Bill Hader Returns

[0] My name's Charles Bronson, and I feel surly.

[1] That's in.

[2] We're using that as the opening.

[3] But it is not Charles Bronson.

[4] In fact, it is.

[5] Me, Bill Hader.

[6] And I feel tired about being torn on a Brian Strang.

[7] It's a lot of work, isn't it?

[8] Fall is here, hear the yell.

[9] Back to school.

[10] Ring the bell.

[11] Brand new shoes.

[12] Walking loose.

[13] Climb the fence.

[14] Books and pens, I can tell that we are going to be friends.

[15] We are going to be friends.

[16] Hello there.

[17] Welcome to Conan O 'Brien Needs a Friend, joined by my good chums.

[18] Son of Sessian.

[19] Hi.

[20] How are you?

[21] I'm doing all right.

[22] You're doing fine.

[23] I am.

[24] Okay.

[25] Thanks for answering for me. Sure.

[26] Yeah.

[27] I didn't really want to know.

[28] I'm just checking a box here.

[29] Your eyes glaze doing it.

[30] And Matt Gourley, you're doing fine, aren't you?

[31] I guess if you say so.

[32] You bet I do.

[33] Okay.

[34] people want pep they don't want to hear about problems i was going to bring up major grievances today but if you tell me i'm fine i guess i got nowhere to go trust me you're fine and quite happy with your salary all right uh we got to talk about something today which is uh actually oh it's a fun thing it's just different uh it's something called conan o 'brien tv are you familiar with this concept matt yes i am okay uh unfortunately Isn't that your dream Just more Conan all the time You're with me every day Making a podcast But then you go home and you get to relax Instead of watching one of your Classics on the Criterion channel You get to hear some more Conan But you know a lot of people would like this I believe that in my mind I got a new free channel And it launches on Wednesday I believe that in my mind I believe that in my mind What about your soul Conan I don't have a soul No, I have a free I have a new free channel It launches on Wednesday, May 24th And it's only on Samsung TV Plus Yeah, so Kind of excited about this.

[35] That's crazy that you should say that Because I do have that I have a Samsung TV And that's when you turn it on That's the first thing you see Is Samsung TV Plus I can't escape you You can't escape me And you know what Most polls show that people Don't want to escape me We weren't in those polls Yeah Because we were in prison What a very strange poll To do by the way Do you want to escape, Conan O 'Brien?

[36] Well, the polling's in.

[37] Anyway, to celebrate the launch of my new channel on Wednesday, May 24th for my New York fans, there's a treat in store for you.

[38] I'm going to have an ice cream truck roaming around the city that has my face on it.

[39] This, by the way, was my childhood dream.

[40] And you follow Samsung TV Plus on Instagram or you can follow it on Twitter or Facebook for live updates on where to find my ice cream truck.

[41] And listen, you think that I've gone too far?

[42] I have not, sir.

[43] Listen to this.

[44] Jordan Schlansky is going to be in the truck handing out ice cream pops.

[45] Oh, wow.

[46] Jordan Slansky is going to be at the ice cream truck to meet fans.

[47] And I think Jordan has many more fans than I do.

[48] People are always stopping me and asking me about Jordan Slansky.

[49] find out for yourself if he's real because he's going to be in the ice cream truck handing out ice cream pops and guess what the pops are in the shape of me oh my god you've jumped the shark what is going on here did you make them do this you know what I did I didn't just jump the shark I got on a motorcycle and and jump the fons on the shark that's how who is currently jumping the shark we've gone that far and it says right here get your Conan Pop while supplies last and come say hello to Jordan Schlansky my associate producer who's going to be in an ice cream truck with my face on it handing out ice cream pops shape like me called to celebrate I want that put into Samsung TV Plus popular usage that when you do something so stupid it's jumping the Fonz and you've done it.

[50] Yeah I've done it yeah Fons jump the shark now we have we put a shark on a motorcycle and jump the fawns.

[51] Anyway, very exciting.

[52] And so check out my new free channel, May 24th launches Samsung TV Plus, ice cream, Jordan Flansky, ice cream truck, Twitter, Facebook.

[53] Listen to the words coming out of your mouth.

[54] Wait, what's on this channel?

[55] It's all Conan all the time.

[56] Some of my best routines and bits from over the years.

[57] Classic Conan.

[58] Oh, I see.

[59] Okay.

[60] Where have you?

[61] Are you high right now?

[62] I'm not high.

[63] I just, you're just like, hey, check out my channel and then there's an ice cream shop.

[64] But what's on your channel?

[65] And it says it on this paper and you're not telling people what's on the channel.

[66] You don't need, listen, when someone says there's Conan O 'Brien on a channel, that tends to be all they need to know.

[67] Are you dancing?

[68] What are you doing?

[69] That channel.

[70] It's my, some of my classic stick and bits from you.

[71] of performing it.

[72] If there's anything I've ever done that you've liked that's going to be on there.

[73] There's also popular celebrity interviews with A -lister's.

[74] Look at that.

[75] Yeah.

[76] That's cool.

[77] Yeah, it's going to showcase all kinds of people.

[78] I'm sorry, I'm selling this better than you are because you're all about that ice cream truck.

[79] I'm telling people what they can watch on it.

[80] Well, you can watch classic interviews I've done with John Hamm, Ryan Reynolds, Tom Hanks, Tom Cruise, Kevin Hart, Will Ferrell, Lisa Goodrow, Dowdogado, Kate McKinnon, Martin, Short.

[81] I mean, you could go on and on and on.

[82] I've interviewed everybody that was ever born or ever will be born.

[83] Anyone who's ever lived on earth, I've talked to them.

[84] And it's all there on Samsung TV Plus.

[85] But it's all about that ice cream.

[86] You've got to get the ice cream.

[87] No, this is uniquely curated stuff as 30 -minute collections of clips.

[88] It's just, I mean, that's all you should have to say.

[89] Okay.

[90] You know?

[91] It's like a Porsche.

[92] It sells itself, you know?

[93] Okay.

[94] I'm a Porsche.

[95] You think you're a Porsche?

[96] Porches don't come with Conan O 'Brien in the back seat.

[97] No, I'm not an actual.

[98] I'm just saying I'm akin to a portion that I'm low slung and packed with power.

[99] I'm manufactured in Germany.

[100] What is low slung?

[101] What does that even mean?

[102] I don't like that.

[103] I can't go.

[104] If you have to go over a speed bump slowly when you're driving with me. Anyway.

[105] The bottom will fall out.

[106] Anyway, I think, I mean, listen to this.

[107] This is going to sweep the nation.

[108] This is going to be all people we're talking about.

[109] Yeah.

[110] And so, wow, this is going to, you know what they're going to do?

[111] Anyone who was thinking of launching a presidential campaign anytime soon is going to hold off until this whole Samsung TV, Conan pops in the shape of Conan ice cream truck, Jordan Slansky thing, calms down.

[112] And then they're going to announce.

