#1381 - Donnell Rawlings

[0] Why is that?

[1] I don't know.

[2] It just feels, when you say turn my shit up, the engineers and the producers feel like, oh, shit, this nigga just turned this shit up.

[3] He's about to go in.

[4] It gives you the impression that you're about to spit the hottest 16 of your life.

[5] 16.

[6] What is 16?

[7] 16 bars in a song.

[8] Like a, you don't know this?

[9] No. So nobody's ever come up to you and say, nobody's ever come up to you to say, let me get your 16.

[10] spits a hot 16 nobody's ever said that to you never in my life have i heard that expression you need to change your places you hang out for real man i mean i mean i don't know i'm not trying i'm just saying because i'm pretty sure they're places you would have all the people all the black people you know all the rappers and nobody nobody's asked me a rapist nobody's ever asked you to spit no no no never i've never ever ever practice never come on joe don't lie never i'm not lying no No, you don't have any time You don't Is that time for black people Are time for rap I'm just trying to figure out Time for me to rap I like listening But I've done zero rapping myself You like You like You like I don't know People got little slick ways And saying stuff man No I don't have any time To be rapping I limit my What I try to do Okay you don't have time for rap I don't have time to do it I like listening Okay this is the point I'm making about Spitting If you listen to it there's probably a song that you like and there's never been a time in your life you've been in the mirror out of the shower that it felt good to you and you tried to spitting is the same as repeating everything that the person said right so not one to not one song that you've never tried to sing a verse or or a hook from that song I've definitely done that but no one's ever asked me to spit so if I ask you what's your favorite rap song could you spit it would you be able to spit it I would have to think about it My favorite What would my favorite be?

[11] I like old school shit Like I like a lot of like Cool G rap I like old shit Yeah so you take Oh you're going back Almost the Sugar Hill days You remember sugar That for sure Hip hop Hip hop hip up hip it to the hipto the hip hop You know that motherfucker you're spitting I'm spitting You're spitting You're spitting but don't spit For nobody in public Because you look too excited about it You're like you hip hip hip hip hip hip hip hip hop But if you remember that song you remember when that song first came out and I know I'm dating myself you literally could get pussy if you knew every word to um rap as delight I remember I was in junior high school and people were playing it in the lunchroom and on a record player not record players but tape cassettes yeah cassette I remember thinking wow this is like a new kind of music it's a new kind of music not only the way you had to learn it like it wasn't like now you could skip through the timeline to a song whatever you it was a cassette so it would play then you had to rewind it Back to that same spot and keep doing it You had to keep doing it until you learned all the words But cassette players were fairly recent back then So that was like when Sugar Hill came out Was around the time cassette players were out Well you could walk around and play the music You didn't need a record player You didn't have a record player And what people would do with those boombox You would record your favorite music From the radio from your boom box So you would have a nice little tape You have a nice tape and you think it's like Oh this shit is clear Did you hear somebody say Tisha get the fuck off the stone because it was right, it was recording right in actual time.

[12] Remember a lot of them had two decks so you could record other people shit too.

[13] Yeah, a lot of black people and had the white dudes in the suburbs had the double decks.

[14] The double deckers.

[15] Yeah, we had to sing.

[16] Double decks for nice because you could get a friend and he had a cassette and you could copy that cassette.

[17] And you, and then we would copy them.

[18] We had go in D .C. That was really big with go -go music.

[19] You know what go -go music is?

[20] Go -go music.

[21] It's like African funk funk.

[22] jazz beat it's like a lot of percussion what's a good go -go music artist um rare essence that's a band a trouble funk is a band EU I'm old school so these were the biggest bands back then then he had this band called the junkyard band you know junkyard band the way they started was they was really they kind of like copied the Cosby you know the Cosby show when he had that the backyard band they was on radiators and stuff and these are guys will just take buckets and cardboard and cowbells and woodblocks and just basically get a beat but you didn't...

[23] Sorry, did you ever listen to when the brand new heavies got together with a bunch of different rappers and produced?

[24] It's a very interesting album.

[25] There's like, I think there's only one that they put out but you could get it off of iTunes I think.

[26] But like Kooji rap did one a bunch of other guys did one but they did like they wrapped over like different kind of music oh yeah yeah and did it get popular it was pretty popular back in the 90s i think what was it was it erosmith and um run DMC yeah that was a big moment that was some crazy shit yeah i mean you knew for black being a black person we knew rappers going the next level we was like this yo they fuck with new white boys now once you put that white boy vibe in there man it was like it was out and that was that was the first time i had ever been done One of the things that we talked about recently, I was saying, like, think about the number, the sheer number of white rappers who have actually made it.

[27] It's a tiny, tiny number.

[28] Like, if you were a white rapper, your kid, like, if your kid was a white rapper, and he's like, Dad, I want to be a rapper, you're like, oh, good luck.

[29] First, you got to get them, yeah, but you got to get him a lot of black friends first.

[30] A lot of black friends, because they're going to beat his ass down, not physically, but mentally.

[31] Mentally.

[32] And that's the same thing the black community did with Eminem.

[33] Right.

[34] Right.

[35] When Eminem first came out, every black person that appreciated rap or lyrics or flow knew he was good.

[36] But they just wasn't going to give him a pass.

[37] It's like when you go in the military, you know, they treat the new green person, the Jeep person.

[38] They treat him like shit.

[39] And that's what they did with M &M.

[40] And M &M just kept coming, coming with fire, kept coming with fire to the point where he's respected as one of the best to ever do it.

[41] By the way, happy Veterans Day.

[42] Thank you.

[43] I appreciate it.

[44] You are a veteran.

[45] I am.

[46] The funniest veteran probably on the planet Earth right across.

[47] I appreciate it.

[48] I appreciate that.

[49] Probably the reason why I got out of the military was my sense of humor.

[50] Really?

[51] Yeah, I kept getting in trouble.

[52] I kept getting in trouble.

[53] I kept getting in trouble to the point where this was what I used to hear almost every Monday.

[54] Airman, and I was in a position of attention, Airman Rawlins, your blatant disregard for established military policy shows a lack of military burn and integrity.

[55] Wow.

[56] Every day.

[57] That's what they do when they give you an L -O -R.

[58] a letter of reprimand, and it's like a thing that you put in your file, eventually you're going to stack all those things I'm going to try to kick you out.

[59] But when I was in the military, I got out, I didn't get out dishonorably.

[60] The only way you get out dishonorably, if it's like doing wartime or something like that.

[61] I got an honorable discharge, but I was that close to fucking my whole life up if I would have stayed.

[62] Yeah.

[63] Yeah, they was going to kick me out.

[64] I just was on joke time all the time.

[65] I was on joke town When I left I was stationed in Koon -San, Korea I left Koon -San Korea and I went to bowling airspace Washington, D .C., and I'm from D .C. So I was, they knew I was close to home and every Monday they would give me a random drug test every Monday.

[66] He was like, every Monday at 11 o 'clock I would get randomly tested for drugs.

[67] I always passed, but I knew that they thought something different to me and I knew it was time.

[68] I did my four -year commitment, my four -year enlistment, and then I broke out.

[69] What was it like being in Korea?

[70] For me, I had just, I was, when I went in, I went in the Air Force, I was 17.

[71] You know, when you underage, your parents have to sign, give you permission for you to go.

[72] Why did you go in so early?

[73] Because the way my birthday fell, some kind of way when I graduated from high school, I was only 17.

[74] And I didn't plan on, I wasn't going to go to college.

[75] I didn't really have a trade.

[76] And then for a lot of black people, that's the alternative.

[77] That's how you explore the world.

[78] It was probably for some black people The first time you ever got on the airplane First time you've been off your block So it was a good It was a good transition from going to high school Not not doing anything But I was just I was a little kid Like when I went to Kuntan career I didn't know there was no drinking age over there When you're in the military Over in like a remote base They do what they give you rations for alcohol You can get four cases of beer Or one case of beer is equivalent to a fifth of liquor So you get four bottles of liquor or two bottles of liquor, two cases of beer.

[79] But when they told me how do you want to separate your rations, I said, I'm too young to drink.

[80] There's ain't no drinking age over here.

[81] First time I ever went to a liquor store on base, I got like four -fifths of tequila mix.

[82] Wow, and you were 17.

[83] I was 17.

[84] I got four, because I thought, I didn't know what the fuck liquor wears in.

[85] I had four.

[86] They was like, you want to get any alcohol with this?

[87] I was like, oh, I'm sorry.

[88] It was just the fucking fruit -flavored shit that you add to it to mix.

[89] Mix it with.

[90] That's how young I was.

[91] Now, when you, when you get this ration of a case of beer or a month?

[92] A month.

[93] Oh, it's a month.

[94] Yeah.

[95] That's what it is.

[96] So 24 beers a month, you get.

[97] Yep.

[98] But then people will hustle with shit.

[99] It'll be like this time.

[100] All right, I'll give you a case of beer.

[101] It was almost like being in jail.

[102] I give you a case of beer for carted and cigarettes.

[103] You know, and then people that didn't drink, they were selling ration.

[104] So it's a way, if you really had a problem, there was a way to get around it.

[105] I was scared of the military when I was a kid.

[106] Why?

[107] Because I thought, well, first of all, I was thinking about joining, because I didn't know what the fuck I was going to do.

[108] But you were thinking about joining to actually fight for your country or just?

[109] No, there was no war right back then.

[110] But there was a, they had a Taekwondo team.

[111] You was going to join just to be on Taekwondo team?

[112] Yeah, yeah.

[113] Well, I needed to figure out a way to make a living while I was competing.

[114] Right.

[115] You know, when I was a kid, when I threw out high school and into my 20s, that's all I did was fighting.

[116] Taekwondo tournaments.

[117] It was my whole life.

[118] There was a dude named Clay Barber.

[119] He was a national high level, highly ranked guy.

[120] He was like two or three in the world, two or three in the country.

[121] And he was an army guy.

[122] He had a job in the Army, and he was on the Army Taekwondo team.

[123] The Army had a team.

[124] And I remember thinking, oh, well, maybe that's the move.

[125] To join?

[126] Yeah.

[127] Especially if they knew you were nice, because that's what they did with, I mean, that was the case with some guys that couldn't pursue a NBA career you know they knew you were like extra talent in a certain field they would put you in just to like you wouldn't have to do the normal stuff you would just been traveling the world just beating the shit out of people yeah well you remember Ray Mercer Mercer started in the army he did yeah that's when he won a gold medal I believe he was in the army just before that before he won the gold medal which heavyweight fighter joined the army after he um was it Riddick Boe Riddick Bo joined the Marines because he was trying to get some discipline Man, that was the dumbest He was struggling Look, man, there's a reality About getting hit in the head And nobody wants to talk about it Until it's too late most of the time But to get hit into a branch of service You start making bad decisions And for him he decided that he needed discipline Because Riddick used to blow up And he had a problem with discipline Had a problem with like conditioning You know, when he'd get in condition When he'd be disciplined He was a motherfucker like those holy field fights But then he would have fights where he just came in and he was just not in quite good enough shape and he would fall apart because of that.

[128] And I think he had decided the way to get real discipline was to join the Marines.

[129] That's interesting to me because I'm pretty sure when he joined he wasn't like probably a press for cash.

[130] I don't think it was a press for cash thing, man. I think he wanted discipline.

[131] He just wanted to figure out how to, maybe he felt like if they just whipped him in his shape, he would get past that hump.

[132] Because when you're a guy who's a multimillionaire and you're a world champion and you're still lazy.

[133] Yeah.

[134] Like, fuck, man, what do I have to do?

[135] Let a white man yell at you for like two miles.

[136] Black man, you know, there's a lot of black drilling.

[137] That would have been so fucking fucked up.

[138] Riddick Bow is in your squadron and whatever.

[139] And you yell at him and you know this one punch, this motherfucker just kill your ass, man. I'm saying?

[140] Like, there's always got to be something separate.

[141] Like, this guy can yell at me so much, but there's nothing he can do about it.

[142] And Riddick probably could have fucked up half the people that he was enlisted with.

[143] A hundred percent of the people, Not even half.

[144] Did it change anything?

[145] No, he quit.

[146] He got out quick.

[147] They let him go.

[148] I mean, he was only in for a short period of time.

[149] But like I said, I think a lot of that has to do with just trauma, brain trauma.

[150] You make terrible decisions.

[151] It's a big factor, man. It's a big factor.

[152] And if you listen to Riddick now, he has a real hard time talking.

[153] It's real rough to hear.

[154] There's so many of those boxers when they get out of the ring, I think Sugar Ray Lina, out of all the ones that still out publicly and doing things, he's probably one that I can listen to and you can understand the scene like this his faculties are off too much not too much but somewhat he's definitely struggling you could hear him he there's a pause to the way he talks that is noticeable like he can keep it together and he can string together good sentences but I mean you don't get over those wars and he had with Roberto Duran and Tommy Hearns and Marvin Hagler that was the welterweight division right that division at that time was so fire and then Sugar Ray people fucking hate him so much because he was so pretty he was so nice looking you know what I'm saying I'm like just I just want to put a scar in his motherfucker's face that's how Durant felt about him yeah he'll beat your ass and take your girl in the same fucking fight man he was so good too he was so fun to watch but then he's like another one he stuck around too long hector Camacho stopped him and Terry Norris stopped him and later in his career man he was getting fucked up it just was wrong he shouldn't have been fighting you know it seems like when I look at like boxing stuff like that and people can have like an unblemished record but it feels like I feel like they'll never quit until it's almost like you got to get knocked out the ring or somebody have to give you the reason to quit well Andre Ward did you know and I was just talking to him real recently because they offered him a rematch with a fight rather with Canelo Alvarez because Canello just knocked out Sergey Kovalev for the light heavyweight title and they said look this is a big super fight you know Andre Ward should come out of retirement he's still in his prime he's only 35 years old he's he's like no thank you no thank you 100 % undefeated Olympic gold medalist two division world champion he said I'm good I'm good I have money no he's so he's like I have money I have a family and this is his wise words he said I'm a better asset to boxing if I'm retired I'm a better asset to boxing as an example of what's possible that you can do all this and come out with 100 % of your faculties and you talk to that guy, he's 100 % there.

[155] And he's making money as a commentator and an analyst.

[156] He's got a great career.

[157] He made money.

[158] He's good.

[159] He's like, I'm good.

[160] Yeah.

[161] And I don't want to lose my brain.

[162] And everybody's different ways to do.

[163] The interesting thing to me, as vicious and notorious as Mike Tyson used to be and probably still is, it's just something that makes me feel good knowing that this motherfucker is funny.

[164] And I know this may sell crazy, but he's like a lovable Mike.

[165] Yes.

[166] Very you know like lovable and high as a kite all day long well that would make that would make you lovable well that's what he said it makes him a better person like we talked about he's like yeah he was like i think it makes me a better person it does man he's nice he's a nice guy to be around somebody just uh posted it came back that that interview when he was promoting his uh one man show and he was sitting down in the college with this black guy and the black guy was trying to push him into a corner say some crazy shit yeah man i had so much fucking respect for Mike Tyson for doing that because people always use the excuse I'm the media know this is the question the people want to know that's not the questions the people want to know that's the questions you want to know and that's the shit you want to say to provoke somebody to turn into a motherfucking beast well he didn't even want to promote them he wanted to make them feel bad yeah make them feel bad and I'm pretty sure you don't go like your PR person we're going here we're trying to promote this right somebody put him up to it but when he just look at him showing a piece of shit.

[167] And he realized he's like six feet away from one of the baddest motherfucker that's ever lived.

[168] Man, I started shaking because I was like, where is the tape of what happened fucking after that shit, man?

[169] Well, listen, that is what it is.

[170] That guy was a piece of shit.

[171] Yeah, that was nasty.

[172] He tried to fuck with him on TV, corner him, and, you know, and have a gotcha moment.

[173] And then he tried to flip it and go back to it.

[174] And Mike was like, no, I'm already pissed.

[175] No, no, no. You are a piece of shit.

[176] Shout out to Mike Tyson for identifying the piece of shit and distinguishing and shit.

[177] Imagine being him and sitting across from that guy and the guy's all friendly with you up until that moment.

[178] And then when the lights are on, the camera's going, and then he pulls that shit on you.

[179] A lot of people don't know what to do there.

[180] He knew what to do.

[181] He went real on him.

[182] I mean, he probably felt that it could come up, but maybe even like, yo, you're a brother, don't do it to me, you know?

[183] What was he promoting back then?

[184] That was promoting the one -man show?

[185] It was the one -man show, yeah.

[186] Undisputed.

[187] What was it?

[188] Undisputed.

[189] Yeah.

[190] And that was a good show.

[191] I watched it on, I think it was HBO Showtime.

[192] Well, I watched the documentary.

[193] The documentary is incredible.

[194] Documentary is incredible.

[195] Yeah, but it's just so good to know that, like, from having as much fame and fortunate as he had, and basically to start over and reinvent yourself.

[196] And, I mean, I guess he's going to be just generations how George Foreman was.

[197] Yeah, in a lot of ways, right?

[198] Yeah.

[199] Yeah.

[200] Well, George Foreman reinvented himself while he was fucking people up, though.

[201] Yeah.

[202] George Foreman came back, a preacher.

[203] I remember when he came back, he was 36 years old.

[204] He had a big belly.

[205] He was huge.

[206] He was like 300 pounds.

[207] And people thought it was a joke.

[208] They're like, this comeback's a joke.

[209] Right.

[210] I mean, while he kept losing weight, kept beating people up, kept losing weight.

[211] And then when he fucked up Jerry Cooney, everybody was like, hey, wait a minute.

[212] Wait a minute.

[213] He is legit.

[214] But he still looked like a fucking regular dude.

[215] Nah, not quite.

[216] I mean, he never.

[217] He was round.

[218] He had like a barrel.

[219] chest, but he had these giant fucking arms.

[220] And that dude has canned hams for fists.

[221] He has some of the biggest fists you've ever seen.

[222] He's swinging axes and shit.

[223] Oh, he does.

[224] He did swing axes.

[225] And all of his kids' name of George.

[226] Even his daughter.

[227] He called his daughter like Georgina.

[228] Yeah.

[229] He's crazy.

[230] He did really good.

[231] Who doesn't have a goddamn George forming grill?

[232] That's a great grill.

[233] Yep.

[234] When you were like a single guy and you need to cook something quick.

[235] College.

[236] Military.

[237] Cooks top and bottom.

[238] Chicken cutlets.

[239] And you get grill marks.

[240] Women are impressed.

[241] No matter if you fucking live in a 100 square foot dorm room.

[242] If you got grill marks.

[243] Oh, I see you're a fancy motherfucker.

[244] You got grill marks.

[245] This motherfucker is gourmet.

[246] Gourmet grill marks.

[247] It's a good way to cook.

[248] It's easy.

[249] It's easy too, and it's clean.

[250] Do you do elk?

[251] George Foreman grill?

[252] That's like sacrilege.

[253] Really?

[254] Yeah.

[255] I really was expecting just a slice of some elk.

[256] Dude, you got to come over.

[257] Come over and I'll cook something at my house.

[258] I want to do it.

[259] would be happy to cook for you.

[260] I know you're a good cook, too.

[261] No, don't.

[262] That's not what you know, because you talk shit to me one time.

[263] No, no, no, no, no. I was told you were a good cook.

[264] I didn't talk shit.

[265] No, yes, you did, Joe.

[266] What did I say?

[267] I said, I said, I want a piece of elk.

[268] I think this is what I said.

[269] You said, well, you know, for a new guy, this is the best way to do it for your first time.

[270] And if you knew to cooking, you said some shit like that.

