Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard XX
[0] Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad free right now.
[1] Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.
[2] Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts.
[3] Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous.
[4] I'm Dax Randall Shepard.
[5] I'm joined by Monica Lily Padman.
[6] Armchair Anonymous.
[7] Armchair Anonymous.
[8] A word that gives me anxiety every time I try to spell it.
[9] Every time I try to spell Anonymous.
[10] I can't find the gear and the transmission.
[11] I'm like, A, N, what?
[12] I know there's a Y in there.
[13] How many N's and M's are there?
[14] It's a ruffy for me. Okay, maybe a hack is, if you think of it as anon, if you shortened it to anon.
[15] Okay, star of cereal, that's Adnan.
[16] That's Adon.
[17] If you do anon for short, then you know anon doesn't have a Y, right?
[18] So you know that would come after.
[19] Great.
[20] So then first you spell anon.
[21] Yes.
[22] I love this workshop you're giving me. That's going to sound bad.
[23] A -N -O -N.
[24] I put some tissue in my nose to try to make Monica laugh and throw her off her game, as I always try to do because I'm like working with an eight -year -old.
[25] You are.
[26] Brin your child.
[27] I wish I had balls to throw at you.
[28] Oh, my God.
[29] Oh, my God.
[30] Or I should get one of those toy boy in arrows with a little suction cups at the end and just launch them at you while we do this.
[31] this.
[32] Okay.
[33] Okay.
[34] All right.
[35] I'm trying to teach.
[36] This is what you were like as a student.
[37] Probably.
[38] Oh, wow.
[39] Sorry.
[40] He's got a glimpse my poor teachers.
[41] First you spell anon.
[42] Anon.
[43] Yeah, I can do that.
[44] Spell it.
[45] A -N -O -N.
[46] Perfect.
[47] Now you know you got that out of the way.
[48] Now you add the Y. Uh -huh.
[49] Why must?
[50] M -O -U -S.
[51] That's right.
[52] Really?
[53] Anon -E -M -M -A -M -S.
[54] Okay.
[55] And it's like why, like if it's in Spanish, E. Oh, E -N -E.
[56] Anon -E -Mouse.
[57] Okay.
[58] I did agree.
[59] Great job.
[60] We don't need extra.
[61] You need extra stuff.
[62] Extra stuff.
[63] What if this prompt was, tell us about a word, you have a hard time spelling?
[64] And we got all four guests in under like three minutes.
[65] Oh, my God.
[66] This is Meekutes.
[67] Meekutes.
[68] By popular demand, meet cutts.
[69] Meekute.
[70] And they were cute.
[71] They are.
[72] This is really sweet.
[73] They warm this grinch heart of mine.
[74] Yeah.
[75] Three sizes.
[76] I really liked them.
[77] 1 .5.
[78] Oh, wow.
[79] Batiste, he had already forrexed it.
[80] So there was only so far it could go.
[81] Oh, that's good.
[82] Yeah.
[83] So now it's all the way.
[84] It's all the way.
[85] And you can listen to all these.
[86] The word penis is used.
[87] If that's too much for you, then this isn't for you.
[88] But other than that, this is real safe and sweet.
[89] It's lovely.
[90] Please enjoy Meet Cutes.
[91] All times.
[92] Come and go.
[93] Take them slow.
[94] I had them both.
[95] I remember one thing.
[96] You gotta know, I'm gonna keep from shining.
[97] Hi.
[98] I love how many stuffies you have in your background.
[99] I see four.
[100] Yeah, this is Henry's room.
[101] Henry is my sister's toy poodle.
[102] So this is a little enclave under the staircase.
[103] Hold on, hold on, hold on.
[104] Those are all the dog stuffies?
[105] Yeah.
[106] Wow, he's so spoiled.
[107] Yeah, yeah.
[108] I know.
[109] You should see his closet.
[110] Oh.
[111] He has a closet.
[112] She's a closet.
[113] He has a closet.
[114] I think the dog's her child.
[115] Wow.
[116] Henry.
[117] So Nasi, what a fun name.
[118] How on earth did your parents come up with that?
[119] It's actually Nazi.
[120] It's short for Nausegol.
[121] It's a Persian name.
[122] It means cute flower.
[123] But I think just growing up in L .A. and just having substitute teachers butcher my name constantly, I was kind of scarred.
[124] So when I went to college, I started going by Nausee.
[125] Oh, I like Nauzy.
[126] It's very cute.
[127] Well, cute flower.
[128] Cute, which is the topic today.
[129] That's right.
[130] Ding, ding, ding, ding.
[131] So you have a meat, cute story.
[132] I do.
[133] So this story takes place in transit because I was traveling when it happened, but I was living in Brooklyn and I was going to my friend's wedding in Michigan.
[134] Oh.
[135] I went to college in Michigan.
[136] Yeah, and these were my two best friends from college.
[137] I was really excited to see them get married.
[138] The wedding was in Frankfurt, Michigan.
[139] So as you know, it's like all the way on the west edge.
[140] You have to fly into Grand Rapids.
[141] And then it's like a two and a half to three hour drive.
[142] I'm not that easy to get to.
[143] So I'm on my flight from LaGuardia to Grand Rapids and there's this older gentleman sitting next to me in his like 60s.
[144] This is not the subject of the mute cute.
[145] Oh, I'm already sad.
[146] I couldn't wait to hear about you and the 60 year old.
[147] Yeah, sorry about that.
[148] We start having normal plain small talk.
[149] He's telling me about how he's from Long Island.
[150] He's recently divorced.
[151] He starts talking about his dating life and his sex life.
[152] And I was into younger women.
[153] And it gets really uncomfortable, really quick.
[154] and I'm trying to sort of divert the situation and sort of ignore him and he just keeps trying.
[155] It wasn't great.
[156] Come to find out that he is also going to Frankfurt, Michigan, except he's going to a funeral.
[157] Oh.
[158] And he's staying at the same hotel that I'm staying at.
[159] Oh, no. This is impossible.
[160] The story gets more impossible.
[161] Oh, great.
[162] So I'm like, cool, I'll just try to avoid this person all weekend.
[163] It's fine.
[164] I, like, hop in my rental car, pick up my friend.
[165] We drive to the wedding, have an incredible time from Sunday morning.
[166] I'm ruthlessly hung over.
[167] Exiting out of my room and I see a creepy dude standing outside my door, like leaning on the railing.
[168] I know.
[169] It was really gross.
[170] He smelled like alcohol.
[171] He's smoking a cigarette.
[172] I can't tell if he's like loaded from the morning or the night before.
[173] But I'm just like, how did he know where my room was?
[174] And so he's just like, oh, Nazi, I just wanted to see how the wedding was.
[175] You left your suitcase outside your room on Friday night.
[176] I wanted to to knock on your door and let you know, but I thought you might be sleeping.
[177] And then I'm freaked out because I'm just like, ew, he's known where I've slept this whole time.
[178] Granted, I went to this wedding alone.
[179] So I was like sleeping in the room alone.
[180] So the whole thing just made me even more uncomfortable.
[181] And so I quickly dodge him.
[182] I get in my rental car and with my friend, go to the airport.
