Singapore Sona

[0] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.

[1] Want to talk to Conan?

[2] Visit teamco .com slash call Conan.

[3] Okay, let's get started.

[4] Hi, Dee.

[5] Welcome to Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.

[6] Hi, Dee.

[7] That's me. Hi, Dee.

[8] How are you, Dee?

[9] It is you.

[10] Really good, Conan.

[11] Look at you.

[12] Wow.

[13] Look at me. You've got a little beard going on.

[14] Look at me. Yeah, I just, I've took a little break from shaving, and I'm starting to look like the grotten fisherman.

[15] Oh, wait.

[16] That's the reference that no one's going to get.

[17] Dee, where are you calling us from?

[18] Wow, I'm from Singapore.

[19] So that's what's happening.

[20] Six in the morning here.

[21] I'm up and early for you guys.

[22] I've never been to Singapore.

[23] Tell me...

[24] Well, you should, absolutely.

[25] Tell me a little bit about yourself.

[26] What do you do?

[27] How's your life going?

[28] You know, lay it on me. Oh, okay.

[29] Wow.

[30] Firstly, this feels like a fever dream, so I'm just going to need to settle in a bit because, wow.

[31] You guys, you guys are beautiful.

[32] Oh, thank you.

[33] Oh, you're, you're very stunning.

[34] Yeah, you're the beautiful one.

[35] Yeah, yeah.

[36] Yeah, we feel, we feel terrible compared to you.

[37] Well, Sona, stop.

[38] Yeah, Sona's beautiful.

[39] Sona's beautiful, but.

[40] My hair a little bit.

[41] Sona's a very attractive woman.

[42] Just a couple hot girls, you and me. And then there's me and Gorley.

[43] Hey, don't take me down with you.

[44] A bunch of creeps.

[45] D, uh, Tell us about your life.

[46] What's happening?

[47] Well, what is happening?

[48] Hmm, let's see.

[49] What do you do?

[50] What do you do?

[51] I'll work at a hair salon.

[52] So I do a lot of hair stuff.

[53] Okay.

[54] Yeah.

[55] Are you actually a hair stylist?

[56] No, I'm not, though.

[57] I wish I was.

[58] But I think there's a lot of ladders to climb for that.

[59] Eventually, maybe, I will.

[60] Well, wait.

[61] What do you do with the hair?

[62] What do you do at the hair salon?

[63] What do I do?

[64] I do, like, reception.

[65] I manage things, make sure nothing's on fire.

[66] Okay, for a second there, I thought you didn't have a job there.

[67] You just hung around.

[68] Yeah, honestly, oftentimes I do.

[69] Oftentimes I'm just there.

[70] I'm just, guys, if you need me, I'm here.

[71] But yeah, I get to, like, wash people's hair every now and then.

[72] I get to pop some color on every now and then, yeah.

[73] What?

[74] Okay, that's, now we're talking, because this fascinates me. You wash men and women's hair, right?

[75] Yes, yes.

[76] Mostly women.

[77] Men, there's a couple of them who pop in every now and then, which is strange to me. Like, you know when men don't go to, like, a barbershop and they come to, like, a hairdresser?

[78] Yeah.

[79] It's a weird one.

[80] It's a strange one.

[81] And then they're there, and I'm like, why are you here?

[82] Like, this is a very women -friendly, cozy space, and you're just coming in with your men's hair.

[83] I don't have to wash it, you know.

[84] Dee, I have a theory that, Maybe some of these men would just, like, they're hair washed by a beautiful woman.

[85] Is that possible?

[86] Honestly, yes.

[87] Because, like, I mean, we're all women working as well.

[88] We're all women.

[89] So it's like, I think they just come in to, like, have a look at us, which is fine.

[90] Yeah.

[91] I'm okay with that.

[92] But it's just strange when you have to wash the hair because they're just there and your hands in the greasy hair.

[93] And I don't know.

[94] It's just strange.

[95] They don't move right.

[96] I don't know if you guys can relate.

[97] up.

[98] They don't, what?

[99] They don't, like, move right.

[100] Like, you got to, like, tilt your head a little, yeah, Conan.

[101] Oh, I get that.

[102] I know when I've had my hair washed at a salon.

[103] I don't know what they want, so I try to anticipate it, and then it just ends up air.

