MFM Minisode 128

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] Welcome to the minisode.

[2] This is my favorite murder.

[3] We read stories you tell us on paper and typing.

[4] Yep, we just read them right back at you.

[5] We just read them.

[6] We act like we're doing something.

[7] It's just reading.

[8] It's fun for us.

[9] You hear a fucking true and co -ad.

[10] It's over.

[11] You know, it's easy.

[12] You know what's funny?

[13] Like, we always talk about we feel lucky and this is a dream come true.

[14] Yeah.

[15] But literally my favorite thing in school, the only thing I ever really liked to do in school was read aloud in class oh and now i get paid to do that jobs because you never get picked you never get called on no or they do paragraph each person takes a paragraph and you're never going to shine karen i mean i i would have to wait you know 49 to 59 to 59 other kids and sitting there going are you really going to read it like that yeah that's not how you pronounce that well adjective or whatever who am i who am i to talk about not pronouncing shit right I can't believe you didn't pronounce Worcester that way.

[16] I went up in the addict and it was fun.

[17] Okay, go.

[18] Oh, wait.

[19] On a forensic files I saw recently, one of the talking head experts pronounced it addict.

[20] I love them.

[21] Up in the attic.

[22] They're my best friend.

[23] I was like, this can't.

[24] I should record it for you.

[25] I wish you would.

[26] Okay.

[27] The subject line of this is another Virginia hometown weirdo.

[28] Great.

[29] Hi, Karen, Georgia, Stephen, Elvis.

[30] Mimi, Dottie, Frank, George, et cetera, et cetera.

[31] Wow.

[32] Yeah.

[33] First of all, I want to say thank you for helping me get through my last semester of college.

[34] No problem.

[35] I had a super long commute and a lot of really tedious projects and listening to you guys really helped me get through my long days and nights.

[36] On graduation day, I listened to the podcast on my way to campus, if that's a good measure of how obsessed I am with this show.

[37] That's awesome.

[38] Thank you.

[39] My hometown weirdo has some backstory.

[40] I'm from Sterling, Virginia, a few miles from where the butt slasher apparently operated.

[41] And after hearing that particular minisode on my drive home one day, and dying laughing over it, I immediately went and told my mom about it.

[42] But she had an even better story.

[43] They always do.

[44] She said that a few years ago in my town, there were a few incidents where a woman would wake up in the middle of the night and find a strange man just laying in bed next to her.

[45] What the fuck?

[46] After the woman understandably screamed and flipped her shit, the man would just jump up out of the bed and run.

[47] This only happened two or three times, but he was dubbed the snuggler.

[48] Oh, guys.

[49] My mom's theory was that he was just a drunk guy that had walked into a little.

[50] someone's house thinking it was his own and laying down in bed only to be woken up with someone screaming in his ear.

[51] Maybe one time.

[52] Maybe.

[53] But I kind of doubt that it was that innocent.

[54] Yeah, we do too.

[55] I think he did end up getting caught, but I couldn't find very much information about him, although while I was looking him up, I found articles about another more recent case of a man in Sterling who snuck into women's houses to touch them in the middle of the night.

[56] Definitely creepy and he didn't get a hilarious nickname, but he was caught only a few months ago, April 2019.

[57] despite this and even though I laughed about it for a long time I couldn't go to sleep for hours that night laying awake in fear of the snuggler well that's it stay sexy and don't get snuggled Sarah sleeping is such a vulnerable fucking thing that's why you put the chair under the doorknob then you take a piece of fishing wire and you string it across the doorway they're invisible to it and then you put cowbells on either side and then you start a jam band and then you invite fish into your room every night okay this is called co -worker lives in haunted yipsilani ripper murder house hello beautiful stephen and my powerful women wow all caps i am freaking out i've been waiting years to write in a story and my new co -worker let's call her alley just shared something so wild i immediately had to tell you guys the other day at work she nonchalantly said the sorority house i'm living in is kind of haunted i'm more of a georgia when it comes to my belief in ghosts but I immediately demanded her to tell me. Me too.

[58] She asked if I had heard of the Michigan murders and quickly realized that she was referring to the Ipsilani Ripper, John Norman Collins.

[59] She proceeded to tell me that her sorority house is the Ypsilani Ripper's uncle's house.

[60] Oh, shit.

[61] Read the Michigan murders, everyone.

[62] It's such a fucking good book.

[63] The Michigan murders by Edward Keyes.

[64] It's old, but it's fucking like a great true crime book.

[65] Oh, good.

[66] It's just such a fucked up story.

[67] Do you have it?

[68] Yeah, Vince gave it to me. We were first dating, I was like, oh, hi, will you marry me?

[69] Oh, no, right?

[70] Yeah.

[71] He doesn't like murder.

[72] Okay.

[73] I won't borrow that one then since it binds your love together.

[74] Yeah, I wish you wouldn't.

[75] I can get my own.

[76] I'll get you one.

[77] I'll get it for you.

[78] For my next birthday.

[79] That's right.

[80] This may seem unimportant at first.

[81] Like, okay, cool, a relative, but this house is where his last murder took place.

[82] Oh, my God.

[83] John Norman Collins murdered Karen Bindman in his, ahem, police corporal uncle's basement while he was house sitting.

[84] Oh, no. up is that.

[85] He cleaned up the evidence poorly.

[86] For example, he painted over a bloodstain in the basement and left a bottle of ammonia just to prove he's the worst.

[87] Your fucking uncle is a police corporal.

[88] Are you kidding me with this shit?

[89] This evidence is what led to his eventual arrest.

[90] Anyways, on to the hauntings.

[91] Allie told me that once in the middle of the night, she woke up and saw a weird figure in her room.

[92] She described it as the grim reaper, but all white, hovering at the end of her bed.

[93] When I asked what she did when she saw that, expecting her to be freaking out internally as I was hearing her story.

[94] She said, I turned on the fairy lights and went back to bed.

[95] That's actually kind of a good solution.

[96] Yeah.

[97] Because it looks so twinkly and pretty.

[98] Yeah, you're in a Wes Anderson movie now.

[99] Nothing can go wrong.

[100] Hey, how about you rom -com your way out of this ghost situation?

[101] It's pretty.

[102] What if you fall in love with a ghost?

[103] Oh my God.

[104] That was amazing.

[105] Uh, da, da, da, da, da, back to bed.

[106] I appreciate her candor.

[107] One of her roommates also claimed to see the figure that same night.

[108] She said that when guys have slept over at the house, they have nightmares of a girl being murdered.

[109] Other typical ghost things have happened to like the oven turning on, pots and pans falling off the shelves, lights randomly turning on, and lights, which is not working.

[110] And then it says, and this is such a fucking me thing, paranormal or faulty wiring.

[111] That's right.

[112] She told me how they have done many sage cleanses and even had a pasture come in to bless the house and expel, quote, bad energy.

[113] After thinking about it, I understand why.

[114] she wasn't afraid of this ghostly figure.

[115] If it really was the spirit of Karen Bindman, who was a freshman EMU student at the time, I wouldn't be afraid of her either.

[116] She was just a sweet baby angel who had her life cut short too soon by a total asshole.

[117] And then I'll cap, sorry, this was so long.

[118] I love you all dearly.

[119] Thank you for the joy you give me during times I felt alone.

[120] XOXO