[113] You know what I mean?

[114] Can you imagine DeSantis?

[115] DeSantis, like, announcing during this?

[116] And then his people come to him and say, Governor Ron DeSantis, no one knows you're running for president.

[117] But I told you to have a goddamn ice cream truck with my face in the form of pop.

[118] It's too late, Governor DeSantis.

[119] There's already an ice cream truck out there with Jordan Slansky, DeSantis.

[120] Jordan Slansky!

[121] Nuk Disney!

[122] All right, we've got to get on to the business of show.

[123] We have a wonderful guest today, a fantastic guest.

[124] One of my favorites, a dear friend, my guest today, is the co -creator and star of the Emmy Award -winning HBO series.

[125] And by the way, one of my favorite shows, Barry, which is currently airing its fourth and final season.

[126] I'm so excited to talk to him today.

[127] Just, it's a joy every time I get to share any space with this gentleman.

[128] Bill Hader, welcome.

[129] I will say that when you come on the pod or even when I just get to hang with you, I laugh myself.

[130] sick.

[131] I get, I'm sore from laughing at the stuff you do.

[132] And it's so much fun to be around you, whether we're recording it or not.

[133] And I remember now, I had this party at my house and you showed up and we hadn't even greeted each other yet.

[134] There's a bunch of people there at some holiday party.

[135] And you show over my shoulder.

[136] And you're a Germanic guy from the late 19th century who had, you laid it out immediately and I knew exactly what it was.

[137] But you just came up to me and you, a guy from the late 19th century in Germany who had fought me in a duel over a woman and lost, but now you're putting a brave face on and your arm doesn't work because of the dueling and you walk up to me and you were like, you were congratulating me on my house and my wife and trying to put a brave face on it all, but seething with resentment.

[138] Yeah, very nice, O 'Brien.

[139] And it seems like you've done very well for yourself, O 'Brien.

[140] I see And you would say Oh, this is my son You know And I go Ah, you have a son Yeah With the woman that you love Yeah, yeah It's like, very well I see Well, I appreciated the invite Oh Brian I was I was quite I was quite surprised to get it I was And you were like Well, it's nice that you I think you said It was nice that you drove here I go flu I flew here Right But you can try to take that as long as you can.

[141] And then, yeah, eventually someone's like, will you guys please stop?

[142] Well, that is the nature of this world we're in.

[143] Yeah, yeah, please stop that.

[144] Yeah, but I was so happy because, you know, rather than, oh, hey, thanks for having me over.

[145] A place looks great.

[146] This is a really good ham.

[147] It's someone I fought in a duel in Germany.

[148] And I maimed.

[149] Yeah, yeah.

[150] And I won the woman that he loved.

[151] And he's putting a good face on it.

[152] Yeah, it was.

[153] Very, yeah, and immediately.

[154] Yeah, stoic and maimed.

[155] How long did it take you to get all that exposition out?

[156] No, it happened immediately.

[157] No, there's no exposition.

[158] I think he just turned around.

[159] I was like, well, very good, O 'Brien.

[160] I see you've got a very nice house here.

[161] And he went, oh, oh, I surprised, you know, I was like, yes, I was very surprised to get the invitation, O 'Brien.

[162] Yeah.

[163] And then I think you mentioned, since our duel.

[164] Since our duel, I...

[165] It all came out very quickly.

[166] And then it was like, yeah, someone would hand you something.

[167] I'm like, this is the only arm that works dear.

[168] Thank you very much.

[169] I would love a tuna stick or whatever.

[170] It's just, I don't know.

[171] I just was laughing just, but you know who likes those bits of the old school bits like that at those parties is Larry David.

[172] Yeah.

[173] Yeah, yeah, and oh my God, when you get him laughing, it is, he really gives it up.

[174] It's, like, surprising when people go, what's Larry David like?

[175] I'm like, he is a laffer.

[176] Oh, he laughs so hard at stuff.

[177] Also, have you noticed it when Larry laughs, his jaw goes like a skeleton, like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, it's, like, if you just started yanking on the cord of a ventriloquist dummy up and down, that's his laugh.

[178] and it's kind of crazy, but because his character is such a crank, you don't get to see him lose it, but I had an experience where Dana Carvey famously does this thing that I absolutely love.

[179] We both are obsessed with it.

[180] We're both obsessed with it.

[181] And he's done it here, I believe, where he's Jimmy Stewart and he's in a car with Catherine Hepburn.

[182] He's trying to talk her into pledging him.

[183] But he also has very specific needs about how it should.

[184] I want you to act surprised when I take it out, but not too surprised, and he's very bossy about it.

[185] And it's, you're crying when you hear it.

[186] So Larry, I'm talking to Larry, and I do it for him.

[187] I said, this is Dana's thing, and I do it for him.

[188] And he was laughing as hard as I've seen him laugh.

[189] I'm going to die.

[190] Because his jaw was, and so then I see him a couple of days later.

[191] I run into him, and he went, oh, my God, I was at this party.

[192] And Bill Hater did Dana's thing.

[193] it's the hardest I've laughed.

[194] And I said, fuck you, Larry.

[195] That wasn't a party.

[196] That was my party.

[197] And I was doing it for you.

[198] And he was like, well, it seemed like aater.

[199] It was really funny.

[200] I think what happened was, also is that you do the Jimmy Stewart thing.

[201] And the thing I do of Dana's, which again is a Dana bit, is the Bert, Burnt Lancaster and Kirk Douglas having sex.

[202] And that's what I was doing.

[203] And so when I would do that, which, again, is Dana's bit.

[204] We're all doing Dana's bit.

[205] It's all doing Dana's bit.

[206] But when Dana Carvey did that for me once, and I fell on the ground, I was, yeah, well, just a couple of fellas.

[207] Ah, ha, ha, ha.

[208] Please, just a little more.

[209] Please.

[210] He's like, uh -huh.

[211] Don't worry now.

[212] Yeah.

[213] And I think, I want you to take it slow.

[214] I want you to take it slow.

[215] I want you to take it slow.

[216] And then the line that I always remember was Don't buck around now I don't have a lot of play down there And he It is an old Dina Carvey bit But when he did that I just When he came He hosted when I was a cast member SNL And when he hosted It did become a thing Where I would just ask him Well could you do this Or you could do this Or you could do it I mean I was just following him around Like yeah A puppy dog I was doing all the stuff that, you know, asking, asking about, you know, Phil Hartman's stories and, you know, everything, you know, that was the thing.

[217] Well, he is, um, fortunately that, that nice combo of one of the funniest people ever and also incredibly nice.

[218] Unbelievably, and kind and, uh, probably to a fault, people pleaser.

[219] But, yeah, we took Dana out to, uh, lunch.

[220] We were here at the studios and then we went, we did something and then we went next door to get lunch and a couple of writers came along.

