#1731 - Theo Von

[0] Joe Rogan podcast checking out The Joe Rogan Experience Train by day Joe Rogan podcast by night All day Yeha, Bill Vaugh Yeha Amen man Good to see you my friend Gang baby Good to see you too It's been a while Dude I haven't seen you in a fucking year I know it's been a while Crazy Yeah I almost saw you at the Well thanks for the tickets To the fight Oh anytime man Any time man Let me know That was a wild one Yeah it's different being in the crowd because you can't hear what the announcers are saying yeah they used to have a thing that you could get at the concession stand that was like a little radio and it allowed you to tune into the commentary so if something happened or someone got injured or something like you could you could hear it oh wow yeah they used to sell that i don't know why they don't do that anymore they need to go back to doing that yeah because you're just kind of asking the toughest guy in your row what's going on i felt like but sometimes they don't even know sometimes shit we don't even know sometimes i have to the production.

[1] Can you rewind that?

[2] Like, what happened?

[3] So if you're seeing some guy moving around and like he looks like he's in agony and the referee doesn't say anything, you're like, what the fuck is going on?

[4] Oh yeah, that's a good point.

[5] I guess if the action's far on the other side of the cage, then you guys are kind of a little bit in the dark, huh?

[6] Sometimes when a guy's back has turned to you, you don't see if he got kicked in the nuts or poked in the eye.

[7] You miss a lot of stuff.

[8] Like, that's the beautiful thing about having that button.

[9] Like, I press this button and I talk to the truck.

[10] And I go, hey, can you rewind that for me, like, show me what happened.

[11] Yeah.

[12] Because sometimes, like, someone will complain about a nut shot and it turns out it's not a nut shot.

[13] It's like they hit them in a good spot, but they're pretending that it's a nut shot.

[14] Oh, to take some time to get a breather, maybe?

[15] Guys have done that before.

[16] I would do that.

[17] Oh, I would do that out of the gate, man. I would do that.

[18] I would hit myself in the nuts and call timeouts.

[19] The problem is when the audience sees that you didn't really get hit in the nuts, ooh, they get so mad.

[20] And then you feel that sting.

[21] Yeah.

[22] You know, it's like, then they want you to lose.

[23] And then when the other guy starts teeing off on you, the audience cheers.

[24] Oh, shit.

[25] Now they hate me. Yeah.

[26] Yeah, maybe I would, I bet I would still do it.

[27] But I would take the pain, man. Some of those fights are so grueling.

[28] It's a crazy way to make a living.

[29] Dustin's on top of the world right now.

[30] God damn, he's on fire, dude.

[31] He's on fire.

[32] He's got the big title shot coming up against Charles Olivero.

[33] Yeah.

[34] That's a great fight.

[35] Yeah, Oliverer didn't lose since.

[36] Felder, I think, was the last time that he lost.

[37] I think you're right.

[38] That was different.

[39] That was, yeah, Felder fucked him up with elbows from the top.

[40] Yeah, I'm so excited, man. Yeah, he's got a real good shot.

[41] But Olivera's so technical, man. He's like, he's so beautiful the way he moves, man. Everything he does is perfect.

[42] Like, his jiu -jitsu's perfect.

[43] His striking's perfect.

[44] Yeah.

[45] Oh, he's like a flamingo.

[46] He's like that violent flamingo.

[47] A flamingo.

[48] To me, in a way, you know, when I see him, he's more of a, it has almost a ballet to it.

[49] I don't mean that in, like, a negative term.

[50] That guy's a real tough and talented man. I know what you're saying.

[51] It's just beautiful.

[52] Yeah.

[53] Yeah.

[54] He's very technical.

[55] Like, his, everything he throws, it's like his punches, his kicks, even his submissions, it's all perfect technique.

[56] Yeah.

[57] He's one of the most interesting guys to watch for me because, you know, he never is out of position.

[58] He never, like, winds up, like, wild and throws, like, big crazy shit.

[59] You know, everything is, like, straight down the pipe.

[60] Everything is perfect position.

[61] Like, if you were going to start.

[62] study a striker or even a grappler or you just want to study someone's technique olivera is a great guy to study yeah because it just does everything right yeah i mean you've you've turned i think you've turned on a lot of people to the to the sport but definitely me uh i'll you know learn it from you from brend and just from hearing you guys talk about it enough i used to be afraid when the women would fight each other i would be like this has to stop you know what i'm saying i just felt so bad for the ovaries for the future children i would just be hilarious but now i'm like if i see shevchenko get in there dude i'm freaking doing the spins in the living room i'm fucking going all you know she's an assassin dude oh man he's an assassin it's been yeah that whole world uh do you think she's a spy oh no if you if you were going to have a spy come over here from russia wouldn't wouldn't it be valentin to shevchenko right well what's the other options well she's a just a straight -up assassin, like a real martial arts killer, which is what she really is.

[63] But, like, if this is a James Bond movie, tell me she wouldn't be the greatest spy of all time.

[64] She fucks up everybody.

[65] Yeah.

[66] And they're looking for a new James Bond.

[67] I think she would be great.

[68] Bro, she's got a gun tattooed.

[69] Does she?

[70] She got a gun tattooed on her hip.

[71] Right here.

[72] See if you can find Valentina Shepchenko's gun tattoo.

[73] She's a serious competitive shooter, too.

[74] Like, a serious Marx woman.

[75] Like a gunner?

[76] Do you say Mark's Woman?

[77] I've never said that before.

[78] Marksman or Mark Swain?

[79] I was going to say Marksman.

[80] Mark Swain.

[81] Mark Swain, like a, like a, look at her.

[82] Bro.

[83] Oh, damn, boy.

[84] That's a beautiful and terrifying woman.

[85] My God, I'd let her shoot me. I would, brother.

[86] I would freaking let her shoot me. As long as she did CPR after, I'd freaking let her put a couple in me, dog.

[87] Wow.

[88] She's straight up killer.

[89] She is.

[90] What is she like in person?

[91] she's a sweet lady oh it's very sweet very sweet super intelligent man she speaks four different languages she's uh you know just a very interesting person she travels for experiences like she she went to south america just for the experience of of taking in different cultures she lived there for a little while she's a totally different kind of person like very intense person but also like you know her her approach to martial arts very interesting you know she's like when you watch her fight she's another one like you talk about olivera everything she does is perfect the way the way she fires shots off the way she holds her hands up she never lets her heels touch the ground she's always bouncing around and moving she's a she's an amazing example to watch if you were a person that wanted to learn martial arts like who should i mimic like look at her look how she moves yeah amazing yeah that whole world's fascinating man yeah i'm excited for duster man i'm excited it's exciting The, yeah, being, being able to kind of get to know him over the years has been cool and, yeah, just that whole universe, man, seeing all these, like, it's just so, because I was always afraid to fight when I was a kid, you know, I was always, like, it was like, that would be the hardest thing, you know?

[92] Fighting is scary.

[93] So seeing people do it and, like, you know, and that's their way to express themselves, kind of.

[94] And make a living, I mean, that's how Dustin makes his money, which is crazy.

[95] Yeah.

[96] Imagine your whole, all the money to pay for food.

[97] in your house, all relies on you punching people in the face.

[98] Dang it's kind of crazy.

[99] Yeah, I would sneak around and do it.

[100] I don't know if I would do it like, I wouldn't do it like sanctioned.

[101] It's just such a nerve -wracking way to make a living because also like, you know, Dustin had to get surgery in his hip, you know, he's had stem cells and shit.

[102] Guys are always breaking their hands.

[103] Like your body is also what you need to make a living and bodies are vulnerable.

[104] They break.

[105] And Louisiana stem cells.

[106] Them bitch is probably has shrimp in them.

[107] You know what I'm saying?

[108] Like, you know what I'm saying?

[109] Like, that thing probably had a boule your base in it or something.

[110] I bet he went out of state.

[111] I bet he has rice in his hip right now.

[112] Some filler.

[113] Oh, they definitely put a little extra something in there.

[114] I bet he went out of state for those stem cells.

[115] Yeah, but that whole world is so exciting, man. I'll tune in to all the fights, man. I'll watch it even.

[116] I've even illegally streamed it if I'm real honest, man. I know.

[117] How would you do that when you have all that money?

[118] I don't know, man. I haven't done it a lot, but...

[119] It just was tempting?

[120] Yeah, I think it was just...

[121] I was at a different place.

[122] I probably wouldn't do them real well, you know?

[123] And I just illegally.

[124] Yeah, just, you know, yeah, I didn't have it.

[125] I didn't have the thing.

[126] Or now you go to different cities and you can't get your thing in the certain zone.

[127] Or like, you're not in this state.

[128] You can't do it or whatever.

[129] Well, ESPN Plus works everywhere.

[130] I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.

[131] Yeah, you just called me out on that one.

[132] But I've also paid for a lot of it The illegal streaming is wild It's kind of amazing they've been able to lock it up as much as they have Yeah Because basically anything that is like streaming online There's some wizard out there that knows that hack into that shit Pull that feed out and put it on something else It's just standard you know Yeah I think I mean obviously if you pay for it you get the real You're more guaranteed to hear what's going on you get the full deal yeah i like that sometimes when i watch fights i watch it in spanish just because i don't want to listen to commentary oh yeah i just want to watch the fight and i like listening i like it listening to music in other languages because i don't know what the fuck they're saying well i like that oh yeah i like listening to people talk in other languages because i don't have to know anything that's not what i mean i mean the sound like what do you mean like the gypsy kings like sometimes i like listening the songs that are in a language that I don't understand so I just I just like to hear the sound of it all like the way that like I don't know what they're saying but it sounds beautiful you know yeah yeah uh let me think what I've heard I've listened to some tribal music oh okay um dude I went through a period I was watching like funerals like Middle Eastern kind of um funerals online that were and they're like five hours long some of them and it's all like these chance and the people coming in in different robes and stuff and that you know that's like a nice filler i'll use the calm app i guess sometimes the calm map it's just like an app where people yeah i thought you were saying the call map no the calm map calm app no yeah calm app yeah come good is that helping you sleep yeah i think peace is becoming at a premium i think getting yeah getting some separation from stuff well you moved to nashville huh yeah i did did that give you peace it's definitely different is it better what would cause the move like what made you want to move well i didn't know if los angeles was ever going to be the same again it's not apparently they realized virginia that just the the the because the elections the virginia just went republican and los angeles just passed some new sweeping legislation about homelessness they're going to clean up all those tents and shit apparently were they going to put them exactly they went it they let it get too big and there's literally a hundred thousand people on the streets oh the park by my apartment there's freaking joe biden's aquarium out there dude it's a bunch of people just playing with i mean this is a guy had a femur the other day in the park they found like a human femur you know he'd written like yeah like there's people out i mean there's some dicey stuff one guy got in a hold of a um high school drum kit right can you this is this is the toughest part so this guy I am in the park, he's out there playing a high, like a, you know, at a high school drum, the shiny drum, this dude, I mean, all night, all hours, off hours, like.

[133] So while people were trying to sleep, and he's in the park.

[134] Like, they're annoyed that these people are in the park anyway.

[135] Yeah, and then they get this, you know, I don't know how they get the equipment.

[136] And the guy's playing, like, uptown, I think he even found, like, the sheet music that they used at high schools.

[137] He's playing, like, Carly Ray Jepson, like.

[138] call here's my number call me like he's just like it was a horrible man so when did you move what what month did you move let me see a year ago i started looking for places over there so you you gave it six eight months with the pandemic and then you're like fuck this this is not opening back up yeah i just didn't know i and i still don't know exactly what things will be like and um and also i mean there's tax savings like i definitely saved money by living in tennessee What's Tennessee of lower state taxes?

[139] Yeah, there's no state tax.

[140] Oh, like Texas.

[141] Like Texas, yeah.

[142] So that obviously is nice, you know, to save a little bit of money.

[143] Imagine going from this to California.

[144] You'd be like, wait a minute, why am I giving you this money?

[145] Yeah.

[146] You get how much 13%.

[147] That's a fucking agent and a manager, right?

[148] That's like a manager and a business manager.

[149] Yeah, that's a lot of money.

[150] That's a lot of money.

[151] And what are you doing?

[152] You're making people camp out in front of my fucking house?

[153] Yeah.

[154] And you're giving them freaking high school.

[155] drum equipment and you're telling people they have to have a vaccine to go to a bathroom yeah it's yeah there was just yeah I just didn't know it was too much it started to become too much and I just don't know if it's ever going to be the same and a lot of you know people were leaving some people were leaving you know you left Tom left and not like you're left forever it's not like you're like I've left forever right yeah but it's not like you're like cannot go back to there to visit I'm not going back to visit really Fuck that place.

[156] No way.

[157] Done.

[158] Are you really?

[159] Done.

[160] Dun, dun, dun, dun.

[161] I'll go back and do shows, like one every now.

[162] So there you go, right.

[163] One of year.

[164] But that's a lot.

[165] I'll drop into the forum.

[166] But that's like Santa.

[167] He comes freaking once a year.

[168] Yeah, that's what I'm going to be like.

[169] Okay, okay.

[170] I want to be like Rogie Claus.

[171] Dashing through the woods.

[172] I despise the government there.

[173] I despise it.

[174] I despise their smugness.

[175] The way they feel it's okay to close down rest of.

[176] restaurants and businesses, the way they feel it's okay to just tell people that you have no choice.

[177] Yeah, they felt like the, like, I don't know.

[178] I didn't feel as much like a person there.

[179] I feel more like a human being, I think, in Tennessee.

[180] Nashville's the shit, man. We were just there.

[181] We were just there.

[182] Dave and I were there like three weeks ago, two weeks ago.

[183] Not even.

[184] Last week?

[185] Yeah.

[186] Yeah, last week.

[187] It was awesome.

[188] Yeah, it's nice, man. It's really nice.

[189] I mean, it's like, it's just, it's like a, you forget what a, regular cities kind of like when you leave like Los Angeles you're in like I always feel like I'm in like the airport you know like that Los Angeles the whole thing feels like an airport to me like everyone's transient yeah like even when you leave your place you're it's all an airport it's like a layover right a layover that's a good way to put it the whole existence there feels like a layover yeah it doesn't feel like people are completely invested in living there right they all are there for a reason they're all there to get a job get a gig get it's too it's so showbiz related whether people want to admit it or not yeah it's showbiz related and now it's become oddly like internet showbiz related like there's all these tic -tok stars that show up at these restaurants and fill restaurants up yeah it's um like a mobbing or something or yeah tic -tok like takeout or something i think there's like different things yeah well like a lot of the like there's a lot of these high -end restaurants like i went to to Craigs and you know Craig from Craigs was there was this woman over there she's taking pictures with her phone just fucking he was letting me know she's a big TikTok star and I'm like okay but meanwhile what is she a star for she's just just being herself she's just her yeah and she's got a lot of TikTok followers so she has to like tick to like tick talk her meals and tick her face and tick to her surroundings but like he was treating her like she was a star like She's a Grammy winner.

[190] It was weird.

[191] Yeah, I guess it's weird, man. Everything's freaking weird.

[192] Everything feels like, doesn't everything feel weird?

[193] It's like everything shifted to another dimension.

[194] Yeah.

[195] Yeah.

[196] Like, we woke up and everything was like, you know, you remember when you had a radio station and you'd be in between radio stations, you kind of pick up a little bit of one, a little bit of, Like if you were driving.

[197] Yeah.

[198] That's what it feels like.

[199] It feels like we drove into another station.

[200] Like everything's similar, but not the same.

[201] Uh -uh.

[202] And you see people and they almost don't, like, well, one thing I do, I think, some people I feel like are just disappearing kind of.

[203] How so?

[204] Well, because, like, there's no workers anymore, they say at places.

[205] You go in, it's like, we're hiring.

[206] But people are everywhere.

[207] It's like, where is everybody?

[208] I feel like sometimes people are just disappearing, you know?

[209] Well, I think a lot of the, you know.

[210] that was unemployment benefits like I knew a dude he's a bartender and he was coming back to work he looked like a regular guy but he was coming back to work and he told his boss that he could only work 20 hours a week because if he worked anymore he wouldn't get his unemployment so he worked 20 hours a week and then he was getting his unemployment so he's working 20 hours a week.

[211] He was making $80 ,000 a year.

[212] Yeah.

[213] Yeah.

[214] I mean, you can't hate the guy.

[215] No, you can.

[216] That's the system.

[217] Well, the dude who was employing him was so frustrated because he's like, come on, man, I took care of you for years.

[218] And, you know, you work for me. We had a good relationship, you know, we took care of our employees.

[219] And he's like, but now you're kind of fucking me over here, man. You're saying you only want to work 20 hours a week.

[220] But then again, isn't it his, I mean, if that's available to him, why wouldn't he do that?

[221] Right.

[222] That's the problem.

[223] It's like...

[224] The availability of it.

[225] And it's bigger than them.

[226] They feel like, look, I'm not hurting the world if I only work 20 hours a week.

[227] And I get that unemployment.

[228] Because that unemployment is going to so many different people.

[229] Yeah.

[230] If you were the only guy sucking up all the money and you knew that it was going to...

[231] Like, kids are going to be hungry because you're taking that unemployment money.

[232] Then you'd be a piece of shit.

[233] But when you think about the government giving out money like that, people think, like, I'm going to get mine.

[234] Fuck it.

[235] Totally.

[236] Yeah.

[237] Yeah, you have one day, you walk up to a water fountain.

[238] and it doesn't work at the park you're like fuck damn i'm getting unemployment you know it's like i feel like that's how things equate in people's heads yeah for sure you know like if a ditch isn't big enough or something um but it just feels like everything's not working right anymore all of it yeah it feels like the fabric has been altered or stretched or something you know what i'm talking about flight's being canceled They try to lie and say it's the weather.

[239] And it's not.

[240] Pilots calling it sick.

[241] They're like, fuck this.

[242] They don't want to get vaccinated.

[243] I didn't think about that.

[244] That's what it is.

[245] 100%.

[246] Oh, man. It starts to make me nervous.

[247] Yeah, it should make you nervous.

[248] Things are kind of falling apart.

[249] It should make you nervous because it's not good.

[250] It's not good when things fall apart.

[251] The good thing is that it's forcing people to wake up and look at all these systems that are in place and sort of reconsider whether or not this one works or that one works and like what is wrong and what is right.

[252] And it also makes people think like you thought you were going to have this like very steady occupation.

[253] Like maybe say you're a bartender or a waiter and you're making good money every year and then also they took the restaurants away.

[254] Like you got to go, oh shit.

[255] Like I can't be dependent on this one individual source of income.

[256] Maybe I have to diversify.

[257] Maybe I have to think about doing something else for a living.

[258] Maybe have to take, you know, take matters into my own hands and start my own business or something.

[259] Yeah, grow yard crops or do like bees or something.

[260] People are doing all kinds of stuff.

[261] There's a lot of small businesses starting up too.

[262] Yeah, I was reading about this lady who makes honey.

[263] She's got this booming business making honey, just handling bees.

[264] Yeah, my brother's, my brother's, not his girlfriend, his wife's friend makes bee.

[265] They make bee stuff.

[266] Hey, I was supposed to do this the other day, but we did.

[267] didn't be candles i had a party uh party i had a podcast it was kind of a party uh Shane Gillis Mark Norman I'll listen to it this morning at the gym careful once you open that bag it's gets gnarly oh Jesus yeah smelling salts you're not supposed to open your eyes and waft it don't sniff it bro just the just that's why I've been kept it I took it out of my and that's fully sealed yeah well smelling salts can I try one well you don't try one well you don't it's like just open up the back this is the idea okay there's a gentleman on the podcast the other day is a power lifter Rob Kearney and Rob told us we were talking about smelling salts the gay power lifter guy yeah it's world's strongest gay is his Instagram and he was telling us about god it's fucking nasty um he was telling us about smelling salts we're talking about smelling salts and about like it's a big deal he has actually a smelling salt sponsor so jamie went out and got some smelling salts all right And just open that bag.

