224 - What’s In Your Pants?

[0] this is exactly right and welcome to my favorite murder this is this is Georgia this is a delay where there's a delay we're still at home that's Karen Kilgara that's Georgia heart stark yes we just pointed at each other through the computer screen oh you should see us pointing oh lots of point I'm sorry that's content that you have to pay extra for we're not recording it wait what wait you do wait oh yeah I'm selling all this on eBay did you not hear did you not hear about how I'm illegally selling everything from our show on eBay I would have put makeup on I know sorry sorry it's more natural if you don't have it on I have to say I do put on makeup just for us in this Zoom only because it's like the one time yeah or two times a week where it's like well it's a almost like a fun thing to do of like hey remember remember makeup i appreciate it and whenever someone wears makeup or like looks nice and i don't i'm like oh sorry oh shoot oh shit oh she i just all my makeup's gonna go bad my fucking foundation already starting to smell i know i know i mean oh it's so awful um also i think we've talked about this but i'm getting worse at doing makeup the longer the longer it goes and the less practice I have.

[1] Yeah.

[2] I mean, it's all going out the fucking window.

[3] It's going, it's a little bit crazy.

[4] All bets are off.

[5] And what are we trying to prove?

[6] I like the idea that if this, if the new norm of entertainment is going to be just people at home on Zoom, then not wearing makeup could be the new norm of being on Zoom.

[7] It's like, let's all it.

[8] Yeah.

[9] That people are pretty unattractive.

[10] There, if they don't have like, special.

[11] affects helping their face and they're over 22.

[12] They're lighting.

[13] They're not great.

[14] And everyone else can relax a little bit and feel better.

[15] You know, it's been a real, I think, hit to a lot of people's understanding of what they look like and what, you know, if they're attractive or not is having to watch your little square of your face and what it looks like when you're talking on Zoom and being like, why am I doing that with my mouth all the time?

[16] For real.

[17] For real.

[18] And I also can't get, you can't get rid of your own face.

[19] Can you?

[20] You can't.

[21] Well, yet you can change the view so it's the gallery view and everyone's the same size yeah I don't want to see no I don't want to be in that gallery I don't either because you know what I'm so self -obsessed the second my face is as big as your guys is I'm like but what's going on over here look at those pores did you see what I did with this eyebrow versus this eyebrow no let me see well this one just I kind of was I was very intense about this one that one looks like it's asking a sexy question hello what What's in your pants?

[22] What's in your pants is Karen's fucking pickup line.

[23] Hello.

[24] It's like a naughty version of what's in your wallet.

[25] Hey.

[26] You're the new spokesperson for.

[27] Pants.

[28] For cargo pants.

[29] For dockers.

[30] But then this eyebrow is a little bit more like, oh, you caught me at a bad time.

[31] And you know something bad is happening in the world.

[32] I have eyelid acne.

[33] Can you see that?

[34] Oh, no. Yes, I do.

[35] I mean, I wouldn't have noticed it.

[36] I think it's from laying on the couch for six hours in a row.

[37] Oh, God.

[38] Can I show you?

[39] I'm in bed right now.

[40] Look at my disgusting, how gross my pillowcase is.

[41] Oh, yes.

[42] I just noticed this is one of those Zit stickers.

[43] Just attached to my pillowcase.

[44] Well, they haven't made those in 25 years.

[45] It's like, you have nothing but time to.

[46] change your pillowcase.

[47] It's all you can do is investigate these things.

[48] And yet you don't do it.

[49] No, you don't look at the bare mints.

[50] That reminds me of my favorite.

[51] Tom Papa has the best joke.

[52] And he was like, do you ever look at your pillowcase and go like, it looks like a civil war bandage?

[53] Yeah, it's better than that, obviously.

[54] I just scared by laughing so loudly.

[55] So sorry to everyone at home.

[56] That's the joke that I wish I wrote so bad.

[57] I think it's something about being a single man. You know it's a single man when his pillowcase looks like a civil war bandage.

[58] Yeah, guys, girls just change it before you come over.

[59] We are just as disgusting.

[60] Speaking of, I wanted to go ahead and start this episode by congratulating all of the graduates out there.

[61] Poor dads, poor grads.

[62] What a shitty June you're going to have.

[63] But yes, congratulations.

[64] Yeah, there's a lot of them and they've been tagging.

[65] us with their graduation from home caps with, you know, stay out of the forest and stuff on it.

[66] So, congrats to all of you guys.

[67] You guys got so ripped off.

[68] You really did.

[69] Well, it's not that fun.

[70] It's, I will say this.

[71] When I remember very distinctly graduating from high school, I, oh, yes, I remember it.

[72] Oh, you graduated?

[73] I did.

[74] But I do remember thinking as I was wearing like the cap and gown and walking down, I was just like, this feels like it should feel like some, like more.

[75] and it doesn't feel like I barely did homework in high school I don't know how I graduated because I really half -assed it the entire time and it just had that feeling of like oh this is one of those landmark moments of my young life that again doesn't have that like John Hughes movie feeling I kept thinking it would it's the first of many disappointments in your adult life everyone yes so welcome as join us they it's the class of 2020 gets it a way bigger disappointment but then because of that then they get like Obama coming in to be like we love you guys the most whereas like your teacher showing up to your house and shit throw you cookies or what they're doing what are they doing I don't know no but it is I keep seeing the videos where it's like people being super proud that they graduated from high school which is so beautiful and great and then teachers coming up and it is that thing you know what it is it's between the students and the teachers, they know what the accomplishment is.

[76] And so the fact that they don't get to kind of do that together is really sucks.

[77] But then I think they're getting it a little bit more because of it.

[78] Yeah.

[79] Like a little extra.

[80] Like the kids who have like their birthdays around like on Christmas and like their parents make a bigger deal of it.

[81] Yes.

[82] It's a bummer.

[83] Which one?

[84] Asher or Lee?

[85] Just say it.

[86] None of us.

[87] None of us.

[88] You're like, again, we're Jewish.

[89] it would have been Hanukkah.

[90] I'm not going to tell you again.

[91] My brother's birthday is on Hanukkah every year.

[92] It's a different day every year.

[93] He does it on purpose.

[94] He does it for the attention.

[95] There's no way his birthday keeps changing.

[96] And yet I told them there's no way, but they told me you're making a problem.

[97] My sister sent her student, well, they are kindergartner.

[98] So they just, to them, this is school.

[99] You just kind of bail out of school in March.

[100] Like they don't know.

[101] Yeah.

[102] But she sends them, she's been sending.

[103] them mail so that they just have little aside from her videos where she reads some stories and she sent everybody some stickers in the mail and then basically saying I miss you and you know like whatever and then she's sending me the pictures of them the parents taking the pictures of when they open their mail and get their stickers and it's the cutest yes I've just been sending my nephews expensive toys good and it didn't think I didn't even cross my mind to do something like personal and kind.

[104] Yeah.

[105] My friend Albertina, I walked to the mailbox today because I also never get my mail because I rarely get it.

[106] And I went to the mailbox today and pulled out a postcard from my friend Albertina who was like, hey, I just wanted you to know in this strange time that I really care about you.

[107] You're my good friend.

[108] Also, I just bought 100 postcards.

[109] Oh, my God.

[110] That's so smart.

[111] It made me laugh so hard.

[112] Yeah, I think old -fashioned man. It's a great time to support the Postal Service anyway, but everybody loves getting mail.

[113] Okay, you guys, the book club is out.

[114] Postcard sending is in.

[115] We can do both.

[116] No, we can't do both.

[117] It'll be anarchy.

[118] We are not quitting the book club.

[119] I am forcing myself to finish that goddamn book.

[120] I realized after I suggested my book two weeks ago by Karen Slaughter that I didn't put a trigger warning.

[121] for every single thing that's ever happened to a person in their entire fucking life is happening in that book yes it is like there's fucking snuff porn there's fucking kidnapping like it's like she writes these you know like gone girl style books but they're fucking gnarly yeah so i should have said i don't think i realized how deep it got because i was just in the beginning of it yeah so i should have trigger warned that yeah but you know we are talking to it mostly adults we know there's a couple 13 year olds out They're, what's up, Paula, you don't have to be in school.

[122] But for the most part.

[123] And then I found out, someone tagged me that the emotionally immature parent book that I had randomly mentioned and got the title wrong was like trending on one of the like book sites.

[124] Yes.

[125] And I didn't even say it right.

[126] So I want to tell everyone it's called Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson.

[127] Awesome.

[128] And it's really good.

[129] So if you need it, which I didn't realize so many people would need.

[130] it.

[131] Yes.

[132] What it's called.

[133] Yeah.

[134] I think that's, I love the title of that book.

[135] It's so specific.

[136] And I bet you there's people who heard the title and went, I didn't know I could read a book like that.

[137] Right.

[138] Right.

[139] It's great.

[140] It's really helpful.

[141] And so on, let's see, I'll, I'll piggyback that because this is an audio book that I just got.

[142] Because I saw someone else recommending the author.

[143] Her name is Maria Konnikova.

[144] And she just wrote a new book.

[145] And I think I read something by.

[146] hurt go on so well it's i record i sent it to you because i was halfway through and freaking out so i was going to read the new book that i watched someone recommend to somebody else on twitter and then when i got into the audiobook shop on my phone she had a book called the confidence game and it's about con men and why we fall for con men it's like the human psychology of what you're how you're being manipulated by con men when you are and what you want like that's why you're getting it's not because of just them being good, right?

[147] Right.

[148] You want something from them too.

[149] Well, it's that they're playing on these human truths that we all, we all think we're a little bit smarter than the average person.

[150] We think that we can see things other people, other people can't see.

[151] And we think that we're lucky.

[152] We think there's all these very interesting studies that have been done that like, so when you walk up to like a three card money game and maybe you need a little bit of money, there's a voice inside you that tells you I could win this I'm feeling lucky that's what happens to every person because they're getting worked by that whole and also that con men almost never work alone so when you watch other people win a three card money game or one of those street games you're watching a shill win the game a fake person who's working in tandem with the con man and then that's what pulls you in is other people going I can't believe it I just won $50 this book man do they still have have those on the street.

[153] I feel like in every 80s movies, there was a fucking three card Monty game happening on whatever street.

[154] And you just don't see it anymore.

[155] You don't see it as much because I think people are a little more hip to them.

[156] But what you get nowadays is stuff online.

[157] And it's that kind of stuff that with older people, it's, you know, it's the, they call it the grandma scam where it's, um, your grandchild.

[158] I almost fell for one the other day.

[159] Are you serious?

[160] And I'm like, I would never fall for that.

[161] I'm not stupid.

[162] Like I figured I would have known it.

[163] There was no link or anything.

[164] So it was just what I thought from my stepdad's email saying, hey, I can't get into my Amazon account.

[165] Can you just get me a $200 gift card for my nephew's birthday?

[166] Yeah.

[167] And I was like, okay, sure, no problem.

[168] And then, yeah, and I would have done it.

[169] Yeah, it's really embarrassing.

[170] Vince said check it.

[171] Vince was like, oh, John just fucking said his email got.

[172] Just like, yes.

[173] See, so it just seemed, it was so simple.

[174] It wasn't like, click.