[271] Well, if you knew to cook a wild game, it's different.

[272] There's no fat in it.

[273] It dries out really quick.

[274] You got to cook it low and slow.

[275] You can't cook it like you cook a beef steak I can cook it I can cook it I know you can cook now I mean the way you do it You got very offended though I didn't get offended though I was saying that you haven't cooked I wasn't saying you never cooked before I don't have no knowledge Of whether or not you know how to cook I got a hundred pieces back there You tell me I got everything for you All right give me a piece of elk And I'm gonna do my elk magic to it And I'm gonna let you know That's without you telling me How you gotta cook is slow Okay And if I want to do that I could use I could do it the, what is that thing, the savi, what is that?

[276] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a great way to cook.

[277] See, now I'm on a different level, right?

[278] Yeah, oh, I do that.

[279] I do suvi, I love it.

[280] It feels like you're doing some type of science project.

[281] I know, right?

[282] You know, you got to have the temperature right, make sure the appers right, and then you see this big ass bucket of water, and then you keep putting your finger in it, like, it don't feel like it's hot enough to cook this shit.

[283] And the weird thing is you're cooking in a plastic bag.

[284] That feels fucked up, too.

[285] Yeah, it almost feels like you're like a dope dealer doing that shit, man. A little bit.

[286] You got to have a food processor.

[287] Not a food processor, but you have a vacuum sealer.

[288] A food saver.

[289] And you got to have a thermometer and you got to do it.

[290] It takes time.

[291] But it's kind of fun.

[292] Oh, it's great.

[293] You know, you can cook a steak for like five hours at 130 degrees.

[294] God damn, that thing will just melt in your mouth.

[295] It's good for eggs, too.

[296] It's good for everything.

[297] Suvi is great.

[298] I love it.

[299] But you got to be in that suave mode because after a while, you're like, man, fuck this, man. Do you blow torch the outside?

[300] How do you finish it?

[301] What?

[302] When you take like a seat?

[303] Do you braze it in like a, on a skillet?

[304] Yeah, you do that too.

[305] Because you still got to get that crisp, but the texture of and everything's good.

[306] And I would think that would be something really, really good for, like, for Wild Game.

[307] Oh, 100%.

[308] 100%.

[309] So we're on the same page.

[310] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[311] Yeah, a lot of people use it.

[312] Have you ever cooked any Wild game before?

[313] No. No. Wild pig is great that way, too, suvi, or barbecue?

[314] So what's the big difference?

[315] What's the noticeable difference?

[316] The taste of it or the texture of it?

[317] Everything.

[318] The taste, the texture, it's a firmer meat.

[319] It's the texture is, it's like an athlete.

[320] I mean, you're eating like a fucking thing that can run up hills.

[321] It's just so different than a cow.

[322] Cows are just sitting around eating.

[323] They don't use those muscles very much.

[324] And so that's why it's all mushy and tender.

[325] It's more tough, but it's not too tough.

[326] Especially, like, I'll give you good cuts, like a tri -tip is nice, you know, or backstrap's the best.

[327] So it would be good for roasting, too.

[328] That's what I think I'm going to do.

[329] Oh, yeah, I got some roast back there.

[330] Yeah.

[331] I roasted it like 250 degrees and then I sear it on the outside after it's done.

[332] See, you got to keep telling me. your process, bro.

[333] You can do whatever you want.

[334] I'm just telling you what I do.

[335] All right.

[336] I might take some of the competition.

[337] It's always gone.

[338] It's always gone.

[339] That's the most competitive people always say.

[340] The most competitive people always say, yo, yo, yo.

[341] That's so true.

[342] Dude, I'm not in the competition with you.

[343] But I've been training for eight months to not be in a competition with you.

[344] That's true.

[345] Everything is competition.

[346] Healthy competition.

[347] Then you got fucked up competition.

[348] That's right.

[349] There's two guns.

[350] Yeah.

[351] But I love.

[352] You know who was a really good cook?

[353] Ralphie Mae.

[354] That motherfucker could cook.

[355] Yeah.

[356] But he went through a stomach stapling operation and he couldn't eat meat for a while.

[357] I think he just blew through the staples after a while.

[358] He just gave up.

[359] Yeah, that's so fucked up.

[360] He did.

[361] He did a couple times.

[362] A couple times he blew through the staples.

[363] Yeah, they had to redo it.

[364] Damn.

[365] Yeah, Ralphie liked to eat.

[366] I wonder what sandwich he was eating to make you.

[367] That had to be a, that's a subway foot long.

[368] I know.

[369] After you get past to eight inches, you blew plastic.

[370] Like whenever a famous person dies from Coke, you know, they're like, oh, this is the Coke that killed that dude.

[371] You know, like, who's that dude to play for the Celtics?

[372] Who's the dude to play for the Celtics who died of a heart attack?

[373] Lenny Byers?

[374] Yes.

[375] I remember everybody's like, this is the shit that killed Len Byas.

[376] Like, people wanted to sell it to you.

[377] They was calling shit the bias.

[378] Yes, yes.

[379] That was such a tragic story because I'm from the D .C. area, you know, he was like a local guy.

[380] And then especially like when somebody, especially in the black community, if you've got generations of projects and welfare and everything, if one person busts through, it's like a whole bunch of motherfuckers.

[381] And it's unfortunate sometimes because that's kind of the downfall for a lot of people's finances.

[382] But you feel like I got the whole family and everybody gets excited.

[383] And for him not even to ever play a game.

[384] Yeah.

[385] It was, that's just awful, man. Well, there's so many people dropping dead now.

[386] from fentanyl you know so many like prince that's a white person drug no it's not prince died of it oh so that's one of those doctors prescribed yeah well it was a white person drug it's it's pain medication right like prince had hip issues from all the dancing but uh you know tom petty died from it a lot of people i think david bowie died from it didn't he die from it too did david bowie died from fentanyl it kills a shitload of people a shit a lot of times they get it in something else and they don't know they get it in molly or they get it in in coke like artie lang was telling me that he accidentally had it in coke and he didn't even know it until he took suboxone and he was sick for like a week right yeah it's um i don't really know too much about he had cancer yeah oh why did i think he had uh he definitely didn't die from a drug peacefully after an 18 month battle with cancer oh wow okay maybe i'm confusing him with somebody else must be or george michael maybe maybe that's it But that didn't make any sense.

[387] Yeah.

[388] Yeah, I don't know too much about fentanyls and oxy cottons and all that type of shit.

[389] That's like soccer mom drugs.

[390] Well, those are painkillers.

[391] It's like a lot of times it's the people start off.

[392] They get a back injury.

[393] You know, you get hurt on the job or go lifting weights or something like that.

[394] You pull your back out.

[395] You're like, ah, the doctor hooks you up with some oxycontin, and you can't get off that shit.

[396] I did.

[397] The only time I did, I did it on, I had surgery on my knee.

[398] I told my patella trying to dunk on the eight -foot basketball room, trying to impress you.

[399] some kids and you know I was like oh man I'm not taking no pain killers fuck that I'll just have a a wooden spoon in my mouth I'm a man up man I laid down that first fucking night and that fucking blood started hitting that wound I was screaming for that oxycodone I took that shit I was blinked I was I could finally realize the lyrics in most of these trap songs when I was high off that shit so I'm like this is what designer was saying all this time I got room in the fanda panda panda Brandon.

[400] I really, I was like, this shit is crazy.

[401] I can't see how people, I mean, I can't see because I've never been addicted to anything like that, but it's just weird to see people that want to be in that state of mind all the time.

[402] Yeah, I think it's a lot of the people were sexually abused or physically abused, and they just, there's a thing about heroin, they say.

[403] I've never tried it, but I've done morphine when I was, when I had knee surgery, they gave me a drip while I was in the hospital, a little button you press anytime you want, you get, you hit it.

[404] And I was like, like ha ha ha ha so was instant soon as you felt to pay yeah you just hit it bang yeah give you a little drip of morphine anytime you want it bang bang bang bang bang bang bang you can hit it but i think for a lot of people that get addicted to it at least it's been explained to me there a lot of them are suffering from physical abuse sexual abuse and there's a thing about morphine or heroin that gives you like a womb feeling like you're protected you're safe everything's okay oh yeah that's like a hug that's what they say well we say heroin's supposed to make you feel like that yeah like a hug like the world's I played a heroin addict on HBO's a corner years ago.

[405] Oh, yeah?

[406] And I was trying to figure out, like, what, how do I get my mind set to be high?

[407] Right.

[408] Right.

[409] I was like, what could they, because you see those heroin addicts.

[410] They'd, like, they lean and they nodding and they come back up.

[411] I'm like, what could they possibly be thinking about to take them into this world?

[412] And I, in the way I've related to, I was like, they're probably thinking about, it takes them to a place when they were feeling younger, It just takes them away from the real world and just feel like zombies stay just floating.

[413] Yeah, just floating like that umbilical cord fluid, embryonic fluid, just in the womb.

[414] With no thought, but that's a tragic.

[415] It is tragic jug.

[416] Well, sometimes people just feel so overwhelmed by life, you know, so overwhelmed by pressure and stress and bills and relationships and jobs and this and that.

[417] They just need an escape.

[418] Everybody needs escape.

[419] Everybody has problems.

[420] You people, the biggest thing now, people talking about, like, the biggest thing in the news everywhere is mental illness.

[421] Yeah.

[422] Mental health is real.

[423] It's real.

[424] It's been there forever, but people just cope with it different.

[425] You know, like, I know in my community, and they say black people especially, like, don't address mental issues.

[426] You know what I'm saying?

[427] It's like a black person, they have a problem either way.

[428] I just need, I need a shot of ass.

[429] You know what I mean?

[430] I need some henny.

[431] I need to smoke a joint.

[432] I need to do a line or something, you know?

[433] Right.

[434] But everybody has mental issues, but how do we cope with it?

[435] People have different coping mechanisms.

[436] There's no way you're going to get through this life without some mental struggle.

[437] There's no way.

[438] No way.

[439] It's not possible because if you just sit around and do nothing, you'll be filled with angst.

[440] It can't do that just because of the world.

[441] It's just so much shit going on.

[442] There's too much shit going on.

[443] Everybody's got struggles.

[444] There's no way around it.

[445] No way around it.

[446] Yeah.

[447] And the person that don't have struggle, them motherfuckers are probably that close to being suicidal.

[448] You know what I'm saying?

[449] People that hide it are the ones that go first.

[450] I think a strong community is important, you know, like having a lot of people around you that you love, you know, family, friends.

[451] Like, that's important to, people that you could talk to.

[452] Like, what you feel loved, I think one of the real problems of people that just doesn't feel fixable is when they feel alone.

[453] They feel alienated.

[454] Like them by themselves.

[455] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[456] They don't feel like they're in like a group.

[457] They don't feel like they're in a community.

[458] They just feel like nobody gives a fuck about them when they live or die.

[459] And that's one of the saddest feelings, I think, you could have.

[460] How could you make somebody feel like that?

[461] That's just awful to make somebody.

[462] But then those same people probably have, don't have that one person that can confide in.

[463] That one person is not going to bullshit them.

[464] The one person doesn't want anything.

[465] Right.

[466] And one person, listen.

[467] Yeah, if you don't have anyone in your life, you don't have anybody that's telling you the truth or lying.

[468] You know, and there's a lot of people out there that are real lonely that only exist on the Internet.

[469] You know?

[470] Internet is the, the Internet is the most fabricated, lonely place.

[471] in the world and it's so it's interesting because it's like especially what we do is like you feel like you need it but then after a while this shit is just so fucking overwhelming and it's so easy for a person to carve out the perfect life.

[472] People are to tell you like oh my God I thought you was having so much fun on vacation this and that you know how fucking many takes it takes to get that perfect picture to show everybody that your life is the fucking bomb.

[473] Yeah.

[474] It's just a not, it's not an accurate representative of anybody's life.

[475] And it's everywhere, and that's where everybody wants to show their lives.

[476] I said, you tell, average chick, right, I won't say on the street, but this is an average woman.

[477] If you tell them that, I want to take you on a vacation, anywhere in the world you want to go, but you can't bring a phone.

[478] You know what half of the motherfuckers would say?

[479] Let me think about that.

[480] Because nobody wants to have a memory and share memory just from the memory they have.

[481] Right.

[482] It's like they wanted to get validated.

[483] They wanted people to get the thumbs up and everything.

[484] And nobody, even your shows, whatever, it's so weird.

[485] Like when I first started doing those shows where they lock your phones up, I was like the first comic going on stage.

[486] And the first comic going on stage in front of a room with everybody phones locked up, they get in the heat.

[487] Because people are like, what the fuck, man?

[488] I've seen people trying to bite them shit's open.

[489] I've seen people cut the motherfuckers open.

[490] I've seen motherfucker answer, answer, try to answer the phone.

[491] Through the paper?

[492] And it feels weird at the beginning, but then after wow, it gets to a point where it feels kind of cool.

[493] It's like you feel like you're in the moment.

[494] You're connected.

[495] You're connected.

[496] Who fuck wants to watch the show?

[497] How can you enjoy a show like this?

[498] Yeah.

[499] Well, there's a lot of people doing that, too.

[500] You know, I realized it when I went to Comedy Works in Denver.

[501] They were the first place I ever went to that locked up phones.

[502] Now the improv does it.

[503] They do it every show.

[504] It's the way to do it, man. You know, I wish people would just put their phones away, but they don't want to.

[505] They want to.

[506] Everything has to be recorded and everything.

[507] You got to always show people what you're doing every second.

[508] Well, they want to see a picture.

[509] Look, I got a picture.

[510] It's Donnell.

[511] Look at he's on stage right now.

[512] I want to see somebody with an Instagram that looks at your fucked up life.

[513] See how many.

[514] See how many lights you get for your life being fucked up.

[515] And you're showing up to you, everything.

[516] All the type of shit, bologna and cheese sandwiches for dinner and shit.

[517] The real shit on the carpet again.

[518] Fuck.

[519] Not the fucking, oh my God, best life, yacht life, living my best life.

[520] Yeah, but it's that thrill of, you know, showing everybody that you're killing it, you know.

[521] Yeah.

[522] Like, that's why a lot of people try to do well.

[523] They try to do well to show people that are doing well.

[524] Oh, yeah, everything is for the ground.

[525] It's very weird, man. But then it's like you, but then on the other side of it, you want people to see you doing good things.

[526] Yes.

[527] People want to follow your momentum and people want to ride with your journey.

[528] You know what I mean you see?

[529] And there's not too many of us, like, you probably, there's not too many people that like can live a social media free life and still make money doing entertainment.

[530] It's real hard.

[531] Dave does it.

[532] Yeah.

[533] He's one of the only people that I know that does it.

[534] But he's so intelligent about that kind of shit.

[535] He doesn't engage in that.

[536] he doesn't engage in other people's opinions of him he's like he used my phone does he yeah he's not he don't use his phone he ain't go dirty his phone no that's hilarious anything social media whatever he wanted to see through my phone and shit he checks it out through you oh my godfuckers addicted to world star is he that's hilarious yo we'd be on the road man we'd be on the vote and all you see it's this motherfucker and it's always some shit somebody getting ran over by a car some shit it's like oh god Damn, World Star.

[537] He's on World Star, hard as shit.

[538] Oh, that's hilarious.

[539] But anything that's dealing with pop culture and stuff like that, I'm usually like the guy just brings him into it.

[540] Does he just keep no apps on his phone?

[541] I don't think he has a app.

[542] Good for him, man. Good for him.

[543] I lost a phone the other day, man. And I was saying to myself, I was freaking out.

[544] Because you know if you lose a fucking phone, the minute you do the pocket check, you do like all four pockets.

[545] And the first thing you say is fuck.

[546] Right.

[547] And if you're, the worst thing is a person that's going, when you're going out with a group of people, and a person lose the phone just ruined the whole fucking night.

[548] Yeah, because then you've got to go fucking search for it, turn around, go back.

[549] Be quiet.

[550] Call my phone.

[551] Right.

[552] Call my phone.

[553] Could y 'all be quiet?

[554] Because y 'all call my phone?

[555] Because I told myself, I was like, fuck.

[556] Because I got the eye clown and shit now.

[557] So it's not as fucking tragic as it used to be.

[558] Like if you use your phone, you're losing pictures of your kid, being born and all this stuff.

[559] And I lost the phone.

[560] And I was like, fuck, I just lost one like four months ago.

[561] I lost a fucking phone.

[562] I was like, you know what, Donnie?

[563] You can't let your phone fucking regulate your life like that.

[564] You're a person beyond that phone.

[565] I went to sleep, right?

[566] And I was so peaceful.

[567] And I woke up.

[568] And the first thing I wanted to know was what time it was, right?

[569] And I didn't even think to look at a watch or anything.

[570] I was like, where the fuck is my phone?

[571] And I went right back and got a phone.

[572] I did 10 hours out of the phone.

[573] I was about to go crazy.

[574] I was like, how do people fucking do this?

[575] How do you find out?

[576] directions.

[577] Ari Shafir went without a phone for four months.

[578] It was a reality show?

[579] No, he just, yeah, it was his own reality show.

[580] He just decided to go to Asia, he traveled all around Asia, went to like, he went to Vietnam.

[581] Yeah, but he was already loaded.

[582] Yeah, he had money.

[583] Yeah, yeah, you don't just, you just don't, you just don't have like a minimum wage job and just leave your phone for four months.

[584] No, you kind of can't now.

[585] But what's crazy is this is a real recent thing.

[586] Our smartphones are only since two, And what, Jamie, 2007 was the iPhone?

[587] I think so, right?

[588] Because iPhone X is 10 years.

[589] That was two years ago.

[590] So 2007 was the iPhone.

[591] Before that, it was like flip phones and not everybody had them.

[592] You know, and then 10 years before that, nobody had it.

[593] In 1997, nobody had them.

[594] It was a way for everybody, because we look at it as a phone, but nobody uses it for the phone feature.

[595] No. Unless you're old.

[596] Like, only people leave voice messages of people over 45.

[597] Joey Diaz calls you.

[598] That's one thing.

[599] He likes to call, but he likes to talk.

[600] He goes, I'm insecure.

[601] He goes, I want to know what the fuck your voice sounds like.

[602] He goes, I want to call you.

[603] I want to hear your heart.

[604] I want to know what the fuck's going on.

[605] He knows somebody might hack your shit.

[606] But Joey Diaz is probably the only person that leaves voice message when I talk on the phone.

[607] He doesn't, I don't think he leaves voicemail.

[608] He'll leave me a text message.

[609] Call me back, Cocksucker.

[610] That's what it says.

[611] Everybody.

[612] Another night, we were at the store.

[613] It's so funny.

[614] You know how you get in your little zone.

[615] on when you're interested in the comedy store like who's next right right it was so funny because joy i was up next and joy was like they was like who's next it's like donnell and joey's like oh shit this motherfucker's funny as shit he's got a uh a special coming out on netflix degenerates he's a funny motherfucker i love him he's a good fucking friend of mine give it up for rondale darlings right that's just joe yo yo i was like that was the most clever way to call me the end word i've ever heard man i like and then and it was so funny and I know he didn't do it on purpose.

[616] It just happens.

[617] Joey Diaz fucked everybody's name up.

[618] Everybody.

[619] It's half of his charm.

[620] And then he didn't.

[621] The next day, he'd DM.

[622] He said, yo, Dee, I'm sorry.

[623] No disrespect about that.

[624] I was like, man, this shit was funny.

[625] He gave me a funny joke.

[626] And I was fucking Anquan Fanwar.

[627] What's the dude name?

[628] Who?

[629] Fanwa Anwar.

[630] Fahim.

