Bob Mervak

[0] Hello, welcome to the armchair expert.

[1] I'm Dak Shepard.

[2] And today we're going to speak with Bob Murvac.

[3] Bob Murvac is my wife, Kristen Bell's best childhood friend, or one of her best childhood friends.

[4] And we came to know each other about 10 years ago through Kristen.

[5] And I discovered quickly that Bob is a musical genius, a phenom.

[6] And he and Kristen used to perform together in high school for hire at funerals, weddings, all kinds of weird stuff.

[7] You could probably get them out to just about any event for about $100.

[8] And I then worked with Bob on the movie Hit and Run, which I made in 2012.

[9] And he's just a genuinely wonderful person.

[10] And I thought he might be of interest to all of you because he is special and gifted.

[11] And we get to hear him sing and play the piano.

[12] And it's really fun.

[13] Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to armchair expert early.

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[17] He's an armchair expert.

[18] He's an upchair expert.

[19] One of those steel that I'm thinking of.

[20] Oh, totally.

[21] Like this old industrial.

[22] But that was, it was a, it was a war microphone.

[23] So you're, you're rolling?

[24] Okay.

[25] Welcome to the armchair expert.

[26] I have a very fun surprise for myself and for you.

[27] My friend Bob Murvac is here from Detroit, Michigan.

[28] He was visiting.

[29] And so I'm forcing him to do this.

[30] He's going to play a song for us right out of the gates.

[31] He's too modest to admit this, but he has a very bad cold.

[32] I might even call it a flu.

[33] And he's going to push through that for our auditory enjoyment.

[34] He's going to play a song that I requested.

[35] And without further ado, Bob, whenever you're ready to sink your dinky.

[36] I'm not too proud.

[37] Okay.

[38] I say I have the flu.

[39] Okay.

[40] Hey, little girl, is your daddy home?

[41] Did he go away and leave you all alone?

[42] Mm, I got a bad desire.

[43] Tell me, little girl, is he good to you?

[44] And can he do to the things that I do?

[45] Oh, no. I can take you high.

[46] Sometimes it's like somewhat.

[47] took a knife, baby edgy and dough, cut a six -inch valley through the middle of my skull.

[48] And I'd wake up with a sheet soaking wet and a freight train running through the middle of my head, and you can cool my desire.

[49] Sometimes it's like someone took a knife, baby, edgy, and dough and cut a six -inch valley through the middle of my skull.

[50] And I'd wake up with a sheet soaking wet and a freight train running through the middle of my head in you.

[51] can cool my desire.

[52] Look at my eyes.

[53] Totally welled up.

[54] Which only happens to me when I see Kristen sing.

[55] And then I think you.

[56] She made me cry when she's saying one time.

[57] Right?

[58] She does.

[59] She's got a thing.

[60] Well, I think too, like you and I share this.

[61] We love her.

[62] And so you can't help but be like so proud of her when she does this thing she can do so well.

[63] there's something so beautiful about it for sure yeah right and she doesn't she doesn't do it too often no always want i mean the whole time since since all the success i've always kind of wondered like when are you going to do more with that thing with a secret weapon and i've been with her for 10 and a half years i've probably seen her sing live um seven or eight times and every time just completely uncontrollable just water works yeah i don't get so far as to like uh vocally be sobbing uh because i haven't done that since I was about seven, but I am definitely well -d -depth.

[64] Does she get nervous about it?

[65] Oh, she totally is nervous about it.

[66] You know her.

[67] And it's not something she would do for me at home.

[68] I mean, she sings around the house, but never like, you know, 100 % go for it.

[69] And I guess to the stakes of being on stage and all that, just amplify the whole experience.

[70] But as I just said, the reason you love her too is, I know you because you and Kristen were childhood best friends.

[71] old buddies.

[72] Is that accurate to say?

[73] What age did you mean?

[74] I would say so.

[75] She was a year behind me. So we met in the 10th grade.

[76] And she was and we hung a little bit in high school.

[77] But honestly, it wasn't until she went off to college, I think.

[78] I had this really jealous girlfriend in high school.

[79] Right.

[80] Yes.

[81] I've heard of her.

[82] Have you heard of her?

[83] Absolutely.

[84] She didn't want me to hang out with Kristen too much.

[85] And so.

[86] Yeah.

[87] And first, I think probably she had some issues.

[88] And then secondly, also an intimidating best friend for your boyfriend to have probably in high school.

[89] I would think.

[90] That's true.

[91] She's super cute and you guys performed a ton together.

[92] That's not something you and your girlfriend were doing, I can't imagine.

[93] No, not really.

[94] As a matter of fact, Kristen did a post about me when she went on the Harry Connick show and on Instagram and said, hey, this one's for you.

[95] Because I idolize Harry Connick Jr. And she said, my friend and I used to get together and sing songs in high school.

[96] And I don't usually scroll through the comments, but I did happen to see this one comment.

[97] And this one guy said, yeah, your best friend was trying to get out of the friend zone.

[98] I think I've accused you of that prior to really oh I mean how do you know she's not trying to get out of the friend zone well okay yeah sure as I came to know you more you guys really don't have an attraction but my argument to her was because I think pretty black and white about these these male female issues to a fault so so do I and that's the thing and it's unconventional but I'm like if you if you want to go with it but I go look I'm Bob I'm Bob you know you're you we're in high school we're in high school together.

[99] We perform all the time together.

[100] How on earth did Bob not want to have sex with you?

[101] I just, I found that almost impossible to believe.

[102] But again, as I came to know you much better.

[103] I didn't deny anything like that.

[104] I do.

[105] Okay.

[106] Well, yeah.

[107] All right, let's just say the base levels you would have probably had sex with anyone attractive.

[108] I was in high school for Christ.

[109] Yes, of course.

[110] But you weren't actively preoccupied with trying to bed her.

[111] No. To my knowledge.

[112] Is this why you had me on here?

[113] This would be great if we expose.

[114] By the way, I could give a shit less if you had been trying to bet her.

[115] But, yeah, so you guys were really close in high school.

[116] And a couple of the things that I found very humorous about your history was that you guys used to perform at funerals, right?

[117] Weddings and funerals.

[118] You know, Kristen says that.

[119] But yeah, yeah, I do remember that.

[120] I don't particularly remember.

[121] By the way, I'm prepared for you to call bullshit on almost every story.

[122] No, that's, no, that sounds accurate.

[123] She might remember funerals better than me. Right.

[124] But, um, I hope there were some funerals.

[125] I know we did.

[126] You know, because we went to Catholic school.

[127] So there was a lot of church.

[128] A lot of church stuff.

[129] to be had.

[130] I remember her baby Berets.

[131] I had a crush on her and she, and then I started dating that the jealous girlfriend.

[132] Right.

[133] Let's call her one.

[134] It was what Kristen was out of town.

[135] And I think she went out of town with her family for a week.

[136] And then the girlfriend moved in.

[137] Okay.

[138] And I've had a few things like that in my high school years.

[139] I was like finding for a girl and she went out of town for like 48 hours.

[140] Then I met someone else.

[141] So you're like, yeah, right.

[142] So I had the attention span of a fruit fly.

[143] Right.

[144] I was like, I would have killed.

[145] for this gal, but she's in northern Michigan.

[146] She's in Marquette.

[147] There's no way I can...

[148] It's Muskegon.

[149] I got to run to Muskegon.

[150] Yeah, prepare for a lot of Michigan jokes that no one will get because we're all from Michigan.

[151] Yeah, right, fretters.

[152] Yeah, exit 69, Big Beaver.

[153] Fredders and ABC Warehouse.

[154] I like to think ABC Warehouse was a national change.

[155] But so you guys meet and then, is it, aside from the barrettes, do you guys immediately start talking about music?

[156] We were in musical together at some point.

[157] point.

[158] Oh, okay.

[159] So that must have been in.

[160] I can't remember, I can't really remember the first time we talked or anything like that.

[161] I think, I remember girls kind of being, I think they were kind of jealous.

[162] I remember they were saying some, saying some shit.

[163] Can I say, I can say, this is a podcast.

[164] Yeah, yeah.

[165] You can, you can say, um, shit.

[166] We cap it at shit.

[167] All right.

[168] Okay.

[169] If you want to say asshole, we prefer you say a hole.

[170] Can I say Earl Coitus?

[171] You can say Earl Coitus.

[172] Yeah, because that's the, that's the scientific thing.

[173] They were, they were talking some poop about Kristen's barrettes.

[174] Okay, right.

[175] They're, you know, like, who's this girl wearing baby barrettes?

[176] And, like, it's because it was super hip at the time.

[177] But, um, and so I think maybe I was kind of standoffish for a while because girls were jealous of her.

[178] So she was sort of like, you know, we should be talking to this, to this pose or something like that.

[179] I don't know what the deal is, but right.

[180] Everybody was jealous of her.

[181] Her perspective.

[182] I think girls felt very threatened by Kristen Bow.

[183] Oh, see.

[184] And that's, that's, um, refreshing to hear because, again, I, I only hear everything through her filter and, um, we are so diametrically opposed.

[185] in general that when she says stuff that seems implausible to me, I go, well, maybe that is how it worked at Catholic school.

[186] Right.

[187] Right.

[188] But I do find it hard to believe that she would have been pretty and super talented and people would have just been so supportive of that in high school.

[189] That seems a little bit threatening.

[190] No, yeah, I would think so.

[191] I don't think I'd suffered that in high school.

[192] You didn't.

[193] Because I'm not super good looking.

[194] You're a nine, kind of, where she's a 10.

[195] Yeah, I'm a bit of a, you know, mutant.

[196] What do mutants go through in high school usually?

[197] Well, usually they get, if we're to believe the movies, they get pissed at one point and then they destroy the cafeteria and then they got to get whisked away to like a special power school.

[198] Right.

[199] That was kind of a willow in high school.

[200] What is Willow usually?

[201] Willow the little person from the movie.

[202] Warwick Davies.

[203] Oh, yeah.

[204] I'm always astounded by your knowledge of actors' names.

[205] She was homecoming queen, right?

[206] Warwick Davies?

[207] Yeah.

[208] Diane Warwick?

[209] What?

[210] I don't remember.

[211] This is terrible.

[212] There's a picture of her.

[213] At least in the court.

[214] She was at least on the court, probably.

[215] Was she number one?

[216] I don't know.

[217] I think you've got to get nominated to be on that, though.

[218] So people have to like you.

[219] Oh, yeah.

[220] If you make it on the court, you've clearly, you've jumped over a lot of hurdles.

[221] If I find out she wasn't number one, though, I think I do need to rethink the whole relationship.

[222] When did you start playing music, Bob?

[223] When I was a kid, my mom started me on piano.

[224] We had a piano on the house.

[225] What is a kid?

[226] Six years old?

[227] Five.

[228] Five?

[229] You know, I mean, that's as far as I can remember.

[230] I remember she taught me sentimental journey.

[231] She, like, knew a little bit.

[232] I was like, and that was the song we danced to.

[233] My mom and I danced at my wedding, actually.

[234] And is it something that you liked right away or something you felt?

[235] Oh, you did?

[236] You didn't feel like homework to you, the practicing and everything?

[237] No, practicing always feels like homework to me a little bit, actually.

[238] I think it was more, the practicing that I'm supposed to do.

[239] Yeah.

[240] Practicing the technique and practicing.

[241] But just sitting down and jam.

[242] Are either of your parents' musicians?

[243] My dad plays the guitar.

[244] a little bit.

[245] He was in a band in high school.

[246] He was in a band called The Jester's.

[247] Of course.

[248] In college.

[249] Sure.

[250] Super sweet in the 60s.

[251] Yeah, they probably did Monke's covers or something like that.

[252] And my mom sang in choirs and stuff.

[253] My mom, my mom's claiming to fame.

[254] She got a voice lesson with Duke Ellington because she sang in this.

[255] Do you believe that?

[256] She's, I don't, I do.

[257] I know you believe she said that.

[258] I did until you just said, do you believe that?

[259] Right.

[260] Because my mom, God bless her, she's my number one lady.

[261] But there are some stories as I've gotten older.

[262] I'm like, is that, could that have a really happened.

[263] So I'm just curious, you know, what are the odds of your mom really vocal trained to Kellington?

[264] My mom is full of shit.