[175] this link it was his email address it wasn't a shit ton of money yep yeah it made sense it wasn't a thousand dollars so you didn't go uh he wouldn't ask for that that's weird it was just enough to be believable i was like man you spent a lot of money on your nephew but what do i who am i to say who am i to judge i'm going to get you out of this bind and then there's people who like so that that that was one that they've they know exactly who they're talking to and how to get money out of those people and now it's like worse than it's ever been anyway the book is called the confidence game the author is maria conocova and she's also the narrator which i love because you can feel the people being the expert and talking and no offense to the voiceover actors that do a great job but when the author is the one telling you the story and it's their expertise i feel like i absorb it so much quicker and anyway i just like i listened to that book in two days it was it was so fascinating and now I can't live.

[176] Oh, I love it.

[177] And she has like three other books so I can't wait to read her other ones.

[178] Yeah.

[179] That's awesome.

[180] Listen to.

[181] What are you going to read next?

[182] Well, she has one called How to Think like Sherlock Holmes, which of course I'm like, give it to me, Maria.

[183] You're going to be like a con man and like a detective by the end of.

[184] I'm finally going to rip off old people the way I've always dreamed of.

[185] You're going to learn how to.

[186] And now you know you can send me any amount and be like, hey, I need three hundred dollars.

[187] Hey, it's your brother.

[188] I just need $53.

[189] Look at her.

[190] She did it again.

[191] Dang.

[192] Shit.

[193] I love the, I love when people, I love that idea that we could all hip ourselves up a little bit more and like educate ourselves and not get scammed.

[194] Well, it was a thing of like, I think I'm too smart for to fall for one of those.

[195] Of course.

[196] And now I'm like, no, you're not, dummy.

[197] It's what everyone thinks.

[198] That's the interesting thing.

[199] It's just like what they're actually playing on.

[200] is the commonalities that we all have where the average person which is most people just always assume that they can't be tricked and that of course leaves the door open for you to totally be tricked.

[201] Right.

[202] So I just like the idea that you could learn a little of those some of those scams because it's the thing too where a lot of people once they've been scammed they get scammed again because they can't admit that it happened.

[203] So then they, you know what I mean?

[204] Like it's like if you, They want to fix it.

[205] Yes, exactly.

[206] And oftentimes the mentality is like if you lose $10, then you're like, then they go, do you want to double down?

[207] This could be.

[208] And then they're like, yeah, this is it.

[209] Now we'll get back.

[210] Yeah, exactly.

[211] Right.

[212] It's just fascinating.

[213] That's scary.

[214] I have a podcast that I want to, an episode I want to recommend.

[215] So my new, what am I going to stop calling her?

[216] My new therapist, my therapist, she suggested I look into this, like, like world renowned trauma expert doctor named Dr. Gabor Matte.

[217] Have you heard of him?

[218] Yes.

[219] And yeah.

[220] So I looked him up to look for any podcast episodes he was in and he's in the podcast, the newest podcast last day, which is hosted by Stephanie Whittles Wax, who's Harris, Harris Whittle's sister, who I was friends with.

[221] I wouldn't, I mean, we're acquaintances.

[222] Right.

[223] So he's this incredible trauma expert who really studies the traumatic reasoning behind addiction and everything.

[224] So she has an episode or she interviews him.

[225] It's episode 17 called trauma.

[226] And it was, I mean, it hit home.

[227] It was so incredible.

[228] The podcast is really cool and there's a lot of great episodes.

[229] The last day.

[230] It's called last day.

[231] Just playing that last day.

[232] Last day.

[233] The idea behind it is like people's last day on earth and why and how and you know the reasons behind the issues like harris's opioid addiction and it's just it's really good wow that's great i definitely want to listen to that yeah well i this is a hilarious recommendation from scotty landis of bananas fame bananas the new weird news podcast here on the exactly right network so anyway he he texted me and he goes i'm watching the show it's called Travels by Narrow Boat and it's I believe it's on Netflix it's a British guy who gets divorced sells everything and he gets one of those boats that go along the canals and he basically just puts his whole life on this boat and then it's a series where that's all that happens is him going down those canals.

[234] Is it reality or is it like a fictional?

[235] No no reality oh my God he's like fuck everything follow me down these canals.

[236] Yeah he basically is like filmed himself of like this is I've always dreamed of doing this this is the life I've always wanted and then and then you just watch him where I'm like how and there's like a bunch of seasons so he's been doing it for a while and it's super beautiful but it's also kind of like I think we've talked about it before that um I believe it's Norwegian or Swedish slow TV where you it's just like basically watching something happen in real time that's kind of pleasing looking soothing and like it's not like bam bam bam kind of no it's like do have you ever wanted to go down canals in a narrow boat well now you can it's kind of like that it's really funny is there a dog does you have a dog i've always i'm only i'm only on like episode two season one he might get a dog like things can happen that might be like cliffhanger of season one and then season two it's like suddenly there's a border collie oh my just he gets like a mastiff it's the hugest dog in the world of half the boat, but he makes it work, because this is his life.

[237] What's it called again?

[238] That sounds fun.

[239] It's called Travels by Narrow Boat.

[240] Okay.

[241] And it's almost like, if you're feeling like overwhelmed, I look for a lot of TV that's kind of like, I just want to not think about some stuff and kind of kick it or whatever.

[242] So like, Joe Perra has a new special on adult swim that came out last week.

[243] If you like anything like, it's like he basically took a bunch of old footage of like fish under under water obviously they're not dead gasping for breath on a dock I don't know why he would do it relaxing it's just the Pike Place Market in Seattle it's dead fish on ice anyway it's very soothing no no he's like it's like his Joe Perra's voice which I'm a huge fan of Joe Perry he's a hilarious comic he had a series on adult swim and this is like it came out like it was his comedy special, but it literally is just him talking over, like, footage of relaxing stuff.

[244] I love it.

[245] It's hilarious.

[246] But so that I, that's on par with what I'm kind of looking at these days.

[247] And travels by narrow boat is this series.

[248] And it's very much like that.

[249] We could not be more different because the show that I recommend that I am obsessed with on Netflix is called White Lines.

[250] And it is, I don't, wait.

[251] a second, I think I watched the trailer for that.

[252] Is that like young, hot people in like a boat, like in a harbor town?

[253] Here's what it is.

[254] Here it is.

[255] Okay.

[256] These fucking DJs from Manchester in the late 90s.

[257] So it's like the cool fucking Happy Monday style.

[258] Hell yes.

[259] And spiral carpets.

[260] Get in there.

[261] Drugs.

[262] And then they go to fucking Ibiza to become like world renowned DJs.

[263] Excuse me. It's pronounced Ibiza.

[264] Right.

[265] And what the main guy.

[266] fucking disappears.

[267] And then so it's back then.

[268] And then we go to the fucking present where his sister, who's this gorgeous actress in real, they didn't cast the ugly one?

[269] That's crazy.

[270] That's so edgy.

[271] His sister who was like a teenager at the time goes to the his body gets fine.

[272] She goes to find out who fucking killed her brother in Abiza.

[273] And like it's his old friends.

[274] There's drugs.

[275] There's sex parties.

[276] Like what's, did they kill him or did he kill him?

[277] It's like it's so beautifully done.

[278] watching that.

[279] And like such Netflix?

[280] Netflix, white lines.

[281] It's so it's like got that time period, but also Ibiza is so beautiful.

[282] Yes.

[283] It's got like it's got a lot going on.

[284] I love it.

[285] You know what it has going on?

[286] It's really relaxing.

[287] The pronunciation being Abiza.

[288] Ibiza.

[289] Ibiza.

[290] There's a similar one because you know it's that thing where the is very smart of Netflix where you go on and you're immediately watching trailers.

[291] It's so smart So much But doesn't it suck you into things You would have never watched before?

[292] It's very smart I don't play that shit It's smart, it's smart It drives me fucking crazy Yeah well you know what it is There's a couple shows I do not want to see at all So you have to speed through it Like panic mode So that you're like I can't hear that voice I just put it on mute Try that Oh Wait what But there's a You might not have it on your remote My remote's kind of like a newfangled.

[293] It's pretty, you know, it reflects my wealth, my remote.

[294] But there's a show on that I bring this up because there was something I would have normally never watched.

[295] It's a show called Nadia's Time to Eat.

[296] And it's a British woman.

[297] And she is a mother of either three or four kids.

[298] She's young.

[299] And she's like, no one has time for anything these days.

[300] I'm going to make all the, I'm going to show you these recipes that are super simple.

[301] and delicious so you have more time to hang out with your family instead of coming home from work spending all this time making food and then like being exhausted and whatever and these hacks they kind of present it like their like recipe hacks but they're fascinating like she does this thing where she puts like these kind of rice noodles in these little individual like sealable mason jars and you can pre -make all this stuff so that when you come home and you just put in the refrigerator we come home from work you just put hot water in each one and they basically, it has like a faux, P -H -O, not F -A -O -X.

[302] Fah?

[303] Fah, yeah.

[304] Is that how you pronounce it?

[305] I think it's Fah.

[306] I only know how to pronounce it, B -A -F -A.

[307] I mean, so anyway.

[308] That looks great, yeah.

[309] I love cooking shows.

[310] That sounds perfect.

[311] It's so good and all this stuff she makes.

[312] She also then goes and, like, it's just a very well -made British cooking show.

[313] It reminds me of Nijella a lot.

[314] Oh, Nijella cooks.

[315] What a beautiful show that was.

[316] Barefoot Contessa I love so much.

[317] Oh, yeah.

[318] I know.

[319] Oh, my God.

[320] Ina Garden.

[321] She's amazing.

[322] She knows her stuff, right?

[323] Cool.

[324] Cooking shows should be definitely happening right now.

[325] I think that's, like, the best thing to leave on.

[326] Yes.

[327] It is that thing of like when you watch someone make a beautiful thing.

[328] You're not going to go back, eat the fucking dregs of the mustard and onion pretzel bites.

[329] Because then you just feel gross.

[330] You're going to make something.

[331] You know what I made Vince today?

[332] I'm emptying cheese its into my mouth, but watching out.

[333] Out of the corner of my eye.

[334] Right.

[335] Like, oh, that looks incredible.

[336] I could do that.

[337] That's so easy.

[338] So easy.

[339] I made Vince a mashed potato and cheese cassidia today.

[340] Yes.

[341] Delicious.

[342] I hope you deep fried it.

[343] What if I had a deep fry or in my kitchen?

[344] So basically you took a flour or corn tortilla.

[345] Flower tortilla.

[346] We have leftover mashed potatoes.

[347] Sprinkle some cheese in there.

[348] Yeah.

[349] Roll it up.

[350] Put it in the microwave?

[351] No, grilled that fucker.

[352] Yeah.

[353] great you know that's delicious and perfect hell yes let's see what else do you have um oh i just wanted to say i was so excited because i finally finally got my printer cartridge in the mail oh my god so i have a hard copy in my hand for literally the first time in like eight weeks where it's been driving me insane watching you read your stories just like squinting sticking your face and not i don't I don't care, but it has not looked comfortable.

[354] It is not.

[355] You sticking your face in the computer screen and squinting your eyes to read.

[356] The worst.

[357] Looks like it's not been fun for you.

[358] Well, and again, like we were talking about the banning.

[359] Sorry, I had to put that time because I was going blind.

[360] But then you're so close to the screen that you can't help but see yourself and judge yourself and have all kinds of weird lame -o, self -conscious feelings.

[361] We were just like, excuse me, did you hear that?

