178 - Live at the Folketeatret in Oslo

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] What's up, Oslo?

[2] The shit.

[3] That's true.

[4] Our luggage almost did it.

[5] That's okay.

[6] We've been up since 3 .30 this morning.

[7] Traveling.

[8] So it's going to be an experimental show.

[9] It's going to be fun.

[10] It's going to be stuff's going to come out.

[11] It's going to get a little weird.

[12] My pants are.

[13] up real high.

[14] Norway, I'm wearing pajamas.

[15] I'm wearing pajamas.

[16] I've never been here before.

[17] I've never been here before.

[18] You've never been here before?

[19] You've never been in the headspace before.

[20] I've never, oh, I've been in pajama headspace so many times.

[21] But to visit Norway for the first time and show up in this shit is not the coolest.

[22] Not the ideal, but thank you.

[23] Yeah, but it's be a show like no other.

[24] Right.

[25] Don't quote me on that.

[26] Steven, cut that.

[27] Cut that from their brains, so they don't remember that.

[28] They're like, we were promised to show like no other.

[29] Yeah, and it kind of sounded just like every other fucking launch show.

[30] It was like every other podcast I've ever heard.

[31] Seriously.

[32] But they were wearing pajamas.

[33] We did, so we had a show in Dublin last night, and then we get back to the hotel, like midnight, and then it's like, okay, you're going to have to meet in the Aviate, what was it?

[34] Three fucking 30 in the morning.

[35] Excuse me. And so we slept for an hour or two, right?

[36] Here and there.

[37] Yep.

[38] And then got on a plane.

[39] I drank coffee.

[40] That was fucking stupid because then I was just like wired for sound the whole time.

[41] We also had our layover in Amsterdam.

[42] So it wasn't like a direct, it wasn't like, oh, you're super tired, but you'll get there and you'll get to the hotel and then you'll relax.

[43] We're not complaining.

[44] You just want you to know what our journey.

[45] You need to know our journey.

[46] so you understand why my hair is wet right now.

[47] It's wet.

[48] We don't.

[49] Don't encourage her.

[50] Do not encourage that because I'll start rolling out here in a bed.

[51] I absolutely.

[52] Just wrapped in a fucking comforter.

[53] Nothing else.

[54] Well, I was, so anyway, we get, when we finally got here, it was like, okay, so we now have, what, three hours to basically take a nap, get back up.

[55] Finish our murders.

[56] Do our homework.

[57] Get dressed.

[58] I wish there was video on us of us all standing at the conveyor belts of the luggage, Vince Karen and I, just standing there watching as it slow.

[59] The bags were coming out.

[60] The bags were coming out.

[61] And we were all just like bleary -eyed and tired.

[62] And Vince goes, I feel a lot better if at least one of our bags would come out right now.

[63] Not one.

[64] I was like, oh, shit.

[65] Not a single one.

[66] And there's four of them.

[67] Do we have video?

[68] Oh.

[69] You look back.

[70] Here's what's fun.

[71] I took a surprise video of you, Georgia.

[72] Throw it up there.

[73] And then it was that dawning thing of it.

[74] Of course it didn't make it.

[75] And then I was like, I gotta wear this shit.

[76] I was so happy for a moment.

[77] I can wear the clothes I've been wearing for 40 hours.

[78] Dude, I need to burn my fucking travel clothes.

[79] Like, legit.

[80] Now I feel so guilty because my mother used to give me so much shit when I would go to, when I would travel, and she would see me dress like this.

[81] And you go, you're not going to wear that on the plane, are you?

[82] She would always say that.

[83] And I'm like, mom, nobody wears pillbox hats anymore.

[84] Like, that era is over.

[85] That dress up for the plane, dress up for the dentist.

[86] It's, it's over.

[87] We're not doing that anymore.

[88] Did she know how fucking awful air flight was at that point?

[89] I don't know.

[90] I don't know what she was saying.

[91] I think she just wanted to make sure I represented the Kilgaris correctly internationally.

[92] Passports would be like, oh, your Pat's daughter.

[93] Oh, oh.

[94] I better call all of her friends behind her back and tell her the things you've been wearing on.

[95] I mean, these wouldn't be the shoes.

[96] Even if I was going to do pajamas, I wouldn't have worn these shoes.

[97] Sure, sure, sure.

[98] Also, sorry, the blowdry I brought here works in America.

[99] And I don't know what the fuck.

[100] Your two -prong, weird shit is.

[101] I'm sick of it.

[102] She's not blaming you.

[103] It's just a weird coincidence.

[104] It's just this here that needs to be trained before we walk out into a large theater.

[105] It's important.

[106] Do you want to know my priorities?

[107] This is what I'm like.

[108] Get here.

[109] Fucking exhausted.

[110] Need to finish my murder.

[111] Blah, blah, blah.

[112] Still found time to go to a fucking pharmacy to buy some shit I can't buy in the U .S. What you get?

[113] Do they sell cocaine here?

[114] Yes.

[115] I got like a, I have this like list.

[116] I put an Instagram, photo up, and I was like, this is what I got to get, because you guys have, like, the harsh shit, you know, here.

[117] And I'm like, I put it on my fucking face, even though it's illegal where I live.

[118] I need it.

[119] Burn it off.

[120] Nothing is working.

[121] So I made a list, and I was like, what are you, what are you by when you're out of the States or whatever?

[122] And there was a list of 300 comments.

[123] I fucking went through every single one and screen grab the ones that tell me. And then I fucking went back in, and I fucking, like, it's, there's something going on in my head.

[124] It's my mom saying, you're going to look like that.

[125] Oh, no. So I went in and I bought some shit.

[126] Well, what I love is that in the airport, in Amsterdam, you came, I of course made a break for Starbucks immediately.

[127] I was like, buy, don't know, you don't care.

[128] Went to get.

[129] She did the nicest thing of, are you cool if I get?

[130] And I'm like, get the fuck out of here.

[131] I'm fucking shopping.

[132] Every man for himself.

[133] And I, uh, because I've been drinking so much tea over the couple days, but I hadn't had a nice really burnt cup of Starbucks coffee in so long.

[134] So I went to get that, and then we back up at the gate, and Georgia just walks up and throws me a tub of like salve, and I look at it, and it's like for nappy rash or whatever.

[135] I'm like, pseudo -cream.

[136] What are we putting on our face?

[137] You guys know pseudo -cream?

[138] Fuck yeah.

[139] We look over, and it's the oldest woman in the world.

[140] I love it.

[141] It works great.

[142] She's just dumping a tub of it on her head.

[143] Hurry, fix me. Hell yeah, that's what everyone's getting when I come back from his fucking big tub of nappy cream.

[144] And now, what's that nappy cream going to do for me?

[145] I mean, what can it not do?

[146] What does it do?

[147] I don't know.

[148] It's the best.

[149] It's just the best and be quiet about it?

[150] I don't even know yet.

[151] Okay.

[152] Acne.

[153] It'll give you acne.

[154] Okay, great.

[155] That's, then you're down to earth and people can approach you because you have acne.

[156] Because, you know, like, people are scared to talk to us because we're so fucking.

[157] Oh my God.

[158] Because our skin is so clear.

[159] Don't do that.

[160] Do not pander back to our pandering to you.

[161] Keep doing it.

[162] Keep doing it.

[163] We need this right now.

[164] Please, we need it.

[165] You're encouraging it.

[166] One more more.

[167] Acne.

[168] I don't know.

[169] It's other shit.

[170] What do you have?

[171] Put it on there.

[172] Adult onset acne.

[173] Yeah.

[174] Any kind of rash?

[175] You lips.

[176] You know, because they don't make anything else for that.

[177] Yes, I want to put nappy cream where chival.

[178] Capstick goes.

[179] That's exactly what I want.

[180] It's the thing of like, you know, all the ladies, like a year ago, we were like, coconut oil everywhere.

[181] Now it's nappy cream everywhere.

[182] It's the new thing.

[183] It could be a prank.

[184] Oh, shit.

[185] I didn't think about that.

[186] This could be some kind of a YouTube prank that some 20 -year -old boys are pulling on us.

[187] We're like, look at him, wipe that shit all over their fate.

[188] No, but beauty bloggers told me. It was beauty bloggers.

[189] If you can't trust a beauty blogger, I don't know how that ends.

[190] They're like, we don't have those here.

[191] Everything I say, just imagine everyone, the audience is like, we don't have that here.

[192] McDonald's?

[193] No, we don't have that here.

[194] I want to apologize to you that my breath smells like blue cheese that I ate backstage.

[195] even though I had just brushed my teeth and there's cheese so of course I'm like cheese fuck it was really good cheese you guys good job you do that well congratulations and my breath smells like a layover in Amsterdam oh by the way speaking of this is my favorite murder of the podcast oh yes Georgia hard start thank you we're in fucking Oslo we're in Oslo Norway I wanted to come here I mean obviously forever but then one of my favorite bands in like 2007 put a song out called Oslo in the summertime and I was like I want to go Montreal I want to go there okay that's how you should plan all your travels yeah holiday in Cambodia summertime in Austin that's right I holiday in Cambodia we've got to go to Cambodia should we wait okay because I need to tell Oslo a quick story okay because see we got here so we got here at three yeah went straight into our hotel rooms.

[196] We've been there the whole time.

[197] Yeah.

[198] So it's not like you can tell you fun, cool stuff we did, or like, can you believe this Osloian said this to us?

[199] I can talk about the pharmacy.

[200] Oh, you can?

[201] That's it.

[202] Okay.

[203] No, no, no, go ahead.

[204] Oh, whoa.

[205] I just want to say, I don't want to lie.

[206] I was in, I did leave the hotel room once.

[207] Oh, okay.

[208] Yeah.

[209] Did you get more Nappy cream?

[210] I got, I don't even know with this fucking point.

[211] I was just like, that's a name I saw.

[212] That's a name I saw.

[213] That's a name I saw.

[214] We were only on this tour for three days.

[215] I cannot shut my suitcase.

[216] I know.

[217] How are you going to fit any of this?

[218] I took my carry -on suitcase, put it inside a huge suitcase, zip that motherfucker.

[219] Nice.

[220] Two suitcases.

[221] Because I know myself.

[222] There's one thing about me and said I know myself.

[223] Does that mean I also have two suitcases?

[224] No. Ah, ah, you said it in front of everybody.

[225] You have to be a teammate with me. Well, I was going to put all our things that we get, the treats and stuff, Australia, we got 400 boxes of Tim Tams.

[226] Because I fucking stupidly said it on the podcast.

[227] It's like, bring me all the cookies, which is true.

[228] Bring me all the fucking cookies.

[229] But then they actually did.

[230] But then they did a night.

[231] We had to bring them home.

[232] And we bought the suitcase.

[233] I'm tired.

[234] Go on.

[235] No, no. So you can't lean over.

[236] Go on.