[268] Don't even, by the way, the bottle is completely sealed.

[269] Okay.

[270] But if you just open up the bag, you'll smell how fucking rank that shit is.

[271] It also has the emblem from the saw movies on it, which is way dicey.

[272] Get a whiff.

[273] Wow.

[274] And that's a sealed bottle.

[275] We're live.

[276] It's fully plastic sealed.

[277] I feel like we should open it.

[278] But if we open it, is it bad to open in this room?

[279] No, but we can handle some.

[280] The warning says, like, don't smell it more than a couple times a day.

[281] Look, but listen, this smell, like, folks, I just want you to know.

[282] We're freaking out about the smell, and the plastic is, you hear that?

[283] That's Theo taking the plastic off the bottle.

[284] So that bitch was sealed up.

[285] Oh, my God.

[286] I'll do a couple of these bitches on.

[287] I've been through some things, boy.

[288] Okay, get a whiff.

[289] Bro, it is in rock.

[290] Don't spill it.

[291] Yeah, you're supposed, I think you're supposed to leave it in there.

[292] I don't think you're supposed to take it out.

[293] Okay.

[294] You have to shake it, though.

[295] I think you just take a whiff.

[296] they do that right before they lift are you okay yeah before they lift what bro before they lift weights before they lift the fucking universe before they lift their future take a gander on that with your face header daddy take a gander on that with that face hitter Joe there's something about just holding it up over here is rough but there's something about this stuff that like when you take a whiff of it right before you lift It's supposed to, like, jolt your nervous system, right?

[297] Is that the idea?

[298] I think it's so you forget about everything else except for that.

[299] I have no idea.

[300] Take a ride on that hitter.

[301] Boom!

[302] Oh, my God!

[303] Well, Lavera goes down!

[304] Holy shit!

[305] Is that shocking?

[306] Oh, my God.

[307] Oh, my God.

[308] That's stunning.

[309] I would have never imagined.

[310] Take that to the fights this weekend.

[311] That's something you buy at a Nelly concert.

[312] Take it to the fights.

[313] If anybody needs it.

[314] You can use that lid.

[315] Oh, Jesus.

[316] Give me that plastic bag, too.

[317] Oh, that's so unnecessary.

[318] You want to try it?

[319] I'm great.

[320] No, you just take a hit.

[321] I believe you.

[322] No, it's not that bad.

[323] Well, it's not painful.

[324] Is it worse than that rice that drink?

[325] Yeah.

[326] Get a hit, Jamie.

[327] You're going to be fine.

[328] You're an adult.

[329] My friend Megan gave me this drink from Mexico.

[330] It was like turpentine.

[331] Yeah.

[332] It lights on fire.

[333] Whoa, right?

[334] Like, whoa, Nelly.

[335] I'm tearing up I got one of my eyes teared what is that is that ammonia right I don't know what the fuck it is and it's in Rob Rob takes a sniff of that shit for you powerless I feel like I've smelled that when a kid pukes in elementary school that's what they used to like clean it up or sprinkle oh I think that's different that's in rock form I think that's much more potent you okay yeah I'm great this one front of the back oh yeah that's tech huh oh boy man I can't handle less smoke baby so Rob like we'll take a sniff of those before he like lifts a 450 pound log over his head i could see that i definitely feel more clear i feel like it's a whole bag of native american right there baby do you think you should take a sniff in that before you go on stage maybe oh i don't know it almost gets you too separate from your thoughts right it's so wild yeah it's so jolting it's good man thank you for that i think all those powerlifters use it though don't i think all of them do Yeah, mostly, yeah It's a big deal I've seen those guys They do and sometimes They get smacked in the face Like their girlfriend will smack them There's a bunch of these videos Of this one dude To tough in their cheeks up It wakes you up from being knocked out right It's the same like when they break The little thing Yeah I think that's exactly the same thing Yes Yeah Oh that would wake me up I'd be dead That'd bring me back At least for a few minutes Wow Jesus Christ And we are back And we're back Whoa my nose is still Infected with it Like when I take a deep breath I still smell it.

[336] Imagine how small those particles are and they're just inside your nose.

[337] Well, also, we didn't even get any of the dust out.

[338] Like, that's in a rock.

[339] People don't understand, I think also, do you see it's in a...

[340] Yeah, I didn't even look in there.

[341] Like a crystal or something.

[342] I just trust you.

[343] Oh, it is.

[344] I didn't look in there.

[345] But I just went like that.

[346] I didn't even have it more than like five inches from my nose.

[347] It sounds like it's still in, like, wide open in the room.

[348] Exactly.

[349] I like it.

[350] It's in your nose.

[351] Yeah.

[352] Oh.

[353] God.

[354] I'm ready.

[355] I'm here.

[356] I like that a little.

[357] I'll hit a marker sometime.

[358] I'll hit a...

[359] I like markers.

[360] I'll go three hits on Duster, dude.

[361] Not enough to fucking damage myself, but I will take a risk with it, you know?

[362] There's something about magic markers.

[363] Yeah, I think even...

[364] Pop those hopped?

[365] That's a nice smell.

[366] And then smile at somebody after.

[367] That was my favorite thing to do.

[368] Do you like gasoline when you pump your gas?

[369] Dude, we had a guy drank gasoline on Halloween one time.

[370] This kid, Todd, had to get his stomach.

[371] Why did he do that?

[372] I don't know.

[373] Do you remember when Kitty Dukakis, when Mike Dukakis was running for president, his wife apparently had like an alcohol problem, and she was trying to get off of it, but then snapped one day and drank a bunch of, like, after shave?

[374] Mm -mm.

[375] Remember that?

[376] I remember Michael Dukakis running.

[377] Didn't Jesse Jackson run against him?

[378] Also hairspray She drank hairspray?

[379] A lot of things Jesus Christ When you want it, you want it, you know Hairspray is rough though Kitty Dukakis drank hairspray Wow, after shave hairspray and other household products to induce oblivion and fight depression before seeking treatment This was like 1988 Yeah So if it's 1988 like nail polish Remover And coding And coding.

[380] What do you, what kind of antidepressants did they have in 1988?

[381] Nothing does.

[382] They just kicked you.

[383] Well, they had, I mean, they had you trying to find anything that you could to get better.

[384] Did they have antidepressants back then?

[385] Tickling each other, I guess.

[386] I mean, what did they have?

[387] What did they do when people were depressed in 1988?

[388] Right.

[389] When was SSRIs?

[390] When did those get introduced?

[391] I mean, Prozac didn't come in until probably mid -90s, huh?

[392] Even for the rich people, yeah.

[393] I wonder.

[394] Let's find out.

[395] Like, what was the first antidepressant?

[396] The first SSRI approved marketing in the U .S. lasted, 1998, March, 182.

[397] Okay, so it was before then.

[398] Wow.

[399] What was that one?

[400] Maybe it was selective serotonomy upticket were introduced to the market in 1987 with the introduction of fluoxetine.

[401] Phloxatine.

[402] You know, fluvovoxamine, I think that's how you say it.

[403] Flovoxamine is, they're finding it works for treating COVID.

[404] Doctors are using phlovoxamine, which is an anti -depress.

[405] Dr. Drew was telling me about it.

[406] Dr. Drew was in, he's smart.

[407] He's very smart.

[408] He was in New Orleans when we were doing our show out there, and he was explaining how fluoxamine, how it works.

[409] But there was a bunch of articles that I just read recently.

[410] Yeah, I've taken, I took antidepressants.

[411] I just got off.

[412] did you have COVID antibodies you didn't even know you had COVID yeah I didn't even know you had it and beat it and just brushed it on let's go dude I'm a one -stripe white belt so let's go when did uh do you have any idea when you were sick no I didn't have any I didn't know until just now today that I had any inkling of it you know I think I felt for a little bit like I couldn't smell something but I don't know if that's real or if I just was too busy to smell that hard you know what I'm saying no I don't know you're saying especially I wonder that is interesting if we get somebody who's got no sense of smell and run that shit by him right you think you got no sense of smell take a gander I wouldn't have well I did taste test of a lot of stuff I couldn't taste anything I would have loved to bust the cap on that bad boy in front of you that's like Mr. Clem busted a nut in your nose so that might bring your smell back that might bring your smoke back I got a friend of mine one of his friends has a buddy who has not tasted anything in eight months and he's going crazy.

[413] That might be bad for you though if you couldn't smell that and it just kept breathing it?

[414] Oh yeah.

[415] Well it stings.

[416] So you can't smell it but didn't it sting your nose?

[417] Yeah, it burned a little.

[418] That's the part I really enjoy the heightened sense.

[419] I like that buzz man. Yeah it's um oh like I could still smell it yeah do that still smell it.

[420] I would smell it again honestly.

[421] You want a bottle of that?

[422] I'll give you one to go no don't do it.

[423] Take it with you.

[424] I'll do too Open that bitch on the plane.

[425] I'll do too much, man. I'll do too much.

[426] I will, man. You'd be the only dude to check it to rehab for smelling salts.

[427] Woo.

[428] That's foul.

[429] Yeah, that's a lot, man. Yeah, if you couldn't smell, that should be what they use to find out if you could smell.

[430] Bust that over.

[431] Yeah, because they're using regular stuff like, oh, can you smell this watermelon spray?

[432] Can you smell this?

[433] Potato chips.

[434] Yeah, potato chips.

[435] That's insane.

[436] Potato chips smell good Yeah, but they're not as strong, really When I don't want to eat potato chips You know, like I'm trying to watch my diet But I'll open up a bag of ruffles And just get a sniff I love that smell The smell like potatoes that were cooked in hot oil Yeah I can't help myself I'm a potato chip junkie I love potato chips Especially them kettle chips Oh yeah The kettle chips came out remember they didn't really have them and then suddenly they came out of nowhere like they were better yeah like everything i think they keep going to things to the past and they make them better like they go back and get a kettle and they made it better like i noticed toothpaste has charcoal in it now do you notice that yeah that's supposed to make your teeth wider but remember that was what they were using in the beginning that's what they used like a long time ago it's like we keep going to the past and getting stuff and be like oh right now see it yeah what else um let me think charcoal what was the other one Drinking water.

[437] Drinking water?

[438] Yeah, do they do that?

[439] Did they?

[440] What do we name already?

[441] Dude, that thing I think got me buzzed out.

[442] It's got me buzzed out, for sure.

[443] For sure.

[444] Dude, I'll tell you what I mean buzzed out.

[445] I was listening to Nellie on the way here with that driver, dude.

[446] That guy is in.

[447] Dude, Nellie in his prime had some fucking great songs.

[448] Great songs.

[449] Yeah.

[450] Nellie was the only guy who made me. as a white person or predominantly white made me feel like I could dance or be a part of something you say predominantly white what percentage do you do you feel like without a DNA test what percentage you do you feel like is not white I would say probably 30 % really yeah that's a strong number yeah I would say that accurate I'm Nicaraguan and a little something else in there a little Native American I think did you get a DNA test done You're just guessing.

[451] I don't think so.

[452] But I'm just looking at the chart.

[453] If you had to draw, if somebody drew it out, I think you would.

[454] Yeah.

[455] You would see it out there.

[456] Did you see that Netflix special where Colin Kaepernick is comparing the NFL to slavery?

[457] Bro.

[458] Throza Parks.

[459] That's what I call that dude.

[460] Throws a park.

[461] It is, that is the lamest that it.

[462] I did try to watch it.

[463] It's the dumbest comparison.

[464] It makes me sad.

[465] Because it feels like the lowest, it's like the lowest pandering for racism that you could create.

[466] It's almost infantile, the pandering of it.

[467] And I think it takes away from real race, like real racist shit that it's just like.

[468] Imagine comparing the ability to do it or not do it.

[469] Oh, yeah.

[470] You sign up for it.

[471] Everybody, like so many people who play football want to be in the NFL.

[472] It's a goal.

[473] It's a dream.

[474] You can make millions of dollars.

[475] And imagine comparing that to slavery simply because they measure people's physical performance.

[476] That's what he was doing.

[477] He was measuring like wingspans and the combine scores like for weightlifting and speed and all that stuff.

[478] That's to see how physically adapt you are, how good you're going to be at football.

[479] Yeah.

[480] So they'll give you tons of money.

[481] Yeah.

[482] The idea that this is comparable to slavery.

[483] Whoever fucking wrote that down, and then the fact that he read it and said it, and then they had that video where they compare in the NFL owners to the slave masters and they're shaking hands with each, like, what the fuck are you talking about?

[484] And it's such a racist thing towards white people, because if you're just a right, and it's like, because all the owners there are white, it's just blatantly white guy.

[485] It's just like, I don't know.

[486] Well, it's insulting to the players, too.

[487] Can you imagine you're comparing the players to slaves, the players that want to be there?

[488] It's a life goal.

[489] It's a dream.

[490] They're actually NFL stars.

[491] Like, they're actual superstars in the NFL.

[492] And someone is comparing you to a slave.

[493] Right.

[494] You're making millions.

[495] And someone's comparing you to a slave.

[496] Yeah, it diminishes what the work you've done.

[497] It's just absurd.

[498] Right.

[499] But also it diminishes all your hard work and now you're going to say, oh, that I'm a slave.

[500] Like, it's just a cheap way to look at.

[501] it uh i don't know it just felt like reaching so hard just so hard like no one watched that and went yeah if they did they need to go to a doctor yeah somebody needs to talk to you yeah have a seat in the couch yeah you okay hit him with those salts wake up throws up throws the parks ladies and gentlemen i hate to repeat my own jokes but it's a good joke that's a great joke throws a parks and it's just what he's become it's like get out of here man you know how comics like well there's real racism out there going on in all facets and just to beat that that's the drum they continue to beat that's what's like it's like you could shine so many other there's so many other right avenues of racism going on in the world and you continue to beat this black white old this thing is just getting a little bit that's a bit much exactly the darkest thing i think that's going on this country is the ignoring of these horrible neighborhoods that have never gotten better and not doing anything to make them better, not putting any money into like, like when you look at like south side of Chicago, just traditionally been riddled with gangs and drugs and crime, the fact that that hasn't been looked at as like, we have to fix this.

[502] Like, we have to go in there and dump a ton of resources, a ton of money.

[503] We got to fix this.

[504] And you have all these people that are growing up in this area that start off in life, fucked.

[505] Yeah.

[506] And the fact that you can't, if you look at, looked at all those people that are fucked in this neighborhood and just imagined that those same people now imagine they're born in a place where there is no gang violence.

[507] There is no like constant history of people being incarcerated and drugs.

[508] Imagine they have this chance at education, at pursuing their dreams.

[509] And imagine how many winners are going to come out of that environment and contribute to society and invent things and start businesses and employ people and do well for their family and for everybody else around them like that that is the biggest tragedy in this country that they're ignoring these horrible communities and that it happens year after year after year decade after decade it doesn't change but don't you think I mean they've probably tried to help them right I don't think they have I don't think they don't jack shit well the soil definitely matters the soil that you're in yeah growing up and that sort of I mean, it matters to a level that's, it's unbelievable how much it matters.

[510] It does.

[511] And here's the dark part, though.

[512] This is the thing that troubles me. Everybody that I know that's like super focused and super intense and really interesting came from a fucked up environment.

[513] It's like, I don't want fucked up environments, but most of my favorite people came out of a fucked up environment and they survived it.

[514] Like they survived pressure and they survived strife and hardship.

[515] And then they became these amazing people.

[516] So I'm kind of contradicting myself.

[517] Well, I think you need it.

[518] I think you want some of it.

[519] But it's like, do you want it at a level where it's like so violent and so dangerous where it's like, you know, it feels un -manageable?

[520] Right.

[521] That there's no manageability.

[522] Then that's really, that's not really the neatest thing.

[523] This is how crazy Chicago is.

[524] There was a, I want you to Google this, Jamie, because it's so nuts you can't even believe it's real.

[525] There was a gunfight in Chicago.

[526] We used to rival gangs were shooting each other.

[527] I believe it was five guys shooting each other.

[528] They expended like 70 rounds in the street.

[529] None of them were charged because they said it was mutual combat.

[530] Mm -hmm.

[531] Like you're allowed to just shoot at each other in the street.

[532] This is how ridiculous Chicago's government.

[533] is.

[534] This is how fucking pathetic it is.

[535] They literally let these guys shoot at each other in the street and they didn't charge them because they said it's mutual combat.

[536] You are sending the worst possible message to people out there that are thinking about shooting at people.

[537] Well, it's like how close do we to that becoming sanctioned and fucking Keith Peterson out there, ref, you know what I'm saying?

[538] Like, what's next?

[539] Look at this.

[540] No charges in deadly Chicago shootout due to mutual combat.

[541] I'd put Keith Peterson out there in a heartbeat too.

[542] Dude, let a fucking rep this shit.

[543] One shooter was left dead, and two suspects were wounded in the shootout, which required the assistance of a SWAT team.

[544] The gunfight, which was caught on a police surveillance camera, ended when a police cruiser pulled up on the block.

[545] More than 70 shell casings were found on the street, though the amount was likely higher, given that didn't include shots fired from the other location.

[546] So this means that two people were dead, one dead and two injured.

[547] What, didn't it just say, scroll back up?

[548] Didn't it say different numbers?

[549] Two specs were wounded, one was left dead, okay.

[550] And then, oh, that we're there.

[551] So they have a video of it.

[552] Put the video up and let's listen to it.

[553] Does it have any volume to it?

[554] He's not playing volume.

[555] So all we're seeing is people running.

[556] It's hard to tell what the fuck's going on.

[557] But the fact that two people are wounded, one person is dead, They know these guys shot them They have surveillance footage You have cops on the scene And no one was charged There's a guy dead Lane in the street that got shot And no one was charged How the fuck can you not charge people for that?

[558] Well here's one of the issues that I think you start to see Honestly is Once people are charged Is the Are they being prosecuted Are actual things happening then afterwards Because We had a We had a border patrol a border security guy who ran the border security along like Arizona and in Mexico right had him come on the podcast recently and he was talking about how one of the issues that they were facing recently is that they arrest people or they there's no point to arrest them because they're not being actually prosecuted after they're arrested if that makes any sense right I don't know if that's happening in this sort of environment but does it feel futile for the cops that nothing's being you know what I'm saying like right I don't know I'm just trying to think of why somebody would not I mean I don't know it's just so scary and then can you imagine you grow up there you're a kid you're somebody like yeah and then you realize like this is reality someone could shoot at you and they don't even get charged so the first thing you're going to do is want to shoot and not only that not just shoot at you but one guy's dead and no one's charged with murder so somebody out there murdered that guy and they just let him go I thought you know it's getting weird it's getting weird well all this defund the police like people have opened up a can of worms that you can't close once you once you change the way people look at law and order and and make it so that people can just shoot at people and just walk you've you've you've changed society I fund them I fucking bought two up in lunch up last week I bought two guys lunched I said look I'm gonna fund you guys right now man I'm gonna fill y 'all up yeah don't defund fund it's such a shady it's just it's a tough job you know the toughest could you imagine other than being a soldier there's very few jobs that are scary as being a cop yeah man what is scarier firemen maybe is in that if you're actually running into a burning building you might die it's the same sort of feeling and meanwhile they're fucking they closed down how many firehouses in new york city today what is it it's some crazy number like more than 20 firehouses were closed in new york city because of the vaccine mandate a lot of these guys already got COVID and they don't want to get vaccinated on top of it because it compounds your possible adverse reactions like you have more of a chance to get an adverse reaction if you've already had COVID and then you get vaccinated more of a chance of having like an immune system response that's negative so there's a lot of these guys and also they don't want the fucking that dipshit mayor of New York telling people what to do that's a lot of it I think also there's a level for as a human being you don't want somebody telling you what, you know, some guy who seems like somebody who's not of your ilk telling you what to do with your body.

