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Armchair Anonymous: Worst Job Interview

Armchair Anonymous: Worst Job Interview

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard XX

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Full Transcription:

[0] Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now.

[1] Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.

[2] Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts.

[3] Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous.

[4] I'm Dax Randall Shepern, joined by Monica Lilly Padman, the Duchess of Duluth, the miniature mouse.

[5] Hi.

[6] Hi.

[7] I think you and I have been spared a lot of these, this topic.

[8] Yeah, we have.

[9] Worst job interview.

[10] Yeah, I've only had a few, like big boys.

[11] I didn't have to interview for my detasseling corn job.

[12] Oh, you didn't, you just got that off of looks?

[13] You just submitted, like, I'm a warm body that can run through the cornfield, and they picked you up in a bus and a parking lot at 5am.

[14] Yes.

[15] And then I kind of had one.

[16] I worked at this fabrication shop in high school.

[17] I kind of just swung by and chatted with the guy.

[18] I knew him a little bit.

[19] But no, sit down.

[20] Maybe CPK for me is the only.

[21] When I was in college, I interviewed for a lot of internships in the PR space.

[22] Also, I interviewed at the SoulCycle, obviously.

[23] And I interviewed for so many nannying jobs.

[24] Do those ones feel less stressful or more?

[25] Depends on how bad I want whatever the job is regardless.

[26] That's probably true.

[27] But the kids piece is hard because, They want to see you interact with the kids.

[28] Oh, it's kind of like, go.

[29] Yeah, it's like, connect with this child now.

[30] Exactly.

[31] And if it's a lot of it's up to the kid.

[32] Yeah, that's right.

[33] They have all the power in the room.

[34] So that can get tricky.

[35] I guess I would tell myself it's easier because when I'm going into CPK, I'm like, I got to act corporate.

[36] I got to act like I'm going to be a corporate person.

[37] Yeah.

[38] That seems harder to me than like, hey, I'm a lot of fun and nice to be around and I'm responsible.

[39] Yeah.

[40] I mean, it's kind of the same thing you're doing at CPK.

[41] But I feel like too much fun in a corporate job interview is a red flag to them.

[42] I don't know if this person's serious enough to follow this.

[43] That's true.

[44] 80 point plan to give good service at CPK.

[45] It was extensive.

[46] You can't even imagine.

[47] I think personally, I like having the control.

[48] But, you know, I don't know.

[49] Okay.

[50] Well, one of the stories, are you thinking of the dude?

[51] Yes.

[52] Me too.

[53] So just an incredible, he is very nervous to tell us the story, but as this story unfolds, it's one of the funniest ones I've heard.

[54] And his delivery is what made me. Oh, it's fantastic.

[55] He's incredible.

[56] Yes.

[57] Yeah, there's a lot of great stories, but I really enjoyed just revolving door.

[58] That's my Easter egg.

[59] You'll know you're listening to the guy I fell in love with when you hear Revolving Door.

[60] That and so much more in this episode of Armchair Anonymous, Worst Job interview.

[61] Please enjoy.

[62] Come and go Take them slow You gotta know I'm gonna keep on shining Hello Veronica Hi, how are you?

[63] Good Did you relish in Veronica Mars sharing that name with Miss Mars?

[64] I didn't watch it at the time Too young?

[65] No, timeline -wise I think I might have been in law school or in college Oh my goodness Well, you look so youthful If I was in college, I was drunk And if I was in law school I was in the library So I have like a pop culture gap And I'm still catching up on things So where in the world are you?

[66] I'm in Portland, Oregon Okay, yes We should have had some contact clues here We could have probably figured that out You know, the hair and the tattoos Yeah, and the cat licking itself behind you That feels very Portland -esque as well I did several arbitrations And trials during COVID via Zoom And the cat would just appear And stare straight into the camera Oh, my God.

[67] Haunting and bad luck for all involved.

[68] Uh -huh.

[69] Okay, so you had a bad job interview, which we'd love to hear about.

[70] When and where did this happen?

[71] So this actually happened in Los Angeles because I went to UCLA Law School.

[72] Oh, go Bruins.

[73] I transferred from another law school to UCLA and was completely unprepared for how different and how intense UCLA was.

[74] And one of the things that's different is the way they do jobs.

[75] and you get on campus as a second year and all of these big law firms come to campus and you wear your suit to class and everyone's talking about the firms that they've matched with and who they've talked to.

[76] All these people have gone to like Stanford and Yale and Columbia and Harvard.

[77] And I went to Washington State where I like majored in drinking until I realized I might fail out.

[78] Yeah.

[79] And then I decided to take a minor in political science and then I decided to go to law school.

[80] So I was very not prepared, but I was like, I need a job.

[81] And these jobs back at this time, pre -recession, we're paying $35 ,000 to $40 ,000 for the summer.

[82] Oh, wow.

[83] You needed it.

[84] Not only do you need it, you end the summer nine times out of 10 with an offer for after graduation where they're going to pay you all your bar exam fees, which are like $15 ,000, plus you're going to get your first job out of law school between like $150 ,000 to $175 ,000.

[85] So you go in very scared, if you're me. And it feels very important and huge.

[86] And they do one round on campus and then you do callbacks.

[87] And I did not do well on campus.

[88] I only got two callbacks.

[89] Do the law firm set up little kiosks or pop -up tents?

[90] How are they arranged?

[91] On UCLA's campus, there's an entire hotel sort of building up near the law school that has all these little rooms.

[92] and each law firm has a little room.

[93] And all day long, they have a rotating cast of like four attorneys there, interviewing law students for two weeks.

[94] Oh, my gosh.

[95] Is it called something?

[96] On campus interviews, it's OCI.

[97] Oh, OCI.

[98] I knew there was going to be a name for it.

[99] So, and then how many interviews do you think you did to get the two callbacks?

[100] I think I did 14 or 15.

[101] It's still like a blur because you're also doing this in addition to your classes.

[102] Right.

[103] And the callbacks are at the office of the law firm.

[104] At minimum, the callback interview is now three hours long.

[105] Those are at least three interviews an hour.

[106] So it's at least nine separate attorneys all the while knowing there's money on the line and things.

[107] And I am already an anxious person.

[108] And I knew that.

[109] But I didn't know that I actually have an anxiety disorder that requires medication.

[110] I was just like, I'm in law school.

[111] Of course, I'm stressed out.

[112] I already found out by the second callback that I hadn't gotten the first one.

[113] So everything's on the line.

[114] I probably hadn't eaten the day before.

[115] I definitely hadn't eaten the morning of.

[116] I get like the nervous tummy where I'm like, I have to run to the bathroom every 15 minutes before something important.

[117] Not to get too personal, but to peepee or to puty?

[118] Oh, the shits.

[119] Oh, okay, straight shits.

[120] All right, great.