[265] Well, then another thing about if you're from Michigan like we both are, everyone knows someone who was in Bob Seeger's band or, you know, claims do have been in Bob Seeger's band at some point.

[266] And it's just after you meet the 20th person who's been in Bob Seeger's band, it just gets a little suspicious.

[267] Right, right.

[268] I had, our landlord was Drew Abbott, who was the original guitarist of the Silver Bullet Band.

[269] Oh, really?

[270] No joke.

[271] They all grew up in Birmingham, right?

[272] They did, yeah.

[273] Again, I had a stepdad who claimed he played their prom, that they were classmates and peers.

[274] I've met like six stepdads that specifically stepdad.

[275] Like the prom.

[276] Yeah.

[277] Yeah, it's a real step.

[278] And then this is totally off topic.

[279] But then my best childhood friend, Aaron Weekly, he had a stepdad.

[280] I mean, they never actually wed, but, you know, he claimed he struck out Kirk Gibson.

[281] in Little League.

[282] So I think there's all these regional fucking lies that are pretty common.

[283] It's dumbing me out because you're wiping all these things off the list of things, I believe.

[284] But let's just assume for the time being that she did train with Duke Ellington.

[285] How did that even come about?

[286] She was singing in a choir at U of D called the Don Large chorus.

[287] And Don Large was kind of a, he was kind of like the, he was kind of like the choral guru of Detroit.

[288] like the perfect way to be a winner and a loser all at the same time.

[289] Sure.

[290] And, um, and he was asked to do a gospel concert or he was asked to supply the choir for a gospel concert that Duke Ellington was doing.

[291] Okay.

[292] So this, this is getting more and more plausible.

[293] Yeah.

[294] So each, and she sang in the down large chorus.

[295] And so she pulled her aside and said, you're, no, you're sharp here, you're flat here, you're perfect here.

[296] I think each kid got like five minutes.

[297] Oh, that's cool.

[298] So, so, so is, no, it's nothing, it's not super bragworthy, but, but it is like the fact that you were in the same room with Duke Ellington.

[299] Yeah.

[300] Who's arguably, you know, one of the top five musicians in the 20th century.

[301] You know, I'm just theorizing now.

[302] But I do think when people meet people like that, like a Duke Ellington in their childhood, somehow it does break a barrier where you go like, oh, I've actually seen this person in 3D.

[303] I've touched them.

[304] So this is something that's possible.

[305] Yeah.

[306] Like you do, I hear a lot of stories of successful people who do you have a run in with somebody they idolized early on.

[307] And then somehow realizing they occupied the same.

[308] same time and space as this person made the goal maybe more attainable.

[309] So are you the type of kid?

[310] Because in my experience, the kids in my school that were like virtuoso's at guitar, they were pretty reclusive because acquiring that talent requires you sit in your room by yourself and get weird, right?

[311] Yeah.

[312] Were you doing that?

[313] Were you that kid?

[314] I was doing it.

[315] I'm one of six kids.

[316] So we had people all over the house.

[317] And you're a middle child.

[318] So it was hard to get, it was hard to get alone.

[319] Yeah.

[320] A third of six kids.

[321] So it's hard to get alone.

[322] So I would do it with them all around.

[323] And I would get told to stop a lot of the time because it was because, yeah, it gets weird.

[324] I wonder if that helps, though, building up some kind of confidence.

[325] And as far as - Getting vulnerable.

[326] Performing in front of people.

[327] Simply because it's the only way you could prove.

[328] Yeah, I was, yeah, right.

[329] And they probably hated it.

[330] Siblings are so fucking mean to each other.

[331] They were probably saying the worst things that people could save you.

[332] No, my mom.

[333] That was the worst.

[334] Oh, really?

[335] We'd drive her nuts.

[336] Oh, okay.

[337] And she was the one who was pushing me to learn the most.

[338] But she'd be in the kitchen.

[339] She's like, I can't take it anymore.

[340] But with five other kids running around stuff too.

[341] Like if you're never naked alone, you're going to get pretty comfortable being naked in front of people.

[342] That's right.

[343] Were you guys off to, were you also nude in front of each other a lot as siblings?

[344] I asked this sincerely because my brother and I never were.

[345] We were.

[346] Oh, you were?

[347] Yeah, it was weird, man. Like we'd get out of the bathtub.

[348] And I think we could have used some direction.

[349] some parenting in that area and stuff because like the babysitter had come over and like hey and everyone was just nude everyone I can tell you probably the weirdest moment my brother and I ever shared was he you know he he had beat me up daily my entire life because he was five years older than me and then we hadn't fought for a while because he was now 19 and I was 14 and he had moved out but he was kind of house sitting when my mom was out of town and it was the morning of this our big basketball game our cross -town rival basketball game.

[350] So I was, like, playing Metallic upstairs.

[351] He's downstairs with his girlfriend.

[352] Apparently, they're sleeping nude because he comes upstairs in a towel to my bedroom.

[353] And he says, you've got to fucking turn that down.

[354] And now I'm like, you know, you're not my boss anymore, you know.

[355] And, you know, one thing leads to another.

[356] We get in this huge fight and his towel comes off in the middle of the fight.

[357] So he's bare naked.

[358] And I'm wearing a suit because when we had away games in basketball, you had to wear a suit to school.

[359] So I'm fighting in a full.

[360] suit and he's bare naked.

[361] And I remember like getting distracted by seeing his penis and his pubic hair and stuff.

[362] And then I ultimately won that fight, which was the first time I ever beat him.

[363] And it was such a great way to go into this very important basketball game.

[364] And anyways, he was nude.

[365] And then he, I finally let him up from the bed because it had ended on my waterbed.

[366] I pinned him on my water bed.

[367] And then I let him up and he had to get up bare naked and then he had to cross the room to get the towel and put it back on it.

[368] As he was putting his towel back, on, he said, you know who won, even though it was very, very clear who won.

[369] But whatever, yeah, I just remember feeling very awkward about the fact that my brother was naked in front of me. Again, because we didn't have a dad in the house, so we weren't seen, I wasn't seeing like full -grown men naked, right, as I guess, most boys do.

[370] It would be interesting, though, to be like, like, I've got to beat up this guy naked, but the other guy's like, I got to beat up this naked guy.

[371] So it's kind of who is it worse for?

[372] Yeah, I don't think it was great for either of us.

[373] Stay tuned for more.

[374] armchair expert, if you dare.

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[391] But, you know, the compliment means nothing coming from me because I really have no musical expertise, but by my estimation you are a musical genius.

[392] There are been numerous times you would visit and I heard you sing and I thought you were just incredible and you'd be playing in our living room sometimes just by yourself and I'd be eavesdropping and I always loved it.

[393] And then when I did hit and run, I asked you, hey, could you reinterpret the song Hot Rod Lincoln, right?

[394] Yeah, that was a good moment.

[395] Yeah.

[396] I felt good about that.

[397] Yeah, and I just kind of asked you out of the blue.

[398] You were in Michigan like, hey, could you?

[399] is there any way to make hot rod lincoln cool and you sent me like three versions and then one version it just blew my fucking mind we went really yes it was so great you don't remember it do you of course no i don't remember i don't remember the words i remember something like yeah that's i remember that i remember that stuff you made this super cool version of hot rod lincoln and then we cut an early trailer of the movie to that song and then we took that ipad around and that's how we sold it internationally.

[400] It was so inspired and awesome.

[401] And then based on that, I asked you if you would score the movie, which you had never done.

[402] And this was, this was rife for disaster because I had not directed a movie where I had, I had directed one other movie, but there was no score in the movie.

[403] Nor had I done a score yet.

[404] Nor had you done a score.

[405] So I don't have the tools to communicate with you what I need.

[406] I also don't have the the musical vocabulary so I can only say to you like I kind of want it like out of sight but also like um uh you know Willie Wonka and I and then I want this and you know for me it's a very hard moment in the movie making process because I don't speak the language you know I can talk to actors I can talk to a cinematographer but I mean that's 98 % of the gig half the time and when someone speaks and you can get lost in the language anyway yeah but so then you and I set out on this this project um to score hit and run which was a really really fun process totally and how was it from your vantage point i was i was excited about it and i was nervous about it and i remember you said hey man i loved what you did with hot rod lincoln and i'd love you to take i'd love you to take you to take you to take a crack at the whole thing and i was like man of course yes you know and i'm and like nobody wants to hear man that's going to be hard i'm not ready for that and so yeah um so i got on the called my buddy colton from um philly and he came and live with me for two weeks and recorded everything uh -huh and he had some actual technical training oh yeah in movie scoring specifically right he's a killer engineer and he went to UCLA i think for for his graduate work in film composing and uh yeah he's a what a lucky thing that you happen to know him right yeah i mean i know a lot of guys like that a lot of engineers because because my engineering is so mediocre that i kind of need to have them around and stuff.

[407] Right.

[408] But Colton is one of the, Colton's maybe the best engineer I know.

[409] He's amazing.

[410] And he's so, and he's so, um, so unsuspecting about it.

[411] He just gets in there and he does it.

[412] And he got a better mix in my living room than, than anything I've ever heard.

[413] In fact, I sent, we sent over, um, waltz of hate.

[414] Yeah.

[415] That's my favorite thing in the movie.

[416] Yeah.

[417] Yeah.

[418] And if you've seen hit and run, this is the moment where, um, uh, drags a guy.

[419] along the sidewalk with a leash.

[420] We had a, um, and my friend came in and played drums on that and he was black and I was like, I, I showed him the scene and I was like, I can't show you the scene.

[421] You know what's funny about that scene is, um, I haven't really, I don't think I've heard too much criticism of that, but I did, um, or my mother -in -law on parenthood, the woman who is playing my mother -in -law, who I came to have just the greatest relationship with.

[422] And she, you know, felt comfortable enough to say to me, you know, it's a little, it's a little dicey that you basically lynch a black guy.

[423] You know, Bradley puts a leash around the guy.

[424] It wasn't a hate crime.

[425] Well, here was my, here was my defense of the whole thing was that scene had been written because I stole it, I stole that scene piece mail from a TV show I had written.

[426] And in the TV show, it was a white guy.

[427] It was set in North Carolina.

[428] And he had like one of those bright orange tank tops, you know, these weightlifter dude.

[429] you see that are like over the hill.

[430] So in my mind, it was always going to be a white guy.

[431] So I write the scene with a white guy.

[432] I'm not thinking of any of the implications of, you know, putting something around someone's neck and, you know, I'm not thinking of the lynching correlation.

[433] So I get to the moment where I've got to now cast this role.

[434] Well, I need a guy that's humongous who can also jump in the air, six feet in the air and then fall on his back, right?

[435] So my son coordinator says, oh my God, I have the perfect guy for you.

[436] The Duffy brothers, have you ever heard of these guys?

[437] They're humongous.

[438] and they're super athletic and they're stunt guys and they connect.

[439] So I auditioned one of them in a hotel room.

[440] I applaud this guy.

[441] He had to come in the weirdest circumstance of fucking audition in my hotel room while we were shooting and he was great and I was so excited to give him that part.

[442] Again, at no point am I thinking of any racial implications of this but then when you do see the movie, it's very easy to draw that kind of conclusion.

[443] And, you know, my defense is I would have rather have hired that guy who earned that role and whatever.

[444] you can think what you think and I can live with that.

[445] I didn't think anything of it, but I was afraid to show it to a black guy.

[446] Exactly, yeah, yeah, which is very fair.

[447] Right.

[448] We tried a lot of different stuff with that and we tried a lot of goofy stuff.

[449] And there are moments where I have this on video somewhere where you hear us, you hear us just kind of like keeling over and laughing.

[450] Because we tried stuff like, that kind of thing where like this guy's getting strapping.

[451] Wrangles and dragged down the street.

[452] Yeah.

[453] He was like an early.

[454] That would have left me with no defense of, I think that would have tipped the scale.

[455] I thought about sending it to you.

[456] I was like, I don't think, I think he's too stressed to do with this, man. Yeah.

[457] But we sent that track over to your engineer at the time.

[458] Uh -huh.

[459] And he was so impressed, but he was like, where did you record this?

[460] What mics did you use?

[461] Blah, blah, blah.

[462] And I was like, this mic in my living room.

[463] And that's the kind of stuff, Colton, the sound engineer, that's the kind of stuff you can do.

