Conan Must Go: Sebastian (Argentina)

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[4] Hi, Sebastian.

[5] Welcome to Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.

[6] Hey, hi.

[7] Nice to meet you, man. How are you, Sebastian?

[8] How are you?

[9] I'm great.

[10] How are you?

[11] Fine, fine, very happy to talk to you, man. Well, I'm happy to talk to you, man. I got to tell you right now.

[12] Where are you?

[13] Are you in Buenos Aires?

[14] Is that right?

[15] Buenos Aires, Argentina, yes.

[16] I love the accent.

[17] Buenos Aires, Argentina.

[18] Argentina.

[19] Yeah, fantastic.

[20] Tell me a little bit about yourself, Sebastian.

[21] Okay, I'm an artist, a painter, illustrator.

[22] And, well, I live here since I was a little boy.

[23] I was born in Los Angeles, California, but my parents and all my family is from Argentina.

[24] So I came back to Argentina when I was a little boy.

[25] So now, I live in Argentina, I'm an Argentinian.

[26] Oh, wow.

[27] Okay, and you said you're a painter.

[28] Are those your paintings behind you?

[29] Yeah, here I'm in my studio.

[30] These are some of my paintings.

[31] Oh my God, you're really good.

[32] Those are terrific.

[33] Okay, thanks.

[34] He also did one of someone else we know here.

[35] I'll just put this up to the camera.

[36] Oh my God, look at that.

[37] Did you do that, Sebastian?

[38] Oh, God.

[39] Well, yes.

[40] I was studying some Irish history and it came along that character.

[41] I, oh my God.

[42] I have to say, you've got the proportions right.

[43] You've got the long legs.

[44] And you were, thank you, you were a little generous with the torso, with the chest.

[45] And everything looks pretty much spot on.

[46] He has dress shoes on.

[47] And business socks.

[48] And dress socks.

[49] Yes, that's how.

[50] I don't know why.

[51] That's how my clan always dressed back in Ireland.

[52] Wow, hundreds of years ago.

[53] Sebastian, you're very talented.

[54] Okay, thank you.

[55] Thank you.

[56] Have you done artwork that's, you know, been used internationally?

[57] Yeah, yeah.

[58] I work internationally since like 20 years.

[59] I work with so many medias and I do painting for famous celebrities and rock stars.

[60] Can you tell us?

[61] Can you tell us which rock stars you've done paintings for?

[62] Well, I've done for the Redcaut Chili Peppers, foo fighters.

[63] Last week, I've done one for the Black Crow.

[64] Oh, my God, I love all those groups.

[65] I really love the Black Crows.

[66] I love those guys.

[67] Yeah, they're amazing.

[68] Yeah, wow.

[69] That's very impressive.

[70] Tell me, Sebastian, I'm curious, because if I were to, ask you to paint me what would your approach I've already did no I know no I know you did I know you did and it's very good but I guess what I'm asking you is what have you noticed about me that stands out in a portrait you know well your hair it's it's notorious and you know it hasn't committed any crimes that you know of Yeah.

[71] I love that my hair is notorious.

[72] So you think the hair is the first thing you have to nail in your artistic approach.

[73] Yeah, I think that that's one.

[74] But if you do a hair and the face is not, when you do a portrait, the face is not looking like the character.

[75] You could do the hair good, but the face is not good.

[76] It's going to be like really, really weird.

[77] Yes.

[78] So you have like a chin, like a tomato soup chin, you know?

[79] Wait, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

[80] I have a tomato soup can chin.

[81] You say that like we should know what you mean.

[82] What do you mean?

[83] I have a tomato soup can chin.

[84] And I'm not saying you're wrong.

[85] I just go ahead.

[86] I just want to know what you mean.

[87] The Campbell soup.

[88] I don't care what type of soup it is.

[89] I want to know why my chin is like a can of tomato soup.

[90] Because you're like, I don't know the name in English, but you have the like your face is like very proportionate.

[91] Like it's done like with with metal, you know?

