274 - Arrested Behavior

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] Hey, you guys.

[2] George and I are so thrilled to announce Exactly Right's next new podcast, 10Fold More Wicked Presents, Wicked Words, and it premieres Monday, May 17th.

[3] So Wicked Words is a companion chat show to 10fold more wicked that blends narrative, nonfiction, true crime, storytelling with in -depth interviewing.

[4] It's so good, you guys.

[5] Each week on Wicked Words host Kate Winkler -Dawson interviews journalists and writers about their best true crime cases.

[6] Guests include the filmmaker who investigated the Long Island serial killer, the forensic psychologist who spent years exploring the mind of BTK killer Dennis Rader and a New York Times bestselling author who went to school with a serial killer.

[7] Wicked Words premieres Monday, May 17th, but you can hear the trailer today at the end of this episode.

[8] So then check out the premiere May 17th on Exactly Right.

[9] And there's new episodes every Monday.

[10] Please subscribe to Wicked Words in the 10th, Fold More Wicked feed on Stitcher, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

[11] And follow them on Instagram at 10Fold More Wicked or on Twitter at 10Fold More and on Facebook at 10Fold More Wicked.

[12] Enjoy you guys.

[13] We're so excited to bring this to you.

[14] A give a bye.

[15] One, two, three.

[16] That felt real nice.

[17] That felt good.

[18] Good start.

[19] Hello.

[20] I'm welcome to my favorite.

[21] My favorite murder.

[22] That's Georgia Hartster.

[23] Thank you.

[24] That's Karen Kilgariff.

[25] Thank you.

[26] And here we are.

[27] Here we are.

[28] All the way to like that.

[29] Let's sing the whole thing.

[30] Let's sing the whole time.

[31] You don't really want that from me. I have a terrible voice.

[32] But if we do it like the music man, where you just kind of talk and do it like this, then it's more rhythmic than anything else.

[33] You don't have to worry about.

[34] I was during the March.

[35] Oh.

[36] Oh, got it.

[37] I know what marching is.

[38] What's going on?

[39] I don't know.

[40] We're still here.

[41] We're doing it.

[42] We're getting through.

[43] Everyone knows what's happening.

[44] This is a podcast.

[45] How about you?

[46] Goodbye.

[47] Well, it is, I think what you might be referring to is the fact that California is slowly reopening.

[48] It is.

[49] And people are slow.

[50] Lully still wearing masks, but going outside, going to things and public things are happening.

[51] And lots of comedy shows are starting to book and concerts.

[52] Oh, I don't know if I'm ready for that.

[53] I don't know if I'm ready to laugh is what I mean.

[54] Yeah.

[55] It's an adjustment for sure.

[56] I'm visiting my family at the moment.

[57] And it was only when I was around a large group of people at a large dinner.

[58] at my dad's house that I was like, holy shit, a year and a half alone.

[59] That's intense.

[60] Is it hard to be around people for like a lot of people for you now?

[61] Like, not that I have either, but.

[62] No, I love it.

[63] I've wanted it the whole time.

[64] And just did my really, for the first time of my life, my compartmentalizing really really served me well.

[65] Oh.

[66] And yeah.

[67] And it was only basically when I was like at dinner at my dad's.

[68] where I was looking at all the people that I spend almost every holiday with, every major anything, the solid group.

[69] And I was just like, they're the most beautiful people I've ever seen in my life.

[70] And it was just a really lovely thing.

[71] But like, man, that's a huge side effect and a huge, you know, everybody had a thing to deal with.

[72] But I think the people that lived alone, I think we all just kind of had to.

[73] cope and make shit up.

[74] Yeah.

[75] And now that it's slowly perhaps sliding into an ending, it just is nice.

[76] I feel like you got, you had a lot of pressure, people living alone had a lot of pressure to like be, to have a metamorphosis and to like, it's you time.

[77] And so there was no like, oh, that's, that sucks.

[78] That's got to be hard.

[79] Like in the beginning, you definitely had that.

[80] Had what?

