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[0] This is exactly right.
[1] Hey, this is exciting.
[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.
[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.
[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.
[5] Who killed Saz?
[6] And were they really after Charles?
[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?
[8] This season, murder hits close to home.
[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.
[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.
[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.
[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?
[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.
[14] Only Martyrs in the building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.
[15] Goodbye.
[16] I just found a watch.
[17] Free watch.
[18] Do you want to keep this?
[19] It's so cute.
[20] Free watch.
[21] Free watch in the couch at Georgia's house.
[22] And with that Hi, welcome to my favorite murder The Hometown Mini Edition It's a surprise We just read some of the emails You guys have sent us Telling us your hometown murders Because they're so good and plentiful There's probably 100 billion Yeah I think in our Gmail right now At least So we're really trying to chip away at these So we're dropping a mini episode for you Yeah So we can Just at least get some of these read.
[23] Some of the, we were just trying to catalog these and get them out out in the open.
[24] Everybody's got a murder story they want to tell.
[25] Yeah, and you can do that by emailing us at my favorite murder at Gmail.
[26] Make it interesting, write it out, don't put a link of like some random wiki page.
[27] No more, I would say no more than eight paragraphs, probably.
[28] Short of the better if you're good at grammar.
[29] Grammar's great.
[30] All right.
[31] Let's read.
[32] Those are all the tips you're going to get.
[33] Yeah, that's all we can tell you.
[34] Want me to go first?
[35] Sure.
[36] Because this one is from Eva, and she says, this is my hometown murder paranormal edition.
[37] You know, we like those.
[38] Hello, ladies.
[39] I've been gleefully binging on your podcast that was recommended to me a couple weeks ago on the last podcast on the left page.
[40] Yay, that's nice.
[41] Thanks, guys.
[42] I'm so glad they did.
[43] So are we, Eva.
[44] This is a combination of my hometown murder, that being Detroit at any time of this story.
[45] story and what I believe got me into true crime.
[46] I was four years old back in 1972 and my dad and uncle went to a union meeting together.
[47] Now, please keep in mind, I was only four and can only remember this in what I can best explain as flashes and what my mother has told me. As we, my mom and I wait at home for my dad to come home, she's watching TV in the living room and I'm watching TV in another room.
[48] And she tells me that she hears me scream and start crying and she runs to me And she grabs me and asks me what's wrong.
[49] And I point to a family photo of my parents and I, on the wall and tell her, I can't, can't you see my uncle's face is bleeding?
[50] Ew, that just made my arm.
[51] I just got shivers in one arm, which is kind of a weird family.
[52] Oh, my God.
[53] That's called a heart attack, I think.
[54] Oh, oh, well, buy you guys.
[55] Stephen, I love you the most.
[56] That's the secret I've been keeping the whole time.
[57] Wait, what?
[58] Yeah.
[59] Okay, so, sorry.
[60] Back to Eva's email.
[61] So she says, can't you see my uncle's face is bleeding?
[62] Ew, creepy out of a four -year -old.
[63] Yeah.
[64] Four -olds are creepy.
[65] Creeps.
[66] And she said, she looks at the photo and she thinks I'm going insane.
[67] And so I said, I sobbed uncontrollably and kept telling her that my uncle was going to die and that they were going to throw him in the water in that white car.
[68] Children!
[69] She was finally so spooked at what I was trying, at what I was saying that she said she spanked me to try to try to snap, snap me out of it.
[70] Oh my God, the 70s.
[71] The 70s.
[72] That's like a rational thing back then.
[73] Yeah, but she also, because her mom was trying to snap her out of it.
[74] And probably her mom was so scared at that point that her, her four -year -old in like adorable baby voice.
[75] Yeah, being like, blood, mommy, blood.
[76] Blood, mommy.
[77] They're going to kill him, mommy.
[78] So then after the mom spanks her, no. She said, her mom told her that she told her.
[79] You can hit me all you want, but my uncle is still going to die.