[631] Phahim Anwar.

[632] Yeah, that's what I'm talking.

[633] I told Joey.

[634] I said, I've been fucking his name up for a year and a half.

[635] So we're even, bro.

[636] I can't say Fahimimamwar or whatever for nothing.

[637] The UFC lightweight champion, Kabib Nirmigamehamehoff, he calls him Kalabib.

[638] That sounds close.

[639] He calls him close.

[640] He reversed all my shit.

[641] He fucks everybody's name on.

[642] He fucks everybody's name up.

[643] What other names does he fuck up?

[644] He fucks everybody's name up.

[645] Steve Bokit, Steopek.

[646] He calls Stepe Miochage, Steopik.

[647] You got a lot of love it.

[648] And then this is after he just fucking dismantled the room.

[649] Always.

[650] Now like, I mean, how the fuck I'm going to get into my next joke?

[651] Thank you.

[652] I can just segue that right into my shit.

[653] He's a, he's a national track.

[654] There's nobody like that guy.

[655] There's nobody like him there will never be anybody like him again.

[656] You got certain people that, you know, and I'm not wishing bad anything on Joe, but that just live forever.

[657] You know what I mean?

[658] You'll hear stories for them forever.

[659] And then you'll have stories, especially this is what I respect.

[660] You know, as long as you have people that have been doing comedy for years and years, right?

[661] But a lot of them don't stay sharp.

[662] Right.

[663] You know what I'm saying?

[664] They don't do spots.

[665] Yeah.

[666] You know what I'm saying?

[667] The only time they come out is like, okay, I talk to my accountant.

[668] time to go out and make a couple million and get it, but they're not out there.

[669] And that's one of the things that I really respect about him is that you see somebody that's been ripping, not like a year, their whole career.

[670] And still, you could feel the passion.

[671] You know what I'm saying?

[672] Yes.

[673] You can feel, you know comics are going, and I call them money comics.

[674] As soon as they go on, they look at they watch, okay, I get the light at 40, give me a quicker light, let me get my money to get out of here.

[675] Yeah.

[676] Then you can tell people that really still enjoy the, engagement of the audience, the response they get, they enjoy getting better.

[677] Yes.

[678] They enjoy ripping the stage up for the next person to have to rip the stage up.

[679] They really enjoy the skill set and what it takes to be a great statement.

[680] And Joey is one of the people that, you know how some people, you can just watch them.

[681] Yeah.

[682] You know what I mean?

[683] Even if you know something you heard is going to come on, you just, it's going to be something, some nuance that they do to make it different from the last time.

[684] Well, what Joey does, too, is he gets in the pit.

[685] He gets in there with, you know, 15 comics on a, you know, Tuesday night.

[686] That's big, man. Those spots are big when it's you doing 15, another dude, 15.

[687] And there's so many, and no one's there to see you.

[688] They're to see the whole show.

[689] Right.

[690] And you're there working with guys like you, guys like Chris DeLea, guys, whoever, that's just jammed up with talented comics.

[691] But that's what makes, that's what makes motherfuckers funny.

[692] Yes, yes.

[693] Motherfuckers, you see, you see.

[694] a group of whack comics like birds of a feather flocked together you know what I'm saying you only learn it if you're around a whack comic all the time you never test it yes you know I'm saying you know those do you ever see those nights when people everybody is bombing yes everybody's bomb it's so bad their motherfuckers have have a bomb material ready they just need to get into the bomb you know they just need one all they need is one like oh here's my bomb my bomb jokes but they don't motherfuckers don't go hard right they don't go hard anymore man but in the spots like that in the spot the comedy store motherfuckers go hard some people don't you know some people also they get to a certain point where they have an audience and then they just work for that audience yeah and they know the people going to come see them because the people like them and so they don't they don't do any workout sets they only do sets when they're on the road that's why i do when i go whenever i go like i came up through the chitlin circuit whenever i'm in brooklyn and when i slide through philly you know, on the black county circuit everybody has these rooms you know what I'm saying and as much as we get big where people say they don't do it anymore I like to do them because it just really knows I really know the climate and I know what I'm working with you know I love doing the rooms those rooms like the rooms like that they challenge you because it's taking you out like you say your comfort zone yeah you know I've been blessed enough lately to when I go do my comedy shows and people buy a ticket for me it's usually some good people But every once in a while, I want to go in the hoodest spot ever and see if I still got it.

[695] You know that expression, don't forget what got you to the dance.

[696] Yeah.

[697] Yeah, I mean, that's it.

[698] It's like what made you a great comic in the first place is being tested like that.

[699] Defining moments.

[700] Motherfuckers do not want to deal with a defining moment.

[701] Motherfuckers, I want to deal with that moment where you did 45 minutes, you gassed out, and you get that stretch sign.

[702] They say stretch.

[703] We don't have the checks up, whatever.

[704] We need you do another.

[705] 15 minutes.

[706] That test your skill.

[707] A defining moment when you're working at what is that dome we did?

[708] Tacoma Dome.

[709] Tacoma Dome.

[710] And motherfucker Joe Rogan just comes and just bazooka torches the whole motherfucking arena and shit.

[711] I've never said, I don't know if I've ever shared that story but that fucking day was so dope for me when we did that because that fucking place was fire.

[712] And I know that was your crowd, your energy, like, like, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, And just to be in that room, I remember when you was on stage and I was kind of getting my head together.

[713] I was like, yeah, I'm going to get my shit ready.

[714] And you got to laugh, right?

[715] It was like a, ah, and I was like, oh, shit, I'm about to go on.

[716] I thought it was like you saying good night.

[717] And it was a segue into another joke.

[718] I immediately smoked a cigarette.

[719] A whole cigarette.

[720] And I was like, oh, you better do some push -ups, motherfucker.

[721] This shit ain't going to be easy, sir.

[722] But that was a That was a great moment It was a great moment It was a good time It was a lot of fun It was a lecture I'd never been It felt like I was a And fucking one of UFC fights and shit Man With so many people There's 25 ,000 people In that place And Dave was about to go On stage And he looked at me He goes Not a whole lot of Motherfuckers Get to do shit like this Not at all bro Just the way That whole night went And we were right behind him Like the night was just Like it's something When you say okay It's a level Then it's another level then it's another level then it's another level and then when he came out man it felt like when we walked it felt like we was walking Tyson into the ring that song if you know you know that um push your T song and it was just like that night was like I mean pandemonium bro it was amazing and those nights the funny thing about it people see that and they see you in in front of 24 ,000 25 ,000 people but what people don't understand is those all those nights stacked up of doing 15 minutes here working out of this shit because people see you do these arenas these amphitheas they don't know that you in the trenches always you know what I'm saying always I'm like damn don't this nigga got enough money right I was like wait a minute I hate bombing it's not about the money and it's all about it's just something very addictive about constantly training to be prepared for anything and to be better my lady's sometimes I'm like, you're going out, you're going out tonight?

[723] I don't know if women understand, they call it going out.

[724] You know, I don't call it.

[725] I'm like, working.

[726] I'm going to work out.

[727] And even if I'm, if it's a set I'm working on and I do the same thing, it's just something that's just such a rush about going on stage.

[728] Even if you find something small or small a tag.

[729] Because the joke never ends.

[730] You just stop telling it.

[731] Yep, yep.

[732] It never ends.

[733] It stop telling.

[734] And some people like, you know, where'd you get that from?

[735] Because, you know, the comedy, comedians mindset, people like, write that down, write that down.

[736] We don't always write it down.

[737] Just thinking about how dope we would be if we wrote everything down.

[738] But it goes to a hard drive.

[739] It goes to a hard drive.

[740] And you might have thought of something funny like this year, then next year, you might have never talked about it.

[741] Then next year, something to happen.

[742] And then it'll come up from that hard drive.

[743] And boom, you got a banging ass fucking bit.

[744] Yeah, you never know.

[745] And if you don't go on stage, you won't, that won't blossom.

[746] You got to water those seeds.

[747] I was in, I was in fucking, um, Pleasanton, Pleasanton, California over the weekend at the, uh, Tommy T's.

[748] And this is a young, young guy.

[749] He's a fan of yours.

[750] He wants to do comedy.

[751] And I know his mom, about four years, I put him on stage, and he didn't really do well the first time he went on stage, right?

[752] And then, I appreciate that.

[753] And then, like, he tells me he wants to do comedy, right?

[754] Tell me he want to do comedy.

[755] I was like, okay, do a guest spot.

[756] Wow.

[757] He said, Ubada, ubada.

[758] I call it the ubada, ubada.

[759] That's how you test the motherfucker They'd be like, yeah, I want to do this.

[760] And I've been writing, I've been working on my material and everything.

[761] Okay, go on, ubda, uhbba.

[762] No, I got to wait because I got to, no, motherfucker, you don't got to wait.

[763] And I told him, I like to get a lot.

[764] I said, I'm a comedian, comedian.

[765] Don't talk to me about comedy, no fucking more.

[766] Right.

[767] Because that's the opportunity.

[768] Go do it.

[769] Go do it right now.

[770] And then he still was ubby, and I told him, I was like, maybe this is not for you.

[771] He said, well, you know what?

[772] Maybe I needed this talk.

[773] I was like, you don't need to talk for me, motherfucker.

[774] You need to talk with yourself.

[775] Either you're going to do it or you're not going to do it.

[776] He'd never been on stage before, ever?

[777] No, he'd been on before.

[778] He plays around with it every once in a while.

[779] But it was a filled room, you know what I'm saying?

[780] Yeah.

[781] And I just don't know how things, something could be that intimidating.

[782] I don't know how you could want to be a comic.

[783] You want to be a comic, but you don't want to do the most important thing a comic has to do and go on stage.

[784] It's scary for people, especially if it's a packed crowd.

[785] They know they're there to see you, so they're there to see a pro, and they know their material's kind of whack.

[786] They know it sucks.

[787] Yeah, but you still...

[788] You should try it.

[789] I mean, how much time was you going to do?

[790] Five minutes?

[791] Yeah, that's nothing.

[792] Just go up there and do it.

[793] Oh, hold on.

[794] You take...

[795] You take...

[796] That's a Kevin Smith weed.

[797] Oh, that's my dog.

[798] That's the...

[799] From the movie, Jay and Silent Bob?

[800] Yeah, that's his Jay and Salibaba.

[801] With the cartoon on the inside of it?

[802] Yeah.

[803] I had that.

[804] I went to the premiere.

[805] I was in that film.

[806] I went to the fucking premiere.

[807] I know exactly.

[808] I love that dude.

[809] Yeah, he's so dope, man. He's a great guy.

[810] He is the best, man. He's the best.

[811] I worked with him on something a couple years ago, and he said he was a fan of mine.

[812] And he keeps fucking calling me for projects, but he's so fucking cool.

[813] when we were doing because people have been when we did this show called Hollywood right we played uh we owned a dispensary in Hollywood it was a funny as um pilot and it was part of this rivet TV they had this process where a lot of you know you people do pilots they never get green lit they play the pilot and then you you pledge if you want to get the pilot to green light okay the company fell apart the fucking um the show did well we got Snoop dog retweeted that people were enjoying it and it just stopped.

[814] We just stopped it but he was so fucking cool.

[815] We did Hollywood when he sat down and talked to me. He said Donnell, I'm at a point in my life I'm at a stage in my life where I'm not going to do anything unless it's fun and it's what I want to do.

[816] Yeah.

[817] And that joint posted good.

[818] We didn't get a poppy, but it was a good time man and he threw me up in him Jay and Salibar reboot.

[819] Did you know him pre -weed?

[820] I knew of him pre -weed.

[821] I met him pre -weed.

[822] And then the second or third time we hung out, he started smoking weed.

[823] Really?

[824] I was like, what's going on?

[825] What happened?

[826] But was that after he had a heart attack?

[827] No, no, no, no, way before.

[828] He just went hard with weed, like out of nowhere.

[829] He was like, no weed and then all weed.

[830] Yeah, but creative people can get all weed.

[831] And I know his strand is like a hybrid sativa strand.

[832] Yeah.

[833] But it was just interesting to know him before when he wasn't smoking.

[834] And then, I mean, he's just, he's all day high.

[835] I'm good.

[836] Just put it in that.

[837] He's all day high.

[838] Yeah.

[839] He's one of those dudes.

[840] He's one of those like Wiz Khalifa type dudes.

[841] Those, uh...

[842] It didn't just start pounding out right and shit.

[843] Yeah.

[844] I used to go to his fucking crib.

[845] When we were, when we were working on Halloween, we got up to three other scripts.

[846] And I would just go up there and just chill.

[847] And I'm like, I can't believe.

[848] I'm chilling.

[849] Kevin Smith smoking the joint and we're just talking and the motherfucking and the goddamn keyboard is just going crazy.

[850] Yeah.

[851] Yeah, he's a genuine person.

[852] Very, very good person.

[853] Yep, and then shit, man. He set off.

[854] He did things nobody ever done.

[855] I mean, just to create a brand that could last for fucking 20, 25 years.

[856] As an independent filmmaker.

[857] Independent film like...

[858] Did you ever see that movie Red State that he did?

[859] I didn't do it.

[860] Did you ever see it?

[861] It was one of his best movies.

[862] It was weird, man. It was so strange because he didn't tell me anything about it because they just wanted you to see it.

[863] So we sat down, we watched it, and it was a horror movie.

[864] It's like it's a horror suspense thriller movie.

[865] It's not funny at all.

[866] It doesn't try to be funny at all.

[867] But did he tell you that it was?

[868] He didn't tell me shit.

[869] He literally didn't tell me anything, but I'm assuming it's a Kevin Smith movie.

[870] I'm assuming it's going to be fun, you know?

[871] But you know what?

[872] I mean, people like that, you know somewhere deep, Down the side, they're like, I want to do something fucking different from what people know me from.

[873] Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

[874] But once you get into something, you get into a groove and you're getting a brand and you're known for something you make money of it, why would you, you know, a lot of times, why would you roll the dice?

[875] I think he's just a creative guy.

[876] He just likes doing a thing.

[877] Like, he had a thought in his head to do this kind of movie.

[878] You know who else did that?

[879] Bob Cat Goldwaite.

[880] He made a Bigfoot movie, man, like a scary -ass Blair Witch Bigfoot movie.

[881] Do you know the history with him?

[882] The history with him?

[883] Bobcat.

[884] In what way?

[885] With the Chappelle Show?

[886] No, I don't.

[887] He was the first director of the first season of the Chappelle Show.

[888] When I did New York boobs, I ran into him.

[889] I ran into him and Dave.

[890] And then when you, it's so weird because you know him as crazy dude, right?

[891] And just to see his demeanor, wait from that, you just wait for him to have an outburst.

[892] But Bobcat was the first season director of Chappelle Show.

[893] He's a very thoughtful guy I like him a lot And the funny thing with him with me He liked me But he said my name wrong Every time he says it's about me He said where's Deereo Where is Dante?

[894] Yo where's Daniel What's dudeo?

[895] I was like After the fourth one I was like This gotta be racist He just named everything with a deed That was my name But he was the first director Of Chappelle show before Rusty Kandov took over.

[896] What is that movie he made, Jamie?

[897] What is it called again?

[898] Willow Creek?

[899] Is it Willow Creek?

[900] Yeah, I think it's Willow Creek.

[901] It's fucking good, man. I got to check it out.

[902] He's obsessed with Bigfoot.

[903] Bobcat believes in Bigfoot.

[904] Really?

[905] All in, I think.

[906] Or it's like a long running joke.

[907] It's like a documentary type of deal.

[908] He's so smart it might be a scam.

[909] I think he's telling the truth, though.

[910] I think he really is obsessed with Bigfoot.

[911] I knew he was a good actor when, I knew he was a good actor when I talked to him and him not being a character from me. I'm Police Academy.

[912] Because that, you know, not too many characters you ever see that.

[913] When you see their face, you want to hear a certain voice.

[914] Right.

[915] Anything else is disappointing.

[916] Yeah.

[917] He had a hard time with that when he started doing stand -up.

[918] Really?

[919] Yeah, because he started doing stand -up again.

[920] You know, he had done that Bobcat character forever, and then he started directing stuff.

[921] And remember he lit Jay Leno's couch on fire.

[922] Oh, what?

[923] On one of the episode of a show?

[924] He was on Tonight Show.

[925] He lit the fucking couch on fire.

[926] For whatever he said Man, he used to do interviews And just blaze it I've never seen anybody The only person Robin Williams used to do interviews like that Right Yeah, Bobcatser He was a wild man But he's a thoughtful person Like when you actually talk to him Like he'll ex, I mean He's got sort of an explanation That makes sense He just wanted to be a little wild And he didn't realize What a big deal it was going to be Because he murdered it Yeah.

[927] Yeah, he murdered that.

[928] But he's, um, he does a lot of different shit.

[929] When he was doing stand -up again, he wanted to just be himself.

[930] And there was a time where they were, they wanted him that those, ah -ha -ha -ha -ha.

[931] Yeah.

[932] They wanted that Bobcat character.

[933] That's a tough thing to pull away from, especially if it's like, you know, if it's how you're paying your bills.

[934] You know what I mean?

[935] Oh, for sure.

[936] You, it's like, who are we going to get the crazy dude?

[937] That's got to be a tough.

[938] A lot of people can't pull himself out of it.

[939] A lot of people can't reinvent himself like that.

[940] Right.

[941] Like if you're Gallagher, like everybody expects fruit, if you say, I'm just going to talk now.

[942] People are like, come on, bro, but we wanted to talk in the fruit.

[943] Yo, people like that have weird, weird crazy fetishes and shit, bro.

[944] It's like, he fucks with watermelons and then he likes looking at naked goats and shit.

[945] Something crazy of you that, wow.

[946] But Gallagher, you're going to see Gallagher.

[947] Anytime you see Gallagher, you're going to think watermelon for the rest of your life.

[948] Yeah, you're going to think Sledgehammer.

[949] you're going to think everybody's covered in plastic remember i remember that when we that we that we're not i hate to keep but you just said it when when i was with shepelsha and i used to pitch ideas and um they used to just throw my ideas like pop get that shit out of here nil used to i used to pitch ideas yeah and then the guy going to come down then the dude going to come and then somebody going to have a hat on right there going to come and they're going to shoot him and then he used to be like this pop he used to smack that shit out of here he was like do that shit 10 years ago son like my shit was so dated and I couldn't think of anything one day I was watching Comedy Central and Gallagher was on and for some reason Gallagher looked like Dave Chappelle to me and I was thinking because Dave like skateboards and shit I'd say in the skates and I just said and of course I was smoking the joint I said what if Gallagher was black I was like what if Gallagher was black I just said what if Gallagher was black that was my pitch line I said what look I said what What if Gallagher was black, right?

[950] And then I called Neil Brennan and I said, I got an idea.

[951] He said, what, son?

[952] I said, black Gallagher.

[953] And bam.

[954] Wow.

[955] I forgot about this character.

[956] Yep.

[957] Black Gallagher.

[958] Dude, you were on, without a doubt, the greatest sketch show in the history of the world.

[959] I mean, it lasted only a little while.

[960] But those are the classic sketches.

[961] There's some great sketches.

[962] It doesn't put anybody's down.

[963] I mean, obviously Saturday.

[964] and live has been around forever they had a lot of great sketches but it's hard to beat the black kKK dude it's hard to beat that it's like it's hard to beat that it's hard to beat that as an all -time sketch i don't even know what thought process you got to have to even yeah that was when that sketch is going on you're watching it go on yo whoa it felt like when that sketch dropped bro when that sketch dropped when that sketched drop i was like oh shit it was just like what are we talking about it's like one of the funniest things that's ever been captured on film when neil's head explodes yo what a great idea too it's just such a great idea a blind black kKK member and he just running around figure he's fucking white as shit oh and that shit still stays in front of fucking pop culture.