[81] the pressure to metamorphosize yeah yeah I mean I'm not bragging it's been hard to like be with one other person the entire time sure and I'm sure for a lot of people the whole fucking thing was not ideal for any you could live with 18 people you could I mean you could you could you could love there was of course I and many people were just like this is what I like and it's like yeah you like it for three months totally then it's over then you stop liking it for several months then you then you have no choice then you go into the dark night of the soul there's just so many things but it's you know it was just so long and uh i hope it stays like this for a little while what about the people and myself included who got a puppy or a baby procure a baby i feel like it was like the panic of like i need a daily change please now you know yep yep I actually spent some time with a baby I know a baby a one year old baby who was born in right after a quarantine started and her mom Jen it's her first baby and she was at Mother's Day on Sunday at Adrians and Jen was like she's a little because this baby's so cute and she's walking and we're all like she's so big and no one's seen her and Jen's like yeah she's because she would walk up to you and then walk away or she'd walk up and kind of not be into it.

[82] And Jen's like, yes, she's a COVID baby.

[83] She's not used to be around anybody else.

[84] Wow.

[85] But her parents and her grandparents, basically.

[86] Wow.

[87] I never even thought of that.

[88] Oh, you know what I did read a cool thing that was like, I can't remember where I saw it, but it was like babies who are born, it's probably read it, babies who are born in quarantine and small children are going to be really good at reading eyes and like expressions through eyes because everyone's face was covered up.

[89] Yeah.

[90] It's going to breed a whole different kind of human.

[91] Psychic babies.

[92] I'm coming to you.

[93] That baby knows my thoughts.

[94] I don't have much this week.

[95] What do you have in the realm of wrecks or don't do this, do this?

[96] You know, how we tell everyone what to do.

[97] I have very little because we had basically roughly two blessed weeks off, which were so, oh my God, so nice.

[98] Like, look, this past week, last week was an actual vacation week for me. And it was so needed and wanted and revered.

[99] that wasn't the word I was looking for relished it was relished um but i the funny thing is i didn't watch that much tv um my sister you know my sister and i this was kind of funny my sister and i just started rewatching arrested development because it's just such a winner like it just gets the job done it does it still it holds up i mean there's definitely problematic stuff in a 2021 sense but the jokes are amazing it's just so fun Jason Bateman is I'm I it makes me happy that he's doing other stuff drama whatever but he's one of the funniest people ever I just have so good been his fans and Silver Spoons I'm sure we've talked about him before well the straight man character is and for everyone else to be funny off of you is like I feel like such an unsung because everyone wants to be like the funny one and the quirky one and the over the top one when you have to play the normal person it's like you're giving everyone else something like a huge Well, you would, I mean, as a comic, I'm sure you've witnessed that many times.

[100] Right.

[101] So then when you watch people who are the straight man who are also hilarious, like he's, Jason Bateman is doing a masterclass of how you do that and like how underplaying is hilarious.

[102] And how really you can say it all with one look of the eye with one fur of the brow.

[103] Yeah.

[104] But the funniest thing, the reason I bring this up is because we got, we got to see my Aunt Mary, my Aunt Mary, who's the nun, and she goes, Karen, you know what show I was watching is Arrested Behavior.

[105] And it is so funny.

[106] I swear to God.

[107] And she said it, I corrected her and she said it that way like six times.

[108] Don't correct her ever.

[109] I was like Arrested Velvet.

[110] Every time I was like, you mean Arrested Velvet.

[111] But she, because it's on Netflix now or like she's just discovered discovered it on Netflix.

[112] I just love it.

[113] I love the members of my family who are of of older generations and they still are completely interested and engaged in what like what's going on with the people like what's going on with the kids the amount of times I'll tell my parents to watch something and they fucking don't do it like even my dad is into RVing and like traveling in an RV he won't watch Nomadland I'm like dad it was made for you won't watch it I like do you think is it because he's a rebel of the 60s who's like, I decide when I watch a movie and which one it's going to be?

[114] I think they're all a little overwhelmed by having to go to different platforms to watch things.