[559] I think there's a lot of that.

[560] Also, when you know there has to be some influence by the pharmaceutical companies that are influencing this and trying to get people to get vaccinated, even if they don't need it.

[561] Yeah.

[562] Yeah.

[563] A hundred percent.

[564] Sorry, but a hundred percent.

[565] Yeah.

[566] Which is why you're not hearing about the monoclonal antibodies.

[567] Monoclonal antibodies.

[568] fix people up.

[569] Is that what I have?

[570] No, you have antibodies from an actual infection, but monoclonal antibodies are an actual infusion that they give you when you're sick, and they're trying to keep it from people.

[571] The government is trying to restrict it.

[572] They're trying to, Ron DeSantis is handing it out in Florida, and the Biden administration tried to stop the amount of monoclonal antibodies that were coming to Florida.

[573] They were saying they were evenly distributing in the country, but what they're really doing is, this is the guy was looking for them.

[574] He was actively seeking them and they were limiting the amount that he could get.

[575] It's not like there's a supply problem with monoclonal antibodies.

[576] It's the government actually trying to restrict people's access to it.

[577] And I think it's because if you do have access to it, even if you're unvaccinated, if you get monoclonal antibodies when you're sick, you get better really quickly.

[578] I have two friends that just got it and just got monoclonal antibodies and they got better like that.

[579] I got better like that.

[580] Yeah, I mean, I don't know.

[581] I think people should kind of be able to make their own choice.

[582] It's always been the case.

[583] Why is it different now?

[584] Well, the pandemic and this is, you know, you're affecting others.

[585] But guess what?

[586] Now we know for sure that even if you're vaccinated, you're still spreading it.

[587] You're still spreading it.

[588] You're still getting it.

[589] It's like once time is passed, unless we're going to keep shooting people up with booster shots to the end of time, there's going to come a point in time where we realize you've got to revert back to what it used to be, letting people have autonomy about their own bodies and let them have their own personal choices about what to do and what not to do because this is not a vaccine like the polio vaccine or the measles or something that actually stops you from ever getting it.

[590] This is a different, this is a gene therapy.

[591] Well, I'll say two things I'd like to think about this.

[592] You know, I grew up in an area where they had the polio vaccine was created in our town in Covington, Louisiana.

[593] Was it really?

[594] Tulane Primate Center at the primate testing facility I think I might have told you because I remember they let us out of the YMCA camp to literally wrangle chimps that had got out one day the police came and got us out of camp and got the tallest kids to go help them get Oh, you told me about this.

[595] We're outside of a damn Kenny Rogers Roasters fucking like trying to scare chimps and you told me they'll steal your body and everything, remember?

[596] So, but dude, that vaccine they made for people for polio it gave cervical cancer to millions of women but they'd already made the vaccine right really yeah so i'm not saying that like i'm not saying that that's what's going on but i'm saying that there's there's no long -term studies in terms of not yet the negative effects not yet not yet but it's it's happening mass experience it's happening in real time that's a scary part but the second thing for me is um uh oh i forgot about it.

[597] Well, the fact that there is, I mean, an insane amount of people that are taking this and not knowing what the negative adverse side effects are and promoting it as if there's no negative adverse side effects.

[598] We don't really know.

[599] Right.

[600] Like long term?

[601] We don't know.

[602] We have no idea.

[603] And that's, I mean, it might be nothing.

[604] Might be nothing.

[605] Might be nothing.

[606] Might be nothing.

[607] Might be the smallest of small people, like in terms of the, uh, the, um, the, the amount of them have an adverse reaction.

[608] Yeah.

[609] But that might not be the case.

[610] Might be grow a fucking dorsal fin, you know what I'm saying?

[611] Like we just, but I mean, we don't know.

[612] Yeah.

[613] We don't know in that.

[614] So I think, yeah, people should have autonomy.

[615] Like you said, autonomy that I think choose what they want to do.

[616] And they feel, I think, really compressed and ostracized by a lot of media and a lot of job, like just fear.

[617] There's a ton of just, they put so much fear into people.

[618] Well, it's also they're putting pressure on businesses.

[619] to make this decision where you want, it's like you get less grief if all of your employees are vaccinated.

[620] So just force all your employees to get vaccinated.

[621] And then people are like, wait a minute, I have to be vaccinated to get this job to keep it.

[622] What if, what if I already had COVID?

[623] No, no, no, one size fits all.

[624] This is it.

[625] But if you've already had COVID, they know that you're six to 13 times more protected, according to the study out of Israel, the biggest study, 2 .5 million people.

[626] They said you're six to 13.

[627] times more protected than someone who's vaccinated.

[628] If you have antibodies.

[629] Yeah.

[630] Let's go.

[631] Let's go.

[632] You got them antibodies, hon. I'm a body -bodied up, boy.

[633] You're antibodyed and you didn't even know you had it.

[634] That's perfect.

[635] Yeah.

[636] You cruised through.

[637] That's how we do it, Joe.

[638] That is how you do it.

[639] That's how we do it.

[640] Play some Nelly.

[641] Remember when he burned his face?

[642] Remember somebody said he was blowing out a birthday candle or something?

[643] Remember when he had that?

[644] I think the band -aid was just for fun.

[645] I think he just put band -aids on his face.

[646] it was a thing because other dudes had band -aids on their face back then too i think he started i think it was i heard that it was a birthday candle incident and then after and he had to be like on MTV movie awards at night or something oh so he put a band -aid on and then it became a thing it became a thing because i know there were dudes that were copying him that were just putting band -aids on we were copying him all of us there was nothing wrong with you i had fucking look like i got bit in a fire you know what i'm like yo street in the range road with a fucking Shit, boy.

[647] Fucking raping my head and gauze over there.

[648] It was fun, man. God, Nellie was so unbelievably good.

[649] What stops a guy like that?

[650] Like, if you go back and think of a comic from that era, like, those guys are still funny today and they're still killing it, still making specials.

[651] But what was the last time you heard a new Nelly song?

[652] So what happens?

[653] Is it because they have to work with all these different producers and musicians and, like, there's all sorts of other moving parts that they can't control?

[654] control the beats you know i think some for some stars there's just the i mean that album was so good the i don't think it's called country grammar i don't that same it was country grandma yeah that's the album it was that but that there's seven i think number ones on that smashes the same happened to 50 cent though like he said other good songs well also 50 cent had a big stake in vitamin water and he made like a half a billion dollars from vitamin water.

[655] It's supposed to like 10 TV shows right now.

[656] Yeah.

[657] Yeah, he got into producing more.

[658] He's had a lot of things happen.

[659] He's been in movies.

[660] But the thing, I think the big thing was that vitamin water.

[661] He got that vitamin water.

[662] He's like, oh, oh.

[663] I know we're working.

[664] It's over, bitch.

[665] I got $500 million.

[666] It's over.

[667] I think he just...

[668] He's filling all his bullet holes of vitamin water on his body, drinking it out of it with a straw.

[669] I mean, what a lucky break.

[670] There's a few of those dudes that, like, got in early with companies and just fucking scored.

[671] Something, yeah.

[672] I was reading about another one recently where someone got in with a few thousand dollars off of something and made more than a hundred million.

[673] Damn.

[674] God, what was that?

[675] I'm trying to remember what that was.

[676] But it's, you know, you get lucky, you know, buying to Uber in the early days or something, you know.

[677] Was it Nas?

[678] What's it?

[679] Nause?

[680] What did Nas have?

[681] I mean, he's made, he's a billionaire because of his investments.

[682] Lil Nas is a billionaire?

[683] No, not Lil Nas, the real Nas.

[684] He's original.

[685] OG.

[686] Greatest lyricist in all of hip -hop.

[687] He kind of, he kind of, not disappear, but I guess he just produces now.

[688] His new fucking CD is the shit.

[689] His new album is very good.

[690] It's classic Nas.

[691] He's the best lyricist.

[692] His lyrics are amazing.

[693] Wow, he's a billionaire.

[694] He's a billionaire.

[695] Or close to it.

[696] I might have, like, bumped him up a little bit.

[697] He just fucked him up.

[698] Now people are going to be hitting them up for a loan.

[699] Oh, no. Yeah, I don't think I'm thinking.

[700] You know, look.

[701] I'm going to DM him right here.

[702] Rapper Nause adds cigars to his expansive investment portfolio.

[703] He's a smart motherfucker dude.

[704] What's a product you think you would come out with, Joe?

[705] What's your product you think?

[706] Well, I mean, I was already one of the original guys on it, and we came out with a bunch of products.

[707] Right.

[708] All a bunch of stuff like this, like AlphaBrain, stuff that I really use.

[709] And then all the strength and conditioning equipment that I really used.

[710] use like kettlebells and has there ever been something kind of obtuse you know something that's really or just you know like a that i would come out with yeah maybe a seasoning or a um maybe it would be like archery related maybe i would come out with a broadhead you know or you know work in conjunction with uh some archery related company for something for bow hunting yeah i'd be into doing something like that because that's i mean if i have like passions things that i do all the time you know that I'm really into that's one of that's like I look forward to September that's my Christmas because September is my bow hunting month that's when I go and elk hunt and that's when the rut happens you go out in the mountains and the animals are doing sex out there they're doing sex out there and when September they're also doing violence are they really smashing heads into each other yeah I've seen a lot of that dude it's wild to hear when you're out in the mountains and you hear you hear him screaming and you hear crack crack crack crack crack where they're just smashing antlers against each other.

[711] Oh, dude, and they're all bone.

[712] Those antlers are the quickest growing bone.

[713] Oh, my God.

[714] When they're horny, what's crazy is they're only mean to each other for like a month.

[715] And then the rest of the month, the rest of the year, they're like, cool, they're just hanging.

[716] Like, you know.

[717] Because it starts in their body and makes them mean.

[718] They want to keep everybody away from their bitches.

[719] Yeah, I've wanted that.

[720] Mm -hmm.

[721] If you ever want to keep a, yeah.

[722] Did you imagine if that's how it was with people, we only fucked once a year?

[723] and right before that time you started growing horns on your head and we stabbed each other with our heads.

[724] Herb Dean, get Herb Dean out there right before.

[725] You imagine if that's how people bred like animals, if we had to like physically battle each other for the right to stick up.

[726] I think we could use it because one of the toughest things about being a society is people can just fuck and this they keep me. You can make any, there's no like, there's this open.

[727] open end to society where it's just like any idiot can have a kid and then abuse that kid and then that kid grows up all fucked up and then that kid becomes a problem in society because you know they were raised by shitty dumb people so no matter how much work you do up here in the top in the middle and even at some of the lower levels there's just this revolving like nut at the bottom that's just coming out just you know ejaculate and ignorance if it wants to you know there's this loose peace you know there is one problem that's real that exists in nature right in nature the weak get culled like the weak animals they don't breed they don't survive right but in our world weak is not physical anymore it's like we've made it so that weak physical people are sometimes the strongest most powerful people like if you think about like billionaire Bill Gates like he's frail he's got a pot belly and he's meanwhile he's worth a hundred billion dollars like these kind of people so it has it's more about their minds and the business they've created than it is about like physical health and vitality right the strong and powerful are no longer like physically strong and powerful which is probably wise because otherwise you'd have like the biggest like the mountain from the game of thrones be the king of the world right because you can fuck everybody up but because they invented weapons and then they invented technology and then it kind of balanced everything out but on the downside of that is that there's no physical requirements at all to be like to be able to get through its society so incredibly weak frail people can breed and I mean when I see incredibly weak and frail I mean mentally as well oh I've seen them they can they they have this it's too easy to survive is what I'm saying so like these assholes who don't take care of their children who abuse their families people that are just fucked up people they have no problem breeding and then they might have people you know all over the place that they fuck and give birth to or they give birth to their children so you have all these kids that they're not being taken care of and it's like shit how do you fix that well nature would have fixed it right but we can't have that because it's barbaric it's horrible You can't have those, like, the weak people die off and they get slaughtered by the strong people.

[728] Right, it's barbaric.

[729] It's barbaric.

[730] Right.

[731] And that's the thing that's different about being a human is we don't do as much barbarism.

[732] We do in a weird way.

[733] Right.

[734] Not blatantly, though, where we're out just beat, you know, you can't see somebody, you know, dragged your neighbor out and just beat him in the street and kill him just because the guys, you know, not, you know, hadn't been, you know, paying his water bill or, like, or can't read.

[735] Like, here's an interesting situation.

[736] Like, everybody is, the news about that Alec Baldwin accidental shooting is crazy, right?

[737] It's gigantic news.

[738] He killed a woman on the set.

[739] The director of photography, shot the director.

[740] I mean, it's a crazy fucked up story.

[741] But the Biden administration, they droned a family in Afghanistan.

[742] I mean, I think it was seven kids, like 10 people dead, seven over the way.

[743] dude it's crazy yeah let's find out what that was but meanwhile you don't hear a peep about it yeah you literally don't hear a peep about it's like whoops and then like occasionally someone brings it up on twitter and it gets no steam it doesn't catch any momentum well the the the the the the presidents now are you know i was thinking the other day that america it feels like this shell corporation for it used to feel like this real thing to me when i was growing up and it was like i'm part of america and we're like we're all doing our best and everybody's trying and you help out the person that's struggling and you know I I like to romanticize stuff you know I like that me too and so but then now sometimes I feel like man I think that's part of the thing that feels disconnected these days is I think I don't know well the more they pledged loyalty to corporations the more it feels like right right and it feel like it's about us yes and it feels like a shit like like like America's like just an LLC now for this like here goes look at this bigger thing that's happening.

[744] You're 100 % right.

[745] Afghan family says errant U .S. missile killed 10, including seven children, relative friends and colleagues of I don't know, I don't want to fuck this person's name up.

[746] Zamari Amadi angrily dismissed any suggestion that he had ties to ISIS.

[747] Oh, damn.

[748] The U .S. military is investigating.

[749] So they droned an innocent family.

[750] To ISIS K, I guess there's a subgroup, I guess.

[751] It's like LBGTK.

[752] Yeah.

[753] They keep adding.

[754] It's like, yeah.

[755] They do that ISIS.

[756] There should be gay ISIS.

[757] There has to be a gay ISIS group.

[758] You can't be gay.

[759] You can't be gay and be an ISIS, you know?

[760] That's like being a black white supremacist.

[761] But actually, that's possible now.

[762] You're saying that.

[763] Oh, yeah.

[764] Anytime a black person says anything, like, doesn't go with the democratic narrative, they said that person's carrying water for white supremacists.

[765] Oh, it's unbelievable.

[766] They're out of their fucking mind.

[767] That lady that was the new lieutenant governor of Virginia that is a black woman who, uh, She's sponsored by the NRA.

[768] I mean, I don't know what all of her accolades are, but incredibly articulate lady, powerful woman.

[769] They're saying that her becoming the lieutenant governor is a victory for white supremacy.

[770] I read that.

[771] And she's a black woman.

[772] He's a black woman.

[773] When Larry Elder was running for governor of California, they said he's the black face of white supremacy.

[774] What?

[775] What are you saying?

[776] What the fuck are you?

[777] saying?

[778] Like, you could disagree with the man's politics, but that white supremacy is like a stamp they like to put on as many things as they can.

[779] Like, 15 % off.

[780] Yeah.

[781] It's like, well, dude, I'm sick of like, there's been this thing against white people like, I don't know.

[782] Here it is.

[783] Damn, showty out here, grinding, bro.

[784] This looks like a Donnell Rawlings character as well.

[785] Jamel Hill says it's not the messaging folks.

[786] This country simply loves white supremacy.

[787] And this is because of the victory in Virginia by the Republican Party.

[788] But the fucking governor of Virginia was doing a shitty job.

[789] The people voted.

[790] They didn't like him.

[791] They didn't understand what was going on with the way the school systems handling certain issues.

[792] Oh, yeah.

[793] Yeah.

[794] So winsome Sears.

[795] And what is her background?

[796] It's kind of fucked that she's holding a gun.

[797] And she doesn't have her finger in a proper position either.

[798] Actually, I'm What does it say?

[799] I'm glad she's not.

[800] She was in the middle.

[801] Oh, she was.

[802] She was a Jamaican in the Marine.

[803] So she's an immigrant.

[804] Oh, I like that.

[805] She said this country has done so much for me. I was willing to die for this country.

[806] Wow.

[807] She said, a Marine Corps veteran said in her speech.

[808] And she won Yonkin?

[809] Yeah.

[810] Yonkin is the man and she is the lieutenant governor.

[811] So she's like the, it's like the vice president.

[812] I love this.

[813] Amazing.

[814] Amazing.

[815] And a veteran and a Republican and an immigrant.

[816] And by the way, very few people are more anti -communist and anti -Marxist than people who've come from communist countries.

[817] You want to hear someone who's a fucking anti -Marxist, anti -communist, talk to someone who's been from Russia.

[818] Those fucking people, anybody who's been from the Eastern Europe, they don't want to hear none of that bullshit.

[819] They fucking, they're, they hate it.

[820] When you see these college kids talk about Marxism has never been done correctly, they're like, fuck you.

[821] Our country lost millions of people because of this shit.

[822] yeah i think we're getting it's definitely things that we're getting into this softer kind of world we're getting into this like um soft people are fucking things up yeah but do you think though this is a neat question for you joe i mean i think we'll see do you think though that we're like we're heading more towards like we're they're not going to need any muscle we're not going to need any i think so like when you see aliens like i remember one time we talked about aliens and, uh, there's, I don't know I think England are just people that just came back here to, it's just us.

[823] It could be.

[824] Because it's the heads are big, the bodies are nothing, they're just whittled away to nothing.

[825] We've talked about this before.

[826] If you go back, I remember you and I had this conversation, you go back and you, I say this all the time, too.

[827] If you go back and look at like early man, like Neanderthals, Neanderthals were like 5, 7, they were like 200 pounds.

[828] They're basically like me. Like you're Rajah Faber.

[829] Yeah.

[830] You're Raya Faber.

[831] Uriah Fabor, yeah.

[832] And no shade either.

[833] He's got the heaviest hands.

[834] You shake his hand?

[835] You can't stop shaking.

[836] It follows you home.

[837] That thing will fucking be, dude, that thing will be holding on to your wife and just, that dude's got a never -ending hand.

[838] That hand and that arm is an expert at strangling people.

[839] Yeah.

[840] He's one of the best guillotines of all time.

[841] Does he really?

[842] Oh, yeah.

[843] Oh, Yariah Favor is famous for his guillotine.

[844] He gets a hold that necks on.

[845] You got real problems.

[846] He's a guillotine master.

[847] There's certain moves that, like, some guys are just.

[848] is known for.

[849] Uriah Fabor is known for that guillotine.

[850] His whole team is, and a lot of it is because of Yariah.

[851] Wow.

[852] That team Alpha male from up north, north of Northern California, they're known for their guillotines, and I think a lot of it is because of Yariah.

[853] Dude, I won't even shake his fucking hand without putting a mitten on, dude.

[854] I need some support.

[855] Super good dude.

[856] Real solid guy, very smart.

[857] Yeah, he's got some beautiful children, too.

[858] Yeah.

[859] But anyway, the point is that if you go back and look at primitive man, they had all these muscles and they got smaller brains and then as people have become more and more intelligent their bodies are not necessary anymore in terms of like the ability to move things around and our heads have gotten bigger so if you look at bill gates right he's another example he's got like this body that's basically like a water balloon like there's no density to it all you you could stab him with your finger you could just fuck you you could probably kill him with a finger if you really want if you really doubled up two fingers and taped him I am very confident I could kill him with two fingers.

