Ed Sheeran

[0] Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert.

[1] I'm Dan Rathers, and I'm joined by Monaster Mouse.

[2] You know, your name in my phone now is Dan Rather.

[3] It is.

[4] Yeah.

[5] Okay, so if you find Monica's phone and you want my number, look under Dan Rathers.

[6] That's right.

[7] That's where it is.

[8] Or I suppose if they hack your phone.

[9] Uh -oh.

[10] Ooh.

[11] Today we have what was really felt like a Hail Mary pass.

[12] Yes.

[13] We were going to be in England, and it kind of was like, who would we want in England.

[14] And I'll say the very first thing I says, I just really wish we could get Ed Sharon.

[15] The best.

[16] And by God, we did.

[17] Not only did we get them.

[18] I need people to know.

[19] I went through a third party to connect us.

[20] Sean Mendez.

[21] Thank you, Sean.

[22] Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[23] They're buddies.

[24] They're bros. As Sean was saying in his interview, he's kind of a mentor for Sean.

[25] So I had low expectations.

[26] Like, A, I hate asking you.

[27] You'd ask me if he's interesting.

[28] You had already been working out.

[29] I want to make it really clear.

[30] You were already setting it up.

[31] But the time frame wasn't going to work all over there.

[32] Anyways, within 10 minutes of asking Sean, I get an email from Ed.

[33] I would love to do your show.

[34] When are you going to be in England?

[35] You should eat here if you need some help getting in this restaurant.

[36] Let me know.

[37] And I was like, could this be real this guy?

[38] What a kind, kind person.

[39] I'm telling you, I just adored him.

[40] I loved their conversation.

[41] And again, someone I didn't really realize the full scope of how incredibly successful.

[42] Yes.

[43] He is.

[44] So Ed Sharon is a four -time Grammy Award -winning singer, songwriter, and record producer.

[45] He is also one of the stand.

[46] out in Game of Thrones.

[47] That's right.

[48] That'll be a topic.

[49] And it should be noted, we recorded this in the upstairs of his pub.

[50] Yes.

[51] He has an adorable pub called Birdie Blossoms.

[52] Yes.

[53] So we did this at his bar, Bertie Blossoms, which was so fun.

[54] And then the wife of his manager is incredible.

[55] She made, while we were doing this interview, a 12 -course meal?

[56] A feast.

[57] East.

[58] Short rib lasagna.

[59] I mean, it was unbelievable.

[60] From scratch.

[61] Yes.

[62] I've thought about that lasagna like six or seven times since we've left London.

[63] How could you not?

[64] The whole experience was fantastic.

[65] But of course, he was there to talk about his new album equals.

[66] And on Ed's new album equals, he seamlessly captures both the intimate and every day and is the fourth installment of his symbol album series.

[67] So cool.

[68] And we love talking to him.

[69] He specializes in real talk as conclusively.

[70] I also think.

[71] Mixed messages.

[72] Please enjoy, Ed, Sharon.

[73] And Ed, thank you, brother, if you happen to listen to this.

[74] Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now.

[75] Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.

[76] Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts.

[77] I sort of came in the music industry.

[78] And a lot of the people that I had picked up guitar because of, I met Eric Clapton and he was lovely.

[79] I met Damien Rice and he was lovely.

[80] But there was some people in the British music industry that were just real dicks to me, like real dicks and really wanted me to fail.

[81] And one of them, I remember I was at the Brit Awards and I'd won't my first award.

[82] And I was with my dad and we were like, yeah, we won.

[83] And he came up and he sat down and was like, I don't think your music's any good.

[84] But if you worked with me, it could be a lot better.

[85] And I'm like, why can't you just say congratulations, man?

[86] Or even at least trying not to be manipulative.

[87] Just tell me you'd love to work with me. And that's flattering.

[88] You don't have to shit on me to say that.

[89] Or don't say anything.

[90] Yeah, exactly.

[91] But anyway, knowing that, coming through the industry, all I wanted was the people that I'd come through learning their songs, just to even just be like, he's working hard.

[92] When Sean came through, I tried to sign him originally.

[93] Oh, you did?

[94] Yeah, I tried to sign him originally.

[95] So a friend of mine was like, check out this kid.

[96] He picked up guitar because of you.

[97] His first song he learned was a team.

[98] So when he was coming through, knowing that so many people have made me feel like shit, I was like, do you know what?

[99] Whatever the scenario, even if it becomes bigger than me and more successful, I just want to be there for him.

[100] I just want to be...

[101] I wouldn't even say I'm a mentor because I'm not, where he's at the same level as me in my career.

[102] We are...

[103] But you're a bit older than him.

[104] Yeah, but we are peers.

[105] I'm not like, hey, what you should do is this.

[106] It's just we're peers, but it's a very healthy way of doing it now.

[107] Whenever there's a new artist that comes through, especially if they're a boy with a guitar, especially, because that's usually who I'm pitted against.

[108] They usually go, oh, it's the new so -and -so, and they're coming through.

[109] I just make sure the moment that I hear the song, I message them and go, hey, I love this tune.

[110] And then you start a relationship with this person, and then you end up rooting for them.

[111] And I kind of learned it from Elton John.

[112] I was just going to suggest that that's what he's famous for, right?

[113] Yeah.

[114] And he will forever be the guy.

[115] Yeah.

[116] And the guys that shatter me when I came through, like I bumped into one of them at a TV.

[117] show the other week.

[118] And I was just like, now I'm on the same level as you.

[119] I don't even want to fucking speak to you.

[120] Like, you were, you were the guy.

[121] Yeah.

[122] And then you were a bit of a dick.

[123] And now, like, there's nothing that you can do to change the way I feel about you.

[124] Yeah.

[125] I saw you when it counted before I was worth caring about.

[126] Yeah.

[127] But Elton just does that.

[128] And I think now, like, he's currently sitting at number two in the UK charge.

[129] He's 74.

[130] He's still on radio and people still loving it.

[131] And he's because he's not bitter and he's not trying to take people down.

[132] He's not like, oh, this person's getting more successful than I am and fuck them.

[133] I'm going to tear them down.

[134] And I think that's a good way to be.

[135] So on the Sean thing, our relationship started like that, just me being like, hey, just like reach out if you need any advice.

[136] Can I ask a logistical question?

[137] Yeah.

[138] How do you get everyone's number?

[139] I have their email.

[140] But how do you get their email?

[141] Like you hear, you hear Sean, he was inspired by you and you're like, you know what I'm going to be a good guy and reach out to him?

[142] How do you get a whole?

[143] The guy that played me him first, he was like, you should try and sign him.

[144] So that was how.

[145] I originally got to know him.

[146] But he was like 15 at this point.

[147] Like, he was young.

[148] I flew him out to Los Angeles, took him and his bum for dinner.

[149] Yeah.

[150] There's no one you can't get in contact with.

[151] There's always six degrees of separation.

[152] We just had a guest on that.

[153] I said, there's a strata in Hollywood where somehow they get everyone's number.

[154] Like, I'm not at that strata, but I'll get a text every now and then from a you.

[155] Or one time I was laying in bed and my phone rang.

[156] I don't know why I answered it.

[157] I didn't recognize the number.

[158] I didn't know her.

[159] Pick it up.

[160] Hello.

[161] Hi, it's Ellen DeGeneris.

[162] And I just, how did she get my number?

[163] But someone has the master file or something.

[164] Well, I mean, usually Elton's the guy.

[165] Yeah, he's got all.

[166] I wanted to meet David Hockney as an artist that I have loved since I was a kid.

[167] I was sort of born near the town where he grew up in and I spent my youth going to galleries and seeing his stuff.

[168] So it got to a point where I was in Los Angeles a lot.

[169] I knew he lived there.

[170] I was like, who do I know that could know David Hockney?

[171] And I was like, I'm sure Elton probably got.

[172] And yeah, he did.

[173] So I ended up getting to meet him through Elton.

[174] But Elton, because he does his aid foundation gigs and because he's obviously been in the industry for like 50 years.

[175] And he's Elton John.

[176] Yeah, but I think mostly the eight foundation gigs because everyone's played them and everyone goes to them and he did the diamond tiara ball and all of that stuff.

[177] So he's plugged in with everybody.

[178] Personal connection, yeah.

[179] It was BJ Novak.

[180] Oh, it was.

[181] It was BJ, yeah.

[182] Because he was talking about Mindy and how, like, Beyonce sent Mindy all these flowers.

[183] Right, and you're like, oh, Beyonce can just get your address.

[184] Yeah, I just got some flowers.

[185] Oh, is Beyonce sending out a bunch of flowers?

[186] Do you know, it was because of the video for Vogue?

[187] And I think Mindy did something for Vogue, didn't she?

[188] Oh, she probably did.

[189] The 40th video, yeah.

[190] But yeah, my wife texted me the other day, because I've done some of Beyonce in with her.

[191] But, like, every now and then there'll be stuff that turns up.

[192] My wife texts me, and she's like, who's beat?

[193] I'm like, I think.

[194] Wait, this is probably supposed to come out.

[195] way later in the show, but we're on Beyonce, and I have to ask, like, are you able to be present when you're on stage with Beyonce knowing, like, oh, I'm on a song with Beyonce, I'm next to her, we're equals right now.

[196] Like, can you process that?

[197] Do you know, I'd say more so in the rehearsals is when it's like, oh my God, this is like, but I think when you're on stage with anyone of that ilk, you have to just be in the zone and bring your A game because then you don't get to do it again.

[198] Is there a version of yourself that exist on stage?

[199] Oh, yeah.

[200] Ego.

[201] That's where ego comes out.

[202] Right.

[203] So the version of you on stage probably can hang with Beyonce all day long.

[204] Well, no, there's still an element of like, she's very, very talented.

[205] She's the most powerful performer.

[206] And she's, yeah, she's easily the best performer that I've been on stage with easily.

[207] But I think this is where people get at the ego conversation confused because I think you do need an ego to walk out on any stage to be like, in your head, I've got this.

[208] And you go out on stage and you look at a crowd and you go, you know what, you're going to be entertained.

[209] And then when you step off stage, you switch it off.

[210] And if you don't switch it off, that's where you Yes.

[211] I think in those scenarios, like the first time I performed with her was for a Stevie Wonder tribute concert.

[212] And I was nervous.

[213] I was nervous.

[214] But also at the same time, I was like, she asked me. So she thinks that I'm good enough to be on stage with her.

[215] So yeah, you kind of walk on with a certain level of like, I got this.

[216] Yeah, yeah.

[217] Confidence.

[218] I really liked what, Sean, in his interview, which was his ego is with him as he's walking out on stage.

[219] His ego's like, first it's insecurity.

[220] Like, do I deserve all these people to have paid to come see?

[221] Am I good enough for that?

[222] And then psyching oneself up and filling yourself with like, fuck yeah, I am.

[223] I'm a lying.

[224] And he says, every time he gets out there, his first note is so off because that's all he's thinking about is his ego.

[225] He said, and then once I do the thing I do, I like to play guitar and thing, everything just falls away.

[226] And now it's just the thing I like to do.

[227] Yeah.

[228] I think with shows, especially, it's good to remind yourself that people there are there to see you.

[229] Yeah.

[230] Like, at any point in the show, even if I'm like, oh, what do I do next?

[231] I'm like, play a song that they know.

[232] And then everything's good again.

[233] Ego's a weird thing, though.

[234] It's a weird thing because it's something that is kind of an ugly word.

[235] But I think ego should actually just be confidence.

[236] Well, I think it's like every single thing in the world.

[237] It's like it's got a great side and it's got an evil side and you got to really try to figure out how to mitigate the downside and profit on the good side.

[238] Well, I think it's use it at the right moments to be self -assured that the thing that you're doing is good and worth it, but never use it to put anyone else down.

[239] So as I was learning about you over the last few days, the thing I'm really envious of you is, so I was with a girl for nine years, Bree, love her to death, and she was long for the whole ride.

[240] Like show up in LA, 10 years of auditioning, never getting a goddamn thing.

[241] We were together for two years while I was kind of succeeding and I didn't work out for all these different reasons.

[242] And I was heartbroken with the notion that I'm going to potentially spend my life with someone that didn't know me before.

[243] Like when I learned that you're with your high school sweetheart, I'm so in a weird way jealous of that.

[244] Yeah, but I think I wouldn't be unless I, like I dated girls in between.

[245] and I feel that I learn a lot about dating and I think had I dated Cherry from the age...

[246] Oh, it would have been a disaster.

[247] Yeah.

[248] Because I did have a high school girlfriend who the first album's about weirdly, we're all still friends and we'd go on a holiday together.

[249] It's all very...

[250] Oh my gosh, a holiday.

[251] It's all very 2020.

[252] But yeah, I think the same thing, man. I was with her for four years, my first girlfriend.

[253] And then I think with Chez, it wasn't planned.

[254] It wasn't.

[255] planned she was someone that you know friends right really close friends yeah she was in in a friendship group she got a scholarship to an american university and i went on tour so we just lost touch she went to duke and played field hockey there very fancy and then i got lonely on tour really lonely because it was just me on stage and i took my best friend loren on tour with me and so she we just hung out and then one day she was in new york and she went to go and hang out with cherry because jerry worked on Wall Street, and then she was like, Oh, Cherry's Eborn's in town.

[256] Do you want to hang out?

[257] It's like, yes.

[258] And in my head, the last time I'd seen Cherry, we'd hooked up.

[259] So in my head, I was like, I wonder if she remembers that.

[260] Because it was like a while ago.

[261] Yeah.

[262] And she did.

[263] And like, very innocent.

[264] Sure, sure, sure, sure.

[265] We would call it like three minutes in a closet, kind of in the States.

[266] Or spin the bottles.

[267] Sure, like just a gentle hookup.

[268] Yeah, very, Jay.

[269] I mean, it was a kiss.

[270] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[271] I think there's so many identity traps on the road that you're on.

[272] You develop a professional kind of confidence that maybe you don't have in real life.

[273] And is there some kind of, like, comfort in knowing, like, oh, yeah, yeah, this girl's known me from the get.

[274] Kind of.

[275] So we live in the town that we grew up in.

[276] Yeah.

[277] And her parents live 10 minutes from me. And my parents live, like, two minutes from me and her, our best friends in the entire world.

[278] live 15 minutes from us.

[279] They've just had a baby as well and it's all like very wholesome.

