52 - Bonjour, Internet!

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] Hey, this is exciting.

[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.

[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[5] Who killed Saz?

[6] And were they really after Charles?

[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[8] This season, murder hits close to home.

[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[14] Only Martyrs in the Building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[15] Goodbye.

[16] Stephen?

[17] Yes.

[18] Oh, my God.

[19] It feels like Polder Guys Part 4 or something.

[20] It has a Duran Duran quality to it as well.

[21] Yeah.

[22] Steven, look, we're your mothers, and we're really proud of you.

[23] That was great.

[24] Nice.

[25] Now, what setting was that on?

[26] Bossa Nova.

[27] Bossa Nova.

[28] It's amazing what you can do with that.

[29] Yeah, it was, so each time it's been, like, a different, like, drum setting on the Cassio.

[30] The first one was Samba.

[31] I really like that one.

[32] I really thought that was beautiful.

[33] Yeah.

[34] Thank you.

[35] It was like haunting.

[36] Now, was it a conscious choice to pull your own vocals out and just let it be an instrumental?

[37] I just wanted to, I don't know, I just wanted something with some glock and spiel in it.

[38] I wanted to glock around.

[39] Yeah, you got to pull up that Glock every once in a while.

[40] That was gorgeous.

[41] It's really good.

[42] Karen, I, like, do you ever get, like, I wrote that song?

[43] Yeah, I get really pissed.

[44] But then I go through all these other emotions.

[45] Like hungry, lonely, tired, angry.

[46] Shut down, entirely shut down.

[47] Yeah, like, oh, there's a dog over there.

[48] Yeah, distracted.

[49] Distracted is the final stage of grief.

[50] Distracted by dogs is a special.

[51] No, I love this idea that Stephen's reconnoitering the theme song.

[52] Because we're probably all a tiny bit, 52, right?

[53] We've heard a 52 times.

[54] Oh, yeah.

[55] I mean, it's, you know, we need a refresher.

[56] I like the idea.

[57] And it's a fun, like, yeah, reconnoitering.

[58] We have to reconnoiter.

[59] I've never heard that.

[60] Is that Yiddish?

[61] It's, uh, it's my, my Irish grandmother used to say it.

[62] But say Yiddish words.

[63] Yeah, I know it.

[64] She was fluent.

[65] And saying Yiddish words every once in while.

[66] Do you know what's funny?

[67] I actually just thought of this the other day because we were, somebody was telling a story about maids.

[68] My grandmother was a maid.

[69] She came to this country and she was like 17.

[70] And she was a maid.

[71] in San Francisco until she got married basically.

[72] So like...

[73] Amazing.

[74] Amazing.

[75] For like 15 years.

[76] That should have been.

[77] And one of the places that she worked in...

[78] No, it's not going to be scary, but it's just...

[79] She worked for a family that lived in Seacliff, which is like the Urizzis part of San Francisco, as you might know.

[80] It's like nobody knows that it's there.

[81] I don't know what that is.

[82] I live there.

[83] You know what it is?

[84] When you're driving over the Golden Gate Bridge to go to San Francisco, the left -hand side is the marina and fisherman's orphan.

[85] all that stuff.

[86] The right hand side looks like a forest, but that's actually mansions.

[87] I know.

[88] I did not know that.

[89] It's hidden mansions.

[90] And so my grandmother was a maid for a family.

[91] Well, she just called them the Jews.

[92] And she would always say, I think the Jews are nice.

[93] The Jews are real nice.

[94] Oh, I worked for nice Jews.

[95] And then you and I came together.

[96] And you were like, I think the Jews are nice.

[97] I think she cracked the door open in my mind.

[98] I podcast with a nice Jew.

[99] Grandma.

[100] you say i think you'd be proud about that we're still in cahoots with nice jews and they're still nice shoes they're still out there what year was that like the fucking 30s i think yeah yeah we they didn't nobody liked us back then well nobody liked anybody nobody liked the irish no we everyone fucking that was back when there were signs that say don't hire the irish in every store they thought that the two of us were a fucking plague on humanity and you know what they can suck it am i wrong i mean Were they wrong or were they wrong?

[101] I mean, who's on top now with a podcast?

[102] Me and you.

[103] Grandma, check it out.

[104] Grandma, let me show you something.

[105] She'd be like, I don't like all the talking.

[106] You called her vulgar.

[107] Yeah, she would actually be insanely pissed about the Fs.

[108] All those Fs.

[109] Oh, the French is what you're saying.

[110] She doesn't like when I speak French because she doesn't like the French.

[111] Who does.

[112] I don't know.

[113] Okay.

[114] Just pull it.

[115] Stephen, take all that out.

[116] Welcome to my favorite murder.

[117] Oh my God.

[118] What was wrong with us?

[119] That's a bad start in terms of the racist issues.

[120] I don't know my favorite murder.

[121] That Irish person is Karen Kilgara.

[122] And that Jewish person is Georgia.

[123] Yale Hardstark.

[124] That's the fastest Jewish name I could think of.

[125] It's called, it's Georgia, Los Angeles City College.

[126] Dropout Hardstark is actually, would be more accurate.

[127] I didn't go to Yale.

[128] I meant the Jewish name, Yale, Y -A -E -L.

[129] Oh, yeah, like, Yale.

[130] Oh, is that how you pronounce it?

[131] Like the gorgeous chick from Orange is a New Black.

[132] Yeah, who, which one?

[133] That's her name.

[134] The one who's like, when me and so -and -so are going to get buried.

[135] Bora, Bora, Bora.

[136] She is.

[137] Her first name's Yale.

[138] Yeah, L. And she was in an episode of the show called, Stephen, help me out here, deadbeat.

[139] Okay, that's the show.

[140] show called Deadbeat about a dude who's a drug dealer in Manhattan.

[141] And there's a special episode that's like the dog episode.

[142] And it makes no sense.

[143] It's on HBO, I think.

[144] And the people who wrote it were like, this is this episode and sent it to HBO.

[145] And they're like, you can't give us any notes on it.

[146] Like they were hard, which you know is like unheard of.

[147] Like you, they're just like no notes.

[148] And it is one of the most gorgeous, Stephen, can you find out what the name of the episode?

[149] Like, it's one of the most gorgeous episodes of television.

[150] Is this a new TV show called Deadbeat?

[151] It's new.

[152] She has, I think it's first season, but it's kind of a show.

[153] The episode is just in the perspective of this dog.

[154] And Yale is the dog walker, and you're just going to fall in love with her.

[155] Like, she's so...

[156] Anyway, what were we talking about?

[157] This is a murder.

[158] So this is a murder podcast.

[159] That's, yeah, we're in the interview.

[160] But it's good to know.

[161] It's pronounced Ye 'L.

[162] That's what I think.

[163] I think.

[164] I could be, you're wrong about that.

[165] Oh, you're asleep?

[166] I'm asleep.

[167] Let's see.

[168] Should we update anything?

[169] Well, this just happened on Twitter as we were like in between one recording and another.

[170] I looked down at my Twitter and somebody had written, have you heard about the New Hampshire murder, New Hampshire murder castle?

[171] You guys have to talk about it.

[172] So I immediately send back a message saying, what are you talking about in all caps?

[173] because I was like you there's another murder castle like how do I not know about this and then he and then he wrote back yeah H .H. Holmes and I was like that's Chicago you god damn it um but then he started laughing and was like oh my god you're right but apparently H .H. Holmes is from New Hampshire oh he was probably just either flipped it or was at the beginning of the story he was at the beginning of the book about H .H. Holmes or whatever.

[174] That's actually one of the funniest ones that people ask us about like if we know do we know H .H. Holmes and it's like that That one is just like, it's like asking us if you know about Ted Bundy.

[175] Yeah, or like, have you ever eaten a McDonald?

[176] It's like, yeah, yeah, I really do.

