Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend XX
[0] Summer Smoors with Conan and the Chill Chums, a six -part series with Conan O 'Brien, Sonam Obsessian, and Matt Gourley.
[1] Let's get started.
[2] Hello, and welcome to a very special episode of Conan O 'Brien Needs a Friend, series of shows, something we attempted once before, I think two years ago, called Conan and the Chill Chums.
[3] Nope.
[4] Nope.
[5] Summer Smoors with Conan and the Chil Chums.
[6] Yeah.
[7] Oh, okay.
[8] How's that obsessive compulsive disorder coming?
[9] How's that asshole Galactica syndrome coming?
[10] What a nice start to a lovely summer day.
[11] We started two years ago with a segment called, I'm sorry, summer smores with Conan and the Chilchums.
[12] I think it began when we had a conversation about smores.
[13] That's right.
[14] I maintained that smores blow that nobody really likes them.
[15] That's a very flawed American treat.
[16] And just, sorry, you've got to calm down a little bit.
[17] And then we'll get, you can build up to a rage.
[18] But for now, we talked about it.
[19] And then it became this series where we just, it's just the three of us, chew in the fat.
[20] And what we thought we'd do is we'd start in studio today.
[21] And this would be the first episode.
[22] But then we would move to an outdoor summer locale.
[23] Where we can literally have a campfire.
[24] Yes, we're going to have an actual camp.
[25] campfire.
[26] And so I can't think of anything more exciting than listening to people who were inside now being outside and having a fire.
[27] And I think that's the kind of excitement we bring to people.
[28] I think there's a coziness to that that people will find.
[29] I agree.
[30] I don't know why you took it to be a sarcastic tone in my voice.
[31] Maybe it was the look on your face.
[32] No, not at all.
[33] I had a stroke a few years ago.
[34] It's made me look very skeptical and like I've just had a mouthful of shit.
[35] anyway You mean smores So what we're going to do is That's the environment I've always wanted for this summer Oh my God So what we're going to do is we're going to start Today's episode Summer Smoors with Conan and the Chill Chums That would be Matt and Sona We're going to start it here in our studio Our brand new spanking studio And then we're going to move to an outdoor location Are you comfortable saying where we're going to go, Matt?
[36] Yeah and I think Because I had big ideas about us going to Yellowstone I thought it would be really cool if we went up to the Pacific Northwest maybe to the San Juan Islands Just some amazing Maybe up to northern Maine Up there in the far reaches Up near the Canadian border So I had all these great ideas And I told you Money's no object The sky's the limit What did you come up with Matt?
[37] My backyard Your backyard And I'm gonna pocket that travel money Oh yeah Because I did you did ask for the cash You asked for the cash up front No well we've got our I gave you $600 ,000 to work this out, and now we're doing it in your backyard.
[38] Because I got a little, I got a new park bench.
[39] We did talk about the fact that you live on the west side.
[40] Both Sona and I live on the east side in the Dinas.
[41] And that's two to one.
[42] We have a lot of people listening who don't know what the Dinas are.
[43] So let's tell them.
[44] You're talking about your Pasadena, your Alt Dina.
[45] Yeah.
[46] Your Dina and DeLuca.
[47] I mean, these are places on the far east side of the Los Angeles.
[48] metropolitan area.
[49] Is that true?
[50] I wouldn't say the far east side in the greater scheme of things.
[51] Sona lives.
[52] I've been to Sona's house.
[53] It took several days to get there.
[54] Three boroughs died underneath me. It's way, way out there.
[55] You're the far one.
[56] The greater community of this world here that we live and work in lives on the east, where you live far on the west.
[57] Yeah, yeah.
[58] Whose name is in the title in the show?
[59] Friend?
[60] Rupert Friend?
[61] Jesus, you're weird What an odd fellow Okay I'm as you know I'm a democratic man And I believe in You know The power of different voices Being raised And then letting the majority rule I've always felt that way So we're going to go to your house Which is in Pasadena Yeah And we're going to be in your backyard Yeah I don't remember there being a backyard Well, you haven't been in it.
[62] Okay.
