#1005 - Hannibal Buress

[0] Yep Hello Hannibal What's up man How are you sir I'm good Good to see you Good to see you too You have notes Yeah I wanted to I had notes I just wanted to Be prepared I had I've had notes Other times But I just didn't have them Written down You know what I mean Oh you had like in your head I had them in my head But I'm an older man now Is your mind starting to slip away Mine starting to slip away So I had some notes You drink it alpha brain And you got notes Yeah Dude you're ready what's the notes what do you want to talk about what's going on oh we we don't have to get right it too let's get into it's ridden down naturally it was just more for like you know sometimes if stuff lag or something or if i feel like if i feel like i don't have something right right and then i'll like peek at it real quick right okay right now we're fresh oh we're fresh good to see you too man yeah sorry about monday oh no worries man yeah shit happens i just Did not.

[1] I was still in New York.

[2] I had booked my flight in the morning, and I just could not go.

[3] You just couldn't do it?

[4] Why?

[5] You were too tired?

[6] It wasn't just a tight.

[7] It was just more of a...

[8] Just didn't feel like going?

[9] Yeah, it was just a, like, to, it was the five -hour thing.

[10] And I did it today, actually.

[11] I flew in today.

[12] But it was just that...

[13] Sometimes you just don't want to do it.

[14] It was just that flight.

[15] I was like, oh, I don't know if I could.

[16] That's the beautiful thing about being a young, successful, single man you could do whatever the fuck you want to do it was uh yeah yeah but i'm uh excited to be back got weird got weird last time oh here yeah the last time was the sam harris one right that's been a year oh yeah that's right yeah that did get a little weird hey alcohol alcohol is a motherfucker it's amazing it's legal it is it's amazing it's like well also it was just uh yeah i should of uh i should have went to the comedy store which i still did do yeah did a terrible set did you well we got a terrible set we did a podcast and got drunk and then you hung around for the second podcast yeah well you said sit in and i was like yeah sure sit in yeah it was sam harrison who else was it it was uh the guy whose podcast it is oh josh zeps he fucking loved it Of course it got a crazy buzz Yeah he loved the controversy But you could see it was kind of gross Even though I loved Josh You could see it while it was going on They loved it He was yes yes yes He enjoyed it Well you were teasing it out too Because I started getting messages What is this crazy?

[17] Hannibal Duh Sam Harris And so I'm like What the fuck is going on?

[18] Because I knew once I left I was like yeah that's gonna be some weird shit And then I was fine with it But then I kept on getting messages Like what is this When is that coming out Everybody saw it live didn't they No, they didn't.

[19] No, they didn't.

[20] That's right.

[21] That's right, because it was Josh Zep's podcast.

[22] It wasn't mine.

[23] Oh, that's right.

[24] Fun times.

[25] Yeah.

[26] It was a fun time.

[27] Well, last time Zeps was here, he was talking about killing babies.

[28] Really?

[29] Remember that?

[30] Yeah, he was talking about, like, maybe you should be able to abort a baby six months after it's born.

[31] I was like, what the fuck are you talking about, man?

[32] See, did he have notes?

[33] No, no notes.

[34] See, that's what happened.

[35] He wasn't prepared.

[36] When you don't have no notes, you're like, yeah, let's kill alive babies.

[37] Right?

[38] Let's talk about it.

[39] Gay dudes feel very differently about babies.

[40] Like, they can't make them, as long as they're doing only gay things.

[41] There's no babies being made, so they're, like, so detached from the idea of a baby.

[42] Do you think that's...

[43] You think that's what he's like, you kill them?

[44] No, I don't.

[45] No. I'm just talking shit.

[46] Wait, did he have strong points?

[47] No. Oh, they were terrible.

[48] Straight up killed a six -month -old baby?

[49] He was just being controversial.

[50] Okay.

[51] You know?

[52] I think he enjoys controversy.

[53] Yeah.

[54] Yeah, clickbait.

[55] Hey, if you're not a comedian, that's a good way to get attention.

[56] Yeah, get a clickbait.

[57] What else do you have?

[58] You know, I mean, everybody can have a good point.

[59] Right.

[60] You know?

[61] But can you yell about it?

[62] Well, if, yeah.

[63] Can you make a meme about it?

[64] I mean, we're, our whole society, like our news runs on clickbait now.

[65] It's getting more and more slippery, you know?

[66] Me and my friends, we call everything fake news now.

[67] Call each other fake news.

[68] Like, I'm going back and forth with Ari and Bert and Tom Segura.

[69] because they wrote some article about Burt Kreischer, and Burt is going to swear off a booze for 90 days.

[70] Yeah.

[71] This is the new bet.

[72] He's going to run a marathon and swear off booze for 90 days.

[73] Okay.

[74] I don't believe it.

[75] Where is he at now?

[76] Has he started yet?

[77] No, he gets drunk every day.

[78] That's what the point.

[79] I'm like, you're going to die like Amy Winehouse.

[80] That's how Amy Winehouse died.

[81] You told him that?

[82] Yeah, that's what I said.

[83] Oh, man, that's rough.

[84] You can't, you got to be like.

[85] No, you got to be honest with your friends.

[86] That hard, like, you're going to die like Amy Winehouse?

[87] I said if you just go cold turkey.

[88] I told them to lay off.

[89] I go, you got to wean off the booze.

[90] No, that's heroin.

[91] You die like that.

[92] No, no, no, no, no, no. Heroin, you just get the shakes and you feel like shit.

[93] But heroin, you can live.

[94] Booze is one of the rare drugs that will kill you if you drop it cold turkey if you're an alcoholic.

[95] But do you think, I think there's a difference between heavy drinker and alcoholics?

[96] Oh, well, yeah, casual boozer.

[97] you know like if you booze like maybe if you have like two or three drinks at night and then you quit cold turkey you'll be fine but if you're one of those all day drinkers yeah and then you quit cold turkey you will die it's very common it's a it's one of the more common drugs that you die i think there's um there's uh like benzos those uh those will kill you from withdrawal there's a few different pharmaceuticals that'll kill you from withdrawal but i don't believe heroin's on that list i think it's very rare that people die from heroin withdrawal What?

[98] Yeah, they get really sick.

[99] Oh, yeah.

[100] You know what Carl Hart is, Dr. Carl Hart?

[101] No. The famous doctor who is...

[102] But I trust all doctors with just two syllables in their full name.

[103] Well, he's got dreadlocks.

[104] He trusted him even more.

[105] He's cool.

[106] But he's a very, very interesting doctor because he talks about, like, drug use and drug with...

[107] He's like, first of all, one of the things that he points out, it was like, I'll just talk about a drug -free society.

[108] He's like, there's never been one.

[109] He goes, there's never been one.

[110] There's never been a drug for you, and you don't know what you want it.

[111] He goes, when it comes to, whether it's caffeine or alcohol and then pharmaceutical drugs, things that help people.

[112] He's like, we have this, like, we decide to demonize certain drugs.

[113] Yeah.

[114] And he's like, the drugs you've got to be worried about, like alcohol is one of the scariest ones.

[115] Because if you quit cold turkey, if you're a hardcore drinker and you're drinking all the time, you'll fucking die.

[116] Well, maybe cough syrup to win yourself off or something like that, something like.

[117] I don't think it helps.

[118] I don't think it activates the same part of your brain.

[119] You know, I was talking to this photographer.

[120] I was at this festival this weekend, and she had a film camera, you know.

[121] Do you develop your own film?

[122] She's, oh, no, you can only develop black and white because if you develop your own color pictures, the fumes, well, it'll knock you right out.

[123] And so I said, so just a little bit of that would be a great time.

[124] It's just a small So just get a little bit of that And you can just Huff and paint Yeah you can do a goddamn job interview And nail it Maybe Just a little bit A smidge it Just like crack a vial in front of your nose Like a micro dose of a little bit of that Have you ever tried poppers?

[125] Do you know what poppers are?

[126] Those are those things that they crack them And they sniff it A male nitrate I think it's called No I did whippers in college Oh yeah I did that when I worked at a creamery I worked at Newport Creamery.

[127] It was like an ice cream place.

[128] And they had the ice cream, those big vats of that.

[129] What is the gas?

[130] Nitrous oxide?

[131] Nitrous oxide, right?

[132] That's what it is, yeah.

[133] And we would do, like, socks off of it.

[134] That kills a lot of brains cells.

[135] A lot.

[136] That kills a lot of brains cells.

[137] I remember I did it one weekend in college, and then I think I did on a Friday night.

[138] And on the Sunday, I was just walking on like, blah, I was just yelling all weird.

[139] I don't know if I was four.

[140] forcing to yell just because I was trying to justify how I felt or if it was a natural yell, but yelling was happening.

[141] Wow.

[142] Yeah.

[143] And you couldn't help it?

[144] I don't know.

[145] You know, sometimes, you ever just tweak out by yourself just to, you never just, you never just, you never just, you never just, you never just, you never, you're, after like a crazy workout, you're like, la, la, la, la, man. Yeah.

[146] I have to work out.

[147] Well, people just tweak out.

[148] Just like, like, like, he did like a flex.

[149] Like Connor at the way in was just tweaking out.

[150] But it was for show.

[151] It was for show.

[152] Sometimes you put a show for yourself.

[153] Right.

[154] Change your state of mind.

[155] Just by yourself.

[156] Yeah, like people say if you smile, it'll change your mind, right?

[157] It'll change the way your brain actually feels.

[158] Well, if you freak out, it probably does that too, right?

[159] Yeah.

[160] Yeah.

[161] There's ways to do it.

[162] I mean, why else would Indians, like Native Americans, when they do those battle cries, why else are they doing that?

[163] They're getting fired up.

[164] Yeah, you get hyped up by yelling or singing a song.

[165] Viking.

[166] Yeah, the Haka.

[167] Is that a Nuzzi?

[168] New Zealand?

[169] Yeah.

[170] Yeah.

[171] It is New Zealand, isn't it?

[172] Yeah.

[173] Well, they were playing, it's this video of them playing the USA team.

[174] Oh, yeah.

[175] And they're doing this elaborate thing.

[176] They're doing it.

[177] It's very elaborate and just energetic.

[178] And they cut to the USA team and they're kind of looking back, kind of just not confused, but just what's going on.

[179] And they went through this whole thing is this right here.

[180] Yeah.

[181] And they did it in a basketball game?

[182] Yeah, the basketball game.

[183] Give me some volume.

[184] This is ridiculous.

[185] You're playing basketball.

[186] And it's like, yo, y 'all about to get dusted by 45 points.

[187] Yeah, what?

[188] You're playing NBA superstars, you fucking dummies.

[189] But it's just for the coach.

[190] It's for the, I mean, that's what they do all the time.

[191] But it's just, it seems so stupid.

[192] That's, well.

[193] It seems stupid.

[194] If you.

[195] If you play a basketball, stupid.

[196] No, I think if you...

[197] It's a performance art. Like, the other players clapped.

[198] The Americans clapped.

[199] They're like, good job, children.

[200] That was...

[201] And then that game, what was the final score of that game?

[202] $100 million to zero.

[203] Is that what it was?

[204] It's just weird if you do all of that and then...

[205] You're ass kicked.

[206] Get...

[207] You get stomped.

[208] Yeah, that is one of the most unfair things ever that they're like NBA superstars playing the Olympics.

[209] That is so fucked up.

[210] It was in our country.

[211] From our country.

[212] But it's so fucked up.

[213] It's so fucked up.

[214] It's like, like, Andre Ward was an Olympic gold medalist, but if you let him boxing the Olympics right now, it would be so fucked up.

[215] It's just wrong.

[216] Well, because the...

[217] It's just way better now.

[218] The boxing Olympics, they...

[219] They don't let professionals.

[220] Is it an age cap to it, or is it just...

[221] No. No, it's just...

[222] I don't think they allow professionals.

[223] Although, that whole professional, non -professional thing is very, very weird now, especially now that they let NBA players play.

[224] You know, because, like, there was always talk of that.

[225] Like, when they were talking about doing that, like, it was back when Mike Tyson was a champ.

[226] They were like, well, what the fuck?

[227] What if you let Mike Tyson box the Olympics?

[228] Good luck.

[229] Well, the players from the other teams are pros, too.

[230] Yeah, I mean, the other countries.

[231] Well, Spain has some solid players, and some of them are NBA players.

[232] Paul Gasol, Marcosal, Rudy Gonzalez, a couple other players that played in the NBA.

[233] Australia actually put up a decent team that got Boget Maybe Patty Mills I might be fucking out But they have a handful of pros from other countries And in those pro leagues that have been competitive against the But not those guys But if there's pros and then there's American pros It's a joke When it comes to basketball there's no competition It's kind of a joke isn't it It's getting close It was for a second for a little bit It's getting close Spain Spain has some guys.

[234] And Spain has a bunch of guys in the league.

[235] So when Spain plays the USA, it's basically like some NBA players playing against other NBA players.

[236] You know what I mean?

[237] Versus random dudes instead of it being random dudes from Spain.

[238] It's actually, you know, they might be playing.

[239] And one of the guys on USA might be playing against one of their real NBA teammates.

[240] Interesting.

[241] Yeah.

[242] The rules are a little different, too, in international basketball.

[243] What's the difference?

[244] For instance, you can goaltend, but once the ball hits the rim, you can swat it off in the NBA.

[245] And all -American basketball, pretty much, you can't even touch the ball if it's anywhere close to the rim or above it.

[246] So it's like a, that's a whole extra rule if you're like if you're seven foot tall, you can just snatch the ball every time it gets near the rim, basically.

[247] There's a couple other little small ones that you're like bumping and shit.

[248] It's interesting how other countries used to be a non -competitive in certain, like boxing is a perfect example.

[249] For the longest time, like the American.

[250] American boxers were head and shoulders above the rest of the world.

[251] Did it?

[252] Yeah, like, especially, like, in the heavyweight division.

[253] It, like, wasn't even close.

[254] There was Henry Cooper who hurt Muhammad Ali real bad.

[255] That was a, of interesting story.

[256] This is back when Muhammad Ali was still cashed his clay before he became Muhammad Ali.

[257] And Henry Cooper was, like, the big English heavyweight.

[258] And he rocked Muhammad Ali with a left hook.

[259] And you know what Angelo Dundee did?

[260] He cut Muhammad Ali's gloves.

[261] He went back to the corner, and he just sliced his gloves.

[262] He's like, hey, we've got to change these gloves.

[263] His gloves are fucked up.

[264] So they bought them all this time.

[265] They had to undo the tape.

[266] Oh, dude.

[267] Oh, shit.

[268] Yeah, they had to undo the tape, get another pair of gloves.

[269] Like, they cut his fucking gloves.

[270] Because that's the type of tricks you could do in the 60s.

[271] Yeah.

[272] Yeah, exactly.

[273] Yeah, that's what they did.

[274] But if you ever see the fight, he got cracked, like more than he ever got cracked in his entire career.

[275] Google Henry Cooper rocks Muhammad Ali.

[276] And so Muhammad Ali It wasn't Muhammad Ali It was Cassius Clay back then So he drops him with like the perfect left hook That was his big punch too And Ali just crashes down to his ass And he's like out And they gave him all sorts of time He went back to the corner They cut the gloves They took the gloves off Then he went back and Got new gloves?

[277] They had to They slice his gloves open Would have razor plate They just sliced them So this is about 10 minutes This is a lot of time A lot of time A lot of time Because they had to get gloves You know They don't have gloves Just waiting What was I wonder what the commentator's Stahl game was like Back there See it right here What these guys used to stalling Like that?

[278] It's right here Boom Ooh Yeah like he is Fucking out And he is Rocked And it's the very end of the round The very end of the round So they sit him down Boom I mean that was a perfect left hook He just got sat down He's in deep trouble Yeah So there's two things happened one it's the end of the round see he's like really out of it here like see it yeah they're throwing water on them and then when they go back they're like oh you know oh so they cut it out of this they don't show them the clip they change the gloves so he's super fresh here and he wound up to wind up stopping henry cooper by cuts see if there's a clip of the glove change in part yeah there's that's funny it's like this is uh mike tyson's old trainer not old trainer but old manager god damn it i forget his name but he was a boxing historian and he put together all of these uh videos and he used to do the voiceover for a lot of these videos too like right when customato died him and shelly finkel took over god damn it what the fuck is his name mike tyson's old manager what he got there pulling up boxing body nope no no it's an old jewish guy Forget his name, but he was a, he had a tremendous library of films.

[279] Yeah.

[280] And it's one of the things that, uh, Mike Tyson used to go and watch, you know, obviously we're talking about the early 80s.

[281] So this is before VHS tapes or, I mean, those things weren't on VHS tapes.

[282] So he would watch them like on like 16 millimeter.

[283] Yeah, yeah.

[284] Yeah.

[285] God damn.

[286] I'm trying to struggle and remember his fucking name.

[287] It's driving me crazy.

[288] Something with a Jay.

[289] Anyway, point being, he probably edited that out.

[290] Yeah.

[291] You know, they didn't want to show the controversy because it was plain, straight, cheating.

[292] They just cheated.

[293] I want to hear what the commentators did during that stall.

[294] It's a good point.

[295] Yeah, so we don't know what's going on.

[296] Did they just veer off into other talk?

[297] Sometimes how baseball commentators just start talking about some weird random shit about their family.

[298] and cars with his downtime I went out fishing this weekend I like it's great man the mosquitoes get to you but hey okay yeah high and away yeah baseball players that's an art to that right because there's so much downtime yeah it's uh oh absolutely it's so much down time I was watching one clip I forget what team it was but it was just one of the it was somebody at bat and then one of his teammates was just exactly mocking his just imitating his batting style and ritual just each from like every little nuance to just what he would do with his left foot and just and he and then he was doing that for all his teammates because you got so much downtime right that you could and you're around them 162 games and plus practice so you're like yeah I know exactly all of your moves all your mannerisms exactly every one of your mannerisms downtime So the I -Switch.

[299] My high school wrestling coach refused to call baseball sport.

[300] He's like, it's not a sport.

[301] Skills game.

[302] It's a skills game.

[303] But you do have to run.

[304] You have to run.

[305] It's not my favorite sport, but I respect it a lot.

[306] I don't, I, I, you know who Javi Baez is from the Cubs?

[307] I don't know anybody who's playing baseball.

[308] Once they get arrested.

[309] That's a lot of people.

[310] You got to be arrested or you got to fuck.

[311] That's how a lot of people found out.

[312] Harvey Baez is one of the best defenders, and it makes incredible plays where you're like, that's, that's athletics.

[313] If somebody.

[314] Oh, for sure.

[315] Yeah, it's certain, but it's a lot of skill involved, but it's definitely, they're definitely athletes, I think.

[316] Yeah, they are, but it's like, there's a big difference between that and say, like, basketball.

[317] Like, you have to be in some extreme cardio to play basketball.

[318] You're running back and forth and back and forth, and, you know, those guys are always so.

[319] sore after games and you know they got fucking planter fasciitis and shoulder issues it's constant activity it's no you know you can be in left field a couple innings and not do anything just chilling out there yeah with your own thoughts talking to the fans and the shit yeah yeah it's none of that in basketball just standing around except for doing free throws or down time but baseball players might go especially if the pitch is killing it yeah you just just that's You just get into your fucking stands half -heartedly, but you know it might not be coming out there.