[237] This is the stage.

[238] The stage.

[239] Oh, you were telling a story and I interrupted.

[240] No, no, no. Because it's just, this is basically the only story I have to tell the people of Oslo.

[241] But I'm excited about it.

[242] because one of the most irritating people I've ever known was my college roommate and Kristen, and she was...

[243] Naming names.

[244] They might know her.

[245] She's here with a single tear rolling down, aren't she?

[246] A nappy cream all over her face.

[247] God, she looks like she's 12.

[248] She was so obsessed with Norway.

[249] She talked about it all the time.

[250] We lived in Sacramento, California, which is essentially a floodplain.

[251] with a sun lamp directly over the top of it.

[252] It's the worst city in the world.

[253] And I guess Kristen came here on a summer break one time and when she came back.

[254] Okay, so she talked like this for real.

[255] We've gotten accused of vocal fry.

[256] This is what they, girls from California talk like this.

[257] Ah, for sure.

[258] But my roommate Kristen really did talk like that.

[259] So it took her forever to say anything.

[260] She'd be like, you guys.

[261] Norway is amazing.

[262] How come she sounds like a little old lady?

[263] She was lazy?

[264] I don't know.

[265] So she would just, she would talk about Norway all the time and she learned to make a kind of sandwich here that she'd be like, you have to try this sandwich.

[266] And so anytime my other roommate, there was like six of us that lived in one apartment or whatever, but we all ended up, she drove us insane.

[267] And so anytime we want to talk shit about her, We didn't say anything specific.

[268] We'd just say, Norway is amazing.

[269] That was the...

[270] I love it.

[271] That was the cue line of, like, meet me in the other room so I can tell you what fucked up shit.

[272] She just did.

[273] I am going out of my fucking head.

[274] Do you know how amazing Norway is?

[275] Come with me. I'm going to tell you about it.

[276] I'll make you a sandwich.

[277] Oh, no. Norway got thrown under the bus.

[278] So I've been hearing about you guys for so long, and I hear that you're amazing.

[279] but for a Kristen in your face Karen when we were on the fucking plane over here we're just sitting there like normal people in this like lovely stewardess hands us the cutest package like do you want a sandwich and like that's my that's the only question I ever want to be asked my fucking life like if Vince had proposed to me by saying do you want a sandwich forever and be like yes you bite into the sandwich the rings inside that's a good idea actually that is a great idea uh that's a great idea that's a great idea You said good, and I was like, no. No. They hand us the, it was just cheese on bread, but it made my fucking day.

[280] So it's, she wasn't wrong.

[281] No, you know what?

[282] Let's bring her out here.

[283] Let's bring her out here, Kristen.

[284] She's everybody's cousin.

[285] They were a really good sandwiches.

[286] What were they?

[287] Oh.

[288] It was, oh, the one she made.

[289] It was brown bread.

[290] I think she put like red peppers and some weird shit on it.

[291] I was always walking away from her.

[292] She drove me. insane.

[293] You knew the first two ingredients and then you were like, goodbye.

[294] You've got to go.

[295] You're taking too long to express yourself.

[296] I need it to be snappy.

[297] And also, she ever said was that it was amazing.

[298] Amazing.

[299] I think she went to a festival in the summer.

[300] Amazing.

[301] And it was amazing.

[302] Cool.

[303] Okay, now we sit down?

[304] Okay, let's sit down.

[305] Okay.

[306] Look at those.

[307] Thank you.

[308] Oh, these are really these are weird chairs, man. It's perfect for our vibe right now.

[309] It fits right in.

[310] It fits in the vibe.

[311] I have to say it's much easier to get up on this chair, not in my insane dress and high heels and spanks.

[312] It's easier to do everything.

[313] Right?

[314] I just realized this is a very special.

[315] It's really not.

[316] This is the first time I've worn pants on stage for a live show.

[317] Ever?

[318] Ever?

[319] And not worn a dress.

[320] And I feel like myself for the first time in my fucking walk.

[321] You need to take a walk.

[322] I think you need to take a walk -up process.

[323] And I can.

[324] Walk it up.

[325] Freedom.

[326] The freedom.

[327] Cameltoe.

[328] But otherwise, shit's great.

[329] That only adds.

[330] Sex sells, baby.

[331] That's, oh, don't you guys know?

[332] In the U .S., that's the new accessories.

[333] Extreme camel toe.

[334] Medically dangerous camel toe.

[335] I'll show you this.

[336] Show us.

[337] Yes, I am wearing pajamas.

[338] Thank you.

[339] No, it's okay.

[340] My pajamas have pockets.

[341] That's right.

[342] Thank you so much.

[343] I bought them at the gap.

[344] I mean, look.

[345] I mean, listen.

[346] Look and listen about my 2001 Georgia hair, what are these called?

[347] When you pull your hair, wisps.

[348] Some wisps on the side.

[349] Is this still in?

[350] Was it ever?

[351] Listen.

[352] Look and listen.

[353] We've told you.

[354] We've told you many times.

[355] Oh, Stephen's not here, even though I've been screaming at him.

[356] Oh, that's where you go, oh, and then he feels good about when he listens.

[357] later.

[358] They're like, we actually don't care.

[359] Norway's the one place, Stephen, I hate you.

[360] What does you do?

[361] We just don't feel here in Norway but we don't feel an affinity towards Stephen at all.

[362] There's nothing that draws us to him.

[363] We've seen mustaches.

[364] What'd she say?

[365] I don't know, but she's pissed.

[366] Some girl over there, it's like, yes, I don't!

[367] How dare you?

[368] He's amazing.

[369] My cats think so too.

[370] Yeah, that's right.

[371] Oh, he's sending me so many photos of the cats.

[372] It's like, how is he so good at feline photography?

[373] He might need to go into cat portraiture after this podcast.

[374] And I feel like he could make a fucking killing on pet sitting now because everyone in the comments whenever he posts about the cats is, come to wherever and watch my cats.

[375] You're the best cat uncle, you know?

[376] So like...

[377] Steven, if you can hear me right now, please don't aim to be a cat uncle.

[378] That's the most upsetting phrase I've ever heard.

[379] for a young man. Cat people understand now.

[380] But a cat, it's like being a cat person is one thing.

[381] A cat uncle?

[382] Well, he's their uncle.

[383] He's kind of touching the cat weird over in the corner.

[384] Oh, no. Stop it.

[385] Karen has not had good experiences with uncles.

[386] I'm so tired.

[387] I'm just doing cheap comedy.

[388] What else is there?

[389] My coffee's gone.

[390] Oh, no. Keep drinking it.

[391] Keep drinking it forever.

[392] Do do do, do.

[393] Okay.

[394] Fuck, man. Uh -oh.

[395] It's going to be fun is we're going to fucking get wired on caffeine and then not be able to sleep tonight.

[396] That's really fun and this is the thing that we do and we text each other at three in the morning like, I can't sleep, can you sleep?

[397] No. And then we just like back and forth I'm like, I can't believe this is our lives.

[398] This is so crazy.

[399] Life is so crazy.

[400] And then GIF, GIF, GIF.

[401] Did you see this thing?

[402] There's a thing about turtles on Channel 9.

[403] Forensic Files is on.

[404] And that's it.

[405] That's our lie.

[406] That's our lie.

[407] It's, you know what's gross to be sweating with wet hair.

[408] It's not a, it's like, not a good combination.

[409] That is the worst feeling.

[410] To forget the thing where like, you look fine and then you lift your bangs and it's like wet bangs?

[411] Yeah, and I also have the thing where like, as a, as a, the palest type of person, my scalp just wants to burst through my hair at any given moment.

[412] So it always is like, is her hair wet?

[413] Is it greasy?

[414] Is she balding?

[415] What's, why is it not good up there?

[416] So like, as we were standing backstage and there, are like, you have about three minutes, and I was just like, okay, I'll just keep brushing my hair over and over and pretend that's drying my hair.

[417] Oh, God, no, I get it.

[418] That's why my hair's in a fucking ponytail right now.

[419] Um, look, listen.

[420] Why can't we stop saying that?

[421] We, this is the most time we've said that live.

[422] What?

[423] What?

[424] I don't know.

[425] Um, look, I think we're going to do a great show.

[426] I think so, too.

[427] I think we have.

[428] We can meet a minute.

[429] Give us a minute.

[430] I think we have.

[431] Oh, thank you.

[432] If we can just, if you don't mind, uh, us taking a private moment after you've paid and waited to come and see this and we'll just have a conversation of ourselves.

[433] What I think is great is really anything's possible now because we're not bound by the strictures of society.

[434] I don't know what I'm saying.

[435] You know, we're free.

[436] Space time continuum doesn't exist in Norway, right?

[437] You don't have it here.

[438] You guys don't, you guys are granted immunity from we've time hopped over here.

[439] Yep.

[440] And now we are in a, we're all in a space together and we're about to discover what it's like to talk about true crime in a comedic way.

[441] By the way, if you came here with a person who loves this podcast and you've never heard it before.

[442] And you're kind of a grump in general.

[443] Like people would describe you as a grump.

[444] If you cross your arms a lot, your first reaction is always, I don't think so.

[445] We're going to need you to get the fuck out because this is a very...

[446] Yeah.

[447] The back half of the room leaves.

[448] Wait, we didn't mean it.

[449] No, no, no, we'll win you over.

[450] My pajamas.

[451] I went first last night.

[452] So I go first.

[453] Tonight.

[454] Is that cool?

[455] You good?

[456] Yes, I think it'll be good.

[457] Okay, great.

[458] So we always talk about how, when we go to other countries, even states in the U .S. to tour, it's so fucking weird because you're like, what murder should I do?

[459] And then just insane murder that everyone there knows, and it's like their murder, and you've never fucking heard of it.

[460] it's really kind of awesome.

[461] And so you guys have one that I hadn't heard of, and then I looked into it, and I was like, how are we all not talking about this everywhere?

[462] Love it.

[463] What a great start.

[464] This is the Isdahl Woman.

[465] You guys.

[466] That's rad.

[467] You've been holding back on us.

[468] Can I just say, and God bless Dublin, we had two awesome shows, amazing kickoff in Dublin, but both nights, both times I was like, and now I'm going to do it.

[469] Billy in the bowl and that's what it sounded like nothing not even laughing just and then one girl yeah just happy for her she felt bad she felt bad that was that was a cousin of mine she felt bad for me and she's like we are all proud of you Karen so I love it yeah so once I started looking into this I was like well fuck that what's the one guy's name that I did before who found you know that guy nope you know Okay.

[470] It has, I'll remember it.

[471] Was he on this door?

[472] Nope.

[473] Oh.

[474] You're saying in the hundreds of episodes we've done.

[475] One of the guys I did.

[476] Oh.

[477] Oh, it was the something man. Somerset man. No one yelled it and I'm pointing out in the audience.