[63] You came over one time when we recorded that quarantine episode and you guys came in the front door and we recorded and you left the front door.
[64] Right.
[65] Back when people thought COVID was going to be a thing.
[66] Back in those early paranoid days.
[67] We showed that.
[68] Two and a half years ago.
[69] Anyway, I do remember that.
[70] That was very strange because I remember we all gathered there and we thought, what is this COVID thing?
[71] I guess if you gather in groups of like five, you can't get it.
[72] This was early on.
[73] We didn't know anything about it.
[74] This is back when we were being told, wipe down all your groceries.
[75] Right.
[76] Because COVID is spread by touching a box of Lucky Charms that just came from a Rouse.
[77] Like, we didn't know anything.
[78] No, and we didn't really touch each other.
[79] There are half of us that were.
[80] I kept trying to touch you.
[81] Yeah, that was part of the reason we want to move this outside.
[82] But we wouldn't touch each other, but we'd be in the same room.
[83] Remember that?
[84] And then it later turned out that, right, that doesn't work.
[85] But there were early days.
[86] We didn't know.
[87] and here we are now two and a half years later, and we're going to return to your house.
[88] Triumphant.
[89] We're triumphant.
[90] And we are going to celebrate summer s'mores with Conan and the Chill Chums.
[91] I thought in order to prepare us, it might be good to add some summer sounds right now, even though we're in studio.
[92] So maybe we could start with those jocadas, you know?
[93] Yeah, so you want those 17 -year gestating insects that come up from the ground and make a really harsh, noise.
[94] No. How about that, just that grasshoppery sound?
[95] Oh, okay, sure.
[96] Yeah, the chirping of grasshoppers.
[97] I'd like there to be.
[98] So let's start with that.
[99] Let's lay that in.
[100] Do you want to suggest something?
[101] Yeah.
[102] I'm, I'm, I'm, no. No. No. You don't have any summer sound?
[103] I have no summer sound.
[104] Come on.
[105] I really, I don't.
[106] I don't know.
[107] You're talking about sounds.
[108] How about?
[109] Yeah.
[110] What do you talk?
[111] Are you even listening to me?
[112] I barely hear.
[113] I'm so sorry.
[114] I barely here.
[115] Can I just point, can I tell people what's happening?
[116] Sona, just before we went on Mike found out that she neglected to make a hair appointment with, I guess, this guru who knows how to do very curly hair and all of her appointments book up immediately at the first of the month.
[117] They do.
[118] You found out seconds before we went on Mike, and I think you haven't been listening to a word I've said because you're thinking about your curly hair.
[119] No idea what's going on.
[120] I'm sorry.
[121] I really care and I want, but all I'm thinking about is how I have to wait so much longer now for appointments to open up.
[122] What does she do that you can't get done anywhere else?
[123] I'm serious.
[124] She just knows curly hair.
[125] She just knows how to cut curly hair.
[126] But no one else does?
[127] You can't go to any schmow and be like, can you cut my hair?
[128] And like, summer's coming up.
[129] I just got highlights.
[130] All I was thinking about was how nice the new curls would look with the highlights.
[131] And now I'm like, ugh.
[132] And you're talking.
[133] Plus, you've got a big event coming up.
[134] Yeah, I do.
[135] You've got a big event, which is the christening of your two boys, your twins, Mikey and Charlie.
[136] I will be at that ceremony.
[137] You're the godfather.
[138] I'm the godfather.
[139] He has the most important job.
[140] Oh, come on.
[141] Why would you do that?
[142] You of all people should know.
[143] What are you thinking?
[144] I don't know what I was thinking.
[145] So I'm going to wear a ceremonial robe.
[146] This is true.
[147] Yeah, I'm wearing a ceremonial robe.
[148] Yeah, he is.
[149] I am.
[150] I am and I have to say certain things in Armenian.
[151] And you just sent me the text today with the pronunciations.
[152] Yes.
[153] Did you send me a vocal track to?
[154] I did.
[155] Yeah.
[156] So I have to learn how to say these different things.
[157] It is not an easy language.
[158] It's not.
[159] It is not.
[160] But it's not a lot of stuff that you have to say.