[183] This becomes important to the story later, but I was in active alcoholism in addiction at the time.
[184] So I was just drinking a lot before the flight on some other substance.
[185] is and that was the way of coping with the anxiety.
[186] I like you like 10 times more now.
[187] I just want you to know.
[188] Now that the details out, I immediately like you 10 times more.
[189] I figure.
[190] What pills are we mixing in with the booze?
[191] I just need to kind of know what your vibe is.
[192] Yeah, amphetamine.
[193] Okay, great.
[194] And so I get to the gate and I'm waiting and then I see the creepy dude is sitting at the bar.
[195] I'm like, crap, he's also going to be on my flight back.
[196] What in the world?
[197] So I'm kind of just tucked away in the corner and then like in my periphery I see a tall, not six four tall, but tall regardless gentlemen with really pretty green eyes.
[198] And we're like kind of exchanging glances, but I'm on high alert and not really in the mood to flirt right now.
[199] You have a stalker within view.
[200] Yeah, the wall is up.
[201] And then I look him up and down and I look at his shoes and I just don't like his shoes.
[202] He has these orange running shoes, and he's wearing them with jeans.
[203] And I was 25.
[204] That's how you immediately judge a guy you look at their shoes.
[205] Although orange is fun and playful and bold.
[206] Now it would be cool and in.
[207] He was ahead of his time.
[208] He was ahead of his time.
[209] Exactly.
[210] Yeah.
[211] How long ago was this?
[212] This was in 2017.
[213] I'm boarding the flight.
[214] I get to my row, which is row 17, and somebody sitting in my seat, which was 17A.
[215] So I, like, very kindly tell them like, hey, I'm sorry.
[216] I think you're in my seat.
[217] Show them my ticket.
[218] They're like, oh, sorry.
[219] You know, they walk out.
[220] And then I didn't realize it, but pretty eyes, ugly shoes is behind me. He helped me with my suitcase.
[221] And he's like, oh, had I known you were sitting in 17A, I wouldn't have changed seats to sit next to my buddies.
[222] I was supposed to be in 17D.
[223] Have a great flight.
[224] Now I'm like intrigued.
[225] I'm forgetting about the ugly shoes.
[226] How's his face?
[227] It's really nice.
[228] It's tan.
[229] It's like a little bit angular.
[230] He's got some salt and peppery finishes in his hair.
[231] They're like older, but not like 60s older.
[232] More like late mid -th century.
[233] 30s older.
[234] Oh, nice.
[235] Okay.
[236] Monty's sweet spot.
[237] Yeah, I love that.
[238] Yeah, exactly.
[239] So then I'm on this flight, and we have a layover in Detroit.
[240] Everybody going back to New York has a layover in Detroit.
[241] So I'm just in a day's thinking, manically, okay, like, what do I do?
[242] Where do I go?
[243] Do I save something?
[244] He's sitting kitty corner for me at this point and is still trying to talk to me. The creepy dude, not the cute guy.
[245] The creepy dude.
[246] Oh, the creepy guy is within earshot as well.
[247] Yes.
[248] It's a love triangle now.
[249] Okay.
[250] I hope it's his dad.
[251] No, it's not his dad.
[252] That would be weird now because I'm still dating this guy.
[253] Yes.
[254] I'm just like, okay, let me just go to the most crowded place I can think of.
[255] Obviously, it's the airport bar.
[256] I go there, I slam three IPAs in like 40 minutes.
[257] So at this point, I have a lot of booze in my system.
[258] It's like a combination of liquid courage and like also being overly dramatic.
[259] So then I start forwarding the flight that's going back to New York.
[260] And I see that the creepy dude is like a couple people in front of me. And I'm just like, I don't want to encounter this again.
[261] I also see pretty eyes ugly shoes as a few people behind me. And then I'm thinking of myself, like, do I go ask him if he wants to sit next to me since he was supposed to be sitting next to me on the previous flight?
[262] Is that weird?
[263] Am I going to look too damsily and distressy if I do that?
[264] I'm pretty risk -averse persons and pretty reserved.
[265] So I decided like, no, no, that's crazy.
[266] You're not going to do that.
[267] Also, like, you have a ton of booze in your system.
[268] You don't know what the fuck you're going to say.
[269] So I decide not to you.
[270] And then I swear, I don't know, it was just like a higher power.
[271] moment or my subconscious guiding me in a different direction.
[272] But like my brain just went offline for my feet and I found myself just like marching back towards pretty eyes, ugly shoes.
[273] And he's really confused because he's like, who walks the opposite direction out of the airport tunnel?
[274] Like nobody does that unless it's an emergency.
[275] So I stop in front of him and I'm like, hey, can I ask you a really aggressive question?
[276] He's like, sure.
[277] And I'm like, there's this guy that I'm trying to avoid.
[278] It's a little bit of a stalker situation.
[279] Can you sit next to me?
[280] So he's nowhere near me or just so I feel more protected.
[281] I don't exactly remember how I phrased it.
[282] And then he like kind of giggles and he's like, yeah, sure, what's your name?
[283] We exchange names.
[284] I am Nazi.
[285] Hi, I am Jonathan.
[286] He's like, oh, what were you doing in Grand Rapids?
[287] Because he had seen me at the gate.
[288] And I was like, oh, I was at a wedding in Frankfurt.
[289] What were you doing in Grand Rapids?
[290] And he was just like, huh, I was also at a wedding in Frankfurt.
[291] No. And then I was like, what?
[292] Yeah, my friend Sarah and Andrew were getting married.
[293] And then his face just goes like blank and he's so confused.
[294] And he looks like he's getting punked.
[295] And he was like, my friend Sarah and Andrew got married in Frankfurt this weekend.
[296] Wow.
[297] Oh, my Lord.
[298] We're both at really small weddings.
[299] Like, don't remember seeing each other.
[300] We quickly find out they were just different weddings and the same small town in Michigan on the same weekend.
[301] With the same name.
[302] What?
[303] No. That's a big glitch.
[304] That's a very big glitch.
[305] Wow.
[306] Oh, my God.
[307] We got to report this to the systems errors, people.
[308] Yeah.
[309] You know what it is.
[310] Nazi, it's lazy.
[311] Yeah.
[312] Well, he's busy.
[313] Yeah, I guess.
[314] Well, I have to thank him because I did leave me to the person I'm still with.
[315] Well, yeah, because now you guys have a mystery in your laps.
[316] You're like, wait, we were at the same wedding, but we didn't see each other and it was small.
[317] How is this possible?
[318] I mean, it must take you a long time and realize it's two different people with the exact same name.
[319] It didn't take that long.
[320] It took a few minutes.
[321] Okay, all right, well.
[322] But then it got even weirder because we were both from New York.
[323] But, like, not only were we both from New York.
[324] We lived in the same neighborhood.
[325] We went to the same gym.
[326] His apartment was a few blocks from my office.
[327] So, like, there's so many other ways we could have ran into each other other than an airport in Grand Rapids.
[328] So we exchange information.
[329] I find out that his friend lives on my block.
[330] So I decided to share an Uber with them.
[331] So then we get out and we are waiting for his friends to come out of the plane.