[92] Like I look like my face was hashed out of metal.

[93] I looked like someone just took a hubcap from a car and just bashed it with a hammer like that.

[94] Yeah, there you go.

[95] That's what I look like.

[96] I was smashed out of metal.

[97] Are you saying that I have...

[98] Now, first of all, my face is very proportionate, right?

[99] Yes.

[100] Yes, it is.

[101] Have you noticed that I have sharp cheekbones?

[102] Yes.

[103] Yes.

[104] You are very handsome.

[105] Thank you.

[106] There you go.

[107] And Sebastian, I thank you for that because I'm looking at you and I'm thinking you look like, you know...

[108] What is his name?

[109] Krista Waldow from...

[110] Oh, Niccolo Costa Waldo.

[111] You look like Nikolai Koster Waldo.

[112] from Game of Thrones, you look like...

[113] Jamie Lannister.

[114] Yeah.

[115] Yeah, but if he were a bottle of ketchup.

[116] The little guy?

[117] The little guy?

[118] No. No, no, no. The King Slayer, the one that gets his hand chopped off.

[119] Sorry, spoiler alert.

[120] No, no, I know that guy and hope I don't have the same luck because he lost the hem.

[121] Yeah, no, no. I didn't mean you're so good looking you're going to get your hand chopped off.

[122] I just said you look like Nikolai Koster Waldow.

[123] And you should be very happy.

[124] You're a very good -looking fellow.

[125] And I'd like to just repeat that you thought that I'm a very good -looking fellow.

[126] Is that true?

[127] Yes, you are.

[128] You are, man. Yeah.

[129] I've always tried to imitate your hair, but I cannot do it.

[130] It's not for everyone.

[131] For anyone.

[132] You have not hair.

[133] So you meant to say my hair is not for everyone, but you said it's not for anyone.

[134] Yeah.

[135] It's notorious.

[136] It's a war criminal.

[137] So do you think maybe I should change my hair now, or is it too late?

[138] No, never.

[139] Okay.

[140] I'm not going to change my hair.

[141] What would you change it to?

[142] You just like slick it back?

[143] I don't know.

[144] I can do whatever I want.

[145] All right.

[146] I'm sorry.

[147] I've got hundreds of dollars.

[148] Sebastian, this intrigues me. I'm interested.

[149] I've never tried painting, but do you think that maybe I could become a painter?

[150] Yes, you can.

[151] Yes, you can.

[152] You have all the skills.

[153] how do you know you you you should look like a like a german painter you know something like that from the renaissance okay so you're saying that i have all the skills and then i asked you what do i have and you say well you sort of look like a german painter but yeah but you don't know that i have any painting skill no you know i don't i don't the look is 100 % i have to look like a painting sebastian Sebastian is Is this how you pick a surgeon when you need surgery?

[154] I want that guy.

[155] He just looks like a surgeon.

[156] Yeah, I look the guy that comfort me. I don't know if he's a cleaner or a computer technique or just do me an operation.

[157] Oh, my heart.

[158] You look good, man. I love that.

[159] I love your attitude, Sebastian.

[160] And I'm really sorry about your upcoming heart surgery.

[161] I don't think it's going to go well When you're plumber I pick a monkey, you know So So Sebastian I don't want to get too personal But you're a very good looking guy And you're very talented painter If you were single I'd think man this guy would be just killing it out there with the ladies, right?

[162] Well, no, I married 20 years ago I had three teenagers So kids No, it's not happening Okay.

[163] All right.

[164] Well, I think that's, no, listen, don't say sorry.

[165] That's okay.

[166] I wasn't asking for myself.

[167] I know what it's like.

[168] I have twins.

[169] I have twins like Sona.

[170] Oh, really?

[171] Hey.

[172] They're teenagers?

[173] Yeah, they're teenagers.

[174] Yeah.

[175] The worst is coming, you know?

[176] No, no, no, no, it's good.

[177] It's good.

[178] It's all going to be good.

