Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend XX
[0] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[1] Want to talk to Conan?
[2] Visit team cocoa .com slash call Conan.
[3] Okay, let's get started.
[4] Hey, Ben.
[5] Welcome to Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[6] Hi, everybody.
[7] How's it going?
[8] Hey, Ben.
[9] How are you?
[10] You know, I'm doing just fine.
[11] How about yourselves?
[12] I'm doing well.
[13] That's all the time we have.
[14] It's nice chatting with you, Ben.
[15] Well, it's nice to see you.
[16] Where are you calling in from, Ben?
[17] So I'm calling in from Tacoma, but I live just up the road in Seattle.
[18] So that's like in Washington State.
[19] I know my Seattle well.
[20] I married into Seattle.
[21] My wife is from Seattle, and I go there a lot.
[22] Currently, my in -laws from Seattle are visiting us here in Los Angeles.
[23] Oh, beautiful.
[24] So I spent a lot of time with them.
[25] And, yes, Seattle's a wonderful place.
[26] I really like it there.
[27] I keep meaning to go visit that trash can that got for you in Langley.
[28] Yes, I was on an island.
[29] I haven't made it over there.
[30] I was in one of the islands, and I was there because my wife.
[31] wife had a play that was being produced there.
[32] And they found that I was in town and they said they wanted to honor me. And they named a trash can after me. Um, the highest honor.
[33] You know, I assumed it was.
[34] Um, and I went with it.
[35] And they actually, we had a lot of fun.
[36] It was a nice sort of happening.
[37] And, uh, a good time was had by all.
[38] But let's not talk about me and my awards and the trash can that bears my name.
[39] Let's talk about you.
[40] Tell us a little bit about yourself.
[41] What do you do for a living there, Ben?
[42] So I've got an assemblage of very odd jobs.
[43] So my day job is I built pipe organs, the kind you would find in a church or university, stuff like that.
[44] And then a seasonal part -time gig is I play organ at the Seattle Cracken NHL games.
[45] Yes, Unleash the Cracken.
[46] That's you got it, Conan.
[47] No, that is, when they named that NHL franchise, the Cracken, I was so happy.
[48] And then they, that's their motto is Unleash the Cracken.
[49] and I thought, this is genius.
[50] So I started rooting for the Cracken just because of the creative choice.
[51] Yeah, I was down with the Cracken.
[52] I'm still down with the Cracken.
[53] Is it Unleash or release?
[54] Unleash.
[55] Usually I think it's release, but not to side with Gurley, not to side with Gurley out the gate.
[56] Oh.
[57] I'm just going by Clash of the Titans.
[58] Yeah.
[59] So I've been doing it wrong.
[60] I've been shouting, Unleash the Cracken.
[61] And whenever I do that, they lose.
[62] Oh.
[63] This might be on me. The Franken was leased.
[64] Yeah.
[65] Well, I just think of, I've seen many times I go to the park and stuff and they say, please keep your crack unleashed.
[66] And so as a rule follower, that's why I went with Unleash.
[67] I was wrong.
[68] You guys were right.
[69] And Gorley, you were right.
[70] I wasn't doing it to be right.
[71] I was just correcting history and Clash of the Titans.
[72] This is important.
[73] I understand.
[74] Okay.
[75] So we have a lot to talk about here.
[76] First of all, let's talk pipe organs.
[77] I know nothing about pipe organs.
[78] Of course, I've, I grew up going to many masses and seeing a lot of pipe organs in my life.
[79] And so I'm very impressed by them, but I don't know anything about them.
[80] How do you, I mean, how did you become a guy who makes a pipe organ?
[81] How does one, and you're a young man, it's not like your great -grandfather handed this on down to you.
[82] It feels like this is just something you kind of figured out on your own.
[83] Yeah, you know, it's just a series of stumbling into odd career paths.
