#2168 - Tyler Fischer

[0] Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

[1] The Joe Rogan Experience.

[2] Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night all day.

[3] Oh, hey Joe Rogan.

[4] What's going on?

[5] Is there a left or right here, or does it matter?

[6] No, it's all mono.

[7] What's crack it, brother?

[8] Oh, yeah.

[9] Let me just get a little confidence here.

[10] I'm so small, this is like a large coffee to me. They'll make you pee.

[11] They'll make you pee.

[12] That's one thing to espresso is too.

[13] I'm peeing right now, dude.

[14] I'm just going to do the Biden, just let it out.

[15] Ari peed in that seat three or four times yesterday.

[16] Yesterday?

[17] Yeah, he pissed into bud -like cans.

[18] He's so disgusting.

[19] Ari Shafir?

[20] Oh, yeah.

[21] Every time he's here.

[22] Oh, I didn't know he's here.

[23] He pees into things.

[24] I'm trying to get him to move here.

[25] He's not going to.

[26] He's a New York rat.

[27] Yeah.

[28] But he's here all the time.

[29] I mean, he might as well live here.

[30] He's here like four or five times a year.

[31] Yeah, just good enough.

[32] It's good enough.

[33] He should.

[34] He should move here.

[35] He's so funny, man. I love watching him at the comedy seller.

[36] Because he's one of the guys that just fucking goes for it.

[37] Yeah, he definitely goes for it.

[38] It's gotten him in a lot of trouble.

[39] It all comes out in the wash, though, right?

[40] Well, if you're talented, yeah.

[41] Yeah.

[42] And he's definitely talented.

[43] He's just a wild boy.

[44] I watch the crowd when he's on, because I like to see the crowd just slowly kind of, he's working through stuff.

[45] He gets messy.

[46] I like that.

[47] Yeah.

[48] They put me and him on at the late, late shows now.

[49] In the cell?

[50] Yeah, yeah.

[51] Yeah.

[52] What is New York scene like these days?

[53] Well, I'm here now.

[54] We'll say that.

[55] With an American flag out on this.

[56] That's what it does to you, man. Dude, before I moved here, I was a 60 -year -old Jamaican woman.

[57] Look what Texas does to you.

[58] It gets you in its bones.

[59] It's just a fun thing to be.

[60] It's fun to be a Texan.

[61] Someone's the other day on the street said, because you look like Kid Rock, fuck, Zach Elephanakis.

[62] I was like, yeah, that works.

[63] Yeah, that tracks.

[64] How long have you been down here now?

[65] Oh, like two weeks.

[66] Wow.

[67] It's like a dream.

[68] This has been a weird, including this.

[69] It's all a weird dream.

[70] How long have you been doing stand -up now?

[71] I mean, I got on stage when I was 17 or 18 in high school, started doing improv and stand -up on stage.

[72] It was almost 20 years.

[73] Oh, wow.

[74] And then I went to college.

[75] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[76] So I was failing on a high school.

[77] I needed like a B to pass.

[78] And I was friends with the acting teacher.

[79] We would drink together.

[80] What?

[81] In high school, brother, public school.

[82] Wow.

[83] Yeah, we would drink together and smoke and I thought if I take his class, he's gotta give me an A or I can get him sent to jail probably for all this bad behavior.

[84] And so I took this acting class and I got on stage and he pulls me aside.

[85] Like day one, he goes, this is what you need to do with your life.

[86] Wow.

[87] And I go, okay, okay, stop drinking, stop smoking.

[88] I was like in a gang.

[89] I was growing, yeah, I was a nightmare kid.

[90] People think I'm just this nice little guy.

[91] I was a fucking monster and getting on stage and I got all that energy out and it's what I've been doing every day since.

[92] Wow.

[93] Yeah.

[94] That's cool that someone recognize that because most of the time they don't.

[95] It takes one person.

[96] Yeah.

[97] It takes one person and you know that one person literally can change your life because you're in this part of your life where you're not you don't know what the fuck you're going to do no and then someone gives you a direction and they say hey you're really good at this this is your thing that oh my god i found my thing that day you go home you're like i found my thing Yeah, he had us, first class we had to dance on stage.

