[1694] That's the price you're going to pay for not being here.

[1695] And I think maybe that association just with women in general maybe where I was going to punish them if I wasn't getting exactly what selfish Dax wanted might also be in the mix.

[1696] Yeah.

[1697] I don't know.

[1698] Yeah.

[1699] It's unsightly.

[1700] He said that he went to Orange Coast Community College and he said that because UCLA was really expensive, which it is.

[1701] In -state, 2019, 2020, it's $11 ,000 and out -of -state, $41 ,000.

[1702] But $11 ,000 in state, man, that is a fucking bargain these days.

[1703] I pray that my daughters want to go to a UC school.

[1704] I mean, they won't be able to get in, but we don't know that.

[1705] They won't.

[1706] They were not, they're not going to get in one of those schools.

[1707] What?

[1708] You have to have a fucking 4 .03.

[1709] You don't know what they're going to have.

[1710] All right.

[1711] You're right.

[1712] I don't know.

[1713] But I don't.

[1714] But I don't.

[1715] don't, I'm certainly not going to be pushing them to study.

[1716] Oh, so you're crazy, right?

[1717] First of all, they're going to get rid of that legacy bullshit.

[1718] Your admission is weighted if you had a parent that went to a school.

[1719] That's pretty general across the nation.

[1720] And that's going to go away as it should.

[1721] Yeah.

[1722] Because all that is is like another piece of privilege.

[1723] Like, of course, if your parents went to fucking UCLA, odds are you already started with a better shot.

[1724] Exactly.

[1725] You don't need an extra better shot.

[1726] Agreed.

[1727] Yeah.

[1728] As much as I want them to be able to get into UCLA, I also don't, I don't, I don't, I don't want some kid to be deprived of going there because I went there.

[1729] At any rate, I, yeah, I don't think they're going to be 4 .1 students.

[1730] I certainly won't be pushing them to be.

[1731] Mm -hmm.

[1732] But we don't know.

[1733] We don't know.

[1734] Let them be what they're going to be.

[1735] They could do it to rebel against me. Wouldn't that be ironic?

[1736] Well, don't tell them not to be 4 .1 students.

[1737] I think I will.

[1738] No. It's not the most important thing.

[1739] I would weigh whether they had a social life and they had all these memories and they went on road trips like I did.

[1740] It's an incredibly good skill to be disciplined.

[1741] And when you're in high school, that's the.

[1742] outlet for that.

[1743] But I'd rather see them exhibit discipline in writing the things they want to write in planning a trip and realizing that dream.

[1744] Like it's just what you value of how you're exhibiting your discipline.

[1745] It's for yourself.

[1746] It's trying to be the best version of yourself you can be and pushing yourself when things it's shitty to do this spelling homework.

[1747] Yes.

[1748] I want them to push themselves and be disciplined, but I want it to be about the things they're passionate about.

[1749] And I don't want to It's easy to be disciplined about things you love.

[1750] It's not easy to be disciplined about things you don't want to do.

[1751] And in life, you're going to encounter things you don't want to do.

[1752] And you need that ability to be able to get through those.

[1753] But I totally disagree.

[1754] Because over the last 25 years, I've known 1 ,000 actors in L .A. And they're pursuing something they love.

[1755] And the level of discipline is staggering.

[1756] Even when pursuing something they love, yeah, I think as long as they're disciplined, that the thing they're passionate about, I'm stoked.

[1757] Great.

[1758] Okay, so Orange Coast Community College, what I just spoke about.

[1759] He said is the second biggest community college in the country.

[1760] He said there's like 50 ,000 kids that go to school there, and then you said, like, Notre Dame.

[1761] So Orange Coast Community College enrolls more than 25 ,000 students each semester.

[1762] It's not the biggest in the country.

[1763] Biggest is Miami -Dade College.

[1764] college in Miami.

[1765] How many kids go there?

[1766] 174 ,000.

[1767] Oh my God.

[1768] I'm sure a lot of those are online.

[1769] I would guess.

[1770] It's like the size of Minneapolis or something.

[1771] I know.

[1772] That's crazy.

[1773] And then Notre Dame has a total undergraduate enrollment of 8 ,617.

[1774] That's it.

[1775] It's hard to get in there.

[1776] There's only 8 ,000 kids at Notre Dame.

[1777] And total undergraduate enrollment.

[1778] So there's more kids there.

[1779] But this is.

[1780] So times four.

[1781] Yeah.

[1782] Yeah, I mean, people leave in, but yeah.

[1783] Okay.

[1784] Oh, the Matthew Lillard, Freddie Prince Jr. movie is summer catch.

[1785] Summer catch.

[1786] 2001 summer catch.

[1787] What was I saying?

[1788] Fever catch.

[1789] You say catch or catch?

[1790] Summer catch.

[1791] Well, summer catch.

[1792] I think I said catch.

[1793] Did I?

[1794] I think he said catch.

[1795] I'll have to go back and listen.

[1796] Maybe.

[1797] I think I say catch.

[1798] Let's play catch.

[1799] Catch a tiger by his toe.

[1800] I think I say catch, yeah.

[1801] Summer catch.

[1802] Oh.

[1803] But it's catch.

[1804] Oh.

[1805] That's all.

[1806] That was it?

[1807] Yeah.

[1808] Okay.

[1809] Well, that was manageable.

[1810] It was more than a few, less than a lot.

[1811] More than none.

[1812] Less than a bunch.

[1813] All right.

[1814] Well, I love you.

[1815] Love you.

[1816] Let's do this again tomorrow.

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