[280] But I feel like I am the me that I was when I grew up when I'm there.

[281] And then when I come to London, it's like you just have this switch that is, I describe it like putting on Spider -Man's outfit because you suddenly become this person that no one recognizes when you go back.

[282] Because everyone in my hometown is people that I grew up with, the people who work at the pub, went to my school, the people who work, cafe went to my school, the people who work in the supermarket.

[283] Like, I know everyone.

[284] So I'm pretty invisible there.

[285] Whereas when I come to London, it's like everyone.

[286] Yeah.

[287] So I think because we live there, it's normal.

[288] And we just don't go to stuff.

[289] We don't, like, my nightmare would be having to go to an event where other celebrities would be there.

[290] Yeah, yeah.

[291] So we dip in and out.

[292] And if we meet someone we really like, we say, do you want to come to Suffolk and make the journey?

[293] And so, you know, Taylor's been down there.

[294] She and Cherry are great friends.

[295] Yeah, I presume we'll be invited shortly.

[296] I was going to say come, come, come do it down there.

[297] Because I'm actually meant to be there.

[298] I was meant to go last night, but I stayed to do.

[299] So I was going to suggest come there.

[300] Oh, that I didn't know whether it was a filmed thing.

[301] And I don't let anyone film in my house.

[302] Yeah, I read your house in your GQ interview as being described as like Neverland, your version of Neverland.

[303] Well, hopefully not.

[304] Tell me what exactly the same.

[305] Well, they didn't say the activities are the same, but.

[306] Yeah, can you tell us with that?

[307] exposing too much personal.

[308] I mean, people know.

[309] In England, planning permission is made public.

[310] So if I want to do anything, it's in the paper.

[311] So I bought the house in 2012.

[312] And then it was just, mate, to be honest, I was like 21, literally just had mattresses on the floor, a TV without a stand.

[313] Like, it was like a, it was a bro house.

[314] And I had six mates that just lived there the whole day.

[315] I mean, it was pretty gross, actually.

[316] Yeah.

[317] Because it was just takeaways.

[318] And then, you know, I just built out.

[319] So I play, Holly Branson, who's Richard Branson's daughter's wedding, in 2011.

[320] And that is what gave me the inspiration for the house, is I was on this private island in BVI's.

[321] And he said every time he had a hit with Virgin Records, he'd build a little bit more and do a little bit more on this.

[322] So I was like, oh, I could get a place.

[323] And then every time I do a tour or have a successful album, I'll just do something else that I want to do.

[324] So the first thing that I did was I built a treehouse that I put music studio in.

[325] The next thing I did was get a small cottage next door so I could have friends stay.

[326] The next thing I did was, I think, a pool, and then I planted 14 ,000 trees and put a lake in the middle of the...

[327] 14 ,000 trees?

[328] Yeah.

[329] I really want to see.

[330] Yeah.

[331] And you have a pub, right?

[332] You've got a pub there.

[333] Yeah, I had a, like, dilapidated barn that I couldn't knock down because it had one beam of wood in it that was from the 1300s.

[334] Oh, wow.

[335] This is England, by the way.

[336] So it had one beam of wood, so it couldn't do anything.

[337] So I put in planning permission to turn it into a barn And I was like, I don't need more space, but I would really, really love a place to go and drink that is close, basically.

[338] So, yeah, I built, I built this pub.

[339] It cuts down on any kind of driving while intoxicated for sure.

[340] Yeah, yeah, precisely.

[341] And also, you know, there's a total separation from the house now, which is good because now I've got a daughter.

[342] My house is this kind of sacred zone that I don't really let people in.

[343] So it's a place where I can, like, if we were to do the interview, we would have to do.

[344] done it in there.

[345] And also, if I have mates around and I want to go to bed at midnight, because I'm getting up at whatever time with my daughter, I'll just leave them in there.

[346] And I feel it's fine.

[347] Like, they kind of take care of themselves.

[348] And yeah, there's no noise in waking Lyra up.

[349] So it's great.

[350] There's like four beers on tap.

[351] What beers are on tap over there?

[352] As an ex -alcoholic, I'm interested in this.

[353] So the one, so the one I drink the most is a local one made by my mate's dad called the Ulcerne brewery.

[354] It's like the local pub.

[355] If I was to go to the pub with someone that's his pub and then he makes a beer for that pub so he makes a one for mine which is the same got guinness okay got aspels cider which is local as well and neck oil do you drink beamish ever no never have you had it no i don't think so i like pbr when i come to america oh it's beautiful it's a paps blue ribbon it's a staple very trusted and they support the uh bull riding association you know yeah without them i don't know what was your drink of choice jack daniels and diet coke with the side of cocaine.

[356] And I love beer.

[357] I fucking love beer.

[358] I love Guinness.

[359] But I remember going with my dad to Ireland.

[360] And my mind, I was like, I'm going to drink Guinness the entire time.

[361] But at some point, I tried a beamish.

[362] And then I just feel raw.

[363] It's like a malt or something.

[364] Oh, my God.

[365] Is it delicious?

[366] I really recommend it.

[367] Yeah, there's different areas, different regions in Ireland that basically just have their own.

[368] Yeah.

[369] I think I looked for it when I got home because I really developed a taste for it, but it didn't work out.

[370] I have a question about this strategy that you adopted from Branson, which is have a little success, build something, and then just over time it turns into something.

[371] But as part of that, like, do you have to trick yourself?

[372] I certainly trick myself into, I have to couple my hard work with some reward.

[373] Yeah.

[374] And you end up playing a mental game because I could just do everything I wanted.

[375] But I know that that'll lead to unhappiness.

[376] Also, you don't value the thing that you...

[377] Absolutely.

[378] If you get it all, yes.

[379] And to some degree, I've done it.

[380] that you know where i'm like i got all the shit and i still don't like myself what i happen why didn't this work out but do you have a methodology by which you kind of reward yourself work hard reward do you pepper it out yeah i guess so and it's with memories rather than because i did that as well of the why don't i like myself i yeah yeah yeah it's memories and i do it i do it based around wine my thing if i if i do something i'll have a bottle of wine that i want to try and i don't want to be like and just buy a nice bottle of wine and then just drink it on a Thursday night kind of thing.

[381] So I have a bottle of wine that I want to try.

[382] Something gets achieved.

[383] I'll get the wine.

[384] I'll decant it for exactly the right time.

[385] And I'll go for dinner with my wife somewhere and we'll have that.

[386] And then on the bottle, we write, this is what happens at this dinner.

[387] This is the date.

[388] This is the restaurant.

[389] We did it.

[390] I'll write my name and she writes her name.

[391] And then I have a shelf at home, which has all of them.

[392] So all my achievements are now just signed bottles of wine.

[393] Oh, I like that.

[394] I should do that.

[395] I adopted it from a friend, my friend that passed away in March did it.

[396] You're Australian from it?

[397] Yeah, Michael.

[398] And he had just, his whole house is just covered in these bottles.

[399] And you would go and he'd be like, this is the night with Springsteen and this is the night with Franks and Archer or whatever.

[400] And there are all these signed bottles that he had.

[401] And I thought that was a wonderful idea.

[402] And I'm so glad that I adopted it because I'd started it with him.

[403] So I've got, you know, 30 bottles at home with nights that we had that I could, when he passed away, I could look at and be like, oh, remember this.

[404] Remember this.

[405] Remember this.

[406] So, yeah, it's a good thing to do.

[407] For me, it is still materialistic, because you still want it special.

[408] You know, it has some value that you wouldn't just normally.

[409] Yeah.

[410] Oh, like, research the wine properly.

[411] There are some wines that they don't sell people because they think you're going to buy them and then hold on to them as an investment and sell them.

[412] So a lot of the time I have to send a picture of the cork out.

[413] Oh, wow.

[414] To be like, look, I have actually to prevent people from like trying to corner the market and drive up the price.

[415] This sounds so limited.

[416] I'm jealous.

[417] into wine.

[418] She's a whino.

[419] I love, I love wine.

[420] But also, that's such a beautiful way of keeping gratitude, because then you can just look at all these bottles and be like, also it's not like, if you've had a nice bottle of wine, I always find it so mad.

[421] Someone has a nice bottle of wine and then the bottle is chucked out.

[422] The bottle's like so beautiful.

[423] Yeah.

[424] So true.

[425] You know what I call that in life?

[426] I call it eventizing things.

[427] And there's something wonderful about that.

[428] Like, because I guess, well, it's like everything in life.

[429] You have a daughter now.

[430] You're going to get exactly out of it what you put into it.

[431] There's no shortcut.

[432] There's no like, I can buy this thing and it's the work, it's the presence, it's the thing.

[433] And so when you put a bunch of effort into something that the rewards bigger, even if it's like researching it and then decanting it correctly, like the whole thing.

[434] I love the whole process.

[435] Yeah.

[436] And like for my daughter's birth because Cherry, she was breastfeeding so she could have like a tiny touch of the lips of wine, but they do tiny, tiny bottles of wine.

[437] So they then on the shelf you have this tiny bottle Or it's like, you know, like small, and yeah, so my whole house is basically covered in bottles of wine with.

[438] One funny thing about that wine story, which I really like is his friend was coming from Australia.

[439] He was going to stay at their house for a couple weeks.

[440] And he thought, oh, you know, I got to be prepared.

[441] So I'm going to get him the bottles of wine he drinks.

[442] And he drinks two or three bottles of wine.

[443] So I'm going to need whatever it was, 45 bottle or 200 bottles.

[444] And I assumed because he drank, well, he drunk it like it was water.

[445] And he'd drink it out of paper cups, like just like coffee, cup, coffee, cup.

[446] Not eventizing it.

[447] Yeah, no, it was just like his thing.

[448] He would just always have a bottle of Penfold 707.

[449] And so I was kind of like, he was staying with me for like a week.

[450] So I was like, I'm going to get a lot.

[451] I think I've got third, no, more than 36.

[452] I want to say I read 40, but whatever.

[453] It was a lot.

[454] It was enough that we didn't get through it.

[455] And then two years later when he passed away, I drunk the last seven bottles with my dad over that week.

[456] But I assumed they were like $20 because he drunk them like.

[457] because they were $20, but they were $400 bottles of wine.

[458] And so I was just like, yeah, can you get these?

[459] And then I get the bill.

[460] And I'm like, Michael, fucking hell.

[461] Yeah, 40 times 400 pounds is like 16 ,000.

[462] Oh, wow.

[463] Penfold actually, when he passed away, they sent me a bunch.

[464] I actually have to thank them.

[465] I mean, I thank them privately, but publicly they sent me like 100 bottles that are now just have in my cellar.

[466] And any time I think about him, I go down and get one and open one.

[467] It's really nice.

[468] Wait, it's called Penfold?

[469] Penfold 707, yeah.

[470] Yeah, I'm going to buy you one.

[471] They do, they have a California one now.

[472] And they're like, they have like entry level wine, which would be like, I think it's, I think it's like $15.

[473] But then their high, high end one is like $700 or something like that.

[474] Okay, I want to go back to identity for one second.

[475] So when you did Hot Ones, which by the way, great job.

[476] I love that you're on Hot Wins.

[477] I'm going to brag.

[478] Can I interrupt you for two seconds?

[479] Yeah.

[480] Hot Ones shouldn't be the show where you eat hot chicken and, you know, and you're interviewed, it should be the documentary of the day afterwards.

[481] Oh, sure, sure, sure, sure.

[482] Fuck me, man. I had to fly to Greece, right?

[483] With my infant daughter and my pee burn.

[484] Oh.

[485] The other end burned.

[486] I'm like, I've got cold sweat.

[487] I mean, it was...

[488] It's an experience.

[489] Oh, man. And I was like, this should be the documentary.

[490] You should then have a film crew.

[491] You've done it, right?

[492] Well, I'm going to brag to you.

[493] I'm kind of a legend on that show because I ask for more wings.

[494] and I did more of the hottest just to kind of really make my mark.

[495] Did you test his though?

[496] Because I swapped with his and then he started struggling.

[497] His was still spicy.

[498] His were still spicy.

[499] But when I've watched it before, he doesn't really struggle and he was struggling the day that I was doing.

[500] Yeah, he got up in the middle.

[501] Well, poor thing has to do this every day.

[502] I keep thinking, I'm like, how is he doing this?

[503] His insides must be like ruined.

[504] Swiss cheese.

[505] Swiss cheese.

[506] It's a mess in there.

[507] It's like a fucking colander, his lower GI.

[508] So you're known as the guy that asked him all.

[509] I'm kind of legendary.

[510] Yeah, yeah.

[511] But what I want on to say, and also the most unique experience ever, it's like I had had hot food where it's burning my lips on the way in.

[512] And then on the exhaust, of course, the next day, it's burning that.

[513] But fucking, I could feel those wings move through my entire intestinal tract.

[514] I'm like, oh, that whole meal's on this side now.

[515] Because it's literally burning your insides as it's traveling.

[516] I like spice.

[517] Yeah.

[518] I like spice.

[519] But like that de bomb one, it's just not pleasant.

[520] It just doesn't taste of anything.

[521] It's a mean product.

[522] It's aggressive.

[523] It's mean.

[524] I don't see the point.

[525] What's the value?

[526] No one could enjoy that.

[527] You talked about the Eric Clapton history, which I find really cool.

[528] He loves Eric Clapton.

[529] He's his guy.

[530] He would encourage him to start playing the guitar.

[531] And at some point, Eric gave him a guitar.

[532] Then a studio burnt down.

[533] Then it had to get refurbished for a year.

[534] And now it's still, it's in existence.

[535] And it's still got his signature on the back.

[536] And it smells like a barbecued sausage, probably from Texas, smoked.

[537] Yeah, it smells really good.

[538] But you were telling the story about you were on stage with somebody.

[539] and you thought to yourself, and you describe yourself this way as being very geeky in high school and that probably if you pulled your classmates, they would have picked you last to be on stage with this.

[540] Oh, 50 Cent.

[541] No, it was doing a song with Eminem 50 Cent, and rapping on it.

[542] Not only am I British, middle class, white, from a country farming town.

[543] Yeah.

[544] And I, in my head, was always like, I'm going to do a song with Eminem, and I'm going to rap on it.

[545] And in my head, that was always, like, from like, from like 15.

[546] And I was like, that's going to happen.

[547] It's going to happen.