[84] I went to school for engineering and decided about halfway through that I didn't really want to do that and wanted to try and figure out how can I do work with my hands, build stuff and through a series of very chance encounters at the University of Illinois got linked up with a pipework and builder there but they didn't need any more people and believe it or not there's a lot of people that do this throughout the country and so he kind of put the guy there pointed me to a website that listed a bunch of other ones and I just sent a bunch of emails saying hey I think what you guys is due is neat.
[85] Do you need another hand around the shop?
[86] And one thing led to another, and now I live in Seattle and do this.
[87] You know what?
[88] I like that.
[89] Perseverance.
[90] Perseverance, you had a sense of what you wanted to do and you kept at it.
[91] Did you choose the right path?
[92] I'm not sure.
[93] You know, verdict's out every day.
[94] Be honest with you, Ben.
[95] What do you have against pipe organs?
[96] I was attacked by one.
[97] Oh.
[98] Yeah, it fell over on me. And the sound it made was incredible.
[99] It was like, as I was, my life was being crushed out of me. No, Ben, I obviously think it's very cool what you do.
[100] Tell me how many pipes are in a pipe organ?
[101] It kind of depends on the size.
[102] So we will do anything from some of the ones we're finishing up right now are kind of a smaller practice size.
[103] They go in a practice room where if you had a nice vaulted ceiling, you could fit it in your house.
[104] Those might have, you know, a couple hundred.
[105] But the biggest organ that we've done, I think has in the ballpark around 5 ,000.
[106] Five thousand pipes.
[107] Now.
[108] And they range in size.
[109] So like the smallest one will be able to.
[110] about like an inch long, you know, that's your high -pitched stuff that'll sound kind of like this.
[111] Oh, my God.
[112] On the bigger range of the scale, the largest pipe that'll end up going in most of the organs we do from kind of tip to tail is around 32 feet long.
[113] And what sound does that make?
[114] Would that make like a...
[115] A be -oh.
[116] Exactly.
[117] You nailed it.
[118] Oh, my God, he's got one.
[119] But we do...
[120] This isn't like the big one, but it's at least a little deeper to give you kind of the range here.
[121] Oh, my God.
[122] Oh, my God.
[123] I think we overdid it there.
[124] It made the sound that we thought it would make, and then all of us went.
[125] You did it better, I think, actually.
[126] Oh, my God.
[127] It's just so different than the other one.
[128] Yes.
[129] Wow.
[130] It really was.
[131] I mean, I didn't expect.
[132] No, one was very high.
[133] And then the other was.
[134] Small ones to do pitch.
[135] A high pitch.
[136] Yeah.
[137] Low.
[138] Yeah, shocking.
[139] Okay.
[140] So it's incredible that you learned how to do that.
[141] Is there a lot of welding, soldering involved, a lot of metal work?
[142] Do you put on goggles?
[143] Are there sparks flying?
[144] Paint a picture for me. Yeah, it's just like, you know, the fires of Vulcan and the face.
[145] You know, there's a lot of soldering.
[146] These secrets are making organ pipes, and actually a lot of, like, brass musical instruments, is a lot of just kind of beating the shit out of it until it's the right shape.
[147] Yeah, that's right.
[148] Uh, so that's, uh, it's definitely a physical job, um, but, uh, yeah, so we'll start with, um, liquid, we'll start with ingots of metal and we'll melt them down in a big furnace.
[149] Um, so you have this liquid kind of Terminator 2000 kind of looking stuff.
[150] This is a real, I'm sorry.
[151] And I'm, and I'm, I don't want to embarrass you, but you're like a real person because you're taking my job does not involve, and I envy you for this.
[152] My job doesn't involve taking ingots of metal and melting them down in a vat.
[153] And I come into this room and a t -shirt.
[154] And I come into this room and a t -shirt.
[155] And I come into this room and a t - shirt and blah blah blah blah this is you're actually building things that will outlive you these these pipe organs will live they could live for a thousand years but not to not to be in the defense but you make something out of nothing you're right I have no you're right I have no ability you're no you're you're a conjurer you know I'm a conjurer yes yes I I'm I'm I suppose I am a conjurer if you will yeah but I am not the same his is way cooler yeah that's true yeah that goes so you know so you make these amazing organs.