[161] But, yeah, I'm really sorry I'm not paying attention.
[162] Did also, did you say chickadeas?
[163] Isn't it cicadas?
[164] It's cicadas, yeah.
[165] But if it's a girl, it's a chick.
[166] What if what they sent you in Armenian is just like you and Armenian saying, I, Conan, O 'Brien, hereby decree all my property.
[167] Yeah, that's what she's going to do.
[168] Sona has worked it out so that I'm basically, all of my income and all of my holdings are being transferred to the Monsessian family.
[169] Icon and O 'Brien promise never to be the godfather of these two children.
[170] Yeah, and never to go near them again.
[171] So anyway.
[172] Sorry, I'm sorry I wasn't paying attention.
[173] We got some good information out just with that.
[174] That was, because you weren't paying attention, we learned that your hair is very aggressively curly and needs a special treatment to be ungrown.
[175] I wouldn't say aggressively.
[176] Grasshoppers have been chirping this whole time.
[177] So if we want to layer anything else.
[178] Oh, let's layer something else in.
[179] with like an owl.
[180] Okay.
[181] An occasional owl?
[182] That'll come in three, two, one.
[183] Sorry, that was a hawk.
[184] Hold on.
[185] Three, two, one.
[186] You probably don't even need to put that in because there's probably owls where you live anyway.
[187] There are owls where we live.
[188] Yeah, ours too.
[189] Okay, but instead of that owl, you know the way owls are supposed to be really smart, there's a symbol of wisdom.
[190] Can you occasionally, between the regular owl sounds, can you just add, ooh, I'm smart, I'm smart.
[191] Oh, that's stupid.
[192] Just occasionally.
[193] You got it.
[194] I'll take that sound bite.
[195] Ooh.
[196] I'm well educated.
[197] And give me the I'm smart against so I have it clean.
[198] Ooh.
[199] I'm smart.
[200] I'm smart.
[201] You got it.
[202] Um.
[203] I'm smart.
[204] I'm smart.
[205] How about an occasional, like a bear just rustling around on the blueberry bushes?
[206] Yeah, I'll put some blueberry bushes in too.
[207] Well, they make a sound.
[208] There's sort of a rustle, rustle.
[209] You got it.
[210] Or just audio from Kurt Russell.
[211] Oh.
[212] I don't care.
[213] I'm on a roll.
[214] I'm on fire.
[215] How can you tell that it's a blueberry bush?
[216] They have a dis.
[217] You'll see.
[218] And you know the audio from Kurt Will so I'm going to do is the one from Tombstone where he goes, you tell him I'm coming for him or whatever it is.
[219] And I'm bringing and hell's coming with me. And hell's coming with me. You tell him I'm coming.
[220] And hell's coming with me, you hear.
[221] Hell's coming with me. Oh, God.
[222] What a great movie.
[223] I said.
[224] I know.
[225] You haven't seen it.
[226] I know.
[227] Tack's really upset about it.
[228] But I will.
[229] Okay.
[230] I'm doing my best to keep us on track here.
[231] It's like hurting kittens, one with very curly hair that needs a cut.
[232] Now that you said I need a cut, that's all I can think of.
[233] You've got to stop bringing it up.
[234] Well, okay.
[235] So I am preparing us to be outdoors by creating in studio.
[236] We've added some sounds.
[237] We're listening to them right now.
[238] I'm smart.
[239] Maybe a lone coyote.
[240] Sure.
[241] Oh, do you hear him in the distance?
[242] I do.
[243] It's spooky.
[244] That's cool.
[245] I should say this.
[246] I should say yes.
[247] So Pasadena.
[248] And this will be at night as well.
[249] Oh, that's cool.
[250] Starting at 7 and then we're going to, you know, record for a while.
[251] Yeah.
[252] Can people tell where it's at night?
[253] Sure.
[254] Well, first of all, it's 7 in L .A. in the summer, there's only six more hours of daylight.
[255] So, yeah, it'll only be 98 degrees.
[256] What a great.
[257] And in Pasadena, by the way, can I just say so hot.
[258] Pasadena is a frying pan.
