Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend XX
[0] Hi, my name is Amy Mann.
[1] I feel apprehensive about being Conan O 'Brien's friend.
[2] I think that's fair.
[3] I'm a lot to take on.
[4] Fall is here, hear the yell, back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walking loose, climb the fence, books and pens.
[5] I can tell that we are going to be friends.
[6] I can tell that we are going to need friends Hello there and welcome to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend Got a terrific episode today, very happy about it And of course, joined as always by wonderful combo of Sonomov Sessian and Matt Gourley It's nice.
[7] Thanks, guys, I've been wondering lately, tell me if I'm wrong, but I listen to The Daily a lot, you know the New York Times with Michael Barbaro And there are times, you know about this, Matt, but it's a suspicion.
[8] I'm a big fan of the daily, and it's like a regular part of my day.
[9] And there are times where I swear to God, I listen to it, and I think that it's possible that they get someone talking for a while, and then afterwards in audio, they just have Michael Barbaro go, uh -huh.
[10] They have a bank.
[11] They have a bank, and it occurs me. And then basically he, they have him recap.
[12] So what happens is they get the person talking for a while and he basically says there was this, apparently this woman named Goldilocks who went in and there were three bowls of porridge and there was one that was too hot and there was one that was too cold, but then there was one that was just right.
[13] So what you're saying is that this young girl, Goldilocks, went into a house, a house that she had not been in before, and there were three bowls of porridge, one too hot, one too cold, and one just right.
[14] And which one did she choose?
[15] Well, good question.
[16] She chose the one that was just right.
[17] Ah, mm -hmm, yeah.
[18] Then she went into the next room and there was a bed.
[19] There were three beds.
[20] One was too firm, one was too soft, and one was just right.
[21] So what you're saying is that then she went to another room and there were three beds.
[22] One was too hard, one was too soft and one was just right.
[23] Did she choose one of those beds?
[24] She did.
[25] Very good question.
[26] And it was the one that was just right.
[27] At any point, let me ask, did the bears come home?
[28] They did.
[29] They actually did come home.
[30] And that's what I was going to get to next.
[31] The three bears came home and they found Goldilocks asleep in the bed.
[32] So what you're saying is that Goldilocks fell asleep in the bed and the three bears came in.
[33] And they encountered Goldilocks.
[34] What happened then?
[35] Excellent question.
[36] They awoke Goldilocks.
[37] She was surprised and she ran out the door and she was never heard from again.
[38] Incredible.
[39] Okay, here's what else you need to know today.
[40] In Canada, a large fat of syrup exploded, flooding Oregon.
[41] We go now.
[42] I believe that's the general thing, and I'm feeling like I could, I swear to God, I don't need to be here with the guests anymore.
[43] As much as I love it, I feel like I could be, you could let them just babble and then send me little prompt questions, and I can finally live out my dream of living in one of those little ice fishing shacks, you know, where they cut a hole in the ice.
[44] And I live there all alone, and I grow just a crazy beard.
[45] Do you know how to fish?
[46] No, and I don't even like fishing, and I don't like the cold.
[47] But it's an image that I like.
[48] And that's what I'm going to do.
[49] And then every now and then I'm going to get on the phone.
[50] And Matt's going to say, all right, all you have to do is ask these three questions about Goldilocks.
[51] And you're off the hook.
[52] So what you're saying is that this bear, this blue bear, which is quite unusual, we start out in Canada.
[53] and then came down to Oregon.
[54] What does this mean?
[55] And then the person goes on and says, and the hammerhead sharks attacked the supermodels.
[56] Is that what you're saying?
[57] Are you talking like Michael Barbaro now, too?
[58] I'm channeling, I'm channeling him a little bit.
[59] You know, he has that way.
[60] Here's what you need to know today.
[61] And then he goes, here's what to know today.
[62] But he puts in eight seconds.
[63] Yes.
[64] Yeah.
[65] No, I've actually, I have a game where when Michael Barbaro does the introduction, I try to see if I can.
[66] make a tuna melt during the gap.
[67] So he goes, I'm like a babaro, daily.
[68] And here's, and I try, I quickly run.
[69] And I get rye bread, I put it in the toaster.
[70] And you know, I won't take you through the whole thing.
[71] But I've made most of a sandwich.
[72] And sometimes I've made the whole sandwich and eat in half of it before he says, you know what you need to know today, that's good.
[73] You could probably make up, Matt, a bunch of things, audio cues, that you play almost like on a keyboard.
[74] And we could do a podcast where I'm just reacting.
[75] And I know you, I know you, you're going to sometimes screw me over because someone's going to say, yeah, it was really tough because that was the year I lost my father.
[76] Yeah.
[77] I think you should record a bunch of stuff you say often.
[78] Yeah, when I was at Saturday Night Live, or, well, I'm like Picasso, and, you know, you don't tell Michelangelo how to paint.
[79] Look at this body, yeah.
[80] Look at this body.
[81] Or, yeah.
[82] When I say, look at this body, it's usually with fear and sadness.
[83] It's a threat.
[84] Yeah, it's more like, if you don't behave, I'm going to take off my shirt, and then you're really going to see what 80 -year -old spam looks like.
[85] It's fresh out of the can.
[86] My father just passed away.
[87] Look at this body.
[88] I guess what I'm trying to say, is that listening to The Daily gave me this idea that we could probably I could spend a day one full day giving you every single conanism and every single human reaction and then God forbid something ever happens to me this podcast goes on in perpetuity.
[89] You sit there at a synthesizer and you just play or not even something happens to me I just become incredibly lazy and a hermit.
[90] So you just sit there, Matt, and they're like, when you have another episode, you know, who's on, who's on this time?
[91] Well, it's Marissa Tomei.
[92] Okay, get Marissa Tomei in a room and have her tell five stories, and you're just sitting there and you're playing like, mm -hmm, oh, I see.
[93] Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, murderer, corn, corncob soup.
[94] I'm Picasso.
[95] Look at my body.
[96] I used to work on Saturday Night Live.
[97] Cockaroo.
[98] A cockaroo.
[99] I could do that now.
[100] I could just take those sound bites from previous podcasts.
[101] You could, but I want it to be a whole day in the studio.
[102] I want it to cost a lot of money.
[103] I want it directed by a famous director.
[104] Oh, really?
[105] What are you thinking?
[106] I don't know, your Cameron's.
[107] Kirk Cameron?
[108] Yeah, Kirk Cameron.
[109] I want him to direct it.
[110] And also be my religious director.
[111] No, I don't know.
[112] I don't know what I'm saying.
[113] but um i think we could work that up i think we can make a whole podcast with you just never saying anything yeah i think that that's a goal we should strive for anyway think about this just uh and and then we could i think start cranking out hundreds of episodes a week that's another bonus i can't but then i have to edit all that and put that all together what are you doing picking out a whatever new weird chotchkey to have in the background of your zoom shot okay so up with camel no one has a bigger collection of straw hats from the turn of the century than Mike, than Matthew Gorley.