[320] That's the other thing about baseball.

[321] The fans will torture you.

[322] If you're sitting out there.

[323] Oh, yeah, that's a long time to be out there.

[324] They torture you.

[325] On a way game?

[326] Plus, they're drinking.

[327] There's 18 minutes of action your average Major League Baseball game.

[328] Wow.

[329] That's like less than one fight.

[330] You know?

[331] 18 minutes of action.

[332] That's like one championship fight or less.

[333] Less than one championship fight or basically one three -round fight, which is 15 minutes of action.

[334] It's crazy.

[335] We acted like we made a big discovery and shit.

[336] Yo, baseball boring, yo.

[337] We did it.

[338] Well, baseball is one of those games.

[339] Like, if you try to invent it today, they'd be like, get the fuck away from here with that.

[340] In this day and age, that shit is definitely old school.

[341] But the other thing about that 18 minutes of action, that's not even action of everybody.

[342] That's not everybody moving at once.

[343] Like a football game or basketball, that's maybe three or four people moving around.

[344] Maybe, right?

[345] Depends.

[346] Sometimes it's usually two.

[347] If you turn it in double play, then, you know, it's a handful of people involved in.

[348] But, yeah, it's pretty chill.

[349] It's pretty chill.

[350] It's a lot, a lot of games.

[351] God, it's crazy how much money is involved in it.

[352] People like it, man. But it's gone to, like, Japan.

[353] Where else, what are the countries adopted baseball?

[354] Adopted it?

[355] Took it on.

[356] It was super popular in Japan.

[357] I know Cuba.

[358] Cuba, right?

[359] Maybe Mexico.

[360] Mexico?

[361] Really?

[362] I don't know.

[363] Korea?

[364] I'm just saying stuff.

[365] Yeah, I don't know.

[366] Just guessing.

[367] It's amazing how little interest people here have for soccer.

[368] That's what's really amazing.

[369] When you say soccer worldwide, and you see how little we give a fuck about it here.

[370] Except those annoying white dudes that like to get really hyped up about.

[371] about it when the World Cup comes around and they scream and yell at bars like they really give a fuck.

[372] There's reportedly growing belief that Bryce Harper's next contract could be worth over $400 million.

[373] I couldn't imagine Jesus.

[374] Just that type of just scrutiny and attention on my finances like that.

[375] Right.

[376] There's expectation.

[377] This is not even, not The contract is set yet, but when people are talking about what you might make.

[378] Oh, so much money.

[379] It's a lot of money.

[380] It's too much money.

[381] It's too much money to be resting over your head.

[382] You think $400 is too well?

[383] Say it's about, I don't know.

[384] I mean, it depends on what state he lives in, how much money it actually is.

[385] Well, it becomes a thing, like with Floyd Mayweather, you know?

[386] Like, a big thing about Floyd Mayweather is how much money he makes.

[387] It's not just that he's a great boxer.

[388] It's that he's going to make.

[389] $300 million.

[390] Apparently it's going to be even more than that.

[391] Do you see the pay -per -view numbers?

[392] They're talking about 6 .5 million pay -per -view buys.

[393] So it's more than 2 million more than the Manny Pacquiao fight.

[394] That's insane.

[395] Does that include the potential refunds?

[396] That's a good question.

[397] Well, to me fair, he did nickname himself Money Mayweather.

[398] Well, he did after he was Pretty Boy Floyd.

[399] He changed it.

[400] But yeah, then he built the persona around.

[401] I spend money.

[402] he doesn't have to do I mean it's cool and good for him but he did make a big thing about spending money that one time he showed a like a hundred million dollar check you remember that like wait why is that on like a regular ass check yeah it was just like on a regular chase bank check it wasn't even a big cardboard one not even that or printed out or printed out on a or even a wire or something I want to get that wire Yeah, laminate that thing.

[403] Do you think that's real?

[404] Do you really hold it on to a $100 million check?

[405] But it was just a regular -ass check that you would buy groceries on in the 80s.

[406] Yeah.

[407] Yeah, that shit.

[408] 100 million.

[409] Yeah, I guess he wrote it to himself, so it's...

[410] Made with her promotions, general operating account.

[411] Yeah.

[412] Yeah.

[413] You got a $100 million in a Bank of America?

[414] I guess so.

[415] It seems like he just holds onto it, too.

[416] Hey.

[417] He doesn't cash it?

[418] That's a weird...

[419] I put it out of his book bag at one of the...

[420] Yeah, I saw.

[421] But, I mean, why is he hanging on that?

[422] You should probably cash that.

[423] Well, it's in his other account anyways.

[424] It's Mayweather Promoters account.

[425] Who cares?

[426] So the Mayweather personal account, the checking?

[427] So he's probably going to make more than $300 million from this last fight.

[428] Sure.

[429] Yeah.

[430] Amazing.

[431] I can't imagine that they won't do that again.

[432] That him and...

[433] Connor won't do it again.

[434] With Mayweather?

[435] Connor can figure out how to not get tired.

[436] Yeah, if he can convince people, like, say if he fights Pauli Malinagi.

[437] He's not.

[438] Beats the shit out of Pauli Malinagi.

[439] And then says, Floyd, let's do it one more fucking time.

[440] And I think Floyd would be like, no, man, come on.

[441] We did that already.

[442] I know.

[443] But he starts thinking about that money.

[444] If you could figure out a way to get people excited about it, Connor could get somehow another get more people to pay attention.

[445] Because it was an interesting fight for the first three.

[446] three or four rounds.

[447] He made it look interesting, but it really wasn't interesting.

[448] I thought it was interested, but then when I thought back, it wasn't interested.

[449] Well, he caught Floyd clean.

[450] You know, he caught him with an uppercut in the first round.

[451] Nobody hits Floyd clean like that.

[452] Floyd underestimated him, I think.

[453] Also, he wasn't doing that shoulder roll.

[454] No. He was, because he wanted to, he didn't believe in Connor's power.

[455] So Floyd usually boxes.

[456] Do you think that's what it is?

[457] You always see him boxing that.

[458] Like, he boxed Canello, and he does.

[459] that and he goes off of that counter?

[460] I don't think that's what it was.

[461] I think he knew that Connor was going to get tired if he was backing up.

[462] You know that Connor has endurance problems.

[463] And as long as he wasn't throwing a lot of punches, which Floyd wasn't, and he's constantly faking and moving, he's got Connor backing up.

[464] It's way easier to be defensive if you're not being offensive.

[465] So if you're not thinking about hitting the guy, if you're constantly like fainting and you've got your hands up and you're moving forward, but really what you're thinking about is what he's throwing, you can get away with.

[466] a lot and you could press forward a lot more because you're going to see the punches coming because you're not really thinking too much about throwing your own punches unless it's like a clear wide opening so for the first couple of rounds he's mostly like putting pressure on him sizing him up when i watched it after the fight it became way more obvious like while you're watching it you're like what's going to happen what's going to happen once you already know what's happened then uh then i watched it and i said oh i could see exactly what he's doing he's fainting putting a lot of pressure on connor and he's making connor back up a lot which is his exhausting and then also Connor's not very efficient he's not a boxer so like there's a lot of energy being wasted he's going to get tired more easily and then he doesn't run so he doesn't have the same kind of endurance that Floyd has it's a lot of factors in there yeah it was 111 punches but some of them were like yeah the ones that Connor landed you mean yeah there was a few of and they were like little poops yeah there were also like weird ones like patty little patty pack punches to the side of the head yeah in the back of the head This is one meme.

[467] It shows kind of like this, and it just says, fork this box and shit.

[468] Well, you know, you get used to that in MMA.

[469] You know, you get used to hammer fists.

[470] Well, I think that's what I saw.

[471] I was talking about, and a lot of other people were just wondering if muscle memory is going to just kick in, and he was going to do some weird information.

[472] And it did kick in a little bit, but not to the extreme.

[473] Yeah, I think there was some massive penalties for any sort.

[474] He had any sort of a point deduction or anything that they did is something illegal.

[475] I think he had a massive penalty.

[476] More than a million dollars for each thing he fucked up with.

[477] 10 mil for each one?

[478] That makes sense.

[479] That 10 mil for each one makes you get your shit together.

[480] As long as he doesn't get disqualified, it might be worth it.

[481] Like 10 million for one fucking knee to the body.

[482] You know, I didn't know you used to fight until after the.

[483] last time I did the podcast.

[484] I just thought you got it worked out a lot and just really liked mixed martial arts in combat.

[485] Well, I never fought mixed martial arts because it wasn't around.

[486] But kickboxing though.

[487] Yeah, I did that.

[488] Yeah, because I remember just seeing somebody said, yo, you're talking about Rogan like that?

[489] He'll kick you in your shit.

[490] And I'm like, what?

[491] And then I looked up Rogan kickboxing.

[492] And I'm like, what the fuck?

[493] This whole time.

[494] He was shooting his shit out of her back.

[495] Yeah.

[496] How'd that feel, man?

[497] To hit somebody?

[498] It feels weird.

[499] The bag.

[500] Oh, bag's easy.

[501] Bags don't hit back.

[502] When's the last time you hit somebody?

[503] In anger?

[504] Or in competition?

[505] It's been a long fucking time.

[506] In anger?

[507] Neither one.

[508] Neither one.

[509] That's even longer.

[510] Yeah.

[511] In anger, it's probably a high school.

[512] Oh, shit.

[513] But in competition, well, I was 22 or something like that.

[514] That was a tight one -no tournament.

[515] I was 19 then.

[516] Oh.

[517] And that was your.

[518] you?

[519] Yeah, that was me. That was me with the walk off.

[520] If you kick somebody to the body like that, a spinning back kick to the body, there's so much force.

[521] He got all the bulletproof though.

[522] Doesn't matter.

[523] That thing, that's just moral protection.

[524] Oh, man. That's not helping you.

[525] So, what was your, at that moment when you saw him laying down?

[526] He's dead.

[527] I knew he was gone.

[528] But, I mean, not dead.

[529] You know.

[530] What you're thinking?

[531] Damn.

[532] He's not getting out.

[533] Oh, was it one?

[534] Yeah.

[535] You have to walk away and, like, make it look like it's no big deal.

[536] That was how my thought process was.

[537] Don't get excited.

[538] Maybe it looks like, this is what I'm going to do to everybody.

[539] Just relax.

[540] Just walk off and have everybody so nervous that you don't even care.

[541] Like, this is just a normal thing for you.

[542] You kick people, they go unconscious.

[543] They fall down, they can't get up.

[544] You've got to have the people because you're in a tournament.

[545] So you're going to be fighting a bunch of people sitting around watching.

[546] Yeah, you might have to fight three or four times at a day.

[547] Who was there rooting for you?

[548] My teammates, guys that I train with.

[549] Yeah.

[550] It doesn't even see, like even when I watch that, it doesn't really feel like me. So long ago.

[551] Just the hair.

[552] Well, not of me that.

[553] I mean, I also have a head protector on the back of my head.

[554] They would wear these head protectors.

[555] Either you could wear a full one that covers your whole head, like over your ears, or you wear one that's just the back of your head, which is really just there.

[556] So when you get knocked out, your head doesn't fucking bounce off the ground.

[557] Yeah.

[558] Because we were fighting on a basketball court.

[559] If you look at that, that's just a wood floor.

[560] Shit.

[561] Yeah, there's a lot of that.

[562] We fought on a hockey rink once where they put a plastic sheet down on a hockey rink.

[563] It was not the ice, but the cement underneath the hockey rink.

[564] So we were basically fighting on cement.

[565] So the 80s were terrible as what you said.

[566] Fucking awful.

[567] Bad for brain damage, that's for sure.

[568] A lot of people got fucked up, knocked out, and bounced their head off the ground.

[569] Jesus.

[570] I saw a lot of that.

[571] Yeah.

[572] Not good.

[573] And for no money.

[574] That's the thing.

[575] There's no future.

[576] No future and no money.

[577] For the love of the game.

[578] Well, I guess it prepares you for life.

[579] And also, you wanted to find out.

[580] I wanted to find out how I would do, you know.

[581] I wanted to find out what it would be like to compete under high -stress situations, like worrying about someone kicking you in the face.

[582] Yeah.

[583] I'm glad that most people can't kick somebody in the face, so I'm glad.

[584] That's whenever I go to a UFC fight or MMA, I just, whenever somebody gets kicked in the face, I'm like, man, if I got kicked in a face, I'd be so disappointed.

[585] I'm like, ah.

[586] It's not good.

[587] It's not, it looks crazy.

[588] Yeah, it's terrible for you.

[589] The thing is, more people can kick people in the face now than I think at any other time in human history.

[590] I think there's a lot of fucking people that can kick people in the face now because of watching MMA and the internet, taking classes and training.

[591] I think more people are training now than ever before.

[592] For sure, there's way more people that can strangle people than ever.

[593] Oh, yeah.

[594] 100%.

[595] Because the choke is easier to learn?

[596] No, it's just more people are doing jiu -jitsu.

[597] than any other time in history.

[598] Like before, like, in my early martial arts days, there was no one that was doing grappling, really.

[599] Like, I wrestled in high school, and then there was no, like, jujitsu classes.

[600] There was, like, you could take judo.

[601] Like, there was judo, but there was very few, like, actual, like, submission grappling schools or anything like that.

[602] Even nationwide, there was a small handful.

[603] Nobody knew what the fuck they were doing.

[604] Now, everywhere you look, there's a jihitsu school.

[605] Yeah.

[606] Like, I was down in San Diego.

[607] just San Diego alone which is not a big city they must have a hundred jiu jitza schools just in San Diego shit it's crazy I'm gonna start sponsoring more fighters yeah are you remember I sponsored the one and she missed weight yeah and Invicta right yeah yeah you're gonna do more I am some other people reached out I gotta just get some new designs for the clothes that's really must have been holding me back I gotta get some new designs that was an okay design but I gotta mix do you have like your face on her ass or something like that It was all around the whole body.

[608] It wasn't just the ass, it was just in case, you know, just in case she got knocked out and fell on her face, then boom, hannibal burrs .com.

[609] Mm. Yeah.

[610] Yeah, you could do it in some organizations still.

[611] There it is.

[612] There it is.

[613] Oh, yeah, it's all over.

[614] That's hilarious.

[615] And she didn't make weight.

[616] She didn't make weight.

[617] I think it's harder for girls to make weight.

[618] Well, she was cutting, well, she's fighting next week at, I think she was trying to fight at, 115 and she's fighting at 125 now or she was trying to fight I think she was trying to fight at 105 and now fighting at one either or she's cutting less weight she's cutting less weight this time that was the other thought about the Connor fight a lot of people thought that Connor cut too much weight that's one of the reasons why he burnt out yeah that's part of it I think it was a factor he does cut a lot of weight and that does drain your body and it's not like when he's training he's cutting that weight because he's not you know like you only do it once You do it right before the weigh -ins.

[619] You weigh in, and then you put the weight back on.

[620] So all that endurance training, all those hard rounds that you did, that's not after you're dehydrating yourself severely.

[621] So your body's not used to operate at that level with this situation.

[622] Yeah.

[623] Well, he's used to it because he fights an MMA like that.

[624] But MMA, you get more chances to take a break.

[625] It's different.

[626] You know, it's more exhausting.

[627] Like, it could potentially be more exhausting because there's grappling.

[628] and there's kicks and there's just a lot more going on and you're fighting five minute rounds like you have more of a chance to get tired in that five minute rounds but when you clinch with someone you could actually hold on to them like your referee's not going to break it you can take them to the ground and get on top of them you can hold your position and catch your breath there's there's more opportunities to recover right that weight cutting is the worst part of fighting 100 % it seems it was even the fighter that uh janea Lisa was supposed to fight that day.

[629] She took a picture of herself, and she made weight.

[630] But it looked terrible.

[631] It was definitely 105, not that I remember, because 115 wouldn't look crazy like that.

[632] Well, it could if you were, you know, cutting a shit load away.

[633] But 105, it was just like, she was like, I made weight.

[634] And I was like, oh, you okay?

[635] It was just that she put it in a phone on Instagram.

[636] I'm like, you know what?

[637] She tried.

[638] She tried.

[639] Try out to make weight.

[640] Shit, who cares?

[641] A few pounds.

[642] But I guess those few pounds matter, obviously, if somebody's overweight and didn't go through the strenuous process that you went to, then they come in at an advantage.

[643] Yeah, you have an advantage if you're not dehydrating yourself as much.

[644] But that advantage is crazy.

[645] Like, they should stop doing that.

[646] They really should figure out a way to stop fighters from cutting weight like that.

[647] What's the alternative?

[648] The alternative is to weigh them, like, randomly, the same way they catch people with drugs, like random drug tests, do random way.

[649] weight tests like they show up and they go oh hannah but look you're 175 pounds you're supposed to be fighting at 155 what the fuck is that like okay and then they catch you again okay well you're 176 pounds today well you're definitely not fighting at 155 and they'll they'll give you a weight parameter like it says it's healthy for you to cut 10 pounds you got to fight at 166 okay that's your weight so it'll force fighters to be more disciplined about their their actual weight like you can't balloon up in between rounds or in between competition and And you're also, you know, you have to think about how much weight you could actually dehydrate out of your body healthy.

[650] California has some new laws.

[651] Like, they'll only let you cut a certain amount of weight.

[652] Like, they'll, they periodically measure people, like, during their camp.

[653] Yeah.

[654] They give them an opportunity, and they measure them during their camp.

[655] And there's one of the reasons, like, Hennon Barrow, who was the Bantleway champion, he fought Al Jermaine Sterling, but they wouldn't let him fight at 135.

[656] They made him fight at 140.

[657] Okay.

[658] Because, like, he cut too much weight.

[659] Catch weight?

[660] I think that should be the option for the crazy fighters, just to whatever weight you want to be class.

[661] That should be one.

[662] Like for the fighters, they might not be active or not on the bill.

[663] And we got this spot, like a guest spot.

[664] A guest spot on the comedy show.

[665] You know, somebody just pops up, hey, a pop -up fight.

[666] No matter what the way it is, these two fighters, whatever the fuck weight they want to be, they've agreed to fight.

[667] We got this guy coming in at 165, this other guy coming in at 2 .15.

[668] They agreed to fight each other.

[669] You're cool with that?

[670] Like old school?

[671] UFC 1.

[672] Yeah, like the old school.

[673] But not crazy, you know, not sumo wrestler versus, you know, 100 pound dude.

[674] How much weight?

[675] 30 pounds difference?

[676] Like, what's the cap?

[677] I think it's up to the, leave it up to the purse.

[678] It's a guest spot.

[679] It's the guest spot.

[680] Fight.

[681] Well, a lot of people do that in grappling tournaments and grappling.

[682] tournaments they have the absolute division and the absolute division sometimes the lighter guys win the whole thing yeah but there's no hitting that's the thing about grappling you know it's like you can you can get by in skill and technique and an understanding of positioning whereas like you know you're fighting a guy like like francisangano someone like that just a giant 265 pound dude if you're a 150 pound guy you're fucked you're just fucked that guy he's what a 8 -0 or something or he's 10 and 1.