[332] And then they deplane and then they see us.
[333] And they're so confused.
[334] They're like, I don't understand.
[335] Our buddy is now standing with his airport crush.
[336] How did this happen?
[337] And now dating this woman.
[338] So it started like that and we slowly started dating and barks were flying and we've been together ever since.
[339] That was six and a half years ago.
[340] And he's amazing.
[341] We've been through so much together.
[342] I got sober while I was with him and our relationship only continued to flourish.
[343] How long ago was that?
[344] I got sober in 2019 of July.
[345] So it's been like four and a half years.
[346] Oh, wow.
[347] Okay.
[348] So within your first year of sobriety, you were doing COVID.
[349] in quarantine.
[350] Yeah, it was not good.
[351] Yeah.
[352] That's hard.
[353] That's tricky.
[354] It was really hard.
[355] Well, congrats.
[356] That's incredible.
[357] Thank you.
[358] Yeah.
[359] And I wanted to thank you guys so much.
[360] I know a lot of people have like a really deep connection to this podcast.
[361] And I obviously do for that reason.
[362] And also in sobriety, I discovered a lot about my mental health that I didn't know before.
[363] Like I have pretty prominent obsessive compulsive disorder, which I didn't realize.
[364] And your podcast is the things that I listen to when I'm having an episode.
[365] And I need to feel like.
[366] Grounded in reality again, I just hear your voices and hear you guys talk to whatever expert that you're talking to and immediately feel like, okay, I know where my places in this world, I don't need to get lost in my own mind.
[367] Oh, my God, it's so flattering.
[368] It's crazy.
[369] I'm so happy for you.
[370] What shoes is he wearing now?
[371] Oh, yeah.
[372] Because obviously, they'll be super cool in three years and maybe I can be ahead.
[373] Right now, he's wearing high top, bluish gray vans.
[374] That sounds cute.
[375] Okay.
[376] Yeah, they're cute.
[377] I'm not very far off from that.
[378] I have now been really gone back to my leather converse.
[379] Okay.
[380] With my Beckham style.
[381] So that's the similar silhouette.
[382] I mean, I'm in my workout shoes right now.
[383] Don't judge me now.
[384] Please don't judge me. He was probably in his workout shoes too that day.
[385] At the airport.
[386] But in jeans?
[387] He forgot or maybe, you know, often this happens where you have to wear the wrong shoe on the plane because it's the bulkiest shoe.
[388] Oh, right.
[389] It won't fit in your bag.
[390] Yep.
[391] That's true.
[392] I've done that.
[393] Oh, yeah.
[394] That makes sense.
[395] Maybe that's what it was.
[396] Tiny silhouette, like a slip on that went into the bag.
[397] Yeah.
[398] That would have been cuter with the jeans, but he had to make a sacrifice.
[399] I like this meet cute.
[400] I was against it, but now I really like it.
[401] Oh, you were against it because you wanted to be the stalker, right?
[402] No, no, no. Just remember the heading itself, me cute.
[403] I was apprehensive about it.
[404] Yeah, you're against.
[405] And now I'm admitting that I really like it.
[406] Okay.
[407] Great.
[408] Well, it's super nice meeting you and I'm really delighted to hear the story.
[409] And I'm so, so happy for you that you've found sobriety.
[410] Oh, thank you so much.
[411] All right.
[412] Well, great meeting you.
[413] And congrats to that dog with that incredible environment.
[414] Henry.
[415] Henry.
[416] Good job.
[417] He's an arm cherry, too.
[418] Then he deserves all of those stuffies.
[419] He does.
[420] He does.
[421] Exactly.
[422] All right.
[423] Bye.
[424] Take care.
[425] Maybe I'll have a meet cute during this.
[426] Oh, my God.
[427] Here comes Kate.
[428] That's how you know right away has.
[429] It's Kate.
[430] K -A -Y -T -E.
[431] Or Katie.
[432] Could be Katie.
[433] Kay -T.
[434] K -T.
[435] I was going to put a little spin on things.
[436] We prize individuality in this country.
[437] Hi.
[438] Is it Kate?
[439] I introduced myself Katie, but a lot of people call me Kate, and I'm totally fine with that too.
[440] No, I want to call you Katie, but never seen it spelled this way.
[441] Such an exciting spelling.
[442] Yeah, thank you.
[443] My dad made it up.
[444] He did.
[445] Dad's like to do this kind of shit, right?
[446] They do, yeah.
[447] Where are you at?
[448] Are you in a pink tent?
[449] I am in my daughter's pink tent.
[450] Oh, fun.
[451] And where are you at in the country?
[452] I am in the southwest suburbs of Chicago.
[453] Rob.
[454] How old are you if you don't mind me asking?
[455] No, I don't mind you asking.
[456] I'm 31.
[457] Were you afraid she was a minor?
[458] You look so young.
[459] I do.
[460] Yes, congratulations.
[461] Oh, to have a daughter with a tent.
[462] Exactly.
[463] That was trying to piece together.
[464] I was like, how?
[465] Because you look 18.
[466] She's only 3.
[467] Still.
[468] Still.
[469] But if you were 18, that would mean you had her at 15, which would be an early start.
[470] You could likely have great grandchildren by 50.
[471] Wow.
[472] on that trajectory.
[473] Yeah.
[474] Okay.
[475] You have a meet -cute story and we're dying to hear it.
[476] Okay.
[477] Great.
[478] So, Monica, we're relatively similar in age.
[479] So I hope you know of this game or maybe even played it and then I'll be a little bit less embarrassed.
[480] Okay.
[481] Do you guys remember or have you ever heard of the penis game?
[482] I remember the penis game.
[483] In the early like 2000s, 2010's when you would just like yell.
[484] Oh, yes.
[485] Penis at like increasing volumes in a public space to see who would respond.
[486] I'm so sad I never was somewhere when someone was playing it.
[487] This was a common game.
[488] I would love this.
[489] It also happened in school.
[490] Yes, yes, definitely, which is where mine takes place.
[491] So I was in college up in Wisconsin, and my girlfriends and I thought on a Saturday night that it would be hilarious to play this game out of one of their apartment windows.
[492] And we would just take turns yelling penis, going up to the window, yelling it.
[493] And as you can imagine, most of them.
[494] people were walking by just like ignoring us or being like ha ha ha you know because we're very immature or getting aroused aren't that the boys getting aroused no it's not sexy so for me if i'm walking um walking on the street god that organic chemistry exam's coming up i don't want to penis and i look over and there's a cute girl going penis i'm like oh my god does she want some penis fuck that organic chemistry test okay okay okay i can see how it would be sexy that's just one scenario that could have played out.
[495] Yeah.
[496] Makes sense.
[497] Well, you're not too far off.
[498] Oh, no. Oh, no. I'll cut all of that.
[499] Okay.
[500] So, it was my turn, and I walk over the window.
[501] Mind you, we're like two or three stories up.
[502] You can just see kind of shadows walking by, but all of a sudden, I just see this big group of what looked like a bunch of college bros walking by.
[503] And I just yell penis at the top of my lungs.
[504] Penis!