[121] I get worried about the unauthorized evacuations.

[122] That's my worst nightmare.

[123] Absolutely.

[124] And so it is very fancy.

[125] It's very high up and I'm very nervous.

[126] I can feel my hands going numb, but I'm like, it's just nerves, go in and do the thing.

[127] And I go into my first interview and this woman is so nice and she's an older lady and we're chatting and we're talking.

[128] And I think I'm doing great.

[129] It's a smaller office and we get done.

[130] And I go to shake her hand as I am leaving.

[131] And instead of shaking her hand, I launch head first into the wall.

[132] Oh, my God.

[133] I mean, full speed.

[134] I thought I probably was bleeding and I thought the wall was probably cracked.

[135] Oh, my God.

[136] And she just starts screaming.

[137] I don't know what happened.

[138] I'm dazed from hitting the wall.

[139] Oh, my God.

[140] I don't know how I made it back to the chair.

[141] I think I might have rebounded back into the chair.

[142] And she's yelling for help.

[143] Oh, boy.

[144] And the next thing I know, there's just a lot of people around.

[145] I'm in my chair and I'm like, I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.

[146] I'm so sorry.

[147] And I'm so embarrassed.

[148] Yes.

[149] And I'm like, I've got to get up.

[150] Like a boxer.

[151] Like you've been hit by an opponent and you've got to get off the mat in 10 seconds and act like you're ready to fight still.

[152] This is the first interview.

[153] Like, this is the first person I've talked to.

[154] First of 12 I still have at least eight, possibly 11 to go and I'm like, I still have to do this and there's no way that I'm going to not do this.

[155] I need this job so bad.

[156] And I to try and make everyone feel better, get up again to tell everyone I'm fine and I launch into the wall again.

[157] Oh, oh, oh my God.

[158] Oh my God.

[159] When you say, okay, hold on when you say launch into the wall, do you mean you just fall over into the wall?

[160] Or as you stand up, you catapult.

[161] What I'm imagining is that she thrust herself to get up, then the momentum just keeps going forward.

[162] Yes.

[163] Because I couldn't feel my seat.

[164] So I was like, standing up.

[165] Oh, no stability.

[166] My left foot had gone completely numb.

[167] And so my right leg, I'm standing up and I'm shooting myself.

[168] I think we've all had that moment where we get out of bed in the middle of the night to discover our legs still asleep.

[169] Have you ever had that?

[170] And you just kind of collapsed and you've worried your broken ankle.

[171] Have you ever stood up on an asleep leg, Wobby Wob?

[172] Oh, my God.

[173] Okay, it's just you and I. So I catapled into the wall again.

[174] Oh, boy.

[175] Everyone is yelling.

[176] This poor office is like filled with people.

[177] Everyone is yelling.

[178] You can't stand.

[179] Don't do it.

[180] Oh, then the words 911.

[181] Of course.

[182] And get her some water.

[183] Sit back down.

[184] Don't stand up.

[185] Who is some crackers?

[186] Yeah, some juice.

[187] Juice, apple.

[188] It's always juice.

[189] Always juice.

[190] Someone's worried about my blood sugar.

[191] I'm just, I'm okay.

[192] Please, I'm okay.

[193] And the woman who's all of a sudden, and she's like, we need to call an ambulance.

[194] I'm like, please don't call an ambulance.

[195] But you're at a law firm, right?

[196] So they're like so liability.

[197] Oh, my God.

[198] Of all places.

[199] Yeah.

[200] I didn't tell you what kind of law firm it was.

[201] Personal injury.

[202] Yeah.

[203] No. Oh, my God.

[204] I would love it if you would have taken them to court.

[205] That would have been hilarious.

[206] It's a personal injury and workers compensation firm.

[207] Oh, boy.

[208] The woman who says.

[209] office I was in was the workers' compensation partner.

[210] And so she's interviewing someone for a job.

[211] And I just keep repeatedly launching myself in the wall.

[212] Oh, my God.

[213] And then insisting that I'm okay.

[214] I'm like, no, I really want to continue.

[215] And finally I convinced I'm not to get an ambulance.

[216] They were talking about wheeling me around to the next offices in a wheelie chair.

[217] And I'm like, no, I can walk.

[218] And they're like, no, you can't.

[219] You keep.

[220] I'm like, no, I can't.

[221] And I don't know what possessed me. But I'm like, I'll take off my shoes, even though I know it's not my shoes.

[222] I wore very sensible shoes because I was worried about tripping in heels.

[223] Like that would have anything to do with it.

[224] And these shoes are broken.

[225] There's like a Tim Robinson sketch.

[226] It's like, I think you should leave.

[227] Yeah.

[228] And then because I said shoes, everyone starts going, oh, it must be the shoes.

[229] Like, everyone has given me this out.

[230] So now I have to take off the shoes and be able to stand up and like not fall.

[231] And I take off the shoes and I can stand up.

[232] She's up.

[233] She's up.

[234] She's up.

[235] She's up, everyone.

[236] And I'm back in.

[237] Form a circle.

[238] So I stand up.

[239] I'm holding my shoes.

[240] I'm holding whatever bottle of water or juice they've given me. And I'm like, I'm okay.

[241] Ready to work.

[242] I go to put my shoes back on and they go, no. They agree that I can continue if I carry my shoes with me and do not wear my shoes.

[243] What a great first impression.

[244] So I walked to every single office for the rest of the morning and complete my interviews carrying my shoes.

[245] Wow.

[246] I did not get the time.

[247] Ouch.

[248] Oh, ouch.

[249] They were in that tricky position where they all looked at each other and they're like, well, clearly we're not hiring this person.

[250] But we got to now act like we might still.

[251] Let's get her through these interviews.

[252] Well, they were like, we can't hire her because she's obviously a liability.

[253] She's going to sue us.

[254] She's definitely going to sue us.

[255] They're on high alert.

[256] Wow.

[257] Oh, boy.

[258] It's part of the panic attack.

[259] I start to like not be able to breathe and my hands and my feet go numb.

[260] Yeah, not enough oxygen to spread around.

[261] Sorry that.

[262] What a trying event in your life.

[263] It was fine.

[264] I ended up working for the appellate court the next summer and had a really great time.

[265] Oh, good.

[266] It all worked out.

[267] I guess it was good.

[268] Then you figured out your health issue.

[269] Yeah.

[270] I haven't had it happen since I started becoming medicated for the anxiety.

[271] Yeah.

[272] Well, Veronica, I'm glad you landed on your feet figuratively and literally, and you found your way into practicing law, it sounds like, based on the cat's appearances and the arbitrations.

[273] Thanks so much for telling us that story.

[274] Thanks so much for having me. This is so much fun.

[275] I was so excited.

[276] Take care and good luck with everything.

[277] Bye.

[278] Hello?

