#960 - Steve-O

[0] I'm here with confirmed cosmonaut, Steve O, a man who's been to space, a man who knows about the atmosphere.

[1] I can't say I've been to space.

[2] I went up in a Russian mig fighter jet to the edge of the Earth's atmosphere.

[3] How high was that?

[4] Do you know?

[5] I fucking forget.

[6] I fucking forget.

[7] But it wasn't that much higher than, you know.

[8] So a normal flight is like, what, 30 ,000?

[9] And then what's like?

[10] I've heard they've got to go high.

[11] higher, right?

[12] They can go up to like 35 ,000 for a commercial flight.

[13] I want to say that it might have been like not much more than 50 ,000, but I can't back that up.

[14] I don't remember.

[15] It was shockingly less than you would imagine.

[16] Oh, that's you.

[17] Yeah, there I am.

[18] You need a video of it?

[19] Uh -huh.

[20] Does it show that it goes...

[21] Oh, no shit.

[22] Oh, my God.

[23] Look, it's going straight up.

[24] Oh, my God.

[25] They used a lot of, uh, they used a lot of, um, stock footage.

[26] But at the same time, on the way down this motherfucker did twirls and fuck it was it was like the gnarliest roller coaster right ever uh and like and this is me filming myself like look at that dude oh my god it's like it's fucking night up there wow that's incredible that shows for anybody wants to say that the fucking world is flat that's fucking proof motherfuckers well you can see the curvature of the earth wow that's nuts and so when you were doing this um did did you get close to black out like how was the g force um i didn't get close to blackened out or anything like that and uh i thought that that it would be one thing what what it was was i was just fucking claustrophobic man it just cramped that tiny little i get claustrophobic do i didn't like that did you uh do they tell you how many g forces you were doing that's another thing i can't remember but uh i feel like there was more g shit going on when we did the uh the zero gravity plane which uh which uh You know, it just kind of goes along And then it does a big bell curve kind of deal So you become weightless Right And that one, you could feel yourself really like Being pulled down with the G's or whatever I did a flight with the FAA18 With the Blue Angels once Oh, they took me up and they take you out It's, you go down to San Diego And then you travel east Like through the desert, it's weird And I don't know which Air Force base is out there It's like real close to, I guess close to Arizona or maybe even in Arizona, but we got to seven and a half Gs.

[27] We were doing this crazy things where you go like through these mountain ranges and you're only like 100, maybe 200 feet off the ground, really low to the ground, like we're turning and twisting and fucking bananas.

[28] Dude.

[29] Yeah, dude.

[30] So they took you up in Wild Boys and what year was this?

[31] It was okay.

[32] We were cool with the Russians then.

[33] Right.

[34] That was 2005.

[35] Yeah, 2005.

[36] That was our last ever Wild Boys trip.

[37] Oh, yeah?

[38] Yeah.

[39] And we brought Knoxville with us.

[40] Knoxville, we had some, like, Russian Army kind of dudes.

[41] And Knoxville was like, shoot me with the 9mm gun with the rubber bullet while the dog bites me. What?

[42] Yeah, he was going for it.

[43] And our director, Jeff Tremaine, was like, hey, if you still have this in you, why don't we not do it for TV?

[44] Let's make another movie and that was why We stopped doing Wild Boys and made Jackass number two If you still have this in you Oh my god You still want to get it beaten out with rubber bullets We do we a lot of shit happened on that Fucking that last Wild Boys trip man There is a we always we had this practice of like For the sensors You know like it's called standards and practices They'll be like you know they'll give back notes like You can't you know show this And so we would film what we call red herrings Like just blatantly ridiculous shit It's never allowed, never going to be allowed on TV, but then we'll be like, okay, we'll, we'll cut this out.

[45] And so then we'll be able to keep some other shit.

[46] Right.

[47] So we would always go out of our way to film this fucked up stuff.

[48] And in Russia, we, me and one of the guys from the crew put on these animal suits to, what was it at the time?

[49] It wasn't panda bears.

[50] It was polar bears with a big fucking, like, mascot head.

[51] And we fucking hired two hookers and had had four.

[52] full -on fucking hookers came in like full porno we filled full fucking porno and we included that in the episode you know and the notes came back from standards and practices like can't really please like um that you have to take out the you know the cock sucking yeah the polar bear getting his dick sucked like the whole thing and that yeah and and there was there was a little bit of fucking hooker action in that one you know and I'm not necessarily that stoked about it, but there was, we went to, we went to, like, a whorehouse, brought this, um, hooker back to the hotel, right?

[53] They did, like, a whole thing.

[54] And then in, in the, and, and I don't think I ever could even have sex with a, with a hooker without, like, snuggling after.

[55] I want to, like, snuggle and, you know, I'm like, oh, no, just stay with me. I want to, like, you know, cuddle and stuff.

[56] And in the morning, this, this hooker, she just tells me, like, how much, how much I owe her.

[57] And I'm like, that's fucking outrageous.

[58] There's no fucking way.

[59] I was like, basically, I don't care if you're fucking pimp wants to kick my ass and fucking kill me. I'm not paying that fucking much.

[60] It was that much?

[61] How much was it?

[62] I forget.

[63] It was so long ago.

[64] But, yeah, I was outraged.

[65] So was it negotiated beforehand?

[66] It just wasn't in that case.

[67] I remember clearly, I was like, you want that much.

[68] And I said, I said, I'll give you this much, and that's how much you get.

[69] Period.

[70] Period.

[71] And we came out, right?

[72] Like, you know, I got to go film.

[73] And walking through the lobby, Knoxville is down there having breakfast.

[74] This hooker comes walking by Knoxville and she says, that's not Stevo.

[75] That's Cheapel.

[76] Oh.

[77] I mean, I was never even that much into, like, hookers.

[78] But, you know, in looking back, I guess I really fucking kind of had sex with a bunch of hookers because I had this girlfriend and um you know like I work like a program of recovery I got to be honest and shit and I had this girlfriend she was an English chick and she says have you ever had sex with a prostitute I'm like oh fuck you know and I tell her uh I tell what the like you know I never did until I was in in England one time.

[79] And, you know, we did this gumball rally where you race cars with all the rich guys.

[80] And, you know, they're getting hookers, and they got me one.

[81] And, you know, I brought her to the hotel.

[82] I told her to the whole story about how I was like, can you give me a massage?

[83] And she's giving me a back rub.

[84] And this hooker says, this is one expensive back rub.

[85] And I felt like she was making fun of me. And I said, I'll fuck it.

[86] And I put on some molly crew and put on a rubber, and I humped her, okay?

[87] You know, I told this story to my girlfriend.

[88] She says, I said, okay.

[89] did you was there any other ones and I'm like oh fuck you know I'm like well in New Zealand you know like there was a massage parlor and it turned out that that they just have sex with you you know like and it's a joke you know it's like I didn't like I felt like I was having sex of the prostitute but she was a masseuse like she said it's another one and I'm like well there's a time in Indonesia oh no so it just kept rolling off yeah and the thing was Because at that exact time, we were, like, she arranged this trip to go to Cornwall.

[90] It's this little surf town in England because I, like, collect pictures with, you know, of, like, different countries where, you know, and I call it my surf passport.

[91] And I'm like, I want to get a surfing photo so I can include England.

[92] She's like, she says, I don't know why you're making a surf passport.

[93] You should have a fucking hooker passport.

[94] It's so funny, too, like, driving over here.

[95] I was like thinking, man, fucking so nervous about going on, you know, Joe Rogan's podcast because how can I touch the last time?

[96] It was so epic.

[97] Like, there's never been another interview that I've ever done that has got, that I've gotten more feedback, like people just being like, dude, I fucking heard that.

[98] Like, people were like inspired, people who are struggling with substance abuse and they're like, man, like that helped me get sober.

[99] Like, I just like me and Howard Stern, like, you name it.

[100] Any interview I've ever done in my life, like, has this has been the one that I hear about the most and that I get the most positive feedback.

[101] I'm grateful to you for that, man. Well, I'm grateful for you coming on.

[102] You can't compare yourself to yourself, though.

[103] Don't ever do that.

[104] Hey, I get that.

[105] Fuck you over.

[106] It'll get you every time.

[107] I get that.

[108] I know.

[109] I saw that, like, on Jim Jeffries.

[110] The Jim Jeffrey does.

[111] I think he even did that on his special.

[112] He's like, oh, this special isn't as good as my last special.

[113] He said that on this special.

[114] You can't do that.

[115] Right, but that's the thing.

[116] Like, I'm not going to do that too much, but.

[117] Got to be in the moment.

[118] Right.

[119] In the moment, Steve.

[120] Thank you for that, Joe.

[121] You're an in the moment guy.

[122] I'm pretty good about that.

[123] But I should say, I'm not going to, like, get in my head, and I'm not going to trip myself out.

[124] But I did want to come in hot.

[125] So I just fucking came out with the hooker stories.

[126] That's good move.

[127] It's always, you're going from edge of space, the earth isn't flat.

[128] Oh, dude.

[129] And Chris Pawnee is my wild boy's coaster I guy.

[130] I remember at one point saying something to the effect of like, oh, you know, like I'm an astronaut, you know.

[131] And Pony is fucking nailed me so hard.

[132] It was so fucking funny.

[133] He says, he says, you're not a virgin because you go to the edge of the girl's vagina.

[134] It's a good point.

[135] Right.

[136] You kind of have to cross the goal line.

[137] What was more dangerous, doing jackass or doing wild boys?

[138] had to be wild boys a thousand times over man because i watched jackass and i go why these guys are so crazy but i watch wild boys and literally my asshole just tightens up my toes curl i start clenching my hands together i can't do i don't know how the fuck you guys did it and got away with it right there's no question man like uh fucking lions tigers bears venous reptiles yeah when that lion climbed a tree and bit your fucking hat here's the thing right and here's the thing and and and there's a thing a distinction about this.

[139] Jackass were completely faith.

[140] There's so much integrity in jackass.

[141] Knoxville, like would not like ever.

[142] People say, is this stuff you do real?

[143] Fuck yeah, it's real.

[144] 100%.

[145] And with Wild Boys, there's no, I mean, what you see is it happened, but what we were dishonest about with Wild Boys is like locations.

[146] We would pretend that we were in Africa when really they had this fucking in California, there's a company called like Hollywood animals, right?

[147] Where they've got like, you know, whatever.

[148] They've got the fucking lions and the tigers and shit.

[149] Now, when we went over to Africa the first time, we brought the zebra suit.

[150] Every intention of being on safari playing around in front of lions.

[151] But that just wasn't in the cards.

[152] They're like, no, that's not going to happen.

[153] Oh, my God, they'll kill you.

[154] Yeah, we filmed this great whole thing going through the safari and the two -man zebra suit.

[155] But the only way we could get the end was to come back to California.

[156] Oh.

[157] And I remember Jay Leno fucking called us out.

[158] The first time we went on the Jay Leno show to promote Wild Boys, he says, you know, I watched, he came to the dressing room.

[159] He said, I watched that lion clip with the two -man zebra suit.

[160] And I'm thinking, hmm, you know, I've never seen gravel like that, you know, in Africa, you know, on the ground.

[161] And he says, the way that the lion went for the zebra head, the, he said, no part of that, no part of that lion, wants that fake zebra head.

[162] You know, it doesn't make sense.

[163] And he was so right.

[164] He nailed it 100%.

[165] He's like, I'm guessing what they did was they rubbed some kind of shit on the zebra head to attract the lion to it.

[166] And he just broke it down.

[167] You know, the last thing I want to do is be a fucking fan of Jay Leno, but he didn't Jay Leno's a good guy.

[168] Okay.

[169] Okay.

[170] He is.

[171] I'm telling you, man. He just seems weird because he did the Tonight Show for so long.

[172] He, okay, and I'm not trying to, like, just piggyback on Howard Stern being a Stern fan, but, uh, I don't know.

[173] I got a weird vibe myself from, from Jay Leno, but I'll take a word for it.

[174] And he impressed the shit out of me with that, calling out that line bit.

[175] What weird vibe did you get from?

[176] I don't know.

[177] Like, uh, I just felt like, for all the times that we were guests or that I was on his show, I just felt like, uh, yeah, I don't know.

[178] is it yeah I think it's fair to say I felt like maybe a little bit talked down to in a way I felt like sort of like I like the impression that I got was that whoever booked us on the show wasn't him and that he was sort of like under protest like you know maybe I'm just a well he was sort of under protest for almost everything that was on his show right I mean it was really a mess look Jay Leno started out as one of the top stand -up comics in the world he was a fucking killer he was a a young guy who would go on Letterman and he was edgy and this is like you know 1970s or early 1980s whatever and then he got the tonight show and when he got the tonight show he became a tonight show host and he never put out he does still to this day it doesn't put out any stand -up you can't see it anywhere other than like the tonight show monologues he does it every week he does it every week but he does the same act oh shit yeah he doesn't change his shit it's real weird he's a weird guy but what his real i mean he's still a great comic but his real passion is cars like if you're a car guy and you go over to his place you get to see the real j leno you're like oh you should have been doing like i did his show to uh j leno's garage and i was like you should have been doing this the whole time why did you even fuck with the tonight show like you're you're a fucking monster when it comes to cars he's fun he's loose he knows everything about cars you get to see the real him he lights up I remember we were promoting Jackass 3D on the Tonight Show, went over there and we did the T -ball thing, right?

[179] Like where it's like a T -ball, but it's got an arm and you hit it, and then it swings out, it hits me in the nuts.

[180] And we did it.

[181] I think it was like during rehearsal or something.

[182] We did it like during rehearsal.

[183] Fully hit me in the nuts.

[184] During rehearsal.

[185] And I wanted to demonstrate that I wasn't wearing a cup.

[186] Right.

[187] Right?

[188] And I had these tidy whitties on.

[189] And I fucking pulled down my tidy whiteies to show it was just my dick.

[190] Which I didn't really need to do.

[191] You showed Jay Leno?

[192] yeah that's part of the problem he's so old school right and and uh that's martha ral you know i see it clearly now and he said it he's he goes it looks like a dick just a lot smaller you know right but uh that was just part of uh i don't know that's just part of where i got that vibe for me and but dude the last thing i don't want to fuck i know what you mean i know what you mean and then there was a all that dispute with him and howard stern because like what was it going on, like, writers were taking bits from Stern and doing it on.

[193] Right.

[194] I can't even remember it.

[195] Does Howard so...

[196] Yeah.

[197] Howard always hated him.

[198] But Howard hated Johnny Carson, too.

[199] Right.

[200] You know what, man, that's one of those things where a lot of those guys, you know, especially, like, if you have a platform like Howard and you feel dissed by some guy who's got another platform, like, well, fuck this guy, time to go to war.

[201] Because Howard's whole thing was about conflict.

[202] Conflict, his ratings.

[203] He was the king of ratings.

[204] With Jay Leno and Howard, it was personal.

[205] And with Howard and Carson, I think he was just, Howard had the impression that Carson was a bad dude.

[206] I don't know.

[207] I think he had a personal thing with him, too.

[208] Maybe I'm just making that up.

[209] I don't know.

[210] But I'm telling you, man, I knew Jay from the Tonight Show.

[211] I knew Jay from when I was on NBC.

[212] I've seen him on here with you, too.

[213] Dude, he was great on here.

[214] The story's about, like, doing stand -up for the mob shows.

[215] Like, seeing some psychopath mob guy yell at a priest.

[216] Dude, there were great fucking stories.

[217] All right.

[218] Well, hey, dude.

[219] Like, I fucking, I recant.

[220] Anything negative I said about Jay Leno.

[221] Plus, I should say I'm fucking grateful to Jay Leno because he had me on the gun.

[222] I was never on Letterman.

[223] No. Because that was the thing with those dudes, if you did one, you couldn't do the other.

[224] Right.

[225] Unless you're like, you know, someone who's like a humongous star.

[226] Yeah, those shows suck.

[227] They really do.

[228] They're just, I mean, no disrespect to them.

[229] But those five -minute things, where you sit on the couch, then you cut to the next thing, It's just a shitty way to get to know somebody And it's gone downhill from there Because all anybody gives a fuck about Is what's gonna, you know Take off on the internet the next day Exactly, exactly And so they're not even They're not even focused on anything Except some fucking gimmick that's gonna Some highlight real clip Right Yeah, did you see the Colbert thing Where he went off on Trump I couldn't fucking believe it I was watching it And I tweeted about this That I don't think kids today Have any idea how strange it is to watch a talk show host call the president's mouth a cockholster.

[230] Okay.

[231] It's just like, what?

[232] Right.

[233] He's talking about the president.

[234] I mean, I know it's Donald Trump, but it's still the president.

[235] There's a lot.

[236] So weird.

[237] There's a lot of weird stuff going on.

[238] And then did you see Colbert, uh, Colbert responding to.

[239] To Trump's response?

[240] How did that made me uncomfortable?

[241] Why?

[242] You know, and I'm sure people don't want to even hear about this.

[243] No, please do.

[244] It made me uncomfortable.

[245] which he's like I won and you know like I mean it's it's it's again it's just playing into you know what can I well they're playing on what he said was he got Trump to respond he was trying to get he was trying to get the president to say his name for so long and he finally did and it was right what he said was that I thought you of all the things that I thought you were dumb about the one thing that I thought you knew about was show business I thought you understood show business it's like I was trying to get you to respond and you did So I win.

[246] Right.

[247] Which is just, okay, so now the president, and this is even weird, because weirder, because now the president is responding to a guy who's essentially saying that he's a fucking troll.

[248] I mean, Stephen Colbert, multi -millionaire, talk show host on a major network, took over the Letterman spot, is now admitting that he's essentially like a guy on Twitter that has a fucking egg icon.

[249] I think that that might have been what made me feel uncomfortable.

[250] Yeah.

[251] Well, it's just low level.

[252] It's a super low level.

[253] The whole thing was low level.

[254] And it wasn't, like, all the stuff that Trump was saying about how they were going to take him off and they were going to, you know, the guy, Corden who came after, they were going to put James Corden into Colbert's time slot.

[255] Like, I mean, all the reports I saw were that they were trying to get Colbert the fuck out and then all of a sudden he started slamming Trump and now he's like number one out of everybody in late night.

[256] Well, that's how it goes in that stupid fucking business.

[257] They just have to get people to pay attention to.

[258] And sometimes that's the way to do it.

[259] I mean, maybe Colbert just got desperado.

[260] But it's, the whole thing is so fucking strange.

[261] Like, Colbert's strange, man. He's like a hardcore Catholic.

[262] Oh, yeah.

[263] Hardcore, which is even weirder that he's calling the president's mouth of Cockholster.

[264] He's a hardcore Catholic.

[265] It's like, where do your standards lie?

[266] Like, where do you draw that line?

[267] Right.

[268] Because that's not very Catholic of you.