[362] I heard it and oh shit sorry Georgia just did the thing where she lifted up the side of her shirt and burped into her shirt I was being polite you're thinking of others in this time of COVID -19 and I appreciate it I have been with a guy 24 -7 too long it is getting gross you know he wipes his fingers on his armpit in his armpit when he's like eating chips and like at least use your sock so burping into my t -shirt is was really polite of me that's the kind of thing that you wouldn't think about until someone else witnesses you do it like you you just be like no what i didn't like you wouldn't even think you were doing it until you do it and get caught doing it sorry divins love you you're the greatest and i think it's the cutest thing otherwise we probably wouldn't be together if things like that annoyed me you know like when things that when things you think are cute with a guy or a you know a partner but if you're like if i didn't like you that would be annoying yes but i must love you because i think that's adorable yes that's a good way to frame it and go ahead and hold on to that framework eight months from now when his armpits are filled with chito dust and you're like what the fuck and all we have love to eat are fucking mashed potato casadias.

[363] You're trying to make the, hey look, I shape these mashed potatoes into casidias.

[364] It's all, there's no tortillas left.

[365] It's all casadias.

[366] Isn't that amazing?

[367] I mean, it's all mashed potato.

[368] It's a sculpture.

[369] Oh, I wanted to, so there, okay, I have one more thing.

[370] Yeah.

[371] There is a woman.

[372] She's an actress.

[373] Can I guess?

[374] Yeah.

[375] Just kidding.

[376] I thought you were serious.

[377] I was like, oh my God, do you know about that?

[378] What if I guessed?

[379] That would be amazing.

[380] her name is Rianne Barreto B -A -R -R -E -T -O And out of nowhere she starts tagging me in this thing And it turns out she's as actress And she found out about us from her director Who wanted She had to learn an American accent for this role she was doing Oh no Yeah and her director Pippa was like You should listen to my favorite murder You'll get like a real accent And so she did and she said she became a huge fan And so she won like the She won the American Vocal Fry Award No, she won the fucking special jury award for U .S. dramatic acting at fucking Sundance.

[381] And she thanked us in her fucking in her acceptance speech.

[382] That's fucking right.

[383] The movie is called, hold on.

[384] What is the fuck is going on?

[385] The movie's called Cher, S -H -A -R -E.

[386] And then she went on fucking, and then she sent me the clip.

[387] She went on Seth Myers and talked about us.

[388] What?

[389] And he's like, so you got help from a podcast.

[390] And she's like, yeah, my favorite murder.

[391] Thanks Karen and Georgia.

[392] And like, on Seth Myers talk show.

[393] So thank you, Rihanna.

[394] Everyone go watch the movie share.

[395] And congratulations.

[396] And see if you can hear our voices.

[397] It's amazing.

[398] It's not easy for it.

[399] As bad as American, oftentimes, Americans' version of British accents are, as a person who watches a fuck ton of British television, you can see a British actor when they don't hire American actors and they get a British actor who's like, I got this, don't worry about it.

[400] And they don't got it.

[401] It's the funniest thing.

[402] Because it is so about cadence and rhythm and casual, like casualness maybe.

[403] I can't explain it.

[404] It's just like you just know it's a British actor doing an American act.

[405] You just know it.

[406] same way that it the other way.

[407] It's hilarious.

[408] I love it.

[409] Oh, that's so cool.

[410] We're helping, we're helping cinema.

[411] Someone.

[412] We're helping someone out.

[413] Oh, I mean, it must have been good if she won an award for it.

[414] So, I mean.

[415] Thank you.

[416] Thank you.

[417] Thank you and you're welcome.

[418] So you're welcome.

[419] What if the whole thing was like that?

[420] It's like, you go to watch the movie and it's the most upsetting voice of all time.

[421] She just is supposed to be like the most annoying person that's ever lived.

[422] She's like, you guys help me so much.

[423] Oh, my God.

[424] I got so much.

[425] Thank you so much because I got the background of what a really irritating girl is like, not like this, but like you.

[426] I couldn't get it because I'm not irritating.

[427] Oh, that was a little cockney.

[428] That was good.

[429] Oh, I wanted to say, the guy that's doing my dad's floors, his name is Dave Cooney, and he's the one that's the murderer, you know.

[430] And I didn't say his name.

[431] when I told that story last time Not everyone wants to be named Not everyone and maybe he still doesn't Too bad Dave Thank you so much because my sister says The floors look unbelievable Like I bet he got a fucking A fucking one up or whatever it's called Oh yeah he got the extra special floor treatment You think Jim got the favorite award Jim Jim paid for like the shittiest kind of hardwood he could find And I'm like let's give him the one up one let's give them the one up that was nice of them that actually makes me think I watched the movie the original Arthur movie last night with Deadly Moore so good that if you are looking for a laugh and if you haven't seen it you might not like it it it's definitely very 80s comedy but god damn it that thing is back to back hard jokes it's like Liza Manelli and it's so good she's killer and they you believe they really fall in love like they you can tell there's true chemistry there's something really happening but it is that it's so charming and of course john gilgood is one of his you know he's so he's the butler that's hopson he's so hilarious it's just such a like laugh right if you need if you need something like that that might have been one of the original ones that made me love fake drunk people yes like i like when you're when you do fake drunk, Karen.

[432] Arthur being fake drunk.

[433] He's perfect at it.

[434] And there is a scene where it's after Hobson dies, he goes and sits in a bar and there's a drunk with him.

[435] And then he goes, oh, that's terrible.

[436] The drunk is so hilarious and believable.

[437] The two of them being drunk together, you never for one second go, oh, this is two actors playing drunk.

[438] Yeah.

[439] You're like, I am in a bar.

[440] These guys are shit -faced.

[441] It's so realistic.

[442] That's what I thought.

[443] I love watching fake drunk love it oh sorry this is just one more thing you should see this fucking piece of paper with insane writing all over it it just says printer underlined twice tell the printer story it's amazing guys i got my printer cartridges the end um last week the live show that we uh put up for you guys was from oakland 2018 and that was the show where my sister and nora my niece were there and Nora came out on perfect cue and did a cartwheel and ran away.

[444] Excellent.

[445] My sister, if anyone has video of that, that they can send to our website or to Twitter or to Instagram or anywhere, my sister would love you forever.

[446] That's all she wants in the world.

[447] And I think that at some point someone either had a picture or something, maybe video.

[448] Yeah.

[449] If you would resend, also because she's, Nora is now like a foot taller and a teenager who's like by I'll be in my room and times are changing so rapidly and we just need to hold close the memories that we have.

[450] We can only stare at her like third grade picture so much but that was that moment was so hilarious and also my sister was backstage so she didn't get to see it.

[451] Right right right right so if anyone has it we'll track it down.

[452] Okay if you would please and I think that is yep travels by narrow boat check boom I think that's all we have that's it I wanted to thank you to Cosmo.

[453] They've, like, put us on a couple nice lists recently.

[454] Oh, yeah.

[455] And I said no gifts, too.

[456] Was in Cosmo.

[457] Oh, right.

[458] Hey.

[459] Speaking of, I said no gifts.

[460] This week, a comedic writer and performer Lamar Woods from New Girl and Single Parents was with Bridger.

[461] And what's really interesting is that he grew up Jehovah's Witness.

[462] So he had to bring a gift or not bring a gift.

[463] And they talk about gifts.

[464] He literally lived.

[465] said no gifts from gone that's right that's in exactly right news yes boom cool stephen do you stephen do you want to report on anything um from the purrcast oh well we are talking to somebody who rescued a hairless cat so that's always fun what's that hairless cat's name uh georgie named after jason alexander in sunfield george georgie georgie the chicken wing yeah oh oh i love it yeah look i didn't not look up hairl Cat Rescue Today, but I didn't Yeah.

[466] You got to do something.

[467] Right.

[468] With our time.

[469] And if looking up hairless cat rescues does it for you?

[470] I really did that.

[471] Do it.

[472] Who's first?

[473] Karen's first.

[474] Karen Kilgariff?

[475] Okay.

[476] Then I will slow down on the rosé.

[477] But only a little.

[478] Just downshift into second gear.

[479] Okay.

[480] This week, this is one I've wanted to do for a while.

[481] and a listener named Anya Whitesman wrote in to suggest it as well.

[482] Thank you, Anya.

[483] And I got this information from MurderPedia, Wikipedia, and the website Medium.

[484] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.

[485] Absolutely.

[486] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash?

[487] Exactly.

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[489] But did you know that they also power in -person sales?

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[496] With Shopify, we have a powerful partner.

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[498] Connect with customers in line and online.

[499] Do retail right with Shopify.

[500] Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify .com slash murder.

[501] Important note, that promo code is all lowercase.

[502] Go to Shopify .com slash murder to take your retail business to the next level today.

[503] That's Shopify .com slash murder.

[504] Goodbye.

[505] Which always has great stuff.

[506] Now they have, and maybe for a while they have had, they have a section called the crime historian that focuses on like kind of older true crime stories and so that was the article written by a writer named Ash Woods.

[507] I used that as well for the story and I don't know if you know this the angel makers of Nagreve.

[508] No. You've never heard this?

[509] No. Oh shit girl.

[510] Okay.

[511] So this takes place in Hungary.

[512] So Nagreve I had to look up one of those websites where you press a button and you can hear someone pronounce it and it was like nagrieve nagariv so i'm i'm definitely pronouncing it in inaccurately but now i'm i'm about to go ahead and just totally destroy some last names because i couldn't enter them into this website like it wouldn't help me so it's going to be phonetic visual phonetics and it's going to be wrong so my worry everyone will correct you yes don't worry it's going to give us all something to do in the pandemic them.

[513] Don't worry.

[514] Guys, and especially you sensitive Hungarians out there, listen up because you're about to have something to email and Twitter about.

[515] Okay, so this story is so fascinating.

[516] I wanted to do it a couple times, but I don't know it, yeah.

[517] Okay.

[518] So the year is 1911.

[519] Okay.

[520] It's kind of long ago, all things considered.

[521] And we go to, this is a small, impoverished farming village in Nagru.

[522] Hungary.

[523] I'm putting that.

[524] I don't know why.

[525] That sounds right.

[526] I'm rolling the R though, which I don't think is.

[527] Nagrive.

[528] Nagrive.

[529] That's how she says it.

[530] Ah, yeah, yeah.

[531] Nagariv.

[532] Anyway, it's 60 miles southeast of Budapest, and a young wife named Mrs. Takaks.

[533] That's definitely wrong.

[534] T -A -K -A -C -S.

[535] Okay, she goes to the local midwife in the middle of the night.

[536] Sorry, Stephen.

[537] I burped right in the middle of that line.

[538] Can you please do that into your shirt?

[539] Excuse me, ma 'am.

[540] Okay.

[541] So Mrs. Tucker knocks on the local midwife's door in the middle of the night.

[542] She's just been beaten up by her husband.

[543] Her alcoholic husband is just beating the shit out of her.

[544] So she has to go, the midwife is the only person that's, like, close to a doctor.

[545] Yeah.

[546] In the village.

[547] And she has to go there for medical treatment.

[548] So the midwife is a woman named Julia Fazakis Or phasecas or a lot of other things I think Fazakis sounds good Fazakis is what we're going to go with It feels right to me So she's used to helping people at all hours of the night Because she's basically the go -to person But she doesn't just treat Mrs. Takak's wounds She also tells her that she knows how she can take care of her husband for good so let's talk about Julia Vazakis for a second she she moves to Nagariv in 1911 she's a middle -aged midwife and her husband Julius had disappeared before she got there under mysterious circumstances and no one knows where she's from or what her background is but she's been recommended to be the midwife for this village by several doctors who know that she has a medical expertise and know what she's doing.

