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[0] This is exactly right.
[1] Hey, this is exciting.
[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.
[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.
[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.
[5] Who killed Saz?
[6] And were they really after Charles?
[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?
[8] This season, murder hits close to home.
[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.
[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.
[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.
[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?
[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.
[14] Only murders in the building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.
[15] Goodbye.
[16] Hi, hello and welcome to my favorite murder.
[17] The mini -seoed.
[18] The many times.
[19] And we tell you your many, many stories.
[20] So you've written so many stories into us.
[21] And now we're going to present them to you.
[22] Back at you.
[23] Hometowns, things that have happened to you that got you into true crime in the first place.
[24] That was the original.
[25] Yeah, we've gone off into ghost stories.
[26] We've got off into sinkholes.
[27] We've gone off into, oh, we should probably tell people.
[28] No one else needs to tell us about the lady that fell into her own wall and then was discovered their years later.
[29] Or that someone's parents found an basement in their kitchen.
[30] Yes.
[31] Yes.
[32] It was a wine cellar.
[33] It was a wine cellar.
[34] We got that one.
[35] It's fine.
[36] We're updated.
[37] Now, I kind of love it because it's like our own Google Alert.
[38] Yeah.
[39] Anytime there's a sinkhole that happens around the globe, I'm the first one that knows about it.
[40] It's pretty great.
[41] There's no complaints over here.
[42] Yeah.
[43] But this is specifically, this is where we gather all those stories and then retell them to you it's almost like the the just the weird stories that you can't tell anyone else yeah we just want your weird stories bring your weird stories here then we'll tell everybody else yeah about them and yeah for example yeah are you ready i'm ready the subject line of this is john balushi haunted my baby brother dear karen georgia stephen and pets i've been wanting to write to you for some uh for a long time and finally during a recent and still active been to the podcast, got the inspiration.
[44] I grew up in the suburbs of Los Angeles with my parents, younger sister and younger brother.
[45] My brother at the time of the story takes place was two to three years old.
[46] One day, our house's septic tank backed up and flooded our entire house.
[47] My mother, being who she is, decided that the only place that could comfortably house a family of five was the Chateau Marmont.
[48] Oh, girl.
[49] Oh, damn.
[50] Oh, by the way, these are all Los Angeles based, we're having our Los Angeles show this week.
[51] Oh, that's right.
[52] In celebration of the Orphium show that we get to do for you guys this week.
[53] Stephen pulled all, uh, L .A. County.
[54] Mm -hmm.
[55] I went with some Burbank and some Glendale.
[56] Yeah.
[57] You're gone all over.
[58] You sprinkled the best of the best.
[59] Um, so that's what these are.
[60] So once we're talking about the Chateau Marmot, you know, we're in Hollywood baby.
[61] Shit, girl.
[62] So, so, uh, this mother of threes, like, let's get this whole act down to the Chateau Bomba.
[63] You know what?
[64] This is disgusting.
[65] Was your mother candy spelling?
[66] Okay, so we moved into one of the bungalows, a two -bedroom standalone house perched above the pool, which just so happened to be the same bungalow in which John Belushi died from an overdose in 1982.
[67] Shut up.
[68] My parents took the master bedroom.
[69] My sister and I shared the second bedroom and my brother, who was still in a crib.
[70] Got a large walking closet in joy.
[71] Throw your kid in the closet.
[72] Strange little things would happen in the house, like smoke alarms going off for no reason.
[73] They do that all the time.
[74] Doors slamming shut.
[75] That's the wind.
[76] Lights turning on and off.
[77] Electricity.
[78] Yeah, that's how lights work.
[79] And overall feeling that there was just some sort of energy around you.
[80] And it wasn't a negative energy, just a presence that you could feel like a soft breeze blowing by you.
[81] Well, well.
[82] That's a breeze.
[83] That's called a breeze.
[84] My toddler brother began waking up during the night, calling for my mom.
[85] She would repeatedly go check on him and comfort him and tell him to go back to sleep.
[86] One night she asked what was bothering him, and he replied, the funny man woke me up.
[87] He wants to play cars.
[88] She would frequently hear my brother talking to himself while playing, and strange things continued to happen throughout the bungalow.
[89] One day my brother was playing in his room.