[177] Maybe amazing chicken.

[178] They're filet of fish.

[179] Not to be, you know, anything about it except for how do you, the guy built a murder castle.

[180] You got to know if you're even slightly interested in true crime.

[181] If Leonardo DiCaprio is even thought about as a main character in this movie, which he is, like, we've probably heard about it.

[182] I would say.

[183] Who do you think would play Ted Bundy?

[184] um well Greg canier pops to mind oh my god thank you thank you thank you come up with that i did just now i've never thought about that before no i was like i can't think of anyone that is perfect because he's kind of got dead eyes and he kind of is charmed like he's not hot enough to be like hot charming but he's like charming enough to be like hot because he's charming you trust that face yeah we just have to dye the hair and he could become a little like the eyebrows need to get a little more pointed Yeah, he has to get a little more sinister And probably a little skinnier But that guy in like a cable net sweater Who's like, please help me to my Volkswagen That doesn't have a passenger seat in it?

[185] You're fucking Greg Kinnear You're getting in there Dude What do you got?

[186] The show's called high maintenance What that wasn't not even close to what I fucking Deadbeat is the one where the guy's roommate was a ghost Jesus Christ From what?

[187] Oh my God I've heard of high maintenance It's really good Okay, high maintenance is what we're trying to say Yes, and the episode is called Grandpa, and it says when Chasin is sensitive yet fun -loving dog Gatsby moved from the suburban Midwest to Queens, culture shock takes its toll until they cross -pass with Beth, acute, whimsical dog walker.

[188] Yeah, ale.

[189] But this episode has nothing to do with the season.

[190] It's like the whole show is about this dude, high maintenance, who sells pot on his bike.

[191] And then there's this random dog episode.

[192] And he's like, the guy's in it, but he's not.

[193] the episode isn't about him.

[194] And it's just such a gorgeous, listen, everyone has been fucking commenting and being like, thank you for recommending Fleabag.

[195] It was amazing.

[196] So fucking trust me right now, please.

[197] They do.

[198] I know.

[199] Were you yelling at me?

[200] No. I'm yelling at the fucking that I got that wrong.

[201] So wrong.

[202] Jesus Christ.

[203] You know, I bet you like Fleabag and then Deadbeat almost seems like the beat in between high maintenance and Fleabag.

[204] Deadbeat Fleabag.

[205] Deadbeat Flea bag.

[206] High maintenance.

[207] I just want to know who makes that show that they can go to fucking HBO and say, you don't get to give us notes.

[208] I think that they don't care.

[209] Like, I think that they're not, I don't know, like someone I knew who's really cool who makes documentaries was friends with them, and they don't give a shit.

[210] Who is it?

[211] It's a husband and wife team Ben Sinclair and Katja Leachfeld.

[212] Huh.

[213] So they're like, fuck you, dude.

[214] We're fucking good.

[215] Yeah, it usually doesn't work that way.

[216] No. That's what I'm saying.

[217] No. So that's very cool.

[218] You'll cry.

[219] You know who else did that?

[220] Who?

[221] All of the people who would be, I believe, James Burroughs, Matt Graining, everybody who said they were going to make The Simpsons.

[222] They went to Fox and said, we'll make this, but you don't get to give us notes.

[223] Like, who were they?

[224] All they've done is the Tracy Elman show at that point, right?

[225] No, no, no. James Burroughs, he's like legend, right?

[226] Like they had basically, yeah, they basically said, we'll make this deal with you and all that, but you just can't.

[227] They won't do that again.

[228] They won't.

[229] tell my favorite murder, the comedy TV show.

[230] Boy, that's also a game show.

[231] That's what's called.

[232] Comes out and we're like, you can't tell us what to do.

[233] And they're like, great.

[234] Well, we're not getting you a TV show.

[235] Fine.

[236] Go ahead.

[237] Sank your goddamn boat.

[238] We got a podcast.

[239] Oh, you know what you even mentioned is that this is the first fucking episode in my new apartment.

[240] Yeah, that's right.

[241] That's what we should be talking about.

[242] We should start with that and how high these ceilings are.

[243] Yes.

[244] This is cathedral -esque.

[245] I mean, you'd think that if they were going to make ceilings as high, they would also not make them fucking.

[246] popcorn but I guess I'm not an architect so I don't know but however look you can you can take that out you can scrape it off you know how much that costs so much money I know I was just trying to make you feel better thank you but I don't care it's fine it looks great you know they're so high up you can't see it okay yes popcorn ceiling and Venetian blinds kill me but I are not what are they called what are those called yeah I think those are like horizontal or vertical blinds vertical well anyways I hate them But otherwise, this apartment is amazing.

[247] This is a great apartment.

[248] Yeah, right?

[249] Yeah, and also you just moved here.

[250] You're like, you've got to get in and get your stuff going.

[251] This is the nicest place I've ever lived in my life.

[252] It's great.

[253] It's really fun.

[254] It's got a good open floor plan.

[255] Yeah.

[256] Good vibes.

[257] When the apocalypse comes, we're on the third floor, so like, we're safe.

[258] The water coming up, the people scratching at the side of the building, you're safe.

[259] Oh, it's good.

[260] All right.

[261] That's good.

[262] Oh, I forgot to mention this last week when it mattered when it had any fucking.

[263] All right.

[264] So these two dudes who are, who were into the podcast, message, Justin, were like, hey, we're super in the podcast.

[265] We're writing, we are writers on the show, the real O 'Neill's.

[266] Will you guys be in an episode?

[267] And Karen was like, I have a day job and have a fucking normal life.

[268] And I was like, I don't.

[269] I'll be on it.

[270] And so I went on and was on it.

[271] And it's on tonight, which is two days after this is going to hear.

[272] Two days.

[273] Yeah.

[274] Before.

[275] You will be two days after.

[276] right in hearing this but you can watch it online places that's right so it's the uh it's these fucking sweet angels josh kirby and john vellis who like they they wore so we recorded this thing and they wore my favorite murder shirts to the fucking recording of this episode like there was a ton of people on set and they every time someone would meet me and like i was an extra on too like they didn't have to be nice to me and they were like she has a pocket like they were so nice and wonderful people and and one of them was fucking henry zabrowski's college roommate, which is so insane.

[277] Anyways, I'm on it in a fucking dance sequence, and I get my baby stolen, and it's fun.

[278] You want to watch it?

[279] Check it out.

[280] Go watch Georgia.

[281] The Orphium this Saturday.

[282] That's right.

[283] That should be exciting.

[284] The L .A. Riot Fest Comedy Festival, and we're at the Orphium Theater.

[285] Should we put it up next week?

[286] If it doesn't suck.

[287] Yes.

[288] That should be the bar.

[289] If we can have a week off, we should try so hard on Saturday so we can have a week off.

[290] Actually, yes, let's try really hard because I need a week off because work is getting insane.

[291] Are you bet to start filming?

[292] The week after, yeah.

[293] Oh, God.

[294] So you're like twisting all the knob.

[295] What do you call it?

[296] Yeah, we're going to twist some knobs and we're going to push some levers up and then pull them back down.

[297] All that stuff, which is really hard for me. The stuff I don't like the most.

[298] I can't even chew gum and chew gum at the same time.

[299] Ugh, it's the worst.

[300] Should we, when should, like, let's, I was thinking that we could have Guy back on, Guy Brennan back on, who's show you're currently on, yeah.

[301] But what if we, like, have people write it and ask their legal questions that they're curious about?

[302] Like, what the fuck is this thing and that thing?

[303] Like, you have to write it in that sentence.

[304] And then he's like, yeah, I don't know, I don't know what those things are.

[305] Yeah, okay.

[306] Oh, no, no, no, no. I was just trying to make a joke.

[307] I don't know.

[308] Yeah, I think, yeah, if we had something specific and, like, let it through to a certain topic.

[309] Okay.