[478] Oh, the Australian guy?

[479] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[480] It's got whispers of this.

[481] Okay.

[482] When I went to look to study this, there is currently a podcast going on that's like we're going to fucking solve this.

[483] reckon case.

[484] It's good.

[485] It's a Norwegian journalist.

[486] Oh, here's what we need to do real quick.

[487] This is important, actually.

[488] I forgot this.

[489] This is key.

[490] You two from Norway?

[491] No, great.

[492] You are.

[493] Okay, you too.

[494] Right here?

[495] You're our translators.

[496] Okay.

[497] And so everyone's going to want to scream at us when we get every word wrong.

[498] And it's going to be a lot.

[499] Like, you guys got to give us a little room for this one.

[500] Let's not anticipate something negative.

[501] Okay.

[502] We'll anticipate the positive, but then if something bad happens, what's your name?

[503] Cecilia?

[504] Cecilia.

[505] Wait, are you Norwegian?

[506] That sounded like an Irish accent to me. Uh -oh, Karen suspect.

[507] Uh -oh.

[508] Oh, this whole thing just turned.

[509] Cecilia, you're the one that's going to say the name properly after we say it wrong.

[510] Were you lying?

[511] Can you do it?

[512] Can you do it?

[513] Okay.

[514] Are you on some kind of a hallucinogenic drug right now that might impede?

[515] your ability.

[516] We'll make it better.

[517] Just a tiny bit.

[518] A tiny bit's fine.

[519] Yeah, that's fine.

[520] We all are.

[521] We've been pumping it into the theater.

[522] Oh, and also, if we say something that is factually incorrect and everyone in the room knows it and feels uncomfortable for us, please just put your hand out.

[523] We'll call on you, Cecilia, and then we'll go to you for facts.

[524] But we have nothing but positive.

[525] We have nothing but we think we're going to be.

[526] Love for you, baby.

[527] Yeah.

[528] Okay.

[529] Norwegian Journal.

[530] Merritt Higraf.

[531] That's, yeah.

[532] It's your name, Cecilia.

[533] Anyone named Cecilia here can do it.

[534] You're opening it up to the Cecilia's of the room?

[535] What if everyone in here is named Cecilia?

[536] You don't know?

[537] I don't know.

[538] And documentary maker Neil McCarthy, they're doing a podcast about this called Death and Ice Valley, and they want to, like, do the DNA testing and all the crazy stuff.

[539] So it's cool.

[540] But it's a great story.

[541] I mean, it's a fucking tragic, sad, great story.

[542] They know.

[543] which is what the podcast is called.

[544] It's a tragic, sad, great, tragic story.

[545] So the story of the Isdahl Woman, it's been one of Norway's biggest mysteries for almost 50 years.

[546] In the morning of November 29th, 1970, let's all go there, a professor and his two daughters, age 10 and 12.

[547] We're going for a morning hike in a remote spot in the Isdalen Valley, Bergen, Norway.

[548] I got it.

[549] I think I fucking got it.

[550] Nope.

[551] We can't see her face.

[552] We can't see her face.

[553] We can't see the subtleties of her expression.

[554] Then I'm going to assume I got it.

[555] The valley is known to locals as Death Valley because there's so many suicides happen there and because people will die there.

[556] Okay.

[557] Just trust.

[558] Trust.

[559] Death Valley.

[560] Okay.

[561] We have one of those too.

[562] Yeah, yeah, but it's just really hot.

[563] Just hot.

[564] And in the 1960s, some hikers had also fallen to their deaths while trekking in the fog, which is like, oh, God, stay at heart.

[565] home, you know.

[566] This is what happens when you leave the fucking house.

[567] That's right.

[568] Just walk off cliffs.

[569] Don't you realize fog is waiting around every corner?

[570] That's right.

[571] Okay, so that morning, the two fucking daughters, 10 and 12, find.

[572] Hidden between some rocks, kind of like tucked in between some rocks, the girl stumbled upon the remains of a badly burnt body.

[573] The family runs back to town to call authorities.

[574] I guess it's like an hour, though, I think.

[575] an hour trek to back to town.

[576] Did they run on foot?

[577] I don't know if they ran.

[578] I just put that word in.

[579] Okay.

[580] It's a good visual of a family running together.

[581] Yeah.

[582] Yeah.

[583] To solve a crime.

[584] That's right.

[585] They go back to town.

[586] They call authorities.

[587] The body is that of a woman, and she's lying on her back, and the front of her body is badly burnt, making her face unrecognizable.

[588] And the police lawyer, who's one of the first officers to be on the scene, Carl Havlor A -A -A -S?

[589] What's the?

[590] Oos.

[591] Oos.

[592] Not even, was that like a telephone, but it went just completely.

[593] Say it again?

[594] Oh, O's Ours.

[595] It's us.

[596] This show is going to last four and a half hours.

[597] FYI.

[598] FYI.

[599] How do you say that?

[600] Fee!

[601] Fee!

[602] He said it looked like she had, it was like she had thrown, it was like she had thrown herself back from a looked like that, but there was no, you know, there wasn't a fire going on.

[603] And she was also found out of the way.

[604] It was an, it was an unusual place to be.

[605] It wasn't like she had just been hiking.

[606] And also, side note, the little girls back in the 1970s who were that young, they still won't talk about it at all to anyone.

[607] They said that they, 40 years plus years later, it psychologically affected them so much that they're just keeping it within the family.

[608] I'm sure.

[609] Not talking about it.

[610] Well, also, I bet there's something, too, it where it's, like, I can't think of the correct word, but, like, that experience.

[611] Oh, it's os.

[612] Awesome.

[613] So, they don't just want to go on TV and be like, yeah, so anyway, it's not, that's not how it is for them.

[614] So, like, all the media that comes to interview people of, like, what happened?

[615] What did it feel like?

[616] Where it's like, they don't fucking know how it felt like they were 10 and 12.

[617] But it also, like, that does something to make the curiosity even bigger for the media.

[618] So they probably hound them more than they would if they were like, we're getting one fucking interview, and that's it, to, like, get Oprah over here immediately.

[619] Well, and also, because they're little, so it's, like, even more salacious.

[620] Totally.

[621] So the case becomes more mysterious by what was found at the scene.

[622] So weird.

[623] There's a dozen more pills are found, along with a pack lunch, an empty bottle of, and I found out what it was, St. Halvard's liquor, liqueur, giggling, don't fucking giggle.

[624] Two plastic bottles that smelled of petrol, a burnt passport.

[625] a broken umbrella, and a silver spoon with the monogram filed off.

[626] What?

[627] That sounds like a board game, if I've ever heard it.

[628] Sorry.

[629] That's crazy.

[630] The body is surrounded also by jewelry, a watch, nylon stockings, and a burnt rubber boots.

[631] The labels of the bottles had been scraped off.

[632] The tags of the clothes have been cut off and, like, looking, like, obviously, to conceal her identity.

[633] And then when the press gets wind of her, the Jane Doe, they dub her the Is Doll Woman.

[634] because it's where she's found.

[635] The autopsy only added more mystery.

[636] Her cause of death was a combination of phenobarbital sleeping pills and carbon monoxide poisoning with smoke particles in her lungs.

[637] So you gotta hope she died of inhaling the smoke before the fire.

[638] You know?

[639] There were around 50 to 70 sleeping pills found on her stomach, which hadn't yet integrated into her bloodstream.

[640] That's a lot.

[641] So she probably wasn't passed out.

[642] when she was lit on fire.

[643] Sorry, yes.

[644] Let me ask the worst question that you can't answer.

[645] Yes, okay.

[646] The medical examiner also had a large bruise on her neck.

[647] It may be caused by a blunt force, and the woman's fingerprints have been deliberately sanded away.

[648] This is an expert, this person, that's doing all this.

[649] Yes.

[650] What they were able to tell about her, though, was that she had numerous gold fillings, and caps and the dental work at the time they thought was associated with the far east, central and south Europe or South America, indicating she wasn't a local.

[651] Which I think is so interesting, like back then that that's what they could do.

[652] Because people locally did not use that much gold in their fillings or whatever?

[653] Something.

[654] Yeah, it was like whatever material they was.

[655] Did someone just drop a tuning fork?

[656] Or is that our cue to get the fuck out of here?

[657] Yeah, you know what I mean?

[658] And they can tell by whatever dental procedures and whatever materials they use.

[659] Pretty cool.

[660] Anyways, after discovery of the body, police are like, let's trace this woman so we can find her fucking killers.

[661] The death was originally, and then the death, some people were like, it was a suicide.

[662] Which, like, you know, I don't think so.

[663] No. But, you know.

[664] I'm going to commit suicide.

[665] But first, let me cut all the tags out of my clothes and sand my fingerprints off.

[666] And then kill myself in possibly the most painful fucking way.

[667] Possibly.

[668] And especially when there's like, cliffs, go just jump.

[669] Okay, never mind.

[670] We won't suggest.

[671] No. Georgia told me. Okay.

[672] After discovery of the body, I already said that.

[673] Okay.

[674] The police get their first clue to learning the identity when three days after the body is found, two suitcases are found at the Bergen train station nearby.

[675] The thought plikins.

[676] Inside.

[677] Did you do that on purpose?

[678] I did, and I love it.

[679] I don't ever say it correctly anymore.

[680] Inside of the suitcases, and they were hers, were clothes, a variety of wigs, a comb, hairbrush, makeup, money from Germany and Norway, coins from Belgium, Switzerland, and the UK.

[681] One of the suitcases had 500 Deutsche marks hidden within the lining.

[682] Ooh.

[683] Ew.

[684] We've got a wig spy on our hands.

[685] Yeah.

[686] And don't forget, it's 1970s, so it's the fucking Cold War.

[687] Oh, right?

[688] Is it?

[689] I think so.

[690] Yes.

[691] No one laughed, so.

[692] They're very polite people.

[693] They don't, yeah, they put up with a lot of stupidity.

[694] On this specific podcast.

[695] The clothing suggested that she had a more provocative style, and I think it was like Italian garments and everything looked fancy and shit, is what they're saying.

[696] All the clothing had been scrubbed of fingerprints and labels had been removed.

[697] A tube of eczema cream was also found.

[698] Its prescription label had been removed.

[699] Inside one of the suitcases was a pair of non -prescription glasses and it had a partial fingerprint on the lens, but it wasn't of any help.

[700] Or it belonged to her.

[701] I can't remember.

[702] I can't.

[703] It was hard to tell based on writing.

[704] They would know, right, if it belonged to her.

[705] How would they be able to tell?

[706] Duh.

[707] That's, there you go.

[708] It's so much easier when someone's telling you a story to hear that stuff than when you're the one doing it, where it's just like, what do you mean?

[709] Oh, that's obvious.

[710] I didn't, and I had just said that.

[711] there was another item found in one of the suitcases that stood out.