[115] It is a pain.

[116] It is even for us.

[117] And I, they think they're just like, even if they have Netflix, it's just like not on their radar.

[118] They refuse.

[119] It's a pain.

[120] And also, I bet you I've paid for like Paramount plus three times because every time I go, I'm like, I don't know what password I use.

[121] Oh, it's just start over.

[122] is shit I don't fucking um you know what I am watching on Netflix for you younger kids who are okay with the apps uh it's my new we've talked about this and you laughed at me it's my new lunchtime show you know what I mean where I need a quick bite and I don't want to just sit there and I don't want to scroll so um it's called Ginny and Georgia and I'm sure you've seen the photo is your niece watching it it's a little risque for her this it's it's with um the this sister from Annie, Annie, what's her name from Chitzkriek?

[123] Oh, that makes so much sense.

[124] Okay.

[125] I mean, beyond gorgeous, I can't stop watching her on TV.

[126] She's like, so beautiful.

[127] I can't even handle it.

[128] And then the other actress who plays her daughter, who I'm like, shocked hasn't been on a lot of shit and a child actress since she was little because she's so talented.

[129] Her name's Antonia Gentry.

[130] She played, I think she's like in her early 20s, but she plays a 16 year old.

[131] I had no clothes.

[132] Like, this must be a Disney girl.

[133] It's not.

[134] She's incredible.

[135] And there's so, it's like, Desperate Housewives meets Gilmore girls.

[136] Oh shit.

[137] It's super risque, but it's very much like, this is how teenagers are these days.

[138] And then the mom's flashbacks into like her life and how she became a little fucked up is like, I don't know.

[139] It's a really great show.

[140] Wait, now, am I right?

[141] It's, uh, Annie Murphy, is she the one that plays the mom?

[142] No. Brianne Howie.

[143] Brian Howie, who's been in a lot of stuff, but like you is just like so beautiful.

[144] You can't stand it.

[145] Let's see.

[146] She's known for the passage, the exorcist, Batwoman, doll face.

[147] She's been on plus one.

[148] That's a great movie.

[149] So just some stuff.

[150] Okay.

[151] But so talented.

[152] I mean, not just gorgeous.

[153] She's also talented.

[154] yes all important so it's my lunchtime show like my lunchtime Vince doesn't need to be here I get a little embarrassed when he's home and I'm watching it there's teenagers tap dancing some it's like a little glee too oh okay so yeah it's a little glee too uh yeah it's good I wonder if that's uh I'll have my sister do a pass by and see if it's appropriate for it could be a preteen and it's like mother teen daughter um interactions and how fucked up they get when you you get a little older and your mom lies to you about her entire life.

[155] Shit, okay.

[156] It's good.

[157] I think your niece is mature enough to watch it.

[158] I bet she is.

[159] But she is also what I think is fascinating is she's in the mode of she, everything is on YouTube or like FaceTime.

[160] Like she doesn't really consume television the way we did at that age at all.

[161] it's a whole different thing that was our babysitter there was no scrolling there was no snippets of shit so like you watched an hour long episode of golden girls and you had to get up to pee and you'd already seen it 15 times yes I bragged you about this already but that's I invented TiVo in 19 I would say 1980 wow when we were my dad was like you have to go to the hardware store with me and I'm like but this is the one of the better Gilligan's islands and I remember going up to push the button to turn the TV off and going, I wish I could turn this off.

[162] And when I came back on, it was just frozen right in this spot and I could keep watching it.

[163] Bill Gates, turns out, you lived in the Northern California, was at listening in to your brain through the wall and.

[164] Did Bill Gates invent TiVo?

[165] Probably not.

[166] I think it was, uh, no, I don't know.

[167] I think it was Elon Musk.

[168] Yes.

[169] Okay.

[170] Here's an anecdote.