[221] he put on a show for the writers and it very naturally but just was going through all kinds of stuff and he was doing uh henry fonda oh and uh it was so funny and afterwards the writers were thinking you know there's that dynamic that you hear about where the comedian is funny on stage but then if you see them off stage they're quite they're they can be quite dower and um you see that a bunch of times and then there are these people that just nope you can Sitting next to them on an airplane, and my wife and I once got on an airplane, and someone behind us was like kind of heckling me and talking about, oh, they'll let the Irish on this plane, and I guess they'll let any scum.

[222] What airline was it?

[223] Aer Lingus, that was the part that shocked me. Most to this airline, it's like, welcome to the airline.

[224] But it was sitting right behind us was Don Rickles.

[225] Oh, my God.

[226] And Don Rickles was, and then the whole flight, like cross -country was Don Rickles just peppering me with insults, but then telling great show business stories.

[227] And it was one of the highlights of my life, you know?

[228] Oh, man. I watch his stuff on YouTube all the time, him on Carson, him on all that stuff.

[229] I mean, his, did you see the one where he's on Letterman with Denzel Washington next to him?

[230] Oh, my God.

[231] Do yourself a favor.

[232] It's so, just that he was that age.

[233] I mean, he was really old.

[234] And when he would be on your show, he was hilarious.

[235] He's so fast.

[236] It's so fast.

[237] So insanely fast.

[238] Also, he had this knowledge of, you know, we all know there's this like weird line between music and comedy where somehow there's just things that sound funny and they work and you don't know why.

[239] And one of the things he discovered was someone would say something, he'd be like, that's right.

[240] You know, like almost as if to say, you know, what do you want to clap on the back?

[241] And you said, what do you want a cookie?

[242] Yeah, what do you want a cookie?

[243] He said, David Letterman goes.

[244] Frank Sinatra's wife's name's Barbara and your wife's name's Barbara, right?

[245] And he goes, what are you a detective?

[246] And he goes, what's up with these, what kind of question is there?

[247] He goes off on that question and just zeroes in on it and he's like, you make a billion dollars a year and you ask the most stupid question.

[248] And I, oh, it's the best.

[249] If you can find him with Dick Cavett in the early 70s, it's really, because Dick Cavett's trying to give it to him.

[250] I'm like, oh, I like your act, but I always did like Jackie Leonard.

[251] You know what I mean?

[252] And he's like, oh, all right, you know?

[253] Yeah, oh, you really want to, you really want to have a karate fight?

[254] It's like, Bruce Lee.

[255] It's like, all right, cool.

[256] And then it's fascinating to watch.

[257] It's on YouTube.

[258] It's really interesting where you could just tell he has zero, zero respect for him.

[259] When I was a kid, I watched old movies.

[260] Oh, yeah.

[261] Almost exclusively, and I'm bringing this up because I want to bring it around to Barry, which I'm just, I have to say, this is, and not just because we're friends or anything, it is, I think, the best show on TV.

[262] I absolutely love it.

[263] Nice you, man. Thank you.

[264] Now, keep in mind, I don't see a lot of stuff.

[265] And he's never seen this.

[266] I've never, yeah.

[267] I've never seen this.

[268] Yeah, I don't watch Barry.

[269] I've never seen Succession.

[270] Yeah, exactly.

[271] No, it is, I just love what you're doing with this show, and I know that this.

[272] season you directed every episode, I believe.

[273] Yeah, every episode.

[274] And so I kind of just wanted to go back for a second and think, you clearly are such a classic film buff, and it comes through in your choices as a director, and you take that really seriously, I know that, I think you were telling me once when you were a kid, you'd go over to sleepovers, and people thought, oh, these kids are probably watching, you know, pornography.

[275] Yeah, right.

[276] It's like, no, you were watching a clockwork orange or taxi driver.

[277] Yeah, I was watching taxi driver, yeah.

[278] Studying like studying the shots.

[279] Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[280] Yeah, no one was interested in that or I was like, see how the camera, it's like a subjective camera move.

[281] I got to go.

[282] They have those important.

[283] What the hell's wrong with you?

[284] Subjective camera move.

[285] What the hell are you in my house?

[286] The father comes in and tidy witties.

[287] I just hear subjective camera moves.

[288] Where the hell you come from?

[289] I want you to get out of my house.

[290] Looks like we got to say it was a film buff.

[291] No, but it was more nerve -wracking for that.

[292] No, but it was, yeah, you would watch that or watch old movies, and it's just what you were kind of interested in.

[293] It was, you know, what the thing that you can't describe, the thing that you're attracted to, that is what happens.

[294] And when I would watch movies, I remember, you know, my mom liked actors and things like that.

[295] And what always captured me was kind of the story or the way it was shot or the design of it.

[296] And just recently, you know, I have three daughters and I showed them a rear window.

[297] And it was fascinating because it started and they went, Dad, this is like old, you know, 13, 10, and 8.

[298] And they're just, this is boring.

[299] Why are we watching this, please?

[300] No. And then as it went on, they were getting more and more into it.

[301] And then it gets to this point, what is one of my favorite parts in any Hitchcock movie, if you can remember the movie where Grace Kelly goes and gets, she goes and gets in the Raymond Burr's apartment.

[302] Yeah, the killer's apartment.

[303] And he comes home.

[304] And then there's a great moment where she finds the wife's ring and she has the ring.

[305] And she's trying to show Jimmy Stewart across street like I found the ring.

[306] And then the camera pans up and Raymond Burr is seen that she's doing that and he looks right into camera.

[307] He sees, He sees Jimmy Stewart across the street.

[308] So he now knows I'm being watched and I now know what's happening.

[309] And when he did that, all three of my daughters just went.

[310] And I thought, okay, this guy made this in the 50s, early 50s.

[311] And there's just nothing that you can do whatever you want in movies, whatever.

[312] But if you have good storytelling and craftsmanship, this is what you get.

[313] It's timeless, you know.

[314] And it really made me, that's why I keep going back to those because it's just like it's just the bare bones craft of it.

[315] I love that you bring up showing these to your kids because it's, I always have, feel like I have so much on the line when I show these movies that I love to my kids, especially when they were younger, because if they weren't having it, I felt destroyed.

[316] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[317] But I showed them not too long ago, I showed them, um, uh, deep throat.

[318] No, no, yeah.

[319] Deep throat.

[320] Yeah, and you know what?

[321] It's got a lot of subjective camera moves.

[322] I don't remember this, kids.

[323] I don't remember this, kids.

[324] I don't remember this part.

[325] I'm sorry.

[326] I saw this in the theater.

[327] I was wearing an overcoat in the 70s.

[328] You couldn't get this stuff online back then.

[329] No, no. The Times Square doesn't look like Times Square looks like.

[330] Back then, it had a real life, you know.

[331] Subjective camera move.

[332] Look at all these subjective dolly.

[333] shots.

[334] Don't you think there are all those people like that purists that are still wearing a raincoat while they are on their computer watching porn?

[335] Like artisanal vintage joke?

[336] Yeah, yeah.

