Don’t Give Yourself an Excuse To Go Into Debt

[0] Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions in Nashville, Tennessee, it's the Ramsey Show.

[1] I'm John Deloney joined by Jade Warshaw, and we're talking about building wealth, your workplace, people you love, people you're in relationship with, your in -laws, all of it.

[2] Triple -8 -8 -25 -5 -2 -2 -5.

[3] We're taking your calls live.

[4] It's AAA 825, 5 -2 -25.

[5] I'm John.

[6] This is Jade, and we are ready to rock and roll.

[7] Let's go out to Madison, Wisconsin, and talk.

[8] talk to Kathleen.

[9] What's up, Kathleen?

[10] Hi there.

[11] How are you doing?

[12] Thanks for taking my call.

[13] Of course.

[14] Thanks for calling in.

[15] What's up?

[16] Well, I was just calling my student, or I have two children.

[17] They just both recently graduated from college.

[18] Both have significant debt, student loan debt.

[19] These are parent plus loans, by the way, for a total of $400 ,000.

[20] with both of them and they're not able to make their minimum wage so I or their minimum payment so I'm picking up the slack and also I have other financial you know concerns as well why did you sign for a parent plus loan because when you go to college that's what they tell you to do okay so So what does it look like you picking up the slack?

[21] What does that mean?

[22] So the loans are split into two different, my sons and my daughters.

[23] My daughter owes probably around 300 ,000.

[24] Is he a doctor?

[25] No, they're both engineers.

[26] And they both have jobs now, and they both make pretty decent money for being, you know, right out of college.

[27] What do they make?

[28] What does that mean?

[29] My daughter makes about $60 ,000.

[30] My son makes about $55 ,000 a year.

[31] That's not a good job for an engineer owes $300 ,000.

[32] Right.

[33] Are they single?

[34] Do they have families?

[35] They are both single.

[36] Okay.

[37] My son does live with his girlfriend, but who, and she's also an engineer.

[38] but I am picking up my daughter does live at home with us my husband and I and she's paying as much as she can out of her paycheck you know every month she her loan is probably around 4 ,500 a month and she probably pays about 4 ,000 and I pick up the other 500 my goodness my son actually just got a job in April so he had been a year out of school without he was working for my husband who is he's self -employed but making you know minimum wage just over minimum wage about $18 an hour tell me tell me a little bit more about the like inception of this when you picked up these parent plus loans because typically a parent plus loan is the parent is signing for it therefore the parent plans to pay it unless you've stipulated else.

[39] What was the original agreement?

[40] Was it, hey, we're taking these out because we're going to pay for it, or we're taking these out and you guys are going to pay them back?

[41] And by the way, it's going to be this much money.

[42] Yeah, that was the agreement that they would pay them back.

[43] And did they know how much they were taking out at the time?

[44] Yes.

[45] Okay.

[46] So my daughter, I mean, there's a lot of things involved, but my daughter actually went to a private school for eight years.

[47] My son went.

[48] to a public school, what, for seven years.

[49] We had some deaths in the family.

[50] Okay.

[51] And then my next question is, was there any piece of you that said, hey, don't do this?

[52] Or you guys were like, yeah, just tell me where to sign.

[53] Yeah, you can blame the system, but at some point, you know, $300 ,000, mom.

[54] Yeah.

[55] Well, you know, at first, you know, you're going to go to school for four years.

[56] Okay, it's going to cost this X amount of dollars.

[57] And then you don't make it four years.

[58] Now it's X amount of dollars.

[59] And my daughter did say to me about five years or six years into this.

[60] Like, I don't know if I can finish school.

[61] And I said, well, it's too late now you have to because you have student loan debt that you have to pay.

[62] And you quitting and not getting a good paying job is not going to pay those.

[63] So at this point, can you answer this question for me?

[64] Are you paying the $500 because your name is on this and you're trying to protect your credit and protect your whatever or are you paying on this because you feel that you should help because if we're just looking at it as it is if the agreement was and if I called you know your daughter and son today and said was the agreement that you would pay these back and they said yes that was the agreement and so they corroborate your story then they just need to pay them and that's that on that now if you're like hey they can't pay them and this is jacking with my credit then I'd say okay yeah you made your bed and you have to lay in it and so yeah you have to fill the gaps because you were part you were a co -conspirator on this and so there's really no there's no way out of this other than somebody pays these loans and they're at fault they're at fault because they said hey yeah i'll pay them back but mom and dad y 'all are at fault too this is not good yeah it's not good yeah i agree i mean i think a lot of things need to change with the higher educational system yeah but hold on i'm at there to do that yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah, Kathleen, and it's like, well, they just told us to, they did, but man, y 'all signed them.

[65] And I think until you take ownership of this, and it might mean, you have to go get an ownership.

[66] Do what?

[67] I have definitely taken ownership.

[68] I mean, I am paying the student loans back.

[69] I just, I guess, like, I know that they need to be paid, and like if they can't pay them, then I'm responsible for that.

[70] I know that.

[71] But hold on.

[72] you have created a world that your kids are dictating what you do and that's how we end up here okay and at some point as my friend henry cloud says they have to get some problems and they can say the words we can't pay these bills because they know you're going to pick up the slack despite the agreement y 'all made if they didn't have you as a backstop they'd have to figure something out, which means your son would have to get an engineering job making more than 50 grand.

[73] And he'd also have to deliver pizzas and Instacart on the weekends.

[74] And you'd have to live in a one -bedroom apartment.

[75] Yeah.

[76] Yeah, I mean, they know all of that.

[77] But they're not doing it.

[78] And you're picking up the slack.

[79] And they know that.

[80] And until you sit down with a conversation say, okay, you got two more months and then I'm not sending another penny.

[81] Y 'all are on your own.

[82] gonna go yeah right and then it happens yeah i mean until you hold that boundary they're not i mean why would they right and they haven't their whole life i know a number of parents when i was working at the university system jade that would tell their kids you got four years oh yeah that's all i'm paying and if you need to go to year five and six it's on you you better get that you better get your grades done you better get your work done because i'm paying for four years that's it yeah i think it's good when you put the steam on a little bit um especially because your name is on these.

[83] I remember kind of similar, but not really similar.

[84] You know, my husband and I had student loans and many of them his mom signed for.

[85] And so she was like, you need to pay these loans because I'm trying to buy a house.

[86] And this is making my, this is messing with my credit.

[87] And so there's part of it that's like, it just is what it is.

[88] And I mean, I remember us going back and forth being like, listen, you signed for these two.

[89] So you're going to have to be patient.

[90] This is just created a, it just creates a rift in those relationships that unfortunately really doesn't go away until they're paid off.

[91] That's exactly right.

[92] And I don't think there's going to be.

[93] be any urgency for these kids to pay these off as long as they're living in your house, making half of what they should be making out in the marketplace, because mom's going to bail us out.

[94] I think you have to step up and say, here's a boundary, and I've never held boundaries like this for you, you too, and these are new, but these are going to be in stone.

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[131] Hi, Jay.

[132] Thank you so much for taking my call.

[133] You got it, man. What's up?

[134] So I have a little bit of a work dilemma.

[135] I found out that I'm eligible for a severance, a voluntary severance package program, and I'm debating whether or not I should take it.

[136] Tell us more.

[137] Well, I like my team.

[138] The job itself, I'm not really too interested in the field, although it's what I've been doing for most of my professional career.

[139] And in hindsight, it might not be a lot of money, but I'm currently debt -free.

[140] And I would feel pretty confident that I would be able to get another job if I were to stay in a same field.

[141] Why don't you do what you actually want to do?

[142] I guess that part of it is I'm not too sure, you know, what career I would want.

[143] I know that if I were to stay in the field, I currently work in, I currently work in tax.

[144] I'm an accountant.

[145] Okay.

[146] And so I'm depending whether or not I should take advantage of this program, even though I've only been with this company for a handful of years and move on to something else.

[147] Or if I should pick it out here.

[148] What would you have done if they never offered you the severance package?

[149] Would you be looking?

[150] Originally when I took this job, I realistically didn't see myself staying for more than five or six years.

[151] To what?

[152] To what end?

[153] The end goal would eventually be to get a job and move and relocate at a state or find something more remote.

[154] But get a job doing what?

[155] Right now, what I'm currently doing and hopefully try to transition to something.

[156] else once I have a better picture of what that is.

[157] Is there something financially that's on fire in your life that's making a bigger chunk of money look good to you?

[158] No, not particularly.

[159] I'm debt -free.

[160] Okay.

[161] What is the severance package?

[162] So between the severance package, stock options, and unused PTO, before taxes, it would be around 32, 33K.

[163] What do you make a year?

[164] course salary is 93 ,000 guys they're paying you four months salary basically yeah here's my bigger concern it sounds like you keep waiting for your life just to show up for you and that's just not how it works because if you're going to quit this job and go work something that you you don't love the job but you love your team and they dangle a couple of months of salary in front of you and you bail but you're not bailing towards a different career that you actually want or management that you want or a different state than you want but you're just going to go to another tax place in the same town the only risk you have here is you're you're gambling $30 something thousand dollars on having a team that's awful versus the known and so if you were telling me this is going to be my break I'm going to take four months and retool I'm going to work really hard.

[165] We're going to give you, Ken Coleman's get clear assessment.

[166] Like, what do I actually want to do?

[167] How is AI going to impact just basic tax work?

[168] Do I want, is this job going to be here in five years, right?

[169] You need to ask those questions and then get serious about taking steps towards what's next.

[170] If you think your company's going to close down around you in the next six months, then yeah, I would take the first exit off, off the ramp.

[171] If you have another job lined up and you're ready to rock and roll, I would take the first exit off, take the $30 ,000 and run.

[172] But all you're telling me is, no, I don't really like this.

[173] But I'm just going to take their money and keep doing the same thing somewhere else.

[174] And I'm pretty sure I can get something else.

[175] You see what I'm saying?

[176] It just kind of feels like wet bread, just milk toast, just to e' to e' to e'.

[177] And I just don't think that's a good path for anybody.

[178] Yeah, yeah, it's really the, I guess it's the unknown.

[179] That's the fear for if they're offering something like this now, then, you know, do they anticipate layoffs or, you know, terminations within the next year or two.

[180] Yeah.

[181] Is it something that I should take advantage of right now?

[182] That's kind of where my mind was going.

[183] To be honest, I wanted you to ask more questions around this offer.

[184] And I think that's one of the things I would go back and do.

[185] If you have a leader, you know, you said you like the people you work with.

[186] So hopefully you have a leader that you can trust and say, hey, tell me more about this.

[187] What's coming in the future?

[188] If I don't, is this you guys trying to take care of me now before things get worse?

[189] and just have a couple of candid conversations because that'll tell you a lot as well as opposed to kind of guessing and being afraid to ask.

[190] Will they be honest with you?

[191] Yes.

[192] Okay.

[193] I think Jade's guidance is wise.

[194] Every place I've ever worked as a senior leader when we offered buyouts, it was always a precursor to if this doesn't solve our problem, we have to go to the next level, which is letting people go.

[195] That was 100 % of the time.