[90] my mom walked by and saw him sitting on the floor she walked into the kitchen for a couple of minutes and then when she walked back in to look in on him he was no longer on the floor but standing up in his crib since she knew he couldn't climb up in there himself she asked him how he got there the funny man helped me the funny man he said this is absolutely the beginning of one of the insidious movies yeah i'm positive this is a a cheap and uh ultimately boring horror movie that you're setting up um no offense not boring to you but i see a lot of those movies really boring uh we eventually changed bungalows good plan yeah and didn't hear any more about about the funny man yeah but like the funny man like stay there because at the other bungalow it might be the scary man exactly right the mean man it might be the funny man is like your best possible fucking possibility think about all the other crazed asshole drug addicts from Los Angeles that have stayed at the Chateau Marmar.
[91] Go with the comedian.
[92] Yeah.
[93] Okay, so a few months later, my mom was in bed with my brother reading a book on the history of the hotel.
[94] She turned to the chapter with John Belushi with a black and white portrait of him, filling a page.
[95] My brother saw the photo and clearly recognizing it started giggling.
[96] What is it?
[97] She asked.
[98] He wouldn't answer her.
[99] He just continued to smile.
[100] She asked again, what are you laughing?
[101] do you know who that is and he giggled and nodded up and down who is that she asked that's my friend that's the funny man it turned out my little brother had been spending his nights playing games with a very lonely john balushi he was so young at the time there was no way there was no way he knew who john balushi was prior to all of this happening what if he was super into snout as a toddler naturally no one ever talked about his death in that bungalow to a toddler I hope you enjoyed this ghost story.
[102] It made me feel sorry for John Belushi, but I'm glad he found some solace hanging out with my brother and hopefully got a few laughs from him.
[103] Stay sexy, don't get murdered, Gina.
[104] Oh, my God.
[105] That's amazing.
[106] That is such a good family story.
[107] Yeah.
[108] That's what we want.
[109] We want family stories.
[110] Yeah, we could back that up.
[111] We could call the Chateau Marmont.
[112] We could call your mother.
[113] We could call your father brother.
[114] I want the stories that like your family always knows and talks about.
[115] And like, that's the thing that happened to aunt.
[116] whatever the fuck.
[117] They were all there.
[118] Remember when we were kids and that's that thing that happened.
[119] Yes.
[120] It might be about a fucking sinkhole.
[121] It might be about a thing that was found in the wall.
[122] It might be about your grandpa was a murderer.
[123] We'll just call them aunt stories from now on.
[124] It's the story your aunt told you.
[125] Yeah.
[126] All right.
[127] Here is one called murder in a composting toilet.
[128] Okay.
[129] Hey friends.
[130] you don't like it.
[131] Composing toilet.
[132] So you, it's where you pee and throw spinach?
[133] I don't know.
[134] Okay.
[135] Let's find out.
[136] All right.
[137] My name is Ava and I often listen to your podcast while driving my younger siblings, age 15, 11, and 7 home from school.
[138] Appropriate?
[139] Probably not.
[140] No. Are they now huge fans of yours?
[141] Oh yeah.
[142] We got the seven -year -old?
[143] Yes.
[144] Hell yes.
[145] Fuck you Disney Channel.
[146] When I went to a hippie school in Los Angeles until eighth grade and one of the things that the school is well known for is its biannual camping trips.
[147] Oh, hippie schools, man. Shit.
[148] Always giving you those sesame stick candies.
[149] Yeah, and like gold stars instead of grades and like, find your own curriculum.
[150] Yeah.
[151] I want to take a nap.
[152] Work at your pace.
[153] Yeah.
[154] We support your nap.
[155] No shoes.
[156] Wash your feet.
[157] Wash your feet.
[158] The wash her feet class.
[159] Okay.
[160] In 2014, my eighth grade class, oh, fuck, she's young.
[161] In 2014, my eighth grade class went camping at a strange, uh, intentional.
[162] community in central Oregon intentional it was no accident that that community was there I think it's like living your life intentional with intention with good with intention of like fucking hippies how about some rando shit yeah let's make shit weird and crazy come on it's the thing I'm eating I don't know I have no intention of finding out it doesn't matter pull fire alarm let's do I can get out of here so don't do that seven year old do it essentially living not like us yes with unintention Right.