[269] It's like the guy from Megadeth.

[270] The lead singer of Megadeth became like a, is super hardcore Christian.

[271] Really?

[272] And now won't sing some of his songs.

[273] Get the fuck out of here.

[274] No. No way.

[275] I swear.

[276] Oh, my God.

[277] And he won't perform with some certain death metal bands on the other day.

[278] Oh, my God.

[279] Come on.

[280] Right.

[281] Oh, God.

[282] It's fantastic.

[283] Man, there's something happens.

[284] I don't know if you notice this, but something happens that I've been noticing as, you know, I'm almost 50.

[285] I'll be 50 in August.

[286] Dude, bless your heart.

[287] Bless your heart.

[288] I'll be, I'll be 43 next month.

[289] Dude, it just creeps up on you.

[290] Dude, time moves faster as it goes by.

[291] If, well, you know what it is?

[292] It's like your reference to time is different because when you're six, a year is a sixth of your life.

[293] Okay.

[294] When you're 49, it's like another year.

[295] It's like, too, too, too, too, too.

[296] Also, you're busy as fuck, so the days keep moving quick.

[297] Your reference of time.

[298] I think it also fucking goes by faster.

[299] It seems like it goes by faster.

[300] Right.

[301] You have more of them to think about.

[302] I had a bit that I was working on for the long time.

[303] I don't know if I'm going to resurrect it, but the premise is that God must hate us.

[304] That's the premise?

[305] Yeah, yeah.

[306] Why?

[307] If you hate you, you'd be dead.

[308] Well, no, no. You'd be suffering.

[309] Think about, think about it.

[310] You live in like of a stevo.

[311] How could God hate you?

[312] He loves you.

[313] Right, right.

[314] Well, I mean, it's a fucking comedy, right?

[315] I mean, but the premise.

[316] It's got to make sense, though, right?

[317] Sure.

[318] And I back it up, dude.

[319] I back it up.

[320] How about you do?

[321] Okay, now, we're the only living organism, right, that can, like, watch and have an opinion of itself wilting.

[322] You know, right?

[323] That's a good point.

[324] It's a fucking really good point.

[325] You know, a fucking banana's not looking in the mirror saying, oh, fuck, I'm bruising.

[326] Right.

[327] You know, this sucks.

[328] Like, I don't look as good as I did fucking, you know, I'm going rotten.

[329] Well, what's really weird is when you watch, do you watch videos of yourself from, like, a long time ago, and you see how different.

[330] a look?

[331] Yes, but I think of a lot of people, I look pretty fucking, I look less different.

[332] Well, thank you, I look less different than other people.

[333] Now I get like super sensitive about like, you know, if I post a picture online, it's like, motherfucker's old, you know, like, you know, like that shit effect.

[334] Does it?

[335] It affects like, I wish it didn't, but it does.

[336] I'm this fucking sensitive guys.

[337] Motherfuckers old.

[338] But now I got a project that I'm working on where I'm digging up like old -ass footage.

[339] And I'm looking at And I'm thinking, I don't look that much fucking different.

[340] Fuck all these people, you know?

[341] Maybe you're delusional.

[342] I mean, I look younger for sure, but I don't like, you know, like, there was a, I don't know, like, I don't know.

[343] Well, you've kept your body in a reasonable shape.

[344] You're in good shape.

[345] You're healthy.

[346] The real issue is when people balloon.

[347] Right.

[348] I looked at Kathleen Turner.

[349] Do you remember Kathleen Turner?

[350] She went to my high school in London, England.

[351] Dude, she was so hot when she was young.

[352] And now she's like, like, she's got that alcoholic face, you know, where people don't just get older, but everything sort of balloons and, you know, your cheeks balloon and your chin balloons.

[353] Sure.

[354] So all swelling and.

[355] It's crazy, too.

[356] Like, I went to high school all four years in London, England at the American school in London, England.

[357] And there's only...

[358] It's called the American School.

[359] It's called the American School in London, England.

[360] That's why I don't have an accent, because everyone was just American at the school.

[361] Oh, really?

[362] So it was actually everyone at the school was American?

[363] Yeah, in England, they have like different fucking kind of high school.

[364] It's like, it's not grades.

[365] It's like forms.

[366] You graduate and when you're 16, it's all different curriculum.

[367] But this is in England and London and you take SATs.

[368] You have like American.

[369] So it's just like American.

[370] It's an American school in London, yeah.

[371] Your folks were living in England?

[372] Folks, correct.

[373] Yeah, I grew up in five different countries.

[374] Did you really?

[375] Yeah, I was born in England.

[376] And when I was six months old, moved to Brazil.

[377] my family moved to Brazil.

[378] No one would ever fucking guess this, but my dad was like a baller -ass corporate executive.

[379] Really?

[380] And when I was six months old, my family moved to Brazil because my dad became the president of Pepsi Cola in all of Brazil.

[381] Holy shit.

[382] Yeah, so they were fucking going, you know, they had shit going on.

[383] Like, they had live -in maids.

[384] And I was raised by fucking, like these Brazilian servants that lived that lived in the house.

[385] So I spoke my first words in Portuguese.

[386] Wow.

[387] Because my parents didn't my parents just didn't fucking pay attention to me at all.

[388] So that's what made you crazy.

[389] Perhaps, yeah.

[390] How do they deal with you now?

[391] Well, my mom died in 2003 and my dad and I are fucking tight as fuck.

[392] That's cool.

[393] Yeah, everything that drove us apart brought us together.

[394] But yeah, spoke my first words in Portuguese in Brazil.

[395] When I was two years old, moved to Venezuela, and I spoke fluent Spanish in nursery school in Caracas, Venezuela.

[396] Holy shit.

[397] When I was four years old, moved to Connecticut.

[398] So by the time I was three, I spoke three languages fluently.

[399] By the time I was five, I forgot two of them completely.

[400] And then when I was six years old, we moved to Miami.

[401] When I was nine years old, moved to London, England.

[402] When I was 12 years old, moved to Canada, lived in Toronto.

[403] And then 13 years old back to England, and I stayed there all through high school.

[404] Wow.

[405] So this is all your dad just being an executive for different companies?

[406] Yeah, the move from Brazil to Venezuela, dad got promoted to, fuck, the president of Pepsi Cola in, like, South America, I think.

[407] Oh.

[408] Maybe like maybe all of South America, I'm not sure.

[409] Then when we moved to Connecticut, I want to say that's when dad became a fucking big tobacco.

[410] CEO.

[411] Whoa.

[412] Which is hilarious.

[413] Did he smoke?

[414] He never fucking took a puff on a cigarette in his life ever.

[415] Wow, just was doing it as an executive.

[416] Yeah, fucking, dude Dad sold soda, Pepsi fucking...

[417] Just sold death.

[418] Sugar water and then cigarettes.

[419] And then when we were living in Miami, this was in 1980s and all of a sudden it came to light that cigarettes were bad for you, right?

[420] And all the tobacco companies started buying up food companies.

[421] You know, because they're thinking, fuck, we've got to get out of this.

[422] Right.

[423] And so, Dad worked for RJR, which is a tobacco company, and RJR, RJ Reynolds, what it was, R .J. Reynolds.

[424] And they bought Nabisco, and the companies merged, it became R .J .R. Nabisco.

[425] And that dad had an aberrationally good year that year.

[426] Dad ended up becoming, like, the president of Nabisco and shit.

[427] Wow.

[428] Yeah.

[429] I forget if it was, I don't really know what it was.

[430] So they didn't figure out.

[431] of the 1980s that cigarettes are bad for you?

[432] They only really, it only became a legal issue in the 80s.

[433] Like lawsuits and shit?

[434] Right.

[435] They only really got fucking scared of lawsuits in the 80s.

[436] You know what's crazy?

[437] I just read something about tobacco companies that they're making more money now than ever.

[438] That less people smoke, but they charge more for cigarettes now than they ever have before.

[439] Oh my God.

[440] In Australia, it's $20 fucking a pack.

[441] What?

[442] $20 fucking a pack.

[443] Oh, $20 American?

[444] or $20, Australian?

[445] Well, $20 Australian.

[446] What's the exchange rate?

[447] It's full parity to the Canadian dollars.

[448] Oh, okay, so pretty close to our dollar.

[449] One Australian dollar is 75 cents for American.

[450] Dude, it's so fucking funny.

[451] I was over there.

[452] I've done a couple Australia, a few Australia tours.

[453] And I went in there.

[454] They got the fucking cigarettes locked up.

[455] Like, you can't even see them.

[456] They're in a fucking, like a gun cabinet.

[457] You know?

[458] You got to ask them to unlock the gun cabinet, which you can't even see into.

[459] And then, like, it's illegal for them to even have a fucking, a logo.

[460] Like, there's no logo.

[461] There's no nothing.

[462] Like, Marlboro, they don't, they can't use the logo?

[463] The brand name of Marlborough, every fucking cigarette's, the name of the company, has to be in the same fucking font.

[464] They can't even, they can't even have the Marlboro logo or font.

[465] It's all a uniform font that says the company, and the entire fucking pack is, It's just the most, the whole fucking packaging is nothing but one gigantic photo of, like, a dead baby.

[466] Right.

[467] Like, the most hilarious fucking, like, shit.

[468] And I'm telling you, and it's $20 per pack, and everybody's fucking smoking.

[469] Oh, I think that's, that's, like, the craziest thing about it is that the more that they charge more than ever.

[470] And, oh, yeah, that dude, there you go.

[471] Whoa, go full screen with that.

[472] Jesus Christ.

[473] Smoking causes blindness.

[474] What the fuck's ever going to?

[475] blind.

[476] Smoking causes throat throat and mouth cancer.

[477] Brand.

[478] You see?

[479] Brand.

[480] And in the same fucking font.

[481] Wow.

[482] Oh my God.

[483] It's so fucking hilarious, dude.

[484] I laugh so hard.

[485] And it doesn't work.

[486] Dude.

[487] It doesn't keep people from buying it.

[488] That's what's hilarious.

[489] And dude, I mean, imagine that.

[490] Imagine picking up a new pack every day.

[491] That is so fucking bizarre.

[492] They got straight up.

[493] They got dead babies.

[494] Smoking causes emphysema.

[495] Grab me a crack of those.

[496] Dude, every single one of them is so.

[497] fucking hilarious yeah i've never seen that i've seen um in england they have a big picture of like people that have you know like lung cancer and shit on the cover and it says smoking will kill you but they don't have this shit what the fuck it causes peripheral vascular disease it makes your feet rot gangrene dude there was the the most tame picture i saw on a pack of cigarettes was um it was a picture of a toilet with with blood in the water and i forget what the point it was on that one, but cigarettes make your asshole bleed.

[498] Isn't it crazy that that doesn't even work?

[499] Like you're selling someone something that you're showing them all the terrible shit that it could do and everybody's like, yeah, worth it.

[500] Right.

[501] Worth it for a puff.

[502] I know.

[503] I used to be convinced.

[504] I remember Dr. Drew, Dr. Drew used to pestering me to try to get me on that celebrity rehab show before I was sober.

[505] And he had another project which was trying to it was focusing on getting people to quit smoking cigarettes.

[506] Were you smoking the time?

[507] I smoked for fucking 17 years.

[508] I started smoking when I was 16 and stopped when I was 33.

[509] Wow.

[510] Yeah, 17 years.

[511] I fucking smoked, man. Do you feel any ill effects of it now at 43?

[512] Almost 43 and...

[513] How's your cardio?

[514] I think it's pretty good.

[515] What fucked up my cardio was all that nitrous oxide dude.

[516] I went I went through those whipit cartridges.

[517] There's 24 per box and there's 25 boxes per case so per case there's 600 cartridges and it was not unusual for me to go through 600 in like 24 hours 24 to 36 hours what i i went i took every measure to try to limit like the fucking air that went into my lungs to try to make it like all nitrous oxide like i was the whole time i'm holding i'm holding in a lung full of that shit and i'm just with my my fucking can the the canister from Starbucks and shit.

[518] I was like a fucking wizard at like loading up six into while holding the last fucking ones, you know?

[519] And, and dude, that was when all the crazy shit would go down because I would be like awake on cocaine for three days and inhaling nothing but nitrous oxide.

[520] And at that point is when shit starts popping off and people are walking around my apartment who are never physically there.

[521] Oh, so you're just seeing a bunch shit oh dude like actual fucking people man i watched a dude walk through my apartment and fucking pick up pick up my bong and take a hit and blow out smoke and fucking then like put it down and just the dude walked through the wall he was never fucking there ever whoa i had he looked as real as i do or jamie does yeah dude i had fucking like tactile hallucinations i had you could feel things big time dude like what kind of things because here's like here's my whole thing and and i kind of still believe this to this day is you know that that like our little, our little three -dimensional experience is very a small part of what's going on in the universe, right?

[522] There's dimensions, there's, you know, all frequencies, everything.

[523] And that, like, that if you do enough drugs, like, that the barriers between these different compartments of the universe and become eroded somehow, you know?

[524] Like, I started hearing voices.

[525] And to an extent, I fucking believe still that that, shit was real like these spirits that were fucking talking to me i'm hearing the voices like i had a conversation with a friend of myself weed about a very similar thing where i was saying that i think that something happens when you when you smoke pot it's not just that you get high but that the way you interface with the world changes and then the world changes because of that not not the world changes like a world change for you or for him but the world that i'm experiencing is different yeah like in the quantum physics kind of sense i don't know I'm too stupid for that.

[526] Right, me too.

[527] But what I'm saying is that my feeling about the world is that when you change the way your brain works, which is essentially what you're doing when you get really high, and you change the way you think about the world, I think the world that you experience is different.

[528] Sure.

[529] It's like, you know, like people think, like this is a very simplistic way of looking at it, but it's sort of parallel.

[530] You know how some people think, oh, the world sucks, everything sucks, and their life always sucks.

[531] And then there's people that are always super positive and super happy, and their life is always happy.

[532] There's something about when you get like really high, like especially marijuana, because marijuana is a sensitivity drug.

[533] It's almost like the opposite of a lot of drugs because a lot of drugs make you insensitive.

[534] Like alcohol makes you blunt, right?

[535] You're not aware of people looking at you.

[536] You don't give a fuck.

[537] You're like, whoa, you get drunk.

[538] You're loud and you're crazy.

[539] Your social cues get skewed.

[540] You don't see.

[541] Marijuana is the opposite.

[542] it.

[543] Marijuana, you get like really aware of other people.

[544] People will call it paranoid because you start thinking about all these possibilities that you never thought of before.

[545] But I feel like the way you interface with the world becomes very different.

[546] You're aware of all these different possibilities.

[547] You start thinking about things that you fucked up when you were in high school.

[548] You know, you start thinking...

[549] Oh, dude, mushrooms are the worst for that.

[550] Oh, yeah.

[551] Oh, sure.

[552] Yeah.

[553] God, I made a mistake.

[554] Make you accountable.

[555] I get so introspective.

[556] I mean, it's been forever since but is it too introspective i got i got too how how to like just start picking myself apart like uh and you know putting myself on trial in a sense right now like uh just too introspective or i've just like determined that i just suck you know well maybe that's just a perspective like i think the introspective aspect of it one of the reasons why it comes up it feels like to me is because there's a bunch of shit about yourself that you don't like but you don't address right so then if it forces you, hey, in order to truly live in the moment, you have to be balanced.

[557] You have to be like, I've looked at it all, and I understand I've made mistakes, and here's where I'm at.

[558] But if you've never looked at yourself, if you've never looked at those mistakes, then you have, like, this backlog of shit you have to deal with.

[559] Right, and I agree with that 100%.

[560] I agree with that, except when it becomes just a morbid fucking flogging of oneself.

[561] Right.

[562] Oh yeah, for sure.

[563] Which is what it would come to.

[564] But I feel like that morbid flogging of yourself comes from you, like the debt analogy is a good analogy, because if you're in like massive debt and you go to spend money, you're like, I don't even have any money, how am I spending this money?

[565] Whereas if you're even and you go to spend the money, you're like, no big deal, I'm just spending some money.

[566] It's normal, right?

[567] I think that when you don't have an accounting of who you are and what you've done, and especially I think the big one is your effect on other people, you know, that's the one that comes up with me on mushrooms or on pot, especially on edibles.

[568] It's like how I've interacted with other people.

[569] And even if I thought it was justified, and maybe I was justified, when it comes up on pot, especially on edibles.

[570] For me, at least, that's where I feel like the most accountable.

[571] And I have to think about, like, my behavior the most.

[572] I always feel like with the edible thing, it always feels like, could I have done better?

[573] Instead of just being like, was I okay?

[574] Like, yeah, that guy was being a dick to you.

[575] Yeah, fuck him.

[576] It's never that.

[577] It's always like, maybe I could have caught on earlier to how he was feeling and reassessed how I was communicating with him.

[578] And instead of being defensive or aggressive, maybe I could have handled it better.

[579] Well, hey, man, sounds like you're working a great spiritual program with your edibles.

[580] Well, I try to do it all the time.

[581] Sure.

[582] When I'm with edibles, like I've said this before and people go, oh, no. But I think pot makes you a better person I really do because I think all that Responsibility and accountability I wish I couldn't smoke pot but you know my pot No you know you know connected to my booze bone I hear you know it's connected to my You don't have to Right you don't honestly no one has to do anything I get as much high and as much Mental clarity from yoga as I do from anything I really do I mean if someone told me I couldn't smoke pot for the rest of my life But I could do yoga Or I could just smoke pot from the rest of my life and not do yoga i think i would take the yoga wow i really do because yoga gives me um i mean i love the feeling of pot i really do but yoga gives me um a relaxation when it's over like a there's a clarity that comes from things that is like it's friend like after like post yoga class those are like that is the friendliest nicest group of fucking people go stand you want to meet some nice folks stand outside of a yoga class when the yoga class is exiting right you'll meet like the most balanced, nice people, because they drained all the bullshit of themselves.

[583] Hey, can we hit pause so I can take a leak?

[584] Already?

[585] I know, I told you.

[586] You're an animal.

[587] Go.

[588] We're not pausing, though.

[589] He's such a good guy.

[590] He really is.

[591] He's such a good guy, and he's always, like, worried that he's not a good guy, and he's always, like, you know, like coming down on himself.

[592] We'll talk about this a little, but Al Madrigal, I'll set this up, so he doesn't have to, so he doesn't have to be uncomfortable.

[593] Al Madrigal, when he was here, was talking about he gets mad at guys like Stevo because Stivo is a guy who kind of came to stand up after he did other things.

[594] And I was like, I don't want the thing that is like what I feel is like my chosen thing in life, the most amazing thing in life to me, to be something that someone comes to as a last resort.

[595] But Al even thinks it's stupid that he thinks like that.

[596] And then so like when he said it, like Stivo was kind of bummed out, so Stivo texted me about it.