[196] I can only speak in my experiences, but it happened at multiple places.

[197] I don't see why it wouldn't be.

[198] like otherwise what's the point yeah yeah exactly that that was my thought process um and so it's it's unknown of their underlying tones of the business is doing poorly and they're offering this to employees and is something i need to take and then jump ship before before i'm out of a job so and here's how i would not walk up to my supervisor and say hey i'm thinking about taking this money because then you've already you've already set sale um now their job is to talk you into following your instinct because they don't want someone on their team that is halfway in.

[199] I would sit down and say, hey, this is really strange.

[200] I love working here with this team and the whole idea is making me uncomfortable.

[201] We all work in numbers and so we all know how math works.

[202] What's the real picture here?

[203] And then hopefully they'll tell you, yeah, it's pretty dicey.

[204] And a good supervisor would say you're going to be fine no matter what.

[205] I would hope you stay.

[206] Or a good supervisor who loves you, who knows it's getting dicey, we'll tell you, bro take the train out of town it's a good run but i love jade's wisdom right and dude i just want to lean on you man you only get one life bro and the more you just like in five or six years i just hope it changes it's not going to it's going to be the exact same life in five or six years unless you actively right now seek to change it hang on the line we're going to send you ken coleman's brand new book and the get clear assessment and get you hooked up and get you thinking about what comes next 5 -225.

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[217] What up, what up?

[218] I'm John.

[219] This is The Ramsey Show, joined by my good friend, Jade Warshall.

[220] We're taking your calls on money and life and work and relationships and your mental health, all of it.

[221] AAA 825, 5 -225.

[222] Let's go out to the SLC and talk to Will.

[223] What up, Will?

[224] How we doing?

[225] Hey, John.

[226] Hey, Jade.

[227] How we doing?

[228] We're doing all right, man. How about you?

[229] Well, I could do it a little bit better, you know, just trying to figure out where I go from here.

[230] What happened?

[231] So I run a business.

[232] We've been doing this for about two months now, and it's a distribution company, and so what we do is we distribute sod around all of the Salt Lake Valley.

[233] Cool.

[234] And yesterday, I got home from my morning deliveries.

[235] I parked the truck and went home to go get some lunch, and I get a call from one of the neighbors saying, are you on site?

[236] And I say no. And they say, well, your truck's on fire.

[237] Oh, man. And so, and so, yeah, so I rush over there.

[238] I can see smoke from my apartment.

[239] Wow.

[240] You know, yeah, so it was and by the time I got there, the whole thing was just gone.

[241] Do you have, do you have enemies?

[242] Do you have enemies out there?

[243] I don't know.

[244] I really don't know.

[245] Bro, hey, listen, I've seen this movie.

[246] It's a rival sod company.

[247] Yeah, probably what it is.

[248] It's game on in Salt Lake City.

[249] So what happens?

[250] The trucks on fire.

[251] Trucks on fire.

[252] I roll up and, you know, cops and fire departments everywhere trying to put it out.

[253] Luckily, no one was hurt.

[254] And, you know, I keep thinking that this was probably the best place for it to happen.

[255] You know, no, like on the side of the road, at my, you know, at my base of operations, no one was hurt, anything like that.

[256] truck was fully insured, um, so we're good there, but, okay.

[257] So how can we help, man?

[258] Yeah.

[259] So, other than just being sad with you.

[260] So my question is, where do I go from here?

[261] Um, I'm, I'm financially speaking.

[262] So, you know, because I know this is, I, my assumption is that I, I assume the truck was worth about $70 ,000.

[263] It was fully paid off.

[264] Okay.

[265] So it's worth $70.

[266] What's the insurance given you?

[267] I assume it was worth $70.

[268] I bought it for $30.

[269] but I felt like it was a good deal at the time and I know trucks that are worth what's insurance giving you I don't know yet it was the adjuster talked to me this morning we're just waiting on we're just waiting on claims for the adjuster come out look at it and determine what the value was on it so they need to turn that around real quick and tell me you have a business contingent on this truck and then I'd go rent a truck for the time being yeah so what I've been doing is I've been contracting out the truck.

[270] I still make a margin on the product itself, you know.

[271] And so like, so I've just been kind of in full truck shopping mode.

[272] But my question is, I guess fully on, on a more just level, you know, I'm kind of looking at this is kind of a baptism by fire, I guess you could say, and kind of saying, how do I set the business up from here to succeed?

[273] Don't do anything stupid.

[274] And you're about to, so don't.

[275] Don't.

[276] Yeah.

[277] Don't.

[278] Yeah.

[279] I don't think one, it's almost like one thing doesn't have anything to do with the other.

[280] You know, the truck's on fire.

[281] Insurance is going to come out.

[282] They're going to give you, if you said it was fully covered and you had the right coverage, you're going to get the money you need to replace it at value.

[283] And here's the thing.

[284] Let's pretend that they don't give you as much as you feel like they should have.

[285] Still only spend what they give you on the next truck.

[286] This is not an excuse to go into debt on the next one.

[287] You said that you got the other one at a crazy deal anyway.

[288] Really, it was only worth.

[289] You spent 35 ,000.

[290] So, So hopefully that's what they'll give you and you can spend that again.

[291] Well, and also you call it a great deal.

[292] Dude, it caught on fire.

[293] It wasn't that great of a deal, right?

[294] Yeah, fair enough.

[295] So it wasn't that great of a truck.

[296] So maybe spend 50, if they give you a check for 70.

[297] Spend 50, but the other 20 in a bank account for your company.

[298] You, you, though, are about to go buy a $120 ,000 truck, aren't you?

[299] No, no, no, no, no. I am not.

[300] My mindset's always been frugal.

[301] I do not.

[302] I don't like spending more than my word.

[303] So then what's the other part of the question when you're saying, how can I set my business up to succeed from here on out?

[304] Tell us where you don't feel like you are succeeding, and then we can help you out.

[305] Well, I guess the big thing is financially, I just want to know how do I structure this business to succeed.

[306] So I'm fully out of debt.

[307] Okay.

[308] All I have is account payable and my lease, and that's about it.

[309] Okay, good.

[310] I just want to make sure that I'm on the right track.

[311] You are.

[312] you are and I feel you just got hit the mouth that's it you're moving at the speed of cash the best possible thing that you can do is move at the speed of cash and not be tempted to do things i'm going to put it like this do things to prove that you have a business which is buying things that you don't really need buying a bunch of uh equipment or merchandise or office space that you truly don't need hiring people before it's time just so you can be like i've got employees like all that stuff as long as you're moving at the right time and you're not doing anything for show and you're moving at cash, I think for where you are and what you're doing, I think you're right on track and just keeping good books, like making sure that you know your numbers.

[313] That's the best you can do.

[314] And let's flip this around.

[315] Let's say you were like most small business owners in America who's starting a business.

[316] You would owe $50 ,000.

[317] You would have bought an $85 ,000 truck that burned to the ground.

[318] They're going to write you a check for 40 grand and you'd owe $40 ,000.

[319] Yeah.

[320] So you can't see it because you just watched your truck, your livelihood burn up in front of you the other day.

[321] Jade and I are sitting here saying you're doing this exactly right.

[322] You had a fully insured paid off truck just for this moment so that if it catches on fire and explodes in the neighbor's driveway you're just going to get a check for another one.

[323] You're going to go get another used truck and keep right on going.

[324] Yeah.

[325] You're doing it right.

[326] Okay.

[327] And maybe I just need a little bit of reassurance on that.

[328] You just watch something pretty traumatic.

[329] Your whole business felt like it burned up in front of you.

[330] I know.

[331] I think it's kind of ironic.

[332] I've been starting the story of Joe for the last week, and this is kind of what happened.

[333] And we always tell people, when you start a business or you start trying to get on the same page with your partner with money, expect Murphy to show up.

[334] It's just going to test your boundary and see how honest and committed you are.

[335] Yeah.

[336] No, I totally agree.

[337] By the way, I appreciate it.

[338] There's no chance they give you a 70 ,000.

[339] check.

[340] Here's what I want you to be careful.

[341] I knew that.

[342] That's why I'm over -evaluating.

[343] Okay, but here's what's going to happen.

[344] They're going to write you a check for 60, which is, what, 20 more than you paid for it, 30 more than you paid for it, and you're going to feel like they stole 10 grand from you, and it's going to leave a bad taste in your mouth.

[345] Just be very open -handed.

[346] What's the truck actually worth when it exploded and then take that money and go buy yourself a cash truck?

[347] Okay.

[348] And they keep right on going.

[349] How's your business doing?

[350] Yeah, are you making money?

[351] You know what?

[352] I can't complain.

[353] I think within two months, we've grossed about $150 ,000 so far, and so I, you know, as far as the small business goes, I can't complain.

[354] What's your net?

[355] Yeah, what are you netting?

[356] Net, I believe as of right now, we're about 85.

[357] Okay.

[358] 85 ,000 or 8500?

[359] 85 ,000.

[360] Okay.

[361] How many of you guys is it?

[362] Which is me. This is me. I'm a one -man -man -year -old.

[363] Joe.

[364] Okay.

[365] And what are you taking home?

[366] Are you paying yourself?

[367] Are you taking everything out of the business?

[368] Are you reinvesting?

[369] I, like I say, I live as frugally as possible.

[370] So I just make sure my builder paid on the outside.

[371] I really just, I pay rent and food on my personal side and, you know, my personal vehicle.

[372] And that's about, you know, as far as stealing stuff like that.

[373] But that's about it.

[374] Hold on, homie.

[375] You made $42 ,000 in your first two months as a small business owner?

[376] Yeah.

[377] Yeah.

[378] That's better than, I can't complain.

[379] I'm very grateful from where I'm at.

[380] Yeah.

[381] Hold on.

[382] I want to hear you celebrate it.

[383] I can't complain.

[384] I hate that attitude.

[385] Say, dude, I'm actually crushing it.

[386] I did my research.

[387] I'm doing, I'm serving my community.

[388] I'm serving a need, a glitch in the market, and I'm making it happen.

[389] Say that.

[390] You know what?

[391] I'm making that happen.

[392] There you go.

[393] There you go.

[394] Making $40 ,000 a month, dude.

[395] That's good money, no matter where you are.

[396] No, I agree.

[397] I agree.

[398] All right.

[399] Well, keep, keep at it, man. How do I get on the right page?

[400] You're on the right page.

[401] If you're hiring, holler at me. I'm just, shoot me a direct message because that's really good money.

[402] But, Jade, it's easy when things go sideways to feel like it's all coming down.

[403] 100%.

[404] Plus, he's a brand new business owner.

[405] So he's just shaking it in the shankees anyway.

[406] Dude, good on you, Will.

[407] I'm proud of you, man. I'll send you George Campbell's resume.

[408] He's probably going to want to...

[409] Actually, he's not really an outdoor guy.

[410] Nah.

[411] Nah.

[412] He would hire you, though, to put down his sod.

[413] He definitely would.

[414] No question.

[415] This is the Ramsey show.

[416] We'll be right back.

[417] This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.

[418] Hey good folks, the back -to -school madness is upon us.

[419] It's hitting us right now.