[683] 10 and 1.

[684] Yeah, I think he lost one of his early fights.

[685] The commission, okay, look at that.

[686] They have a 10 -point plan to curb the weight cutting while protecting fighters now normalized and the commission's rules are a steeper fine for missing weight.

[687] A 10 % cap on the weight of fighter is allowed to gain between the time the weigh -ins.

[688] Oh, that's interesting.

[689] And an event and the weight class restrictions for those who miss weight more than once.

[690] They also recognize four new weight classes.

[691] I think that's huge.

[692] have a bunch of weight classes.

[693] They should have weight classes every 10 pounds.

[694] That guy, Andy Foster, he's the California State Athletic Commission Executive Director.

[695] He's the shit.

[696] That guy's awesome.

[697] He really is the most proactive out of all the athletic commission guys.

[698] So that's it.

[699] They'll figure it out.

[700] They ban the use of IVs, which is interesting too.

[701] Because IVs help you considerably to rehydrate.

[702] Sure.

[703] Yeah.

[704] They banned them?

[705] Yeah, they banned them.

[706] They don't want people relying on that.

[707] Stay thirsty, motherfucker.

[708] Stay thirsty.

[709] Get punched.

[710] Fight time.

[711] All these articles about Kevin Durant, about talking shit about Under Armour.

[712] Dude, that crushed their stock yesterday.

[713] It's crazy.

[714] It's crazy.

[715] Kevin Durant is the Trump of basketball shoe stocks?

[716] No, you know what he did?

[717] He's just, like, casually commenting about, like, how kids will pick schools based on what sneakers they're going to have to wear.

[718] Pretty true.

[719] Yeah.

[720] NBA star Durant takes a shot at Under Armour, but he just said it in a matter -of -fact sort of a way.

[721] He's like, kids don't want to play an Under Armour.

[722] See, look at this.

[723] Nobody wants to play in Under Armour's, I'm sorry.

[724] The top kids don't because they all play Nike.

[725] On a podcast.

[726] Yeah, I did.

[727] On a podcast.

[728] And if you dropped the stock.

[729] Is that what it was a podcast?

[730] Yeah, the Ringer podcast.

[731] The Ringer podcast.

[732] It dropped the stock 3%.

[733] You know how much money that must be?

[734] For a giant company like Under Armour, 3%, that's a billion -dollar plus.

[735] company.

[736] 3 % is probably tens of millions of dollars, right?

[737] Get a bounce back, though.

[738] How much is the actual difference?

[739] Oh, it's down 44 % since the start of the year.

[740] Oh, that's not good if it's already been sliding.

[741] Yeah, there's a lot of issues with Under Armour and hunting, too.

[742] A lot of people think that Under Armour is, they're worried about their hunting division because, like, anti -hunters, they're, like, the only gigantic company that has the stones to support something that's as controversial as hunting.

[743] They haven't been around very long, though, either, right?

[744] Under Armour?

[745] 15 years, maybe?

[746] I think it's a good question.

[747] I think they're in the, I think they're from the 90s.

[748] I read some Adidas started back long, long time ago, and that's two brothers, and that's where Puma started.

[749] The two brothers started Adidas and Puma or something like that.

[750] Adidas is from, I mean, remember Run DMC?

[751] my Adidas.

[752] That's like 1980 something.

[753] They're just now rebounding from the problems that night Did you pee that quick?

[754] You're a wizard How the hell does you do that?

[755] Listen man You just got a hatch, just open it up and pour it out.

[756] I'm trying to be professional That's the craziest fastest pee of ever seen You've down three water since you've been here man You like all this talk about these fighters dehydrate yourself.

[757] You're like fuck that I don't have to live by those rules Nope, not in this game We were talking about Under Armour They have a hunting division And they take a ton of shit.

[758] Because I know those, there's a bunch of, like, crowd fund things, not crowd funds.

[759] What are those things?

[760] No, it wasn't a fun thing.

[761] It was a crowd something or another.

[762] They were going after Cameron Haynes.

[763] Because they were calling them a trophy hunter, and they were trying to get Under Armour to drop him.

[764] But then you look at, like, how many people, like, their hunting division is this tiny division.

[765] And then Under Armour itself, the company is just gigantic.

[766] It's very interesting.

[767] There's not a lot of companies that would be that big that would support hunting.

[768] It takes a lot of balls.

[769] Yeah.

[770] That means the CEO is definitely into hunting.

[771] It's like, this is my buddies.

[772] Yeah.

[773] Because he's all the reason.

[774] Well, yeah, the owners.

[775] And it's like, you can imagine if Nike got into hunting?

[776] It's no way.

[777] Nike was in golf with Tiger Woods, and obviously he was a gigantic athlete for them.

[778] But now that he's not out there, even playing golf, Division, I think they just closed it this year.

[779] They don't even make anything anymore.

[780] Really?

[781] They don't make some clothes and some shoes.

[782] Like, they're putting golf spikes on the bottom of Jordans, but, like, they don't make clubs or anything anymore, I think is what the They just putting golf spikes on the bottom of Georgia.

[783] Get some of those extra Jordans out there from the recall section and just throw some spikes on there and just get them out to the U .S. Open.

[784] Well, we were talking last night about rappers that get sponsored by shoe companies at the store.

[785] I didn't know that rappers had contracts with shoe.

[786] companies.

[787] For years.

[788] Nike announces it will no longer make golf clubs, balls, and bags.

[789] We just said Adidas and I run DMC.

[790] They probably for sure had a contract.

[791] Jay Z, 50 Cent, and Jay Z had a commercial.

[792] Rapping back and forth for each other.

[793] Who else?

[794] Kanye has his own shoe.

[795] He has his own.

[796] Yeah, but he had it with Nike originally and then went to Adidas.

[797] But it's only rappers.

[798] Could you imagine if a comic?

[799] Kevin Hart.

[800] Kevin Hart.

[801] Kevin Hart's different.

[802] Well, you have to go to the next absolute stratosphere as a comic.

[803] Or, I mean, unless you really want to do it and do it on a small artisanal level, then you could do whatever you want to do.

[804] Yeah, I guess, right?

[805] That's a weird thing, though, that rappers get sponsored by shoe companies.

[806] Why?

[807] Well, like Kendrick Lamar.

[808] Yeah.

[809] He's got some sort of a shoe company thing, right?

[810] Popular person?

[811] Huge.

[812] Yeah.

[813] Right.

[814] But does that guy work out?

[815] I think Kendrick probably works out.

[816] Probably.

[817] A little bit.

[818] Because, you know what?

[819] It's certain rappers, I could tell that they work out based on their show.

[820] Really?

[821] Oh, because they have energy?

[822] Well, not even just energy, but if your songs and your lyrics are very dense, where you're and you rap, that takes a lot of breath control and cardio, especially if you're not doing it, if you don't have a hype man on stage with you a hype man a hype man is somebody just is not just for energy it's so you can catch your breath and so he'll take those last couple words on the line and then you catch your breath and then you come back because a lot of people don't have the breath control so a lot of times even if somebody's not ripped they're in shape their lungs are in shape if they can do a whole a whole show of just you know kind of raping fire songs and shit yeah i never thought about that a hype man huh yeah that's what hype man i mean as far in it it's definitely they bring the energy up but a lot of time if you see a rapper and at their show and they don't have a hype man they're like you know i can spit my own shit all the way i don't need a hype man yeah yeah especially if they're fast with their lyrics right yeah and kendrick doesn't you know he doesn't rap over his own beats that's a pep heave of mine a lot of big rappers and they will just rap over the song the actual song at their own lip -syncing almost pretty much just rapping over the shit at their own concert now get sometimes if say you pop up at somebody's show to do a guest spot as a rapper and you do your biggest song this person's DJ doesn't have your instrumental he only has a regular track didn't wrap over that but it's just show I don't want to hear you rap over that because you're just rapping over this well -produced song I'd rather just hear this shit Krisby in the club right yeah Yeah, just otherwise you're just seeing their presence, and that's enough?

[823] Yeah, it's just, I mean, it's still, you know, it's still fun, but it's just not, when you know what the alternative is, which is you being a good polished performer, then you're like, come on, man, just don't wrap over your shit.

[824] Yeah, that's a weird pop thing, right?

[825] Pop singers are kind of allowed to do it, but we know they do it, but when they get busted, it's a huge deal.

[826] Like, what was the girl, Ashley, what the fuck's her name?

[827] Ashley Simpson on.

[828] Ashley Simpson at life.

[829] That was a big disaster, right?

[830] She kind of vanished after that.

[831] It's bad timing for that, too.

[832] Bad timing?

[833] How so?

[834] She had a show.

[835] They were trying to ramp her up on TV, like they were fought the diary of that.

[836] Oh, yeah.

[837] They pulled the plug on that fucker.

[838] That's it for her.

[839] Yeah.

[840] Ever heard about her again?

[841] Not really.

[842] Not really, right?

[843] Sorry to party.

[844] That was like 15 years ago, right?

[845] At least.

[846] That 15.

[847] I think it might have been.

[848] No, it was like, easy 10?

[849] Easy 10?

[850] It was before.

[851] I worked there in 2000.

[852] nine, so it was a couple years before that.

[853] I'm going to guess 06 for my I'm looking at 0, 2004.

[854] What is it?

[855] 2004 is when I. Oh, shit.

[856] Wow.

[857] Yeah.

[858] Damn.

[859] 13 fucking years.

[860] Time will fly.

[861] Yeah.

[862] It does not wait for you.

[863] You've got to be, yeah, if you're going to be a person who sings on stage and moves around on stage and you're not going to be going over your track, you have to be in some serious shape.

[864] Yeah, it's, uh, to put on a solid show.

[865] Yeah, you got it.

[866] She promises new music in 2017.

[867] You just fucking re -broke Ashley Simpson.

[868] Breaking her music now, letting everybody know.

[869] Where'd you find out?

[870] Yeah, but this is December 14th, 2016.

[871] She promised it.

[872] She's not come out yet.

[873] She's 45 now.

[874] Look at her.

[875] She's got kids.

[876] She teaches yoga.

[877] She found value in other things besides show business.

[878] Sometimes you got to.

[879] Good for her.

[880] It's probably a good move for some people, you know.

[881] Just get out.

[882] We were looking at What the fuck's his name?

[883] Mick Jagger's routine Like Mick Jagger's 185 years old And that dude works out Twice a day Yeah Like he does yoga He lifts weights He has trainers Like he's just doing everything To try to keep his body together Like hang in there mate I want to keep fucking supermodels Hang in there Is this girl like 27?

[884] Yeah he's got like an 18 year old girl Oh, man. I train five, six days a week, but I don't go crazy.

[885] I alternate between gym work and dancing.

[886] Then I do sprints, things like that.

[887] I'm training for stamina.

[888] He's shredded, though.

[889] They had a picture of, like, Mick Jagger, like his body.

[890] Eight miles a day.

[891] Damn, he runs eight miles a day, swimming, kickboxing, and cycling.

[892] How old is he?

[893] He's got to be like 72, right?

[894] Let's take a guess.

[895] How old do you think Mick Jagger is?

[896] Yeah, he's seven.

[897] Yeah, I think 72 is good.

[898] Yeah, 72, 73.

[899] I remember seeing something.

[900] When we were kids, 72 -year -olds were dead.

[901] Absolutely.

[902] There was nothing left.

[903] Like you were on empty.

[904] Your body was falling.

[905] 74.

[906] Damn.

[907] He's almost 80.

[908] He's almost 100 then.

[909] How long is he going to live?

[910] I don't know.

[911] How does Melanie have?

[912] How old is Melanie?

[913] Oh, is that his girlfriend?

[914] Look at her hot as fun.

[915] Born in 87.

[916] She's 30.

[917] Oh, Mick, you dirty dick!

[918] She's just turned 30, and he knocked her up, right?

[919] Didn't he shoot a live one in there?

[920] Yeah.

[921] What are the odds that kid's going to come out and not have superpowers?

[922] All this stuff that he's taken to stay young?

[923] Wow, that's crazy.

[924] 30 years old.

[925] Here's what I want.

[926] She's hot.

[927] Maybe Mick Jagger, because of...

[928] That's the baby.

[929] Giant head.

[930] Look, the kid can read minds.

[931] That kid's heads filled with vice.

[932] vitamins and anti -aging serum.

[933] Look at her.

[934] She's like, your daddy's 74.

[935] Your daddy's older than the president.

[936] Yeah, we have to find you a positive role model because your daddy probably won't be around very much longer.

[937] Have you heard of Maroon 5 at all?

[938] When you're 74 and you're having a kid, that is super ambitious.

[939] Like, you're optimistic as fuck to be 74 and have a kid.

[940] Yeah.

[941] I'm 34 and I'm like, yo, I'm not.

[942] need to fuck it if i'm gonna have kids i need to got to get it in now make something happening over the next couple years yeah it's a good move yeah but i would never at 74 of brand new one yeah that's weird super bold i guess it's just like you know you know he's got a great story about that you know theo vaughan do you know theo yeah hilarious dude he's fucking hilarious uh his dad was like in his 70s when he had him oh and he's got hilarious stories about going to school and like telling people that's his grandpa and being embarrassed that's his dad That's fair.

[943] Falling asleep everywhere.

[944] Sounds like fair behavior for a kid.

[945] Who's Jager?

[946] This is a girl?

[947] His first kid's 45.

[948] Jesus Christ.

[949] Oh, man. His first kid could be his girlfriend's mom.

[950] He might have an older one, too.

[951] Oh, man. Is he married to the girl, the new girl?

[952] No. It says spouse?

[953] He's probably like, why not?

[954] I'll get married.

[955] Well, don't give a fuck.

[956] Take my money.

[957] It's part.

[958] Oh, partner.

[959] Even better.

[960] Partner.

[961] That's how you do it.

[962] It means I'm giving my money to my kids.

[963] A partner means fool me twice, same on me. Fool me three times.

[964] I'm senile.

[965] Oh, man. I'm not move in and collect on my estate.

[966] She's listed as lover.

[967] Lover.

[968] Nick Jackson.

[969] Isn't that funny that we have, like, distinctions?

[970] Like, did you, or did you not scribble on the paper?

[971] Did you or did you not agree to some stupid shit that doesn't make any sense financially?

[972] Did you or did you know?

[973] Is your estate at stake with this relationship?

[974] Is it or is or is or not?

[975] Can you just shoot loads in her random or willy -nilly or does she have access to half of your money?

[976] Let me know.

[977] Nope.

[978] She does.

[979] Let me know.

[980] What's going on?

[981] What's the deal?

[982] What kind of deal would you guys make?

[983] That deal is just so weird.

[984] I have a friend that is a super rich dude and he was getting married and his wife did not want a prenuptial.

[985] And he was like, well, this is crazy.

[986] Like, why wouldn't I get a prenuptial?

[987] Like if we stay together, like we don't have to worry about anything because, you know, you'll be fine.

[988] You'll have plenty of money.

[989] but if we break up, why would I be in a situation where you could get half my money?

[990] It's usually, you don't think this relationship is going to last.

[991] No, no, no, I think it's going to last.

[992] That's why I want a prenuptial because it's not going to matter.

[993] Right.

[994] And if it doesn't last, let's work out a side deal that is not half.

[995] Yeah, you can't just hold that over me. Like, well, his ex -wife held it over him.

[996] Like, he didn't have a pre -nup.

[997] And when they got divorced, it was a disaster.

[998] And so then he was going into a second marriage And this lady was like I don't want a pre -nut And he was like, what?

[999] I've already done this Like, the fuck out of here It's a tough combo Yeah, it's like if it works out It works out That's a, yeah That's a heavy I've had some heavy combos in my life But those are, that's one of the ones Where Yeah, we've been kicking it for a couple years But I don't want you to Just in case this goes poorly Let's just get this out of the way real quick Got to be careful like what stage of the relationship you do this too because in the beginning like if you decide to get married after like six months you're like you're on drugs right you're you're bliss you're bliss out you can't believe the relationship's working so well it's amazing she's incredible she's my life she's my partner she's my soul she's my partner she's everything to me then you just get sick of each other about two three years in and then what's that seven year itch you know that seven year inch i've not had She starts talking to a lawyer.

[1000] And she goes, okay, listen, let's just, if I get divorced now.

[1001] And then the lawyer goes, well, how much money is he making now?

[1002] Does he have any other financial opportunities that are on the table that could perhaps increase his wealth over the next few years?

[1003] Because you might want to hang in there for a few.

[1004] Start thinking about it mercenary -like.

[1005] Like, if I just get to 11 years, if I get to 11 years, then he gets the CEO position.

[1006] And then he starts making X amount of money.

[1007] Sounds terrible.

[1008] Just the idea.

[1009] of living in the house with a woman and then she starts hating you or resenting you at some point.

[1010] And then starts plotting leaving while all just still just living in the house.

[1011] Hey, hey, honey, blah, blah, blah.

[1012] And then just going through the motions of what a marriage is supposed to be.

[1013] But secretly going to end it and she kind of knows exactly when she's going to end it.

[1014] That sounds terrifying.

[1015] It's terrifying, but it's also adorable.

[1016] It makes me laugh It makes me laugh Because it's so silly Because it's like such a human thing Like it's not It's such a cultural and a human thing And it's this weird lottery Like this is the reason why Men are attractive To women at all When they're really wealthy If they're gross You know if you see a gross dude Like who's that guy Rupert Murdoch The guy who owns Fox Yeah He's like he's old as fuck He's like doesn't take care Of his body He's kind of like But he's got this hot wife Right There's something adorable about that because it's this weird human folly thing that we've got going on.

[1017] Provider and security and all that shit.

[1018] It's a little bit of that.

[1019] Allure and power, blah, blah, blah.

[1020] But it's also a scam.

[1021] And what's interesting is a guy like that becomes attractive because he's wealthy.

[1022] And the woman's not wealthy, right?

[1023] You got to assume if she's worth a billion dollars, he wouldn't be attracted.

[1024] She'd just start fucking her personal trainer and I'll buy you a Ferrari, honey, eat mommy's pussy.

[1025] You know, like that kind of shit.

[1026] But if you get to a situation where you find this old dude and, you know, well, he's just really kind to me and other young guys.

[1027] They just wanted to have sex and leave me and he just takes care of me. And then, what is that?

[1028] Is that Rupert Murdo?

[1029] Secretary of the Treasury Muncheon.

[1030] Oh, yeah, he's got a banging hot wife.

[1031] That's the lady that got in trouble because she was tweeting about all the different clothes and things she had on a government trip.

[1032] She's on a government jet and she's like tagging all the bag she wears.

[1033] and the shoes she wears and she's smoking and he looks like he looks like her dad easily right doesn't he for sure he's gross Twitter that when you think about how many people have lost jobs and money because of Twitter's really fascinating I've had a situation happen because of but nothing I haven't done any I haven't had a stupid -ass social media blow out but when you think about how insane it is with that where this is a media where you can literally control every single word you say and you still say some wild shit that cost you millions of dollars or cost you relationships things that you would say around your friends you don't think twice about and you say it online what I was going to say about these rich women though is that like when you're a wealthy man and the woman's not wealthy the fact that you're wealthy is attractive but then if she marries you she's rich too now now you're just a dude and now you're gross and now she wants to stay rich so she has to just kind of hang in there are you talking me out of getting married trying to I always tell people it's one day won't be around yeah one day marriage won't be a thing It's going to take time You know, I spend my money on What?