[505] And without skipping a beat, one of them stops in his tracks, looks up at me and goes, vagina, what's up?
[506] And so then I just start laughing.
[507] I was like totally caught off guard that someone actually thought it was funny.
[508] He's then yelling up to us like, come to this campus bar.
[509] I was 19 at the time, didn't have a fake ID.
[510] Oh.
[511] I know.
[512] I'm just like giggling to myself.
[513] Yeah, I like this girl.
[514] She's yelling penis out the window and she doesn't have a. Beards, you're drinking a little bit?
[515] You have a little beer?
[516] Probably know if I'm being hot.
[517] Stop filling in the gas.
[518] Oh, that's what I'm here to do.
[519] Color commentary.
[520] I was definitely what you would consider a good girl.
[521] So my girlfriend then starts shouting my phone number out to him.
[522] Oh, okay.
[523] She's going to wing man. I get a couple of text messages that night and they're like, we're at this bar, come out.
[524] And I didn't want to be like, I'm not 21.
[525] So I'm just playing it off like, yeah, maybe another time, you know.
[526] So then I save the number in my phone.
[527] phone is vagina and then kind of forgot about it.
[528] You know, we just moved on with our lives.
[529] Months go by and I get a text message from vagina.
[530] And it was like, hey, we're going to these bars tonight come out.
[531] I was still not 21, not in presence of a fake ID.
[532] We didn't obviously meet up.
[533] But then I just was like, okay, we can just text.
[534] Now really quick, were you afraid to say, I can't go to the bar?
[535] I'm 19.
[536] Were you trying to keep your age a secret?
[537] or you felt it was embarrassing?
[538] I was just kind of a little embarrassed.
[539] Like most people, I feel like, had a fake idea.
[540] Had their shit together for college.
[541] And so I just thought, well, if I tell them this, then what if they think I'm lame?
[542] But then as we started texting that, I told him, because I asked me to go to the bars, I can't go to the bars.
[543] Yeah, yeah.
[544] A few days go by him, we were kind of texting on and off, and he was super nice.
[545] And so I was like, huh, I wonder.
[546] Then I'm talking to my girlfriend, Emily.
[547] I'm like, I really don't know much about him.
[548] all I know is his name is Tom and he's studying biology.
[549] I don't know if I am comfortable meeting up with him because I don't know him or anything about him other than that really.
[550] And her coworker and friend who was sitting right next to her Tim goes, wait, his name's Tom and he's studying biology.
[551] Can I see his number?
[552] So I hand him my phone and he goes, Katie, this is my really good friend and roommate next year.
[553] He's a good guy.
[554] You can go out with him.
[555] Whoa.
[556] And I was like, oh, okay.
[557] Well, that makes me feel more comfortable.
[558] Then we set up a date, and we've been together ever since.
[559] And you have a little three -year -old baby together?
[560] Yeah, so we've been together for 11 years, married for six.
[561] Oh, my gosh.
[562] Was Tom your first boyfriend?
[563] Kind of.
[564] Like serious.
[565] The only one I count, really.
[566] Uh -huh.
[567] Oh, this is terribly sweet.
[568] It started so dirty, but it ended up being so sweet.
[569] Very sweet.
[570] Yeah, you guys were screaming genitalia at each other, and then it turned out to be so, gee.
[571] We're both pretty conservative, so it's pretty startling, I think, for some people to hear that came out of both of us.
[572] Yeah.
[573] Did he have a fake idea, or was he two years older than you?
[574] He was two years older.
[575] Oh, okay.
[576] Or is two years older.
[577] Stud.
[578] Wow, you just start by shouting out.
[579] It's what we call putting yourself out there.
[580] Yeah.
[581] You just put yourself out there.
[582] Wow.
[583] Yeah.
[584] So, Monica, these last few dates haven't worked out.
[585] Just another suggestion.
[586] Open your window.
[587] Invite Callie over so she can scream your phone number.
[588] Yeah, I need some.
[589] women people.
[590] Katie, that's a very sweet story.
[591] I'm very happy you guys of this little baby.
[592] This is lovely.
[593] These are the stories that make you feel encouraged.
[594] They're antidotes to couples therapy.
[595] And antidotes to piercing and tattoos.
[596] Yes, that's true.
[597] This is cleansing.
[598] And we do have another baby on the way, too.
[599] Oh, my gosh.
[600] Thank you.
[601] Is it okay if I give one quick shout out to my girlfriend Tara?
[602] Yes, please.
[603] We've both been listening since day one and texts very regularly about episodes.
[604] So just wanted it.
[605] to tell her, I love her.
[606] And it's so fun to listen with her.
[607] And she also went to school with us, too.
[608] She saw the evolution of Tom.
[609] That's right.
[610] That's so fun.
[611] Well, shout out to her.
[612] And can I just say one more thing?
[613] Monica, when you were talking recently about your grandpa unsinked, so my grandfather had Alzheimer's, he was diagnosed at 64.
[614] And so he lived, unfortunately, for a very long time with it.
[615] And it's so hard.
[616] And so I just wanted to say, I'm feeling for you, and I know how difficult it is.
[617] And one thing that came to mind when you were talking about how hard it is for you to like spend time with him and see him when he doesn't remember you.
[618] I totally relate.
[619] It's very challenging.
[620] My grandma who cared for my grandpa for as long as she possibly could and then it wasn't safe anymore and he had to move into a community, but she would still visit him every day.
[621] And people would say to her all the time, why do you go see him?
[622] He doesn't remember you.
[623] And she said the most simple response and I just loved it and it stuck with me forever is she would say, well, he doesn't remember me. but I still remember him.
[624] Oh, that's lovely.
[625] Yeah, that's a really special thing to remember.
[626] Katie, Tom is so lucky.
[627] Oh, thank you.
[628] Yeah.
[629] It's actually a fake name because we're so conservative.
[630] We didn't even want people to know our penis store.
[631] Oh, my God, you guys are so sweet.
[632] That's fine.
[633] Tom, aka fucking whatever, vagina.
[634] Tom, you're going to be this for Tom.
[635] Yeah, it's lovely.
[636] Thank you for that.
[637] That was really sweet and needed.
[638] You're welcome.
[639] Thinking of you guys.
[640] Well, thank you so much for all you do.
[641] This show has got me through a lot of tough times.
[642] I'm a stay -at -home mom now, which wasn't planned, but just life happened during COVID.
[643] And I get kind of bored.
[644] We are going to keep you busy.
[645] Yeah, yeah.
[646] We just keep turning up the heat.
[647] Well, Katie, it's so nice to meet you.
[648] Thanks for telling us that lovely story.
[649] Take care.
[650] Bye.
[651] Bye.
[652] Now you never wave and I always wave.
[653] It's really crazy.
[654] I almost said I love you.
[655] You know when you say, bye, I love you.
[656] I almost said it too.
[657] Yeah.
[658] She was so sweet.
[659] I know.
[660] So many people are in relationships.
[661] Yeah.
[662] It's pretty common.
[663] By half the people, probably.
[664] It's really interesting to think about that.
[665] Is that?
[666] It's nice.
[667] People find their people.
[668] It's lovely.