[420] We got travel and work and all these forms to fill out now and sports to travel to and on and on.

[421] My family's schedule is so packed and we haven't even begun talking about things like exercise and date nights and counseling and church and homes.

[422] projects and those are the things that make our life even worth living.

[423] Here's what I've learned.

[424] When it comes to taking care of me, I have to put on my oxygen mask first.

[425] And that means that I have to do the things that keep me well and whole.

[426] And I know that you have to do those same things too.

[427] So don't skip the things that matter to you, including regular exercise, hanging out with your friends and regular therapy appointments.

[428] And when it comes to therapy, contact my friends at Better Help.

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[432] In this upcoming season, make sure you put on your oxygen mask first.

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[434] Call my friends at Better Help Visit betterhelp .com slash deloni today for 10 % off your first month.

[435] That's BetterHelp, H -E -L -P .com slash Deloni.

[436] Hey, welcome back to the Ramsey Show.

[437] If you, like the rest of us, are wringing your hands at the state of the world economy and your frustration about how your neighbors are spending money that they don't have and Congress has spending money you don't have, here's what you can do.

[438] You can sit in your house and watch all the news channels.

[439] get all red face and scream and yell and solve nothing, or you can start to change how your house operates.

[440] And if you want to provide a gift to your neighbor, you can do something as simple as sharing the show, subscribing to the show, putting like a thumbs up, or I don't know how they do it on the internets these days, but just letting the folks know, the five -star reviews, whatever it is.

[441] Letting the internets know, I like this show and other people should watch it, and it puts it in the algorithm and it gets it to your neighbors and to their neighbors and to their neighbors.

[442] This country is going to change household by household, kitchen table by kitchen table.

[443] And that's how we get it done.

[444] So like the show, subscribe the show doesn't cost anything, but like 10 seconds of your time.

[445] And it makes a huge difference for people getting this popping up on their feed and then going down what we call the Ramsey Rabbit Hole and suddenly they decide, hey, I'm going to change my household too.

[446] So thank you so much for supporting the show and the way you do.

[447] It means the world to us.

[448] But more important, and it means the world to your neighbor.

[449] All right, let's go out to Greenville, South Carolina, and talk to not draw, but Drew.

[450] Hey, Drew, what's up, man?

[451] Hey, how's it going?

[452] We're doing great.

[453] How about you?

[454] I'm doing great.

[455] Thank you guys for all that you do.

[456] Thank you, man. What's up?

[457] Yeah, so I have a question.

[458] My wife and I are deciding when would be a good time to upgrade our home and how we should go about doing that.

[459] We currently, my wife stays at home, and she homeschools our four kids, and they're all under the age of 10.

[460] And so I'm the primary income.

[461] She does a little bit of work on the side to help supplement the income there.

[462] We do not have any debt.

[463] We have the emergency.

[464] fund that's fully funded and we're you know so in that baby step four five six area okay and what's your income to yeah our take home is around 1 30 a year and so we're currently in a house and our mortgage what's left on that mortgage is 229 okay and the house is probably worth about 285 somewhere in there but our house is only about 12 to 1 ,300 square feet and having four teenagers in a house that small does not really look attractive to us so what are you trying to do to it you mean I'd like to at some point sell it and move into a larger home within the next two or three years okay so we're just moving up we're not like doing additions or anything like that I like it so yeah we thought about an addition but I'm just not sure it makes sense it's an older house and and just not sure it would would be the best fit for us so you owe 285 on the current mortgage did I get that right no 229 two 29 or mortgage 25 is what's worth about 285 yeah okay and so how how much are you trying to move up like what do you're trying to spend here I you know as we've been looking at our and in the housing market, I'm thinking somewhere from 4 to 4 .50 is probably where we need to be.

[465] Okay.

[466] And so is the plan that we're going to take the winnings from the sale of this house, which is not going to be an incredible amount after fees?

[467] Right.

[468] What do you think you'll take home after fees?

[469] Yeah.

[470] You know, I'm hoping maybe around 35 to 40, but, you know, I really would, I really would like to do this in the next two to three years.

[471] So I'm trying to, I wanted to talk to you guys about how can I use the next two to three years to be able to make that gap greater between what the house is worth and what I owe.

[472] Obviously, I can pay it down.

[473] But what's the, what's the best path for me to be able to get in, to upgrade into a home in the price range we were talking about?

[474] I think it's twofold.

[475] I think that, yes, continue to make extra more payments you've got that margin there and in that way it's just a forced savings account right which I kind of like that because it's different from piling up money in an hysa because then you think oh I've got this money here you know what we do need a new vehicle you know what we do need to take a trip to Europe and so it's easy to kind of look at that money for other things and so in this case technically you guys are on baby steps four or five and six and so I would act in that way and put extra payments towards the mortgage and continue to do that now if you did if you did if it did make you feel better to say, yeah, I'm also going to stack up some cash for a down payment.

[476] I'd probably do both of those things.

[477] And so that you've got both of those things there.

[478] Yeah, because I think you've got the margin to do that.

[479] And then, I mean, I think you know our rule of thumb.

[480] You'll know that you're ready when you can get this $400 ,000 house when you're able to put the right down payment down that allows this to be no more than 25 % of your take home all in.

[481] And that's including things like, you know, homeowners association fees.

[482] yes okay and the ideal mortgage is a 15 year what are you in now currently we're in a 30 year and yeah definitely not ideal we you know we we kind of just came into baby steps four five six so we want to start throwing money at the mortgage but um yeah and we're we don't have a great rate we had to move at a time when it wasn't ideal but so we're you know we're hoping maybe in the future to be able to refinance or maybe if we buy an upgrade that if we move into when we move into a 15 -year mortgage, that the rates will be lower.

[483] Here's what I want to challenge you on.

[484] And this is just, you know, take it, take it or leave it.

[485] The whole point is to be debt -free.

[486] That's the point is to be free, to live free, to live in a home that you pay for.

[487] And I do worry about, I mean, you guys make a good income.

[488] Right now, you know, you owe $229.

[489] That's not crazy.

[490] I would hate for you to refinance into, I would hate that you go into more mortgage for a longer term.

[491] Because so many people say, oh, I'll get the 30 year and pay it like the 15, or I'll get the 30 year and then when I'm ready, I'll refinance.

[492] But life, and the next thing we know, something else kind of takes that priority or takes that place.

[493] And that's the only thing that I would caution you against on, there truly is a piece of this where you may not be ready to upgrade simply because of that alone.

[494] Yeah.

[495] Because of the, you know what I mean?

[496] So weigh that out with your wife because the affordability part does include the style of the loan, you know?

[497] Right, right.

[498] Yeah.

[499] And I mean, it may just take a couple more years of me. Yeah.

[500] Having a lot of kids in a small house.

[501] You'll get to know each other real well.

[502] Well, and Drew, you sound a lot like me, so I don't want to project my experience under you.

[503] But you've got a lot of different.

[504] ideas all happening at the same time.

[505] Yeah.

[506] I think I'm going to refit.

[507] What if we got, what if we just put an apartment on top of this garage?

[508] And I'm also going to spend my spare minute scrolling the housing market in town.

[509] And I'm going to spend a little bit of time being frantic about our rate.

[510] I'm also going to be a little, like, what if we just, I'm going to look up high yields.

[511] Yeah, you're reading me. You're reading me like a book there.

[512] Okay.

[513] So that's me. And here's what we do.

[514] We're like the running back who just runs east to west, side to side to side, a hundred yards, but we only make three yards down the field.

[515] We don't go anywhere.

[516] And we make our wife tired.

[517] We make our kids exhausted.

[518] So here's what I would love you and your wife to sit down.

[519] And this is the only way my wife and I have been able to find peace in these type of journeys.

[520] Let's have a number we're going to have saved up before we move, period.

[521] Okay.

[522] And if you decide, all right, I'm going to buy a $400 ,000 house.

[523] I'm going to get $80 ,000 down payment.

[524] I'm going to have no PMI.

[525] Like, what do we have to do to get $80 ,000?

[526] We're going to sell this house.

[527] We're going to hopefully get 40 for it.

[528] I mean, it's got to make $40 ,000 in cash in an account.

[529] Ready, go.

[530] And now we're not looking at other things.

[531] We're not spinning our wheels.

[532] We are, like, our whole house is focused on getting this number in that account, and then it's going to trigger the next move.

[533] Now we're going to go buy a house.

[534] Yeah.

[535] You see what I'm saying?

[536] No, that's, yeah, that's great.

[537] Yeah, I think, yeah, and I would just offer this to you guys to, My wife and I have been using every dollar now for four to five months, and it has completely changed how we communicate, completely changed, how we budget.

[538] And we're like, I mean, it's like a competition every morning who can drop the expenditures into the bucket and who's, you know, are we, is anything in red?

[539] Wow, we love to hear that.

[540] Dude, that's amazing, man. That's amazing.

[541] We love it.

[542] We couldn't even pay for that kind of commercial.

[543] Thank you, Drew.

[544] Thanks to you, America.

[545] of.

[546] This is The Ramsey Show.

[547] We'll be back.

[548] Live from Ramsey Solutions in Nashville, Tennessee.

[549] It's the Ramsey Show.

[550] We help people with their money, with their relationships, with their work, with just about everything.

[551] I'm John Deloney, joined by my good friend, Jade Warshaw, and we're taking your calls on your money, your mental and emotional health, your relationships, your work, everything.

[552] AAA 825, 5 -2 -25.

[553] That's AAA 825, 5 -2 -25.

[554] Let's go out to Phoenix, Arizona.

[555] God, it's hot.

[556] Talk to Brenda.

[557] Hey, Brenda.

[558] Hello, hello.

[559] It's a pleasure to speak with you.

[560] Thank you.

[561] You too.

[562] Hey, is it a thousand degrees right now?

[563] Not yet, but it's just about there.

[564] Okay.

[565] My goodness.

[566] Just $9 .99.

[567] Good grief.

[568] I don't know how you all do it.

[569] All right, so what's up, Brenda?

[570] So my question essentially is, how do I not feel guilty or selfish for wanting to sell my house?

[571] Why would you feel guilty yourself?

[572] I need more.

[573] Yeah, tell us more.

[574] Sorry, I just got nervous.

[575] We got you.

[576] So the house is mine.

[577] The house is mine.

[578] It's in my name.

[579] Sorry.

[580] That's okay.

[581] Hey, Brenda, take a big, big, deep breath as deep as you can, all the way to your guts.

[582] I'm going to do it, too.

[583] Hold it.

[584] Three, two.

[585] All right, now let it out.

[586] All right.

[587] Pull your shoulders all the way down.

[588] I can hear them up by your ears.

[589] Pull them all the way down.

[590] So the house of mine, and there is seven of, but we're a household of seven, essentially.

[591] We have my two boys and then my boyfriend with his three boys.

[592] If I decided to sell my house, it would be because I want to pay off my debt, and it would bump me into babysat four, five, and six.

[593] it would cause everybody to move and essentially my boyfriend would have to, you know, do his thing, but he'd have to pay more out of pocket as well for his living situation.

[594] So selling my house would really only benefit me in this picture.

[595] Why hasn't he married to yet?