[156] Let's say I wanted to buy an organ, you know, be nice if someone would, you know, give me one, an organ donor, if you will.
[157] But, uh, oh God.
[158] Home -run.
[159] But my question is, but my question is, there was nothing there and I made something.
[160] Something horrible.
[161] Yeah, a pile of shit.
[162] Okay, there you go.
[163] Thank you.
[164] Critics, everyone's a critic.
[165] How much, how much are we talking?
[166] Let's say I wanted to buy a pipe organ for my wife for her.
[167] her birthday.
[168] Top of the line, mid -range?
[169] What?
[170] I'm looking for something mid -range.
[171] I don't want to go with a small organ.
[172] I want to go with something that has at least a thousand pipes.
[173] Okay.
[174] So as long as your estate has the space to kind of accommodate something that big, you're talking about the million -dollar range.
[175] You're talking to Conan O 'Brien.
[176] I have nine estates that have been joined together with various bridges and habit trails.
[177] So I scurry through tubes to get from one estate to the other.
[178] Okay, so what are we talking about?
[179] Let's say, Let's say I had, I wanted a thousand pipe organ.
[180] What do you think it might run me?
[181] You're probably going to run in like the million dollar range somewhere.
[182] Which for years, I'm sure, chump change.
[183] I wouldn't say chump change.
[184] I mean, I'd have to shake out a couple of couch cushions, but we'd find it.
[185] No, no. That's so cool.
[186] How long would it take to build?
[187] It usually takes about a year from when we'll start in on one project.
[188] And the shop, there's eight guys that work here full time.
[189] And everyone's kind of got their specialty.
[190] So like right now, for example, the pipes, we're starting the next.
[191] next organ while we're finishing up some of the casework on the previous ones, but generally something around that size, like a thousand, two thousand pipes.
[192] Let me ask you a really obnoxious Los Angeles question.
[193] If I threw more money at it, could I get it faster?
[194] What if I was like, hey, if you want to come help out, sure.
[195] No, no, just do that obnoxious.
[196] Like, hey, I need this in three months.
[197] I'll give you 10 million.
[198] Would any, or is that just impossible?
[199] It would make my life a lot worse if you wanted to do that.
[200] The kind of guy I'm impersonating doesn't care.
[201] Yeah.
[202] Yeah, and you'd get $10 million.
[203] Well, no, he'd eventually not pay.
[204] Oh, man. Come on.
[205] No, I'm talking.
[206] This guy is awful.
[207] Is this guy currently running for president?
[208] He's running again for president.
[209] Okay, yeah.
[210] Um, uh, but anyway, um, let's talk about your other gig, which is you play at the Cracken games.
[211] What, I mean, what kind of, what kind of songs do you play when you're on that, that organ, you know?
[212] What are the, what, what?
[213] A little bit of everything.
[214] There's like, there's like, You know that one?
[215] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[216] You know, there's those kind of the old standbys, your Let's Go Cracking and stuff like that.
[217] But especially being a new team, you kind of get to start fresh and really build the repertoire however you see fit.
[218] So, you know, I'll play classic rock songs.
[219] I'll play hip -hop songs.
[220] You play hip -hop on a pipe organ?
[221] You can get away with anything on an organ because there's no lyrics.
[222] Oh, so you're playing some hardcore hip -hop.
[223] You know, from time to time.
[224] I don't want to get you in trouble, but what would be the nastiest song that you've played at a Cracken Game?
[225] Or do you not want to say it?
[226] Well, you know, you don't censor anything, right?
[227] So I think the song title that would have gotten me most in trouble, there's an exhibit song called Motherfucker.
[228] So that's an example one that you probably couldn't play if it in your jam.
[229] We sing some of it, Connor?
[230] We all know Motherfucker.
[231] That's a good one.
[232] Yeah.
[233] Something like that.
[234] Oh, that's so cool.
[235] That's great.