[279] Hi.

[280] How are you?

[281] Do we call you Ash or Ashley?

[282] Either's fine, but usually Ashley.

[283] I wonder why on my paper.

[284] Maybe Emma just decided to give you a nickname.

[285] Oh, give you a fun nickname.

[286] My Instagram handle is Ash.

[287] Ah, I thought that's it.

[288] Ashley, where are you?

[289] I am in Nebraska.

[290] Oh, no kidding.

[291] Oh, my God.

[292] Yeah.

[293] Did you ever see an episode of Bless This Mess set in Nebraska?

[294] I watched them all.

[295] Oh, wonderful, wonderful.

[296] Did you feel like they did a good job making Hollywood Nebraska?

[297] I live in Lincoln, so we're in a city here.

[298] But yeah, there are definitely some towns like that.

[299] Sure.

[300] Did you punch a hole in the wall?

[301] Yeah, did you get angry?

[302] No, let me guess.

[303] There's a hook to the left of us, right of you, on that door, like a hat rack, hanging on the back of the door, and it got opened and punctured it.

[304] Good job.

[305] Is that what happened?

[306] Yep.

[307] I'm in a kid closet because it's the smallest, and they just, whoop, that door right open.

[308] Yeah, they don't give a fuck when they open.

[309] and then close those doors.

[310] All right.

[311] Well, Ashley, you had a bad job interview, and we would love to hear about it.

[312] Absolutely.

[313] So I'll take you back about 20 years because I had just graduated college, had moved from Nebraska to Washington, D .C. So fish out of water in a big city, and I got a job working for the federal government at a large agency.

[314] CIA.

[315] Homeland security.

[316] She's not allowed to say.

[317] That's all I know.

[318] Yeah, I did have a security clearance.

[319] Oh, that's a good clue.

[320] You also look really young.

[321] Everyone on these calls look very young, but have a lot of experience under their belt.

[322] Yeah, mixed messages.

[323] So I had been tasked with interviewing a gentleman who was already working or volunteering in the building.

[324] So I got his resume, took a look, and then went to greet him at the door of our office.

[325] He looked quite nervous.

[326] Oh, okay.

[327] He was sweating and just kind of uncomfortable.

[328] So I tried to be so friendly.

[329] you know, welcome, how's your day?

[330] Come on in.

[331] Would you like some coffee or maybe more water for you, sir?

[332] Yeah, but first, muscle memory says, do you want some coffee?

[333] And then you go, would you like some coffee or maybe some water for you?

[334] Balance those electrolytes.

[335] Uh -huh.

[336] Maybe a banana and an aspirin for you, yeah.

[337] So we sit down and he is still a little bit nervous.

[338] So I just throw him a softball like, hey, tell me about yourself.

[339] Where are you from?

[340] He launches into wherever he's from, let's say, upstate New York, you know, somewhere cold.

[341] Because he said, I'm just so sick of the winter.

[342] her.

[343] I hate the snow.

[344] But you would know that because you're from Nebraska.

[345] Uh -oh.

[346] How does he know that I'm from Nebraska?

[347] Yeah.

[348] Right.

[349] I'm thinking, have I said that?

[350] And this is 20 years ago.

[351] You don't have a Wikipedia page.

[352] You can't really do much diggy dig.

[353] I'm a little bit on edge, but I'm like, okay, all right.

[354] So I ask him a few more questions.

[355] I then ask him, well, why do you think it would be good for this job?

[356] And he starts telling me some of his skills, abilities.

[357] And he says, well, and I'm very organized.

[358] And I have a great memory.

[359] Like, I know your birthday is January 2nd, 1982.

[360] Hold on a second.

[361] You and I have the same birthday.

[362] Oh my birthday is actually the ninth.

[363] My dad was like, don't say your real birthday.

[364] Oh, so smart.

[365] So you use mine.

[366] That was interesting.

[367] Did your dad say to use my birthday?

[368] No, actually, I forgot that was your birthday.

[369] Of course.

[370] You shouldn't know my birthday, but yes, shittiest birthday in America.

[371] So he just has this grin on his face.

[372] Like he has said the best thing he could say.

[373] And my blood just runs cold.

[374] Facebook is not a thing.

[375] I think you had to still have a dot edu to be on there.

[376] And Google was not yet a verb.

[377] Like, we just didn't have a way to know this stuff about people.

[378] Yeah.

[379] So I'm freaked out.

[380] How big is he?

[381] Give us like a physical description of him.

[382] He was in his 20s.

[383] He was a fit guy, not overly imposing, I would say.

[384] I'm certain at this point he's here to murder me. Yeah.

[385] So I said, well, how are you liking D .C.?

[386] Just trying to like wrap it up.

[387] Hold on.

[388] Can I ask you one quick question before we get there?

[389] Yeah.

[390] What was your hesitation and asking him like, why do you know my birthday?

[391] Because I was a tiny.

[392] baby human.

[393] He was thinking about making someone else uncomfortable.

[394] This is probably like my sixth interview ever.

[395] Now I would have been like, excuse me?

[396] Right, right, right.

[397] At the time, I'm just uncomfortable.

[398] And you just want it to be done.

[399] Maybe I don't want any more interaction.

[400] Just leave.

[401] Beat it, it's great.

[402] I just said, you know, okay, all right, well, things are coming in.

[403] You know, how are you liking D .C.?

[404] And he said, it's great.

[405] I'm over on the hill.

[406] I really like that neighborhood.

[407] You're right over there too, right?

[408] You're at sixth in Maryland.

[409] He says as a state.

[410] Oh my God.

[411] He knows where I live.

[412] What the fuck?

[413] And I am just, so I shot out of that chair as fast as I could open the door.

[414] I was like, thanks for coming in.

[415] There's the exit.

[416] And I showed him to the door.

[417] I beeline into my boss's office, told her what had happened.

[418] She calls security.

[419] She calls the supervisor.

[420] Like, what just happened?

[421] How does this individual know this information about this?

[422] 20 -year -old woman who works in my office.

[423] God.

[424] Security and his supervisor pull him aside and talked to him.

[425] Turns out he had gone into a locked room, pulled my personnel file, and memorized it to impress me. No. Oh, you've got to hire him, especially if we're at CIA or FBI.

[426] This guy's already undercover.

[427] He's an operative.

[428] He did a bad job.

[429] He exposed.

[430] Yeah, he tipped his hand a lot.

[431] But still covert operation just to get the job.

[432] Whoa.

[433] Less impressive, more like serial killer vibes.

[434] Yeah.

[435] Did you move immediately?

[436] At the time, I lived with the very large individual.

[437] Okay.

[438] A brick shit house type of guy.

[439] Probably just praying some other suitor.

[440] He's so happy for this story.

[441] Yeah, please bring him up.

