Stop Holding Back—Unlock Your Potential NOW!

[0] Hello, everybody, and welcome to The Advisor with Stacey Chalemi.

[1] And today I'm very excited because we have a very special guest on this show.

[2] We have Matt Travasso, and he is an amazing author.

[3] and coach.

[4] And he recently authored his book that he's going to talk about today.

[5] And it's an amazing book because it's called, it's about unlocking your potential.

[6] It's something that's very important because we all have something special within us and we all have the potential to become the best version of us.

[7] And he's going to tell you his own version of what he feels unlocking your potential means and how you could do it and apply it in your daily life to make yourself the best version of you.

[8] Matt, it is a pleasure.

[9] to have you on the show today.

[10] I'm so excited, you know, to work with you.

[11] You had mentioned that you worked with Tony Robbins.

[12] You coached with him and you've done many things in the past to help others, you know, improve their lives.

[13] And I'm just honored to have you on the show and have you share your own experience with us.

[14] Now you talk about unlocking your true potential.

[15] And, you know, I, for me, my first question is, you know, What got you to that point where you felt like that you became so passionate about unlocking your potential?

[16] Because when we do things in life, especially as coaches, we usually do, we share messages that mean something to us, that are important to us.

[17] And there's usually a story behind that.

[18] So what's your story?

[19] Why are you so passionate about teaching others how to better themselves, how to unlock their potential, how to be the best version of themselves?

[20] Hi, Stacey.

[21] I'm very happy to be here.

[22] And yeah, the reason, the story behind this book and the way I decided to write Unlock Your Potential, there wasn't any specific situation or event, but it was always a great...

[23] interest, passion, desire to find out about the human brain, how our minds work, how to get the best out of ourselves.

[24] And of course, I just wanted to be the guinea pig of the situation, so to speak.

[25] And I wanted to see if this stuff out there...

[26] coaching and different therapies, whether they actually did work.

[27] And I found and I utilized many different approaches, especially neuro -linguistic programming for many years.

[28] And actually, I went through experience of being very excited about the power, for example, of neuro -linguistic programming for many years, especially during the 90s, 2000s.

[29] But then over the last, I would say, at least a good 10 years, I realized that there is something deeper than just these behavioral techniques.

[30] and tools, even cognitive behavior therapy that are too superficial to me, even though they can lead to results.

[31] They're not as deep as when you actually have your own experience, your insightful experience.

[32] You have an insight from within and you see things from a whole different perspective.

[33] And whilst we're talking about changing one's life, changing behaviors, when you realize that it's all created by you, even in the feeling to begin with, but at the core, meaning that what we think shapes, forges our experience, which is where I am right now.

[34] Finally, after many years of exploring, of explorations.

[35] And that gives you so much choice and power in knowing that your experience is yours.

[36] And it is very fluid.

[37] So that's my style of coaching these days.

[38] So that's a long, pretty long.

[39] answered the question, which is essentially a great desire to find out how to utilize the miracle, the mystery, the magic of being human, not just from a behavioral or purely psychological level, but also, I would say, also spiritual level.

[40] And when I say spiritual, I mean energetic level.

[41] Yes.

[42] Aware, fully aware, fully conscious of being at one with everything.

[43] Right.

[44] When we actually, when we appreciate this reality, this truth, everything gets to be simpler and easier, navigating through life's storms and challenges and situations.

[45] it becomes easier and easier.

[46] I love that.

[47] You know, it's so true.

[48] We do have a very superficial way of thinking in our society because we have been bombarded with tools and strategies and techniques and different, you know, therapies that we could, you know, and that we could do this way and this will help us with this and this will help us with this.

[49] And, you know, a lot of it is the same thing, but it's just.

[50] Each person has their own unique way of exemplifying it and doing it with their clients.

[51] But you went a step further.

[52] You went within yourself and you had that wake -up call.

[53] You were able to go within yourself and actually connect with your inner self.

[54] You were actually able to find that energy within you.

[55] connect with that energy, and then come to realizations that you didn't have before about yourself.

[56] And you were able to unlock the potential through that.

[57] Now, for you, what was that wake -up call like?