[114] Mike?
[115] Who's Mike?
[116] He's the guy going to replace you with.
[117] He's really great.
[118] We have one more meeting with him, Sax and I, and then he's on board.
[119] He's fantastic.
[120] I wish him well.
[121] Yeah, Mike Gallaginski, fantastic guy.
[122] All right.
[123] Gallaginski.
[124] Yeah, he's wonderful.
[125] Anyway, we'll hit you with that next week.
[126] All right.
[127] My guest today is a Grammy.
[128] Award -winning singer -songwriter who has released more than a dozen albums over the last four decades.
[129] Her latest album, Queens of the Summer Hotel, is available now.
[130] I am thrilled.
[131] She is with us today.
[132] Amy Mann.
[133] There's a lot of factors to you.
[134] I mean, just leaving out.
[135] What do you mean?
[136] There's a lot of factors.
[137] Leaving out the fact that you just said that you longed to do an interview where you really tear somebody apart, where you really hold their...
[138] We did that off mic, and I said, I would like to, my fantasy is to really go after someone who people like.
[139] And I think of you as someone who is very much liked.
[140] So I was thinking, wouldn't it be funny if I just had all these facts and figures at my disposal?
[141] And it was like a 60 minutes takedown of Amy Mann.
[142] And people listening are like, what was that all about?
[143] But I contend that I'm not universally liked enough for that to have that kind of impact.
[144] Although I do applaud the impulse.
[145] But, I mean, I think you're talking about a Tom Hanks, right?
[146] Like, that's, you've got to go right to the top.
[147] Well, I actually have real dirt.
[148] I have real dirt on Tom Hanks, which I can't get into.
[149] He didn't pay his taxes from 1997 to 2006.
[150] I know that for a fact.
[151] That's a long stretch.
[152] Yeah.
[153] And he's a big MAGA guy.
[154] He also, he refuses to recycle.
[155] He hates dogs.
[156] I know that for a fact.
[157] He hates dogs.
[158] despises dogs.
[159] I think of us as friendly because I've known you a long time.
[160] You would always came on the late night show and shows that followed that many times.
[161] You're always really nice to me, and I'm a big admirer of yours.
[162] And then I got to know you and I think, Michael, pretty well.
[163] You'd come over to my house.
[164] I have the occasional shindig, can we call it?
[165] Yeah.
[166] Hoot Nanny?
[167] Blow out.
[168] Blow out.
[169] I call it a rave We're a blowout Occasionally I have We're very blowout people Yeah And you're always like Woo And you'd bring glow sticks This is a whole side of Amy man That no one knows Cat and the Hat hat hat You have a giant cat in the hat hat You've always done a lot of Molly You're always I'm always rolling You're always rolling And you stay to like six in the morning And then make a whole bunch of waffles Nobody wants You're a mess Oh, those waffles sounds good, though.
[170] That last part sounds kind of like now I want to have me at my party.
[171] Well, I am, there's a lot to talk about here because, like many comedians, I'm fascinated by music.
[172] The grass is always greener.
[173] I'm close to that, although I know enough to know.
[174] Listen, I don't want to go on the road and stay in one of those weird comedy club condos.
[175] Like, I know enough about it to know that it's probably grim.
[176] Also, I get to travel with people.
[177] I can't imagine that it's very fun to be a comic on the road alone.
[178] Yeah, that seems crazy and...
[179] And depressing.
[180] Yeah, and depressing.
[181] But I think it's fun when you're young...
[182] Yeah, if you're a male and you really like...
[183] If you're really into waitresses, it's probably awesome.
[184] We just described me in the 80s to a T. although I wasn't touring.
[185] I was just going to restaurants and trying to chat up latraces.
[186] And it went nowhere.
[187] Just leaving really good tips in the hopes.
[188] Yeah, and then I...
[189] My move was to leave a really good tip and then go outside and peer in through the window of the Denny's to see them get the tip and think maybe they'll just look out the window and see me looking back in.
[190] Well, you write your name and phone number on the bills.
[191] Oh, damn it.
[192] I didn't do that part.
[193] I mean, that's everybody knows that.
[194] Oh, damn it.
[195] I wrote my major in college on it.
[196] What was your major in college?
[197] History and Literature of America, specializing in the literature of the South.
[198] I would write that no waitress ever called me. Of course, they didn't have my number.
[199] I didn't leave that.
[200] I did leave my Social Security number.
[201] Listen, I really screwed up with being single.
[202] It was a big mess.
[203] You blew it.
[204] You had a lot of opportunities at Denny's.
[205] You know, I probably did.
[206] Denny's, your occasional sizzler, where I would wipe off my own tray.
[207] Oh, Beck Steakhouse?
[208] I used to take women on dates to restaurants where you had to pick up a tray.
[209] Oh, no. I ended up marrying a tray is very robustly.
[210] I got you your tray.
[211] Now you hold your tray and I'll hold my tray.
[212] But let's talk about this crazy.
[213] Music versus comedies.
[214] Yeah, in the eternal Marvel DC struggle between music and comedy because...
[215] What is it about music that you are particularly fascinated?
[216] by, I mean, is it just sort of like a kid's version of it looks cool to be on stage and, you know, sweating and having, you know, people try to touch the hem of your garment?
[217] Yes, but I've had that, please.
[218] Yeah, people want to touch the hem of your garment very often.
[219] Yeah, many years I performed comedy dressed as Jesus and it was a big success.
[220] But, no, I guess, okay, I'll tell you exactly.
[221] First of all, We have to break this down into categories.
[222] One is songwriting.
[223] And I've talked to you about this at parties at my house, where I have cornered you and tried to talk to you about songwriting.
[224] I've even talked to you on my show.
[225] I remember you on the late night show once, and I was telling you afterwards how much I envied that you could write a song.
[226] And you very kindly said to me, this is just as we were wrapping up the show.
[227] And she said, well, I'll write a song with you.
[228] and I thought, well, that's not going to happen, and I would be completely useless to you.
[229] I would interfere with your process.
[230] Well, obviously you brought a guitar today so we could write a song on the podcast.
[231] I did not.
[232] I did not.
[233] How is that possible?
[234] Because, well, I think it's because...
[235] Are we going to have to do an ancillary B -roll podcast at your house?
[236] Yeah.
[237] Well, I would do a second.
[238] I would do a one that we sort of edit down.
[239] Oh, I'm totally game.
[240] We could do that.
[241] Totally game for this, by the way.
[242] Okay, all right.
[243] I did not, first of all, I think if I had showed up today with a guitar, I'd have felt like an asshole.
[244] Yeah.
[245] Because I don't think that would be fair to you.
[246] No, you said one time at a party.
[247] I know.
[248] You said we were going to write a song.
[249] So look what I brought.
[250] I brought a telecaster and it's already plugged in to this really cool amp.