[80] Holy shit.
[81] And this is, she specified this in the beginning, but I didn't read it.
[82] It's her mom's, the mom's brother.
[83] Oh my God.
[84] I was wondering that.
[85] That was my editorial where I was like, that doesn't matter.
[86] And of course, it's a key element to the story.
[87] Okay, back into this email.
[88] Finally, my dad gets home and my mother explains what happened.
[89] My dad said to her, you're going to believe that.
[90] So she asks him to please go back to the bar where they were after the meeting to make sure he's okay.
[91] My uncle and his family did not have a home phone.
[92] Don't ask me why.
[93] That's just nuts.
[94] The 70s.
[95] So my dad goes back, comes home and tells my mom that he was not there anymore and he probably went home.
[96] A few hours later, my mother gets a call from my grandfather who's at the hospital and tells her to please go right away.
[97] My uncle has been shot in the face and he was already brain dead.
[98] Come say goodbye.
[99] Turns out there was an ugly union related argument.
[100] My uncle was the union rep. They shot him and they were going to dispose of his body via a white car when they all got caught.
[101] Now, both my arms have chills.
[102] Oh, my God.
[103] My mother always said that she had not believed my father, that had she not told my father, nobody would have ever believed her.
[104] I only remember, like I said in flashes, for some reason I do remember that I was watching Lassie.
[105] Thank you, stay sexy, and don't get murdered.
[106] Best advice ever, Eva.
[107] Oh my god Like did the parents ever love her again?
[108] Probably not Well they were definitely scared of her after that And gave her whatever she asked for Totally it's like that one Twilight Zone episode Yes Yeah we're like they have to appease them The little kid or he'll make you go away Yeah That's right That is so creepy I love it I buy it I also want to know Did she ever have any visions after that Me too Now I want to go into the whole paranormal podcast.
[109] You could do a paranormal episode.
[110] That's a great idea.
[111] Let's do that.
[112] Oh, hold.
[113] I'm really sorry, but I just un -email that said, oh, one more thing.
[114] Oh, that's exciting.
[115] Oh, wait.
[116] This starts, hello ladies, a couple more quick stories.
[117] It might be too long.
[118] Okay.
[119] You know what, though?
[120] It's two paragraphs.
[121] Okay.
[122] All right, Eva, this is all about you today.
[123] Just a couple quick stories.
[124] I have belonged to true crime groups for as long as I can remember.
[125] Eventually, I became friends with Carl Sutcliffe, brother of Peter Sutcliffe, the Yorkshire Ripper.
[126] Who eventually became my prison pen pal until I felt really weird about thinking of him as a friend like that way and cut him off.
[127] Cut off communication.
[128] All right, Eva, you're on the razor's edge right now.
[129] Anywho, Carl told me that at the time of the Yorkshire Ripper murders, he was in his teens, his brother Peter, being his senior by over 10 years.
[130] Well, Carl had this girlfriend, and he would always ask Peter to please give her right home.
[131] Oh, shit.
[132] so that the Ripper wouldn't get her, not knowing he just put her in the car with the Ripper himself.
[133] Another story is about my friend Jimmy's Boy Scout trip to a fun house here in Chicago.
[134] He said that boys were being boys and pushing and shoving the people dressed up to scare the people in the fun house and running around and such.
[135] And he pushed this clown and grabbed him and said, you little motherfucker, I ought to kill you and let him go.
[136] He is convinced it was John Wayne Gasey at that carnival.
[137] because it was being sponsored by the Jacy's who John Rangaycey belonged to.
[138] Wow.
[139] Oh, for sure, him.
[140] And then she just said, I have a few more stories, but I don't want to bombard them.
[141] Nope, she, shoot, she done good.
[142] No, Eva, you delivered on every single one of those stories.
[143] You did not get on Karen's shit list.
[144] No, you're number one.
[145] Well done.
[146] That was great.
[147] Great job, Eva.
[148] Okay.
[149] This one's by Aubrey.