[58] Because, you know, a lot of people for years and years, they try to, they can't, they can...

[59] you know, solve problems temporarily.

[60] They could use therapies to help them through situations.

[61] But when it comes to really going deep down within themselves and connecting with themselves and understanding what makes them tick and why they tick the way they do, you know, that's not an easy task because you really have to, there's a process to that.

[62] For you, how did you connect with yourself and what was the process to get you to that actual level where many people would just die to get to that level and and and be able to unlock that energy and that potential within yes that's a very good question stacy excellent um my process um since you used that word specifically, and it's a good word, it's appropriate, was that initially at the beginning, I'm also a psychologist as well.

[63] So sometimes coaches are not, and they don't have to be a psychologist at all.

[64] Like, for example, you mentioned Tony Robbins that I worked with.

[65] He doesn't even have a degree, but he's really good.

[66] In his own way of...

[67] He has a beautiful style like Marshall Goldsmith.

[68] I work with Steve Hardison, very different styles.

[69] Initially, let's say when I started, I made everything very complicated.

[70] Also, perhaps maybe unconsciously was a way to make me feel really important and also maybe to people as well.

[71] And if I could.

[72] if I were complicating, making everything very complex.

[73] Yes.

[74] So through the years, I simplified, simplified, simplified everything big time.

[75] And what allowed me to really dance.

[76] With life, with universe, with the emotions, because, you know, a big thing in training, in psychotherapy, in psychology, in NLP is always about dealing with emotions.

[77] Yes.

[78] It's about, you know, in NLP is manipulate the emotions because you can use this technique and.

[79] For a time, they can work.

[80] And sometimes even for a long time.

[81] But you are left with the idea that you changed thanks to a technique.

[82] Yes.

[83] Which is not true with a capital T. It's not.

[84] And therefore, you know, I lost the taste.

[85] for these fabrications.

[86] And I wanted the truth, I wanted to go to the source.

[87] So I realized that all the emotions that I was after, that I wanted to experience, I already had them.

[88] It was, I came with all the, I came here to this world with all the emotions I could possibly wish.

[89] desire want to experience i already have them as part of the factory settings factory settings already pre is innate yes innate like you know uh like like babies for example don't need therapy yeah you look in a in a baby's uh in a newborn especially you know in a baby's eyes and you see pure bliss yes they are in a state of natural constant well -being except for those times when you know physical discomfort maybe they need changing or they're hungry but other other than those times they're you know they're they're they're actually navigating very well yes and uh and so i just uh i i just uh i just let's say um i instead of finding weapons to deal with life I actually I dropped them all I dropped them all and trusted yes trusted the universe big time because I realized that it was my extension and because there was also actually there was a time when I was actually dealing with I call it like a dragon a dragon inside Sometimes we actually have to deal with something inside.

[90] And I was trying to tame the dragon.

[91] And it was hard.

[92] It was hard and exhausting.

[93] And I wasn't doing very well.

[94] And I remember I was in London in Greenford Park.

[95] I was going to the university and I said, you know, this fight is really draining all my energy.

[96] I was always so wiped out because of this constant fight.

[97] which was internal, inner civil war, which was going on for weeks and weeks and weeks, at least a month and a half to two months.

[98] Then finally, I surrendered to the dragon with a great wish, a dream, an idea.

[99] And I said, I was like, if instead of fighting with this dragon, we became friends.

[100] I just, you know, just slightly entertaining the idea.

[101] I got so excited, so turned on, so in ecstasy, lit up like a Christmas tree, and it happened.

[102] It happened and I was riding the dragon.

[103] He was so happy.

[104] I was happier than the dragon itself.

[105] Yeah.

[106] And I never turned back and we just, you know, I sailed through the park to the university.

[107] I was a changed man. Right.

[108] And I could say that then, you know, everything has been rosy ever since.

[109] But then there were other, not as...

[110] not as major, but other shifts that I've had since that time.

[111] So, you know, that was a great glimpse, a great message that told me that the best way to deal with emotions, because sometimes when we actually want to always be in a good state all the time, you are setting yourself up.