[251] And you're going to make a song with me right now.
[252] No, I don't, that is, by the way, my singing voice.
[253] It's got a very interesting timbre.
[254] Have you tried to write songs?
[255] I've never tried to write a song.
[256] Not even like...
[257] I have to say that I remembered as a young man when I was playing the guitar and learning it, I was obsessed with writing a song and it was always the same chord progression.
[258] It was E, then it would go to F sharp minor, then it would go to A. And it kept sounding like every Lou Reed song you've ever heard.
[259] I mean, that's probably accurate.
[260] Yes.
[261] And I'm telling anyone out there who doubts me, you just sort of muffled the strum a little bit and you go E, E, E, E, E, E, E, A minor, F sharp minor, and then you go to A, A, A, A, A, and it was just like, it's like, yes, this song, this is going to get me laid.
[262] This is, I'm going to be, yeah, this song is giving me dark and interesting.
[263] Dark and interesting, because those are dark and interesting.
[264] That's a dark, interesting progression.
[265] I'm going to seem brooding.
[266] I'm going to seem like I have a problem that only you, my darling, sweet, lovely lady, can fix.
[267] Yes.
[268] Yeah.
[269] No one else understands me, but the woman I'm singing, the waitress at Denny's, I'm singing this to right now.
[270] So it is a mystery to me songwriting, but I will tell you the one thing that I think really fascinates anyone in comedy is that there is a, and you will probably disagree with me, but from our perspective, people on this comedy side, there's a lack of judgment.
[271] Now, yes, there's, I'm sure there's all these horror stories you could tell me of working your way up and you're in.
[272] Boston and you're playing these credit clubs and people are throwing cod at each other in the audience and you're trying to.
[273] That's what we do in Boston.
[274] Trust me, I know.
[275] We're going to have a card fight.
[276] Everyone tossing cod at each other while you're trying to scrod.
[277] It's scrod.
[278] It's scrod.
[279] Scrod, cod.
[280] You know, exactly.
[281] You got any scrot.
[282] But I understand that.
[283] But at a certain point, everyone shuts up when you start to play your song.
[284] Not always.
[285] When was the last time people talked as you were performing, Amy Mann.
[286] I mean, listen, if you were playing a bar in Chicago...
[287] Yes.
[288] Look, I love Chicago, but it is the chatty -a -city.
[289] Yeah, and they're not throwing scrods.
[290] They're throwing various types of sausage, spice sauce.
[291] That's very deep -dish pizza.
[292] Deep -dish pizza flying around, which can really...
[293] When you're hit with, you know, thin crust, do you get hit?
[294] Nothing, not a problem.
[295] You get hit with deep dish, and you're in terrible, terrible trouble.
[296] I was thinking about you today before this interview, and I was thinking, I know for a fact that your independence and your, I think, confidence was probably hard won because of the way you grew up.
[297] You don't sound like someone who had the most cheerful childhood.
[298] No, it's not cheerful.
[299] Well, first of all, there's just the crazy story, which I've known for a while, but the crazy story of you more or less being kidnapped when you're three years old.
[300] Yeah, I was one of those, you know, my parents split up.
[301] My mother, everyone's gone now so I can, you know, talk about it.
[302] But my mother had had an affair with this guy and I think got pregnant by him.
[303] And they decided that they would run off together because he was married and he had some, he had kids.
[304] And he knew in 1963 nobody's giving him custody of his kids.
[305] So, you know, they hatched this plan to take his kids and take me. And not my brother.
[306] I don't know why.
[307] I think my brother is probably a little too old.
[308] You know, I was like a very...
[309] I think you were three, weren't you?
[310] I was, I was three.
[311] He was, he was five, but he was like a very smart and aware five and also a five that would like call stuff out where I was a very acquiescent, you know, very easily controlled three.
[312] And they took all these kids and ran off and this, you know, and she was pregnant or she had just had a baby.
[313] And they ran off to Europe.
[314] They fled the country.
[315] Yeah.
[316] Yeah, they went to Europe because I remember being in Amsterdam and I remember being in Germany and we landed in London or the outskirts of London and that's where we were found.
[317] And you were found because your dad hired a private detective to track you down.
[318] He and this guy's wife hired a private detective and so, you know, we're kind of trading tips and, you know, trying to track everybody down.
[319] and he actually found him by accident because he was having, he was in advertising and this guy had worked for him just to make everything more.
[320] So not the perfect crime.
[321] Yeah, just more.
[322] Wait, I know this guy.
[323] Yeah.
[324] So he was having lunch with, you know, somebody else in the advertising business who was from New York, I think.
[325] And the guy was like, oh, I ran into somebody who used to work for you, this, you know, and said his name.
[326] And my father was like, oh.
[327] really?
[328] Where was he?
[329] Where is he living?
[330] And that's how he tracked him down.
[331] Wow.
[332] Okay.
[333] So then you're brought back and you're growing up in the South.
[334] Yeah.
[335] Whereabouts in the South?
[336] Richmond.
[337] Yeah, Richmond, Virginia.
[338] And you described this thing that makes sense to me, which is that being a woman growing up in the 60s, 70s was not a piece of cake.
[339] The kind of cliche thing of telling your kids, you know, or you know, your daughters like you can be anything you want like that that was exactly the opposite of my experience i mean it was like just understood that women were dumber and that women couldn't do stuff but also that i don't know it there was kind of this atmosphere that if you wanted to do something that women didn't usually do you were literally going against nature and it was like almost a crime against nature if you you know if you want i mean like literally i wanted to play the bass and you know it and your Family, when you said, I want to play the base, their reaction was.
[340] Oh, they laughed at me. Like, it was just, like, hilarious laughter at the very idea that, I mean, I can't even come up with an analog today because, you know, I mean, women do, like, they're in the army, they're doctors, but it just, it was so outlandish.
[341] I mean, it was considered so outlandish.
[342] Well, when the talking heads came along in the late 70s and 80s, it was, oh, look, the base player is a woman.
[343] Yeah.
[344] And it almost felt like a novelty.
[345] which now is insulting, but I remembered my mother if one of my sisters was chewing gum.
[346] She'd be like, take that gum out of your mouth.
[347] You're chewing gum.
[348] And the implication is always like you're making yourself unattractive so that you won't get a husband.
[349] Like I was actually told, like, you'll never get a boyfriend.
[350] Like nobody will ever want to marry you because you're, you know, because my antics, you know, like, I guess was, we're making me so unattractive.
[351] You know, and you're like, I'm 12, you know, like I'm 12 and I like football.
[352] Like, what's the problem?
[353] Right.
[354] And also, we don't need to marry me off just yet.
[355] This is in 1851.
[356] Yeah, but it's...
[357] You're 12.
[358] It's time to have a child.
[359] But you have to be trained, Conan, into, you know, into your job is to be attractive at all times.
[360] Well, that's, I mean, but I remember noticing, wait a minute, my mother doesn't care if I chew gum.