[171] I do have something to tell you that has nothing to do watching anything or listening anything but we went to a softball game of Nora's and when it was over it was like nine o 'clock at night turn around to get in the car and I look up and there's just this row of tiny lights going through the sky and they're as small as stars they're all in a row they're following each other exactly in the same space away from each other and almost like a train of stars rolling through the sky and I'm just standing there I'm just standing there I go, Laura, look at this.

[172] And then she comes and she goes, what is that?

[173] I'm like, I don't know.

[174] I start taking video of it.

[175] I have the video.

[176] You have to pose.

[177] A guy walks over.

[178] A guy walks over and goes, excuse me, because he's trying to get into his car and I'm just standing next to his car.

[179] And I go, did you see this?

[180] And then he goes, what's this?

[181] And then he watches for a while.

[182] He takes some video of it.

[183] I'm like flipping out.

[184] I'm like, that was the edge of an invisible spaceship.

[185] Like I had all these ideas in my head.

[186] Or was that the actual spaceship?

[187] Maybe they're lights.

[188] just yeah we can't even comprehend what it is my sister gets on um the website i love petaluma it's a spacex satellite thing they need banners that are like this is not a uf although that's what aliens would do too this is not a UFO hey look over there don't look up here talk to your niece it just says nothing it's nothing it was crazy it was like it was really i was like well i'm staying really calm while I witnessed this unidentified blah blah that's like but I got it on video it was really funny yeah I think we should put a video up for sure oh yeah no no you know what as I say that I'm like no I mean you can it's trees on the bottom and then a black sky and then everyone's from all I go oh my God or something like that I can visualize that for like three minutes so there's the video there's the video there's the video that's as good as it gets and I think maybe you hear the guy walk up and be like excuse me oh my god yeah you tell him to fuck off that's what that's like that's the real conspiracy is you don't want to post don't you understand start screaming in some stranger's vase do it do it yeah oh well you know what if we're talking they don't need a plug but um Jason Bateman will Arnett and Sean Hayes have a podcast called SmartList that I listen to on my drive -up that's just I mean it's just delightful they're all so funny and they get unbelievable guests I mean they get like the coolest people on that show kind of unfair it's well I think they earned it I think it's fair you're right yeah I think um they all have at least an Emmy between them that's what takes or two and that's you know what in booking in the booking world it's all about those words But the conversation is they're great.

[189] They're really fun to listen to.

[190] I think that's like one of the things I love so much about podcasting is like when people like that do it, then it really is like, oh, this is your hang.

[191] Yeah.

[192] You get to.

[193] You're enjoying this.

[194] And we get it like be a little moth on the wall and laugh along.

[195] Yeah.

[196] We're the real guests and we're honored to be invited.

[197] What's happening?

[198] I don't know.

[199] Oh, I just thought of a book as well.

[200] Oh, okay.

[201] My sister got this book delivered to the house, open the box, and goes, here, you can read it first.

[202] Where I was like, that was beautiful.

[203] That was beautiful.

[204] Yeah.

[205] No one knows you like your sister and your weird reading habits and stuff.

[206] Yeah.

[207] And she was basically like, I know this is going to be good so you can start it first.

[208] But it's Oprah's new book.

[209] Okay, so Oprah has this new book.

[210] She wrote with a research neurologist.

[211] He does a bunch of stuff.

[212] And his name is Bruce D. and it's called what happened to you conversations on trauma resilience and healing and this is the guy Bruce Perry was the guy who started the trauma conversation back when no one knew what that was and it's basically his studies talking about when stuff happens to kids everyone loves to talk about kids being so resilient blah blah but actually if you're traumatized in specific ways and in certain ways it actually affects your brain chemistry it affects your brain makeup and it it's just a fast and it's written like a conversation you'd love you would love it I know you'd love it immediately buying this and oh I bet she does the audio obviously the two of them I'm sure she does because it is like a conversation yeah it's it's good we're all going to do it's her new book club that reminds me let's have um we'll call this Oprah's book club book club where we just talk to each other about books Oprah recommends to her book club we're like the weirdos outside the window I get sued immediately for calling it that we don't care take we take that publicity you spin it into a brand new book club and then we get canceled uh here's where here's what it had space I'm in right now I started listening to the audio book of Tara Brock's radical acceptance.

