A Bit of Relief: 'Soup Is Soup'

[0] Okay, did this work?

[1] I am here.

[2] I can hear you.

[3] Hi, I'm Ali Jaffe.

[4] I'm 28, and I'm a contributing writer for The New York Times.

[5] I'm Roswin Jaffe.

[6] I'm 91.

[7] I'm Alexander's grandmother.

[8] What else would you like to know?

[9] I live in Brooklyn, and I'm in Florida, fairly well isolated.

[10] You know, when I was starting to feel worried about, the coronavirus.

[11] I turned to her hoping that she would just be like, oh, I've seen it all.

[12] Like, this is what it felt like in 1944, whatever.

[13] And that was not her message.

[14] No, no. For World War II, I was young, so maybe it didn't affect me deeply.

[15] But even so, it does not compare to what's happening now.

[16] She was like, yeah, this is crazy.

[17] This is unprecedented.

[18] I've never seen or felt anything like this.

[19] If you're smart or you're not smart, you have money, you don't have money.

[20] Everybody is just affected by this.

[21] It's just so different than anything I believe we've experienced as a country, a world.

[22] So we were talking more frequently, which was good, but all of our phone calls were like increasingly stressful.

[23] You know how it is when you're talking to anyone these days.

[24] Like you're just talking about coronavirus.

[25] We were just worrying about family.

[26] Well, what if she gets at where everybody was, maybe stuck someplace that they didn't want to be?

[27] Trying to avoid the elephant in the room, which is just that she and my grandpa are 91 and 93, which is amazing.

[28] But it also means they're high risk.

[29] The older you are, I guess the more so you're susceptible.

[30] A lot of our conversation was like, so I guess we shouldn't really go out anymore, right?

[31] Or you're watching your, you're as often as you can, right?

[32] I just realized we needed something else to focus on during our calls.

[33] I'm there.

[34] All right.

[35] So I got all of the ingredients that you told me to get.

[36] Yes.

[37] Wait, Grandma.

[38] So I never cook.

[39] Should I turn the stove on?

[40] I, like, am a horrible cook.

[41] Sure.

[42] You can turn it on now.

[43] And because I was working from home, I finally had time to, like, learn how to cook a little bit.

[44] And I just thought, like, oh, why don't I try some of my grandma's recipes?

[45] And that's how it kind of started.

[46] Wait, Grandma.

[47] They just asked her to teach me one and then another.

[48] Reverse the FaceTime.

[49] Like, see how the video is now of your foot?

[50] I'd put her on FaceTime as I was, you know, going through the steps.

[51] Oh, I'm sitting on the couch.

[52] Right, but see how, like, your screen is looking at your feet, not your face?

[53] Yeah.

[54] Okay, what am I doing wrong?

[55] Okay, so see, there's like a couple buttons.

[56] Well, I think what was wonderful was the cooking together.

[57] That's been a marvelous distraction.

[58] Yeah, nice.

[59] You did it.

[60] Okay, get it.

[61] And I think being involved in anything nowadays is very important.

[62] I mean, I can read and I can do my puzzles, but it's not the same.

[63] Okay, so today we're making matzabal soup.

[64] Yes.

[65] Honestly, matzabal soup is the recipe that I have always been trying to get from my grandma.

[66] That's the one thing that they know they will always have on a holiday of my house.

[67] She makes it differently than I've ever had it at a deli.

[68] My mom trying to cook it.

[69] There's something about the way she makes it that is so uniquely hers.

[70] This is kind of the perfect excuse to finally steal her recipe.

[71] Well, the first thing you do is open the cans of soup.

[72] Okay.

[73] Which, it turns out, wasn't much of a recipe.

[74] And put them in a big pot.

[75] And is there a reason that you told me to get the college -in one?

[76] She was like, you get two cans of college -in chicken broth.

[77] Yes, because that's what I use.

[78] That's the one that's worth the best.

[79] You get the matzabal mix?

[80] Okay, I'm pouring them in.

[81] Then you put them together.

[82] I was like, Grandma.

[83] That's right.

[84] That's your recipe?

[85] And I guess like that's just 100%.

[86] Right, right.

[87] None of the healthy ones.

[88] Got the real thing.

[89] I always thought it was like a very complicated recipe, though, because my mom would try to make it and she could never make it, like, the way you do.

[90] Surprise, surprise.

[91] How did you learn how to make matzabal soup?

[92] You know, when we were talking, I was like, Grandma, where did you learn how to cook, hoping that she would say, like, my grandmother.

[93] My mother never taught me. What great symbolism if she learned from her.

[94] her grandmother and now I'm learning from her and she was like oh I never learned how to cook I still don't know how to cook I was like what do you mean you don't know how to cook you're teaching me and she was like no if if your grandma didn't teach you how to make matzbole soup you just taught yourself yeah like how like off of the can I bought the cans of soup and then I just enriched it with all the vegetables I mean soup is soup I mean I I I was I was known for my tuna casseroles in the early days.

[95] The tuna casserole was what I would leave for the children when I was working in the evening.

[96] Well, my cooking skills were never great because I was, I guess, considered a career woman in my day, you know, like I was working Thursday nights till 9.

[97] So the casserole was noodles.

[98] Literally, noodles, mushroom soup, a can of cream of mushroom soup, a can of tuna fish, corn flakes on top and corn flakes as a crust.