[548] And I remember saying it to my dad.

[549] And God bless him.

[550] And he said, yeah, it will.

[551] Yeah, it will.

[552] God bless him.

[553] I would have been like, bud, you got to prepare for that not to happen.

[554] My dad was so wonderful in it because he was always my number one supporter.

[555] And he never told me that when he played my music to his friends, they were like, oh, this isn't good.

[556] And I found out recently that, like, he just shielded all of that for me. He always was just like, they loved it, which gives you confidence.

[557] And eventually you get better and better.

[558] it and better and better.

[559] Yeah, a performance is literally 90 % confidence.

[560] Well, this is why I think camera phones, right?

[561] Someone said, I can't remember who said this.

[562] I remember being on stage, age 12, playing sweet child of mine.

[563] And I remember being like, I am slush.

[564] I loved it.

[565] It was amazing, the crowd.

[566] I could have crowds up.

[567] There's probably like five people there.

[568] Sure, sure.

[569] And I'm sure if someone had filmed that on a camera phone and I watched it back age 12, I'd be like, oh, man, that actually, that wasn't as good as I was.

[570] And I feel like, camera.

[571] phones are ruining the confidence level of kids, because you can watch back and be like, even if you're like at a dance recital, you can be like, I rocked that.

[572] And then you watch it back and be like, oh, man. That actually wasn't as sick as I remembered.

[573] Oh my God.

[574] This reminds me, this is so funny.

[575] Nate took one of my best friends.

[576] He was in college and he went to a party, like a sorority party.

[577] And he said he was dancing.

[578] He goes, I've never been more on fire.

[579] Everyone there was feeling.

[580] I was just fucking dancing.

[581] It was like the night of my life.

[582] And someone had VHS taped it back then in like 91.

[583] He said he watched it the next day And he realized like his dance moves Were like the African Aneter Dance from Can't Buy Me Love Like he looked like a fucking dork Crazy He had lived with this fantasy that he had crushed it And dancing is all about not giving a fight It's all about just letting go And then the next time this is what's sad The next time he dances he'll be like Yes exactly I can't let go Yes exactly It's best not to ever see that I went to my friend's 30th The other week But the dance floor was empty But Dancing Queen came on Abbas So I was like, I'm going for a solo mission.

[584] And I had the best night of my life, but my best mate, Nick, thought it was so funny.

[585] He filmed it.

[586] And I watched, again, watched it back in the next day and was like, oh.

[587] It was a little different outside than it was in my head.

[588] It is hard with these young people who start on YouTube and stuff like that.

[589] Like, you have to be perfect right out the gates.

[590] Like, you don't have time.

[591] Sean was playing to sort of 5 ,000 kids because he was so big on Vine.

[592] Yeah.

[593] That his fan base, I remember, like, his first gigs were to, like, three, four thousand people.

[594] And then it was like arenas.

[595] And you have to really catch up quick.

[596] And it's a lot of pressure, a lot of eyes, you know?

[597] The most.

[598] I mean, you don't have time to, there's no fucking up in small rooms.

[599] Like everyone is so, failure is so important for success.

[600] I've learned nothing from success.

[601] I learned everything from my failures.

[602] That's the premise of this show.

[603] Yeah.

[604] I mean, literally, what could I learn from someone's accomplishment?

[605] Like, if you want a Grammy, that doesn't help me at all.

[606] If you were a shitty dad yesterday and you're bummed about it and you figured it out and then you got a trick to get out of it.

[607] That's what I want to hear.

[608] I'm my dad who fucks up.

[609] Dude, I felt it on, because my goal for so many years was Wembley Stadium, Wembley Stadium, Wembley Stadium, sell out Wembley Stadium, Wembley Stadium, and then I was on stage at Wembley Stadium and I came off stage and was like, I feel nothing.

[610] But the route to Wembley, I felt everything.

[611] I was like energized.

[612] I was like, yes.

[613] And actually there was one moment I felt very human on stage at Wembley Stadium.

[614] I use a loop station and my whole gig is based around this loop station, and it shut off mid -song.

[615] And then I was like, what do I do?

[616] Oh, wow.

[617] So I sung an a cappella song while they fixed it.

[618] But that moment, again, was failure and then succeeded.

[619] And that's what made up made me feel.

[620] But yeah, it's.

[621] But you need to sometimes, like, again, I grew up doing comedy.

[622] Like, there's a lot of shows that think fucking God they had been recorded because the evidence would suggest I suck.

[623] But really, you're just learning.

[624] But when you bomb, when you bomb, you go, okay, that.

[625] that joke didn't work.

[626] And then you get to a point where you're on stage doing standout and you kill every time because you've had so many failures leading up to them.

[627] That's a good premise for the show, man. That's good.

[628] Because I say to kids, whenever they say, what's your best bit of advice?

[629] I always say, obviously, choose someone you admire and work harder than them, write songs every day, gig every day.

[630] And I was like, dare to suck.

[631] Like, go in and be like, do you know what?

[632] This song might suck or step on stage and dare to suck.

[633] If you suck, you won't suck next time.

[634] Or you won't suck five times after them.

[635] I'm a writer as well.

[636] And the only tip I have for people who want to write is, like, give yourself permission to write something terrible.

[637] Because the issue isn't writing something terrible.

[638] It's starting writing.

[639] That's it.

[640] Do you ever write something terrible?

[641] And then someone else is like, oh, my God.

[642] Like, in your head, are you like, this is rubbish in this?

[643] Shape of you?

[644] I stand by it.

[645] I still don't think that song fits on that album.

[646] Wait, what?

[647] He doesn't think Shape of You.

[648] He thought Shape of You was going to tank.

[649] Oh, my God.

[650] Isn't that fantastic?

[651] Oh, my God.

[652] What I have is I have a hard time getting started because I want it to be great.

[653] And that wanting it to be great can be very arresting.

[654] And that's the only real battle to fight as a writer is just yourself.

[655] You got to sit down and start typing.

[656] And dare to suck, yeah.

[657] You can write a song that sucks and no one's going to listen to it.

[658] Who gives a shit?

[659] In the moment, like I remember, what was the song I wrote?

[660] I think it might have even been bad habits.

[661] I remember being so buzzed about bad habits.

[662] And then at the end of the day, writing a shitty song.

[663] And then going home being like, like, oh, man, I can't write songs.

[664] Yeah, it's an identity.

[665] It can, like, shatter your identity.

[666] That's the fear.

[667] It's like, oh, if I can't do it, then I can't do it ever.

[668] Yes.

[669] Here's the analogy I would make.

[670] I just thought of it while you were saying that is if you're an athlete, right, and you're competing for the Olympics, and you thought, I can't start my workout today because it's going to be a bad workout.

[671] Not an option.

[672] You just got to work out if you're going to, it's the muscle.

[673] So it's like literally it's just going to the gym.

[674] You're not hoping you get the perfect fucking workout.

[675] You just know that's what you've got to do to eventually go, somewhere and compete.

[676] That's a very good point, yeah.

[677] Stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare.

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[692] What you said on the hot ones about Fiddy and Eminem is that your classmates wouldn't have thought you would have been there and that you were geeky.

[693] And then I read that your classmates also voted you most likely to become famous.

[694] Yeah.

[695] So do you think...

[696] There's a gap.

[697] No, there's a gap between what you think and what people think.

[698] No, no, no. It was the hip -hop version that seemed crazy for them.

[699] Yeah.

[700] I think people thought that I would make success out of music.

[701] But even now, people wonder how I do songs with people.

[702] So people who they would consider like super cool.

[703] Even now, they'll be like, how did he get on a song with Travis Scott?

[704] Or how did he get Tion Wayne and Central C to do it?

[705] Well, really quick, can I ask you a question?

[706] Do you think anyone thinks that?

[707] Or do you think you think they think that?

[708] No, I think people think that.

[709] I think people think that.

[710] I think in the music industry, there's like cool clubs.

[711] I think because I make pop music, people think I'm not in the cool club.

[712] but sometimes I'm writing music for the cool club behind the scenes absolutely well I don't know I just talk for myself people don't think nearly as bad about me as I'm positive they do in fact I almost start every sentence defensively in fact the name of this podcast was going to be the millionth podcast not armchair expert because I was already embarrassed that so many people had already done it and I'm just hopping in now I'm a fucking poser and I'm going to beat you to the burn on me yeah I know this is the one millionth podcast but I think it's good to be self -aware as well I don't necessarily think people think bad on me. But I do think there's a hell of a lot of people that want me to fail.

[713] It's crabs in a barrel.

[714] Do you know the crabs in a barrel mentality?

[715] Tell me crabs in a barrel.

[716] Crabbs, you put crabs in a barrel of water and all the crabs will help one crab get to the top.

[717] And then when it's at the top, they drag it back down and they get the next crab and they help that.

[718] And that is, I feel, I don't want to shit on my country.

[719] I love, I love living here, but they love an underdog.

[720] Sure.

[721] And they hate.

[722] A winner.

[723] Do you know what they hate?

[724] They hate a nice winner.

[725] they hate someone who they're like oh fuck like i can't hate him but i do hate he's not really that no they see every aspect of my life as like a PR exercise sure so the fact that my kind of whole shtick has been people being like oh he's so normal and he feels like you can go for a pint with him or whatever and i feel like people think that that is a carefully crafted design and calculated calculated thing yeah i've seen that you've objected to people suggesting you do things for money, which I don't know why they would suggest that, assuming they know somewhat that you've done just fine.

[726] You probably have passed the point where you're trying to keep the heat on.

[727] I don't do private shows.

[728] I'm not saying I never would, but like, I'm not going to play for some, like, warlords.

[729] What if I told you I had $800 cash money to play at my daughter's birthday part?

[730] I would rather play it for free.

[731] Right, right, right.

[732] This might come back and bite me in the arts and years to come because I might end up playing private shows, but I never like feeling like I'm owned.

[733] I did, I did one.

[734] the beginning of my career, and I turned up, and they gave me my set list.

[735] So when people ask me to play their weddings, I usually say, if I'm free, I'll just come and do it.

[736] And I do.

[737] I do.

[738] Like, you know, I will just turn up at someone's wedding and play and not charge.

[739] Because I think that's more fun.

[740] Yeah.

[741] So I don't necessarily do it for money.

[742] I know my worth.

[743] Well, there's commerce, and then there's doing what you love.

[744] Yeah.

[745] There's two different things.

[746] We're friends with Pete Wentz, and they did a show for like some Russian czars or something fall out pointed and they were like it was atrocious everyone just stood there no one clapped no one did saying no one did anything and they were like we're never ever ever doing this again the best part was is they played a couple of the song you know whatever they had a set list and then at the end they said no you play this replay they wanted them to they ended up playing the same song three days because you're owned for the day exactly the only one actually I've done in 10 years because it was in Hawaii.

[747] And I was like, I want to go to Hawaii.

[748] But that was like a gig that I was booked for.

[749] But like when you're playing to 10 people in a room, right?

[750] And then they say play it again.

[751] And again.

[752] Like, yeah, not for me. Yeah, you feel like a puppet.

[753] A friend of mine went to SeaWorld.

[754] Yeah.

[755] And they have a little amphitheater.

[756] Yeah.

[757] See World is canceled.

[758] Yeah, well, yeah, let's not get bogged down the map.

[759] But a friend of mine was there with his kids and they have a little amphitheater.

[760] It's probably maybe 200 people can sit in it.

[761] And he saw on the sign, Tone Lokes.

[762] playing.

[763] Do you remember tone look?

[764] Funky Cole Medina and Wild Thing?

[765] She likes to do the wild thing.

[766] So according to him, I don't want to get sued.

[767] He played Wild Thing.

[768] Everyone went bonkers.

[769] And then he played Funky Cole Medina.

[770] Everyone went bonkers.

[771] And at the end of Funky Cole Medina, he goes, you all want to hear a wild thing again.

[772] And everyone was crazy.

[773] And he fucking played it again.

[774] And he played three songs and two of them were wild.

[775] Kind of awesome, though.

[776] It's so awesome.

[777] No, your audience.

[778] I mean, I don't know.

[779] I remember I played with Maclemore, and he opens with Can't Hold Us, and then I think ends with this.

[780] Oh, good for him.

[781] Because it just goes, I mean, and don't get me wrong, he has like hits for days.

[782] We interviewed him, we love.

[783] He's right.

[784] He knows what's going to get the crowd hype.

[785] Well, when you said the cool club, I immediately thought of him.

[786] I thought, yeah, that's a victim of the cool club.

[787] But the cool club were, so the cool club, like, he is still hanging out with the people that you think are in the cool club.

[788] Yes, yes, yes, yes.

[789] But some faction of the media has decided.

[790] he's not that and has created this kind of bullshit tension, which we talked about at great length.

[791] Like there's some undercurrent to suggest he's not, despite the reality of it.

[792] I mean, that's the same for me. It'll be the same for Sean.

[793] It would be the same for...

[794] Taylor, does she get that?

[795] I think she did.

[796] I think she reached a level of success with 1989 that people were like, oh, she can't do it again, she can't do it again.

[797] And I think with folklore and Evermore is so back in with the cool club.

[798] she's now kind of transcended all of it yeah you can't like she's done it again and again and again and at a certain point you have to just be like she's really good also just doing that she's just a nice person so like it comes out she'll do like she'll donate to a fan's thing here or she'll do this and like these things come out and the media I felt like they felt they could shit on her for a bit and then eventually they're like you know she won literally that's what happened I don't think there's ever a point, I mean, I can't speak for the future, but I think she's out the other side now.

[799] I don't think there's ever a point where people can be the way they were with her.

[800] Did you watch her doc?

[801] You must have.

[802] Okay, so that's where I went from, you know, my daughter's love her music.

[803] I like some of her songs.

[804] I was whatever.

[805] If I had to do zero to ten interest in her, it was like at a four or five, I watched her doc and just what we were talking about, about me learning from people's struggles.

[806] I went, I fucking love this woman.

[807] I love her honesty.

[808] I love her vulnerability.

[809] I love her fucking truth.

[810] And I talked about this with Sean and I'm going to talk about it with you because I've seen it in you too.

[811] You said, look, man, I did fucking 260 shows and I didn't want to ever do music again.

[812] It ruined my experience.

[813] And what I love about this generation of younger rock stars is like I grew up with Led Zeppelin.

[814] I should aspire to fuck a fish in a hotel room.