[712] It was a legal pad, and it was written in code, written in code, various letters and numbers.

[713] They cracked the code, and it corresponded with the woman stays in different cities.

[714] So she's tracking where she's going.

[715] But writing in a code.

[716] And with wigs.

[717] Well, I do that, too.

[718] You love your wigs.

[719] And I'm an international spy.

[720] Oh, shit.

[721] What if this was my cover?

[722] That's our TV show.

[723] Steven!

[724] Podcast spies.

[725] Podcasting spies.

[726] And we just spy on other people who do good research on their podcasts.

[727] And we kill them so that we're the only ones.

[728] No, that's mine.

[729] The spy who podcasts.

[730] Yes, we've done it.

[731] That's the title for now.

[732] Wait.

[733] You got it.

[734] Okay.

[735] Legal pad.

[736] Code.

[737] The codes couldn't be cracked.

[738] They were cracked.

[739] And it was where she was saying.

[740] She also had multiple passports and registered at different hotels under different identities.

[741] So clearly, she's a fucking spy, right?

[742] You don't put money in the lining of your suitcase if you're not, if you're just messing around for fun.

[743] No. Also, you'd forget it was there.

[744] I would absolutely be like, I could have sworn I took $300 out of the bank.

[745] Now, which suitcase did I put that in?

[746] Did I sew it into the lining of?

[747] Okay, then they find a plastic bag in advertising a shoe store.

[748] in Stavanger I can tell I'm not right because you're laughing at me. Help us.

[749] What?

[750] Stavonier.

[751] Stavangette.

[752] Thank you.

[753] Stavanngette.

[754] Stavanngette.

[755] Yet.

[756] Yet.

[757] Stavannette.

[758] We're not making fun.

[759] I swear to God.

[760] We have no idea what's going on.

[761] All I need to do is get it once.

[762] That's right.

[763] I need to get it seven times, and it's not my story.

[764] And you need me to repeat it, even though I'm not going to get it right again.

[765] So in Stavanger.

[766] Thank you, Cecilia.

[767] Stavanger is so amazing.

[768] I knew that would pay off one day.

[769] I knew suffering through living with her would pay off one day.

[770] The Sends owner, Rolf, remembers selling a pair of rubber boots to a very well -dry.

[771] Nice looking woman with dark hair And she came into the store Trying to decide which rubber boots and umbrella To buy.

[772] You think she'd be a little more like I'm getting that and that So he wouldn't remember her but also she was hot What's up?

[773] Well Because there is this television show I'm not sure if you guys Have gotten it over here yet because it's American And it's new.

[774] It's called Good Behavior And it's with right It's with the woman from Downton Abbey Lady Mary And she is like a con artist in America And it's the best show But B, her whole thing is, first of all, she's all about those wigs.

[775] She's got, like, 25 wigs.

[776] But also, she does exactly the opposite, where she goes in and kind of dazzles people.

[777] And so she's, like, makes friends with everybody and does a character.

[778] And then they remember her, but as a different person.

[779] So she's like...

[780] The details are all...

[781] Everyone has a different detail, and it's too many.

[782] She has, like, a southern accent and a little blonde bob.

[783] And then when she's walking back through with long black hair, nobody notices her.

[784] Except everyone in real life is like, that's a fucking wig.

[785] Like, ever, you can tell.

[786] No, you can, I'm kidding.

[787] It's true because wigs, the top of it is just a tiny bit higher than a normal scalp is.

[788] Just a tiny bit higher.

[789] Quite dense.

[790] Not like my hair.

[791] No one would ever guess that we're wearing wigs, is what I'm saying.

[792] I wore a wet wig out here for you guys.

[793] Oh, she picked her wet wig tonight.

[794] That's nice.

[795] That's so 80s.

[796] Okay.

[797] Then, so she, he helps her, he recalled she was, calm seemed to be from another country and that she smelled and I feel like this is just describes me a strong scent possibly garlic so she just had Italian lunch which I had today too and I like picked the garlic out and ate it seriously or what are she some kind of garlics perfume oh and like she wanted him to like get pay attention to that and not you know that she like that she had her name tattooed on her forehead or whatever don't look at this yeah uh of course According to multiple witnesses who saw her or met her, she seemed, because they, like, followed her trail, she seemed well -traveled, confident, fashionable, elegant, and spoke several languages, including English, Dutch, French, German, etc. Oh, this website's fired.

[798] And then just, it's the rest of all the languages that everyone speaks in the world.

[799] Pick one.

[800] Although, and she did speak poor English and German, but her fluency in European languages made her, they seemed that she was European.

[801] I mean, just follow the trail.

[802] Okay.

[803] With the release, they released a composite sketch throughout the world, hoping someone to recognize her, describe her as 25 to 40, 5 -4, long, black or brown hair, small, round face, brown eyes, small ears, and that she wore her hair tied back with a blue and white ribbon.

[804] So, God, I just keep hitting myself in the face with this microphone.

[805] So I just want to acknowledge in case you're seeing this, I know.

[806] Consumit professional.

[807] I also keep hitting the table.

[808] Do this.

[809] Please help me. It's just like it was in a loop.

[810] Yeah, I could do that.

[811] Isn't that funny?

[812] Stop it.

[813] Just do like...

[814] No, no. Perfect.

[815] Okay, sorry.

[816] Focus.

[817] They track her movements to Norway that show that she was saying in three different hotels in March of 1970 and her two different false names, which is like, I can't keep track of my own fucking name.

[818] Oh.

[819] Seven months later, after being out of the country, apparently, she returns, and in the span of a month, stays at another six hotels with six more false identities, and that she was known to request rooms with balconies and would change rooms often, which I think is, like, not conspicuous.

[820] I don't like this room.

[821] Give me another one.

[822] It's kind of a diva move, too.

[823] Just be like, I'm sorry, this room isn't good enough.

[824] Can you give me the exact same room, three doors down?

[825] Yeah.

[826] Because they're all exactly the same.

[827] Yeah.

[828] Or someone is hunting me, and I need to keep changing rooms over and over again.

[829] Ooh.

[830] That's what, I think that's what the point was.

[831] Okay.

[832] Maybe you should say the point at the top of the paragraph for me. Well, I think we're all going, okay, let's all go on.

[833] Let's imagine she's an international spy, and every weird thing she does is because she's an international spy.

[834] I didn't mean to be condescending.

[835] Yes.

[836] However, I, this, then I. Howmever.

[837] Howmever, from last night, you throwing me out of the best.

[838] So hard, you guys.

[839] I turned the Dublin audience on Georgia in a way that was kind of a podcastender.

[840] It was...

[841] I screamed, what the fuck, Karen?

[842] I didn't mean it.

[843] It just kind of weird.

[844] She told them I didn't fucking know that Ireland wasn't part of the UK.

[845] Which I absolutely do and never didn't.

[846] Before that day.

[847] That's not true.

[848] Steven.

[849] It'd make me go back to high school.

[850] I mean, elementary school.

[851] We all learned.

[852] Okay.

[853] Where was I?

[854] Being condescending.

[855] Changing hotel rooms.

[856] Changing hotel rooms.

[857] And at several places, she left a standing order that, like, every morning she wanted porridge with milk.

[858] I don't know why I like that so much.

[859] Maybe she's a bear.

[860] Just spills.

[861] We're spitballing ideas in a way we normally don't.

[862] Keep up, Cecilia.

[863] Come on.

[864] She signed hotel bills with the occupation of antique dealer.

[865] The last hotel she stayed in, she checked out, and then departed in a taxi, which she paid for in cash, six days before her body was discovered.

[866] And then they look through her luggage.

[867] They find a postcard belonging to an Italian photographer, and they're like, this is a clue, right?

[868] That had to be exciting.

[869] He had dined with her at a hotel in...

[870] Fuck.

[871] Loen?

[872] L -O -E -N.

[873] Lewin.

[874] She goes...

[875] I think that was pretty close.

[876] She just said it.

[877] She goes, What?

[878] Are we bothering you?

[879] Like, you want to do this, right?

[880] No, she's like, I just wanted to come and watch this.

[881] I don't, she doesn't even know this podcast, right?

[882] She's like, the mushrooms are just hitting right now.

[883] Hand them over.

[884] Okay.

[885] Lewin, Norway.

[886] but he could only remember a few details of their interaction, even though he had gone to, like, dinner with her and shit.

[887] Liar.

[888] He claimed to be from, he claimed that she, he said that she claimed to be from South Africa and had, quote, six months to see Norway's most beautiful places.

[889] In every wig in her suitcase.

[890] Her, the Isdall woman's remains are buried in February of 1971, and the authorities believe she might have a Catholic background, So they also, so the investigator officers all attended, and they took photographs of the funeral.

[891] She was buried with lilacs and tulips, and the priest called her, quote, the unknown woman who was put to the grave in a foreign country without any family present.

[892] So that was 1971.

[893] Decades fucking later in 2005, case goes cold, obviously.

[894] A Bergen native guy comes forward and he was like, oh, hey, I just saw the composite and I had this memory of 1970, which is like, really?

[895] He's like, I was 26.

[896] And five days before the discovery of the body, he was hiking with friends and he noticed a clearly foreign woman hiking up the path.

[897] They were coming back down.

[898] He said her clothing seemed to be unsuitable for hiking and looked like suited for a night in the city, which is like judgy, you know?

[899] What would you think about these outfits in this scenario?

[900] Suitable for an on -stage audience.

[901] Suitable for laying all the way down.

[902] And she appeared to be terrified of two, quote, Southern -looking men walking not far behind her, wearing black coats, like following her.

[903] As they passed her, she made eye contact and seemed distressed and tried to speak to him.

[904] And then continued walking.

[905] walking of the men, like, wouldn't let her and kept her words herself.

[906] And then upon recognizing her from the composite sketch, she calls the police, and they tell her, forget her, she was dispatched.

[907] The case will never be solved.

[908] So he's like, all right, I'll go back.

[909] I didn't tell you so long.

[910] Wait, did they say that to him in 2005 or back in the day?

[911] You know what?

[912] Sorry.

[913] Wait.

[914] I bet it was, you know what, though?

[915] I bet you're fucking right.

[916] I bet it was then.

[917] Do you Because how could you pass a person on a, on a trail that's giving you the old, uh -uh, as they pass, with two fucking dudes in black coats behind and just be like, well, that's hiking for you.

[918] God, the nature out here is nuts, the things that happen.

[919] Like, you would have to do something, right?

[920] I bet she's right.

[921] She shrugged, so she, yes.

[922] You have to make the call.

[923] You are a key piece of this show.

[924] Cecilia, you're breaking my heart.

[925] I'm screaming at her, so she picked.

[926] me. Okay, great.

[927] Okay, so the leading theory is that the Isidah woman was a spy who had been murdered, possibly connected to Russia and the Cold War.

[928] Okay.

[929] What's happening?