[669] Yeah, they team up.
[670] People team up.
[671] It's crazy.
[672] That's like minimally what we can do.
[673] We're supposed to be with 30 people that we trust.
[674] I am.
[675] This extended family.
[676] But I mean, I just mean, like normally you would live with multiple generations of your family.
[677] Yeah.
[678] I was thinking, or were we just talking?
[679] about that?
[680] Oh yeah, we were.
[681] We were talking about you yesterday in the fact check.
[682] The Padmans.
[683] Your fear of them.
[684] The chocolate chip.
[685] How tiny your trusted group was.
[686] Let's talk to Philip.
[687] Oh, chocolate chip.
[688] Penis.
[689] That was a fun game.
[690] We've all been there.
[691] Turning to the internet to self -diagnose our inexplicable pains, debilitating body aches, sudden fevers, and strange rashes.
[692] Though our minds tend to spiral to worst -case scenarios, it's usually nothing, but for an unlucky few, these unsuspecting symptoms can start the clock ticking on a terrifying medical mystery.
[693] Like the unexplainable death of a retired firefighter, whose body was found at home by his son, except it looked like he had been cremated, or the time when an entire town started jumping from buildings and seeing tigers on their ceilings.
[694] Hey listeners, it's Mr. Ballin here, and I'm here to tell you about my podcast.
[695] It's called Mr. Ballin's Medical Mysteries.
[696] Each terrifying true story will be sure to keep you up at night.
[697] Follow Mr. Ballin's medical mysteries wherever you get your podcasts.
[698] Prime members can listen early and add free on Amazon music.
[699] What's up guys?
[700] This is your girl Kiki and my podcast is back with a new season and let me tell you it's too good and I'm diving into the brains of entertainment's best and brightest.
[701] Every episode I bring on a friend and have a real conversation and I don't mean just friends.
[702] I mean the likes of Amy Polar, Kell Mitchell, Vivica Fox, the list goes on.
[703] So follow, Oh, watch and listen to Baby.
[704] This is Kiki Palmer on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast.
[705] Oh, Phillips being assisted.
[706] That's my assistant.
[707] She doubles as my daughter.
[708] I can't wait so mine's old enough to be my assistant.
[709] Yeah, it's really cool.
[710] And then when they're old enough, they definitely make sure you're politically correct.
[711] I have to say, I really appreciate it.
[712] How else would you learn?
[713] I encourage them to get me hip.
[714] I love that.
[715] Right.
[716] Are you a musician, Philip?
[717] Yes.
[718] I'm a composer.
[719] Wow.
[720] I'm Emmy nominated, but as my son likes to say, I'm an Emmy loser.
[721] Oh, that's nice of him.
[722] Yeah, that's another service they can provide.
[723] Congratulations, Emmy nominated.
[724] Thanks, that's nice of you.
[725] You both look beautiful.
[726] Right back at you.
[727] You're very handsome.
[728] Okay, you have a meet, cute story.
[729] I do.
[730] So as you've noticed, I'm a composer, and I went to Berkeley College of music in Boston.
[731] Everybody gets that mixed up.
[732] Yeah, explain that.
[733] Why did they name it Berkeley?
[734] The guy's name was Lee Burke.
[735] So it's spelled B -E -R -K -L -E -E.
[736] Okay, so basically it's the person's name, but as if they were on a roll call.
[737] It actually causes more confusion than anything else.
[738] Because everybody thinks it's Berkeley, Northern California.
[739] Right.
[740] By the way, if you're going to get confused for a school, not a bad one.
[741] No. Like, if you went to Stanford Vocational School for Diesel Mechanics, If it does me any good, I'll just let them think it's Northern California.
[742] So I went there for four years, got a degree in music composition.
[743] What year was this?
[744] Let's just say it was a while ago.
[745] I never thought this was kind of an ageist business, but you're feeling that.
[746] A little bit, it can be because I also produce singer -songwriters.
[747] And until they hear that I can lay down a groove, they look at me with suspicion.
[748] Like, how hip can this guy be?
[749] I understand.
[750] It's a heat -seeking business work.
[751] all in.
[752] Yeah, that's a good way to put it.
[753] We all want the next hottest, best thing.
[754] Exactly.
[755] So I went there and then stayed another three years just touring in bands, saving money.
[756] I'm from Ohio.
[757] So I leave Boston.
[758] I saw a car in a cornfield in Ohio.
[759] You know, that's how they sell cars in the Midwest.
[760] Oh, yeah.
[761] I've bought several from fields.
[762] It was a Mustang hatchback in 1974.
[763] Oh, wow.
[764] $2 ,500.
[765] Beautiful.
[766] I just put everything in that.
[767] moved to L .A. Fortunately, the neighbor next to me where we shared a wall, which that'll be another episode, we can share some of those stories.
[768] But she worked for a music publishing company.
[769] The way music publishing companies work is they'll have staff writers that write songs, and they'll pitch those songs to recording artists that are selling millions of records.
[770] And then they'll make money.
[771] They own half of the then recording.
[772] You got it.
[773] I got this gig.
[774] My neighbor found out I could listen to music and write it out.
[775] I could transcribe it.
[776] So remember cassette tapes?
[777] Yeah.
[778] She would bring these cassette tapes home.
[779] I would transcribe a song, stay up all night, handed the music in for her to take to work in the morning.
[780] And they liked the quick turnaround.
[781] And so I paid my rent for years that way.
[782] That's a neat side hustle.
[783] It was great.
[784] So when you're transcribing something, you're kind of weeding it back and forth.
[785] Wait, is that?
[786] that a B flat?
[787] No, that's a B natural.
[788] So by the time you've transcribed something, you're so inside of it.
[789] You almost feel like you've written it.
[790] Of course.
[791] Yeah, that makes sense.
[792] I would listen to these singers writing the melody down.
[793] And there was one singer in particular that was just like, wow.
[794] It was MCA publishing.
[795] They had several studio singers.
[796] But every time this singer would sing something, I would kind of forget that I have to transcribe this and just start listening to it.
[797] And then I say, wow, it's three in the morning, man. I have to get this done.
[798] You were mesmerized by this singer.
[799] Completely mesmerized.
[800] I started feeling like she was singing to me. Sure, sure, sure.
[801] And have you created a mental picture of what she looks like at this point?
[802] Yeah.
[803] This is before Facebook or social media, anything like that.
[804] Now, here's the part, I guess I'm not that proud of, but you're both so open.
[805] Yeah, you can say anything.
[806] I know.
[807] I feel safe.
[808] Good.
[809] I was living with a girlfriend.
[810] Different woman.
[811] Yes, yes, sure.
[812] Sure, sure, sure.
[813] This happens.
[814] Love isn't always tidy.
[815] No, that's right.
[816] Rarely tidy.
[817] That's right.
[818] It doesn't work out that way.
[819] It's a messy business.
[820] And by the way, we're still friends.
[821] Okay, yeah.
[822] I'll just use everybody's name.
[823] So I would say to Mary, God, I love this singer.
[824] Yes.
[825] And she would say, yes, me too.
[826] Oh, wow.
[827] Okay, yeah.