[860] You could at least make his heart skip a beat.

[861] If I just had time, I could just remix him just remix him to death.

[862] I think I could kill him with a thumb 100%.

[863] But I really think I could kill him with two fingers.

[864] Because a thumb, I'm most confident jabbing something with a thumb.

[865] Yeah, and your thumb has more of a base.

[866] It's going to put the pressure wider.

[867] Two fingers is harder, but I think if I taped them up, I think I can fuck him up with two fingers.

[868] If you took his fucking pulse harder enough, you could put him down.

[869] Yes.

[870] But the point is that I think if you looked at the natural progression of evolution of the primate animal it eventually becomes this thing with a big head and this tiny body and now what's fucking us up more than anything well war war murder rape theft the strong taking over and doing terrible things to the weaker right that's what we're really scared of when it comes to like barbarians and history you think about all the you know like the Vikings We think of like physical things taking over.

[871] Warlocks?

[872] Yeah, that's a little different.

[873] But my point is, what would be the best way to solve that?

[874] Well, no sex.

[875] What if they reproduce without sex?

[876] Aliens, that's one thing they say, they have no genitals, right?

[877] Yeah.

[878] You don't need it.

[879] What if they genetically engineer a human being to the point where they no longer need genitals, so now we don't have any of those fucked up instincts and emotions that have clouded our judgment and ruined society.

[880] Yeah, and maybe your head's giant and you could read each other's minds.

[881] So now there's no more confusion, so there's no naughty words and good words.

[882] There's no words that some people can say and some people can't.

[883] Because you're all reading thoughts.

[884] So it's just pure intent.

[885] I know exactly what you're thinking, you know exactly what I'm thinking, and we can relay information back and forth.

[886] So your mouth's not necessary.

[887] So you develop this little tiny -ass fucking hole for a mouth.

[888] basically no nose and your body is just basically like a thing that like moves your head around yeah right your body just has to have enough strength to move your head to another place so maybe if aliens came back to visit it's just like them it's like us going to a museum or something or drive with your old neighborhood you're like and I think maybe they don't come visit anymore because they're like fuck we're not going back to that shit hole you know what I'm saying or maybe they do drive by like you go by your old high school like those are the days yeah yeah but not that many of them I bet there used to be more and now they're like it's not even worth going there anymore Dude I spent I went down a rabbit hole last night What if we're right?

[889] It could be It could be the future I mean look I think that's the future of humans If we don't fuck things up I think we're eventually gonna look like that If we do or don't fuck things up If we don't fuck things up Or maybe if we do fuck things up Right But I mean if we don't fuck things up In terms of blowing up the earth Oh yeah But if we if we don't fuck things up And things continue to evolve and the way it's at now, I feel like that's where we're going.

[890] It seems, right?

[891] Well, rich people aren't even hanging out on the planet anymore.

[892] They're getting out of the solar system.

[893] They're going into space.

[894] Yeah.

[895] I mean, how obvious is it that the rest of us are down here?

[896] They're beating each other up at an Arby's and they're out there.

[897] They're fucking doing a damn tour in space.

[898] I know.

[899] Jeff Bezos has been to space.

[900] He took his brother.

[901] He's in the closet.

[902] He took William Shackner.

[903] Uh -uh.

[904] Yeah.

[905] He took Captain Kirk into space.

[906] How wild was that?

[907] I know I'm mostly from Rescue 9 -1 -1.

[908] Even that's insane, though.

[909] If you took the host of Rescue 9 -1 -1 in outer space?

[910] How the fuck do you not know him from Star Trek, bro?

[911] He's Captain Kirk.

[912] Yeah, but he's Captain Kirk.

[913] I believe you, but we didn't watch it, Joe.

[914] We watched Rescue 9 -1, and it was great.

[915] Wasn't he in another show?

[916] What other show was he on?

[917] He wasn't T .J. Hooker, right?

[918] No, I think he was in the commission.

[919] Was he in the commission?

[920] That was Lee Majors.

[921] the majors was the fall guy who was t j hooker i think the commish maybe no the commish was that dude who was in the bald guy who was in fantastic four he was the thing that's incredible i think you're thinking of michael chichlis he was the commish oh michael chichickles yeah he was also in that one show that was really good he's good what was that show there was a cop show that michael chickles was in oh oh the shield the shield I didn't see that.

[922] Shield was a good show.

[923] Remember, did you ever interview that guy?

[924] T .J. Hooker.

[925] So who's that?

[926] It's Shackner.

[927] Oh, wow.

[928] Look at him.

[929] Yeah, he was T .J. Look at that wig.

[930] Jesus.

[931] Is that a wig?

[932] All in.

[933] Oh, yeah.

[934] He went all in with that one.

[935] You don't think that's his real hair?

[936] Nope.

[937] No, it's definitely not.

[938] He's got great wigs, though.

[939] How good can a wig be?

[940] It can only be so good.

[941] You know, because if you're running and it gets sweaty, you're like, oh, my God, I wish I didn't have this thing.

[942] If you're wearing a wig, I don't think you're running anymore.

[943] though I think some things you got to let go don't you think I think so yeah the risk of running in a wig that should that'll be one of our last Olympic sports dude just put a good stiff freeze like a sail when it pops up and slows you down he was doing great until the wig popped up you can see just where it's setting back here Gil look at aliens no hair at all hairless because it's because it's unnecessary Unnecessary.

[944] And then, again, what fucks us up?

[945] The desire to be dominant because it's a part of the animal kingdom, which is how people select for breeding.

[946] Well, if we eliminate that totally, we don't have any need for generals and everybody looks the same.

[947] We also eliminate racism because everybody looks exactly the same.

[948] Bage power, dude.

[949] Right?

[950] There's no racism when you're gray.

[951] Oh, I think, looking back on, you can't even be racist now.

[952] Like, look at Ben Simmons, you can't even decide.

[953] You're like, do I, why don't I like him?

[954] You know, you're like, it's like, everything.

[955] Everybody's so mixed now, like, I feel like unless you have, like, a chart or you're willing to really graph something out, you can't really even fucking be racist anymore.

[956] Well, there's still people hanging in there.

[957] There's still people holding on to that old school racism.

[958] Yeah, there's still a few, especially down south.

[959] But how many, though?

[960] Maybe a couple hundred?

[961] Not as many as they used to be.

[962] But when they come out, man, boy, they make a big deal out of it.

[963] Oh, they, with those cheeky torch guys in Virginia, remember, that's fucking idiots.

[964] That was the thing that was going on.

[965] during this Yonkin election, they had like a fake Tiki Torch thing.

[966] They did it as like a joke and one of them was a black guy that came with the Tiki Torches.

[967] And they were all pointing to those people saying, see, these are the people that are supporting Yonkin.

[968] And then everyone's like, you fucking idiots, you just got trolled.

[969] Right.

[970] Like this is fake.

[971] Well, you can troll the news all the time.

[972] Look at Tim Dillon.

[973] I mean, that's it.

[974] Like, you know, he's so great at it.

[975] Yeah, he did one recently with the Southwest pilots.

[976] Oh, I saw that.

[977] So good.

[978] He's the best.

[979] Tim Dillon is a national treasure.

[980] Tim Dillon is a national treasure, man. He's so important to comedy.

[981] We got to put him in a museum, dude.

[982] Protect Tim Dillon at all costs.

[983] When he got COVID, I was panicking.

[984] Really?

[985] Oh, yeah, because he's a little thicker, huh?

[986] Well, he's a little big.

[987] Yeah, we took care of him.

[988] And he knows it.

[989] We're not talking out of shop.

[990] No, he loves it.

[991] But he's so important for comedy.

[992] Because he's just like, he's the best, in my opinion.

[993] And just fucking flat out ranting about the news.

[994] Just ranting.

[995] You know, like, he, like, because he has Ben, his producer who sits next to him.

[996] He has, like, a one -person audience.

[997] Yeah.

[998] So he just rants, you know?

[999] And it's like, his take on things is so absurd.

[1000] Yours is, too.

[1001] You're going a pretty absurd take on things, too.

[1002] But you're doing your shit solo.

[1003] Yeah.

[1004] I think maybe you need to bring in a producer or someone to crack up sitting next to you.

[1005] What do you think?

[1006] Yeah, I would like some help.

[1007] but they might get annoying yeah I think maybe that's tough I had a little Vietnamese fellow for a little while but it wasn't a good fit I think I think I gotta Does that mean about the war No I mean You know people have different views on that I don't know what side you're on but He didn't chime about that He'd never masturbated this guy He was born a green Christian or double Reborn or whatever I don't know what it is I have a hard time believe in that Did he fuck pillows at least.

[1008] Oh, you could look in his eyes and see nothing ever come out of him, dude.

[1009] Nothing ever?

[1010] Bro, you could pat him on the back and hear the cum rattling him.

[1011] Wow.

[1012] I mean, the dude was full.

[1013] I read the most confusing thing the other day.

[1014] But yeah, I'd like to find somebody.

[1015] Sorry.

[1016] I'm going to send this.

[1017] Oh, yeah, you should.

[1018] I'm going to send this to you, Jamie.

[1019] Yeah.

[1020] Yeah.

[1021] If you want more, whatever you need.

[1022] I'm scared about what's in everything in here now.

[1023] In here?

[1024] Just in the world, man. I feel like everything could be dosed, laced, who knows, man?

[1025] Well, it's not going to be here don't worry about that okay thank you guys we're taking care of shit i can't find it but it was uh some yeah but what if we don't have say a lot of people are going to be pissed the day they're like hey we're not have you no more sex people say that but what if there's a thing that you do with your mind that's way better than sex right this is why they're going to get people to have no sex if they can like you know Elon is doing this thing called neuralink do you have heard of this yeah right so it's going to be some sort of of a quarter -sized thing they screw in your fucking head and a bunch of wires in there that lets you download information quicker are you gonna be able to talk with no words that's his exact words to me probably use your phone on a plane a bet oh yeah well i think you can now why it's hard though it takes fucking it's a wifi better yeah they'll get it better yeah what was my point sorry go ahead so neuralink you said what did i say before that um you said so they're gonna have no sex we don't have to have any sex so if If they get past this neural length thing, and it evolves and gets better and better, instead of just being able to talk with no words, you'll be able to, like, combine souls.

[1026] You'll be able to, like, reach into someone's mind and embrace them.

[1027] You can be able to have orgasms on command anytime you want.

[1028] You'll be able to be in a state of bliss and love constantly, where you never have anger and frustration, you never have road rage, you never pissed off at people for something to happen 10 years ago.

[1029] There's none of that.

[1030] You just bliss and enlightenment.

[1031] all the time.

[1032] Who wouldn't take that?

[1033] Why do you want to live in struggle?

[1034] You want to be angry?

[1035] You want to be filled with anxiety all the time?

[1036] There would be holdouts.

[1037] I'd probably I would for a couple months I'd be a holdout I would wait.

[1038] Yeah.

[1039] I would be a late adopter sort of like I'm waiting with the vaccine.

[1040] Yeah.

[1041] You're like I don't know, we'll see.

[1042] Let's see how it shakes out.

[1043] I've been down this road before.

[1044] But you mean you could be at a party and just your wife's just ejaculating and you don't know who did it in the room like that kind of thing?

[1045] Well no one's going to touch her so right but still it would be almost like a game of guess who?

[1046] Would you be upset if you were married and your wife had a mind meld with another person?

[1047] Well, you say, yeah, if it was a man, but what if it was a woman?

[1048] What if nobody has a dick?

[1049] What if there are no dicks?

[1050] See what I'm saying?

[1051] I see.

[1052] So there's no physical actual thing.

[1053] She's just having some experience.

[1054] No one has genitals.

[1055] It's just porn built into you.

[1056] Yeah.

[1057] If you look at the aliens, no one has genitals.

[1058] Fuck.

[1059] Maybe that's our future.

[1060] No tits.

[1061] No dicks No vaginas Are there some drawing Maybe we're just seeing drawings With aliens with no gen?

[1062] Are we Are there some With big dicks Yeah Some of aliens with hogs Somebody told me Black people and aliens Don't get along I remember hearing that Dude like seven years ago Somebody told me that Who fucking told you that Two black dudes At a freaking You know where it was At that casino Out near Palm Springs Oh that's a deadly casino One of the First ever alien abduction Cases was a black man And his wife Betty and Barnes And here's what's crazy.

[1063] I am friends with Barney Hill's granddaughter.

[1064] She fights in the UFC, Angela Hill.

[1065] She fights...

[1066] Oh, yeah.

[1067] I've watched her fight.

[1068] Yeah.

[1069] Angela Hill's a beast.

[1070] Yeah.

[1071] She fights in the UFC, and when she was on the podcast, she didn't even tell me to the podcast was over.

[1072] And then when it was over, she goes, oh, I forgot to tell you, my grandfather is Barney Hill.

[1073] And I was like, what?

[1074] And I was like, next podcast.

[1075] We're getting into that.

[1076] Yeah.

[1077] Like when I do a second podcast with her, we'll talk about that.

[1078] is that is a crazy story.

[1079] Her grandfather was the, it was the first ever, like, widely publicized abduction story.

[1080] And they were driving down a road and there was some light above the car and then they woke up hours later.

[1081] I think that's the story.

[1082] And they, they had to be, they had to remember what happened.

[1083] Like, their brains were somehow scrambled.

[1084] But separately, they both had.

[1085] the exact same vision of what it was.

[1086] Now, people are super skeptical about this, and I think they were hypnotized, hypnotic regression, but something clearly had happened to them.

[1087] They were missing time, and this story was that they were taken aboard this spacecraft.

[1088] And it was one of the very first stories about these kind of creatures, these small, kind of frail creatures, which with large heads that had abducted them.

[1089] Damn, it's wild, man. Like the thing is like they weren't liars.

[1090] It's not like if you talk to some person in the, oh, and I also saw Bigfoot.

[1091] And I also, I know where the locks, no, it's monster sleeps, you know, but that's not the case.

[1092] These were like respectable, like members of society.

[1093] They weren't liars.

[1094] They weren't criminals.

[1095] And they had this story.

[1096] And this is only one story they had their whole life.

[1097] And they never changed the way they talked about it.

[1098] Right.

[1099] So when people have that, it doesn't mean necessarily that that's what really happened to them.

[1100] But man, it's like, it's hard to ignore when you've had so many people that have the same kind of story.

[1101] It's hard to ignore.

[1102] And black people have been through so much to go with the alien story is a brave thing.

[1103] It would be like a, you know what I'm saying?

[1104] When everybody else is kind of going with like more black rights and that kind of thing.

[1105] And you're going to say, I'm going to do this is what's happening.

[1106] Like that would be.

[1107] And also it probably be scary to say I got to like, what if people think like, you know, some white people probably thought, that's only for whites.

[1108] Well, this was actually an interracial couple.

[1109] Betty and Barney Hill.

[1110] So they were bold in that sense, too, because in the 1950s, to be a married interracial couple, they probably dealt with a bunch of bullshit.

[1111] Wow.

[1112] But it's a wild story.

[1113] And Angela Hill, that's her grandfather.

[1114] That's crazy.

[1115] I don't know how much she talked to him about it or how much she knows about it.

[1116] That's crazy, man. Damn, yeah.

[1117] I wonder if he wrote a book or anything, did he?

[1118] Well, he definitely gave a lot of interviews about it and talked about it.

[1119] Like, see if you can find something on it.

[1120] It's pretty interesting.

[1121] Like, see if you can find a video of Barney Hill talking about his case.

[1122] When he talks about it, man, you know, it's so hard to tell when you watch a video because some people are just really good at lying.

[1123] Yeah.

[1124] You could say, oh, I could tell, man. He's telling the truth, but I don't think you can.

[1125] I think some people, they're just real crazy and they're good at lying.

[1126] I'll probably miss getting off, though, I bet.

[1127] You think you'll have one last little, like it would be like a book burner where everybody shows up and busts out one more time.

[1128] Yeah, one more times.

[1129] for old time's sake i think it'll be our great great grandchildren that have no genitals i don't think it'll be us no no no yeah not us it'll be more of a they do it at birth yeah but there'll be like a countdown like a new year's everybody does one last freaking hurrah off the cliff or something two one yeah yeah maybe dude i remember right remember you remember the first time you could ever ejaculate or no i'm trying i don't think i remember the first time i ever ejaculate what You're not, bro.

[1130] Well, I had sex before I ever masturbated.

[1131] Oh.

[1132] Yeah.

[1133] I started masturbating after I had sex.

[1134] No way, man. I don't know if that happens to a lot of people.

[1135] That doesn't.

[1136] I think it's pretty rare.

[1137] Oh, my God, dude.

[1138] And then after I had a girlfriend and started fooling around, then I realized, like, how dependent on her I was for that feeling, for sex.

[1139] Because, you know, when you're 15, 16 years old, like, you are so horny.

[1140] like all the time it's like you're aching it's horrific do you remember those days yeah dude you get those steel boners that just controlled your life like a compass due north I remember opening my pants to pee and I would hear bro peeing out of a bone or just hot peeding sideways in a freaking thing just to you would have to pull your hand on the wall and bend towards it like you're fucking and then try to hold yourself up with one hand and push your boner down with your other hand.

[1141] Yeah, like push it down.

[1142] Like you're trying to force a drunk out of a bar.

[1143] Dude, I remember when I can first ejaculate, I remember they had this lady.

[1144] I'd go outside in the morning, so I'm going to jerk off outside.

[1145] And they had this lady that would walk these two dogs, right?

[1146] And so the, because I remember seeing on Nature Channel where if there's urine or animal semen, like some animals won't, it's like territory.

[1147] Right.

[1148] So I remember, she'd walk these two dogs and I would do it in like different spots to see if the animal, like what they would do, like a reaction.

[1149] And the little one would go over there and the big one would never even...

[1150] Really?

[1151] Yeah, it was like the little one I guess almost felt like...

[1152] He was a cuck.

[1153] Yeah, yeah, maybe a little one's over there.

[1154] You might go over to sniff your loads.

[1155] But the big one didn't want that smoke, baby.

[1156] You didn't want that of it, dude.

[1157] But I remember that, dude.

[1158] Yeah, it was so exciting.

[1159] I remember, here's one thing I do really, really, uh, recollect emotionally was that I had this thing that made me feel good, I could feel good whenever I wanted to.

[1160] And that was a huge thing for me. Yeah.

[1161] Like if I was having a horrible day or I was thinking, you know, was not feeling good about myself, which was a lot as a kid, I could come home and I could bust one and make my, it was suddenly I had control over how I felt.

[1162] Right.

[1163] And it was the only way to do it.

[1164] And it was this, uh, which is probably not a great way to establish feeling decent, you know?

[1165] But suddenly I had that little decent stick on me. You know what?

[1166] I used it for a sleeping pill.

[1167] It was great.

[1168] If I couldn't sleep, whack one off.

[1169] I could see that for you.

[1170] Out cold.

[1171] I could see that for you.

[1172] I'm like, here we go.

[1173] Like, if I need to take a nap and I know I only have like an hour, I'm like, well, 15 minutes of it would be me beating off.

[1174] And then I'll definitely get that 45 in.

[1175] Otherwise, I'm laying there.

[1176] For a fucking 35 minutes going, if I go to sleep now, I get 15 minutes.

[1177] Shit, if I go to sleep now, I can sleep for 10 minutes.

[1178] I'm a bust a nut.

[1179] Then I'm going to sleep right away.

[1180] There's no if -ans or butts.

[1181] I'm snoring.

[1182] I'm sucking on my own tongue at that point.

[1183] Yeah, I remember that shit was fun, dude.

[1184] It was fun being just the bust were just like, oh, beautiful.

[1185] I remember when I was.