[1034] I do random Which I was I was caught in a weird Internet Wormhole last week I was a little high And on some Adderall And I clicked on this High and on Adderall Or high on Adderall High on wheat And on Adderall Jesus, what's that like?

[1035] It's great Because you have the focus And energy of Adderall But then the creativity of wheat Ooh Yeah, it's a good combo.

[1036] Do you write like that?

[1037] Is that how you write?

[1038] I was planning to write, but I just took some different turns on the internet than I would normally take.

[1039] I should have written.

[1040] But it's just, when you take Adara, what you're supposed to do is when you take it, you're supposed to get settled with what you want to work on right away.

[1041] And then when it kicks in, you'll focus in on it.

[1042] Versus, you know, I think when my shit kicked in, I was just on the internet, so I just really dug deep into the internet.

[1043] And so, uh, there was, It was this article about this guy on this comedian that has all these funny tweets.

[1044] And so I started looking at his tweets.

[1045] He had good tweets.

[1046] And then one of his tweets said, I helped my friend go to wrestling school.

[1047] And it was this young woman that wants to go to wrestling.

[1048] She wants to go to pro wrestling school.

[1049] And I went to WW Smackdown a couple days prior.

[1050] So wrestling was kind of on my brain.

[1051] So she had to go fund me. and I just paid for her wrestling school never better in my life I ain't got no cars Joe That's Adderall and weed Just Adderall and weed And just going to rest and doing the week And just pay for some random wrestling school Do you just Uber everywhere?

[1052] Yeah I rent cars some places But yeah when I'm in L .A. Uber a lift around.

[1053] But like where you live?

[1054] In Chicago I'll get a I'll get a rental But I'm not there that much Even though my residence in Chicago now, I'm still moving around a lot.

[1055] And so for my own frugality, I can't justify having a car yet.

[1056] I am going to get one.

[1057] I'm going to break out of it.

[1058] My dad is super cheap, and so that's just kind of his bargain.

[1059] So I'm still, I'm lightly extravagant and cheap and practical at the same time.

[1060] That looks like an extravagant watch.

[1061] What is that?

[1062] This is, I don't know the name, Berrera.

[1063] It's beautiful I bought it Because I was hyped Before I was shopping Before I did some shows At Radio City with Chappelle And so I was Right before sound check I was like I need to buy A shirt I bought a nice shirt And then I was like fuck it I'm gonna get a nice watch And it wasn't It's not that crazy It was like 700 bucks or some shit Oh okay Yeah it's reasonable Yeah it's a reasonable It's too much for a watch But not any stupid But that's the one thing That fucks me up about watches Like if you told me That watch was 10 grand I'd be like, oh, okay.

[1064] Like, it's the same thing.

[1065] It looks like it could be a 10 grand watch, right?

[1066] Watches are weird like that, man. The watch is a weird, but it just kind of, they pop on stage a little bit, and it's a, you know, it's a bracelet with the time.

[1067] Yeah.

[1068] Did you see that Floyd Mayweather watch?

[1069] We were talking about that, the La Ferrari that's all crystal, $600 ,000.

[1070] It looks like some futuristic shit.

[1071] Yeah, it looks stupid.

[1072] 600 grand on a watch.

[1073] Six hundred grand.

[1074] See, I could never.

[1075] Never.

[1076] Yeah.

[1077] This is stupid.

[1078] Even still, even still now when I. have this i'd be like 700 bucks on this jesus christ guess we had to book that gig in boise to cover this shit can be doing this gonna end up on 30 for 30 broke that what kind of car are you gonna get i think i like the tesla oh okay yeah you're gonna go electric yeah like just what if you have to get out of town quick and there's you have to hope that there's electricity like out of town quick yeah like what if some shit goes down like what there's some sort of an earthquake or something uh i'll guess i'll just get somebody else car i mean i got friends and shit and i'm sure they'll be leaving too so hop a ride yeah the thing about teslas against me i love them i think they're great but you really can only drive them 250 miles yeah i don't give a fuck what they say and even that you better be driving slow because if you're driving fast or if you're driving in traffic like uh my business manager came out to anaheim for the ufc he drove from uh hollywood to anaheim and his shit was dead by the time we got to Anaheim.

[1079] Oh, because there's traffic.

[1080] Yeah, so he was stuck in traffic.

[1081] And it was no, like, shit on the, off the road to charge up?

[1082] He had to find a super station, so you got to go sit there for a half an hour at the super station, and when you do that, it fills up to, like, 75 % or something like that.

[1083] Oh.

[1084] Yeah, that part's a little weird.

[1085] For city driving, no. Maybe I'd get a used car that's practical for the apocalypse.

[1086] Why don't you get, like, a hybrid?

[1087] Like a Lexus Hybrid, yeah Those are the shit And you can operate I think they have a switch Where you could operate I know they have that for the Accura The NSX, that new NSX They have an all -electric mode Where you could drive it totally electric Or you hit all the switches And it's boom Yeah And it's super fast Plus looks fresh You know what Yeah there you go Lexus Hybrid That's a badass car too that coop because it's sporty but it's just understated enough where you're not driving a Ferrari or a Porsche or something like that but it's a badass car.

[1088] That one right there what is that the L -S L -C -H?

[1089] Yeah it's a badass car.

[1090] Yeah Yeah baby that's what you need to get.

[1091] You get yourself one of those look at that thing.

[1092] That's slick.

[1093] That's pretty slick.

[1094] That's a wicked looking car and you know what I like about Lexuses man?

[1095] They just never break.

[1096] This is my second Lexus that I have right now and I've never had a single fucking problem with them those things just never break you just drive them they never go wrong customer service is fantastic they're the best customer service any car I've ever had nice and they're like they're flashy but they're not impressing a rapper you know what I mean you don't know what type of rapper though yeah that's true right it was like yeah like de la soul they're probably impressed They lost all even, you know, young Jeezy might be like, look at the looks.

[1097] You know what I did this week?

[1098] I, uh, I donated some money to Red Cross for the Houston thing.

[1099] People get mad at you for that.

[1100] And then I remembered right away about the Red Cross shit.

[1101] Yeah.

[1102] It was like a knee -jerk donation.

[1103] I donated to the Houston Food Bank also.

[1104] But then I remembered about the shit with how they handled the Haiti funds and Katrina.

[1105] And then I emailed because it was through Amazon payments.

[1106] I was like, hey, can I get that money back, please?

[1107] I want to just give it to some other sources.

[1108] Oh, did you really?

[1109] I haven't got a response to it, but it was just a, it was one of the weirdest, now top 10 weird emails I've sent.

[1110] Well, I asked for a donation back.

[1111] Yeah, that's slippery, right?

[1112] I want it back, though, because I don't, because they are, I think it would be better for some some organizations on the ground.

[1113] This is one, Texas, the Texas diaper, because everybody, they need diapers.

[1114] And they're based in San Antonio.

[1115] So you can just send, I just went on Amazon and just sent a grand worth of diapers just because that made me feel good because it's super specific and you can't really get too fraudulent with diapers.

[1116] That's a good way of looking at it.

[1117] Like with product, you just send the product.

[1118] I mean, worst case scenario, somebody steals it.

[1119] But for the most part, if you send in a helpful product, that money, that shit's getting broken up.

[1120] Some of that shit go on to the mortgage.

[1121] Some of that shit go into, like, ink.

[1122] Yeah, it's weird because I guess effective charities have operating costs.

[1123] There's no way around.

[1124] People have to get paid.

[1125] People have to get paid.

[1126] You have to pay for logistics and planning.

[1127] And the Red Cross obviously does a lot of good.

[1128] There's no doubt they do a lot of good.

[1129] And people just get mad.

[1130] the accounting thing like how much of the money goes like right you know on it we donated money to the red cross for um harvey for hurricane harvey and uh people were like yeah the fucking red cross is a terrible place to donate money and like okay you want to say that right people want to say that yeah what what's the best thing to donate money i'd like to know what the best thing to donate for like harvey is i think there's um i did houston food bank i did that texas diaper thing Houston Food Bank sounds like a good one.

[1131] Jay J .J. Watt has one, the guy he plays for the Houston, Texas.

[1132] There's a few other ones that are on the ground and in Houston or in the area where Red Crosses, you know.

[1133] I mean, obviously, I know they have people on the ground, but it's pretty general.

[1134] Yeah, they handle a lot of different things.

[1135] But they do a lot of good, too.

[1136] like there's no denying that the Red Cross does a lot of good but it's it's that whole accounting thing like people get mad it's funny man there's a lot of people just waiting to get mad at something even get mad at where you're donating your money well i think it's just i think the issue more is that from the little research i did on it that red cross hasn't had full transparency right with how like i think people want to know if you give a dollar to red cross cross what percentage goes to this what percentage goes to this what percentage goes to this yeah and i don't think they offer that and that makes people feel like they're getting shy to do you think that's because they've been around so long the like red cross has been around for like how many years like a hundred years probably something right and like wasn't until the internet came along that these questions even came up but that people demanded transparency probably on a regular basis i think it's just because they haven't been that many results from the haiti earthquake where people don't see tangible results and I know I donated a bunch on the phone texting to you know I don't know if White Clef was doing Ray Cross think of he was doing something separate but I texted a lot just donate when that happened and so I think it's just when people don't see results for their money it's just like you know they want to be especially if you just try to help something and I think that's what makes it worse for people where if you try to help and you donate the money and you don't really see the results of it.

[1137] Then you're like, what the fuck?

[1138] Yeah, the Haiti things, it's almost like the infrastructure was so fucked up and there was so much damage done down there that you would need untold billions of dollars to fix everything.

[1139] It's like when you donate millions, it's like you barely even going to see any results.

[1140] I wonder how much damage was actually done to hate.

[1141] You've got to wonder about Houston.

[1142] I mean, they're talking about Houston being just catastrophic to the point where, Some places are never going to recover.

[1143] It's pretty messed up, man. It's raining there right now.

[1144] It's still raining.

[1145] And they were saying how, I was about how the constant development that they've been doing there was part of the reason why the flood it hit harder because they developed on prairie grass or certain land where this land might have soaked.

[1146] up.

[1147] Some of that, I mean, it probably would have still flooded, but it might have been less severe if there weren't in these acres and acres of new development.

[1148] Yeah, I saw that where they're saying that by paving over these areas, those areas can no longer absorb the water.

[1149] But it seems like you're talking about, did you ever see the graphic that shows the difference between the amount of water that rained down on Hurricane Katrina versus the amount of water that rained down so far on Harvey, not even including today?

[1150] And it's going to rain apparently tomorrow, too, I think.

[1151] It's so much more water than Katrina.

[1152] Look at the difference.

[1153] 14 to 15 trillion gallons as of August 28th.

[1154] And what is today?

[1155] The 29th?

[1156] The 30th?

[1157] Today's the 30th.

[1158] So that's two days ago of rain.

[1159] And then Katrina's only 6 .5 trillion gallons.

[1160] I mean, that's amazing.

[1161] I mean, I'm sure it's people that dedicate their lives to this, but how do you count that?

[1162] They're out there with scoops and shit, measuring.

[1163] Brulus and Cubic Come on man How do you know Gala's?

[1164] Come on man Beyond like oil drums You really Come on How do you really know It definitely looks like a lot And I hope Seems like a lot of water Is all right Yeah well you know One of the things that I love About tragedies Is when people come together And help each other out And one of things is there was a line Of fishing boats Of dudes pulling fishing boats To go and rescue people It was like a whole line on the highway of dudes with trucks pulling fishing boats and they were dropping them off and they were driving their boat, rather, riding their boat down these flooded roads and rescuing people and bringing them to safety.

[1165] That kind of shit makes me so happy.

[1166] That's one of the fucked up things about people.

[1167] It's like sometimes a bad thing makes people see the good in people.

[1168] It makes people do good things.

[1169] Definitely.

[1170] But how insane of just a juxtaposition does it have to be to, like you in your crib just watching a show on Sunday relaxing or whatever, you know, Friday and then a few days later, you have to be saved by boat from this place where you usually just walk out and get the mail.

[1171] Yeah.

[1172] You have to, somebody has to pull up with.

[1173] the boat that's insane they say this is a once every 500 year storm too but how the fuck do they know that 500 years ago people wrote shit down on bark you know they they scratched they showed like rain drops and skulls what is that people of a jet ski in their house saved her with a jet ski wow um that's yes my friend's grandmother being jet skied out of her living room in Houston what about y 'all though wow that house is fucked There's a lot of fucked houses The other thing about Houston, too, is Houston is so damp Like Houston in the summertime is so moist It means they're going to have crazy mold growth Their mold is going to be off the charts And that shit makes people sick as fuck Like I've had a friend in Austin His house had to be gutted Because he was getting sick And they couldn't figure out what was wrong And they came in and did some sort of a test of the air And they're like, dude, your house is infested And so they broke down his walls and apparently there was some pipe leakage or something inside the wall and then just the general moisture of the air the entire walls were filled with this black mold and it was getting everybody sick.

[1174] Shit, that shit is gross.

[1175] Yeah, mold is no joke, man. That black mold stuff can really fuck you up.

[1176] If you're feeling shitty and your house has mold in it, you've got to do something about that because there's something going on there.

[1177] You're literally being poisoned by your house.

[1178] Damn.

[1179] That Tom Likis dude had that.

[1180] that going on too in LA he had to get his house gutted he uh he was feeling sick for like a year and then finally did something about it found out his house is filled with molds they they tear it down to the to the raw frame of the house and have to spray everything with this antifungal shit and redo the whole house again shit how long was he out of house like over a year how would it just says it says it's what's something i'm reading a little article on it says it uh black mold yeah Yeah, it just said it really hit his voice hard, fucked up his health.

[1181] It's no joke, man. I mean, you're breathing in these little organisms.

[1182] I mean, spores are these little, when you're thinking about mold, it's like a fungus, right?

[1183] Wouldn't you consider mold a fungus?

[1184] Is that what it is?

[1185] Spores, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think so.

[1186] That shit is in the air, and it's poison.

[1187] So you're basically breathing in, like, toxic poison all the time.

[1188] Yeah.

[1189] The shit is, just, I couldn't imagine that shit, man. To you living in Chicago, you don't care about winters, doesn't bother you?

[1190] You can live anywhere.

[1191] I work around it.

[1192] Work around it.

[1193] So in the wintertime, you're like, yeah, Hannibal's not in town.

[1194] Doing gigs in Florida.

[1195] Yeah, I book myself like that during the winter in Cali and Arizona, Texas, Florida, et cetera.

[1196] And then if I do a run and I'm scheduled to come back, but I don't have any actual thing to do in Chicago that I need to be there for.

[1197] I check the weather.

[1198] And if that shit's like under 25, then I just chill where I'm at.

[1199] Just, I just, I just, I look and like, that's crazy.

[1200] And I call down to the front desk and say, extend for two days, please.

[1201] Oh, that's a good move.

[1202] And you just hang out wherever you at.

[1203] Just hang out wherever I'm, or go to some other warm place for a couple.

[1204] That's how, I mean, this is my first time being back for, full winter.

[1205] So that's how I handled it this time.

[1206] Where I would just stay out.

[1207] You're living the life.

[1208] It's nice, man. You're living a nice life.

[1209] I rent my place out.

[1210] It's a apartment building.

[1211] I rent it out when I'm not there.

[1212] Do you really?

[1213] Oh, you are frugal.

[1214] You have people living in your house?

[1215] Do you know these people?

[1216] No. Wow.

[1217] Airbnb.

[1218] I don't have like stuff stuff there.

[1219] I'm pretty bare bones when I travel and shit.

[1220] Just a few t -shirts, jeans, a couple things.

[1221] So your apartment in Chicago, you don't keep a lot of shit there?

[1222] I keep just the basic stuff TV and whatever you need if you're a traveling person if you be there.

[1223] Wow.

[1224] And then I stay, when I get back, it's three of them, I stay in whichever one is open.

[1225] I block out a couple days.

[1226] Oh, you rent, you have three apartments?

[1227] Yeah.

[1228] It's in one building, yeah.

[1229] That's weird.

[1230] Three apartments in one building?

[1231] Why did you decide to do that?

[1232] Because it was a, I mean, I got it as an investment property.

[1233] I plan on getting a separate place to stay in, but that's where I stay now is when I'm there, because I'm not that.

[1234] much that's a slick move do i sound like a weird crazy cheap person right now you sound weird i wouldn't say cheap because you do have a seven hundred dollar watch i would say frugal frugal's the right way to approach this yeah yeah why not why not why not why not i mean having them sitting around not not not generating any income doesn't do anybody any good absolutely not i think it would drive me crazy yeah so you're doing the right thing it's uh it's uh it's all right man I was at this festival called Afro Punk in New York It's a music festival And it's just a beautiful festival It's all black artists And it's great And people dress up in The wildest outfits It's a fun time I met the people that put it on I met them a few years back They used to come to my show at Knitin Factory In Brooklyn Jocelyn and Matthew and dope people and so backstage chilling I was there with a friend somebody introduced me to this lady she says oh I she has you know industry job oh I work here and blah blah blah we love to have you in and I say sure you know that sounds that sounds good I'd like to do it sounds it sounded like an interesting thing to do and so she has me her phone and I put in my email and my assistant's email and then give her the phone back and she was like you're not going to give your number like that's i take that as a sign of disrespect i'm an o g in this game and i was i was super high at this point and i'm like what is happening right now she took it as a sign of disrespect that you didn't give her your number yeah because i guess she deals with lots of famous people or some shit so the fact that i just gave her emails she just i never met i met this woman uh nine 90 seconds prior to this part of the internet.

[1235] It was so, and I'm like, what it?

[1236] And I was so high too.

[1237] Well, I'm like, is this really happening right now?

[1238] I really wanted to work with you, and I just gave you the info to get in touch with me. Yeah, why do we have to talk on the phone?

[1239] That's less effective.

[1240] It was suit.

[1241] And so I'm like, what is that?

[1242] And then so she goes on about that.

[1243] She went on about it for how long?

[1244] Not that long.

[1245] But then she tried to continue the conversation.

[1246] after it's obvious that her vibe has changed.

[1247] Well, I was in a, she went from like, hey, what was I a lot today?

[1248] Yeah, to a very dry.

[1249] Oh, so.

[1250] Oh, wow.

[1251] And so she continued the conversation.

[1252] That's not good.

[1253] In this kind of dry, weird way.

[1254] Well, she said, oh, so you're about to go on this tour with Nage and Lauren Hill?

[1255] How do you approach the shows differently?

[1256] But it's obvious that she's just kind of asking it.

[1257] She's upset at you.

[1258] Yeah, and so I was, and so I didn't, I just answered it.

[1259] And then she pulls out her phone.

[1260] And she's like, oh, my friends over there.

[1261] And then she goes like this, like, norm.

[1262] And then I just said, all right, I'm out of here.

[1263] I just walked off somewhere else.

[1264] But then it was such a weird experience that the comedian in me was hoping she was doing some weird Andy Kaufman bit.