[815] Like there's no downside.

[816] There's just fucking fish in hotel rooms.

[817] There's no struggle.

[818] There's no loneliness.

[819] There's no identity crisis.

[820] And the result of that, as you saw, there, isn't a musician from the 60s that wasn't a raging fucking addict because you need relief you have to regulate from the loneliness and the highs of the stage and the loneliness of the hotel and the fucking I love that y 'all are owning the reality of the human experience because I think what gets us all into troubles and I'm going to argue that this is what happened to you with Wimbly we are fantasy creatures we are forward thinking fantasy creatures and we think we're going to feel a certain way you thought in your head for however many years that when you play When I played Wimbly, a magic sensation was going to enter your body in a confidence.

[821] I thought that having a daughter.

[822] I thought everyone said you feel this new love, having a daughter.

[823] And I remember it was a very traumatic birth.

[824] And I remember holding her and being like, when's it going to hit?

[825] When's it going to hit?

[826] And then just gradually, you realize that actually it's not a switch that comes on and it's a new kind of love.

[827] It's you have a totally different.

[828] Because I thought, do you love your daughter more than your wife?

[829] Like, is that the thing?

[830] And it was this bond of real true, emotive love and worry, lots and lots of worry that sort of gradually happens and it becomes stronger and stronger and stronger.

[831] But I assumed, I mean, as you said, you feel like it's this light switch moment where it's like, and now it's this.

[832] Dude, this is across the board.

[833] So Mondays is celebrities, Thursdays is like professors, all the best minds in the world.

[834] Everyone who's gone to Harvard had the exact same experience.

[835] Their entire life was about getting to Harvard.

[836] And then they got to Harvard and they're like, huh, I thought it was going to kind of feel like a scientist.

[837] overnight.

[838] And then I guess after Harvard, they go, and I'm going to have the best job and it's going to go in and I'm going to be a millionaire.

[839] And then when I have money, it's going to feel this way.

[840] That was my lie.

[841] I'm like, oh, if I have money, there's no problems.

[842] Going back to what you were saying about artists have to have something once the stage is over and they have have the high.

[843] I actually think real addiction comes in the off time, in the boredom, when you haven't got anything to do.

[844] When I watched the Amy documentary, like, her addiction got really bad when she was off tour because she would wake up in the morning and be like, well, what do I do today?

[845] I'm not playing a show.

[846] I'm not doing, oh, I'll get high.

[847] And then it turns into I'm on tour and I'm doing it and this is what I need.

[848] But eventually those collide.

[849] Did you watch either of the Whitney Houston documentaries?

[850] I haven't seen it yet.

[851] They're phenomenal.

[852] And she is on a tour like you were on, you know, like they are working that woman and she is in Australia and she's playing for 100 ,000 people and she is actively fucking smoking crack.

[853] And yet she still is getting there.

[854] She's so skinny.

[855] And now it's just all converging.

[856] the addiction and the stage thing and all of it is just like it's a mountain and the Amy thing is really really heartbreaking and again I think she just missed the generation where she could have maybe owned a lot of it and dealt I don't know I don't know I just think what what you guys are doing is so helpful to everybody because there isn't a magic bill there isn't a magic job there isn't a magic accomplishment and you all are being honest about that well you just need to get your head around that maybe the accomplishment is doing what you love for a living.

[857] And like my every day waking up and being like, hey, I get to play guitar today and people are going to go, hey, you're good at that.

[858] That is enough.

[859] That is enough.

[860] And that's why someone like, Sean, for instance, when he's going to stage and he's going, am I enough, am I enough?

[861] And then he stands on stage and goes, oh yeah, people do like this.

[862] I think that accomplishments, and this is the thing with award shows and sort of sales in general and people being like this is what defines you like my new album is not going to sell what divide sold i know that for a fact you know it's a different different time CDs aren't really the thing anymore but still equals equals is out and it's fantastic and everyone should buy multiple copies but my worst by some people will be judged or the album's worth even if the album's so much better it will be judged on yeah what did it sell did it win any grammies what did it do rather than i love it and i'm really proud of it and i hope people listen to it and they like it too.

[863] But the thing that I got into on my first record was it was critically slammed.

[864] I won Brit Awards, but I remember I was like nominated for a Grammy and losing I was like crushed.

[865] Who did you lose to?

[866] Fun.

[867] I lost a fun.

[868] I lost a Maclemore the year after.

[869] I lost 13 Grammys in a row.

[870] Oh, is that a record?

[871] No, maybe.

[872] Anyway, I lost 13 in a row.

[873] I was zero to 13.

[874] When they invite you on the 11th time, are you a little bit like, I'm not fucking going to go there?

[875] Well, this is my point.

[876] This is my point.

[877] On the 14th time, it was my birthday.

[878] And I was like, I don't want to spend my birthday losing.

[879] And so I was, I was like, I'm going to go.

[880] I'm going to book a plane afterwards to take me and my wife to Iceland and I'm going to wake up and jump in the Blue Lagoon and win or lose.

[881] That's my day.

[882] And I won.

[883] And I was there like, I've got to go.

[884] See you guys, there was no celebration.

[885] It was just like, I won and and left.

[886] That might be the healthiest way to do it.

[887] Yeah, and then the next time I won, I woke up here in bed and literally looked on the news and was like, oh, I won.

[888] Okay, so you didn't go to one of the ones you won.

[889] I didn't go to one of them, no. I often find, like, for me, award shows, if I'm not performing, I kind of can't really see the point, because I want to go and perform and people to see a song.

[890] So I'm kind of like, if I'm not playing, I find it difficult to go sit and not.

[891] I just, it really, really makes me feel like shit and I get like real anxiety being around lots of people that I admire that it's the thing where you like you think everyone hates you and I walk into a room and I go these, all of these people don't like, I don't like that feeling.

[892] And it's a lot easier to go and be like, but I'm playing and I'm promoting my record.

[893] But you know, that's not true.

[894] Like everyone in that room.

[895] Well, I was going to ask a my party thing.

[896] People do want me to fail, especially here.

[897] People are waiting for the moment where a song doesn't go to number one thing.

[898] the people in the room at the Grammys who know what's up.

[899] No, no, no, no, no. I know, like, I know, because I, I hear people talk about people who talk about me. And in the moment, it will be like, hey, man, what's going on?

[900] But I know for a fact that people are like, fuck this guy.

[901] Well, but can you write some of that off as just obviously, like, some career envy?

[902] Yeah, of course.

[903] Yeah.

[904] I'm like, I know.

[905] I'm fine with it.

[906] But again, be self -aware.

[907] I'm very self -aware of those things.

[908] And even here, in our music industry in England, where the percentage of people listening has gone up and as a music industry, everyone benefits.

[909] If, say, Colplay or Adele or whoever, they have a successful album, 15 bands that kind of sound like them will get signed and then they'll get a shot and then they'll get on radio because of it.

[910] Well, a rising tide lifts all ships.

[911] Yeah, and, like, some of those ships still want me to fail.

[912] I'm not saying I'm the reason that people have success but there's definitely like when someone gets a hit on radio there's definitely like oh well this is the new something rather and like I don't know I just like I know that I benefited from Paola Nutini and James Blunt from my record label because they were male singer songwriters who got big sold a lot of records and that money went to signing me and making my record and then promoting it and it's just it's a cycle okay back to the wedding thing I want to suggest this is from my own experience If I look at my happiest days of being an actor It's when I was a groundling And I did a show every Sunday And literally nothing could happen from it No one was gonna like I was gonna be great And they were gonna give me a check At the end of it It was just like I did it Because I wanted to be on that stage And then soon as I started doing movies It was like This one's gotta do this much So I can do that one The whole thing shifted And so trying to recapture Why I moved to Los Angeles Which was to be funny the more I can do that, the happier I am.

[913] So, yeah, like, for me, if you played a wedding out of your love for playing, that's such a different experience.

[914] But that's what I do it.

[915] I balance it.

[916] So if you say you did mega, mega, mega million selling movie, go and do a stand -up show on Sunday and remind yourself that you are funny and do it for free.

[917] And then people are like, holy shit, did you see so -and -so turned up to the comedy club?

[918] And he didn't even want to be paid.

[919] He just did it for the love of it.

[920] Yeah.

[921] And I think I do that now, like, every now and then we'll just be like, fuck it.

[922] I want to play a show today, and I will just turn up somewhere and plug in and play.

[923] Well, he does this really cute thing.

[924] Like, there's all these videos of him, like, people playing at a mall or something are out in the park.

[925] And then he just pops in and starts fucking jamming.

[926] I saw this cute picture with all these girls that were doing some kind of singing in public.

[927] And then he rolls up and just starts fucking, now that's the kind of superpower I wish I had where, like, my talent, I could start right now and end in four minutes and give it to somebody and then walk away.

[928] Sounds so dreaming.

[929] How many times you've been at a dinner party and you go, I'm a comedian, they go, tell us a joke.

[930] Oh, they don't have to say, tell me a joke.

[931] I'm giving them way too many jokes.

[932] They're like, can you stop telling us jokes?

[933] I'm going to tell you my favorite one.

[934] And it's just about the delivery.

[935] The joke is not good.

[936] Old man goes for his yearly physical at the doctor.

[937] And the doctor says, I've ran your labs looking at your results.

[938] I've got two really bad pieces of news for you.

[939] Number one, you have cancer.

[940] And number two, you have Alzheimer's.

[941] And he says, well, least it's not cancer.

[942] let me tell you it's not funny to make fun of Alzheimer's what's funny is how positive he is yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah well um that one gets said multiple times on this show along with the underwear one the underwear one i thought you were going to say that oh no the rabbit and the bear bloody underwear i have oh yes one more one more you ready so an old man again goes to his he ragging an old man Exactly.

[943] That's his brand of comedy.

[944] Because that's my fear right now, as I'm slowly turning into it.

[945] Old man goes with his wife to his yearly physical because he's hard of hearing.

[946] She helps out.

[947] And he gets in there and the doctor says, okay, before we get started, we're going to need a blood sample, a urine sample, and a fecal sample.

[948] And he turns to his wife and says, what did he say?

[949] And she said, he wants your underwear.

[950] It's so gross.

[951] That's fucking cool.

[952] Okay.

[953] Old man goes to the dog.

[954] doctors for a checkup.

[955] Actually, middle -aged man. We're not going to rag on an old man. A dad shepherd goes to the doctors for a checkup.

[956] And the doctor does all the tests, all the, you know, putting the electrode things on.

[957] And then he's fine.

[958] And he says, right, you're totally clear.

[959] But, you know, I'm a religious man. And I just want to ask you, what's your connection like with God?

[960] Do you have a good spiritual connection?

[961] He's like, yeah, man. Weird.

[962] Me and God are so close.

[963] Every time I go to the toilet for a pee, he turns the light on.

[964] And when I leave, he turns it off.

[965] Doctor's like, what?

[966] Yeah.

[967] Every time I go to the toilet, turns the light on.

[968] But when I leave, he turns it off.

[969] The doctor's really concerned.

[970] So he rings up the man's wife and he's like, he's got turn on the light for your husband and turn it off when he leaves.

[971] She's like, no, he just pisses in the fridge.

[972] Oh, man, I was trying to predict the end of that joke and I was so off base.

[973] That's great.

[974] Pisses in the fridge.

[975] I meant to say he sleepwalks and pisses in the fridge.

[976] Sorry, we're just turning into it.

[977] No, that's exactly what the show's supposed to do.

[978] It's supposed to get far away from anything you're expecting to hear us talking.

[979] about.

[980] I had a question about in the interviews I've watched you and you have a total comfort and a confidence and it seems to me that you're not terribly concerned about what the fallout is and I was wondering if that is the actual gift of success that you've done well enough that you don't feel the pressure to try to be broadly appealing or try to say something that'll appeal to people.

[981] Like is that the gift of?

[982] No, because I still feel there's pressure to have hits.

[983] No, I mean about being yourself.

[984] Oh, being yourself.

[985] Because, you know, a younger artist who's trying to appeal to the most amount of people if it's possible, they might ask them some question that they knows polarizing or they might think is alienating to some group.

[986] And they can't really, they're not in a position to be that way yet.

[987] I think honesty is the best policy.

[988] And I feel like you can never get caught out.

[989] I mean, there's people that I know that are clean cut and don't do drugs, kids.

[990] And then get caught doing drugs.

[991] Yeah.

[992] So I think it's from the get -go.

[993] it's good to just to be honest.

[994] And I think if you're a nice person, you can't get caught out.

[995] I have, I mean, Claire, my publicist will tell you that the newspapers here, they will search for things on you.

[996] They will try and take you down and they will find stuff.

[997] So if you're just a nice person, they're not going to find shit because you don't have things to dig up.

[998] James Blunt said that to me. He said it once in an interview.

[999] And it was like this kind of faux shock from the press.

[1000] You'd probably do it with him.

[1001] They're probably at the part of doing it.

[1002] And he said it was very much a kind of like pop star does drugs.

[1003] And everyone was like, oh, no. We didn't see that coming.

[1004] Big shocker.

[1005] Let's talk about acting for one second.

[1006] Yeah.

[1007] Do you like it?

[1008] Do you know, I love the break from the norm, but I found, I did a TV show.

[1009] Game of Thrones.

[1010] No, no, no, no. It was a show called The Bastard Executioner, Kurt Suss.

[1011] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1012] And I loved the first.

[1013] day.

[1014] And then the second day, I was like, I felt so out of place because I wasn't an actor and the confidence.

[1015] I just, I didn't feel like a very confident actor.

[1016] And it actually turned, like, I watched that show now and it actually turned out really well.

[1017] But I feel I don't really have imposter syndrome too much with my own career because I know the path that it's, it's trod.

[1018] But I have real imposter syndrome with acting.

[1019] So I feel like dipping in and doing a cameo that I'm like asked to do rather than like that show I like went through the process of it.

[1020] Yeah, as a regular.

[1021] Yeah, and so I think dipping in, if I'm asked to do a came, I just did a cameo in this movie for Netflix where I actually play a wedding and then the wedding gets shut down.

[1022] The police drag me off stage and I start shouting, I'm fucking have you killed, you know what?

[1023] And I find that funny.

[1024] So, yeah, I do like acting in that respect.

[1025] I'm very aware that I am a very recognizable person who is well known for having a face for radio.