[150] It's called, the subject was my daughter.
[151] helped catch a murderer.
[152] Okay, my hometown murder, I always skip the nice stuff.
[153] What does that say about me?
[154] That I don't...
[155] That you...
[156] Well, we don't want to come off as like congratulatory.
[157] Yeah, but it's so nice.
[158] But it is really nice.
[159] And it's what they wrote.
[160] It is what they wrote and it's nice and I don't want people to think...
[161] I don't want them...
[162] I don't want people to think that they just started with their...
[163] Anyways.
[164] Right.
[165] My hometown murder happened in 1999 when I was eight years old in Racine, Wisconsin, which is about halfway between Milwaukee and Chicago.
[166] on Lake Michigan.
[167] She can't remember any of the names, and she apologizes, but I swear this happened.
[168] My sister and I were playing in her backyard in June of 99.
[169] We lived in town, we lived in towns where a yard and our neighbor's yard were only separated by a four -foot chain link fence.
[170] Suddenly a man wearing only boxer shorts and carrying a knife, ran into my neighbor's yard from the alley, followed by two police officers.
[171] The officers yelled at my sister me to get in the house and lock the doors.
[172] My two sister, my two sisters ran but of course I froze in fear and she says or now knowing my interest in murder maybe I froze with intrigue yeah I'm going with that during the commotion the man in the boxers attempted to jump over the chain link fence into our yard however are usually docile harmless black lab Max attacked the man's foot and he decided to jump over the fence to the front yard instead I don't I don't want to I don't want to know what would have happened if that man made it into my yard where I stood parallel The police managed to detain him in the street in front of our house.
[173] After their ordeal, they came back to our front door and explained the situation.
[174] It turns out this guy had raped and murdered his ex -girlfriend and her 15 -year -old daughter.
[175] They were found stabbed to death in their apartment.
[176] When the police arrived at his house to arrest him, he wasn't there and couldn't be found for months.
[177] When they found him, he was camped out in the woods near my house.
[178] Woods that my 12 -year -old sister walked past alone every day to get to and from school.
[179] No. When they found Yeah, the woods, man The woods Chapped down all the woods Am I wrong?
[180] Yes Okay, good to know When they found him He was You're just trying to solve the problem I mean Yeah When they found him he ran And thus entered And ended up my neighbor's yard And just to make this story Even better When Max attacked this guy's leg He bit him so hard That he broke his ankle Good boy Yes And the guy couldn't run it anymore.
[181] The police wanted to meet our dog to formally thank him for his service.
[182] Max got a honorary police dog award, which I'm sure they just made up on the spot, but it was still sweet.
[183] Are you going to cry?
[184] Maybe.
[185] I need to eat some protein.
[186] I'm obviously having big feelings about everything I'm hearing today.
[187] Chills and tears.
[188] Chills and tears.
[189] Yeah.
[190] And then I'm sweating.
[191] Yeah.
[192] It's all of the...
[193] All the temperatures.
[194] That's unbelievable.
[195] Good boy, Max.
[196] She laid eyes on that murderer.
[197] I wonder if she hadn't been, if she had run in with her scaredy cat sisters, she wouldn't have seen it for her own two eyes.
[198] Girl, what I mean?
[199] This is why you always stay and watch.
[200] Always.
[201] Be a gawker.
[202] That's a good one.
[203] That reminds me of that like urban legend where like the people come home and the dog's choking.
[204] Do you ever hear that one?
[205] No. Should we just do this?
[206] Yes.
[207] Well, this one I heard.
[208] I remember hearing.
[209] like a camp or whatever but like the lady comes home it's of course it's a big long tale about how they live way up in the mountains is he choking on a hand yes you heard it i guess i have fingers yeah yes i guess i've heard it yeah i don't know why where that came from yeah could be you know why because it's like the tale is oldest time but you know what i do want to do can we one day do an a themed episode of um of uh urban legends that are like where they came from like that they're in fiction in fact yes can we do like what the original story based on it.