[596] You won't.

[597] Okay.

[598] How long have you been together?

[599] Three and a half years.

[600] Okay.

[601] He has forced you to take care of you.

[602] And so all you're doing is what a responsible adult would do when another adult says, I don't want to have, I want to make a commitment with you.

[603] I want to play house, and I want to have all the benefits of being with you without commitment.

[604] And he's forcing you to have to take care of you as a single mom.

[605] Right?

[606] Yes.

[607] Yes.

[608] Your instincts are right.

[609] You're, okay.

[610] Yeah.

[611] I mean, there's no. John stopped me at any point, but in my mind, I'm like, there's no, there's no together.

[612] There is no us.

[613] So why do you want me to operate out of an us?

[614] You've made it very clear.

[615] And so that's kind of where I'm at.

[616] The two kids, so you said he's got three boys that are his and you've got two boys that are yours.

[617] Yeah.

[618] You guys have any children together?

[619] No. Listen.

[620] No. You know, this is a major red flag and I am.

[621] You know, for me, it's a no. Brenda, there's something else going on.

[622] What is it?

[623] No, it's just, I think I just need that validated.

[624] And in talks that I've asked him to move out already.

[625] And he just kind of ignored that request.

[626] So I'm just like, well, maybe I should sell my house.

[627] That's what I'm telling you.

[628] There's something else going on here.

[629] What is it?

[630] Is he safe?

[631] He's a bully.

[632] Yeah, no, no. We're safe.

[633] We just don't, I mean, like you said, he hasn't committed.

[634] He won't commit.

[635] He's made comments that he will never put a ring on it, though.

[636] I know that that's there.

[637] I just don't like the idea of moving and uprooting my children.

[638] But you don't have to uproot your family.

[639] You can call the police and have them remove somebody from your home.

[640] Yeah.

[641] We're not, it's not unsafe.

[642] It's not an unsafe situation.

[643] Anybody who's...

[644] He's broken up with you.

[645] He won't leave.

[646] that's a bully move like I'm not saying that he's like screaming at you and in beating you or something but I'm saying that if I've asked a male to leave my home and he won't leave it's because he knows and you can't make me that's that's after the dot dot dot dot I got you see what I'm saying muscles and you can't push me out of here and that's what 911 is for yeah yeah and I know that sounds ridiculous but jade and I do this for living deal with hot -headed men that think they can push women around.

[647] Yeah.

[648] He has broken up with you.

[649] He has looked you in the eye and said, there is no future for us.

[650] But I'm going to live here.

[651] I'm going to get what I want, when I want, and you're going to pay for my sons to grow up in your house.

[652] Yeah, I think in his eyes, he hasn't broken up with me because he thinks everything's fine, even though I'm the one telling him I want him to move out.

[653] Do you see the disrespect there or just the lack of even hearing or seeing you?

[654] I definitely feel it.

[655] Your guts right.

[656] Okay.

[657] You have two strangers validating you.

[658] But if you want to sell this house and get out of debt, we'll talk you through that, but I don't want you selling your house to run away from him because it's your house.

[659] Well, I mean, financially, I should sell it as well.

[660] The mortgage and housing expenses take up 50 % of my income.

[661] Okay, yes, ma 'am.

[662] Sell the house.

[663] Sell it.

[664] So I just felt like if I sold it, I could pay off all my debt.

[665] And what will you do, rent an apartment or rent a house?

[666] It probably rent a house for two years or so.

[667] Have you priced that out?

[668] Because rent is super high.

[669] Especially in Phoenix.

[670] Mm -hmm.

[671] It's right, but it's less than what I'm paying now.

[672] How much less?

[673] My mortgage is $3 ,400, so I can probably get a three -bedroom house, I think, for $25.

[674] Okay.

[675] And what's your take -home pay every month?

[676] I grow.

[677] Take -home, well, I grow with $100 ,000, so take -home is probably $6 ,000, $6 ,500.

[678] Okay.

[679] Yeah, I want you looking at those numbers really closely.

[680] we're going to set you up with every dollar so that you can see those numbers, because I want you knowing exactly how much money you bring home every month.

[681] Yeah, I have every dollar.

[682] Oh, you do?

[683] Very cool.

[684] I have the premium version.

[685] I just don't have, I didn't have that number in front of me. Okay, no worries.

[686] No worries.

[687] Yeah, I think that renting is a good idea, I think, to get you out of this because long term, unless you told me, yeah, I see a path, jade to where in a year this will be different for me financially, but if you don't see that, then, yeah, how long have you?

[688] You lived in the house?

[689] Two and a half years.

[690] Okay.

[691] Are you going to make any money on it?

[692] Yeah.

[693] Yeah, it should come out with about 150 ,000.

[694] Okay.

[695] Okay, great.

[696] So let me confirm what your boyfriend says about you.

[697] Yes, you're being selfish.

[698] You're taking care of you.

[699] And that is 100 % the position he has put you in.

[700] And as a mom, that is your job to take care of you and your boys.

[701] Period.

[702] Thank you so much.

[703] When you sell this house, I want you to get the best possible help and get top dollars.

[704] So I want you to go to rs .com slash agent and find one of our real estate pros to help you with this, okay?

[705] They're going to get you hooked up.

[706] Man, I got all kinds of thoughts.

[707] I'm going to keep them to myself.

[708] Keep them to yourself, John.

[709] This is The Ramsey Show.

[710] Welcome back to The Ramsey Show.

[711] I'm John Deloney joined by Jade Warshall.

[712] All right, today's question of the day comes from Shauna in Canada.

[713] Yeah, she says, I'm seeking a. advice on how to explain the benefits of combining our accounts to my husband.

[714] He brings in the majority of income as I am a part -time teacher and mom.

[715] He often has to electronically transfer money to me, which I've explained feels degrading.

[716] I want us to be a team, but he refuses to budge on linking our accounts.

[717] What should I say to him?

[718] I feel as if I'm a burden.

[719] I am so sorry.

[720] Oh gosh, I'm so sorry it shouldn't feel that way um i have things i want to say but john nope you say it okay i was gonna say i thought i saw a twinkle in your eye but it was rage it was mad it was anger is what you saw yeah you know first off i just want to affirm that yeah you're right you should be combining accounts and i love that you've it sounds like you've used a a great vocabulary in explaining the way this feels you're saying hey this is degrading to me i feel like i'm a burden to you it's not just like we should combine our money and you're keeping us from doing that.

[721] It doesn't sound like, it sounds like you've expressed yourself well on this.

[722] And I hate that he has disregarded your emotions.

[723] Um, this is a case for counseling and counseling alone.

[724] And I'll let John get into the rest.

[725] I mean, I just think anytime you look at a romantic partner and say the thing, this thing that you're doing is degrading to me. Yeah.

[726] And they look at you and go, I don't care.

[727] Then your relationship has fundamental foundational issues.

[728] This isn't about money and in savings accounts.

[729] Oh, you're beyond that.

[730] This is about power.

[731] And I feel like I'm just a bill that you have to pay every month.

[732] You are.

[733] You are.

[734] Well, then there's a part of me. And I don't like reading into people's situations when I don't have all the information.

[735] But I think we've done this long enough that we kind of start to know.

[736] It always, for me, there's this piece of it like, okay, but then what are you hiding?

[737] Always.

[738] What are you hiding?

[739] Always.

[740] You know?

[741] If you don't want me to see this, if you don't want me to see this, if you If I can't have access to it, if I have to ask you, what is it that you're trying to keep me from?

[742] Or what are you spending money on that you don't want me to know about?

[743] Yeah.

[744] And anytime you're in a relationship with anybody, mother, daughter, father, son, romantic, work relationship.

[745] If one person in that relationship feels like a burden, I mean, not to get too dark, but that's one of the three legs of the stool when you're doing a suicide assessment.

[746] as somebody says, I feel like the world is better if I'm not here.

[747] The greatest gift I could give the people who love me is to not be here because I'm a burden, right?

[748] So I'm super sensitive to that word.

[749] And when somebody has to keep asking their husband, hey, I'm taking care of all the kids and I'm teaching, we need some grocery money.

[750] Well, hold on.

[751] Let me electronically send it over.

[752] Let me Venmo it to you.

[753] Yeah, man. In my guts, that hurts, ma 'am.

[754] Well, you know, let's take a moment and talk about this on a grander scale because obviously, Shauna, yeah, you guys got to get into counseling.

[755] And just to be clear, like there's some very clear boundaries that need to be put in place.

[756] John, why don't you give her a couple more clues on like what these boundaries need to be and kind of like timelines?

[757] Well, I think the conversation is, hey, I've looked you in the eye, the person that I said, I commit my life to until death to his part.

[758] I've told you that the way we are handling money and the way you are choosing to treat me is degrading.

[759] And I've asked for a partnership here and you've said no, I'm unable to communicate this any further.

[760] I'm going to go see a counselor and I'm asking you to come with me because we have some fundamental communication issues.

[761] He's going to say no. And if he says no, then you have to have your or what.

[762] Yeah.

[763] And most couples, those people don't like to go there.

[764] The or what?

[765] Because here's what I promise you.

[766] She knows, Shauna knows, there's other things.

[767] going on here.

[768] This is never just about the money.

[769] This is a part of a bigger picture.

[770] The way he treats you, the way he talks to her, the way he doesn't show up, the way he says, mind your business, this is an entire picture in this tiny little, this little, these few little sentences here.

[771] It is.

[772] And so, Sean, you have to be willing to look in the mirror and say, I'm worth not living my life under the thumb of somebody that treats me like a burden.

[773] And that means I have to be worth shining the light on all this nonsense.

[774] and shining that, turning that light on may cost you everything.

[775] Yeah.

[776] It may cost you the marriage.

[777] He may say, nope, I want my, I want to flex and I want to treat you like a child more than I want to be a partner with you, more than I want to be married to you, be your husband.

[778] And maybe she turns with the lights on and he says, oh my God, I'm so sorry.

[779] Yeah.

[780] And he comes to, that's my hope, right?

[781] I hope so.

[782] Well, let's, let's zoom this out to reach a little bit of a broader audience because there's something you talk about a twinkle in your eye.

[783] when I see that a couple has to electronically transfer money to and from each other, like I talk to couples all the time, John, that maybe they've just both agreed, yeah, we don't want to share our money.

[784] We like doing our own thing.

[785] And they're Venmoing each other for rent and Venmoing each other because they went out to a nice dinner and he paid and now I have to pay my half.

[786] That right there, nothing strikes me as more absurd than me laying in the bed with my husband at night and rolling over and say, hey, did you remember to Venmo me that 30 bucks you owe me?

[787] Yeah, I did $18.

[788] We went to Arby's yesterday.

[789] 18 bucks, remember?

[790] I mean, nothing puts just the kibosh on romanticism quicker than saying, hey, you owe me $30 for my roast beef sandwich.

[791] Or holding holding the human that y 'all created together.

[792] Yes.

[793] And holding the baby and going, hey, by the way, I need you to Vimmy 30 bucks for the water bill.

[794] Because, uh.

[795] Yeah.

[796] Or what happens?

[797] It's madness.