[442] What kind of trouble did he get in if he had obviously broken in and read shit that he shouldn't have?

[443] He got hired.

[444] Oh, God.

[445] Hold on.

[446] Hold on, Monica.

[447] Hold on, next.

[448] Stow your saber just for two seconds.

[449] Fine, it's stowed.

[450] Now, look, if he was a stalker, I'd be like, let's lock him up, right?

[451] So, A, I'm relieved he wasn't stalking her, been following her on the streets, found out where she worked, then decided I'm going to get a job there.

[452] Okay, so right there, I'm very relieved that wasn't the case.

[453] Secondly, and again, you can't do what he did, but a little sad because there's a desperation there that he wanted the job that bet he did that.

[454] That's compassionate.

[455] A little bit of compassion.

[456] That's very nice.

[457] He, of course, should lose his job for that.

[458] Okay.

[459] Okay, all right.

[460] Well, you know, and he'll learn his lesson.

[461] Actually, you know, it's fun about this one is I didn't anticipate someone having a story where they were the interviewer.

[462] I have since interviewed probably over 100 people and I have stories.

[463] Whoa.

[464] Is it something you enjoy or is it something you get through or is it something you hate?

[465] I enjoy it.

[466] I like talking to people.

[467] I like getting to know more about where they come from what they've been up to in their lives.

[468] But, you know, I've had people drunk.

[469] I've had people cry in interviews.

[470] You know, the gamut.

[471] Oh, wow.

[472] A, do you think you have good instincts?

[473] B, these people that impressed you in interviews, what percentage of the time did they turn out to be duds?

[474] They're just good interviewees.

[475] Because I feel really bad for people who aren't extroverts who have to interview for things.

[476] I imagine some of the most qualified people in the world never get hired because they don't have the kind of personality that can wow you or be a salesman.

[477] Absolutely.

[478] There is an art to interviewing.

[479] I have family members who I've coached through the interviewing process before, and they just...

[480] never win, you know?

[481] And it's steep, they're really great people, but interviewing is a bit of a game.

[482] You know, you guys do it for a living.

[483] It's a dance.

[484] I've been in interviews before where you ask a question and it's like, yes, no, you know, and you're sitting there, give me something to work with you.

[485] So of the ones that you thought were great, how many turn out to be complete duds?

[486] In early days, more than now.

[487] You know, I don't still interview right now, but you kind of hone in on that.

[488] Plus, you get to know the company better, you know, the job's better.

[489] You can kind of know what you're looking for.

[490] Right.

[491] I'd also imagine there's certain departments where you're lowering your expectations.

[492] Or you're interviewing a salesperson.

[493] Yeah.

[494] You're like, they better come in here and fucking have my pants off me. Right.

[495] Sure.

[496] You got the IT guy.

[497] You're going to be like, well, let's help him through talking.

[498] Or maybe the interview process is a little different.

[499] Like you have a practical thing.

[500] Oh, some challenges.

[501] Yeah, games.

[502] Well, absolutely.

[503] Because the person forward facing, do they have to work with other humans?

[504] Are they sitting in front of a computer and they can be by themselves in a corner?

[505] Sometimes they succeed at that, but you throw them on a sales floor, they are not succeeding.

[506] Right.

[507] Wow.

[508] Well, Ashley, what a great story.

[509] Thank you so much for sharing that with us.

[510] Absolutely.

[511] Thanks for letting me share it.

[512] Our pleasure.

[513] And I hope someone in your house gets just the tiniest bit of spackle.

[514] We don't need a lot of spackle.

[515] It's just, it's going to go over real easy.

[516] Just glaze over.

[517] Yep, just right there.

[518] All right.

[519] Have a great day.

[520] Yeah, great meeting you.

[521] All right.

[522] Bye, guys.

[523] Bye.

[524] Take care.

[525] Here's Brad.

[526] Last time it said Ashley.

[527] Now it says Bradley.

[528] He says Brad, you're like an opposite.

[529] I'm reading their Zoom names.

[530] Not the sheet.

[531] I don't even know my Zoom name.

[532] He's playing opposite games with us.

[533] Mine is Monica.

[534] Poopman.

[535] LP.

[536] Hello.

[537] How are you?

[538] Is this Brad or Bradley?

[539] Yeah.

[540] How's it going?

[541] Good.

[542] Do you have a preference between Brad or Bradley?

[543] Brad.

[544] Okay, Brad.

[545] We'll keep it short.

[546] Brad.

[547] You had a bad job interview?

[548] Yeah.

[549] Yeah, I did.

[550] Sorry, I'm a little nervous.

[551] Oh, that's all right.

[552] Everyone is.

[553] really excited to meet you guys.

[554] So hopefully this goes well.

[555] That's so nice.

[556] I graduated college end of 2018 and I was applying for my first career positions.

[557] I was sending out resumes and I got one interview opportunity back of like the dozens of places I applied for.

[558] It was probably the best one.

[559] So I was really excited for it.

[560] What degree had you gotten in college?

[561] Mechanical engineering.

[562] Oh, wonderful.

[563] I love hanging out with mechanical engineers.

[564] I do because I always have so many questions.

[565] I'll be like, ball bearings.

[566] How do they make a fucking steel ball that perfectly spherical?

[567] Is my dad a mechanical engineer?

[568] Well, he's a structural engineer, but is that different?

[569] They'd be like different majors.

[570] Okay.

[571] They're all pretty similar.

[572] So I got this interview.

[573] They sent me like a whole itinerary for it.

[574] It was supposed to be like a four -hour interview.

[575] An hour interview, and then they're going to take me to launch, and then do a tour of the place.

[576] I don't know if that's normal for these engineering firms to do an interview that long.

[577] I thought that was kind of crazy.

[578] Yeah, were you nervous about that?

[579] That's a lot of time to be like putting your best foot forward.

[580] Yeah, for sure.

[581] I was thinking they're not going to interview like hundreds of people if they're doing it for that long.

[582] That's true.

[583] Yeah, that's a really good deduction.

[584] The one thing was that they wanted me to do like a five -minute presentation to start the interview on myself and my related experience, which I kind of was surprised about because they knew I hadn't had.

[585] out of job before that.

[586] I knew I was just out of college.

[587] Yeah.

[588] I'm already really, really bad at interviews.

[589] Public speaking is probably the one thing I'm worse at.

[590] So it was like kind of two hells for me at once.

[591] Might I suggest, Brad, I mean, I got to imagine not to stereotype too badly, but certainly the engineering program is going to produce a lot of folks that probably aren't great at interviewing as opposed to a comm major or something, right?

[592] The bar's got to be a little low, doesn't it?

[593] Yeah, I definitely have felt like I do fit into that specific archetype where they've seen this before.

[594] I just have to be not terrible.

[595] I can do not that well, and they'll still be like, well.