[828] That went on for quite a while, like over a year.
[829] Wow.
[830] But it started becoming like, it didn't matter to me if she had an eye in the center of her forehead.
[831] I'm not kidding.
[832] I didn't care.
[833] It was just like, I want to have little baby cyclopsis with you.
[834] Yes, sure, sure.
[835] I would say, yeah, I love her.
[836] And Mary would say, yes, me too.
[837] But in my mind, I'm thinking, I think it's starting to take on a little different meaning.
[838] Wow, yeah, yeah.
[839] This is kind of like the movie, her.
[840] Oh, yes.
[841] Where he's falling in love with the AI voice.
[842] That's a good point.
[843] And he's falling deeply in love.
[844] My daughter told me, not to use the word stalker, but I was like, well, let's back up.
[845] Again, you're not going to give the year of your graduation, but you bought a 74 Mustang.
[846] You're using tapes.
[847] We know the era.
[848] And look, I'm not that far off of that.
[849] And things were fucking different because you couldn't reach out to somebody with a text.
[850] You couldn't get their number and send them a flirty text.
[851] You had to arrive somewhere and take your shot.
[852] Or DM, none of that.
[853] You had to show up in.
[854] Like, it's inherently was stalker because you had to show up uninvited to make.
[855] make the introduction.
[856] There was no soft way to do it.
[857] Correct.
[858] And my neighbor, Debbie, she kind of knew because I was constantly asking questions about this singer whose name is Karen Blake and tell me about her.
[859] Debbie kind of knew like, okay, I could feel you've got a little crush happening here.
[860] And so I knew that Debbie was inviting Karen over one Saturday.
[861] Oh, boy.
[862] So I just kind of left my door open to my apartment.
[863] Debbie has her door open.
[864] and I hear these footsteps coming up the stairs.
[865] And so I could hear Debbie greeting Karen.
[866] So what I did was I took the last thing I had transcribed of Karen's, and I put it on my stereo and, like, cranked it to 11.
[867] Okay.
[868] And just blasted it for like 10 full seconds and turned it off, and I could kind of hear them laughing.
[869] So I went over there, and she was and still is incredibly beautiful.
[870] exceeded your mental picture you had created?
[871] Oh, wow.
[872] Well, he had a cyclops.
[873] Well, that's true.
[874] Expectations were allowed.
[875] Totally hot.
[876] I just thought, I just had to be myself.
[877] And now I have to kind of tell it slightly from my wife's perspective.
[878] And she said, from Karen's perspective.
[879] And she said, it was love at first sight.
[880] Oh, wow.
[881] Had she been briefed on you at all?
[882] I think she knew that this guy had a little crush on her.
[883] Yeah, okay.
[884] But guess what?
[885] She had a boyfriend, too.
[886] Oh, boy.
[887] This is so often how it is.
[888] She said it was love at first sight for her.
[889] For me, it was, I don't know what you'd call it, love at first listen.
[890] Yeah.
[891] Then MCA, they hired me to kind of produce some showcases and produce some things for her.
[892] And, you know, a lot of time together.
[893] Yes, you can figure out how old I am because we've been married 40 years.
[894] years.
[895] We have two great adult kids.
[896] They inherited their mom's singing ability.
[897] Oh, that's the hope over here as well.
[898] My son is such a prolific songwriter.
[899] It's like, you motherfucker.
[900] I had to work so hard.
[901] He just has it so quickly.
[902] We do have fun when we make music together.
[903] And we do this little thing where we all jam in our cozy little kitchen and we'll just put up an iPhone.
[904] We post them.
[905] I know it's not that big of a deal nowadays, but one of them got 1 .5 million views.
[906] That's enormous.
[907] For civilians?
[908] Yeah.
[909] For a civilian, right.
[910] I so feel like I married up, and I'm really lucky.
[911] I can feel it fell off.
[912] Yeah, it's really lovely.
[913] I can feel your love to Dax for your wife.
[914] It's very similar.
[915] Like, we're so lucky, man. Well, when you admire someone, it's really helpful.
[916] I swear, and she does sing for me a lot.
[917] Do you cry?
[918] I cry.
[919] Well, I get Misty on sometimes.
[920] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[921] And it's just like, I can't believe I get to go to bed with you tonight.
[922] Yeah.
[923] How lucky am I, man. I think everyone won.
[924] The kids won.
[925] Karen won.
[926] Philip one.
[927] Yeah, and by the way, our two other significant others, they're completely happy in their lives.
[928] I wish they would have got together and then there are next call.
[929] Like Chenaya Twain.
[930] She got together with the husband.
[931] of the woman her husband cheated with.
[932] Right.
[933] Very interesting.
[934] Swapped.
[935] That's very civil.
[936] It is.
[937] It's clean.
[938] Let's just doce dough and keep it moving.
[939] Well, Philip, it's really nice meeting you.
[940] That's such a sweet story.
[941] You guys are beautiful.
[942] And your stock value in our house is really high.
[943] Oh, this is good.
[944] Your house seems like a really good safe port and a storm.
[945] I agree.
[946] Yeah, it's safe here.
[947] Yeah, it looks like it.
[948] Oh, here comes your.
[949] Oh, there she is.
[950] Oh, the woman of the hour.
[951] Oh, my God.
[952] Your daughter is technologically advanced because she's got two sets of headphones working off of this.
[953] I'm not a complete idiot.
[954] I did that.
[955] Will I get in here.
[956] Emmett.
[957] Come around.
[958] Oh, my gosh.
[959] And we're going to get Emmett, too.
[960] What a beautiful family.
[961] Oh, my God.
[962] Look at these gorgeous children.
[963] We thought it might be a meat cute.
[964] Monica.
[965] Let's snatch up this young lad right here.
[966] He's talented.
[967] Oh, I know it.
[968] He's available.
[969] Oh, my God.
[970] How old are you?
[971] How old are you?
[972] Monica, are you a vocalist, too?
[973] No, God, no. But she is a good singer.
[974] She just doesn't do it out.
[975] Like, he's out.
[976] This is good.
[977] He's a louvre.
[978] I like when they leave.
[979] It makes me want more.
[980] Sorry, they left.
[981] He loved because he didn't know we were talking about you dating him.
[982] He didn't have headphones.
[983] How old is he?
[984] He's 24.
[985] Oh, that's a little bit rough.
[986] That's a pretty big age.
[987] Somebody will be very very big.
[988] Yeah, someone's going to be lucky as hell.
[989] Yeah.
[990] But it won't be this old, Gail.
[991] Okay.
[992] He's six, seven.
[993] He's gorgeous.
[994] Oh, this is painful.
[995] This hurts.
[996] Look, you can have a fling, a Christmas fling.
[997] No, he doesn't deserve that.
[998] Oh, he does.
[999] He likes flings.
[1000] No, no, he's open to it.
[1001] All right.
[1002] Get back in here.
[1003] He's such a dad.
[1004] Invite his son.
[1005] No, he's down for this.
[1006] Wow, you're so handsome.
[1007] Yeah.
[1008] Oh, my God.
[1009] Six.
[1010] Mom, give them the headphones for one second so he knows what we're saying.