[965] It's just one of those things.

[966] It's going to be a Clayton Bigsby forever.

[967] Forever.

[968] There's a bunch of those.

[969] His Rick James one of the greatest sketches of all time.

[970] I remember when we were doing the wraparounds when you show the sketch to the audience and they played the Rick James sketch and every time we played it, the room just exploded.

[971] I mean it just exploded like, wow.

[972] Oh, my God.

[973] Yeah, it was, it was, you knew something different.

[974] You never know about, no one ever knew that it would go to the extent that it went, but you just knew something was big in that moment.

[975] Dude, there was a moment where, like, people would just yell out, I'm rich, bitch.

[976] They would just yell it out in shows.

[977] People would just yell it out.

[978] Yeah.

[979] Like, just kept yelling it out.

[980] I'm rich, bitch.

[981] There was like something, they wanted to say.

[982] They had to say it.

[983] Dude, that show had an impact.

[984] a crazy impact if you really stop and think about it it did it's amazing that someone somehow or another through whatever didn't keep that going i don't know what happened i don't either but god damn how do you not keep that going just back off yeah back off and film it and just let him do it what happened here how did you fuck that up let's get it how did you fuck that's how i felt when he did SNL a couple years ago, you know, I was like, it's like, that show is past, as in a lot of, everybody's doing different things, you know what I mean, but the show was so, the show is just so iconic, it's hard to forget about it, but it was like, um, if, if, if, when we did SNL, when he did, uh, walking dead spoof, when he did, Jamie, did you see that sketch?

[985] He did the, uh, walking, he did the spoof for the walking dead.

[986] I didn't see this.

[987] Oh, My God.

[988] And this is a recent thing?

[989] Oh, this was SNL.

[990] He won an Emmy for this.

[991] This was SNL like that.

[992] I didn't not see this.

[993] Two years ago, when this scene right here, man, I was saying to myself, this shit is like, because I hadn't seen him perform as a character actor since the Chappelle show.

[994] And he fucking bodied this.

[995] The beginning of this shit is ridiculous.

[996] It was funniest shit.

[997] That won an Emmy for, like, you know, I have a little special category, like, uh, special like a comedy special not the not the premier um emys but the you know the ones i'm talking about yeah that's that's a crazy scene to spoof too right that was a terrible remember that scene yeah and the walking dead but he did it that's like one of the most brutal scenes in all of television if you really stop and think about it like i couldn't believe what they showed like when they first episode out too of like the season right Right, I think so.

[998] They killed off two or three people.

[999] The one dude who they, what was his name?

[1000] Glenn that they kept hitting in the head and you can see his eyeball pop out.

[1001] I'm like, what are we doing here?

[1002] See, y 'all watch that gory shit.

[1003] I can't fuck with that.

[1004] I didn't fuck with it after that.

[1005] I was like, I didn't know who was insistent to this.

[1006] Yeah, but he made that shit funny.

[1007] That was some funny shit.

[1008] Yeah.

[1009] And if it was any glimpse of what would be, oh, man, he killed that, brought that back.

[1010] It was.

[1011] Well, you know, I mean, again, when you talk about all -time sketches.

[1012] It was fun, man. How many episodes did it do all total?

[1013] I don't know.

[1014] What would two and a half years be?

[1015] I don't know.

[1016] I would say probably 50 episodes maybe, if that, 50?

[1017] Wow.

[1018] Was it that many?

[1019] It was a lot.

[1020] And another part, not even the sketch, is the music, that the music, that would be a fucking dope -ass, fucking, show just to show the guest, young Kanye Common, Erica Badu, everybody used to stop through What a crazy fucking show Yep Do you think he's happy of doing that or he's happier Doing stand -up?

[1021] I think stand -up You know He shares a similar personality This similar personality that you share that I share To Joey Diaz shared That want to be on stage You just want to perform as a stand -up.

[1022] You know what I mean?

[1023] Like, I don't think, I can't speak for him.

[1024] I don't think it's important for him to be on TV.

[1025] I think it's important for him to be the best comedian he could be.

[1026] Right.

[1027] You know?

[1028] You know how you feel when you think you're working.

[1029] At the top of your game, you just hope everybody acknowledges it at the same time.

[1030] I think also, too, you know, he did it.

[1031] And now, you know, now he doesn't have anybody to answer to.

[1032] You know, he did it.

[1033] The show's done.

[1034] He did it.

[1035] Still, in my opinion, I think it's the greatest sketch comedy show of all time.

[1036] And then to do the things like, it's hard not to talk about him because, you know, he's what some people consider the greatest to ever do it.

[1037] You know what I'm saying?

[1038] Then you have a relationship with that person.

[1039] You know, you're not exploiting it, but it's just interesting, you know?

[1040] Like, I've seen his career go to the point where, and this is why I said the last special he did, sticks and stones, was so important for, comedy because critics and a couple of people were dictating the tone of comedy and had people second get some people second guessing themselves right you know what I mean I've heard I was hearing comedians like oh I want to say this but I don't feel comfortable I'm like what the fuck is happening you got to say what you want to say right you know and there was a there was a comic I won't mention their name but they wrote a critical article about Dave and sticks and stones and the thing that I found interesting it was that they were a comedian writing a critical article which is all fucked up right out the gate and I feel of you as a comedian if you don't know what specials like Sticks of Stone special and like with Bill Burr special what they do for the voice of comedy is saying this is what we do that's it stop you know well it seems like the expectations cultural expectations of how we shouldn't shouldn't talk about things they're shifting so quickly and people like demand compliance for you to you know behave a certain way but our profession we can't this is not a profession to comply it no no we don't do that it's also like this move towards compliance I don't I mean I think we should just be all nicer to each other I think this compliance is like something that people because they think they're right they think they're going to enforce their idea on people but it's like the worst way to talk to people because they immediately resist it.

[1041] Be nice.

[1042] Just be nice.

[1043] Just be nice.

[1044] Just be nice.

[1045] Motherfucking tell you this.

[1046] Joe, you probably had this.

[1047] Why?

[1048] Oh, why?

[1049] It's because I'm gay.

[1050] No, it's because you're an asshole.

[1051] Yes.

[1052] No, it has nothing to do about who dick you suck or any of that.

[1053] It's because you're an asshole.

[1054] You take the asshole out of anything.

[1055] Yes.

[1056] The asshole could be in anything.

[1057] It could be a gay.

[1058] It could be in white.

[1059] it could be in anything take the ass off and you said it yo just what is so hard joe about being nice what's so hard we could be better at it but yeah when i see you you're nice to me i try to be real nice to everybody yeah i've never felt that you're nice you know yeah that's all we got to do is be nice i think people's disagreements are far less than we think they are i think we get caught up in in this there's a fucking team thing that happens with people.

[1060] And we're seeing in this country right now when it comes to like ideology, are you on the right or are you on the left?

[1061] Just, you know, it's just a, it's a weird time.

[1062] There's a be nice.

[1063] Yeah.

[1064] Be nice.

[1065] Be nice.

[1066] Whatever side you on.

[1067] Just fucking be nice about it.

[1068] Yeah.

[1069] You don't got to be nasty about shit.

[1070] We're all Americans too.

[1071] I mean, it seems like we've gotten worse instead of better at like the two sides talking to each other.

[1072] I was at a function in D .C., and I was Jeff Breeland.

[1073] It's one of Donald Trump's right hand.

[1074] He's in that camp.

[1075] And then there was another guy met he was a White House correspondent, right?

[1076] And I'm in this party, and I'm talking both sides, right?

[1077] And I'm understanding both sides.

[1078] You know what I'm saying?

[1079] I understand.

[1080] I'm having a drink with this motherfucker.

[1081] And I'm having a drink with this motherfucker.

[1082] Right.

[1083] I'm doing a shot with him.

[1084] I'm doing a shot with him.

[1085] I understand it.

[1086] And even though your size differ, you don't have to be nasty.

[1087] Yeah.

[1088] Be nice.

[1089] Like you say, be fucking nice.

[1090] I think people have gotten these weird positions of just constantly interacting with people in negative ways.

[1091] It's like patterns.

[1092] Confrontation.

[1093] Yeah.

[1094] And then we think that, you know, this is a country divided.

[1095] I don't think it's as divided as everybody thinks it is.

[1096] I think the problem is people divide us.

[1097] You know, you have a guy who's your guy.

[1098] your guy gets voted in and you know you get excited about it and you go against the people who their woman or their guy didn't get voted in and you have this little conflict with each other and it's a stupid conflict it's a stupid conflict it's just dangerous because you're basing it on a team thing and if the problem is having a fucking president in the first place having government in the first place you seem like we need it but the problem is having anybody that's got control like that any one person of extreme power it doesn't make any sense It doesn't seem like it should be a thing anymore.

[1099] It seems like a thing we should have figured out was a problem a long fucking time ago.

[1100] But I don't think we would have been in a place where we feel like somebody with that power is abusing it.

[1101] And that's so interesting.

[1102] That's what's so interesting now.

[1103] Because, like, there's no way to deny some of the things that Donald Trump have done for America.

[1104] Some of the things he's done for the black community.

[1105] It's on paper and everything.

[1106] It's on paper.

[1107] You can see that one of stats is the lowest unemployment, whatever.

[1108] but jobs always been here is just if a motherfucker want to go get a job or not do you understand that like how does how does someone increase jobs do they provide government jobs or do they open up avenues for businesses make it easier for businesses to succeed I think it's businesses and I think you got to create a certain mindset right but when someone says like we added jobs I wonder how how you make that direct connection between their policies I don't think that I think you inspired you can I think you can inspire movement of jobs because jobs are always you could be like like I don't know like little language like hey we're been hiring we're starting to hire down at the coal mine or whatever you know I'm saying like you can inspire people to get jobs that are already there one of the things I really hate is that almost everybody feels like they have to get into these uh ideological arguments right now because we got such a strange president such a polarizing president just what I don't understand about motherfuckers when it come to Trump how y 'all motherfuckers still letting him make you mad like like yo i'm telling you son sometimes i wake up i'm on seeing it i'm like okay we get it you know what i'm saying like come on man yeah the other thing is i mean i don't understand how people are keep getting mad about the same shit you know a person's character you know how you think they feel about them and you continue to let them make you mad like they can make you upset it makes no sense well everybody knew who he was before we got in there too Everybody knew he was.

[1109] But is he doing good things economically?

[1110] I don't know.

[1111] That could be an argument.

[1112] I don't understand it.

[1113] That could be an argument that he could win because he got numbers.

[1114] That's an argument he could win.

[1115] How does that work, though?

[1116] The way it's always, I know I sound like a moron to anybody who understands economics, but I've always heard that there's basically patterns that they can almost predict where economies rise and fall.

[1117] And a lot of it is based on policies they enact, but a lot of it is based on just things.

[1118] you know have like natural cycles to them almost right and sometimes it has to turn sometimes shit is on the way up because of things that a president did and then this new president catches the wave like you always hear that right but that was the case and that's the case with that's the case that's the case that's the case with Obama and it shifted to Trump and everything and you know Trump won you run fair and scare however you want to feel about it you know I mean the the the the motherfucker One, but people getting upset, people getting angry because somebody chose to vote for somebody.

[1119] That's the dumbest shit ever.

[1120] With my lifetime, it seems like this is the most polarizing people are versus Trump supporters or not supporters.

[1121] It's the most polarizing.

[1122] You know, you're either with them or you're not.

[1123] You know, it's like there's a culture battle going on.

[1124] got to be angry We're a culture battle No, you don't have to be angry Most of us are wasting A lot of fucking energy Man, if you can't correct it If you don't know Who the next Superman is going to be Just shut the fuck up about it You know what I'm saying?

[1125] Like you keep on man It's like you keep on You keep on Just find out Who is going to be Mayor Bloomberg said Man he looked at the field And said fuck None of these motherfuckers Can beat Trump I may have to run Yeah he's going to jump in it And he's a data He's a numbers guy.

[1126] Yeah, he must know.

[1127] Like, if you're not going to, like, it's just senseless to continue to be mad.

[1128] It's just so weird right now.

[1129] People are saying people want to take away people's guns and people saying they'll fight to keep their guns.

[1130] Like, what are we talking about here?

[1131] Man, I don't even know.

[1132] A lot of my friends don't even know the argument of guns.

[1133] Because when we see a gun is never in a place where it's a gun law.

[1134] You know what I'm saying?

[1135] The first time I went to Ohio, bro, and I was going to department stores and shit, and they had signs outside to say no guns allowed, right?

[1136] They had signs, like no smoking, like no guns.

[1137] And I'm saying to myself, wait a minute, motherfuckers have guns where you have to tell them not to bring them in here?

[1138] There's a lot of guns out there.

[1139] There's certain places where you have, like, Arizona, I think, is an open carry state.

[1140] That's always going to be scary to me. That is wild, wild west shit.

[1141] I bet that cuts down on road rage, though.

[1142] Cuts down on everything.

[1143] That's the thing.

[1144] Is that okay, though?

[1145] Are you happy with this crazy armed society where everybody's nice because everybody's got a gun on them at all times?

[1146] I mean, just don't pop the shot, man. I know that shit.

[1147] I wish we didn't need that.

[1148] I wish people were just nice.

[1149] Yeah, and I don't even know if that's really needed as much as you have the right to do.

[1150] You know, some people just, they love to exercise.

[1151] their right to bear arms.

[1152] You have to right to bear arms, but you don't have to bear an arm.

[1153] Some people love guns.

[1154] They love them.

[1155] They can't wait to shoot them.

[1156] Bang, bang, bang.

[1157] They can't wait to fix them.

[1158] They want to polish them and clean them and they want to add new ones to their collection and bang, bang, bang.

[1159] And they get good at using them.

[1160] And they just want to just...

[1161] Ooh.

[1162] Some of them are lovely people.

[1163] They're really nice people.

[1164] It's not a knock against them.

[1165] I get it.

[1166] I can see myself getting really into guns.

[1167] That's a problem.

[1168] Not really.

[1169] but it's it's they're fun okay going to a range and shoot at metal targets is fun and it's it's something where it could conceivably in this life it's it's possible and it's happen to other people where you had to save your life right I understand with a gun that's real but a lot of people don't want to they want to deny that yeah much rather if that was not true I would much rather that but it seems to be true that sometimes people do break into people's houses and sometimes those people defend themselves.

[1170] I wish nobody broke into anybody's fucking house.

[1171] I really do.

[1172] And I wish nobody had to shoot anybody that broke into their house.

[1173] I really do.

[1174] But we can't deny that that's a thing.

[1175] We can't deny that people have saved their lives with guns because some of them have.

[1176] And we can't deny also that I know this sounds crazy too.

[1177] And this is how black people look at guns.

[1178] A lot of black people have lost their lives to guns.

[1179] And they've lost their lives to guns with people of authority you know what I'm saying so when it comes to guns with black people I can't speak for everybody but that's a really strong place where to distress in the whole system of a gun for a black person to feel makes total sense you know what I'm saying even with cases I'm not trying to get radical anything we're having a conversation even in cases where there's a young black man that had a license and was legit by law he could carry a gun and he still at the end of the day was the victim of what people can consider to be an overzealous police officer or unqualified police officer or untrained police officer but that's how that's how a lot of black people see guns and the other side of black people see guns is they use it to commit crimes themselves you know but it's when you when you're talking about gun like even when you're saying you're talking about you're talking about the way that people know the NRA They know gun laws.

[1180] Half the motherfuckers in these different states don't even know how easy it is to be able to have a gun.

[1181] Dave Chappelle said it, and it was a funny joke, and it means a lot.

[1182] He said, you really want to change the gun laws?

[1183] Have every black person in Ohio register to have a gun and see how quick the gun laws would change that.

[1184] You see all these things with guns.

[1185] They'd be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, we got to do something.

[1186] something about this shit, man. That's the only way I can see you can effectively change it.

[1187] But it's different, different arguments on the whole thought of guns with different people.

[1188] I see both sides.

[1189] I want to be able to protect myself.

[1190] Yeah, I'm sure.

[1191] But then you've got to ask yourself, what environment are you living in where you have to actually, I'm just trying to, where you have to actually protect yourself and where you live where there's a chance that you could be in a parking lot and your Walmart car bumps the car and next thing you know it's the shootout that's a mindset that is a mindset that's a mindset damn shootouts are that mean preparing for shootouts Jesus Christ I always have a scenario always have a shootout scenario I know but everybody would agree wouldn't it be better if we just didn't do that Yeah, 100%.

[1192] People didn't ever put themselves in a position where you were going to have to shoot them.

[1193] That goes back to what you said earlier.

[1194] Had to be nice.

[1195] Yeah.

[1196] Just be nice.

[1197] Yeah, I don't want to be in a situation where someone had to think about shooting me. Exactly.

[1198] I know where those places are.

[1199] That's the problem with being nice, right?

[1200] There's places where people are stuck in these crime -bidden environment.

[1201] and it doesn't seem like there's any way out.

[1202] That's what the problem with being nice is.

[1203] They're sometimes you can't survive.

[1204] Yeah, they either got to get out or you can't go there.

[1205] And you can go to it sometimes, but after a while you have to, um, you have to show people another side, you know?

[1206] You got to show people another side.

[1207] You have to, you know.

[1208] People can, you said it before, people make excuses, but eventually you got to say to yourself, what can I really do to change the cycle?

[1209] Yeah.

[1210] And you've got to work at it.

[1211] What do you think anybody could do to change the cycle?

[1212] Like, when you see impoverished neighborhoods that are the same way from the 1970s as they are in 2019, how do you fix that?

[1213] Do you ever thought about it?

[1214] It's a tough thing to fix.

[1215] I think you have to, people have to see other images.

[1216] People have to see other images.

[1217] You could brainwash people with advertisement.

[1218] You know, people have to see other images.

[1219] They have to see, they have to see other things.

[1220] You have to show them something.

[1221] that they don't you got to show them success some examples you got to show them examples those people that have made it they really got to really care and get involved they got to be around they got to be able to see something different because most most kids in the inner city whatever they dream about it they dream about it and then when a couple make through when a couple people do good we don't put the energy into supporting them and recreating them we put the energy into other stupid shit opposed to actually honoring this a person that broke through a politician you know what I mean and and get with them and they kids have to see that they have to see that this is possible they have to see it's possible yeah have to see it's possible yeah people need to think that they've got hope and that's if you're in a spot where you're stuck in a crime -ridden community that's probably the worst place you could be as a young person in this country.

[1222] It's tough.

[1223] Some people make it out of it, a lot of people don't.

[1224] Some people make it out of it, a lot of people don't.

[1225] But how often is that addressed when they talk about, like if someone talks about running for government, has anybody ever had a real feasible idea how to fix that?

[1226] How to like take all these impoverished in inner city communities, what we know have been crime -ridden for decades and stop it.

[1227] How How do you stop it?

[1228] What do you do?

[1229] What's the plan?

[1230] How do you go in there?

[1231] How much money would it take?

[1232] How much money would it take to take all of the, take one city, Detroit, impoverished communities in Detroit and bring it up?

[1233] What would you have to do?

[1234] How would you have to fix this?

[1235] How would you have to have community centers?