[163] Okay.
[164] Beep -boop, boop.
[165] Okay.
[166] Intentional community in central Oregon.
[167] Think grown men striding around naked, people living in yurts, and pot everywhere.
[168] Okay.
[169] It was certainly an interesting decision on the part of the school to take 25 eighth graders there for two weeks.
[170] Jesus.
[171] But apart from a few leering old men, we had a pretty great time.
[172] Were them naked?
[173] Probably.
[174] I mean, what was leering at them, you know?
[175] A few months after we left, the community.
[176] community, I heard through the school's camping director and former resident of the community herself that there had been a murder at the community.
[177] Apparently, some guy went crazy because his wife was sleeping with another man. So he killed his wife's lover, chopped his body up, and put the pieces into the composting toilet they had on site, a toilet that I had fucking used just months before.
[178] Oh, my God.
[179] So, like, a composting bin is, like, you use it to then feed the plants and stuff, right?
[180] Yeah.
[181] So I think it's just basically instead of having plumbing, right, or having to like actually put lay pipes, if you will.
[182] Oh, I will.
[183] You shit into a bucket.
[184] A bucket that then there's things in there that break it all down.
[185] To return it to the earth.
[186] Gross.
[187] Right.
[188] I'm not going to explain how a composting toilet works.
[189] Well, and I just tried to, but I could absolutely be wrong.
[190] Well, she says because I'm not exactly sure and I don't feel like it.
[191] Okay.
[192] But I will say that that the toilet.
[193] was a great place to put a body because it already smelled like decomposing matter from all the compost.
[194] The body wasn't found for weeks after the killing and when it was, I don't think anybody in the community really said anything to authorities or outsiders.
[195] What?
[196] The only reason I heard about it is because this employee at my school is friends with the people in the community and knows I love hearing about scandal.
[197] It's scandal.
[198] God, it's not scandal and told me all about it.
[199] All I notes that the killer was exiled from the community and presumably unleashed upon the rest of the world shortly after the discovery of the victim's remains.
[200] God.
[201] Anyway, that's my hometownish murder.
[202] Hope you enjoyed it.
[203] Stay sexy and don't use a composting toilet.
[204] Ava.
[205] No problem, Ava.
[206] I was about to use one and now I'm going to go use indoor plumbing.
[207] So essentially it's like a nudist colony.
[208] For hippies, and people who, like, want to pretend that eating, like, a nut loaf makes them a better person than me. Okay.
[209] But then also people who have no respect for the law.
[210] Right.
[211] Well, yeah, like fucking street justice.
[212] Don't you fuck my wife?
[213] You know?
[214] Yeah, but no. No, 100 % no. Listen, grow up and put some clothes on.
[215] Please.
[216] Just, at least some bottoms.
[217] I don't want to see junk everywhere.
[218] Even just a simple loin cloth.
[219] wrap some shit around you like duct tape a leaf to your fucking dick is all i'm saying with scotch tape with scotch there's a seven -year -old listening oh okay okay eva eva please um this subject line is near kidnapping near kidnapping miss lighthearted okay hi mfm fam so my mom and our all and all her nine brothers and sisters grew up in pocoyma california which as georgia says even though she grew up around Los Angeles.
[220] She still has no idea where it is.
[221] I stand by that.
[222] You probably know it from LaBamba as Richie Valens grew up there too.
[223] Yes.
[224] Yes.
[225] Best movie.
[226] Anyway, they lived about a block away from the elementary school.
[227] They all, and most of their children later on, attended.
[228] One day, my aunt was walking home alone from first grade.
[229] Uh -huh.
[230] Go bye.
[231] Bye.
[232] Go home.
[233] Yep.
[234] Good luck.
[235] You're six.
[236] when a strange let's ask the seven -year -old listening right now how much would that freak you out if you had to walk alone for four blocks to your house imagine they they don't do it anymore no it's not done and most of us had more than four blocks to walk yeah I think we had a solid two miles yeah uphill yeah okay both way both ways um okay so she's walking home alone from first grade when a strange man in a car calls her over and tries to lure her in with the phrase, Oh, no. Come, eat chicken.
[237] No, that's not going to work on a six -year -old.
[238] Sorry.