[337] They're just like, you know, this is how you do it.

[338] Yeah, and they're making their friends dress up like a nusher.

[339] Like, in 15 minutes, come in and kick me out of my room.

[340] Say, hey, hey, damn it.

[341] The flashlight, say, hey, knock it off.

[342] Yeah, this guy's spending thousands of dollars to hire people.

[343] Hipster masturbators.

[344] Yeah, yeah.

[345] Hipster masturbators.

[346] Right.

[347] What was the film you were going to do?

[348] Just so I can say it.

[349] Why am I blanking on?

[350] He gets dizzy when he gets...

[351] Oh, vertigo.

[352] I don't know.

[353] I'm old age.

[354] The one where he gets dizzy.

[355] Vertigo.

[356] What was the movie where you got dizzy?

[357] Mr. Showers.

[358] There's a shower movie.

[359] There's the shower movie.

[360] There's the shower movie.

[361] There's a dizzy movie.

[362] There's the one with a room.

[363] Then there's the, there's the, there's the, there's a shower movie.

[364] Piccaboo movie.

[365] I might see you across the street movie.

[366] I showed my kids vertigo with some friends of mine, and they're watching it.

[367] And at least they were old enough to appreciate, because I went on a riff at one point about, you know, because it's kind of crazy.

[368] Jimmy Stewart takes, takes this.

[369] It's kind of Dana's bit in a weird way.

[370] Beautiful blonde woman up in, yeah, up in this tower.

[371] And then, you know, she goes flying out of the tower.

[372] And so then he comes back later on to the same mission with a, uh, uh, uh, You know.

[373] Kim Novak.

[374] With Kim Novak.

[375] And I just do him running into a nun and saying, I'm just, we're going to get one more try here.

[376] You see.

[377] We're going to take a, and the nuns are like, no. No, no, no. No, no. You were here once with a blonde who looks exactly.

[378] She died.

[379] She died.

[380] No, no, no. I know, no, no, I know.

[381] I know, no, I know, I know.

[382] I saw, you know, with the flagpole one more time.

[383] I just, we probably think I'm some sort of a creep.

[384] And then I do him going after the second one like, I kind of landed in the same spot.

[385] The wind must catch.

[386] Oh, I get it.

[387] The wind catches her a bit.

[388] And right where the tiles meet the eaves, yeah.

[389] And my kids were like laughing at that.

[390] And I thought, okay, at least we have.

[391] It's all right.

[392] Yeah.

[393] It's okay.

[394] It's funny that, yeah, you try to watch those old movies and sometimes they work.

[395] But then, man, sometimes when my daughter had a big sleep.

[396] leapover with a bunch of friends, and I'm usually downstairs watching an old movie.

[397] They're upstairs, like, you know, whatever, singing karaoke and, you know, singing Katie Perry songs or whatever.

[398] And then they came down.

[399] I was watching this movie called Jeopardy with Barbara Stanwyg.

[400] It's basically a story about this couple and their child go to Mexico, and the father, play with Barry Sullivan, somehow gets stuck under, like, there's a dilapidated boardwalk, and he gets stuck under like a like a piece of it like a log and the tides rising so he's like you need to go get me help and so she leaves her son there she goes out to get help and she finds ralph meeker and she goes and you and he is an escape convict right so you're cutting back to barry selvin the water's up to his neck yeah and he's talking to his son going like don't worry son it's gonna be all right uh can you just sit your pants on fire son let's make a beacon and all this and then she's with this killer and my kids and then I turn around and like more of these kids are coming in behind me and they're watching it and they're just totally to go how's she gonna get back to the you know what I mean and I'm like it's that simple you know and I came into the edit bay the next day of Barry and I was like it really isn't that hard if you just can you know tell a good story right that's what it's going to be and so I get that's why I get very inspired by that stuff I have to say I had an interesting choice I had to make because I love Barry, and I've been waiting, I loved the way it wrapped up last season, and I was very much fascinated with what's going to happen.

[401] And usually what happens is you might get sent an episode, but I got sent almost all the episodes.

[402] Yeah, you got sent everything but the finale, yeah.

[403] And my pact with my son, who adores this show, loves it, and has great taste, is that we watch them together.

[404] And he has been unavailable, and I was like, I don't know.

[405] And also, I didn't want to cram.

[406] It was like this beautiful meal has been laid out that I'm looking forward to.

[407] You want it to last.

[408] You know, and so what I did was I decided I'll watch one and a half without my son, which I did.

[409] And then I will watch the rest of the season unfold.

[410] And I was, I trust you.

[411] I trust you guys.

[412] I know that you know what you're doing.

[413] But you have painted yourself into such an incredible corner.

[414] And I'm rhythm.

[415] I'm absolutely riveted.

[416] I loved it, and I love where it's going, but you've put Barry in this impossible situation, not just Barry, but I don't want to give anything away, but these characters are in this position where you think, I don't see a way out, just enthralled, just absolutely enthralled.

[417] Yeah, that tends to be what happens at the end of every season is we'll write it, and then at, you know, beginning of season three, I think my first day in the writer's room, I said, well, he needs to get caught.

[418] And so, you know, I think we're writing towards that.

[419] You know, I don't see how this can keep going.

[420] And then we did that.

[421] And speaking of Larry David, they saw Larry and he was like, watch Barry.

[422] That's it, right?

[423] I said, no, we have a whole other season.

[424] And he went, why?

[425] I go, well, I think there's more story to sell.

[426] And he's like, but it's done.

[427] This is because he ended Seinfeld with him all in jail.

[428] Yeah, right, right.

[429] He was like, hey, they're done.

[430] Yeah, and so exactly.

[431] I didn't think about that.

[432] That's true.

[433] Jail means it's over.

[434] Jail.

[435] I established that.

[436] It's like Monopoly.

[437] But he said, but he was, yeah, he was just, you know, we, so we have that.

[438] And so you start every writing session for season four.

[439] And this one was during the pandemic.

[440] Like the pandemic happened.

[441] We were two weeks away from starting to shoot season three.

[442] The pandemic happened.

[443] And when I went to HBO and said, it was okay if we just write season four.

[444] to have something to do.

[445] And then as we were writing season four, we started to go back to season three.

[446] And so I see three and four is kind of one big season.

[447] It kind of like it all kind of rolls into each other.

[448] But, you know, season four, yeah, you start off with him in jail and everybody he loves, hates him.

[449] And no one ever finds this stuff I find funny.

[450] This doesn't do anything.

[451] But the opening of the season is Barry calling Gene Kousineau.

[452] Yes.

[453] And the first thing he says was, did you trick me did you trick me and also he's such like a child he goes did you trick me and no one has ever laughed at that but me and Ali Greer the editor Frankie Gutman the other editor we are crying laughing at how he's like Homer Simpson we say that he has gotten progressively dumber he's got progressively dumber each season and so yeah we just you know you start with him there and then it just turns into like well, what would happen?