[1236] How much would it cost to have counseling and guidance and a positive community, like foster a positive community with people that are like professional, like, psychologists and healthcare workers and doctors and people that can talk to kids and tell them about potential careers and things that they can do and that there's ways out and then foster them into community programs that can get them tutoring to give them a little bit of a bump before they can go to college all these different things that just don't exist it's a lot of it don't exist but it's got to start at home it has to start at home it has to right it has to be because you can make all the plans programs you want somebody has enforcement they have to enforce it a teacher can have the best lesson plan and the best curriculum of ever of she can win teacher of the year or whatever you know what I'm saying but what if she's teaching and what she's trying to get them to understand if it's not reinforced at home then it goes nowhere right you know and it's like the I don't even know how do you address the mindset of parents or some people aren't supposed to be parents but that's what everything starts yeah well everything starts there I think some people it's a cycle right some people had parents that were unqualified to have them and then they became unqualified to have their own parents and whether or not they should or shouldn't be responsible we could all agree they should be responsible they're not those kids a lot of times are the ones that get fucked over in life they get a bad start yeah but if if there was some way some way through some sort of a community program to ensure that these kids always had a place that felt like a community felt like family they can go there it's safe there's always got somebody somebody there they can handle them and take care of them but man motherfuckers got get rid of mentality of fucking their own shit up, man. That's one thing.

[1237] They fuck their own shit up sometime, man. Like, everything you're saying like Nipsey Hustle, the rapper that passed away that was well respected, a hip -hop, all across the board.

[1238] He was an example of everything that you're saying.

[1239] He was an example of how to fix it.

[1240] He was an example of everything that you said he was doing, getting people up on their finances.

[1241] He had a realty company out of the the marathon clothing shopping mall he had.

[1242] He employed people that came out of prison, people that didn't have a fair shake in life.

[1243] You know what I'm saying?

[1244] He donated to the community.

[1245] He had kids in his videos.

[1246] He was doing everything.

[1247] He was trying to explain to people how important it is to have business by property.

[1248] He knew where his store was.

[1249] A train line was going to come in soon.

[1250] So all the property he bought around and he knew how much it was going to be worth.

[1251] Then he tried to pass that knowledge on to a lot of people.

[1252] He passed it on through his music.

[1253] He passed on how he lived his life.

[1254] He passed on by his associations.

[1255] He gave everything.

[1256] He didn't leave the fucking hood.

[1257] He stayed in the hood.

[1258] He built his name in the hood.

[1259] He came from a place where people was comparing him to Snoop Dog right out the gate.

[1260] He snooped out, blah, blah, bah.

[1261] He had to beat through that shit.

[1262] He was selling his own shit.

[1263] He recording his own.

[1264] He's doing his own shit.

[1265] He won't leave the fucking hood.

[1266] He's letting people see his life.

[1267] he's letting people see his motherfucking life and with all that said in his parking lot in his hood another nigger shot him to death and that's fucked up that's the type of shit make me be frustrated about being black sometime god damn nigger and then you wonder why people say this about you our community needs to check motherfuckers and get garbage and rodents and roaches like that motherfucker out of here.

[1268] As much as we trying to figure out the problem as much as we can put a million people in a fucking room and write okay, this legislation blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah man if motherfuckers don't start fucking their own shit up and nobody ever going to fucking care what's the biggest place in the world that we've tried to rebuild city wise is it like iraq i mean have they really tried to rebuild iraq i mean what did they do once we took over i know very little about how much money has really been pumped in i know it's been an extraordinary amount but how much money do you think's been pumped into like iraq have you had a guess so i there was that protest going on there last week i thought we were supposed to be pulling out of iraq we pulled out of chicago now I'm sorry, son.

[1269] I was turning, but I just...

[1270] More deaths in Chicago.

[1271] Always more deaths in Chicago.

[1272] And motherfuckers neat, man. That's the part of the point I'm making, man. It's a whole mindset.

[1273] That was a part of my point.

[1274] It was like, what if they just cut that money in half?

[1275] Whatever they're doing over there and just put it all in the shit.

[1276] Put it all in places like Detroit, Chicago, any place that's overrun with crime and violence.

[1277] If they put the kind of money that they put into other countries.

[1278] But then, yeah, they do, but I think America things like this, okay, what is my investment?

[1279] What is my investment?

[1280] They'll give it up, but what do they get out of return?

[1281] They get more successful people.

[1282] More successful people contribute more to the society.

[1283] It's better for everybody.

[1284] The more successful people we have, if we're a community, we all agree.

[1285] The United States is a community.

[1286] If we're all community, we'd be better served, all of us would be, if more people were successful.

[1287] If more people were doing well, there'd be more money for the economy.

[1288] That makes sense?

[1289] Yeah, it's possible.

[1290] There's a drain when people aren't doing as well.

[1291] Then that's education.

[1292] Yes, it's education.

[1293] It's inspiration.

[1294] It's people showing you, guiding you, people showing you the steps that you can take.

[1295] People that have done those steps themselves.

[1296] There's a lot of people out there that can do that.

[1297] I think, and it's a movement, man, because like a couple of my friends, DJ Envy and Caesar, they, they, they, they, they, they're on radio.

[1298] Cesar is a real estate guy.

[1299] And they've, they've been out like really trying to educate people on importance of creating generational wealth.

[1300] Yeah.

[1301] You know, real estate and just being a different, being a different person, you know?

[1302] I think we all need mentors.

[1303] We all need mentors.

[1304] We need someone who understands what it is we're talking about to sort of help us and guide us through.

[1305] And as comics, we all are silent mentors to each other, a lot of it.

[1306] Because, like, you'll ask a guy, how'd you set that up?

[1307] Like, why did you switch it that way?

[1308] Oh, they saw it coming this way.

[1309] But this way they don't see it coming.

[1310] Those conversations?

[1311] It's so interesting.

[1312] You said that with the mentor, one of my mentors named Fat Doctor.

[1313] He's out of Washington, D .C. It's a great name.

[1314] Fat Doctor.

[1315] Fat Doctor in the 80s, Fat Doctors was dope as shit, Joe.

[1316] You know, like, and for, like, back then, like, he was a black comic.

[1317] There was mainstream.

[1318] He did the black rooms and he do white rooms.

[1319] Richard Price said it was one of his favorite comedians.

[1320] And Fat Doctor, he was, he was, and he was just like he was because he's not really doing good right now.

[1321] You know, like, it's, you know.

[1322] Health -wise.

[1323] Yeah.

[1324] and he was that mentor to me he was that mentor to Martin Lawrence he was that mentor to Tony Woods he's one of those guys that like if you know DC if you know fat doctor every comic has some piece of fat doctor somewhere whether it's being that motherfucker they can work a black room in a white room whether it's being that dude that can fucking just demolish a fucking room everybody had a piece of him you know and he's not doing well you know but I'm just giving them a shout out beautiful I'm sorry to hear that and shout out to Tony Woods I haven't heard that name in a little bit Tony I love that guy he's a funny guy yeah he just did a write -up in him in the New York time talking about his lineage to DC comedy and people he worked when everything and Tony's one of those dudes that you know if you mention a certain city or something like oh Detroit or DC you like Tony Wood for a doctor right right right And all those guys, yeah.

[1325] Tony Woods is a funny, funny, funny, funny comic, man. I always remember watching him in New York.

[1326] He's been funny for years.

[1327] I was surprised that more people don't know who he is.

[1328] Like when I talked to comics, you know, even comics might not even know.

[1329] He did a lot of stuff.

[1330] He got, you know, with whatever we do, you know, we got to go with money is.

[1331] I think a lot of part of his career was like a lot of his money was overseas.

[1332] He was very popular overseas, so, you know, you got to get your cash where you can get it.

[1333] an elite motherfucker though his comedy's always top -notch yeah always yeah he's got a smooth style too man like a very unique style of delivery that was um one of shappelle's mentors when he came up yeah we all have to have those right yeah like for me in boston a lot of it was lenny clark who I'm still friends with there was these guys who were these Boston killers you know that would headline at nick's comedy stop and all those comedy clubs stitches and all those places there was like the Mount Rushmore of Boston comedy They were nice to everybody They told us what to do Like hey you gotta write more Hey you gotta stop saying fuck so much You say fuck too much kid You broke the fuck meter Like oh the fuck meter Like they would tell you Like if you say fuck all the time It doesn't mean anything It doesn't mean But if you say it when you need it Bang That it's like what the fuck Boom it means something now Because you know You only said it once And they would tell you You know about like What's a hack premise Like you might think You thought of that yourself But a hundred other comments also have thought of that same shit.

[1334] And what makes you different?

[1335] What makes you different?

[1336] What makes you different from everything else?

[1337] That's how fat doctor was.

[1338] He took me through the trenches.

[1339] Okay, I was funny.

[1340] Yeah, you're funny, but you curse too much.

[1341] Did I stop cursing?

[1342] You're cursing, but you only got five minutes.

[1343] Did I have 10 minutes?

[1344] You got 10 minutes, but you can't do clean.

[1345] It was like they always going to have something to test you with.

[1346] But I know Fat Doctor, he always used to say, no matter what we do in this game and we all have problems.

[1347] He said, when you go on stage, you put the problem to the side, you do your show and then you pick it back up when you're ready to leave you always got to pick it back up yeah but i wish him well and i hope he does it gets better yeah i wish him well too is he's shit online can i see his stuff is on youtube yeah he probably got something deep down in youtube deep down in youtube but he's one of those guys that we knew for years we all have mentors there's no i mean even guys who just you watch them fabulous fat doctor there is even guys that you uh you know even know them well but you watch them all the time like if you work at the store you know you get to see like uh jesson that could go up over and over and over again tighten up his shit like even if you don't know him well like you kind of if you're a young comic work in the door you're kind of getting mentor just watch that guy tweak his act and change it oh i like how he did that martin used to watch that was his mentor before martin did star says they were like they were like really cool and and and fat doctor took him on his wing just like it took a lot of us on his wings and tell you those little jokes, those little things that help you.

[1348] In fact, I think when Martin first got to show Martin, the fact that I was out here, I think he wrote in a couple episodes.

[1349] Dude, some of the worst bombings I ever had in my life had to follow Martin in the 90s.

[1350] Oh, man, I can't imagine Martin in the 90s.

[1351] I was terrible, and he was on fire.

[1352] Nothing was hotter.

[1353] Nothing.

[1354] I remember, I don't know if I told you the story.

[1355] I remember, I remember I was in D .C. I was in bed with this chick.

[1356] and we were watching HBO whatever and this is when HBO specials were HBO specials right and it was like HBO special and they said give it up Martin Lawrence and Martin Lawrence came out there I don't know if I said this he said when you give it up for a brother making money the right way when you make it money the right way you can tell your lady shit like shut the fuck up he said and she'll shut up too she'd be like oh you so crazy man let me tell you something I was in the bed I stood up I like this.

[1357] I said, who the fuck is that motherfucker?

[1358] Yo, I was like, and he came out, like, you know, he came out like, when specials was like, specials was really special.

[1359] Like, they came once a year, twice a year.

[1360] And then it was usually with some big HBO production.

[1361] You knew it was coming out, post, you know?

[1362] And he said, you can tell you ladies shit, like, shut the fuck up.

[1363] And she'd be like, you're so crazy.

[1364] It was like, boom.

[1365] And it was off to the fucking racist.

[1366] That's what inspired you.

[1367] That's what, that inspired me. That made me. And then I saw him at the Common Connection of Greenbelt.

[1368] It was a little small spotting Greenbelt.

[1369] This was where we all started.

[1370] I saw him there live.

[1371] It's a little piece of shop that make it to a comedy room.

[1372] It only holds like 110 people.

[1373] Wow.

[1374] And I was in a fucking front row like this, bro.

[1375] I was like this.

[1376] And Martin was on fire.

[1377] And I was watch, I was like, this nigga saying all this shit, I want to say.

[1378] Yo, I'm like, I'm like, I was like, he's just saying some regular shit and it's funny.

[1379] Like, he's just saying some regular shit, some everyday shit, and it's just funny.

[1380] And I was like this man, I want to do this shit.

[1381] Wow.

[1382] Yep.

[1383] I was like, I would like, and I wouldn't even, I was fucking around and open, bullshit, open money, just heckling and I said, I want to do this shit.

[1384] And it was Martin, Martin fucking used to tear rooms up.

[1385] used to destroy it was terrifying he's on tour i'm on tour with him next year really a what is it a e g a e g the touring joint they thought it's the last year they did it's called the lit as fuck tour martin lords is the host of the lit is fuck to him oh that's great that's beautiful yeah they announced it recently and i'm gonna do some dates coming up i'm excited just to be a dude from dc that's like bucket list shit he's one of the rare leather suit guys right he's wore I think he gave it up, though.

[1386] I think he gave it up.

[1387] You know, everybody wore leather.

[1388] When you get that first check, you got to put some leather on, son.

[1389] Look at him.

[1390] Yes, that was the fucking outfit, son.

[1391] Full leather poncho.

[1392] Full leather.

[1393] That must have been so sweaty.

[1394] Not only that, but I'm just, I mean, think of it.

[1395] Like, you got to ask yourself, what the fuck was he thinking?

[1396] But he was in the moment.

[1397] He was in the moment.

[1398] But that was it.

[1399] You so, motherfucker.

[1400] That shit set it off.

[1401] That was amazing.

[1402] So that was around the.

[1403] time when he was coming to the comedy store to work out his shit oh yeah and i was going on after him it was death i know that rooms those rooms had to be people just get up like 90 % of the people would get up the soon you so crazy was like there was that was when it comes to like uh uh like hashtags and shit yeah and phrases you so crazy probably would fucking um go against a rich bitch back in the 90s yeah probably if they had hashtags back then and nothing was funnier than Martin Not on TV.

[1404] He just had this energy, man. And he would play different characters.

[1405] Yeah, he was...

[1406] I was dating this girl, and I had to break up with it because she said Martin Lawrence was corny.

[1407] I was like, bitch, I said, look, this is not going to work.

[1408] I was like, there is nothing else to talk about.

[1409] Like, this is a rap.

[1410] What the fuck are you talking about, son?

[1411] Yep, I was like, nah, that's over.

[1412] Especially in the 90s.

[1413] I'm telling you.

[1414] I got to watch it live.

[1415] it was one of those things where he was on fire he was just in his own it was when martin was at his top you know what you know think about it think about it um you know some uh comics are hot but it's one thing we know they're hot and didn't they like they got a hot tv show yep you know what's like it's like hot movies yeah it's like just popping man yeah i mean and i can't imagine and they come into the store with will smith it's coming out he they're doing what is the third one yeah i mean he's doing an action fucking movie too with the biggest name yeah What?

[1416] He did what?

[1417] He did a TV show.

[1418] He did a fucking action movie with Will Smith.

[1419] He's doing comedy specials and I'm telling you, like it was for me as a kid, you know, who started in Boston, I'd only been doing comedy for six years by the time I was out here already.

[1420] And when I was out here and I'm working at the store, six years in, and I got to go on after Martin Lawrence.

[1421] And I got to watch him, though, just to be in the room watching a legit comedy superstar, you know, six years in, like watching him, like, I'm like, I'm I'm watching them all the time.

[1422] I watch them 10, 15 shows.

[1423] Just murder, man. Just a razor's edge.

[1424] How'd you feel going to, how'd you handle it?

[1425] How'd you handle it?

[1426] Terrified.

[1427] Just ate shit most of the time.

[1428] Dude, I don't think I had a good set.

[1429] I think just get rid of like, yeah, did I just say it?

[1430] No, no, no, no, no, no. That's hilarious.

[1431] I ate shit pretty much every time I went on after him.

[1432] You couldn't transfer the energy?

[1433] They didn't want to hear it.

[1434] They didn't want to hear it.

[1435] He was so good.

[1436] He was so good and I was so bad.

[1437] Wasn't one of them joints when a motherfucker.

[1438] Yo, the funny thing is when you do that shit.

[1439] And, like, I go some places with Dave and, like, he'll get on stage.

[1440] Then the whole crowd just leave the fucking stage.

[1441] I mean, leave the room.

[1442] Like, fuck it.

[1443] This has to be over now.

[1444] That's funny.

[1445] Yep.

[1446] Yeah, man. I mean, nobody starts out great.

[1447] If you had to go back.

[1448] I started off.

[1449] I started off great, Joe.

[1450] Did you?

[1451] I did.

[1452] From the jump?

[1453] I swear to God.

[1454] You never had a dull spot?

[1455] Let me tell you, it was, I was five months in.

[1456] That's amazing.

[1457] I came through, I just was like, I had already been just practicing my whole fucking life, not on jokes, just fucking with motherfuckers.

[1458] And all I had to do is figure out a way to make that into a bit.

[1459] But no, I hit that shit hard.

[1460] Well, it doesn't seem like it's an art form, but it definitely is.

[1461] Because when someone talks shit to somebody really well and everybody's like, we're all laughing, like, if you can do that to a room full of guys, It's like five guys sitting around talking chat And one guy says something That's so ruthless That all of us are on the floor Dying That's it That is stand -up comedy You're just doing stand -up comedy For five guys You just need a different platform I tell any It's so weird Because I'll meet people And I'm like You should do comedy Like oh I bet you tell it No you know how certain energy You could tell Certain energy You're like You know what Certain people you see And you're like You know what I will love to see you try it One time Yeah yeah You know what I'm saying I know exactly You know what I mean Like, no, I'm not saying this is a career or anything, but if you ever thought about it, why not just fucking, you never know?

[1462] Yeah, you do never know.

[1463] I encourage too many people to do too many things.

[1464] I encourage everybody to start a podcast.

[1465] I encourage everybody to do stand up.

[1466] I do it all the time.

[1467] And people will get mad at me going, you shouldn't encourage everybody to do it.

[1468] But if you try it, you might be good at it.

[1469] Like, it's not a special talent in the sense that, like, if, you.

[1470] Like, if you can't run fast, you're not going to win at track and field.

[1471] You're just not.

[1472] You're just not.

[1473] But almost anybody who thinks they're funny, who loves comedy, who's got a sense of humor and is smart, can at least make some attempts at stand -up.

[1474] And I think if you can just get a little bit of traction, get going a little bit, you can get better.

[1475] Everybody's got a different pace.

[1476] Your pace was faster because you had been talking shit your whole life.

[1477] But other guys, like, were more silent and introverted.

[1478] It took them a little while to get their thing going.

[1479] But if they can do it, I always encourage people to do it.

[1480] do it they got to keep doing it yes you gotta keep you can't just like this you know like that guy my friend it's the grind some people can't grind i started i started i you know i didn't start my podcast start started but i recorded one today wow by myself it's happening for 44 minutes do you just do a bill burr style the reason why i did the reason why the reason why the reason why i did it because I didn't want you to just talk shit to me. I was like this.

[1481] I was like, this motherfucker got a knockout punch.

[1482] But listen, you're so good.

[1483] You're so good on podcasts.

[1484] For you to not have a podcast is an atrocity.

[1485] But I did it for four.

[1486] This is the first time in my life.

[1487] I talked for 45 minutes with nobody else but myself.

[1488] Perfect.

[1489] This is the first time I ever did that.

[1490] It's easy for you.

[1491] You could stay in this room for three hours and just go.

[1492] I'm way better off with people.

[1493] But you could do it.

[1494] Like, you could go to distance.

[1495] You could just do whatever.

[1496] but it's a thing that you get better at doing that's all it is it's like everything else like being on a pot like doing podcast is a thing that gets you you get better at being on a podcast you get better at doing it i think i'm i've i have fun yeah you're gonna be perfect at it it's your thing i was scared of shit son but i knew i couldn't come in here listen i knew i couldn't come in here but now i'll show you the time line i was like a year ago i knew it wasn't a year son it was like five months ago sir and every time i see you i just be wanting to say what's up And then he's like stretching out and shit he's like, what's up with that podcast?

[1497] I'm like, man, I try to skip this.