[104] Oh, no, that's the worst thing you could do.

[105] Well, it's not that bad.

[106] I'll tell you.

[107] Here's what I do.

[108] In that same idea, Dee, what I do, you know, when you have to register your face on an iPhone, you know, so that for facial recognition.

[109] I always just when my hair is being washed I think it helps I move it constantly Oh my God that's eerie So they can anticipate it And then I go counterclockwise And sometimes I do it very rapidly Absolutely what everyone does And it drives me insane I'm like you can't I'm just gonna end up waterboarding you So you gotta sit up Just listen to instruction I get to e -up Yeah Wow okay so So you work at this Today in my life, I guess.

[110] Okay.

[111] And tell us, how's your life going?

[112] Tell me about your life.

[113] Are things on the up and up?

[114] Oh, Conan.

[115] I want to help you.

[116] You're hearing of the deep questions here at six in the morning.

[117] Let's see.

[118] Hmm, what is going on?

[119] What do I need help with?

[120] I love every question.

[121] She turns back to you with a question.

[122] Do I don't know how it's going for me?

[123] I'm in terrible trouble.

[124] I'm trapped in a room with people that don't respect me. You know, yeah.

[125] Yeah, I, you know, aging out of a career.

[126] I mean, what am I going to tell you?

[127] You know, it's over for me. I'm at the very end of my life.

[128] Yeah.

[129] It's okay.

[130] Oh, no. No one was saying it, so I felt like I had to.

[131] No, no, no, no. You were hoping someone would say it.

[132] Life expectancy in my family, I think I have six months to go.

[133] But that's, it's fine.

[134] I've had a good ride.

[135] So that's what's happening with me. That's how I feel, though.

[136] Like, I feel the same way.

[137] What are you talking about?

[138] You're a beautiful.

[139] young woman.

[140] How old are you?

[141] You're the opposite of him.

[142] How old are you?

[143] Nah.

[144] I'm 27, but you know what I'm 27.

[145] Oh yeah, you're done.

[146] Yeah.

[147] No, I mean, you have another, please, D, you have at least two years to go.

[148] I know.

[149] I've been to, I thought that two years ago, but yeah.

[150] So what I don't know, I feel like everything.

[151] Yeah.

[152] What do you want to do?

[153] You're young, you're very attractive.

[154] You've got your whole life ahead of you, but what are the things that you'd like to do?

[155] What do you dream of doing that would put some zest into your life?

[156] Let's see.

[157] I don't know, maybe do something like bungee jump.

[158] Why not?

[159] That could be fun.

[160] Well, I have a good, why not.

[161] Let's put that on that, yeah.

[162] Yeah, if the cord's too long, you hit the canyon floor.

[163] Well, I think they would have sorted that out.

[164] Yeah, they figure that out before you do it.

[165] I think they, in some places, they use the first four people disorder now.

[166] Yeah, true fact.

[167] I think they just send you off and then they've crossed their fingers.

[168] Yeah, yeah.

[169] And then they, okay, that one's dead.

[170] Let's, let's cut six feet off the rope, you know?

[171] Let's try it again.

[172] Okay, that one dead too.

[173] Another, a few more.

[174] It's like cutting hair.

[175] You always want to leave it a little long to see if it's okay and then you cut from there.

[176] Absolutely, there you go.

[177] Yeah.

[178] That's precisely how it looks.

[179] Yeah.

[180] It makes sense, but yeah.

[181] I like you because no matter what stupid thing I say you're right there to say yes of course which is really nice I want the same length we're good can I can I ask you and if I'm it's just too personal you can say back off but how's your romantic life going oh back off Conan I you know I feel like I'm asking in a fatherly you know uncle way yeah uncle Conan all right so grab your teeth Hmm Nothing much is going on There's things that goes on You know when you're 27 There's lots of things I don't I don't know Yeah Nothing happened When I was 27 Yeah No It was a quiet Quiet time In my life Of course it was the late 1950s We were all worried About Sputnik But that's not the point Yeah I've got Gourley now You do Don't stop Keep going Yeah Go like a Sputnik talk Let's do more of that So I mean What's the dating scene Like in Singapore?