[596] Guy's probably a genius.

[597] Exactly.

[598] So anyway, I get to the interview.

[599] I prepare my presentation.

[600] This guy meets me. He takes me upstairs to like a conference room.

[601] And there's like 12 people in there.

[602] They're all in full suits.

[603] At the time, I was like 22, I was a stoner and a barista, and it was like I walked into like a Wall Street job interview or something like I felt so out of place.

[604] So they had me start with the presentation, probably like 10 seconds into the interview.

[605] I think everyone in the room kind of knew it was over.

[606] Like, I was just every single type of nerves.

[607] I was like anxious.

[608] I was like mixing up my word.

[609] I was shaking.

[610] Oh, no. I could definitely feel like I had projected my discomfort onto the entire room.

[611] It was contagious.

[612] Yeah, I'm up there.

[613] I don't want to be there.

[614] They can see that.

[615] My voice is like cracking, and I, like, can't look anyone in the eye.

[616] And they're all, like, looking down.

[617] Oh, God.

[618] This is another Tim Robinson.

[619] It was supposed to go five minutes in how long.

[620] do you think it actually went?

[621] It was probably two.

[622] Two minutes?

[623] Yeah, I kind of was hoping that I would get less nervous throughout it, but just seeing just the whole situation didn't make me any less anxious.

[624] Oh, it's brutal.

[625] I finished that two minutes and it was supposed to be like, I do the presentation, they ask me questions about my, like, about it, and then they do the rest of the hour like actual interview questions, and then they take me lunch.

[626] The lunch piece is so horrible.

[627] Then you have to say, sit and eat in front of these people.

[628] Well, you've got a blind date on top of an interview.

[629] I bet there were only supposed to be like three people in the interview.

[630] And the rest of these people were like, oh, we're going to get a free lunch and like an hour off work if we come.

[631] I can't imagine, you know, like the thousands of dollars they're wasting on productivity to just like interview this one kid seems crazy.

[632] 20 year old kid, yeah.

[633] I think it was all for the lunch.

[634] But anyway, if I get through my presentation, there's just like, complete silence.

[635] No one has anything to say.

[636] And I just stand there.

[637] And then probably the oldest guy in the back speaks up and he's like, okay, I think we're good here.

[638] Oh.

[639] What?

[640] Before lunch?

[641] I think we're good here.

[642] Two and a half minutes in.

[643] Yeah.

[644] So like I said, I knew the interview was pretty much over.

[645] It was over for everyone.

[646] And then I think they knew I was just such an awkward kid.

[647] They didn't want to spend more time with me. Oh.

[648] It wasn't worth wasting the time, and I think it would just been easier for everyone if they just send me home.

[649] But my ego was like, this would be so sad if I didn't even get to the lunch, you know, like if I bombed a four -hour interview so bad.

[650] That they retracted the lunch offer.

[651] Exactly.

[652] So I should have said nothing because I wanted to go home just as bad as they did.

[653] Instead, I was like, well, weren't you supposed to take me to lunch?

[654] Oh, wow.

[655] Oh, wow.

[656] I don't know why I said that.

[657] Like, it was obviously like the most awkward thing.

[658] It's basically like going in for a kiss after the worst date ever, right?

[659] And so are we going to kiss now?

[660] I guess it was like a last shot where I was like, maybe it's not as bad as it feels and I'm not interpreting the situation correctly.

[661] We've all been there.

[662] Turning to the internet to self -diagnose our inexplicable pains, debilitating body aches, sudden fevers, and strange rashes.

[663] Though our minds tend to spiral to worst -case scenarios, it's usually nothing, but for an unlucky few, these unsuspecting symptoms can start the clock ticking on a terrifying medical mystery.

[664] Like the unexplainable death of a retired firefighter, whose body was found at home by his son, except it looked like he had been cremated, or the time when an entire town started showing jumping from buildings and seeing tigers on their ceilings.

[665] Hey, listeners, it's Mr. Ballin here, and I'm here to tell you about my podcast.

[666] It's called Mr. Ballin's Medical Mysteries.

[667] Each terrifying true story will be sure to keep you up at night.

[668] Follow Mr. Ballin's Medical Mysteries wherever you get your podcasts.

[669] Prime members can listen early and ad -free on Amazon Music.

[670] What's up, guys?

[671] It's your girl Kiki, and my podcast is back with a new season, and let me tell you, it's too good, and I'm diving into the brains of entertainment.

[672] best and brightest, okay?

[673] Every episode, I bring on a friend and have a real conversation.

[674] And I don't mean just friends.

[675] I mean the likes of Amy Poehler, Kel Mitchell, Vivica Fox.

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[677] So follow, watch, and listen to Baby.

[678] This is Kiki Palmer on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast.

[679] So there's like a silence and then the same guy who spoke before, I think he decided to like take one for the team and he's like, yeah, I guess I could take you to lunch.

[680] So instead of all of them taking me to lunch, Just this one guy.

[681] Oh, the senior member of the team.

[682] This is so uncomfortable.

[683] Oh, my God.

[684] This is where it gets really fun.

[685] He decides we're going to go to the place across the street.

[686] I think that's, like, the shortest distance, minimum amount of time.

[687] We walked downstairs to the lobby, and I think when I came in, I came in through a regular door, but there's a revolving door in the lobby, and basically what happens is it's going to seem like I've never been in revolving door in my life that I definitely have.

[688] I do know how they work and everything, but he walks in, and I'm behind him, and I'm going to walk in behind him, but my brain is like not working normally.

[689] It never does in interviews.

[690] I have this panic where I'm like, do you get into his pie slice or do you wait for the next pie slice?

[691] Exactly, exactly.

[692] Do I go in with him?

[693] Is it one of the big ones where like a whole family can go in there?

[694] With a stroller.

[695] Is it rude of me to wait and go after him, I guess?

[696] And so I'm going to wait, and then last minute, I just run in there with him.

[697] I don't think he knew I was in there.

[698] I don't think he expected me to go in there.

[699] So I'm in there, and I realize that's not big enough for the two of us.

[700] I'm behind him.

[701] facing his back, I can fit about two inches of air in between my front, his back, and then my back in the door behind us, right?

[702] So I realize as I'm getting there, I can't walk.

[703] I have to shuffle so I don't run into him.

[704] This whole thing probably takes like five seconds, but it was like years in my head.

[705] So I'm like shuffling behind him, trying not to like graze his backside so he doesn't know I'm there.

[706] With your pelvis, nuts to butt.

[707] We're about halfway and we're in like that interstitial purgatory space.

[708] The heel of my shoe catches the back of the door and the door stops.

[709] He stops.

[710] It catches my shoe and I tripped and I fall forward.

[711] Oh, my God.

[712] And I pin him against the door.

[713] And so we're like stuck in there.

[714] Oh, my fucking.