[361] She doesn't care if I...
[362] Boy, that really is a, I mean...
[363] She had a different standard.
[364] Gum chewing, that it's down to gum chewing.
[365] Yeah, and this was, and keep in mind, this is an ancient history.
[366] This is the 19, this is like 1983.
[367] Why are you chewing gum?
[368] Get that gum out of your mouth.
[369] Meanwhile, my brothers and I are in the backyard, you know, are in the backyard shoving dirt in our mouths and swallowing it.
[370] We're just animal.
[371] We're like wild apes.
[372] And she's like, well, those boys, what can be done?
[373] Now listen to me. What can be done?
[374] Well, it's out of my hands.
[375] I have a very clear memory of the first time that you were introduced to me as a musical artist I know that you would spend a lot of time in Boston because you'd gone to Berkeley and you got involved in the music scene in Boston.
[376] Yeah.
[377] And you were with a punk band for a while that was called The Young Snakes.
[378] The Young Snakes.
[379] Kind of like an art, rock, noisy.
[380] Right.
[381] And one of the things I remember was, I heard once, I don't know if this is true, that they, you would sort of start to try and write songs.
[382] And they were mad about anything that sounded slightly melodic.
[383] Yeah.
[384] I felt that there was definitely, you know, in this sort of punk new way of scene, that anything melodic or anything that was like a love song was definitely, like that was out.
[385] Right.
[386] You know, like I was band who I was friends with one of their songs was the lyrics were a recipe for shrimp flambay.
[387] You know, it was all like all like just weird, whatever the weirdest kind of.
[388] Was it accurate?
[389] If you listen to the whole song, did you actually get a good recipe for shrimp flambay?
[390] That's a great question.
[391] Did they follow the recipe exactly?
[392] Then simmer!
[393] And simmer for 15 minutes, don't let it brown.
[394] I mean, that's very useful, right?
[395] Like a whole, you mix the cooking show and music into one new genre.
[396] I used to do this performance around Sarnat Live, just for writers, but I used to do, what if Led Zeppelin had gotten into a period of their career where the songs were really just about useful tips for staying healthy.
[397] Then I would do rubber plant like, you know, chew thoroughly.
[398] Before swallowing helps you.
[399] with digestion and people I just love the idea of a hard rock band that was trying to tell you sleep's important try to get eight hours nine if you can but still the same sound yeah yeah same heavy sounds same you know John Bonham drums same cool rock parts and then everything is some sun is good in moderation probably good to put on you know sunscreen when you go outside Then you get into that schoolhouse rock stuff, right?
[400] Yeah, exactly.
[401] And all of that's, those songs were fantastic.
[402] Great songs.
[403] Great songs.
[404] I mean, and also it's still how I understand how our legislative process works is I play over how a bill becomes a bill on Capitol Hill.
[405] That's amazing.
[406] That's amazing.
[407] Yeah, it is a great song.
[408] But I still, to this day, we'll be reading the New York Times and they'll be saying, yeah, you know, mansions and Emma, they may. And I'm like, okay, yeah, hold on a second.
[409] Let me see if I can follow this.
[410] And I go back to Schoolhouse Rock.
[411] And I'm like, I got this.
[412] I understand exactly what's happening.
[413] Let me get back to the bridge and then I'll understand.
[414] But I find it terrifying because now we are able to listen to early versions of songs from just about any, like, so you can hear the demo for a song the Beatles do on the white album.
[415] You can hear the demo.
[416] And I think, how did you ever get from that point to the song being the song?
[417] Part of the answer, though, to that Conan is that McCartney is a fucking savant.
[418] And he obviously can hear all the arrangements in his head, all the different instruments, all playing at once.
[419] He can hear it.
[420] That's why he's always a little surprised that, like, George isn't hearing it.
[421] Like, you know, George is a great guitar player who has to work out some parts and try some stuff and live with it.
[422] And, like, no, that doesn't work.
[423] And, you know, which is like what most mortals do.
[424] But he can just hear it.
[425] I think he's going to go places.
[426] He's going to work out for that young man. And you can see, too, like, how he's translated.
[427] every experience into music at all times.
[428] Right.
[429] This is savagely name -droppy and awful, and I apologize for that, but let's just, all I can say is that I was allowed to attend a party once, and Paul McCartney was there, and it was a dinner party, and as the party's breaking up, I walk into the next room and he's picked up a guitar, and he's playing it, and he's not doing it like, hey, look at me, I'm Paul McCartney, I'm playing the guitar.
[430] He's doing it the way someone who kind of likes the guitar would pick up a guitar.
[431] The interesting thing is it is a right -handed guitar and he's famously left -handed.
[432] So he's playing it upside down and sideway.
[433] He's playing it, but he's playing it correctly.
[434] He's making it work.
[435] And I just said, you know, I said, I don't understand how you're able to play.
[436] I know you're left -handed.
[437] I don't understand how you're able to play that when he went, well, you know, I had to swap a guitar, you know, I'd swap off back and forth with John.
[438] And if I had re -strung John's guitar, he had a crippled me. That's what he said.
[439] If I'd restrung John's guitar, he'd a crippled me. So I had to figure out how to play it that way.
[440] And he's got that way of making, even when he speaks, it's kind of musical.
[441] And it's a song in itself.
[442] And I'm just telling you how to go, just take a left and then take a right and pass the pizza shop and you'll get there.
[443] And you're like, wow, that's a song.
[444] You just told me how to get to the pizza shop.
[445] I mean, that's all he has to do is drop John in.
[446] Like someone can say, these baked potatoes, Paul, are really good.
[447] How'd you make them?
[448] I remember John told me once, oh, my God, where do you tell you, I'll just put foil around him and it keeps the skins nice and crisp?
[449] Everything becomes a legend.
[450] Everything becomes a legend.
[451] My iPhone, I didn't bring the chord, but it's the new kind of receptor for the chord.
[452] It's the universal.
[453] It's not the other.
[454] I remember John won't sing.
[455] With an iPhone, you've got to have the right cord.
[456] I don't think John.
[457] Oh, he did.
[458] He told me. He'd crippled me if I took his iPhone cord.
[459] You know, we're talking about the Beatles, but I feel when I listen to your music, I'm aware that.
[460] that you've made a million decisions in the studio, they sound like all the right decisions to me, and I don't know how that happens.
[461] You know, you hire the right musicians that you know are going to play tasteful stuff, and then they'll play something.
[462] You go, oh, keep that.
[463] Were I a musician and a recording artist, my one move would be, let's get strings in here.
[464] I would put strings on everything.
[465] Yeah.
[466] the London Philharmonic.
[467] Well, when we record the song that we write together.
[468] We should do that, yeah.
[469] We can do an orchestral arrangement.
[470] And just bring in giant strings.
[471] No, I'm serious.
[472] Schedule me in.
[473] I will do this.