[259] You know.
[260] We can start later if we want.
[261] It's.
[262] It's going to be 83 that day.
[263] So around 7 we're probably looking at, you know, mid -70s.
[264] As my wife says, early and late 70s.
[265] What?
[266] For temperature.
[267] She says that?
[268] Yeah, like, what's the temperature today?
[269] It's the early 70s.
[270] Wow.
[271] So as hot as it was when Nixon was in his first term.
[272] It's 1971 out there.
[273] That's the late 70s.
[274] What's the temperature today?
[275] Watergate hearings.
[276] The cars just released their solo album.
[277] It's 1979.
[278] It's the late 70s.
[279] I think we've got some nice summer sounds.
[280] Yeah.
[281] Maybe off in the distance we hear a hobo, blowing and playing his harmonica by the train tracks.
[282] Oh, that's nice.
[283] Isn't that nice?
[284] Way, way off there.
[285] It's an old hobo.
[286] He's just had a can of beans.
[287] Yeah.
[288] And he lit up that little piece of a stokey he had.
[289] Yeah.
[290] That's nice.
[291] Now I am going to put a moratorium on this because this is a lot of work for me. Well, whatever.
[292] No sweat off my back.
[293] No. I'll be comfortably at home on the west side when you're slaving away in one of the Dinas.
[294] For my money, nothing beats a fire.
[295] I agree.
[296] I don't mean like a warehouse fire because that can get out of control.
[297] I mean, I'll stop and watch one of those, especially if I started it.
[298] But no, I love a roaring fire.
[299] I really do.
[300] A fire in the fireplace or a campfire.
[301] I think life's best moments happen around a roaring fire.
[302] And I'm always hypnotized by them because I think this is the exact same experience that everyone in history has had.
[303] Since the beginning of time, we've been building fires.
[304] There's something communal and calming about them.
[305] The fireside chat.
[306] Exactly.
[307] It's a lovely tradition.
[308] And I think a smokeless fire pit from Stolo Stove makes your outdoor moments even more memorable.
[309] Let me explain.
[310] A lot of people get intimidated about making a fire.
[311] you shouldn't.
[312] With solo stove, instead of having to constantly dodge campfire fumes, you know what?
[313] You build a fire and suddenly the fumes, the smoke are going right into your face.
[314] And you're screaming obscenities and your kids are crying.
[315] That's no good.
[316] I don't know if that happens to everybody.
[317] It doesn't.
[318] I've looked around.
[319] I'm the only one.
[320] But with solo stove, you can sit back, relax, and actually enjoy the fire because everything's under control.
[321] It has stainless...
[322] Constroll.
[323] Yeah.
[324] Well, constroll is a word I just made up intentionally.
[325] I've heard it both ways.
[326] Yeah.
[327] No. What I meant was, and this is the reason I invented that word on the fly, which is pretty ingenious, is that you can, things are so under control, you feel like you could take a stroll.
[328] You can control?
[329] You know, I'm going to give you this one.
[330] Yeah.
[331] I'm going to give you that one.
[332] That's, that's rocks on.
[333] Let me explain something.
[334] With a solo stove, they have a stainless steel construction.
[335] It's designed to regulate airflow and burn more efficiently.
[336] With so little smoke, you'll wonder, how there's so much fire.
[337] You know, you'll say, is there really?
[338] There's all this fire.
[339] Where's the smoke?
[340] It's the design people.
[341] It's the perfect catalyst for getting outside and spending more time with family.
[342] And, well, not in this case, but friends.
[343] Oh.
[344] They're easy to light with a few bits of starter.
[345] Your fire is blazing in minutes.
[346] Plus, solo stove offers a lifetime warranty and a 30 -day free return policy.
[347] Can I just say that I was a solo stove owner and user before this ad campaign even happened?
[348] Wow.
[349] I love them.
[350] Is this an ad campaign?
[351] I was like...
[352] Oh, so is I. I thought you were doing an ad campaign.
[353] No, no. Oh, no, we're just gathered here tonight to talk about solo stoves as enthusiasts.
[354] Let's all solo it up.
[355] It just came up.