[1498] I'm saying, you know my son has a birthday?

[1499] Yeah, that's cool.

[1500] Everybody has a birthday.

[1501] What's up with that podcast, man. This is what I say.

[1502] This is whatever.

[1503] And I really mean it.

[1504] One of the reasons why I encourage every comic to do it because if you just put some energy into it, you have a thing that's all you.

[1505] And if it's successful, it's all you.

[1506] It's you.

[1507] It's like you and you don't have to worry about getting fired.

[1508] You don't have to worry about people being mad at you.

[1509] It's you putting out You know it's me, but me now used to talking to himself But you could talk to a friend I don't, I didn't have a friend then, son I'm your friend I'm your friend You don't want to talk to me I do I would talk to you on yours first All right And then we can come and do mine second Or vice versa I did one today I did one today How about we do one today I just did one Okay I just did one I got 44 minutes Okay I did one And I'm gonna tell you It started off I don't know I was honest Listen I want you to critique it sir okay you gotta critique it sir okay i'm i just i think you just gotta put them out i am if the first ones aren't your favorite ones it doesn't matter but that made me i'm gonna tell you i felt i was excited because you wouldn't be able to talk shit to me i was i was like fuck that fuck that shit i was excited you wasn't gonna talk shit you took it on podcast and i excited that i got 44 minutes of me talking that's beautiful and this is a start and i'm telling the truth yeah if you go back and listen to the early burr ones he would do it on a phone he would like make a phone call to a place and like it would be him on the phone it wasn't even like a recorder on his phone like this bill berr's first ones he was doing way back before there was like an app on your phone that you could record on yeah yeah and he was just talking shit about people at the airport just talking shit about this guy look at this fucking guy oh really see that's what I want to I just want to talk shit son I just want to talk shit well you're a fucking master at it man you 100 % should have a podcast 44 minutes when the more people do it the more comics do it, the more it empowers all of you.

[1510] All right, what do I got to do now?

[1511] All you just got to get it I got 44 minutes.

[1512] You need an account where you can get an RSS feed.

[1513] Someone's, we'll help you.

[1514] Don't panic.

[1515] I want to do it now.

[1516] Come on, man. We'll help you.

[1517] You're going to do it, man. You're not going to help me. Jamie's going to help you.

[1518] Jamie, could you produce my first one?

[1519] That's all I asked.

[1520] Can I get one?

[1521] Yes, yes.

[1522] Can I get one, Jamie?

[1523] We'll do it.

[1524] You can do it.

[1525] You can do it.

[1526] We'll do it.

[1527] Come on Jamie.

[1528] Don't worry.

[1529] I'll take care of it.

[1530] Donnell.

[1531] Is that a yes or no?

[1532] Yes.

[1533] No, man. We said yes.

[1534] We got it.

[1535] We got it.

[1536] We got it.

[1537] We got you.

[1538] All right.

[1539] The first one.

[1540] I got 44 minutes.

[1541] I'm an air dropping it to you.

[1542] It's super easy to set up.

[1543] So you just have to upload one every week.

[1544] It'll be easy.

[1545] All right.

[1546] We'll get it started.

[1547] You promise, right?

[1548] But 100 % him and me. Okay.

[1549] We're going to go through this together.

[1550] Don't forget me, son.

[1551] I'm not forgetting you.

[1552] I'm going to do more, but I got one ready, son.

[1553] You're going to do more.

[1554] I'm going to help you.

[1555] I was honest.

[1556] Good, beautiful.

[1557] I love you, son.

[1558] I love you, too, man. I get happy when I see you, man. I get happy when I see you, too.

[1559] I'm like, God, this I can be working out everywhere I go.

[1560] This motherfucker's everywhere.

[1561] You at every club, son.

[1562] You got to work.

[1563] How can you now win?

[1564] You got to work.

[1565] Yeah.

[1566] I mean, don't you think?

[1567] I mean, that's the thing.

[1568] Just put in those numbers.

[1569] How can you?

[1570] And it's so funny because.

[1571] And be nice.

[1572] Be nice.

[1573] Because when we did that show, like, we all did a good job, right?

[1574] Yeah.

[1575] But it felt good because we knew, like, we had put the reps in.

[1576] Yeah.

[1577] You know what I'm saying?

[1578] It wasn't like this like swinging haymakers.

[1579] It's like no, motherfucker.

[1580] We got it toned down.

[1581] I got this shit.

[1582] Yeah.

[1583] Even when we did the Utah joint, yep, that was so dope because, you know, we did the first one.

[1584] Ashley, you, I mean, Ashley and the U. And then they had the intermission that me and Dave.

[1585] And then on the Utah joint, it was daytime.

[1586] Right, that's right.

[1587] You know, it started out during the day.

[1588] I told them to wait.

[1589] I'm like, what are we doing?

[1590] They didn't wait, right?

[1591] So I'm like this.

[1592] because I had just experienced something similar the year before with Frankie Beverly and Maze.

[1593] Basically, motherfuckers went there and it was daytime, you know?

[1594] And I was like this, you can't give Joe a motherfucker daytime audience.

[1595] Like, it's the backstage of the festival or something shit, right?

[1596] I was like, oh, man, this shit got to get dark.

[1597] And I went on then, and it got dark and fucking you went up there, ate that shit up, son.

[1598] It was fun.

[1599] It was amazing.

[1600] Those gigs were special, man. Like, they felt like, they felt historic.

[1601] They felt like we were doing something really fun Yeah You know Which one is this Utah one Oh Utah was beautiful They were both beautiful Look at that shit Yeah The sky and everything above it It was perfect They were both beautiful I fucking love Utah man I like going there Look at that shit sir Look at that Bam But you know what I'm saying Like those shows felt special They felt like we're doing some fun shit Man that shit is like energy man That energy, that energy, like, it's like, it was like some shit I would want to see.

[1602] Like, if I was a guy who liked stand -up who didn't do it, I want to see that show.

[1603] And it's the show, and then it's seeing other people enjoy the show.

[1604] You know what I'm saying?

[1605] Blumming it to somebody.

[1606] Hey, we were at the Rogan Chappelle show, you know?

[1607] No, it was fun, man. That's dope.

[1608] It was real fun.

[1609] Go to do more of those, huh?

[1610] I'm starting my pot.

[1611] You got me started, bro.

[1612] Come on.

[1613] Yo, you promise, son.

[1614] You said you was going to produce.

[1615] I promise.

[1616] I don't back out of promises I'm going to take care of it I know that's why We had to take care of it We should open up a branch That would annoy the fuck out of people Right We'll hire a whole separate group of people So we could help people get podcast launched People are like There's two fucking million years Man You said you're gonna do mine I'm gonna do yours The first one that's all This is I'm gonna concentrate 100 % on you But I'm saying I mean if we did decide to do that To have a branch We're just helped people Get started with their shit but then too many people would ask then you would have like people no you gotta pick it you gotta pick it but then people get mad at you you don't pick that but don't nobody give a fuck you dealing with some like record producer type shit you found a horse in your bed right like a yearly draft you just want to be five a year oh yearly draft that yeah too much work see much work we just produce yours we just produce that's it man just mine yeah yeah what was I thinking I was giving myself a job producing yours is your fans started fucking but trying to bully me your shit Yeah, I was in Orlando and all these motherfuckers Looked like you kept coming up to me They love you.

[1617] They look like just like you, man They look like you, they walk like you, they're just like you They are you, sir And they come up and talk about what the fuck is up with the podcast That's the truth That's hilarious Well, we got you.

[1618] We're rolling.

[1619] We're official, you heard of here folks, ladies and gentlemen.

[1620] That's it.

[1621] We're rolling, yeah, 100%.

[1622] You got me, I'm gonna do it.

[1623] Yeah, it can't, well, it has to be I know it's hard to get going with those things it's hard to figure out five months five months of me being nervous five months of ducking you we had a couple conversations failed yo five months i tried it one time i feel like i tried to do everybody podcast at one time i had fucking green screen i had all type of shit going on right and i just fucking was talking and i just couldn't get it and i said man fucking i don't want to do it and i tried to quit my own shit well don't quit this i'm not going to quit we'll help you 100 % that all right We're in.

[1624] It's moving.

[1625] The train is on the tracks.

[1626] Chee -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch.

[1627] Dude, I've been reading this book about the Wild West.

[1628] Holy shit.

[1629] It's an audio book.

[1630] I say I'm reading, but I'm really lying.

[1631] I'm listening to someone read.

[1632] That's fucked up.

[1633] At least you fessed up.

[1634] Oh, I always do.

[1635] Empire of the Summer Moon.

[1636] Holy shit.

[1637] Holy shit is it good.

[1638] It's terrifying.

[1639] empire of the what empire of the summer moon it's about the wars between the settlers and uh native americans i'm in like it's track four whatever that means i guess that's chapter four and holy fuck is it horrific some of the things that happened to these people man i don't like you like gory no it's not that it's the history of the united states i'm fascinated by like what happened with these tribes and when these white settlers showed up and I'm fascinated by what the tribes were doing before the settlers showed up too and they detail a lot of that too it talks about the Comanchee about what happened when the Comanchee got horses and they just really started getting really good at raising horses and they had way more horses than anybody and so they dominated it's fascinating stuff man I mean this wasn't that long ago that these folks were riding horses Dlaminating landscape with bows and arrows and spears and hunting buffalo and cooking them over fire.

[1640] I mean, it's fucking amazing.

[1641] Their life was, it is like, like sort of fairy tale movie type shit of like Avatar people.

[1642] Like this is how these, a lot of these folks lived.

[1643] I mean, and it's savage too.

[1644] Like the murders, when it talks about the murders and murdering, murdering settlers and babies and all kinds of crazy shit.

[1645] Like, if you can't handle that, don't read it.

[1646] But you're not reading it.

[1647] listening to it son you're right you listen to i'll listen to it yeah is that better than reading it it's just i can do it in my car i'm always driving around i mean i try to read but i don't read as much as i do listen i listen way more than i read you got to go on the beach or something where you can hear like like a book is like yeah like flipping a page i might have to check that out i will check that how bold is it to buy a house on the beach in 2019 how bold is it to say you know what i think everything is going to stay exactly the way it is he's fucking scientists don't know jack shit like if you buy a house in santa monica or something where you're on those stilts over the water it's going to go soon what are the odds how long what did they have odds on what parts of the shoreline get a rate eroded completely over the next 10 years what the odds i'm pretty sure somebody knows that though or somebody's predicting or planning for it be my people are still buying those fucking houses imagine trying to unload them when the water starts rising.

[1648] He's like, oh, we're at 12 degrees.

[1649] Hey, listen.

[1650] What are they going to do?

[1651] I mean, are they really going to lose all those houses?

[1652] Or do they get to push back?

[1653] Maybe they get to push back.

[1654] Maybe they push the highway back a little bit.

[1655] Push the houses back a little bit.

[1656] Pick them up.

[1657] Back them up before the ocean comes.

[1658] No, they're going to take that L and rebuild, man. Take the L. This is a real cockroach.

[1659] No, that's a tarantula.

[1660] Yeah, tarantula wasp, hawk.

[1661] Tarrantial hawk.

[1662] Tarrantial.

[1663] hawk is it in his grass to eat or something no my friend was on the podcast talking me about it and he has a farm and uh he was telling me about these fucking things they land on tarantulas and fuck them up and lay their eggs in a tarantula it's dark shit and they look they're enormous looking and he was describing how big it was and I was like what and so then I get a package and it's one of these motherfuckers show them a picture of it can we put a picture of it and then they just come on a video of one fight okay but that is what it's that is an actual real dead one and he has them around his vineyards do you know the band tool oh so he likes them there well he likes them there to kill a tarantulas I think they're all apart I don't think they want to kill tarantulas I think everything's a part it's all a part of the ecosystem there the only thing you want to get rid of is stuff that fucks up your crops the size of these things I mean they're goddamn a enormous.

[1664] I mean, if I could describe this, how big is this?

[1665] For people that are just listening?

[1666] If it's straightened out, it's a good, solid three inches.

[1667] When you say?

[1668] It's so creepy looking, yeah.

[1669] When you say it's three inches, though?

[1670] It's like half the size of a terrace.

[1671] I don't want to hear any small dick jokes.

[1672] That's easy.

[1673] That's a hacky.

[1674] You know what three inches is, but that's three inches?

[1675] Wra -w -w -w -wra -w -w -wra.

[1676] Two inches, at least.

[1677] Like a small cockroach.

[1678] It's hard to tell because it's curved folks, because it's dehydrated and dead, and it's curled up in a ball.

[1679] But I feel like if you straighten that fucker out, it would be four inches.

[1680] That's a big bitch.

[1681] That's a big bitch.

[1682] That's alarmingly large cockroach.

[1683] So we're looking at some shit from the animal planet.

[1684] What is this that we're looking at, Jamie?

[1685] Is this one laying the eggs in the tarantula?

[1686] Fuck.

[1687] One minute version.

[1688] Also, like, they were living like, you know, in the 1700s, they were living in this way, in the 1800s, they were living in this way that it's incomprehensible for people from Europe.

[1689] Is it a series or anything, or only a book?

[1690] It's just a book.

[1691] Someone, my friend, the jackalope on Instagram, he's a Hunter S. Thompson.

[1692] That sounds like something that would be turned into a series.

[1693] It seems like it should be.

[1694] Someone, if they did like a real accurate account of these settlers trying to travel across the country and what happened to them and what happened to the Native Americans and the war with the soldiers and all the treaties that were broken and all the horrible horrific shit that happened to them.

[1695] But it's just, it's just all that aside, which you can never ignore, all that aside, it's fascinating just to think of how they were living their lives, just riding around on a horse.

[1696] spearing buffalo, eating meat over a fire.

[1697] They didn't grow shit.

[1698] They didn't have baskets.

[1699] They weren't doing pottery.

[1700] They were just eating meat over fire, making bows and arrows and fucking things up and dominating the West.

[1701] But they probably still had the same problems as everybody else.

[1702] They certainly had problems.

[1703] They probably had the same problems as everybody else.

[1704] It's just crazy to listen to the depictions of how they tortured the enemy.

[1705] And it's, whew, it's hardcore.

[1706] But it's just, to me, when you hear what's, you know, a well -researched, accurate account of something that happened in our past, it's, it always makes me think, like, it's hard to even believe that life was any different, even though we know it was in 1 ,600 and 1 ,600.

[1707] We can't even think about that.

[1708] We can't even think about what it would be like to live in that time.

[1709] And these motherfuckers just riding horses.

[1710] I was in San Diego last week.

[1711] And they had some type of exhibit going on.

[1712] And this dude had like some real bow and arrows, like some long -ass, like, man -made.

[1713] Like real Native American ones?

[1714] And I almost stepped on.

[1715] I just looked at it.

[1716] I was like, God damn.

[1717] You know, you think about the man. And if you could build a tool like that, you was the shit in the trial.

[1718] Yeah, back then.

[1719] If you could build a good bow.

[1720] A good bow and practice that shit on something?

[1721] I wonder when the bow was invented.

[1722] When did people first?

[1723] start fucking each other up with bows let's guess you know the mongols had it so that was in the 1200s and that was like this and it was no gauges or anything it's just like something that bent was a bow yeah well sometimes i mean some of them they were really skillfully made and they got really good with their arrows too and they got really good with the the right size and the right kind of wood so they would weigh like a similar amount and there was an art to teaching people how to shoot the bows and the arrows but god they were so crude in comparison to what people have today but back then it was the shit it was the shit the mongols they had a bow supposedly according to um who had who had a um who had a piece on the the bows of the mongols there was like an article that was written about the bows of the mongols what are the boughs of the mongols It's just gigantic fucking bows that they was pulled back that were...

[1724] The Mongols was a tribe?

[1725] The Mongols, yeah.

[1726] Oh, the Mongols.

[1727] Dan Carlin's hardcore history has this amazing series on it called The Rath of the Khan.

[1728] And Dan Carlin said that their bows were like 160 pounds to pull back.

[1729] So some guy wrote an article.

[1730] I cannot remember what it was in, but it was all detailing the science behind the bows.

[1731] But you couldn't lock it or anything.

[1732] You had to...

[1733] You had to just...

[1734] And to hold it, right?

[1735] And hold it.

[1736] and then shoot these arrows.

[1737] That's insane.

[1738] You stretch it out.

[1739] You can't aim until you have it stretched, right?

[1740] Right.

[1741] Yeah, I'm not good at the...

[1742] I don't know how to shoot one, honestly.

[1743] I mean, I kind of know the principles behind it.

[1744] I've maybe shot one ten times ever.

[1745] One I use has a release.

[1746] You clip the release to the string.

[1747] Yeah, it's a different kind of thing.

[1748] What they're doing...

[1749] See, that's what I'm talking about.

[1750] That's called a recurve bow.

[1751] And that guy, I mean, I don't know what he's pulling back, but I can bet these guys are strong as fuck.

[1752] Man, can you just imagine looking back at a dude has his bow already back there?

[1753] And some of them had deformities in their skeletons that they believe were probably caused by the injuries that they got from pulling back these heavy -ass bows.

[1754] Like they developed these, you know, calcified joints and all sorts of weird bone deformities just from pulling back these gigantic fucking bows.

[1755] It's so hard.

[1756] you pull something like that back.

[1757] Man. Like a lot of people can't pull back like a 70 pound ball.

[1758] But you're not just talking pulling back.

[1759] You're talking about pulling back.

[1760] And holding it.

[1761] And aim and trying to hit something.

[1762] Not just like, phew.

[1763] Yep.

[1764] We're talking about...

[1765] A hundred times a day, 200 times a day.

[1766] And keep going out there to find your fucking bowl.

[1767] Your arrows and shit.

[1768] Like...

[1769] Dude.

[1770] Missing like shit.

[1771] Dude, they had to be so fucking strong.

[1772] But they got it done.

[1773] I would have...

[1774] Like, if I could have a time machine, man, and just drop down and watch the Comanchee like run down a herd of Buffalo and see them like if I could just be a fly on the wall and watch what it was like to be like a Comanchee in the 1800s that would be fucking fascinating to see man that would be an interesting eye just people living in this really wild nomadic hunter life they barely even gathered they barely even like ate nuts and berries and shit apparently They had to be hunting, hunting all the time.

[1775] Yeah, and they were using all kinds of fucked up methods, man. They would light the fields on fire and chase them into rivers and shit.

[1776] What, the buffaloes?

[1777] Yeah.

[1778] It's wild shit, man. And this is life or death for them, right?

[1779] If they don't get a buffalo, they don't eat.

[1780] Fuck, it is so, it's, there's something about it that's so, it's so fascinating.

[1781] You got to come home with a motherfucking buffalo.

[1782] You have to, and nobody eats.

[1783] I wonder where they're like Man we're sick of these fucking potatoes Motherfuckers I don't think they had many potatoes There was a lot of buffalo What vegetables do you think they had There was a guy named Dan Flores That wrote a piece about what was happening Once Native American tribes Started riding on horses And running down buffalo And they were like the numbers were getting decimated They were like even if the market hunters Didn't come along and kill all the buffalo Which you know they did they said it just would have taken longer but these Native Americans on horses were so effective they were eventually going to wipe them all out crazy I would love to have seen what that was like just to see those people existing like you would like to live that life no no I like air conditioning I like food but it seemed like you would go like you would go if it was a weekend of that shit oh well I've done it on weekends really yeah I mean sort of like I've gone camping hunting It's sort of.

[1784] I mean, it's way easier to do than it is to do it with, you know, ancient bows and arrows and shows.

[1785] That's hard to do.

[1786] But there's probably arguably way more animals around back then, too.