[549] And since Nagraev does not have a doctor or anybody nearby at all, they're happy to have her.

[550] So Mrs. Tucker sits in Julia's kitchen and watches her make a secret concoction.

[551] The midwife puts fly paper into a pot of water, boils it down, extracting its arsenic.

[552] Oh, fuck.

[553] And then she bottles that arsenic water and sends Mrs. Takak's home with it.

[554] That's smart.

[555] Two days later, the midwife watches Mr. Takak's funeral procession from her front porch.

[556] He's reportedly died from a heart attack.

[557] And from that moment on, life in the little village of Nagraiv takes a wild and morbid turn.

[558] Okay.

[559] So in the early 1900s, Hungary, arranged marriages are.

[560] very common that's basically kind of how it is the women usually are much younger than the men it has nothing to do with love or attraction or anything it's mostly just a practical deal the families of the girls and women they want to get rid of the daughters it's just an extra mouth to feed yeah and the men who are who do very difficult manual labor all day long they want someone to have babies with them.

[561] They want someone to cook and clean for them.

[562] They basically want their own manual laborer at home.

[563] Yeah, it's like literally an arrangement.

[564] It's not a marriage.

[565] It's just kind of how we keep everything going in the village.

[566] So, not a ton of romance happening in Nagraev, apparently.

[567] Or the surrounding area.

[568] I mean, I'm sure there was for sure.

[569] But this was kind of like the standard, and it was what people were used to.

[570] Yeah.

[571] So there's also a problem in in this village particularly the majority of the men that like women are just kind of there to do their bidding there's not there's not a lot of respect for women this is not a matriarchal society in any way and a lot of them are alcoholics and they work really hard they drink really hard and beating their wife is not that big of a deal a deal it's just kind of standard fair and also they're most of them are very very poor so there's a lot of stressors and there's a lot of things to be escaping from and drinking about and so it you know your wife becomes you know basically what you take out your frustrations on there it's just very common it's kind of the oppressive cycle of poverty and they're all caught in it but in 1914 world war one starts and so almost all the able -bodied men of the village are sent off to fight and so all All these young wives and women are alone for the first time.

[572] And they have to now work the fields.

[573] And they're the ones that then have to go and sell and trade the crops and keep, like, keep everything going and then and still manage the households.

[574] So they, they basically have to take over everything.

[575] Yeah.

[576] It's a ton of work, but it's the most freedom they've ever had.

[577] They're like, this is great.

[578] We're not getting fucking beaten.

[579] Yeah.

[580] And we fucking, we're in charge.

[581] And it's actually, we're actually very.

[582] capable.

[583] I was going to say, and they're thriving, but that's an editorial spin.

[584] We don't know that that's the truth.

[585] But I would think that it would be kind of amazing to be like, suddenly you don't have this oppression and you maybe even understand a little more.

[586] You're out there working the field all day and then you come back.

[587] And then you're kind of like, we just have to keep it going.

[588] But you find it's like, I think what a lot, it happened to a lot of women in World War II when they got to step up.

[589] And they were suddenly working in factories.

[590] and they were suddenly making machinery and using, you know, heavy machinery and going, yeah, I can do this.

[591] This isn't a mystery.

[592] This isn't all that hard.

[593] Yeah.

[594] Or it's hard and I can do it.

[595] I have it in me to do it.

[596] I'm not a dainty flower.

[597] So, right.

[598] Okay, so because Nagrieve is this isolated little village, the Hungarian army decides to build some POW camps there to hold Russian prisoners.

[599] Oh, dear.

[600] Yeah.

[601] So now the women of the village who are free from their shitty, mean, drunk husbands, and that have this kind of new independence, they start having affairs with these POWs.

[602] Is it about to get sexy?

[603] That's what I fucking thought.

[604] I mean, I like to, just imagine how hot it would be.

[605] You're married to some 58 -year -old farmer.

[606] He's gone.

[607] Yeah.

[608] And suddenly there's just like a hot Russian 20 -year -old that, you know, that, you're not.

[609] happen to get caught.

[610] It's just kind of standing hanging off the chain link I mean, I'm loving the visuals of this.

[611] Are you going to write a romance novel?

[612] Why not?

[613] So essentially they start having these affairs and now the downside, of course, is there's all kinds of unwanted pregnancies.

[614] Oh, shit.

[615] Of course.

[616] Because it's still 1914.

[617] Nobody's, everybody's like, well, we'll take care of it.

[618] What was that?

[619] Nothing.

[620] what did you just I did it into my shirt so you couldn't hear it whispered it to your shoulder a little secret okay so of course nobody like these children can't be born because no one has the money everyone's working their ass off this is not this is not the time to start having love children and shit probably doesn't go go down well when you've had an affair outside of your marriage and then when your husband comes back from war and you're like what yes our new child so of course, the women of the village turned to Julia Fizakis, the midwife for help.

[621] So, of course, she knows how to give abortions because she's a midwife and they are illegal and hungry at the time.

[622] But Julia doesn't give a fuck because she's a classic midwife who's like, hey, how about some reproductive rights?

[623] Hey, how about you don't have to have a baby if you don't want to?

[624] She gains her reputation as an abortionist.

[625] She's actually been arrested for 10 different times between 1911 and 1921.

[626] Wow.

[627] But because she's Negreve's only doctor, the authorities always let her go.

[628] Uh -huh.

[629] And because deep down they know this is a fact of life.

[630] Okay.

[631] Anyway.

[632] Right.

[633] Right.

[634] So as World War I comes to an end in 1918, the men of Negreve begin to return home in waves.

[635] And many of them have been wounded and of course all of them have been traumatized by what they've seen, the horrors of war.

[636] So it definitely doesn't help their anger issues or their drinking problems or any of the stuff that was happening before.

[637] Plus, now these women have tasted freedom and independence and they, and they got a little that borshti taste that they like so much.

[638] Yeah.

[639] So the domestic disputes and the domestic violence returns with all, everybody coming back.

[640] And with these adjustments where the women.

[641] are suddenly like, yeah, no, it's not going to work like that anymore.

[642] Yeah.

[643] So as more and more of these women of the village air their grievances to their trusted midwife, Julia, she starts offering them the same solution that she offered Mrs. Takacs back in 1911, which is a vial of poison to be mixed in with their husband's food or drink.

[644] So slowly, more and more women take her up on this offer.

[645] Julia tells the women that the arsenic cannot be traced in a decomposing corps, and that they're so that would ensure that they would always be safe from getting into any kind of trouble and because that there aren't any other medical experts in the village or anywhere nearby to examine the bodies all of these deaths are ruled as heart attacks so as the word spreads amongst the women julia's customer base grows julia you got to be cool i mean you can't you can't solve everything by killing I've said it to you, Georgia, a thousand times.

[646] But in this situation where suddenly there is an out for this oppression and this kind of like in a spot where women never had any agency whatsoever, they feel a little bit.

[647] And suddenly they're like, you're not fucking taking that freedom back from me. And it really is this kind of like this solution that feels very justified to them.

[648] Yeah.

[649] So Julia has more and more women of the village coming to her in secret.

[650] and she charges them on a sliding scale.

[651] It's purely based on what they can afford.

[652] And the number of deaths in Negriv slowly climbs and climbs.

[653] And grown men who otherwise seem completely healthy start dropping like flies.

[654] And no one can explain why.

[655] So, of course, the townspeople are superstitious.

[656] They immediately think witchcraft is a play.

[657] Oh, shit.

[658] A lot of the young men noticed that the men who, who are dying are married so a bunch of the single men won't won't get married and the marriage rate takes a nose dive wow they think it's like that's the connection cause and effect yeah exactly it's simply the marriage and some do guess that julia might be involved but they have no proof of it one of the clergymen in town is later quoted as saying the superstitious peasants are terrified of julia they believe she has supernatural powers and as her official capacity is nurse and midwife, it gives her access to every family.

[659] She dominates the entire district.

[660] These villages gentlemen are utterly dominated by women and the men are all afraid for their lives.

[661] Amen.

[662] I can't help but smile to see the shoe on the other foot.

[663] But there are some rules that Julie has established to keep this growing secret network of what they will later term as angel makers a secret.

[664] A secret.

[665] Yeah.

[666] So here's Julia's rules.

[667] You are only allowed to be in the circle if you're unhappily married.

[668] No single women, no women married to good men.

[669] So I guess that's up to Julia to decide who's good.

[670] You can only kill abusive husbands.

[671] You cannot kill good men.

[672] You can't kill women.

[673] You cannot kill children.

[674] How decent of you.

[675] And you cannot talk about the angel makers with anyone who isn't in it or with anyone who doesn't mean.

[676] the requirements to join so it's like a hungarian female fight club but where the fighting leads to death and the person who's in it in the fight doesn't know that they're right in the fight right so not like that at all anyway so essentially this this works for a while and people keep it secret for a while and while these these perfectly healthy and relatively young men are dropping dead, the whole village starts buzzing with fear, the people who are not in the circle or the circuit.

[677] But Julia, the demand is so great for her services that she has to get someone else to help her.

[678] So she pulls in a local woman named Susie Ola, or Ola, not sure.

[679] Years before, when Susie was just 18, she poisoned her first husband the same way that Julia is poisoning, boiling fly paper getting that arsenic and lacing her first husband's food with the poison.

[680] So she knows how to get it.

[681] She knows what Julia is doing.

[682] And she basically helps Julia collect and bottle the arsenic to sell it.

[683] And Susie also brings another crucial benefit to the table.

[684] Her son is the coroner of Noghiv.

[685] Smart.

[686] So he's in charge of determining cause of death.

[687] And so these poison husbands are being written off as having died of heart attack, disease, drinking themselves to death, in one case, drowning after one of the bodies is thrown into a nearby river.

[688] So it's kind of the perfect crime.

[689] And it goes on for the next 10 years.

[690] Wow.

[691] How many men are there in the town?

[692] For real.

[693] They don't go through all of them?

[694] Yeah, I think, well, they go through a bunch of them.

[695] So it couldn't have been a tiny village.

[696] you know it wasn't like 200 people obviously right but um but it goes on for 10 years with nobody saying anything and and no one getting caught but with that amount of unchallenged power the women begin to get reckless and greedy yeah they do yeah just like all human beings it's how it goes so they start to deviate from julia's strict rules and they start poisoning parents who've grown too old and are hard to care for they they poison children that they can't feed anymore.

[697] No, no, no, no. And they poison siblings they don't like.

[698] So they just fucking start going crazy.

[699] Wow.

[700] Start killing everyone.

[701] Yes.

[702] They just are just like we've got the solution and we've become like immune to the effects of this and now this is just how we take care of business.

[703] When some of the women discover they can inherit land and money from relatives, they start killing their relatives too.

[704] So essentially what begins as what some could rationalize as a vigilante act of self -defense becomes simple unchecked power and with unchecked power it brings out one of the worst qualities of humanity greed.

[705] So as that basically they break the pact and they just start fucking killing people and going insane.

[706] So the villagers that the ones with Good husbands and normal families are like, what to fuck?

[707] Everyone's dying.