[1026] So I'm not like, I'm not, I'm not looking to be a heart I would love to do an animated movie.

[1027] I'd love to do a musical animated movie.

[1028] Well, my wife can make that happen.

[1029] That's her field is animated musicals.

[1030] Let's talk about Game of Thrones for one second.

[1031] Yeah.

[1032] Polarizing.

[1033] Well, I'm on the side that loved it.

[1034] So just know where I'm coming from.

[1035] But Game of Thrones at our house was a pod event way before there were pods.

[1036] We would Sunday night like four different families comes over.

[1037] We all, there's a whole thing.

[1038] We pause 80 times.

[1039] We wanted to last like six hours.

[1040] I mean, it's our...

[1041] We call it PR.

[1042] P .RQ.

[1043] Pause real quick.

[1044] Yeah, PRQ.

[1045] And then when someone says, of course, when you came on, fucking everyone's yelling.

[1046] PRQ!

[1047] I forgot that.

[1048] That's so great.

[1049] Is that?

[1050] Is that it?

[1051] PRQ!

[1052] Yeah.

[1053] But I just learned the backstory of it yesterday, reading about you.

[1054] That was a surprise for Aria.

[1055] Did you know that?

[1056] Oh, I didn't know that.

[1057] Yeah.

[1058] It was ruined.

[1059] That was ruined by Sophie, Sanzer.

[1060] Sanza.

[1061] Sophie said at ComicCon, he was like, oh, we've got Ed, Ed Shearron on the next season.

[1062] And I think, I think Macy was like, what?

[1063] Because she didn't know not to say But yeah Yeah basically it had come through I toured with Snow Patrol in 2012 And Gary the lead singer was mad It was season two was airing At the time He was mad on it And he had filmed a cameo for season three So I started watching it with him Instantly got obsessed Game of Thrones was like this show That I had the DVD box sets back home And none of my friends wants to watch it So I used to get a mate Around my house and be like We're watching get And I would watch season one with them for the day and then get them hooked and then I'd get another friend and I'd watch season one for the day I must have watched season one like spreading an STD yeah yeah but so I said to Gary back then I was like can you get me a cameo and he said yeah I'll speak I'll speak to the creator so I was in touch to the creators from like 2012 I think and then obviously they were like this doesn't make sense like why would we have but then it made sense just because it is comparable you would never acknowledge this but I'll acknowledge it for you I mean you sold 150 million only Michael Jackson really is in that world.

[1064] So just imagine you were watching Game of Thrones and they panned over and Mike was sitting there.

[1065] Yeah, I mean, for me, what I say to people all the time, because I know it was like a why, there was a big why.

[1066] Not for me. And I just say to people, what would you say?

[1067] Exactly.

[1068] Did you like sopranos?

[1069] You're too young to have liked sopranos?

[1070] I watched it in real time.

[1071] Oh, baby.

[1072] That was the other, that was, I've only had two shows in my life where it's like, friends came over on Sunday.

[1073] day.

[1074] We made Italian food.

[1075] We fucking watched Sopranos.

[1076] We paused a bunch.

[1077] But I always said, like, put me in the background as a waiter that's just dropping off a glass of water.

[1078] I just want to be, I want to be in the world I've been obsessed with.

[1079] I just want to enter the world.

[1080] And I can leave real quick.

[1081] So did you feel when you were on Game of Thrones, did that experience maybe live up?

[1082] Were you like, oh my God, I'm in the world.

[1083] Yeah.

[1084] Yeah.

[1085] And I feel like people's reaction to it sort of muddied my joy to it.

[1086] Sincerely, I fucking loved it.

[1087] Thank you.

[1088] And I was with you.

[1089] I'm like, God bless this motherfucker.

[1090] If they'd put me in that scene, I'm there in one second.

[1091] Yeah, yeah.

[1092] No, for sure, for sure.

[1093] But I was kind of immersed in the world anyway from just being friends with Richard Madden, who was the King of the North.

[1094] And so I'd known him from like 2012.

[1095] We met at a...

[1096] Do you know what?

[1097] I met Kit Harrington and Richard Madden, both in urinals.

[1098] Oh, wow.

[1099] Do you steal a peak?

[1100] No. I don't know because you're there and you're like, oh my God, this is kind of awkward.

[1101] I'm next to John Snow.

[1102] And not knowing that he's thinking, oh, my God, this is kind of awkward.

[1103] No, I met Richard back in 2012 at a festival.

[1104] He'd come to watch me headline, and we met just before I went on.

[1105] But I'd sort of been immersed in the world from knowing a lot of the actors from like 2012.

[1106] Right.

[1107] And so this is while you'll bail out of this conversation because I find that this is uncomfy for some English guys, but Kit Harrington.

[1108] What a physique.

[1109] I was watching those love -making scenes with Ian Calisi, and I'm like, those are some of the best buns I've ever seen, male or female.

[1110] So I've got to tell you, if I was at a urinal, I need now the final chapter.

[1111] My prediction is that his penis is so pretty.

[1112] Well, my rule usually is I don't go to urinals, there will be 20 urinals, and I'll stand it in any way, and someone will come and stand right next to me just to have a look show.

[1113] And so my rule is I usually don't, but this was a place where I think someone was in the bathroom doing drugs.

[1114] What a world.

[1115] So here's my question.

[1116] Wait, we never figured out why, how was, it was a surprise.

[1117] She was obsessed with you?

[1118] No, well, not obsessed.

[1119] Macy had come to shows.

[1120] So I'd met her.

[1121] She came in Dublin, I think because they were filming in Belfar.

[1122] So I'd met Macy probably when she was like 12, maybe 13.

[1123] She's always been awesome.

[1124] And I don't think they'd written the ending yet.

[1125] Or it was meant to be like her last season, but it wasn't.

[1126] And they said as a surprise for her, because it was her last season, they would get me on.

[1127] So she was meant to turn up.

[1128] on set and I was by the fire and she was meant to know her lines and everything get down and be like hang on.

[1129] Oh, how fun.

[1130] Yeah, but it was great.

[1131] It was great.

[1132] And I arrived the night before and Kit was obviously there filming with, there was a bunch of them and I took them out and Kit was doing his, mate, he was doing that scene.

[1133] He was doing that scene because I took him out and he was like, I've been on a strict diet and I was like, fuck you, man. You're having a burger and a beer and you're going to be happy about it.

[1134] And yeah, he was doing that.

[1135] seen the next day i think she told did she tell us that maybe they had a couple pops to get through it because they're such bros and they have to fuck passionately and their buddies i want to say they both had a glass of wine or something to kind of loosen up i don't i don't remember i'm probably starting a rumor he's married to rose who's i guess they're all like super close friend yeah so they moved i tell people all the time how great suffolk is and everyone's like yeah yeah yeah it's three three three hours he's moved there oh really yeah he took my advice went on right move and was like you know what, it's time.

[1136] You know who I'm most interested in?

[1137] Let me start.

[1138] You're the guess.

[1139] Who was your favorite character?

[1140] Are you?

[1141] Always.

[1142] Badass.

[1143] She's incredible.

[1144] I think they, as the show went on, because she's amazing in the books, but I think as the show went on, they realized what a fan favorite she was.

[1145] So they, once the books were ended, they gave her cooler and cooler shit to them.

[1146] Yeah.

[1147] That's a great, great pick.

[1148] Mine's the hound.

[1149] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1150] Because as a human being, I relate.

[1151] Like, I'm a piece of shit scumbag.

[1152] And then sometimes I got a lot of heart and I'll help you.

[1153] I love the lots of people named swords.

[1154] Lots of cunts.

[1155] Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare.

[1156] You can finally answer our long -standing question.

[1157] Well, you can weigh in.

[1158] You can weigh in.

[1159] No, I'm going to take his verdict as the verdict.

[1160] We are so curious, and maybe we're hearing it wrong, but when we hear your songs, it sounds to us like you have an American accent.

[1161] Oh, that's not the question I thought.

[1162] you were going to ask.

[1163] Oh, no, I'm not going to do that one.

[1164] I mean, I will, but I thought it might annoy you, so I decided to shelve that one.

[1165] Okay.

[1166] So we think, like, I think Mick Jagger sounds American when he sings, but then when he talks, he's clearly English, and your songs to me sound, what happens?

[1167] A, do you agree?

[1168] I know what you mean, because some people can't work out the accent.

[1169] It's like a newscaster in America.

[1170] They don't have any regional accent.

[1171] Yeah.

[1172] But it's not like, I'm in love with you boy.

[1173] No, but I don't talk like that.

[1174] No one does.

[1175] I don't really have a very bad English accent.

[1176] But I don't really have a regional accent here.

[1177] My accent is just kind of plain.

[1178] The region that I come from, man, is a really, really thick farming accent.

[1179] How's that sound?

[1180] And I say, you're all right, boy, how are you getting on?

[1181] Oh, wow.

[1182] How you got a light?

[1183] Everything's like a limerick.

[1184] Yeah.

[1185] It's like sing -songy.

[1186] Yeah, it's musical.

[1187] Yeah.

[1188] I think if I had an American out, it would be, I'm in love with the shape of you.

[1189] Instead of, I'm in love with the shape of you.

[1190] of you.

[1191] Oh, yeah, that is different.

[1192] English, yeah.

[1193] Fuck, so we were just wrong.

[1194] What's your other question that was going to annoy you?

[1195] But hold on, brown sugar, just like a young girl should.

[1196] That sounds American.

[1197] Yeah, I mean, no one's debating that the Rolling Stones might sound American sometimes.

[1198] No, you and I are debating.

[1199] I think there's a singing sound that is maybe separate from accents.

[1200] The trick is, this is what I, because some people can like really, really.

[1201] put on a voice.

[1202] I always say it's a happy birthday test.

[1203] How'd you sing happy birthday horribly?

[1204] And I wouldn't go happy birthday to you, I go happy birthday to you, you'd sing it and that's your actual singing word.

[1205] Please sing one more bar of it in American.

[1206] Happy birthday dear dad.

[1207] Happy birthday to you.

[1208] You're like a 14 year old girl when you're an American.

[1209] Oh yeah, no, no, because we grow up, all we watch is American Pie and Buffy the Vampire Slayer and it's like it's all teen, dramas and that's kind of part of your theory yeah yeah that was part of your theory because Josh our friend Josh he's Australian and he does such a good American I mean everyone who's not American can do a very good American accent apparently it's easy no one American can do a good English accent no one no thank you thank you so much thanks for noticing people always sound like they have speech impediments and it's like and it's like we don't about Robert don't eat Jimmy we're gonna talk exclusively about equals yeah but we also have to That's the other question because now Ed wants to know it.

[1210] I was 15.

[1211] I know for sure because I had my driver's learners permit and I got to drive for most of the drive to Vermont.

[1212] It was like a 10 -hour drive.

[1213] We went snowboarding at this place, Killington.

[1214] I met this beautiful girl from Manchester.

[1215] Manchester.

[1216] Jenny Hazleton.

[1217] I love you, Jenny.

[1218] She also was 15 and we had a fun day snowboarding.

[1219] We had a bunch of beers.

[1220] And then we ended up in a closet of a hotel room.

[1221] And as we were making out and things were progressing, I kept thinking like, well, at any point she's going to say.

[1222] let's probably wait or let's blah blah blah well that never came and then we were just plowing in a closet at 15 and ed that always stuck out to me for the following seven years is like curious like why was that because she was beautiful there's she had all the options and then I had an anthropology class in college where they were studying the world war two war babies do you know this phenomenon that a ton of american GIs got english women pregnant during world war two but proportionally and this is key because people like to comment.

[1223] I'm saying proportionally, because there were a lot of American females stationed here as well, they did not become pregnant from Englishmen at the same rate.

[1224] So that was the curious question.

[1225] And the anthropologists suggested that culturally in America, the woman has the brake pedal.

[1226] So it's kind of on the woman's shoulder to go like, let's wait, let's wait, let's wait.

[1227] And they said, and this is what, this is a fucking four year long argument that in England, the men are expected to have the break pedal.

[1228] Like as a gentleman, they're supposed to say, oh, let's wait.

[1229] Is that true or not?

[1230] And is that something that only existed in the 50s?

[1231] I think the two differences between our culture and your culture is religion.

[1232] And I think that is why it is, I don't really know about the other thing.

[1233] But I think in America, religion is so prevalent.

[1234] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1235] And sex and religion doesn't really mix.

[1236] They don't go hand in hand.

[1237] Whereas here, I'm not saying religion isn't prevalent here.

[1238] People are religious.

[1239] But it's not to the same degree.

[1240] it's not an identity here well no it is it is for some people but and you know i went to a church of england school and we sing hymns in school but like there's never a point where it's like i'm born with original sin and if i masturbate then i'm going to hell and there's never that point i think honestly the difference in cultures is religion oh that's a good i like that take a lot that really makes sense yeah have you had the experience hooking up with it was because you can imagine where if you're hooking up with an American, Claire is fucking rubbing her knees.

[1241] Would that be the worst thing that could get out about Ed is that he made love to an American and made her knight?

[1242] I dated an American from Arkansas.

[1243] Oh.

[1244] Well, then religion there.

[1245] I mean, that's a Bible Belt.

[1246] Yeah.

[1247] You could imagine a scenario where both people have the brake pedal and it just can't get done.

[1248] The religion element is really interesting because in the United States, it is a lot on the female to be pure.

[1249] to not be a slut.

[1250] Yeah, the pressure.

[1251] There's a lot of pressure on the...

[1252] Make sure you're in love before you have sex.

[1253] Yes.

[1254] So it makes you.

[1255] I think it makes sense that the woman in the United States has the break, or the girl has the brake pedal.

[1256] Separate from anything going on here.

[1257] Yeah, we don't know anything about here.

[1258] But there, yes, it's like every little girl's told like, he better love you.

[1259] It should be so special, blah, blah.

[1260] And it's like, you're putting on the shoulders of a 14 -year -old girl to evaluate whether a guy truly loves her or, I mean, this is insane.

[1261] My dad never said to me, make sure that girl loves you.

[1262] And you've got daughters as well.

[1263] So this is obviously on your mind with, yeah.

[1264] But I'm unconventional in this way.

[1265] I am so excited for my girls to get butterflies and to make out and do the whole thing.

[1266] It's my favorite part of ever being on planet Earth is that period where I was doing that.