[930] So, da -da -da -da -da.

[931] Okay, the case was recently open in 2016, 46 years after the body was found, and they're hoping modern technology will identify her, and her jaw was found preserved because it had all of those weird feelings in, and they're like, this is...

[932] We're going to need this.

[933] And in 2016, a DNA profile was obtained.

[934] And handwriting analysis was done on the code, which I think is so fucking cool, suggesting a European, possibly French origin.

[935] And in 2017, isotopic analysis of her teeth revealed that she was probably spent her early childhood in central or eastern Europe, but spent her adolescence farther west.

[936] So that's fucking interesting.

[937] God, from teeth?

[938] I know, is that cool?

[939] What are they going to say about my teeth?

[940] I mean, it would make you feel good to see if these teeth were, these were some teeth.

[941] They were, as David Sedera's French dentist says, they're good time teeth.

[942] I've broken a bottle, I broken each front tooth on a bottle because I've lived my life.

[943] What?

[944] Did you hear that noise?

[945] They just made it me?

[946] Oh, no. You should try partying hard that, so hard that sometimes.

[947] It's fun.

[948] And you're wearing pajamas?

[949] Oh, no. Oh, no. Is she okay?

[950] The researchers, okay, they think that she moved between childhood and adolescence, and they still don't know the age at the time of death, but some indications would suggest that she may have moved just before or during World War II, which is fucking cool.

[951] And they still hope to find, so they buried her in a zinc coffin back in 1971, specifically so that she wouldn't decompose because they're like someday someone will be able to fucking identify this woman.

[952] Who was the mayor?

[953] That's so genius.

[954] We finally get to tell a story of like the most brilliant police and authority is worth.

[955] That's so awesome.

[956] Yeah, good job Norway.

[957] You're number one.

[958] It's amazing.

[959] Police still want to find the woman's family so they can have a proper burial for her.

[960] And the reason they took those photos at the burial they made a photo album so that her family can have it one day.

[961] Why is this country so considerate?

[962] I don't know.

[963] We're staying.

[964] Can we stay?

[965] And that is the fucking is -so woman, you guys.

[966] Wow, that's amazing.

[967] Thank you.

[968] Legit amazing.

[969] Thank you.

[970] That's so fascinating.

[971] I think it was an Italian photographer.

[972] We met real Italians last.

[973] night in the VIP line.

[974] The guy kissed me on this cheek and then he kissed me on this cheek like a movie.

[975] It was the best.

[976] I literally said that he's he said hello and I could tell he had an accent.

[977] So I asked him where he was from and he said Italy and I went, you're real Italians right in his face like a goddamn idiot.

[978] He said to me he like whispered he was like I got you were talking to his wife and he was like I got to tell you guys how to do this murder from Italy and I was like tell it to me don't tell Karen.

[979] because I want to do it.

[980] And I wrote it down and he was like, explaining it to me, like really broken in like a thick Italian accent.

[981] And the way he told me, he, I have never heard about mutilated genitals in the most, like, sweet, lovely way.

[982] Oh, and they, like, the most, like, respectable way of telling me what the guy did.

[983] And I was like, wow, you should be a newscaster.

[984] You should have been like, I didn't need to go that far into.

[985] the case.

[986] Yeah.

[987] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.

[988] Absolutely.

[989] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash.

[990] Exactly.

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[1005] That's Shopify .com slash murder.

[1006] Goodbye.

[1007] Well, I'm going to do the black metal murders.

[1008] Oh, shit.

[1009] Pandering.

[1010] Pandering.

[1011] God, I'm sorry, but there was like a half second pause that scared the shit out of me on that, you guys.

[1012] Well, it took me a minute, too.

[1013] We're doing the fucking the best of.

[1014] show, aren't we?

[1015] Yeah, and there was also, there was a guy in the VIP line last night and an Irish guy that was like, have you heard of the black metal merchant?

[1016] I was like, shut your mouth.

[1017] Oh, yeah.

[1018] I heard you yelling at him, but I didn't hear it.

[1019] Screamed.

[1020] I screamed in his face.

[1021] It was fun.

[1022] That's how I bond with listeners.

[1023] Some guy in the VIP, sorry, this is the last story.

[1024] I said to me, you couldn't, you couldn't be more Georgia if you tried in person.

[1025] And I was like, thanks.

[1026] It's true.

[1027] You are so Georgia.

[1028] I am.

[1029] So a lot of the information on got from the story, I got from a very good podcast called Disgraceland.

[1030] Oh, yeah.

[1031] And Disgraceland, he does stories about musicians and bands and fucked up shit that happens in the music world, but they're really short.

[1032] His podcasts are like 20 minutes long.

[1033] I was like, how do you do this?

[1034] It's like a snack.

[1035] It's, yeah, it's really well produced, really good.

[1036] The host's named Jake Brennan.

[1037] And so he covered Black Metal Martyrs.

[1038] So some of the more like deep divey stuff is from his.

[1039] His 20 -minute podcast, where he does 10 times more research than I ever can.

[1040] And seven hours are two hours long.

[1041] Yeah.

[1042] So he had this interesting theory.

[1043] So just in starting that the rise of black metal in Norway.

[1044] So like Norwegian black metal was the subgenre genre of heavy metal music.

[1045] And also if you are into metal, metal music, I thoroughly apologize because I feel like you're going to be fucking livid at the end of this story.

[1046] I've only been stuck in the backseat of cars from guys I went to high school with driving me around and blasting Slayer.

[1047] That's how I know metal.

[1048] So I'm absolutely like so removed from this.

[1049] I'm going to pretend I know what I'm talking about, as I always do.

[1050] But I super do nod on this one.

[1051] But Jake Brennan from Disgraceland is talking about how, so Norway is one of the richest countries in the world.

[1052] And it's true.

[1053] And you take the best care for pensions and older people, like they put it all back into the community.

[1054] It's incredible.

[1055] You guys would hate the U .S. It is every fucking man for himself over there.

[1056] So one of his theories about the right.

[1057] rise of Norwegian black metal was that the frustrated of, you know, that teenage angst that you have, but that in the 80s and 90s in Norway, teenagers didn't really have that much to rebel against.

[1058] So like punk rock came out of like, you know, poverty in England and, you know, Brooklyn or whatever and people picking up, there's a garbage strike, so you pick up an old garbage bag on the street and suddenly that's your shirt.

[1059] And then you put a, you know, you put a safety pin in your nose and you're like fuck the queen or whatever and all makes sense all makes sense yeah yeah yeah but in this scenario because there's nothing to rebel against people the people who want to be rebellious and I absolutely empathize and understand to a degree up to like listening to the go -go's that's that's my level of rebellion just really loud nasal singing all girl bands fuck you mom I'm gonna listen to pop I'm gonna go to the dance mom Anyway, that basically that they kind of had to dig deeper because the normal heavy metal that they were served up, which is Mega Death and Slayer and Metallica and all those, they had all done what you know, heavy metal music had done before, which is, you know, Satanism got introduced in early.

[1060] That was like a Led Zeppelin thing.

[1061] That was, it wasn't new.

[1062] So basically they kind of looked at, it was like how do we get more fucked up around this?

[1063] Music genre.

[1064] And it's also very fascinating because I remember seeing there was one of those true crime shows that did this story.

[1065] And they opened up talking about because one of the big bad things that happens at the beginning of the story is that all these 12th century incredible historic churches start getting burned all around Norway.

[1066] And they say that it's the idea is that instead of being like, oh, we're Satanists and the devil and the devil.

[1067] Like, that isn't enough.

[1068] And what the goal became to attack Christianity directly.

[1069] So it's not like, hey, mom, can you believe I'm a Satanist?

[1070] It's like, no, we need to end that fucking oppressive religion that came into our country.

[1071] Because we used to be pagans and we used to be, you know, Norse gods and all that shit.

[1072] You know what you're like.

[1073] You know what you're like.

[1074] You know how you are with your roots and your paganism and your, Satanism and your environmentalism, which is a big part of it.

[1075] You love the forest.

[1076] And you love a human sacrifice.

[1077] So God bless you all.

[1078] Which I just think is a fascinating, because, yeah, so anyway, so it's just a fascinating, like, structure to set things up.

[1079] Because oftentimes in these true crime things, it's like, can you believe these crazy assholes that were just criminals?

[1080] And it's like, no, everybody has a reason.

[1081] And everybody is kind of like, you know.

[1082] So, Okay.

[1083] So we're going to start black.

[1084] I'm already so tired.

[1085] And my hair is still wet.

[1086] It hasn't dried in any way.

[1087] So the black metal subgenre of heavy metal music was invented.

[1088] I sound like your mom talking about heavy metal music.

[1089] It is so embarrassing.

[1090] I like it.

[1091] It was black metal music was invented here in Norway.

[1092] Some say on August 16th, 1987 with the release.

[1093] Oh, that's specific.

[1094] Yes.

[1095] On the day of the release of the band Mayhem's first demo, death crush.

[1096] Do you know I had a, I, I dated a metal dude in high school, like my first boyfriend.

[1097] What was his name?

[1098] His name was Chris Pratt, which is like, complicated.

[1099] What?

[1100] Prap Prat.

[1101] We met in rehab.

[1102] Seriously.

[1103] I saw him walking down the rehab hallway the day he got there and he had a slayer shirt on and the gnarliest goatee and long hair tied back in earrings and shit, and I was like, and he was fucking hot.

[1104] And I was like, damn.

[1105] And then our song was a Slayer song.

[1106] Did you slow dance to a Slayer song?

[1107] No. No. Just F -U -C -E -D too.

[1108] No?

[1109] No. No, Vince.

[1110] No. No. No. No. No. Good girl.

[1111] Go on.

[1112] I like, I have, I, there's a lot of comics that I started comedy with.

[1113] They're super into metal music.

[1114] And the funny thing to me is that they're, deep down, they're super sensitive to the point where, like, if you don't save them a chair at dinner, they'll leave, the, like, storm out of dinner.

[1115] Like, you knew I was coming, where it's like, I'm sorry, weren't you just worshipping Satan?

[1116] Now you're mad about dinner?

[1117] What's, I can't track you.

[1118] I'm tougher than you are.

[1119] Okay.

[1120] So, Mayhem's guitarist and the founder is a guy named Austin Arsah.

[1121] great she's totally out she's just not even playing anymore she's sleeping but he goes by the name eronymous uh right they all have stage names i'm gonna call them stage names because i'm from the theater i mean it is they all rename themselves these names that i'm sure at the time we're very daunting and upsetting but now i think are fucking hilarious so will you start calling me Euronymous?

[1122] Yes, I will.

[1123] Great.

[1124] Euronymous.

[1125] Okay.

[1126] You know someone's, I'm sorry, you know someone's cat's named Euronymous in this theater.

[1127] Yes.

[1128] Someone with a black cat named Euronymous and, uh, well, there's a, you're about to hear.