[210] Yeah.
[211] That's a murder.
[212] Yeah.
[213] You know that there is a really awesome, it's a like a cartoon compilation.
[214] It's called, it was a series and it so it was like the big book of.
[215] So it was like the big book of the 70s, the big book of, and one of them is the big book of urban legends.
[216] So they have writers teamed up with comic book artists.
[217] And then they'll draw out all the urban legends.
[218] When I read this book, my family, they're like, half of the book was family still.
[219] Kill Garra family stories.
[220] Or I was like, oh my God, my aunt Joe told me. Oh, my God.
[221] Like things that your family has told you is true.
[222] It's always like our next door neighbor.
[223] Because everybody loves a good story tale, like sitting around, whatever.
[224] But it was, I mean, every page I turned, I was like, why I heard this one about the people that get the Chihuahua in Mexico and bring it home?
[225] Oh, my God.
[226] They sneak it across the border because they find a little lost chihuahua in Mexico that's so cute.
[227] And they come home and then they take it to the vet and it's a rat.
[228] That's so stupid.
[229] legend that's so stupid but so it's kind of real it's like enough real of like this happened to our neighbor's friend do you know that i'm the kind of person that if someone told me that story i would argue with them that they were wrong like someone tells a story at a party i'm like bullshit bullshit like i just don't even let them have it fucking that's so stupid why would how would that happen and then they're like i guess you're i guess you're right and then they don't want to talk to me yes i just i guess we shouldn't have fun Georgia shouldn't be invited to her own parties.
[230] All right.
[231] Ready for this?
[232] This is from Christine.
[233] Seriously, guys, read this.
[234] It's a grandparent murder and it's ridiculous.
[235] I'll immediately read it.
[236] Hi, ladies.
[237] First off, I'd like to say, absolutely love your podcast.
[238] And I've been to listen to the first 10 episodes within three days.
[239] And I hope you include my crazy disturbing hometown murder story in an upcoming one.
[240] Oh, thank you.
[241] Guess what, Christine.
[242] My name is Christine, and I live in, should I say, New Jersey, which is your classic I name, she named the town but maybe we don't.
[243] I don't know.
[244] It's hard to say.
[245] It's hard to say if we should say it or it's hard to say the town is hard to say.
[246] Oh, no, no, it's easy to say.
[247] Oh, like you shouldn't be specific.
[248] But I can say it because she included it, right?
[249] Like if that's, I didn't say her last name.
[250] I don't understand what kind of privacy people want.
[251] I feel like if they don't put at the end, please don't use my name in this or please don't use my town or please don't use the name.
[252] I'll change the names of the victims.
[253] She's like first and last name and town and the whole thing.
[254] Let's say town not last names.
[255] Got it.
[256] My name's Christine and I live in Lambertville, New Jersey, which is your classic small town picture.
[257] Oh, picture lots of Victorian houses and nice old people who like antiques.
[258] Anyway, my high school was really small, less than 50 kids in a grade small and included a middle school.
[259] In seventh grade, I was friends with a kid named Ezra Simon Daniels, who was a little odd, but definitely not sociopath level odd at the time.
[260] We hung out with a group of about 10 kids for a couple years, and then in high school, Ezra moved out of our school district, and I never spoke to him again.
[261] Fast forward to my sophomore year of college just a few months ago, and a friend of mine from home calls and asks if I heard what Ezra did.
[262] I hadn't, so I promptly googled it.
[263] Turns out, he called the cops from a Walmart 15 minutes for my house at 5 a .m. and told him he was covered in blood and didn't know why or how he ended up in the Walmart parking lot in the first place.
[264] Then they took him back to his home where he lived with his grandparents and they found the grandparents laying in their bed bludgeoned to death with an aluminum baseball bat.
[265] Oh no. They'd beaten so badly that they had to pull their dental records to make sure it was them.
[266] It's them.
[267] I promise you.
[268] It's them.