[236] Why don't you?
[237] Why don't you play it and I'll sing it?
[238] Go ahead.
[239] Yep, yeah.
[240] Motherfucker.
[241] I mean, I was actually, I was almost right.
[242] Is what shocking is that you were pretty close on where the motherfucker dropped.
[243] Yeah.
[244] It must be fun.
[245] I mean, first of all, it sounds like you're a talented musician as well.
[246] So this must be really nice that you've built this life for yourself.
[247] It's one of those things you show up to.
[248] work and it's like, it is stupid that someone let me do this.
[249] I know exactly what you're talking about.
[250] I thought you might.
[251] Yeah.
[252] No, I do think to get serious for a second, I do think that one of the main goals, then I talk to my kids about this all the time is really try and figure out what excites you, what you like, and then, you know, just keep at it and try and figure out a way to make that thing that brings you some joy, a career.
[253] And, you know, because I've, I talk to people all the time who really hate what they do.
[254] That's just no way to go through life if you can possibly avoid it.
[255] Well, and it's, and like the other side of it, you know, the advice part of it, too, that, you know, I'll tell people all the time is that any job I've ever had has never been from, like, a job listing and just applying something.
[256] It's been finding, like, oh, here's something I'm really interested.
[257] And then you have to find the people who are doing what you want to do and find a way to get involved.
[258] Yeah.
[259] I can't believe how many people do this.
[260] Yeah.
[261] It's pretty common.
[262] Is there common?
[263] Do you guys have conventions?
[264] It's more common than you'd think.
[265] Well, there's like every city needs one of you guys, right?
[266] Yeah.
[267] No, it's true.
[268] Every city needs at least someone who's making pipe organs or maintaining them.
[269] Right, yeah.
[270] And then you've got to figure out if there's at least one, often there's more.
[271] Do you guys have a union?
[272] Is there a pipe organ union?
[273] There's no union, not yet.
[274] What's organized?
[275] I'd like to organize you guys.
[276] Unionize.
[277] We'll get on the phone.
[278] What's going to do this?
[279] And then let's you and I unionize Sona.
[280] I'm down.
[281] I'm going to bring in some thugs and goons.
[282] For just the two of us?
[283] Yeah, it's going to be like an automobile plant in the 30s.
[284] Oh, man. I'm going to beat you with pipes.
[285] Get the National Guard on trains to come in.
[286] Yes, exactly.
[287] I'm going to get all these guys that really are dressed like this was the 30s.
[288] And you guys are just going to be having a quiet conversation over in the kitchen area over Flan talking about, Um, yeah, maybe we could work out.
[289] And these guys are going to come and just start wailing on you with pipes.
[290] Yeah.
[291] Hey, and you can bring the pipes.
[292] Oh, yeah, there you go.
[293] Perfect.
[294] Yeah, I think I'm on their side, though.
[295] You know, solidarity.
[296] Yeah, you'll be on their side, but later on you realize, wait a minute, the pipes they used to, Conan had the goons hit Sonan and Gorley with were made.
[297] That's going to be the twist ending, is you're going to think this is horrible, and then you're going to see your signature on the pipes.
[298] See?
[299] But then I'll remember that 10 million.
[300] dollar demand where I had to work, you know, round the clock, slaving away for Conan's pipe organ, and then I'll remember, no, my heart's with the little people.
[301] Yeah, exactly.
[302] Then you realize I didn't need a pipe organ.
[303] I just wanted the pipes to hit Gorley and Sona to keep them from unionizing.
[304] You're like, hey, Conan, do you care about that?
[305] I don't care about what's the size of the pipes.
[306] Send the bigger, heavier pipes sooner.
[307] I don't like those little pipes.
[308] I don't need the organ, just the pipes.
[309] Yeah, I don't need the organs.
[310] I just need the pipe.
[311] That's very cool.
[312] And, and And the one that you play for The Cracken, I know that you play that, like, hip hop and stuff like that.
[313] But how does the Let's Go Cracken song go?