[464] I mean, he can just take.

[465] Yeah.

[466] You can take a lemon of a room.

[467] in particular in that song is off the charts.

[468] It's so great.

[469] And we ended up reusing it.

[470] I think we used it over the title sequence.

[471] It was also used.

[472] Somebody got the Detroit Police Department got a hold of that movie and they really like that song and they used it.

[473] There was this viral YouTube series of police departments all over the country doing the running man. Oh, really?

[474] Yeah.

[475] No, and I got a, and I got presented an award from the Detroit Chief of Police.

[476] Oh, you did?

[477] It's kind of a badass.

[478] Oh, wow.

[479] You're virtually on the department now.

[480] Yeah.

[481] Yeah, it's really cool.

[482] And they loved it, man. They thought it was the greatest thing.

[483] Yeah.

[484] So that was a very fun experience for us.

[485] And then you also made a really cool version of the Chips theme song early on.

[486] I said, can you kind of do that?

[487] Can you do the Bob Murvac magic and make this chip song?

[488] You made that chip song.

[489] We then found out that the writing was $500.

[490] They wanted $500 ,000 for that.

[491] And then ultimately, I don't know how.

[492] awkward.

[493] You felt about it, but I was in a very awkward position of you had scored hit and run with with my friend Julian Woss, who also did some songs for it.

[494] And as happens when you do a studio movie, they basically say, here's a list of 12 people you can have composed the movie.

[495] Right.

[496] You know, they've done movies for us in the past.

[497] And so go ahead and familiarize yourself with them and you get to pick one.

[498] But that's it.

[499] You don't get to bring your composer.

[500] So I ultimately felt very guilty that I wasn't then able to offer you that job.

[501] I felt terrible about that.

[502] I felt terrible about that.

[503] I felt terrible about not being able to use my editor from hit and run.

[504] Oh, yeah.

[505] No, I loved Keith.

[506] Remember you were bumped about that.

[507] That one's even sadder because I had gone in there and they said, do you have an editor?

[508] I said, yes, Keith.

[509] And they said, great.

[510] And then they did not tell me until two days before we started shooting.

[511] Oh, by the way, you can't have Keith.

[512] He's not done any movies for us.

[513] And so you need to pick from this list.

[514] So I actually had to call Keith and say, this job I told you you have and now don't have.

[515] Right.

[516] It's fucking heartbreaking.

[517] I hated it.

[518] I get it.

[519] I mean, I want to use my own dudes for everything.

[520] Everybody wants to, I mean, that's just more of a corporate version of using your own dudes.

[521] Everybody wants to use their own dude.

[522] Look, I can make their argument or I can make mine.

[523] And their argument is, is very simple.

[524] They're shelling out $25 million.

[525] They've been fucked royally in the past.

[526] And they have a bunch of people that have delivered for them in the past.

[527] So there's only so much risk they're willing to take on.

[528] And so you end up fighting other battles.

[529] And you're going to win if there's 20 battles, you know, you're going to win maybe three of them.

[530] So you got to pick which ones.

[531] And you usually.

[532] it's going to be cast.

[533] You know, you're going to fight for an actor.

[534] They don't want.

[535] You're going to spend a lot of capital doing that.

[536] And then you can't call them an hour later and go, I'm not doing the movie without Bob Murbach.

[537] Right.

[538] You know, so it is very stressful to have not been able to bring everyone who I loved working with on hit and run.

[539] I got to bring some people, but I didn't get to bring everyone.

[540] That was, you know, I met a lot of great people too.

[541] So that was really cool.

[542] And so you and Kristen are performing in high school.

[543] And you guys are making money, right?

[544] You're getting.

[545] paid?

[546] Yeah.

[547] Yeah.

[548] You know, whatever it was, you know, 50 bucks a service or something like that.

[549] Man, in high school, like high school in the 90s, 50 bucks.

[550] Yeah, that's a whole weekend.

[551] That's a good time.

[552] With your hot wife.

[553] Yeah.

[554] With your super hot wife.

[555] I never wanted to have sex with.

[556] And when do you start, when do you, when do you start loading up enough gigs where you go, oh, I'm going to be able to do this professionally?

[557] It's a good question.

[558] I started going, I think I started looking.

[559] at music schools halfway through high school or something.

[560] Uh -huh.

[561] And I wanted to do that whole thing.

[562] And you got into one in New York, but you didn't go.

[563] Is that?

[564] I got to win in Boston.

[565] I got into Berkeley.

[566] Okay.

[567] And Boston got a partial scholarship to Berkeley.

[568] Uh -huh.

[569] An audition for that.

[570] I think at the time it was 30 grand a year.

[571] My parents didn't have the other 25K.

[572] Right.

[573] Boy, they really meant partial when they said partial.

[574] They were only going to pay five grand.

[575] Yeah, they were going to pay five grand or something.

[576] I think I kind of, I think I kind of beef that audition.

[577] Word other things.

[578] Oh, really?

[579] I wanted to study jazz.

[580] I don't even think.

[581] I don't know if Berkeley does really any classical concern, but that was all I had done leading up to that.

[582] And I think I actually went into this jazz audition and played a show pan atude.

[583] No, I think I did all right.

[584] I mean, you know, I got five grand.

[585] Right.

[586] Right.

[587] Only at $5 ,000.

[588] You screwed.

[589] What is that like a 16 % scholarship?

[590] I don't sure what the numbers are in there.

[591] Was it stressful as hell to audition?

[592] I was really nervous.

[593] Yeah.

[594] Yeah.

[595] Yeah, it was really nervous.

[596] And I don't think I knew what I want to do.

[597] I still don't I think I know what I want to do.

[598] So I ended up going into jazz at Wayne State in Detroit.

[599] And I had kind of this mentor there who kind of straightened me out with jazz theory and harmony.

[600] And I knew that I loved that harmony.

[601] And I didn't know how to make it happen.

[602] And I had this teacher.

[603] Who are your favorite jazz pianists?

[604] I was obsessed with Harry Connick Jr. And he was kind of my gateway into it.

[605] And I think sometimes, you know, there are a lot of music nerds who are maybe, quick to write him off because he's not one of the old dudes.

[606] That guy's the finest pianist alive.

[607] I mean, he was practically raised by the Marcellus who were the first family of jazz.

[608] Oh, yeah, Wynton and Ellis.

[609] Yeah, and he's like the real deal.

[610] And so I think you'll hear a lot of his influence in my playing and stuff like that.

[611] I love him.

[612] Well, you know, from the outside, again, having no musical education.

[613] To me, I was like, oh, I see this guy's kind of a throwback.

[614] He's got like a gimmick, right?

[615] And then I took a jazz history class in Santa Bar.

[616] Barbara.

[617] And I had to watch all these videos of his concerts.

[618] And when I saw him play the drums, I was like, holy shit.

[619] This guy's like a fucking premier drummer.

[620] He's a nut job, man. Yeah, he's an incredible drummer.

[621] And then, you know, when you hear other legends kind of talk of him, then you realize like, oh, as you just said, he's probably the best living penis.

[622] Yeah.

[623] You and Kristen share a favorite Harry Connick song.

[624] Oh, yeah.

[625] Well, I don't know that that's my favorite song, but like in high school, we were really into that.

[626] I kind of get more into his style.

[627] And that was the one he played for her on the show.

[628] And I don't think he had played it in 20 years or something like that.

[629] But did he still crush it?

[630] Oh yeah.

[631] He killed it.

[632] Always.

[633] I mean, yeah.

[634] He's also so good looking.

[635] He's got he's incredibly charming too.

[636] He's got that Norland's accent.

[637] Right, right, right.

[638] Oh my God.

[639] He must have really had a easy way of things.

[640] He's actually got a British accent.

[641] It's just, it's fake.

[642] Yeah, yeah.

[643] It's like, he goes offstage and he's like, no, I get more into his, um, into more of his style.

[644] he does this uh he does this thing i don't know he gets into that new orleans yeah he i love that i love that new orleans again i'm such a lay person that um from my perspective you're a 10 as a musician um and there there couldn't be anything more repugnant than being asked to to rate yourself but because i don't know anything if harry conic is a 10 where do you think your skill level is i don't know i would hate to be asked this question but i have to ask For being able to do what he does, I mean, he's, he's the best at what he does.

[645] Right.

[646] So if I'm doing his thing.

[647] Yeah.

[648] If I'm doing, I'm the best at what I, I'm the best at my thing.

[649] Right.

[650] And so I think, I mean, I think I have certain gifts that no other musicians.

[651] But would you say that your strength is more creativity than, uh, technical playing?

[652] Uh, or are they on par?

[653] No, I'd say, because I think you're incredibly creative.

[654] That I, yes.

[655] Yeah, no, I would say, I think I, I think the, I think the creative side of me trumps the ability.

[656] but I don't because you're weird you're off your left of center I try to be yeah yeah I've been doing a lot of studio like a lot of pop records the last you know five years and I feel like it gets kind of you know they get kind of antiseptic and I try to be as creative as I can on them but but it's not usually encouraged and you know they want they want what they want yeah they want inside the box and so and you got a that's a muscle you know you got to you got to you got to strengthen that muscle did you feel that way on chips you got a big studio you got a bunch of money and and you got it Well, when I feel that way is the difference between being a lead in a movie and a supporting character.

[657] So if you're a supporting character in a movie, which I often am, you are there to facilitate the leads storyline.

[658] And so it's not necessarily time for you to shine.

[659] Do you think most of the leads still have a lot of creative room?

[660] Mojo?

[661] No, I mean, like they're granted a lot of creative space from the director.

[662] I guess it's director to director.

[663] But there are, you know, it varies so much among actors.

[664] Some actors hate to improv, hate to make it their own.

[665] They love the text.

[666] They want to learn it inside now.

[667] And obviously, I respect the hell out of that.

[668] I would be bored doing that kind of like as a pursuit of like trying to perfectly execute what the writer thought of two years ago.

[669] I can admit there's some irony in here because I am sometimes that writer.

[670] And then I do want that person to somewhat do what I had imagined.

[671] But yeah, I think it all just varies on whatever you're, whatever, whatever excites you about the thing.

[672] And I imagine for you what excites you is your little filter, your interpretation of all this stuff.

[673] Yeah.

[674] Well, I did a movie, as you know, a few years ago.

[675] Uh -huh.

[676] You acted in a movie.

[677] I acted in a movie.

[678] A George Clooney movie.

[679] I am equally as much of a layman with acting.

[680] Not even a layman.

[681] I'm not even the same universe as you think you are as a musician.

[682] I think they're actually dead comparable because you've seen a million movies and all I've done is watched or listen to a million albums.

[683] I don't know.

[684] I think you have more musical ability than you give yourself.

[685] Well, I play the drums.

[686] Kristen used the word tone deaf.

[687] You were not tone deaf.

[688] I may or may not be tone deaf, but I at least am a three out of ten drummer.

[689] Yeah.

[690] And I'm a one out of ten guitar player.

[691] What's great is, even though I have no skill, I know what it's like to ride the euphoria of having created some.

[692] melody and use it like a drug.

[693] I do know what that feels like.

[694] I think you're also not afraid to say what you, I think because of your peripheral participation in music, you're not afraid to just like what you like.

[695] And you don't feel pressured to like what everybody else is liking.

[696] And your taste.

[697] Hence my love for Steely Dan.

[698] Yeah.

[699] My open declaration.

[700] Your taste in music almost intimidates me. I mean, you were pulling out deep stuff that I'd never heard.

[701] And you said, I kind of want something like this for hit and run.

[702] And you were pulling out Afro pop that I'm like, Like, what is he?

[703] And so you just hear something.

[704] You're like, I like that.

[705] Yeah.

[706] And jingo.

[707] Right.

[708] Yeah.

[709] Yeah.

[710] Yeah.

[711] Yeah.

[712] That was the song.

[713] Yeah.

[714] These guys are great.

[715] But I did.

[716] I didn't know that I had never, I mean, I'd never been.

[717] This is back to your acting.

[718] Yeah.

[719] It was a George Clooney movie.

[720] It was a George Clooney movie.

[721] It was called The Iads of March.

[722] The Iids of Mark.

[723] He directed it, right?

[724] Yeah, he directed it.

[725] And he was in it.