[179] No, no, no. When they're in prison, at least you know where they are.

[180] Yeah, and probably they go together.

[181] Yeah, they'll both be in the same cell.

[182] So you have one visiting day and you see them both.

[183] Oh, good.

[184] They have to share the telephone through the glass partition, but that's it.

[185] Sebastian, you and I are very similar.

[186] We're both artists.

[187] Yes.

[188] You work in oil.

[189] No, no, hold on.

[190] Let me get through this.

[191] Okay.

[192] We're both artists, Sebastian.

[193] You work in oils and paints, and I work in laughter and joy.

[194] We are both very good looking We've both been married for 20 years And we have kids Yet women still fall at our feet We just don't succumb to the temptation Isn't that right, Sebastian?

[195] Yeah, that's right.

[196] That's right.

[197] We are like focused in our work, in our family.

[198] Focused, yes, we're focused on our families And we don't even notice that all these women No. Desire us so.

[199] No, no, no, no. You guys aren't saying.

[200] And here in Argentina, you have very nice women.

[201] Really?

[202] Tell me more about that.

[203] Yeah, yeah, South America.

[204] It's even better than Brazil.

[205] What's that?

[206] It's even better than Brazil.

[207] Even better than Brazil.

[208] Oh, wow.

[209] The women of Argentina are quite beautiful, you say.

[210] Maybe I could come by for a visit.

[211] We will love to receive you and I will take you a tour.

[212] But no women, no women, only our wife, you know.

[213] Well, my wife can't make it.

[214] I mean, I haven't asked her.

[215] Oh, okay.

[216] But she won't be available.

[217] Okay, so I might be on my own, but you could be my wingman.

[218] And my wife and I have an arrangement.

[219] You know what an arrangement is, Sebastian?

[220] Ah, you come?

[221] Yeah.

[222] When I leave the continent, you know, when I leave continental United States and I drift south.

[223] Oh.

[224] Oh god, I have certain Oh, just stop That's not true What's that?

[225] That's not true Oh, no, absolutely not No You know that I spend Hours and hours Listening to the To the postcard while I work Oh, that's nice That's nice to know So does the podcast Help you with your work in any way?

[226] No It just kills time Yeah, kill time.

[227] It distract me, you know.

[228] No, no. Talking serious, you're a very good company.

[229] And I work a lot here in my studio alone and always listening to the podcast.

[230] You know, Sebastian, I have to say that's kind of mind -blowing.

[231] I never get tired of hearing people from different parts of the world saying that we're in their ear being idiots while they're doing their good work.

[232] So that's amazing.

[233] And also, I have a story of, we get busted in school because of your fault when you work in the Simpsons.

[234] Oh, you would, why would you get busted?

[235] Because we were singing the song of the, I don't know how to say it in English, the monoriel.

[236] Oh, you were singing, that's an episode I wrote.

[237] Yeah, the monorail song.

[238] All the classroom, and we didn't stop, and we earn a, I don't know, a bad note because we sung all the monorail thing.

[239] That makes me so happy that a song I wrote back in, I don't know, 1991 or 1992 in a little tiny office.

[240] Yeah, here in Los Angeles was being sung by a whole bunch of kids.

[241] in Argentina.

[242] That's so cool.

[243] That really blows my mind.

[244] That's crazy.

[245] Well, I'm glad I got you all in trouble.

[246] I was doing my job.

[247] Okay.

[248] Well, some of my friends are in jail now because of that.

[249] You know what?

[250] No better reason to go to jail, in my opinion.

[251] Sebastian, let's review.

[252] We're both very handsome.

[253] No, we got this, I think.

[254] Hold it.

[255] We're just reviewing one more time.

[256] We're both very good -looking.

[257] handsome artists and we both are very loyal to our wives, but who can say anything could happen at any moment?

[258] And you think that I should come to Argentina because the women are very beautiful.

[259] Would I stand out?

[260] I play guitar.

[261] I play guitar also.

[262] Oh, cool.