[474] You and I are going to write a song together.
[475] It's going to get nasty when we work out the publishing.
[476] That's when you're going to...
[477] You're famously argumentative.
[478] I'm saying, you know...
[479] A parsinomious.
[480] I'm going to be like, wait a minute, Conan, I'm Amy Mann.
[481] I've been doing this a long time and I'm quite acclaimed.
[482] No, it's O 'Brien Man and I get 70%.
[483] I also get all the merch.
[484] Get all the merch.
[485] They want the merch.
[486] Our two heads on a t -shirt.
[487] But I remember that first hit, Voices Carrie, my sister Kate, who I think really did feel like she was under the yoke of this.
[488] And again, I'll repeat, my, I had lovely.
[489] parents, they're fantastic people, and I love them very much, but they came from a different world.
[490] And so your song came along with the video, and my sister Kate was just transfixed because it was all about, you know, Voices Carey is all about keep your voice down, let me control you.
[491] And it was she, that song was like a liberation song for her, you know, which was really great.
[492] Well, that's fantastic.
[493] That's a really nice thing.
[494] Yeah.
[495] You know, I didn't, I mean, I have to say, I didn't even write it for that, but...
[496] You didn't write it for my sister?
[497] No, I mean, I didn't write it, like, as, you know, necessarily a feminist anthem.
[498] Right.
[499] You know, I think that when it came time to make the video, that kind of, that sort of idea was in the air.
[500] I mean, it's, like, very, very heavy -handed and, you know, kind of ridiculous.
[501] I don't know.
[502] The director cast him, and when I saw him, I was like, oh, come on.
[503] Like, how did you, like, give me some credit.
[504] Like, I mean, I'm not going to go out with this muscle -bound.
[505] Right.
[506] You know, it's so funny because I was watching the video again today, you know, in preparation for this interview, I just was like checking out a lot of stuff.
[507] And I went back and I looked at that video and this guy is over the top.
[508] Like you're thinking, why would Amy for a second be with this guy who's...
[509] And I encourage you to, the guy is just like, what are you doing?
[510] Why is you a hell?
[511] I know, he's like such a mustache twirling.
[512] Yeah, mustache trilling bad guy.
[513] He practically ties you to a train track.
[514] But what's really funny.
[515] is the first comment that I saw on the internet was this guy had one job.
[516] It was to be an asshole and he nailed it.
[517] But putting in his song, I mean, I think that's sort of case and point of voices carry is, you know, I wrote it about a friend of mine, a male friend of mine who's talking about a relationship he had where the girl didn't want to be affectionate with him in public, like made him, you know, like don't, you know, keep your voice down.
[518] Don't tell people we're going out.
[519] And, but I think the reason I related to that story was probably my, my history.
[520] So, you know, you can put stuff in a song that, you know, you can disguise, you can have a metaphor that maybe is a little oblique that people might get or might not get, but you can say what you fucking think and feel.
[521] Yeah.
[522] You know, and I think that if, if you grow up in a way where you're able to say what you think and feel, you don't necessarily need that.
[523] I mean, I wonder if that's what, if I would have been, if I would have gravitated towards that so much if I, you know, felt like I had parents I could talk to.
[524] Right.
[525] Now, of course, people will want to know when you had success, did your parents change their minds?
[526] Did they say, did they come around?
[527] And is that satisfying?
[528] Or is it not cure the fact that they laughed at you when you said you wanted to play bass?
[529] I think that my, I had grown up with a stepmother.
[530] My real mother, you know, once I was brought, But back, I didn't see her again until I was an adult.
[531] My stepmother was really the one who was really, you know, the don't chew gum model.
[532] And I think that she really was very excited that I was getting famous and wanted to be around that a lot.
[533] And that was uncomfortable.
[534] So, you know, she wanted to take credit for it.
[535] So she would tell people how she started me out, you know.
[536] Really?
[537] Yeah.
[538] There was a lot of that.
[539] Wow.
[540] Revisionous history.
[541] So that was kind of uncomfortable, yeah.
[542] Yeah.
[543] My father, I feel like, my father was just very disengaged from the family.
[544] And I never felt like he, you know, was necessarily judgmental of me. You know, he sort of accepted me. But at the same time, like, you know, my stepmother really ran the show.
[545] So, you know, you can't do that because your girl stuff was really just percolated in the family.
[546] Because I had three brothers.
[547] So, you know, you have three.
[548] brothers and you have somebody who's told they can't do a thing, then that person becomes the scapegoat, you know, of the family like, ha, ha, you can't do it and we can, you know, because kids always like to have somebody who's, you know, they can step on, I guess.
[549] Humans do.
[550] I mean, I've heard about families where the siblings are, you know, support each other, but like I literally can't imagine.
[551] Yeah, and then there's like the secret tools that you don't really know you have that sort of you realize later.
[552] And I think for me, one of those was that.
[553] I'm very persistent, you know.
[554] I'm quietly persistent, if not stubborn.
[555] And, you know, there's just some things like, I don't know, like starting my own label and getting off major labels and stuff.
[556] I just, you know, I mean.
[557] Which you did.
[558] I mean, now that feels very common today, but when you started doing it, it was not common.
[559] Yeah.
[560] When I, at that point, it was really, you were on a major label or use it or nothing, you know.
[561] Right.
[562] And, you know, the internet had just kind of sprouted up.
[563] a little bit so that you could go to a website and then, you know, order a record by phone.
[564] You're like, I don't even think you could have ordered it online the way you...
[565] I love that you, the internet was you're still on the phone with the same guy at the record store.
[566] It's exactly right, yeah.
[567] What do you want?
[568] Okay.
[569] That was the early internet that people don't understand.
[570] Write this post, you know, send a self -addressed stamped envelope to this post office box.
[571] Yeah, I love that.
[572] So, but that was what?
[573] early 2000 that's yeah 2019 1999 2000 yeah yeah and you know but that's also I mean it's like once again that kind of stems from dysfunction like I don't I don't trust anybody I'm sick of it like fuck you I'm going to do it myself it takes what it takes but I think also quite persistence is a quality people don't talk about a lot as part of the creative process and I think it's a huge part of the creative process yeah people think a lot of it is inspiration and I think inspiration's fine.
[574] It's almost none of it, like 5%.
[575] I mean, great if you, you know, if you're walking along and you suddenly have an idea, a song pops into your head, or one of those people who are like, I had a dream and then I woke up and wrote it down.
[576] Fuck you, Paul McCartney, like, you know, must be nice.
[577] I guess occasionally that happens, but for me, it's really about like just pick up the guitar and do, you know, and just keep at it.
[578] Yeah, put in some hours, you know, play this, play that, imitate a song, play the chord progression from this other song and see as an exercise to see if an alternate melody occurs to, you know, like whatever, just, you know, keep out on it.