[182] There's not much of a scene I would say Well there is But not one that I don't know Goes well with me So I don't know It's like This things happening here and there I just You know I don't really like to put my finger on it And be like Oh that's the one for me Or There's things happening Conan Things are looking good though So that's Oh good It's a note for that.

[183] Yeah.

[184] Oh, so you got something really?

[185] Yeah.

[186] Exactly.

[187] Is there a potential person out there of interest?

[188] Possibly, yes.

[189] But you might jeopardize it.

[190] I'm not going to jeopardize anything.

[191] I just want to know who this person is.

[192] But you can't talk about it because then he's going to hear it.

[193] And he's going to be like, wait a minute.

[194] This is moving too fast for me because I've been there.

[195] Yes, I know.

[196] Unless he really really is into her and is like, like is bolstered by this.

[197] and then suddenly decides to make more reciprocation because he feels confidence.

[198] That's what ladies like is more reciprocation.

[199] What do you mean?

[200] I've seen that on a little candy heart.

[201] I would like to reciprocate with you.

[202] So you don't want to talk specifically about this person just yet.

[203] Yeah, you don't want to like sabotage it, you know, in any way.

[204] And maybe it's nothing.

[205] Maybe.

[206] I don't know.

[207] Let it go.

[208] To get involved.

[209] Just tell us his name.

[210] No, guys, I'm with you, Dee.

[211] I'm going to try to comment down over here.

[212] No, I need to get involved.

[213] I need to meet this guy.

[214] Yeah.

[215] Because, Dee, we care about you.

[216] We have a bond with you.

[217] And I don't want just some anybody coming along.

[218] Right.

[219] You know, some, you know, Johnny Singapore.

[220] Well, that's his name.

[221] Is it Johnny Singapore?

[222] I hate that guy.

[223] I know.

[224] This is why she didn't want to say it.

[225] All he does is hit it and quit it.

[226] I'm reciprocate.

[227] Oh, God.

[228] If his name's Johnny Singapore, call it off now.

[229] Do you understand?

[230] Got it, got it, got it, got it on component, yeah.

[231] Dee, uh, do you tell us, do your parents get involved in this stuff?

[232] Oh, no, not at all.

[233] No, not at all.

[234] I'm very private, I like to say, except I just sit this on the podcast, so.

[235] Yeah.

[236] Yeah, but you didn't, I mean, first of all, yeah, like, no one's going to see this anyway, so it's fine.

[237] Okay.

[238] You just crossed a line, Dee.

[239] I'm kidding, obviously, I'm going to see it and like three other people I know.

[240] I like, I do like you too.

[241] I don't show you if on the fence.

[242] Dee, you would work.

[243] You would fit right in to my organization.

[244] Yes, yeah.

[245] We would be best friends.

[246] You're like Singapore Sona.

[247] That's my favorite cocktail.

[248] You are the Singapore Sona.

[249] We can just keep you away from Singapore, Johnny.

[250] We're okay.

[251] Is there a Singapore version of me?

[252] Are there guys like me in Singapore?

[253] I wish, Conan.

[254] I wish.

[255] I've always thought that.

[256] Like, if that was a Conan out there for me, I'll be done.

[257] I'll be settled.

[258] Oh, wow.

[259] That's very flattering.

[260] Well, I want to tell all the ladies out there, no matter where you live in the world, there's a Conan out there for you.

[261] It has to me, though.

[262] So get your, get a double.

[263] bolt for your door.

[264] Sit off the streets until they catch him.

[265] Tell your children about the dangers of a Conan in your neighborhood.

[266] Is there a Conan in your neighborhood?

[267] Stay low.

[268] I think, um, yeah, the whole campaign, if you see something, say something, started with, uh, if there's a Conan in your, on your subway.

[269] Teach your children how to spot a Conan.

[270] Is he six four?

[271] Red beady eyes.

[272] Like the commune.

[273] Does his hair look like a tort that would be served at a French reception?

[274] Tree blowing in the wind or Conan?

[275] Be sure you know the difference.

[276] Wow.

[277] Man, you're a lot of fun, Dee.

[278] I hope this guy, listen, here's my advice to you.

[279] You have to make sure that you have high standards because you're a special person.

[280] You have to have high standards.

[281] And be honest, Sona, I do tell this.

[282] to the women that work for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[283] And I've always have that you cannot settle.

[284] You can't say, okay, good enough.