[726] Yeah, he started in it.

[727] And Ryan Gosling was the big deal in that movie.

[728] And Philip Seymour Hoffman, it was one of the last movies he did.

[729] And Marissa Tomey, Paul GMI.

[730] It was like, real shitty cast.

[731] All these dudes.

[732] I came in and I was playing the piano.

[733] I was practicing, warming up for the movie.

[734] And I hear that, you know, there's a drum set on stage.

[735] And I hear the drums start playing.

[736] I turn around.

[737] And Ryan Gosling's playing drums.

[738] Oh, really?

[739] Where am I, man?

[740] That is surreal.

[741] And it was surreal.

[742] Was he any good?

[743] Yeah, yeah, he sounded good.

[744] He's fine.

[745] He does some music.

[746] And I know I didn't see that, I didn't see that most recent thing.

[747] The jazz, what is it?

[748] The jazz.

[749] Oh, La La Land?

[750] Yeah, I didn't see it.

[751] Uh -huh.

[752] But I heard, but I heard he played well in it.

[753] Yeah.

[754] And I know he does some music projects on the side, something bones.

[755] What a dick.

[756] I don't know.

[757] Yeah, he's very creative.

[758] He's also a Formula One race car driver.

[759] Oh, is he really?

[760] Nothing would shock me to find out Ryan Gisley.

[761] But, but they approach the script like, that and they were um i think most i think george cluny as a director probably just said i hire the dudes i want and i let them go yeah just don't make me you know any good managers like don't make me manage just use your talents and i saw i had a copy of the script and uh this was mind -blowing to me and probably not to a professional actor but um i mean that script was a suggestion at most and i watched them do this scene 10 times and it was a conversation i mean it was a conversation between like three or four people in this bar and they just vibed off each other and and I mean it changed dramatically the dialogue yeah scene to scene yeah and it was like in this at the risk of sounding cheesy it was like and watching jazz musicians play and you have a form and you have an idea uh -huh you know where you're in theory is supposed to go yeah yeah right you have maybe kind of a destination in mind and then you just well that's locked in and they went to they just went to mars and there were there were times when philip seymor hoffin would scream i got to take a shit uh -huh and would walk up offstage.

[762] And I think the line was something like, I got to hit the head or something like that.

[763] Right.

[764] I got to take a shit.

[765] And it was, it was crazy, man. And I realized those were deeply talented people.

[766] Yeah.

[767] I would say that's the minority of projects, you know, that generally it's not chaos like that.

[768] But parenthood was six years of chaos like that.

[769] And I used to feel so bad for the guest stars that would come in because we all had all this practice with one another of navigating and staying on story but going berserk as you say and these poor guest stars they'd have this dialogue that really didn't make any sense anymore like they didn't even know where they're supposed to come in because i'm supposed to say i needed a 10 pound bag of potatoes and then they're lying right but i'm not saying that anymore right right and i just really i had a lot of sympathy for those folks but you got a but man when you developed like something like that over five six seasons yeah i mean you got it you can't unfortunately you can't dumb it down to your least common denominator right go with that so um you're This makes me think of a story.

[770] I don't know that this is true.

[771] Don't sue me. But apparently, the story I've been told is that David Crusoe on CSI or whatever, he takes his sunglasses on and off.

[772] And apparently from an actor, I talked to who did an episode of that, is that he rewrites his dialogue the night before they're shooting.

[773] And then when you get there, he hasn't rewritten your dialogue.

[774] So you now have all this dialogue that makes no sense whatsoever.

[775] Wow.

[776] And it's kind of a Brando.

[777] Like Brando used to like piss people off like that.

[778] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[779] In fact, um, um, Jane Fonda was just on Howard Stern last week talking about, he was like, oh, what was it like to work with Brando?

[780] And she's like, you know, if I'm being honest, it was miserable because nothing I had made sense.

[781] Right.

[782] You had to like join his weird little trip.

[783] Yeah.

[784] And we put a feather in his hair.

[785] So not fair.

[786] I mean, easily it tips from like creative to total arrogance and self -sent narcissism.

[787] quite easily there's a very thin line between those two things um just a psychopath but you were on this movie and then you called me at a certain point right yeah which you just reminded me of today uh i said i well i said man if you you know i i'm about to go work with george cluny with all the legends of hollywood for my first project yeah yeah yeah yeah thrown into the fire yeah but your first time ever throwing the football is at the super bowl right right exactly i've been invited to play uh football That's kind of what I thought about Taylor Swift when she came out.

[788] Because I remember a lot of people were saying, man, like, she's not singing that well.

[789] And I was like, yeah, that's because most musicians learned to sing in bars for 10 years before they play at Madison Square Garden.

[790] Like her first gig.

[791] Right.

[792] You know, she like cut her teeth on like, you know, radio city gigs.

[793] Right.

[794] Yeah, exactly.

[795] And that's kind of what that felt like a little bit, you know, my first acting gig.

[796] No, I called you.

[797] And I said I may as well, you know, call one of the more famous people I know.

[798] And I was like, do you know Ryan Gosling?

[799] Do you know George Clooney?

[800] And I remember you had said, you said, I have not met either of those guys.

[801] And you said, but I love Ryan Gosling.

[802] And I remember you were fan.

[803] And you said, I don't know, give me two seconds of advice going into my first movie gig.

[804] And you were like, they hired you for you.

[805] So just be you.

[806] Yeah.

[807] Which is about the hardest thing you can.

[808] Yeah, exactly.

[809] Easy advice to give and very hard to do.

[810] And you said you got the gig based on what you did.

[811] give them what you gave them that's what they want the auditions for them and then when you get that onset your time like you jump through the the hoop yeah that's true and if you don't make that time for you then none of the experience was for you right right of course the auditions for them yeah that's true trying to give them what they want but once they've hired you I do think it should be for you or there'll be no part of it that is for you well and a good and a good director would assume that about you too I mean they want to give you the ball Yeah.

[812] I mean, look, in my opinion, what a good director is doing is he's letting the actor be in charge of the moment and making that moment real.

[813] But he has his eye on the grander prize, which is the overarching story.

[814] So he has to make sure that that moment ultimately fits into this big, long arc of a story.

[815] So really, the difference between the actor and the director is one has a macro view and one has a micro view.

[816] And you got to figure out the Steve Jobs movie.

[817] He said he conducted the orchestra.

[818] He said all these, that was in defense of not being a great computer programmer.

[819] He'd be like, those guys are the violinists.

[820] I conduct the orchestra.

[821] Right, right.

[822] I think that was his thing.

[823] He had a real charming level of arrogance.

[824] Yeah, right.

[825] And quite often when you're acting, you have to make some sacrifices.

[826] You have to do some shit that is inauthentic in that moment to service the bigger story.

[827] Right.

[828] It always feels a little shitty, but you know, you're there to do that ultimately.

[829] So you get this role and you have lines?

[830] No lines.

[831] No lines.

[832] You sang, and what song did you sing?

[833] He picked three, and he picked.

[834] George did.

[835] Yeah, George Clooney did.

[836] Did he find him to be musically proficient?

[837] Did he, did he?

[838] Well, his aunt was Rosemary Clooney.

[839] Oh, right, right, right, right.

[840] The famed the iconic jazz singer.

[841] Uh -huh.

[842] So he must know all of that.

[843] He was her driver when he was a kid.

[844] He was like 15 or something.

[845] He used to drive her around.

[846] And he was telling me stories about that.

[847] Back when you could be a professional livery at 15.

[848] Right, yeah, exactly.

[849] Yeah, he was a driver at 11.

[850] and yeah i know he said yeah he said that when he was a kid i did i auditioned uh well i auditioned for the casting company and um and i think he went through some videos and he picked mine they were hanging out there was this bar called cliff bells that they were hanging out at in town um that they really liked and i think they got to know the the owner a little bit and and i know the owner well and did you play gigs there yeah and he claims that he that he vouched for me he said like he said to, he said to George Clooney, you know, like, hey, man, you know, Bob Murvac.

[851] And he said, yeah, we're looking at him and a couple other people.

[852] And I guess he said something like, hey, who put you in charge of this outfit?

[853] Hire Bob Murvac.

[854] So, so he picked out three songs.

[855] And I did.

[856] I kind of picked his brain about Rosemary Clooney.

[857] Like every second we had a chance to talk, I talked to him.

[858] And he told me some old stories because, I mean, he was, he was like one generation removed from that golden era of jazz musicians, but he was so connected to it because of his aunt.

[859] and he picked out three songs he likes having jazz music in his movies he picked out angel eyes what's that beautiful old ballad I've heard Sinatra do it that was the one I really that was the one I really clung to to learn this tune he smokes during the performance he coughs during the performance but it's like great the juge yeah yeah he just kind of goes off the money he goes yeah and he's like it's great he's probably wasted And he's just, he's just like miserable.

[860] But it's a killer.

[861] Do you want to hear, are we going to do?

[862] Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.

[863] Let me hear.

[864] Let's see if I can remember this.

[865] Try to think that love's not around, but it's uncomfortably near.

[866] My poor heart ain't gaining any ground.

[867] And my angel eyes ain't here Angel eyes that old devil scent They glow Unbearably bright Need I say that my loves Miss spent Misspent with angel eyes tonight So drink up All you people Order anything you see And have fun All you happy people The drinks and the laughs on me Pardon me But I gotta run The facts uncommonly clear I gotta find Who's now And why my angel eyes Ain't here Skew diso I want to have some scotch and some camel non -filter cigarettes.

[868] Such a scotch and cigarette song, man. Yeah, that really, you know, have to run straight to a meeting after this.

[869] So he picked that one and two other ones, and I learned all those.

[870] Let's get away from it all, which is another big Sinatra one, and we'll meet again, which was like a World War II era.

[871] We'll meet again, don't know where, I don't know when, but I know we'll meet again some sunny day, like classic American songbook stuff.

[872] kept saying, every time I would do it, you'd be like, just quiet, quiet, just a little bit quiet.

[873] Oh, really?

[874] Yeah, just, just like, just throw it away a little more.

[875] Yeah, and we did like maybe four or five takes and he was like, so good, so good.

[876] And he was like, when he was kind of convincing me to do it slower.

[877] I think it was at a point where I felt like, I don't know if I can go quieter than this man. This is insane.

[878] Like, I'm willing to.

[879] Yeah.

[880] But I don't know if like volume exists at that level.

[881] Right.

[882] And, and he said, he was like, listen, one more.

[883] And he said, Diane Reeve, wanted to do lullabya birdland all up up tempo and I said no man do it as a ball do it and she said no no no I want to swing it out she wanted to give it this energy because she finally relented and did it and did as a balance she got I can't say the app can I say oh you see whatever you want I thought you really put a cat on the N word but aside from that I think you're good to go why oh so Bob it's 2018 okay yeah yeah you can't say that and he said he said dying reason and she finally relented and took it as a bad she got the fucking grammy oh that's what he said yeah and he was like take it quieter that's uh yeah it's hard to argue and she did roll out facts like that he's basically saying yo yeah i'm the man i one time had a project in fact the very first script i ever sold um adam sandler's company was producing it happy madison and that then uh you know president uh was this guy jack garaputo and we were having some script uh meeting and he said you got you got to put a monkey in this movie.

[884] And I said, you know, I don't think I'm comfortable putting a monkey in the movie.

[885] And he, he said, we put a monkey in the animal, made $90 million.

[886] And I'm like, all right, I'll put a monkey in the way.

[887] No matter what, what, what, would note he had for me. He had some reference to a movie they had crushed on.

[888] And it's hard to win the argument when they Yeah.

[889] I don't have that.

[890] I don't have that kind of weight.

[891] Yeah.

[892] One thing I'm, I'm always in of because just you were fucking around at the house yesterday.

[893] And I said something about, the Rolling Stones, then you immediately just started playing this Rolling Stone song.

[894] I would love to know scientifically, neurologically, how on earth do you have all those songs in your head immediately?

[895] To me, it would be like having memorized thousands of poems, right?

[896] Yeah, if you love them.

[897] I think that's the same way.

[898] People who quote...

[899] But do you think it's a muscle memory thing?

[900] Do you think it's different than like trying to recall a passage in a book?

[901] Do you think it's more about like your body knows how to move?

[902] Well, I think I started playing this and I started doing that.