[310] We should have him back on them because that was a good episode.

[311] No, he's great.

[312] Very good.

[313] And then it's, like, just kind of a fun.

[314] It's fun to have a third person.

[315] Yeah, and not tell horrifying murder stories.

[316] Hey, speaking of, hey, is there anything else you want to?

[317] Correction Corner, merch corner, my favorite murder shirts.

[318] dot com we're about we're doing we're working on new designs and things and stuff and it's going to be great forever oh and my favorite murder .com for the live show stuff we have a show in uh pennsylvania that we need to sell more tickets for guys oh yeah so go on to the website and if you live in pennsylvania and you go on there and you see if it's near you i don't know but wait you have a story about your uber driver dude that's my to write shit down.

[319] Dude.

[320] Oh my God.

[321] Let's start over.

[322] Let me start with this.

[323] Uh, uh, thank you for reminding me. No, that's why I write things on my list.

[324] My therapist today, I was like, what do I?

[325] What's wrong with my memory?

[326] And she was like, well, you're sleep deprived and anxious.

[327] Those will fuck with your memory.

[328] I'm like, okay, I feel good about it, but now I don't feel good about it.

[329] Okay.

[330] So we were, I was, I got an Uber to go to our cracked podcast live show at UCB, which I think they're going to put up soon, which was so much fucking fun and cracked podcasts as they're like awesome dudes.

[331] So on my way there, like do -to -do, I get picked up.

[332] First, I'm leaving a party and I shame Vince and Joe DeRosa for like saying goodbye and like leaving me there to wait for an Uber.

[333] I don't know why I'm saying them.

[334] I'm just shaming them.

[335] So I get picked up by this dude who looks like he could murder me, but he ended up being super fucking cool.

[336] He looks like he goes.

[337] he looks like he goes outside of burning man you know what i mean like he stays near like he stays real real outsider yeah like he can't afford tickets and he like sells drugs outside of burning man but he but like i feel safest around those people more than like normal people those are your people yeah sure those burning men outside people yeah so he's like so what do you go into ucb for and like chitty chat the way i hate ubers do and then i was like oh you know i'm just i have this podcast.

[338] And he was like, what is it about?

[339] I'm like, oh, murder.

[340] And, you know, kind of like slowly he got some out of it.

[341] And then he was like, oh, hey, uh, what's funny?

[342] I grew up a couple doors down from John Wayne Gacy.

[343] And I was like, wait, what?

[344] And I was like, right around the time.

[345] He's like, uh -huh.

[346] I went to a party where my friend, uh, had him as a clown at our party.

[347] Wait, he was a kid.

[348] He was a kid.

[349] His friend hired John Wayne Gacy to be a clown.

[350] Pogo the clown.

[351] Pogo the clown at his birthday party.

[352] And he said that, yeah, he, like, John Wingasey would come to their school and watch wrestling matches.

[353] And I was like, well, wasn't it weird?

[354] And he was like, yeah, everyone knew it was weird that this guy was into it.

[355] But he would then bring them back to his house and his wife.

[356] And I was like, wait, he had a wife?

[357] He's like, yeah.

[358] Yeah, yeah.

[359] He would bring them down.

[360] And then what you told me before is how he would be like, let's have this wrestling thing.

[361] I'm going to put you in handcuffs.

[362] Yeah.

[363] He knew all that because that happened to people in his town.

[364] And his wife would just be like, oh, he brought these kids down with him and they never came back up.

[365] Whatever.

[366] Yeah, that's the wife that eventually left him because she just kept that kept happening.

[367] And she's just like, this is so weird.

[368] She wasn't like calling the cop.

[369] She was just like, goodbye.

[370] She didn't know what was going on down there.

[371] It was just kind of like, it's boys.

[372] You don't leave someone with not, like knowing what's going on.

[373] Oh, yeah.

[374] It was the 70s.

[375] And then people did that all the time in their marriages.

[376] just like we're going to go have man time in our man cave downstairs and she's like okay i'm going to bed but with children like if she was suspicious enough to leave him she should have told the cops of her suspicions oh i i i can't speak to this at all i don't know anyways so yeah like on my way to what i coulda you know what i mean like should have not married him to be a i mean you're married a clown look listen look and listen look learn the handcuffs alone get out of there Yeah.

[377] Like, no, the going to wrestling matches and having kids over for wrestling alone.

[378] Like, if we started doing that, I'd be like, well, this isn't going to.

[379] This will not stand.

[380] You're going to prison.

[381] You'd be like one hand on the hip.

[382] Hey, listen, mister.

[383] Yeah.

[384] 911 on the other hand.

[385] Well, that's awesome.

[386] I mean, that's the magic of getting into just anyone's car.

[387] Try it.

[388] Everyone give it a shot.

[389] That's why we have this podcast.

[390] It's going to get into people's cars.

[391] It was kind of funny, though, because on my way, of course, Georgia got there before me because I was late, and on my way, I was texting like, I'm on my way here, whatever, and then Georgia texts, my Uber driver used to live across the street from John Wayne Gacy, and then I was like, you are lying.

[392] And I just, all my responses were accusing her being a liar.

[393] Like, I make shit up all the time.

[394] I just wouldn't accept it.

[395] This is not the truth.

[396] And I was like, I'm not fucking kidding.

[397] the other thing I was going to say is and I want to say that I was trying to look up the name but I realized I was being rude to you so I just put my phone down but I'm pretty I want to say her name is Marjorie I don't think that's right though but we have a person who listens to our podcast and loves it and also who comes to mine in April's improv lab show every month which we really appreciate because God knows you don't want an empty room at the improv lab when you're trying to do a comedy show.

[398] It's every first Wednesday of every month?

[399] It's the second Wednesday, I think, of every month.

[400] Second Wednesday of every month.

[401] At the improv on Melrose.

[402] Yes, at 10 p .m. It's called Business Class.

[403] It's a real good time.

[404] But anyway, there's a girl that I met there on our first business class and who was like, love the podcast, blah, blah, blah.

[405] And has come been super supportive.

[406] Well, I walked in to the last show we did, and there's like, like kind of an entrance way at the at the improv where people stand around smoke and talk or whatever and she's just sitting at a table with her friends and just as I walked by she just held out her hand and held and handed me three decks of cards so I stopped and I was like hey what's going on and then I look and they're the they're the cold case cards that we were talking about on the podcast and she got them for us we all got a pack and it's we got two Florida's and a Connecticut, I believe.

[407] They're the cards that, excuse me, they're the cards that the law enforcement would, like, deck of cards, a playing cards that the law enforcement would give to inmates to play cards with, but there would also be cold cases of, like, murders and all these things on each one, like explaining them, hoping that one of the, one of the people in prison would recognize them or feel like impelled impelled compelled thank you in prison and compelled I just made those in a one word yeah you just combined it uh to talk which was a good idea and when you look at them it's kind of creepy but then it's also fascinating like you just want to look at every single card sorry Stephen just handed me her name and it is Miranda same thing Miranda what did I say like Miranda rights Maribel some horrible thing Miranda thank you so much for thinking of us and getting the thing that we were so excited to even talk about.

[408] Yeah, no, it's super cool.

[409] It was basically, this is like the partner item to the murder cards that we were, the baseball cards that we were looking at that Stephen got for us for Christmas.

[410] I mean, we're just going to keep fucking compiling cards.

[411] We just love cards.

[412] Hallmark paint chip cards.

[413] Yeah.

[414] All right, that's all our business, right?

[415] I think so.

[416] Has it been 45 minutes yet?

[417] We got to hit that mark.

[418] Cut half them.

[419] that out, Steven.

[420] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.

[421] Absolutely.

[422] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash.

[423] Exactly.

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[426] That's right.

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[440] Goodbye.

[441] Hey, this is exciting.

[442] An all new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[443] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster detectives.