[1265] It was that intense?

[1266] It was just super weird because everybody was, everybody else was really chill I wasn't even having any networking discussions with people like that there and everybody else was really chill and I'm like talking to other people like is that?

[1267] Did that really happen?

[1268] So I saw her later like a couple hours later I said Was it, were you doing a bit?

[1269] Was that a joke?

[1270] And then she tried to play it like she was like I had to check you Like check me for what?

[1271] I gave you my And so but she was really into collecting people.

[1272] That's what she's really into.

[1273] Yeah, also she was interacted with me based on who else she's dealt with in her past versus just interacting with me as an individual.

[1274] So she was just super salty and I was just so ironic that at this beautiful black festival the only person being weird backstage is a white woman in her 40s.

[1275] taking it as a sign of disrespect it was crazy you must have felt like as soon as she said that like oh this definitely was the right move not to give you my number because you're fucking crazy it was just more like I was wondering then after I was like it was mine like did because I sometimes I give I give random people my number all the time like random girls and shit I've given but I don't know what I don't know maybe something in my instinct you knew it just gave it to her but I've given people my email before too but I've given people my email before too but it was just, especially since I was super high, I was like, what the fuck is happening?

[1276] Well, see, the thing is for business, though, email is the best way to contact people.

[1277] Yeah, because you can, yeah, you can email somebody at three in the morning, it's nothing.

[1278] Well, yeah, not only that, like you can, like if you say, hey, we're trying to work out the logistics for this thing in February, between February 2nd and 4th, tell us your availability, so then you can sit in front of your computer and look at my calendar.

[1279] February 4's my birthday, actually.

[1280] Happy birthday.

[1281] Thanks, man. Look at that shit, and you can go, oh, okay, well, here's what I've got, and you could, it's clear.

[1282] more concerned having a conversation over the phone then i gotta remember i gotta write it down hold on let me get a piece of paper or let me dictate it into my phone like that's that's less effective yeah especially it was it was crazy fucking bitch but it's uh yeah it was insane man it's crazy people out there man i've i've met men and women that do that they want your number and if you don't want to give them your number they get upset well this reason why you're getting upset is the very reason why I don't want to give my number.

[1283] I don't want some...

[1284] We shouldn't be in each other's lives.

[1285] Yeah, you're too excited about getting my number.

[1286] If someone's that excited about getting your number, you shouldn't give them your number.

[1287] That's what I think.

[1288] Yeah, she started name -dropping and shit.

[1289] Fuck that.

[1290] As soon as they start name -dropping.

[1291] She named after the second time.

[1292] I've done stuff.

[1293] I've put on events for Obama.

[1294] Oh, yeah.

[1295] That's cool.

[1296] Call Obama right now.

[1297] Wake him up.

[1298] That's cool.

[1299] That's really great that you did that.

[1300] I've done events for Obama.

[1301] Did Obama give you his number?

[1302] You crazy asshole Like Obama's Giving out Yeah yeah text me anytime No matter what's going on With the 7 billion people in the world That I'm handling Yeah Well maybe she's a troll And she knew That she was becoming a podcast story Is she that I like to make people Sometimes I like to make people more calculated Than they are That's like some Illuminati shit That's like 3D shots I don't think so I don't think so I think she's just crazy lady Just a weird show business lady Yeah Just a crazy lady Yeah Have you like completely Move past all the Cosby shit Or do you still take grief for that Not grief No I've uh Well now you're vindicated I was I was I was never grief It was just where I would Be forced to talk about it in situations I didn't want to And also it came out The joke And that video came out right before we were starting the rollout from my Comedy Central TV show.

[1303] And we actually, people don't know, we pushed back my announcement because that news was that crazy that we pushed it back by maybe, we pushed it back.

[1304] The premiere announced by a month or two because it was that.

[1305] And so even though I had my Comedy Central deal in place, since 2012, I had an all -around Comedy Central deal.

[1306] And so then when I came out and then I got my show.

[1307] Well, then my show was scheduled to go on the air.

[1308] It looked like, oh, he did the Cosby joke, and then he got the TV show.

[1309] It's like, no, man, this is like my fourth development deal.

[1310] And this is finally the show that I got on.

[1311] Isn't that funny how things like that work?

[1312] Yeah.

[1313] But so that was, that was the thing where instead of, uh, instead of just having this show that I was able to, it was this energy around it, you know, in 2005, July, like, yeah, all early 2005.

[1314] It was this energy around it where if I was going to do press around that time, they were definitely going to, what year was it?

[1315] This was 2015, two years ago.

[1316] You said 2005, sorry, yeah, 2015.

[1317] And that show in Philly was October 2014.

[1318] So, yeah, it just kind of really affected the energy around it as far.

[1319] And my want and eagerness to do a lot of press just because I knew it was going to happen.

[1320] You know it was going to come up.

[1321] Yeah.

[1322] And it was just like, I was so that was that.

[1323] I'm not saying that that's the reason my show is not on anymore at all.

[1324] Just before people were like, your show sucked.

[1325] That's why I said.

[1326] Did you like doing the show?

[1327] I did like aspects of it.

[1328] I like the activity part of it where there's always something to do.

[1329] You know what I mean?

[1330] If you, like if you're the face of a show, you got to write, you got to edit, you got to get the writers to do stuff, you got to, you know, deal with costumes.

[1331] And it's always a task to do.

[1332] So I like just the, that I know for that, whatever, what four months three four month period i was never bored during that time during when i do movies i'm hella bored yeah yeah i would like movies just because it's no you just sit around and you go say some stuff it's like baseball it's absolutely baseball it's absolutely baseball if you talk about a 12 hour day that you spend on a movie shoot is actually for me 45 minutes an hour of actual acting and shit and I mean well with me maybe 10 minutes of actual acting because I'm not a good actor at all I'm just saying words but yeah this shit is just mind normally boring but the finished product is cool to see and it's dope to be a part of but when doing it the director has a lot to you know he's moving around and he got a lot of shit to do and so he might yet but yeah doing Man, that shit is boring.

[1333] It's very boring.

[1334] There's no other way to do it, though, it seems like.

[1335] It's always that way.

[1336] I think it depends on the budget of it.

[1337] When they got money to burn, then they got time to burn also.

[1338] But if you're doing an indie movie, then they're going to keep that shit moving.

[1339] But then, yeah, if you're doing a...

[1340] I did this one movie Band of Robbers that's on Netflix.

[1341] And it was just, you know, we were active on that.

[1342] It's Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, but in real time, like in current time.

[1343] Yeah, so I did that.

[1344] And that was, you know, did a few scenes and that, but it was quick.

[1345] It was no wasted days, you know.

[1346] Sometimes you go to a movie set.

[1347] They go, yeah, get here at 9 o 'clock in the morning.

[1348] You get there, go through the whole shit, get your hair, makeup, get your clothes on, and sit around.

[1349] And just sit for a full.

[1350] I've sat for four days.

[1351] Yeah.

[1352] Like, four days and then did, like, what was the, what the fuck was the plan?

[1353] Yeah.

[1354] How did you?

[1355] They just want you there in case they get through a scene.

[1356] Wait, how did you not even do anything?

[1357] Were you, like, no, we're not going to, you're not, no, do you good for the day, for the whole, for the whole day.

[1358] Who planned this out?

[1359] Now, when you were doing your TV show, how many months you did it?

[1360] You said it did it for like four months?

[1361] Uh, eight episodes So it was two months of shooting And then a month Or a couple months of Pre -Pro Yeah And do you, you enjoyed it?

[1362] I did enjoy it I just, yeah, I enjoyed it I want to do a, I'll probably do something on TV next year again Do a show once I get the idea right And figure out exactly You think you do Comedy Central again?

[1363] Comedy Central needs a show They need something I'll do somewhere I'm gonna do what, you know, what the best choice is I had a good relationship over there still um but we'll see we'll see what it is it's so hard to do those things because you've got to deal with so many other people you've got so many different cooks in the kitchen executives all these different people hanging out of yeah that's that's one part I mean they were they were pretty chill they were they were they were it was it would be weird aspects and just weird things that you'll think you care about this it'll be a weird line Like, why do you give a shit about this line so much, but they'll let other shit go, but they'll sometimes give notes on something that seem pretty insignificant to me. Yeah, I think a lot of times they just want to justify their existence.

[1364] They want to justify their paycheck and have some sort of a point of view, even if it doesn't make any sense.

[1365] They just want to add to it.

[1366] Yeah.

[1367] Tweak it a little bit.

[1368] That was my idea.

[1369] You see what Hannibal took his head off and made that little nod?

[1370] That was my idea.

[1371] Yeah, conference calls is to work Because everybody feels the need to chime in on a call And I'm like, I've been on conference I'm like, why am I on this This call?

[1372] I don't know if I've had a I don't know if I had a conference call Where it just felt really good Like, where I was like, that was a good conference call Glad I did that shit.

[1373] Never.

[1374] I had a conference call once and I canceled a show.

[1375] I was supposed to do a comedy central stand -up special on the old regime and we had a conference call and they had like a transcript of my set and they were going over the material and they're like, well, you definitely can't talk about this and you can't say this and you can't say, we got like five minutes into the conversation.

[1376] I go, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

[1377] I'm out.

[1378] I go, I'm not doing this.

[1379] And they went, what?

[1380] I go, I'm not doing this.

[1381] I don't want to do this.

[1382] There's no way.

[1383] I go, you guys are butchering everything.

[1384] I go, this is my act.

[1385] You know what my act is you want to cut things out and change things and you like there's no way this is not happening and you just bailed yeah I said thank you though appreciate it and then did they they they were stunned there was a it was one of those stunned conversations like what I was like yeah I'm not doing this did they did they flip though no no way it was just a straight up well I was yeah I was like we're going somewhere else like this is crazy there's one of those conversations where they mean they were super resistant to controversy commercial shit.

[1386] This is a few years back.

[1387] I wish I could remember.

[1388] Late 90s?

[1389] No, no, 2005 -ish, six -ish.

[1390] I wound up doing actually a series on, I'm a special on Netflix that went to Showtime.

[1391] That was 2005.

[1392] So that's where I wound up doing it.

[1393] But the conversation on the phone was just like, what?

[1394] Like they were going over the material.

[1395] No, okay, we're going to have issue with this.

[1396] You can't say that.

[1397] You definitely can't say this.

[1398] I was like, this is just, Those, doing those specials on TV, it's such a bad idea anyway because they're always all broken up, you know?

[1399] Yeah.

[1400] It's, yeah, especially for stories, I did my first two with Comedy Central, and they were, they added it.

[1401] They broke up a story, a longer story in my second one, if I'm not mistaken.

[1402] But they're on Netflix now, and they're full.

[1403] But, yeah, they would, I mean, they got to, that's how they pay me is that they fucking sell.

[1404] Yeah.

[1405] Act's body spray.

[1406] I got to take another piss real quick.

[1407] I've been drinking too much water.

[1408] Drink four bottles of water.

[1409] You might be the new water champ.

[1410] It's not a shit outside too also today.

[1411] It is.

[1412] Like 110.

[1413] Yeah, it's crazy hot.

[1414] It's hot in here too.

[1415] It's so hot that I went running and it was burning the bottom of my feet through those five -finger shoes.

[1416] You know, I wear those really thin trail running shoes, those vibrams that everybody tells me are going to kill me. People act like you're going to die if you wear those things.

[1417] I tell people I'm wearing, Did you just get a class action lawsuit?

[1418] Don't you understand?

[1419] These things are terrible for you, bro.

[1420] They're not.

[1421] It's just your body is used to wearing a cast on your feet.

[1422] Listen, to everybody that's worried about those things, I swear if you just use those things and walk for a while and then like wear them a little bit and then eventually build up to running with them, you'll be fine.

[1423] But you have to strengthen your feet.

[1424] Neil Brennan said he got planter fasciitis from running on a treadmill with those things on.

[1425] Yeah, with those vibrant five -finger shoes.

[1426] Are those the ones that really stick to your feet?

[1427] They're webbing.

[1428] They're little toe shoes.

[1429] Yeah.

[1430] Yeah, I run with those.

[1431] And they're better for your feet.

[1432] It's like your foot has to be strong because most of the time when you're running, you're running with running shoes on.

[1433] Like, if you see, like, the average pair of running shoes, they have a thick heel.

[1434] And what happened is Nike, I think in the 70s, whenever they came out with these things, they literally changed the way people run.

[1435] because people started running and landing with their heel because that's where the big cushion is.

[1436] So it changed the gate, the natural human gate, and it put way more pressure on your knees and people started developing all these issues because of that.

[1437] The real way to run is supposed to, you're supposed to run on the forefoot, like landing on the ball of the foot and let the natural structure of your foot decelerate your stride.

[1438] That's what you're supposed to do.

[1439] But most people's feet are not conditioned for that because we wear these thick -ass sneakers everywhere and those things act as, It's like we're in a cast everywhere.

[1440] That's how it's been described to me. So over the last four or five months, I've been running with what they call minimalist shoes.

[1441] So there's almost no cushioning at all.

[1442] It's very thin.

[1443] And I was saying it's so hot out that I was running in these things and the bottom of my feet got hot.

[1444] Yeah.

[1445] Just from running on the ground.

[1446] The ground was so hot.

[1447] Was it starting to melt or something?

[1448] I could feel the heat through the bottom of my feet.

[1449] It was hurting.

[1450] It was actually like burning the bottom of my foot.

[1451] Which, by the way, people, if you have dogs, be super fucking careful your dogs outside.

[1452] Because if you're walking your dog on concrete, you can easily burn the shit out of your dog's paws.

[1453] Did you see this the other day?

[1454] I just, I looked a little bit into it.

[1455] They're painting different sections of asphalt, I guess, here with, I don't know if it's like white.

[1456] Yeah.

[1457] It's a heat absorbing color instead of like black asphalt because black asphalt apparently just absorbs the heat and reflects the heat.

[1458] And radiates it around.

[1459] Yeah.

[1460] This is dropping, like, 10 to 15 degrees almost immediately.

[1461] I was, right here, I got 12 degrees just after one coat.

[1462] Yeah, I've seen that.

[1463] That's amazing.

[1464] That's great.

[1465] Yeah.

[1466] As hot as I saw in the one article, but it was like 120 degrees.

[1467] It was getting some places like off Sunset Boulevard in L .A., like just in the middle of the day when it's like 85 outside, 90 degrees outside.

[1468] Makes sense.

[1469] It's really, really extra hot.

[1470] Yeah, totally makes sense.

[1471] Yeah.

[1472] And all of L .A.'s asphalt, basically, too.

[1473] Yeah.

[1474] Paint that shit, stupid.

[1475] Yeah.

[1476] This would change maybe, maybe a little bit on your phone.

[1477] feet?

[1478] Yeah.

[1479] But you're running on dirt?

[1480] I'm running on dirt.

[1481] I'm running on hills.

[1482] But it was so hot.

[1483] It was the first time it's ever like burn the bottom of my feet.

[1484] Like I could feel it.

[1485] It was hot.

[1486] I was like, Jesus.

[1487] I'm not a, I don't really jog, but I'm a good judge of form.

[1488] Are you?

[1489] I judge people's like a running court, coach.

[1490] I don't know if I could coach, but I could just, I could definitely tell you when you're wrong.

[1491] Because I see some people like, mm -hmm, too heavy -footed.

[1492] Heavy -footed's bad.

[1493] Most people are running on their heels I see people running and I'm like wow It's crazy when you look around too You look around how many people are wearing shoes With elevated heels you're like wow That's kind of nuts It's kind of nuts how many people just got accustomed To wearing those kind of sneakers are running People are running basketball shoes or something too And that's like you probably shouldn't be doing that I think you'd be better off with that Than you are with running shoes Just don't land that way Just don't land on your heel If you land on the ball your feet basketball shoes I think should be fine but what the fuck do I know but you know I'm running with some really I run only with those five -finger shoes now or with I wear these morels too they're called vapor or something or another like they're real thin too minimalist do people ever try to you're running but people probably still will attempt to stop you while you jog right yeah but I don't you can't you can't that's so that's so crazy like I'm in the middle you're literally going to interrupt a workout it's like I've had people come up to me when I'm on a treadmill before.

[1494] Like, hey man, can I get a photo with you?

[1495] Like, definitely not now.

[1496] People do it if a mouth full of food.

[1497] You could be eating food.

[1498] I was cutting food up for my daughter, and this lady asked me for a picture.

[1499] I was like, are you crazy?

[1500] I'm feeding my kid.

[1501] This is just, people just don't give a fuck.

[1502] They want to adorn their Facebook with someone that they saw on TV once.

[1503] It's weird, man. Not even printing it up.

[1504] They don't care.

[1505] Not even really printing it usually Well they don't even want it that much It's just like they have a phone And like it's like if you have a gun You want to pull the trigger You have a phone you want to take a picture Like how many people do you see At the 4th of July taking videos of fireworks You are never going to watch that fucking video Who the hell is going to watch a fireworks video Like how sad does your life have to get Where you don't have anything better to do Than be sitting there watching little lights go off On your four inch screen Ooh.

[1506] Hey, man. Airport layoffs are real, dog.

[1507] Is that what you do?

[1508] When you're sitting there, a layover, you watch.

[1509] You know, the person that did it, you know, when you, like, say you got to layover in Salt Lake City, you delayed about five hours.

[1510] You should go through your videos and delete all the fireworks ones.

[1511] Yeah, just do some clean it up.

[1512] Yeah, you're eating up a lot of gigabytes.

[1513] You are.

[1514] When you look at it, you realize how much bullshit is on there.

[1515] Do you put shit in the cloud?

[1516] yeah do you do I shouldn't know I know even when I do it I mean but it's nothing too too risque there's a couple of risque things up there but my face isn't in there that's one thing that's one real oh dick no face would you uh I was thinking I asked a friend this yesterday would you like let's say Amazon started a Gmail competitor would you just like not just jump over but like wouldn't it be a good thing maybe to just start fresh with all your email and be like ah what do I need that's 20 years old in my email or 15 years old shit?

[1517] Oh yeah for sure.

[1518] Get it out of here.

[1519] I don't want it.

[1520] I don't want to see it.

[1521] I definitely, if I look at my email on a daily basis, nine out of ten things I get are bullshit.

[1522] Nine out of ten.

[1523] One out of ten I need and those people, I would just give my new email address anyway.

[1524] Like Ari did that pretty recently.

[1525] Ari just changed his email.

[1526] I'm like, it's a good move.

[1527] I change your phone.

[1528] I changed my phone.

[1529] That's a good move too.

[1530] Having more than one phone is a good move too.

[1531] Having a phone for people like that fucking lady at that thing Wanted your number I got that phone I just don't know that number by heart I got two other numbers I don't know him by heart Yeah I just remembered my number right now by heart And I'm about to change it again Yeah Yeah just I like not knowing it though I don't care As you know what else I like too I like that my vision is going So I can't read things So like when I if I get like an email or something like that Like I can go what does it say Okay whatever And you can use that.

[1532] I don't feel compelled to, like, read the whole thing.

[1533] I don't feel compelled to put my reading glasses and go into depth.

[1534] I just look at it to get a quick glance.

[1535] Don't need to pay attention to this?

[1536] That's just some bullshit.