[112] for a lot of stress and frustration and you're not doing well.

[113] And because also you have this fear.

[114] It was not conscious, but unconsciously, you know, looking back with hindsight, I can say that there was an unconscious anxiety about not being totally in control.

[115] of my emotions, of my feelings, of my, oh my God, wow.

[116] That would be something unbearable.

[117] But ever since I started opening up and saying yes to whatever happens, all the defenses dropped.

[118] All the anxiety lessened.

[119] Big time.

[120] And that doesn't mean that there won't be difficult moments, difficult times.

[121] There will be, but you deal with them as they arise and they're never as bad as the one you create inside your mind.

[122] Yes, it's true.

[123] It's so true.

[124] You said some really great pointers right here.

[125] You know, first of all, the one thing you said in the beginning was that.

[126] So many people complicate things because they, too, it's true.

[127] People, sometimes they feel more important, smarter if they make things seem so complex.

[128] And, oh, look at me. I have this, you know, large idea.

[129] And instead of just writing five points, five bullet points, it turns out to be like, you know, 10 pages worth of material.

[130] And anyone that looks at it is going cross -eyed.

[131] We don't have to make life so complicated.

[132] You're sometimes smarter if you make things more simpler.

[133] And then you also have more success.

[134] The simpler you can make things, the less stressful it is for you.

[135] The less stressful, the more clarity you have, the more focus you have.

[136] And you'll probably enter the world of success at a better rate than you would if you try to make things so complex and try to impress others with your level of intelligence that you're trying to prove to people that you have.

[137] Just make life simple.

[138] And that could be sometimes hard.

[139] hard to do for people because people you know I know so many people that do that you know and it's just like and you'll meet many doctors too they will talk you know in medical terminology and they'll be talking to a group of people that are on an eighth grade level you know and you know and people will just look at them and they'll be you know dumbfounded And, you know, all you had to do is say, well, if your spine is out of alignment, then, you know, you're going to have back pain.

[140] Instead, they go through all this, you know, they go into all these scenarios and theories and this and that.

[141] And you lose people that way.

[142] Now, when you have, when it comes to simplicity.

[143] Is there a good way to teach people how to take their world that they see?

[144] So sometimes really complicated because life is full of obstacles.

[145] Not everyone knows how to deal with obstacles well.

[146] How do you learn how to break obstacles down?

[147] Now, is it what you just said to focus on the present and not worry in your head about what is not even present yet?

[148] Ways to all.

[149] So would you rephrase the question, please?

[150] Sure.

[151] The first thing, many people look at life difficult in a difficult manner.

[152] They complex things.

[153] So if we want to, you know, a lot of people don't know how to make life simple for themselves.

[154] What are some strategies in your own way, you know, that you can teach people how to make things a lot simpler for themselves?

[155] Yeah.

[156] Sure.

[157] Yes.

[158] I think that people know how to make it simpler if they really wanted to.

[159] So sometimes so I started using, as I told you, from, you know, I've been doing it.

[160] I've been coaching people for the last 27 years.

[161] And as the years go by, the approach and the style gets simpler and simpler and simpler.

[162] And now these days I use few techniques.

[163] And it's all like 90 % of the magic happens through presence.

[164] And meaning like, you know, the connection, the interaction, the visually seeing and perceiving and sensing things.

[165] But yeah, anyway, you know, so what I'm saying is that as far as techniques to help people simplify, you know, they would like to transfer, to teach, to do in their lives.

[166] If we inspired them, you know, I find that, for example, there's a great quote by Einstein, which is very powerful.

[167] He says, if you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough.

[168] This is very provocative.

[169] This is very provocative.

[170] If you can't say it, if you can't describe it, if you can't explain it simply, it means that it's still not clear to you.

[171] You're still confused.

[172] You don't know it well enough.

[173] And that should push.

[174] and force.

[175] In other words, make people find a way to simplify things so that, you know, because it's like saying that you actually know what you're talking about.

[176] There's a great quote by Leonardo da Vinci, and he says, simplicity is the highest form of sophistication also.

[177] That's a beautiful line.