[444] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[445] Who killed Saz?

[446] And were they really after Charles?

[447] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[448] This season, murder hits close to home.

[449] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[450] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[451] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[452] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[453] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfenakis, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, Davey, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[454] Only murders in the building, premieres, August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[455] Bye.

[456] Thank you're first.

[457] All right.

[458] I'm going to take it.

[459] I'm going to fucking take it.

[460] Take it and do it.

[461] Limit.

[462] Love it.

[463] Limit.

[464] To the limit.

[465] Close time.

[466] Very close time.

[467] Yes.

[468] What was the theme?

[469] Can you think of the tune?

[470] Yes.

[471] Hold on because my mom worked there for a while.

[472] Wait.

[473] Start it.

[474] Something, something.

[475] Close.

[476] that's not it something something remember the one where remember the one where it was like a girl getting ready in her room and you would walk like you were watching through the window and I ended up being like a dude cross -dressing but it was like so edgy and cool what are you talking about was that for Banana Republic they there was Charlotte Roos like they had it in between like I swear this was on like America's most wanted like commercials I want to make Stephen look it up, but it's just so complicated.

[477] I mean, I can't even...

[478] It was for close time.

[479] All I can think it was...

[480] I think it was close time.

[481] I went to see the Golden Girls Live, which is Drew Drogey, Jackie Beat, Sam Pancake, Sherry Vine, unbelievable word -for -word reenactments of Golden Girls episodes.

[482] Is that what it is?

[483] I see it on Instagram, but I don't know what it is.

[484] You have to go.

[485] It's so funny.

[486] I told Joe DeRoso about it because he is obsessed with the Golden Girls.

[487] Oh, my God.

[488] And he was, like, so mad that he had gone.

[489] But H. L. and Scott, he has a Golden Girls podcast.

[490] Have you met him?

[491] He's the best.

[492] No. You got to bring him.

[493] But in between the scenes, they go to real, like, mid -80s commercials.

[494] And so there was the Shasta commercial.

[495] I can't breathe.

[496] I want to pop.

[497] I want to Shasta.

[498] There were all these commercials that I haven't seen.

[499] The bubble gum one with two twins?

[500] Double -bubble?

[501] Double -met?

[502] Double -min gum.

[503] It's a statement of the great men from double -met -gum.

[504] close i can everything i remember clothes time is because my mom worked for them and they had this commercial where the like cute hot model would walk out and like kick her leg and like keep walking i was like close time and so my mom told like came home crying a day it was like i was walking out of a meeting and i tried to do like close time kick like as a cute joke to end and she like put my skirt caught and she just her skirt was too tight and she just kicked both her legs out of her and fell down Oh no That's such a Georgia move So I cannot think of Close time without my mom kicking her fucking legs up Close time is like the place Where we beg my mom to take us And she'd get shoulder pads She would be exhausted from work And we'd be like I just need one shirt And you'd want to like shop the whole store And my mom would be like five more minutes And like going crazy Like cheap hangers and these like sad metal fucking racks and nothing ever fit me for everything was too small where i'd be like i want these tiny pants but i couldn't wear anything for us that was mimi's cafe and my mom would order a fucking glass of wine from the poor fucking uh hostess who couldn't serve wine and just sit in the fucking waiting area oh waiting for a table just chug wine cool moms anyway oh wow where are we what's happening has it been 45 minutes yet okay great we're almost there i'm about to blow my nose on my shirt really she actually did it can you confirm actually just happen don't have a tissue can everyone confirm that that was a little i don't have a tissue it's okay she doesn't give a fuck it was either my shirt or my cat that was on my lap and i chose my shirt all right okay all right here we go who all right so remember that's done and we'll take it too but no not the same thing not the same thing all right so uh last week i talked about uh megan's your serious voice okay yeah with clearly i'm about to there's a cross -eyed cat staring at me the whole time um mangan's law talked about that right so then i was like hey what's another one of those that like we don't know the history of so so january 17th in 1996 which is is exactly 21 years ago today.

[505] So nine -year -old Amber Hagerman is riding her bike in the parking lot of an abandoned Winn -Dixie in Arlington, Texas, and she's with her five -year -old brother.

[506] Have you been to Wohen Dixie?

[507] No. I haven't.

[508] Have you been in an abandoned parking lot?

[509] Kind of, but just the idea of it, it simply would not happen.

[510] Today?

[511] Not since 95.

[512] I feel like this idea of children alone anywhere.

[513] Even 96 seems like to...

[514] I think that like it took a lot of small towns a while to catch up.

[515] Right, because people thought, oh no, not here and it's safe here and that stuff.

[516] But like these days?

[517] Never.

[518] Never.

[519] They wouldn't allow people, they wouldn't allow people like children in an abandoned parking lot.

[520] They would like block it off, right?

[521] Or like you wouldn't be able to get on.

[522] But also anyone.

[523] passing by would call the police.

[524] If there was two, a five -year -old and a seven -year -old riding their bikes, it would be like a major.

[525] Okay.

[526] Well, here's why.

[527] Yeah.

[528] But here, okay.

[529] So, they were about two blocks from their grandma's house.

[530] It was broad, fucking daylight, and someone drives into the parking lot, grabs Amber off of her bicycle.

[531] Like, they didn't even try to, like, he just grabs her and drives her away in his black pickup truck.

[532] there's one witness to step forward and he was a neighbor's name was Jim Cavill he's a 78 year old retiree witness is a whole thing and calls the police right away and he says she was by herself I saw this pickup he pulled up jumped out and grabbed her when she screamed I figured the police I don't know about it so I called them that's so fucking Arlington Texas like well figured the cops should know he was nearby about, and so he, this is how he described the person, that he was a white or Hispanic male, 25 to 40, under six feet tall, medium bill driving a late 1980s or early 1990s model full -sized American -made black truck.

[533] And then, so Amber's brother, Ricky, goes home, tells his parents what happened.

[534] They're freaking out.

[535] In the abandoned parking lot of the Wind Dixie, there's also a laundry.

[536] laundromat and I guess it was full of customers but police thought that a lot of them were in the country illegally and so when the cops fucking swarm they got the fuck out of there yeah um and there was a truck that was similar to that of the kidnappers spotted outside before she was taken outside of the laundromat but no one ever came forward and said that they know who it was and there was a $75 ,000 reward that also had the promise that they wouldn't be deported if they came forward with information, but no one ever came forward, which I think that they would have if they had known something, right?

[537] That's a lot of fucking money.

[538] Yeah, it is.

[539] There's a huge search, and then four days later, a security guard who's walking his dog late at night stumbles upon the nude body of Amber.

[540] it's she's in a creek behind an apartment complex which is less than five miles from the grocery store parking lot um Amber only has on a sock on her right foot and an autopsy reveals that her kidnapper had kept her alive for two days and she was beaten and sexually assaulted and then her throat was slashed and she was dumped behind the apartment complex which like makes you think that he lived there, or at least knew someone who lived there and was staying in town and had some time alone.

[541] Like, I don't think it would be someone who actually lives there because it's too obvious.

[542] Yeah, it wouldn't make a lot of sense.

[543] Yeah, like you're staying at your back door.

[544] Right.

[545] You're staying at your brother -in -law's apartment while he's out of town.

[546] And, yeah.

[547] So after the funeral, a woman named Diana Simone, she's just a random woman.

[548] She's a massage therapist and a mother and she's from Dallas and she fucking calls the radio station and she's like hey if if you guys can alert the public to severe weather why the fuck can't you do the same thing for when children are abducted she's just like put some shit together and he's like what the fuck yeah wait say her name again her name is diana simone yeah so she's a badass motherfucker um and she says and i wish i could do this in a fucking dallas accent but i don't want to be insulting that she says they're saying Amber was taken at four o 'clock in the afternoon thrown in a pickup truck and driven somewhere and that nobody saw anything and then she says I'm sorry that's not possible the problem was not that people didn't see them it's that they didn't know what they were seeing yeah so nine months after Amber's death radio stations and law enforcement officials and North Texas launch what they call America's missing broadcast emergency response or Amber alerts.