[798] It's madness.

[799] What happens if, okay, you have the worst possible day of your life, right?

[800] You get fired and you come home.

[801] You, you know, you just all the confidence is drained out of you.

[802] And then on top of all of that, you have to realize, how am I going to pay my wife for rent?

[803] Right.

[804] How am I going to pay my wife for rent?

[805] Hey, I got you for the next two months, but you're going to have to.

[806] I mean, or what does it look like?

[807] Let's go a step further.

[808] He makes $200 ,000 a year.

[809] She makes $60 ,000.

[810] thousand a year.

[811] He wants to go to Ruth's Chris.

[812] He orders a steak and she gets the side salad because what she can't afford?

[813] Like how does this work?

[814] Right.

[815] It's it's it's a paper mache home.

[816] It's not real.

[817] Nothing.

[818] I mean, I can't imagine anything more divisive and anything else that would just put so much separation and create almost like a class system in your own home.

[819] Yeah.

[820] Then not combining your money where your money is your heart is also.

[821] And I think I think ultimately, lead jade that's the challenge um in the chaos that is modern day marriage um i think it's never been more important for kids i think it's never been more important for us as just individuals the idea of marriage is is becoming so so important yeah um and i honestly think we don't know how to do it and i don't know how to do i don't think we understand the depths of what that covenant and what that commitment actually means and i i i do you do i get it that people are like whoa whoa you have to go all all in?

[822] It's like that's the only way that works.

[823] And people go part of the way in and then they're upset that it didn't work.

[824] And of course it didn't work.

[825] Because the only way it works is to go all in.

[826] And that's also the only way you get really, really hurt.

[827] And that's that's the other side of it, right?

[828] That is true.

[829] You got to go all in.

[830] And it's hard and it's scary and we don't have a lot of models for what that looks like.

[831] But at the same time, if you have the guts to look at your wife.

[832] With tears in her eyes, after she gets home from teaching and taking care of the kids and looks at you and says, I need some grocery money.

[833] And you're like, well, I'll see.

[834] Let me see if I can Venmo it over to you.

[835] God help you, man. God help you.

[836] That's horrible.

[837] It's all I say it all the time.

[838] And Sam's like, Jade, why are you telling folks this?

[839] But I say it all the time, I'm like, listen, if I ever came home, like Sam Warshall would never even try it, number one, thank God.

[840] No, he's a great human.

[841] He's a great human being.

[842] But if he ever said to me, Jade, you know what?

[843] You have the babies.

[844] I'll take the bank account.

[845] You would never see him again.

[846] I'd get a call at my house.

[847] Hey, John, I needed you to help me hide a body.

[848] And I'd help you, but I like Sam.

[849] I'd be hard.

[850] I'd be like, I'd be like Sam didn't make it.

[851] I help you, but I like Sam.

[852] I wouldn't like that.

[853] He would never try it.

[854] Thank God.

[855] Well, and I have never thought of it.

[856] I've never thought of what you just said, but could you imagine?

[857] I'm just trying to imagine laying in bed at night, the shades are drawn, and I look over, and I'm expecting like, this might be the night.

[858] And my wife says, hey, I need $48 for groceries.

[859] Can you just Venmo me real quick?

[860] And then you say, yeah, but you already owe me 14 from last week.

[861] Wait, hold on, we went to Chick -fil -A three weeks ago, and you owe me $6 .95.

[862] It's the worst.

[863] light switch on putting on golden girls share your accounts if you're going to share your DNA share your accounts this is the ramsie show welcome back to the ramsie show i'm john deloney joined by jade warshault triple eight two five five two two five selling the house selling a house the ramsie way makes home ownership a blessing instead of a burden the ramsie trusted program is the only way to find an agent you can trust to keep you on track with what we teach you at Ramsey and get you the best offer on your house or find the right house for you.

[864] I know I just did it.

[865] I used a Ramsey trusted real estate agent recently and she was amazing.

[866] We send you some of the top agents in your area who we trust.

[867] You review their stats, interview them and decide which one you want to work with.

[868] Ramsey trusted agents have years of experience and will help you make wise decisions when it comes to pricing, marketing, and making or choosing the right offer.

[869] Go to Ramsey, Ramsey Solutions .com slash agent to find a Ramsey trusted real estate agent for free.

[870] It doesn't cost you anything.

[871] Ramsey Solutions .com slash agent.

[872] Do it.

[873] I just did it.

[874] It's good enough for the Deloni family.

[875] It's good enough for you to check it out.

[876] All right.

[877] Let's go to Los Angeles, California, the city of Angels, and talk to Jesse.

[878] What's up, Jesse?

[879] Hey, John.

[880] Hi, I'm new to the show.

[881] I've been listening to you guys.

[882] for a couple of weeks now.

[883] Welcome to the cult, my man. Yeah, it's awesome.

[884] I was reading the baby steps and going through them, and I realized I was in step two and four at the same time and kind of put me in a pickle with my dad.

[885] Ooh, you like so many.

[886] All right, so sit back.

[887] We're going to give you some Kool -Aid, and we're going to drink this, and then we're going to get it squared up for you.

[888] So tell us what's going on.

[889] So I have a truck.

[890] This is where I feel like I'm the king of backwards.

[891] I bought a truck, sold my old, I had an SUV.

[892] I ended up having a little, currently I have equity on it, or I'm upside up on it.

[893] It's worth, I owe 16, and I can get 41 for it.

[894] And that's for a truck?

[895] For a truck.

[896] You owe 16 ,000, and you can get 4 ,100 for, or 41 ,000 for it?

[897] No, 41 ,000.

[898] Jesse, well played, man. All right, man. Okay, so what's next?

[899] That was, so I'm, my question.

[900] is to sell it and then start tackling my debt with the net 25 that I would get out of it.

[901] Yeah.

[902] How much debt do you have?

[903] I have about 50 ,000.

[904] Okay, so yeah, definitely doing that deal.

[905] Let me go back to the first thing you said, where you said you're at Baby Step 2 and Baby Step 4 at the same time.

[906] That means you have debt, but you're investing?

[907] Yes, I was investing 15 % of my net every check.

[908] Yeah.

[909] If I were you, I would pause that so that you have more money to pay off the remaining $25 ,000 of debt that you have, and you can knock it out super quick.

[910] What's your income?

[911] So I'm grossing maybe $2 .5.

[912] Dude, good for you, Jesse.

[913] You're crushing it, man. What do you do for living?

[914] I procuremen for a big box company or a big warehouse.

[915] Dude, good for you, man. Congratulations.

[916] Well, thank you.

[917] I'm trying, but I still feel like I realize I was.

[918] sick and tired of being sick and tired.

[919] Awesome.

[920] So that's where I was like, well, we, I'm like listening to you guys.

[921] I'm like, wait a minute.

[922] But one thing I did hear you guys mentioned, like, in the previous segment, if it's not half of your income, I believe, for the truck that you owe should be okay.

[923] Yeah, so we look at your full income and it shouldn't be more than half of that.

[924] And, yeah, you know, you owe 16 ,000, but there's, that's a rule.

[925] thumb which means there's more other there's other things that play into that listen you can do what you want on this but if the goal is to get out of debt quickly so you can start investing again then yeah i would sell it yeah yeah that's definitely a goal what's that truck what's that truck do for you it doesn't do anything that's the other half it says it does it does dude i've got it i've got an old beat up truck and i would love a new one you know why because it made me it it kind of makes you feel awesome, doesn't it?

[926] Okay, it does.

[927] It does.

[928] It does.

[929] It's kind of awesome, right?

[930] And so it gives you, like, you feel a little bit cool on those Los Angeles streets when you're sitting there parked for four hours a day on the highway, and you're just staring at the people below you.

[931] It kind of feels awesome.

[932] Yeah.

[933] And so you have to be honest about what you're giving up, and you're giving up that.

[934] You have a great truck, it's worth a whole bunch of money, and you're going to give all that up for freedom.

[935] Because if you don't, if you're not honest about that, you get rid of the truck and that haunting feeling.

[936] I just gave up something that makes your ego feel good and you're going to try to make your ego feel better in other ways.

[937] So you're going to start just chasing.

[938] You're going to play whackamol with it.

[939] If you just go right through the middle of it and say, yeah, it's cool to have a rad truck.

[940] It really is.

[941] And I'm going to sell it because it's even cooler to have peace and freedom.

[942] So I'm going to buy a used corolla and just straight roll the streets of Los Angeles, California, my corolla.

[943] And everybody's going to back, Jesse, we know what you make.

[944] Jesse, why are you driving a corolla?

[945] You say, because I'm free.

[946] You see what I'm saying?

[947] Yeah, I do.

[948] You got kids?

[949] Yeah, I don't.

[950] Okay.

[951] I do have a, not a corolla, but a Nissan, which is equivalent to the Corolla.

[952] Done.

[953] Is that paid for?

[954] Is the Nissan paid for?

[955] Listen.

[956] Dude, that truck, bye Felicia.

[957] Sell this weekend.

[958] I'm on it.

[959] All right.

[960] I've already been getting appraisals and, that was like I nods and I was like I'm going to call me to call and you guys just pushing over I'm proud of you man I'm proud of you I'm proud of you and you're talking to two people who love our lives who make good money because our boss is overly generous with us and we all drive older cars because seriously nobody cares no one cares they really don't nobody cares I appreciate you guys everything you guys do you guys are awesome I appreciate you man I appreciate you congratulations dude you're about to be free here anytime soon man All right, let's roll out to Philadelphia.

[961] We were born and raised on the playground where we spent most of our days and talked to Brandon.

[962] Hey, Brandon, what's up?

[963] Hey, how's it going?

[964] Good, man. What's up?

[965] So I am 27 years old.

[966] I started my company and bought my home when I was 21.

[967] I'm currently making about $250 ,000 a year, shooting for $300.

[968] I'm the only employee of my own business.

[969] I was able to save up.

[970] $150 ,000, and I have that sitting in a money market mutual funds collecting 4 .2 % interest right now.

[971] Nice.

[972] So I have about $35 ,000 in debt outside of my home, which I'm definitely paying that off.

[973] I was going to do that today, actually.

[974] Nice.

[975] And then I have about $125 ,000 that I owe my home.

[976] Now, my question is, because my home is my home is locked in at $3 .2 .2.

[977] percent interest.

[978] I'm making more interest having it sit in a money market.

[979] And I also get that home as a business right off.

[980] Does it make sense for me to pay it off?

[981] In our world, it does.

[982] In your world, if you're very, very concerned with the math, it may not.

[983] Have you ever lived in a debt -free a paid -off house?

[984] No. So having been on both sides of that ledger, I'm going to tell you the sole tax that you're paying, you don't even know that you're paying it.

[985] Because here's what you can do.

[986] If you pay it off and you don't like that, you can go down and take a HELOC out on it and invest that money.

[987] And get the 4 .2.

[988] Yeah.

[989] See what I'm saying?

[990] And I don't think you will.

[991] I think if you pay that off, you're going to go, this is awesome.

[992] No way in the world would I take out a HELOC for 150 so I can get 4 .2 % on it.