[178] So if people are inspired, I think, you know, anybody can find a way, or, you know, if you can actually, just ask somebody, you know, if you were to teach it to a 12 -year -old, What would you say?

[179] It's a great question.

[180] And people will come up with something.

[181] And if it's still complex, you tell them, a 12 -year -old?

[182] You would say that to a 12 -year -old?

[183] Really?

[184] Yeah.

[185] Yes.

[186] So, right.

[187] So I think that people are more creative than they give themselves credit for.

[188] Right.

[189] And also, you know, these are things that they make up in their mind.

[190] I'm not creative enough, but it's very it's all.

[191] It's all it's all a thought.

[192] It's some thinking that they have that leads them to think like that.

[193] And then, you know, of course, that through time and repetition and persistence in that thought, it becomes a belief.

[194] So it's like it's rooted.

[195] But, you know, if we realize that it's still a thought at the basis, then, you know, we are back.

[196] in the fluidity of the world, of ourselves, which is essentially what we are.

[197] Yes.

[198] So that fluidity and trusting in something greater than ourselves helps people to reconnect to this great power that we all have within.

[199] Yes.

[200] and find all the resources we need to do whatever we need to do.

[201] And if that simplifies something, we find a way to do just that.

[202] I love that.

[203] No doubt about that.

[204] Yes, no doubt.

[205] No doubt at all.

[206] Now, when it comes to unlocking our potential, if you were to teach someone how to unlock their potential, How would you go about, you know, if someone says, well, you're telling me I have potential, that I'm more creative than I think I am.

[207] I have, you know, there's plenty of potential within me. How do I unlock my potential?

[208] What is my potential?

[209] Right, right.

[210] The simplest way, where since we're talking about simplicity now, let's keep it simple.

[211] The simplest way is being spontaneous.

[212] In fact, we were talking just before we started this podcast that we were talking about, you know, the key is being yourself.

[213] You know, absolutely.

[214] That is truly the key to life, to success, to happiness, to inner peace.

[215] Peace of mind, tranquility.

[216] So if we are, when we are ourselves, we can access all the, I think, potentially all the resources of life itself.

[217] Yes.

[218] But anyway, a lot more than we need for the task at hand, for sure.

[219] Yes.

[220] And yes, and also, you know, people can actually complicate the idea of being yourself.

[221] What do you mean being yourself?

[222] What do I have to do?

[223] What's step one?

[224] Yes, yeah.

[225] If you want to complicate things, you always find a way.

[226] You know, your mind is incredible.

[227] You want to make things complicated?

[228] Sure.

[229] Here's a thousand ways to make things complicated.

[230] Then, you know, just, you know, spontaneity is a beautiful word, being spontaneous, because, and especially enjoying what you are doing, doing what you love, what juices you, what turns you on, what excites you, what lights you up you know what fascinates you what gives you energy what energizes you yes that automatically allows you to again access your genius yeah the best in yourself and so we access that by being ourselves, by being spontaneous, by doing what we most enjoy, what excites us, what turns us on, what we really love to do.

[231] And that's a beautiful thing, because as we all know, that becomes joy, becomes fun, becomes pleasure, becomes truly pure joy.

[232] And that may very well be your work.

[233] Yes.

[234] But when you're loving it, you are doing it very well because that's what happens when you love what you do.

[235] You're bringing your best resources available and you...

[236] You don't get tired.

[237] You can do it for hours and hours.

[238] Time flies.

[239] And then what do you want to do?

[240] You want to do it more and more.

[241] And the more you do it, the better you get.

[242] And the better you get, the more skilled you become at that.

[243] Of course, the better the results that you produce.

[244] And the results, as they get bigger and better and greater, They motivate, they inspire you to spend even more time in that experience, activity, occupation, behavior, work, profession, whatever.

[245] So that's a beautiful, virtuous cycle.

[246] And it gets better and better.

[247] That's why they say...

[248] So I just say the richer get richer and the poorer get poorer.

[249] The worse it gets, the worse it gets, the better it gets, the better it gets.

[250] Yeah.

[251] It's a virtuous cycle.