[549] They relay reports of kidnappings to the public and it's an emergency response system that disseminates information about a missing person, usually a child by media broadcasting or electronic roadway signs.

[550] As of December 23rd, 2015, there have been 800 children rescued and returned specifically because of Amber Alert.

[551] But unfortunately Amber Hagerman's abduction and murder has never been solved.

[552] Oh, no. I know.

[553] And her mom's, Amber's mom says, I know Amber would be very proud of this.

[554] She was always another mommy to all my children, but I also want people to remember Amber that she had to sacrifice her life for Amber Alert.

[555] So like, mom isn't like, you know, empowered and proud of this shit.

[556] She's fucking, she's, it's, it's bittersweet for her, you know, like, why did her, why did her daughter have to be the fucking name?

[557] of this.

[558] Her child died, yeah.

[559] So sad.

[560] So last year was the 20th anniversary, and they're always like, we're going to get them.

[561] And it's sad.

[562] And her poor, poor brother, who is five is just like, he's, I'm sure he's a mess.

[563] Okay.

[564] So, all right.

[565] So it's never been solved.

[566] But after I did some like sleuthing, the thing I found that the only like connection to an actual person that could possibly be involved that I found was, okay, so in 2010 DNA identified a man that 25 years ago had kidnapped, sexually assaulted, and slit the throat of eight -year -old Jennifer Shewitt.

[567] And Jennifer survived.

[568] Wow.

[569] And I wrote and kicked major ass at healing and working on herself.

[570] She's made her life's mission to speak out on behalf of victims.

[571] After her Jennifer's attack, she lay dying in this fucking field of her.

[572] That's an I survived.

[573] Yep.

[574] Have you seen her with the pink hair?

[575] She's kind of like punk and got like pink hair and she's kind of like punk and got.

[576] And the guy took her out of her bedroom through the window?

[577] Oh dude.

[578] And I know.

[579] Okay.

[580] She, I mean, this chick is like the epitome of like, here's how you get back your life.

[581] Yeah, big time.

[582] She's amazing.

[583] Yes.

[584] So she was in the field at eight years old.

[585] for 12 hours before she was discovered.

[586] And in her hospital bed, she had to scribble notes to the police.

[587] And she said that her attacker said her name, his name was Dennis.

[588] And she did this amazing sketch.

[589] Like she was fucking on it.

[590] And in it, she was like, I knew I was going to die.

[591] And I was going to get every little information, like bit of information burn into my head.

[592] And it turns out that the dude was a 40 -year -old welder from North Little Rock, Arkansas.

[593] He had a wife and three kids and his DNA was on file because he had been like he has a fucking rap sheet of assaulting and kidnapping women.

[594] There's a ghost train going by my fucking new apartment.

[595] Okay.

[596] So he had been he had been, you know, the normal arrested for rape and assault and only got this many months.

[597] And in one case, a weekend in prison for for rape for it got you know bargained down to pled down to like you know bullshit stuff so he had never actually been really convicted of kidnapping he confesses to kidnapping raping and trying to kill jennifer eschewitt um her body was she was lying naked on her back on top of her of a fire ant nest 14 hours later she woke up covered in fire ants she couldn't move she tried to scream something about the fire ants though kept her alive and I don't know I don't know where it is I think if I'm remembering this correctly because this is another one that's like crazy I survived if you can see it she's one of those people like you said the way she talks about it you're like badass yeah like there's you know there's something inside of you when you're losing a lot of blood you're not supposed to go to sleep like so you don't lose consciousness.

[598] And I think they kept her awake.

[599] Oh my God.

[600] No, no, no. I'm pretty sure.

[601] I'm pretty sure.

[602] You should watch her I survived.

[603] Look up Jennifer and whatever city in Texas this is because she tells the story.

[604] It's chilling.

[605] Yeah.

[606] Okay.

[607] So she's, so he gets arrested for all of this, which is so similar.

[608] And this was in, uh, in Texas.

[609] and she had been kidnapped from a Texas apartment.

[610] So, I mean, it's so similar.

[611] I don't think they have DNA from Amber's body, so there's really no way to tie it together.

[612] And unfortunately, this motherfucking dick sucker killed himself in 2010.

[613] But he had confessed, and she says, you chose the wrong little 45 -pound eight -year -old girl to try and murder.

[614] Because for 19 years, I've thought of you every single day, and help search for you.

[615] And every year that's passed has given me more strength and drive for when I finally would be face to face with you as I am today in his sentencing, she said.

[616] But motherfucking Bradford hanged himself in his cell.

[617] And that's it.

[618] And I mean...

[619] So he went to jail for that attack.

[620] He did.

[621] Oh, that's good at least.

[622] And he killed himself.

[623] Yeah.

[624] So, I mean, it's just such a similar...

[625] An eight -year -old girl that he kidnapped.

[626] Mm -hmm.

[627] A part slit her throat, left her for dead.

[628] this one happened to survive in Texas, you know, in the 90s.

[629] It's just so Amber, another like person who's done a lot, but at the expense of their life.

[630] He looked bummed.

[631] What's that?

[632] He looked bummed.

[633] Yeah.

[634] Yeah, it's a bummer.

[635] It is a bummer.

[636] But I think it's an important story.

[637] Yeah, of course.

[638] And it's horrifying that he was never found.

[639] Like, what the fuck?

[640] well yeah like there were i was really surprised that you said that because that that i know of that little girl because of amber alerts and so i just completely assumed that that was a fully like a case that came all the way around and that there was a prosecution for it and that was part of it those two cases that one in um mangan's law it's like they're more horrifying than you would expect them to be and uh they've done a lot but it's just so heartbreaking.

[641] Yeah.

[642] It's so awful.

[643] And it's just so, they had so much information to go on based on that truck that, you know, the fact that there was a system set up.

[644] They didn't find her.

[645] Yeah.

[646] Is scary.

[647] And I feel like someone knows their brother -in -law or ex -brother -in -law or cousin or uncle, you know, is suspicious, but don't want to come forward.

[648] Yeah.

[649] Like it's always that, you know.

[650] Yeah.

[651] Or your other guy.

[652] Yeah.

[653] But.

[654] Someone, yeah.

[655] Yeah.

[656] Well, that's a good one.

[657] Well, mine is super gross and upsetting.

[658] It's, but it's, I feel like it's always a tiny bit better when we, when it's not a child murder.

[659] Yeah.

[660] Right?

[661] Those are the ones that just get us.

[662] I'm sorry.

[663] I know, but I think they're important.

[664] Of course.

[665] I mean, it's horrifying.

[666] There's no like, what?

[667] Yes, they're definitely.

[668] I'm apologizing because it's like it's a hard thing to talk about in here.

[669] So this one is we have gotten so many tweets about it and so many requests to do this one that I was like, who the fuck is this guy that people keep on being like, how could you not have done this yet?

[670] And so I started looking into it and there are so, it is so detailed that what I did was tapped old Sarge Morris.

[671] No, you didn't.

[672] And I was like, can you help me do research?

[673] yeah girl that's not going to make any sense until the week after this episode i don't care by then it's going to have caught like wildfire serge morris over here so that's awesome uh yeah so this is um this is stephen a morris's research uh but it's such a good story and it's super intense it's the story of luka magnata the canadian yes dude dude dude tell me everything we are always think the Canadians are so chill.

[674] Sweet angels.

[675] There are maple syrup and there are flags.

[676] But not this specific one who was born Eric Clinton, Kirk Newman, on July 24th, 1982 in Scarborough, Ontario.

[677] When he was 21, not, we don't know that much about his childhood, but when he was 21, we know that he started stripping in a Toronto club and appearing in low -budget gay porn.