[715] Yeah, so he doesn't know I'm in there and all of a sudden knocked him and pushed him against the door.

[716] Yeah, because he's got forward momentum and then the door in front of him stops on a dime because of your shoe.

[717] So first he collides into that door and then you smack into him from behind.

[718] He doesn't even know you're, it's all very jarring because he doesn't know why you're here.

[719] I get myself off of him and he just turns back and he just looks at me. He doesn't know what happened.

[720] I was like, oops.

[721] sorry, you know.

[722] And then we got through the door and we went to lunch.

[723] Oh, my God.

[724] How blessed both of you.

[725] Yeah, and we didn't talk about anything that just happened, you know.

[726] It was just awkward conversation.

[727] That was the end of the interview, but there's one more part.

[728] A couple months later, a friend of my dad works at this firm, but it's like a big firm.

[729] They probably have like 10 ,000 employees.

[730] I hadn't told my dad.

[731] I didn't tell any of my family of what happened.

[732] happened because I was like so ashamed and I also like I hadn't got a job after this I was like afraid I'd never be able to handle another interview but anyway I run into this family friend and he goes like I heard you interviewed at my company a couple months ago and I was like yeah it didn't go well and he was like yeah I heard apparently that story got like passed around I don't know what parts he heard I didn't like ask but I can guess that that revolving door that guy definitely came back.

[733] He's like, that weird kid fucking jump me inside the revolving door.

[734] I think he wedged his shoe in there so I would fall and then he got on me. Oh, man. I think the kid was a pederist.

[735] Oh, my God.

[736] Have you found gainful employment as an engineer?

[737] Yeah, it took a while.

[738] I've had a lot of bad interviews, but I had a couple that were good enough.

[739] Passable.

[740] Yeah.

[741] Once you have the experience, then that kind of speaks for itself.

[742] Brett, we were just interviewing a gal who conducts interviews and I was saying it's really not very telling how someone performs an interview versus how good they're going to be in the job and this is a case point I'm sure you're a great engineer and they just need to fucking put you on the desk and give you a task yeah that's what they need to do the interview for you should be here's this task we think is solvable in three hours can you do it I mean I think they are trying to test a bare minimum amount of social skills that I didn't meet also yeah they put me under way too much You should have done, since you were a barista in the PowerPoint, like a little dancing cup.

[743] It could have been about you as a barista, and that would have been charming.

[744] People should come to me for advice on their PowerPoints.

[745] I wonder how many of the folks in the room had ordered a coffee from you.

[746] I bet some people were like...

[747] I recognize this boy.

[748] I recognize him, but out of context.

[749] I don't know what's going on, which probably just made it all that more eerie.

[750] This interview was back home.

[751] I worked in Minnesota at that time.

[752] Oh, okay.

[753] But my dad is an engineer in towns.

[754] People probably heard this story.

[755] My dad probably is embarrassed by that story a little bit.

[756] He wouldn't be embarrassed.

[757] It would make him love you 5X.

[758] I know when my kids have a real challenge like that, all that happens is my heart breaks and I love them more.

[759] Fair enough.

[760] Well, Brad, thanks for telling that.

[761] That was fantastic.

[762] I did not see a revolving door coming down the road.

[763] That was a plot twist.

[764] Well, it's so nice me. Thanks for telling us that story.

[765] Appreciate it so much.

[766] Thanks for having me. Hi.

[767] What a cutie pie.

[768] I could see falling in love with him.

[769] That was a riot.

[770] Really, really, really funny.

[771] Okay.

[772] Cameron.

[773] Cam?

[774] I'm just kidding.

[775] Hello.

[776] Can you hear me?

[777] Oh, wonderfully.

[778] Are you Cameron or Cam?

[779] I go by Cammy usually.

[780] Cammy.

[781] Even better.

[782] Third option.

[783] I take all three, depending on the scenario, but Cammy works here.

[784] If you were in.

[785] trouble as a child, what would your mother say?

[786] You can take a guess.

[787] Cameron?

[788] Cameron?

[789] Middle name.

[790] Cameron Taylor.

[791] Oh.

[792] Cameron Taylor.

[793] Yeah, you're in big trouble when you hear Cameron Taylor.

[794] Where are you at in America?

[795] I am just outside of D .C. currently.

[796] Oh, okay.

[797] In Maryland or Virginia?

[798] Virginia.

[799] Oh, wonderful.

[800] So you had a bad job interview?

[801] Yes.

[802] So it might be a little deviated from what you've heard so far, maybe, but it was a nannying interview.

[803] Okay.

[804] Monica, I feel like this is kind of fun for you, because it was for a high -profile family.

[805] I knew nothing about the situation.

[806] Basically, to set the scene, it was 2016.

[807] I was 23 years old.

[808] On the tail end of like a five -year relationship that it was kind of obvious things weren't working out.

[809] You made it all the way through college from high school, but now it was unraveling.

[810] Yeah, and I had been a nanny and a babysitter for years, so I'm like, let me fall back on what I know.

[811] So I jump on this website that I've used forever to find a job within that field.

[812] and I see something that I'm like, this feels like a scam.

[813] This one was listed for 150 to 200K, housing included, everything included.

[814] Whoa.

[815] They're going to get their pick of the litter.

[816] Right.

[817] And it was for one child, but you didn't know any information about the family.

[818] And this was in Texas.

[819] I'm going to not share any distinct details about the family because I'm terrified of them.

[820] So I reach out.

[821] It's through a nannying agency, and I'm like, hey, is this a scam?

[822] And they're like, no, but today is the last day you can get your application.

[823] And so jump on it if you're going to do it.

[824] I send in all my info.

[825] I feel pretty confident.

[826] You know, I have a great history and lots of experience.

[827] They accept it.

[828] And then I move forward with interviews.

[829] So these are all Zoom interviews.

[830] I do, I think it was like five interviews with the agency with these two women.

[831] I kind of get a little rundown of what the position's going to look like.

[832] So it's this one girl.

[833] She's 15 months at the time.

[834] Family is looking for like 24 hours a daycare.

[835] basically.

[836] They're looking to hire two people, but have that be split up between two people.

[837] I wasn't allowed to know anything about the father, which should have been a red flag, but that will come later in the story.

[838] So I interview with these two women.

[839] They're very sweet, but they're like, you have to wear these clothes.

[840] Your hair has to look this way.

[841] Your makeup has to look this way.

[842] Your nail polish, everything.

[843] And I'm like, for the money, I will do it.

[844] I don't care.

[845] Whatever.

[846] I got student loans to take care of.

[847] Can I ask really quick what state you were in at that point?

[848] Massachusetts.

[849] Oh, okay.

[850] So I went to school in Cambridge at this little liberal arts school, so I was in that area.

[851] No, I don't know.