[356] What I'm saying is you had one beforehand, and I remember you telling me about it, and then I saw someone.
[357] People sometimes build a fire on the beach, you know, up the coast, and I saw one, and I said, what is that?
[358] That looks really cool.
[359] Then, of course, we started working with the good people at Solo Stove.
[360] They supplied us with one, and we've been using it for our summer smores series, and it's fantastic.
[361] Yeah, because you saw it on the beach, because they actually have little carrying cases that you can take with you.
[362] It's portable if you get the right size.
[363] These things are amazing, and they create little, like, cyclones of fire with very little smoke, and you can put in their color packs and get a little fireworks show.
[364] And also, think about the cleanup.
[365] Think about a fire pit.
[366] You have to dig a pit.
[367] That's like digging your own grave.
[368] Right.
[369] At gunpoint, I don't want to do that.
[370] There is no better way to burn an effigy of your boss Conan O 'Brien than a solo stove.
[371] Right on.
[372] And so we did this.
[373] We unboxed it today.
[374] It was really fun.
[375] We set it up.
[376] I thought this is going to be difficult.
[377] No, it was the easiest thing in the world to get this going.
[378] So what do you got to say about this?
[379] I just think, you guys, whatever you're saying is a lot of good stuff.
[380] But aren't you enjoying the solo stove experience?
[381] I'm so close.
[382] I don't think I've ever been this close to a fire.
[383] And I just made a smore on it.
[384] And I have smore everywhere.
[385] But I never got that close to a fire before.
[386] Well, I think a real fire that's unregulated would be dangerous for you.
[387] You've got so much.
[388] product in your hair.
[389] All right.
[390] No, but seriously.
[391] Moving on.
[392] You should go up like a Zeppelin.
[393] You know?
[394] But Solo Stove, very safe, easy to clean up.
[395] Right now, you can get big discounts on all Solo Stove Firepits.
[396] Use promo code Conan at Solostove .com for an extra $10 off their already great prices.
[397] That's Solostove .com promo code Conan for an extra $10 off.
[398] Sona, where exactly are you again?
[399] Tell people.
[400] What?
[401] Which part of Los Angeles is this?
[402] Address, please.
[403] No, no. But it's Altadena, but tell people where that is.
[404] It's north of Pasadena.
[405] Because when I drove there, it's kind of in the mountains.
[406] It is.
[407] It's, I can't get home insurance.
[408] What?
[409] Because it's...
[410] Do you still not have home insurance?
[411] I have home insurance, but I paid a fortune for it because I'm in a fire zone.
[412] Right.
[413] Right.
[414] That's a serious problem.
[415] Sorry, I know.
[416] I brought down the mood.
[417] No, no, you want to go back to hobos and beans?
[418] No, no, no. It's not, this is, it's good for people to hear little pieces of reality, and that's a reality, which is it's hard for you to get fire insurance.
[419] Yeah.
[420] Also, it doesn't help that your home is made of old matchsticks.
[421] And you're in arson.
[422] Yeah.
[423] You know what?
[424] They told us like a couple years ago that we were on the brink of evacuation.
[425] So I took this ice bucket that my grandma had.
[426] And I was like, this is a one of a kind bucket.
[427] No one will ever have this ice bucket.
[428] And I saw it two days ago.
[429] Like in someone's kitchen.
[430] My grandma's ice bucket that I thought was special.
[431] Can I just back up?
[432] What's an ice bucket?
[433] Is this 1902?
[434] What are you doing?
[435] It's an old ice bucket.
[436] What are you in an ice bucket?
[437] My grandma on my dad's side.
[438] I didn't have a lot of stuff.
[439] And so I got her ice bucket.
[440] And she didn't have a lot of stuff.
[441] I remember when I was a kid, you could go and take a tour of John F. Kennedy's birthplace, which is on, I think, Beale Street and Brookline, that town I grew up in.
[442] That was a big thing to do if you're an Irish Catholic kid in Brookline.
[443] Wow, we're going to go over and we're going to tour JFK's birthplace.
[444] Same with Woody or in Nixon.
[445] Yeah.
[446] Yeah.