[993] Because you don't know what your body is carrying around being a sole provider of the only employee at a business that you are crushing it on, but that your amygdala knows at any day, if I lose two of these clients or three of these clients, they take my house for me. Yeah, that's why I, you know, I live pretty frugally.

[994] I live as if my worst months, basically.

[995] Okay, well, if I do lose an account or two.

[996] Take it off the table.

[997] Yeah.

[998] They can't take your home.

[999] They can't take anything.

[1000] And they know what you're going to do?

[1001] You're going to be a lot more selective about the clients you choose.

[1002] And those clients are going to make you a lot more money down the road.

[1003] And you're going to serve a lot more people down the road.

[1004] Yeah.

[1005] Is that fair?

[1006] Yes.

[1007] I mean, you're talking about two percentage points, right?

[1008] Basically, give or take?

[1009] Mm -hmm.

[1010] Bro, I'd pay that thing off today.

[1011] You can be debt -free by the end of the afternoon.

[1012] Instantly.

[1013] Yeah.

[1014] I'm excited for you.

[1015] Does that sound crazy?

[1016] Yeah.

[1017] For 27, I think it sounds good.

[1018] I think it's pretty dat -go.

[1019] You can be 27 years old, pay it off house, making $200 grand a year in your own business.

[1020] Living is life like it's golden.

[1021] You have won, my good man. Pay it off today.

[1022] You're debt -free today.

[1023] Congratulations, man. This is your freedom dance.

[1024] This is The Ramsey Show.

[1025] We'll be right back.

[1026] Welcome back.

[1027] This is the Ramsey Show.

[1028] I'm John Deloney joined by Jade Warshall, AAA 825, 5 -2 -25.

[1029] Let's go out to St. Louis, Missouri, and talk to Jen.

[1030] Hey, Jen, Jen, what's going on?

[1031] Hi, I'm good.

[1032] John, how are you?

[1033] Good, good, good.

[1034] What's up?

[1035] So I'm going to be straightforward.

[1036] The question is my boyfriend doesn't want to get married.

[1037] Should I move out?

[1038] How long have you been together?

[1039] We've been together since the end of 2019.

[1040] A little background.

[1041] I'm a single mom at two.

[1042] I've got a boy -year -old turning five, seven -year -old turning eight.

[1043] We moved in late 2020 after you're dating.

[1044] I'm divorced from their dad, separated.

[1045] when my daughter was like four months old.

[1046] So it was a pretty overwhelming decision to move in together, you know, just protective over them trying to make the right decisions.

[1047] But I'd hope that, you know, things would progress to marriage by now.

[1048] You know, you hear Papa Dave, I just started listening to the show when we moved in together, say, you know, you don't want the arguments over the mustard end.

[1049] Now here we are.

[1050] So it's a topic about marriage and commitment.

[1051] So it's, you know, just feels.

[1052] hard to know what to do you next.

[1053] I've done this long enough that I think I'm right, but I'm also humble enough to know if I'm wrong, okay?

[1054] So I want you to shoot me straight, okay?

[1055] Yeah.

[1056] I can tell by your voice that you know the answer, and it doesn't really matter what Jade and I say.

[1057] I think he's been pretty clear.

[1058] He doesn't see a future with you, and he's going to ride the train as long as it will be, and you're terrified of being a single mom again.

[1059] and it's yeah i mean is that fair um i think it's fair he'll say like he just doesn't see me rush for it what's the push of course it is he's content and if i push forward on prioritizing that over relationship with him hold on that's that's just that's gaslight 101 because when you love somebody and they look you in the eye and say i feel unsafe and you love them you do whatever you got to do to help them feel safe and you told them that And then he says, you're prioritizing how you feel over how I feel.

[1060] And that's not what love does.

[1061] Love takes a knee and says, I got you.

[1062] And you hope that that person does the same for you.

[1063] But he's playing you like a fiddle.

[1064] But here's the thing.

[1065] Here's the thing.

[1066] You know that.

[1067] Why don't you trust yourself?

[1068] That is a good question.

[1069] This isn't the only place he does that to you, is it?

[1070] I'm not sure.

[1071] but it's just I mean he's in a journal and that means yes you don't have to talk about on there I get it I'm never going to tell somebody to move out I'm not going to do that you have to own that decision but I'm telling you if you were my sister if you were my daughter I would tell you to run and by the way that's a great way to think about it you've got kids what would you tell your kids to do yeah I've brought that up and he kind of spins it from the other point of view and like well you'd never force your son to marry someone and I'm like well no but I question like why this is going on.

[1072] What's the opposition to being married?

[1073] I'm not sure.

[1074] It's hard.

[1075] I mean, how do you come from a, you know, a broken home or something?

[1076] It would make sense to me. I had parents divorced myself, but, you know, I'm not sure other than it's a commitment and you're locked into it with someone.

[1077] Is it the kids?

[1078] Let's just be honest here.

[1079] Is he afraid of like having to be dad?

[1080] I'm not sure.

[1081] You know, obviously they're already kind of playing that role right now and has kids of his own.

[1082] They're all pretty well bonded together, and everyone gets fairly well.

[1083] I mean, as much as you can expect in a family situation.

[1084] See, I don't buy that either because I know some just staggeringly amazing dads who came along.

[1085] And it's not just as good as you can imagine.

[1086] Because you can expect, no, it's pretty amazing.

[1087] I'm thinking of my buddy Barrett who stepped into a messy situation has become the, the most amazing father to three wonderful kids.

[1088] And so I know it can be done because I've seen it done over and over and over again.

[1089] But it takes somebody walking in saying, come hell or high water, you are my wife, these are my kids and I'm all in.

[1090] Not, are you kidding me?

[1091] You're going to rush me?

[1092] Jeez.

[1093] It's been five years.

[1094] It's been five years.

[1095] Half a decade.

[1096] And you know what I mean?

[1097] Yeah.

[1098] And here's the thing.

[1099] Do you know all the things Jade and I are saying?

[1100] You know it.

[1101] What happened in your first marriage?

[1102] A lot of lying and, you know, I'd question things and I told I was wrong and eventually an affair that we worked through and then an affair that just kind of torn apart.

[1103] Okay.

[1104] And who growing up told you that what you thought didn't really matter too much?

[1105] Oh, I mean, probably both parents' children.

[1106] or do you've seen and not heard.

[1107] Okay.

[1108] And so I want to honor your nervous system right now.

[1109] Your body has learned over the course of your entire life that what you think, what you feel, what you know to be true is probably wrong and you just shut your mouth and be quiet about it.

[1110] And I want you to hear Jaden and I say you are free from that from this point forward because it's not true.

[1111] Yeah.

[1112] Being seen and not heard kept you safe as a kid and it's crushing you as an adult woman, right?

[1113] Yeah.

[1114] Okay.

[1115] Those things that keep us, safe as kids often ruin our adult relationships.

[1116] And so you learn as a kid, be seen, just be quiet and be out of the way.

[1117] Your kids don't deserve that in their mom.

[1118] You don't deserve that day to day.

[1119] And if you're with somebody that's requesting that of you, then, yeah, think long and hard about the duration of that relationship.

[1120] No question about it.

[1121] For sure.

[1122] It's hard to see the path forward, though, because, you know, there's not one.

[1123] He told you there's not one.

[1124] He said everything's great.

[1125] And by the way, from his perspective, it is.

[1126] He has a place to live.

[1127] He's got somebody sharing a bed with him.

[1128] I mean, he's got everything.

[1129] Why in the world would he change?

[1130] He gets his way all the time.

[1131] Yeah.

[1132] And whenever you're like, hey, I think this, he's like, well, that's dumb.

[1133] What about me?

[1134] And you're like, yeah, you're right, sorry.

[1135] Yeah.

[1136] He has no reason to change.

[1137] None.

[1138] And the only reason, only way he will change is if you say, I'm going to look in the mirror and believe for the first time of my life, I'm worth more than this.

[1139] And I'm worth somebody looking at me and saying, till death, do us part, I'm with you.

[1140] If you had to give your best guess, because you know this guy, and if you said, hey, if we're not getting married anytime soon, I'm walking.

[1141] Is he begging you to stay, or is he saying, don't let the door hit you on the way out?

[1142] No, he's pretty much like, well, that's your decision.

[1143] If you chose to leave, that's on you, and I can't stop you, you know, somebody who really loved him wouldn't choose to kind of walk out the vibes they get.

[1144] As the great Jay -Z once said, you need to dust your shoulders off or brush your shoulders off.

[1145] Get that dirt off your shoulder, yes.

[1146] Bye, Felicia.

[1147] You're going.

[1148] Yeah.

[1149] He told you that.

[1150] Yeah, he said, if you leave, I don't care.

[1151] I'm so, hey, forget him.

[1152] He's not on the phone with me. Jen, why?

[1153] I mean, it's scary out there.

[1154] It's financially scary.

[1155] There you go.

[1156] It's hard to, you know, have two kids alone.

[1157] and anytime something comes up, carry that weight on your shoulders.

[1158] Yeah.

[1159] Now we're getting into real talk.

[1160] Yeah.

[1161] The idea of being a single mom and going to one -bedroom apartment and sharing it with two kids is terrifying, right?

[1162] Yeah, for sure.

[1163] What do you make?

[1164] I make decent income after taxed biweekly.

[1165] I have this prepared about $2 ,500, but it's bi -weekly, so there's two that are a little higher than that, and their dad does actively pay child support.

[1166] And what does he pay for the child support?

[1167] It's 400 bi -weekly.

[1168] Okay.

[1169] So you're like almost $6 ,000 a month?

[1170] Yeah, yeah.

[1171] Okay.

[1172] A little more than I think.

[1173] Okay.

[1174] You can find a place to live for that.

[1175] Yeah.

[1176] I don't know.

[1177] Like COVID and everything, it just scares you because, like, employers and the furloughs and everything, so you never know what's going to come.

[1178] Day by day.

[1179] But you do know what's true right now and what's true right now.

[1180] is you have somebody that doesn't respect you and doesn't care about what you think or feel.

[1181] Yeah.

[1182] You know that to be true today.

[1183] Yeah.

[1184] Do you owe a lot of money?

[1185] Are you pretty good financially right now?

[1186] Pretty good.

[1187] Debt for you last summer.

[1188] No student loans, no credit cards, and paid off my car.

[1189] So I've been working on the emergency fund, and so now it's kind of just like in my baby step 3D or baby step 4.

[1190] There you go.

[1191] Well, you're doing all the right things.

[1192] And we're so proud of you.

[1193] the line.

[1194] I'm going to send you a copy of building a non -anxious life and own your past, change your future.

[1195] Be my gift to you.

[1196] When she does this, it's going to make a great statement to her kids about what is and is not acceptable.

[1197] And that's what's really great about this.

[1198] And it's scary every step of the way.

[1199] Call anytime, Jen.

[1200] We believe in you.

[1201] We believe in you.

[1202] You're worth being well.

[1203] This is the Ramsey Show.

[1204] What's going on?

[1205] What's going on?

[1206] This is John with my good friend Jade Warshaw and this is the Ramsey show live from Nashville, Tennessee, where we help people with their money, with their relationships, and with their work.