[1129] Okay.

[1130] And then you can pick the cat name at the end when you hear all these great names.

[1131] Okay, go, go, go, good, great, right.

[1132] Okay.

[1133] I think Hillhammer's coming up here somewhere.

[1134] Oh, that would be a kitten named Hellhammer.

[1135] Do you know there's, like a little long -haired kitten?

[1136] Oh, he's so cute.

[1137] Hell a hammer.

[1138] Can I say one more fucking annoying things?

[1139] No, always.

[1140] There's also a Twitter account called Black Metal Cats.

[1141] What?

[1142] That is like photos of cats looking tough and then a quote, a black metal lyric as the tweet.

[1143] Like with the black metal cat.

[1144] Yes.

[1145] It's so hilarious.

[1146] It's just like a cat walking through the forest.

[1147] Then it's like seasons of death.

[1148] Like it's the best.

[1149] Okay.

[1150] Okay, I'm done.

[1151] We got to look at that.

[1152] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1153] Everybody, feel free to pull out your phones and look at that right now.

[1154] I don't care.

[1155] Okay.

[1156] So, Uronima starts Mayhem in 1984 with his bass player, whose name was John Stubberid.

[1157] I don't care what his real name was.

[1158] Oh, okay, because his fake name was Necro Butcher.

[1159] Oh.

[1160] Yes.

[1161] Duran -na -na -na -na -na -na -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha -ha.

[1162] Thank you.

[1163] Thank you.

[1164] Necrow Butcher.

[1165] My instrument.

[1166] I damaged my instrument.

[1167] How do they do it?

[1168] That's really, I am impressed by all metal bands.

[1169] They're the ones that do that because you're singing like the cookie monster for hours, hours at a time.

[1170] Yeah, and you're not trained to do it that way.

[1171] They're like opera singers that have taken it in a different direction.

[1172] Okay.

[1173] So Necro Butcher and Euronomist start this fucking big.

[1174] band.

[1175] Everybody loves it.

[1176] They're just like, this is the shit.

[1177] And it's like the mid -80s, so it's very, very new.

[1178] During the Cold War.

[1179] We know.

[1180] Right?

[1181] So the lead singer, I honestly just damaged my larynx.

[1182] The lead singer is a 19 -year -old named Per Olin.

[1183] He moved to Norway from Sweden to join the band, and he and Euronymous were roommates and best friends.

[1184] I don't think black metal did is going to have besties.

[1185] Wikipedia says they can Remains and best friends Hellhammer you can't come It's just our night Stay home and take care of the kitten Stay out of it, necromancer You're the kitten uncle, you need to stay home I'm just loving cats Okay So Pairr, when he joins the band Changes his name to Dead Kind of love it I mean, it's simple, it's quick, it's clean, you know exactly what he's going for.

[1186] It's kind of like performance artie.

[1187] Yeah.

[1188] Dead.

[1189] Well, he really does throw himself into it because before shows, he buries his clothes under the ground.

[1190] What?

[1191] And then digs him up and puts him on, so he's like a real corpse.

[1192] I don't think he's like a real corpse.

[1193] I think it just has dirty clothes.

[1194] Well, he also was the first, they credit him in this scene with being the first to wear what they call corpse.

[1195] makeup, which is like not Kiss, not Alice Cooper, but like the white and black where they're trying to actually look dead.

[1196] Okay.

[1197] So, Dead did it first.

[1198] Dead did dead before dead was dead.

[1199] Dead.

[1200] Dead.

[1201] The deadest.

[1202] Got it.

[1203] He also used to carry a dead bird around in a bag before shows and then inhale it so that he would have the smell of death in his nostrils where it's like, you will get Lyme disease.

[1204] Yeah.

[1205] What are you doing?

[1206] Ew.

[1207] But I feel like...

[1208] That's what I do too backstage.

[1209] What have I did that?

[1210] Oh, George...

[1211] Vince, did you get Georgia her bird?

[1212] There's some places where you can only get a chicken.

[1213] Just like a chicken breast in a bag.

[1214] But it smells like death.

[1215] And that's what I need.

[1216] Oh, I love that idea.

[1217] So much.

[1218] Put it right into the script, Stephen, of a podcasters.

[1219] Oh, the podcast show?

[1220] Spy podcasters.

[1221] We're going to do a chicken breast scene.

[1222] Make sure they have two chicken breasts in case we both want one.

[1223] Yeah.

[1224] And, of course, two brown bags that look like they're from the candy shop.

[1225] Okay.

[1226] He, when they would do their concerts, their live performance concerts, playing their instruments for each other.

[1227] Dead would cut himself on stage.

[1228] They would have pig heads.

[1229] on the stage.

[1230] It was super fucked.

[1231] It was just a big fucked up contest.

[1232] Who can be the more fucked up.

[1233] Um, and they were all winning.

[1234] Um, now what's interesting is, oh, and all of the members of Mayhem lived in an old house in the forest near Oslo, which is rad.

[1235] Yeah, yeah.

[1236] Um, so I bet it was smelled so bad.

[1237] I'm, it, the dead birds were piled around.

[1238] There's like dirty, like soil and crusted clothing and then just dead birds.

[1239] Okay.

[1240] Oh, the host of disgrace land actually suggests that there is a chance that dead may have actually been suffering from something called Cotter's syndrome, which is a mental illness where people actually believe that they are dead, that they are corpses walking around and that they're putrefying.

[1241] Wow.

[1242] And it's a real syndrome that some people get.

[1243] And he definitely, had severe clinical depression.

[1244] And I think that also is a lot of people were in this scene kind of like obviously rebelling that whole thing.

[1245] But then there's also there's a coping aspect of it too where it's like, you know, we all do it.

[1246] When you all get together and you're like here.

[1247] No, I'm the most fucked up.

[1248] Oh yeah.

[1249] Okay.

[1250] So they move into the house in the forest, which I wish I could see a picture of.

[1251] And Necro butcher later says that they, after living together for a while dead and Euronymous kind of started fighting.

[1252] They weren't best friends anymore.

[1253] They got on each other's nerves a lot.

[1254] Apparently Euronimus would play synthesizer music and dead would get really mad and go outside.

[1255] This was a fight they had once.

[1256] He went outside, got mad, was like pouting outside, but with corpse makeup on.

[1257] And then Uronomus came outside and shot a gun up into the air.

[1258] What the fuck?

[1259] Well, you're mad?

[1260] Now I'm shooting a gun.

[1261] It's the perfect solution.

[1262] Sure.

[1263] Oh, sorry.

[1264] Hellhammer is the one that told that story.

[1265] Hellhammer.

[1266] You and I need to fucking up our fights.

[1267] Yes.

[1268] We have to get rifles.

[1269] We'll talk about it later.

[1270] Okay.

[1271] So, oh, and that at one point, They claim, the band claims that once dead stabbed Euronymous with the knife, because they were fighting.

[1272] Okay.

[1273] So then it, of course, turns even darker than Norwegian black death metal.

[1274] Black metal.

[1275] On April 8, 1991, dead commits suicide in his and Euronimus's forest home in the bandhouse.

[1276] And this is so fucked up.

[1277] He slid his own wrists.

[1278] then he cut his throat, then he shot himself in the head.

[1279] Jesus.

[1280] And then he left a note that said, excuse all the blood, cheers.

[1281] Wow, dude.

[1282] Yeah.

[1283] Dark metal to the end, man. He was, I think he was, yeah, I think, yeah.

[1284] I think he just had very bad clinical depression and just didn't know what to fucking do with himself.

[1285] So now let's go one step more fucked up, because this is just going to be as fucked up as it can be.

[1286] When Uronomus finds Dead's body, he doesn't call the authorities, he doesn't call anybody's family, he goes and buys a camera, and then he comes back, and he takes pictures of the horrifying scene, and then he walks around and he collects pieces of Dead's skull, and he later made necklaces out of those pieces of skull, and he would give them to different members of their clique of like the local musicians who are in bands.

[1287] Uh -huh.

[1288] And then he also took some brain matter so that he could eat it later because he wanted everyone to know that he was a cannibal.

[1289] Oh, God.

[1290] So...

[1291] Fucking 19 -year -olds, man. They're so obnoxious.

[1292] It's not cool.

[1293] Here's one step worse.

[1294] Later on, in 1995, Mayhem used one of those pictures of the suicide scene as cover art for their live album, Dawn of the Black Hearts.

[1295] Oh, no. And I think that's supposed to be an ironic joke that it was the live album, and the cover is a fucking photo of a suicide.

[1296] Of a guy named dead.

[1297] Of a guy named dead.

[1298] That's clever.

[1299] The politest smattering of applause for that horrifying.

[1300] God forbid their staff members in this room, right now.

[1301] We're so sorry.

[1302] We're so sorry.

[1303] We're so sorry.

[1304] Okay.

[1305] So this is, now we're getting the sense of how intense this scene is and how devoted.

[1306] And it's not just like, oh, I'm going to get a tattoo and smoke and say, fuck you.

[1307] Yeah.

[1308] It's everybody's like, they're constantly accusing people of being posers.

[1309] You have to like, you have to be really dedicated and show how fucked up you are, essentially.

[1310] So Euronymous opens, um, a month after dead commit suicide, Euronymous opens a record shop called Helvetay.

[1311] Hey, what?

[1312] I know it means hell.

[1313] I didn't get to that part yet.

[1314] I was trying to pretend I could speak Norwegian.

[1315] What'd you say?

[1316] Helvetta.

[1317] Yeah.

[1318] Which means hell.

[1319] Norway.

[1320] Oh, you stole her crowning line.

[1321] That was my, you jumped the bit.

[1322] So that record shop becomes a meeting ground for all these black metal musicians, and the guys that begin to frequent the shop start to be known as the Black Circle.

[1323] And one of the guys is a man named Varg Vercas.

[1324] No?

[1325] Varga Vigvikis.

[1326] Wow.

[1327] We're going to call him Vargas.

[1328] from now on.

[1329] Is that good?

[1330] He's also, his stage name is Count Grishnak.

[1331] Count Grishnak.

[1332] Which sounds like Steve Martin is playing Dracula or something, doesn't it?

[1333] This is a comedy.

[1334] It sounds like your shop teacher.

[1335] Mr. Grishnak, I don't want.

[1336] Mr. Grishnack, can I go to the restroom?

[1337] I don't...

[1338] Okay.

[1339] Okay, so...

[1340] Varg, He is actually this amazing musician.

[1341] He was a one man. He had a band called Burzum, probably.

[1342] And it was just him.

[1343] He played every instrument or whatever.

[1344] So he was very well known, and that band was very well respected in this scene.

[1345] And so they get him to join the band after dead commit suicide.

[1346] So then, basically as they meet and they're hanging out, and it's this thing of like, they know what Euronymous did.