[1537] Yeah.

[1538] Think about some important things.

[1539] That's like old man flakiness.

[1540] I can't see that shit.

[1541] I can't see shit.

[1542] What?

[1543] What is that?

[1544] No, whatever.

[1545] What's that fucking newspaper?

[1546] It's a goddamn game on.

[1547] Yeah.

[1548] I don't give a fuck.

[1549] I'm practicing not giving a fuck.

[1550] I've always been good at it, but I'm, like, actively working on it harder and harder more now than ever.

[1551] It's tough, especially if you're in your, if you're thinking about, it's tough not to not give a fuck, but also be very aware and thinking about things all the time where you have to, you, if you're saying you don't give a fuck, you do give a fuck because you're making the choice to be like, I don't give a fuck, but you still do give a fuck.

[1552] You're just like, I'm not going to react in a way as somebody that gives a fuck, but I give a fuck, I'm making a choice, though.

[1553] You know what it's like?

[1554] It's like I'm pretending I don't give a fuck by saying I don't give a fuck.

[1555] I'm like putting that out there.

[1556] I'm like making a conscious decision to not give a fuck.

[1557] But in doing so, I'm giving a fuck about not giving a fuck, which means you give a fuck.

[1558] You know who don't give a fuck?

[1559] Who?

[1560] Locksmiths.

[1561] Why is that?

[1562] They don't get locksmith confidence out?

[1563] Well, I don't think of a fuck.

[1564] Because they can open any door?

[1565] Because they can open any door and you call them about the lock.

[1566] I mean, I guess they have to eyeball it and see what it is.

[1567] but I called, like I was locked out in New York and I say you come through and I'll be there and tell them that I'll be there in five minutes.

[1568] What's the price?

[1569] I'll let you know when I'm there.

[1570] Like that's confidence to be like, I'm going to tell you when I'm there because you need to get into your place.

[1571] That's true.

[1572] And yeah.

[1573] And so I've, I've sent locksmiths away just as an active.

[1574] Too much money?

[1575] Just as an act of aggression, yeah.

[1576] Well, he was like, it's this much.

[1577] And I was, like, trying to talk him down, and he wasn't having it.

[1578] And he was like, so, and I was like, it's fine, dog.

[1579] It's all good.

[1580] And I just sat in my hallway for, I think I went to the bar, a couple doors down, just called a lot of locksmith.

[1581] How much did you save?

[1582] Not worth that time, but it was good for my spirit.

[1583] It felt good.

[1584] Now, did you get a vibe off that dude?

[1585] Like, you sort of had a vibe off that lady.

[1586] He didn't want to give her your number?

[1587] There's like a vibe off a dude.

[1588] It's just, I think it's just because I just see how quick they can do it.

[1589] And I'm like, I could do that in, you know, they do it in maybe 20, 30 seconds sometimes.

[1590] I'm like, I can learn how to do it in the five -minute version of that, how fast they do it.

[1591] And so it makes me, when I see how they do it, it pisses me off to know that he can just break my shit at any time and that he's just charging me an arbitrary price because this market is kind of.

[1592] you know all over the place yeah well i guess they have a skill and they should be paid for that absolutely right so like what do you remember how much money it was uh i don't know 150 let's say 150 oh how to just give them the money i don't i'm i'm probably yeah but you like like you you you got an enjoyment out of saying no yeah because i think he yeah i think he's used to my He'll be like, sure.

[1593] And I'm like, you know what?

[1594] You got this skill.

[1595] You can break into people's houses and shit.

[1596] I've seen people do this shit fast.

[1597] And I'm not having it.

[1598] I live on a block.

[1599] I live on a block with a, I'm not in a suburban area.

[1600] My block in Brooklyn and Williamsburg, I got one of the most lit blocks.

[1601] A lot of shit to do.

[1602] It's just, yeah, it's like four bars just on my very block.

[1603] I got time to kill.

[1604] Went down to my local and played some ski ball.

[1605] Hung out.

[1606] Hmm.

[1607] Yeah.

[1608] Why not?

[1609] How much did you offer to take off?

[1610] I don't remember the specifics of the negotiation, but it was a very nominal amount that meant nothing.

[1611] Yeah, and he wasn't really budgeting and shit.

[1612] Yeah, it was just, yeah.

[1613] Insighted to the mind of Hannibal Burris.

[1614] That's how my dad was.

[1615] Three apartments, rents him out with an Airbnb, $700 watch, big spend, no car.

[1616] No car.

[1617] Won't pay for a locksmith.

[1618] Hmm.

[1619] We'll pay for a locksmith.

[1620] I did pay for a locksmith.

[1621] Oh, but not that one.

[1622] Not that one.

[1623] Yeah.

[1624] How much do you think you saved on the second locksmith?

[1625] Not much, man. But drink money.

[1626] I had some drinks at that bar.

[1627] So, yeah, 20, 30 bucks.

[1628] Hmm.

[1629] Yeah.

[1630] I kicked in my door once.

[1631] Didn't have my lock.

[1632] Didn't have my key.

[1633] Were you with the family or was just you?

[1634] No, I was by myself.

[1635] Oh.

[1636] When I was pre -cell phone days.

[1637] Oh, okay.

[1638] I thought.

[1639] Front kicked.

[1640] the shit out of that door and call the dude yeah it's like what happened it's like yeah i didn't have my key he had to fix the door jam the whole thing that it's that little metal thing that was all bent and fucked up it's amazing how easy it is to kick open the door like when you see those dudes like banging their shoulder against the door if you got a solid front kick there's no way that door they just open unless it's a pull for you door if it's a pull forward door you're fucked like you got to be able to kick through the door like you have a hard kick you have a hard kick but a push open door super easy they just open up you know you said you were solo when you did it but I just still have a locked image of your family with you while you kick up in the door and the kids like yeah well if they were crying if they were crying I would I kicked open the door once on the set of news radio and we blamed on the band Anthrax oh it wasn't it wasn't part of a scene it was just you were it was a door to the break room.

[1641] We were drunk, and I was with Mora, Mora Tierney, and she was like, God, I'm fucking hungry.

[1642] I want to get in that break room.

[1643] And I'm like, I can get in that door.

[1644] And she's like, how are you getting that door?

[1645] I go, I'd have to kick it open.

[1646] She goes, you can kick open that door.

[1647] I go, yeah.

[1648] And she goes, do it.

[1649] I go, all right, here we go.

[1650] But boom, I just kicked the shit out of that door.

[1651] It bent the fucking, all of the shit that, like, works inside the door.

[1652] Yeah.

[1653] But it was so worth it.

[1654] Wait, is this?

[1655] Very shady, though, to blame it on that band.

[1656] It was wrong.

[1657] They were working on the set that week They were on the episode with us This day Is this a NBC Universal?

[1658] I think we're on Sunset Gower at the time I just think I just stomped the hole in that door That's a big old metal door too Did you use to act drunk?

[1659] Yeah, those guys Sometime?

[1660] Did you do some scenes drunk?

[1661] No, no, this was after the episode It had been done Wow, that's how pixelated is that Yeah, that's them on the...

[1662] They're cool guys though I hope production didn't call them because we just we were like who you know they were like who fucked up the door like who knows and they're like probably that fucking band like hmm probably if I would guess it was that band we just fucked up a door for like $10 and potato chips yeah I was wondering what the what the take was just some chips you know snack foods whatever was available it felt good in the moment oh did just that be able to do that feels amazing yeah to be able to kick a door open My buddy, Azar, gave me this tip about when he goes to the movies, he just orders a kid's ticket.

[1663] And because the people taking the tickets, they don't look.

[1664] Really?

[1665] They just look at the theater number in the movie.

[1666] Right.

[1667] And what?

[1668] I did it the first time.

[1669] And it was two tickets.

[1670] We were saving four bucks or whatever for and some change.

[1671] But it felt amazing.

[1672] It felt like a mini heist You know?

[1673] Really?

[1674] Yeah, it felt really good It's like, yeah Kids ticket Don't look Don't look, don't look We're good Yeah, the girl didn't want to do that shit She was like Why are you doing this?

[1675] Oh, you're with a girl Yeah, yeah That's a problem Can't do that with a girl Yes, you can't You just showed them who you are This is me I am Unreasonably cheap Yeah This is who I am We're seeing a movie together You're setting the stage too So like when that pre -nup comes She understands Yeah It was fine She's not going to go, I can't believe you brought a pre -nup.

[1676] Yeah.

[1677] She's like, of course, you know me. I cheat at the movie theater.

[1678] I pretend to be a kid for four bucks.

[1679] Exactly.

[1680] But that four bucks, that sends you, you know, sends your brain into a great place.

[1681] That's something that a lot of women really get upset by.

[1682] What?

[1683] Cheapness.

[1684] Yo.

[1685] I, uh, I was actually, I was out with this girl in Atlanta.

[1686] And we, uh, We went to this club.

[1687] She was driving, and we park in this parking lot.

[1688] It's like one of those situations where you park in a parking lot.

[1689] It was a dentist's office, but now somebody's charging for it.

[1690] And so my immediate question, you know, like five bucks for the parking spot, right?

[1691] But my immediate question is, does he, is it, do they have a deal with this dentist's office?

[1692] Or do they just charge at night for people to park in this dentist's off?

[1693] Because I'm like, you're not the dentist.

[1694] Why can you?

[1695] come up and I was telling her I told her that I was going to say that before we got out the car I was like I'm gonna ask him if he's the dentist I'm not going and she was like ha ha ha and then we get out and I was like you're not the dentist she was like what the fuck is going on she was upset that you actually did it yeah and so I was really about to be like what's the chances of it getting told like I was really not because of it I think the cheapness was a part of it but it was genuinely I wanted to know the reality of situation right and did they explain to you no I just she was getting upset and I just paid the five dollars she got real upset not really upset but enough where she wasn't we didn't have the same sense of humor and frugality where she we went on the same wavelength as far as that interaction so she wasn't rolling with me that drives a lot of women crazy when we find out that you're cheap yeah yeah it was you're supposed to be bold like that's one thing that women like they like they like when dudes make it rain, right?

[1696] You're throwing a bunch of money in the air?

[1697] You don't give a fuck.

[1698] There's something about that that, like, it's exciting.

[1699] I don't know about that.

[1700] Strip was like that, but...

[1701] Average women won't like that, right?

[1702] That's true.

[1703] Yeah, yeah, it's...

[1704] But it's a male move.

[1705] Like, to make it rain in a strip club is a total male move, right?

[1706] It's a saying that you don't give a fuck about money.

[1707] It's just chuck it up in the air.

[1708] Whoa!

[1709] It's a shit.

[1710] I mean, it's a lot behind that.

[1711] I haven't bawled out in the strip club like that.

[1712] I think the most I've spent.

[1713] spent in the night in the strip club is maybe 800, something like that.

[1714] Which in Atlanta is, I spent two months in Atlanta this summer.

[1715] That's pretty lowly.

[1716] You know, there's some guys that go and just have 10 grand.

[1717] Such this rapper spent 20 grand in the strip club, which is shocking and frightening to me. Yeah, Atlanta's famous for that, right?

[1718] Yeah.

[1719] It's great strip clubs in Atlanta.

[1720] I was just there.

[1721] I was there Friday.

[1722] It was at the Tabernacle.

[1723] Yeah.

[1724] It's a fun time, man. It's a fun city, man. It's a very fun city.

[1725] It's a good night life.

[1726] But yeah, the strip club where it's a spectacle.

[1727] You know what I mean?

[1728] So you just, I mean, it's fun.

[1729] But I went there a few times.

[1730] Who's throwing money?

[1731] Who's that?

[1732] 21 Savage.

[1733] It's 21 Savage.

[1734] It's Young Thug.

[1735] They're on the stage.

[1736] Maybe they did a song or something.

[1737] But it's just throwing money on everybody.

[1738] See, it's just...

[1739] But that is a thing.

[1740] It's a thing.

[1741] The flamboyance of not worrying at all about money to the point where you just throw it up in the air.

[1742] Yeah.

[1743] As a boxing ring.

[1744] There's a girl with boxing gloves on.

[1745] That might be King of Diamonds.

[1746] You don't want a box on paper.

[1747] Oh, it's Atlanta.

[1748] It's Atlanta.

[1749] It's just slip around.

[1750] Yeah, in Summer Strip Clubs, they have girls boxing.

[1751] What?

[1752] King of Diamers in Miami.

[1753] What?

[1754] I went there.

[1755] once on a Monday they have girls boxing really it's a huge strip club I don't like my strip clubs huge and overwhelmed I like my strip clubs kind of like dive bars like a certain strip clubs if you walk in and you throw up a couple hundred dollars like you can kind of take over the energy of the place uh like all the strippers are starting coming to you and shit at a small place at a smaller place king of diamonds that's like where Rick Ross hangs out like, yeah, Mayweather threw something there like you see that.

[1756] Kimu Diamond's Memorial weekend.

[1757] It has a basketball court.

[1758] I think we talked about strip clubs last time we were here.

[1759] Did we?

[1760] It happens.

[1761] Yeah, they have a basketball court in there and a barbershop in the strip club.

[1762] What?

[1763] Yeah.

[1764] A barbershop and a basketball court?

[1765] Why do they have a basketball court?

[1766] Because sometimes before you want to just get your, you know, endorphins going before you throw out of money, I guess, or maybe the strippers like to play basketball.

[1767] I don't know.

[1768] Weird.

[1769] But it's, uh...

[1770] The music is great.

[1771] That's a weird strip club, too, because the girls wore clothes.

[1772] What's going on?

[1773] I think this is the preamble.

[1774] I think this is the YouTube version.

[1775] Oh, I see.

[1776] They're getting warmed up.

[1777] You want to go to Vimeo, you can see the, uh, the real deal.

[1778] Oh, does Vimeo show nudity?

[1779] Yeah.

[1780] You know, what's interesting is, what's the rules with Twitter?

[1781] Because I follow some porn stars And they show full on fucking I think that's it You could do it That's amazing Sometimes I forget that I follow Pornhub on Twitter And then I'll be scrolling through it It's just a gif of some just Some hard fucking Oh yeah Well it's a real problem if you leave your phone Around your kids grab it When they scroll through your feed They're like hey Scroll through the home feed They got it I mean They're gonna see it somehow how ass and dick just one of those animated gift files 15 seconds of ass and dick and like who it's amazing that they can have that on Twitter with the millions and millions and millions of like that doesn't bother them I mean this wears things on Twitter our president on a costume did you see that that woman Valerie I don't know how you say her name is Valerie Plam or plume or something like that She's the CIA operative that was outed by, I guess it was Dick Cheney, I think.

[1782] It was a big deal because she had said something or her husband had said something.

[1783] So Dick Cheney outed her and it compromised her position and compromised the mission she was working on.

[1784] Anyway, she's working now on buying Twitter to kick Donald Trump off.

[1785] Valerie Pl -A -M -E.

[1786] I do not know how to say her name.

[1787] She has that much money?

[1788] No. She's crowdfunding to buy Twitter to kick off.

[1789] Donald Trump.

[1790] She wants to buy Twitter just so they could kick Trump off.

[1791] One billion dollar gold?

[1792] She made 85 grand so far.

[1793] By the way, I got news for you honey.

[1794] Twitter's not for sale for a billion dollars.

[1795] And I try to buy Twitter for a billion.

[1796] That's nice.

[1797] Come back when you got about seven billion.

[1798] Get out of here, Valerie.

[1799] Give that money to Houston.

[1800] Fuck out of here.

[1801] You're not going to make it.

[1802] How much money do you think like how much money is Twitter worth?

[1803] Like if Twitter was going to be for sale.

[1804] It had to be for sale first.

[1805] It would have to be like 15 billion, right?

[1806] Probably.

[1807] It's insane.

[1808] It's not on potential, but yeah.

[1809] It's the thing with Twitter from the little bit that I know is that it, in comparison to the other social medias, they've had trouble monetize it in the same way.

[1810] So, like, Instagram is making money.

[1811] Facebook obviously making money, and Instagram's own body of Snapchat is doing well.

[1812] Twitter hasn't figured out how to get real revenue.

[1813] People use Twitter and are active on it and live tweet events.

[1814] But as far as the money, it hasn't been lagging in comparison.

[1815] I don't understand that.

[1816] Do you understand that?

[1817] That doesn't make sense to me. Like Instagram has sponsored tweets.

[1818] What would that say?

[1819] What are you putting up there?

[1820] The market value, $15 .7 billion for Twitter?

[1821] Yeah.

[1822] So why does that check think she can get it for a billion bucks?

[1823] She's tripping.

[1824] She's just trying to get attention, right?

[1825] Yeah, yeah.

[1826] That's crazy.

[1827] Well, you think that's just pure, just anger to come up with.

[1828] Anger.

[1829] Just anger, not just to have the initial weirdo, whack -a -doodle, not going to happen, I did.

[1830] But, because I've had a lot of those.

[1831] But they'll calm down.

[1832] Yeah.

[1833] But to go through, to be like, yeah, I would fucking do a crowd fund to buy Twitter.

[1834] That's so stupid.

[1835] And then to actually, like, go on.

[1836] to the site and then write it up.

[1837] Yeah.

[1838] Put your picture up there.

[1839] Yeah.

[1840] And then look at it.

[1841] Proof -read and go through all that shit and still be like, yeah.

[1842] Still crowdfund for Twitter.

[1843] Still be on board with the idea.

[1844] And they're like post.

[1845] It's so stupid because there's 350 million people in this country with every single person.

[1846] What's the matter?

[1847] She just wants to become the largest shareholder.

[1848] So she can make the decision to do that.

[1849] Which why the fuck would anybody give her that money?

[1850] You're giving her that money.

[1851] You're giving her that money like what if you gave her a hundred grand how do you do she give you an accounting form of what she's doing with that hundred grand that's so stupid no one's gonna die i can't believe she got 85 grand that's amazing in and of itself well the final number the end of that number is seven which means somebody gave like two dollars or one somebody gave a weird off number sure i don't have much but good luck yeah who's going to give more than five bucks let's look at the names because sometimes they show the names of people that they gave stuff and like what they said, and so let's just see.

[1852] Victoria needs, let's do this now.

[1853] And what else?

[1854] The way he tweets, like, look at that tweet.

[1855] We need to get this fool out of office and put him where he can't cause damage.

[1856] $5.

[1857] Look at that tweet that he made.

[1858] Look at that tweets.

[1859] Scroll back up, Jamie, to where it was before, so you can see Trump's tweet.

[1860] Look at that.

[1861] Military solutions are now fully in place, no space between comma and locked.

[1862] So typos galore, locked and loaded, no comma, I mean, comma, no space again.

[1863] Should North Korea act unwisely?

[1864] And then double space, the fuck that's about.

[1865] Hopefully, Kim Jong -un will find another path, exclamation point.

[1866] It's just, it's like, it's like you took some housewife from middle and nowhere and allowed her to be president.

[1867] I mean, it's literally like the mindset of that tweet.

[1868] It's a just silly tweet.