[1207] AAA 825 -5 -2 -2 -25.

[1208] We're taking your calls on just about anything you got going on.

[1209] We have experience.

[1210] Already got us got our own opinions.

[1211] And that might be about worth what you're going to pay for.

[1212] But we'll give it to you anyway.

[1213] AAA -825 -5 -2 -25.

[1214] Let's roll out to Seattle, Washington, and talk to well, well, well, my Michelle.

[1215] Hey, Michelle, what's up?

[1216] Hey, you guys, I love it.

[1217] This is so fun.

[1218] So I guess I'll just start with my question, and then we can just unpack from there.

[1219] So I just need help.

[1220] My husband and I are navigating the decision.

[1221] My mother -in -law has approached us and his brother wanting monthly financial help so that she can live a little bit easier at 75.

[1222] Okay, wanting or needing?

[1223] I would say it's a want.

[1224] What does she want?

[1225] She's struggling just to make ends meet.

[1226] She's making it meet, but she's not able to, I would say, live comfortably.

[1227] And I think she wants to be able to maybe work a little bit less and just enjoy life at ease versus living paycheck to paycheck.

[1228] How much money is she wanting from you guys collectively?

[1229] So her biggest wish in the world would be to have her mortgage paid off.

[1230] Mine too.

[1231] Okay.

[1232] Thank you.

[1233] Same.

[1234] Me too.

[1235] So she's got a couple hundred thousand dollars balance.

[1236] And so anywhere from, you know, $1 ,600 to $2 ,000 a month between the, two brothers so we would be pitching in somewhere between 800 to a thousand a month towards her lifestyle my oh my oh my so what if she sold her house and moved into an apartment so that's where i'm kind of questioning um so we have asked her and she's completely against it because she won't be as comfortable um well there's that and then there's also um you know that's where Her and her husband moved to, and about 15 plus years ago, she lost her husband to cancer, my husband's dad.

[1237] And so there's a lot of just sentimental, and that's what's holding her there.

[1238] And her house is worth quite a nice chunk of change, which would change her life.

[1239] Yeah.

[1240] What's it worth, by the way?

[1241] On the low end, I would say 1 .5 now.

[1242] Okay.

[1243] So I just want to get full clarity.

[1244] You said that she's making ends meet, but she might.

[1245] might not have the money to do extra special things.

[1246] Right.

[1247] So she can...

[1248] It's hard for her to, you know, go out to a nice dinner or...

[1249] Is it a nice dinner like a steak dinner or she can't get Chick -fil -A?

[1250] Oh, no. She can get Chick -fil -A.

[1251] It's, you know, nice things.

[1252] And she's just getting tired.

[1253] Oh.

[1254] Listen, I've...

[1255] Michelle, talk to John for a minute because I got to sit over here and be quiet.

[1256] And I have a heart to help.

[1257] I want to help everybody in the world.

[1258] Hey, listen, I want to honor family and I am taking steps right now to be able to take care of my mom and dad if and when that day comes.

[1259] I totally get it, okay?

[1260] And there's also, I'm sitting in a $1 .5 million house.

[1261] I make enough money to do whatever I want to do, but I kind of want to do more of what I want to do in less of living in reality.

[1262] And so this isn't about taking care of mom.

[1263] This is about mom having, wanting her cake and wanting to eat it too.

[1264] Right.

[1265] Right.

[1266] And she approaches us as, well, this is an investment for you.

[1267] This is going to be your inheritance.

[1268] Ooh.

[1269] And I'm over here like, well, I ain't guaranteed nothing.

[1270] If you live for 20 years, then you might need medical help or care or assisted living in the future.

[1271] That's right.

[1272] That's where that's going to come from.

[1273] And that's also hanging something over your head that you never asked for.

[1274] You're like, I never asked for you to leave me anything in your will.

[1275] right totally yeah and by the way it's not an investment paying for dinners and meals is not an investment no um yeah this is this is a hard one and here's it's going to be hard on two fronts it's going to be hard one because one of your either your husband or his brother's going to cave and so it's going to this kind of request from a parent is so selfish because it will split the family it is not selfish if if parent can't eat it is not selfish if parent doesn't have a place to live.

[1276] I'm all about that.

[1277] Right.

[1278] This is, I'm sitting on my $1 .5 million house.

[1279] And I can continue to say it's sentimental, even though a husband passed away 15 years ago.

[1280] But this is more about, I'm in a 1 .5 million.

[1281] I'm going to, this is my lifestyle, right?

[1282] Hey, what's your husband want to do?

[1283] He's, he's up in the air, but he's, you know, he's understanding the reality of the situation of, you know, she's not, you know, up a creek.

[1284] She's got away, through this and she doesn't have a way through it she's got a yacht through it it's not like she has like a like a canoe that she's trying to paddle up a river she can she could take a yacht do you have 1 .3 million dollars i mean we we've done pretty well i mean i i think our net worth is somewhere just just under two million okay um and we're new to this program and to be honest with you money has been the biggest stress in my part of the marriage because I held on to it.

[1285] And until I found your show, I started opening up to my husband about what this burden and stress was.

[1286] And, you know, when we're making decent money and, you know, we don't have money one month.

[1287] I'm just like, how is this happening?

[1288] So we're both on board.

[1289] We're brand new to this thing.

[1290] We're trying to shuffle our life around to, like, fit into the baby steps so we can actually have a goal to retire and have something on the horizon that's a pin in it.

[1291] It's not like a fantasy or a dream.

[1292] You have, you said you have a net worth of $2 million, but what's your net liability against that net worth?

[1293] How much debt do you have?

[1294] Yeah, so I've got $2 .90 on one of my mortgages and that we owned outright the other property, and then about $60K in consumer.

[1295] Okay.

[1296] And then do you have money laying around, obviously because you've got two million.

[1297] So what's in, what's liquid that you can get to?

[1298] Like what do you?

[1299] Okay.

[1300] So that's a little bit sticky because I just recently closed out my late mom's estate.

[1301] And so I got a modest inheritance that is not included in that 1 .8.

[1302] And that's just kind of sitting in a money market because I'm still emotional right now.

[1303] So that's, uh, about 260 is liquid.

[1304] Okay, 260's liquid.

[1305] So you guys are really close to being able to really pay off your debt, all of your debt, and this other mortgage, and be completely scot -free, basically.

[1306] Yes.

[1307] So with, yeah, crunching numbers in the next, you know, a handful of years, it'll be completely steamroll.

[1308] But consumer debt, yes, this year, 2024, we'll never touch consumer debt again.

[1309] Yeah, I mean, you've got 260 sitting in a...

[1310] Yeah, can you pay it off right now, like today?

[1311] I know.

[1312] Yeah, I can.

[1313] Yeah.

[1314] And then that leaves two.

[1315] 200 and I know you've got money elsewhere too, but not to get into all that, but then you only owe $290 on this other mortgage and it's your second home.

[1316] So there's money to make this happen.

[1317] You got to get with your husband and decide what you want to do, what you don't want to do, but here's the thing.

[1318] You're not doing anything out of guilt and you're also not going to do.

[1319] What is it, the guilt and resentment thing, George?

[1320] Yeah, choose guilt over resentment every time because if you start giving money, you're going to start getting frustrated and you're going to have a month where things are tight.

[1321] and she's going to be calling you from the Steakhouse, and you're going to start to resent her, and that's not fair to her.

[1322] What's fair to her is you and your family, and hopefully your brother's family, have boundaries.

[1323] This is the Ramsey Show, AAA 825, 5 -2 -25.

[1324] I'm John Deloney, joined by Jade Warshaw.

[1325] Jade, that last caller, and that got us buzzing in the hallway, man. That was different, John.

[1326] So, I don't want to talk to the sweet woman who called, because she's kind of like second removed, right?

[1327] This is her husband's mom, so mother -in -law.

[1328] I guess the conversation I want to have is to parents out there.

[1329] Yes.

[1330] Those who would look at their children as a ROI, you owe me, or as a lottery ticket or as a lifestyle play for me. Yeah.

[1331] Instead of saying, I got to the end of my life, me and my husband built this world or me and my wife built this world, we have a $1 .5 million house we're referring to the previous call we did it and God now we can sell this house we can buy a $500 ,000 condo and put a million dollars in the bank to take care of me as a widow for the rest of my life that's one of the joys of real estate it's a way to build wealth for just this moment yeah instead of saying hey you know what I'm kind of getting tired of working how about everybody give me a thousand dollars a month so I can stay in this million dollar plus property and continue to go out to fancy dinners and to do what I want to do.

[1332] In many ways, if we're just looking at it dollar for dollar, in many ways, it's the same as if she had $1 .5 million in a retirement account and was like, I don't really want to touch this.

[1333] I don't want to take a draw off it.

[1334] All my kids, y 'all are doing good.

[1335] So everybody send me a check.

[1336] Yeah, the money's the money.

[1337] Whether it's in a home or sitting in an account, it's just she don't want to get to it.

[1338] For sentimental reasons or whatever, it's like, hey, this is still real money and real wealth that you have here.

[1339] you just don't want to access it.

[1340] And so it's at everybody else's expense.

[1341] And so.

[1342] And I guess the flip side of that is there's got to be something else in a relationship like this.

[1343] Because I want my mom to have the best.

[1344] And I want my dad to be the best.

[1345] And so there has to be something along the way in this family dynamic that people aren't running to take care of the situation.

[1346] Right.

[1347] Well, I don't think anything's on fire.

[1348] No, not only there's nothing on fire.

[1349] There's still, there's roses in these.

[1350] these gardens, right?

[1351] I mean, things are nice.

[1352] I mean, unless you have, you know, unless you have a terrible relationship with your parents, most kids want to help their parents out.

[1353] That's right.

[1354] Especially if they, even if they can't financially afford to do it, it's like, my mom needs them.

[1355] They'll put themselves in harm's way and put their financial family at risk to help their, you know.

[1356] So I don't think it's even a thing of like, oh, what kind of child are you?

[1357] It's, I think we want to help, but I think it's also, but you have money.

[1358] You have.

[1359] A million dollars, right?

[1360] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1361] So there's, you know, I, I asked John during the break, I'm like, am I some kind of Scrooge?

[1362] Like, am I crazy?

[1363] Because I was like not, not even having it.

[1364] No, and occasionally we have, I mean, today we've got a full studio audience.

[1365] And occasionally you look up and the whole audience is just.

[1366] Shake in their head.

[1367] What is happening right now?

[1368] And so, yeah, that's one of those rare moments.

[1369] I think everybody was like, is this for real?

[1370] And unfortunately, it is that folks want to prop up their life.

[1371] lifestyle.

[1372] They don't want to own reality.

[1373] Here's reality.

[1374] And this is the conversation.

[1375] That's why, you know, what we teach here day in and day out here is so important because you do have to think towards the future and you have to think, you know, there's going to come a time, you know, if you're listening and you have kids where the roles are going to be reversed and you're going to be, you know, the old parent.

[1376] And do you want to do the same, do you want to put your kids in the same position that you've been put in?

[1377] And that tracks on many layers here.