[579] You just reminded me of I talked to Elvis Costello on this podcast fairly recently, and I didn't get to talk to him about this on the podcast, but he did a really lovely thing, which is, you know, there's this new star, I guess she was a Disney star, and then she came out with this album, Olivia Rodrigo, and she came out with this album.
[580] album, and it was this big hit and got a lot of attention.
[581] And of course, immediately people came out of the woodwork and said, well, this song sounds a lot like that song from 10 years ago.
[582] And this, you know, she's almost like she's ripping people off.
[583] And I thought people were giving her a hard time about one of her songs, which they said, this just sounds like a rip off of Elvis Costello, some Elvis Costello song.
[584] And he immediately went online and said, what are you talking about?
[585] I got that song because I was thinking about this other song that was famous.
[586] And that's where that song came from, he said, we all are constantly listening to what came before us and reinventing it and trying to make new magic.
[587] And I thought that was really lovely.
[588] That's very generous.
[589] It's very generous because I think we're, you know, in this age now where everyone can access a song immediately and it's become kind of invoked to say, hey, wait a minute, you ripped off X, Y, and Z. Yeah.
[590] This one part sounds a lot like and, you know, you think.
[591] Yeah, there's always going to be, you're going to stumble across, like, you know, a couple of notes that sound, that remind you another thing.
[592] And, you know, and I'm sure I've done that, but, I mean, sometimes it's deliberate because you want the flavor of that quote in there, you know?
[593] Right.
[594] I mean, Elvis is another savant, right?
[595] Like, he's unbelievable.
[596] He's unbelievable.
[597] I've never seen a person with so much going on and so much, so much energy to, and so many ideas.
[598] I mean, I think he is kind of like pure inspiration.
[599] Yeah.
[600] He's also, what I find helps me a lot as a song with a lot of changes that It'd come pretty quickly.
[601] Some of my fascination with guitar is just that it keeps my hands busy.
[602] Yeah.
[603] It's doing something that's calming me down.
[604] Yeah, and I think music, you know, is kind of an organized chaos, right?
[605] It's the organization of chaos.
[606] Like, it's probably the perfect thing for, yeah, for your restless hands.
[607] Yeah.
[608] Well, there you go.
[609] There you go.
[610] Which is the title of our new record.
[611] So we're going to do this.
[612] We're going to make...
[613] We're going to make a song together and we're going to get it out there.
[614] But I...
[615] Yeah, this is our pledge to your listening audience.
[616] Yeah.
[617] So now we have to release it.
[618] Yes.
[619] This song is going to have...
[620] Michael will record it for us because he's already made that offer.
[621] He's brilliant.
[622] He's a great producer.
[623] I mean, he's one of those guys who's like, I can play anything.
[624] Which is frustrated.
[625] I can also engineer and produce.
[626] So I don't need anybody else.
[627] So this is one of my favorite moments that embarrasses me in hindsight, but cornering you and Michael Penn in getting you guys cornered and saying, hey, guys, isn't the bridge to I can see clearly now really strange?
[628] And you guys were like, huh, we haven't really thought about it.
[629] I'm like, but check it out.
[630] So this is the song and it's pretty normal.
[631] But then you get to the bridge and I was trying to figure it out.
[632] And you guys were being so sweet.
[633] You're listening to me and I'm showing you.
[634] But then it goes to E minor, but then it goes to this, but then it goes to that.
[635] but why would it go to this and go to that?
[636] And you guys were like, that's great.
[637] Merry Christmas.
[638] No, you were very sweet about it, but I, afterwards I said, oh, I can't believe.
[639] Are they carving the roast beef in the next room?
[640] Is there a ham in that room?
[641] Oh, yeah, it's ham.
[642] But I remember just, I remember just afterwards talking out loud, like lying in bed going, I cornered these two musical savants and told him that I had figured out the bridge to I can see clearly now.
[643] Well, what's funny about that is like, My experience of it is like, oh, my God, what am I as dumb dumb that I can't remember that bridge?
[644] Like, I could not, I couldn't even remember it.
[645] I could say, like, look all around, there's nothing but blue skies.
[646] Yeah.
[647] That's probably why, because it's sort of an anomaly.
[648] Yeah, it's a weird, crazy bridge.
[649] It belongs to a different song.
[650] Yes, but it's kind of, it's also complete genius at the same time.
[651] But sometimes it's fun to have a bridge that really jumps out.
[652] I'm excited.
[653] You and I are going to record a song together.
[654] Michael's going to produce it And again, then I'm just going to hammer you Are you going to sing?
[655] Can you sing?
[656] I mean, no offense I'm not implying that you can't sing Because you did sing just now But in a funny voice Can you sing in a not funny voice?
[657] That wasn't a funny voice That was the best voice that I had How would you tell if I could sing?
[658] I know, I don't know Silent night This is Holy Night See, how can we keep We can't write a comedy song We're not Alan Sherman We can't do, we're not Listen, maybe you'll handle the vocals I know, I know, I know We'll figure it out We're going to figure it out But I want our listeners to be This is going to be a collaboration Which means if it's any good Amy and man will do 98 % of it And I'll be on cowbell That's how we'll figure this out But this was delightful.
[659] I wanted to talk to you for a long time and actually have this conversation.
[660] So this was really nice that you could.
[661] Well, I'm no longer apprehensive.
[662] Oh, really?
[663] What have you switched to?
[664] You're now.
[665] How do you feel about being Conan O 'Brien's friend?
[666] Enthusiastic.
[667] Oh, good.
[668] Until you find out what the publishing deal is on our song.
[669] My people will call you.
[670] My people will tear your people to shreds.
[671] We will send you.
[672] We will FedEx you some papers to sign.
[673] Amy, thank you so much for coming in.
[674] This was great.
[675] This is very fun.
[676] As you guys know, I love gossip.
[677] I love my tea.
[678] Isn't that true, Sona?
[679] Yeah, you love your hot gosh.
[680] I call it tea.
[681] Isn't that something that I should be?
[682] I don't think you can say I love my tea.
[683] I don't know if that's the way it works.
[684] And it sounds weird coming from you anyway.
[685] Also, often when I say it, I just like an actual tea.
[686] Camomile.
[687] I think that's what you mean.
[688] Yeah, I don't mean.
[689] Yeah.
[690] in this segment's supposed to be about gossip.
[691] Okay.
[692] Well, my enthusiasm level just dropped incredibly because I have all these facts at my disposal about different blends, your English breakfast, your Scottish lunch.
[693] Did you research tea before this segment thinking we were going to talk about tea?
[694] I take these segments seriously, and I went to the library because that's the only place to get information, and I went through the library cards, the Dewey Decimal System.
[695] But now that I know that it's about gossip, I'm even more excited, because I love gossip.
[696] I love, and as you say, Sona, I loves my hot goss.
[697] So I'm very happy to report that Team Coco finally has a gossip expert in the house, comedian Solomon Giorgio.
[698] Very happy that he's on board.
[699] Hi, hello.