[252] So that's why in many ways, from this perspective, in this way, as we are framing success, it's easier to succeed than to fail.

[253] Yes.

[254] Because succeeding means doing what you love.

[255] Doing what inspires you.

[256] Doing what fascinates you.

[257] And no matter what, you're winning all the time.

[258] I know that it's an old concept, but it's old and it's cliche because it's true.

[259] Yes.

[260] I know that people these days in the States are very focused on real...

[261] A lot of money, $100 million, a billion.

[262] I know.

[263] It's like there's a lot of cash these days.

[264] And so everybody's just, you know, the economy is skyrocketing, is exploding.

[265] There are challenges ahead.

[266] I don't want to be negative, but we know that there are going to be challenges in the market.

[267] Yeah.

[268] But, you know, that's...

[269] And it's great, you know, if people are inspired by material goals.

[270] So great.

[271] Just, you know, be honest with yourself.

[272] You don't have to apologize.

[273] Just, yeah, go all in and do what you are called to do, driven to do.

[274] Absolutely.

[275] The only thing is that, you know, we know that.

[276] happiness and that's you know the essence uh or one of the main themes of this book unlock your potential since you know that was one of the questions so uh the main um probably yes the main message is that feelings are not a direct consequence of circumstances okay so you can have great circumstances and people take their own life yes and and you can have a standard on common average circumstances and you can have people who are over the moon who are absolutely beyond um fulfilled and or serene or in peace or happy, truly, truly happy.

[277] Yes.

[278] And some people who are, you know, have a ton of money, billions, and they're also very happy as well.

[279] So, hey, absolutely great.

[280] And but do not let's not assume that the circumstances cause or determine.

[281] our feelings.

[282] That is so valuable.

[283] Now, sure, as far as money and happiness are concerned, no big deal.

[284] Sure, let's go for both.

[285] Yeah, I'm for that.

[286] Absolutely.

[287] But I also know that the two are in two different planets.

[288] This is especially useful when people are dealing with challenges.

[289] And that's something that we can call a given in life.

[290] That's something that everybody goes.

[291] There is no human who doesn't go through some challenges.

[292] Yes.

[293] But if we realize, if we know really we have an embodied understanding.

[294] sense of way of knowing if we know that the two are separate the circumstances mean nothing are neutral until and unless we have a thought we think about the circumstances then we realize that it's not the circumstances per se making me feel the way I feel but the thinking that i have that is making me feel the way i feel and i can do a lot about that i can do a lot about my thinking if i know that is my thinking the true cause of why i feel the way i feel yes i can do a lot but if i think it's the circumstances i'm in trouble And I'm going to cause lots of troubles.

[295] Maybe I think it's those people.

[296] Then I'm going to go to those people and say, hey, stop making me feel like this.

[297] It's not them.

[298] So you're actually going.

[299] But many people, I would say most people think that circumstances are the culprit, the cause, responsible.

[300] They never are.

[301] So that helps.

[302] that allows you to navigate life's storms and challenges very serenely, taking things in stride, staying centered and keeping your emotional stability.

[303] That is huge.

[304] That's really huge because most people do think it's the circumstances, but it really is.

[305] You know, as you say that, when you think about that, it is, it's the thoughts that we have in our head that's causing us to feel the way we feel, not the circumstance.

[306] But the tricky question is, is that how do you get that person to switch their thoughts?

[307] Because a lot of people have a hard time.

[308] letting go of those thoughts.

[309] They repetitively think things over and over.

[310] And then they create scenarios in their head of what could be in the future.

[311] And their brain takes over and it takes over their entire way of their mental health.

[312] It affects their physical health.

[313] It affects their spiritual growth.

[314] It affects their business.

[315] How do we let go of these negative?

[316] thoughts in our head and reconstruct them to be more positive and so we are able to actually change our thoughts are into positive that things that are going to lead us to positive you know emotions so we can look have a different outlook of what's going on in our world stacy great question great question great question and that is the level at which all the self -help books talk about and tell you to do change your thoughts change your life there are so many books with that title same title change your thoughts change your life i don't know how many hundreds of books have the same title they don't actually sue each other hey that was my title but never mind that's all right now it's like who knows everybody who's the author everybody Well, not me, because I transcended and I was there for many years.