[213] So good.

[214] Oh my God.

[215] That's me. Oh, my God.

[216] That's me. And then I was like, I need a break from this right now.

[217] And so I started the book that you recommended, say nothing by Patrick Radden Keefe.

[218] Oh, yeah.

[219] Troubles in Ireland.

[220] The fucking civil war that's been raging or had raged for a century.

[221] Mm -hmm.

[222] Because I was like, yeah.

[223] I don't have enough acceptance right now in my life to deal with this.

[224] I need a minute.

[225] got a chapter in let's get onto the troubles yeah again you know what the troubles will set your perspective they will they will give you a little sense of yeah of what else is going on in the world i mean and i had no idea and i'm fascinated by war and wars and conflicts and the reasons like before and after them and like i mean talk about trauma though the the like normalcy of growing up in that in a place where you didn't know who the enemy was it's all around you You never knew when something was going to get blown the fuck up.

[226] Yep.

[227] And you know, Flanagan, who owns Largo.

[228] Grew up in Belfast.

[229] Oh, my God.

[230] In Belfast in the, you know, 70s, 80s.

[231] Yeah.

[232] And he said, he's told stories of walking down the sidewalk and then the car bomb went off behind him.

[233] So he was just, he was like two blocks away.

[234] So he heard it.

[235] He felt it.

[236] But he was not impacted.

[237] But, like, saw people get blown up.

[238] as in childhood like that was the standard photos from that from the whole era of the 70s and 80s and then into the 90s it's like the photos of the children walking by armed men is like and women because like the women were in it too it's just it's just mind boggling and I just don't ever think I really understood what was going on because you know I'm a kid but right shit dude I know well it and also I think for stuff like that there's this yeah it's the kind of thing you don't strangely enough it's not it doesn't have the same it's almost like the opposite of quote unquote true crime yeah because true to me before of course this podcast true crime was just like the the 12 weird serial killers we've all heard of our whole life and that was just kind of like you that was the entry level, you know, version of it.

[239] Yeah.

[240] But that was because there was part of it that was like, this is this rare monster that lives in, you know.

[241] Yeah, yeah.

[242] There's a dragon in that cave and that's the only one.

[243] Don't go in that cave.

[244] Whereas, yeah, I'm, you know, that is basically what's wrong with humanity that we're still doing this to each other.

[245] Yes.

[246] So, so many years later in, in, in this kind of organized governmental global way that's, I'm like bumming and boring myself out.

[247] Well, and I suggest radical acceptance by Tara Brock.

[248] It really is great.

[249] It really is an incredible book, I will say, but, you know, it's hard to work on yourself.

[250] A lot of shit gets brought up and then you need time to, like, process it.

[251] So I'm doing the thing I always do, which is listening to true what you're, I agree with you with just true crime because it's like, yeah.

[252] escapeism.

[253] It's escapism and it's like safe because I'm watching it through.

[254] I'm watching it as a rerun.

[255] And you know what I mean?

[256] Yeah.

[257] So.

[258] Well, don't you love Tara Brock's voice, too?

[259] Oh, she's.

[260] Her speaking.

[261] Does she do the audio book?

[262] I just find her and her podcast, if I know I've plugged it before, but if you want to listen to it, you just look up Tara Brock and she has an amazing podcast that pretty much anyone you listen to is just a nice way to like spend a morning.

[263] That's kind of what got me through the pandemic.

[264] Yeah.

[265] Her, some old Rom DOS podcasts.

[266] And then doing some browsing here and there.

[267] but yeah it's good it's you know what I mean it's um actually useful it's not woo -woo like you think it's gonna be no at all she's so it's very useful yeah um yeah it's brain food does she talk in radical acceptance about rain the rain system of dealing with hard moments no i haven't gotten that far yet but i would okay she's she just she knows her shit she does know her shit.

[268] I started Sons of Sam on Netflix.

[269] Oh.