[700] That's Solomon laughing there.
[701] Solomon, I love anyone who just giggles at their own name.
[702] That is your actual name, Solomon.
[703] Every time I hear, I'm like, are you sure?
[704] Yeah, yeah.
[705] Trust me. My name, my first name gets a laugh out of.
[706] me every time.
[707] But anyway, Solomon has been in the Team Coco family for a while.
[708] He's appeared at our live shows.
[709] He's been on the late night show.
[710] And just before the world went on lockdown, Solomon hit send on a tweet that changed his life.
[711] The tweet was, I don't care about celebrity gossip.
[712] Give me small scale gossip.
[713] And you had no idea what you were going to get back when you sent that tweet out, did you?
[714] No, I did not.
[715] I did not expect hundreds of responses to truly the most, just an afterthought that I had, just in the middle of the...
[716] Yeah, the tweet went viral, complete stranger started sending Solomon their juiciest stories.
[717] Now he's serving them up on The Juice, a brand new podcast from Team Coco, featuring Solomon and a celebrity guest discussing low stakes gossip stories.
[718] It's low stakes and very high on the petty, I think, which is, I always like petty gossip.
[719] I love a good petty.
[720] I've held every grudge my entire life.
[721] Not a single one has been let go.
[722] The Irish, all we're really known for is very green grass and the ability to hold a grudge for thousands of years over the smallest thing.
[723] Hey, you put the stone on my side of the farm.
[724] It should say on your side of the farm.
[725] And then they're bitter about it for a thousand years.
[726] Anyway, Solomon, thanks for being with us.
[727] And you've brought some juicy gossip to share.
[728] I want to hear this because I want to weigh in.
[729] I'm a very wise man. Well, this actually, I brought some historical gossip, some stuff from the past.
[730] Because gossip has been around for a while.
[731] It's been like segments in new.
[732] newspapers for the longest time.
[733] Gossip's been around.
[734] I mean, it's been around for a while.
[735] I think right after Adam and Eve were kicked out of, you know, Eden, gossip started.
[736] Yeah, about this naked man and woman and what was it with a snake and how come the apple.
[737] And so, yes, it's been with us since day one, and it's probably kept the earth turning.
[738] And I respected.
[739] So Conan and Matt, I know that you both are history buffs.
[740] So these are historical pieces of gossip that we put together for you.
[741] These historical pieces of gossip come from the Hamilton Evening Journal, August 6, 1892.
[742] Ooh.
[743] Yeah.
[744] That's juicy.
[745] A woman, not a thousand miles from Richmond, was, without doubt, the most flurried female in seven counties when she discovered, after coming out of church Sunday, that her brand new hat was adorned with a tag, whereupon was inscribed the legend reduced to 275.
[746] Oh, my God.
[747] So how humiliating for her.
[748] Yeah.
[749] She bought a hat on sale?
[750] She bought a hat on sale and was probably humiliated because it made the paper, right?
[751] It made the paper, but also like she's leaving church.
[752] She's supposed to not, she's supposed to have the newest hat, I'm assuming, because it's a church function.
[753] Yeah, the Sunday finest.
[754] And she showed up the cheap hat and she didn't take the tag off.
[755] Also, this just shows you how little was happening in the news that day.
[756] Or, or what a bad newspaper it was?
[757] Because what if this was the same day that like President Garfield was shot?
[758] And they were like, what should we do?
[759] The president's been shot in a train station in Washington.
[760] Wait a minute, this just over the transom.
[761] Stop the press.
[762] Stop the presses.
[763] The president, he'll either live or die.
[764] There's nothing we can do about it.
[765] But, you know, Enid Crab Tree just wore a reduced hat at the Methodist Church.
[766] We've got to get this out there.
[767] Do you remember Minnie Pearls?
[768] She used to wear a hat with the tag hanging down?
[769] Is this in reference to that?
[770] No, no, no, no. no, this was a very, I don't think Minnie Pearl knew about this story.
[771] She might have.
[772] Is that what you're saying?
[773] Like, look, Minnie Pearl might be all knowing.
[774] She might be the woman.
[775] That would make Minnie Pearl, who I'm going to guess, passed away like 10 years ago.
[776] So she would have been, I don't know, 120 when she died.
[777] I'm sorry.
[778] Could happen.
[779] Who's Minnie Pearl?
[780] A rapper that just hit huge.
[781] Just out of, out of, out of, you got to know what's going on.
[782] Right?
[783] Straight out of Oakland.
[784] Minnie Pearl.
[785] Oh, that's Minnie Pearl.
[786] Famous was at the Grand Old Opry.
[787] She was a comedian, and then she was on he -ha.
[788] She was a, you know, big -time comic in her day.
[789] And that was her trademark, was a tag hanging from her hat.
[790] So those are things, I love that you're learning, Sona, about the history of women in comedy.
[791] Yes, from you, a man in comedy.
[792] It makes sense.
[793] Sort of in comedy, I guess.
[794] I don't know.
[795] It's unclear to me what I'm doing anymore.
[796] It is just, the reduced price hat is sort of the thing.
[797] That's like you can't, it is gauche.
[798] You can't be caught in that situation.
[799] So Many Pro is doing like a nice little tip to something that's happened to many women, unfortunately.
[800] Of course, nowadays, to get to elicit the same kind of scandal, you'd probably just have to walk naked.
[801] Do you know what I mean?
[802] Out of a church that you just sat on fire to get the same amount of attention.
[803] This society has changed so much.
[804] I don't think if someone saw a reduced sale tag, also that would look cool.
[805] Like, I think aren't there a lot of celebrities who like to let it out there that I only spent $8 on this or I only spent, this was only $15 and you're seen as thrifty, which is, which is cool.
[806] And there was a fashion to keep the stickers on your ball cap for a long time, too.
[807] But also, like, it shows like how different our society was.
[808] People like talk about cancel culture.
[809] Like, she got canceled for wearing a reduced priced hat.
[810] We hope she was just canceled.
[811] may have been run out of town.
[812] Or murdered.
[813] Murdered.
[814] Who knows?
[815] We don't know.
[816] The stakes were very high back in the 1890s.
[817] And so we don't know what happened to her.
[818] I think it's just safe to assume that she was dismembered.
[819] She was dismayed.
[820] Maybe she was going to return the hat after church.
[821] So she left the tag on.
[822] And a lot of influencers do that now where they buy expensive clothes, keep the tags on, and then return it after they take photos for, you know, their social media.
[823] I feel like that's, I think, I think back in the past, all sales were final.
[824] I think that's usually.
[825] Also, she was also responsible for the first selfie as she came out of the church.
[826] She waited, she waited while a guy with a camera, she waited with a guy with a camera, set up the tripod, put the flash powder on the pan, put his head underneath that big sheet, and then set the de garatite levels to this correct settings.
[827] And she had to stand still for 40, minutes for her selfie.
[828] Wait, that's not a selfie.