[1186] 16 years old.

[1187] It was like one of the first times a girl had ever given me a blowjob.

[1188] Scroarles dating gave me a blow job.

[1189] And I came outside on a porch.

[1190] Yep.

[1191] At nighttime.

[1192] Scarl was dating.

[1193] And I came so hard, my ears rang.

[1194] The only time in my life, it was like, be.

[1195] And I was lightheaded.

[1196] I was like, Jesus.

[1197] Because those were like 16 -year -old cum shots?

[1198] That's a different thing.

[1199] when you've been just storing it up for a few weeks it was like watching the like those guys who go off that thing on the Olympics it was like that too just skiers yeah oh man that was fun dude you know what's really crazy is that you think about the difference between being 11 12 and then 13 14 15 16 in just five years your desire, like what you want to do with the world changes 100%.

[1200] All of a sudden you've got all these crazy hormones in your system.

[1201] You're confused.

[1202] You're hard all the time.

[1203] Like you get boners in class all the time I'd have to pull out my shirt.

[1204] Like if you sat down too long, you would get a boner.

[1205] We have to walk up to the board backwards and shit.

[1206] Oh my God.

[1207] Or you would tuck it into like the top.

[1208] Yeah.

[1209] It's almost like you'd be poking out of the top of your underwear.

[1210] Wear a Lamage shirt from your stepmom?

[1211] If you have a hard on and it's like this, you've got a problem.

[1212] But if you take it and you put it like that...

[1213] You lock it in.

[1214] Lock it in with the rubber from the underwear band.

[1215] And it's like he's poking out of the top and put the clothes over it.

[1216] You're like, ooh, nothing to see here.

[1217] Put it in that hard scarf, baby.

[1218] You know what I'm saying?

[1219] That's your next invention.

[1220] Joe Rogan's teenage boner lock underwear.

[1221] Do you know Elvis had a boner in a movie?

[1222] There was a movie, I believe it.

[1223] Something, some movie with women, I forget what it's called, women are in the title.

[1224] But there's a scene where Elvis is with this girl, and she's pretty fucking hot.

[1225] And Elvis is, like, dancing with her, and he's got a full rod.

[1226] Like, it's poking out of his pants, and they left it in there.

[1227] Damn.

[1228] They didn't even cut around it.

[1229] So when I get real excited, even still, I'll grab my penis and squeeze it.

[1230] Do you ever do that?

[1231] When it's hard or soft?

[1232] When it's soft.

[1233] You just grab it?

[1234] Yeah, like it makes me. bitch no it's just like you saying like yeah let me think I don't like to squeeze it when it's soft it hurts yeah make you feel kind of fired up so Elvis in this scene yeah the walls have ears that's look at that got a full damn back that up a little bit daddy running that rod out there watch this as he moves watch this watch this right there bro he's got a boner that's that 11 pound test he's got going on look at she backs her her her vagina back like yes she really that something's going on there immediately bro women were different back then no one worked out oh well it's like if you go to like Europe now it's like it's almost like they don't have a lot of gyms and stuff really yeah oh italy i noticed that yeah you go to italy their gyms are bullshit like where the fuck of your weights it's like a pizzerie every every gym they're just serving pizza people eating pizza like yeah they had like one of these cable machines the cables were fucked up i was trying to chips off of it it just got cable it was like a direct TV you're just watching the shows they had one treadmill and this is like a nice place I was staying at that's me yeah that's maybe it's just Italy I thought it was maybe in France too but yeah I realized that when I was in Europe one time I said damn they don't really have they're not doing they're not as a concern with like the appearance of the fitness you know I just don't think it's part of the culture the culture is about eating and drinking wine and relaxing and having fun and they have a different view on things I don't know what's better or work but they seem to have a more relaxed take on things and their food's better so maybe they're right well our food is all stressed out you know I think even the meat you get is stressed and I was thinking about this the other day dude anybody like the other day I had a steak like on a Tuesday or something dude like steak used to be like remember steak was for yeah I remember the first time I saw a steak I think I was 19 or 22 years old first time I saw a steak right yeah we didn't we didn't have a steak Right.

[1235] And if you did, it was like a bullshit steak.

[1236] If we did, it was off somebody, you know, somebody down the street was fucking slaying something.

[1237] It could have been fucking part of their wife, dude, who knows.

[1238] But now people are having steak on a, somebody, you know, somebody like gets an A on a test.

[1239] They're having it.

[1240] Like, it used to be steak was for somebody who had done something.

[1241] Yes, it was a celebratory thing.

[1242] Yeah, now it's like.

[1243] Like people would say, I'll teach you to a steak dinner.

[1244] Yes.

[1245] Yeah.

[1246] Steak dinner was like a big deal.

[1247] Dang, like I had steak yesterday.

[1248] We had steak.

[1249] Everybody, it just, there's no, the rewards.

[1250] There's, it's like, the rewards are on Tuesdays now.

[1251] It's like.

[1252] Yeah, my kids are like steak again, like, yeah.

[1253] Do you understand this is the best food, the most nutritious food, most nutrient -dense food?

[1254] Fuck all that propaganda.

[1255] And that was a diet where people only eat steak.

[1256] Oh, yeah, Jordan Peterson was on it, wasn't he?

[1257] Yeah, he's still on it.

[1258] Damn.

[1259] He's still on it.

[1260] I don't know.

[1261] I've tried it.

[1262] diet i don't know maybe i haven't tried that well that's what it is that's all steak diet they're just eating steak jordan just has steak and salt and water that's it damn he even gets his blood work done he's okay you know yeah i just got on some uh what did i get on oh probiotics oh and that's really been helping me yeah dude i got like about a year and a half ago i got so or maybe tears got so angry maybe it was during the pandemic i don't know what it was it was like i was dealing with all this stress stress and anger i couldn't deal with it you might even i remember i saw you at um i think it was at the improv and i had to cancel some shows one weekend yeah and i said hey do you think i should and he said no i don't think you should but i had to care there's just nothing i could i was just like you were having anxiety too i think i was yeah i was just burnt out yeah yeah yeah i remember you were confused about it but here's the things like You always love doing shows.

[1263] So if there's a time where you don't want to do shows, like there's got to be something legitimately wrong.

[1264] Yeah.

[1265] You know?

[1266] Yeah, that's what I realized.

[1267] That something was going on.

[1268] I didn't know what it was.

[1269] A lot of it was anger, man. Anger at what?

[1270] I don't know.

[1271] Nothing?

[1272] No specific reason?

[1273] I tried, I mean, I tried like, I've just done a ton of yoga.

[1274] Oh, yeah?

[1275] Yeah.

[1276] Isn't that amazing for, like, relieving anger?

[1277] Oh.

[1278] He was so peaceful after you get out of there.

[1279] Yoga meditation I try the ketamine Oh you do the nasal spray No I did the shoot a month Oh did you really?

[1280] You do the IV?

[1281] Yeah You went to a doctor six sessions yeah with a therapist in the room Did you trip balls?

[1282] Bro I thought it Talk to me There was a moment no joke Where I thought it was a tonsil There was a time where I thought it was a tonsil A tonsil maybe you are You know yeah totally I wouldn't be shocked Maybe we're all cells in a tonsil.

[1283] Because you know how like an atom, if you think of an atom, most of it is like empty space, right?

[1284] Yeah, just like a solar system.

[1285] Right.

[1286] Maybe that's like the whole universe is like an atom.

[1287] Oh, I wouldn't be shocked by that.

[1288] And you really are an atom and a tonsil.

[1289] But the reveal on that wouldn't be.

[1290] I need something dark.

[1291] I need something more than that.

[1292] So when you thought you were a tonsil, tell me what the experience was like.

[1293] Okay.

[1294] So they put you in the thing.

[1295] You're sitting there in the chair and then suddenly like, um, You have your eyes closed and you're talking with a therapist the whole time during this place.

[1296] Is he talking too much?

[1297] No. Is he like me?

[1298] No, I don't think you, I'm glad you talk because I don't, it's hard for me. The most I've ever talked to my life is a couple times than you ever.

[1299] Like if I'd had even one of the conversations I'd have with you with my father total, then I'd probably be a different human.

[1300] Bro, you know what's hilarious?

[1301] I know, right?

[1302] If I had those conversations with my father, I probably wouldn't be having it.

[1303] with the rest of the world.

[1304] That's crazy?

[1305] My whole life, dude, I swear to God.

[1306] My parents always told me I talk too much.

[1307] Really?

[1308] Yeah, like, you talk too much.

[1309] But, like, asking all these questions.

[1310] I was always curious.

[1311] And they're like, we shut the fuck up.

[1312] Like, you talk too much.

[1313] Yeah.

[1314] I was always like, what is this?

[1315] And why do you do that?

[1316] Who fuck is wants, why does anybody want that?

[1317] I always wanted to keep talking.

[1318] I wanted to keep people awake.

[1319] Like, wake up.

[1320] Come on, we're going to keep talking.

[1321] Really?

[1322] And everybody was like, you talk too much.

[1323] And then it became what I do.

[1324] do.

[1325] It's kind of crazy.

[1326] It's kind of crazy.

[1327] But did you know people?

[1328] So you remember people saying you talk too much?

[1329] A hundred percent.

[1330] I was annoying.

[1331] Wow, because I know people that are like that.

[1332] That was me. That's funny.

[1333] I hadn't thought of you like that.

[1334] Maybe it's because it's been presented to me. Well, I polished it up.

[1335] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[1336] There you go.

[1337] You know, it's like you got a kid who's got a lot of wild energy, but then you teach him martial arts and then that kid becomes like really good at martial arts, he polished it up.

[1338] Well, it reminds me, Dustin Porte, he used to fight dudes in his town in front of the police station because he knew they were going to get arrested.

[1339] So he would meet him there to fight.

[1340] Perfect.

[1341] He's such a nice guy.

[1342] He's like, we're going to be in here anyway.

[1343] Let's meet right over here.

[1344] That's a good move.

[1345] But then he polished it up.

[1346] Yeah, he polished it up, and now he's a world champion.

[1347] Yeah.

[1348] That's what it is.

[1349] There you are.

[1350] And now you're a world champion.

[1351] In a way, yeah, I'm in podcasting.

[1352] You're certainly a, yeah, you certainly are.

[1353] That's commendable.

[1354] Wow, it's interesting.

[1355] So tell me about this ketamine.

[1356] Okay, so you go in, you're sitting in the chair, and then you start to close your eyes, and you start to...

[1357] So they give you an IV?

[1358] Ivy, yeah.

[1359] And how big is the bag?

[1360] It's like a regular Ivy bag, the whole deal?

[1361] Yeah, first couple sessions, they let you, they see how you're going to do.

[1362] They want to make sure you're not going to freak.

[1363] Yeah, you'll pull the cord out of your arm, grab the docks, eat of your music.

[1364] Oh, I go in there wearing all army fatigues and shit.

[1365] They're like, this ain't going to go well.

[1366] A fucking football paint under your eyes.

[1367] with the Aaron Rogers jersey on Shout out to Aaron Rogers Well, he has time to listen this weekend He does, there you go Well, if he stays off Twitter That's true, huh?

[1368] He might get caught up in the hate Oh, he's a white Kyrie Irving, dude, good for him Well, Kyrie Irving's not getting nearly the hate that he is That's true He's getting a lot of hate today It's interesting Yeah, I did notice that even last night They were talking about it on TV These two complete nerds were talking about Aaron Rogers I'm like, you guys couldn't even Here's the thing about Aaron Rogers.

[1369] I could say this now because he's gone through this whole thing.

[1370] He's allergic to one of the main ingredients in the vaccine.

[1371] Oh, really?

[1372] Yeah, there's an ingredient that's in the capsule.

[1373] And I hope I'm not doing any disservice to him because he told me this in confidence.

[1374] He told me this, but this is people need to know this.

[1375] He's not vaccine hesitant because he's like a conspiracy theorist.

[1376] There's a, what is the ingredient?

[1377] ingredient propylethylene glycol some shit I don't remember the actual term for it but he has a reaction to it he has a legit allergy to this stuff and it's in shampoos it's a it's a commonly used chemical yeah and he has a legit allergy to this commonly used chemical yeah it looks oily actually maybe that's why maybe wash my brother's highly allergic to sesame seeds yeah I love him I've never heard that I've heard peanuts and Yeah, me too Brian Cowan's mom Can't even touch a Brazil nut Really?

[1378] Damn, she licks a Brazil nut She falls down like a fucking timber Man, why ain't taking her to Rio?

[1379] You know what I'm saying?

[1380] Dude, I'll say that, bro, that's for sure.

[1381] Propylene glycol, is that what it's called?

[1382] Yeah, that's it.

[1383] Aaron Rogers is allergic to that.

[1384] So if he did get injected with the vaccine, is highly likely that he would have an adverse reaction, an allergic reaction.

[1385] And see, this is a thing about vaccines and all kinds of medications and even all kinds of foods like you and I can eat Brazil nuts no problem right Brian's mom eats it she's dead right so if there's three people in a room and two of them are you and one of them is Brian's mom you know we could all eat Brazil nuts you and I will be fine but like what's the big deal just take your Brazil nut take it for society yeah eat your Brazil nut meanwhile she's dead this is a thing the CDC's website says if you have an allergic allergic reaction anything in it say if you're not if you're allergic to an ingredient in COVID -19 vaccine, if you have had a severe allergic reaction or an immediate allergic reaction, even if it was not severe, to any ingredient in the MRNA COVID -19 vaccine, you should not get either of the currently available MRNA COVID -19 vaccines.

[1386] By the way, the way I said that loud, it's because it's bold.

[1387] It's in bold type on the CDC website.

[1388] It says Pfizer, BioN Tech, and Moderna.

[1389] If you have had a severe allergic reaction or an immediate allergic reaction to any ingredient in the Johnson Johnson vaccine, and it says in all bold, you should not get the J &J Jansen vaccine.

[1390] So he's literally following the CDC's recommendations on their website.

[1391] He's not a dummy.

[1392] He's a fucking smart dude.

[1393] The reason why he hasn't gotten vaccinated is he has a legitimate allergy to one of the ingredients in the vaccine.

[1394] Yeah.

[1395] And some people could and don't know it also.

[1396] I mean, yeah, I think maybe, what do you do?

[1397] Do you start a league for people that aren't vaccinated then, do you think?

[1398] No, man. You fucking give them the goddamn monoclonal antibodies when they get sick and they get better quick.

[1399] I agree.

[1400] And then they have antibodies like you do, which makes you more resilient to the virus in the future.

[1401] I'm upstairs, maybe.

[1402] I'm here.

[1403] I think the problem with this is there's like a one level approach.

[1404] Right.

[1405] People only look at it one way.

[1406] You got to get vaccinated.

[1407] They're not looking at it in that, like, maybe we should expand treatment.

[1408] Maybe we should look at all these other treatments and find out what's the most effective.

[1409] And that monoclonal antibodies is insanely effective.

[1410] Well, mainstream media hooked themselves so much to these original things, I think, because they also have advertisers attached and stuff.

[1411] Brought to you by Pfizer.

[1412] I know.

[1413] Isn't that crazy?

[1414] Anderson Cooper, brought to you by Pfizer.

[1415] Don Lemon, brought to you by Pfizer.

[1416] When you see that ad, the fucking compilation of all the brought to you by Pfizer, it's on my Instagram.

[1417] Dude, I'm blacker than Don Lemon, dude.

[1418] Let's be realistic, though.

[1419] You might be.

[1420] Let's be realistic.

[1421] Let that hang there.

[1422] It's a little dead silence.

[1423] Let it, bro.

[1424] Let that mill around.

[1425] So let me just...

[1426] You're definitely more respected on the streets.

[1427] Huh?

[1428] You definitely more respected on the streets.

[1429] That's what I'm saying, dude.

[1430] A hundred percent.

[1431] That's what I'm saying, bro.

[1432] I've been...

[1433] Dude, I got deadled by a black guy when I was growing up, dude.

[1434] Congratulations.

[1435] Thank you.

[1436] How was it?

[1437] I didn't...

[1438] You know, I didn't have any, I mean, it was, you know, we were kids, you know what I'm saying?

[1439] It was like it wasn't, it wasn't invasive in the back.

[1440] It was just front, but it was, you know, so that's different.

[1441] It's weird when somebody goes into your body.

[1442] It is different.

[1443] Or it puts your body into them.

[1444] That's different.

[1445] Yeah, that didn't happen.

[1446] This man was just doing odd things.

[1447] Yeah, it is.

[1448] He kept picking us up and down by our, trying to pick us up and down by our penis.

[1449] He's like, I'm going to pick you up by your penis kind of.

[1450] And he would just like pick his, like, just like an.

[1451] inch like it was like a joke I'm talking about right yeah so then in the end he just let you down right you up again so he's just touching your pain yeah yeah he like hey he was trying to find out who gets hard yeah he was you got hard he'd like I got one and I didn't I didn't it's like fishing yeah you know you cast a lot of lines out there most of them you don't get a bite but every now and then you get that little stuff on the yeah you get something on the line you get that drag pulling dude remember that took you fetch you remember that story you told me that time oh yeah Well, he didn't take me fishing.

[1452] He actually used to jog around the lake while we fished and became friends with us.

[1453] And then I was 13 years old, 12 or 13.

[1454] I think I was 13.

[1455] And he said to me one day, I'll never forget this.

[1456] He goes, you know I love you, right?

[1457] And I was a little odd.

[1458] It was a little odd because he was drunk.

[1459] And we were at a particular part of this pond.

[1460] There was no one around.

[1461] There was like this main pond.

[1462] It's called Jamaica Pond.

[1463] It's in Jamaica Plain.

[1464] New York?

[1465] No. Boston and Jamaica Plains like a part of Boston and there's this one pond that we would go fishing at all the time me and my friend Josh and this dude used to come by and say hi to us and he used to be a school teacher and he got fired yeah he was trying to explain how he got fired I mean it's like that people didn't understand him and this and that but really was he was fucking kids he was chervin out he was pervin out oh and he said to me that he loved me and I remember thinking and, you know, like, where is this going?

[1466] And he was drunk, too.

[1467] And did you believe that he loved you or not?

[1468] I was confused, because I was like, something feels wrong.

[1469] And y 'all didn't know each other that well.

[1470] We knew each other, like, friendly.

[1471] Like, he would come by and talk.

[1472] He would hang out, you know.

[1473] I'd actually been to his house before.

[1474] Oh, yeah, I remember you told me that.

[1475] Really kind of scary now that I think, stop and think about it.

[1476] It was the wrong dude.

[1477] You know, I was 13.

[1478] When you're 13, you're fucking dumb.

[1479] You know, and then he...

[1480] Or you're trusting.

[1481] Exactly.

[1482] I was trusting because he was a smart guy.

[1483] He was very smart because he was in the Korean.

[1484] and he was talking to me about the Korean War and he would tell you about, you know, what it was like to serve and he watched a guy back into a propeller.

[1485] I remember he told him that.

[1486] His name was Walter.

[1487] He watched the guy back.

[1488] And he didn't yell or anything.

[1489] He's telling him to stop?

[1490] I don't think, you know, it's wha -ha -the -guy -up.

[1491] And he backed into a propeller and just got his fucking head obliterated.

[1492] That was it.

[1493] Just spray and done, dead.

[1494] I'm just reading that book by that guy.

[1495] Who's a guy that shot Bin Laden that was part of that group?

[1496] I don't know his name, but I know he's talking about.

[1497] It's pretty interesting.

[1498] I didn't ever know so much about like buds and like Navy SEAL program and stuff.

[1499] But his story like goes, it's interesting all the through it.

[1500] Anyway, go on.

[1501] So yeah, that was kind of.

[1502] So he told me you love me. And I was like real confused.