[597] And Stevo and I talked, and we were supposed to do a podcast anyway.

[598] So there was like this question of whether or not we should talk about it, like, when it came to the actual show itself.

[599] But my feeling on all that stuff is that it's whoever does stand up does stand up.

[600] Like, it's bullshit.

[601] I was just explaining that you're a great guy and the whole Al magical thing without you having to be in the room and feel uncomfortable.

[602] Oh, whatever.

[603] But I think that anybody, like that judgment thing of like, you're, this.

[604] This is not a stand -up.

[605] You're not a stand -up.

[606] He's not a stand -up.

[607] That's so insecure.

[608] It's so crazy.

[609] Especially when your premise is that you care so much about stand -up.

[610] I love what you said to me at the comedy story the other night.

[611] You said, well, I just love stand -up.

[612] So, like, I want there'd be more of it.

[613] Yeah.

[614] I want more people doing stand -up.

[615] I love it.

[616] I love funny shit.

[617] Yeah.

[618] Yeah, if you're doing stand -up and people are laughing, that's stand -up.

[619] I don't care if you're a fucking surgeon.

[620] You know, if you're a brain -surgeon.

[621] and you decide to do stand -up at night, are you not a stand -up?

[622] Like, once you do stand -up comedy, to me, you go on stage, you tell some jokes, people laugh, you're a fucking comic, you know?

[623] I mean, I don't care if it's an open mic night, you're a comic.

[624] Sure.

[625] You might not be a professional stand -up comedian, but if someone says, oh, I'm a comic too, like, okay, it doesn't mean you're good.

[626] Like, you know, like, you could be a guy who works on cars, but you just fuck up constantly.

[627] It doesn't make you a professional mechanic.

[628] You know what I'm saying?

[629] Right.

[630] It's like, but once you, you're doing it.

[631] We're all doing the same thing.

[632] You could suck one dick.

[633] Yeah, you're a cock sucker.

[634] You're a cock sucker.

[635] You might not be good at it.

[636] The guy might be, let me tell you about the way that guy sucks dick.

[637] Right, yeah.

[638] He's terrible at it.

[639] I got my dick sucked by a guy one time.

[640] I was totally underwhelmed.

[641] Yeah.

[642] Why did that happen?

[643] It was, uh...

[644] Was it on purpose?

[645] Well, it started out, like, um...

[646] A joke?

[647] No, it wasn't a joke.

[648] A bet?

[649] This happened in...

[650] December of 2002 and I was doing a show at the 930 club in DC after the show there was it's a great place fucking wasted I was just really wasted and I had this shady manager and he was really wasted too and he was talking to this person who appeared to be a hot chick right appeared to be a hot chick and and I was like hmm and so I kind of started talking to this person who appeared to be a hot chick and rude the person away from the shady manager.

[651] And I was feeling really good about it, you know.

[652] Turns out in hindsight that had we not been so intoxicated, it was rather evident.

[653] But we were really intoxicated.

[654] So we were walking away from the 930 club.

[655] If that was the safari or 931 of the two.

[656] I don't think they have safari anymore.

[657] But walking down the street, going to the next place, someone pulls me aside.

[658] you know, a friend pulls me aside and says, hey, just want you to know that person you're talking to.

[659] Was it like a, not a girl, but it wasn't, like, they didn't see what, say, that the person is a hermaphrodite was what the, it was described as hermaphrodite, meaning, you know, they mean, like, both women, and they described that the person had had a surgical operation to remember, move the male parts so I was kind of a chick right right and I was just like oh whatever I don't care you know you know I was just like oh whatever you know wound up I wrote about this in my book about like I really had the sense you know I you know we came back to the hotel and and and and the sense that I got and this is pretty fucking outrageous and take on it was that here is this person who was um kind of i don't know damage is a mean word but like you know there was something you know like this person like wanted to be loved wanted to be accepted right you know there was something to go there was some kind of thing and and i wanted this person to feel loved you know and that was kind of where the i think that like that that was part of what was going on you know i was like hey i'm gonna play ball with this person and we're going to snuggle all night okay right and so like So, and that was in the whole, in the course of the evening, there was, there was oral sex.

[660] And a while later, this is where it gets really crazy.

[661] I wasn't doing that, it's the show, Dr. Drew's Love Line show, and talk to Dr. Drew.

[662] Dr. Drew says, you know, I'm paraphrasing, he says, Steve -o, there's no such thing as a hermaphrodite.

[663] What happened was a dude sucked your dick.

[664] Wait a minute.

[665] There's no such thing as a hermaphrodite?

[666] That's what Dr. Drew told me. I don't think that's true.

[667] Well, you know.

[668] And I'm not a doctor, so I probably shouldn't say that.

[669] I don't understand that.

[670] But Dr. Drew's been wrong about pot, and he's not a pot smoker.

[671] Dude, Dr. Drew was, I love Dr. Drew almost more than anybody.

[672] But the first chink in his armor happened when I asked him, Dr. Drew, why is jerking off so much more pleasurable if you tickle your balls while you're doing it?

[673] And he said, I didn't know that was the case.

[674] What?

[675] Yes.

[676] What?

[677] How do you think Dr. Jude jerks off?

[678] I think he jerks off with his head out the window.

[679] I was like Drew, I was like Drew, how do you, I thought you knew everything.

[680] What?

[681] Your balls feel good because it feels good to touch your balls.

[682] Same way, the reason why it feels good for other people to touch your balls.

[683] Like, listen, rub your own neck.

[684] It feels good to rub your own neck.

[685] Just like it feels good to get a massage.

[686] Jesus Christ, of course it feels good to rub your balls.

[687] What a dumb answer?

[688] Right.

[689] But since you brought up the Alamagical thing...

[690] Pull up hermaphrodite.

[691] Find out if that's true.

[692] I need to know.

[693] Because I'm pretty sure that it's rare, but it does exist, that there have been people that have been born.

[694] He said, uh, fucking, uh, androgynous, I think is, is it, androgynous is something?

[695] But, uh, he says hermaphrodite does not exist.

[696] And, well, I don't, that doesn't seem to, maybe he's just fucking around with you.

[697] I don't think, that doesn't seem to make sense, though.

[698] I don't think so.

[699] Because it's a medical term.

[700] I've talked to him.

[701] about it on many occasions.

[702] Well, he, I like Dr. Drew.

[703] I don't want to shit on Dr. Drew.

[704] He's a good guy, but he fucked up.

[705] He fucked up when he started talking about Hillary Clinton's medical condition on the air.

[706] And they fired him from CNN for it.

[707] I know.

[708] You can't do that.

[709] Right.

[710] You can't do that.

[711] If you're a doctor and you start talking about someone's medical condition without actually appraising them physically.

[712] Well, you see that in the tabloid magazine.

[713] This doctor commented, but then they have to clarify this doctor, the person they're talking about wasn't ever one of their patients.

[714] Well, he made an assessment about her health.

[715] And that's dangerous because you're doing it on television.

[716] You're talking about someone who's running for president.

[717] Meanwhile, look, he's right in some ways.

[718] Like she blacked out, hit her head, had brain trauma that Bill Clinton talked about publicly.

[719] Bill Clinton talked about how she was in recovery for six months from brain trauma, from having a seizure, falling down and smashing her head off the ground.

[720] When you're 67 years old or however old she was when that happened, that's a year.

[721] really dangerous.

[722] Like, I know a lot about head trauma.

[723] I've researched a lot about head trauma.

[724] I've experienced a bunch of myself, as I'm sure you have.

[725] I know you did from Tim Kennedy.

[726] You're fucking special.

[727] I talked to you about it afterwards.

[728] I'm like, do you can't let somebody do that to you.

[729] I know.

[730] I asked him to drop me on my head.

[731] He lifted me up by my neck, choking me out with my feet off the ground.

[732] And then let you go.

[733] And they dropped me from up there.

[734] That's so bad for you.

[735] And my head bounced like a basketball.

[736] You could have died, for sure.

[737] People died from that all the time.

[738] The back of the head's more soft, too.

[739] Oh, my God.

[740] It's just super, super super dangerous.

[741] Like anytime you fall and you hit your head, this is how you have to think about it.

[742] I'm not going to do that again.

[743] Please don't.

[744] Don't think of it as hitting your head.

[745] Think about it as you getting hit by the world.

[746] That's what it's like.

[747] The whole world is like slamming into your fucking head.

[748] And I was talking to Tony Hawk about the CTE stuff.

[749] Oh, it's so bad.

[750] And he said that if you have a gene that predisposes you to Alzheimer's, then your brain doesn't regenerate or heal, you know?

[751] and so you're more fucked you're more at risk for CTE if that's the case if you have that gene if you don't have the gene then you're better off and you said so I went and got it I went and got this test and it determined that I don't have the gene so I was like okay cool and I thought about it for a while and then I had to text him like hey so what were you going to do if it turned out that you did have the gene and he's like I didn't have a plan so then I asked myself do I want to go get that test because what happens if it turns out that you do have the gene, there's nothing to do about it, you're super bummed.

[752] I don't want to be bummed.

[753] Yeah, well, there's ways you can, I guess you could probably mitigate the onset of Alzheimer's now.

[754] I would have to, like, look at what they're doing now and what you can figure out and they're working hard at it.

[755] Yeah, honest fucking on that, you know.

[756] Yeah, but, I mean, really you need medical science to figure out.

[757] Like, they have to figure out, I mean, there has to be, like, some pretty legitimate studies, and those studies take a long time because you have to follow people with Alzheimer's.

[758] You've got to try one way with one group.

[759] another way with another group and see like what the you know which group has more progress but the bottom line is anytime you're getting hit in the head it's fucking bad like tennis players get get concussions you know like people get concussions from playing soccer you know who gets brain trauma this gets really crazy people ride jet skis the bouncing of jet skis oh yeah it shakes your fucking brain inside your head and i'm only thinking of times when i got hit in the head hard enough that I actually lost time, you know, where, like, a time traveled because I blacked out.

[760] Right.

[761] Like, I got in the ring with the fucking Monday Night Raw, the wrestling.

[762] This was so fucking terrible.

[763] It was so bad because here's the thing.

[764] I was never a fucking wrestling fan.

[765] I never got into it.

[766] I just didn't understand it.

[767] Right.

[768] And so, like, when we got in the fucking ring to promote it, like, we kind of walked through what the moves were going to be, you know, with this wrestler who's since, passed away, his name is Umaga, this fucking guy, they called him the Samoan bulldozer.

[769] And so we walked kind of through what it was and like, I'm going to do a back flip off the top rope and he was going to do this and we're going to knock me over, you know, and it's pretty incredible how they just very loosely like walk through.

[770] Choreographic, right.

[771] Very loosely choreographed.

[772] But we know what the moves are and we know it's supposed to be the final move.

[773] What I did not know, and this proved to be really bad, is that I did not know that the match is not fucking over until you actually play dead you have to be like completely still so at the end when he was supposed to uh there was some fucking pretty major hit like to my head or or to my chav whatever it was i can't remember but the final hit like in in when we were doing it live it was he was seeing so much fucking harder oh yeah i know what it was he jumped off the top rope on and and and and and and landed on me yeah oh geez here it is yeah he jumped off the top rope and landed on me. Look, the size of that fucking.

[774] Oh, no, he didn't.

[775] Oh, my God, dude.

[776] So now, here's the thing.

[777] That's, it's supposed to be over.

[778] But if you notice, I'm fucking not playing dead.

[779] I'm rolling around, like, I see, I'm moving around.

[780] So you didn't know?

[781] And so here he notices, it's supposed to be over at this point.

[782] He's offended because he's like, I'm not, now, this is never supposed to.

[783] Look at this elbow.

[784] Boom.

[785] Oh, my God.

[786] He really hit you.

[787] That knocked me out.

[788] And I don't.

[789] remember anything after that.

[790] So you're, you're putting your hands, you're going like this.

[791] Yeah, I'm begging him.

[792] I'm praying him.

[793] But the thing is that I'm still moving.

[794] Oh, my God.

[795] And he's still throwing your mouth.

[796] In his world, it's not over until you play dead.

[797] But I didn't know that.

[798] See, they didn't even show the end of the match.

[799] Oh, my God.

[800] They never should, they just cut away from it because it got so ugly.

[801] And I don't remember leaving the ring.

[802] Oh, no. And then on top of that, I went home and fucking destroyed my brain some more with the goddamn nitrous to where I'm blocking out, you know?

[803] Did you talk to him afterwards?

[804] Did you say, hey, man, why'd you fucking crack me in the head?

[805] He was cool with me. I went back, I went back to, and, like, worked my way in.

[806] I was, like, with my video camera, trying to get him to fucking choke me unconscious, like, Tim Kennedy did.

[807] You know, I wanted to film that for a thing, and he was totally down, but then, like, they got hip to what I was doing there, and all the WWB brass, like, kind of got me kicked out.

[808] He was cool with me, but, yeah, that's offensive to a wrestler to get in play in their world, and not like still move around because when i when i get hit really hard like to me like i react i laughed you know like whatever like it's a thing and i you know like i'm reacting to it and right but you got that was offensive to him yeah you have it has to be final it has to be over dude i can imagine that's a giant dude yeah after what happened him how do you pass away i think he had a heart attack wow yeah but yeah that guy was great that guy a lot of those wrestlers, they get hooked on pills because they're in pain all the time.

[809] It's a big problem with pro wrestling.

[810] Pro wrestling is one of the most unappreciated or underappreciated things in terms of how difficult it is for the performers.

[811] It's one of the most difficult jobs a person can do.

[812] Those guys are on tour hundreds of days a year if not 300 days a year, right?

[813] They're constantly on the road and they're doing that all the time.

[814] They're slamming in each other, throwing each other on the ground, pile driving each other, slamming, jumping from the top rope.

[815] I get it.

[816] Massive, massive trauma.

[817] Those guys all suffer from some kind of trauma.

[818] For sure.

[819] And that was a heavy blackout, and I can think of a few times where I just blacked out because I hit my head so hard.

[820] And then there's other times where I hit my head and then starting the nausea kicks in and start barfing.

[821] Like that happened when I was 10 years old.

[822] Yeah, well, you probably got a lot of brain damage, bro.

[823] Yeah.

[824] And what's fucked up about it is that it doesn't affect me now, but that's just creeping up on me for later.

[825] Well, it definitely affects you now.

[826] It's just like how much does it affect you?

[827] It's like, you ever wake up, I'm sure you've broken up, hungover, and you're like, oh, God, I feel like shit.

[828] Well, that's how you feel because of what you did to your body, but if that's how you felt every day, you would just get used to that.

[829] That would be who you are.

[830] And when you fuck your brain up, well, the weird thing is you never go back to how you used to feel.

[831] It's not like you can hit a switch, and you go, how was I when I was 18?

[832] and I'd never been hit in the head.

[833] Let me hit the switch.

[834] Oh, so much clarity.

[835] That's not available.

[836] Right.

[837] So you just deal with how you are.

[838] Like you ever wake up in the morning and you just feel kind of stupid?

[839] You can't forget where your keys are.

[840] What am I supposed to do today?

[841] You just feel dull.

[842] Everybody's been there, right?

[843] Just feel dull.

[844] Maybe you feel jet lagged.

[845] Like, you know jet lagged?

[846] You're like, oh, I just can't feel.

[847] If anything, I'd feel tired.

[848] I'm always fucking tired.

[849] Right now?

[850] Just in general.

[851] Yeah.

[852] And I wonder if that's it.

[853] That's a factor.

[854] For sure.

[855] I got on the vegan diet, right?

[856] And I remember a while into it, it started feeling fucking tired.

[857] And I was like, man, it's got to be my fucking vegan diet.

[858] I'm pissed, you know?

[859] And then there was a point where I said, fuck the vegan diet.

[860] I'm going to eat fish again and eggs.

[861] But I was still tired.

[862] And I was still fucking tired.

[863] Do you ever get your blood work done?

[864] I should.

[865] I do.

[866] I mean, I get like full panel everything.

[867] You do?

[868] I mean, as far as like for like STDs and shit.

[869] I'm like, like, that's not good.

[870] No, you mean, you should go to a doctor that can check out your nutritional profile, and they might be, you need to do that.

[871] Yeah, they might say you're deficient on iron.

[872] It could be like a niacin thing or a B -12 thing.

[873] I do get, like, I do have that.

[874] Like, they'll tell me that my testosterone is kind of low, my vitamin D. A lot of that also comes from brain damage.

[875] Oh, yeah.

[876] Testosterone being low is a big issue with football players, ex -fighters.

[877] Your pituitary gland is very sensitive, and that's one of the things that happens to people, literally just from jet skiing, like I was saying.

[878] Skiing in general, like jumping.

[879] ski jumps and stuff like that even without even getting hit in the head just anything that causes your head to shake around a lot like I'm sure head banging like the guy's some ACDC it's the fucking chiropractor I've been to chiropractors and you know I'll go to the chiropractor and they're familiar with jackass and the shit I've done and and you know they'll like take my my x -ray to look at my spine and they're like dude I don't understand it like you're like fucking Keith Richards you know like there's no there's like you're in so much better shape than I expected you would be in except for in my neck where I've got the, what do they call it, the, callous or not callous, the, I don't know, some kind of fucking build -up.

[880] And then, I think of what's fucking head -bting.

[881] Some sort of calcium deposits or, no?

[882] Oh, Jesus.

[883] I think it's from head -banging?

[884] Yeah, some kind of...

[885] So you have some disdegeneration, some sort of deterioration?

[886] Yeah.

[887] Anyway, whatever it is.

[888] My neck is more fucked up than anything And so then there's more of that I'm super skeptical of chiropractors by the way Yeah, I'm not a big fan either I've just heard too many regular doctors say That's just horseshit Right I went to It got to a point where I was like fuck you know And I was doing some job I was getting ready to do some job And you know you go to this Physician I get to clear to you before you can You know be on like a work of TV or a movie job Right Go to this fucking physician to the stars who just did it.

[889] And she's shining a light down my throat.

[890] And she says, hmm, the opening at the back of your throat is very narrow.

[891] Do you ever find that you sleep a full night's sleep, but you wake up and you're still tired?

[892] And I was like, Jesus Christ, that's exactly fucking me. You know, I'll sleep for, you know, eight hours, nine hours, and I get up fucking tired.

[893] Sleep apnea.

[894] Yeah.

[895] So she said, I recommend you get a sleep study.

[896] Did you do it?

[897] I did.

[898] I got a sleep study.

[899] They said, I have a mild to mind.

[900] moderate sleep apnea super common you know you get a mouthpiece to fix that I know I got to but I already have a fake tooth yeah the mouthpiece fortunately for you it fits on the bottom fits in the only on the bottom and what it does is is a tongue depressor and it presses down your tongue keeps your tongue from sliding back I have a buddy I have a buddy of mine that that fix everything too I have to do that I hook you up I know a guy does it see I have to do that Yeah, immediately.