[852] Ben and Maddie, you knew that was coming.

[853] I'm glad you said.

[854] But anyways, they had me send in a video to present to the mother where I have to wear all the right clothing, very neutral, not much makeup.

[855] They don't want me to be, like, showy.

[856] Right.

[857] I sent that in.

[858] I get to the level of interview where I do the interview with the mother.

[859] She seems super nice, maybe a little off, but they want me to be having.

[860] focus on a Montessori education for the child.

[861] They had built a Montessori school on the campus of their home for their child, just the poor girl, like going to school by herself.

[862] Oh, my God.

[863] And the background info I got from the agency was that they had fired the previous Montessori teacher, which I wasn't even going to be the teacher, just a nanny, but they had fired the previous Montessori teacher because she told them that the daughter wasn't on track for Ivy League, which was their goal.

[864] At 15 months?

[865] At 15 months?

[866] months.

[867] I hate this.

[868] I know, right?

[869] I'm catching the vibe here and there.

[870] So I pass.

[871] They fly me out.

[872] It was a Friday morning flight.

[873] It all felt okay.

[874] I literally had went and bought a new wardrobe.

[875] You know, I just only hit Old Navy.

[876] I'm just going to get what I need for the weekend because they were like no tight clothing, only neutrals.

[877] This is what she likes, the mother.

[878] My flight was super, super delayed.

[879] And I had that gut feeling like there's a reason this is happening.

[880] But I reached out to the agency I'm like, listen, I'm not going to get in until 9 p .m. now, and I don't know if it's worth their time to have me there just for a short while.

[881] And they're like, nope, it's scheduled, you're going.

[882] There was a little fear on their part.

[883] So I get in to Austin.

[884] One of the women from the agency is at the airport to brief me. I'm given this big folder of information and I'm on my way.

[885] I was told that when I get there, I will be staying at one of their homes in the neighborhood and that the key will be in a specific place.

[886] The nanny that currently lived there was on vacation So it was just going to be me in the house.

[887] I got there.

[888] I made it.

[889] But the key was nowhere to be found.

[890] So that felt really icky and I was a little nervous.

[891] I finally found the key and it was a round back in the door.

[892] Hiding in plain sight.

[893] Right.

[894] So I'm like, is someone in the house?

[895] I'm a little nervous about that.

[896] But also I'm not a scared person.

[897] So I just go in.

[898] I reached out to the mom and told her that I made it and she was like, great.

[899] And I told her that the key wasn't where it was.

[900] And she had just like skipped over that and told me what the morning was going to entail, like, here's where you get into the house, go through these gates.

[901] Are you in their house, or are you, like, completely on another piece of property in another house they own?

[902] Exactly.

[903] So I was under the impression.

[904] They had multiple homes in this neighborhood, and they were for housing the staff.

[905] Right.

[906] So I'm in one of the homes for the staff.

[907] I'm dying to know who it is.

[908] Right.

[909] And I'm like, I just got to get through the night, barely slept at all, very stressed out.

[910] I show up to their house, gorgeous, gorgeous mansion, as you would assume, the mother is not awake yet.

[911] I think it was probably nine or ten, but I'm introduced to the current nanny.

[912] She is Mexican, which is important to note because throughout my time there, I heard a lot of derogatory terms towards the household staff, which was like, again, another like, ooh, what's happening here?

[913] But she took me around in the golf cart, around town, and kind of show me what their day looks like with the daughter.

[914] It was just the three of us.

[915] And it was nice.

[916] I didn't feel quite on the level with her to be like, what's the deal here?

[917] Are you here being here being held against your will.

[918] What's the deal?

[919] We ended up meeting up with the mother at an estate sale where I'm watching her just fly checks off that are like beyond what I could even fathom.

[920] And I encounter my first very strange experience where she is talking to a neighbor and the nanny whips out hand sanitizer.

[921] She's just sitting there waiting for the conversation to end.

[922] This is very much pre -COVID, mind you.

[923] And the conversation ends and the mother just turns to the nanny and she sprays her down right in front of the woman.

[924] And I'm like, what is happening?

[925] We then get back to the house.

[926] We order Dairy Queen grill burgers for lunch.

[927] Raise your burgers.

[928] Yep.

[929] The mother orders her is without meat and cheese.

[930] Bun sandwich, okay.

[931] Yes.

[932] And then I meets the father.

[933] He's very cowboy -y, not what I would have matched up with the level of money that I'm seeing here.

[934] I'm told that he puts the daughter down for nap and he does it monitor off.

[935] And it takes about an hour.

[936] And I'm like, ooh, okay.

[937] I get his name, so I'm like Googling on my phone because I want to look him up.

[938] So you didn't know.

[939] These people are rich, obviously, and in public.

[940] But it wasn't like when you heard the names, you were like, oh, it's those people.

[941] No, see, like, I'm hoping it's some cool celebrities.

[942] Right.

[943] Yeah, Matthew McConaughey.

[944] Right.

[945] Right.

[946] And I'm like looking up what celebrities are in this area of Texas.

[947] No, it wasn't anything like that.

[948] For my deductive reasoning, after it all, I think they were very big oil and cattle money.

[949] Oh.

[950] But anyways, I look up his name.

[951] The first thing that popped up on Google was his sex offender profile.

[952] So I'm like, oh, this really, really does not feel good, especially what I just said about, like, nap time.

[953] Yes.

[954] Oh, God.

[955] And I'm, like, peeved at the nanny agency at this point, because I'm like, despite a divorce, you need to vet both people.

[956] So the nanny shows me around.

[957] She shows me in the basement that they have a duplicate of every single toy this child has, down to, like, the sweater on a teddy bearing.

[958] case it goes missing.

[959] She shows me the diaper bag, which has bags within bags within bags in it, depending on the level of tantrum that the child might have.

[960] So I have to know which bag to take out dependence upon the scenario, okay?

[961] So lots of pressure for me. And she's making it all sound very normal.

[962] And I'm like, you must have been doing this for a long time to have felt that this is a normalized situation.

[963] Standard childhood.

[964] I'm not terribly optimistic for this child.

[965] Me either.

[966] I feel really.

[967] It's so weird to think about being born into great wealth is a form of potential abuse.

[968] You know, like this is worse than growing up in poverty.

[969] Well, at least the poverty I grew up in.

[970] Yeah, I'd rather have my story.

[971] Yeah, it's just weird all around.

[972] So I'm eventually left alone with mom, like the nanny goes home.

[973] The plan is that we're going to go to the husband's ranch.

[974] So the mother, the husband, myself, and the child.

[975] We all take the car together.

[976] They argue the whole time.

[977] So it's very uncomfortable for me. I'm trying to level which bag to pull out of the diaper bag on the ride over.

[978] We get there, and it's just a bunch of buddies drinking beers by their trucks.