[317] And yes, you can do that.

[318] And for a time, it may work.

[319] And at least you convince yourself you're into this, you have this illusion.

[320] that you know something is working okay i convince myself i repeat the affirmations don't say those negative words those negative sentences instead say these positive phrases yeah right yeah right it's not my start and since we realize we agree that thought has a lot to do.

[321] And as I said earlier, it is the magic secret, the missing link, the greatest power in the world that shapes, creates, forges, and really fashions, creates our experience.

[322] And there's a great quote that says, thought is not reality, but it is through thought that reality gets created.

[323] Yes.

[324] And so it's behind everything.

[325] The things that we are experiencing and we think they're solid, they're things of the world, then we realize they're not.

[326] They're just creation in our own mind.

[327] Returning, coming back to your question, the key is to catch that happening, is to at least catch a glimpse of the fact that it is our thought that is creating all these illusions, all these experiences that we are having, that we think they're coming from outside.

[328] They are not.

[329] And that is our power.

[330] It's not in changing our thoughts, but in seeing how thought creates our reality.

[331] When we see thought in action, we are waking up to the magic of being human.

[332] Because it's a pretty big deal being human, really.

[333] The human mind is incredible.

[334] And he tricks us and he tries to trick us all the time.

[335] And there's a great quote by renowned physicist David Bohm.

[336] He says, thought creates the world and then says, I didn't do it.

[337] Thought creates the world and then says, I didn't do it because thought is behind everything we experience, good and bad.

[338] Oh, there's a great quote by John Milton that says, the mind can make a heaven of a hell and a hell out of a heaven.

[339] William Shakespeare, nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.

[340] Yeah, you know, one, you know, but making a heaven out of a hell and a hell and vice versa.

[341] That is like, yeah, wow.

[342] And you realize that very often, you know, you are, you know, I remember, you know, a friend of mine and I was I've been in Hawaii several times and I always had a great time personally.

[343] But I remember a friend of mine with his girlfriend, he was having the worst time.

[344] Ever.

[345] The worst time.

[346] They were always fighting.

[347] And it was like, gosh, we are, you know, I spent a fortune.

[348] We are in Maui.

[349] This beautiful hotel.

[350] And, you know, they were fighting for a variety.

[351] So, yes.

[352] And also, you know, another example that allows us to see that it's not the circumstance, but it is our thinking.

[353] We've all found ourselves thinking about maybe a trip.

[354] uh planning um or a job interview or a presentation and when we you know we think about it say well it's cool and then new thoughts new data new information comes to mind and we are not as okay about that situation About which we were very okay a few minutes, a few moments before, earlier.

[355] What changed?

[356] The situation didn't change.

[357] It hasn't even happened yet.

[358] But the way we relate to it, new data have come up to consciousness.

[359] And now we are aware of it that we weren't thinking about.

[360] And now perhaps we are anxious or vice versa.

[361] Yeah.

[362] So it's never the situation, the problem.

[363] It's always our thinking.

[364] So back to, you know, once again, how do we simplify it and make it more practical?

[365] The key is to catch.

[366] And we become good with practice at catching thought, our thinking, whilst it's doing it.

[367] Doing what?

[368] creating the experience that we're having and if it's a you know if it's not a good experience and also for the also for the good experiences and the great and the not and the not so good experiences thought is always behind them all but of course you know we don't actually have to help the situation when we're feeling great that's okay all right even though you know it's still a thought yes behind it doing all the magic but you know you know people don't need help when they're feeling great yeah it's when they're not feeling so good that they need help and trying to change their thinking at that time is still better than not doing that and focusing on the negative for sure yeah but the best thing is when you realize that it's just thought, it's just a thought, and by its very nature, it is transient.

[369] It is temporary.

[370] Yes.

[371] It is ephemeral.

[372] It's about to go.

[373] As soon as we remind ourselves and because we see, oh, it's just a thought, then it's already like the cloud.

[374] In between you and the sun and you think, where has the sun gone?