[678] so not a glamorous life.

[679] And that was in 2003 and 2004.

[680] He was convicted of impersonation and fraud after he befriended a mentally incapacitated 21 -year -old woman, applied for credit cards in her name, and charged up $10 ,000 in fees.

[681] So this guy's got some fucking straight off the 21 -year -old bat -ish.

[682] Issues.

[683] Issues.

[684] Issues.

[685] Some serious.

[686] issues.

[687] Okay.

[688] I would say narcissism was going to be in there at some point.

[689] Sociopathy?

[690] Perhaps a sociops.

[691] Let's throw them all in there.

[692] So he was, before he was sentenced to nine months of community service and 12 months, probation, his lawyer actually showed the court a medical record claiming that he had significant psychiatric issues.

[693] Wow.

[694] I want to read those reports so bad.

[695] I know.

[696] Like details.

[697] Yeah.

[698] Like some psychologist is sitting there in a fucking room with him and they're like, oh, shit.

[699] I'm going to underline significance.

[700] Yeah, this person just like tried to get some money off a person, but this motherfucker is like...

[701] This motherfucker is manipulating mentally handicapped people to get credit cards.

[702] And has like, yes.

[703] Okay.

[704] That's enough.

[705] So this is just we're laying down a base coat.

[706] Like when you do your nails.

[707] This is the primer.

[708] This is like when you're making a, where you're making something and you put in the what's the thing with the you know the carrots and the celery and the rue not a rue is the like uh sauce no you're right listen i have a cooking no i don't listen i'm from the cooking town a rue okay so then no wait no it's mere poise a mere poise you mean you cut up the onions yes a rue is the yes so okay the rue is the start of something else?

[709] Like a Bechma sauce.

[710] Great.

[711] I was like, wow.

[712] It's been a while.

[713] Okay, so in 2006, he legally changes his name from Eric Clinton Newman to Luca Rocco Magnata.

[714] So that's a completely made up name.

[715] Why did he?

[716] Which I love it.

[717] He wanted to seem Italian.

[718] You know how Italians are.

[719] So he applies for bankruptcy in March of 2007, citing citing illness, lack of employment, insufficient income to pay off his debts.

[720] Hey, we've all been there.

[721] But then, after the bankruptcy, his quest for fame kicks into high gear.

[722] He was questing for fame?

[723] He's questing for fame in a big way.

[724] So he wants money.

[725] He wants to live Sheila E's glamorous life.

[726] Oh, like you and I know, like at this point, like fame isn't it?

[727] Like what people say it is.

[728] Steen cut that part out.

[729] Fame is still popcorn ceiling, man. You got to get that popcorn ceiling life.

[730] There's a lot R. Kelly song called popcorn ceiling.

[731] So, okay, so here's what he does.

[732] He auditions for a reality show called Cover Guy.

[733] You can see the opening credits now.

[734] No, no, I'm saying, in your mind.

[735] Cover Guy.

[736] He declares in his casting video that, quote, a lot of people tell me I'm devastatingly good looking.

[737] You know that that shit would sell now, but like whatever year that was, I was like, what is this shit?

[738] What are you doing?

[739] He was not chosen.

[740] He was a reject from cover guy?

[741] From cover guy.

[742] Like, what'll break your heart more?

[743] Then, well, this, that he auditions for the reality show, plastic makes perfect.

[744] Oh, no. Flanting his multiple hair transplants, nose job explaining how he wanted to get pectoral implants.

[745] He was rejected.

[746] yeah explain my face right now so it's just not the fame plan is not going uh as expected to get rejected from the bottom of the barrel like you know is the bottom of the barrel show you're not good enough for a plastic surgery show yeah um so uh so then what he started to do was focus his efforts online so he um twice created Wikipedia pages for him himself, only to have them taken down by the self -policing community.

[747] Imagine what was on this.

[748] It's Wikipedia.

[749] Imagine the self -clicing community is like, they let so much shit fly.

[750] And then they're like, this fucking idiot?

[751] Not this guy.

[752] Not this fucking idiot.

[753] Then he created the rumor on message boards that he was dating Carla Homolka, the wife of Paul Bernardo, who killed two teenagers.

[754] along with raping and murdering her own sister.

[755] Oh, my God.

[756] This is how, okay, I did not understand.

[757] I, in my mind, whenever I saw people write this thing, I thought he was Paul Burr.

[758] I think I got these whole thing, like these whole thing is confused.

[759] So this is exciting.

[760] So this is a guy who, he creates the rumor on message boards that he is dating her.

[761] But he's not the one who killed her sister.

[762] No, that's her husband.

[763] Oh my God.

[764] I thought he was a husband.

[765] He really did that.

[766] Then the husband goes to jail.

[767] Okay, okay, okay.

[768] She, I think, goes to jail.

[769] for a while, but then gets out.

[770] And then he decides to tell people he's dating her now that she's out.

[771] To get that kind of infamy.

[772] That's the level of celebrity he's going for now.

[773] But then he calls into a radio show to deny the rumors that he started online.

[774] Then he visits a newsroom in Toronto.

[775] And that's the first time he's on mainstream press talking about it and denying it.

[776] Oh, sorry, he said he dated her in the 90s, not when she got out of jail.

[777] All right.

[778] So then there's many profiles on various internet, social media, and discussion forums created over several years to plant false or unverified claims about him.

[779] And he would himself immediately dismiss these as rumors and hoaxes and a campaign of cyber -stalking.

[780] according to the police Magnata set up at least 70 Facebook pages and 20 websites under different names.

[781] 70 Facebook pages?

[782] Yeah.

[783] Can you imagine how many naps that is?

[784] I mean how many other things could you have been doing?

[785] Naps.

[786] How much more plastic surgery could you have gotten?

[787] In 2010 this is the part where it's going to turn and you're going to get upset.

[788] Okay.

[789] Do children get murdered?

[790] No. Well then I don't care.

[791] Okay.

[792] In 2010, he posted a video called One Boy, Two Kittens.

[793] Oh, no. Where he asphyxated two tabby cats.

[794] Wait, what?

[795] Using a vacuum cleaner.

[796] Yeah, and a plastic bag.

[797] This is why I've never heard of him.

[798] And until he was tracked down, he was just known as the vacuum kitten killer.

[799] How does that even work?

[800] So you put.

[801] Oh, my God.

[802] Yeah.

[803] That was a big jump.

[804] from 70 Facebook.

[805] I know.

[806] Well, here's the thing.

[807] All that other stuff isn't working.

[808] So he keeps doing things, attempt after attempt after attempt.

[809] He just wants attention.

[810] He doesn't care what kind it is.

[811] Right.

[812] So then he's because he's a sociopath because he doesn't really care and he doesn't have any empathy.

[813] Jesus Christ.

[814] He does that.

[815] Oh my God.

[816] Okay.

[817] Okay.

[818] Now we're in 2012 and it is May 26th and a Montana lawyer named Roger Renville sees a bizarre internet video depicting a man being stabbed and dismembered.

[819] He alerts U .S. and Canadian police about this video, and they dismiss it as a fake.

[820] He just saw it, like, where?

[821] It was posted, so it was uploaded.

[822] It was called One Lunatic One Ice Pick, and it was uploaded to two gore sites.

[823] which were super explicit places that were just like super violent.

[824] I love that this guy who's like on gore sites is like this is too much for me. Like what, you know, like it had to be that awful.

[825] Well, he's a lawyer, so maybe he was looking on there for this reason.

[826] Okay.

[827] Well, because he reported it to the police.

[828] So it looked real.

[829] Like, oh, maybe he's like seen gore, like real crime scenes and bodies so he knows what it looks like.

[830] Yeah, that's kind of, I think that's what they said.

[831] Holy shit.