[901] Yeah, there's a doctor in Encino, Dr. Coropian, who's famous for it.

[902] Yeah, please, please, too.

[903] It's super common, like sleep apnea.

[904] Right.

[905] It's people with big tongues, your tongue, as you lay back, especially if you lay on your back, it falls back and covers over your airhole.

[906] Right.

[907] And that's what causes a lot of gagging and loud snoring, you know.

[908] But it's a huge issue for people.

[909] And that CPAP machine, man, means some people need to have it, but I can't do it.

[910] I tried it.

[911] I tried it for a while, and I was able to fall asleep, but then about an hour or two into it, the fucking thing just blowing me away and wakes me up, and I just couldn't fucking do it.

[912] It's too weird.

[913] You're sleeping with a Darth Vader mask on.

[914] Yeah, it's too weird.

[915] For really fat people, though, it's huge.

[916] Yeah, the extent that you have to clean that fucking thing.

[917] Yeah.

[918] Man, speaking of fat people.

[919] Mouthpiece is easy.

[920] Where do we go from there, though?

[921] We started out with some sort of a brain damage thing.

[922] We were talking about Al Madrigal, and then we got on dudes, sucking dudes' dicks, and then we got onto head trauma.

[923] But I felt like we had an important thing to say about head trauma.

[924] Like, what did we start off with?

[925] It was just that it's kind of bad to, you know.

[926] Oh, being tired.

[927] Yeah.

[928] I mean, I guarantee you that has something to do with why your testosterone is low.

[929] Also, you know, another thing that has to do with, like, healthy fats, how much healthy fat is in your diet because fats and even cholesterol are literally the precursors for hormones it's like how your body like one of the things that people find when they go on a heavy fat -based diet like a ketogenic diet is um their hormones jump up it's because your body that's how your body makes hormones your body uses fats and cholesterol actually to make hormones now when you say healthy fats like avocado's coconut oil avocado is interesting because it's a combination of saturated fat and un -aturated fat.

[930] And most people assume that saturated fat is bad for you, but it's not bad.

[931] A lot of that came out of the sugar industry that your fucking dad was probably a part of.

[932] The sugar industry paid off.

[933] And this was from the New York Times and a bunch of really reputable newspapers reported on this really recently.

[934] The sugar industry paid off scientists to lie about the effects of saturated fats to cover up the effects of sugar.

[935] It's really sad because so many people to this day run around worrying about saturated fat and not worrying about sugar because they're worried about saturated fat in their diet and that's what made people switch over to shit like margarine which is terrible for you they don't even recommend margarine anymore that's how trans fats got introduced into people's diet's terrible dude they're trying to make them illegal and they've made them illegal in america but they still have like another year or so where you're allowed to sell it which is hilarious they give these companies an extra year or two to get rid of all the bullshit that they made so that they can still fuck people over for 12 months and make money.

[936] They knew that that stuff was bad for you decades ago.

[937] And they've been like, la, la, la, la, not listening.

[938] Dude, I'm dying to tell you this story about my dad.

[939] Okay, so when I was 12, moved to Toronto, right, living in Canada.

[940] Dad was the president of Nabisco, Canada.

[941] And I was, speaking of headbanging, I was a fucking rabid Motley crew fan, right?

[942] I fucking love Motley Cruz.

[943] This was 1987.

[944] Shout to the devil!

[945] Right.

[946] Now, this is their girls, girls' girls' tour, right?

[947] I mean, I got fucking Motley Crew all over my bedroom walls.

[948] I'm fucking crazy about these fucking guys.

[949] Now, they come to Toronto for their Girls, Girls' Girls Tour.

[950] They're doing Maple Leaf Gardens.

[951] And the day before the concert, well, I should say my dad knew that what a big fan I was.

[952] And Nabisco, Canada, had a skybox in the arena.

[953] But my dad also knew that nobody from Nabisco gave a fuck about a Motley Crew concerts.

[954] the skybox was going to be empty.

[955] So my dad, my dad said to me, he said, hey, I know how much you love Mottley Crew.

[956] And so I'm going to bring you to the concert.

[957] We can sit in the Nabisco Skybox.

[958] And I tell my dad, Dad, watching Motley Crew through a plate glass window, sucks.

[959] And he says, all right, well, you know, basically fuck you.

[960] You know, he's like, if you can do better, then we'll do better.

[961] Then we'll use your tickets.

[962] If you can, you know, I'm fucking, I was 13, you know.

[963] Right.

[964] So the day before the concert, I see on the news, they're, like, complained.

[965] They're, like, these fucking asshole rock stars come to our city and fucking fuck around, like, one way or another.

[966] And I'm like, dude, they're here.

[967] The fucking molly.

[968] What, what are you saying?

[969] I'm confused.

[970] Asshole rock stars?

[971] Yeah, yeah.

[972] They made the news for some, like, bullshit.

[973] I forget what it was.

[974] I think they started some kind of fire or something great, but they were on the news, you know, and they were complaining these fucking guys come here.

[975] Okay.

[976] And so I'm like, they're in Toronto.

[977] They're in the city now and the fucking concerts tomorrow.

[978] So I deduce that they're in a hotel and I'm gonna fucking find these guys.

[979] I'm gonna fucking find you're 13 I was 13 and so I go fucking running to my room, right?

[980] It's like right away.

[981] I'm thinking I know all the guys and I know their real names like Vince Neal is Vincent Wharton Right like I know all their names and I'm like I can't fucking check into the the hotel as like Frank Carlton Ferrano Right that's Nikki Six.

[982] They're not gonna use their real names and I was like they're gonna check into the hotel under the name of their manager And I just guess you just knew it.

[983] Go run into my room and I fucking check.

[984] My little cassette fucking album sleeves and check everyone, it says Doc McGee, which is their manager at Doc McGee.

[985] So I'm like, that's the fucking one.

[986] I go run into the phone book and the, you know, I fucking open it up to hotel, like the Yellow Pages.

[987] And I just straight start calling every fucking hotel in the Yellow Pages.

[988] And when the hotel answers, I'm like, will you please put me through to Mr. Doc McGee's room, right?

[989] And the fucking show was like a Sunday, so it's a Saturday, right?

[990] My dad's, like, watching college football, right?

[991] I'm sitting there on the phone calling every fucking hotel in Toronto, just going down the list.

[992] Not even calling the ones with the ads, like literally just sticking to the list, so I don't miss one.

[993] And my mom's pissed because there was no call waiting.

[994] She's like, you're tying up the house phone.

[995] Like, my dad, all my dad ever wanted was for me to show initiative and to be, like, motivated for something, you know?

[996] And so my dad's, like, super stoked.

[997] I'm on fire.

[998] I'm telling my mom.

[999] Mom, I'm calling Motley Crew fucking.

[1000] And my dad, like, calls off my mom, you know?

[1001] Like, honey, like, let him do his thing.

[1002] And I fucking sat there for probably two or three hours.

[1003] Just calling hotels.

[1004] And I get, they put me through to this room.

[1005] There was one, like, false alarm, you know.

[1006] But then the second McGee's room that I got through to, the guy picks up the phone.

[1007] And I say, hello, is that Doc McGee?

[1008] And he says, no, this is Doc's brother, Scott.

[1009] And I'm like, as in Motley Crew?

[1010] And he says, how did you get this number?

[1011] And I told him, I just called every fucking hotel in the yellow page.

[1012] I just literally told them.

[1013] I said, I just called every hotel in the yellow pages.

[1014] Is the crew there?

[1015] And he goes, he goes, like, hold on a second.

[1016] Are you fucking kidding me?

[1017] That's awesome.

[1018] And he says, he goes, I'm so impressed by what you did.

[1019] And he says, how would you like if I put you on the list for backstage passes?

[1020] And I can give you tickets in the fifth row.

[1021] So he gave me two tickets in the fifth row, fucking backstage passes.

[1022] My dad, I went fucking chauffeur, my dad's a chauffeur to the fucking Maple Leaf Gardens.

[1023] We've gotten the fucking press line to the fucking...

[1024] Fifth row.

[1025] Fifth row, dude.

[1026] That's insane.

[1027] That's actually better than the first row.

[1028] You're like a little back.

[1029] It was just enough.

[1030] It was the dope.

[1031] I was fucking headbating, like, emodicated myself.

[1032] Hella brain damage that night, dude.

[1033] And I was the last...

[1034] Is that a picture from the era?

[1035] Dude.

[1036] Like, how are you not showing me with fucking Nicky Six and Tommy Lee?

[1037] Is that your picture?

[1038] No, no, no, no. But...

[1039] Is there a picture?

[1040] I just Google Steveo and fucking Steveo and Motley crew, man. When you were 13?

[1041] I was 13, I was fucking 13.

[1042] We went up to the Skybox and I put my ghetto blaster.

[1043] Fuck, yeah, I put my ghetto blaster next to the little speaker deal.

[1044] Yeah, there's me and Tommy Lee.

[1045] That's hilarious.

[1046] Yeah, and then...

[1047] Wow, how old is Tommy Lee?

[1048] There's, like, uh...

[1049] That's crazy.

[1050] Me and Nikki Six right there.

[1051] You were like a baby.

[1052] I was a fucking baby, dude.

[1053] That is so weird.

[1054] Yeah, and you know, I'm standing next to these guys and I'm like, I don't have fucking, you know, like shit to talk to them about.

[1055] But the fact that I was standing next to those guys and I was like, you know what?

[1056] I'm here backstage with my fucking heroes and it's because I fucking decided so, you know?

[1057] Wow.

[1058] Like there's something about that that gave me this, this mentality.

[1059] And then you see the top left right there?

[1060] Check it out.

[1061] Fucking all these years later.

[1062] And when they announced that they were back together and going on their Carnival of Sins tour, Tommy Lee asked me to do something fucked up and introduce them, dude.

[1063] How full circle.

[1064] Wow.

[1065] Yeah, dude.

[1066] That's crazy.

[1067] Dude, it was the dopest, man. Who's the dude on the far right?

[1068] That's McMars.

[1069] With the hat?

[1070] Yeah, he's got like a degenerative bone disease.

[1071] What's going on with him?

[1072] Yeah, like I forget what it's called, but yeah, he's like they got to like have him come out when the lights aren't on.

[1073] Oh, no. Like, you know, maybe he's doing better.

[1074] He limps?

[1075] Yeah, he's in rough shape.

[1076] Oh, poor guy.

[1077] But yeah, dude, I love that story, man. And my dad, you know, is like kind of how my dad is.

[1078] That's awesome, man. Yeah, dude.

[1079] That's a great story.

[1080] Well, thank you, man. It really made me into a monster in some regard because, like, I think that at that young age, it's like, you know, I really can fucking, you know, if you just, and I've always said, like, doesn't matter what people want.

[1081] It just matters how bad they really fucking want it.

[1082] I mean, of course, like.

[1083] It definitely matters what they want.

[1084] You want to play basketball against, like...

[1085] Of course.

[1086] Within some kind of...

[1087] But I want it.

[1088] Right, of course.

[1089] Within some fucking parameters of reality.

[1090] Right, right.

[1091] But...

[1092] It's a factor.

[1093] What do they say?

[1094] They say that luck is when preparation meets opportunity.

[1095] Yes.

[1096] Which is dope.

[1097] That's true.

[1098] I love that fucking saying.

[1099] Yeah, there's a lot of variables.

[1100] And you can control some of them.

[1101] Right.

[1102] Yeah.

[1103] And you definitely...

[1104] You can control some of them.

[1105] And now like with fucking stand -up.

[1106] And I really want to, like, you brought up Alla Magic, I'm only going to say this, like, quickly, and I want to be careful not to lynch the guy because, you know, I do like that guy.

[1107] I don't want everyone to do it all, fuck, that guy.

[1108] From everything I understand, he's hilarious.

[1109] He's a great guy.

[1110] He's a great guy.

[1111] He's hilarious.

[1112] And you should absolutely check out his comedy special on the showtime, which is called Shrimp and Ain't Easy.

[1113] To decide for yourself, is this guy fucking funny.

[1114] Yes, he's very funny.

[1115] he's very funny now i never met the guy i didn't know shit about him but but um and this was this was uh was a was a 2000 12 or 2013 i i had been the headline comedy clubs since 2010 you know i got into it and i was just so you've been doing stand -up for seven years now yeah well technically it's been it's been almost 11 years since the first time i ever tried it which was uh at the lap factory when skyler stone in 2006 asked me to do a stunt at the at the laugh factory because he's hosting a show and he wants to you know so i'm like yeah i'll do a fucking stunt like whatever and i showed up i had no game plan when i walked in just as i said i i said i can't there's nothing fucking crazier than me getting on stage right trying to make people laugh that's the stunt that was i was terrified and so i tried it that night but i never got like really hardcore like in earnest until 2010 now 2012 2012 2013 i'm at a point where I'm super comfortable in my in my 45 minutes right like my whatever my hour is at that point my like I'm just really comfortable in it and I'm starting to feel like stale because I'm fucking going through the motions and the shit like uh you know what that's like right you get to a point where you're just like fucking dying because I'm not you know not doing anything new not doing anything new and and and and the worst is if is if you go back to a fucking place and do the same material that's you know and i don't i don't ever want to fucking do that like so so i'm like okay i don't my comfort zone and i got to get out of it but i ended but i just wasn't doing it as i finally put my put my put my foot on i said fuck it okay this is what i'm doing i'm promising myself i'm gonna go do 10 minutes i'm gonna do a 10 minute set here in l .a and and even if i have to i put it on my fucking calendar for one week later and even if i have to bomb i'm not backing out period i'm going i'm doing 10 10 new minutes and i wrote fucking 10 i wrote a fucking set and i went over to the laugh factory and i did it and i was thrilled i got some laughs you know then i go over to the fucking um the improv and i'm like hey you know and i made the mistake it was a mistake where i say hey i'm working on some new material you never say that when you're working on new material to the audience yeah yeah right but but i mentioned i say hey or maybe i did it and then i said hey guys thanks you know that like i was trying some new material and then thanks for you know and i and i diligently recorded the fucking set to play it back and hear where the laughs were.

[1116] And, you know, like, I wrote my own shit.

[1117] I went there and I fucking did new shit and I worked it out and I recorded it.

[1118] And, you know, that's how you do it.

[1119] Right.

[1120] Well, when I get off the stage and I'm thrilled because the fucking people laughed, you know?

[1121] And I sit in the crowd.

[1122] I sit in the crowd.

[1123] The host brings up the next comic.

[1124] The next comic is Al Madrigal.

[1125] He walks out and he goes, oh my God, what did we just see?

[1126] We just saw Steveo.

[1127] working on new material.

[1128] I just, I, and he's just like, I just, I just can't take it anymore.

[1129] Like, I just, I just can't believe that, you know, that, this thing that, that I consider my calling in life, stand -up comedy, that I care about it so much.

[1130] And now we have Steveo and Dustin Diamond out here doing this thing.

[1131] He's like, I can't believe that these people are taking something that's so sacred to me and just using it as their last resort.

[1132] And I'm sitting right there watching them say this shit.

[1133] I'm like, what the fuck?

[1134] You know?

[1135] Like, what the fuck are you doing?

[1136] It was just an, it was such a blatant attack from the stage, you know?

[1137] And I'm like, I'm like, it's not fucking right because A, motherfuckers were laughing, you know?

[1138] I played it back, like, I got in the car right after that, you know?

[1139] I sat there, I couldn't even believe it.

[1140] And then there was a lady that was talking at her table, and he just went in on her, like, beyond what was, like, hey, be quiet.

[1141] You know, starting in with, like, the personal, like, whatever.

[1142] And I don't even, I don't even care.

[1143] But what I perceived was that here's a guy who's claiming that his whole passionate stand -up comedy, but his whole attack on me and then berating the woman, like, there weren't any jokes, you know?

[1144] Like, it was almost like he just forewent the act of performing comedy to just sort of be mean to me Because he was upset that you were doing stand -up He's upset that I was doing a stand -up And whatever But then after his set And he went in and started telling jokes after that But after his set he comes over to the sound booth And I'm sitting right next to the sound booth Sitting right next to it And he comes over and says something to the sound guy And kind of awkwardly notices I'm sitting right there And then he comes over and he leans over the table And he says, just so you know What you're doing isn't taken lightly Like face to face I felt like he totally insulted me. Just so you know what you're doing isn't taken lightly.

[1145] Like, I don't even know what it meant, but it was clear that the sentiment was like, and I meant everything I said.

[1146] I felt like he came and insulted me to my face on top of that.

[1147] And I was just, I was pretty bent out of shape about it, but I didn't like say anything or, you know, and I certainly wouldn't have come here to talk about that at all, except what was it?

[1148] I was on here a couple weeks ago.

[1149] And, like, I see in my Twitter feed, like, my name is tagged, and it says, listen to the podcast, douche.

[1150] And I'm like, huh?

[1151] And I'm like, okay, so Al was on the Joe Rogan podcast, and I guess he's telling me to listen to it.

[1152] And then there was more, like, Brendan Schaub replied, and they're all playing nice.

[1153] And I just flugged, so I started listening to the Al Madrigal thing.

[1154] And he's, and, like, right out of the gate, he's saying, like, oh, man, I have this habit where I, like, kind of, create problems.

[1155] I just I talk shit on people and I create beefs and it's really counterproductive and I should work on it and I you know like it's not a good thing and he basically went on to apologize to everybody under the sun you know like and then my name comes up and he makes the distinction that oh well I actually don't feel bad about fucking talking shit on Steve I don't feel he says I actually don't feel bad about this at all and then he goes on to repeat like all the shit that he said from the stage And, like, I got so bad out of fucking shave that night.

[1156] You saw I texted you.

[1157] I know, we talked.

[1158] Yeah.

[1159] And whatever.

[1160] Like, he's just, you made the great point.

[1161] He said, hey, you know, he does that shit sometimes.

[1162] He says dumb shit.

[1163] And I actually had a conversation with him about it.

[1164] And it was a hilarious conversation because he was like, he calls me up and I answered the phone.

[1165] He's like, how are you doing?

[1166] I'm like, well, not that fucking good.

[1167] You know, I was so fucking pissed.

[1168] I didn't even really fucking sleep last night.

[1169] You know.

[1170] Were you that pissed?

[1171] I was.

[1172] I was fucking.