[1869] hopefully he'll find another path I mean Hopefully He's uh Is Are you disturbed I don't know if I'm even disturbed anymore If I'm kind of like Or if I'm numb in a Yeah In a kind of I don't know Like domestic situation Where I was just like yeah Domestic violence are you been beaten Yeah yeah That's yeah Like your wife That's what he said Yeah he went to Texas and like to see the flood damage it was like yeah good crowd big crowd that's what he like just where it's kind of what a crowd what a crowd here to see me right everybody yay no i don't think i'm disturbed i just i don't think it would i knew it would be bad i don't think it would be this bad get this bad this quick this quick and yeah it's really i don't know it's fascinating the thing that fascinates me the most is not just him but how many people still support him?

[1870] How many people don't have any problem with it?

[1871] Yeah, where I try to, I can't understand it really, where they still are behind, you're behind all of this?

[1872] Or is it just where they have a similar, just, are the people that are really into him, are they the same type of just egomaniac or a narcissist where they can't admit wrong or they know that it's wrong, but I can't I'm locked in now They're locked in I think they're finding a way To justify whatever he does No matter what it is Like I had Kamal Bell Yesterday on the podcast I didn't read I don't read comments on YouTube But I did look at the thumbs up Thumbs down And it's like He had as many thumbs down As thumbs up That's super rare And I think a lot of it Because he was talking a lot of shit About Trump We were both were We were talking about how ridiculous This is And I saw a couple of comments months on Twitter, people that got mad, because we were talking about his response to Charlottesville, and they were saying, he was saying on all sides, because there was violence on all sides.

[1873] Like, people showed up with torches.

[1874] They showed up with torches for white folks.

[1875] They were like, we're here for white folks only.

[1876] We have torches.

[1877] Like, you don't think that's an issue?

[1878] You don't think people showing up a line of crazy white supremacists with torches.

[1879] And the people that were opposing them the people that are opposing them yeah they fucked up too but the only reason why they were there is because there was people with torches right the whole thing is insane it's uh and he doesn't have the i mean he doesn't know how to handle it and also he can't say that publicly he can't say hey guys i'm panicking right now no you never say that but he can't say it explicitly but he kind of says it through his actions I don't think he's healthy.

[1880] Also, too, I think when you're 70 years old, like you were talking about, like, your brain gets older, you're 34, right?

[1881] I'm 50 now.

[1882] My brain's getting older, for sure.

[1883] What's it going to be like in 23 years?

[1884] What is he?

[1885] 71, 72, something like that?

[1886] What's that going to be like?

[1887] Not good.

[1888] I don't think you should be working all day.

[1889] Yeah.

[1890] The dude, uh, he's too old, and he's a crazy person.

[1891] And he used to host the apprentice, and he was on a Comedy Central roast.

[1892] Amongst other things.

[1893] So he still watches five hours of TV.

[1894] Not to say that those things I mean, you can't be solid at being president, but this guy...

[1895] You say he still watches five hours of TV a day?

[1896] Yeah, that's what I read yesterday.

[1897] Who reported that?

[1898] Rooters?

[1899] I don't mean, it's still...

[1900] Let's see what I find...

[1901] Reuters?

[1902] They're a bunch of fucking fake news.

[1903] How could anybody have time to watch five hours of TV a day if you have a real job?

[1904] This wasn't a brand -new article, Trump's TV obsession is a first.

[1905] Look that hair, hilarious.

[1906] Look at that.

[1907] They can just take a photo of his hair only and black everything out.

[1908] That is the most bizarre image of a president.

[1909] That crazy helmet of hair.

[1910] Yeah.

[1911] Got mixed it up.

[1912] Were you a photo editor?

[1913] It's a good move, actually.

[1914] Because, I mean, no president has consumed as much.

[1915] Hold on.

[1916] No president's confused as much television as the current one or reacted as quickly or directly to what they're seeing.

[1917] He loves Fox and Friends.

[1918] 6 .24 a .m. Monday.

[1919] Trump gushed over Twitter about the amazing reporting, in quotes, on the morning talk show.

[1920] A week earlier, he instructed the nation to, in parentheses, in quotes, watch Fox and Friends now for their exemplarily Russia coverage.

[1921] Exemplaryly Russia coverage.

[1922] He tweeted about the program hosted by Steve Dewey, Dookie, Doocy, how do you say that?

[1923] Yeah, Deucey.

[1924] Ducey?

[1925] Duky?

[1926] Duky?

[1927] Duky like poo.

[1928] Ainsley?

[1929] What are these people's names?

[1930] Ainsley, Earnhardt, and Brian Kilmead, seven times in March alone, and recently brought it up in an interview with Fox News, Tucker Carlson, telling him cheerfully, I like that group of three people.

[1931] Even after becoming president, Trump reportedly manages to fill his days with plenty of television, in quotes, and from his tweets it's often possible to discern when and what he's watching.

[1932] In January, Axios broke down the president's media diet.

[1933] Most mornings, Trump flicks on the TV and watches Morning Joe.

[1934] But he hates that guy now.

[1935] Not anymore.

[1936] Now he hates that guy, and he talks shit about his wife's plastic surgery.

[1937] Often for long periods of time, sometimes interrupted with text to the host or panelists.

[1938] He texts him.

[1939] After the 6 a .m. hour of Joe, he's often on to Fox and Friends by 7.

[1940] Follow -up show.

[1941] Wow.

[1942] With a little CNN before or after, just to fucking get the blood pressure up.

[1943] He also catches the Sunday show, especially meet the press.

[1944] The shows, as he calls them, often provoke his tweets.

[1945] The day of our interview with him, all of his tweet topics were discussed during the first two hours of Morning Joe.

[1946] Five hours of television every day, it says.

[1947] That's a guess.

[1948] God, not five a day.

[1949] But too much.

[1950] And also, it's weird that the...

[1951] Mr. President is easily baitable on Twitter, more so than me. Did you see when Stephen Colbert got him?

[1952] And then Colbert said, you know, Mr. President, as much as I think you're terrible, be the president, I thought at the very least you understood show business.

[1953] He goes, you responded to me. He goes, that means I won.

[1954] I got you.

[1955] Yeah.

[1956] You know, that was, when he called Trump's mouth a cockholster for Putin, Oh, that was a great joke.

[1957] It was a great joke.

[1958] But it's crazy, like, seeing that on a late -night talk show.

[1959] A late -night talk show on CBS, the hosts calls the president's mouth a cock -hoaster.

[1960] Oh, they didn't bleep cock?

[1961] I don't know what they did.

[1962] They probably bleeped it.

[1963] But you knew what it was.

[1964] Yeah.

[1965] A cockhole.

[1966] He's saying, a cock -ha -ha -ha.

[1967] You know what he's saying.

[1968] But the fact that that was in the monologue that CBS was like, yeah, go for it.

[1969] I mean, no other president.

[1970] You would never have that.

[1971] a million years.

[1972] The minimal amount of respect.

[1973] No FCC fine for Stephen Colbert's late night Donald Trump cockholster crack.

[1974] Wow.

[1975] Yeah, they bleeped it.

[1976] So was Trump trying to go after it for the FCC?

[1977] No, I don't know.

[1978] Do you remember when the FCC went after Howard Stern?

[1979] People forget about that shit.

[1980] He got fined, and he didn't even swear, he got fined hundreds of thousands of dollars.

[1981] Shit.

[1982] Yeah.

[1983] How do you think it ends?

[1984] Him?

[1985] You think he ends his term?

[1986] You think he dies in office?

[1987] You think he, uh, ODs, uh, you think he gets impeached?

[1988] Well, you think what happens with Trump?

[1989] It's a good question.

[1990] I don't think he gets a second term, but I could be wrong.

[1991] I think he makes it to the end of the term.

[1992] Really?

[1993] Yeah.

[1994] I think it's just how long wheels on a giant disaster and it gets worse.

[1995] and worse and I think here's the thing that Howard Stern had a really good point about Trump.

[1996] He said he wants to be loved he wants people to love him.

[1997] This is a terrible job if you want people to love you because even the people that supported you once you get in there you're trying to do this impossible job that really no one's been able to do totally.

[1998] People forget that Obama had like a very low approval rating to at one point in time in his presidency.

[1999] I think he was in the low 40s like 44 % or something like that approval rating.

[2000] Like it's not a job that anybody does well even if you're the best at it ever you still people a giant percentage of the population millions and millions of people are going to fucking hate you yeah that's not I don't think that's in that guy's psyche especially if you check Twitter like that yeah you can block himself from it a little bit well he blocks regular people when regular people he can block himself from that yes but just like by deleting it off his phone he can kind of get away from but I don't think he could take that attention away from himself.

[2001] No, I don't think so either.

[2002] I just, I don't think it's healthy for him, especially at this late stage of his life, you know, in the 70s, taking this kind of heat.

[2003] Because before he was president, that guy, some people didn't like him, some people loved him, no big deal, he was genuinely, generally able to, like, walk around everywhere and not be hated.

[2004] Like, he could go to restaurants, people go, oh, look, there's Donald Trump.

[2005] There's no, no people were, like, hating him.

[2006] Right.

[2007] It's just like, oh, he's a, hey, it's kind of a douchebag, maybe.

[2008] Right, maybe.

[2009] Yeah, it means he seems ducy.

[2010] I like how he said that, maybe.

[2011] Yeah, probably a douche bag, whatever.

[2012] That's true up over there.

[2013] And nobody was mad.

[2014] Yeah, they might laugh or they might try to get a selfie with him, ask him a question.

[2015] But now the amount of hate he experiences is probably like four or five hundred percent more, more even, ramped up through the roof.

[2016] Yeah, it's a five -digit weird number or something.

[2017] Crazy.

[2018] Unquantifiable hate towards this.

[2019] This man with the weird hair from the apprentice.

[2020] Yeah, everybody just wants to take a free shot at him, too.

[2021] Like, everywhere he goes, poor bastard.

[2022] People are building goddamn careers off of hate that.

[2023] The Trump, the president's show on Comedy Central.

[2024] That's true.

[2025] Goddamn Colbert has beat Fallon in the Raidens lately because he's been ripping on him.

[2026] Yeah.

[2027] What fuckers are making their goddamn legacy off of this dude being an asshole.

[2028] People are mad at Fallon because Fallon's too nice to him when he's running for president.

[2029] thing.

[2030] I mean, it was already a done deal then.

[2031] You think Fallon was going to run?

[2032] No, but it was that Fallon didn't grill him.

[2033] He didn't pressure him.

[2034] That's what people are mad at, that he didn't treat him like a dangerous person.

[2035] The Fallon probably had no idea that he was going to win, too.

[2036] Yeah, it was jokey at that point.

[2037] Fallon should have played one of those weird games and then cheat it.

[2038] He said, fuck you.

[2039] I'm with her.

[2040] Yeah, he's mushing his hair up.

[2041] Big smile, mushing his hair up.

[2042] Yeah.

[2043] hmm very weird yeah it's very weird it's just it's just so strange that that's our president it's hard to believe sometimes like sometimes I'll stare at the news and I just have to look at it for like seconds like 10 15 seconds just go okay this is real this is real this is real that's that really is the president's Donald Trump have you traveled a bra yet with him as president yeah Italy Italy yeah it's it with the Yeah.

[2044] How was it?

[2045] It's normal.

[2046] Nobody gives shit.

[2047] It's normal.

[2048] They don't give a fuck.

[2049] They're doing Italy shit.

[2050] But you were doing, so you just vacation, no shows.

[2051] Yeah.

[2052] Okay.

[2053] No shows.

[2054] Yeah.

[2055] I'm sure if you go some, I've been to Canada to do shows, but I'm sure if you go and do show.

[2056] Have I?

[2057] Wait a minute.

[2058] No, I haven't.

[2059] My first shows with Trump as president will be next weekend in Edmonton.

[2060] Yeah.

[2061] Yeah, I haven't been anywhere while he's actually been the president.

[2062] it's going to be a trip man yeah they just kind of blame it on you in the few conversations I've had when I've been out of the country what are you guys doing over there it's not me yeah I don't know well they have a situation that's the exact opposite they have a super liberal president that was letting in any immigrants and now he's apparently cooled off on that too because they're having it yeah Trudeau all Also, they're having issues with free speech.

[2063] You know, people are getting fined for saying things.

[2064] They're setting up these weird laws where you can get in deep shit for misgendering people, not using the correct gender pronouns.

[2065] One of 78 different gender pronouns that people use now, like they're super ultra left wing, like his cabinet and his ideas.

[2066] He's a real, like, legitimate social justice warrior president.

[2067] So it's interesting.

[2068] It's like you got both schools Right next to each other That's uh Both of them are kind of fucked Yeah Yeah We did it They did it too We did it Russia did it Nobody should fucking be president man Nobody shouldn't be presidents Uh oh Hot take We need more We need a group of humans Just a group Like 12 Yeah Like a jury Yeah Like how jury is Yeah Something like that Yeah Yeah And a group of intelligent people that are qualified, like, with, like, a great education, excellent ethics, great morals.

[2069] You can't have just a popularity contest to see who gets to control the nukes.

[2070] It's fucking crazy.

[2071] I hope we get past it.

[2072] I hope we get past it, but I don't think we're going to.

[2073] I think once we have things written on paper, once we have, like, a way that we operate, once we have some sort of a plan that we follow, it's very difficult to get to people to shake that.

[2074] to have some sort of a new, reasonable plan to run the country without representative government, you know, like senators and congressmen and people that you have to like, I mean, they had all that shit back when they couldn't get a hold of people.

[2075] I mean, they had all that, all that stuff was, and I'm not saying that there shouldn't be some representatives.

[2076] I'm saying that the system that's in place right now was really in place right now because you had a representative of every state and they had to travel to D .C. And they did their business and they'd come back to their constituents.

[2077] Well, the constituents can all communicate in real time now.

[2078] I mean, we have this unique ability now to share your opinions, and even to vote online.

[2079] That also should be an option.

[2080] 100 % we should be voting online.

[2081] I don't know about that.

[2082] That could be easily great.

[2083] This guy's got dick picks on the cloud.

[2084] He's worried about people voting online.

[2085] Listen.

[2086] Who knows?

[2087] That's just a dark dick.

[2088] That could be anybody.

[2089] It could be anybody.

[2090] That's not me Play the voice Play the voice It's not saying anything There it is Fake news Fake news Rooters Photoshopped Yeah I just think a better system Is possible This is not the best system I feel like this is like Trying to patch up Windows 95 Over and over again Just come up with a new system Yeah it's A couple of years old Come on Mix it up Come on mix it up But you know That's gonna take A lot of time A lot of time to do.

[2091] What's in the notes, man?

[2092] We got to do it already.

[2093] Everything?

[2094] Pretty much.

[2095] We got through it organically.

[2096] Yeah.

[2097] I mean, yeah, I didn't try it.

[2098] I didn't, I'm not a, you know, I'm not a hammer it in type of, you know, morning, morning radio type of, you know.

[2099] That's the worst.

[2100] Oh, so what do you want to talk about?

[2101] Do you do those still?

[2102] Do you do morning radio shows?

[2103] No, I haven't done them in a while.

[2104] I, uh, no. And I don't even...

[2105] Those are the worst.

[2106] They asked me to call in.

[2107] So Hannibal, I understand that you were at a baseball game recently.

[2108] Yeah, I was like baseball game.

[2109] Baseball is super boring.

[2110] Yeah, I can't.

[2111] No. We got through everything except for weirdly the one...

[2112] You know, congratulations on a thousand episodes.

[2113] Oh, thanks, by the way.

[2114] I started a podcast last year.

[2115] Oh, that's right.

[2116] Yeah.

[2117] Handsome Rambler.

[2118] Ooh.

[2119] It's a good name.

[2120] It was a high name.

[2121] I'm locked into it now.

[2122] That's a good name.

[2123] I like it.

[2124] It's fun, no. It's been good.

[2125] Do you have guests?

[2126] Have guests on.

[2127] Yeah.

[2128] Where do you do it?

[2129] We do it all over.

[2130] We do it like we, it's me and my DJ Tony Trim, so we do a lot of them in Chicago, but we travel and, yeah, it's, we have comedians and we have a lot of musicians on.

[2131] How often do it?

[2132] I do them.

[2133] We put them out every week, but we block record them just because we usually traveling a lot.

[2134] So we just, we have a theremin, and we do make goofy songs.

[2135] Where's that set?

[2136] That's Tony's crib in Chicago.

[2137] Oh, that's a nice set up there.

[2138] Yeah, so we play some songs and shit and goof off and do some interview stuff.

[2139] It's a fun time, though.

[2140] It's been good.

[2141] Nice.

[2142] It's kind of changed, you know, how I feel like I'm, when I talk to people, I feel like a better person.

[2143] Not because I have a podcast, but I feel like I'm more in tune what a person is saying than I used to be.

[2144] I know what you talked about.

[2145] Yeah, where I end up accidentally interviewing people.

[2146] When you talk to them in real life.

[2147] But like asking good questions.

[2148] Right.

[2149] I genuine, like not in a practicing way where I end up talking to people but asking, you know, better questions than the way you from.

[2150] So the getting beyond the surface level.

[2151] So I think that's happened because of that.

[2152] Well, I feel like the same thing with me. I learned how to be a better conversation list.

[2153] Yeah.

[2154] You evolve, for sure.

[2155] You also learn what's annoying about your speech patterns.

[2156] Oh.

[2157] I say a lot of years.

[2158] Yeah.

[2159] That's what I...

[2160] People say like a lot.

[2161] Like?

[2162] Yeah.

[2163] It's like, there's like, you know, you know and like, those are big ones.

[2164] Yeah.

[2165] You know, like, and yeah.

[2166] Yeah.

[2167] Because I just said three years in five seconds.

[2168] We also learn how bad like a lot of regular people are at having actual conversations.

[2169] A lot of people are just waiting.

[2170] for you to stop talking so they can talk like they're barely paying attention to what you're saying yeah yeah being a good conversation list is it's huge it's a lot of tools yeah did you did you read books and shit when you first started or did you just go into it or did you did you study certain people when you as you went along or when you first started no no no total trial in error just doing it a lot you know in a thousand episodes but we've done a thousand episodes plus another 40 that were like fight companions podcasts on a plane podcast on a hike there's a bunch of different ones fight breakdowns how often do you listen to or do you watch I listen to occasionally I listen to one if I think it sucks if I think I was bad or if I think the person said something like super interesting like there was one the other day with Sean Carroll he's an astrophysicist and he's an expert in quantum theory and it's just shit he was saying is so hard to grab a hold of i had to listen to it several times damn yeah but it's mostly just me asking questions and he him talking but it's just the stuff that he's saying is so intense you got to kind of listen to it over and over again with my feeble little brain just to try to like store it you know like okay what is he saying and there's another one um there's this woman that she's on all the time uh ronda patrick dr ronda patrick what's a specialty um nutritional absorption and just how nutrients affect the body that's like the big thing with her and she's one of the smartest people I've ever talked to she's freaky smart like almost like an alien you're talking to her and you realize how dumb you are because you can ask her a question about something and not only can she tell you what it is she'll recite the studies that were done and what percentages the studies and she's just pulling this right out of it in between her ears right she's not no prep no computer into she has notes, but she rarely uses them when she comes on the podcast.

[2171] She'll, like, have something that she wants to talk about, like some new study on, like, you know, like broccoli sprouts was one that she went over the last time because she's been experimenting with broccoli sprouts.