[98] He was like, he goes, you're gonna fuck.

[99] Oh, he was wild, dude.

[100] He was a playwright.

[101] He'd take the Metro Northen from Connecticut, New Haven, to put on little plays.

[102] And I just thought, I just thought it was the sexiest thing.

[103] It was like this guy was like living in the 1920s or something.

[104] Right, like a real artist.

[105] Yeah.

[106] Yeah, and he goes, we're going to humiliate ourselves day one.

[107] He goes, it's going to be so bad.

[108] So everything you do after this is going to be a breeze.

[109] And I've still used that to this day with stand -up.

[110] You got to get messy.

[111] You got to.

[112] So he said, we're going to go do the silliest dances.

[113] I went home.

[114] I was practicing in the bathroom, just sweating, turn around.

[115] I've never performed.

[116] Yeah.

[117] And I get on stage and you'd be like, sillier, weirder, weirder, until you just had a mental breakdown.

[118] And then after that, doing a little Shakespeare was fine.

[119] Oh, that's an interesting strategy.

[120] Yeah.

[121] That makes sense.

[122] Break you down and go, you're allowed to fuck up.

[123] You're allowed to get messy.

[124] Yeah.

[125] And that's why I got a place here because I went to your club and I saw Brian Holtzman.

[126] And I go, wait a minute, you're allowed to do this?

[127] Yeah.

[128] Where you're allowed to say whatever you want?

[129] Well, Brian Holtzman was like a hero of comedians in Los Angeles.

[130] But he didn't get good spots, unfortunately.

[131] They put him on really late at the end of the show.

[132] And it was a wild thing to watch.

[133] You know, you're watching like 20, 30 people in the audience.

[134] This guy's saying the most hilarious but yet horrific things.

[135] And he just never got the respect that he deserves.

[136] I've known Brian for...

[137] I guess around 30 years now.

[138] When we first started at the store, we were like young hotshots.

[139] He was like this young, dark -haired, slick back, like really interesting guy.

[140] Like really, like the same style that he has now he had back then.

[141] I can't imagine him with any more energy than he has now, though.

[142] It was the same.

[143] Oh, his energy has not waned at all, which is why he's so good.

[144] You know, like some people slow down.

[145] It sucks.

[146] It sucks to see.

[147] Yeah.

[148] You know, because they slow down.

[149] You're like, you don't want to say anything to them.

[150] You know, like, hey, man, you got to pick it up.

[151] Yeah.

[152] Whatever the fuck you used to be, you got to bring that back.

[153] Just turn it up a little bit.

[154] Yeah, you're a little too casual up there.

[155] I don't say lazy, but there's, like, you're too tired.

[156] Yeah.

[157] You gotta fire the fuck up.

[158] Holtzman never lost that kind of, that fucking, you know, that fucking crazy when he gets crazy.

[159] But he didn't have a show, like a real showcase.

[160] He didn't have like a real, you know, like a real awesome spot.

[161] where he could perform in front of crowds that weren't tired and hadn't seen three hours of comedy.

[162] So now we've got him headlining.

[163] Yeah.

[164] You know, and people come to see him.

[165] They know who he is.

[166] They get excited.

[167] People have seen him multiple times.

[168] He's got a cult following here.

[169] It's great.

[170] He definitely does, yeah.

[171] So that was it.

[172] I saw him once.

[173] And then I was like, I went to like the open mic or whatever, you know?

[174] I was in town doing the Vulcan, I think.

[175] And then I go, I'm going to try to get an audition.

[176] Adam wasn't here.

[177] Flew back, got the audition, then...

[178] Did a couple spots, then did a guest spot on Holtzman's show.

[179] And then I was in the car in New York.

[180] I pull over.

[181] I'm just looking at apartments in Texas.

[182] I just call the guy.

[183] I go, hey, can I move there?

[184] I made him an offer.

[185] I made him an offer that was like insane.

[186] I'm renting.

[187] He literally goes, are you fucking with me, dude?

[188] And the next day he goes, they took your offer.

[189] And that was it.

[190] Wow.

[191] And it was like, I know Ron White calls it comedy camp.

[192] It feels like that.

[193] When I'm landing here, it feels like Camp David or something.