[285] You have to hold out for this special.

[286] Well, then why are they working for you?

[287] Oh, I say professionally you have to settle.

[288] Yeah, I'm talking only about romantically.

[289] I see.

[290] Romantically don't settle.

[291] I see.

[292] But if you get a chance to work for sort of a shitty podcast operation, grab it.

[293] That's cool.

[294] Yeah, I think that's really good.

[295] Don't settle.

[296] And I like your free spirit.

[297] I like your free spirit and your optimism.

[298] Do you know what you want to do with yourself?

[299] Do you think there's a future for you working in this hair salon business?

[300] Or do you want to do something else completely?

[301] Yeah, I think I can see myself growing in this industry.

[302] We'll see, though, because I don't know.

[303] I tend to do different things after a while.

[304] So I've been doing this for like two years now.

[305] And now I want to do something else maybe.

[306] Who knows?

[307] But I think I'm not too worried about that.

[308] At your age, I liked to, two years was about the maximum that, seriously, I'm not joking.

[309] When I was in my 20s, if I did something for more than two years, it felt like an eternity.

[310] I just wanted to move on to the next thing.

[311] Exactly.

[312] Yeah, but I'll figure that out.

[313] No stress, right?

[314] I'm only 27, right?

[315] No stress, no pressure.

[316] Yeah.

[317] No, I think you're feeling some stress.

[318] Well, like I'm getting old or anything.

[319] No, you're not.

[320] You're not.

[321] You're not.

[322] Get over that right now.

[323] You don't know that.

[324] What?

[325] You're talking like someone who's in there.

[326] I'll be like 52.

[327] Oh, I'll be long day.

[328] Don't worry about that.

[329] What?

[330] Yeah, he might.

[331] Yeah.

[332] Someone said you're a fan of my style, my clothing style.

[333] Is that true?

[334] Yeah.

[335] You had a question about his fashion sense.

[336] Yeah, you had a question for me, right?

[337] Yeah, no, basically, I was just thinking, what happened to your leather jacket, the one that you used to wear all the time?

[338] Like, that was you ever.

[339] at your peak, I would think.

[340] Oh, where is he?

[341] Should you bring him out?

[342] Well, it's a she, first of all.

[343] Her name's Enid.

[344] And, no, I did have one leather jacket that I wore in so many different remotes.

[345] And then, um...

[346] That's the one.

[347] I think after Kevin Hart and Ice Cube just were mocking me so much from my clothing style.

[348] Yeah, that I, uh...

[349] They said I looked like a male prostit.

[350] No, they did And they said We'd make a lot of money off of you We're going to put you out on this street Oh, Conan Did that hurt your feelings?

[351] No, I found it very erotic And it's another money It's another revenue source So It's kind of a compliment I think it is I think it is Absolutely it is I still wear I have a weakness For leather coats Especially old ones the one you're talking about is from the late 1940s or the 1950s.

[352] I love those jackets.

[353] The problem is any jacket that was made, the ones I love are like 40 years old.

[354] They're real sort of antiques.

[355] The arms are always too short.

[356] The arms are always too short because people, there was nobody like me until they had proper nutrition.

[357] So whenever I see a jacket I really love, I, you know, in some cool store that is from the 40s or the 50s I put it on and it's all beat up and cool and the sleeves come to about here and I look, yeah, it's so I, it's hard for me to find those but I will, I'm gonna, you know, just because you said so, I'm gonna start wearing it more often again.

[358] You should put it on the podcast, you know, just bring her out every now and then.

[359] You know, I'm sure the fans would love to see.

[360] Why not?

[361] Yeah.

[362] Doesn't Dee have Yeah, she's got it style She's got it You have, you know, I have to say I don't pretty much I would do anything D told me Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Like, it's, it is very dangerous Like, I don't care what it is If she said, come on, Conan, Just get on the motorcycle And drive over the flaming barrel Dee, now's your chance Ask him get him to do something, you know?

[363] Exactly, could you just do a backslip now?

[364] I don't know, why not?

[365] You know, I think If you say I can do it, I can do it.

[366] Do it.

[367] No, don't do it, actually.

[368] Do your bones.

[369] Do it.

[370] His bones are a bit fragile.

[371] That's just take care of you.

[372] You're fine.