[375] The sun has disappeared.

[376] No, because if we actually, you know, take a face value, the fact that there's no sun because there are the clouds.

[377] But if I don't realize that it's just the clouds and I think, OK, the sun is gone, I might freak out.

[378] But if I know that it's just the cloud that will soon pass, I'm not bothered.

[379] yes i know that uh yeah sun is there sun maybe metaphorically well -being yeah well -being never leaves you it's within yeah it's us well -being love that's what we are at our core our essence yes once when we when we remind ourselves of that that we have innate innate well -being innate health then any temporary negative feelings, we don't take them so seriously.

[380] We don't give them so much power.

[381] We don't see it as truth, meaning like it's not an objective reality because it's not, like I said earlier, thought is not reality, even though it is through thought.

[382] that our reality gets created personally, because we humans have no way to experience reality in terms of objective reality.

[383] We have no way.

[384] We only have it.

[385] subjective, unique, subjective perception of reality.

[386] We only have a perception, your perception, my perception of reality, your perception of reality is different to mine.

[387] Maybe, maybe similar.

[388] Sometimes I tell my clients, you know, when they're talking about somebody else, imagine seeing, imagine seeing the world from their, not just point of view, being inside their brain.

[389] yeah inside their brain like whoa that would be a mind -blowing experience yeah no one has said no one has and i asked that you know i just invited people to to do this experiment many many many hundreds of times not one person has said oh yes you know i would see the world the same way no one Get it.

[390] They get it when you make it so practical that if I actually were inside their brain, so immediately they see that they realize that we don't actually have these eyes that objectively allow us to see the world as it actually see.

[391] The brain never see the world, never see the world as it really is.

[392] Yes.

[393] Because it's always filtered by through our beliefs.

[394] our subjective experiences, our values and so forth, our memories.

[395] Yes.

[396] So we all have a different, especially, you know, with the stuff that it is, you know, intangible.

[397] Like, are you successful?

[398] Are you happy?

[399] Yeah.

[400] How fluid is that?

[401] are you creative like we were mentioning are you compassionate someday well yeah are you empathetic are you loving you know that's the stuff are you confident yes that's the stuff that people care about right but even you know if we were talking about an iphone or a pair of shoes or a dress even though that's tangible We might have different tastes.

[402] Yes.

[403] Even with things that are just like, you know, a tree, you know, people might actually have different perceptions.

[404] Or the president of a country.

[405] There's only, it's one person.

[406] It's not like, do you like dogs?

[407] I mean, there are so many.

[408] But, you know, president of a country.

[409] There's only, yes, prime minister of a country.

[410] That's only one person.

[411] But if we asked 100 people, how many different opinions we would get?

[412] Very close to 100.

[413] Very true.

[414] 100.

[415] Definitely.

[416] Even more so, maybe.

[417] It's so fun talking to you, Stacy.

[418] It's so fun talking to you, too.

[419] Yes, me too.

[420] You know, from our conversation today, if we had, we talked about a lot of different things under the same, you know, we, we, we focused on one topic, but we hit a lot of different areas.

[421] If you had to really emphasize on some important aspects, what would be some things you really want the listeners to remember from this conversation?

[422] Right.

[423] Yeah.

[424] Since, you know, we touched a few.

[425] Nice, beautiful things would be the first is just to let's say, you know, let's keep the good old three, three things.

[426] Being yourself is where, you know, we started.

[427] Yeah.

[428] And and, you know, and even though we can make it complicated, we know that if we want to make it simple, we find a way.

[429] Yes.

[430] If you really want to do something, we always find a way.

[431] It's like, all right, okay, let's be ourselves.

[432] Come on, you know, let's be honest with ourselves.

[433] Let's tell ourselves the truth, which is the foundation of self -confidence.

[434] Confidence is from the Latin, to confide, which is to confide with the self, self -confidence.

[435] To confide means to tell, The truth.

[436] Yes.

[437] To whom?

[438] To yourself.

[439] Yes.

[440] That's it.

[441] That's what it means.

[442] It's just be honest with yourself.

[443] Tell yourself the truth.