[1267] But that's great.

[1268] This is what I always said.

[1269] As soon as I had a daughter, all of my mates were like, oh, you wait.

[1270] Better buy a gun.

[1271] Yeah.

[1272] And like, my thing is, if you're a shitty dad, then yes, she's going to be attracted to shitty men.

[1273] Yeah.

[1274] But like, I'm like, all I have to do is I just have to be there for her, be open, be honest, have conversation.

[1275] Never say don't do this, but just give her all the information.

[1276] That's me too.

[1277] And I think that's the thing with just young relationships.

[1278] I think my wife had this relationship with her mum where she just told her everything and didn't feel like she had to hide anything.

[1279] And not just, I'm not just talking like, hooking up and stuff like that.

[1280] But say you're at a party and you're blasted and you're throwing up and you're like, oh my God, I just want someone to come and get me and take me home.

[1281] because you can't ring your parents because they're going to have a go at you.

[1282] You have to have a relationship with your kids where, like, the worst -case scenario, you're going to get sort of a conversation that you probably don't want, but it's open enough that it's not going to be you're grounded for a month.

[1283] Although, I guess you can have the conversation and say, and by the way, you are grounded.

[1284] I want to tell you a rule I have.

[1285] So I used to like fist fighting a lot for myriad of reasons.

[1286] Strange hobby.

[1287] It is, it is, it is.

[1288] Not to bring you down, but I was very much.

[1289] victimized quite a bit as a child.

[1290] And so for me, the thing became, I'll die swinging going forward.

[1291] Also, they never, ever, ever fuck with you ever.

[1292] There was one kid at school.

[1293] He used to get my bag and empty the books every day.

[1294] Get my bag, empty books, get my bag, empty books.

[1295] And I said to my dad, what do I do?

[1296] And he's like much taller than me, much, much taller than me. And my dad was just like, punch him in the fucking jaw.

[1297] Yes, yes, yes.

[1298] Once, yes.

[1299] I punched him in the jaw and I got kicked the fuck in.

[1300] I was, I was like really, really, like, beaten.

[1301] But the next day, he didn't do it again.

[1302] He never did it again.

[1303] Never did it again.

[1304] Even if you get your ass beat, it's one ass beating versus 300.

[1305] And it's so sad, and I'm so grateful I don't have a son.

[1306] Because I don't want to pass that on.

[1307] I don't want to have to tell my kid fucking blast him in the nose.

[1308] It'll be over.

[1309] I'm so glad I don't have to do that.

[1310] Because I don't want to pass that on.

[1311] I just want to tell you, I had two, I'm going to take that back.

[1312] I had three rules.

[1313] I would never fight a guy who took his shirt off immediately.

[1314] because they're ready well no they've ruined so many shirts fighting they've learned to take it off okay that's a bad sign two don't fight a married dude because he's not fighting you he's fighting his wife and children his job and the stakes are fucking high you're a representation of everything he hates in life and number three and i swear to this do not fight a redhead don't don't fucking do it because I have seen in my childhood because everyone I grew up around look like you everyone's fucking English and Irish and blue collar and auto industry I saw little redheads get bullied by big guys and I saw the redheads engage in emotional gear that I've never seen like bawling while kicking ass and I was like that's some freaky shit so my my grandfather was a boxer and so my dad learned boxing as a kid and when I I was in, when I was really young, I'm talking like seven or eight and getting picked on.

[1315] My dad taught me boxing and taught me how to throw a punch well.

[1316] Yeah.

[1317] And I haven't had a fight since I was like 15 or whatever.

[1318] That was probably the last one, but it is true.

[1319] Like we, we as a people, redheads, go through quite a bit of abuse by the time we finish school.

[1320] And it's good to fucking be prepared.

[1321] I sort of wonder when having ginger hair joins the, oh, we can't joke.

[1322] about that thing.

[1323] Because everything has, everything seems to, and I was on Graham Norton, which is the big TV show here the other day.

[1324] And there was a segment where they were like, hey, look at this ginger cat.

[1325] It kind of looks like you.

[1326] And I was like, I was kind of sat there like, okay, like I know people find this funny, but also like, I'm wondering at what point does everyone go, okay, we can't rag on gingers anymore.

[1327] Yeah.

[1328] I don't even understand it.

[1329] Why?

[1330] Because you can.

[1331] It's the one thing you're still allowed to do.

[1332] It's what we say.

[1333] It's like, what accents am I allowed to do?

[1334] Well, virtually white people.

[1335] people because it's not a my business to do other ethnicities but more importantly I'm in the hegemonic group I'm in the white hegemonic group of the U .S and if I'm imitating someone that's marginalized and I'm perpetuating some stereotypes that exist solely because they're underrepresented I'm now part of the problem I can recognize that I didn't used to be able to recognize that I do every accent and I thought I was in fine standing for doing that but redheads are white that They ain't coming, my friend.

[1336] But they are the minority hair.

[1337] You know what would piss me off about that more than anything is my bar of comedy.

[1338] I'd be like, really, man, that's your fucking joke?

[1339] I look like a cat.

[1340] There's a whole BuzzFeed article of like people that thought they met Ed Shearer and it is literally just fat ginger kids.

[1341] What?

[1342] And I'm like, you know, I exercise.

[1343] I eat well.

[1344] I'm like, at least.

[1345] That's so weird.

[1346] I got to tell you the thing.

[1347] I think I relate most to you.

[1348] I think I really, I think you and I are brothers on this, is my most hated moments of my life are photo shoots.

[1349] Oh, mate.

[1350] I don't trust anyone that does enjoy them, though.

[1351] I don't trust anyone that likes red carpets.

[1352] I don't trust anyone that likes photoshoots.

[1353] Like, when you see someone that is there and is like, I love this.

[1354] It's my most hated thing I do.

[1355] And I warn the photographer right away, I go, look, man, you're seeing me in my worst day.

[1356] I'm insecure.

[1357] I fucking hate how I look.

[1358] There's no picture you're going to take on me. And it doesn't mean I don't like you.

[1359] No, yeah.

[1360] I just, I'm at my most insecure today.

[1361] And when I'm at my most insecure, I get really protective of myself.

[1362] And I'm like, that's a not, you know, like, I've learned to warn people, like, you're going to see the shittiest side of me because I'm so insecure.

[1363] Dude, I didn't, I wasn't in my first 10 music videos.

[1364] I found ways for me not to be in them.

[1365] I hired fucking Rupert Grint from Harry Potter to play, to play, to play me in a music video because I didn't want to be in a music video.

[1366] Did he drive his ice cream truck?

[1367] No, but I think, I think he did have it at the time.

[1368] But I tried for so long.

[1369] long to be, because I hate the way I look and I don't want to see it.

[1370] So I do photo shoots now and I'm just like, I don't care.

[1371] Like you pick the photos.

[1372] I don't want to see them.

[1373] Yeah, you'll basically, you say you can't use any of these photos.

[1374] So yeah, exactly, exactly.

[1375] So, but here's what I was going to say.

[1376] So I think this is where the parallel is.

[1377] What's so crazy is if I can talk, like you turn a camera on me, I'm not insecure.

[1378] And you are crazy confident on stage.

[1379] Oh, dude.

[1380] Yeah, the most, the most.

[1381] But honestly, even on stage, you take the guitar away from me. I'm like, oh, what do you?

[1382] Like, like, I couldn't do it.

[1383] I broke both my arms and then I had to do a TV show.

[1384] Oh, how did you bring both your arms?

[1385] Cycling.

[1386] Bicycling, went over the handlebars?

[1387] Yeah.

[1388] And you broke, what?

[1389] Whilst on tour, I had to cancel like 20 shows.

[1390] Oh, my God.

[1391] Do you know what's weird about it?

[1392] Is, so the biggest tour that my tour sort of did better than, that sounds so weird.

[1393] My tour ended up being the biggest tour.

[1394] The biggest tour before then.

[1395] Was you two?

[1396] And he canceled 20 shows because he broke both of his arms in a bicycle accident.

[1397] Bonham.

[1398] That's simulation -y.

[1399] By the way, he could have performed with, he doesn't play guitar.

[1400] Like if at the edge broke his arms.

[1401] Yeah, but he doesn't want to be there in big casts.

[1402] Yeah.

[1403] We did a show and I was, what, 18 hours out of foot surgery?

[1404] Oh, yeah.

[1405] And I loved it because I was kind of like, well, they're going to lower their expectations of the show's semi -good and they know I'm on crutches and 14 hours of surgery.

[1406] They're going to be like, I barely put on a good show.

[1407] Yeah, because you do the show's life, right?

[1408] Uh -huh.

[1409] You know, occasionally.

[1410] But you can't do it with two broken arms because you're doing all kinds of stuff.

[1411] Well, no, but this is my point.

[1412] I was playing a. playing a TV show.

[1413] It was like an award show in France, and I had to sing perfect.

[1414] And usually I play it on acoustic guitar, but I had a band.

[1415] And I sort of, like Michael Boubley.

[1416] I was in a suit and I had the mic, but I felt so naked on stage, not to have anything to hide behind.

[1417] Yeah.

[1418] I watched some of the seasons of American Idol.

[1419] And that would always be a thing for like people who play guitar.

[1420] They would be trying to urge them to try it without the guitar.

[1421] And I was just like, I don't get it.

[1422] I know why.

[1423] I totally agree.

[1424] If someone has a thing, then.

[1425] Yes.

[1426] Yeah, I never get that.

[1427] I just, I was a mentor on the voice recently.

[1428] And there was this amazing country singer.

[1429] And she was singing, obviously singing covers.

[1430] And I was like, why don't you sing your own songs on this?

[1431] Because you obviously have your own songs.

[1432] And she was like, oh, they won't let me do that.

[1433] And I'm like, but called the voice.

[1434] It's not called the we sing covers.

[1435] It's been a voice.

[1436] If you have a voice, have it be your tunes.

[1437] Yeah.

[1438] Yeah.

[1439] I don't know.

[1440] I think there's like a licensing thing.

[1441] Oh, sure.

[1442] Wait, first of all, you guys are both so handsome.

[1443] Oh, thank you.

[1444] I have to make that close.

[1445] That's because you guys are, I get it, but it's so silly.

[1446] Are you insecure?

[1447] The mo. Exactly.

[1448] Like, this is the thing, my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world and she is in school, but she needs, we all need people who say that.

[1449] Yeah.

[1450] I think you look wonderful today.

[1451] But it's also just the truth.

[1452] It's the truth to you.

[1453] And would you like to...

[1454] To know it?

[1455] Yeah.

[1456] Would you like to walk in a room and be like, I am so hot?

[1457] No. No. It's good to, again, self -awareness.

[1458] It's good to just be self -awareness.

[1459] way and even i've had this experience i don't know if you guys have ever had this and this will sound really cruel but it is the truth i've had friends that when i met them i was like oh wow this awkward looking dude come to think they're so fucking attractive and they get all kinds of women because they're wonderful people and they're confident and all these things and i'll introduce them to someone who's never met them and it clicks me back for half a second where i go oh they're seeing him for the first time and they don't know how charming and everything and I just get aware of it.

[1460] I'm like, oh, it's so weird.

[1461] The whole thing is so weird, because I don't see that now.

[1462] I just see it.

[1463] But isn't it bad that you can look at someone and be like, you suddenly feel a certain type of way about them just because of the way they look?

[1464] Because we all do it.

[1465] We all do it.

[1466] And then you meet them and you're like, oh, my God, I'm such a dick.

[1467] Why do I think that?

[1468] Well, sadly, you know, we're fighting against a lot of biology, which is we're going to procreate with someone.

[1469] We want our kids to succeed in whatever environment we're in.

[1470] So it's a hurdle we have to just step across.

[1471] But it is always going to be there.

[1472] It's how we're watching.

[1473] That's what I used to hate.

[1474] I was only on a dating app once for like 24 hours, Hinge.

[1475] It was a long time ago.

[1476] So now they've changed it.

[1477] But when I was on it, you only saw the picture.

[1478] You saw the school they went to and their age.

[1479] And that was it.

[1480] And I was on it.

[1481] And I was like, I'm making decisions based on how high of education they have their face.

[1482] I'm like, this is disgusting.

[1483] Like, I couldn't do it.

[1484] I had to get up.

[1485] I was like, this is not why I like anyone.

[1486] So, yeah, I just don't know.

[1487] It is funny because I do you think you're both beautiful as fuck.

[1488] And I think, yeah.

[1489] I'm available.

[1490] I've got an arrangement with my wife.

[1491] Okay.

[1492] I want to talk about equals now.

[1493] First of all, I guess I'm curious and probably...

[1494] We don't have to, by the way.

[1495] I'm not on this to promote the album.

[1496] Oh, okay.

[1497] Yeah, but we want to talk about it.

[1498] I have a couple questions.

[1499] One is just, I know everyone knows this, and I just simply don't choosing to use math symbols, word that idea come from I fucking love it I'm a big fan of Coldplay I really fucking love Coldplay and I love how Coldplay on every album Are you cold play fans?

[1500] What's your favorite Coldplay song?

[1501] I wanted to interrupt you to ask Fix you by far Fix You can still make me cry Yes What about yellow?

[1502] Again great But Fix You is like To drum up emotion Every time you listen to a song It's so fucking else But anyway So you guys are Coldplay fans I say X and Y to you you see the symbols you see the cover you know what the tour looked like you know what they were dressed I say Viva Lveda you know the cover you know what the so for me I very very young I was like 18 or 19 and I just decided I was like right I'm going to do five math symbols as my albums one's going to be orange one's going to be green one's going to be blue one's going to be red one's going to be yellow and you're going to just see a poster and the poster is just going to have an equal sign on it and you'll know what it is you know I even need to see my name my name has never been on the front cover of my CD Oh really?

[1503] Never never oh I love that But everyone knows that that's my CDs, but you'll see a green, you won't even see the X. You'll see a green CD and you go, that's it.

[1504] So you see a blue CD and you go, that's, that's heads.

[1505] And I really, really wanted to, it's not so much a branding thing, but just a feel of, a, oh yeah, a feel of an album.

[1506] I say divide to you and you see blue and the tour and the splash and the thing.

[1507] And now I'm doing this tour, which is all of them.

[1508] And you look at those symbols and you go, oh, he's going to play all those songs.

[1509] You just see the symbols and you go, and it's those songs, rather than being like, the greatest hit store.