[454] What would you do?

[455] And the character is kind of really dictated.

[456] And so you kind of walk through all these steps and you take a lot of missteps.

[457] You go down avenues and it doesn't work.

[458] And from working, it started live for so long and doing this where it was such an immediate thing, what was so nice about the show is you could create something and feel like good and then walk away from it and then come back six weeks later and go, what the hell were we thinking?

[459] This has nothing to do with what the story is about.

[460] You know what I mean?

[461] It's more about this, isn't it?

[462] You know?

[463] And that was so helpful.

[464] So we had, you know, two years of being able to kind of percolate these ideas.

[465] And then even with that, you're still on set going.

[466] Duffy Boudreau, who's the co -writer and my oldest friend, we've been friends since high school.

[467] Yeah, he's, because he's been my friend for so long, you kind of know how it is where you're like, on set, my show.

[468] And so people are very nice.

[469] and I feel like I'm a very nice boss, but it is kind of like, you hear the, Bill's on set.

[470] You know what I mean?

[471] It's like, Bill's here.

[472] So it's like, you know, it's like, Conan's coming up to, Conan's cars here.

[473] trust me, there is none of that here.

[474] I assure you, there is no reverential.

[475] It's more like, oh, God, Conan's upset.

[476] Put on your listening here.

[477] Get ready to laugh.

[478] Put on your pretend happy face.

[479] No, but it is that when I show up as like, oh, you know, and so it is, everybody's kind of what I and it is nice to have your friend from high school there going like well that's dumb yeah you know what I mean yes or like I have there's a scene in this there's a little bit in the trailer so it always but there is a scene this season where Barry is at his lowest in the first episode where he's kind of at his lowest point he's in the bathroom and I kind of flip out in the bathroom that's a great scene very very intense the very intense yeah it was hard it was you know you're two cameras I'm directing it so So it's like, okay, we're with two cameras on me. I'm going to flip out and then we'll just keep going.

[480] And I'm going to hit a wall and we'll just keep going.

[481] And I do the first take and I'm feeling, wow, I really brought it, you know.

[482] That was really good.

[483] And the door opens and Duffy comes in and goes, a lot of acting, dude.

[484] And I go, what?

[485] I go, well, that's why it's called.

[486] You know, you get into like a fight like you did, like with your friend from high school.

[487] Well, that's what I'm doing, man. He's like, I don't, I mean, look, I'm from Oklahoma.

[488] What do I know?

[489] But it's just, it was a lot of like, oh, way, oh, way, oh, wait.

[490] A lot of like, hey, look at me, you know.

[491] And he just walked out.

[492] And so I got mad.

[493] And I'm like, all right, let's go again.

[494] And then I, in the scene, I start hitting myself.

[495] So the action, I'm looking at myself in mirror, and I start hitting myself.

[496] And behind the wall, I hear, there he is.

[497] Like, there you go.

[498] Come on, man. But he doesn't have any.

[499] Like, you know.

[500] There's no reverence.

[501] There's no reverence.

[502] There's no anything.

[503] It's like, come on, man. What are you doing?

[504] You know?

[505] And then Gavin Kleintop, our first AD and Iita Rogers, our producer, they got to that place, too.

[506] And that's infinitely helpful.

[507] And our editors are like that where I go, hey, you're not going to believe this scene we did.

[508] And they look at it.

[509] And they go, that's pretty corny bill.

[510] You know, and you need that.

[511] You need somebody to say, I just, this doesn't feel like the show, man. I don't know what this is.

[512] This reminds me of one of the time.

[513] that I think it was the first time Gary Shandling came on my late night show.

[514] We've been on for a couple of years and we'd gotten through the rough spot and things were really starting to jail and then I heard Gary was going to come on, which was just a huge, you know, thrill, never had met him in person and he came on the show and was fantastic.

[515] And then afterwards, he came into my dressing room and sort of shut the door like he just wanted to talk to me and see how I was doing and he said to me, well, how's the staff?

[516] How are you guys, you know, you feel good about?

[517] And I said, yeah, I do.

[518] I really have excellent people.

[519] And he said, do you feel like you have too many, like, yes men or something?

[520] And I said, Gary, I would kill for just one yes man. And he was laughing at that, but it was true.

[521] That's the kind of family I grew up in.

[522] There's not a lot of, I mean, people just sort of make jokes.

[523] And I know that we all love each other, but we make a lot of jokes.

[524] And so there's not a lot of, hey, I just have to tell you.

[525] Your work really inspires me. You know, that's not the environment.

[526] I would be comfortable in it.

[527] Just thinking about it.

[528] What if I said that to you?

[529] I was like, Conan, you really inspire me. Yeah, yeah.

[530] So good.

[531] I would say how much money did you get paid?

[532] Where's the camera?

[533] What's the joke?

[534] You really inspire me to do the opposite.

[535] To nap?

[536] You inspire you to nap?

[537] Yeah, that's what it's also the best thing that I've learned over the years when you're writing it and shooting it and then editing it.

[538] and it just keeps changing each time.

[539] And then what I always do, and it drives everybody nuts.

[540] But it's true is I'll sit down and say, okay, you just saw the latest episode of Barry.

[541] You go to a bar and you're sitting with your friend, and your friend goes, oh, you just watch the latest episode of Barry, yes.

[542] And they go, what's it about?

[543] What do you say?

[544] You know what I mean?

[545] And it's like, well, it's about a guy.

[546] And like that order and the information is how we should probably lay the story out.

[547] And it'll be interesting is they'll tell the story.

[548] and it's going smoothly and then you go that's great but you've never once mentioned Fuchs so we got to go back and make it so he's you can't talk about it without mentioning him you'll talk about the whole thing and like that's great but you never once mentioned Barry which happened season two we had a whole episode that I wasn't in and Alec Berg and I went you're not in the show it's my favorite episode yeah it's my favorite episode he goes you're in two scenes that's the only one I've seen oh yeah that's the Emmy winner I thought yeah I thought Henry was barry i'm buried people are always like what's it like working on henry winkler and it it really is all about the cake that he brings the set he just brings bunk cake i'm like henry you're losing your mind in this scene and you're on the verge and he's like and then after that can i give the the crew the bunk cake like robert wisdom's going to scream at you and make you cry and he's like right right well i have the coffee and the brunt cake right over and he has the There's a story about everything.

[549] Right over in this corner, you know, Jean Shalett attacked me. Or whatever it is.

[550] He wasn't attacked.

[551] He was one of the first celebrities I saw.

[552] When I came out to L .A. With Greg Daniels in 1985, we went to some thing.

[553] And one of the first celebrities, not the, but one of the first celebrities.

[554] And you have to remember, you guys are too young, but happy days in the 70s was the biggest thing in the world.

[555] and the Fonz was the biggest part of Happy Days.

[556] And, you know, in my school, in my English class, there was a big poster of the Fons on the wall.

[557] The teacher had put it up just to, like, try and pacify us.