[239] She was, of course, freaked to the F out and ran home crying, where she promptly told her eight other brothers and sisters what happened.
[240] I guess since older siblings can be assholes and she did make it home, they teased her about it for years, chasing her around and calling, Come eat chicken.
[241] Oh, my God.
[242] at her.
[243] This near kidnapping was used as a cautionary tale for all the kids in our family to show that you don't have to be far from home to be taken.
[244] Uh -huh, but also everyone will make fun of you about it.
[245] That's right.
[246] That's that usually it's in your worst time when your siblings will find a thing to hang over your head for the rest of your life.
[247] When my own son at eight years old tried to convince me that he was old enough to walk the block home from his own elementary school, I told him this story as one of the reasons why, close to home doesn't always mean safe when i was done he looked up at me with wide brown eyes burst out laughing and said only why chicken i guess kids don't scare as easily as they used to anyway my five sisters and i love the show wow wow sisters that's six the six sisters altogether what's wrong with your brothers what's that what's wrong with your brothers why do they hate us oh because they don't like fucking vocal right fuck you whoops SSDGM, Veronica.
[248] That was a great story, Veronica.
[249] Oh, come eat chicken.
[250] Come eat chicken.
[251] I picture it's the most interesting man in the world from the Dosaki's commercial sitting in a shitty car.
[252] And actually, he really just wanted to feed her, like, his new recipe of, like, the best chicken in the fucking world.
[253] That's right.
[254] He's like, you must try this.
[255] My spices.
[256] So spicy.
[257] It's been brining and beer.
[258] All right.
[259] Okay.
[260] And just a drop of manning.
[261] Ew.
[262] Go ahead.
[263] I'm a chef.
[264] Oh, right.
[265] Drop of mayonnaise.
[266] Maneis.
[267] Why is it so loose that it's dropping?
[268] You know why?
[269] Because I left it out in the sun.
[270] Picture the smell of mayonnaise right now.
[271] Go ahead.
[272] I'm going to let you do it.
[273] No. It's so sour.
[274] Yuck.
[275] Do it.
[276] Because you making me do that now.
[277] You know my mayonnaise memory is when my mom would deep condition her hair on the weekends by putting mayonnaise in her hair.
[278] hair like me and wrapping it with saran wrap and she had long nails and she would get mayonnaise under her nails yeah i don't know why i did that a nightmare no i remember that of this just disgusting smell yeah but the softest hair i mean really nice hair she asked the softest smelly hair it smelled like for two shampoos after all right listen look you can afford alberto v5 now afford a one dollar 99 cent pack of fucking single use alberto v5 that's right heat it up in a glass of a glass of hot water here that's right karen you know i'm all about vintage shopping absolutely and when you say vintage you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash exactly and if you're a small business owner you might know shopify is great for online sales but did you know that they also power in -person sales that's right shopify is the sound of selling everywhere online in store on social media and beyond give your point of sales system a serious upgrade with Shopify.
[279] From accepting payments to managing inventory, they have everything you need to sell in person.
[280] So give your point of sale system a serious upgrade with Shopify.
[281] Their sleek, reliable POS hardware takes every major payment method and looks fabulous at the same time.
[282] With Shopify, we have a powerful partner for managing our sales, and if you're a business owner, you can too.
[283] Connect with customers in line and online.
[284] Do retail right with Shopify.
[285] Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify .com slash murder.
[286] Important note, that promo code is all lowercase.
[287] Go to Shopify .com slash murder to take your retail business to the next level today.
[288] That's Shopify .com slash murder.
[289] Goodbye.
[290] Hey, this is exciting.
[291] An all new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.
[292] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster detectives.
[293] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.
[294] Who killed Saz?
[295] And were they really after Charles?
[296] Why would someone want to kill Charles?
[297] This season, murder hits close to home.
[298] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.
[299] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.
[300] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.
[301] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?
[302] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Meryl Streep, Zach Alfenakis, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, Davey, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.
[303] Only murders in the building, premieres, August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.
[304] Goodbye.
[305] Okay, this is called When I Found Out My Dad Kidnap People.
[306] Hey, Karen, Georgia, Steven, and Pet Menagerie.
[307] Nice.
[308] I'll try and keep it short.
[309] When I was 11, my dad took me on a trip to Los Angeles.