[194] Yeah, Ari said it yesterday.

[195] He said, you made a festival here every week.

[196] It's like a festival.

[197] It's a festival.

[198] Yeah.

[199] I wasn't sure if I'd made the right move, and then I'm on the plane, and it's Roseanne Barr, the next row back, Sebastian Manuscalco, and I'm right behind him.

[200] Wow.

[201] And I was losing my fucking mind.

[202] I'll go, this was it.

[203] Yeah.

[204] Well, whenever you don't know if you should do something and you want to do something, but then you have that little, oh, I don't know, is this right?

[205] You got to always go for it.

[206] You got to do it.

[207] You got to go for it.

[208] And you get better at that as you age, you know?

[209] Yeah.

[210] It's like you have to, you got to fuck up a lot.

[211] And they go, I don't fuck up a little less this time.

[212] Yeah, the fuck up thing.

[213] But it's also just like taking chances, going for things.

[214] It's very important.

[215] Every time I've ever done it, it's been good, my whole life, every single time.

[216] Whether it's first time going on stage, you know, even this, even like moving here.

[217] Sure.

[218] You know, because I have a family and I have a business, you know, like this podcast that requires guests.

[219] And I had all these people that already lived in L .A. I had this built -in, you know, group of people that I would have on.

[220] And it's just like...

[221] Coming out here, but I was like, this is the move.

[222] And then opening the club was like, this is the move.

[223] Yeah.

[224] And it's going to be fucking annoying.

[225] It's going to be a lot of energy, a lot of stuff going on, a lot of things to pay attention to.

[226] But that's what really needs to happen.

[227] You get to practice your hour a couple times a week and the road comes to you.

[228] That's great.

[229] That definitely helps a lot.

[230] It just keeps you so much healthier.

[231] It's crazy.

[232] How much better you feel when you don't travel every week?

[233] It's nuts.

[234] I just started touring this year.

[235] It wears you.

[236] Holy shit.

[237] Yeah, it's like getting drunk.

[238] Yeah.

[239] It's like getting drunk and then you have a show that night and then you have another show and then you fly home and you get drunk flying home because it feels like when you land like you're hungover.

[240] Yeah.

[241] He's just like, oh, why am I so worn the fuck out?

[242] And with the heat here, man. Yeah, you get used to that.

[243] I understand Biden a little more.

[244] I've been walking around, just like, where am I?

[245] Where is you going on here?

[246] Shit in my pants.

[247] Ha.

[248] You silly boy.

[249] Did you, I was telling you before this, this mayoral race in San Francisco, this might be the end.

[250] This might be like San Francisco is a failed city.

[251] I mean, it really is.

[252] But there's no better indication of how failed it is than listening to this debate.

[253] Listening to these people argue about what's important in San Francisco.

[254] This was on the Jesse Water show.

[255] You got to listen to this.

[256] How many drag queens do you know?

[257] You were at the debate last week and couldn't name any drag queens on your own.

[258] I was wondering if you could have this is an opportunity to redeem yourself.

[259] And if you could name three LGBTQ advisors for your campaign and three drag queens in San Francisco.

[260] Just imagine.

[261] Shut the fuck up.

[262] And that was the thing she was going to sit down on.

[263] This is the actual current mayor of San Francisco.

[264] London Breed.

[265] That's her right?

[266] Yeah.

[267] And she's like, can you name three drag queens?

[268] Can you name three mentally ill men who dress up like the most tardish caricaturous...

[269] Like famous or just like Pixie that does the, you know, the kid's story hour down at the library.

[270] Lexus, yeah, Lexus down at the club does the burlesque show.

[271] What the fuck are you talking about?

[272] Yeah, no, sit back and enjoy.

[273] This is sit back and enjoy the show.

[274] When wokeism just takes on this energy and it gets crazier and crazy.

[275] I mean, look at the sexuality acronym.

[276] It used to be gay and lesbian.

[277] G .L. It is watching politicians have to recite that.

[278] Oh, it's so amazing.

[279] It's like they have a gun to their head.

[280] Yeah.

[281] Yeah.

[282] Trudeau has them all down.

[283] But my favorite is 2A