[314] Is it the standard?
[315] Is it?
[316] Yeah.
[317] Let's go.
[318] Unleash the Cracken, right?
[319] Well, it's just usually it's, you know, unleash the Cracken.
[320] It's release.
[321] And then the claps.
[322] Release the crack.
[323] Yeah.
[324] Unleash the Crackin.
[325] Just say you were incorrect.
[326] And you were wrong.
[327] It really flows.
[328] Unleash the Cracken.
[329] Un, you get to really hit Un.
[330] Release the Cracken.
[331] Nope, doesn't work.
[332] Release the Cracken.
[333] And let's see if I can get this turned around in Seattle so it's Unleash the Cracken.
[334] So this Cracken, this underwater sea creature, is on a leash?
[335] Yeah.
[336] He's on a leash.
[337] Okay.
[338] And then the other team isn't afraid and they're winning.
[339] And then suddenly the mascot comes out and unleashes the Cracken.
[340] It's just in the movie, there's literally a cage that they release.
[341] It's a lot of logistics to have to fight with a leash.
[342] To do with a leash?
[343] No, you take the leash off.
[344] Now, there's going to have to be a collar.
[345] Does he have a harness too?
[346] Yeah, he has a harness too.
[347] It sort of keeps his chest stable.
[348] Okay.
[349] And it's easier to walk him and he heals better.
[350] And he has a little torso sweater.
[351] He has a little torso sweater.
[352] And he's got a little thing that says what his chip ID number is.
[353] Because when you're cracking goes lost, you want to make sure that if anyone finds him, they take him to the nearest vet.
[354] That's true.
[355] Listen, I've given this a lot of thought, and I think I've just improved the Cracken.
[356] This is very cool.
[357] I think we should chip in because we have a cool little spot here.
[358] Let me see where I'm going, okay?
[359] Yeah, let him see where he's going.
[360] Yeah, let me see where I'm going here, go Dutch.
[361] We have a place here, our offices, and I think there'd be some room for a pipe organ.
[362] That is exactly where I thought he was going.
[363] It would have to be not too big because our space isn't.
[364] huge and the pipes would probably have to go through at least two ceilings and come out the roof.
[365] Would that work?
[366] We've got, we can give you some smaller ones that are only about 12 feet tall.
[367] So that might just be one ceiling for you.
[368] So, you know, there's options.
[369] We can talk about it.
[370] You said chip in?
[371] We have to chip in.
[372] Wait a minute.
[373] Why should I have to pay for everything?
[374] This is your building, this, your podcast.
[375] I'm not interested in co -owning an organ.
[376] Yeah.
[377] I want the full thing.
[378] Yeah.
[379] I would like a whole organ.
[380] My assumption was that you guys would donate, but I would still own it completely.
[381] We're not going to donate.
[382] We're going to unionize this.
[383] That's right.
[384] All right, I'm going to need these pipes faster than I thought.
[385] I want the really good whacking pipes.
[386] I don't care what they sound like.
[387] As I'm hitting, Sony, you hear, do you?
[388] Do you?
[389] Hey, Ben, it's been really nice talking to you.
[390] Do you have a question?
[391] So my question would be, you know, it's a matter of when, not if you make the transition into professional sports.
[392] Thank you.
[393] Physiques such as yours, I think you're natural for hockey.
[394] Ben, I'm always curious.
[395] I admire where you're coming from, and you seem like a very sensible and perceptive young man. So the question is, yeah.
[396] What sport?
[397] The question would be, you know, when you make the jump over to hockey, what would you want as like your goal song?
[398] So, you know, you've just absolutely wheeled down the ice and, you know, you found an opening in the goal, you embarrass them.
[399] You just get the puck in the back of the net.
[400] What song do you want reverberating as the crowd goes wild?
[401] What's the theme from St. Elmo's Fire?
[402] Oh.
[403] San Amos Fire.
[404] Here we're going to get it.
[405] Eduardo's looking it up.
[406] What is it?
[407] Oh, were you just doing your taxes?