[1503] And I think I said, I like you too or something like that.

[1504] And he goes, you can't be love without sex.

[1505] I remember you saying that.

[1506] And then I remember I'm reeling in my line and I had a knife in my pocket.

[1507] I put my hand on my knife.

[1508] And I said, get the fuck away from me. And I said, leave me alone.

[1509] And he's like, you're reacting to this the wrong way.

[1510] You're overreact.

[1511] I'm like, leave me the fuck alone.

[1512] And luckily, he left me the fuck alone.

[1513] Wow.

[1514] But he was a grown man and I was a small kid.

[1515] I could have been.

[1516] Were you tough, though?

[1517] No. No, not at all.

[1518] No, when I was 13, I wasn't tough at all.

[1519] You were pretty handsome now.

[1520] I remember seeing pictures of him.

[1521] I was boy cute.

[1522] But it was one of those things.

[1523] You could have been in a boy band.

[1524] You could have been in a violent boy band.

[1525] I became tough because I was, scared like that I learned how to fight because I was nervous and because we moved around a lot and when I moved to a new high school like my first year of high school was I was in a new neighborhood yeah and so I was the kid that got picked on and I wasn't a big kid and so they fuck with me and I didn't know how to fight so I was like god damn it I need to learn how to do martial arts and then I started doing martial arts and I became obsessed and so I became what I was afraid of interesting man that's an interesting concept for people to take away I think yeah to trying a way to become what you're afraid of.

[1526] Well, that's what I was afraid of.

[1527] It was someone who actually knew how to fight.

[1528] Right.

[1529] So I became that.

[1530] Yeah.

[1531] Yeah.

[1532] And it alleviated that feeling completely.

[1533] That was the wildest thing.

[1534] Like, I was always worried about being picked on, and it just alleviated that.

[1535] Yeah.

[1536] I remember who led you into it, though?

[1537] Was there a person that first said, hey, Joe, get you up over here, you know?

[1538] No, it was me. I knew I needed to learn how to do martial arts.

[1539] I just, I needed to learn how to fight.

[1540] Was it boxing or martial arts?

[1541] Boxing or martial arts?

[1542] Was there like a, was it?

[1543] Well, I started with, I did kung fu a little bit when I was a kid, but I didn't really stick with it.

[1544] But then I did karate when I was 14, and then I went from karate to Taekwondo.

[1545] And I also did wrestling.

[1546] I wrestled for a season.

[1547] But I couldn't wrestle and do Taekwondo at the same time.

[1548] And I had a, I had like a natural ability at Taekwondo.

[1549] There was something about hitting people that I was good at.

[1550] Oh, that's cool.

[1551] Yeah.

[1552] Yeah, because I'll go to some classes at the National MMA sometimes, and it makes me feel like part of a group.

[1553] It makes you feel more capable a little bit.

[1554] A lot of camaraderie.

[1555] Yeah.

[1556] It's like it feels, there's an alleviation of pressure when you're done working out that's like nothing else.

[1557] Like that you feel so good after it's over.

[1558] You feel so peaceful and relaxed.

[1559] And even surviving, like just grappling with somebody for like a few minutes and surviving through that, even if nobody beat any, it's like, you're like, fuck, yeah, I made it.

[1560] Wow.

[1561] Okay, so like I can at least, it just takes some of the little fears.

[1562] away just a little bit at a time.

[1563] Yeah, and it's also great at alleviating stress.

[1564] Because it's controlled chaos, right?

[1565] It's like controlled aggression and controlled, like, there's a lot of fear because you might get tapped, you might get strangled.

[1566] So there's like this struggle, but it's controlled struggle.

[1567] Yeah.

[1568] And then it's after it's over, he's just so peaceful.

[1569] Like, guys who do jujitsu all the time are some of the nicest fucking people I know.

[1570] Like, some of my nicest friends are friends that do jujitsu.

[1571] Oh yeah They're so friendly They're so kind Yeah Some of the most interesting people I've met man Are dude Dude it's funny Because I'll go into this place And just because I know you People are like I'm like Dude I don't know anything Like I was like People are kicking me In the back of the fucking neck People are Camoran my fucking My Cossacks People are fucking You're kind of do What a Cossix is Bro I'm done fucking They turn him into an A &A and he's in that bitch They're like he's awesome You know So So tell me about this A ketamine trip.

[1572] We keep getting off track.

[1573] Yeah, sorry, man. No, don't apologize.

[1574] This is awesome.

[1575] I miss you so much, man. Yeah, I miss you too.

[1576] Thanks for having me. I'm happy that you guys are doing so good down here.

[1577] I'm so, I love it down here.

[1578] It's exciting.

[1579] It's been scary kind of, I think, being in, uh, because I still have my apartment in L .A., so I'll go back to work on material, you know?

[1580] Sketchy, though, right?

[1581] Well, I did notice one time I got off the plane and everybody's in masks and everybody's in masks and everybody's scared.

[1582] It's scared.

[1583] Smell it in the air.

[1584] Like them.

[1585] salts.

[1586] And I'm going to take another hit at the very end of the salt right now.

[1587] Look, I'm an attic, bro.

[1588] Let's open that back up again, Jamie.

[1589] Honestly, do get it out.

[1590] Open that back.

[1591] Honestly, do get it.

[1592] He likes it.

[1593] He likes it.

[1594] You hear that, Rob?

[1595] He likes it.

[1596] Oh, my God.

[1597] Take a wits.

[1598] Just open the back.

[1599] You don't need to open the whole thing.

[1600] Just get a little, like, remember whiff.

[1601] Just a little remember whip.

[1602] Give me some, too.

[1603] I'm going to be there with you.

[1604] Here we go.

[1605] Yeah, bro.

[1606] Jesus.

[1607] Yeah, again, you're not supposed to smell it.

[1608] You're supposed to waft it.

[1609] But here's the thing, dude, the lid is sealed.

[1610] This is super sealed.

[1611] There's no way they sell that on the internet, huh?

[1612] I don't know how it stays in the Ziploc bag.

[1613] That's got to be the most powerful Ziploc bag ever.

[1614] We bought this online, right?

[1615] Yeah.

[1616] Bro, I smelled it with my eyes.

[1617] What is the name of this?

[1618] This is that juju...

[1619] How do you say his name?

[1620] Mufu.

[1621] Juju Mufu, guys.

[1622] It's called...

[1623] What is it called?

[1624] Ah!

[1625] That's what it's called.

[1626] How to recalibrate your nuts right there.

[1627] I'll show everybody the thing.

[1628] I'm going to get one more It's just so everybody knows what it is Can you get a focus on it?

[1629] That's what it is I don't think you should be Show that to people do not as it The guy who sells this is fucking Jacked We want to see Show Theo a picture of the dude who sells us You want to be jacked but he has Yes I do But he hasn't Yes I do he loves it He hasn't slept in five years He just wakes up And then I Look at him That's the dude Oh my Full splits, holding, looks like 155 pounds overhead.

[1630] That's a lot.

[1631] He's jacked.

[1632] He's super jacked.

[1633] Yuji Mufu.

[1634] Maybe I will start using this.

[1635] This is his stuff.

[1636] With a lot of those, whoa, right?

[1637] I took a slow hit, boy, dang.

[1638] Why did you do that?

[1639] Because it feels good.

[1640] All right.

[1641] Back to ketamine.

[1642] Yeah.

[1643] Okay, so I'm sitting there in the chair and the man named John, the Serp, the Sherpa kind of, you're in there with a Sherpa.

[1644] I thought it was like a counselor or something.

[1645] I mean, it's a count.

[1646] He had a whistle around his neck.

[1647] That's the only part that made it a little bit dicey.

[1648] But it was sanctioned.

[1649] It's in a beautiful facility.

[1650] It's a nice facility.

[1651] So go in, they put it in you.

[1652] I'm sitting in the chair.

[1653] You had a whistle?

[1654] I think it would like, it might have been a safety piece he had from being a child or something.

[1655] He could have been, I don't know, lifeguard.

[1656] I have no idea what his past was like.

[1657] But he was a nice guy, but he's a therapist.

[1658] So I'm sitting there.

[1659] I start dreaming, you know, like a regular dream, you know.

[1660] I start dreaming a little bit.

[1661] I'm still talking to them.

[1662] And then I start talking about being a kid.

[1663] You know, I love thinking about being a kid and stuff.

[1664] And so I start talking about being a child.

[1665] And then I start talking about my dad.

[1666] And now, like, the darkness is starting to have, like, kind of shapes in it.

[1667] And things are starting to feel that I'm talking about are starting to feel real.

[1668] Like, this feels real.

[1669] I'm sitting in here with you.

[1670] And there's this table here.

[1671] And this, so I can feel, this feels real.

[1672] Jamie's right there.

[1673] So things like that I'm talking about start to feel.

[1674] It has a feeling, not just a vision.

[1675] So I started to feel, I was talking about my dad.

[1676] And next thing you know, I'm spending time with my dad.

[1677] Like I'm with my dad.

[1678] Whoa.

[1679] And I hadn't, you know, and I hadn't gotten to spend time with my dad in 20 years.

[1680] So like, I remember, I got to let my dad know that I loved him.

[1681] I didn't know if he ever knew, you know.

[1682] And it was this crazy.

[1683] thing dude I'm sitting there and I'm bawling crying and like I didn't plan on that when I went in there but it felt like I was really with my like it felt as real as sitting here with you which for for somebody being deceased and gone it was so powerful I would think that that would be a hard thing to share with someone you don't know I guess maybe that's where the academy really comes in and I didn't it didn't bother you that you didn't know and I'm okay with I shared a lot of emotion I share a lot of like I share a lot of emotional stuff.

[1684] So I think I'm probably more prone to it, maybe, than some people.

[1685] But I would just imagine that, like, if you don't know this man and you're sitting down, it's like an intensely personal part of your life.

[1686] Well, he became, the therapist, became just somebody I would check in.

[1687] I would say, John, is everything okay?

[1688] Am I okay?

[1689] Because I started to feel, then I started to slide down the edge of the universe for a minute.

[1690] What's that like?

[1691] It was, it was hard.

[1692] It was hard, because you don't have any real.

[1693] ropes or anything.

[1694] I mean, you're out there just you're like you know, hope solar or your solo hope or whatever that guy who was who climbed that guy.

[1695] You had them on.

[1696] Free solo.

[1697] Alex Honnold.

[1698] Yeah, you're like that too, but there's no but there's no mountain.

[1699] No ropes.

[1700] No mount but you have you do have a bag of chalk on your belt.

[1701] I didn't notice that.

[1702] But I felt like a cryptocurrency.

[1703] I felt myself like going through these channels and then I came back to another moment.

[1704] I got to spend time with oh i got to see my mom when she was a kid which i thought was kind of interesting wow uh and just see that she was like a happy child or something you know or just i don't know so there was moments like that for me that were extremely intense and real um and otherwise it was a lot of moments where i was just out of my i was out of the chair i remember at some point's thinking how am i ever going to get back into that chair wow he'll never get me back in there I was just so far out in my head.

[1705] How long did it last?

[1706] It felt like it lasted for about maybe maybe 13 minutes, but it was an hour.

[1707] Neil Brennan told me about it first.

[1708] He was the first guy telling him about it.

[1709] I'll never forget.

[1710] We're in the hallway of the comedy store.

[1711] You know, Neil's an intense guy.

[1712] He looks at me and he goes, uh, he's like, I was tripping.

[1713] He goes, I didn't know what it was going to be because I was fucking tripping.

[1714] And it was, for him, it was to deal with depression.

[1715] Yeah.

[1716] He said it was very effective.

[1717] Wow.

[1718] To help him a lot.

[1719] I took away from it.

[1720] If you had like some severe tragedy or something like that, then it would really help.

[1721] For me, it didn't feel like a long -term solution.

[1722] It didn't help me with my anger, really.

[1723] So where do you think your anger's coming from?

[1724] I don't know, man. I don't recognize you as an angry guy.

[1725] Like, you and I have only had laughs.

[1726] Yeah.

[1727] When you and I have been hanging out, it's always been just like this, fun.

[1728] Yeah, I think, I think some of it's maybe responsibility.

[1729] Responsibility makes you angry?

[1730] Yeah, I think sometimes I think maybe, I think I thought that whenever my life got a, like, whenever I got more success in my job or something, that I would feel some.

[1731] Satisfaction?

[1732] Something.

[1733] Like you feel like you made it.

[1734] I thought I would feel like, yes, it's different.

[1735] Right.

[1736] And I feel appreciative.

[1737] I feel happy.

[1738] I'm not saying I'm amazing in my job, but once I started to have some success in my job, that I would feel different.

[1739] I see what you're saying.

[1740] And I just didn't, I don't know, you're still the same, everything's still kind of this, you still have all the same things, you know.

[1741] Do you ever have imposter syndrome?

[1742] I've heard about it.

[1743] You don't have that?

[1744] I don't know if I do.

[1745] The idea is that you can't believe that you're successful and you feel like eventually the world's going to wake up and go, why the fuck go?

[1746] my paying attention to this guy.

[1747] He's out of here talking crazy shit about his cousin getting bit by a gay guy.

[1748] Well, it happened on Halloween.

[1749] You know?

[1750] That's my favorite joke you do.

[1751] What happened to Los Angeles, dude?

[1752] That joke kills me. It fucking happened to Los Angeles.

[1753] The guy was dressed up like a baby deer, and my cousin loved a deer hunt.

[1754] That was a crazy part.

[1755] So the dude comes out, and he, you know, his first instinct is to feed him or whatever, you know, sprinkle that piss out there or whatever.

[1756] And the fucking dude bit him, man. That's, you know, that's Newsom.

[1757] A guy biting you.

[1758] Is it Newsom's fault?

[1759] I don't know.

[1760] Just showing me what's happening out there.

[1761] I'm willing to go with you and blame Newsom.

[1762] I don't know.

[1763] I mean, it's just Halloween, you know.

[1764] I remember there was a gay man on Halloween dressed up like a mermaid, and he kept saying, help me up.

[1765] He was laying on the pavement out in West Hollywood.

[1766] Oh, my God.

[1767] I thought that was a good trap.

[1768] I thought, because I even stopped for a second.

[1769] That's a great trap.

[1770] Yeah.

[1771] That's a great trap.

[1772] That's a great trap.

[1773] Somehow, another, like, gay traps don't bother me as much.

[1774] Like, if a guy lays a trap for a woman, that bothers me. But, like, gay traps, like, come on, son.

[1775] You got tricked by that.

[1776] You got tricked by that mermaid trap.

[1777] Dude, there was this hot girl one time, and she told this guy was hitting on her.

[1778] And she said, if you kiss my gay friend, then I'll make out with you.

[1779] The dude kissed a friend, and then she said, nah.

[1780] Oh, brutal.

[1781] That's a good gay trap.

[1782] Well, that's good.

[1783] good on her and fuck him would you ever let a gay dude flirt did you ever let a gay guy flirt with you a little just to keep your spirits up a little keep my spirits up a little or just like say you're sitting somewhere you're talking to a guy and it's a gay guy did you ever you know not act real straight or something because you know what I'm saying though to try to just have a decent day or whatever I'm talking about that like you took advantage of him life but one thing I've not had a problem with is depression yeah I've never had a problem with depression and I think the reason why I mean I've I've felt shitty days where it doesn't feel good but I've never had like prolonged I know people that have actual depression I've had bad days but I think it's because I've always been busy I think my key is like I've always had things I'm obsessed with whether it's martial arts or comedy or pool or all these different things that I've been obsessed with they keep me busy and that keeps me from like really like getting down on myself and I've seen people like sink deep into the depths oh yeah or I don't know if they're going to come out of it so I've never had a problem where I needed someone to pick me up like that so no yeah's the answer but I have had gay guys that flirt with me it was fun as long as it was like an understanding that it's just you're being silly you're being silly right like don't grab my dick Everybody's just being silly.

[1784] It's like, yeah, it's less threatening than, like, for a woman, if a guy is hitting on a woman, the girl's not receptive.

[1785] She's not interested.

[1786] Right.

[1787] But the guy's aggressive about it.

[1788] It gets to a point where it's like, oh, Jesus, like, am I in trouble here?

[1789] Am I scared?

[1790] Like, women can be in trouble where I was like, don't make me fuck you up.

[1791] Right.

[1792] Like, hey, hey, hey.

[1793] I'm fine.

[1794] Yeah.

[1795] Hey, hey.

[1796] Hey, stop.

[1797] Stop.

[1798] You know, it wasn't like I was in danger.

[1799] you know which is the nice thing about knowing how to fight right it's like in situations like that we're like hey hey hey stop yeah relax yeah leave me alone everything yeah but i did have to push some guys arms off me once i was in montreal and this fucking dude kept trying me to get get me to go up to his hotel room with him oh he was drunk canadian gayes baby they're he was super aggressive they'll grapple yeah yeah man i uh Yeah, I remember one time this dude was kind of flirt.

[1800] I mean, I kind of let it happen a little bit, but I remember I drew like a...

[1801] How far?

[1802] What's a little bit?

[1803] I mean, just...

[1804] Touching?

[1805] Sitting at a bar.

[1806] Let rest his head on your shoulder?

[1807] Doing a crossword together.

[1808] Imagine the guy is...

[1809] It's a doku.

[1810] Imagine if a guy is, he's like, I just want to lay my head on your shoulder.

[1811] That's it.

[1812] I'm like, all right, man. Go ahead.

[1813] You know, we were just talking about this the other day.

[1814] Listen, how come...

[1815] I would put those things like they put for birds on your shoulders, you know what I'm talking about.

[1816] To keep birds from shit on a roof?

[1817] To get you from landing on the bench.

[1818] Sorry to interrupt you go on.

[1819] Gene Simmons costume was all about.

[1820] Yeah, I put on a Gene Simmons costume.

[1821] There's spikes.

[1822] It was, we were just having this conversation the other day.

[1823] Why is it, like, every man shakes a man's hand.

[1824] Yeah.

[1825] How you doing?

[1826] Nice to meet you.

[1827] But you can't hold on to it.

[1828] You can't hold a man's hand because that's gay.

[1829] Indian men, I noticed, do it.

[1830] They'll stay in there longer.

[1831] Well, it's a big thing with Saudi Arabia.

[1832] There was a video that like it got, it was real weird with George Bush, W. When he was president, was walking, holding hands with one of the Saudi royals.

[1833] They were holding hands because in their culture, that is a normal thing to do.

[1834] But it's weird because we shake hands.

[1835] shaking hands is a hundred percent normal and not only that like you have to do it firm handshake nice to meet you how are you how are you good to see you like a nice firm handshake i like that man hello but hang on to it let's hold hands no i'm not into that bro yeah i'm into just a quick shake and then i'm out yeah i just want to see if i'm gay i want to see if my dick gets hard when i'm holding your head look i'm willing to take the test but I'm not ready to take the whole treatment.

[1836] How long does a handshake?

[1837] When does it become holding hands?

[1838] At what point?

[1839] How many seconds in?

[1840] Well, I mean...

[1841] How many seconds in?

[1842] 30?

[1843] Oh, sorry, I'm thinking...

[1844] Let's see what 30 is like.

[1845] Ready?

[1846] Go.

[1847] Here's 30 seconds.

[1848] Ready?

[1849] Yeah.

[1850] Imagine this.

[1851] All right.

[1852] Nice to meet you, Theo.

[1853] Thanks.

[1854] Theo, where you're from?

[1855] I'm from Atlanta, actually.

[1856] Oh, you were born Atlanta?

[1857] No, I just spent a lot of time there, man. Man. Look at this.

[1858] 14 seconds in.

[1859] My hand is getting tired.

[1860] He's doing it.

[1861] No, no, no. Don't go anywhere.

[1862] Okay.