[979] It's like I've entered a different world at this point.

[980] The dog catches an armadillo, which I've never even seen an armadillo before in my life.

[981] And then the little girl wanted to play Ring Around the Rosie.

[982] I had to hold the father's hand for that after I've just learned this information about him.

[983] To end the night, they want to go pig calling in the field.

[984] So we jump on the ATV.

[985] It's me, mom, dad, and the child.

[986] And we are literally driving through a field while they're drinking, calling out like, suey.

[987] Oh, my gosh.

[988] This is like a black mirror episode now.

[989] It really feels that way.

[990] And I was like, how do I consolidate all of this into 15 minutes?

[991] Because every time I tell people this story, they're like, you're writing a book, right?

[992] And I'm like, yeah, I'm working on it.

[993] That was bizarre.

[994] It ended with the mom peeing next to the car before.

[995] we took off for the night.

[996] I'm seeing too much crazy happen, even for the money.

[997] This is not a thing.

[998] I'm not doing this.

[999] Yeah.

[1000] It's just the mother and I and the child.

[1001] We drive home.

[1002] The husband stays at the ranch.

[1003] This is like 9 p .m. at this point.

[1004] The chefs have made all this food for us for dinner.

[1005] The mother is like, take what you want.

[1006] The daughter has now been sat down to watch a movie.

[1007] And I'm like, great, does she need anything?

[1008] Can I get her water?

[1009] Can I get her food?

[1010] What can I do?

[1011] She's like, no, no, no, no, no. Go home.

[1012] You need to rest.

[1013] You've done your part today.

[1014] We're so grateful.

[1015] She assures me I am all set.

[1016] I get to the house.

[1017] I text the mother.

[1018] I say, I'm home.

[1019] Thanks so much for a great day.

[1020] Good night.

[1021] I'll see you in the morning because I had another day with them.

[1022] I then call my sister, I FaceTime her, and I'm just debriefing the whole day.

[1023] Like, holy crap.

[1024] What did I just experience?

[1025] Can you please talk this out with me?

[1026] And she's like, yeah, I get it.

[1027] I wouldn't take that either because I'm like, there's no way I'm doing this.

[1028] After I hang up the phone with my sister, a slew of texts start coming into my phone.

[1029] from the mother that are like, thank you so much for your time today.

[1030] You were wonderful.

[1031] You're an angel.

[1032] The follow -up text, less than a minute later.

[1033] You are so terrible.

[1034] We don't want you here tomorrow.

[1035] Do not show up.

[1036] One of our staff members is sick, but we're better off without you.

[1037] I'm not responding.

[1038] Next minute.

[1039] You were such a good helper.

[1040] Our daughter loved you.

[1041] We couldn't be more grateful.

[1042] What?

[1043] I'm telling you, like, I have all the screenshots, too, because I saved them immediately to send to the agency to be like, hey, just got to corroborate what's going on here in case she comes at me. She used the term, luckily, we have jolly souls who work for us, and you are not one of them.

[1044] I'm like, come on.

[1045] Wow, wow, wow, wow.

[1046] She's on her own mental ride, I guess.

[1047] It was erratic, to say the least.

[1048] I'm feeling like there might be something underlying here.

[1049] And also that I'm being watched.

[1050] There is a 100 % certainty that there are cameras in this house, because there's no shot that I get this good night text, like, great, good night.

[1051] wonderful and then I hang up with my sister and then this onslaught of text comes to right she heard she heard but then why'd she go back to being nice again it's a back and forth for sure but I really just don't think she would have come at me like that had she not been listening heard you talk to your sister yeah yeah I contacted the agency immediately I'm like hey number one her husband's a sex offender number two here's how my day went here the text so I woke up in the morning I slyly drove to their house and slipped my checkout of the mailbox and I continued on to Austin and that was it.

[1052] The agency was like, this is absolutely unacceptable.

[1053] We're going to talk to the mother about this.

[1054] I'm like, you're going to drop her as a client, right?

[1055] Because this is just not okay.

[1056] No, they're just going to talk to her.

[1057] Well, with the level of money, yeah, I think that's probably all that happened.

[1058] But yeah, it was crazy.

[1059] Wow.

[1060] Very twilight zoning.

[1061] That's bonkers.

[1062] Yeah.

[1063] Oh, my Lord.

[1064] My favorite part might be that they have shableness.

[1065] and that they order Brazier burgers without the hamburger.

[1066] Dad heard it was so strange that they would even eat that.

[1067] And not eat it.

[1068] Just the buns?

[1069] Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.

[1070] Cammy, that was insane.

[1071] I'm glad you made it out of there.

[1072] Me too.

[1073] And it's full circle.

[1074] My nanny is downstairs with my son right now.

[1075] So I'm like, I will never be putting anyone through an experience like that myself.

[1076] You should start sending her some erratic text.

[1077] Well, great meeting you, Cammy.

[1078] Thanks for sharing.

[1079] Yeah, thank you guys.

[1080] All right, take care.

[1081] Crazy job interviews.

[1082] Oh, wow.

[1083] There it is.

[1084] I'm trying to think if I've had any crazies.

[1085] I mean, I've interviewed as a nanny for a lot of people.

[1086] You have?

[1087] Yeah, I used to nanny a ton.

[1088] Well, I know, but I thought you were kind of gainfully employed through most of it.

[1089] I was, but I would have so many families.

[1090] I would juggle fams.

[1091] Oh, okay.

[1092] Sometimes you would get weird vibes in people's houses.

[1093] Yeah, yeah.

[1094] Maybe it reminds me of being a kid when you'd go over to a friend's house and you're sussing out with the vibe and there is.

[1095] And sometimes it was just off.

[1096] Bad.

[1097] Icky.

[1098] Oh, well.

[1099] Of course, now I want to know who that is.

[1100] Me too.

[1101] I was expecting it to be one of the tech people.

[1102] In my mind, I was like the Dell Empire is down there.

[1103] Who would have this much money with multiple houses?

[1104] President Flyer Private down to have this meeting.

[1105] I thought Ted Cruz at first.

[1106] Oh, that would have been good.

[1107] He doesn't have kids that young, though.

[1108] Well, I'm glad that you and I don't have to interview for a job.

[1109] It's same.

[1110] Yeah, very grateful, very grateful.

[1111] I love you.

[1112] Love you.

[1113] Do you want to sing a tune or something?

[1114] We know a theme song.

[1115] Oh.

[1116] Okay, great.

[1117] We don't have a thing song for this new show, so here I go, go, go.

[1118] We're going to ask some random questions.

[1119] And with the help of our Jerry's book and some suggestions, On the fire rhyme dish Enjoy Follow armchair expert on the Wondry app Amazon music or wherever you get your podcasts You can listen to every episode of Armchair Expert early and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.

[1120] Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry .com slash survey.