[1173] kept you up it kept me up dude that's crazy why how do you let other people affect you that much that's a great question it's a really do you meditate at all i haven't i got into the tm and i've been doing it very fucking little i got to do it way more yeah you do you can't let someone fuck rent space in your head like that i know because what he said was very mild it was it was and we said in the podcast he was also kind of conciliatory it was like no conciliatory to everybody but me that's what i think what bothered me so much he goes he goes he goes i feel bad i do this he goes but then but then when it comes to stevo i actually don't feel bad about this one it's so stupid what you do is funny i've seen you i've seen you do stand -up you're funny well thank you man i appreciate you're a comic in my mind hey i appreciate that so much and i think that what what particularly fucking got me hot about that was that the time that he chose to attack me was when i had fucking when i was really working the of fucking comedy writing my own material going out there getting outside of my comfort zone right doing fucking new shit diligently recording it fucking like doing actual stand -up yeah that's the craft yeah that's the fucking craft and it was just a fucking shitty time well he really does care about stand -up comedy but i think because of that caring it sometimes it blinds you you know and i'm very sensitive to it because i experienced it a lot when i was first starting out where people didn't think that i fit into the mold of what they thought a stand -up which should be sure you know And I'm glad that you make that point because, yeah, it was fucking mild.

[1174] The fact that I got bent out of shape the way I did is bullshit.

[1175] And the fact that, you know, and even now I'm starting.

[1176] You're such a public figure, too, and your career has been so controversial.

[1177] That's why I don't understand why you're so sensitive to criticism because you, you've, everything you've done has been chaos.

[1178] You know, you've done so much chaos.

[1179] I mean, I just would imagine there's so many people who shit on you.

[1180] I guess.

[1181] I don't know.

[1182] I just think that, like, I just, I fucking care about comedy, you know.

[1183] I would imagine him saying that to you in person just so you know what you're doing is not taken lightly.

[1184] I would probably smack him.

[1185] I really would have a really hard time with that.

[1186] Like what?

[1187] Doing stand -up?

[1188] That's not taken lightly?

[1189] What do you own stand -up?

[1190] You know, your fucking mind?

[1191] This is what I said to you the other day.

[1192] Don't you like stand -up?

[1193] I like stand -up.

[1194] I want my fucking mailman to try it.

[1195] He might be funny.

[1196] Dude, one of the funniest guys I ever fucking met was a private detective that I worked for.

[1197] He lost his license in a DUI, and I wound up being his driver, and he needed a driver.

[1198] He needed an assistant, in quotes, but really what he needed is a guy to drive him around because he lost his license for six months or something like that.

[1199] So I worked for him for like six months.

[1200] He was the funniest fucking guy I ever met in my life.

[1201] And while I was doing stand -up, I think I was 21 at the time, and I think he was probably 35, 36.

[1202] I was like, this guy just did stand -up.

[1203] He would fucking put me out of business.

[1204] That's all I could think of is like if this guy went into stand -up You know meanwhile he was a man He had experienced life I was a boy right But everybody that you like That wants to do stand -up You should encourage them to do it Like my friend Brendan Chob He does stand -up And he faces the same shit People are like this fucking guy He's doing stand -up Bullshit I heard about Eric Griffin Very similar Eric Griffin shit on him But Eric was just being funny And I said to him I go of course they're going to shit on you You're a big handsome gorilla and you're on stage.

[1205] He is, shockingly good -looking.

[1206] He's a good -looking fellow.

[1207] He's a great dude.

[1208] He's a great guy, and he's funny.

[1209] He's fucking funny, and I told him he should do stand -up.

[1210] And he's smart.

[1211] He's very smart.

[1212] And he works hard.

[1213] Yeah.

[1214] He's been doing stand -up a year, and he's killing.

[1215] He does really well.

[1216] I saw him the other night at the comedy store sandwiched in between me and Dane Cook.

[1217] Swimming with Sharks.

[1218] He was doing a real show, like at a real show, and he had a real good set.

[1219] Dane Cook helped me a lot, man. I know he's a polarizing figure, but when I first, I said when I got into stand -up in earnest, because back in 2006, I was like, man, I should, I really liked this, you know?

[1220] I tried it.

[1221] I got on stage for a few minutes that first night, and people, the sense I got was that people were excited to see me. They were rooting for me. They wanted me to do well.

[1222] For some reason, like, I can be endearing to people, and they're rooting for me. And I got a few laughs, you know?

[1223] I made a couple of fucking gay jokes, whatever.

[1224] Like, you know, and before I left the laugh factor that night, I scheduled my return.

[1225] And before I came back, I wrote a set, and I came back, and it went reasonably well, and I was thrilled.

[1226] Then I got overconfident.

[1227] I was like, oh, I'm just good at stand -up.

[1228] So I fucking come back again and don't even, I don't try to work on the fucking act I had written.

[1229] I'm like, no, I'm going to do fucking, I just got to go up and wing it.

[1230] And I bombed, and it hurt, you know, it hurt.

[1231] And then I bombed again, and then I was, like, scared to give.

[1232] back to it and I was out of control with drugs so like I was really just it wasn't the time now once I got sober in rehab then like going to bars going to nightclubs that's just that's not on the table anymore you know like yeah you got to ask yourself do you have a reason to go there and I didn't have any fucking reason but I had every reason to go to a comedy club so that became like my go -to thing at night you know like from going with going out with a girl right you know it's like a good thing I got a reason to be there and I go to the comedy club and so I'm sitting in the comedy club in my early sobriety and we're looking at the stage thinking motherfucker i should be on that stage i should be on that stage but i was like scared you know and then as the the press machine was that wasn't even real like this is the first thing i even did ostensibly to promote jackass 3d was this young hollywood interview and they said oh dane cook's in there just go barge into his interview it'll be great so i walk into dain cook's interview and i meet him and i'm like hey dude like uh you know i've dabbled in stand up but I want to get serious about it.

[1233] I want to really dive in.

[1234] And fucking, to his credit, man, he said, cool.

[1235] He said, let's do it.

[1236] I'll give you my number.

[1237] We'll get you on stage at the improv in a week.

[1238] And he gave me his number, and I fucking wrote, and I wrote that whole fucking week.

[1239] And I went in a fucking practice of that shitty little, the open mic, Marty's.

[1240] It's hilarious.

[1241] You wouldn't even know about it.

[1242] Where's Marty's?

[1243] It's on Sunset Boulevard right by Rock and Roll Rouse.

[1244] It's a hilarious little.

[1245] a fucking hole in the wall, it's standing open, you know, open mic.

[1246] And I went, you know, sure not.

[1247] I met Dane Cook at the improv.

[1248] It was like two comics after Sarah Silverman.

[1249] And, you know, then I go on, then Dane goes on.

[1250] And right after Dane set, he sat down with me and fucking gave me notes.

[1251] And the first thing he said was, I'm not sending you back to the drawing board, which was like his way of saying that the material I did, like, wasn't, like, don't rewrite.

[1252] Like, it's good.

[1253] He's just worry about your delivery and your timing.

[1254] From there, I went to the fucking two nights later.

[1255] I'm the laugh factor, Dane's there.

[1256] It's just like, he took me under his wing, you know?

[1257] Like, just like with regularity.

[1258] He'd go, and I'd go, and he'd go over the other way around, and he'd sit me down and give me notes.

[1259] And I put so much fucking wind in my sales.

[1260] That's awesome.

[1261] I'm really grateful to Dane Cook for that.

[1262] Oh, play the music.

[1263] Are hermaphrodites real?

[1264] Yeah, I got the info on that.

[1265] Oh, yeah, what's up with the hermaphrodites?

[1266] They're real.

[1267] They changed the name to intersex a couple years ago.

[1268] Like the medical terminology was changed.

[1269] So is there such a thing as having a dick and a pussy?

[1270] Yeah, so there's a, here's all the stats on which is born with which, and there's different...

[1271] One in 1 ,666 births.

[1272] So I don't know which is actually the...

[1273] Androgen insensitivity syndrome.

[1274] Both parts, but...

[1275] So they don't necessarily use the term hermaphrodites.

[1276] Right, yeah.

[1277] It's still used to, like, in biology.

[1278] Oh, I see.

[1279] So when it comes to, oh, so there's like a list.

[1280] It looks like there's like 30 of them.

[1281] How many other?

[1282] 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, 4.

[1283] It's one referring to humans, I think, they stopped using that word.

[1284] Because it made people feel bad?

[1285] Jesus Christ.

[1286] So, complete gonadal digensis.

[1287] Ooh, 1 in 150 ,000.

[1288] That can't be good.

[1289] Alpha reductease deficiency.

[1290] 5 alpha reductease deficiency.

[1291] Vaginal agenesis.

[1292] Imagine it.

[1293] Vaginal agenesis.

[1294] That sounds.

[1295] like you have an old pussy.

[1296] You're born, I'm sorry, your baby was born with an old pussy.

[1297] You look down, it's like an old floppy grandma pussy.

[1298] I don't even want to know what that is.

[1299] Put that away.

[1300] But only your vagina.

[1301] It could be worse things.

[1302] Your face is cute.

[1303] So there are hermaphrodites.

[1304] There are people that are born with a vagina.

[1305] Google are, is there people that are born with both a vagina in a penis?

[1306] Are people born with both the vagina and a penis because there was too many medical terms there.

[1307] I don't know which one of those would apply.

[1308] Right.

[1309] It's kind of like with little people.

[1310] And I hate that fucking term.

[1311] Well, the thing about Dr. Drew is he's an addiction specialist, right?

[1312] So he, how much does he even know about this stuff?

[1313] I mean, how much did he really learn about this stuff?

[1314] And he's also an addiction specialist who erroneously says that marijuana is hugely addictive, which is just ridiculous.

[1315] Well, I, dude, I used to You used to do it a lot, I'm sure.

[1316] Well, but yeah, here's the thing, dude.

[1317] Like, I, at one point, I was, I was sort of house -sitting for this chick, and, you know, I hump to a strange chick in her bed and tied the rubber in a knot, which I would do, you know, and tied rubber and not, and threw it on the floor.

[1318] Her fucking dog ate the rubber, right, and like, and it was her boyfriend's dog, and I'm thinking, oh, no, the fucking dog maybe took the rubber.

[1319] up the rubber right like it took the dog took the fucking rubber for like a victory lap and it's kind of drop and it's going to look terrible for this girl so i'm like following the dog around ultimately the dog shitted out and it was hilarious but i felt bad because like you know i basically it's kind of like sodomizing the dog right okay and so then i felt like to make it up to the dog you could get the dog high when i owe it i owe it to the dog to do it myself and i'm like because this is a funny bit like to swallow a condom for the load in it Well, that would have been really funny.

[1320] What does this stuff to do with pot?

[1321] That would be really funny.

[1322] But I got it in my head, I'm going to swallow a condom.

[1323] But then I was like, okay, cool.

[1324] When I'm on tour in Europe, I'll fucking put weed in the condom, tie it in a knot.

[1325] It'll be like a skit where I film.

[1326] It's an international drug smuggler skit.

[1327] I'll do it in one country and I'll fly to the other country and shit it out.

[1328] Right.

[1329] And I did it.

[1330] It was his fucking saga.

[1331] I actually have a fucking epic, like, there's a huge, like, tent pole a bit in my stand -up right now about that whole.

[1332] I got arrested for international drug smuggling in Sweden.

[1333] Did you?

[1334] I did.

[1335] It was fucking epic.

[1336] It's so classic, dude.

[1337] Because of swallowing a condo full with pot?

[1338] That's the greatest fucking story ever, dude.

[1339] It's so fucking awesome.

[1340] Yeah.

[1341] How'd you get caught?

[1342] Because I had fucking told the press.

[1343] Like, I was like, you know, at first time I did it, it was so big that when I try to fucking swallow it, it got stuck in my throat.

[1344] And I'm just trying to freaking.

[1345] the fuck out and I'm turning you know like and then I fly I fly from Norway to Sweden and uh you know Knoxville told me how big was the Nug dude I didn't even take I didn't even break the buds off the stem so you just swallow a branch a branch of a fucking tree and it had a fucking rock a hash in there too oh Jesus in the same condom yeah and I swallowed a dick He basically swallowing a pot dick That's one of the jug Like a deep throat in the incredible hole Oh no Like show me in your fingers How big this thing was you swallowed It was uh I don't know I mean I have it's on video And that's it for my next comedy special It's on video Yeah they filmed everything I was filming it for my DVD at the time Is it online?

[1346] I'm sure it probably is But what's so I'm so excited About my next comedy special Is that so many of the stories I tell and my stand -up are things that happened on camera originally.

[1347] So I'm editing into the fucking actual stand -up, kind of like you do with the podcast, like supporting archival footage, which just demonstrates that everything is not only not truthful.

[1348] It's not only truthful.

[1349] It's not even embellished.

[1350] It's like 100%.

[1351] And so like, and I'm just so excited to do that.

[1352] Yeah, that's it, dude.

[1353] Oh my God.

[1354] Wait a minute.

[1355] It's hard to tell because of the perspective.

[1356] Where's your fingers?

[1357] It's a bad video, too.

[1358] It's, uh...

[1359] Play it so they can see it.

[1360] And that's where I'm swallowing.

[1361] It gets stuck in.

[1362] Oh, no, you can see it right there.

[1363] Yeah, that's fucking massive.

[1364] Oh, my God.

[1365] You swallowed that?

[1366] Yeah, it got stuck in my throat.

[1367] It's so ridiculous.

[1368] For people that are, like, it's like basically like an eight -year -old's fist.

[1369] It's totally stuck in my throat.

[1370] Oh, my God.

[1371] And I'm throwing up a blood.

[1372] I'm trying to throw it up.

[1373] I was trying to swallow it to go down.

[1374] You're throwing up blood.

[1375] Oh, this is so crazy.

[1376] So you scrape the inside of your body up.

[1377] I was trying to swallow it.

[1378] It wouldn't go down.

[1379] I'm trying to barf.

[1380] It wouldn't come up.

[1381] Oh, no. And so I fly to fucking Sweden because, like, why?

[1382] My buddies are like, we got to take you to the hospital.

[1383] Did you shit that out ever?

[1384] It took six and a half days.

[1385] I called him Knoxville.

[1386] And Knoxville's like, dude, you're going to die of intestinal strangulation because it's fucking going to block up my intestines.

[1387] Oh, my God, dude.

[1388] And whatever.

[1389] So it took it took days.

[1390] to come out.

[1391] And when it came out, man, you must be so happy.

[1392] I'll be my asshole exploded, dude.

[1393] That's the, I don't want to tell all my jokes on the fucking podcast, because that's fucking lame, but...

[1394] It's a big important part of the dude, there's, it's fucking the best bit, I love it, you know?

[1395] I'm proud of what I'm doing on stage, but...

[1396] Are you saying that pot is...

[1397] Well, okay, that was how I got in, that was how I first and did it.

[1398] Then I realized, okay, because I'm filming Wild Boys, every time we wouldn't, like, I wouldn't freak the fuck out whenever we went to the Far East because you know you're not going to be able to find weed and that's not okay so I anytime I went to anywhere where I wasn't confident I would be able to get weed I sat there with my, before I go into the airport I sat there with my fucking weed grinder and just grind it up like a ton and and I fucking compacted so you know it's I broke the buds off the steps you know and then I would fill up and put about like an eighth in each condom whatever nice and small I pack it up and I would swallow like six of them you know really oh yeah so when you swallowed those how long did they take the shit those ones those ones come up quick those ones would come out and and I don't know like one to two days like uh something like that how many times you swallow condoms every dude I went when I went to Thailand like even when I went to Russia like it was my fucking thing I was like that was your thing shitting out your pot that you would smoke yeah like uh yeah and there's somebody imagine when you lit it Did it ever smell like a condom?

[1399] It never smelled like a condo, not.

[1400] Wow.

[1401] But there's a lot of funny in that.

[1402] But I'm sure there is.

[1403] But that's the psychological issue.

[1404] It's not like physical addiction is what we're talking about.

[1405] Okay.

[1406] Like people get physically addicted to alcohol to the point.

[1407] Alcohol is one of the most dangerous physical addictions because when you get off of it, you die from it.

[1408] Like that's how Amy Winehouse died.

[1409] Like a lot of people think she died from drugs.

[1410] She actually died because she went cold turkey off of alcohol.

[1411] I believe that.

[1412] Yeah, it kills people.

[1413] And you know how I know that I'm a fucking true drug addict is that I watched that documentary, Amy.

[1414] Yeah.

[1415] And as I walked out of the fucking theater, I was like, fuck, man, I want to get hired.

[1416] That's so crazy.

[1417] That was the least glamorous portrayal of drug addiction ever.

[1418] And it just looked great to me. I was like, oh, my God, fuck.

[1419] That would that.

[1420] Well, there's no, there's no mistaking the fact that somehow or another that what she was doing with her life.

[1421] whether or not you could say that it was the drugs or the state of mind that she was in when she was taking the drugs she produced some fucking amazing music man right she just she tapped into it whatever it is like that if she wasn't the hottest chick like you know you know that someone's talented when they're not that hot with chick and they're a fucking huge star for singing oh yeah no she was super talented she was but i mean there's a lot of not hot chicks like adele she's who else um i mean you can i'm sure you could find some I've never really sat down and thought about it exactly it's kind of a rule you're supposed to be really hot and really this thing yeah I guess so yeah I'm trying to think like Amy Winehouse and Adele that's unfortunate isn't it it's bullshit yeah for a girl right that's got to suck right oh you know who else um it's what dicks we are but see ya who's that see is not super hot and she's I don't know who that is she um is a hugely popular singer I'm so out of the loop.

[1422] I'm not old man who doesn't know what the fuck's going on with the young kids today these fucking kids today I get it dude he had to tell me that little bow wow fakes the fact that he was on a jet a private jet I was like who has heard about that when he said that he said it was his jet and that's what he got busted he said he was flying on a private jet and someone was actually on a commercial flight with him and took a picture of him because they saw it on Instagram this motherfucker's full of shit he's right in front of me that's so fucking classic That's exactly like that, dude, Bear Grills.

[1423] Yes, very similar.

[1424] That's the same fucking thing.

[1425] Well, it's actually worse.

[1426] He's like Bear Grills, it's like he set up his tent like Ferris Bueller with the mannequin.

[1427] Well, the Bow Wow thing is indicative of an entire culture.

[1428] That's just all about like showing off your flashy shit and like showing that, you know, we're balling here.

[1429] We balling.

[1430] Right.

[1431] And I was watching a fucking documentary, a vice documentary on YouTube about Bay Area Hi.

[1432] pop and the whole thing is they're like they're talking about how it's such a fucking travesty that all the tech money came in and the area got gentrified and the whole thing is they're like our land got gentrified and the and the rap artist's talking about but they're like and i got millions you know like it doesn't it doesn't jive you can't be complaining about gentrification and talking about your millions yeah yeah right well not all hip hop does that you know there's like some socially conscious hip hop documentary they were doing it oh they were doing it that's so stupid they complained they complained of these people that make the fucking very electronics they need to make their music right right came in and man i had a terrible time in san francisco the trip i got my car broken into it was parted it outside of a fucking vegetarian restaurant granted it in the tenderline it's terrible i know but it was fucking noon it was noon it doesn't matter and i parked it right outside the restaurant and they fucking smashed from window And then for the rest of the weekend, I was at Cobbs Comedy Club.