[1787] Yeah, the motherfuckily animals got shot up, son.

[1788] Those guys lived their entire life with no knowledge of the Western world.

[1789] There was many generations where they didn't have any contact.

[1790] And then all of a sudden, you know, the Spanish come here and the French came here.

[1791] All of a sudden, it's like 1 ,400s, the 1 ,500s.

[1792] I think they didn't even get horses until the Europeans brought them over.

[1793] And then they got, once they got horses, they just start kicking everybody's ass, especially the Comanchee apparently.

[1794] It's amazing, man, this book is, it's got me, I've all, I'm thinking about it all day.

[1795] Did they take horses?

[1796] Yeah, they stole horses from people.

[1797] There's stories in them about them stealing horses from soldiers, didn't know what the fuck they're doing.

[1798] Comanches came and stole.

[1799] their horses yeah they they would steal all their horses and leave them to die because you're in the middle of this fucking area with no food no water no rain good luck they were just leaving to die and they knew what they were doing by taking their horses and that was fun for them they're like fuck you yeah instead of just killing them i mean they could have killed them easy they decided you know what we're not even gonna kill you we'll let you slowly run out of food and water you're about 300 miles away from anything to eat see yeah good luck and you and damn that's how they planned revenge and everything hardcore dude that is hardcore they'll just starve like they just that's fucked up it's just reading these depictions of what the combat was like and you know the raids they did on these settlers uh villages and shit like these people tried to they sold people land in like Cherokee or uh Comanche infested territory they sold they gave these people this giant swats of lands and here build a house this would be perfect for you and they're like oh okay And so they moved in, not knowing.

[1800] And then Comanches came and killed everybody and took people slaves and, oh my God.

[1801] Who was the real estate agent on that deal?

[1802] Dude, the United States government, Uncle Sam's got your best interest.

[1803] I don't know who it was that told them to do that.

[1804] I think it was a homestead act.

[1805] It was one of those things we were trying to get people to settle the West.

[1806] And the way they were doing it was they were offering anybody who would go out there.

[1807] You would get a certain amount of land for free if you just go out there and you had to farm it for a little.

[1808] They just fucked everybody up.

[1809] And that's what this story is about at this point.

[1810] It's fucking terrifying.

[1811] I want to watch that series, man. I know, right?

[1812] And Netflix needs to get on it.

[1813] Somebody's going to get on it.

[1814] It just felt too, like, really cowboy.

[1815] I don't know.

[1816] That series seems like I could watch that shit.

[1817] It's a wild romantic connection that we always have to the way Native Americans live, but I've never really seen it depicted in this way as this book.

[1818] It's very fascinating.

[1819] just amazing to hear like what life was like hundreds of years ago right here.

[1820] Damn.

[1821] I mean, the change out of nowhere.

[1822] Imagine if you looked at the year 1 ,400 and then go back through time.

[1823] You could go hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years.

[1824] Not much changes.

[1825] It all kind of looks the same.

[1826] Then all of a sudden, 1 ,500, 1 ,600, 1 ,600 buildings, 19, 2 ,000.

[1827] 2000, 2019, planes, pollution, infrared, 5G, Occupy Mars.

[1828] I got a Mars t -shirt on.

[1829] It all happened so quick.

[1830] It did.

[1831] It was fucking cruise ships.

[1832] What was looking at the side of that boat?

[1833] What the fuck is that?

[1834] Giant boat that can't stop or slow down.

[1835] They bang into harbors.

[1836] You're just waving at people and just docking that shit.

[1837] In Cleveland, they got a line of those boats.

[1838] They just wait on the side.

[1839] When I was in Venice, the boats let out.

[1840] You got some peanuts or something, son?

[1841] Yeah, you're hungry?

[1842] Are you hungry?

[1843] No, I can use some penis.

[1844] We don't have any peanuts, but that's a fat bomb.

[1845] That's an F bomb.

[1846] I don't want this shit, son.

[1847] It's good for you.

[1848] I don't want no, I know, man. Nobody wants those.

[1849] I eat, don't say nobody.

[1850] What do you mean you eat this?

[1851] What is it?

[1852] What is it?

[1853] It's mostly nuts and fats, healthy fats.

[1854] But a liquid?

[1855] No, it's like a gooey paste.

[1856] You chew it.

[1857] Can't do it.

[1858] Man, I don't want no bad thing.

[1859] Guie paste, man. Fuck out of here.

[1860] Yes, sir.

[1861] Nah, that's all you, sir.

[1862] That's all you, sir.

[1863] I love these.

[1864] I eat the shit of these.

[1865] They're called F -bombs.

[1866] No, man. Yeah, this is salted chocolate macadamia.

[1867] One of my favorite.

[1868] But what is it supposed to do?

[1869] Gives me healthy energy.

[1870] Okay.

[1871] Like, say if I just need like a little bit of a snack, like if I'm going to go work out or something like that, but I want to eat a full meal, I'll have one of these.

[1872] Or in between meals.

[1873] I'm like a little bit hungry.

[1874] Oh, you just squeeze that shit.

[1875] It's nutrition.

[1876] Yeah, that's nutrition and nuts.

[1877] the bag.

[1878] That's a free ad for F -Bomb.

[1879] I love that shit.

[1880] I can't say that without sounding gay, but I love nut butter.

[1881] How different from, like, peanut butter?

[1882] Oh, my God.

[1883] I thought you were going to say how different from giz.

[1884] Peanut butter.

[1885] I mean, it's almond butter is a little different to peanut butter.

[1886] I don't know what.

[1887] That's a good question.

[1888] They should get a new name.

[1889] I don't know who.

[1890] Nut butter.

[1891] Nut butter.

[1892] I didn't think they ever expected it.

[1893] What do you think is more, this is more?

[1894] good question because I never really what's more nutritious peanut butter or almond butter do we know let's find out let's Google what's more nutrition which company makes it because there's going to be added that's true that's true just maybe there's like a pure definition though maybe by definition or just by fact almonds have X amount percentage of this or that that peanut butter doesn't or vice averse I don't know almond for the win but most people aren't allergic to almonds not that most people are allergic to peanuts but I've heard of more people being allergic to peanuts than almonds, right?

[1895] Because you always hear it on an airplane.

[1896] They have similar nutritional value.

[1897] almond butter is slightly healthier than peanut butter because it has more vitamins, minerals, and fiber.

[1898] Both nut butters are roughly equal in calories and sugar, but peanut butter has a little more protein than almond butter.

[1899] So, pretty similar in the neighborhood.

[1900] Not a giant leap.

[1901] But people get, Callan's mom's got an allergy to Brazil nuts, which is kind of crazy.

[1902] How do you find out what nut you're really allergic to us?

[1903] question with some people they barely survive it some people are so they're so allergic to peanuts that if they get on a plane they will ask other people on the plane to not eat peanuts they'll say that but you know what I mean I don't know about that I'm pretty sure out of all the times you've heard that announcement right right somebody has had some peanuts on that plane some fat dude just doesn't do a fuck about the world I don't think if you have a flight you know planners bitch he just eats it like this so no peanut dust gets in the air yeah but he's got peanut breath for the whole fucking flight he's he's secretly open he hears her coughing that's a weird allergy man nuts peanuts peanuts peanuts it's a weird one it'll shut the whole it's terrible well it's also a deadly one it's not like allergy to milk allergy to milk makes you fart you feel terrible you get lactose intolerance you know allergy to peanuts a serious one that's a death It's like...

[1904] I could kill you.

[1905] Your face deforming and everything, right?

[1906] Yeah.

[1907] Is that what happens?

[1908] I mean, the people that...

[1909] Well, that's...

[1910] I've seen that allergy reaction to, like, seafood, but I can imagine it's probably the same type.

[1911] Wow.

[1912] There's so much shit that can kill you.

[1913] If you really wanted to sit down and freak out, you could.

[1914] Easily.

[1915] Easily.

[1916] You know?

[1917] That's what's hard in life.

[1918] It's hard to keep your eye on positivity.

[1919] Just move forward and a purely positive.

[1920] It's so easy.

[1921] easy to think about all the shit that could go wrong all the stuff that can kill you and all the poisons and drugs.

[1922] All the distraction and it's like you say it's easy to think of that but you want to know that stuff's out there right you don't want to be ignorant you have to have some knowledge you have to have I think you should have a minimum amount of knowledge and almost in a lot of shit do you hear about this shit that's going down in Mexico what's happening where those Mormons got shot out they got shot up by the cartel then they tried the first report they tried to say they made a mistake.

[1923] They made a mistake?

[1924] Yeah, they was like, oh, they don't think that they think that it was a hit went wrong.

[1925] That was original reporting.

[1926] But now it's just a hit.

[1927] So now they think it's just a hit.

[1928] It's not a mistake.

[1929] Yeah, 100%.

[1930] And some of the Mormons, a lot of them was like, fuck that.

[1931] We're out of here.

[1932] They should.

[1933] They should get out of that.

[1934] Some are staying.

[1935] Plagued by deadly attacks, members of this Mormon community are fleeing Mexico.

[1936] I thought that was Theo Vaugh.

[1937] I was like, what the fuck?

[1938] Is that why he did it, Jamie?

[1939] Yo, yo, yo.

[1940] I was like, God.

[1941] God damn, man. Yo, I was like, Theo Vaughn, what the fuck?

[1942] You was a Mormon, bro?

[1943] Oh, it's the video before it.

[1944] There he is.

[1945] That's Theo Vaughn's future right there, buddy.

[1946] That's him.

[1947] That's Theo taking a break backstage on his stadium tour.

[1948] That is fucking Theo.

[1949] By this time, Theo is doing stadiums.

[1950] And he's like, hey.

[1951] Will say That's fucking funny He's a funny dude That Theo Vaughan He's a very funny dude He's a unique guy Like his funny is very unique Oh yeah He makes Like if you see it written down on paper You wouldn't know Why is that funny And then you see him stay on stage You're dying It's because it's coming out of him He's out of him He's got an act like Nobody could rip his act off Good luck Good luck Nope How are you gonna do with that You gotta be that You gotta He's one You can watch him And you're like Yeah man He's one of one He's one of one I don't know A number Hamster bones He's like that other guy Oh yeah No there's no Nobody says you're like Theo You're right He's a Theo He's a Theo von That's like saying Like Brody Stevens And I've never heard anybody say He's like Brody Stevens shout out to everybody who can't read and write y 'all could have worked harder in school but whatever hope y 'all are doing well amen see he's all about the Lord man he's all about the Lord man y 'all could have worked harder in school but whatever and you hear it coming out of his mouth I remember he told me the story of why he didn't like black guys coming up because one of them jumped him on the school bus he was like he's named he was like it was Tyrone Jenkins right he knew the name And all I can do is respect the story, man. Oh, my God.

[1952] Yeah, he's been fucking that forever.

[1953] He's a hilarious guy.

[1954] He's such a fun time for stand -up, man. There's so many killers out there right now.

[1955] You know, like any night, if I go to the improv or I go to the store, any night, it's just murderers row.

[1956] I saw Damon work in his new hour.

[1957] Oh, yeah?

[1958] He's doing his new hour in the lab.

[1959] It's already good.

[1960] The comedy scene now is just, it's on fire now.

[1961] And he's, Damon was, he took time off, you know, so he decided to come back, just do these shows.

[1962] Have you seen him work it out?

[1963] Yeah, he was funny, man. Yeah, he knows I'll do a special.

[1964] Always, he's ready.

[1965] By the time he goes on stage, he's ready.

[1966] But he has a different approach.

[1967] He films every show, every single show he does.

[1968] He brings a tripod in his camera and he films it, and then he watches it and analyzes it.

[1969] Oh, he'll get it down.

[1970] People will be interested to see him, too.

[1971] You remember the one special he did, the last stand?

[1972] He called it his last stand.

[1973] When he dropped the mic?

[1974] Yep.

[1975] Yeah.

[1976] He was doing movies with Bruce Willis.

[1977] Remember, he did that?

[1978] He was on fire.

[1979] He was on fire.

[1980] He was on fire.

[1981] He's always been on fire.

[1982] Yeah.

[1983] Yeah, he was on fire.

[1984] He dropped the mic like, Yes.

[1985] Yo, that's so funny.

[1986] So does this start off with him picking the mic back up?

[1987] I've got money saying that I'm sure it's like this.

[1988] That would be hilarious.

[1989] Yeah.

[1990] It would be hilarious if he started this next special that way.

[1991] Pick the mic up.

[1992] I don't know if he's like getting ready to do a special.

[1993] I think he's just putting together material.

[1994] Right.

[1995] It was fun listening to him, though.

[1996] We were all in the green room of the improv, and, you know, we're talking about just stand -up in general.

[1997] Like, his approach, and, you know, he's a guy who works, you know.

[1998] Always.

[1999] A lot of respect for the way he puts together a shit.

[2000] He's not just going up there winging it and not, you know, he's covering all the bases.

[2001] He brings a fucking camera.

[2002] He made me feel lazy.

[2003] He's got a goddamn camera in a tripod that he's carrying around personally.

[2004] He's setting it up.

[2005] He goes home and edits the videos.

[2006] He puts them all on his computer.

[2007] And I'm sitting here going, oh.

[2008] Okay, I'm like, fuck, I'm lazy.

[2009] Like, I need to get a goddamn tripod.

[2010] Nah, son.

[2011] Everybody got different systems, man. That's true, but when someone takes the watching and analyzing that deep, I got to go, hmm.

[2012] He might be on something.

[2013] Or that's his thing.

[2014] Because don't you think that if you do a set and then you watch the set, it's almost like you did two sets?

[2015] No, sometimes I watch, I watch shit sometimes.

[2016] I watch shit with no sound.

[2017] just to see what you look like?

[2018] Yep.

[2019] How do you look?

[2020] I look like I move around a lot.

[2021] I look like I'm telling a story.

[2022] You know what I'm saying?

[2023] I look like I'm telling the story.

[2024] Right.

[2025] You know?

[2026] I look like I'm fucking telling the story.

[2027] But if you were going over new shit, right?

[2028] Like say if you release a special and then you want to write a whole new hour, you would want as much feedback as you could get, like, personally.

[2029] Like as you're formulating the bit, you know how bits are just in the beginning.

[2030] You don't know where the fuck you're going.

[2031] It's a little clunky.

[2032] it'll be good if you could see it too yeah but you know you feel it more than anything you know yeah for sure you know I'm saying like you know like I think you have so many thoughts you might want to you know write something down just so you can have all your thoughts in one space but you feel it yeah you definitely do you feel it like shit you start talking about doing it more special you write chunks of material you know and then you know it's one once you feel good about something you know yeah I was just thinking thinking his method is one step further than mine, which is just listening.

[2033] Like, I think he's probably, that's probably the way to do it.

[2034] If you're going to record your sets, you really should record, record.

[2035] Like, you really should have a fucking video of it, you know, and watch it.

[2036] It's like that level of discipline.

[2037] That's like next level discipline.

[2038] But then the way he writes is interesting.

[2039] He was like, I never really write things down in terms of like write the whole bid out.

[2040] He goes, I have ideas.

[2041] Exactly.

[2042] I got to, I have to say it.

[2043] And when he's saying, he finds the funny.

[2044] I was watching him do this bit.

[2045] It was really interesting because we were talking about it.

[2046] Then I watched him go downstairs and do it.

[2047] And, you know, in the 90s, when I was just getting to the store, he was like a hero in the comedy world.

[2048] Hell yeah.

[2049] To be able to work with Damon Wayans at the comedy store when I was in my 20s, I was like, this is crazy.

[2050] That's Damon Wayans from the fucking Wayne's brothers.

[2051] Exactly.

[2052] The other candidate for the greatest sketch show of all time.

[2053] Those are my top two.

[2054] Oh, my God.

[2055] That's the other candidates.

[2056] I'm sitting there working with him at the fucking goddamn comedy store.

[2057] It was weird.

[2058] Man, that's the weirdest thing, man. When you're a young guy or a young girl, you know, you just get into comedy and you start to break through hanging out with comics that you used to watch on television.

[2059] You're like, oh, shit.

[2060] And then you realize it's just like, what the fuck just happened?

[2061] You're like, what the fuck?

[2062] It's weird.

[2063] But you get used to it.

[2064] You go, oh, they're just people.

[2065] But then you're hanging out with them for it.

[2066] reason though because everybody don't hang out with them yes that's true like you're you're you're there's a reason why you're hanging out with them and not everybody else yeah you know yeah at a certain point I mean there's only so many people that are going to get past the store see you at Marlin damn man so you was out here when they were really like the comedy scene was on fire it was interesting it was really interesting it was really black back then didn't wasn't oh yeah the comedy store was for sure like the all the killers You know, there was Fat Tuesday.

[2067] That was the biggest room, like the biggest promoter room, those guy Tories.

[2068] And, of course, Joe Tori, who did Deaf Comedy Jam, so everybody knew the Tori brothers.

[2069] So that was a, that was, it wasn't, didn't Tupac pull a gun out at one of those or somebody with him?

[2070] Wasn't there some crazy story from the comedy store about like Tupac almost getting in a gunfight in the fucking main room?

[2071] That could have been any store.

[2072] That could have been any store.

[2073] In the 90s, that could have been any store.

[2074] the comedy store was wild back then yeah there was there was moments where it was wild there it is guy tory recalls curving tupac at the height of east -west tension curving what does that mean uh stop and diffusing oh okay yeah i think there was a some sort of firearm in the premises yeah but anyway it's like then but then other than those guys though here's the thing that was crazy it was like there was a lot of guys that were there that were laid over from like the 80s that you like you you you you you don't hear from anymore it was really funny people too they just for whatever reason they just never never quite caught on for them and back then they missed what we have now because if you didn't get a television show and you didn't get on a movie you're fucked yeah it wasn't nothing to do it was nothing else to do it was so few guys all the road just got famous from doing stand -down yeah exactly everybody did something else and then and that's oh yeah but you you wouldn't get fame in new york but you could make a living in New York.

[2075] You can make a living in Boston too.

[2076] Same thing.

[2077] You can make a living.

[2078] You can make a living.

[2079] It ain't going to be no extreme living, but you can make a living.

[2080] You had to have some kind of TV show or something where people would come to see you.

[2081] You know, Martin had everything, obviously.

[2082] We just talked about it.

[2083] Yeah.

[2084] But most people relied on something else, and some of them had just passed them by.

[2085] And then they were in their 40s and 50s, and they had never really hit with anything.

[2086] And you'd see them hanging around, but it was just like, fuck, it didn't work out.

[2087] And then this new crop came in after that.

[2088] The new crop came in like the 2000s.

[2089] The early 2000s, you start seeing these new guys coming in.

[2090] And you start seeing, like, that's when Ari Shafir was already killing at the club by then.

[2091] He was already doing like smaller spots by then.

[2092] You know, he was, I think he was probably even, I wonder when did he become a paid regular?

[2093] Yeah.

[2094] But it was, you know, it was on the comeback.

[2095] It goes, it went back and forth until now.

[2096] And now, over the last like four and a half, five years, the comedy store is on fire.

[2097] Now it's not like anything else I've ever seen.

[2098] It's Phil, I can't even explain the energy on Tuesdays.

[2099] Yeah.

[2100] The whole fucking week is dope, but it's something about Tuesdays.

[2101] Tuesday's because everybody's off the road.

[2102] Tuesday just like, I think the comedy store own Tuesday nights right now.

[2103] Yeah, it's a hot night.

[2104] And then the energy, the patio energy, it's a good spot.

[2105] It's a great spot.

[2106] And then there's roast battle afterwards.

[2107] And then Tuesdays, a lot of times, Jeremiah does that stand -up on the spot show, too.