[708] So they start writing letters to local authorities accusing the village women of killing their relatives.

[709] But there's no hard evidence.

[710] So the police can't really do anything.

[711] But the gossip is spreading.

[712] So surrounding villages are like, they know what they're up to.

[713] They know what's actually going on.

[714] The exact number of deaths is unknown, but it's estimated to be around 300.

[715] Holy shit.

[716] By the time authorities step in.

[717] Negreve locally earns the nickname the murder district.

[718] Perfect.

[719] Yeah.

[720] Now it's 1929.

[721] Hungary is conducting its 10 -year census.

[722] Oh, dear.

[723] So when they get their info back from Negrieve, the officials notice something very strange in those numbers.

[724] What's that?

[725] The death rate, so the last time they did the census in 1919, the birth rate was about 340 to you know there are 340 more births than there were deaths okay now babies only have a 36 baby lead over the deaths they oh no it's almost the same they close that gap they close that gap in a way that is very unnatural and unlikely yeah and so that's when hungarian officials decide it's time to launch an investigation there's many deaths as there are births as they start looking looking into it, they notice that the overwhelming majority of deaths are otherwise healthy adult men.

[726] Yeah.

[727] So around the same time, Negreve's pre -center, which is a word I've never heard before, but it's a person who leads the congregation at church in song or prayer.

[728] So it's kind of like a canter, I guess.

[729] Well, is that right?

[730] Yes.

[731] Thank you.

[732] So this man drunkenly abuses his wife.

[733] The wife goes to her neighbor, who is.

[734] um an angel maker she's in the circuit secret circuit named mrs zabo and um mrs zabo tells the sells the woman some arsenic but when the woman tries to poison her husband by pouring the arsenic into his wine the husband catches her yeah she immediately confesses um and immediately turns on mrs zabo and says she's the one that so sold me the arsenic fucking honey snitches get stitches get candy So the police go to Mrs. Zobo.

[735] They question her.

[736] She immediately cracks.

[737] And she doesn't only confess to poisoning her late husband and her brother.

[738] Oh.

[739] But she gives the police Julia Fazzakis.

[740] Is that how I pronounced it?

[741] Julia Fazzakis and Susie Ola's names.

[742] Not cool.

[743] Right?

[744] So everybody turns, which would make sense too because this is such a strange, it almost feels to me like mass hysteria mass murder hysteria you know what I mean where it's like I don't know what I was doing this person told me to do it it's like the the level of okay with something that is not okay got raised to like it's fine right we're all we're all just getting rid of the people that are bumming us out and it's like and everyone else is doing it it's a normal thing here yeah a year 10 years 10 years so julia and susie are promptly arrested and they're brought in for questioning they both deny it smart they don't immediately turn on everybody but because they've worked their stories out we've had 10 years to work the get the stories stick together um and they stick to them and they convince the police um that they that they have nothing to do with anything enough to be released but they're being watched so the police are like okay you can go but they actually have them followed so then julia goes and knocks on all of the angel makers doors in every woman in the circuit and she's just like, this whole thing is we're shutting it down.

[745] This is over.

[746] She doesn't know.

[747] Yeah, exactly.

[748] She doesn't know she's being followed.

[749] So she basically just leads the police to every woman in the angel maker's secret group.

[750] Not cool.

[751] So there's two different stories of what happened next because it was so long ago.

[752] Either a local medical student finds a drowned body of one of the victims, that one of the angel makers threw in the river, tests it, discovers traces of arsenic in its fingernails and hair and then reports it to the authorities or one of the ringleaders of the angel makers, a woman named Balant Sordas, travels to Budapest.

[753] Yes, thank you.

[754] And Abifa.

[755] Ibiza.

[756] It's Abiza.

[757] She travels to Budapest, and she asks a chemist if arsenic can be traced in dead bodies and he tells her that it can be found in fingernails and hair either way she's like whoops yeah she's like now when i poisoned my husband excuse me i what i meant to say is i'm asking for a friend either way the angel makers of negreeve they learned arsenic can be traced and which contradicts what julia told all of them so they freak out and a group of them come up with this plan.

[758] So the next night 13 of them gather in the local cemetery and start digging up tombstones and swapping them around so that when the police come and exhume the bodies they won't find poison in the people they think were murdered because it will actually be the wrong coffin.

[759] That's smart.

[760] Genius.

[761] That's diabolical.

[762] It's deeply diabolical but it is a good idea but that.

[763] Very smart.

[764] Very smart.

[765] don't very bad don't do that don't stop it that's why they make great stones so heavy can't just go switching them around but but here's the thing it doesn't even matter because the police are already on to all of it so they basically catch these women the angel makers in the act of doing it they were only able to switch a couple headstones they must have been pretty heavy back then too yeah um they catch them in the act most of the women run they real the authorities realize they're dealing with with some some serious some serious criminals here so they just start exhuming the bodies right then and whoa they pull up 50 bodies and they test them all and of those 46 test positive for arsenic oh that's like an a plus that's like a that's a that's a 95 % if I'm not wrong and I am about you're good at math thanks everyone knows that but I just like think about the four guys who like died however natural causes yeah can you fucking bury me back up and her wife's like i didn't kill him she's the wife's like i'm the one this whole time that's going you guys are going insane you guys you're drunk with power stop it i pinky swore i didn't kill my husband how is that not enough for you my husband a promised me that uh he made me promise that i wouldn't kill him and b he made me promise i wouldn't exhume him and now look look where we are.

[766] And she sued the village of Nagreeve and she won.

[767] No, those are all lies.

[768] Okay, so when the police go to arrest Julia Fazakis, I've pronounced it differently every time.

[769] I'm panicked every time.

[770] One of them's got to be right.

[771] We're covering all the bases.

[772] She basically sees the cops coming toward her house and she downs a bottle of her own arsenic and dies before she can be arrested.

[773] Whoa.

[774] She's not playing.

[775] Goodbye.

[776] Bye.

[777] Of the 100 women arrested, 26 of them are put on trial.

[778] And 12 of those are found guilty and they receive prison sentences, seven of which are sentenced to life in prison.

[779] Eight of them are sentenced to death, including, yeah, including Susie Ola and her sister Lydia.

[780] Some other women, including Balant Zordas, kill themselves in prison.

[781] Wow.

[782] Yeah.

[783] So it's the fantasy ends.

[784] It all falls apart.

[785] And so a couple movies have been made about The Angel Makers, including a 2002 experimental Hungarian film called Huckle.

[786] It looks like it's pronounced H -U -K -K -K -L -E and the 2005 documentary, The Angel Makers.

[787] Wow.

[788] And there's a book called The Angel Makers by Jessica Gregson.

[789] And I'm not going to be able to pronounce this.

[790] Do it.

[791] It's T -I -S -Z -A -Z -E -E.

[792] So I'll say Tizazug, a social history of a murder epidemic by Bodo Bella.

[793] And those are two books you can read about this insane story of the angel makers of Negrieve.

[794] That was crazy.

[795] Where did you hear about that originally?

[796] I've never heard of that.

[797] That is like a classic one that gets mentioned on the, what's the website we love that does the lists?

[798] Rancor.

[799] That's like one that's on Ranking.

[800] That's like one that's on Ranking.

[801] yeah yeah yeah um and it's basically kind of like i always didn't want to do the research because it's old and i was always like do we even have names do we even know the people that are at play here right um but yeah it's hard to find details and then it's also hard to verify anything yeah it sounds like oh it's something that happened in the hills but we're not exactly sure but no this one is true and crazy it's just like yeah crazy little village where everyone went i can't believe murder crazy for 10 fucking years for how many people was like they suspected like 200 people were killed 300 300 there's no there's no number for sure but it's around 300 I bet you it's higher they called it the murder district wow you're just trying to get from your cart your donkey and cart from one village to the other they're like don't go by the murder district don't go by and and and fucking physically abuse anyone in the murder district.

[802] See, because it's, that's why I like the story, too.

[803] Because when you first read it, you're like, ha, good.

[804] But it's like, no, that's a natural reaction of like when things feel unfair and then revenge is like feels like the best answer.

[805] But it never is because it's that unchecked power thing that, no one's immune to that the effect of unchecked power.

[806] Everything gets out of hand eventually.

[807] Yes.

[808] When there's, when there's too much arsenic.

[809] Where are they getting all that fly paper?

[810] I asked you.

[811] Yeah.

[812] Yeah, you think that the fucking, whatever, the fucking dude who works at the drugstore selling all the fly paper would be like, this is odd.

[813] Or they're like sending away to the Sears catalog for it.

[814] Or just like, no one's checking this at all.

[815] Hundreds of rules of fly paper.

[816] I bet there were a lot of flies in that village too.

[817] The flies were scared shitless.

[818] All right.

[819] So I first heard about this story like two weeks ago when I was tagged by a bunch of people, thank you, on Instagram, on a Instagram called History Photographed.

[820] And they do these cool photos and then they tell you the story about whatever it's about.

[821] And it's a lot of stuff I've never heard of, which is fun.

[822] A lot of it's made up.

[823] Shit.

[824] And here's one of those stories.

[825] Entirely fabricated history.

[826] Oops.

[827] Oops.

[828] Oh, well, here we go.

[829] Here we go.

[830] So this is the story of Hans Schmars.

[831] the first and only priest to be executed in the United States.

[832] Oh, shit.

[833] Have we heard that?

[834] Oh, Schmidt.

[835] Sorry.

[836] And we're off.

[837] And here we go.

[838] No, I've never heard of this.

[839] Yeah, I didn't either.

[840] It's very odd.

[841] And I got info from the Daily News by an article by David Kragix, Kragisek, a ranker article by Harris, Tempus.

[842] What's up?

[843] Wikipedia, Murderpedia, and all that's interesting article.

[844] And then there's also a book that's called The Trunk Dipped in Blood, and it's five sensational murder cases of the early 20th century by Mark Grossman.

[845] Nice.

[846] So here we go.

[847] Let's start.

[848] On September 5th, 1913, so it's the same time your shit's going on.

[849] Ooh, like, yeah.

[850] At the same time, across the world.

[851] I love it.

[852] I love it.

[853] In New Jersey, yeah.

[854] So on September 5th, 1913, two kids on the New Jersey side of the Hudson River come across the torso of a woman, the upper torso.

[855] Oh, so the chest of a woman.

[856] And the next day, about three miles down river at Weehawken, the lower torso of the same woman is found and it's in a pillowcase.

[857] And over the next several days, authorities find a total of six different female body parts.

[858] And they're able to piece them together and find that all the body parts are from the same woman.

[859] An autopsy at the body parts tells police that they're investigating the murder of a woman who's under 30 years old, around 5 foot 4, between 120 and 130 pounds, and the autopsy also reveals that the woman had prematurely given birth shortly before she was murdered.

[860] So that could have been from an abortion, which was illegal at the time.

[861] Yeah.

[862] Okay, but since the pieces were found on the New Jersey side of the Hudson, so technically it should have been their case.

[863] But instead, the case, which is now known as the Hudson River Mystery, is turned over to The New York PD, because the New Jersey police are like, well, both of the packages that were found on our side contain the body parts that contain the body parts have a type of rock called schist rock that's very common in Manhattan but never found in New Jersey.

[864] So they're like, well, the crime was probably committed in New York.

[865] You guys can have the case, which is like a twist on how it usually is.