[1510] Right.

[1511] And also, it's something, the first one, I'd released five EPs, and my plan was to release five EPs and become successful, because no label wanted to sign me. So I had all these songs that I was saving for an album, and I thought, fuck out, I'm just going to do it.

[1512] So I made a band EP, electronic EP, a acoustic EP that was a collaboration with a singer, a live EP, and then a kind of grime rap EP, which was a collaborations project.

[1513] And then by the end of that, I pretty much made it as far as I wanted to make it.

[1514] I signed a record deal.

[1515] And then Plus was the addition to all of that.

[1516] So it was the add -on.

[1517] Multiply took what Plus did and made it bigger.

[1518] Divide was a double album originally, but now they're all muddled up.

[1519] But it was R &B and acoustic.

[1520] And then there was going to be a stripped back acoustic album, which was meant to be the next one, but this is now the next one.

[1521] And then Equals was going to be the end of the equation with every aspect of all the albums in it.

[1522] And I was like, that's my next 10 years planned out.

[1523] And it's now been 10 years.

[1524] And in between, I was going to do a number six collaborations project.

[1525] In between the next one, I'll probably do number seven.

[1526] Like, I planned it out.

[1527] But you're not making a Tarantino declaration.

[1528] No, well, I'm only going to make 10 movies.

[1529] No, I'm not going to make 10 records, but I'm going to make 10 symbol records.

[1530] Okay, okay.

[1531] But not the next five won't be maths.

[1532] Okay.

[1533] So, and also Tarantino wouldn't class Grindhouse as one of his 10.

[1534] Like, he's still allowed, he's still allowed to go off and do offshoots.

[1535] And maybe if he did Star Trek, it wouldn't count as one of his 10.

[1536] So he's going to make 10 official Tarantino movies.

[1537] And I'm going to make 10.

[1538] official albums.

[1539] You clearly like Tarantino.

[1540] I love Tarantino.

[1541] I met him at an award show and it was one of those ones where I didn't want that to be how I met.

[1542] Because I always want to meet people when they want to meet me and I was one of those ones where I was kind of brought up to him and introduced and like Shook a hand and I was like, this isn't how I want to do it.

[1543] I remember I made my second album with Rick Rubin who you guys should definitely introduce.

[1544] I want to.

[1545] He was playing with Eminem and he took me to S &L and he was like, you want to meet Marshall?

[1546] And I was like, no, I don't.

[1547] And he was like, cool.

[1548] But the reason I didn't want to meet him was because I don't want to be like, hey, this is Ed Sheeran.

[1549] By the way, he sings.

[1550] This is a fan.

[1551] Yeah, you'd know.

[1552] He sings this song and blah, blah, blah.

[1553] I was like, when I meet Eminem, I want him to be like, Ed, can we do a song together?

[1554] And that was my Tarantino thing.

[1555] Like, I didn't want to be brought up and be presented.

[1556] I have the exact same thing with Bill Murray.

[1557] I've been next to him, like, probably six times.

[1558] And I'd love him too much to not.

[1559] I only want one version of it.

[1560] Yeah.

[1561] I don't want the I'm a fan of you version.

[1562] I want the let's talk.

[1563] I'm interested in you version.

[1564] Yeah.

[1565] And maybe that's been a mistake.

[1566] No, no, it's not because your memories will not be muddied.

[1567] You can go through the whole of life knowing that you made the right decision.

[1568] Or you can have a really awkward selfie with Bill Murray and be like, he kind of thought I sucked.

[1569] Yeah, he couldn't get out of that fast enough.

[1570] Now, how is your new tour structured different than the last so that you don't experience what you did last time?

[1571] I'm bringing my family with me No, no, no, I'm doing way more shows Oh wow Oh boy Way more you did 260 the last Yeah, I'm going to do more Can we come?

[1572] Are you going to come to L .A.?

[1573] Yep, yep, we're coming to L .A. The way I view it is my daughter is one Yeah And when she starts school I'm going to want to be settled And I'm not going to want to go on a five -year world tour So now is the time to do it So I'm going to go until she turns about five or six and then stop.

[1574] So I'm basically going to get all of my touring in.

[1575] And then I think I'll tour school holidays and stuff like that.

[1576] But I'm going to get it all in.

[1577] I want to play places I haven't been as well.

[1578] Like I've never really, I played China, but I've never properly toured China.

[1579] I want to go there for like six weeks and actually just be in China.

[1580] Yeah.

[1581] That's a great plan.

[1582] And we did the same thing when our little babies, we still took movies out of town and just traveled and it was great.

[1583] There's pictures of them all over the place.

[1584] It was really wonderful.

[1585] but I do want to potentially warn you for something in your future, which is I brought the 8 -year -old, my daughter, Lincoln, to one of our shows.

[1586] Oh.

[1587] Thinking like somehow she would like see me and my L &N, she'd have some kind of like affection for what I do.

[1588] And what did she, she watched for maybe 12 seconds and then she went in the green room and, yeah, wanted to draw pictures or something.

[1589] I was like, but would you with your parents?

[1590] No. I remember my dad, my dad, he's an art historian.

[1591] So he used to do lectures on, like, art, but like old art. And I remember the same thing.

[1592] Now, I'm fascinated.

[1593] And I want to sit with him for hours.

[1594] I want him to tell me about the Napoleonic era and all these art. He took me to Louvre the other day.

[1595] And we, but at the time, I remember just being like, I don't want to fucking listen to this.

[1596] Like, what, yeah.

[1597] Have you bought him a crazy painting that he would, please say, yes.

[1598] Please tell me he's got a fucking Picasso or something.

[1599] I tell you what.

[1600] Does he have a scream in his house?

[1601] I've been to a house that did have one.

[1602] Yes, yes.

[1603] Was it in New York?

[1604] Yeah.

[1605] So can I just tell you one second funny story about that?

[1606] I didn't go there, but my mentor is a 72 -year -old lawyer.

[1607] I love this dude.

[1608] We ride motorcycles together.

[1609] I worship him.

[1610] He's got two daughters.

[1611] They're grown.

[1612] They turned out perfect.

[1613] I want to be him.

[1614] I'm driving in the car with his two daughters in the back seat.

[1615] They're like 22 and 24.

[1616] And I say, who's dating who?

[1617] Oh, she's the younger one's got a new boyfriend.

[1618] I go, oh, where does he live?

[1619] Oh, he lives in Manhattan.

[1620] Oh, what does his family do?

[1621] I don't know.

[1622] They're investors.

[1623] or something.

[1624] And then the oldest sister goes, they have the scream in their house.

[1625] Oh, my God.

[1626] Not only that, but they own all of one street and they've knocked the middle of the house out so they can have natural light in every room.

[1627] I went there, I went there, and I played this music festival, and I played with this artist, and they said, they make me look poor.

[1628] And I was like, fucking hell, what's this house going to?

[1629] And I walked in, and the first thing I saw was a huge Francis Bay.

[1630] And I was like, that's not fake.

[1631] And then there was these, oh, man, he had a Picasso floor.

[1632] It was like an art gallery.

[1633] But the cool thing about it is he lends all the stuff out to galleries.

[1634] So he would lend out the screen.

[1635] Even Bill Gates, I think he owns the coolest thing someone could, especially for him to have bought, which is he bought Leonardo da Vinci's journals.

[1636] And, you know, he invented an eyepiece that he would write it.

[1637] It's written upside down and backwards.

[1638] And then you need the eyepiece to read it.

[1639] And it's on tour like, you know, nine months of the year.

[1640] it's back at his house and he geeks out over it and then it goes on tour.

[1641] Have you interviewed Ryan Tedder before?

[1642] No. One Republic.

[1643] He collects old important historical artifacts like letters from George Washington and stuff like that.

[1644] Yeah, he's got some really, I hope he won't mind me saying.

[1645] But I think he again lends them out to museums.

[1646] But yeah, on art, I remember there was one time, this was before like stuff was like published in the papers about who weren't what.

[1647] And I remember my dad sending me this Rembrandt that was like 100.

[1648] of millions and him being like, I don't know if he was saying, he basically said this is a good investment.

[1649] I don't know if he was saying to me that you should buy it.

[1650] But I remember thinking, I don't know if you know what musicians earn, but it's not quite there yet.

[1651] Oh my God, I got to tell you the fucking craziest experience I had.

[1652] We were at my family's house in Oregon for Christmas.

[1653] And I don't know how this came up.

[1654] Somehow someone brought up Celebritynetworth .com, which I didn't even know was a thing.

[1655] Like, oh, yeah, it's a thing.

[1656] You can go look and blah, blah, blah.

[1657] I'm sitting there, sitting there, and then I'm thinking, well, they must have looked me up, right?

[1658] And I said, did you look me up?

[1659] And they said, yeah.

[1660] And I said, how much do I have?

[1661] And they said this number that was at the time, like eight times, 10 times what I had.

[1662] And I said, uh -huh, did you look Kristen up?

[1663] Yeah.

[1664] What does she have?

[1665] Uh -huh.

[1666] And I said, if I were you guys and you thought we had that much money and we weren't just fucking showering it.

[1667] Like, I would be resentful.

[1668] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1669] So it's kind of like a little dangerous.

[1670] I mean, that's one of my most Google things.

[1671] If you type in my name, you know, the suggested thing.

[1672] Yeah.

[1673] That's like, I think that's like the top thing that people ask.

[1674] Mine is, if you're at Is Dax, Shepard, it'll auto fill a gay.

[1675] Which apparently happens to nearly everyone.

[1676] That's funny.

[1677] Ed, you're fucking radical.

[1678] I'm so grateful that you sat down with us.

[1679] Thank you so much for having more fun.

[1680] Yeah, this is a ton of fun.

[1681] I adore you.

[1682] Thank you so much, man. And last thing I got to say.

[1683] I just because I want people to know the real you.

[1684] I ask Sean, dude, I hate doing this.

[1685] Could you just ask him because I'm going to be in London?

[1686] He's like, no problem.

[1687] Within 10 minutes, I get an email from you.

[1688] You're fucking cordial.

[1689] Would you like to have lunch?

[1690] You're a goddamn gentleman.

[1691] You're a nice person behind the scenes, y 'all.

[1692] All right.

[1693] Thank you.

[1694] Nice for a man. I appreciate that.

[1695] Yeah.

[1696] And now my favorite part of the show, the fact check with my soulmate Monica Padman.

[1697] Only ABR?

[1698] We're ruined.

[1699] Rolling, rolling, rolling.

[1700] This was such a fun episode.

[1701] It was more than an episode.

[1702] It became a life event.

[1703] Really did.

[1704] Getting to go to his restaurant.

[1705] His pub.

[1706] Birdie and...

[1707] Birdie blossoms.

[1708] Birdie blossoms.

[1709] Mm -hmm.

[1710] And getting to eat that insane meal.

[1711] Mm -mm -mm -mm.

[1712] And Danny came by and Blake.

[1713] And Blake came by, so we all had lunch together, the five of us.

[1714] Introduced those guys so they could geek out on watches.

[1715] I wrote that down.

[1716] Watches.

[1717] Okay, they talked about a watch for like 30 minutes straight.

[1718] And it sounded so limited edition, so exciting.

[1719] And I really wanted it.

[1720] You were interested.

[1721] Not because you like watches, but because of the limited edition of it.

[1722] That's right.

[1723] That's right.

[1724] What kind is it again?

[1725] A petite something.

[1726] Petit -a -a -a -a -tie -to -a.

[1727] It was a great experience for me because generally I'm the person in that talk.

[1728] Like, I'm the one talking about a certain car for 45 minutes, right?

[1729] Sure, sure.

[1730] And so to get to observe other people that geeked out about something mechanical was really funny.

[1731] And just when you thought you had heard about the most exclusive ones, that turns out, well, then there's also one that's got this engraving on it.

[1732] Tiffany somehow connected.

[1733] Yeah, I want them all.

[1734] Somehow they got in on it.

[1735] I want them.

[1736] I want them all.

[1737] Speaking of Danny, I'm wearing one of his new sweat.

[1738] sweatshirts.

[1739] And he has just great merch.

[1740] I'm just going to send people to Danny Ricardo's site.

[1741] And the one you're wearing is a, I don't know if you've put this together, but it's a NASCAR throwback.

[1742] So, of course, Daniel Ricardo picked the number three because he loved Dale Earnhardt, the intimidator.

[1743] Right.

[1744] And so, and at the Austin race, he got to drive one of Dale's NASCAR's on the track.

[1745] And he had his helmet done up as Dale Earnhardt's helmet.

[1746] And so now he's got sweatshirts that are like kind of a throwback.

[1747] And the back says, lick the stamp.

[1748] And that's like his catchphrase.

[1749] Dale Earnhardt's.

[1750] No, Danny's.

[1751] It is?

[1752] Yeah.

[1753] Oh.

[1754] It's his like new catchphrase.

[1755] Oh, new catchphrase.

[1756] And we asked, when we were on the river before the near death experience.

[1757] Right.

[1758] We asked him what it meant.

[1759] And I guess this is, we're old.

[1760] You know, I'm older than Danny too.

[1761] So we're really old, me and you.

[1762] Hold on there.

[1763] You're two years older than Danny?

[1764] Yeah, really old.

[1765] Okay.

[1766] No, two.

[1767] He's 89.

[1768] You're 87.

[1769] Okay.

[1770] All right.

[1771] Everyone calm down.

[1772] There is a phrase, send it.

[1773] Oh, right.

[1774] Yes, yes.

[1775] Send it means go big.

[1776] Jump high, jump far.

[1777] Yeah.

[1778] Full send.

[1779] Send it.

[1780] Never heard it.

[1781] You've obviously heard it.

[1782] Oh, yeah.

[1783] I've been sending it for a while.

[1784] You could find some pictures of me jumping razers in the dunes from three years ago where I either write hashtag full send or have.

[1785] Hashtag send it.

[1786] Okay, cool.

[1787] Well, I didn't know about it.

[1788] And he's added, lick the stamp.

[1789] Send it.

[1790] That's a really good idea.

[1791] So it's just before send it.

[1792] Like the stamp.

[1793] I love it.

[1794] I just want to give a shout out to the guy who really made it hugely popular.

[1795] There's this amazing Canadian dude with a fucking really long, short, long.

[1796] Oh, okay.