[263] Oh, we could jam.

[264] Hey, do I, do I, how would I, would I stand out in Argentina?

[265] Would people know that I'm, or would I look, do I look Argentinian?

[266] No. No. But we have a lot of mixes, you know.

[267] In Argentina, they come from all over the world because of the World War, too, you know.

[268] Oh.

[269] We have Italians.

[270] We have Germans.

[271] We have a lot of Nazis hanging out.

[272] Yeah.

[273] You would fit in now that I think about it.

[274] A lot of really old men with little moustaches.

[275] Yeah.

[276] Who are saying, you see, let's look at me. Ola.

[277] How is this?

[278] I see she shlauton.

[279] No, no, no. Sebastian, so what would give me away in Argentina?

[280] Would it be my hair or my ridiculous, notorious hair, or my tomato can jaw?

[281] Sorry about that.

[282] No, no, you could look like an Argentina, and you just have to chill more, you know, when you walk and be a little.

[283] more chill and not that tense, you know?

[284] Yeah, you're saying I'm, I'm too herky jerky, I'm too, you know.

[285] And I need to just...

[286] Here in Argentina, we are more lazy, you know?

[287] Yeah.

[288] All right, so I'll just do this a lot.

[289] Yeah, I'll kind of walk around.

[290] Well, not that much like a zombie, you know, but they're not zombies.

[291] Wait, so less zombie.

[292] Good.

[293] This is how I could use.

[294] Less Nazi, less zombie.

[295] a more chill I think you could help me we are weird we are weird we are weird people no no I don't think so I think that maybe I would find my true self if I came to Argentina because I would relax you know and I I think way deep down there's an inner sensuality that's never been allowed to boil and I think maybe that could happen in Buenos Aires you have to come guys you will it's very funny here you will have a good time.

[296] Okay.

[297] Well, and could we, is it okay if I stayed with you?

[298] Oh.

[299] Oh, yes.

[300] Do you have room?

[301] Yes.

[302] We are, yeah, we are a lot here.

[303] You, you, you sleep with my, with my twins.

[304] No, they have to go.

[305] Not my daughter.

[306] Not my daughter.

[307] No, no. I want all of them out.

[308] They all have to go stay someplace else when I'm there.

[309] You take, you take them to school.

[310] You take them to sports and.

[311] You have to do things.

[312] You have to do things.

[313] You have to earn your keep.

[314] All right.

[315] So I got to take your kids to school and kind of look after the place.

[316] And I'll bunk with your twin boys.

[317] Okay.

[318] How old are they again?

[319] They have 12.

[320] Okay.

[321] All right.

[322] I can handle that.

[323] I have a 15 -year -old daughter.

[324] Okay.

[325] The name is Juana.

[326] Juana.

[327] Okay.

[328] All right.

[329] Well, I'm going to think about this, but you're in a very impressive guy.

[330] Very impressive guy, Sebastian.

[331] Okay.

[332] Thank you.

[333] And it was very nice meeting you.

[334] And this painting.

[335] just is very impressive.

[336] I like it.

[337] Okay, thanks, man. I was wondering what to do, and I know you like history and, well, and dress shoes.

[338] History and dress shoes, yes.

[339] Yeah, we don't have that money for the costume, you know.

[340] Yeah, I understand.

[341] Well, thank you very much, Sebastian.

[342] It was an honor to talk to you, and I'm glad that you've been listening to us and please keep listening to us and I hope that we cross paths someday.

[343] Okay, yes, thank you.

[344] I'm with you since a lot of years, so you are a great inspiration for me and thank you to everyone.

[345] Oh, thank you very much, Sebastian.

[346] And you're an inspiration to me. You take care.

[347] Okay, thank you.

[348] Bye -bye.

[349] Bye.

[350] Bye.

[351] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.

[352] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam Obsessian and Matt Gourley.

[353] Produced by me, Matt Gourley.

[354] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Nick Glau, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf.

[355] Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.

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[357] Associate talent producer Jennifer Samples.

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