[447] And so they take you from room to room.
[448] When you get to each room, you push a button.
[449] And you hear Rose Kennedy, J .FK's mother, she made, you know, sometime in the late 60s, she made a tape of each room.
[450] And it was her distinctive voice.
[451] And she would say, in this room, the ambassador would read the newspaper, and the boys would play with their toys.
[452] And then you get to the back, and I remember there was this kooky, crazy ice box.
[453] I didn't know what it was.
[454] And she would say, here's the ice box.
[455] And the ice man would come every day.
[456] And he'd say, that boy there will be president one.
[457] day he'll narrowly defeat Nixon wait who so specific yeah nixon's had a nice box too yeah exactly yeah they all have a nice box and he will narrowly and then he will be president and he will have you know and it was just like you listen to this and go like this is so crazy and i remember thinking as a child i want this in my house oh someday i want people to go from room to room in the house that i'm living in in brookline and i want them to push a button but i also want it to be rose kennedy Here's where Conan thought about his talk show.
[458] I've never seen it, but I hear it's dreadful.
[459] I hear his humor is often quite crass.
[460] And the ambassador would come in and say, I don't like this Conan.
[461] You know, anyway, but I had that same thought.
[462] That's taking you back for a little bit.
[463] But my point is, we're going to be going to Gorley's house.
[464] Yeah.
[465] I'm going to get us back around.
[466] Wait, you're getting, would it back around, like back on track?
[467] Yeah.
[468] Oh, okay.
[469] Yeah.
[470] That's cool.
[471] We'll probably get right back off track, like right away.
[472] We don't really have a track.
[473] What is the track?
[474] I know.
[475] What is the track?
[476] We're just describing that you live in Altadena.
[477] Yeah, I know.
[478] Which and I drove there, and I have to say...
[479] It's lovely.
[480] Yeah.
[481] What were you going to say?
[482] It's a while to get there.
[483] It's way out there.
[484] It is.
[485] But you have a very nice home.
[486] Thank you.
[487] Uninsurable, but nice.
[488] He was uninsurable.
[489] But thanks for bringing that up in like a jokey way.
[490] This is why we're not doing the open campfire at Sonas place.
[491] I know.
[492] There was no question.
[493] Yeah, that's all they want in Eltona is.
[494] A couple of...
[495] Well, podcasters are moving into the neighborhood and they're building fires at night.
[496] Conan O 'Brien responsible for the destruction of six square miles of Angeles National Forest.
[497] Yeah.
[498] Six square miles and three homes.
[499] Sorry, it's very sparsely low.
[500] It's sparsely populated.
[501] That's what's so nice about it, though.
[502] It is lovely.
[503] It's lovely.
[504] Yeah.
[505] Hey, guys, I'm a hesitant to point this out, but we're having a grand old time like just a bunch of chill chums.
[506] Hey, well, you and I are the chill chum.
[507] That's how this whole thing started.
[508] Yeah, Conan ever became a chill chum because he's not chill.
[509] Yeah, we were going to try to teach you how to be a chill chum.
[510] It's just not going to happen.
[511] No, it's not.
[512] Maybe over the next five episodes in the nighttime eastern L .A., Pasadena, sunset with the cicadas chirping in the fire, crackling?
[513] No, I don't think so.
[514] I think that what makes this work, if it does work at all, this mixture is you two are just wildly satisfied with yourselves.
[515] And I'm not.
[516] I always think I could improve.
[517] There's more to do on this earth.
[518] We have limited amount of time.
[519] Oh, so you were saying wildly satisfied in a negative way.
[520] Take it how you will.
[521] I was taking it in a very positive way.
[522] So that's what a children would do.
[523] That's right.
[524] Because we're content with who we are.
[525] Yeah, we're secure with ourselves.
[526] We're not like, oh, we, you know, we need to be better.
[527] Nor do we need to phrase things efficiently or effectively.
[528] No, just babble away.
[529] We don't care.
[530] I got your back, chill chum, C .C. Always, always.
[531] Now, the chill chums, this will take the place.
[532] These episodes will take the place for a while, the fan episodes.