[1433] The rest of the weekend, every single person I said, yeah, I got my fucking window smashed, my shit stolen on my car.

[1434] Every person I mentioned that to you said, yeah, that happened to me too.

[1435] Yeah, there's a lot of...

[1436] And that's starting to happen in L .A. too, man. Well, it's always happened in L .A. Well, like West Hollywood, the smash and grab is becoming...

[1437] But in San Francisco, it's the worst.

[1438] But it's always happened.

[1439] There's always been broke people that break into people's cars, especially if you leave anything like really obvious in the front seat, it's visible.

[1440] visible it's dude I was the biggest score that whoever broke in my car I had my super pack I was getting ready to go fucking film my super pack is like plus I had all the merch money from selling fucking merch You left it on your car I was going to film and I didn't even fucking think about it dude there was like Wait a minute You didn't think that you were gonna park In one of the shittiest neighborhoods In all of California With a really valuable Yes okay yes Joe But you're saying it like it's Like it's like wow Wow, it's so weird.

[1441] Okay, Joe.

[1442] I'm dumb.

[1443] I hit my head a lot, Joe.

[1444] People don't know how bad the tenderline is.

[1445] I didn't know how bad it was.

[1446] I know a guy got murdered there.

[1447] And for me, like, I'm like, dude, what could happen outside of a spiritual fucking vegetarian restaurant?

[1448] Oh, Jesus.

[1449] A lot.

[1450] That's a lot of hippies.

[1451] Right outside the window.

[1452] Plus we sat and sitting next to, we sat by the window so as to see the car.

[1453] car in our line of vision.

[1454] I still got broken into it.

[1455] How's that possible?

[1456] Yeah, I don't know.

[1457] It's spaced out.

[1458] Yeah, San Francisco is a weird place now because, like, the money that you have to spend to buy a house there is so crazy that it doesn't even make sense anymore.

[1459] Right.

[1460] Like, there was a house that was for sale for over a million dollars, and it was a fucking tiny, shitty shack that had to be torn down.

[1461] I mean, there was, like, literally nothing there.

[1462] And people like, this is the most piece of ridiculous real estate in all of North America.

[1463] right it's all that tech money i lived there when i was a kid i lived there from age seven to 11 i used to do a magic show at fisherman's war for i was eight years old i think you're telling me that you're uh at car or you're talking with the owl about it about what yeah we worked at cops together yeah but i used to live there when i was a little kid and it was just you know this was during the vietnam war it was like hippie time it was weird it was just all uh hippies and gay people and it was uh you know that was what san francisco was forever until this tech boom and now it's just fucking insane money.

[1464] If you ever go on like, I go on like that app Trulia, it's like a real estate app, and I go, what, like, what kind of houses they have in Seattle?

[1465] Like, let's look at houses, just for a goof.

[1466] Sure.

[1467] You look at San Francisco and you're like, what does 14 million buy you in San Francisco?

[1468] Holy shit are you getting fucked?

[1469] Right.

[1470] Like a regular house is like 14 million bucks.

[1471] West Vancouver is pretty fucked up too.

[1472] So a lot of tech money up there too?

[1473] I don't know.

[1474] I don't know what it is, but it's fine.

[1475] money for whatever reason I guess it's just because you know everybody uses tech and there's just tons of money in it right but those guys just seem to figure out a way to make more money than anybody there's so much money in San Francisco though it's crazy right I know so you had a bad time in San Francisco because you parked your car in the tenderloin with a lot of money and a lot of like yeah a lot of like tronics yeah laptop iPad fucking 70 D every lens three grand in cash Oof, oof, oof, oaf.

[1476] Are you doing, so you're doing like these shows, are you filming them?

[1477] Is that why you're bringing all this electronics?

[1478] Sometimes, yeah, and sometimes I'm just filming for whatever YouTube, you know.

[1479] Now, you did your Showtime special.

[1480] That was, what, a year and a half ago or so?

[1481] Yeah, it was the end of 2015, and then it aired in March of 2016.

[1482] Yeah, because I remember you getting in touch with me saying you need someone to choke you out in Texas.

[1483] I'm like, I know the guy.

[1484] Yeah, I fucking loved Tim Kennedy.

[1485] I'm so thrilled with how my fucking special came out on Showtime Oh, that's awesome I'm really fucking thrilled with it.

[1486] Can people get it somewhere Other than Showtimes?

[1487] Is it available on Netflix or any of those things?

[1488] I had the Showtime, Showtime on demand and then Vimeo And I...

[1489] Oh, it was on Vimeo?

[1490] Yeah, I think that it was...

[1491] I guess it was tied up for two years before I can go on Netflix, so...

[1492] Oh, so is it available now?

[1493] Not yet.

[1494] Not yet.

[1495] So soon?

[1496] Yeah.

[1497] That's cool.

[1498] I'm fucking stoked on how.

[1499] on how that came out.

[1500] Are you going to do another one?

[1501] Yeah, like I said, man, I'm working on doing a comedy special where I edit in archival footage, which sort of makes it a docu comedy special, which I love.

[1502] Are people born that have a penis and a vagina?

[1503] Have we figured that out?

[1504] That's how I was looking up.

[1505] Yes and no, I would say, after what I was reading.

[1506] Most of the hemaphrodite comes from having ovaries and testicles that are maybe, you have both at the same time.

[1507] there's pseudo -hemaphrodites or also true hemaphrodites and there's some sort of...

[1508] So true homaphrodite is someone who has both genitals?

[1509] Yeah, this is the best...

[1510] Why isn't that a picture?

[1511] True hermaphrodites and internal sex organs contain both ovarian or testic of a tissue.

[1512] In some cases, that means that a ball on one side and ovary on the other and others it means hybrid beasties known as ovat...

[1513] Oh, oh my God, ovatesties.

[1514] To the naked eye, their external genitals tend to be iffy.

[1515] Maybe it's a big clit, perhaps it's a team, It's an urban dictionary.

[1516] No, this is scientific.

[1517] This is a scientific document.

[1518] Perchance, it's some unholy pino -vaginal mismash.

[1519] Sudo hermaphrodites have the chromosome and internal sex organs of one gender, while the external protuberances are, again, anyone's guess.

[1520] Hmm, photo.

[1521] Click that.

[1522] Mm -hmm.

[1523] Nothing?

[1524] Oh.

[1525] Whoa.

[1526] Oh.

[1527] That's a hardcore clip.

[1528] That makes sense.

[1529] that is a hermaphrodite, right?

[1530] That's got to be.

[1531] This page also has something called a, there's a double vagina.

[1532] The clit is an ant eater.

[1533] What did you say?

[1534] A double vagina?

[1535] Double penis.

[1536] And then there's this thing down at the bottom I found, which is this.

[1537] Never heard of this.

[1538] Persistent cloaca.

[1539] One in 20 ,000 female verse.

[1540] Jina and urithra coverage converge into one nauseating funnel -like drainage hole located somewhere in the taint area between the clifference.

[1541] in the buttocks, poop, pee, and vaginal sludge mingle freely.

[1542] Corrective surgery is costly, complicated, and risky.

[1543] Don't click on that photo.

[1544] What about the double vagina photo?

[1545] Click on that bitch.

[1546] Let's see what the fuck's going on up in that.

[1547] Oh, Jesus, there's one next to the other one.

[1548] Whoa.

[1549] Why does it look like that?

[1550] It looks like a chicken.

[1551] Yeah, well, that's like an autopsy.

[1552] Yeah, that's not good.

[1553] That's when it didn't work out.

[1554] Let's go with the double penis.

[1555] Let me see a double penis picture.

[1556] Is that real?

[1557] And this isn't one of those dudes that slices it.

[1558] I don't think so.

[1559] That's a crid.

[1560] That micro penis thing's a bummer, man. Dip, dipolia, diphtha.

[1561] Click.

[1562] Two penises.

[1563] Oh, it's true.

[1564] Guys, double dick.

[1565] No, that's a slice.

[1566] That's a, this website's bullshit.

[1567] That's a 1955 image.

[1568] That's a 1955 image.

[1569] Oh, okay, so it's not a split.

[1570] It's just got a broken double -dick thing going on.

[1571] He's peeing out of his clit hole.

[1572] It's like the lizard dude that kind of, He does a lot of people do that.

[1573] That's real common.

[1574] Yeah.

[1575] They're cutting the tongue, cutting the dick.

[1576] They split their dick down the middle.

[1577] And then their pee comes out and just a big old splatter.

[1578] Yeah.

[1579] Yeah.

[1580] Well, you know, people just, they just do.

[1581] That's right, man. It's a weird world we live in, Steve -O.

[1582] Fuck, yeah.

[1583] It's another thing about my comedy special that, and who knows when I'll do it.

[1584] Ooh, that guy's got two double dicks, big fatties.

[1585] He really does.

[1586] Maybe you could donate one to a friend with a little.

[1587] little dick they do that now they're doing dick replacement surgeries well like if someone like had an accident or something happened to their dick they give him a penile replacement where they'll someone will die and they'll take his dick and sew it on to you and it works you can get an erection and everything feel it then they do it for a soldier that got an explosion I thought I remember reading that I do not remember I remember the the first guy that got it done though I believe was a 50 year old man and something happened to him and he was dickless for like a year tough year yeah well he kind of sewed back up remember he could yeah he did porn when it was done I think it was just the head of his dick she cut in half she basically just slop the top off yeah yeah yeah oh oh I'll never forget and I didn't even know this is real until somebody explained to me on the show that this actually happened but Ozzy Osbourne's wife was on some talk show that she was doing for a while and she was joking around about some woman who cut her husband's dick off and threw it in a garbage disposal and they were laughing about it.

[1588] I'm just laughing thinking about his witty spinning around inside that garbage pole.

[1589] And I went, wow, what double standards with crazy double standards.

[1590] Because could you imagine a group of men sitting around laughing about a guy cutting off a chick's pussy and throwing it in a garbage disposal?

[1591] I can't imagine a scenario where you would not only laugh about that, but laugh about it on television and think it's okay, but somehow another it was okay for her to laugh about a guy losing his dick and having it chopped off and thrown into a fucking garbage disposal.

[1592] It's a weird, creepy, double standard.

[1593] Right, but at the same time, like, if you think, like, I'm kind of close to this because sometimes people want to make, like, a female version of jackass.

[1594] where girls do like terrible shit and and hurt themselves on purpose and that just that's never going to work and it boils down to a hormonal thing because like men and with testosterone the idea is that you know we're providers and we're supposed to be like macho and prove that we're tough and so it it it becomes funny to see a guy fail and and get hurt like that's funny because right but not be victimized but with women they're with women they're They're maternal, they're nurturers, so it's not cool to see them get hurt.

[1595] You know, you blur the line a little bit.

[1596] They tied the guy down and cut his dick off and threw it in a garbage disposal.

[1597] This is not like a blurry line here.

[1598] All right.

[1599] Okay, Joe.

[1600] This is a woman who's in jail for the rest of her life because she chopped this dude's cock off.

[1601] Right.

[1602] Hey, man. It's just, I'm just saying it's weird that they thought it was okay to laugh about.

[1603] It's not, I mean, it's horrific that people do horrific things to each other.

[1604] It's no more horrific that a woman does it to a man than a man does it to a woman, People have done horrible shit to women for forever, but it's never funny.

[1605] Was it funny?

[1606] Like, did they make it funny?

[1607] Because a lot of people can make a lot of things funny.

[1608] She ain't funny.

[1609] Yeah.

[1610] Yeah.

[1611] Ozzy Osbourne's wife?

[1612] Not very funny.

[1613] No, it was just gross.

[1614] It was just mean.

[1615] But it was weird that all these women thought it was funny.

[1616] Like, oh, he lost his dick.

[1617] Oh, ha, ha, ha.

[1618] It's like, whoa.

[1619] Like, it didn't seem real.

[1620] But I guess it's also because, like, you know, like what you're saying.

[1621] It's like there's something funny about a man getting fucked up.

[1622] A lot of people feel like that about watching women fighting.

[1623] There's people that I know that are super uncomfortable.

[1624] It's like watching a Yuanian J -Chic fight because she beats the fuck out of chicks and bashes her face in and cuts them up.

[1625] Right.

[1626] Like, do you watch her fight?

[1627] I've become a major fan of UFC.

[1628] I really fucking love that shit.

[1629] And I think it's incredible how not only did women be, you know, I mean, Dana White said forever there'll never be women.

[1630] And then now not only are there women, but they're like the headliners.

[1631] Yeah, they're the headliners often.

[1632] This past weekend it was a co -main event, Yon J -Jechek, and it was a real good fight because the woman she was fighting was just tough as fuck, and she took a serious beating.

[1633] But there's a fight that she did Yon J -Chicke against, see if you pull up the highlights, Yon J -Jech versus Jessica Panay.

[1634] Try spelling her name.

[1635] Good luck.

[1636] I don't even know how to spell it.

[1637] It's so hard to spell her name that people just call her Yon a champion.

[1638] They don't even try with her last name because it's like a J and then a Z and then a fucking E. and then some letters that don't even exist in the English language.

[1639] But she beat this girl up so bad that it was fucking disturbing.

[1640] Oh.

[1641] I mean, she fucked this girl up.

[1642] Yeah, I think it's...

[1643] Yeah, there's a lot of blood in this one, right?

[1644] Oh, it's horrible.

[1645] Yeah, I still watch that one.

[1646] Well, the girl just did not belong in the ring with her.

[1647] I mean, in the cage with her.

[1648] And she's from...

[1649] Poland.

[1650] Poland?

[1651] Yeah, multiple time world Muay Thai champion.

[1652] She was, before she ever got into MMA, she was one of the best strikers on the planet.

[1653] And if you go, like, deep into the fight, she just pecks her apart for the first couple of rounds.

[1654] And then by the time you're deep in the round, she's just a mask of blood.

[1655] And Yonah is just beating the fuck out of her and smashing her in the face with elbows and cutting her up.

[1656] And then the final barrage when she, when they stop the fight, like you see blood pouring out of her nose.

[1657] It's coming out.

[1658] And the girl, Jessica Panay, all due credit to her.

[1659] that girl is tough as fuck like look at this she is a mask of blood and swelling and young jacek is just a fucking demon she's just kicking at her and smashing her in the face and the blood on her face comes from the other girl oh yeah well she probably got hit a few times herself I mean it was a fight I'm sure she got scratched and cut a little bit there's just no if she got hit at all which I'm sure she did but look at that that's these short elbows like look at that girl's face I mean it's just and you see also that she's just having a time taking it and this is the final barrage she steps forward and elbows are in the face and just beats the shit out of her and uh i had some friends that were watching this that weren't mma fans and they were like fuck this i can't watch this like look at this bang bang look at that now this this final barrage oh no way dude um what but i just had a lot of thoughts all in the same time like thinking man like what an honor to sit next to joe rogan as he essentially commentates a fight like a lot of people would want to do that and then I was just thinking oh you know like I'm such a fan of yours you know and I don't want to kiss you I'm a fan of yours too thank you man I'm a fucking big fan well we're friends we don't really have to talk like we're fans of each other we're just buddies right thank you okay then I thought fuck did this one coming up is in Anaheim one where Cormier and John Jones yeah and what an exciting fucking thing how do I want to go yeah okay oh dude you're the man you're hooked up that's it I fucking love that.

[1660] Dude, I'll be sitting right next to me. My dad's going to be in town, too.

[1661] My dad's going to be staying with me. Oh, dude, I'll give you two tickets.

[1662] One for your dad.

[1663] Oh, fucking cool.

[1664] You and your dad.

[1665] I want to meet your dad.

[1666] I want to hear about the store when you're 13.

[1667] You went to Mottley crew with him.

[1668] My dad's got, that's not, that wouldn't even be a priority for him, I don't think.

[1669] That's awesome.

[1670] That's cool.

[1671] Ah, dude, I'm so excited.

[1672] I wanted to ask, too, like, you know, for all the shit talking, people have to promote the fights, you know.

[1673] But, like, Daniel Cormier and John Jones, no matter who.

[1674] who wins at the end of the fight.

[1675] They're going to shake each other's hand, right?

[1676] I hope so.

[1677] I hope so.

[1678] Is it common, like what we saw with Ronda Rousey, not shaking me shit?

[1679] How do you hit a fucking arm bar somebody?

[1680] They tap out, and then they get up and go to shake your hand, and you won't do it.

[1681] Like that...

[1682] Well, I think that mentality that Rhonda has is like a...

[1683] She's a...

[1684] Like, she's mercenary in there.

[1685] I mean, and it wasn't over when it was over to her.

[1686] For her, it wasn't a competition.

[1687] It was life.

[1688] It was life or death.

[1689] I don't know, man. I mean, that same thing is probably why she's not fighting anymore, you know?

[1690] Like her animosity and her emotions were so riding on that thing.

[1691] And then when she lost, and then when she lost again in devastating fashion, that's also the reason why there was so much backlash.

[1692] Whereas someone who's really loved, like Randy Couture, Randy Cotour would lose a fight and no one talked, I mean, I'm sure someone talked trash about him, but no one's opinion of him differed when he lost because he's such.

[1693] a good guy.

[1694] And because when he won, you know, after the fight, he would always pick the guy up and shake their hand and hug them and he was always a gentleman.

[1695] And when people have that sort of a mentality, you know, like here's a perfect example this past weekend.

[1696] Dustin Poirier and Eddie Alvarez had a fight.

[1697] And the fight was stopped because of an illegal blow that Eddie Alvarez accidentally landed on Dustin Pooree.

[1698] And the crowd was booing Eddie Alvarez.

[1699] And Dustin Poirier yelled at the crowd, don't boo this man. Like, we were in a fight.

[1700] And and he's not a dirty fighter, and he made a mistake.

[1701] And, first of all, Eddie Alvarez's eye was closed.

[1702] He could barely see.

[1703] He was completely on Queer Street.

[1704] He had been almost knocked unconscious, and he hit this dude in the clinch with a couple of knees, and the referee didn't stop him, and he thought they were legal.

[1705] You know, he's in the chaos of a crazy cage fight.

[1706] But to have those two dudes, after the fight, both are bloody and battered.

[1707] Both of them are just, like, exhausted from a war, right?

[1708] and I'm interviewing the both of them side by side and to have Dustin Porrier step in to defend Eddie Alvarez who just need him illegally in the face telling the crowd, don't boo this man. Like he was literally upset.

[1709] And then they shook hands.

[1710] There's something beautiful about that.

[1711] And I think people like the animosity, but they also really like the fact when the animosity is squashed after the fight and people hug it out.

[1712] They really do like that.

[1713] Yeah, and I think that there's a parallel with comedians who don't want to accept other comedians.

[1714] Yeah, I think so, too.