[1347] with the suicide scene and all the horrible fucked up shit.

[1348] So everyone is just trying to, like, you know, beat everybody else.

[1349] So people start desecrating graves, and then the churches begin to burn.

[1350] Now, this was a year after dead suicide on June 6, 1992, the Fantoft Stavv Church.

[1351] Oh, wow.

[1352] Nice.

[1353] Wow.

[1354] So it was built in 1150.

[1355] No, we don't.

[1356] That's too old.

[1357] It's so old, and it looks like something from Middle Earth.

[1358] It's amazing.

[1359] It's like, they rebuilt it, right?

[1360] Yeah.

[1361] It's really amazing looking.

[1362] But it's like, it's got all these roofs.

[1363] It almost looks like a pagoda in a way.

[1364] Like, it's so fucking old.

[1365] That's so insulting to them.

[1366] No, I know.

[1367] A pagoda looks like that.

[1368] They ripped it off from the Japanese easily.

[1369] No. I didn't mean like that, but like, when you see it, you just go, nothing like that exists anymore.

[1370] And this was the only, the one of the only ones left.

[1371] You have dicks.

[1372] These guys who burned it, not you guys who built it.

[1373] I was mad at them for building it.

[1374] Start attacking people.

[1375] What dicks!

[1376] Okay.

[1377] So, of course, the story, this church burning down is, it's, you know, a national treasure.

[1378] It makes, of course, the news.

[1379] And they find satanic symbols around the site.

[1380] Nobody knows what's going on or why anybody would.

[1381] do that.

[1382] But of course, the medals of the Norwegian black metal metal scene do.

[1383] And so then they see that that church got burned and they start burning all the churches.

[1384] And over 30 architecturally and historically significant churches around Norway were destroyed in these arson fires.

[1385] And one firefighter lost his life and trying to fight the blaze.

[1386] So in January of 1993, Two friends decide they're going to interview Varg, and he wants to talk about the black metal scene.

[1387] He wants to talk about the church fires, and they're going to bring it all to the Norway's biggest, one of Norway's biggest newspapers, Bergensteinte.

[1388] You committed.

[1389] No. That wasn't it, was it?

[1390] Bergensteinna.

[1391] Sorry.

[1392] Sorry.

[1393] Sorry.

[1394] I'm sorry.

[1395] I stole your thunder.

[1396] Do you have, like, an ear for Norwegian?

[1397] I think I can hear better than you.

[1398] Oh, okay.

[1399] I got to put my hearing aids on.

[1400] I got to bring my hearing horn out.

[1401] So they're like, okay, we're going to interview him, and then we're going to bring this story to Norway's, one of Norway's biggest newspapers, hoping they'll print it.

[1402] And then, of course, when they get this story, a journalist named Finn Bjorn Tonder, he arranges an interview with them because they're like, oh, we think we found out who has been burning these churches.

[1403] So they have him.

[1404] come to an apartment, and when the journalist gets there, they tell him if he goes to the police about anything he's about to hear, they'll shoot him.

[1405] So then...

[1406] But the paper's fine, but the newspaper's okay?

[1407] Yeah.

[1408] It doesn't work like that.

[1409] It's like he just can't tell details.

[1410] He can't report them.

[1411] Okay.

[1412] Or say who it is.

[1413] So then Varg goes on to explain that he knows who burnt the churches.

[1414] He's not saying he did it, but he might have done it, but other people did it.

[1415] I don't know.

[1416] Give me credit, but also don't put me in jail.

[1417] So he basically says the attacks are going to continue, and he tells the reporter, they're devil -worshippers, and, quote, our intention is to spread fear and devilry.

[1418] And that's why we're telling this, too.

[1419] Bertelgansdiddle didn't.

[1420] Close.

[1421] So later on in years later in other interviews, he actually said, he explains, the Christians desecrated our graves, our burial mounds, so it's revenge.

[1422] For each desecrated graveyard, one heathen grave is avenged.

[1423] And for every ten churches burnt to ashes, one heathen hoff, which is a Norse pagan temple, is avenged.

[1424] And for each ten priests or Freemasons assassinated, one heathen is avenged.

[1425] So he's fun.

[1426] He's a good guy.

[1427] Okay, so, of course, the journalist gets the story, and it immediately becomes a front -page story, and the article is titled, We Lit the Fires.

[1428] And there's a picture of Varg.

[1429] No. Holding two knives.

[1430] His face is, like, slightly obscured.

[1431] He was like, you promised.

[1432] You snitched on me to a newspaper as a journalist.

[1433] When I talk to you, snitches get candy.

[1434] Um, so, so basically Vargan and Euronymous, they planned this interview.

[1435] They wanted to scare people.

[1436] They wanted to promote black metal.

[1437] And they wanted to get more customers to the record shop.

[1438] You guys need to, you got to pick which direction you're going in.

[1439] Like commerce and like fucking, or are you going to go that way?

[1440] Well, and the sad thing is they did not see the, the huge return vinyl was going to make.

[1441] Like they were so early in.

[1442] that game and like now they'd be so rich anyway by the time the story hits the sands vargs already been arrested um good yeah so he claims uh oh he claims he claims that the journal snitched on him but the police are like no we actually found your home address on an old bursam flyer so he didn't exactly cover his tracks okay so he's held in jail for six weeks the charges don't stick because of course there's no evidence that directly ties him to any of these church fires.

[1443] And so he's released.

[1444] But during those six weeks that he was in jail, in January of 1993, Euronymous closes the record shop because they've gotten such intense media, negative media attention and pressure.

[1445] So Var gets out of jail like, I did it.

[1446] I took the hit for the team because we're, and it's like closed, shades pulled.

[1447] And of course, he's livid and so are all the members of the black circle because they don't have a cool clubhouse to go to and fucking talk about their feelings.

[1448] What if they just went there and talked about their feelings?

[1449] So many less churches would have burned down.

[1450] It was like just group therapy.

[1451] Yeah.

[1452] I'd just sit in a circle like, I guess I just like to rock because my dad was mean.

[1453] Yeah.

[1454] Okay.

[1455] So, oh and somewhere in there, Euronis also started his own record label because all these bands started, of course, popping up everywhere.

[1456] Smart.

[1457] Right?

[1458] So, so him closing that, it was basically like he was kind of the king of the scene, but then nobody really, they didn't want that.

[1459] They wouldn't want any one guy to be in charge, and there was a lot of, you know, I guess, struggling for power or whatever.

[1460] So tensions are building, evil feelings, satanic, bad vibes.

[1461] It all leads up to the night of August 10th, 1993, when Varg goes over to Euronomous's place with a guy named Snor.

[1462] Now Wow.

[1463] That's the best.

[1464] Yeah.

[1465] That's his actual, that's not his stage name.

[1466] That's his working name.

[1467] That's his given name, Snore.

[1468] Okay.

[1469] And I like it so much I forgot to write down his stage name.

[1470] It's just, I was like, Snore, this is the best.

[1471] So it's like, I imagine, like, you know, Snow White and the Seven Dwar's, like, he looks like sleepy.

[1472] Yeah.

[1473] Because it's snore.

[1474] Okay.

[1475] They get into a disagreement with Euronymous.

[1476] At first they say it's about royalties for old Bursam recordings that Euronim isn't giving them through the label.

[1477] Like, it's basically a money fight.

[1478] But Varg ends up stabbing Euronimus 23 times.

[1479] Sixteen of those wounds were in his back.

[1480] Whoa.

[1481] And still, Varg claims it was self -defense.

[1482] So he's arrested nine days later, and when he's arrested, police find 150 kilograms of explosives and 3 ,000 rounds of ammunition in his home.

[1483] Yes.

[1484] So come to find out that Varg had other plans going on.

[1485] And what he was going to do, and he was actually on the verge of doing, was blowing up the radical leftist anarchist space in Oslo called Blitzhouse.

[1486] he was going to blow that up and he was basically on the verge but he knew Euronymous didn't want him to because Euronymous deep down they said was a communist so he was like he would have been I don't know I don't understand Wikipedia sometimes I just cut it and I paste it but essentially it didn't line up with Eronomus's true politics and so so he wouldn't have approved and so but then when they asked Varg himself, he says that he had the explosives and the ammunition in order to defend Norway in case they were attacked by the United States or the Soviet Union.

[1487] Sorry.

[1488] Because it was still the Cold War.

[1489] What?

[1490] You have questions?

[1491] Questions and comments?

[1492] When they asked Varg, he told them, because he was alive still?

[1493] Yes.

[1494] Varg stabbed Geronimus to death.

[1495] Got it.

[1496] Got it, got, got, got it.

[1497] Record store owner?

[1498] Yeah, you know, yeah, I heard it the other way around.

[1499] Okay.

[1500] Okay, so there's a lot of names in the story.

[1501] And many of them don't attach to a real person, like, Hellhammer.

[1502] Who is that?

[1503] I'm trying to picture a Hellhammer.

[1504] Like, what would a Hellhammer look like.

[1505] Well, you know what's actually fun is you can click on the names to, like, when I was trying to find out who the original bass player for fucking Mayhem was.

[1506] That's how I spent my time today.

[1507] And it came up on that guy's page, and he's like a 52 -year -old dude playing the bass with nothing.

[1508] He just looks like, da -na -na -na -na -na -na -ba -bo -bo -bo -blah.

[1509] Like, he's having a great time.

[1510] Like, this is just a thing.

[1511] He got out very quickly, and it's just like, you guys are way too intense.

[1512] I just want to jam.

[1513] I just wanted to drink some lowenbrows and kick back.

[1514] So, yeah.

[1515] Okay.

[1516] It's, yeah.

[1517] So essentially, Varg thought that either the United States or the Soviet Union was going to attack Norway, and he wanted to get ready for it.

[1518] Because in his words, we have no reason to trust either the government, the royal family or the military because of what happened the last time we were attacked.

[1519] So, you know, he's got a point.

[1520] At his trial, it was claimed that Varg, snore, and another friend, plebe, just make sounds, had planned the murder together and that the third person, the third friend, stayed at the apartment in Bergen as an alibi and to make it look like they never left.

[1521] So he was using Vargs.

[1522] He was renting movies using Vargs credit card and basically creating a paper trail so it looked like Varg was somewhere else.

[1523] So it was clearly premeditated.

[1524] It was not, I went over there to ask for money and then we ended up getting in a fight and it was self -defense where I stabbed somebody in the back 16 times.

[1525] On May 16th, 1994, Varg was sentenced to 21 years in prison, which is the maximum penalty in Norway.

[1526] And he was charged with the murder of Euronymous and the arson of three churches of which I cannot say the names.

[1527] the attempted arson of a fourth and for the theft of 150 kilograms of explosives from where I know they need to fucking lock that shit up a little better get a padlock at the very least one of those ones from junior high yeah just don't give away the code don't tell anyone that it's your birthday what one two three four um when they read that sentence Varg was smiling because he rocked till the very end And in February of 1993, the Norwegian magazine, Rock Fuhror.