[269] I'm not sure if Ezra admitted to doing it but after reading about it and listening to his 911 call, which you can't And find online if you're curious or want to play it on the show.
[270] Nope.
[271] Christine, stop it.
[272] To neither of those.
[273] I suspect that he was on some sort of extreme drugs and killed them and doesn't remember doing it.
[274] Good guess.
[275] I can't believe I was friends with a grandparent murderer in middle school.
[276] You never really know who's going to lose it one day.
[277] You don't.
[278] It's going to be one of us.
[279] It's so true.
[280] The odds are in our favor.
[281] I hope you guys enjoyed the super fucked up story.
[282] keep making awesome episodes have an awesome day christine thank you christine that was that was well written taught well told to the point succinct horrifying everything we want wants from well done murder a plus hey this is exciting an all new season of only murders in the building is coming to hulu on august 27th steve martin martin short and selina gomez are back as your favorite podcaster detectives but there's a mystery hanging over everyone who killed sad And were they really after Charles?
[283] Why would someone want to kill Charles?
[284] This season, murder hits close to home.
[285] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.
[286] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.
[287] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.
[288] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?
[289] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfenakis, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.
[290] Only Martyrs in the Building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.
[291] Goodbye.
[292] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.
[293] Absolutely.
[294] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash?
[295] Exactly.
[296] And if you're a small business owner, you might know Shopify is great for online sales.
[297] But did you know that they also power in -person sales?
[298] That's right.
[299] Shopify is the sound of selling everywhere.
[300] Online, in -store, on social media, and beyond.
[301] Give your point -of -sale system a serious upgrade with Shopify.
[302] From accepting payments to managing inventory, they have everything you need to sell in person.
[303] So give your point -of -sale system a serious upgrade with Shopify.
[304] Their sleek, reliable POS hardware takes every major payment method and looks fabulous at the same time.
[305] With Shopify, we have a powerful partner for managing our sales, and if you're a business owner, you can't too.
[306] Connect with customers inline and online.
[307] Do retail right with Shopify.
[308] Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify .com slash murder.
[309] Important note, that promo code is all lowercase.
[310] Go to Shopify .com slash murder to take your retail business to the next level today.
[311] That's Shopify .com slash murder.
[312] Goodbye.
[313] Can I, should I read one?
[314] Yes.
[315] Do you want, no. I'll come and do this one.
[316] All right.
[317] This is by Chazelle.
[318] Okay.
[319] I'm sure you're getting...
[320] A supermodel?
[321] Yes.
[322] She listens.
[323] Great.
[324] She's a fan.
[325] Hi.
[326] I'm sure you're getting some crazy stories, but I kind of like this one because it happened right next to my best friend's home, where she slept soundly in her bed.
[327] I am from Victoria, BC and Canada.
[328] British Columbia, right?
[329] Yes.
[330] Yeah.
[331] You got this?
[332] Okay.
[333] It's a fairly small city, but I wouldn't say it...
[334] It's a fairly small city, but I wouldn't say it's a small town.
[335] People don't get murdered very often here, but one guy freaked out one night and killed his son.
[336] his estranged wife, both her parents, and then himself by stabbing them.
[337] The thing that made the situation really crazy, besides that, is that the same night, one of the local high schools, okay, it was the same night as one of the local high school's grad camp out.
[338] Basically, the day before school starts, all the grade 12s will hang out in a in random parts of the city, moving around like a pot of whales, drinking and causing a ruckus.
[339] Due to the number of calls that the grad campout was getting, the police didn't respond to the noise complaints coming from the neighborhood of the family.
[340] That was being murdered, she wrote.
[341] My friends also lived next door to the family and subsequently had to go to therapy afterwards because her mom was afraid that she could hear the murders happening through her open bedroom window while she slept and it had infiltrated her mind.
[342] Oh, no. Anyways, hope you enjoyed this.
[343] Giselle.
[344] Levels, layers.
[345] Totally.
[346] That thing just kept giving.
[347] Kept and kept.