[1011] Oh, man. I feel...
[1012] Six, seven.
[1013] Six, seven.
[1014] Oh, my God.
[1015] And you sing?
[1016] With the voice of gold.
[1017] I pretend to.
[1018] No, no. Yeah.
[1019] I would love to share something with you.
[1020] It's really...
[1021] And that's the thing.
[1022] He's just sitting on a mountain of stuff.
[1023] He's kind of figuring out what he wants to do and he's not releasing it.
[1024] If I were him, I would look in a fucking mirror for the rest of my life.
[1025] He's humble, too?
[1026] I know, but I would just...
[1027] stare at myself in the mirror if I look like this guy.
[1028] Great hair, too.
[1029] What do you think, Monica?
[1030] Come on.
[1031] Let's go for an evening out.
[1032] Maybe there's a number exchange.
[1033] Yes.
[1034] Let's go out on the top.
[1035] MeQ number two.
[1036] Let's do it.
[1037] All right, we'll email everyone.
[1038] This has been so fun, you guys.
[1039] This is so fun.
[1040] Really, really great sharing with you guys.
[1041] Yes, right back at you.
[1042] Great meeting everybody.
[1043] Bye.
[1044] All right.
[1045] Take you.
[1046] Bye.
[1047] Oh, my God.
[1048] He's gorgeous.
[1049] He's so gorgeous.
[1050] It's crazy.
[1051] Six -seven.
[1052] Whoa.
[1053] Oh, your pants are you unbuttoned?
[1054] Yeah, they're unbuttoned.
[1055] 24.
[1056] Wow, that's okay for just a nice fun weekend.
[1057] 24 is really a lot younger than me. Oh, it's fine.
[1058] At 6 '7, that's like 30.
[1059] Oh, is that how it works?
[1060] Yeah, you do add two years for every inch over 6 '4.
[1061] Wow.
[1062] For a lot of that, if we hadn't seen the daughter, I would have bet money that he was Billy Eilish.
[1063] his dad.
[1064] That would have made sense.
[1065] Because Phineas and Billy.
[1066] Yes.
[1067] I was like, I think this is where this is going.
[1068] Oh, my God.
[1069] That would have been wild if they walk down.
[1070] They live here.
[1071] They live in our house.
[1072] They live in their house.
[1073] We're so far behind.
[1074] Let's get Caroline on the phone.
[1075] We had to work on my meet queue.
[1076] Man, that was six, seven.
[1077] I'm intimidated.
[1078] Hello.
[1079] Hello.
[1080] Hi.
[1081] Is this Caroline?
[1082] This is Caroline.
[1083] How are you guys?
[1084] Good.
[1085] How are you?
[1086] Good.
[1087] Just waiting a nervous.
[1088] anticipation.
[1089] I'm sorry.
[1090] We just had a meat cute that turned into a meat cute for Monica.
[1091] Double meat cute.
[1092] I mean, that's the dream.
[1093] Fingers crossed.
[1094] We're just talking about the ethical age gap, but I'm supportive.
[1095] The boy we just met was 24, but he was 6 '7.
[1096] Big boy.
[1097] Daddy long legs.
[1098] Daddy long legs.
[1099] And he's very hot and a musician.
[1100] So we think that might get him to like 32.
[1101] Green light, green light, green light.
[1102] That's all I'm hearing.
[1103] Okay, so Caroline, you have a meet -cute story.
[1104] What state did it take place in?
[1105] I like to know regionally what's happening.
[1106] Charlotte, North Carolina.
[1107] Oh, great.
[1108] Love North Carolina.
[1109] One of my favorite places.
[1110] So this was in 2013 in January.
[1111] I was working at a TV station there.
[1112] I'm a local news reporter.
[1113] An Ice Storm had rolled in.
[1114] I was doing live shots all night about conditions, things that were happening, monitoring everything.
[1115] In the field or in the studio?
[1116] In the field.
[1117] one who's like standing next to the road of slush and a semi goes by and you almost get killed yes foreshadowing oh you're jumping ahead here so it's towards the end of my shift I worked in the evening till like 10 or 11 and a lot of people may not realize even if you're on air a lot of times you do shooting and editing as well so you're kind of doing the camera work oftentimes especially in smaller markets they were like okay we have reports of down power lines at this intersection can you go check it out, get some video, bring that back to us.
[1118] So I'm like, sure, no problem.
[1119] Head out there.
[1120] Really quick, Caroline.
[1121] Part of this seems really, really fun, like almost like you're a police officer.
[1122] Like, we got a report of this.
[1123] Go find it and sniff around.
[1124] Isn't that sound a little fun, Monica?
[1125] You're getting like real -time challenges.
[1126] Yeah.
[1127] I think I would like this.
[1128] Journalists are the one heading towards the disaster when everyone's heading away.
[1129] So I think there's something in us that compels us to do that.
[1130] So I pulled up, of course, the intersection was dark.
[1131] I kind of pulled up in a driveway.
[1132] I'm a little bit farther back.
[1133] I start shooting video.
[1134] It's pretty deserted out.
[1135] It's still raining.
[1136] It's freezing.
[1137] And two cars end up careening through the intersection, not stopping.
[1138] They hit each other.
[1139] And that sends one into me at 35, 40 miles an hour.
[1140] Oh, my God.
[1141] Oh, my goodness.
[1142] So I went flying about 40 feet.
[1143] Oh, you got hit by the car in your body.
[1144] Yes.
[1145] Oh, my God.
[1146] Oh, Bob.
[1147] We're about to lose the computer power wise if you want to run sorry we got the low battery signal i thought you met mine and i was like i double checked everything you are someone who i can see already you triple checked everything are you a virgo no i'm a libra oh congratulations i don't either but congrats i'm gonna look at is that a cat i think it's scales oh you do feel very balanced i'll take that okay so you get plowed into by a car going 35 Holy fuck.
[1148] So luckily, a good Samaritan witness this whole thing.
[1149] She came and found me, got me to the hospital.
[1150] So essentially, I had broken my pelvis in two places, my lower back.
[1151] Oh, fuck.
[1152] My left arm was broken in multiple places, dislocated.
[1153] And I cracked my skull in three places, traumatic brain injury, which was the biggest concern.
[1154] Yes.
[1155] My parents in Texas got the call from the neurosurricular.
[1156] surgeon, like, you need to get here immediately.
[1157] We don't know if she's going to make it through the night.
[1158] Oh, my.
[1159] Could your brain had swelled up.
[1160] Exactly.
[1161] Were you experiencing amnesia?
[1162] Were you on a loop?
[1163] I don't really remember much of that first night at all or really, honestly, the first kind of weeks in the hospital is kind of a blur.
[1164] I remember right after I got hit, lying on the ground, and feeling the rain pelting my face and knowing I couldn't do anything to shield myself and thinking, okay, something's wrong.
[1165] But I don't really remember much after that.
[1166] But for whatever reason, the swelling on my brain went down.
[1167] I survived, and the nurses in the ICU called me the miracle on the floor.
[1168] They said they'd never seen someone get hit that hard and survive.
[1169] Wow.
[1170] So it was a long recovery.