[533] Is that correct?
[534] Yeah.
[535] So you won't be hearing the fan episodes, but we will get back to those because my life's blood is talking to people who are excited about Colonel O 'Brien and being trapped in the wilderness of Pasadena with two people who got over me long before they even met me is my idea of hell is my idea of an absolute hell if you were trapped in the wilderness how long do you think you would last I think I would befriend the animals I would make they would I would make them laugh I would have lots of anecdotes about show business.
[536] I would tell them about behind the scenes little secrets of things that went wrong, you know, and celebrities who were difficult.
[537] And the squirrels would be like, wow, that's, really?
[538] Because he seems like such a nice guy.
[539] It seems like a nice guy.
[540] You know, that's the image, but it's not the reality.
[541] I'm curious, we can try this out because we get a lot of squirrels in the backyard.
[542] And at that time, we get a fair amount of rats, too.
[543] So we'll see.
[544] Do you really have rats?
[545] Oh, yeah, yeah.
[546] But these are Pasadena rats.
[547] They're older genteel rats, right?
[548] They're old money rats.
[549] They're old Republican rats.
[550] Every now and then a rat will scurry by and go like, where's Eisenhower?
[551] They live in small craftsman style of rat houses.
[552] Yeah, little rat houses.
[553] Yeah, yeah.
[554] They drive around.
[555] Their cars have very low mileage.
[556] They enter a float in the parade every year.
[557] Yeah, it's amazing.
[558] They're a rat float.
[559] They're not the most woke rats you'll ever meet.
[560] They have a ways to.
[561] go.
[562] Pasadena is very liberal, but it's very stodgy, liberal.
[563] But that's maybe, you like it there.
[564] It seems like a good fit for you.
[565] I love it, but we don't live in grand old Pasadena.
[566] We live in the Oroyo Hills area, like kind of like Sona.
[567] But your house is like an old craftsman style home, isn't it?
[568] It's kind of a fake.
[569] It's from 47.
[570] It's like a fusion.
[571] Yes.
[572] I knew.
[573] I walked in that house and it has all the elements of craftsmen, but like you, I smelled something was off.
[574] I smelled a conservative rat.
[575] What, you think I'm conservative?
[576] No, no, no, no. No. Please, don't, my thinks, thou doth protest, you might.
[577] And let me just talk a little bit more about Nixon.
[578] Yeah, yeah.
[579] You bring up Nixon at the drop of a hat.
[580] You decided to live in Pasadena.
[581] I think you've got good old Republican values.
[582] My family does.
[583] I do come from a very Republican family.
[584] I could tell.
[585] Your mom, Winifred?
[586] Yeah, she's not anymore, though.
[587] Wilford.
[588] Not to get political, but she, she kicked it to the curb.
[589] Oh, Trump pushed it over the edge?
[590] I think Trump either pushed people over the edge, meaning I can't do this anymore.
[591] or I'm not going to be a Republican.
[592] Or it drove people absolutely cuckoo crazy.
[593] Yeah.
[594] It was one of those two.
[595] Let's get out of politics.
[596] That's making me very nervous.
[597] I do, me too.
[598] This isn't chill.
[599] No, you're right.
[600] Yeah, this isn't chill conversation.
[601] How about this?
[602] How about the owl now starts to say, ooh, that wasn't cool.
[603] Ooh, stay off politics.
[604] Ooh.
[605] Your vote doesn't count.
[606] Ooh.
[607] Keep it a political.
[608] Ooh.
[609] Evergreen.
[610] Electoral.
[611] College is a scam.
[612] Your voice can't be heard.
[613] What are these two owls?
[614] Yeah, what is your owl doing?
[615] He's a nihilist.
[616] Mine's a nihilist.
[617] Oh, okay.
[618] Mine was just saying, I don't like this political comedy.
[619] Keep it kind of chill and fun.
[620] And then you brought in a nihilist owl.
[621] Yeah, I mean, we're living in a simulation.
[622] Get Bitcoin.
[623] I just read Sartre.
[624] What's the point?
[625] I love summer.
[626] Yeah.
[627] I'm sorry.