[903] And it was, I just liked that.

[904] I liked it when I was a kid.

[905] That was a great time for me to bring this up.

[906] It was like, you remember Mickey Mouse because he had a huge impact on you.

[907] You remember whatever your favorite Disney character.

[908] And like for that, that was like, that kind of, that kind of piano like, especially because it was a prominent piano like and pop music at the time, which was not, which was primarily guitar driven.

[909] And so you nerd out, like, and I think, I think most pianists would agree with me that that like rock, I mean, a lot of pianists don't even get into rock and roll because there's just not as much of a spot.

[910] Like, I think I saw some meme where we were talking about Billy Joel the other day.

[911] I was like, I was like fearful to text you and say like, I forget what song was I wanted you to check out.

[912] I just saw the piano was fucking banging.

[913] Oh, right, right.

[914] Is it, is it going to be lame of me to say like how great this Billy Joel piano thing was?

[915] He's a killer player, man. Right?

[916] Is he great?

[917] Yeah, I think he was one of here.

[918] I think he was kind of one of Harry Connick Jr.'s heroes, actually, growing up.

[919] Because I so often run into this where, like, I'm talking to Kristen, there's some musician I love.

[920] And then she'll just point out gently and kindly that technically that person's quite terrible.

[921] Like, we were, we were, I made you read, there's a very famous great guitar player, Pat Mathini.

[922] He's a jazz, jazz musician.

[923] And he is a virtuoso, and he's also a scholar of music.

[924] And I said, do you, have you ever read his critique of Kenny G?

[925] which is one of the most mind scrambling passages you could ever read.

[926] I implore you to look it up on the internet.

[927] He's so quietly abusive of Kenny G. He is, he goes on a tirade about Kenny G's technique that it's just, I've never heard anyone dressed down that much.

[928] So at any rate, I often like people that I have no idea if they're actually good or bad.

[929] Like I don't know if Kenny G's a good or a bad.

[930] Yeah, I don't get into that though, man. If you like him, he's great.

[931] Right.

[932] I'm only saying that to say, if you had text me back, you know, Billy Joel's actually a really shitty piano player.

[933] I would just have to accept that.

[934] Even though I love it, I would have to accept that he's maybe technically a terrible piano player.

[935] I love, I had this guy come over the other day and he was a refugee from the Hungarian revolution.

[936] Well, don't brag.

[937] I didn't know.

[938] I had a, you would be a name dropping a refugee.

[939] And he was like, put a monkey in this song.

[940] He was like, I made $90 million.

[941] But of the, so it was the Hungarian revolution happened.

[942] I think it was like a six or eight day thing in like 1956 or something like that.

[943] Okay.

[944] He came over here as a kid.

[945] He was just kind of a fascinating dude.

[946] And he was, he was this peanut of a man and he dresses impeccably.

[947] Just like everything just fits in his press so nicely.

[948] I'll never be that.

[949] And he said, I have this, um, I have this melody in my head.

[950] Um, and these lyrics that I wrote, you know, when I was a kid in the 60s he's had this he never wrote it down uh -huh and he's had this melody in his head since like the early 60s instead i'm wondering if you could script it out for me i think he just kind of maybe he wants to have this before he dies oh wow have it have a have a document and i said sure come on over and he came over we worked on the song and um and is he humming you the song he's singing it to me he goes you know it's something like when the flowers bloom i'll wait for you And he's, he's a mediocre singer.

[951] Uh -huh.

[952] And by American, I don't think you should say that a lot of refugee, but it will, you know.

[953] All refugees are mediocre singers.

[954] Check that statistic.

[955] By, you know, by classical, you know, soprano standards or whatever.

[956] Right.

[957] Or by American Idol standards, he's a mediocre singer.

[958] But right.

[959] I love that.

[960] I mean, there could have been nothing better.

[961] It was one of the best things I've done.

[962] Well, Neil Young's not a good singer.

[963] And Bob Dylan's not a good singer.

[964] Yeah.

[965] If that were the compass that they used, yes.

[966] Most people, most of my heroes would not be.

[967] But I do want to, because I think there's a great time to bring this up.

[968] Because the whole reason you were playing the Rolling Stone song was that the first three years that Chris and I were together, I had a longstanding hobby of replacing the word dick and balls, replacing lyrics.

[969] Dick and Balls and tons of popular songs.

[970] And I would sing them all around the house about Dick and Balls, sucking Dick and Balls, whatever it is.

[971] You get super creative with it.

[972] I do.

[973] She hated this about me. She thought it was so immature and stupid.

[974] And then you were visiting one time.

[975] And then we discovered that you too really enjoy replacing lyrics with Dick and Balls or sucking Dick and Balls.

[976] And when she came into the living room and we were deep into singing like a Dick and Ball song, something lifted for her.

[977] She no longer hated that I did that.

[978] And I felt like it was something about my personality.

[979] I was really stifling for her.

[980] And it didn't even feel right about it.

[981] I thought, this is part of me. And then you basically liberated me. He gave me a license to forever then sing songs about Dick and Ball.

[982] I think we get, but does she ever laugh?

[983] But now once, now that she, because you're her musical idol and once you approved, all of a sudden I had license to do it.

[984] So all of a sudden, this is brilliant.

[985] So, yeah.

[986] So you and I will send each other.

[987] their Christmas songs, right?

[988] Right, right.

[989] Well, and that's kind of, honestly, that's what, when do you know somebody's, like, I mean, not to throw Kristen out of the boss, but if she, but if she said, hey, so -and -so's actually not technically a good whatever singer or piano player, is she basing that on her own observation of this person, or is she basing it on a student in music school who told her that, who heard that from a professor who, like, for example, everybody always likes to say that John Williams steals or borrows.

[990] The composer, yeah, the composer, like the greatest film composer who ever lived.

[991] Yeah, yeah, E .T. That's a memorable one.

[992] Yeah.

[993] And, uh, oh, but people say he stole.

[994] He stole from, I think Strauss was his big.

[995] In my mind, I was thought, I love John Williams, you know, but like, there's always that thing, like, you know, does he steal from composers?

[996] And I've never actually, but then it occurred to me, you know, I'm listening to stuff.

[997] I don't know where it came.

[998] As far as I know, this is the most original stuff I've ever heard.

[999] I couldn't tell you one classical composer that he stole from, except for that I heard that in college.

[1000] So how you frame a comment like that, right?

[1001] So one version is he stole.

[1002] A version I could pitch is it's incumbent upon you to pass on these great things to a new generation.

[1003] And the sad thing is this generation is simply not going to go back and watch Fletch.

[1004] they're not going to go back and watch Caddyshack.

[1005] They're not going to watch Smoky and the Bandit.

[1006] So it's almost incumbent upon you to, of course, do your own version, but to reintroduce that.

[1007] Right.

[1008] You know, or it's kind of lost.

[1009] So there's this cyclical nature of all this stuff that I think is beneficial to everyone.

[1010] Back to Dick and Balls.

[1011] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1012] Sorry.

[1013] I haven't gotten off topic.

[1014] No, my wife will laugh at one out of every 10 ,000.

[1015] Dick and Ball's rewrites.

[1016] And I'll do them up and down the hallway all day.

[1017] Less so since my daughter was born.

[1018] But I did.

[1019] But the most recent one she laughed at, and she hadn't laughed.

[1020] And I'm talking one in, you know, one a year.

[1021] Uh -huh.

[1022] Right.

[1023] And it makes it all worth it because she hates it as Kristen does.

[1024] Until, you know, until I encouraged, until I conferred genius status upon it.

[1025] Now Kristen's on board, it sounds like.

[1026] But the one she laughed at the other day, she particularly doesn't like it when I do it to like Disney's kids movies.

[1027] Oh, sure, sure.

[1028] But we were doing Moana.

[1029] And it was something like, with the wind and the sail and the noosa behind me how far I'll go and I think I did well I try to suck your balls but your dick it blinds me and now I know and she couldn't take it man she lied and she said your dick blinds me it blinds me it blinds it could mean so many things which is great about it could be you be alarmingly large it could be pal.

[1030] So how big is your dick, blinding?

[1031] Well, the only one that I've gotten that she seems to tolerate is the very popular Christmas song.

[1032] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[1033] Struck the shaft, work the balls.

[1034] I squeeze my bombs.

[1035] I'll work the shaft, stroke the head, tickle the balls.

[1036] The way I get her in.

[1037] Hang on your dick and balls.

[1038] I'm going to get to know you better.

[1039] Oh, if I could sing like this Christmas.

[1040] If I can work my way into buns, like she does think buns is funny.

[1041] So I try to, try to steer them into like tickle the buns.

[1042] Okay, yeah, that's nice.

[1043] Don't ignore my buns.

[1044] Right.

[1045] So you sent me a voice memo one time of, of silver bells.

[1046] I think it was silver balls.

[1047] It was like, stroke my balls.

[1048] squeeze my balls tickle my bones pinch the head a lot of things to do to a dick and balls I was totally unprepared for that you were I was just when I had you on the hook so the one of the last things I want to talk to you about is and it's going to be very hard for me to navigate this question but I'm only going to take it from my own personal egocentric point of view, if my good friend growing up and I both were super into comedy and then I did not move to L .A. and my friend Aaron Weekly moved and became a highly paid comedian, I would have a very hard time being supportive of that personally and not being jealous or not it would be one way or another it would have a pretty huge impact on me so i'm curious having grown up with christin together she's not better than you musically and she has now become super well compensated for that what what effect does that have on you or has it evolved over the years how's erin weekly doing well what's interesting is so erin weekly my best friend and truthfully still 80 % of my sense of humor 80 % of my comedy is Aaron Weekly it's everything he and I developed from seventh grade till 12th grade he but he never had a desire to do that professionally so it doesn't seem to be an issue for him right um other than it is weird for him that you know we both grew up wanting a doom buggy and i have a twin turbo doom buggy i think that aspect of it is a little weird again i'm just guessing because he's never really voiced anything but if I'm well I mean obviously the more noble place to be would be to be proud of her and nothing but happy for it and my instinct is to say that because that's what I feel like I've always felt but if there is any jealousy it's I've buried it way deep in a place that I'm I find it's best if you ever have any issues of animosity or jealousy it's best to focus them back inside sure sure put them down and hold hold them there and never tell anyone about it.

[1049] Yeah, you're lower GI probably.

[1050] Right, right.

[1051] No, we weren't after the same thing by any means.

[1052] Okay, great.

[1053] So explain that because first, yeah, there's, there's a million different responses to this I might expect, which is her level of public figureness might seem like a death sentence to you.

[1054] So it might not be anything you would want.

[1055] Again, I'm coming from my own egocentric place where I wanted all that stuff.

[1056] You know, I wanted to have, you know, large appeal or broad appeal and then make money from that.

[1057] Right.

[1058] Did you have that desire?

[1059] I mean, the rock star thing, like everybody wants to be.

[1060] It's hard.

[1061] I mean, I wanted to be a rock star to the point where it's hard to buy that that there's anybody that never has that bug.

[1062] Oh, yeah.

[1063] Like even if you're a carpenter.

[1064] Brad Pitt wants to be Mick Jagger.

[1065] If you're a carpenter, you want to be a carpenter on the star.

[1066] Even if you've accomplished a lot, Barack Obama certainly has a musician he wishes he was.

[1067] You did want to be a rock star.

[1068] Yeah, I did want to be a rock star.

[1069] I think I'm jealous of, you know, like I'll hate on, I think Nora Jones, the killer musician, John Mayer is one of my favorite musicians of all time, but I'll hate on them and find and find things I don't like about them and find inadequacies in their playing and their songwriting and stuff like that.

[1070] And it's because I'm fucking jealous of them.

[1071] Yeah.

[1072] And that's why.

[1073] I can super relate.

[1074] consciously, I don't think about it that much, but I know that that's what's there.

[1075] And I don't think I feel that with Kristen as far as if I feel any inadequacies about, you know, my success or lack there of.

[1076] It's more like I blame myself and I'm not mad at people around me who've gotten there.

[1077] But I want to be clear, like, you are a successful musician.

[1078] You support your family playing music, which is a humongous win.

[1079] So I'm not in any way saying you haven't succeeded.

[1080] I'm just saying that, um, you know, Kristen has succeeded on this, you know, pretty unrealistic.