[866] Yeah, I was just going to say, usually it's like this is our area stay out of it.

[867] But they're kind of like...

[868] I wonder if it's because maybe the NYPD was so advanced at that time.

[869] They were like, you guys should probably take this because...

[870] Yeah, because clearly it's some horrific situation.

[871] Yeah, it needs all the help it can get.

[872] So it goes to the NYPD.

[873] The investigation is assigned to the Manhattan chief of detectives.

[874] His name is Joseph Faroe.

[875] And he is famous for beginning the new era and police science in a case in 1911, which was the first time fingerprints evidence alone led to a criminal conviction.

[876] So he's like the first, he went to Scotland Yard, learned all about fingerprinting and like brought it back here and was like, I swear this works, you guys.

[877] Yeah.

[878] Trust me. Trust me. You have to believe me. So Detective Farrow, he uses that the pillowcase that one of the body parts was found in, which is monogram with the letter A, as well as the newspaper that the body was wrapped in, which was dated August 31st.

[879] And he takes the tag in the monogram pillowcase and traces it back to a Manhattan furniture dealer named George Sacks.

[880] So they find the receipt that coincides with the pillowcase purchase.

[881] And when they show the receipt to Mr. Sacks, he is like, oh yeah, I totally remember that sale.

[882] It was made to a man who called himself A. Van Dyke.

[883] He paid in cash and he asked to have the items, including the pillowcase, deliver to his apartment.

[884] And he gives them the address to the apartment.

[885] Okay.

[886] So this leads them to the third floor apartment in an uptown building.

[887] And then when they question the building superintendent, he says that the apartment is occupied by a married couple and that the husband is a good looking man with a heavy German accent and he had given his name as H. Schmidt.

[888] After a three -day stakeout and no one is coming or going to the apartment, the inspector foro orders a detective to break into the apartment.

[889] Probably legal at the time.

[890] You ought to hope.

[891] So there, detectives fine, drop.

[892] of blood on the walls and on the iron bedposts and it looks like it's they've tried someone's tried to clean it up and the rest they find the rest of the newspaper that it used to wrap the body and then in a steamer trunk they find a large bloodstained knife a hand saw and they also find a bunch of letters from germany addressed to someone named anna ammuller so inspector furrow goes to the new york address on those letters and finds a couple who knew anna from germany they tell investigators that Anna had arrived in New York in 1908.

[893] She was 16 years old at the time.

[894] And now she worked as a servant at several places and a housekeeper.

[895] But her last job had been at St. Boniface Catholic Church on 47th and 2nd.

[896] And there, the senior pastor, Reverend John Braun, said that he had fired Anna on August 13th, which was like a month earlier before the body was found, not even.

[897] And he had fired her after only eight months on the job because he, quote, was not satisfied with her way of life and that she had then transferred to St. Joseph's Church, which is like, judgey.

[898] Judge much Catholics?

[899] Yes, they do.

[900] They sure do.

[901] So Reverend Braun was like, you know who you need to speak with is Anna's spiritual guide, who happened to be the former assistant pastor at that church.

[902] his name was Reverend Hans Schmidt and that both him and Anna now worked at St. Joseph's Church together.

[903] A spiritual guide.

[904] A spiritual guide.

[905] I thought you meant like a spiritualist, like a psychic or something.

[906] Maybe I don't really know.

[907] Well, I mean, he's a priest.

[908] They just met her.

[909] Probably.

[910] So the Inspector of Roe and his detectives go to St. Joseph's rectory where the senior pastor, Daniel Quinn, takes them into the parlor, where Han Schmidt is asleep and they wake him up and he's like oh fuck and he becomes hysterical and says I killed her I killed her because I loved her oh so he immediately admits to killing the woman that had been found in the Hudson River which was Anna Amuller and he then goes on to describe Anna's murder and dismemberment in detail his fellow priests who were like fucking napping too probably were like oh my god and look on in horror as he's taken into police custody wow just out with it right the second the second they knock on the door yeah awake opens his eyes and starts admitting to shit you know yep so let me tell you about han schmidt he's born in the biftha sorry let me tell you about ibiza schmidt he's born in the bavarian town of o'shafenberg to a Protestant father and a Catholic mother in 1881.

[911] And as a kid, he liked to dress up like clergyman.

[912] His, he would wear a cassock and collar.

[913] So like the priest's outfits.

[914] A priest dress.

[915] Yep.

[916] His mom would like hand make him these little priest outfits because he wanted to be one so bad.

[917] He was like, cosplaying priests.

[918] Not awe.

[919] Creepy.

[920] Stephen.

[921] Stephen.

[922] He was like, me too.

[923] 180 episodes Stephen busts in and that's what he's that's what you I thought it was on mute to be honest Well you weren't and now you're never going to live it down This is what Stephen does when he's on muted He's having some completely different experience to these stories than we are Aw Creepy little priest child That's so sweet Annabelle 3 coming to theaters So he makes his own altars at home And he pretends to carry out services in sacrament And he earns the nickname in town The Little Priest Oh, how cute So according to Hans He was also obsessed with blood And he used it in his fake religious rituals And he liked to spend free time At the slaughterhouse Watching the slaughter of pigs and cows By the local butcher Aw Stephen Stephen.

[924] You're mute now?

[925] No, this is bad.

[926] He doesn't agree.

[927] I mean, a kid like this.

[928] We've got issues, but they couldn't have known from just the priest outfit.

[929] Although creepy, not, you can't do anything about it.

[930] Slaughter house hobby?

[931] No, dude.

[932] And even the slaughter.

[933] What about the slaughterhouse hobby without the priest outfit?

[934] Like if they're separate.

[935] Even separate?

[936] Now we've got the unholy union where you've got a child that likes blood ritual.

[937] Good luck, good luck, everybody.

[938] Would you rather have a child become a butcher or a priest?

[939] That's the question you want to ask yourself.

[940] Butcher 1 ,000 percent.

[941] So, you weren't actually asking me. Sorry.

[942] No, I didn't think you answer.

[943] Let's all go on mute for the rest of this story.

[944] And he himself says that early on the side of blood stimulated his very first sexual arousals.

[945] so not great not chill so Stephen great job I'm sorry no I love it I'm sorry and he also claimed he was sexually abused by his older brothers so but that was according to him right so allegedly eventually Han Schmidt heads to seminary school and at 25 years old is ordained in 1904 and during parish assignments in the small villages Schmidt allegedly molests altar boys has affairs with several years old women and solicit sex workers.

[946] And meanwhile, parishioners and fellow priests are like over this dude.

[947] And they complain to him to the Monts, what's it called?

[948] Monsignor.

[949] Monsignor.

[950] Monsignor.

[951] And the bishop about his creative ways of saying mass and eccentric sermons.

[952] He just goes off book and make shit up.

[953] Yes.

[954] Oh, my God.

[955] I would die to see that.

[956] Why do you look so happy about it?

[957] I don't know because, you know why?

[958] All my memories, when you said Monsignor, we had an old priest named Monsignor Tillman, who was so boring, like, he would do the reading and then he would start the homily.

[959] And you were just like, ugh, like you couldn't focus because it was just like somebody who had been doing the same job for a long time and it was just like basically had a rhythm, a very boring rhythm to their voice.

[960] I will say this, so sorry to totally sidebar you, but I just had a recovered memory because I remember my mom.

[961] mom telling me that in the early 70s, Monsignor Tillman, when he was still a priest, a crazy person ran up and stabbed him during a, during church one day.

[962] And he survived it.

[963] Holy shit.

[964] Isn't that amazing?

[965] So he's kind of, he was like, he was a total bad.

[966] Waited for everyone to fall asleep.

[967] Yeah.

[968] He's just trying to keep everybody super calm at all times.

[969] But it's, it's the idea of a priest basically going to be super weird during a homily would be kind fascinating because it's like it's not like it's not like going to temple where it's like you interpret the Torah the way you want to interpret and tell stories and blah -bub you know it's like these are the prayers and this well we have the same I mean well it's just it it's very formalized and very it's very stuffy and strict and so by the book literally there's no improv in in the Catholic church they don't there's no yes anding Jesus as far as I know there's no yes the ending, Jesus.

[970] Oh my God.

[971] Okay.

[972] Sorry.

[973] That was no. Never apologized.

[974] Epic sidebar.

[975] Okay.

[976] It was amazing.

[977] So he goes out books, make shit up.

[978] And then no other parishes offer him an assignment after he fucking blows all those other ones.

[979] So in 1909, he immigrates to the U .S. He's like, let's try out these idiots.

[980] Yeah.

[981] His first assignment is at St. John's Roman Catholic Church in Louisville, Kentucky.

[982] But he pisses off this senior pastor with his weird methods and ultimately transfers to this to saint boniface's church in new york city where we were just at yeah in 1912 and um he scandalized the pastor there by claiming to believe in free love so he was just like oh back then doing his thing yeah no so this they're still not okay with that no this is where he meets our young Austrian housekeeper, Anna Amuller, or Amuler, she is gorgeous, these dark eyes, dark hair.

[983] She looks to me like Casey Wilson's great -grandmother.

[984] Oh.

[985] You know, from Happy Endings, and she does the podcast, Bitch Sesh.

[986] So just like this really striking features.

[987] And she works in the rectory as the housekeeper and in later conversations with alienists, which were old -timey psychiatrists, Hans Schmidt claims to have heard a voice from God ordering him to love Anna.

[988] So she first, I know, she first refuses his advances, but eventually they start having a sexual relationship.

[989] And at the same time, though, he's having an affair with a New York dentist named Ernest Mirate at the same time.

[990] So he's definitely down.

[991] He definitely believes in free love.

[992] Yeah, he's D -T -F.

[993] And he doesn't care about it.

[994] For the L -O -R -D.

[995] There it is.

[996] Yes.

[997] Yeah.

[998] Thank you.

[999] Later that year, Schmidt is transferred to the other church, St. Joseph's, in Harlem.

[1000] It's possible because someone at St. Boniface discovered his affair with Anna, but Schmidt and Anna continue their relationship.

[1001] And on February 26, 1913, they're, quote, married in a secret ceremony, but Schmidt performs it himself, so it's not real.

[1002] And there was three cups of blood involved.

[1003] yeah you throw one over your left shoulder one over your right shoulder um he writes their names on a marriage certificate and tells anna that he's going to leave the priesthood for her he were can i just say you are surrounded by darkness right now it's this happens every time and i don't think i have this you had this beautiful you like face the sunset and you have this beautiful glowing sun in your face you know as the sun sets and then now your room is just encased in darkness And now I'm performing a blood ritual.

[1004] I mean, it looks good.

[1005] Now, and now the big reveal.

[1006] Oh, there we go.

[1007] We have light.

[1008] We're back.

[1009] Okay, cool.

[1010] Great.

[1011] So soon after Anna, who's 21 years old at this time.

[1012] And Hans Schmidt, who's 31 years old at this time, Anna tells, or Anna tells Hans that she's pregnant.

[1013] And he then realizes that this could be the thing that finally, you know, gets him kick the fuck out of the church.

[1014] And it's possible he forced her to get an abortion.

[1015] We don't really know.

[1016] And he might have been doing them himself, actually.

[1017] No. No, I know.

[1018] And it's very dangerous and illegal at the time because when it's illegal, it's dangerous, friends.

[1019] Well, especially if you're a priest, it doesn't know what the fuck you're doing.

[1020] Right.