[558] He was such a big thing.

[559] So I get to L .A. This will calm them down.

[560] This will calm them down.

[561] How do we calm these children down?

[562] Here's a picture of Abraham Lincoln.

[563] Here's one of the three stooges.

[564] Oh, no. The Fonz.

[565] Cool.

[566] Look at them, sir.

[567] But we went to some event and I couldn't believe it.

[568] But everyone was going to their cars and like this big, almost like a station wagon pulled up.

[569] The valets brought up a station wagon and it was raining really hard.

[570] And one of the windows had been left open.

[571] And Henry Winkler came out to claim the car and his wife was getting in the car.

[572] And he opened up the back seat.

[573] and he took like this big rag and started wiping the water off the back seat.

[574] And I thought, what's the Fawn's doing?

[575] He's some schlub wiping water off the back seat of a station wagon.

[576] Yeah.

[577] What happened?

[578] He jumped in the car.

[579] He quickly went, eight.

[580] It is him.

[581] No, he's the sweetest guy on the planet.

[582] Very nice guy.

[583] And so he's the guy that you can also, when I was, I would on set be kind of overwhelmed or whatever.

[584] he would always be like, I just want you to know you're doing a wonderful job.

[585] And he would walk away.

[586] That's so nice.

[587] That's sweet.

[588] My son and I are such Barry fanatics that we last year decided we need to go back and rewatch them all.

[589] We did that before the last season.

[590] So we went back and watched all of them.

[591] Again, what struck me was how there's an arc to the tone of the show.

[592] It's very organic.

[593] It's a compliment.

[594] But if you watch the first Barry second, very, third berry, it's much lighter.

[595] It's almost when you start down this path, and I was loving it, the tone starts to gradually change, but it's subtle.

[596] And now, if you look at where we are now, you can't believe the arc. You can't believe where you started, which to me is a real achievement.

[597] When you're writing it, you kind of start with this kind of idea that is kind of on the face of it could be a very kind of glib idea.

[598] idea and then when you try to do it realistically you kind of move on and then it's finding it and you go oh this is like you know this is the tone of the show and I think there was just some touchstones I mean one in season one was when Barry is in the car with his friend Chris and he has a choice to like kill him or not and he kills him and there's no joke after that and I remember being in the edit and going Alec Berg directed that episode and we were going the next scene is like a comedy scene you know what do we do to So let's just put it in there and see what happens.

[599] And it didn't hurt anything, you know, and it was like, oh, that's interesting.

[600] We can do that.

[601] So it was a bit like having some sort of machine that you went, well, it's still, we're still afloat, you know.

[602] We're on a boat and we're trying all these things and we haven't sunk yet.

[603] So let's try that.

[604] You know, we can go in that direction.

[605] But a thing I always thought of as we were moving forward was the movie Rosemary's baby, if you watch that movie, starts off very purposely like a Doris Day movie.

[606] Yep.

[607] It starts off.

[608] There's nothing overtly creepy about it.

[609] It's like a very nice couple buying a place, you know, at an apartment, you know, and at the Dakota and it kind of moves a forward.

[610] And then as it's happening, the tone starts to slowly shift, you know, in a way.

[611] And so that, that's always stuck with me in that to what you're talking about.

[612] But then I don't know about you, you've experienced this too.

[613] When you're writing something, you're kind of like, it's how you meet people, too.

[614] It's like we're writing the character and you're meeting all these characters, and it's how you meet somebody.

[615] It's kind of superficial, and you have your initial take on them or impression of them.

[616] And then as you hang out with them, you start to get to know them better, and they've just become, you know, slowly and increasingly more complicated, you know, and it's just trusting that.

[617] And then also, I think the other thing I'll say is when you're dealing with murder, it was very hard for me to be funny about it, you know?

[618] It could be strange, but it was hard for me to have someone get, you know, the Janice Moss character get killed and then kind of forget about it.

[619] And I was like, no, no, no, when she dies, it's for the whole show.

[620] Like, you can never forget about her every episode.

[621] She's mentioned, because I think that's what happens when someone loses somebody.

[622] And so you would be in the writer's room and everybody's going, well, it was a company, you know, and it was like, no, no, no. But we got to hold on to that.

[623] We have to hold on to that and just trust that it'll work.

[624] But also, is it a comedy?

[625] Why does it have to be a comedy?

[626] Yeah, that way is in their room.

[627] That's true.

[628] Yeah, I get, that's funny you say that because I just did it.

[629] But I do, Briss, I just, I've been doing a ton of press, so I'm a little tired.

[630] So why was the last piece of press you did?

[631] Literally, this is the last thing you want to do.

[632] No, no, I have more press.

[633] No, I have more press after this.

[634] Oh, I've done just about every shitty thing you can think of.

[635] Like, I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel.

[636] They reintroduced The shows that were canceled I went to I just did Regis I just did Regis I just went to Bonnie Hunt's house And said Bonnie let me tell you about Barry And she said I don't have a show And I was like listen Katie Couric She doesn't want to hear All these people They don't know They don't know me And said why didn't you get the episode I saw you on him I was on Hannity.

[637] I was like, look, look at my, look at me when you talk to someone.

[638] When you talk to a man, you look at him.

[639] No, but, but it is a thing you get a lot of, which is, is this a comedy or not?

[640] And it's like, ah, we're just telling a story.

[641] It's so funny because this season of Barry starts off in this very dark place.

[642] I'm not giving anything away, but at one point, point, Noho Hank is with his partner, and they have a cut to him, and he's wearing this hat and these glasses, and I lost it.

[643] It's such a funny, and I rose, and so to me, this idea that things can be incredibly dark, but then you can, and to me, it makes the funny, much funnier.

[644] Yeah, also, what we learned was that as long as it stayed within that character, where you would say well no ho hank this is what he would wear in santa fe yes yeah you know this is what he would want to wear that's what he's wearing which we always thought was very funny so it's always like when it comes out of honesty it kind of works and the things that wouldn't work was when we would i would you know hand of god you know comedy nerd try to come in and create something that wasn't coming organically out of a situation or the characters and that was usually the stuff we would lose quickly i've built a career on forcing it and i have to tell you I'm a big believer I think you're missing out Conan O 'Brien's new podcast Conan O 'Brien why'd your mind go there A new podcast Why am I talking like Jim Sinearly There's a reference Yeah there's a reference Jim Sineorelli did the All the films at S &L back in the day And what I remember it is that he wore his watch So that the face Face of the watch was on the wrist side Doctor style Yeah and I I never, and the band was really loose.

[645] And I remember thinking, I guess that's the way you're supposed to wear a watch.

[646] That's the way a director wears a watch.

[647] I don't think I had a watch then.

[648] Yeah, yeah.

[649] It was a swatch.

[650] And he shot, I remember he goes, here you're a film fan.

[651] He goes, I was the DP on Superfly.

[652] And he was.

[653] Well, I'm glad.