[2108] He does that a lot on Tuesdays.

[2109] On which room?

[2110] And which room?

[2111] He does it in the belly room.

[2112] He's doing it this Tuesday, but I'm at the improv.

[2113] I'm out of here.

[2114] Where am I Tuesday?

[2115] He, uh, have you done that show?

[2116] Which one?

[2117] On the spot show?

[2118] No. You just get blasted.

[2119] You just get as high as you can.

[2120] Just have like two or three drinks.

[2121] And then people yell out subjects.

[2122] You have no idea.

[2123] Oh, you get this.

[2124] Yeah.

[2125] You have no idea.

[2126] Oh, that's all that's fun.

[2127] Oh, my God, every now and then you come up with a bit.

[2128] Every now and then.

[2129] That would be a real test.

[2130] Yeah, it's fun.

[2131] That's the real test.

[2132] You would excel at that.

[2133] You need to do that.

[2134] Yeah, I'll do that shit.

[2135] He needs to do it like one Tuesday a month.

[2136] I told him, why don't you do it every week?

[2137] What the fuck?

[2138] It's in a belly room, right?

[2139] Just do it every week, man. I don't think he wants to.

[2140] He needs to farm it out to have a B promoter.

[2141] To just have it every week.

[2142] If he doesn't want to do it every week, I get it.

[2143] I get not wanting to schedule it every week.

[2144] But that is a good place to, for the bird.

[2145] a joke oh my god it's amazing and the audience knows you have no fucking idea what you're talking about scariest feeling ever they're like this wait a minute this motherfucker just made this up and they know you're blasted oh so they get lit oh yeah i do i don't do that show i don't do that show sober i have it's i'll smoke an ell i don't think i do no alcohol well i fucking yeah you never know yeah that sounds like a little bit next thing you say it's like yeah little bit tino's a tonic Yeah, just a little bit To get the old blood pumping Get the old don't give a fuck engine cranking Get it, go on What's up, Jamie?

[2146] There is a Tupac shootout story Oh my God Oh, oh, so Joey Diaz had it on his podcast Yeah, he told it on his podcast Oh, okay He probably told me about it too Yeah, man Wow Tupac came in, he's your friend And got into a shootout, no, wow Eddie Griffin got band Got banned because Tupac got into a shootout?

[2147] There's still bullets on the mandarin across the street.

[2148] Oh, my God.

[2149] It's spelled out to the street.

[2150] Damn, son, that's too much to go.

[2151] Yo, they fucking got bullets.

[2152] Now I'm responsible for Tupac getting into a shootout.

[2153] How crazy were the 90s?

[2154] Jesus.

[2155] Him and Tretch from Nottie by nature beat somebody up in the main room also.

[2156] Oh, God.

[2157] Damn.

[2158] It's Guy Tore's night.

[2159] Jesus Christ.

[2160] You know, that night was off the hook.

[2161] Who.

[2162] I remember that night.

[2163] Fat Tuesdays.

[2164] Do you do Laugh Factory much?

[2165] Yeah.

[2166] How do you like it over there?

[2167] It's cool.

[2168] Yeah?

[2169] Yep, I have a good time.

[2170] I do chocolate Sundays.

[2171] I do a lot of Jay Davis shows.

[2172] It's a great room, the way it's designed.

[2173] It really is.

[2174] It's a great room.

[2175] You know, the Ice House is a new owner now.

[2176] I heard about that.

[2177] New people bought the Ice House.

[2178] I haven't been on a new.

[2179] I think they're going to just keep it basically the same.

[2180] Pretty much.

[2181] And Bob is like he's consulting for like a year.

[2182] They run smoothly.

[2183] Yeah.

[2184] That could work.

[2185] I mean, the ice house has history.

[2186] That's a good room to work, too.

[2187] Oldest room in the country.

[2188] Is it?

[2189] Yep.

[2190] It started stand -up comedy?

[2191] It started with, like, variety acts.

[2192] And then it went to full -time, it was originally an ice house, like, back before they had refrigerators, and people would buy ice.

[2193] Oh, yeah?

[2194] That's why they call it the ice house.

[2195] And then it became, like, a variety show place where, like, they'd have bands, and then they had a few comedians, and then they just went to straight stand -up.

[2196] But I think they went to straight stand -up in the 70s.

[2197] Is that what it is?

[2198] 78.

[2199] And so I think, I don't know, does that make them the oldest comedy club?

[2200] It seems like the comedy store was around back then.

[2201] I think that was full -time comedy.

[2202] That is what this says.

[2203] The comedy store wasn't full -time in the 70?

[2204] What year to the store?

[2205] Was that 76?

[2206] Find out what year the store was opened.

[2207] You ever did the La Jolla store?

[2208] I love that place.

[2209] I love that, I was there last week.

[2210] Ooh, that room's amazing.

[2211] That room is so cool.

[2212] I like those people.

[2213] I like San Diego people.

[2214] Yeah, they're real chill.

[2215] Something about San Diego people.

[2216] They're like, they're like less L .A., but more California.

[2217] They are.

[2218] They're like chill people.

[2219] They are.

[2220] They like nice Californians.

[2221] Like you said, they're nice Californians.

[2222] But they're not Hollywood.

[2223] They're like all the California, but none of the Hollywood.

[2224] Like regular folks that live in a nice city in California with the great weather, but they're not Hollywood.

[2225] Exactly.

[2226] You nailed it.

[2227] I went down there and they had some.

[2228] festival going on downtown they're beautiful this restaurant it was nice they're beautiful i love them i love santa barber too you ever go up santa barbara i spend a lot of time in santa barbara bro santa barbara's beautiful it's beautiful it's the same thing not too many people yeah it's like it's nice it's pretty and he's like the comfortable the most ericknomically designed chairs yeah this is the comedy store opened in 72 april 72 but the uh ice house was running from 1960 to 78 as like a variety show comedians were going the entire time so that's why it's distincted as ongoing longest ongoing comedy club because it's been going on there so it's had comedy forever but it had other stuff as well whereas the comedy store was only comedy and that was 72 right okay huh and I'm telling what did they what did it take to get a weekend at the fucking ice house that was probably crazy right Oh, man. Well, there probably wasn't that many clubs back then, right?

[2229] How'd you get work?

[2230] You get a weekend at the ice house.

[2231] Shit, there's only one club.

[2232] It's not that many fucking, I know they had a shitload of comedians.

[2233] There used to be a place that my friend Adam Ferrari used to work at that was in, it was in like, fuck, like Westwood or Brentwood or something like that.

[2234] That was a real clean place.

[2235] You had to be clean to work there.

[2236] Do you know what I'm talking about?

[2237] I know the club.

[2238] I think they said it's a spot that Lino hits on like...

[2239] Oh, you're thinking of the Comedy Magic Club in Hermosa.

[2240] Yeah, that's what I'm thinking.

[2241] I wasn't thinking about that.

[2242] No, it was thinking it was a place that Richard Jenny used to work out at all the time.

[2243] God damn it.

[2244] I wish I could remember.

[2245] But I remember Ferraro was working there and him and I were buddies and I was in the back of the room going, God, I wish I could work here.

[2246] But I'm dirty.

[2247] Oh, yeah.

[2248] Too naughty.

[2249] But those, I found them rooms would be challenging too on occasion.

[2250] Super clean rooms.

[2251] Yeah, just to say I could do it.

[2252] It's weird.

[2253] They're weird.

[2254] It seems like they're waiting.

[2255] I love that place.

[2256] And when I go there, it seems like it's my crowd.

[2257] But I've heard people say that, you know, they're told they can't talk about certain things.

[2258] They can't, you know, they have a real nice clientele.

[2259] They've had them forever.

[2260] They have, like, a certain vibe.

[2261] And I don't begrudge the guy.

[2262] That's his thing.

[2263] You know, and he's never giving me. If I ever went, I would understand that going in.

[2264] He's the only club that ever told me I couldn't have Joey Diaz open for me, though.

[2265] God damn.

[2266] He shut Joey down?

[2267] He was like, he's too crazy.

[2268] He's like, I love him He goes, I love him, but I just can't He's a great guy But he's such a great guy, Joey didn't care Joey loves him still He's like, I get it, I get it I'm talking about eating mufflers I get it, I get it And Joey just said, Joey just like, Give me the food, I'll take the food That food is fantastic They have one of the best comedy club steaks You ever know really?

[2269] Oh, really?

[2270] Oh my God The food at the Comedy Magic Club It's like a really nice restaurant Like if you ate there as a restaurant you'd be happy so the food's very good yeah you have to wear a suit no do you i hope not there's never maybe the castle the magic castle i think they're oh that's different that's the magic castle the comedy in magic that's that that comedy magic club is at hermosa beach the magic castle's in l. okay it's in hollywood yeah yeah that's that i've never been in that one but that one you have to wear a suit i want to go jimmy schubert is a member of that really yeah yeah i can see shoobert is he's very old school yeah he got his fucking he probably keep a deck of card somewhere that's hilarious just in case you got to pull out a magic trick yeah comedy and magic together is a weird combination when they have those shows at the comedy magic club they'll have a magician do 15 then you do stand up afterwards it's real weird it does it back but it's people enjoy it it's like a cool variety thing down there i could do it i've seen guys the magician guys like they don't get to go up so he's just going around the party's just like right just Like flipping cards and shit They're motherfuckers Will suck all the women Out of a fucking room With trickery?

[2271] Oh my God, yeah Why do women like that kind of trickery?

[2272] They just want to be I don't know They just want to feel like They want to see some sorcery Yeah, some type of sorcery going on Magical They whenever they go It's all You see them like Fairy tales are real And that's when you start Shit start disappearing And shit I've been in fucking David Blaine Fucking took my watch off before Oh, did he really?

[2273] Yeah, he do some crazy shit.

[2274] How did you take your watch off?

[2275] I don't know, man. He just did some David Blaine shit.

[2276] That makes me nervous.

[2277] This motherfucker regurgitated some frogs before.

[2278] It just makes me nervous that a guy would be so slick, he would actually be able to take your watch off.

[2279] I know they exist.

[2280] Yeah.

[2281] People, you just said it, it happened to you.

[2282] I know other people have said it happened to them.

[2283] He's done it.

[2284] It's a team of them.

[2285] It's always, I think it's a team of them.

[2286] I just, I believe it, but I've never.

[2287] ever seen it, but I think there's levels to everything.

[2288] If you get to some elite world champion gold medalist in the Olympics level of watch picking, you know what I mean?

[2289] Some dude just like and it's gone.

[2290] Yeah.

[2291] Like you've seen dudes do shit with their hands when they move cards around and it's fucking confusing.

[2292] Their hands are so goddamn fast.

[2293] Their dexterity when they're moving the decks together and doing that kind of shit.

[2294] I mean there's some dudes have control of their hands that's just off the charts and if they're they're about picking watches.

[2295] They can get you.

[2296] They can get you.

[2297] You just made me look for my watch.

[2298] I'm like, did you just pick my shit?

[2299] Have you ever been pickpocketed?

[2300] I don't think so.

[2301] I don't think so either.

[2302] I've been robbed before, but never been pickpocketed.

[2303] But I think it's like...

[2304] What's this?

[2305] That's when he fucking David Blaine threw up the fucking frog.

[2306] Oh, where was the frog?

[2307] In his stomach.

[2308] Really?

[2309] Was the frog dead?

[2310] No, it was alive.

[2311] He spit out three of them, son.

[2312] What kind of torture is that?

[2313] He swallowed three dead frogs alive.

[2314] He didn't get any protest for that.

[2315] But they stayed in there.

[2316] What's crazy.

[2317] I did it.

[2318] It freaked everybody out in that fucking room.

[2319] Bro, that takes balls to swallow a frog.

[2320] Like, what happens if that thing has bacteria in it or some weird disease and it breaks down in your gut?

[2321] What if you don't throw it up in time?

[2322] What if that motherfucker don't come back out?

[2323] Yeah.

[2324] And he just, until he run out of breath.

[2325] Like, he's just down there until he can't breathe anymore.

[2326] He's taking the guy.

[2327] His watch right there on the right.

[2328] Really?

[2329] Yeah, he's shaking his hands.

[2330] He just did it.

[2331] But how did he do it?

[2332] He's, I mean...

[2333] Let me see that again.

[2334] He does in 10 seconds.

[2335] He's already jiggling it right now.

[2336] You can see him fucking with the strap.

[2337] And it's David Blaine!

[2338] See, he was fucking with the strap.

[2339] Yeah.

[2340] Now it's almost undone.

[2341] Now it's gone.

[2342] Wow.

[2343] I was paying attention to that.

[2344] That is impressive.

[2345] The way he shook it.

[2346] And he got his watch!

[2347] And it seems like he did some sort of a magic trick with the cards, too.

[2348] I'm sure he might...

[2349] That's the part of the...

[2350] That's what they're stunned by, right?

[2351] Yeah, yeah.

[2352] Yeah, it's a misdirection.

[2353] When people have that kind of hand control, stay the fuck away from them.

[2354] That's a dangerous person.

[2355] Yeah, man, way too much.

[2356] What do you have time to practice deception at that level?

[2357] I don't want to get anything from David Blaine.

[2358] That motherfucker just look.

[2359] He just, oh, he gave it back.

[2360] Bro, you heard Whitney Cummings bit about magicians?

[2361] No. She goes, they don't like women liars.

[2362] That's why you never see women magicians.

[2363] I was like, oh, shit.

[2364] That was one of those, when someone says something, you go, oh, shit.

[2365] That's true.

[2366] Find me a fucking woman magician.

[2367] There might be like three of them ever.

[2368] I don't think the...

[2369] The Women's Magicians Association of America is now outraged.

[2370] I'm sure there's some women magicians, but you don't consider...

[2371] But you know what?

[2372] We don't never...

[2373] I don't even know any of them.

[2374] I don't know any of them.

[2375] I know a bunch of male magicians, but maybe I'm a sexist piece of shit.

[2376] Yeah, I don't understand how no woman has broke the magician barrier.

[2377] I think magic as like a Penn and Teller form or David Blaine form.

[2378] I think it's an incredible art form.

[2379] that's very difficult for anybody.

[2380] And if it's not in your culture, right?

[2381] Like, if it's not, there's not like a bunch of women, magician guides and, you know, mentors that could help you figure it out and get, it's probably weird for them.

[2382] Like, who the fuck, why?

[2383] They don't have too many examples.

[2384] Why aren't there a lot of female magicians?

[2385] People like magic shows, right?

[2386] That's 100 % right.

[2387] You ever go see Penn and Teller?

[2388] It's a great show.

[2389] I haven't seen them live.

[2390] It's a fucking great show.

[2391] It's confusing.

[2392] They're too professional.

[2393] They've been doing it for a while.

[2394] Jamie, what do you think?

[2395] Well, I think there's no female magicians.

[2396] How many of them are there?

[2397] Let's guess.

[2398] I just Googled famous female ones, and I have never heard of the top five that came up.

[2399] Let me see what you got.

[2400] Give me a top five.

[2401] I have no idea.

[2402] I don't even know where to start.

[2403] Okay, here we go.

[2404] Faye Presto.

[2405] She's probably going, I ain't never heard of you either, motherfuckerucker.

[2406] Misty Lee.

[2407] Say that name.

[2408] Ninskai?

[2409] Ninkai.

[2410] Ninkai, maybe?

[2411] Ninkai.

[2412] Kristen Johnson.

[2413] Dorothy Dietrich Dietrich Dietrich Okay I don't know who those people are either I have no idea I'm actually the assistants I don't know if there's some problem With crossover From assistant to Like maybe if you have assistant She's like super hot She's like I want to imagine too You're like baby I'm the magician You're the assistant But I can fucking do it I know how You're like but baby And then after a while you know she's hot and you're not and he's just trying to keep her and he's okay okay okay let's try something let's try something she can do it if she's a magician she can make anything maybe if you just taught me with like a little more patience maybe i could do exactly what you're doing but you're afraid you're afraid that i'll be better than you is that what this says that's how she would be i picture her with fiery red hair a tight waist Big ass But I've really never ever That's so crazy I've never seen A female magician When Whitney said that joke I was howling I was like That's one of those ones Where you're like Oh my God How come nobody Ever pointed that out before She caught it She ran with it Oh it's such a good point too That's why we don't like Women and Liars That's like you've never seen A female magician Because everybody has to go Oh yeah Oh Jesus Christ What is it There aren't any female magicians You know everybody It's one of those things you hear it and you go fuck she's right she is right what other job is there where there's like no females there's a this is not the reason why but this is an interesting point so I asked this question article in 2013 and one person said the reason that some kids get into magic is because they got beat up oh they had to find magic and that's what led them to find making friends and like a lot of girls don't have having that that makes sense I'm telling you it's a chick magnet right they can that's a really I could really see that as something for a guy to build this confidence up with.

[2414] This is what we combine.

[2415] There's not a lot of money in being like a fitness chick on Instagram, sticking your ass out.

[2416] The market's kind of flooded, but you can separate yourself from the pack.

[2417] If you're a fitness chick who does magic.

[2418] Magic with big tits and spandex.

[2419] Come on, kids.

[2420] That could work.

[2421] That could work.

[2422] Magic in like the most revealing, ridiculous yoga outfit.

[2423] Oh.

[2424] Yeah.

[2425] That's crazy.

[2426] Barefoot.

[2427] making shit disappear bending over for no reason all the time Cotorcianist Mark McClemore says He's a magician now Releasing Magic Rap album Good for him Yeah I heard this other day I like that guy Good for him I bet he could do it I mean Has it gonna have magic ring What can stop someone From being a magician That's one of those gigs Where like anybody could do it What magician?

[2428] I mean not anybody could do it well Don't get me wrong There's a lot of skill to it But I'm saying Nothing's gonna stop you from practicing you could get a book you could take classes right you could buy a kit right people learn how to do magic nothing can stop you first ever magic rap album interesting what do you think that could mean anything he wants it to mean he's crazy you know he could do maybe it's just to get us to talk about it not us but you know everybody I mean that's what they want something to talk about yeah it's a good marketing move it's a brilliant fellow he nailed we're all like what that's the move you got to trick people these days trick them into anything just confuse them that's almost what he's saying is like what if i can buy my natural i gotta go see my son soon son you got to leave i got to see my son son son i just came in today is one of those days did i drab been on the road i just came in from uh pleasanton this morning and i came with you and i'm going back out tomorrow tonight on the red eye oh it's a quick in and out yep all right well let's wrap the way and then it's like that's the worst thing about the road for me is leaving my son i get it you know i feel the same way not about your son obviously but about my own kids you know what i mean you're like i'm out and then you just like certain times like you just want to be home i just just a quick visit it's a little upsetting but i'll be back next week dude we're going to get this podcast launched it's going to change your life you promise it's launched we got it can i say can i just say where i want to be Yes, please.

[2429] I'm going to be at the MGM, Springfield, the MGM Graham and Springfield.

[2430] I think they have a comedy club there.

[2431] MGM Graham.

[2432] Springfield, Illinois?

[2433] Springfield, no, Springfield, Massachusetts.

[2434] Oh, okay.

[2435] And they just announced today that Martin Lawrence, the lit tour, lit as fuck tour, is coming out, tickets on sale, and I'll be doing some dates coming this year.

[2436] Beautiful.

[2437] And degenerates, son.

[2438] And degenerates on Netflix.

[2439] And the new podcast, which is going to be called Too Soon.

[2440] Donnell Rawlins show Donnell Rawlins show You produced it You already said it Son Perfect It's real ghetto right now But I'll make it better Perfect Keep it real All right Bye everybody Thank you Dude that's perfect Just do it exactly like that I love it