[1021] Yeah.

[1022] And then, oh, hello, Elvis.

[1023] So then on the night of September 2nd, 1913, Hans Schmidt goes to the uptown apartment that he had rented for him and Anna and he where they were posing as a married couple and he slashes her throat with a 12 inch butcher knife.

[1024] He also drinks her blood, violates her and uses a hacksaw to dismember her.

[1025] So he's totally out of his mind.

[1026] He's out of his fucking mind and always has been it seems.

[1027] Yeah.

[1028] He wraps each section of her body in newspaper and puts her lower body in one of her pillowcases that had that monogrammed A on it.

[1029] And he attaches those pieces of rock called schist to the body parts.

[1030] And then he boards a fairy seven different times, each time bringing a body part and dumping it overboard at different locations.

[1031] I know.

[1032] It's like this idea where it's the thing that drives me nuts is people hiding behind religion because everybody looks at that priest and goes, well, sure, he's saying a bunch of crazy shit during the homily, but, you know, he's a priest, so we have to listen to him.

[1033] We have to listen to him.

[1034] Back then, even more so, no one questioned, like, the Catholic Church and priests, they had this sway over everyone.

[1035] So I'm sure this young woman was like, she was probably honored that he was paying attention to her.

[1036] And, like, it's just, and meanwhile, he's totally out of his, he's just.

[1037] psychotic probably well and it's the same thing too where where they each place finds out that he's got issues and they and just like it would years later when the fucking sex scandal or the child molestation scandal comes out yep they just move him around yes so he never has to take responsibility he goes on to hurt other people it's and they move that they move him to poorer uh right churches and areas so that they you know it's people with less sway people with less I mean, it's just such a gross Tor, a terrible history.

[1038] It is.

[1039] Make your son become a butcher.

[1040] Always.

[1041] Also, they make good money.

[1042] Okay.

[1043] Tumping it overboard at different locations.

[1044] So, so back to the arrest, Schmitt confesses to his illegal marriage with Anna and admits to killing her.

[1045] He claims he did it because he loved her and says, quote, sacrifices should be consummated in blood.

[1046] No. Calm down.

[1047] No. Just relax.

[1048] He also tells, said St. Elizabeth of Hungary, his patron saint, had come to him one night and told him that a sacrifice must be done and then it must be done in blood just the same as Abraham was ordered to slay Isaac.

[1049] It's like, you're just putting words together and fucking blaming it on God at this point.

[1050] Yeah.

[1051] Dick.

[1052] Yeah.

[1053] And also you can go through the Bible and find any kind of crazy story that can justify your bad behavior.

[1054] It's interesting now that we see it a lot, don't we?

[1055] You see it a lot.

[1056] Also, from Hungary.

[1057] What area in Hungary?

[1058] A small creepy village.

[1059] I didn't even put that like, it goes all the way.

[1060] That's crazy.

[1061] It goes all the way to the top of Hungary.

[1062] So, Han Schmidt reveals that he had also been a medical student before he was ordained and he would often pose as a medical physician to perform illegal abortions.

[1063] And a search of his apartment later turns up numerous business cards with pseudonyms.

[1064] and dozens of bottles of illegal medication.

[1065] And they also find out that the dentist he was having an affair with, Ernest Moret, he was trying to remove evidence of other illegal shit after Hans got arrested.

[1066] Oh.

[1067] So, but then he quickly buckles and tells police that Schmidt had plotted to commit a string of murders and collect on the victim's life insurance policies.

[1068] So, like, he'd go to these churches where he'd be a sign and the old people that he would, like, you know quote fucking put him out of their misery and then you know put himself on their life insurance well then but then i'm wrong though that he's not crazy then he's just right he's a cold blooded killer he's not right it's not insanity it's a plan well that's what the fucking trials about so the story becomes huge front page news all over new york in the world the next immediately and the scandal becomes this huge sensation it's like a media circus the press camps outside the courthouse during the trial, which starts on December 7th, 1913.

[1069] So his guilt isn't in question because he admitted to everything.

[1070] So his lawyers go for the insanity defense and claim that he was overwhelmed with bloodlust and he was too insane to know right from wrong.

[1071] But you're right.

[1072] He made a plan.

[1073] That's...

[1074] Yeah.

[1075] That says a lot.

[1076] They get his older sister to travel from Germany to testify that he heard voices from a young age and has a psychologist say that...

[1077] Psychologists say that his family tree showed up to 60 near or distant relatives who displayed signs of mental instability, which is like, join the fucking club, friend.

[1078] It's not an excuse.

[1079] There's lots of family trees.

[1080] We're out here.

[1081] That's right.

[1082] Forest of all kinds of mental stuff.

[1083] And you still don't get to kill anybody.

[1084] No, you don't.

[1085] After 23 days of trial, the jury is deadlocked, 10 to 10.

[1086] Two, two people think he is insane.

[1087] The other 10 are like convict this fucker.

[1088] So the judge has to declare a mistrial.

[1089] And then meanwhile, the relentless media coverage leads to more details about his history.

[1090] And when they find out when in Louisville, where he was first to sign in the U .S., in 1909, the body of an eight -year -old girl named Alma Kellner had been found in the basement of St. John's Parish, where he worked.

[1091] Uh -huh.

[1092] The girl had gone missing when Schmidt was in Louisville.

[1093] and her body was found dismembered, similar to Anna's.

[1094] And the body had been burned so they aren't able to conclusively pin it on Schmidt, but they find a local janitor who's a French native named Joseph Wenling, and he's convicted and sentenced to life in prison for the murder based on circumstantial evidence.

[1095] Oh.

[1096] But, I mean, we never know, we never find out, like, for sure if he did it, but it's such a quote, coincidence.

[1097] Yes.

[1098] Yeah, you know.

[1099] So even further back in Schmidt's history, German police traced evidence of a murdered girl in Schmidt's hometown of Ashaffenburg that's possibly connected to him as well.

[1100] So who the fuck knows how many other victims this person had?

[1101] Little baby priest creep.

[1102] Yeah.

[1103] Little baby priest creep.

[1104] That sounds like a nursery rhyme.

[1105] It's also like little deuce coop a little bit.

[1106] We have a little baby priest.

[1107] Baby creep.

[1108] It's too many words.

[1109] At the opening of the retrial, his attorney is like, I'm going to prove to you guys that this priest is insane.

[1110] And Han Schmidt jumps out of his chair and says, that's not true.

[1111] I'm not insane or whatever.

[1112] It's like, do yourself a fucking favor.

[1113] But no, he's a megalomaniac and can't even handle that.

[1114] He's sane.

[1115] He's not smart.

[1116] Exactly.

[1117] So at the second trial, the judge advises the jury to really use their common sense.

[1118] I think he's like, the second time around, can you, you two people who.

[1119] who couldn't get it together last time, please, use common sense and says, bear in mind, it isn't every form of mental unsoundness that excuses a crime, which I love that.

[1120] It's so true.

[1121] So on February 5th, 1914, after three hours of deliberation, the jury finds Hans Schmidt guilty of first degree murder and he sentenced to death by electric chair.

[1122] His appeals are ultimately denied.

[1123] And on February 18th, 1916, Han Schmidt is put to death in the electric chair in New York's Sing Sing Prison.

[1124] The last thing he says is, I ask forgiveness of all those I have injured or scandalized.

[1125] And he becomes and remains the only Catholic priest to be executed for murder in the United States.

[1126] And 21 -year -old Anna Amuler's head was never recovered.

[1127] And her remains were never claimed by anyone, sadly.

[1128] So she's buried in Potter's Field on Heart Island.

[1129] I know.

[1130] It's so sad.

[1131] And so that is the story of the killer priest, Han Schmidt, the first and only priest to be executed in the United States.

[1132] Whoa.

[1133] I now want to read like a book about that guy.

[1134] Yeah.

[1135] I think that the one I said is the only one I could.

[1136] That's the only one I could find.

[1137] The trunk dripped blood.

[1138] I want to read the other four.

[1139] Yeah.

[1140] Like what it's five cases.

[1141] And I never heard of that one.

[1142] I'm wondering what the other ones are.

[1143] Yeah.

[1144] That's that's crazy.

[1145] Yeah.

[1146] I can't believe they like even back then because they were so religious everyone that they executed a priest is pretty big.

[1147] I mean, how can you not though?

[1148] It's like he admitted it.

[1149] He has this insane background.

[1150] Yeah.

[1151] They're probably like you're not a priest.

[1152] Yeah, really.

[1153] You would do stuff like that.

[1154] Yeah.

[1155] Oh man. That was great.

[1156] Thank you.

[1157] I've never heard of that.

[1158] Yeah.

[1159] I mean either.

[1160] Yeah.

[1161] Thanks to history photographed on Instagram for letting me know about that one.

[1162] Nice one.

[1163] Nice job history photograph.

[1164] You better not be fucking making shit up Like You better not be two 14 year old boys Bored in a quarantine They're just like posting pictures of the Titanic This old boat was haunted What?

[1165] Okay Let's do fucking hooray's Let's do it You want to go first?

[1166] Sure, can I do two really short ones as one?

[1167] Do whatever you want This is your show This one's called this one's from Ashley Loveley With ease at the end My fucking hooray I shaved my head last week And I feel so free And then the other one is from Little underscore Lion Underscore King Can my fucking hooray be that I finally officially quit my job at Cracker Barrel?

[1168] Oh, I mean, yeah I just thought those were two little Perfect ones.

[1169] Those are good.

[1170] Well, mine's going to start As a big one.

[1171] This is from Chloe.

[1172] My fucking hooray is that I managed to end a very long abusive relationship.

[1173] What's crazy is that it's been a month and his two most recent exes reached out to me and validated everything that I had experienced and helped assure me that I am not in fact crazy.

[1174] We've made a group chat and have been supporting each other and are planning on meeting up for drinks after all this dies down.

[1175] Real queens fix each other's crowns.

[1176] Oh, and also do not stand abusive pricks.

[1177] Love the show and I can't begin to explain how much you have impacted my life.

[1178] Stay sexy and don't let shitty.

[1179] X's win.

[1180] Oh my God.

[1181] Isn't that the best?

[1182] That's so good.

[1183] Thank you.

[1184] Thank you.

[1185] That was great.

[1186] Chloe, good job.

[1187] I'm speechless.

[1188] I have chills.

[1189] Tell those two other women we say hi as well.

[1190] Yeah.

[1191] And great job.

[1192] Yeah.

[1193] Okay.

[1194] This one's from Cato Pancake on Instagram.

[1195] Hello, MFM family.

[1196] In 2019, I finally quit the job that nearly destroyed me both physically and mentally.

[1197] Well, at the same time, I was continuing to deal with a past sexual assault.

[1198] But at the end of March 2020, I was able to buy my first house and complete a lifelong dream of being a homeowner.

[1199] I just turned 26 and I realize I'm very young, but I can bet that buying a house with the fuck you money you got from a shitty job feels good at any age.

[1200] Yeah.

[1201] Uh -huh.

[1202] Love to you all.

[1203] And remember, you're worth more than a paycheck.

[1204] Love Cato.

[1205] Oh, nice.

[1206] Good job, Cato.

[1207] Good job.

[1208] This is from Valeria One Gam.

[1209] It says, first of all, I want to say, love you guys, blah, blah, blah.

[1210] And I just finished listening to all the episodes, so I'm officially caught up anyways.