[1528] Sure.

[1529] Is it out of print?

[1530] Everyone's like, we never got that magazine.

[1531] It was not good.

[1532] Well, they published in an interview where Varg said of the prison system, it's much too nice here.

[1533] It's not hell at all.

[1534] In this country, prisoners get a bed, a toilet, and a shower.

[1535] It's completely ridiculous.

[1536] I ask the police to throw me in a real dungeon.

[1537] and also encourage them to use violence.

[1538] What?

[1539] There is a chance that if things had gone a little bit differently for Vark, he would have just been really into S &M.

[1540] And, like, Dungeons and Dragons and shit.

[1541] Like, it could have gone real light and easy for him.

[1542] What's interesting then is, because I thought I had saw something about this, I looked it up, Norwegian prisons.

[1543] I bet they're fucking nice, right?

[1544] They're the most luxurious in the world, but they've won design, stop it.

[1545] Hold my hand.

[1546] They've won design awards.

[1547] What?

[1548] But Norwegian criminals demonstrate the lowest rate of reoffending in Europe, if not the world.

[1549] We're showing off.

[1550] You do it all right.

[1551] I just love that idea where it's just like, it doesn't work that way.

[1552] You can't just like punish people into the ground and be like, yeah, I get it now.

[1553] Now I'm happy that you've killed.

[1554] my face into the dirt.

[1555] You guys keep setting examples and we keep going, yeah, but we don't think so.

[1556] Yeah.

[1557] Where America's like, oh, we'd like to privatize our prisons and so everyone can make money.

[1558] Oh, yeah, let's not get into it.

[1559] Hey, let's...

[1560] That's...

[1561] The real horror show.

[1562] So it turns out deep down and what's happening.

[1563] So Varg got out of prison in 2009.

[1564] Uh -oh.

[1565] Is he here?

[1566] He might be unlisted, sir.

[1567] The count.

[1568] But it turns out he basically, at the end of the day, he was a white supremacist.

[1569] Oh, okay.

[1570] And that's what all of his, he called it, I believe he said it's, uh, odalism, which was, he didn't, he didn't like the label of white supremacist or Nazi.

[1571] Oh, you can't get a picket, dude.

[1572] Well, he's, he's very independent spirit.

[1573] Okay.

[1574] And he likes to call the shots.

[1575] Um, he says odalism lies in paganism, traditional nationalism, racism, and environmentalism.

[1576] This is the first time those have been named together.

[1577] I mean, that's the festival I don't want to go to, ever.

[1578] What have you had the, I just picture the shirt from the festival, and it's like a globe, and it says those four things around it, and there's a heart.

[1579] It's like, people walking towards you are like, hey, uh, oh, oh, no, what?

[1580] Yes.

[1581] Also, this is just, I'll end it with this fun fact.

[1582] Varg has never in his life used alcohol or recreational drugs.

[1583] That's the problem.

[1584] That was all sobriety talking.

[1585] Oh, man. That whole time.

[1586] So that's the black metal murders of Norway.

[1587] Fascinating.

[1588] Awesome.

[1589] Thank you.

[1590] That was real fun.

[1591] That was fun.

[1592] I was really sweating during that.

[1593] Oh, yeah.

[1594] I was sweating too during mine.

[1595] Between the pronunciations and being judged by metalheads, So I was just like, I don't want, why did I do this to myself?

[1596] We really put ourselves at risk in this podcast.

[1597] Every goddamn day for you people.

[1598] I think we have time for a quick hometown.

[1599] Yeah, let's do it.

[1600] Can we have the lights up, if possible, just so we can see everybody.

[1601] Karen's going to tell you the rules while the lights get.

[1602] Well, oh, God, it's gorgeous in here.

[1603] Look at those light fixtures.

[1604] Jesus.

[1605] I'm wearing but you have.

[1606] You shouldn't have.

[1607] Okay.

[1608] Home town rules.

[1609] Okay.

[1610] We want it to be local, so please don't tell a story and then be like, I'm from Arizona, because no one gives a shit about that stuff.

[1611] You can be drunk, but you can't be so drunk that you can't follow your own story.

[1612] That's key.

[1613] It'd be great if it had an ending.

[1614] Some kind of a button to wrap it up, give us some satisfaction of some kind of.

[1615] It's just good for storytelling in general.

[1616] And just remember that everybody who didn't get picked hates your guts, so you need to move it along.

[1617] Okay.

[1618] Okay.

[1619] Oh, I'm picking it today?

[1620] No, no, you do it.

[1621] Okay.

[1622] Don't panic.

[1623] I'm panicking.

[1624] Oh, here's Vince.

[1625] Here's Vince with the right.

[1626] Okay.

[1627] What's her name?

[1628] I'm Sandra.

[1629] Sandra?

[1630] Look at her cute dress.

[1631] What's your name?

[1632] I'm Sandra.

[1633] Monsandra?

[1634] Sandra.

[1635] Sandra.

[1636] She said, I'm Sandra, but...

[1637] I'm really nervous.

[1638] Me too, me too.

[1639] Okay.

[1640] Your dress is amazing.

[1641] Thank you.

[1642] I love it.

[1643] Any pockets on there?

[1644] Yes, good.

[1645] Please take a lot.

[1646] No pockets.

[1647] Very disappointing, but it is my favorite dress.

[1648] Yeah, it's really good.

[1649] Sandra, where are you from?

[1650] I'm from Bergen.

[1651] Okay, great.

[1652] We've talked about it all night.

[1653] You talked about us a lot today.

[1654] Yeah, there's a lot going on up there, down there, over there.

[1655] Up there?

[1656] Down.

[1657] Started strong.

[1658] What's your hometown?

[1659] So I was on a train with two murder brothers, and I got them thrown off the train.

[1660] Me and my sister, we were going on a weekend trip here for a convention.

[1661] And how long ago was it?

[1662] It's a couple of years, five, six years ago.

[1663] And then on one of the stops, two people got on.

[1664] And at first we were like, okay, they're obviously drunk, but, you know, you do you.

[1665] Thank you.

[1666] Alcoholics, I want to say thank you.

[1667] It's really nice.

[1668] But then it's a six, six and a half hour long train ride.

[1669] So as the train ride was going along, they got progressively more drunk and more annoying.

[1670] And at one point I went to the bathroom and when I came back, one of them was yelling in my sister's face.

[1671] And my sister has autism.

[1672] So she was panicking.

[1673] And I just pointed at him and go, hey, you stop that.

[1674] Yes.

[1675] Wait, Sandra.

[1676] Can I ask what you do for a living?

[1677] At the time, I was working at an office.

[1678] Right now, I work at a Toys Ross in Oregon.

[1679] Perfect.

[1680] And I'm a, take no shit but do no harm kind of person.

[1681] Love it.

[1682] God bless.

[1683] And he was looking at me like, he wanted to murder me. But I was like, that's my sister, so fuck off.

[1684] And then I went to one of the people working at the train, and I was like, they're drinking, and they're in people's faces, is you need to get them off.

[1685] And she was like, okay, we're going to call the police.

[1686] But the thing about the stops on the train from Bergen to Oslo, not all of them have police stations that can handle drunk people.

[1687] So we had to wait for about an hour before they were front of the train.

[1688] And then finally the train stopped, they just panicked.

[1689] They started running and the police was running and my sister was crying.

[1690] And I was like, okay, it's going to be fine.

[1691] It's going to be fine.

[1692] We're going to Oslo and it's going to be fine.

[1693] And then we went to the convention, it was fine, and then we came back.

[1694] And then a week later, my mom called me while I was at work at the office.

[1695] And she was like, remember those two guys who got thrown off the train to Oslo?

[1696] I was like, yeah.

[1697] They murdered someone.

[1698] Oh, they stabbed someone multiple times.

[1699] And it was right across from the street where my mom worked.

[1700] That's why she knew about it.

[1701] Did it happen before or after they were?

[1702] It happened like literally a few hours before they got on the train.

[1703] Holy shit.

[1704] So I pointed at a murderer.

[1705] Oh, shit.

[1706] And went like, yeah.

[1707] So naturally, I was like, okay, but they're going to come murder me now.

[1708] So yeah, yeah, start locking my doors.

[1709] No, they got arrested and then they got the 21 -year -old sentence, which I think is too low, because they did murder someone.

[1710] And he was a person, most people are.

[1711] But, yeah, thankfully they got the jail time.

[1712] So not worrying too much now anymore.

[1713] But back then, I was like, yeah, okay, maybe.

[1714] maybe start wearing like an alarm and pepper spray.

[1715] Pepper spray the motherfuckers.

[1716] That is amazing.

[1717] That's so good.

[1718] Great job.

[1719] Thank you so much.

[1720] Sondra, everybody.

[1721] Such a good dress.

[1722] Such a good dress.

[1723] Knocked it out of the park.

[1724] That's what we like is like, yes.

[1725] Our hometown person was dressed better than both of us.

[1726] I know.

[1727] Can we trade outfits real quick?

[1728] Oh, that was amazing.

[1729] Oh, my God.

[1730] fucking Oslo.

[1731] You guys, that was so fast.

[1732] Fast.

[1733] Yeah.

[1734] I want to say, like, we were walking off of the plane today when we got to Oslo, and we were just both like in this thing, and I turned to you and go, what's this fucking life?

[1735] And it's so true because it never in my life did I think I would ever get, like, come to Norway and come to Oslo.

[1736] And this is so crazy that this podcast that I'm absolutely obsessed with and love, because it's this topic that means so much, to me because that's all I want to do is talk about it, has brought us here.

[1737] I'm so happy.

[1738] We're so fucking thankful for you guys.

[1739] And everything you've done for us, it's amazing.

[1740] And just thank you for buying tickets, for supporting, for listening.

[1741] I mean, when our, the agent that set up this tour, when he started talking about, like, Oslo and Stockholm and Amsterdam, I was like, they don't want this there.

[1742] Let's not bother those people.

[1743] They have all their brown bread and their herring.

[1744] They don't need our bullshit.

[1745] And I think I just, we were so nervous that I don't know what we were fucking nervous about.

[1746] But this has been such a beautiful night and such an incredible, like, it's so nice to be, feel so connected with you guys.

[1747] Like, what an exciting thing.

[1748] What an exciting thing.

[1749] But even in Oslo, we have.

[1750] People in a country all the way around the world, listen to George and I record personal conversations we have about serial killers on her couch at home.

[1751] It's incredible.

[1752] So thank you.

[1753] Yeah, on the couch that has old cat barf.

[1754] Oh, you don't know about that.

[1755] We're laying it all on the table in Osloom.

[1756] Yes, thank you for me. So accepting of our clothes and appearance and our non -professional demeanor, and please stay sexy.

[1757] And don't get out.