[1863] So what do you do?

[1864] You do comedy?

[1865] No, yeah, I do some comedy.

[1866] Five more seconds.

[1867] Yeah, man. I'd love to stay and hang out, buddy, but...

[1868] No, no, no, no. Go anywhere.

[1869] 15.

[1870] So that's 30 seconds.

[1871] That was 30 seconds.

[1872] But how much more would you get to know about somebody if you held their hand?

[1873] Not much more.

[1874] I mean, would you get to know more?

[1875] Well, that's what I'm wondering, is there's some like older tradition where like if you're walking with your brother and you're holding your brother's hand, are you able to get some senses and get like a, was there ever like some kind of maybe pathology?

[1876] I don't know if that's the word, but that would say, hey, you know, your brother's having a tough time or he's not telling you something.

[1877] Could you read something in?

[1878] Well, you do get that from hugs, right?

[1879] You ever have a buddy that's going through a hard time you give him a hug and he starts crying and then you hug him harder You know I'm that buddy Yeah that's you bro I just didn't want to bring your name up Oh yeah totally Oh I'm on the emo All -Star team baby You know what I'm saying Oh scientists have suggested That a handshake lasting more than three seconds Could spell doom For a working relationship What kind of fucking scientists are these Scientists in Dallas Texas I'll tell you that Research Research researches in Dundee Where the fuck is Dundee?

[1880] This is in England Found extended power grabs Could even trigger anxiety Also men are trying to trigger anxiety By hold it on your hand too long They should also negatively impact business meetings And affect relationships More than three seconds All right let's count three seconds ready Hold hands One two Well let's do it man Let's just go ahead and do it So it seems real.

[1881] I'll clean my hands up here.

[1882] All right.

[1883] Ready?

[1884] Yeah.

[1885] One, two, three.

[1886] That feels fair.

[1887] I think we're good.

[1888] Yeah, well, we're fine.

[1889] We're friends.

[1890] Yeah, we can do this for quite a while.

[1891] I think once you move somewhere else, you've got to let go, though, because if you move anywhere.

[1892] Let's get up.

[1893] Let's stand up.

[1894] Yeah, see, it's way too much action.

[1895] Over here.

[1896] At what point in time is it got on?

[1897] That's way too far.

[1898] Yeah, you're doing well?

[1899] I'm okay.

[1900] Be okay?

[1901] Yeah, starting to get a little.

[1902] How lot is that?

[1903] But it's a strange thing, like holding a hand can become weird, but shaking a hand is completely normal.

[1904] But I wonder if one started from the, like, if it, because it's shaking, I just wonder where handshaking started, I guess.

[1905] I think it came from sword fighting.

[1906] The idea is that you're holding the right hand, which is the hand that you hold your sword.

[1907] I'm pretty sure that's what it is.

[1908] That's also like in England while they drive on the left side of the road, because you have your sword on the right hand.

[1909] So if someone's coming at you You want to be able to attack them with your right hand Which means you want to be on the left side of them Oh wow I'm pretty sure that's where it came from We need to bring back swords dude That's the shit that we miss imagine it's drawing on somebody We might be soon who knows Who even knows man Run out of bullets If society collapses we get hit by an asteroid We run out of bullets Well dude I thought about this the other day That guy who's gonna be Outside of the Walmart Whatever shaken for the quarters you know And we're gonna have a coin shortage going on this You're like, that guy's going to be.

[1910] Is there a coin shortage?

[1911] We should get rid of coins.

[1912] Everywhere I go there's a coin shortage.

[1913] Look this.

[1914] The US president once shared a 19 -minute handshake with Shinzo Abe and held Emmanuel Macquan's hand for a full 29 seconds on a visit to France in 2017.

[1915] Oh, this is Trump.

[1916] Trump's a bad motherfucker.

[1917] He's playing my games of people.

[1918] Bad news for Donald Trump, whose lengthy greetings have become notorious.

[1919] 19 minutes for long time.

[1920] Wow.

[1921] He shared a 19 -minute handshake.

[1922] Well, that's with Shenzhou Abe.

[1923] That's a Japanese dude who was probably playing some samurai shit on him.

[1924] That guy's in Bellator, I think.

[1925] Okay, first of all to say that.

[1926] He was probably like shirtless.

[1927] A little fucking samurai stare down.

[1928] And Trump didn't read any of the information in the beginning.

[1929] He has no idea.

[1930] Amazing.

[1931] Amazing handshake.

[1932] I love your country.

[1933] I love sushi.

[1934] I love California rolls.

[1935] 19 minutes is crazy I love video games He's just I don't think You've fucked more than 10 times More than 19 minutes Oh Oh I'll probably twice in my life Maybe once The fact that this guy This guy's sharing handshakes For 19 minutes That is crazy That's long man That's a long time kid What were we talking about handshakes We were talking About ketamine And then Then we went into Neil Brennan Depression Neil Brennan's funny handshakes he's very funny he's a great writer he's a nice guy yeah a lot of people don't get along with him and I always wonder what that is I've always gotten along with that dude yeah I think someone he can maybe does he knows a lot and so he wants to share it sometimes maybe and if you're dumb or something you don't you don't want more information you know maybe or maybe you're uncomfortable with someone who's smart and has glasses on something about smart dudes of glasses I feel like they're just showing off.

[1936] Yeah.

[1937] Yeah, like we know.

[1938] Yeah.

[1939] Come on, man. You don't have to have the glasses.

[1940] I get it.

[1941] You read.

[1942] Yeah.

[1943] Take them off and be blurry.

[1944] Well, you've got to look at things all perfect and crystal clear.

[1945] Yeah, come down here with the rest of it.

[1946] Come look at things blurry.

[1947] Who do you hang with in Nashville?

[1948] You got friends out there?

[1949] Do you know people?

[1950] I mean, there's some real.

[1951] I mean, there's all.

[1952] Let me see, who do I...

[1953] Well, I spend a lot of time I've been touring.

[1954] Yeah?

[1955] So that's been crazy.

[1956] It's been keeping me busy.

[1957] It's like every weekend I've been out on the road.

[1958] That's great.

[1959] So that's been awesome.

[1960] Do you have guys you bring with you?

[1961] Yeah, I bring Ari Manas with me. Oh, cool.

[1962] So he's, you know, he's...

[1963] From the store?

[1964] Yeah.

[1965] And he's all...

[1966] That dude is something else, man. He is something else.

[1967] And sometimes I'll just pick up random people.

[1968] So...

[1969] And he's...

[1970] Zaney's your home club?

[1971] Yeah, but it's hard.

[1972] The only nights to really be able to get up there is Monday night.

[1973] So there's not a lot of opportunity to get up and practice a lot.

[1974] What is like Tuesday, Wednesday?

[1975] They have just regular shows there?

[1976] Yeah, they have other shows going on.

[1977] It's so popular.

[1978] It's a popular club.

[1979] Yeah, it's too popular club, and it's nice because great comics come through town so you get to see them.

[1980] Yeah, that's a great club.

[1981] That's one of the all -time great clubs.

[1982] Yeah, people love it, and Brian Dorfin runs it, and Lucy, and they've been really sweet to me. Nate Bargatsy lives in town, so I get to see him.

[1983] I love that, dude.

[1984] Yeah.

[1985] He's great.

[1986] He's funny, man. Man, that cough button is important.

[1987] I didn't have the cop button.

[1988] The old people used to get mad.

[1989] But see, this is it, folks.

[1990] When you see my left hand going there, watch, I can talk.

[1991] I can talk.

[1992] Now I'm talking.

[1993] Cough button's huge.

[1994] We're like professionals.

[1995] Nate Bargazzi.

[1996] So it's you, Nate.

[1997] Any other comics live in town?

[1998] Is the ghost of Ralph?

[1999] May still hovering around.

[2000] Josh Wolf lives there.

[2001] Josh Wolf moved there.

[2002] Ralphie Mae is dead.

[2003] Ralphie Mae is dead.

[2004] The ghost of Ralphie Mae.

[2005] Ghosts Ruffy May still looms.

[2006] Who else?

[2007] You don't see, I mean, everybody's just been touring right now since things are open, you know, more open.

[2008] And, yeah, I'm trying to think of what else.

[2009] Some things are interesting.

[2010] You get caught up in, like, more like small town kind of, or smaller city conversations and stuff, you know?

[2011] Yeah.

[2012] Like, I went to the, like, I went to the, like, I went to.

[2013] this gas station the other day, and the manager or something comes out, and he's like, hey, man, I'm a fan, you know, nice guy.

[2014] And he's like, I just want to let you know we got fresh, what do you say, fresh baked bread inside, fresh baked pizzas.

[2015] We bake everything in -house.

[2016] Right, right, okay, so, right, right.

[2017] That's my first thought.

[2018] I'd just been inside, okay?

[2019] There's nothing fresh in this joint.

[2020] Nothing in there is fresh.

[2021] Nothing in there ever even new an animal, right?

[2022] Or a garden.

[2023] Zero percent chance, bro.

[2024] This shit is so fake.

[2025] It's like, I don't know.

[2026] It's kind of like, anyway, so I have to sit there and just bullshit with the guy like they're baking fresh in there.

[2027] So now it's like every time I'm going and see him.

[2028] Yes, he's like, if you ever want anything fresh, man, just let me know.

[2029] We'll pull it right out the oven for you.

[2030] And I'm like, doesn't that suck when someone's real friendly, but what they're selling is bullshit?

[2031] Oh, it's crazy, man. So now I have to pretend that I'm smelling like pie and shit when I go like that stuff.

[2032] So you just get in small town, you know, smaller city, stuff like that.

[2033] He pulls out Pop -Tarts, but Tedzy just made him.

[2034] Yeah, totally, totally.

[2035] He's just doing all of this, yeah.

[2036] He's got...

[2037] Right out of the oven.

[2038] He's got Ratatouille on the speaker system in there.

[2039] It's just, so stuff like that, you know, you got some crazy guys.

[2040] You got Kid Rock lives in town.

[2041] You got, like...

[2042] I hung out of Kid Rock's house.

[2043] Did you really?

[2044] Yeah.

[2045] Dude, let me tell you this story.

[2046] I get a text from Kid Rock.

[2047] He says, hey man. He coming to Nashville.

[2048] Come out to my ranch, a farm, whatever he calls it, and come hang out.

[2049] I go, fuck yeah.

[2050] It's hype out there.

[2051] Me and Sakura took a ride with my buddy Matt and Phil, and we went out to Kid Rock spot.

[2052] And Kid Rock has a fucking spread.

[2053] Kid Rock has a church.

[2054] He has a church.

[2055] With horses in it.

[2056] He owns a fucking church on his property.

[2057] It's got the whole thing with the peak and the cross.

[2058] And there's two horses in there.

[2059] Yeah, he's got it turned to just stable, but it was a church.

[2060] And his place is wild.

[2061] Yeah.

[2062] And Jimmy John from Jimmy John's Suss was there.

[2063] Oh, yeah.

[2064] Jimmy John's, oh, Jimmy John's a buddy of mine, man. He came on my podcast.

[2065] Great guy.

[2066] Here's where it gets nuts.

[2067] Yeah.

[2068] Kid Rock has built a White House.

[2069] Yeah.

[2070] Do you know this?

[2071] Yeah, I've seen it.

[2072] Have you been there?

[2073] In person?

[2074] It's like, yeah, I've been up there.

[2075] It is an actual White House.

[2076] Listen to me, ladies and gentlemen, you know, listen to me, it's 27 ,000 square feet two bedrooms and not even crazy big bedrooms, just regular bedrooms.

[2077] The rest of the house is party.

[2078] It is the most wild rock star hillbilly type shit.

[2079] It's when you give a hillbilly, when you give a real redneck and you give them fucking insane amounts of money, they build something like this.

[2080] Yeah.

[2081] Oh, you can get neutered in that bitch in one area.

[2082] It was so crazy.

[2083] Like, we were walking around that.

[2084] It just kept getting crazier and crazier.

[2085] It is crazy to go see that place up on that hill.

[2086] Yeah.

[2087] He's got a 20 -person jacuzzi that looks like an abandoned mine.

[2088] So it's like all stone walls with, like, exposed wooden beams and like gas lanterns that are hanging from the ceiling.

[2089] He spares no expense.

[2090] Real carbon monoxide, too, bumping into the water, I bet.

[2091] He's got, he built a golden shower.

[2092] Like the shower is all gold It's a giant shower room That's got these like sparkly gold tiles In the wildest tile It's crazy I gotta go look and see It makes its next level shit Like when I walked out of there I was like I gotta build a house Yeah I gotta build a house It represents me Because all the houses that I've ever had They were like there were nice houses They're for sale I bought a house This is like he's building this shit Yeah And while it's being built He lives in a trailer Which is hilarious.

[2093] Yeah, I've shot Skeet off the back of his trailer before.

[2094] That's hilarious.

[2095] Yeah, yeah, he's been, yeah, Bob, that's his real name, but Kid Rock, yeah, he's always, sometimes we'll go down to his pub and stuff if he's doing something fun.

[2096] He's always doing some fun stuff, so he'll invite you out.

[2097] Yeah, yeah.

[2098] Jimmy John is a, you know, he's become like a confidant.

[2099] Does Jimmy John live there?

[2100] Does he live in Nashville as well?

[2101] He does.

[2102] So he's like, he's a neat guy.

[2103] He's a really neat guy.

[2104] And he loves big game hunting and stuff like you do.

[2105] So I'm sure you guys know some of that stuff.

[2106] Yeah, we were talking about hunting a lot.

[2107] But his whole spread is so crazy.

[2108] Yeah, when you get out to Kid Rock's place, it's something else.

[2109] It's pretty funny.

[2110] But things like that are interesting.

[2111] Yeah, it's like what you would expect from a rock star.

[2112] Yeah.

[2113] Like what you would hope a rock star would do.

[2114] Like, if you were a Kid Rock fan, like, God, I hope Kid Rock lives like a baller.

[2115] Well, he does.

[2116] Yeah.

[2117] Yeah.

[2118] Yeah, that's one thing Yeah, like he lives it to the nth degree man Yeah, he goes all out He's a real fucking dirt serpent Dude serpent, dude He really is A dirt serpent That's what David Spade calls him all the time That's funny And that's pretty funny That's funny Because David Spade when he played Joe Dirt is basically paying like a miniature version of Kid Rock with no talent And Kid Rock was in that movie Oh, that's right But like Joe Dirt is like Kid Rock And Kid Rock wasn't a rock star Oh, yeah.

[2119] Yeah, dude.

[2120] Oh, totally.

[2121] Dude, I thought that thing was a documentary when I first saw Joe Dirt, I remember.

[2122] I thought, I didn't even know, like, you know, between documentaries and movies.

[2123] And I remember thinking, damn, his parents left him at the Grand Canyon, dude.

[2124] And I thought I was jealous.

[2125] I was like, damn, dude, to get to go to the Grand Canyon, you know?

[2126] Have you never been?

[2127] Uh -uh.

[2128] Wow, where you got to go, man. I would like to go.

[2129] It's not that big deal.

[2130] I'll go one time, maybe when I get a wife or something.

[2131] Yeah, wait till then.

[2132] Something you get to say for a wife.

[2133] I'm ready for wife, I think.

[2134] Yeah?

[2135] Get yourself a Nashville wife.

[2136] Yeah, I got to get something, man. I got to get...

[2137] I'm trying to stay...

[2138] I got to get better at being like in a committed.

[2139] Yeah, get one of them Tennessee girls.

[2140] Got a sweet accent.

[2141] With that risky biscuit on them.

[2142] Yeah.

[2143] Likes to cook.

[2144] Where's cut off jeans.

[2145] Yeah.

[2146] Cowboy boots with no socks.

[2147] Cut off bras.

[2148] Ooh.

[2149] cut off genetics you mean is that we're talking about this definitely yeah we got we got fresh baked pizzas every day here I'm like bitch you have fucking bro you say that but it's worth the risk because what if you went in there and they had amazing bread yeah like there's a gas station that I found out here that sells tacos and they're fucking bomb they're really good I got read a review and I was like where is this fucking place and I followed it on the maps and I got to a gas station.

[2150] I'm like, I think it's in the gas station.

[2151] Like, this is crazy.

[2152] And I went in the gas station and they serve tacos.

[2153] And they're legit.

[2154] Like, they got like a grill back there as a dude actually making them.

[2155] Yeah, okay.

[2156] This smells.

[2157] I'm smelling this still.

[2158] Let me get another hit.

[2159] You want another one?

[2160] Yeah, sorry.

[2161] You're so gang.

[2162] Yeah, buddy.

[2163] That's how we do it.

[2164] Go ahead.

[2165] One, two, three, go.

[2166] I got to join you.

[2167] Yeah, my man. I can't be a pussy.

[2168] My man. Here we go.

[2169] You know, I love you.

[2170] Okay, what's that guy said?

[2171] Yeah, he said, I love you, and you can't have love without sex.

[2172] That's what he said.

[2173] I'll never forget that.

[2174] I was like, oh, great.

[2175] I got to stab this dude.

[2176] Oh, damn, dude.

[2177] I mean, Nashville is amazing.

[2178] Also, things that are close, like I went to Chad and Nuga the other day and did shows.

[2179] Like, to drive over.

[2180] Here's one thing I'm finding amazing.

[2181] Driving to shows.

[2182] Yeah.

[2183] change oh i can sleep on the way like we're getting a tour bus for the first time coming up oh shit i've never done that i don't know if i like it or not call bert bert's the master of no oh yeah he's the tour bus master he is he gets his face on the but he didn't even give a fucking people know it's his bus he doesn't even hide his face is all over his bus yeah he goes hard he does yeah but i'm like how does he not worry about being stalked by crazy people like how many crazy drunks want to chase after burnt an alcoholic driver hitting him that would be my biggest yeah that's how they'd want to go out right yeah if you were hammered and you found burst tour bus you're like oh this is it I'm changing lanes bang head on the machine yeah yeah that could happen man that's that's probably how it's going to happen um he's got a movie coming out I know he burn crusher is going to be gigantic have you seen that video of him in Tallahassee on stage where you got the whole audience to put their phones up, and he was like having them cheer, like fucking Viking shit.

[2184] I don't know if I've seen any of that.

[2185] It's wild, man. Burt is blowing the fuck up.

[2186] He is on stage, and there's thousands of people in this audience with the lights from their cell phone, and they're chanting some kind of Tallahassee cheer that they do that they only know down there when they wear flip flops all day.

[2187] And it's wild, man. With those sunburned toe tops, yeah, man. it's crazy yeah he's really uh beloved oh my god so much so look at this and what is that a rib cage what does he have it's like a arrow oh it's a really dumb arrow because there's too many feathers on it it's an arrow from someone who's never killed anything with an arrow look at this play that but look how many people are doing this there's thousands of people in there that's comedy man people are hyped up and his shoes match that arrow that's cool he's the he's the tour bus master he does tours you know bert's his schedule if you look at his uh scares me i don't know how he does it not die that's what scares me it's i feel like it i i don't know if i could handle it maybe it's a week of me saying that i think he's it's crazy i mean i don't think it's sustainable did you feel scared like sometimes i felt scared like about moving not being in los handelous like that I would like things would fall apart you know did you ever feel like that or have fear about that no no I looked forward to it I was I was pumped to move here I like risks I got this weird part of me that likes when the unknown is happening I enjoy it I get excited because I feel like I could like if you're successful and things are going too well you can get very stagnant and you get comfortable being successful so I like to do dangerous shit I like to do new things.

[2188] When I do new things that I suck at, then you have to learn.

[2189] I think it excites a part of your brain that doesn't exist otherwise.

[2190] Like for me, to go to a new market, like a new place, like Austin, where I've been coming since the 90s, I've been coming here forever.