[270] Good stuff?

[271] Never watched it.

[272] So far I'm I think I'm about 15 minutes in great so far I mean I had to pause it because I have things to do here.

[273] I was thinking sons of anarchy and I was really surprised and then I was like well we're almost down with the Sopranos so maybe we're known of the Sopranos that we'll get into that no no no no this is The son of Sam.

[274] Yet another true crime True crime documentary on Netflix.

[275] And a friend of the family, Paul Giamati, does some of the voiceover in it, which I didn't recognize right away.

[276] And it's just, it's, it starts out with all this footage of New York City in the 70s, which is unbelievable.

[277] It's so heavy.

[278] So like, just that thing where it would be like a building and then just an empty lot of rubble and just someone walking their baby out.

[279] And mattresses and kids playing on, I don't know why kids playing on rubble with mattresses, old mattresses on top, jumping into the rubble.

[280] Like it's a fucking ball pit.

[281] Hell yeah.

[282] That's totally what I think of the like mid the 70s and the.

[283] Yeah.

[284] It's fascinating.

[285] Yeah.

[286] It's kind of like what they tried to what they made the Joker look like.

[287] It's that.

[288] Yeah.

[289] That look.

[290] Yeah.

[291] And then so like sinister is meanwhile uptown the fucking richy riches of the stock market or.

[292] snoring coke and they're rich shit and like the disparity you know what i mean like the blackout documentary or in the new york in the is it the 80s donies and it's like the disparity of like what people went through in the high rights buildings and then you know whatever town whatever part of towns that's pretty that we're low rise even more than a million times to new york i don't know what's uptown i don't know what's down uptown sounds fancy downtown sounds i don't know where that is i think you're right in general uptown is fancy downtown is it solely because of the song uptown girl that that's what we base our life on billy joel and his lyrics and why wouldn't you he's the terror brock music he knows this job you're heard it here first ladies and gentlemen hi cookie but they do talk about that blackout in this thing oh i i shouldn't be talking about it because I haven't finished it, but I like it so far.

[293] Let me tell you what happens.

[294] Spoiler.

[295] No. Great.

[296] Oh, and our friend Kyle Russell has been doing more lip syncs.

[297] My sister loves them so much that she made me come in and lay down next to her and watch them for a while.

[298] Whereas like, I really, it's harder for me to enjoy it because I'm the one.

[299] No, it's not.

[300] And then, but it's, he's so funny and delightful and.

[301] And in the most recent one, he does fucking, what's his name, Bradley Cooper from the lady, from Star is born rolling up and going, hey, and then he's, yeah, is that the character name?

[302] Yeah, yeah.

[303] Really?

[304] And it's really funny.

[305] He basically is like, now he's doing offshoots.

[306] He's doing, he's lip -sinking things that don't exist.

[307] It's really delightful.

[308] You see the one where you're in front of the shining hallway and I'm in front of a ball pit?

[309] Yes, that's the first one Laura made me watch.

[310] Stephen, what's his handle?

[311] It's Kiki with Kiki.

[312] Okay.

[313] So check those out.

[314] I've been posting some of them are my favorite murder Instagram feed.

[315] I mean, delightful.

[316] May I point out about the Stay Sexy and Don't Get Murdered, Sweepstakes announcement to, it's like a party for our paperback that's getting released that has a brand new chapter from each of us from our upcoming book so Forge Books is our publisher and they're giving away brand new gift packs of like SSDGM swag to two lucky winners.

[317] So this gift pack it includes SSDGM Bluetooth headphones a fucking hooray booklight other cool SSGM the book and my favorite murder swag and of course a paperback copy of Stay Sexy Don't Get Murdered with the new bonus content in it which is available now wherever books are sold.

[318] The paperback is out.

[319] That's kind of the point of all of this.

[320] Oh right.

[321] Yes.

[322] We have to say that this contest is open to residents of the U .S. and Canada only because it's legal things.

[323] And also.

[324] And Also, we have to say that you need to enter by May 26 for a chance to win and see all official rules at bit