[310] He was really excited because I was really excited because I got to see my family and never got to go with him before.
[311] He said it was a work trip that he'd make time for me. Oh, thanks, Dad.
[312] I mean, for your fucking family.
[313] What an honor to be paid attention to as well.
[314] My most important thing in my life is work, but I will make time for this less important thing of you, my child.
[315] Listen, block out 7 to 7 .30 for an old daddy -o.
[316] We're going to watch three's company together.
[317] That's right.
[318] You get a fucking TV dinner.
[319] Okay.
[320] One evening at dinner, TV dinner problem, he asked me what I knew about cults.
[321] At 11, my answer was nothing.
[322] My dad proceeded to explain what they were to me and told me the real reason for the trip.
[323] he had been hired by parents to kidnap someone and do a deprogramming job her dad was a deep programmer for cults i had a brief moment of wondering if he had once kidnapped me fair fucking assassin oh my god but suddenly all those warnings about vans and the game where we tailed people at the mall quote to show how easy it was to follow someone unquote made a whole lot more sense oh my god yeah that's why the following game Come on, Daddy wants to play the game where he puts a silencer on a gun.
[324] He liked us to always be prepared and would hide in bushes and jump out and wanted us always to be ready.
[325] This is called child abuse.
[326] Oh, my God, he wonders why I need anti -anxiety medication.
[327] Wait, how he wonders I need anti -anxiety medication is beyond me. Yes.
[328] He would play a game where he would jump out from the bushes so they'd be prepared.
[329] Dad, knock it off.
[330] I bet he was fucking pissed the one time she kicked him in the dick.
[331] That was her preparation.
[332] No, he was because he was wearing a cup and he was like perfect reaction.
[333] Yeah, exactly.
[334] You're my sensei, whatever the fuck.
[335] Yeah.
[336] Okay.
[337] Then, all caps, this Thanksgiving, I found out that my mother was a getaway driver for one of these jobs.
[338] The other getaway driver had to drop out.
[339] The cops were onto him since he had, quote, killed some people since he didn't take shit from anyone.
[340] And then she says, um, what dad?
[341] Apparently, my mom poses a nurse.
[342] and helped kidnap actual doublement twins with my father.
[343] There's a lot left out there.
[344] We've gone off the rails entirely.
[345] Yeah, this chick is like, I'll try to keep it short.
[346] And we're like, can you please write us four more pages of what the fuck is going on?
[347] We need, yeah, you need to write a true novel about what's happening to us.
[348] Turns out they weren't in a cult, but needed to call their dad because he was controlling and was calling deep programmers because they weren't talking to him anymore.
[349] What?
[350] So the twins' father, the twins had stopped talking to their father.
[351] He probably sucked.
[352] So he had started calling deep programmers to be like, my kids are in a cult.
[353] Can you please go kidnap him?
[354] And the kids are like, no, we just hate our fucking controlling shitty dad.
[355] He wants our double mint money.
[356] Yeah, he wants that double mint money.
[357] I wonder if anyone doesn't know what we're talking about.
[358] Double the pleasure.
[359] Double the fun.
[360] That's a great man of the statement.
[361] Double mick gum.
[362] Double minkum.
[363] Okay.
[364] And then we all be twins.
[365] in the commercial that's right okay um because they weren't talking to him anymore luckily they were so mad at their father that they didn't call the police on my parents wow this is the only couple of this is only a couple of wild stories i've learned from my family s so it is true that the dad was a cult deep programmer yes it was just in that one instance it wasn't a cult that they were right they just wanted to get the fuck away from that right yes okay that was your submission for us to give you a book deal and yes our new book imprint is coming out soon we have decided to start a book company and you're our first book there is a a made -for -tTV movie the paul tompkins and i watched one time that is one of my favorite things i've ever seen and it is a the story and it seems to be like a true story based on true story of a guy that ends up joining the Moonies, the cult in San Francisco, and the Moonies were a cult that really like got popular in the 70s.
[366] And what they would do is they would go into San Francisco and they would hold free spaghetti dinners.
[367] And if you were like poor or starving or whatever, you could go.
[368] Or like spaghetti or just fucking loved a nice marinara sauce.
[369] You could go to these dinners.