[2191] And I love this town.

[2192] I've always loved it.

[2193] It's like out of the places that I thought I could live, this is one of them.

[2194] But when my family was interested in it, when my children really wanted to move here.

[2195] And my wife was willing, I'm like, we're in, let's go.

[2196] I had no hesitation whatsoever.

[2197] I'm like, I could do comedy anywhere.

[2198] And I'm like, the podcast had gotten big enough.

[2199] Yeah.

[2200] I'm like, I am pretty sure I could do the podcast anywhere, anywhere.

[2201] I don't think I have a problem with getting people to come to it because it's beneficial to them.

[2202] Oh, yeah.

[2203] I was excited to come.

[2204] I was excited to have you.

[2205] But I'm like, if I could just fly people out, I don't think, because I was flying people out to L .A. all the time.

[2206] Like all those doctors and scientists and scholars that I was talking to on the podcast, I fly them out.

[2207] I flew people out two, three times a week sometimes.

[2208] So I was like, I'll just fly them to Austin.

[2209] It's in the center, you know?

[2210] So if you're coming from New York, it's a quicker flight.

[2211] If you're coming from L .A., it's not that bad.

[2212] It's like, and if you're traveling two places, it's much more convenient.

[2213] But the thing that gets me when I got here, like right away, I was like, people are so much more friendly.

[2214] Oh, yeah.

[2215] They're regular people.

[2216] And it made me more friendly.

[2217] It made me more relaxed.

[2218] It's like we were dealing with that crazy.

[2219] showbiz manic energy in L .A. Oh, yeah.

[2220] I think it burnt me up.

[2221] Yeah.

[2222] Oh, my neighbor in Nashville, he's like he coaches soccer at Lipscomb, you know, at a college.

[2223] And he's like, the other day, a snake, Bobby Lee sent me a snake in the mail, which is, I feel like it's illegal.

[2224] Yeah.

[2225] Was it alive?

[2226] A living snake that came out of a box into my home.

[2227] Why did he do that?

[2228] Like as a prank, you know.

[2229] Fucking Bobby.

[2230] It was a lot, but, you know, game on.

[2231] What are you sending him now?

[2232] But my neighbor then comes over to help me like people are like wanting that you know people are like nice and like it's just funny like um i felt super accepted over there um like i get to meet some of my favorite like i like i like a lot of country music you know like morgan wall and blake shelton like those are guys i've gotten to meet you know just some stuff like that you get to meet like just people you never thought like um clay matthews lives there he he plays football um i don't know there's just all types of people you just I don't know it's just been interesting and just everybody there's so nice they're like happy to have you like hey what's up man I'm glad you're here yeah that you're glad I'm somewhere like I've never felt like that in my life thank you that's that's what's been happening to me out here too the same vibe and it's just they're regular people I think as comedians we are connected to aspects of show business that are not good for comedy me like if you You're a comedian and you're trying to get on a sitcom.

[2233] In the 1990s, in the 1990s, that was, it was important.

[2234] You needed to get on a sitcom if you wanted to have, like, a touring, if you wanted to be able to have a touring presence, if you're on a sitcom, everybody's like, oh, there's that guy from that show, and then they'd come to see you.

[2235] But now with the internet, I think that is not necessary anymore.

[2236] And in fact, it gets in the way.

[2237] because these guys that do want to be on those shows they'll change their act and because they're worried about saying something controversial or something that might be taken out of context or misconstrued comedy is about you got to express yourself in the funniest way possible and you and me and all those guys that were at the store when we're at the store all the time we're saying wild shit and we're saying wild shit to make each other laugh Like, I specifically remember you saying something really wild and me laughing in the back of the room and then you laughing at us laughing.

[2238] Oh, yeah.

[2239] You know, it's like...

[2240] That's so much fun.

[2241] It's so much fun.

[2242] But all that stops if there's a producer in the audience that's like, what he's saying is very controversial.

[2243] His cousin got bit by a gay guy.

[2244] Like, what is that supposed to mean?

[2245] Right.

[2246] Like, we can't have that.

[2247] You know, like, that kind of thing, well, you might want to take that bit out of your act or you might want to tone this thing down.

[2248] Or you might want a virtue signal.

[2249] You might want to say something about, like, you know, how these non -binary people are people, too.

[2250] And these people that don't support that, well, don't come to my show.

[2251] You might want to take a stand so those producers listen to you.

[2252] Like, we see that with comedians.

[2253] You see that with some comedians that get, like, deeply embedded in the Hollywood community of business?

[2254] Joe, the other day a girl did a set up my show.

[2255] She was on the same show as me, right?

[2256] It was my show, you know, and she was on the show as a comedian, right?

[2257] So we're on the same show.

[2258] And the show was a pretty diverse audience when I looked out there.

[2259] It was like a lot of female, a lot of Latinos, you know.

[2260] Viva la Mexico, you know.

[2261] A lot of Mexicans, you know.

[2262] And some whites out there.

[2263] And so she comes backstage after, and she goes, I just want to say, you're really doing your job.

[2264] You have a very diverse audience.

[2265] You're really doing your job.

[2266] and that shit fucking i was like what i don't care who i mean i care who comes that they're good people and they're they want to have a good time but i don't i can't pick each type what are you what is even happening it's the dumbest thing to think about like i i just want people to have fun if i if i go out there and i see everyone's black and they're having a great time great if i go out and see everybody's white and they're having a good time it doesn't bother me like where's the Asian representation.

[2267] I don't think that.

[2268] I never look out in the audience and look for Asian people.

[2269] It's like nonsense.

[2270] We're getting to this point where we're trying so hard to show people that were not racist that we're thinking in a sort of a racist way.

[2271] You know?

[2272] Oh, yeah.

[2273] I think, well, it was interesting.

[2274] Even after like some of the BLM stuff, some of it turned into like this black supremacy thing I felt like sometimes.

[2275] And that made me feel sometimes like it was making more racial issue in the world than there was.

[2276] I think it has to settle down.

[2277] But that's just my perception.

[2278] I think what happens is like, look, clearly this country is a fucking horrible racist history of slavery, of Jim Crow laws, of segregation and redlining.

[2279] And we moved out of that.

[2280] We tried, like there's the civil rights movement of the 1960s and then through the 70s and the 80s and everything is like slowly getting better.

[2281] But there's waves, right?

[2282] There's the Charlottesville Tiki Torch douche douche bags.

[2283] And then there's people that, you know, they push back this way and that way.

[2284] And it's like waves of things that need to settle.

[2285] But the way they settle is with love and friendship and community.

[2286] This is the way they settle.

[2287] Like we all just realize like I love everyone.

[2288] I love people that are interesting.

[2289] I don't give a fuck where they're from.

[2290] I do in that it's interesting to hear where you're from.

[2291] You're from India.

[2292] You're from Bangladesh.

[2293] You're from Myanmar.

[2294] Tell me. Wyoming even.

[2295] Wyoming, fuck yeah.

[2296] I'm interested in people.

[2297] Yeah.

[2298] I don't like one group of people better than I like another group of people.

[2299] Especially based on something that they do.

[2300] I do like comedians more than most people because they're wilder.

[2301] But I don't like them if they're brown or yellow or white.

[2302] I don't give a fuck.

[2303] So what's interesting to me is who are you?

[2304] I think eventually we'll get to that place as a society.

[2305] where all we care about is what Martin Luther King said.

[2306] Don't judge a man by the color of his skin, but by the content of his character.

[2307] That's what we're gonna get to there.

[2308] And we're gonna battle it back, and you're gonna have grifters along the way.

[2309] And this is the problem.

[2310] This is what you see in that Colin Kaepernick Netflix special.

[2311] This is what you see in some of the people that are complaining online.

[2312] They're grifters.

[2313] And what their business is is racial tension.

[2314] Their business is accentuating racial tension, highlighting racial tension, highlighting racial biases and distorting them.

[2315] And then they make a living off of that.

[2316] That's how they sell books.

[2317] That's how they do...

[2318] That's crazy to me. It is crazy.

[2319] That's how they do speeches and they get paid to speak at universities and corporations.

[2320] And there's an incentive for them to continue accentuating the strife in this country.

[2321] But why do people grasp onto that and not try and see a different thing?

[2322] I mean, it's also, So this is, I only know my own perspective, but why do people not, like, why do people still grasp onto that?

[2323] Well, because if you are financially incentivized to continue to grasp onto it, you will.

[2324] If you're a person who's gotten a tremendous amount of attention and social media attention by accentuating racial differences and talking about them and highlighting them, then that becomes your go -to move.

[2325] Just like, you know, some comics have like a fucking thing that they do all the time.

[2326] might be a redneck right that becomes your move like you got to keep doing that right there's a thing that people do when it gets a lot of attention and it like Colin Kaepernick what's the thing that's got him a lot of attention highlighting racism yeah so now he takes it so far that it's ludicrous right yeah yeah yeah right yeah takes it so far that a guy who's made 43 million dollars in this fucking business of you know of pursuing this athletic glory is complaining and saying that that athletic glory is akin to slavery.

[2327] Yeah, doing slavery is way tougher, too, than any of these two -a -days.

[2328] That's crazy.

[2329] You know what I'm saying?

[2330] If you look at that kind of stuff.

[2331] Those guys are banging hoes and driving rolls.

[2332] They're driving fucking Bintleys.

[2333] Yeah, I could barely even make it through Amistad.

[2334] You know what I'm saying?

[2335] I could watch Hard Knocks eat much easier.

[2336] You know what I'm saying?

[2337] Joey Diaz was in the longest yard.

[2338] Was he really?

[2339] I bet it was a fucking hell of long yard if he was blunting up and earned it.

[2340] I bet it took a half hour to get through it, man. I miss him, dude.

[2341] Dude, that's one thing I think I miss, man. I miss them dearly.

[2342] There's one thing I think I was like, it's so different when you go to the comedy store.

[2343] Yeah.

[2344] It's just so different, man. Dude, a friend of mine, I don't want to say who it was.

[2345] Went back then and said it was terrible.

[2346] They said, the lineup sucked.

[2347] No one was there.

[2348] Will it ever be the same, you think?

[2349] No. Not if they keep telling everyone they have to be vaccinated.

[2350] Yeah.

[2351] And, you know, like, even comics that have already had COVID and gotten over it and have the antibodies like you, got to be vaccinated?

[2352] Like, why?

[2353] Well, they emailed Jeff Scott, the dead pianist and made him, when him was sending a vax car.

[2354] I'm like, come, I give this guy a fucking break.

[2355] Poor Jeff, he's a big part of why the store will never be the same.

[2356] Yeah.

[2357] That guy was the, like, as far as, like, non -comedians, obviously, number one, it was Mitchie.

[2358] When Mitsy was gone, it was like, God damn.

[2359] Was it really?

[2360] You remember that?

[2361] Oh, it was so hard for me. It was, like, the feeling that Mitsy was gone.

[2362] Like, I can't believe she's gone.

[2363] I knew she was dying, but she was so important.

[2364] Oh, when she died, I'm thinking.

[2365] more when she actually physically kind of left the premises.

[2366] Well, she left the premises long before she died.

[2367] And it was kind of that like prepared people for her death.

[2368] But out of all the people that have ever lived that are important for comedy, she's the most important ever that's not a comedian.

[2369] She is number one.

[2370] Without her, I would never, never have gotten through comedy.

[2371] I would never have been who I am.

[2372] Wow.

[2373] That would be the case with most of the comedians that came out of the store.

[2374] she was the godmother she was the fucking queen that lady was you know she was a wild woman man who just supported comedy hook line and sinker when when someone would like do something crazy on stage and Mitzie would get a letter like about that like a complaint she would laugh like ah listen to this she thought it was so funny she never caved like all this social media pressure that wouldn't have done shit to Mitzie.

[2375] Wow.

[2376] That lady was bulletproof.

[2377] She didn't give a fuck.

[2378] She knew what she wanted.

[2379] What she wanted was wild comedy.

[2380] That lady supported wild comedy.

[2381] If people didn't like each other, she put them on next to each other back to back.

[2382] Make them bring each other up.

[2383] Yeah, let's go.

[2384] Put Keith Peterson in between them.

[2385] She wanted chaos.

[2386] That lady loved chaos.

[2387] She was amazing.

[2388] She was a once -in -a -lifetime human being.

[2389] Wow.

[2390] Yeah, I wish I had a guy.

[2391] I'd probably know her better.

[2392] Really?

[2393] Forever in her debt.

[2394] That's cool to hear, man. Forever.

[2395] Yeah, I think we all are in a lot of ways.

[2396] When I think about, man, dude, sometimes it's like, I just think about the lineup.

[2397] I would look at the lineup and it would be like, you, Seguro, Whitney, Coco.

[2398] When Diaz's music starts up.

[2399] Neil Brennan, Jessel neck.

[2400] It was like one after the other.

[2401] In a jumpsuit walking up there.

[2402] He's all fucking hor -a -rah -rah.

[2403] Yeah.

[2404] Yeah.

[2405] God.

[2406] Is she, you know, did she used to call him Fat Baby?

[2407] Do you know that?

[2408] Yeah, Joey's name.

[2409] You know, Mitzie would give people names.

[2410] Does Joey mean Fat Baby in Spanish or not in Spanish?

[2411] No, no, no, no, no. She just decided to call him Fat Baby.

[2412] So Joey's name, when he would go on stage, like you would see it on the lineup.

[2413] You know, like you'd see, like Theo Vaughn, Fat Baby.

[2414] It would just.

[2415] That was his name.

[2416] That was a good nickname.

[2417] That's a good nickname.

[2418] She just decided, well, I want to call him Fat Baby.

[2419] She just called it.

[2420] It was amazing.

[2421] And it would say that on the lineup.

[2422] It would say Fat Baby.

[2423] I'd love to see him snuggled up somewhere with a big Salomon sandwich.

[2424] Yeah.

[2425] She loved him, man. I bet he was a handsome little baby too.

[2426] Oh, he was a cute kid.

[2427] There's photos of Joey when he was real young dancing.

[2428] Oh, could you imagine?

[2429] You never seen?

[2430] Look at this fucking lineup.

[2431] Fat Baby right there.

[2432] There he is.

[2433] Look at that Look at that line up Pauly Shore Shane Mattosh Sam Tripoli Kirk Fox baby Tripp Brett Ernst Maz Jabrani Kurt Fox Brian Holtsman And then Fat Baby Bringing in the Kinnison Spot Argus Hamilton God damn Rick Ingram Look Rick Ingram used to be Richard 2003 he was Richard Ingram He wasn't even Rick Didn't have time for it Wow that is wild Driving the Shard Fat Baby Brian Holtzman So there was a For Jeff Scott There was a memorial on Zoom right And so every is like 70 or 80 people on the memorial Right And you know Holtzman's outlandish He says like he's like the last Like most outlandish voice there is really a lot of times And so we're all in this memorial People are saying like sad stuff People are sharing us going around And someone when anytime someone was To kind of start kind of crying when they were telling their story Holson would chime in and it would be like he had AIDS he had AIDS he had he had AIDS and the whole place would die laughing do you know he was a homosexual he had AIDS I mean bro even Jeff Scott's sister on there everybody is dying and it was like And Jeff was open about that.

[2434] I'm not trying to out him or anything, and he would tell you this story.

[2435] Well, he had HIV, but he was, he had taken that medication, and he was testing negative.

[2436] Those protease inhibitors, the medication they have for HIV is amazing.

[2437] Oh, you can beat everything now.

[2438] Yeah, well, HIV for sure.

[2439] But that was like, dude, I just, that was commenting to me when it was like, it was just this safe space, we're all there.

[2440] Yeah.

[2441] And you could say whatever you want.

[2442] But you knew that he was saying it for fun.

[2443] and that we would know it, and we would understand it.

[2444] So it was a seriously risky thing to say.

[2445] Yeah.

[2446] If you looked at it in quotes in a newspaper article, it would be horrific.

[2447] Yeah.

[2448] But in the moment, it was magic, right?

[2449] Oh, it was totally magic.

[2450] I'll never forget when, uh, do you remember Susan Smith, the lady who drowned her kids?

[2451] She drowned her kids and she blamed it on someone else.

[2452] She, like, said, like, someone took her kids and killed them.

[2453] Oh.

[2454] Joey Deos was on stage, like, a week later.

[2455] I heard those were bad kids.

[2456] I heard they sat that close to the TV They didn't put away their blocks They were spilling their fucking milk Those kids will not be missed Those kids will not be missed And you can see the people in the OR Just going, what the fuck?

[2457] After 9 -11 Mitzie would not let Holtzman on stage for two weeks Because she knew it could get weird No, don't let him up She knew He wouldn't be able to help himself He would say something fucked up so she didn't give them any spots for like two weeks.

[2458] Don't let them up.

[2459] Dude, I miss going in the back and seeing Joey sitting on that freezer.

[2460] You and Redvan over by that post over there talking.

[2461] Some crazy UFC fighter was going to come in that night and everybody was all excited.

[2462] I remember when Al Jermaine Sterling came in one night and people were so excited to see him.

[2463] I just remember all it was just, there was so many little things going on.

[2464] It was just magic.

[2465] Well, we want to recreate that here.

[2466] I want to make our own version of that.

[2467] Yeah.

[2468] I bought a club.

[2469] That's what I heard.

[2470] I'll tell you everything when we get off.

[2471] I'll end this and I'll tell you everything.

[2472] But it's very exciting.

[2473] We've closed on a building.

[2474] We're in the middle of construction.

[2475] Everything's happening, you know.

[2476] Got Adam out here.

[2477] Curtis is out here.

[2478] Oh, you get him in a little bit.

[2479] Eric.

[2480] You got Eric here.

[2481] Yeah, we got Eric.

[2482] Eric came to help us.

[2483] Yeah, we got, it's awesome, man. We're very excited.

[2484] and we got a lot of things happening here.

[2485] It's, it's, the ball's rolling in the perfect direction.

[2486] And the, the goal for the clubs, do it the right way.

[2487] Just have, like, a place that 100 % supports comedy.

[2488] Yeah.

[2489] Not think about it like some business we're trying to, like, make the most amount of money off the customers.

[2490] Uh -uh.

[2491] It's just about comedy.

[2492] Because I make my money from other stuff.

[2493] Right.

[2494] I'm not trying to make money off that.

[2495] Right.

[2496] I'm not thinking of it as a business where I'm trying to get rich.

[2497] I'm thinking it as a thing where I'm trying to support this art form that I love.

[2498] and then hopefully get as many people to move out here as I can gang man well Theo von fuck Nashville keep me look hey come on man you're one of my fucking all stars you're one of my goals to get here well thank you man it would be look I'm honored to be a part of the of the group so listen we'd love to have you let's do it once once we're up and running I will send the bad signal if you want to buy the house I bought then that the hell I think you'd sell it I'll sell it I'll buy it There we go.

[2499] Now we're talking.

[2500] All right, now we're talking.

[2501] All right.

[2502] Let's wrap this bitch up because I got to pee.

[2503] Okay.

[2504] I love you, man. I love you too, man. I got the new Netflix special.

[2505] People can check it out.

[2506] That's right.

[2507] Tell everybody, what's the name of it?

[2508] It's just called regular people.

[2509] It's on Netflix.

[2510] And how many Netflix specials do you have right now?

[2511] I got two.

[2512] Two.

[2513] And the first time I was ever on here was when I had my first one.

[2514] So thank you for having me back on.

[2515] My pleasure.

[2516] And, yeah, we filmed it at the Rhymen in Nashville, man. Oh, that's a great fucking place.

[2517] Oh, that's beautiful.

[2518] That place is That's Bill Burr filmed One of his specials there too Yeah he did The Ryman's the shit That's a great place Thank you very much My pleasure brothers Great team Bye everybody