[832] Meanwhile, Luca Magnata has flown from Montreal to Paris, and when he arrives in Paris, he was wearing a wig and a Mickey Mouse t -shirt.

[833] Super chill.

[834] And then, so basically that was on the 26th, it was when he flew to Paris.

[835] Three days later on the 29th, the residents of his apartment building start complaining of a foul smell.

[836] Nope, never complain of a foul smell.

[837] So the janitor then discovers a suitcase.

[838] next to a mountain of garbage bags behind the building and inside is the headless torso of a man. Oh, my God.

[839] Now, 6 p .m. that same night, a package containing a human foot is received at the Conservative Party of Canada headquarters in Ottawa.

[840] And it had been mailed from Montreal.

[841] At 9 p .m., a package addressed to the Liberal Party headquarters in Ottawa was discovered by postal employees to contain a human hand.

[842] What the fuck?

[843] So after taking statements and finding evidence in the trash, including a blunt instrument and papers identifying Luke and Magnata, the police enter his apartment.

[844] So like he did this on purpose, like sent this shit, like knowingly that it was his stuff, like going to lead to him on purpose?

[845] Sounds like it.

[846] No. What do you mean?

[847] Never mind.

[848] No, I don't think so.

[849] Okay.

[850] So police enter his apartment, and it's actually a very dark studio apartment.

[851] And then they find a bloody mattress and blood in the refrigerator and scrawled in red ink inside a closet or the words, if you don't like the reflection, don't look in the mirror.

[852] I don't care.

[853] Oh, my God.

[854] So an arrest warrant is issued for Luca Magnata.

[855] So the Interpol adds him to the wanted list, and people, he was in Paris, and he was declared an international fugitive, and he's, they start getting, you know, the cops start getting a ton of tips that he's at a bar, he's trying to crash a house party.

[856] He actually took the bus to Berlin.

[857] his name was all over the papers and all over television and the French media nicknamed him the butcher of Montreal and the German media nicknamed him the porno killer so the butcher of Montreal is way cooler he uh that's better so he gets to this is my favorite part he gets to in Berlin he gets to an internet cafe this is about a week after all that and the guy that's working there a man walks in wearing sunglasses and makeup and says bonjour internet and so the guy kind of notices him this episode is called bonjour internet right and so the guy working there recognizes this man's face who walked in but he can't place it and so he's looking at the guy so the guy goes over to a computer and you know know, rent it out.

[858] And the guy from his workstation is looking down at the monitor that this guy is using.

[859] And he noticed that this man, who's wearing sunglasses, is looking at article after article about the killer in Montreal.

[860] Oh, my God.

[861] And so then he puts it together that it's him.

[862] Can you imagine?

[863] So basically, they go up and they're just like, you're that guy, right?

[864] And he goes, you caught me. Um, oh, what in the fucking fun?

[865] Yes.

[866] So he basically got caught because he was Googling pictures of himself.

[867] You idiot.

[868] So, um, I feel like you just, there's nothing good that happens in internet cafes and.

[869] Yeah, not anymore.

[870] You know what I mean?

[871] Like, something's wrong.

[872] It's over now.

[873] Maybe 1997, 98.

[874] That was the last time.

[875] Yeah.

[876] Um, okay.

[877] So, uh, then on June 5th, the package containing a right foot was delivered to St. Georgia's school.

[878] Another package containing a right hand was sent to Falls Creek, elementary school in Vancouver both schools opened as normal in the following the following morning and it was confirmed that both packages were sent from Montreal but were they staggered like who was sending them then he was sending them all from Montreal but they were different places so like Vancouver's further away so magnata is arrested and then he's transferred to a Berlin prison hospital and a psychiatrist believes that he's in a psychotic state.

[879] So, meanwhile, the police identified the torso victim as Lin -Jun, and he's a 33 -year -old Chinese computer science student at Concordia University.

[880] It's unclear how he met Luca Mangata.

[881] And an internet cafe, I bet.

[882] Well, they say that Magada had been posting men seeking men in the men -seeking men.

[883] section of Craig's list under an alias.

[884] Oh, sad.

[885] And so basically, though, they go back and check the video and they see Lynn Jun had been, had entered Luca Magnata's apartment building, and then, like, the next day is when they see the video where Luca Magnata is taking things out and putting them in the garbage can.

[886] He just wanted to love and be loved and, like, got murdered.

[887] That's so sad.

[888] Yeah.

[889] Yeah.

[890] Yeah.

[891] So then he gets taken back to Canada on a military plane.

[892] And then they find Lynn John's skull at the edge of a small lake in Angrenon Park after they get an anonymous tip.

[893] So someone may have found it.

[894] And so not only does Luca Magnata go to trial, obviously he's arrested and charged with murder.

[895] but the police charged the website owner who posted one lunatic whatever the name of that video was that guy got charged with corrupting morals one lunatic one ice pick um why and he ended up going because it was real but he didn't know it was real well but it's his like responsibility he probably I think probably in watching it like the lawyer did you would know Yeah.

[896] God.

[897] So is it out there?

[898] Can you, like, I wonder if it's out there.

[899] I have no idea.

[900] Did you ever watch, like, um, what was that website?

[901] It wasn't sick .com, but it was something like that.

[902] Rotten .com?

[903] Rotten .com.

[904] Yeah.

[905] Did you ever click through that?

[906] Yeah.

[907] That's troubling.

[908] Yeah, it's a bummer.

[909] But I've seen, yeah, go on.

[910] So basically, he just goes to court and he ends up, they give him a, life sentence without the chance of parole for at least 25 years and they try to say in the court case that he's basically that he was crazy and it doesn't work and he gets basically the full extent and they added on all these other charges it was like first degree murder but then also committing an indignity to a human body publishing obscene material, criminally harassing, prime minister.

[911] I mean, all that sending stuff to government stuff made it all, you know.

[912] So did they say what he had, like, how he killed the guy and then, like, was the dismemberment after he was murdered?

[913] Well, it's all in the video.

[914] So it looked like he stabbed him to death and then dismembered him.

[915] Jesus Christ.

[916] Can you imagine if you'd, like, watch that being like, this is fake?

[917] And then, like, going back and being like, no, you fucking watched a murder.

[918] Well, that's why all that stuff is, like, why would you want that in your head?

[919] It's so, it's such a bummer and it's such bad vibes.

[920] Even if you're faking something like that, like, what the fuck are you doing?

[921] Well, I'll look up, like, crime scene photos sometimes.

[922] And then, like, there's ones that are like, they clearly can't be fake.

[923] And I'm like, nope, it's fake.

[924] It's like, I have to commit, like, commit to it being fake or else I'll lose my mind.

[925] Yeah, it's not.

[926] I don't think it's good to have those pictures in your head.

[927] Absolutely not.

[928] No. And it doesn't help you.

[929] It's not like you can't imagine what it might be like.

[930] Right, right.

[931] He also, so anyway, in 2015, Luca Magnolia, he tried to file an appeal for the convictions, but it didn't, it didn't work.

[932] And he actually withdrew the appeal himself.

[933] So apparently someone, I don't know if, I don't know what happened, but.

[934] I was like, cut it out.

[935] He was like, you know what?

[936] I'm going to drop this whole fame thing.

[937] Maybe I'm going to try to do something else.

[938] Finally.

[939] I'm just going to get into Buddhism So that's the story Now I understand why everybody was so obsessed with it Because it truly is insane and horrible And beyond I'm going to listen to other people now Because like I always thought that I always I never looked that one up Everyone does constantly want us to do that one And I always thought it was connected I got that one and that horrible couple Kind of tight The Palernardo case Yeah.

[940] I always kind of thought it was the same thing.

[941] I was like, I don't need to know about this one.

[942] Like, yeah, we know it's boring.

[943] You know, they fucked her sister and they killed her and like now she's out and it sucks.

[944] But like, I didn't realize.

[945] That's boring.