[2172] And she's a clinical researcher as well, so she does actual scientific research.

[2173] So she's one of them that I listen to, like, several times, just to try to remember what the fuck she was saying.

[2174] So does she hit you up the same way I hit you up with, Joe, got this broccoli sprouts shit.

[2175] I need to get off.

[2176] sometimes yeah yeah yeah sometimes she'll say you know i'll hit her up too because she's a researcher too because she's always like uh for lack of a better word balls deep in research right and she's like sometimes she doesn't have time to do podcast she's the middle of so many different things that she's working on actual science you know that's the interesting thing about having real scientists on is you realize like what a different world they live in absolutely i would never have a scientist on mine no But you might enjoy it.

[2177] Maybe down the line, but right now I keep it to people, yeah, keep it fun and with people I know.

[2178] I think, yeah, it may be down the line as I grow at it, then I be able to carry that kind of conversation with confidence or at least lead them into what they want to say and ask engaging questions during it.

[2179] But for right now, keeping it rappers, comedians, musicians.

[2180] Just fun, right?

[2181] Well, some of my favorite podcasts that I do are like comedians like yourself.

[2182] or my friends or um one thing i can tell you though looking at that image of you guys yeah this is what a mistake that we did when we first started out we did it on couches yeah problem with couches is you got to like sit forward where the microphone is they're not that comfortable right like i realized after a while i see how you guys are like everybody's leaning forward look at that see like on this show you're sitting in these ergonomic uh office chairs yeah you're sitting back and you but you're sitting up and you can sit here for hours and hours at a time if you do three hours sitting the way byron bowers is right there right that shit's going to hurt you back oh well we we keep about an hour and a half or so hour and a half's good yeah that's right when it starts to twing thank you like but like um office chairs are the way to go there's a reason why they make these things like especially these ergonomic ones yeah these are from the ergo depot they're called capiscos for people that ask and they're um they're not a sponsor or anything they just they're badass chairs and they force you to sit up straight so you can sit in these for hours and it doesn't fuck with your back.

[2183] Solid tip, Joe Rogan.

[2184] Solid tip.

[2185] I appreciate that.

[2186] I made those mistakes.

[2187] I had a couch.

[2188] And Ari Shafir took that couch.

[2189] He sold it.

[2190] I gave it to him and he did something with it.

[2191] I think he e -bated or something.

[2192] Let everybody know.

[2193] It's the couch.

[2194] Look at this going on here.

[2195] What's happening here?

[2196] That's, we went to Moog Fest.

[2197] What is that?

[2198] Moog Fest.

[2199] Moog is the company, they make synthesizers.

[2200] So a lot of bands.

[2201] and you'll see they use MoG products.

[2202] And so the Theramini that we use on the podcast, you know, the Theramini is the instrument that you can operate with waves, like just you move your hands around it.

[2203] They make that.

[2204] And so Tony, my coals, he said, oh, we should go to Moog Fest.

[2205] And so I was like, that should be a good idea.

[2206] They had their festival's in Durham.

[2207] So I reach out to them and they said, sure, come through the festival.

[2208] We did a couple podcasts.

[2209] And then also they have a workshop where you can build your own drum synthesizer.

[2210] So it's a two -day workshop where you build it.

[2211] They give you all the parts and you build it from scratch and you do all the soldering and squirt.

[2212] So I built this drum synthesizer in May. Is that what you're doing there?

[2213] Is that what's in your hand?

[2214] That's a soldering iron or something like that?

[2215] At that point, yeah, I'm soldering right there.

[2216] Whoa.

[2217] So that's like a, what is it?

[2218] that what are those boards called circuit board circuit board yeah so yeah we both worked on i didn't do all the work on like but uh i did a lot of that was my first time soldering anything or doing i hadn't done actual building shit with my hands in a long time but yeah then we uh then when we built them all everybody built theirs and then at the end of the class linked them all together uh and they just and just kind of fucked around with them it just made crazy noise yeah wow yeah that's interesting it was fine man that seems pretty badass yeah making your own sense so so that's a cool what does just off a whim you just decided to go and do that well we were because yeah we just uh i looked it up and it was a bunch of artists that i liked there too and so it just and we reached out to them it's kind of a chill festival it's it have some bigger artists but it's still pretty small in the way that we were able to hit them up a few weeks before and they were able to accommodate us with time slots.

[2219] They said, okay, they were already going to have somebody interview Flying Lotus, so they had us interview him, and we interview Animal Collective, and they were pretty just loose.

[2220] It was just loose and chill, and it was easy to navigate.

[2221] It was a fun festival.

[2222] Yeah, it was just on a whim.

[2223] So do you use that thing now?

[2224] That's got to be kind of satisfying, knowing that you made something?

[2225] I haven't used it yet, because I had to get it from New York, bring it to Chicago and start using it.

[2226] I use the theremin more, though.

[2227] That theremin is fun.

[2228] So, like, what do you make music?

[2229] We make songs on the podcast.

[2230] We do instead of doing an ad read, we do a jingle for each one.

[2231] We do an original song for each ad.

[2232] So you write the songs and you're like with their talking points?

[2233] We do, well, we do the song and it's kind of hooky usually just based, just saying the same.

[2234] Like, we got Beville as one of our sponsors So we go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and he'll produce around it.

[2235] And then we'll do the read after the song.

[2236] This is the there are many that he's talking about, too.

[2237] Oh, wow.

[2238] Wave your hands over it, and it makes music.

[2239] Five millimeter stereo headphone out.

[2240] Huh.

[2241] The other antenna will control free.

[2242] I know about that hand technique.

[2243] I usually do a full open hand.

[2244] That's Mars attack shit.

[2245] It's real weird.

[2246] It's a real weird thing.

[2247] But it's fun, man. So we've made some beats with that.

[2248] Wow.

[2249] That's fascinating.

[2250] I never heard of this thing before.

[2251] Yeah, we really used that.

[2252] I mean, we had, and Tony will be, he'll have a drum machine.

[2253] We got a microphone that does, like, auto tune and stuff.

[2254] Wow.

[2255] So it's really the cover up that we're bad interviews.

[2256] It's like, it'll be alone and we can't think of something.

[2257] You're like, ooh, it just start goofing off and making it a song.

[2258] But don't you think like you're probably not an interviewer?

[2259] You're just having a conversation, right?

[2260] Yeah, well, I mean...

[2261] That's what podcasts are, really.

[2262] Right, absolutely.

[2263] But I just...

[2264] I can talk, you know what I mean?

[2265] But I also want to be...

[2266] When I have a guest, I want to, like, put them in a position to shot, you know what I mean?

[2267] And so sometimes I'll catch myself kind of going off.

[2268] And I mean, oh, shit, let me get it back to them.

[2269] You know what I mean?

[2270] That's for you's that thing?

[2271] Well, no, I'll catch myself going off onto a long -ass story.

[2272] and I realize that, let me just bring it back and get it to this guest.

[2273] Yeah, that's what I mean.

[2274] Yeah.

[2275] That's nice.

[2276] It's fun, though.

[2277] It's a fun time.

[2278] As long as it's fun, man. That's everything.

[2279] Do you find that, like, a lot of people that are coming to your shows, they listen to the podcast, and it sort of, like, gets you closer to them?

[2280] Yeah, it is.

[2281] Well, we get a lot of messages about it, and people say they've bought thereminis because you're like, I didn't even know what a there or many was, but now I want one because they play it so goddamn, much and it's kind of a running theme on the show where uh the guest of a what is that thing and me like ooh and that's a therapist so it's just kind of uh it's almost like a a third host of the show where the person finds out what it is and i explain it pretty much every time it's uh it's a fun time though and uh so tell people that's handsome rambler they get that on itunes iTunes, SoundCloud, the other ones.

[2282] What is it?

[2283] What else you got?

[2284] I don't know.

[2285] What is it?

[2286] Google Play.

[2287] Oh, Google Play, that's right.

[2288] Google Play.

[2289] It's amazing how few people bring up Google Play.

[2290] Because half the people have Android's, don't they?

[2291] But Google Play never gets discussed.

[2292] And you can get Google Play on an iPhone too, right?

[2293] But you can't get iTunes.

[2294] Can you get iTunes on an Android phone?

[2295] You can't get the podcast on Google Play on the iPhone because there's a podcast app which Google or Apple doesn't usually let you compete with their own apps there yet built in the phone They don't let you.

[2296] But they let you use some podcast apps, right?

[2297] I don't know.

[2298] There's that comedy podcast app that Ari Shafir is always talking about.

[2299] But that's different though.

[2300] That's a comedy app that's aggregating comedy things.

[2301] They wouldn't let you just use an actual podcast app other than theirs.

[2302] I don't think so.

[2303] I could be speaking wrong, but I don't think so.

[2304] Yeah, man. It's a tough road for those Android people.

[2305] It's a tough road.

[2306] people just look at you illegitimately if you it's a green text message man yeah they get weirded out by you yeah I bought one already and it's coming soon you bought one yeah I bought it off the whim red like that oh I saw that they made one they just announced it and I was like it looks tremendous they made an Android phone yeah and it has any they just showed to put up a picture where you can only see like the corner and the rest of it's all like shaded out I'll see if I can find it real quick no that dude Marcus got a hold of one yeah then I saw the video but I already bought it before that I just kind of went ahead Because they had some wording on the bottom that, like, there's going to be some special things that you won't be able to buy if you don't buy in this window.

[2307] It was a wholesale pitch, but, like, I just went ahead and bought it.

[2308] So you're going to switch over to Android?

[2309] Not switch.

[2310] It'll just be like a second whole phone?

[2311] You're going to have a whole phone?

[2312] If it doesn't work, I'll sell it and just whatever.

[2313] But it's supposed to also be a modular something or other for the new cameras they're going to have coming out too.

[2314] So it'll actually be a physical tool.

[2315] It's more or less just a five -inch screen.

[2316] That's a tool for these cameras that don't have any screens on.

[2317] Yeah, and those red cameras for people.

[2318] don't know there's a lot of television shows to get filmed with those they're like super high -end high definition top of the food chain cameras that new phone does look dope and it's got like these crazy grips on the side of it like the side of it is not smooth it's got like finger holes like where your your hand grips onto it well they had to been doing great as a camera company when they say let's do phones also yeah let's get crazy holographic display what yeah well marcus is a video what is marcus's last name brownley There's a video where Marcus is watching it, and he's like, whoa.

[2319] He can't show you what it looks like.

[2320] He said he can't show you.

[2321] He goes, you can tell.

[2322] Shit.

[2323] You can see my reaction to it.

[2324] And by the way, he's like the reaction is not even to the finished product, which be even better than it is now.

[2325] But you see how the side edges have those weird grips to it?

[2326] It's really kind of interesting.

[2327] Yeah, he's messing with it.

[2328] But you could see, like, when he's holding it in his hand, like what it looks like.

[2329] Is that it?

[2330] He's just talking about it I think that's a different video than the one I saw Maybe it's not He was on a couch Yeah there it is And you see the thing It doesn't look like any other phone You've ever seen before Like yeah there you go Like see the sides of it It's all like It's got like ripples Like finger slots Yeah It's real big too Huge It's way bigger than the iPhone Yeah He's got big hands So you can't tell as much I got tiny hands I'd be dropping this shit.

[2331] Do you?

[2332] Which one?

[2333] You have a regular iPhone?

[2334] Yeah, I didn't even have the big phone.

[2335] Yeah, because my hands can't handle that shit.

[2336] You get a two -hand it.

[2337] Yeah.

[2338] But there's so much, it's so worth it if you go online.

[2339] Like, if you go online, you want to read something online, it's just so much better with the big screen.

[2340] It's just the experience and looking at pictures and videos of fireworks and shit.

[2341] Yeah.

[2342] Just the holographic display is interesting.

[2343] I'm a little worried, too, that they announce something they won't be able to deliver on, which happens from time to time.

[2344] Oh, Jamie's Mr. Capico.

[2345] There's a size difference.

[2346] The thing's giant.

[2347] The red marketing person went from really excited.

[2348] Got mad of Jamie.

[2349] We'll see.

[2350] We'll see.

[2351] A full -on hype piece until I don't know if they're going to be able to do it.

[2352] You're going to get a bunch of eggs on Twitter with like zero posts.

[2353] Like, fuck you, young Jamie, piece of shit.

[2354] Yeah.

[2355] There's that Galaxy Note 8 looks insane too.

[2356] That's coming out real soon.

[2357] That's like almost out.

[2358] They don't still make the airplane announcements about the things, do they?

[2359] That was a seven.

[2360] Yeah, they don't make it anymore.

[2361] Pretty much everybody's gotten rid of that thing.

[2362] If you're a holdout, you're like, I don't go, fuck.

[2363] I charge it, but I charge it in a, I take a pot from my stove.

[2364] I charge it in that fucking thing just to catch you fire.

[2365] Put it in the fireplace.

[2366] Did you see that little video showing how people to, if they're in the floods, how to still charge their phones off of a nine -volt battery?

[2367] No. A key.

[2368] In a key, yeah.

[2369] What?

[2370] It looks sketchy, but it works.

[2371] You can do it?

[2372] How do it?

[2373] Nine -volt battery.

[2374] Put the...

[2375] In a car charger.

[2376] I'm on the Internet too much.

[2377] I need to unplug.

[2378] It does happen.

[2379] Oh, it was a different lady that showed.

[2380] This is the same...

[2381] Okay, so she's got a car charger, and she takes the car charger and sticks it on the end of a 9 -volt battery, like one of the slots.

[2382] and then puts a key in the other slot.

[2383] I think you've got to touch it together to get the circuit.

[2384] What if this lady is burst into flames and lost our eyelids?

[2385] So you can get electrocuted by doing this is what I heard.

[2386] So yeah, be careful.

[2387] Even from a 9 -volt battery you can?

[2388] It obviously won't be a big charge, I don't think, but it will charge the phone.

[2389] So she touches the two of them together.

[2390] Wow, that works.

[2391] That's crazy.

[2392] That's nuts.

[2393] So if you're in a pinch and all you've got to 9 -volt battery and you need to call 911.

[2394] Why don't they make a battery adapter for an iPhone?

[2395] Why don't they make a little thing where you can plug a 9 -volt battery into it?

[2396] Just go to a store, buy a battery, plug that fucker in, and charge your phone.

[2397] Does anybody have that?

[2398] How do they not have that?

[2399] Because they have those banks, you know, those power banks that you can plug your shit into.

[2400] Seems like somebody would have this.

[2401] Have you seen that new luggage that you could ride?

[2402] Have you seen that shit?

[2403] Turns it into a scooter?

[2404] Yes.

[2405] It's fucking amazing.

[2406] How much is that?

[2407] I don't know.

[2408] I retweeted it the other day, though.

[2409] It was unmashable, and I was like, get the fuck out of here.

[2410] The thing goes eight miles an hour.

[2411] You sit on that fucker, and you ride around the airport with it.

[2412] That's a...

[2413] It's legit.

[2414] That's one way to stunt.

[2415] That's one way to handle a layover.

[2416] Just drive around the airport until your luggage runs out of batteries.

[2417] But you can also use the battery charging of that, the battery, and you use it to charge your phone.

[2418] Like, you can plug your phone into that.

[2419] That alone is where.

[2420] worth it.

[2421] Like always having battery power right there connected to your luggage.

[2422] That's a lot of a lot of these uh, luggagees are doing that now.

[2423] Look at that.

[2424] Get the fuck out of here.

[2425] And that's a carry -on?

[2426] Yes.

[2427] These people are having a good old time.

[2428] I have the go.

[2429] Oh, come on.

[2430] I got to get online immediately and buy this.

[2431] Come on.

[2432] It's called.

[2433] What is it called?

[2434] A modemot bag?

[2435] Come on.

[2436] Look.

[2437] See?

[2438] She's fitting her stuff in there and then she drives off.

[2439] Wee.

[2440] But look at this.

[2441] She could plug into it, that's what I like.

[2442] Yeah.

[2443] I want to see you ride that in an airport, though.

[2444] I think it would be fucking.

[2445] You don't think I do it?

[2446] I don't know.

[2447] You don't know if I do it?

[2448] What?

[2449] What?

[2450] She had a gyroscope.

[2451] Is that real?

[2452] I'm getting that.

[2453] Back up a little bit.

[2454] Right there and then there's a...

[2455] Oh, they're just next to a segue just to show you.

[2456] Is there a standing option?

[2457] Like, can the...

[2458] Can you stand up?

[2459] Can the handlebars go up and then...

[2460] Oh, see, this is why that doesn't work, because I got that failed.

[2461] Yeah, but this is a guy that's just rolling around on it like an asshole.

[2462] Oh, this is that dude that's on YouTube.

[2463] Who's that guy?

[2464] Casey something.

[2465] Yeah, he's famous on YouTube.

[2466] Is that his apartment?

[2467] That's his office.

[2468] Whoa.

[2469] Yeah.

[2470] What is he doing in there?

[2471] Making a Frankenstein monster?

[2472] He makes all kinds of videos and films and shit.

[2473] He's been making movies on YouTube and HBO for 15 years or something.

[2474] Oh, he's got a crazy workshop, man. Uh -huh.

[2475] Is he in Brooklyn or something?

[2476] Is he one of those dudes?

[2477] Manhattan, Broadway, somewhere like that.

[2478] Interesting.

[2479] Yeah, he's got nine screens.

[2480] Godfather's always on right there.

[2481] Oh, yeah?

[2482] The Godfather is always on?

[2483] Godfather one and two on a constant loop.

[2484] I'm about to go by the scooter, man. Let's wrap this up.

[2485] Hannibal, tell everybody where are you going to be.

[2486] They want to see you go do stand -up?

[2487] Oh, I'll be, I'm going to be in Camden, New Jersey.

[2488] Bristol, Virginia with Lauren Hill and Nass, September 14th or 15.

[2489] And then...

[2490] Do you talk to Lauren Hill about taxes?

[2491] I haven't talked to her.

[2492] I haven't...

[2493] We haven't done any dates together yet.

[2494] You're going to ask her about taxes?

[2495] I don't know.

[2496] They locked her up.

[2497] They did lock her up for taxes.

[2498] That's a weird backstage convo for a first meeting.

[2499] Hey, so taxes and stuff, that's crazy.

[2500] Locked her up.

[2501] In jail.

[2502] For like a while.

[2503] For a couple years.

[2504] I think.

[2505] Yeah.

[2506] But yeah.

[2507] Now she's out.

[2508] She's out.

[2509] And touring.

[2510] Somehow's me, Lorne Hill, Nause.

[2511] That's amazing.

[2512] On a tour.

[2513] I think Chromix is one of the other acts.

[2514] We'll be in Seattle, Bay Area, Miami, San Diego, playing Hollywood Bowl, October 5th.

[2515] Beautiful.

[2516] And all my dates, Hannibalburrs .com.

[2517] So check me out this fall.

[2518] Check them out, ladies and gentlemen.

[2519] Thanks, yo.

[2520] My pleasure.

[2521] All right, folks.

[2522] This fucking podcast is over.

[2523] Live your lives.

[2524] Thank you so much.

[2525] Bye -bye.

[2526] That's fun, man.