[373] What if I get three really strong men to just rotate my body slowly and then set me down and then immediately take me for a nap?

[374] We're going to have to look outside the building for that.

[375] Yeah, I'll find it.

[376] Dee, it's really nice talking to you.

[377] You've got your very, you're very, very cool and you're And you guys don't too.

[378] No, you're really self -possessed and you are beautiful and very young and everything's looking your way but don't forget what I said do not settle.

[379] You need a really special...

[380] You need a really special guy.

[381] It's got to be someone really special and they've got to clear, they've got to get my approval whoever it is.

[382] You need to be her wingman.

[383] I'll be your wingman.

[384] Yeah.

[385] You should come out to Singapore sometime.

[386] Take a walk.

[387] What would you do?

[388] What would you take Conan to do?

[389] Yeah, what would we do if I came and visited you in Singapore?

[390] I don't know.

[391] We're going to take lots of walks.

[392] We're going to walk a lot.

[393] I mean, I wish I could tell you those beautiful things to see.

[394] But really, it's just skyscrapers.

[395] It's sunny.

[396] It's really sunny.

[397] That's not going to be good for you.

[398] It's the topics, right?

[399] Yeah, I don't know.

[400] Maybe you shouldn't come then because it's really good.

[401] D, you spoke for like 30 seconds and went from you've got to come to you really shouldn't come.

[402] Maybe not the tourism board for you.

[403] If there's a really expensive restaurant you've always wanted to go to, you can have him take you there.

[404] What are you talking about?

[405] Yeah.

[406] Or, you know, if there's like a nice shop you always wanted to shop in, you could take him there.

[407] And I'd be like, oh, I really like this jacket.

[408] Whoops.

[409] I wish someone got it for me. Yes.

[410] And I'd be next to you going, yeah, I wish someone would.

[411] Well, anyway, let's go.

[412] Let's go find an international house of pancakes.

[413] Yeah.

[414] It's Singapore.

[415] It's international.

[416] It's international.

[417] Come on.

[418] Legally, the UN says they have to exist in every country.

[419] Well, Dee, I will make it there someday.

[420] I will.

[421] And I'll find you and bring back your travel stuff, mate.

[422] Like, you need to do that again.

[423] Okay.

[424] I mean, I'm telling you what to do.

[425] Dude, what am I?

[426] Who am I?

[427] No, no, you're, listen, Dee, you are very persuasive and very cool.

[428] And everything you say, I really do feel like, yep, D's right.

[429] I got to get that leather jacket.

[430] I got to get back on the road.

[431] It's time to go, go, go.

[432] Yeah, we got to stop a little.

[433] That is 2023, baby.

[434] Let's go.

[435] Oh, wow.

[436] All right.

[437] Turn into Austin Powers there for a second.

[438] Much more attractive than Austin Powers.

[439] Hey, Dee, thank you so much.

[440] It was really cool talking to you.

[441] Thank you.

[442] You guys have a great day.

[443] Tell those creeps that are hanging around the salon that we know what they're up to, that I'm onto them.

[444] That's another thing I could do.

[445] I could come there and I could hang out the salon and any time a guy comes in, I will toss that guy right on his ass.

[446] Yeah, anytime a Johnny Singapore comes up, they have to get through you.

[447] They have to get past.

[448] Or you could give them the shampoo and then they'll be like, we're never coming back to here.

[449] That would be on.

[450] You know, they come to you and say, Oh, Dee, I'd love it if you shampooed my hair And you'd say, oh, I'm not available today And you step aside and I'm there And I'm like, hello, fellows All right up and I'll give you a nice shampoo But it's going to be the I Live Lucy paradox So they go, okay Yeah, that's true We've got to avoid that.

[451] Hey, Dee, thank you so much.

[452] Have an amazing day.

[453] Thank you again.

[454] You guys are great.

[455] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan with Conan O 'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley.

[456] Produced by me, Matt Gourley.

[457] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Soliteroff, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson at Earwolf.

[458] Music by Jimmy Vivino.

[459] Supervising producer Aaron Blair, Associate Talent Producer Jennifer Samples, Associate producers Sean Doherty and Lisa Burm.

[460] Engineering by Eduardo Perez, please rate, review, and subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

[461] This has been a Team Coco production in association with Stitcher.