[628] I just really wanted to change.
[629] It's like you burped.
[630] It's like you burped.
[631] You know it's so funny if someone occasionally got gas, but it was getting us back on track.
[632] So her burps were things like, well, I like summer.
[633] Well, back on point, it is June.
[634] June.
[635] Well, we are here in Gorley's yard.
[636] First month of summer.
[637] All right.
[638] Well, listen.
[639] This was the first.
[640] first episode of Conan the Chilchums.
[641] I don't know how this went.
[642] I don't know.
[643] Smurrs with Conan and the Chil.
[644] Oh, wow.
[645] Oh, man. It's nails against a blackboard when you upset his little world so slightly.
[646] It's so great.
[647] I love it.
[648] We're all having fun here, but let's get the title.
[649] Okay, summer smores with corn and the chill chums.
[650] This was the first episode.
[651] I don't know how it went.
[652] Yeah.
[653] And maybe the listeners will tell us.
[654] Maybe they'll say, hey, wait a minute.
[655] Those Conan talking to fans are really good.
[656] what the hell was this?
[657] How do we pull the ripcourt on this?
[658] What happened?
[659] What happened here?
[660] They bibbled, babbled?
[661] Yeah.
[662] They soiled themselves.
[663] It was an audio soiling of the pants for half an hour.
[664] And we may get a huge blowback.
[665] And I am like a cat.
[666] I'm very nimble on my paws.
[667] If I sense that this is going downhill, I'm going to pull the plug on this thing.
[668] And I'll be talking to a fan in Cairo before you can say, Jack Spratt could eat no fat, his wife could eat no lean.
[669] Do you hear me?
[670] Wow, I do.
[671] That was cool.
[672] But can we make small?
[673] at your house.
[674] Did you guys already say it?
[675] We are going to do this.
[676] I wasn't paying attention.
[677] And I got you covered.
[678] It's okay.
[679] We're going to get your hair.
[680] I know someone.
[681] I'll find you someone.
[682] I don't know someone.
[683] You don't know this person.
[684] No, no. I'm telling you, there's got to be more than one person that can deal with your hair.
[685] I don't know.
[686] Now I have just my sight.
[687] What does she have like a cyclotron?
[688] Does she have a special device that, I mean, what does she have?
[689] Is she herself a curly -haired person?
[690] Yes.
[691] Of course.
[692] Because I've seen her Instagram page.
[693] She gets it.
[694] She just knows what to do.
[695] those things.
[696] I faked an Instagram page.
[697] That wasn't my torso.
[698] You don't know how to do that.
[699] I do.
[700] You don't know how to do any.
[701] No. You don't.
[702] No, yeah, you know how to do Instagram, fake an Instagram page.
[703] I love summer.
[704] Yep, this thing's a mess.
[705] Listen, good luck to all.
[706] I'm sorry, can we make smores?
[707] Yes, that's the point.
[708] So what we're going to do is one of the rare things Conan you and I have ever agreed on is that we think s'm overrated.
[709] Yes.
[710] Sona's strong in the camp pro I don't just think they're overrated.
[711] I think it's an actively terrible treat.
[712] Okay, I'm maybe a little bit more centrist on this, but what we're going to do is we're going to make smores on this first episode and we're going to...
[713] The second episode.
[714] Right, first, I meant campfire episode.
[715] Oh, I'm sorry.
[716] This is the stickler.
[717] I love it when the stickler's like, so anyway, next episode on the first episode, Wamp, Whom!
[718] All right, no more joking.
[719] Do get the title right, though, from here on it.
[720] Okay, yeah.
[721] Summer Smoors with the Chum Chills, starring Conan Gourley and Sona lives Farawasian.
[722] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[723] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam Obsessian, and Matt Gourley.
[724] Produced by me, Matt Gourley.
[725] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Solitaireoff, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson at Earwolf.
[726] Music by Jimmy Vivino.
[727] Supervising producer Aaron Blair.
[728] Associate talent producer Jennifer Samples.
[729] Associate producers Sean Doherty and and Lisa Berm, engineered by Will Beckton.
[730] Please rate, review, and subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.