[1081] Right.

[1082] Right.

[1083] Yeah.

[1084] So it's, no, some of that still exists somewhere.

[1085] I'm so scared to ask you this, but it's something I wonder.

[1086] No, no, I think it's terrific.

[1087] Yeah.

[1088] Um, you've asked me some questions.

[1089] I asked you the other night point blank where you molested.

[1090] Which kind of, it took you off guard.

[1091] Yeah, you've asked me some things.

[1092] I was like, wow.

[1093] And then I realized sometimes it's not that you don't want to talk about things.

[1094] Just you've never been asked.

[1095] Because no. No one in their right mind would ever ask you.

[1096] If you've been molested point blank.

[1097] But I still don't remember.

[1098] You ever put your mom's underwear on as a kid?

[1099] Yeah.

[1100] No, it's not uncomfortable for me to answer at all.

[1101] In fact, it's cool to have a conversation with that.

[1102] Because, I mean, I go through different things as far as like being able to deal with Kristen's celebrity and your celebrity and stuff like that.

[1103] And you both have two totally different ways of making people comfortable with it.

[1104] Um, but a lot of it just depends on me and what my mindset is.

[1105] And, um, but also I'm here doing a podcast with you, which is great.

[1106] And that's because I'm friends with Kristen.

[1107] That's, I mean, that's, that's awesome.

[1108] And also, I look at things like, I think about it sometimes.

[1109] Um, and I don't know if I, you know, you start to have different definitions of success.

[1110] And is that because you have different definitions of success or is it because you're justifying it.

[1111] You know, and it's probably a little bit of both.

[1112] But I do remember there was a place we were playing.

[1113] I was out on tour of the songwriter, and it was up in the mountains, California, this venue.

[1114] And it's in this old loggers town.

[1115] And I was playing there.

[1116] And I, and I, we had just, I think we were either on our way to L .A. where I was going to see you guys, or we had just left.

[1117] I can't really remember.

[1118] But I was playing at this, at this venue.

[1119] And I was thinking, and for some reason, Kristen, like, she entered my mind.

[1120] And I thought, she would probably never play this venue and never get a chance to play this venue.

[1121] And I was, and I think it's because I was in love with this place.

[1122] And I was like, this is like a romantic kind of vibe.

[1123] And the audience was, you know, 50 people or something like that.

[1124] And it was in this tiny little place.

[1125] I'd never seen something so thoughtfully decorated.

[1126] I don't even get into that.

[1127] But I was like, wow.

[1128] Just everything about this place is, it's an amazing night.

[1129] And I hate saying this because Kristen's not competing with me. Right.

[1130] Nor am I consciously competing with her most of the time.

[1131] But now and then if I ever, like I had this.

[1132] So I'm, I'm ashamed to say it, but I had this moment where it was like, I was justifying that celebrity to myself.

[1133] And I was saying, you have something.

[1134] Kristen would never, Kristen would never get to come in here and play this gig and remain in relative obscurity.

[1135] Yeah.

[1136] And, and get to have the exact same experience I have.

[1137] So, so I, and there, I'm sure there's.

[1138] I think that's a super normal thought to have.

[1139] I don't think there's anything negative about that.

[1140] But the fact that I would think something like that is indicative that maybe.

[1141] there is some jealousy there.

[1142] I don't know.

[1143] It's something like that.

[1144] So yeah.

[1145] And I guess my curiosity is more like first and foremost, uh, you're not in a cubicle, uh, 40 hours a week wishing you could play music professionally.

[1146] So you're already like whatever the spectrum is, right?

[1147] You're already in the 75th percentile because you're doing the thing you love to do for a living.

[1148] Right.

[1149] So that's, that's, that's, goes without saying.

[1150] But I do wonder if you ever play the game with yourself where you're like, fuck, if I had moved to New York, like she did at 18, would I have been on a similar trajectory?

[1151] But I didn't.

[1152] You didn't, right.

[1153] But do you ever play that game with yourself?

[1154] I think I'm at a spot where I say I didn't.

[1155] I think I did used to play that game.

[1156] Well, certainly it's evolved.

[1157] You're 38?

[1158] Yeah.

[1159] And you have a kid that you love and you have your wife, Izzy who you love.

[1160] So you have a great fucking life.

[1161] So, yeah, it would be very unbecoming of you to be sitting around going like, fuck, how did I end up here because you ended up somewhere?

[1162] Great.

[1163] But I only, I do wonder if when you were a little bit younger, were you, did you ever think like, fuck?

[1164] Well, the only thing, the only thing difference between her and I, because there wasn't a skill level difference was that she moved in New York.

[1165] No. No, I don't think so.

[1166] Okay.

[1167] No, I don't think, I don't think about it that much.

[1168] Okay.

[1169] I think, I think, I think, I think, I think about it.

[1170] Okay.

[1171] Or maybe I just don't think about it in that way.

[1172] I don't know.

[1173] But the, the, the, the, the, the smaller person in me right now as far in in regards to the celebrity and feelings of inadequacy and stuff is flattered that you even think about me that much i do think about you a lot and um you know and your amazing life versus my shitty life that is not at all what i think because i don't think the things about our life that are awesome have anything to do with those elements that are us being famous us being famous is like you know five percent of why our life's great in my opinion for sure but it is five percent yeah and that's great because i because i kind of had like because I have had a little bit of a breakthrough 10 years ago and I started realizing that I wanted that it was okay to want some professional success because for a long time I felt if I'm playing good music, I don't care where I am.

[1174] And that's so idealistic.

[1175] And I did believe that for a long time.

[1176] And I still believe that.

[1177] When it works, there's nothing better.

[1178] Kristen, who basically moved New York, had to drop out because she went straight to Broadway.

[1179] I was in L .A. for 10 years auditioning and making zero money.

[1180] and was pretty certain that is how the whole experiment was going to finish and end.

[1181] And for me, it was I had a show every Sunday at the groundlings.

[1182] And around Thursday or Friday, I'm talking to my friends in Michigan who went another way and have speedboats and houses and kids.

[1183] And I'm like, I fucking blew it.

[1184] But then I would have that show on Sunday and it would be all this fuel.

[1185] And I go, nope, it doesn't really matter for me. It doesn't matter if I never leave this one bedroom apartment in Santa Monica.

[1186] That show for me fills up the well so much.

[1187] that it's it doesn't matter.

[1188] John Mayer wrote in a song, but he said there's a, there's a line and I think maybe off his new record where he says, you got a family, but I got my dream.

[1189] Uh -huh.

[1190] And he's talking to some girl from his past or something like that.

[1191] And that's cool.

[1192] And I thought it was arrogant all at the same time.

[1193] Sure, sure.

[1194] And any of these topics are so dicey to.

[1195] But he's at a point where he can realize that.

[1196] And so I said, and like, I don't talk to Kristen about it too often, but I did ask her yesterday.

[1197] I was like, was there a point where you're like, I made it, whatever, which is almost an insensitive question away because it kind of like denies that she's way more multifaceted than that than, you know, there's more going on in her life.

[1198] Yeah.

[1199] But she didn't think there was really a moment.

[1200] And she thinks that's more fan -imposed stuff.

[1201] Because I said, you know, I said, you know, the Beatles on the Ed Sullivan show, you know, that was the definitive moment and so many stars.

[1202] And she said, She said, I think that's more a status that's conferred on Star's bite.

[1203] Well, and her in particular, she has an oddly healthy perspective on all of it.

[1204] I don't know where that came from or why she's that way.

[1205] But, you know, the thing you're circling is this thing that I, so you've watched American Idol, and we've watched a bunch of seasons, American Idol.

[1206] And the thing I've always been really jealous of is that those kids, when they have the coming home week, when they whittle it down to whatever it is, like four or five of them or something.

[1207] and then they go back to their hometown and often they get they get in a parade on a convertible and they sit in the back of this convertible and the whole town's cheering for them and they cry oh i've seen this like a dozen times on american idol and they like they can take it in they absorb it and then they start crying and they feel the feeling of oh my god i did it and i have every time we see that i say to christen i'm like i've never had that sensation i still feel like the guy trying to get somewhere it's just my nature, I think.

[1208] And I've never thought, oh, I did it.

[1209] I made it.

[1210] I never had that feeling.

[1211] You think those kids really felt that way, though?

[1212] I mean, either that or they're like great on demand fake criers, but they are bawling with this like adoration.

[1213] And for me, and I've said this in the past, the way I take it all is is really dictated on what my own self -esteem is that day.

[1214] So people in the airport will stop me all the time and they'll say like, oh, I love doing this.

[1215] And And then the majority of the time, I say to myself, oh, they simply recognize me and what the fuck else are you supposed to say to me other than that you liked it.

[1216] They probably hated it, but you can't do that.

[1217] Right.

[1218] So this person probably hates me, but they, but they would love it.

[1219] You would love it if somebody was that.

[1220] Yeah, I probably would.

[1221] Yeah, yeah.

[1222] It'd be exciting to see how I navigated that.

[1223] We had a, we had a, we had, like you and Monica have, um, a lot of interesting talks about race and, and, and she's, she's sensitive.

[1224] And I, who knows where.

[1225] the center is and where the truth is, but I think, you know, she's certainly more sensitive than you.

[1226] And she has a right to be.

[1227] She's Indian.

[1228] Right.

[1229] Yeah.

[1230] And I, and I, and I, I, I think that I don't, I don't, I don't want to say that you're insensitive, but I said, I talked to yesterday and I said, and most people would be, you know, whatever we're talking about, whatever is potentially offensive.

[1231] Yeah.

[1232] And I think that's going to become a thing.

[1233] Like, I don't think the, I, I, you, like, you are not offended by things and, and, um, So, although alternately, I'm super sensitive, like on Twitter.

[1234] If you, if you say that, like, I looked ugly on something, it really hurts my feeling.

[1235] Oh, really?

[1236] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1237] It definitely triggers all my.

[1238] Because I think I'm going to think about that often now.

[1239] Like, if would, like, if there's, if there's a racial conflict that I'm thinking about and, you know, is this offensive?

[1240] You plug me into it.

[1241] I'm like, Monica's rolling her eyes.

[1242] I'm so sorry.

[1243] Before Monica's mic has been, um, um, uh, confiscated by the.

[1244] the amplifier and it's just not fair it's bad timing back to Kristen she she um she uh weirdly I don't think ever was striving for attention so much you know what I'm saying like I think she genuinely loves singing she genuinely loves acting and she wasn't filling some whole I certainly was craving that attention wanting that attention and then shortly after getting it going oh this isn't what I thought it was let's talk about something you and you and Kristen both loved and bonded over so much and I want to set you up to play a song.

[1245] You guys were both very huge Martin Sexton fans.

[1246] Still, I'm sure.

[1247] Yeah, we'd go see him around the country.

[1248] Right.

[1249] You were basically parrot or parrot heads, dead heads, fish people for Martin Sex heads.

[1250] Sex heads.

[1251] And I have a favorite song of his and it's escaping me right now.

[1252] You like candy.

[1253] Yes, I love candy.

[1254] Thank you.

[1255] It's like asking a guy with a cold to sing.

[1256] like Stevie Wonder Oh really Oh I kind of thought a cold Would lend itself Maybe who knows man All right I don't know if I remember this song You do A little jail babe Tell me a story Let me burn a smoke We can share a word Want to hear it talk straight So let me hear a story Before you get off And make a change Talking about a woman who just can't say no she needs another lover like she needs another dose in her blood talking about a woman or no candy she's shaking on a back street line lost angel that long for this world good emotional don't use this show my vein she says only when i speak and when i'm making track.

[1257] Sweatin's just my mean way.

[1258] Show me where I am.

[1259] Can you tell me where I need to be?

[1260] Those eyes, and she wore her disguise.

[1261] I'd see through it.

[1262] It's hey coming from the rain girl.

[1263] The rain girl.

[1264] Woman she loves me like a dog loves a bone.

[1265] I just can't.

[1266] Another love a life.

[1267] Talking about a woman to know.

[1268] Can there.

[1269] She's shaking on a back street line, yeah.

[1270] Oh, loose cannon, ashamed to explode.

[1271] When am I gonna learn to let you go?

[1272] You're my candy.

[1273] Lost Angel.

[1274] That long for this world.