[1797] What else people call that?

[1798] Also known as a mullet.

[1799] A mullet.

[1800] Huge mullet.

[1801] This old shitty snowmobile, like a fucking 79 Yamaha 400.

[1802] a piece of crap and he's in the deep snow and only denim he'll only wear jean jackets with big bright green oakly glasses and he his whole thing was you know i'm gonna send it i'm gonna send it and he'd get on this piece of shit snowmobile and jump it way too far it's so dangerous oh wow yeah and he made it really really popular okay okay that's good giving him credit yeah yeah he deserves he i think he's had a lot of injuries to make that expression popular um so yeah ed's wife's name is cherry.

[1803] Blossom.

[1804] Cherry.

[1805] And so that's why it's Bertie Blossoms because cherry blossoms and Bertie is his manager's wife's name.

[1806] And you have a cherry blossom tattoo so it's all a ding, ding, ding.

[1807] Oh my gosh, oh my gosh.

[1808] No. And then tomorrow I go in for my first.

[1809] Oh, you do?

[1810] Yeah, tomorrow I'm back in the chair.

[1811] Saddle?

[1812] Yeah, I haven't gotten one in over a decade, I think.

[1813] And which one are you getting tomorrow?

[1814] I think we're going to start on the crow Either the crow or the Delta 88 and the Lincoln symbol But all three of those things are happening soon So I'm not sure where he will want to start Oh my goodness, what time I'm really excited too Two I go in Where is it?

[1815] On sunset, Shamrock You know it, it's in West Hollywood Is the crow going to be black?

[1816] It's going to be blue Which would really make it a raven But raven crow, same deal Okay.

[1817] Knock, knock, knocking on my chamber door.

[1818] Never more.

[1819] Never more.

[1820] Knock, knock, knock.

[1821] Wow.

[1822] That's exciting.

[1823] It is exciting.

[1824] It was so funny because Lincoln was saying, so initially when I told Lincoln I was going to get some more tattoos, she did not like it.

[1825] She started crying.

[1826] Oh.

[1827] I get it like you love your parent.

[1828] You don't want them to change.

[1829] So that was a whole process.

[1830] And then she came around.

[1831] She's like, you know what, I want you to.

[1832] That's, you know, if you want to do that, blah, blah, blah.

[1833] So she was further telling me that she's supportive now of the thing.

[1834] And she said, but, Dad, you can't get a sleeve.

[1835] You're too old.

[1836] Oh, well.

[1837] And I said, well, hon, I don't know if I'm too old to have a sleeve.

[1838] Uh -huh.

[1839] And the end goal is a sleeve.

[1840] And she said, you're just too old.

[1841] You'll look, it'll be embarrassing.

[1842] You're trying to be so cool.

[1843] Wow.

[1844] That's pretty insightful.

[1845] That could be the truth.

[1846] Yeah.

[1847] I don't disagree with her.

[1848] But I also think you should do it if you want to do it.

[1849] Well, we'll take it as they come.

[1850] We'll decide if it's too much.

[1851] Slow and steady.

[1852] Slow and steady.

[1853] We'll win the race.

[1854] So we talk about Guinness in the episode because he has Guinness on tap at his house at his Neverland.

[1855] He doesn't have Guinness.

[1856] Oh, he does.

[1857] He has four.

[1858] One of them is Guinness, neck oil, one of his friend's dad.

[1859] Yeah.

[1860] And then another one, I forget.

[1861] And one was at a bar we went into, though, and you'd regretted not trying that.

[1862] Neck oil, yeah.

[1863] Danny said, you got to try it.

[1864] But then I just got wine.

[1865] But then, it was so kind of you.

[1866] I really, of course, I wanted to have a pint in England is what it really was.

[1867] And I just kept saying to you, I don't want you to miss having a pint while you're here.

[1868] You really wanted me. I really wanted you too.

[1869] Yeah.

[1870] And we stopped at a place.

[1871] Yep.

[1872] And you got yourself a pint at Guinness.

[1873] Yeah.

[1874] And it was so generous of you to even participate in this.

[1875] Took a couple sips, and I was really proud of it.

[1876] I had to give it to you.

[1877] Yeah.

[1878] You didn't want it.

[1879] No. I didn't.

[1880] It's a bit heavy for me. Yeah, it's a heavy loggar.

[1881] And then I was explaining to you that they prescribed it when you're in the hospital back in the day because of it's high iron content and nutritious value.

[1882] And I was, my flies were around.

[1883] They were in the - They were swarming.

[1884] So.

[1885] You needed some iron share.

[1886] It was good for me. Probably help things out.

[1887] Oh, okay.

[1888] So we also talk about hot ones.

[1889] First of all, love hot ones so much.

[1890] And you said you're legendary on it, which you are.

[1891] But I wanted to read the best hot ones guess ever.

[1892] There's a couple different, like, you know, sites that have ranked.

[1893] But here's one of them.

[1894] Okay.

[1895] Paul Rudd, number one.

[1896] I've seen that one.

[1897] Shia Labuth.

[1898] Uh -huh.

[1899] Gordon Ramsey.

[1900] Okay.

[1901] Terry Cruz.

[1902] Kristen Bell.

[1903] Oh, boy.

[1904] Aubrey Plaza.

[1905] Stone Cold Steve Austin.

[1906] Nick Offerman.

[1907] Charlize.

[1908] They're on.

[1909] Scarlett Johansson.

[1910] Hallie Berry.

[1911] Jordan Peel.

[1912] Neil deGrasse Tyson.

[1913] Man, he gets people.

[1914] Steve O. Ken Jong.

[1915] Dak Shepard.

[1916] Did you read this list just to make me feel terrible?

[1917] You're on it.

[1918] I'm like 25th.

[1919] I'm the only person to ask for an extra wing with extra hawk sauce.

[1920] Okay, first of all...

[1921] Well, I wonder, eat 11 while I was there.

[1922] First of all, I just looked this up right now.

[1923] So I didn't know.

[1924] Okay, this wasn't a setup too.

[1925] No, why do you think that?

[1926] I would never do that.

[1927] Also, you should be proud you're on this list.

[1928] I think it's just a list of now everyone that's ever been on it.

[1929] No, they've interviewed like 300 people.

[1930] Oh, okay.

[1931] All right, okay.

[1932] My God, you're 16.

[1933] Just...

[1934] Idris Elba, Kegan Michael Key, Alton Brown, Russell Crow.

[1935] Oh, there are a lot of people on here.

[1936] Oh, 25.

[1937] Okay.

[1938] Russell Crow.

[1939] Bert Kreischer, Aricandre, Post Malone, Chili Klaus.

[1940] Oh, Chili Klaus is famous.

[1941] Who's Chili Klaus?

[1942] He's like a German pepper.

[1943] And when he eats it, he goes, like, he's crazy.

[1944] He's obsessed with Hops.

[1945] peppers and he does this thing where he eats the California Reaper and he goes he loses his all control of his body physiologically he's incredible oh my god okay and then Shaquille O 'Neal oh okay well I feel no I feel good okay there's actually more but I'm gonna stop there okay but anyway yeah you're up there okay okay that's good I feel better that's only one site too like other people let me look look on my site I think I have myself a little higher a little more legendary status.

[1946] I guess my claim didn't pan out.

[1947] I didn't check out my claim.

[1948] But again, I did ask for an 11th wing.

[1949] If you're on this site, you're a big deal.

[1950] You're a big name in the hot food game.

[1951] This other one by BuzzFeed.

[1952] Uh -huh.

[1953] This is a bad experiment.

[1954] Okay, hold on.

[1955] Just hold on.

[1956] Okay.

[1957] Hold on, I'm looking at best miniature mouse in the world.

[1958] Hey, I just want to...

[1959] Yeah, I know, I know.

[1960] We got to know the truth.

[1961] No, that's not why.

[1962] I want to make you feel better.

[1963] It's not going well.

[1964] But I'm now going to know I'm not on this list.

[1965] What I'll know is if you don't read any of the names, I'm not on that list.

[1966] A lot of scrolling.

[1967] You're on it.

[1968] Honorable mention.

[1969] Whatever.

[1970] They haven't watched.

[1971] them all.

[1972] Anyway, I love your episode and you do ask for another wing and it's impressive.

[1973] And I had no reaction whatsoever.

[1974] I know.

[1975] Which I then was getting self -conscious about.

[1976] Like I thought, man, maybe I should literally act like I'm having one because it's not a fun show.

[1977] What makes the show fun is people losing their marbles and they can't talk.

[1978] Yeah, but it's also fun when people can handle it well.

[1979] I guess, but I just remember thinking this, I'm not giving this guy the show he makes.

[1980] Like I got a little codependent.

[1981] My boyfriend isn't on the list either.

[1982] But he just was on, right?

[1983] Yeah.

[1984] That list might predate his appearance.

[1985] I'm sure he's number one now.

[1986] He didn't.

[1987] He didn't like it.

[1988] He didn't.

[1989] I was.

[1990] At what number?

[1991] Right out of the gates?

[1992] No. Six or seven.

[1993] It's a weird one and this comes up.

[1994] I think it was even in Ed's because I watched Eds before the interview.

[1995] And I think I agree.

[1996] Like number six or something's the worst.

[1997] For some reason, even though it's lower on the Scoville, it's, To me, when I got to six, I was like, oh, I might be in trouble if there's four more.

[1998] And then it got a little better.

[1999] It plateaued and then went down if anything.

[2000] Well, there's different kinds.

[2001] Like, you know, some hit you in the back of the throat.

[2002] Sure.

[2003] They all hit you in the ass eventually.

[2004] Well, sure.

[2005] They punch you right in the seat.

[2006] I don't think I'd do well.

[2007] I don't either.

[2008] Yeah.

[2009] Yeah.

[2010] But what is funny is my performance on that show and Kristen's.

[2011] Kristen as well went all the way and didn't care.

[2012] Mm -hmm.

[2013] We were overly confident when we ate that weird piece of chocolate for a charity.

[2014] Yeah.

[2015] And we got caught with our pants down.

[2016] There was people were throwing up, we're guzzling milk.

[2017] It was just torturous.

[2018] And I was like, oh, I'm not nearly as good at this as I thought.

[2019] Yeah, but that one seemed extreme.

[2020] It was really extreme.

[2021] Carolina Reber in a chocolate.

[2022] Yuck.

[2023] As I learned on the rapids, follow my gut.

[2024] Don't be peer pressured.

[2025] But could we?

[2026] But, so you're right.

[2027] You're right.

[2028] You're right.

[2029] You're right.

[2030] But your gut wouldn't have led you to mushrooms, and that's one where you actually ultimately feel like you're grateful.

[2031] You tried it.

[2032] Yeah, that's true.

[2033] There's been some examples of you being out of your comfort zone and then being happy you were.

[2034] Definitely.

[2035] But my gut with mushrooms when I ended up doing them was it's time to try it.

[2036] Mm -hmm.

[2037] Yeah.

[2038] It wasn't, I really don't want to.

[2039] But I'm going to, wasn't that.

[2040] Okay.

[2041] You're okay?

[2042] You good?

[2043] You're all right?

[2044] Okay, so he talks about failures and how he's only learned from failures, not successes, and you said that's a premise of the show.

[2045] And I'm going to correct you because it's not.

[2046] The show is the messiness of being human, okay?

[2047] Just get it right.

[2048] Please get it right.

[2049] I regret getting that tattooed on my lower back.

[2050] It's going to go on the sweaters.

[2051] We have to have one sweater with it for.

[2052] sure for sure say goodbye to it yeah even if we have it and then we have just a line you had a good idea which is to um do a suggestion for a new tagline yeah on instagram we'll put out like hey hey hey hey arm cherries okay this is exactly how it's gonna read hey arm cherries happy thursday exclamation point happy thursday it's experts on experts day also if you want to put in your vote for what our new tagline should be.

[2053] Put it in the comments.

[2054] Yeah.

[2055] Chimony -a -moji.

[2056] Someone already suggested one that's already a front -runner for me. Yeah, but we can't say it.

[2057] We're not going to say it, but I just want it to be known that already an armchair came up with a great one.

[2058] That's better.

[2059] Also, we are going to do a new sweatshirt, and so if you guys have good ideas for what should be on the sweatshirt, you could tell us to.

[2060] You probably don't time for that.

[2061] Oh, sorry.

[2062] Rob says there's no time.

[2063] to drawing right out of this.

[2064] I was going to ask you after this if you drew that yet.

[2065] Shit, I didn't.

[2066] All right, we'll see how it goes.

[2067] You know, this is one of those examples where it's like, when we were all launching this.

[2068] We didn't know we were doing.

[2069] No, and also Rob's like, hey, we need a description of the show.

[2070] It didn't even cross my mind.

[2071] You need a description of the show.

[2072] Yeah.

[2073] And then like, we need it tomorrow.

[2074] So, you know, I sit down.

[2075] I take my best whack at it.

[2076] I don't ever consider the show is going to be successful at some point.

[2077] And they'll at some point be a billboard of this thing I write in a half to make the deadline of tomorrow's description of the show, and then you're just stuck with it.

[2078] Yeah.

[2079] That's all for Ed.

[2080] That was all for Ed?

[2081] We had so much fun with them.

[2082] It was a whole day.

[2083] Again, it was a whole day.

[2084] We've had this many times on the show, but this one is a peak where when we walked back to the hotel, we just were really struggling to figure out how that was a job.

[2085] Yeah.

[2086] To be fun from beginning to end, and that to be good job seems.

[2087] silly it does it seems silliness we were we was pinch us time it seems messy but human but also being human thank you rob thanks thanks for reminding us oh the messiness of being i wonder if we'll come all the way back around it's like a joke in a movie that got bad but then they're going to say it seven more times and then i'm going to love it for life yeah okay to be honest the place it stings the most is like when we do a show in the the host of that show like a TV show say like the host of exploring the messiness of being it just sounds it sounds terrible and then we're sitting there smiling waiting for the description to be over yeah yeah oh it's great I love it I love it sounds saccharine I guess that's it does yeah but it's all you know unfortunately yeah it is also true it truly is a good it's a good description yeah it's a very good descriptor um that's it all right all right love you love you follow armchair expert on the wondry app amazon music or wherever you get your podcasts you can listen to every episode of armchair expert early and ad free right now by joining wondry plus in the wondry app or on apple podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry .com slash survey.