[654] I have a pact, which is anytime someone brings up Jim Signorelli, I have to wrap it up.

[655] Oh, yeah.

[656] The Signorelli lights on.

[657] Yeah, that's when Obama was here, and he was like, Jim Signorelli.

[658] was the inspiration first i remember the time i went down to pink's hot dogs that was a bit that mean that is still my favorite thing that fred and i would do is yeah Obama at the base of the capital records building just talking about his time in los angeles he's like i went down to pink's hot dogs where a writer from grace under fire said mr president what are we going to do about this wGA contract I was like, I went down to Venice Beach We're in the 60s A band taught us that if we work hard We can break on through to the other side Why is it that the more specific And impression is the better It was and that one thing was that he got to run background I went down to the set of two broke girls They let me run background Which is Fred did this And I fell out, he's like, it's when people are, you see the people in the background talking, now they're not allowed to speak.

[659] So you got to tell them, hey, you go in there.

[660] Now you come out.

[661] Now you're eating, you're drinking coffee.

[662] You two are married.

[663] Now you go in.

[664] No, you can't talk at the same time.

[665] I'm going to bring it back to Dana, which is he does, he does an impression of Obama pitching to Netflix.

[666] It was Obama pitching and all of his ideas are things they already have.

[667] So it's just as I was like, you know, well, I'm thinking of, a bunch of people vying for the, you know, they're vying for the throne of a, you know, and different kingdoms and stuff like that and they're trying, and it's sort of like they're all trying to get the throne and different families and there's rivalries and there's battles and a lot of sex and they just come off and they go, you know, Mr. President, it sounds a lot like and he's in the meeting with Mrs. Obama.

[668] And Mr. Obama that sounds a lot like Game of Thrones.

[669] Well, fuck me. Mish, what do you got?

[670] And that was my favorite part.

[671] Fuck me. Meesh, what do you got?

[672] Meesh, what do you got?

[673] Meesh, what do you got?

[674] Have you heard him do his thing, I guess he did, where he and I think it was Jan Hooks would, because at the table reads at SNL, Lauren Michaels has to read all the stage directions, yeah.

[675] And that they wrote a sketch that was called Mr. Poopi, and it was all stage direction, and they wrote it solely to hear Lauren be like, and Mr. Poopi walks into the thing.

[676] Mr. Poopi can't fucking thing.

[677] And then Mr. Poopie comes out.

[678] Mr. Poopi then walks in, he sees, he sees, so -and -so.

[679] He walks out, he sees the mailman.

[680] The mailman wants and says, hello.

[681] He gets in the car.

[682] Mr. Poopi now is in the car.

[683] They just were up late going out.

[684] I just want to hear Lauren have to read through all that.

[685] Mr. Poopi, say it 700 times.

[686] Yeah, he said Mr. Poopi like a hundred times.

[687] God, I would have been in there for that.

[688] I don't think I was, I was not there.

[689] I would remember that.

[690] Mr. Poopy did.

[691] He would always get, that was the worst, because Lauren, he would, he would kind of mumble.

[692] And then if you weren't paying attention, you would just hear, and then you'd say, and walk's bill.

[693] And you're like, oh, Jesus.

[694] And the read -through's been like two hours long.

[695] Yeah, and you're like, what?

[696] Oh, it's me. Oh, Jesus.

[697] Yeah, so.

[698] I remember the thing that made my soul die was if I'd written a sketch that all turned on one reveal, you've developed like a, you've made a 600 -mile -long, uh, string and you've hit in the first three fall but the fourth doesn't yeah and you know that this is going to last for eight more minutes and there's not going to be one single laugh it's the worst I really wish that there was a time you could just in those moments just say can we not do this yeah forget it forget it moving on moving on right yeah kill it kill it kill it because it's just like we had stuff like that happen all the time where it was just me and will forte uh I remember I wrote my first table read ever.

[699] We wrote a sketch called Emmy Attire.

[700] And it was me going, it was him, I'm trying to remember what it was.

[701] It was him in biking attire.

[702] And then I'm in the other room and I go, hey, you're ready to go to the Emmys?

[703] He goes, sure I am.

[704] And I go, what are you wearing?

[705] He's like, I'm wearing biking attire.

[706] What do you mean?

[707] You know, he's, you know, the helmet, the shorts, the fingers.

[708] those gloves, biking attire, and I go, go change.

[709] And he goes, why?

[710] And then I come out in biking attire.

[711] I go, because I'm wearing biking attire to the Emmys.

[712] I like that.

[713] And he goes, what?

[714] And then Jason Sadecas came in in Viking attire.

[715] And we were like, oh, this is very nice.

[716] Are you going to the Emmys?

[717] You know, he's like, you know, I thought you guys said biking attire.

[718] I thought you said Viking attire.

[719] And it was this whole thing.

[720] And I remember the end of the sketch was, it was like, this voice came in and goes, what you've just witnessed happened four years ago in my mind.

[721] And then the thing that said from the desk of Jimmy Carter.

[722] And it goes, hope you enjoyed it.

[723] And it was my first table read.

[724] And I just remember the look on Tina face, face was like, what the fuck was that?

[725] And I just was like, okay, all right.

[726] Well, I'm glad I could bring you here to bring back those lovely memories.

[727] Oh, my God.

[728] You know what?

[729] I'm just delighted to know you and to be friends with you.

[730] Thanks, man. You bring me so much happiness.

[731] And Barry, as I said, I watched the first episode and a little bit of the second one.

[732] And then I made myself stop because I'm watching these with my son.

[733] And it's really brilliant.

[734] Oh, thanks, man. I'm really proud of, I'm proud of you.

[735] Oh, thank you, Conan.

[736] That means a lot.

[737] Really does.

[738] That's crazy.

[739] No, I'm super proud of you.

[740] Thank you, man. Sadly, this must come to an end.

[741] We must stop because you're a busy man. And just I cannot thank you enough for doing this.

[742] I can't.

[743] Thanks, Conan.

[744] Thank you guys.

[745] This is always a pleasure to coming here.

[746] Thank you very much.

[747] Thank you for reading those kind words, just as we wrote them.

[748] I love you, Conan.

[749] Conan O 'Brien is loved.

[750] That should be the name of this podcast.

[751] Okay, well, take a moment here because congratulations.

[752] And felicitations are in order.

[753] Today is Matthew B. Gourley's birthday.

[754] I know B is not your middle initial.

[755] Nor is today my birthday.

[756] I thought you said today's your birthday.

[757] I just, no, someone said this episode was coming out on the 22nd.

[758] My birthday is the 23rd.

[759] Oh, well, what the hell, man?

[760] Right before we started, didn't you say this is coming out?

[761] You asked me when this is coming out.

[762] And I said on the 22nd, and then you go, that's my birthday.

[763] Week.

[764] Oh, come on.

[765] But that's what Conan's birthday was on.

[766] on the 18th, and we recorded it for the 17th.

[767] So it was like the same thing.