[348] But you know, what's funny, I understand that woman who has that fear.
[349] Who what?
[350] Like, the woman who has the fear that she somehow subconsciously absorbed horrible things and just isn't aware.
[351] No, I don't think that's, do you think that can happen?
[352] I don't know.
[353] I don't think while you're sleeping.
[354] I mean, who knows.
[355] But, like, it's why I want to stop falling asleep in front of the TV boat.
[356] Oh, yeah.
[357] It's because God knows what's going in there.
[358] Totally.
[359] Terrible.
[360] Well, do you notice that when you have it, like, sometimes you dream shit that's so obvious things that you saw that day.
[361] Like, you know, there's that new fucking Scully movie with Tom Hanks about the guy who crashed landed in the Hudson, which looks so stupid.
[362] And I had, like, such obvious, like, water, crash airplane dreams last night.
[363] Because you saw that billboard?
[364] I saw the, yeah, the trailer.
[365] Oh, oh, yeah.
[366] Which is like, that's so boring.
[367] Yes.
[368] So let's make it.
[369] It's uncreative of this conscious to serve that up.
[370] It's right there.
[371] Well.
[372] Yeah.
[373] Keep it to just your teeth falling out.
[374] Or weird people.
[375] Make it at school.
[376] Yeah.
[377] Horror movies.
[378] The basics.
[379] Yeah.
[380] Do you want to read one more?
[381] Sure.
[382] This one's from Beverly.
[383] It says, hi, Georgia and Karen.
[384] My name is Beverly, and I'm from the Hamilton County, Cincinnati.
[385] She gets right into it.
[386] She's not complimenting anybody.
[387] She's got a story to tell.
[388] I respect you, Beverly.
[389] The county I live in is so small, we have no history of murders.
[390] However, the town of Hamilton in the county north of mine, Butler, is famous for the deadliest shooting inside a private residence.
[391] The Easter Sunday Massacre.
[392] Oh, that sounds fun.
[393] Loving it.
[394] on Easter Sunday 1975 James Ruppert killed his mother his older brother his older brother's wife and his brother's eight children eight children I think I was a terrible left turn no one really knows why he shot all of them as there was never really a motive aside from him simply hating his mother and brother though some think he may have been envious of his brother as at the time of the murders James 41 was still living with his mother, drinking heavily, and had trouble holding down a job.
[395] By all accounts, his childhood was terrible.
[396] His mother wished he had been born female.
[397] Oh, that's always bad.
[398] And his father was incredibly violent.
[399] Also bad.
[400] When he was 12, his father died, and his older brother took over the role of father, including the violence towards James.
[401] Oh, no. He's currently serving two life sentences at a correctional institute in Lima, Ohio.
[402] Also, if you're interested, there is a. current murder investigation in Pike County two counties over from me everything is based on where Beverly lives which is awesome where eight members of the Rodin family were found dead in four different houses three were adjacent while the other two were a bit further away there have been no arrests but during the investigation the police found marijuana and cock fighting operations in the three adjacent houses the fuck you'll be happy to know that while the killer was fairly remorseless in the killings.
[403] All victims were shot multiple times.
[404] They left, oh, thank God, a three -year -old, six -month -old, and a four -day -old alive.
[405] Though the four -day -old was found in the same bed as her dead mother, so yeah.
[406] Oh, my.
[407] Here's the link if you want to know more.
[408] Guess what?
[409] Don't want to know anymore.
[410] But Beverly, again, a beautifully written email.
[411] That had to be a game, like a a murder, like a murder about drug money.
[412] Yeah, crime involved, mafia -esque.
[413] If you don't kill the kids, although you killed the woman, the wife.
[414] Yeah, true, but maybe she was involved.
[415] Yeah, that's, yeah, that's, I like the story of the person that doesn't kill three incredibly young children.
[416] Yeah, me too.
[417] And instead, just orphans them.
[418] Yep, just ruins their...
[419] How are we choosing one of the other people?