[1275] God.

[1276] Damn, I know, it's fucking infuriating how talented you are.

[1277] Oh, get out.

[1278] Get out.

[1279] I mean, it really is.

[1280] I'm so, I don't know that I'm, I, I, it's, you want to talk about jealous.

[1281] If we know anyone in our circle, who I'm madly jealous of, I would fucking kill to be able to open my mouth and let that come out of my being.

[1282] It's so intoxicating.

[1283] It's such a superpower.

[1284] I'm so into it.

[1285] Thanks, man. Oh, yeah.

[1286] So yesterday you created a song with the help of my three -year -old Delta.

[1287] She created a song with the help of me. All right, because it's so modest of you to defer.

[1288] Yeah, so what happened?

[1289] She said, oops, I farted.

[1290] Right.

[1291] And that was kind of the, yeah.

[1292] Like her old man. Who doesn't, man?

[1293] That was kind of like it was sparked something.

[1294] In the room.

[1295] I felt like the molecules in the room chain that was like, it was, that song wrote itself.

[1296] We were just, I thought like, I felt like Delta and I were just the vessel through which that song came.

[1297] It was already written.

[1298] It's been written for a hundred years.

[1299] years.

[1300] Okay, here it goes.

[1301] It's been written for a hundred years.

[1302] It's a nice round number.

[1303] Oopsies, oopsies, oopsie, oopsies, oopsie, oopsies, oopsies, oopsie, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsie, I farted, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsie.

[1304] I farted.

[1305] Oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsie, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, oopsies, I farted, and I farted, I farted.

[1306] I got it, I mean, it could be a hit fucking song.

[1307] Yeah, that happened, as Monica's saying, in 10 seconds.

[1308] and I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna steer my boat into the saccharin territory.

[1309] But I do wanna, I want to, I want to be sincere in this, uh, I have never witnessed anything like when you're in our living room and my girls are singing with you, in the way that you can incorporate the whole environment and turn it into this experience.

[1310] It's, I just am so grateful for it.

[1311] I'm so glad you're in our life and that and you've, Every time you're here, we join the Bob train.

[1312] This musical bubble you live in and you invite us into it.

[1313] And it is, it's such a great gift.

[1314] I'm sorry for everyone who doesn't have a Bob Murvac in their life.

[1315] And I think people like Bill Gates should hire you for a billion dollars to just come in and weave the fabric of their family into this surreal experience.

[1316] Yeah.

[1317] So if you're listening, I'm sure Bill Gates is listening.

[1318] Right.

[1319] Oh, one more thing.

[1320] Monica.

[1321] Oh, I should have started by saying the armchair expert theme song.

[1322] A little chair expert.

[1323] Oh, God.

[1324] And I never tire of it.

[1325] I get sick of my own voice, but fuck, that song could play 24 -7 for me. I should mention the guys who recorded that.

[1326] It was Takashi E .O. on bass and Rick Beeman on drums.

[1327] Keith Kaminsky and Mark Byerley on tenor sax and trumpet, respectively.

[1328] And Brian Riley, who engineered that session.

[1329] And they were just, they were killer.

[1330] I still don't think I pay Keith for the gig.

[1331] I need to pay him this weekend or something like that.

[1332] Just take something from our house while you're there.

[1333] So you deem to have some value and then just bestow it on to him.

[1334] But that theme song is the perfect example of your and I's working relationship, which is occasionally in a movie when you cast somebody, you have this idea and then they just fucking blow whatever idea you had out of your.

[1335] For me and Chips, Adam Brody, was like his role was almost a placeholder of a guy to give information just every time he acted.

[1336] I was like, holy shit, thank you for making this, this incredible thing.

[1337] It's so fun.

[1338] So, yeah, you know, I give you a very, I can't even remember the stupid broad strokes I was saying to you like, sincere yet fun, blah, blah, blah, and then you come back with this and it just makes me so happy.

[1339] Well, I think we're like -minded too, and I'm really glad because I don't think everybody would have dug that.

[1340] No, I'm a Bob Mervak fan.

[1341] I liked every version, and then this one would just have to be the best.

[1342] And that was awesome what you said about the living room.

[1343] That makes it feel like a family.

[1344] and that's really cool and um and uh don't die okay okay okay and i do think i have a thing with christin it's since she was i we've always played music together and it's just like when we get into something but i do think i have an effect on her and she's most definitely got an effect oh when you guys get together it is definitely like the shell silverstein missing piece thing like you guys click into this shared identity which again is very much what aaron weakly and i had which She was like, we were one person.

[1345] And she's so confident around you.

[1346] She, I can see her love music 10 times more when you're around.

[1347] That's awesome.

[1348] Yeah.

[1349] So why don't you take us off with, out with whatever your favorite song is to play?

[1350] My favorite song to play.

[1351] I know, that's a lot of pressure.

[1352] Oh, something like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1353] That would be great.

[1354] Can we afford that?

[1355] Yeah.

[1356] I think so.

[1357] Okay.

[1358] Call ass cap.

[1359] Look at Monica's crushing, by the way.

[1360] she just reminded us about oh farting she reminded us that you wrote the theme song and now she's reminding me to be a good host and have you play your own song without monica we would be adrift at sea thank you this is actually appropriate this is the this is the first song i ever wrote and um this was about a girl who broke my heart and uh this was this was this was the girl who i started dating in high school um when christin went out of town had she never take a trip who knows we wouldn't have this song we wouldn't have this song it's great to know the origin stories of iconic I'm going to thank her when I walk in the door I don't know if I'll write a melody that'll make you cry but if the truth's gonna ever come out then I just might I just mind well I know words can get in the way Lord knows I've said too much But if there's something I can do That's gonna make you stay One more night I just might But you know You know I changed my tune In the third movement But sometimes I can't tell How it's gonna hurt When there's no room for improvement You're gone Just the same I hope you're doing well I hope you're doing well You and I will never be Anything Anymore in the eye Well I don't know where to go And I don't know what to do But to sit here I just can't help thinking that the next chance Is gonna be the one Or that if I I change my life You'll come running along Or that one day we'll both be crying At the same song And you'll hear my voice But for now All I can say is I hope you're doing well I hope you're doing well And I hope you're angels Shining bright And I hope you're Well you know my smile's hurt for so long But I think I'm coming round There's something real I took a deep breath and thought of you in Crying until I just now this is how I feel I hope you're doing well I hope you're doing well you know side note to have a fucking outlet when you're young and you have a heartbreak the fact that you can you can use that to create something like your average you know 18 year old they have a bar that's what they do you go to the bar with all those feelings and you maybe turn that into a fist fighter or underage peel out leaving the party Well, and driving, apparently.

[1361] That's what I advocate for.

[1362] Yeah, that was an honest one.

[1363] That was, I remember that was an honest one at the time.

[1364] Yeah, yeah.

[1365] That was my, that was my gateway into songwriting.

[1366] It was, you know, a real one.

[1367] I've always dug the real songs.

[1368] You know, my father -in -law, bust my balls about being too emotional.

[1369] Yeah.

[1370] He's like, oh, my feelings.

[1371] My feelings.

[1372] Bob, thanks for coming and sharing your superpower with us.

[1373] Tickled me. I love you.

[1374] I love you.

[1375] Good night.

[1376] Stay tuned if you'd like to hear my good friend and producer Monica Padman point out the many errors in the podcast.

[1377] Monica Padman, Bob Murvac was just on and I bet it was hard for you to even fact check because when we left that conversation, you said to me, what did you say about Bob?

[1378] I said he's the most talented person I've ever met in real life.

[1379] Yeah, and that just made me so happy because I feel the same way about Bob.

[1380] And I mentioned it during the podcast, but again, he was very, very sick.

[1381] So his voice normally is even five times better.

[1382] He's a phenom and we love him.

[1383] What did he say that we can embarrass him with now?

[1384] Very quick.

[1385] Oh, is it a quick one?

[1386] Very quick fact check.

[1387] So Kristen was on the homecoming court.

[1388] Oh.

[1389] We were a little dicey on whether or not she was on the homecoming court.

[1390] And I clarified and she was.

[1391] She did not win.

[1392] Okay, good.

[1393] She doesn't deserve to win.

[1394] But did you, where did you find this?

[1395] You didn't ask her.

[1396] I asked her.

[1397] Oh, that's, that's, listen.

[1398] And I say this would love.

[1399] I would step in front of a thousand trains for her.

[1400] The mother of my children, she's perfect.

[1401] Her memory is useless.

[1402] So I wish you would have, like, consulted her yearbook or something.

[1403] Well, listen.

[1404] Well, she went to that phony baloney high school, though they probably didn't even have a year one.

[1405] No, this is what happened.

[1406] When Bob was talking about it, I said, wait, wasn't she on the homecoming court?

[1407] Because I remember seeing pictures.

[1408] Oh, okay.

[1409] From my perfect memory.

[1410] Uh -huh, right.

[1411] And then I decided to just corroborate.

[1412] And so I double -checked with her.

[1413] And she said the same.

[1414] And you're right.

[1415] If she is, she's not.

[1416] It's about a 50 -50 shot.

[1417] She's not all that reliable in her memory.

[1418] But - In so many other ways.

[1419] Again, America, I just love her.

[1420] She's so nice.

[1421] We know.

[1422] You love her.

[1423] Yeah.

[1424] I love her too.

[1425] But her memories for the fucking birds.

[1426] They really, I mean, where it really hits home is just the idea that she's forgotten about full vacations we've taken.

[1427] You know, that's a little, that's a little rough to stomach initially.

[1428] I mean, was it a bad vacation?

[1429] No, that's what makes it sad is it was like a very nice, memorable, fun vacation that you'd hope to reflect on on a porch, on a farm when you're retired.

[1430] That'll just be me explaining to her where we went and she'll have to rely on me for me to go, you were really happy.

[1431] Like, you loved this vacation.

[1432] Yeah, I hope she remembers our previous vacation from this year.

[1433] Again, yes, exactly.

[1434] So we all went on a vacation, lover's retreat.

[1435] We did.

[1436] The two children, Monica Bell and I, we went to beaches and Turks and Kekos.

[1437] It was awesome.

[1438] How sad will you be when in five months you go, oh, wasn't it fun?

[1439] We were watching Piki Blind and she's like.

[1440] And we had couples massages.

[1441] Yeah, you and her had couples massages.

[1442] That she won't remember any of that.

[1443] Isn't that a little bit heartbreaking?

[1444] Yeah, but I have the memory for all three of us.

[1445] Yeah, and ultimately, it really is only about your memory.

[1446] What the fuck do you care if someone else?

[1447] Yeah, who cares?

[1448] Exactly.

[1449] But she was on the homecoming court.

[1450] The Harry Connick Jr. song that Kristen Love and Bob played a lot in high school is called Booker.

[1451] Oh, okay.

[1452] People want to go check that song out.

[1453] I wish legally we could just play it right now because it would be promoting him, but we can't do that.

[1454] We'd owe someone money.

[1455] But you can look it up on iTunes.

[1456] It's an impressive display of pianic ability, not a word, but should be.

[1457] Anac prowess.

[1458] Sure.

[1459] And then when Kristen was on that show, Harry Connick Jr. played that for her in person.

[1460] What a brat.

[1461] She probably won't remember that in a couple.

[1462] No, she'll always remember that because it's music.

[1463] Yeah.

[1464] Anything music related, she's, it's there.

[1465] Bob mentioned that Ryan Gosling has some music projects on the side when you guys were talking about La La Land.

[1466] And he had said, oh, it's something, bones or something.

[1467] And Ryan Gosling is one half of a rock duo called Dead Man's Bones.

[1468] Oh, okay.

[1469] With his friend, Zach Shields.

[1470] Is he dead, Zach?

[1471] No. Oh, maybe it's a ghost in him.

[1472] Okay.

[1473] And they've had one album released in 2009 called Dead Man's Bones.

[1474] Did you listen to it?

[1475] No. Oh.

[1476] I wish you would have.

[1477] I will.

[1478] It would be hard for me to like it.

[1479] You know another actor who had a musical project that few people know about?

[1480] is Robert Downey, before Iron Man, had an album that I loved.

[1481] Oh, my God, did I love it?

[1482] You know, I had those reoccurring dreams about him and everything.