[408] You jumped immediately on the...
[409] I was researching unions.
[410] Yes.
[411] You can join.
[412] You can join.
[413] Now we're three strong.
[414] You're going to get a head full of pipe if you're not careful.
[415] Is it called for just a moment or love theme?
[416] I think it's called St. Elmo's Fire, isn't it?
[417] It's a love theme from St. Elmo's Fire.
[418] I don't think that's it.
[419] Which is really what you want for hockey is a nice love theme.
[420] Alamos Fire, man in motion.
[421] Man in motion.
[422] Can you play a second of it?
[423] John Parr.
[424] Sure.
[425] We'll have to take it out, right?
[426] Yeah, this will have to be taken out.
[427] I know, but then maybe I can sing a second of it and then they'll still come after us, but I'll avoid them.
[428] I'm very good at that.
[429] Why do you want this to be...
[430] Oh.
[431] Oh, my God, this is going to take...
[432] It's an 80s song.
[433] It's going to take...
[434] How much time do you have, Ben?
[435] It's going to take, like, 20 minutes off.
[436] But they're going to play the whole song after you score a goal?
[437] Yeah, whole song.
[438] They'll do about...
[439] Yeah, just for Conan.
[440] Yeah, they'll stop, and everyone will stop, politely listen.
[441] Is there someone that can play like it?
[442] Solo.
[443] Oh.
[444] To see the same us in a million of us of us.
[445] And Robloon.
[446] And luckily, if I take the music out, I don't think this is in any way a royalty problem.
[447] There's all my and there's other people in it too.
[448] But the main one I remember is Demi Moran, Rabo.
[449] Because it's ain't almost fire.
[450] Yeah, that's what I want to play with those lyrics.
[451] Are you going to sing it?
[452] You're going to score.
[453] And then you're going to grab a mic.
[454] Ben's accompanying you on the organ.
[455] Here's the deal.
[456] I score a goal, okay?
[457] I put the crack in a head.
[458] Drop my stick.
[459] Ben tosses me a mic.
[460] I grab it.
[461] Long intro, 80 style.
[462] And then, remember there was a movie.
[463] It came out in 85.
[464] The crowd is filing out of beer in it.
[465] And Ben is wailing away with me. You know?
[466] This is going to be great.
[467] Yeah.
[468] And I'm playing air guitar with my hockey stick.
[469] I can't wait until someone just beats you.
[470] And from the other team just beats you senselessly.
[471] That's going to take at least five.
[472] That's going to take like five minutes for someone to get organized enough.
[473] All right, Ben, it was so cool talking to you.
[474] I look forward to joining the Cracken.
[475] Tell the Cracken I'm coming and I'm going to join.
[476] Yeah, for sure.
[477] I'm going to sing the St. Elmo's theme after every goal I score.
[478] You are going to accompany me. I have new lyrics, which just basically lists who I can remember from the cast.
[479] And it's Unleashed the Cracken, not release the Cracken.
[480] It is now officially Unleash the Cracken, and I want that change made to all merchandise.
[481] And to Clash of the Titans, you're going to go back and change that?
[482] Nope.
[483] Okay.
[484] Hey, Ben, very nice to meet you.
[485] Very cool talking to you and continued success.
[486] I think you're a very cool guy.
[487] Thank you so much.
[488] Appreciate it.
[489] Have a good one, you guys.
[490] Take care.
[491] Conan O 'Brien needs a friend.
[492] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gorley.
[493] Produced by me, Matt Gourley.
[494] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Nick Liao, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf.
[495] Theme song by The White Stripes.
[496] Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
[497] Take it away, Jimmy.
[498] Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples.
[499] Engineering by Eduardo Perez.
[500] Additional production support by Mars Melnik.
[501] Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn.
[502] You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find you find your review read on a future episode.
[503] Got a question for Conan?
[504] Call the Team Coco hotline at 669 -587 -2847 and leave a message.
[505] It too could be featured on a future episode.
[506] And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.
[507] This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.