[99] That was the whole dinner with something like either string beans or peas, so it made a pretty looking colorful place.

[100] Her split pea soup, she was trying to remember the different ingredients and she was like, oh, you know what, if you just go to the grocery store and find the bag of split peas.

[101] That's where the recipe is.

[102] Okay.

[103] Whatever the box says, okay.

[104] Whatever the box says, that's what I do.

[105] I was like, oh, this isn't some, like, family recipe.

[106] This is the recipe on the back of a goya bag.

[107] And that's kind of been all of them.

[108] Allie?

[109] Yes.

[110] I made one recipe at a time.

[111] She was describing a chicken dish that is kind of like a family.

[112] they call it chicken jaffy because it's like kind of our family chicken dish.

[113] And it's a famous recipe in our family, but I never knew what was in it.

[114] And she was telling me, she was like, So you're putting in ketchup.

[115] Okay, you need ketchup.

[116] You need mayo.

[117] At the one container.

[118] You need dry onion soup and chili sauce.

[119] That's exactly it.

[120] I was like, Grandma, that's what you put on this chicken?

[121] You got it all.

[122] I do have a few good family recipes that I, uh, I care.

[123] You know how, like, mom always makes chicken soup from scratch?

[124] But every year, we're always like, we like Grandma's soup the best.

[125] Like, we like her matzabal soup the best.

[126] I wonder if she knows that it's all from a can.

[127] When she was cooking in the 60s for her kids, she had limited resources.

[128] She had limited time.

[129] There was not a lot of money at all.

[130] and she made do.

[131] She made it work, and the point of cooking was to connect with her family and to feed them.

[132] You know, it's funny, this is exactly what I always say to mom about mac and cheese from a box.

[133] I just like it from the box better.

[134] I like Annie's mac and cheese.

[135] Like, you know, she had to do it, and so she fed them every night.

[136] And I think about a lot of my friends and how right now we're all kind of like thrust into this situation of necessity.

[137] You know, we don't have restaurants anymore.

[138] You know, we have limited takeout options, and you're not supposed to go to the grocery store that often.

[139] So I feel like, again, we're, like, making due with limited resources, and we're returning to this place where the point of cooking is to feed ourselves for survival, for, to feed yourself.

[140] And that really changes kind of the way you're even thinking about cooking.

[141] instead of making a really fancy meal, you're just kind of, like, what's in the cupboard?

[142] What can I make?

[143] How many cans of soup are you using?

[144] Four.

[145] Oh, then put them in.

[146] As long as you've got them in.

[147] And the nice thing is all of her recipes are really easy ingredients to find during quarantine.

[148] So, you know, it's like all, like, cans and beans and condiments.

[149] I think as a result of this, some people, will be cooks and some people will never look at cooking again.

[150] I think, I think you're absolutely right.

[151] Cut the onion and quarters and stick it in the soup.

[152] Uh -oh.

[153] Should I have peeled it first?

[154] Oh, yes.

[155] Okay.

[156] Well, I think, I think if you're not a real cook and everything, it can be very therapeutic, especially now.

[157] If you can focus on anything, be it cooking or anything, It's very helpful.

[158] This is my kind of cooking.

[159] My kind of cooking is like, you know, kind of like assembly more than cooking.

[160] Well, during the Depression, my mother...

[161] I thought we were just going to be cooking, which is what we did, but it was like so many stories.

[162] I have to tell you, one, did I tell you this incident?

[163] Because I really, it stayed with me all my life.

[164] Just little things from her past that I had never known.

[165] My mother gave me money to buy a pint of sour cream.

[166] I didn't know how aware my grandmother was of the Great Depression when she was growing up because she was really young.

[167] She was like five, something like that.

[168] On my way home, fooling around, the sour cream fell on the ground.

[169] Gone.

[170] Shattered.

[171] Shattered and there was no sour cream for dinner.

[172] that was it, didn't have the money to go back and get it.

[173] Now, it wasn't a tragedy, but I felt very guilty.

[174] I think talking to her about her past, making it through all of these different periods and challenges makes me feel a little calmer, even though this is unprecedented, and we feel that.

[175] We feel how strange and knew all of this is.

[176] It will become a story that we tell.

[177] Grandma, we're done for now.

[178] Okay, now you can take a rest.

[179] What's nice is that Ellie and I can just talk about things, which is lovely.

[180] You know, generation -wise, I think it's just marvelous that we've been able to connect and just talk to one another.

[181] And there's nothing about, oh, I'm too old or she's too, whatever.

[182] I don't know.

[183] It's been a granddaughter and a grandmother, but a friendship of a different type, which has been very rich for me. Okay, I'll call you when the 20 minutes is up and we can put the mozzarella and then you'll make the balls.

[184] We're returning to this place where the point of cooking is to feed ourselves.

[185] And in my case right now, it's to connect with my grandma.

[186] So it's returning to that idea.

[187] of connection and purpose.

[188] So that's been something that I think I have realized and returned to as I hear her stories.

[189] Love you, Grandma.

[190] I love this whole thing.

[191] And everybody, stay well and be careful.

[192] I think you just have to hunker down and hope for the best.

[193] I don't know that anyone can do.

[194] anything, hope that the people that are dealing with the science and the medicine and so forth are going to get it done.