[1483] So I probably fed into it, but he is a fucking awesome voice.

[1484] Have you ever heard him sing with Sting?

[1485] No. Oh, my God, he sings with Sting.

[1486] It's outrageous.

[1487] What's the genre?

[1488] Of his music?

[1489] Yeah.

[1490] It's interesting.

[1491] It's hard to kind of pinpoint, and that's probably why it wasn't gigantically successful.

[1492] He had, one of his songs was on the kiss kiss, kiss bang, bang, uh, soundtrack.

[1493] Um, but it, it's kind of jazz, you know, it's a little bit jazz, um, this is a negative word to use with it, but a little new agey, jazzy, uh, feel.

[1494] But it's tremendous.

[1495] But anyways, what I was going to say about Ryan Gosling, because I'm jealous of him.

[1496] I'm not jealous of Robert Donnie Jr. I look up to him and worship him, like a deity.

[1497] Um, but Ryan Gosling, I'm jealous of.

[1498] Okay.

[1499] Can you clarify the difference?

[1500] Why?

[1501] Well, I think one's much older than me, you know, and one's younger than me, so it's threatening.

[1502] Like, I look at Downey as an elder statesman in my life.

[1503] Like, I was a kid when I saw him and, uh, and you couldn't have been in things he was in.

[1504] Could have never been in them.

[1505] Um, he's of a different era.

[1506] I, you know, even though we're, we're only like, I don't know, nine years apart or something, but, but he, when he was in a weird science, he was in the tiniest role.

[1507] and I was just fucking straight target lock on him.

[1508] So drawn to him.

[1509] I just love him.

[1510] And Ryan Gosling's more like, I'm already working.

[1511] Now this guy comes out of nowhere.

[1512] He's fucking great.

[1513] He's better than me. He is so good looking.

[1514] I've talked about this.

[1515] This stupid identity I carved out for myself where I thought I was a macho because I rode motorcycles and stuff.

[1516] This guy, by my estimation, He came out of like Disney.

[1517] I think he was on the Mickey Mouse Club.

[1518] He was on Mickey Mouse Club.

[1519] So like my worst nightmare would be guys would find out I was on the Mickey Mouse Club show, right?

[1520] From the identity, I was trying to carve out as someone who fought a lot and rode motorcycles.

[1521] And here's a guy that proves that you're way more appealing by just being a nice source of bright light.

[1522] This is what we were just talking about.

[1523] You realized that.

[1524] We were just talking about on another fact check.

[1525] Okay.

[1526] About Acapella groups.

[1527] Okay.

[1528] Okay.

[1529] Don't, don't, don't use this against me. Should I read all the Acapellocryms from?

[1530] No, no. We've said enough about the product.

[1531] Yeah.

[1532] So for a guy to take a completely opposite approach as you've taken in life and then yield all these amazing results.

[1533] Of course, I'm just jealous of him.

[1534] Yeah, of course.

[1535] And then I'm going to go even, I'm going to really deep dive this.

[1536] What scares me is someone will hear this and they'll only report one part of this sentence to him.

[1537] And he'll think I was bad mouthing him, which I'm not.

[1538] Because I'm in awe of his talent.

[1539] Yeah, he's perfect.

[1540] But the other, so I thought he was so brilliant in half Nelson.

[1541] If you've never seen that movie, I mean, what a performance.

[1542] It blew my mind.

[1543] I'm like, this guy is it.

[1544] Then I saw him in a couple movies where I thought he was just too busy, too flashy, too big of a crazy jacket, crazy hair, too many tattoos, right?

[1545] Okay.

[1546] Things that might not have been his decision.

[1547] No, I think they're definitely driven by him.

[1548] Because I've been in those situations you're talking to the director.

[1549] Oh, I think it'd be cool if he had this, this and this.

[1550] And certainly I think he made a lot of these choices.

[1551] But then if I'm super honest about that, it's because I've done some stupid shit in my career where I was just trying to get a ton of attention.

[1552] And so I'm naturally assuming he, I'm projecting that he too is a bottomless pit of approval.

[1553] And then so I'm hard on him for making similar dumb choices I've made.

[1554] We really just do that all the time.

[1555] We just see the things in other people that we hate about ourselves.

[1556] Yeah.

[1557] And then the list.

[1558] for me is long.

[1559] That's why I'm so many people I could make the same speech about, you know, I'm just jealous of them.

[1560] But anyway, so all that in summation was his music would have to be really fucking great for me to concede that it was great because I'm jealous of him.

[1561] Downey probably could have been half good and I would have loved it.

[1562] Here this kid would have to be extra good for me to like it because he's so gifted and gorgeous.

[1563] Yeah.

[1564] Okay, Bob said that George Clooney He likes to put jazz music in his movies.

[1565] Okay.

[1566] And he mentioned good night and good luck, but couldn't remember the other one.

[1567] And he does have jazz songs in both of the movies he's directed before I'd have March, the one that Bob was in.

[1568] Confessions of a dangerous mind and leatherheads.

[1569] They both have jazz music.

[1570] Even leather hats.

[1571] Yeah.

[1572] I didn't see it, but it didn't seem like a jazzy type movie.

[1573] Yeah, but it was set in.

[1574] It was period.

[1575] Yeah, it was a period piece.

[1576] All I can remember from the trailer is Krasinski wearing a leather helmet.

[1577] Yeah.

[1578] That's about it.

[1579] I had a movie poster of that in my room.

[1580] Get out of here.

[1581] Of course I did.

[1582] Oh, my God.

[1583] Let's go over your crushes really quick.

[1584] You're number one, two, and three crushes.

[1585] But Matt Damon and Ben Affleck.

[1586] Number one.

[1587] They're tied for number one.

[1588] Tied for number one for life.

[1589] Yeah.

[1590] And your goggles for them, it's just the best.

[1591] It's so, no, it doesn't matter what they do.

[1592] It does matter.

[1593] They do the right thing.

[1594] Always.

[1595] Okay, there you go.

[1596] That's right.

[1597] I enjoy them.

[1598] Yeah.

[1599] Even if one of them was like, showed up on a red carpet, very, very, very puking.

[1600] They just pulled them out of a river.

[1601] You'd be like, look at that.

[1602] That's how you do a red carpet.

[1603] Sorry, we're distrapped.

[1604] We really are.

[1605] We got really uptracked.

[1606] Anyway, I had a movie poster and they were wearing helmets.

[1607] Leather helmets.

[1608] Leatherheads.

[1609] Bob is talking about this person he had over who was a part of the Hungarian Revolution and he said it was a six or eight day thing in 1956 and he was half right about that which I find that's good pretty pretty good you meet 30 % right you're crushing great the Hungarian revolution was in 1956 but it lasted from October 23rd to November 10th so it was a bit longer than 17 days or 18 days um yeah you like how quickly I do mad yeah but then it makes me You feel nervous because then I feel like, oh, I got to check it.

[1610] And I can't check it that quickly.

[1611] You said 23rd, right?

[1612] So seven days to 30.

[1613] Now we're into a new month plus 10.

[1614] Yeah, but October has 31 days.

[1615] Yeah, that's why I said 17 or 18 because I don't know how many days are in October.

[1616] But I know it's going to be 30 or 31 because it's not February.

[1617] Yeah.

[1618] Great.

[1619] Great.

[1620] Well, so no wonder he said eight because it was 18.

[1621] So he had the eight.

[1622] Yeah, he said six or eight.

[1623] He said six or eight.

[1624] So, yeah, I'm going to give it to him still.

[1625] And that was a nationwide revolt against the government of the Hungarian's people republic and its Soviet imposed policies.

[1626] Revolution.

[1627] Yeah, that whole block over there was real busy with Soviet stuff and communists and Cold War.

[1628] What else we got?

[1629] Okay, last one.

[1630] Okay.

[1631] It's a soft fact.

[1632] Okay.

[1633] You said the new generation is not going to go back and watch like old classics, like Fletch, Caddyshack and Smoky and the Bandit.

[1634] Yeah.

[1635] And I don't know that that's true.

[1636] I think there are classics that people still see young people.

[1637] I will be very honest and say I haven't seen any of those three movies.

[1638] And let me just put a qualifier on there.

[1639] You're a fucking comedian.

[1640] Yeah.

[1641] Yeah.

[1642] So if you haven't seen them, how on earth someone who's not obsessed with comedy is going to go see this?

[1643] I know, but I have a big, big, big.

[1644] Crush on that.

[1645] Amen.

[1646] I spent my whole, every minute I had watching Goodwell hunting on repeat.

[1647] So I didn't have much time to watch Fletch cat and Caddyshack.

[1648] Right, right.

[1649] So I'm a weird case.

[1650] You know, so we're studying a lot.

[1651] You got perfect grades.

[1652] I was studying some.

[1653] Some people are lazier.

[1654] Well, now that makes me mad at you.

[1655] I can accept that you got a 4 .0 if I knew you worked hard.

[1656] But if you just tell me you phoned it in and got a 4.

[1657] Then I'm going to naturally hate you just like, what's his name?

[1658] Just like Ryan Gossil?

[1659] Right.

[1660] Yes.

[1661] I'm going to put you in my Rosling guy.

[1662] And if you ever have a fucking.

[1663] It had better be as good as the Rolling Stones for me to just think it's as good as Ario Speedwagon.

[1664] First of all, I'm very happy to be included in any category that Ryan Gossling is a product.

[1665] So I feel good about that.

[1666] Second, I did not get a 4 .0 in high school.

[1667] You got a 3 .99.

[1668] No, I got something in high school that I don't remember, but was high, but was not a 4 .0.

[1669] Okay, but in college, 4 .0.

[1670] I got 1B plus 89 .9.

[1671] I was high.

[1672] I was in the 3 -7 range, I think.

[1673] Whatever Magna Cum Laude was.

[1674] I don't even say the word right, but I got it.

[1675] How do you say it?

[1676] Magna Cum laude.

[1677] Right.

[1678] Say the Laude part.

[1679] That's a weird word.

[1680] I say that.

[1681] They should give that award to anyone who can pronounce it correctly.

[1682] That's it for Bob Murbach?

[1683] Yeah.

[1684] Sorry that we took up most of Bob's time with Brian Gosling musings and Robert Downey Jr. musings, but such is the way of this river.

[1685] I don't apologize for the amount of time we took up talking about Ben and Matt.

[1686] No, we need to do a whole standalone episode about the many ways you've demonstrated your obsession for them.

[1687] And, yeah, I'm split, by the way.

[1688] Half of me wants to cash in all my cultural capital and get them to have dinner with you for your birthday because it would make your dreams come true.

[1689] But then the other half of me is like, they're just real people.

[1690] So you're going to probably be bummed.

[1691] But look.

[1692] Like my obsession with Natalie Portman, there's just no way that she could have delivered my obsession with her.

[1693] Yeah.

[1694] And we've also discussed that I don't find famous people interesting anymore.

[1695] Okay.

[1696] By their fame.

[1697] Uh -huh.

[1698] Okay.

[1699] But I still am in love with them.

[1700] You're not giving that as much credit as you should.

[1701] Look, I only suggest that may happen because I've been there myself.

[1702] I would have, I would have, in my senior year of high school, I would have cut off some of my toes or fingers to go on a date with Nev Campbell.

[1703] I mean, I used to watch Party of Five and my heart hurt so bad for her.

[1704] It was like painful for me to watch that show.

[1705] I loved her so much.

[1706] And then I met her and she's very, she's pretty and nice.

[1707] She's wonderful, but she's not the character.

[1708] on the show.

[1709] I know.

[1710] They can't live up.

[1711] And those guys are not in goodwill hunting.

[1712] I mean, he's, Matt Damon, as smart as he is, he is not that smart.

[1713] He's not as Will hunting.

[1714] Oh, oh, yeah.

[1715] He's not, he's not a bona fide genius probably.

[1716] But he's very smart because I've watched so many YouTube videos.

[1717] I can't even, I can't even tell you.

[1718] Before there was YouTube, I would did he go to Harvard?

[1719] Yeah.

[1720] Oh, you went to Harvard.

[1721] Yeah, he's smart.

[1722] Well, that's cool.

[1723] And the only important moment to have it, too.

[1724] I know.

[1725] Yeah.

[1726] All right.

[1727] Go to have it.

[1728] Goodbye.

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