[1715] And then there's you who's just not insecure and wants more fucking comedy.

[1716] Well, I love comedy, you know, and I love comedians.

[1717] There's some comedians that want to be the only person that's funny, and they also bring people that suck with them on the road.

[1718] That's one thing you say.

[1719] I can't stand it with them.

[1720] Oh, that's so common.

[1721] Guys will, they stack the deck.

[1722] They'll bring someone on the road with them that's terrible.

[1723] I try to bring the funniest young guys I can find.

[1724] Ian Edwards.

[1725] Yeah, Ian, and this weekend, Tony and Ian, those guys are national headliners, you know, But I bring both of them on the road with me. And Joey Diaz.

[1726] I had one show in November 2011, and it was my first theater show in L .A. And this was like, I'm going to have everybody that matters to me, like, every, you know.

[1727] And I asked Ian Edwards to open for me. That's awesome.

[1728] And I'm fucking stoked.

[1729] He's an animal.

[1730] I was just so stoked that he even did it.

[1731] And I loved that he's so much better than me. He's a really fucking good guy, too.

[1732] He's another guy that, like, he spent too much time doing other things other than doing stand -up.

[1733] And this is one of the things that I always tell comics.

[1734] Like, you've got to be careful of those honeypot jobs, like, writing for a show.

[1735] Like, a lot of really good comics wind up losing their stand -up careers because they develop a writing career.

[1736] And they, like, Ian should be a national headliner in big theaters all over the world.

[1737] All of the country and all over the world.

[1738] He really should be.

[1739] He's that good.

[1740] But because of the fact that he spent so much time writing on sitcoms, he didn't tour enough and he didn't put out enough material.

[1741] Like, he only has one CD out.

[1742] He's been doing comedy as long as me. Ian Edwards and I started doing comedy together in 1990.

[1743] That's when I met him.

[1744] I met him in 19 -fucking 90 or 91 in New York.

[1745] And I've known him forever.

[1746] That was when I made my first video was 1990.

[1747] Wow.

[1748] Yeah.

[1749] It's a long time, man. Fuck yeah, dude.

[1750] But, yeah, my thoughts are that we should, I mean, if you like, like, everybody gets into comedy because they love it, right?

[1751] That's why you get into it.

[1752] You want to watch, you know, you see a guy like, you know, dice Clay or Kinnison or Pryor or whoever it is that inspired you.

[1753] And you see them, Kevin Hart, you know, name your person.

[1754] You see him, and you want to, you're like, wow, that was awesome.

[1755] I want to see that guy again, you know, and you want to go see comedy.

[1756] And that's why, that's why I got into it, like, to get into it.

[1757] And then all of a sudden to want to be the only one is funny.

[1758] It's crazy to me. It doesn't even make any sense.

[1759] And to not like the other comedians, it's just like you're robbing yourself of inspiration.

[1760] But there's a lot of comics like that.

[1761] They won't watch the other comedians.

[1762] They don't want to see them.

[1763] And when the comics are doing good, they get upset.

[1764] You know, they're like, light them early.

[1765] Light them early.

[1766] Like, I've seen people say that before.

[1767] It's totally a question of being insecure.

[1768] It definitely is.

[1769] It's also, I think it's a famine mindset.

[1770] And the famine mindset is this mindset.

[1771] said like there can only be one like you can only be it can only all come to me it has to all come to me like no one else can but it's no what's that snoop dog song song it's no fun if the homies can't have something but it's true you don't want to be the only one who's doing well that's crazy it's just not a good thinking it's not a good way of thinking rather right and fuck i'm excited for for anaheim oh you're gonna have a good time it's a great card too as it's as it stands right now there's a lot of issues um like getting these cards to actually show like to play out because guys get injured you know where they get disqualified or yeah but i mean when you're getting to yeah they get caught doing something but yeah i watched that and sorry for interrupting that i watched that hurt business documentary on netflix i haven't seen that daniel carmere the fucking like uh with his knee injury and he's trying to get healthy again and yeah fuck that documentary is intense i haven't seen it i should got to watch it It's so incredible, like the way, I mean, almost like the focus of it is, okay, we're going to spotlight like a number of these personalities from the UFC and really show just how fucking tragic it is.

[1772] They put so much into it and then, you know, they had their careers for whatever it's worth.

[1773] And then when it's all of a sudden done, they just got nothing to fucking show for it.

[1774] And it's just so fucking tragic.

[1775] Well, you can't think that you're going to have something to show for it.

[1776] That's the thing.

[1777] If you're lucky and you become a Connor McGregor, who's like one in a million, or you become, you know, a George St. Pierre who retires as the champion, you're really, really unusual.

[1778] But for everyone else, you have to do it because you love doing it.

[1779] Of course.

[1780] And if you do it because you love doing it and that's what you want to do, then you should do it.

[1781] And you will bank a lot of money if you're successful.

[1782] But there's this thing that people have where they see a guy like Floyd Mayweather and they say, well, hey, boxers make millions of dollars.

[1783] Look, Floyd Mayweather made hundreds of millions of dollars.

[1784] No, no, no, no, no. No, Floyd Mayweather makes hundreds of millions of dollars, not boxers.

[1785] Sure, sure.

[1786] Like, Gernati Golovkin, who's one of the best boxers in the world, he can't even sell 200 ,000 payper views.

[1787] Like, his last payper view by, I think, was like, 150 ,000, which is insanely low to the point where, like, it's very difficult for promoters to even get behind him unless he's fighting someone like Canello Alvarez, which is his next fight.

[1788] Well, he'll make some money in that fight, but guarantee you he ain't making very good money, like, with 150 ,000 paperview.

[1789] views, and he's a multiple -time world champion and like an fantastic amateur fighter and one of the best in the world.

[1790] It's about being a star, and a promoter is not responsible to give a fighter a bunch of money if they're not earning a bunch of money.

[1791] It's a business, and the business is people want to pay to see you.

[1792] Why do they want to see you?

[1793] Do they want to see you because you trash talk, or do they want to see you because you're Anderson Silva and you fight like you're in the Matrix?

[1794] Or do they want to see you because you're Ronda Rousey and you're the first ever woman ass kicker that we've ever seen like this.

[1795] Well, whatever reason it is that they want to see you, that reason is why you can make a shit ton of money.

[1796] It's not that you just deserve a shit ton of money because it's hard to do.

[1797] Right.

[1798] And that's where, but a lot of people get that wrong in their head.

[1799] They get that wrong in their head.

[1800] Well, it's show business, but it's also athletics.

[1801] So it's a very bizarre combination of two worlds.

[1802] Do you think that Carter is doing a disservice to himself by putting so much attention on, like just putting his whole UFC career on hold for this Mayweather thing?

[1803] No. Because ultimately he can only fight for so long and he stands to win like who knows how much money.

[1804] I mean he can make it could be as much as a hundred million dollars for the fight.

[1805] It's going to be insane.

[1806] Asking a guy to pass up on the opportunity to make a hundred million dollars is kind of crazy.

[1807] That said, he's fighting you're saying if he wins or what have you loses?

[1808] No, no, no, it doesn't matter.

[1809] It's not.

[1810] The way boxing works is you get a purse, you know?

[1811] Like the way you have F .C. Works is different and often criticized, and I think rightly so, is that you have a win money and a show money.

[1812] So, say if you were going to fight Jamie, and they set it up where you fight, you make $50 ,000 to show, and then another $50 if you win.

[1813] A lot of people have a real hard time with that, and I think they should, because you're doing your best, you're giving your best performance, regardless of whether or not you win.

[1814] No one's going to fight harder, I don't think, at least, to get that win bonus.

[1815] These guys are trying to win.

[1816] They're fucking gladiators.

[1817] You know, I mean, I think you should have a purse, and that should be what you get paid, and you fight your best, and that's what you get paid.

[1818] Like, this idea that you're, that's double is going to, you know, you're going to come your way.

[1819] If you get the judges nod, meanwhile, the judges get shit wrong all the time.

[1820] And to have your future, like, have $50 ,000 or $100 ,000, or who knows what the number is, on the line due to someone else's interpretation of it, or you can get injured and wind up losing, or anything.

[1821] it happened like i think that's kind of fucked up the thing about the connor mcgregor floyd may with a fight if it's tennis you get the money if you win yeah but that's different first of all it's not a fight okay because like you can play a tennis match every weekend try fighting every weekend you'd be dead in a month you know like here it us u .s president yeah they agreed to sign a deal with floydman that doesn't mean anything because floyd mayweather hasn't agreed to it the deal hasn't been negotiated Connor has agreed so that's what that means but here's the deal let's be honest about this as much as possible This is a boxing match between Connor McGregor, a guy who's never had a real professional boxing match, who was a really good amateur boxer in Ireland, who's a real multiple division world champion combat sports fighter, no doubt about that.

[1822] But, and a striker, no doubt about that.

[1823] But he's fighting one of the best boxers, if not the best boxer, ever.

[1824] Most likely, this is not going to work out well for him, if you had a guess.

[1825] That's my honest take on it.

[1826] The only way it could work out well is if Floyd takes him lightly, Connor clips him, Connor mugs him, kind of does some like old school Bernard Hopkins shit, like just ties him up, ruffs him up inside the clinch, hits him with some real hard shots, or does something fucked up to him.

[1827] I mean, who knows?

[1828] Headbots him.

[1829] I mean, that's what Victor Ortiz tried to do to him.

[1830] I guess he can also say that he doesn't really stand there.

[1831] It's a win -win for Connor because if he loses, of course he was going to lose.

[1832] Yeah.

[1833] And also, Floyd is not a vicious puncher.

[1834] He used to be.

[1835] No, he never was.

[1836] You don't think?

[1837] No, no, he never was.

[1838] He is an amazing boxer, but he has very brittle hands.

[1839] He breaks his hands a lot.

[1840] And he can knock you out, like he knocked out Victor Ortiz, but he knocked out Victor Ortiz because he just standing in front of him.

[1841] He knocked out Ricky Hatton, who was a smaller fighter, but he doesn't knock out most guys.

[1842] He stuns them.

[1843] He sticks him with some hard shots, but Conner's got a really good chin and he's a much bigger guy.

[1844] So the odds are, even if Connor gets worked, he's just going to get out boxed for 12 rounds and get embarrassed and just whiff at a bunch of punches and Floyd's not going to be anywhere near him.

[1845] Or he can catch him.

[1846] I mean, it is possible that he can catch him.

[1847] But it's not likely.

[1848] Like, the odds are going to be huge in Floyd made with his favor.

[1849] If I had a guess, it's going to be like 20 to 1 or something crazy like that.

[1850] I'm not an odds maker.

[1851] But I do know movement and I know boxing.

[1852] And just just a big difference between what a guy like Floyd Mayweather can do and a guy like Connor can do when it comes to the actual boxing skills.

[1853] But there's also another factor, too, that Connor has been fighting with small gloves and he's going to be fighting with larger gloves.

[1854] What size gloves do they agree on for the fight?

[1855] If Floyd's smart, he's going to make them fight with 10 ounce gloves, you know, because probably Connor will want to wear eight.

[1856] I don't know what weight class they have the cutoff in.

[1857] like lighter weight classes they use eight -ounce gloves and heavier they use 10 -ounce gloves you know that's like that was a stipulation the Marvin haggler or sugar A Leonard fight the sugar A Leonard wanted the bigger gloves one of the bigger gloves because he's fighting a big heavy puncher like a haggler so they might make some sort of a decision to go with larger gloves but Floyd's a fucking 49 and oh multiple division world boxing champion and conner has never had a professional boxing fight.

[1858] That's really what it is.

[1859] It's interesting.

[1860] I mean, I want to see it.

[1861] Don't make me no mistake about it.

[1862] When the fucking first bell rings, I'll have my popcorn ready, bro.

[1863] Well, you'll probably be right there.

[1864] I don't think so.

[1865] No, I think I'll be home.

[1866] Yeah, I think I'll be watching that from home.

[1867] I think that's whoever does commentary on that, it's going to be probably boxing people.

[1868] It's like if you had Max Kellerman and Jim Lampley doing commentary on Floyd Mayweather fighting Connor McGregor in an MMA fight, I think that would be an embarrassment.

[1869] That would be ridiculous.

[1870] Just as ridiculous as it would be for me to do commentary on Connor fighting Floyd in a boxing match.

[1871] Unless they wanted to have a combination of an MMA judge or an MMA commentator and a boxing commentator.

[1872] Maybe, perhaps.

[1873] I would do it with Max Kellerman.

[1874] I'm a big fan of that guy.

[1875] I like that guy a lot.

[1876] I think that would be kind of interesting.

[1877] But most likely I'll be at home watching it.

[1878] You know, I'd like to see it live maybe.

[1879] I'd maybe sit ringside.

[1880] Maybe kind of interesting.

[1881] See that?

[1882] It's going to be a crazy, interesting experience to see what Connor can do.

[1883] And I know he's been working almost exclusively on his boxing for months and months and months in preparation for this.

[1884] Here's the thing that motherfucker can put you into orbit with one punch.

[1885] That's a fact.

[1886] You know, like if you look at this past weekend, it's a perfect example when I said about Eddie Alvarez and Dustin Poirier having this crazy war, Connor murked both of those guys with one punch.

[1887] with Eddie he softened him up with a few punches before he murked him but he he had him on queer street with one punch and he murked Dustin Poirier with one punch I mean he's just he hits fucking hard this guy Farrasa Hobby is a very famous MMA coach and he said it best he said Connor has the touch of death like he just bach he just fucking he just blaps dudes and zaps them with ridiculous speed and accuracy and when he does you're fucking The question is whether or not he's going to be able to do that to Floyd Motherfucking Mayweather and most likely Floyd's going to be nowhere near him when those punches come flying I mean he's a wizard you ever watch like Floyd Mayweather defensive highlight reel What's just him kind of running backwards no him just moving away from punches bending at the hips He's not a runner see fluid people think of Floyd's a runner Floyd doesn't run he's not like running away from guys He stands right in front of dudes he stands right in front of dudes he stands right in front of dudes and maybe backs up slightly or moves to the side but he's just so knowledgeable when it comes to boxing and he has such a deep understanding of where to be at the right time and where the punches can come from the left comes from here that means the right's coming this way and he's nowhere near that he's over here and that means after the right look at like what can you stand in front of him when you watch him the way he's able to like slide out of the way of shit i mean dudes just don't fucking hit him very often he's been hit least or less than any world champion that's had 49 fights.

[1888] I would say that he probably has the most successful defensive career in the history of boxing.

[1889] He's, I mean, he's literally been tagged hard maybe five, six times at his entire career.

[1890] And he stands in front of some of the best fighters in the world, like Canello Alvarez.

[1891] I mean, Canello was younger then.

[1892] It was a few years ago, and Canello wasn't as good as he is now.

[1893] but he just stands right in front of guys and pops him in the face and just understands how to move.

[1894] Like that kind of shit.

[1895] Like when you're watching this highlight reel, you're watching a master.

[1896] Like young fighters, they should watch his defensive movements and abilities, I think, almost above all others, except now this new guy, Vasily Lomachenko, who I think rivals anybody that's ever lived in terms of his movement, his ability to move and his positioning and footwork.

[1897] I think he's as good as it's ever been.

[1898] But, you know, he has only got, like, nine professional fights or something like that.

[1899] He just hasn't really...

[1900] Look, look at this.

[1901] Oscar Deloio is standing right in front of him and he can't fucking hit him.

[1902] He's throwing all these punches.

[1903] Look at that.

[1904] Mom Wan -M -L.

[1905] Marquez.

[1906] He pops them and just, whoops, slides right out of the way.

[1907] Sorry, not here.

[1908] And unbelievable work ethic.

[1909] Like, Floyd may be able to go to a club, go to a nightclub in Vegas, hang out, drink water, hang out with everybody, get all the accolades.

[1910] Ladies and gentlemen, Floyd, Mother, Mother, Mayweather's in the house.

[1911] Everybody goes crazy, lights some $100 bills.

[1912] Then you know what he does?

[1913] People will drive his Rolls Royce, and he'll run.

[1914] He'll run the Vegas strip, run miles, and then go to the gym, 3 o 'clock in the morning, and do fucking 15 rounds in the heavy bag.

[1915] He's an animal.

[1916] I mean, his work ethic and his mind and his determination and focus, and I guarantee you, man, if he's getting ready for Floyd Mayweather or is getting ready for Connor McGregor, he's going to be in tip -top shape again, man. He's never going to, like, come in slipping.

[1917] It's going to be fun.

[1918] But why has he got to be so...

[1919] Such a dick?

[1920] Yeah.

[1921] Because that's how he made all that money.

[1922] It's because what we were talking about before, like, what it, like...

[1923] The show business.

[1924] The show business aspect of it is having people.

[1925] Like, he used to be pretty boy Floyd Mayweather.

[1926] That's what they used to call him.

[1927] But it wasn't really making any money.

[1928] You know, he became rich when he became Floyd Money Mayweather.

[1929] When he started talking all this shit, and then people wanted him to get his ass kicked.

[1930] And he wasn't getting his ass kicked.

[1931] Like, people are paying to see him not.

[1932] necessarily because they like him.

[1933] They're paying to see him because they want to see him get fucked up because he's a huge star.

[1934] And it became a huge star by fucking with people, talking a lot of shit, talking about how great he is, showing all of his watches and all of his jewelry, and he's got this crazy house in Vegas.

[1935] And, you know, I mean, it's really the controversy, like domestic violence.

[1936] Dude went to jail for beating up girls.

[1937] You know, like, there's a lot of controversy involved in him.

[1938] And that's one of the reasons why people wanted to see him fight.

[1939] They wanted to see him lose.

[1940] Uh -huh.

[1941] And he didn't lose.

[1942] He went all the way to the bank.

[1943] I mean, he tied Rocky Marciano's record for having the most successful fights ever.

[1944] 49 and 0 as a champion.

[1945] It's unheard of.

[1946] Unheard of.

[1947] And Rocky Marciano's record is a little bullshit.

[1948] Because Rocky Marciano, Italians right now are going crazy.

[1949] What the fuck are you saying?

[1950] Rocky's the best!

[1951] It's pretty much agreed that Rocky Marciano fought his brother in at least one fight early in his career.

[1952] So it was like a fake fight He could pull that up See if you've that's been That's been validated I'm pretty sure I've read that That Rocky Marciano had like a fixed fight With his brother Like back in the day You know like a guy like Rocky Marciano was a murderous puncher It's probably like he would show up for a fight And people didn't want to fight him And like the people had paid to see him like What are going to do?

[1953] Like yeah my brother will get in there So his brother gets in there and goes down to a body shot or something I don't know I don't know how played out but we're lucky we're not in that business dude you think you have brain damage right you know from tim kennedy dropping you on your head how about just getting thudded in the head by some of the best fighters in the world i think i'm in pretty good shape with all that you seem fine yeah thanks look anthony rumble johnson who's one of the best fighters in the world just retired and he did an interview recently and uh today the interview came out we said brain damage is a big concern.