[1211] It's really long.

[1212] My fucking hooray is that my boyfriend and I have decided to start a little garden so that we don't have to leave the house as often to use veggies that we would usually have to go to the store to buy.

[1213] And it makes me happy.

[1214] Hope you're all staying safe and healthy.

[1215] love V and her dog.

[1216] Wait, is she saying her dog is her boyfriend?

[1217] Hey, no judgments.

[1218] Do what you want.

[1219] Do your thing.

[1220] Cute.

[1221] This is from Katie Parrish.

[1222] On April 24th, our third baby boy was unexpectedly born six weeks early.

[1223] Giving birth and having him spend time in the NICU during this pandemic was surreal, stressful, and exhausting.

[1224] There were many new strict rules and because of social distancing, our friends and family couldn't help us in person, but they supported us in other ways, and our doctors and nurses were sweet baby angels.

[1225] Whenever a COVID patient got better and was discharged, they would play the rocky theme song throughout the hospital.

[1226] Oh, no, no, no, no. Oh, care.

[1227] Go ahead.

[1228] That's such a good idea.

[1229] It was an amazing mood booster and gave us hope.

[1230] After three weeks, we finally got to bring our munchkin home.

[1231] I got to hold my baby and huff his head while unmasked.

[1232] My five and three -year -old's got to meet their new brother and our family is together safe at home.

[1233] Oh, thank God.

[1234] Yeah.

[1235] What a, what a fucking, what a thing to go through during normal times.

[1236] Yeah.

[1237] And then add a pandemic for everyone, it's stressful.

[1238] Unbelievable.

[1239] Okay, this one is from Walls, W -A -L -L -S.

[1240] And the subject line is Quirantine Projects slash hoorayes.

[1241] Okay.

[1242] Like a tough it just starts like a couple of stereotypical lesbians my girlfriend and I started on some home improvement projects during quarantine parentheses but not before dyeing my hair blue and giving me an undercut right now we're hard at work redoing the back deck and it's tedious on your hands and knees work but it's so satisfying to watch the slow but steady transformation in a time where everything is uncertain and my anxiety is back to a difficult to manage level it's comforting to work on something tangible that also allows me to have a modicum of control, healthy coping for the win.

[1243] Also, my girlfriend has loved watching the videos of people deep cleaning really filthy car interiors, all types of flooring, exteriors of homes, shit like that.

[1244] And she's always wanted a pressure washer, which frankly is the cutest, purest thing in the whole ass world.

[1245] So this week, I bought one for her.

[1246] And wow, the absolute unbridled joy in her face.

[1247] And in her voice, when I loaded it into the car and when we put it together and when she used it for the first time, made me so happy.

[1248] Fucking hooray for the happiness of loved ones.

[1249] P .S. I work for the state.

[1250] I won't say which one, but Coase has hit us hard.

[1251] And going to Zoom meetings with blue hair has been fucking hooray because the reactions are one of two extremes and excited, hell yes, girl, or a stuffy, mildly confused.

[1252] Oh.

[1253] And that's the whole thing.

[1254] That's a real slice of life.

[1255] Thank you, Wals.

[1256] That's hilarious.

[1257] Oh, my God.

[1258] I want a pressure washer.

[1259] Is that weird?

[1260] Not at all.

[1261] I have one that's like, it's not an official one, but it's like the kind you get at the hardware store.

[1262] It basically like makes this stream from your hose even smaller.

[1263] And it is really satisfying.

[1264] But that actually made somebody just recently retweeted that made me think of the, there's a video of someone vacuuming that huge blue whale that's at the Museum of Natural History in New York City.

[1265] What?

[1266] Because it gets crazy.

[1267] crazy dusty and I guess they vacuum it once a year and it the video so look it up if you like stuff like that because the video is crazy satisfying to just watch the whale go from like kind of light brown to then you see the blue underneath it's really funny I have a I have a feeling someday I'm well I don't know if so let me do this because he's so private but I want to do like a garage makeover of our our fucking murder garage oh yeah turned it into like a cool well your The garage just looks like everyone's garage.

[1268] That's what they, that's every garage kind of in America, unless you do a makeover.

[1269] Right.

[1270] What if you just keep on tiling all the way out into the garage?

[1271] All the way up.

[1272] It's just filled with tile.

[1273] What is this?

[1274] People are just like, thanks guys for listening.

[1275] We appreciate your support.

[1276] We know this is a really fucking hard time for everyone.

[1277] And there's confusion and scariness and stress and anxiety and.

[1278] And we are there with you.

[1279] We are.

[1280] And I just want to say before we finish, it was a very sad thing in the Los Angeles comedy community.

[1281] A comic name Richard Bain died recently a couple days ago.

[1282] And it's a huge loss, very surprising, very upsetting for a lot of people.

[1283] And he was one of those kind of comics.

[1284] I didn't know him.

[1285] I wasn't personal friends with him.

[1286] I mean, I knew him to say hi to, but I wasn't friends friends with him.

[1287] But I am friends with a lot of.

[1288] of people that were very close to him and I'm thinking about them a lot because it's bothered me so much hearing about it that I can't imagine what they're going through.

[1289] But it's weird because when like he was one of those comics that was like such a in down to his bones comedian.

[1290] He was such a hilarious person and a really funny, fun person.

[1291] Like he was always doing bits but not in the super irritating way like in the way of like having fun in the real world.

[1292] Yeah.

[1293] Yeah.

[1294] Yeah.

[1295] And I think when you lose a person like that, it hits in this way where it may, along with everything else that's going on, it's very like jarring to reality because he seemed to be having such a great time.

[1296] And I think he did.

[1297] I think he did.

[1298] But also people are very complex, obviously.

[1299] And there's lots, lots going on under the surface for all of us.

[1300] But I just want to say that that he'll be remembered.

[1301] And he was very, very deeply respected.

[1302] and admired and he he's just known as one of the funniest people it you know in this scene and um so it's very sad so i just wanted to take a second to to remember him well but that's it for us we will talk to you very soon and in the meantime stay strong and stay safe and of course most importantly stay sexy and don't get murdered again bye Elvis you're right here you want a cookie Ooh, it's a life one.

[1303] Oh, my gosh.

[1304] Good boy.

[1305] Cookie.

[1306] Wow.

[1307] Okay, so Apple TV Plus's new crime drama is defending Jacob, and it follows an assistant DA whose life is turned upside down when his son is accused of murder.

[1308] So it stars Chris Evans, Michelle Dockery, and Jaden Martel.

[1309] In this limited series, they play a family whose fate hangs in the balance of the legal system.

[1310] Apple asked us to partner with them to create some special content to give our listeners a chance to put themselves in the Barber family's shoes.

[1311] And so what you're about to hear right now is George and I, we got the chance to talk to Michelle Dockery and Jaden Martel so they could tell us about what it was like to work on this show and all that behind the scene stuff.

[1312] It was super.

[1313] We were super excited to talk to them.

[1314] So here's a little bit of that conversation.

[1315] You know, because this family goes through some really horrible things and has to make some really tough decisions.

[1316] Did you guys ever think, you know, as you were going through that, like, in real life, what would I actually do?

[1317] opposed to what my character is doing right now?

[1318] Yeah, with any character that you play, you always sort of question, you know, what would I do?

[1319] You know, how would I react?

[1320] I would probably be a little bit more like Andy.

[1321] I would be going out of my way to, you know, find the, you know, the person that did it.

[1322] And it's definitely the thing that drew me to the character because I initially read the first few.

[1323] I can't remember how many we read Jaden, but it was like three or four initially.

[1324] And, you know, as I was reading it, I was thinking, okay, where is this going?

[1325] Where does she stand on this?

[1326] And then there's that scene with Vogel where she, you know, she begins to question the past and there's the flashback of the, you know, tiny Jacob in the bowling alley, which was kind of strange to shoot actually.

[1327] That was intense.

[1328] Watching a very tiny child holding a bowling ball over the other kid's head, which is very strange.

[1329] is true, what did I do wrong?

[1330] Right.

[1331] Because you're responsible for, well, how responsible is like nature versus nurture in terms of that situation.

[1332] Yeah.

[1333] So it would be such a huge question for a mother.

[1334] Yeah.

[1335] Jaden, one of the one of the things we were talking about Jaden is, is your, how amazing you were, they were talking about how impressive it was to watch you walk that line where you're playing a character and you kind of, you just have to seem innocent and guilty.

[1336] at the same time kind of.

[1337] Did you have any were there any tricks you were using to do that or anything that you were thinking of particularly to play that because you did it so well.

[1338] Thank you.

[1339] Yeah.

[1340] So it was just either he's, you know, he's super innocent or he seems super normal.

[1341] He has, he loves his family.

[1342] He plays video games.

[1343] He has friends.

[1344] So it was either he is a kid in this terrible situation or he's an incredible liar.

[1345] So it's just, it's like, it seems the same on the outside, but it was just figuring out who he was internally.

[1346] You definitely play an angsty teen really well.

[1347] Yeah.

[1348] Did you guys before this have any interest in true crime?

[1349] Michelle, it seems like you might have.

[1350] I might have.

[1351] Yeah.

[1352] Like to show called my favorite murder.

[1353] It was something really drew me to the job, actually, was the genre.

[1354] I love a crime drama.

[1355] And what I loved about this one is that it really focuses so much on the family and how they deal with it, you know, more so in some way than the who done it part of the story.

[1356] Jaden, any interest in true crime?

[1357] Not really, but I was thinking about it.

[1358] I feel like I went through a long phase where I was really trying to figure out like who killed Tupac and Biggie.

[1359] I was like that was my true crime phase where I would do research on on YouTube and yes what are you doing yeah any theories I don't know I don't want to throw anybody yeah that's great that's smart that's smart it's very smart I have my theories we'll email us some theories we'd love to hear that once we stop recording you can get a side scoop well we always ask everybody if they have a hometown murder which is Like we, for George and I, we got interested in true crime kind of at young ages because we were exposed to, I lived in the San Francisco Bay area.

[1360] So there was like the trailside killer and there was lots of serial killers up there actually.

[1361] So are there any, can you remember any like hearing about crimes like that at a young age or anything that made an impression on you?

[1362] I don't.

[1363] But today I thought, I'm going to Google it actually and find out if there's anything from my hometown.

[1364] town.

[1365] And I have one, which I think you will interest you.

[1366] But this was all I could find.

[1367] So I'm going to read it to you.

[1368] Hissing Sid, the swan, evicted from River Chelmner in Essex, which is where I'm from, after trying to drown a girl, arguably one of the most notorious and violent swans to grace Essex waters.

[1369] Hissing Sid was finally evicted from the River Chelmner in 2010.

[1370] He attacked hundreds of walkers and canoeists during his time in the river by capsizing their boats and pecking them.

[1371] Kissing Sid famously tried to drown a 13 -year -old girl after he forced her boat to capsize before flapping his wings to keep her under the water.

[1372] Following a spate of offenses, I love that.

[1373] Following spate of offenses, the rogue swan was finally captured and removed from the river in August 2010.

[1374] I think you just won hometown.

[1375] Wow.

[1376] Follow at Apple TV on Instagram and Twitter to join the discussion.

[1377] Each week, they'll post a crucial question about that week's episode.

[1378] Find out what you and other viewers would actually do.

[1379] And watch Defending Jacob on Apple TV plus every Friday.

[1380] Goodbye.