[420] I also like when you said, um, when they were like, um, like to wish it was born a girl and you're like that's bad and then when you said also he was abusive he said that's bad too just to like clarify that like you weren't being like one was worse than the other that's right I mean it's all bad yeah also that that's a classic turn I think that turn is the perfect example of what it's like to be into true crime when you're like ooh the Easter Sunday massacre ooh yeah and then when you immediately get you into eight children are dead.
[421] All of that, ooh, is gone.
[422] I didn't want that to happen.
[423] That's not what I was looking for.
[424] I have a, I haven't, should we end on an I survived?
[425] Sure.
[426] God, I got cat hair all over my face.
[427] First person?
[428] It's not my survived.
[429] It's like a, can you believe, um, let's see here.
[430] All right.
[431] So, oh no. Okay, so Bree wrote on the Facebook page, lots of drama today.
[432] So let's lighten the mood and talk about how.
[433] I almost got murdered.
[434] Okay.
[435] Love it.
[436] Great.
[437] So when I was four years old, my parents and I lived in a tiny duplex in a small California Mountain Town by Yosemite called Mariposa.
[438] So the year is in 1993 and my mom and I are home alone one morning all my dad is at work.
[439] Being the early 90s and all, she was in the shower and I was sitting on the couch watching cartoons.
[440] The large window above the couch was wide open.
[441] A man, maybe in his 40s, walked up to the window and started talking to me. Here's the conversation of the best.
[442] of my recollection.
[443] Hi, sweetie.
[444] How are you doing?
[445] You watching cartoons?
[446] Where's your mommy?
[447] She's in the shower.
[448] Oh, she is.
[449] Is your daddy home?
[450] Nope.
[451] It's just me and mommy.
[452] Oh, okay.
[453] Can I come in and watch cartoons with you?
[454] I don't think I'm allowed.
[455] It's okay.
[456] I know your mommy.
[457] Okay, hold on.
[458] I walk over to the door to unlock it.
[459] I'm able to reach and unlock the doorknob, but the deadbolt is slightly higher and I was a very tiny kid so I couldn't reach it.
[460] All the while, he's at the window peering in watching me trying to get the lock open.
[461] Finally, I say, I can't reach it.
[462] Let me go get Mommy.
[463] Let's see.
[464] And he says, oh, no, that's okay.
[465] Bye, sweetie.
[466] And he ran off.
[467] Then my mom got out of the shower a few minutes later, and I told her, she remembered how, I remember how white her face turned.
[468] And that's why I've always been thankful for being short.
[469] I did the same thing, but I let the person in.
[470] No. And we sat on the couch and talked.
[471] No. And my mom was, he didn't know my mom was home sick from work that day.
[472] We were both home sick.
[473] And when I told him, I still remember him going, because my mom goes, Georgia, who's here from upstairs?
[474] And he, I can remember him, like, panicking and leaving.
[475] No way.
[476] Yeah.
[477] And he gave me, like, a friendship bracelet.
[478] He was clearly going to murder me. Oh, my God.
[479] Yeah.
[480] He said he was a daughter or a salesman.
[481] He looked like, no, he looked like an out -of -work actor in his, like, best suit, which wasn't great.
[482] Yeah.
[483] Looking back, I almost got murdered.
[484] Bree, I feel you.
[485] Thank you for that story.
[486] Oh, my God.
[487] That was a good story.
[488] She stayed baby sexy.
[489] And didn't get baby murdered.
[490] Oh, my God.
[491] Sitting in front of a open window and having some goddamn hobo walk up.
[492] Yep.
[493] And you're the pie.
[494] No Wow that was crazy Is that our mini?
[495] I think that's our minisode Murder minisode That was really satisfying Great job everybody Yeah thank you guys Send us more and like make the subject line really great And that we will open it and read it Or don't because we're still going to read it anyways Yeah that's true Thank you for listening to the murder minisode Well done.
[496] Stay sexy Don't get murdered Bye Bye