[444] So we broke it down.

[445] That's great.

[446] So being yourself, being spontaneous.

[447] And then, you know, really, it's so important, especially these.

[448] day and age and this wonderful time it's fantastic the best time in human history that we have more options more choices than we know what to do with yeah we have the option the possibility to really do stuff we love to do yes especially you know for work because we spend like 70 75 percent of our time working What a waste to be spending all that time doing stuff you hate.

[449] So no excuses.

[450] If you're, you know, if you're not enjoying and you're listening to this message, you know what to do.

[451] And the third, since we spent so much time talking about the power of thought and it's not about.

[452] changing negative thoughts with, you know, silly affirmations, even though, you know, a good personal manifesto is very powerful.

[453] And in fact, I actually, you know, I actually explain what it is, but it's honest.

[454] It's real.

[455] Who are you?

[456] To the best of your ability that you can come up with, to the best of, you know, your heart, what you really think about yourself.

[457] Yes.

[458] Write it down.

[459] You know, your values, your aspirations.

[460] Who are you?

[461] And it's not cast in stone because it's always evolving.

[462] We are not a thing.

[463] We are everything.

[464] We are everything.

[465] And anyway, you know, regarding thought, let's remember that we are living not in the feeling of the world in the feeling of my wife in the feeling of the people around me i'm living in the feeling of my thinking yes that's a powerful message that is a very powerful message that is amazing you blew me away today with this conversation i love it i love it now For people who want to read your book, where can they find your book and purchase it?

[466] Yeah.

[467] Amazon, best place.

[468] Okay.

[469] In all formats.

[470] It's also the audio book is available and all the other formats.

[471] Kindle, hardbound, paperback.

[472] Love it.

[473] Love it.

[474] Yes.

[475] And what are some of the services that you provide to people?

[476] Mostly coaching.

[477] And I have other businesses.

[478] But, you know, investing I do.

[479] But, you know, my passion is coaching.

[480] I love it.

[481] I love it.

[482] Anybody interested, my website is matttraverso .com.

[483] And can you spell that for people just so they know?

[484] Sure.

[485] Matt is M -A -T -T.

[486] As in Matt.

[487] And Traverso is like traverse, to traverse, traverse.

[488] So let's spell it.

[489] It's T -R -A -V -E -R -S -O.

[490] All one word.

[491] Dot com.

[492] Love it.

[493] Love it.

[494] This has been amazing.

[495] I thank you so much for coming on the show today.

[496] This has been just an amazing conversation.

[497] You really brought a lot of light to a lot of issues, you know, and you really called out a lot of things that our society does that we really need to like really think about.

[498] And, you know, some of those things are very superficial and we have to go a step further and really.

[499] dive deep into ourselves and really start working on doing some of the techniques you mentioned in this conversation today to actually get to the point where we can unlock our true potential and we can actually reach that point where we are the best version of ourselves and realize that this world is not exactly how...

[500] We perceive it because everybody has a different perception of the world.

[501] It's with the thoughts we put in our head that make the perception and everybody's perception is different.

[502] So it's that small lens that everybody has.

[503] But imagine if we didn't have that perception and we didn't let those thoughts interfere with the world itself.

[504] How?

[505] the world really is.

[506] What is the world?

[507] What really makes this world?

[508] And what really is going on?

[509] And how are really people?

[510] Because it's our thoughts that create our behavior and create our actions.

[511] So if we didn't have all those thoughts controlling us and we had a fresher, better way of implementing those thoughts into our head, that would unlock our true potential.

[512] then we could actually, we could start seeing the world from a different light and maybe a more positive light and we wouldn't have so much chaos in this world.

[513] Exactly.

[514] Sacrosanct.

[515] So true.

[516] Beautifully put.

[517] Excellent.

[518] Well, this has been amazing, Matt.

[519] Thank you so much for being on the show.

[520] I hope you'll come back again and we can dive deeper into some of these topics that we talked about.

[521] But thank you so much for today.

[522] It was a great pleasure.

[523] And again, thanks for inviting me. And I look forward to seeing you next time.

[524] Cheers.

[525] Cheers.