[768] It's not like we can't talk about your birthday.

[769] I didn't stop the whole momentum and the magic to point out a small accounting error.

[770] It is more or less your birthday.

[771] But now I started off with this feeling of generosity and everything, and now I don't have it anymore.

[772] Wait, I'm just, he's like, no, it's coming out the 22nd.

[773] My birthday is the 23rd.

[774] All right.

[775] Well, who's going to announce?

[776] that to America on the 23rd.

[777] You going on the Price is Right?

[778] What are you doing?

[779] That's exactly what I'm doing.

[780] I'm going on the prices right for my birthday.

[781] Okay.

[782] Have you been on the prices right?

[783] No, but I have been on more game shows than I'm a care to admit.

[784] Is that true?

[785] Yeah.

[786] When those people that just went from game show to game show?

[787] When I was younger, yeah.

[788] When I was younger.

[789] Yeah, well, I'm turning 50.

[790] I mean, come on.

[791] This is your 50th birthday tomorrow.

[792] Can we just say it's today?

[793] Also, people don't listen to podcasts necessarily on the day.

[794] telling me how podcasts well maybe as someone should wow they don't necessarily listen the day that they're put on air that's well you lost it you lost it's okay you tried no no no they don't you know what I mean this drops but then someone might be checking it out tomorrow and guess what if it's the 23rd then happy birthday Matt goarly thanks boss and it's the big 50 oh eh yeah that nothing yeah that ain't nothing I don't know what are you talking about I don't know I feel it 50 is, I mean, with all the advances in science and everything, 50's the new 49, 48, you know?

[795] You can't worry about it.

[796] I know that you're, first of all, you're a very youthful chap.

[797] You come across as very young.

[798] You were getting kind of upset when we'd mention your 60th birthday.

[799] Yeah.

[800] So you tell me. And I'm upset now that you brought it up again.

[801] I'm trying to get it out on Wikipedia that I'm 51 or 49.

[802] Okay.

[803] I'm also trying to get some other stuff out there too.

[804] What?

[805] That I was in porno for a while.

[806] Oh, in porno.

[807] He's porno.

[808] No, people who do porn, don't say I'm in porno.

[809] This was a long time ago when people said in porno.

[810] No, I think porno was in you.

[811] No, it was 1981.

[812] Oh, that's a good porno time.

[813] Yeah, I was going to say that's my favorite.

[814] And back then, we called it in porno.

[815] Did you?

[816] Sexy.

[817] Someone would say, hey, you, what's your score?

[818] And I'd say, I'm in porno, that's the game.

[819] That's how people talk back then.

[820] Wait, what were some of your movies?

[821] Oh, you don't want to know.

[822] I do want to know.

[823] Okay.

[824] Look out, unzipped.

[825] Oh!

[826] That doesn't feel like, look out, because here comes something sexually formidable.

[827] It feels like, look out, you're in danger.

[828] Look out, unzip was one of my best -selling movies.

[829] So, yeah, I'm trying to get that on the internet.

[830] What was the plot?

[831] What's that?

[832] What was the plot?

[833] Oh, there's this guy, and he goes to get his zipper fixed.

[834] He wears these really tight corduroy pants.

[835] And this guy's packing, let me tell you.

[836] Is there any sex?

[837] in it at all?

[838] I wouldn't call it sex.

[839] What would you call it?

[840] But there is an extended segment where the just the penis just keeps coming out and out and out.

[841] Oh, come on.

[842] It's like a magician would pull scarves out of their mouth?

[843] Well, that's it.

[844] It's a scene where he's wandering the earth trying to find, you know, a way to make a living.

[845] And then he teams up with a magician at one point.

[846] And the guy's pulling out, you know, and pulling and pulling and pulling and it just keeps going.

[847] And it's called, look out on zip.

[848] Look out on zip.

[849] Well, look for it.

[850] And then there's a little, you know the way sometimes just a title underneath.

[851] A little, it's thwabida, habita, hoboda, habita, hauberta, hubba, dobutta.

[852] Thwabada, habutta, hubba dobuta.

[853] Oh, twice, or is it just the one thwabba.

[854] Depends on which country it's released it.

[855] I've seen ones that were, you know, I saw a copy that was being sold in the Canary Islands.

[856] It's thwabada, wabada, hobbitah, hubba daibada, dibut.

[857] Okay.

[858] But it depends on where you get it.

[859] But all of this is my way of saying, happy 50th birthday, Matt Gorley.

[860] And you know what?

[861] you should feel grateful you have beautiful wife you have lovely daughter and a gorgeous home I mean and you get to work with Sona and Conan and that's a pretty rare yeah I get to work with Sona and Conan and Sona and Conan and Sona buddy just the three together that might get well two pals and another guy I'm gonna go sit on that two legged stool and see how that Is that another one here in pornos?

[862] Yep.

[863] Well, that was one -legged stool.

[864] That's the other one I made, which didn't do as well.

[865] People were disappointed in the ending.

[866] One -legged upside down stool.

[867] Where I'm just sold as a stool.

[868] Oh, God.

[869] And then I'm just a long sequence of me, erect.

[870] And people are having coffee using my back as a table.

[871] And I'm at a French cafe.

[872] And they're on really tall stools because.

[873] That's Guys, you're like packing, yeah.

[874] Yeah, this is all true.

[875] Oh, my God.

[876] You know, maybe this is a great birthday present for you.

[877] No, it's not.

[878] Yes, you can gather the wife and daughter around the radio that plays podcasts.

[879] No. And you can listen to this wonderful memory.

[880] I'm going to salvage this by drinking out of Javier Bardem's cold coffee cup.

[881] Ah.

[882] No, there you go.

[883] Now that's a birthday.

[884] I can savor.

[885] Yes.

[886] Fairness.

[887] Well, happy birthday.

[888] Happy birthday, thanks, you guys.

[889] Thanks, we all did.

[890] Play, would it kill you to lean into the mic and say, happy birthday?

[891] Happy, well, he told me it was the 22nd.

[892] I know, but so what?

[893] We let that go.

[894] You're still nursing that?

[895] Happy birthday.

[896] Jesus.

[897] It seems like there are qualifications to that.

[898] I don't accept your happy birthday.

[899] All right.

[900] Well, as long as we ended in bitterness.

[901] Let's get out of here.

[902] Conan O 'Brien needs a friend.

[903] With Conan O 'Brien.

[904] Ryan, Sonomofsessian, and Matt Goreley.

[905] Produced by me, Matt Goreley.

[906] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Nick Liao, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf.

[907] Theme song by The White Stripes.

[908] Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.

[909] Take it away, Jimmy.

[910] Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples.

[911] Engineering by Eduardo Perez.

[912] Additional production support by Mars Melnik.

[913] Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and brick con. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode.

[914] Got a question for Conan?

[915] Call the Team Coco hotline at 323 -451 -2821 and leave a message.

[916] It too could be featured on a future episode.

[917] And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.