[370] And then they basically from there, they would do like cult fishing where they would send out like, a hot guy or a hot girl depending on your situation and kind of get somebody to flirt you into like do you want to come back to the thing with that?
[371] You should come at so, it's just we love and we farm and we fucking.
[372] Yeah.
[373] So then you're suddenly weirdly looped into like oh this is, I've got some carbohydrates in my belly and someone's flirting with me and everything sounds so much better than the I like it here.
[374] Yeah.
[375] Yeah.
[376] And then they have them selling flowers on the street and they're slowly indoctrinating in them into the cult.
[377] So this story is about a guy who gets fully into the moonies and he's like completely brainwashed he's doing all this weird stuff and his friend who is a stand -up comedian in this story it's like you know obviously not an exact person I don't think but at one point is hilarious the friend who gets him out of the cult like basically goes into the cult and finds him and gets they they kidnap him and deprogram him is what made me think of it but the friend that's a stand -up comedian when they go to show him at his job at a club he's dressed like a tomato and it's like that alone i was like this is price of admission but then the whole actual story of how they have to hire a person that like they it's it is kidnapping against their will take them and they have to like convince them that they have been but maybe they're not maybe they want to live there maybe they want to fucking live on a farm with hot people instead of having to dress like a fucking tomato to make rent money and then barely which is true except if that the farm life would have been great but they're not that's not where they live they get like basically it turns into slave labor okay and it turns into these people that are like weirdly dedicated they don't sleep and they don't eat that much and they're just out like running around trying to sell flowers in the streets of san francisco but lying in clothes and not a tomato costume that's exactly exactly true.
[378] They're not dressed like vegetables, but all of their hard work goes to the Reverend Moon, who is like a billionaire.
[379] That's why so Moonies from the Reverend Moon.
[380] Yeah, he was in charge.
[381] And that's a real thing.
[382] It's a real thing.
[383] Okay.
[384] And he was like an arms dealer.
[385] He got so rich off of the cult that he was like a real.
[386] It's not, it's Wayne, seriously.
[387] But it's, I should find the name of it.
[388] I'm going to watch it.
[389] I'm going to try to do less, just describing made for TV movies.
[390] Why would you do that?
[391] We have a whole spin -off podcast that we're starting with our book.
[392] With our book imprint.
[393] Book imprint.
[394] And they're going to go together.
[395] They're going to be like companions.
[396] That's a companion piece where someone will tell it too straight from their life.
[397] And then I'll just say, hey, that reminds me of a random thing.
[398] And thank you, Stephen.
[399] this was a 1981 Canadian drama film called Ticket to Heaven.
[400] I really recommend that you watch it.
[401] It's amazing 1981 style entertainment.
[402] Canadian 1981 style entertainment even.
[403] But then you really get to watch somebody get extracted from a cult.
[404] And they had a thing, I don't know if it was all cults like that or if it was just in the Moonies, but they showed you how to kill yourself if you want to do no no no no don't really like cutting your wrist well just that there's a way to do it yeah I know and but then there's a way to cut your wrists where you won't die but you get out of once you get yourself to a hospital you're you can't get re -kidnapped out of the hospital and the monies will come and get you to get yourself out of like your parents house essentially or the family or wherever you've been kidnapped to like they know that people are going to do that and they basically tell you attempt suicide so you can get out of there and we come take you back don't do if someone's telling you attempt suicide as the solution even if they know you're not getting killed you're in a cult you pause and get your hands on some protein yeah because it's a big thing where they keep you awake and they feed you a sugar loaf constantly you must demand soy just eat a fucking a chicken uh come try this chicken what was it oh my god come have chicken have chicken and that is a full fucking sir he was trying to get her out of a cult yes he's the chicken deep programmer dude this fucking goes all the way to the top this goes straight to the bungalow at this is a fucking composting toilet of truth los angeles you guys kicked ass with your hometown yeah thanks guys those were all fascinating there are celebrity references yeah that's all we care about.
[405] That's all we care about.
[406] Send yours, your weird family stories to my favorite murder at Gmail.
[407] And thanks for listening.
[408] Yeah, and stay sexy.
[409] And don't get murdered.
[410] A goodbye.
[411] Good bye.
[412] Elvis?
[413] Want cookie?
[414] Whoa.
[415] Bye