[946] No, it's just one of the ones that everyone knows about.

[947] Right.

[948] So I didn't realize I have never heard any of that.

[949] I know.

[950] Me, I didn't know it was that like crazy detailed.

[951] I didn't know he was like the idea that you're sending body parts to the prime minister or to like grammar school.

[952] all those things where and then knowing his whole thing of wanting to be famous like you're that needy that you would like he didn't murder someone because he wanted to murder someone he murdered someone so he could put the video up online and get famous.

[953] It does seem like that which is so gross I mean like I guess it's and it must be an element of most killers the thought that like everyone will know me or I'll have this power sure that I'll become renown or whatever but like most of those people do like what are the killings called when you're out in public and you kill a bunch of people?

[954] Like a mass murder?

[955] Like they do mass murders to do that.

[956] Not what he did, which is like so personal and creepy.

[957] And then it's almost like forcing other people to watch it.

[958] Well, and also it almost seems like just this lame modern version where it's just like, oh, I'll put it on YouTube.

[959] I mean, I'll put my super gross, you know, serious mental problem on YouTube and get a bunch of hips.

[960] And like force other people to have to deal with that, having seen that for the rest of their lives.

[961] Yeah, but I mean, that's the thing.

[962] If you're looking, you're going to find it.

[963] I know.

[964] I know.

[965] Like, you have to remember if you're on a horrible gore site, then that's what you might look at.

[966] And then you're going to have that in your head.

[967] Like, don't do it.

[968] As someone who, like, can't sleep at night, it's so easy to just kind of like, click on this thing and click on the next thing.

[969] And then suddenly you find yourself at this, like, place.

[970] And then suddenly you see some shit you don't want to see you, but you can't, like, away.

[971] It's like, not like you're, like, fucking typing in, like, man murders another man. It's like, you just, like, I've seen some shit that I didn't realize I didn't want to see until I saw it.

[972] You know what I mean?

[973] Yeah.

[974] And it's hard to get out of your head, but who are you to, like, other people are looking at it because they want to see it.

[975] It's fucked up.

[976] Yeah.

[977] that's amazing that was crazy we finally did that one finally thank you no thank you can i tell you i forgot about this i was uh we we moved in this new place this weekend and it was first day we moved in i was walking down this like the staircase and this like girl with a really cute dog walked up and she was this like cool girl like not cool you know she was like someone i would have drinks with a cool girl and i could have sworn when we walked by each other she's whispered stay sexy.

[978] I am serious.

[979] I think she whispered stay sexy.

[980] That's creepy.

[981] Which is so creepy.

[982] But I think I'm also, I think I'm also really paranoid.

[983] No, I know I'm also really paranoid.

[984] You're definitely really paranoid.

[985] But it sounded like she said something like that.

[986] I mean, I guess you'll find out.

[987] So I'm going to die.

[988] Do you have a positive thing?

[989] That's what I thought you were doing.

[990] What?

[991] turned into that.

[992] I thought you were doing a positive thing when you started that story.

[993] No, that's not positive.

[994] No, it's not.

[995] I realize now.

[996] It was just like a twist -a -roo at the end.

[997] My real positive thing, so I'm in this new apartment, a new apartment complex, and there's this thing that happened yesterday, and it puts two of my favorite words together as one.

[998] And so my positive thing is jacuzzi cat.

[999] Uh -huh.

[1000] There's a fucking.

[1001] giant black cat and Vince around the jacuzzi this fucking giant black cat strolls over to the side of the jacuzzi and like I thought I was in fucking narnia like let me pet him with my wet hand like I just was petting him and then he had a collar on I looked at the collar his name was fucking gus while you're sitting in I got in the jacuzzi and was about to cry because how happy I am that I get to be in a jacuzzi like this is my dream I can't believe this and then this cat just fucking saunter's on up named Gus.

[1002] Like, that's a fucking fake.

[1003] And he was like, I think he was an alien.

[1004] Like, he was kind of like watching the perimeter, but like letting me, like only me, pat him, like a wet hand.

[1005] That's hilarious.

[1006] It was like, it was a dream.

[1007] It was amazing.

[1008] That's good news.

[1009] Yeah.

[1010] About your future jacuzzi experiences.

[1011] Chacuzzi cat.

[1012] What if it's a different one next time?

[1013] Annabelle comes up.

[1014] She's all white.

[1015] Oh, my God.

[1016] With one green eye and one blue eye.

[1017] Dude.

[1018] Stephen and I were just talking about how there's a fucking cat at the fucking cat shelter.

[1019] Named cappuccino.

[1020] Who's white with one green eye and one fucking blue eye.

[1021] Whoa.

[1022] Named cappuccino?

[1023] No. Yes.

[1024] But it's still a white cat with a blue eye and a green eye.

[1025] Fucking Matrix, man. I don't care what my therapist says about detachment fucking issues.

[1026] Yeah.

[1027] This is the Matrix.

[1028] Yeah, yeah.

[1029] I got to tap in.

[1030] You just got to tap in.

[1031] What's yours?

[1032] Well, I guess I would say it was going to see the Golden Girls Live, which I had to go, I went and did Jamie Lee's podcast.

[1033] So I was downtown.

[1034] It was kind of far away, and I bought this ticket.

[1035] And when I went to buy the ticket for Golden Girls Live, you usually can roll up and buy as many tickets as you want.

[1036] It's like one of the scrolly things.

[1037] And I could only roll up to one.

[1038] so I was like oh whatever I'll just if I can only have one I'll have one so I bought that ticket so it turns out I bought the last ticket the guy told me because he was like you're not on this list and he like checked it a ton of times and then he went on to the website to get their list and then he goes he watched one girl's name disappear and my name took her place and he goes you literally bought the last ticket I'm like matrix so I had to sit in a chair in the aisle he both he goes here you can sit right here and so like you're like you can sit right here and so like you're like you can't you can sit right here and so like Like everyone else is kind of, you know, how it is in that room.

[1039] It's, like, raised up.

[1040] And I was like, someone's weird handicapped grandma where I was just in a chair in the aisle, like, I'll just sit here.

[1041] Yeah, exactly.

[1042] So the show starts, the lights go down, and they put up the opening screen of the Golden Girls.

[1043] And then the theme song starts, and everybody starts singing the theme song.

[1044] No, everyone starts singing the theme song together.

[1045] And it was, everyone was, like, laughing and smiling.

[1046] It was like a very beautiful, like, bonding moment in this weird way where it was just really nice.

[1047] And it was, you know, it's like 80 people or something.

[1048] I would please bring me next time.

[1049] I would love to go.

[1050] Yeah, we should totally go.

[1051] It would be so fun.

[1052] But it was just like a lovely, first of all, I like a group sing.

[1053] It's always very, like, cathartic.

[1054] But then everyone knows every word to the theme song to the Golden Girls.

[1055] And, like, some people were really belting it out.

[1056] And it brings you back to like a moment in time.

[1057] Like, you know, I stayed at home.

[1058] I was a kid and I watched that with my family Friday night That's what you did That was that was That's what was going on with everybody with that whole It was really lovely They have a mug I follow Jackie Beat on Instagram Oh I bought one of those mugs Does it say thank you for being a cunt It's all those guys dressed up as the golden girls Thank you for being a cunt It's genius Like I can't even handle how fucking amazing that is Yeah it's super good So you know That's a great moment So what a great caper.

[1059] That's our episode.

[1060] Thanks for listening.

[1061] You know, Twitter, Facebook, places, merch, Instagram, feelings.

[1062] Here we go.

[1063] Buy tickets.

[1064] If you're in a city where it is not sold out, we'd love to see you check what those cities are on the Facebook page.

[1065] And stay sexy.

[1066] And don't get murdered.

[1067] Elvis?

[1068] Want a cookie?

[1069] You want cookie?

[1070] Okay, bye Bye