[1954] He's a guy who gives everybody brain damage.

[1955] Have you ever see rumble fight?

[1956] The most terrifying knockout artist in MMA in my opinion.

[1957] And he retired because he's worried about someone doing that to him.

[1958] He's like, I don't, I don't want brain damage.

[1959] He's like, I want other things in my life.

[1960] It's also interesting because he's one of the best fighters in the world.

[1961] And he said, I'm not really a fighter.

[1962] He goes, I'm an athlete who's really good at fighting, which I thought was fascinating, because it shows so much awareness.

[1963] It shows what a smart guy he is, that he's really kind of aware of who he is.

[1964] Fuck yeah, dude.

[1965] So Anaheim, you're there.

[1966] I'm down so psyched.

[1967] It's a good one, too.

[1968] I hope nobody fucks up before the fight.

[1969] They almost got in a brawl this past weekend.

[1970] You should check out that show, the doctor, the herd business?

[1971] This past weekend, Daniel Cormier hit John Jones in the face with a water bottle at a press conference.

[1972] I saw that on TMZ.

[1973] And John tried to chuck one at him, and they almost brawled.

[1974] What's up with the water bottles at the press conferences?

[1975] Well, now they drain the monster energy cans.

[1976] So when you see those monster energy drinks that are sitting there on the dais, those are fake.

[1977] They're real monster energy drinks, but they have to drink them all or empty them out before they get up there.

[1978] Right.

[1979] It's so exciting.

[1980] Oh, it's so exciting.

[1981] And just this John Jones, that is so interesting that press conference where John Jones is talking all positive, like, no, I want to show that you can get back on your feet and, you know, and then Cormier says, wait, hold on a second.

[1982] And backstage, you told me I'm the biggest pussy you ever saw.

[1983] Yeah.

[1984] And then they'd...

[1985] Yeah.

[1986] That was fascinating the way that played out.

[1987] Well, John's starting to come clean now.

[1988] Trying to be more of himself.

[1989] This past weekend, they had a press conference.

[1990] And he said that he was fucking doing cocaine all weekend long before he beat him.

[1991] Well, Daniel Kormier said, Daniel was talking all this shit.

[1992] Is this fight even going to happen?

[1993] Who knows if John gets caught doing cocaine or sandblasting a prostitute?

[1994] What is sandblasting or prostitute?

[1995] I don't know, but it's hilarious.

[1996] It's a hilarious term.

[1997] Daniel's funny, man. I did commentary with him this past weekend.

[1998] Right, I saw that too.

[1999] He's a funny fucking dude, man. I saw that on your IG story.

[2000] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[2001] And so anyway, when John said that, I beat you after I did cocaine for a weekend.

[2002] Everybody's like, oh shit.

[2003] It's like, I like that John is being himself.

[2004] That'll serve him better than all this fake shit.

[2005] Right, it's fake like, I'm just a good guy.

[2006] I want to be uplifting.

[2007] Yeah.

[2008] Well, he does want to be uplifting.

[2009] But when it comes to, like, actual fighting, he's a fucking straight -up killer.

[2010] John Jones is a killer.

[2011] That's, I mean, you don't get to be the youngest ever UFC champion if you're not a killer.

[2012] He got, he showed up.

[2013] He fought Mauricio Shogun Huah in his UFC title fight, who is like a legend in Brazil.

[2014] His opening move was a flying knee.

[2015] He threw a flying knee on Maricio Shogun Hua.

[2016] That is just crazy.

[2017] I mean, you have to be such a gangster to even.

[2018] And think about doing that to a guy like, you're not feeling him out.

[2019] He just leaped in and threw a fucking flying knee at Shogun's face and caught him and beat his ass and stopped him when he was like 22, won the world title.

[2020] It was bananas.

[2021] You know, John was something special and still is.

[2022] But it's going to, you know, it's going to be a long, a tough fight with him and Cormier this time, I think.

[2023] It's going to be fun.

[2024] I can't wait, dude.

[2025] You're going to be there.

[2026] I can't wait.

[2027] Yeah, I just hope the card doesn't fall apart.

[2028] You know, cards fall apart.

[2029] It's so hard to get through a camp.

[2030] without getting injured.

[2031] Like, we're in danger of losing T .J. Dillishaw versus Cody Garbrandt for the Bannamway title.

[2032] Cody Garbrant.

[2033] Cody Garbrant right now is in Germany, getting some shit done to his back.

[2034] He's getting Regenicine done on his back to deal with a bulging dish that's been bothering.

[2035] After that last fight, I followed him on Twitter.

[2036] And then he followed me back.

[2037] Oh, that's cool.

[2038] That's dope.

[2039] Such a strikingly handsome guy.

[2040] He's very handsome, beautiful, man. Bad motherfucker, too.

[2041] That was a great, that was the best fighter that night.

[2042] Dominic Cruz, him and Dominic Cruz.

[2043] Yeah.

[2044] Well, not only that, but I mean, he's fighting a guy who was consensus top two or three pound -for -pound fighter in the world in Dominicruz.

[2045] And he still lit him up.

[2046] Yeah.

[2047] That's a big fight.

[2048] And the bravado.

[2049] Mm -hmm.

[2050] Oh, yeah.

[2051] He was break dancing and shit, improvising after he dropped him and knocked him down.

[2052] He was like posing.

[2053] Right.

[2054] He could have finished him, but he was too busy dancing.

[2055] I don't know about that.

[2056] I mean, if he thought he could have finished him, he would have tried to finish him.

[2057] He realized that Dom was hurt and stunned.

[2058] You want to humiliate him.

[2059] He wanted to fuck with his head because Dominic Cruz's whole game, a big part of it was getting inside your head.

[2060] But he fuck with the wrong guy because Cody grew up getting fucked with.

[2061] So like, you start fucking with him.

[2062] He's like, oh, I'm home here.

[2063] Like, I like fucking with people.

[2064] Come on, fuck with me. I'll fuck with you.

[2065] Like, if you want to be, like, reasonable and respectful, he'll be respectful.

[2066] Cody will be respectful.

[2067] But if you want to talk shit to him, oh, he's a black.

[2068] belt and talking shit.

[2069] So it's like Dominic Cruz just kind of bit off more than he could chew when it came to the shit talking and really fired Cody up.

[2070] So when Cody dropped him and then started posing him, like then Dominic has to kind of get it back and he couldn't get it back.

[2071] So he got kind of a little bit out of his, you know, his comfort level.

[2072] It's, it's a fascinating aspect of fighting, the trash talking and the mental warfare.

[2073] Yeah.

[2074] You know, there's a lot to it.

[2075] Don't never do that, dude.

[2076] Don't never let anybody talk to you into doing that.

[2077] I know Johnny Knoxville, he did that boxing match with butter bean that was so hard to watch it was terrible how bad was he fucked up after that fight uh that's not the worst for knoxville what is he doing these days right now he's filming a movie in south africa based on a true story about an amusement park in new jersey called action park which was notoriously the most dangerous uh amusement park like lots of people died on their rides.

[2078] Everybody that worked there was intoxicated and fucked up while they were working and they called it class action park.

[2079] And so he's making a comedy movie about the guy who ran that park and it's set in New Jersey but they're filming it in South Africa.

[2080] They're filming a lot of shit in South Africa.

[2081] It's so cheap to film in South Africa.

[2082] So they're building a whole fucking thing.

[2083] Russell Peters just got back from South Africa.

[2084] He was filming a new show for Netflix called The Indian Detective and he's filming it in South Africa.

[2085] He's filming it in South I think for the same reasons.

[2086] They just film a lot of stuff in South Africa now because of that?

[2087] So cheap there.

[2088] Really?

[2089] Yeah.

[2090] I remember being there.

[2091] When we went out there for Wild Boys.

[2092] Is it dangerous?

[2093] Johannesburg is the carjacking capital of the world.

[2094] Whoa.

[2095] Which we thought was hilarious.

[2096] We were jacking off in cars the whole time.

[2097] Carjacking capital of the world.

[2098] I thought it was Cam Jo, New Jersey.

[2099] Wasn't there like a movie on that, like drive?

[2100] Wasn't there a movie about carjacking in Camden?

[2101] I feel like Camden, New Jersey.

[2102] But what do they say?

[2103] Cape Town is a first world city and a third world country, I think, is how they just...

[2104] Oh, that makes sense.

[2105] And Johannesburg is more...

[2106] Johannesburg, I think, is a little gnarlier.

[2107] It's more kind of Lebanon kind of deal.

[2108] Oh, yeah?

[2109] I mean, I don't know.

[2110] That was the impression I got.

[2111] It was creepier.

[2112] I want to go to Africa, but I'm scared of malaria.

[2113] That's so funny.

[2114] I used to dump out my malaria pills and fill up the bottle with Xanax.

[2115] What?

[2116] Yeah.

[2117] You weren't worried about malaria?

[2118] No, because the malaria pills gave you, like, terrible nightmares.

[2119] Yeah, I heard.

[2120] You get crazy hallucinations.

[2121] Yeah, like I didn't like the experience the malaria pills.

[2122] What did it do for you?

[2123] Gave you nightmares?

[2124] Yeah, gave me fucked up nightmares, if I remember right.

[2125] I didn't, and I was like, oh, well, I can bring tons of pills and just put them in the wrong bottle.

[2126] And if you get malaria, then what?

[2127] Oh, I don't know.

[2128] That was another thing, man, that when I was a kid at the American school in London, like in eighth grade, we went on a field trip to Egypt.

[2129] And they told us, they said, don't fucking drink the water.

[2130] Don't, like, even if you order a soda, don't let them give you ice cubes to pour because you'll get so sick from the water.

[2131] and we took it seriously but then we were eating outside this restaurant on the River Nile here's this Egyptian dude and fucking watched him dunk a toothbrush in the river Nile he's sitting there brushing his teeth and I was thinking well if the fucking tap water is so bad then what's the River Nile is gotta be insane but I remember and I was 13 and I thought well fuck if that guy came if that guy went to America if that guy went to England the toothbrush dude he'd probably get sick drinking the water where I live.

[2132] I mean, I don't know.

[2133] It's like whatever you're exposed to you.

[2134] This guy's built up his immune system.

[2135] He can do that.

[2136] Right.

[2137] And I remember thinking, so probably the best thing you could do would be to travel the whole world and drink fucking tap water like crazy everywhere you go.

[2138] That'd be the way to build up your immune system.

[2139] And then ultimately that's what we did.

[2140] Wild Boys, we went to fucking every goddamn continent except Antarctica.

[2141] And I drank, the first thing I did it, from the airport, I'd check in the hotel room, and I would put down my bag and I'd fucking brush my teeth.

[2142] You know, you brush your teeth and you can rinse it out and then you'd think, and I'd be able to put my head under the tap and just gulp, gop, go up and drink a ton of tap water.

[2143] I did that all over Africa, fucking Asia, South America, everywhere.

[2144] I fucking drank tap water like a motherfucker.

[2145] Did you get sick?

[2146] I had a little bit of diarrhea in Kenya.

[2147] But I don't think that that was that big of a deal.

[2148] And I think that my theory was, was, was, uh, I think I think I like how you experiment on yourself yeah it's not like you brought somebody with you Mike drink the water right no dude like that's why I don't understand germaphobs and shit like that oh that's crazy like uh yeah you live in an incubator that's how you get sick you know you want to like uh right I don't get nervous about shaking people's hands or shit like that fuck that that's keeping your immune system on its toes yeah no I'll of course of a weekend I'll shake hundreds of people's hands sure you know at a comedy show you show, especially if I have a meet and greet after the show, which I didn't do in Dallas this past weekend, but for people that are asking, I can't, I can't.

[2149] The size of that crowd is fucking unbelievable.

[2150] Six thousand people.

[2151] I can't do it.

[2152] Congratulations.

[2153] Thanks, man. That was fucking cool.

[2154] Thank you.

[2155] It was fun.

[2156] I saw this morning on your tour.

[2157] God, I'm jealous of your tour schedule to go like three days and then I'm home for it.

[2158] That's how I do it.

[2159] I can't do it.

[2160] I have kids, you know, I don't want to do it any other way.

[2161] I do two days out, come back.

[2162] Burt Kreischer's schedule Oh he's crazy He's fucking hilarious Well Burke Kreischer would go and do things on the road For months at a time You know?

[2163] I mean not much I for like the entire fucking year Yeah You guys never home Well for his television show was real bad But he's not doing that television show anymore Which I think is great because it allows him to concentrate on his stand -up Which is another thing that's like that was kind of his honeypot Was the his travel channel show Whereas it was kind of taken away from his stand -up But now a stand -up is blown up because he's really focusing on it, and he's doing it a lot, touring a lot, and now people are getting a chance.

[2164] And it's tighter, too.

[2165] Like, you see him on stage.

[2166] It's fucking super tight because he's performing a lot.

[2167] Whereas he would go a long time without performing because he'd be, you know, doing all this crazy shit on the road.

[2168] Right.

[2169] Which he enjoyed, you know.

[2170] I love him, too.

[2171] Like, I did his podcast, and we had a blast, and he really encouraged me. He's like, ah, man, go to the store, go to the store.

[2172] And I've been going to the store a lot.

[2173] And he encouraged me to do that.

[2174] That's awesome.

[2175] I just think it's funny how you say that his stand -up suffered because of the travel channel show.

[2176] But now he's on the road, like, every day out of the year.

[2177] It's like, where does his family fit in?

[2178] Well, he's not really.

[2179] I mean, he's home during the weekdays a lot.

[2180] It's weekends.

[2181] Well, yeah, but he's on the comedy club grind.

[2182] So that means you...

[2183] But this at night.

[2184] The way it works with me, my kids are asleep by the time I leave the house.

[2185] Because my sets at the comedy store are always like 10, 15.

[2186] I put my kids to bed at 8, and then I'll go over my...

[2187] material real quick and head out the door and then you know it's like I have another life you know I have the nighttime life it's it's doable it's doable but the travel's a fucking grind man it's just it's so narly it's so bad for your body I'm not touring as much as I did the last few now I'm like week on week off you know yeah week on week off week off is a way to do it two weekends out of the month is enough it's more than enough because like if I come home like yesterday I was wrecked when I come home just just for the weekend of traveling and then the flight and it's not a fucking long flight Dallas is only like two and a half hours or something it's nothing but you get home and you're like oh you just it's so dragging but what you got to do is work out that's the key when you get home from something like that go on a hike do something to get your metabolism pumped up and then you'll feel normal but it's the only way to feel normal if you feel jet lagged a lot of people just like to lay around do nothing right you can't do that you got to you got to kickstart your body just got to blow out all the carbon yeah can meditate too that'll help too that'll help too don't you worry about people fucking with you stevo I know dude thanks for setting me straight like that no problem now I feel I got I find myself and say what the fuck did I talk about hookers so much you didn't I know what I mean whatever the hooker stories were so fucking ancient I don't care it's just that I have a girlfriend now and you know I'm really she's just a wonderful wonderful person and I'd hate for hard to feel bad i'd hate for her to have me negatively impacted i'm not saying anything who cares right i told some old hooker stories right you know like who cares you're just sensitive but then um yeah i'm the same reason why you like to snuggle you're a good guy i really want to be good to my girl you know and i really i really uh care about being good to my girl so so that's kind of in my head and then um and i'm like why the fuck you know i'm like oh i don't want to lynch al -madrigal but then kind of fucking you know i mean i told the story objectively like of what happened and and i do like want to just i just want to say don't fucking be a dick to al magical he's a good guy he just he gets in his own way with that stuff you know he gets in his own way but god he's a fucking talented guy watch his special he's a great guy give him give him love and uh al and i have been friends since he first started doing stand -up i worked with him in in the late 90s at cobs in san francisco if anybody's listening and they're like you know maybe just throw throw out a tweet and say hey, fucking Steveo sends his love.

[2188] Sends his love.

[2189] I really do.

[2190] I genuinely fucking do.

[2191] Good for you, dude.

[2192] Good for you.

[2193] Fucking hey.

[2194] Where can people see you?

[2195] They want to go see you.

[2196] Shit, my next gig is in Salt Lake City Wise guys.

[2197] Oh, that's a great club.

[2198] I wonder if, it's going to be my sixth time there.

[2199] I love it.

[2200] If I'm in the one of the Green Valley, is it called?

[2201] I don't know which one.

[2202] I'm in one.

[2203] I don't know which one of them out either.

[2204] I'm there in July.

[2205] Salt Lake City.

[2206] I love that fucking.

[2207] Salt Lake City is a great fucking place.

[2208] People have it all goofy in their head.

[2209] Salt Lake City.

[2210] Salt Lake City.

[2211] Well, they have it in their head that Salt Lake City is like stuck up Mormons.

[2212] But the people that come out to the comedy clubs are the people that are tired of the Mormons.

[2213] Sure.

[2214] They're fun.

[2215] Or the people that are Mormons that could take a joke.

[2216] I've done so phenomenally well there.

[2217] I mean, I really think I've been there five times.

[2218] And I think I'm going back for my sixth time.

[2219] Joey Diaz is the first person to tell me. He's like, Joe Rogan, you got to get down that fucking Salt Lake City.

[2220] Because those motherfuckers are starving.

[2221] They're starving for comedy.

[2222] I love it.

[2223] Yeah, I love it.

[2224] And what the fuck else?

[2225] After that, I'm not even...

[2226] I can't.

[2227] Everything's at stevo .com.

[2228] Steveau .com.

[2229] Yeah.

[2230] I'm excited.

[2231] I'm filming a cameo for this movie on Netflix called Game Over Man. What is it?

[2232] I don't know, but I think Seth Rogen producing it.

[2233] Oh, cool.

[2234] It's Netflix original movies.

[2235] Isn't it interesting that Netflix is doing all these original movies now, too?

[2236] Like, you keep seeing all these original movies?

[2237] Where the fuck are they coming up?

[2238] I was talking to Blow Bros. about how they're giving away so much millions of dollars to comedians for...

[2239] It's great.

[2240] Bill Burr was cracking up.

[2241] He's like, what are a good time to get into comedy?

[2242] Yeah, it is.

[2243] It's a very good time.

[2244] Right, yeah.

[2245] All right.

[2246] Well, thanks, brother.

[2247] Thanks for another fun podcast.

[2248] I appreciate you greatly.

[2249] I appreciate you too, brother.

[2250] Well, fucking thank you, dude.

[2251] All right, we'll be back tomorrow with Graham Hancock, Michael Shermer, and Randall Carlson.

[2252] It's the big epic debate about asteroidal impacts and the end of the ice age and all that crazy shit should be a lot of fun.

[2253] That's tomorrow 1 .30 p .m. Pacific.

[2254] See ya.