[829] She had to get under that curtain.
[830] Yeah, she got under the curtain, she got under the curtain, she got everything just right.
[831] Then she lit the flash powder and jumped back into frame.
[832] And it was the first recorded selfie, August 6th, 1892, look it up.
[833] Solomon, what else you got?
[834] The city of Humboldt in Kansas has a young woman's military band that goes around playing for picnics and celebrations.
[835] It may be all right for a woman to play on a brass horn but it makes the lips hard just the same what what year are we talking about here this is 1892 same this is also happening in 1892 yes women were just going insane at this time I know so like she'd walk around town and everybody'd be like oh there's hard -lipped shiloh over there don't go near her yeah it's a whole it was actually a whole women's band the military band on top of that so they were in the military so wait a minute wow uh I'm confused.
[836] It does make the lips hard was considered a bad thing.
[837] Yeah, that's the part that I'm sure.
[838] Like, I feel like is it just because they're all women and they shouldn't be getting their lips hard?
[839] And that's against the rules.
[840] I think so.
[841] I don't understand.
[842] I don't know.
[843] But it sounds kind of sexual.
[844] Yeah.
[845] To get your lips hard.
[846] Oh, I think it's that their lips have been spoiled now.
[847] They don't have soft lips anymore.
[848] Oh, okay.
[849] I was saying the way was written sounded sexual.
[850] Yeah.
[851] I like a hard -lipped woman.
[852] What about like chapped crusty lips like that?
[853] I like that too.
[854] That sounds great.
[855] You know?
[856] Oh.
[857] Yeah.
[858] Honestly, smooth lips, really, they just, they don't tell a story.
[859] And that's what I think the issue is.
[860] Yeah.
[861] I think that's, I'm with Solomon on this one.
[862] Anyone can have smooth lips.
[863] That just means you, you haven't lived life.
[864] Yeah.
[865] But give me a hard -lipped woman whose lips are chapped, crusty, flaking.
[866] I want.
[867] You want her to leave some of her lips on you.
[868] Exactly.
[869] Oh, come on.
[870] I wanted to feel like, what?
[871] I wanted to feel like I just kissed a freshly sandblasted banister.
[872] And, and that's what I like.
[873] Hey, that's what, I swear to God, first thing, when I saw my wife way back in 2000 across the room, first thing I shot it was, yo, you got some hard lips.
[874] And then I said, I said, give me some of that skin chap.
[875] Oh, good.
[876] Yeah, I said, flake me up, baby.
[877] Anyway, she refused.
[878] Oh, no. Yeah, it took me a year to recover just from that.
[879] She got a restraining order.
[880] But then, about a year later, she had forgotten that I said that.
[881] I said that that was someone else, and she believed it.
[882] So we got past it.
[883] I'll ask her.
[884] This is good gossip.
[885] I like this.
[886] I like historical gossip.
[887] This is good.
[888] I like my, I like, I like, I call it the goo.
[889] Give me the goo.
[890] Don't I always say that, Sona?
[891] The goo?
[892] Yeah.
[893] You do.
[894] I say, what's the goo?
[895] What's the goo?
[896] And to me, that just means the gooey sweet gossip, the goo.
[897] That's what I like.
[898] I like that.
[899] Num, num, num, num, num, num, num, num, num, num, num, num, num.
[900] My favorite memory, I used to work at the JC Penny, the suit department, and I would just go hang out with women in the perfume department, and they would smoke mentholz, and then we'd watch passions, and the entire time, we would just swap stories of gossip.
[901] So that's like, that's always going to be.
[902] That sounds amazing.
[903] You watched passions?
[904] I loved passions.
[905] I watched it, too.
[906] Oh, my.
[907] Oh my God.
[908] That was the best soap ever.
[909] It was a fever dream of the soap opera.
[910] I was just going to say it was a fever dream.
[911] I didn't see this soap opera.
[912] What made it so great?
[913] It had witches and had a living doll.
[914] It was very, very wild.
[915] Yeah, living doll.
[916] A little person played a living doll and it was all shot on early video too.
[917] Oh, I remember that.
[918] I didn't watch it, but I remembered everybody was talking about it.
[919] It was insane.
[920] It was off its rocker.
[921] Crazy.
[922] Bring back passions.
[923] That's all I came here for.
[924] That's all.
[925] Yeah.
[926] You know what I want to do?
[927] I want to, let's see if we can't.
[928] use our resources, Solomon, and get some behind -the -scenes gossip from the making of the show passions.
[929] I bet we can get something good going there.
[930] I'm sure I can't.
[931] I probably can't do that.
[932] I'm not actually doing right now after this.
[933] Yeah, yeah.
[934] I can't think of a better use of two adult time than to drop everything where...
[935] Two adult times.
[936] Two adult time.
[937] All right.
[938] Well, what are you going to do?
[939] So this has been a lot of fun.
[940] And I'm very happy that you're getting to do what you love.
[941] That's the trick in life, Solomon.
[942] Find out what you love and then trick people into paying you to do it.
[943] And congratulations, sir.
[944] You've done that.
[945] And just a reminder everybody from workplace romances at Denny's to moms with secret lovers.
[946] Oh, my God.
[947] Each week, Solomon's source is only the best everyday gossip from comedians, performers and listeners like you.
[948] In fact, I went on the juice.
[949] I had a blast.
[950] Sona, I think you did as well, right?
[951] I did.
[952] I had so much fun.
[953] I really did.
[954] I really did.
[955] Talk to Solomon was awesome.
[956] Well, he's here listening.
[957] Allegedly.
[958] Of course you're going to say that.
[959] Yeah, allegedly.
[960] Yeah, I know.
[961] Yeah.
[962] I know.
[963] And he's...
[964] I was paying him accomplishing.
[965] Yeah, but you're on Zoom and I saw you do air quotes when he was awesome.
[966] So insulting.
[967] So insulting.
[968] Do you think he saw it?
[969] I hope he did.
[970] I know.
[971] I don't think so.
[972] I saw him.
[973] He's crying now.
[974] He's visibly crying, so do with that what you will.
[975] But probably crying about something else.
[976] Yeah, but anyway, no, it really is fun.
[977] New episodes of The Juice are out every week.
[978] Listen wherever you get, your podcast.
[979] And thank you, Solomon.
[980] Thank you so much.
[981] Conan O 'Brien needs a friend.
[982] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley.
[983] Produced by me, Matt Gourley.
[984] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Solitaroff, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin.
[985] Alan Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf.
[986] Theme song by The White Stripes.
[987] Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
[988] Take it away, Jimmy.
[989] Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples.
[990] Engineering by Will Beckton.
[991] Additional production support by Mars Melnik.
[992] Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.
[993] You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode.
[994] Got a question for Conan?
[995] Call the Team Cocoa hotline at 323 -251 -2821 and leave a message.
[996] It too could be featured on a future episode.
[997] And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.
[998] This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.