[1171] I was in the hospital for a bit, surgeries, and then transferred to a full -time rehab facility for about six weeks or so.
[1172] And then when I got out and I was discharged, I was still in a wheelchair for a month or so after that, doing physical therapy.
[1173] Of all these injuries, which one would you say was the worst?
[1174] the pelvis?
[1175] Well, the brain injury in the beginning, which is definitely the worst.
[1176] Sensitive to light.
[1177] Couldn't even open my eyes.
[1178] Just like the sheer pain is just hard to even describe.
[1179] And then after that, the toughest recovery, honestly, was the shoulder because I ended up having big plate, lots of screws.
[1180] You know, needless states, this whole process, I had to have help to go to the bathroom to take a shower.
[1181] I was 24.
[1182] Didn't have any independence during that time.
[1183] Same age as my suitor.
[1184] So he's probably very mature.
[1185] I think I handled it.
[1186] Okay.
[1187] Yeah, you're right, yeah.
[1188] So when I finally was walking again, got out of the wheelchair, what does a 24 -year -old want to do?
[1189] I want to go out.
[1190] I wasn't drinking.
[1191] I wasn't that dumb.
[1192] I knew I was still in a delicate condition.
[1193] But you had gotten cabin fever from the injuries.
[1194] It was like, you need to get out.
[1195] Yes.
[1196] So this was my first night out.
[1197] My friends took me to a bar.
[1198] I still have like a really big arm sling from the surgery.
[1199] Hot.
[1200] But that's kind of the only visible sign of anything that had happened.
[1201] So we're having a fun night.
[1202] It's kind of a dive bar.
[1203] There's like a short hallway and there's the men.
[1204] and women's restrooms next to each other.
[1205] So when you're kind of lined up, you're all waiting in line together.
[1206] So this guy across from me in line, of course, is like, looking at my sling.
[1207] He's like, okay, what happened to you?
[1208] And I kind of just start telling the story and we're like inching forward.
[1209] Right before I get in the door, he like stops me. He's like, wait, I got to ask you something.
[1210] I'm like, okay, what's up?
[1211] Are you right -handed or left -handed?
[1212] And I was like, oh, I'm right -handed.
[1213] Why?
[1214] He's like, oh, good.
[1215] I just wanted to make sure you could wipe your own ass.
[1216] Sure, sure, sure.
[1217] I kind of laughed, but I was taking it back.
[1218] And I was like, dude, I got it.
[1219] It's aiming for the fences.
[1220] It's going right out.
[1221] Yeah, I'm good.
[1222] I can handle my own business.
[1223] Thanks for checking.
[1224] And honestly, didn't think that much of it, but my friend in the bathroom had heard the whole thing.
[1225] And when she came out, she was like, who was this guy?
[1226] I got to meet him.
[1227] I can't believe he said that.
[1228] So we chatted.
[1229] He got my number.
[1230] A couple days later took me out to dinner and fell in love pretty quickly after that.
[1231] 2017, we got married and at our wedding, instead of throwing out a bouquet, I had saved that sling because I just had a hunch about that night.
[1232] I threw that out.
[1233] I figured it was much more practical for my single friends, but also kind of a way to acknowledge to our friends and family who had helped me through that process.
[1234] You'll never actually need a garter, but you could need a slant.
[1235] That's right.
[1236] Right?
[1237] It's actually could be a practical.
[1238] Yes, it's useful.
[1239] And as I told people, and my now husband didn't like this.
[1240] part of the story, but I was like, I've never been hit on more in my life than when I was wearing the sling because it's like such an easy in.
[1241] It's like that approachable, you know, question.
[1242] Yes, that's what dogs do and kids do.
[1243] They just give you some.
[1244] It's all about putting yourself out there.
[1245] Yeah.
[1246] It's like you wear like cool boot.
[1247] Like you wear sling.
[1248] You invite some conversation.
[1249] Yeah.
[1250] Yeah.
[1251] So you guys have been together for nine or 10 years now.
[1252] Yeah, it was 10 years that we had met each other this year and we have three little kiddos.
[1253] Oh my gosh.
[1254] And are you still doing reporting?
[1255] I am.
[1256] Oh, wonderful.
[1257] So if we were in Charlotte and we turned on the local news, would we see you?
[1258] No, I'm actually in Dallas now.
[1259] Okay, and if I turned on the TV there, I would see you.
[1260] You would.
[1261] Do you ever run into Gordon Keith?
[1262] I do not.
[1263] Oh, I feel like you guys should.
[1264] You're in the same business.
[1265] Maybe that'll be your next me, cute.
[1266] Well, no, it doesn't have.
[1267] Me cute, yeah, they don't have to end in marriage and children.
[1268] Yeah, could end in friendship.
[1269] With Caroline in a baby carriage?
[1270] Yeah.
[1271] Yeah, but, you know, never would have.
[1272] anticipated that pickup line would work or that the worst thing that had happened to me in some weird roundabout way led to the best.
[1273] Yeah, because it's, you were probably very career driven.
[1274] If you're on the side of a fucking snowy road with your own camera gear, you're on it, right?
[1275] And you might not have slowed down long enough to even be open to this.
[1276] No, and we don't run in the same circles.
[1277] So, I mean, who knows if that night at the sling, the bar, and there's a million ways it could have gone.
[1278] Oh, man, I love it.
[1279] Caroline, that was very sweet and wonderful.
[1280] I mean, starts with a big tragedy, of course.
[1281] But talk about making lemonade out of lemons.
[1282] I know.
[1283] I was like, they're going to think I'm going to meet like some doctor or nurse.
[1284] That is what I thought.
[1285] It takes a turn.
[1286] Firefighter, Kiani, her off from the side of the road.
[1287] Love it.
[1288] Oh, that was wonderful.
[1289] Thanks for sharing that.
[1290] Of course, Monica, I have to tell you, go dogs.
[1291] My husband is from where you're from and he's the biggest Georgia fan.
[1292] Are they undefeated still?
[1293] Yeah.
[1294] They are.
[1295] That's why our third child is my favorite, because since, The day she was born, and she's almost two, they have not lost a single game.
[1296] Yes.
[1297] Wow.
[1298] She's a good luck.
[1299] Yeah, for lots of reasons, but mainly football.
[1300] The most important game.
[1301] Well, wonderful meeting you, Caroline.
[1302] Thanks for telling us that story.
[1303] It's so nice to meet you guys.
[1304] I listen to you all the time.
[1305] It's so awesome to chat with you.
[1306] Thank you.
[1307] Right back at you.
[1308] Have a great day.
[1309] Y 'all too.
[1310] Oh, that was sweet.
[1311] That was sweet.
[1312] Good idea.
[1313] We'll love to do that again.
[1314] That's life affirming It is Love you Love you Do you want to sing a tune Or something I'm going to sing a tune or something I'm going to a theme song Oh Okay great We don't have a thing song for this new show So here I go go We're gonna ask some random questions And with the help of our cherries We'll get some suggestions On the flyer rhymedish On the flyer rhymedish Enjoy Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondry app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts.
[1315] You can listen to every episode of Armchair Expert early and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.
[1316] Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry .com slash survey.