[1378] Like so many of us, I know my generation grew up where parents don't really talk about money and it's just like you don't ask us how much we make and we don't, you know.

[1379] They don't talk about money and they don't talk about sex.

[1380] Right.

[1381] Stuff just gets paid and y 'all just appeared in our home.

[1382] Right.

[1383] Let's stop talking.

[1384] And now we're in our 30s and 40s and 50s and it's like, my parents are they doing okay?

[1385] Are they not doing okay?

[1386] And we're wondering if we're going to have to take care of them.

[1387] And so it's like let's not do that to our kids.

[1388] Let's get our financial house in order and let's pay off our debt.

[1389] And for the love of God, let's please invest some.

[1390] money so that when your time comes because it will come nobody works forever that you know unless you leave out too soon you know the time is going to come where you can't work and are you going to do the same cycle again and now you're calling your kids and saying i raised you the least you could do is you know kicking some money for my chick fillet well let me promise you in this situation uh let me back up here's my promise if mom doesn't have a place to live dad doesn't have a place to live yes And you give them a place.

[1391] There's going to be some hanging your head a little bit low, but there's going to be some gratitude.

[1392] Absolutely.

[1393] Thank you.

[1394] In this situation, when needs are beyond met, when mom is a millionaire and she's calling for lifestyle stipends, that number will move for the rest of y 'all's life together.

[1395] That's a good word, John.

[1396] It will be $1 ,000, and then it will turn into $1 ,500 bucks, and it will be, I need a new car, and it will be a new roof, and it will be I need a new kitchen.

[1397] It will continue to move because it was never about the money.

[1398] it was about this external grasp for proved to me how much you love me and as soon as that's met that finish line continues to move and move and move and so drawing boundaries there is so hard so hard because she's going to make it y 'all's fault and you got to draw those boundaries choose guilt over resentment every single time that's right let's go out to Atlanta and talk to Stephanie hey Stephanie what's going on hey thank you so much for taking my call you got it what's going on Okay, so my husband and I are in Baby Step 3, and I need y 'all to please be on my side on this one.

[1399] All right, Team Stephanie, go.

[1400] Yes, okay, so our disagreement is on how much we should have in our emergency fund.

[1401] Okay.

[1402] And at the end of the day, by the time we do all of our expenses, it comes down to our food budget.

[1403] We agree on what our monthly budget is, but our situation, we're a little different compared to other people.

[1404] I guess you kind of put us in more of like homesteader prepper.

[1405] Okay.

[1406] You're talking my language.

[1407] Keep going.

[1408] Keep going.

[1409] You should see my deep freeze.

[1410] Let's go.

[1411] I got two of them.

[1412] So there you go.

[1413] So in my home, I have, depending on whether it's meat, grains, whatever, anywhere from nine months to a year's worth of food at all times and we rotate through it.

[1414] Okay.

[1415] He thinks in our emergency fund, we should not have any funds allocated for food because we have our food storage.

[1416] I disagree because even though our kids are fairly young, I've got two boys that are not teenagers yet, but they're starting to eat a lot.

[1417] Split the difference, Stephanie.

[1418] You guys are splitting hairs.

[1419] What's your food budget every month?

[1420] okay so i have a thousand a month okay so take 500 when you're when you're thinking about your budget because three to six months of expenses is basically your basic budget it's not your budget with all its bells and whistles so when you're calculating that number and saying okay what does it just take for our house to tick and run and run smoothly if we both lost our jobs then yeah when you're counting up that number instead of putting a thousand put 500 and call it a day what's wrong with that I agree with that.

[1421] He thinks there should be nothing, but I said it either needs to be half or the full.

[1422] All right.

[1423] So you're both kind of crazy.

[1424] You're both kind of crazy.

[1425] What's the, hey, legitimately, time -wise, what does this equate to savings?

[1426] Is this you say for an extra month?

[1427] I mean, what are we talking here?

[1428] So time -wise, if we split the dip in half, it's like an extra two months.

[1429] If not, it's an extra four months.

[1430] This is not worth your marriage.

[1431] it's not he's already married to somebody that needs a year's worth of cow and deer in the freezer let him have this one let him have this I mean what I mean at the end of the day what I mean what's it worth uh no it's just making sure on the same page and actually if you really want to know he was the one that was like you need to call in and ask them or you could throw a wrench in the plan and say listen if we don't save this up what if like we've used to our last month of savings and the electricity goes out and all of our deer in antelope that's in the deep freezer goes bad.

[1432] We're going to wish that we had saved up that grocery money.

[1433] Hey, here's the thing.

[1434] That's like my biggest fear is like the freezers are going to like.

[1435] Most people who are like, I'm prepping for the end of time.

[1436] I got a year's worth of cow in the freezer.

[1437] Dude, they cut the power.

[1438] That's the first thing that happens.

[1439] And every time I mention that, people are like, wait, wait, wait, what?

[1440] The first thing they do is cut the power.

[1441] You lose all of it.

[1442] So, I mean, you need a root seller.

[1443] That's what you need.

[1444] You need to be vegetarian, like Jade, because you don't have to deal with all this chaos.

[1445] But I do have a couple of deep freezers, and I'm with you, Stephanie.

[1446] But split the difference.

[1447] I mean, you're talking, you're stepping over $100 bills to pick up nickels when it comes to your marriage.

[1448] It's not worth the fight.

[1449] Let's just split it half and half.

[1450] Both of you are nuts and y 'all can find peace on the other end.

[1451] That was awesome.

[1452] You're awesome, Stephanie.

[1453] We'll be right back.

[1454] This is The Ramsey Show.

[1455] I'm John Deloney, joined by Jade Warshaw.

[1456] Triple -8 -8 -8 -25 -5 -2 -25.

[1457] Let's talk about every dollar, the best budgeting app in the land, in the world, as some people might say, and I agree with that statement.

[1458] Because we are on Lord of the Rings.

[1459] That's right.

[1460] Every dollar.

[1461] Let's talk for real about this thing.

[1462] You need a budget, right?

[1463] And there's a lot of them out there, but they don't do what every dollar does, which is making it very easy to stick to your monthly budget and also providing the guidance you need, the Ramsey way so that you can stick to your budget and accomplish your goals.

[1464] That's what this whole thing is about.

[1465] And so the best way to make the most of your money is by creating this every dollar budget.

[1466] It truly does help you stick to your monthly budget.

[1467] It makes it so simple to plan your spending, to plan your paychecks.

[1468] You can track your expenses and you can save money for the things that matter most to you.

[1469] What I love about every dollar is it's an app on your phone or you can do it on your desktop.

[1470] And I always say, John, that every dollar fills in the communication with your spouse if you're married.

[1471] It's real tough.

[1472] It's like, yeah, I forgot to tell you I went to Publix.

[1473] But Sam can open up the budget and see, okay, somebody went to publics.

[1474] Usually it works like this.

[1475] Hey, John, you forgot to tell me that you went to Publix or a guitar center in my wife's guitar center.

[1476] Let's be real.

[1477] That's your reality, John.

[1478] But it's this app and you can open it up.

[1479] It's in real time.

[1480] You can see what's going on.

[1481] And it wants you to track your transactions every single day.

[1482] so you build up this daily habit to where every day you're just looking at your money, which is so good.

[1483] You keep a pulse on your spending and make progress towards your goals.

[1484] So if you're interested in that, download every dollar for free.

[1485] Again, that's for free.

[1486] You can do that in the app store or Google Play if you have an Android.

[1487] I don't know about the Android.

[1488] All right, andards are good.

[1489] Androids are good.

[1490] Are they?

[1491] Yes.

[1492] Look at Christian in there.

[1493] Christian in there.

[1494] Are you the only one Christian with an Android?

[1495] droid.

[1496] I am sorry for you.

[1497] I'm sorry.

[1498] Hey.

[1499] America, Christian.

[1500] That's what I'm talking about.

[1501] Let's go out to Dallas, D -Texis, and talk to Elizabeth.

[1502] Hey, Elizabeth, what's going on?

[1503] Oh, not much.

[1504] How are y 'all doing?

[1505] We're partying, dude.

[1506] That's not true.

[1507] We're at work, but you probably are, too.

[1508] What's up?

[1509] So my question is, I'm trying to figure out what the best way to get my family out of this hole is with an anticipated car accident settlement.

[1510] okay go for it um well there's kind of a little bit of a backstory so i'm i'm married but i've been single since january of 2023 um i have three kids um and i'm not getting any financial support whatsoever right now okay is a divorce in process just take him forever uh so he doesn't want to be with me but he doesn't want to get divorced i obviously want to because there's no points in the tie, but I can't afford to.

[1511] Here's the deal.

[1512] It's the opposite.

[1513] It's actually, he can go do a bunch of things that can destroy you.

[1514] Yes.

[1515] Yes.

[1516] That's a huge worry of mine.

[1517] Yes.

[1518] So when you say it's too expensive, is there not an attorney that you can pick up for five or ten grand?

[1519] I know that's a lot of money, but this is a, this is a scary position for you to be in.

[1520] I'm 100%.

[1521] There is, the only problem is, is I live kind of in a college town, so everybody wants, you know, five, four or five grand up front.

[1522] Okay.

[1523] And I have nothing, like, no money at all.

[1524] Okay.

[1525] And it's scary.

[1526] Because, you know, I'm expecting a car accident settlement, and I'm not divorced.

[1527] So that also scares me because I feel like he's going to try to get it away from me. Yes.

[1528] Is the car in your name, or is it both of your names?

[1529] no i i bought it before we got married okay so the car is 100 % in your name yes okay then the settlement should come to you you should be fine um okay so my uh what about lost wages because i i was out of work for six months because i dislocated my hips so i wasn't a lot of work at all okay is that is that coming to you uh they the attorneys have told me that i'm going to get lost wages so okay well then i would not hear i don't think if he tried to come after money.

[1530] I don't think there's any way he'd get it.

[1531] Elizabeth, I can hear you're scared to death and you are projecting problems into the future and you're worrying about them in the present, okay?

[1532] Yeah.

[1533] I would much rather, do you have an opportunity to go earn some money right now?

[1534] So I've been working.

[1535] Where are you working?

[1536] I'm self -employed as a contractor.

[1537] Doing what?

[1538] Construction remodeling, flooring, showers, are you making any money doing that currently no in the next couple weeks i'm anticipating the job is going to pay me you know for almost five grand except i'm also behind my rent elizabeth you have to stop this you got to go get a job at macdonalds and you got to get a job at walmart today i know you've got a lot of skills but you're drowning and you're scared to death and you got little kids and you got left and the guys drowning you on the other end of the teeter -totter because he knows you can't afford anything right this second yeah and you're spiraling and you're spiraling you've been spiraling for over a year now and the only path through this is through this and I'm only telling you that because I love you and you can make $20 an hour in Dallas, Texas at both of those locations um and then as far as the situation goes with not having a vehicle.

[1539] I mean, I have a vehicle, but it's technically totaled from the car accident.

[1540] Well, keep driving it.

[1541] I am.

[1542] I just, I can't afford to put fuel in it right now.

[1543] Because you have to get, you have to, you have to get around.

[1544] I know, you've got to go get a job.

[1545] You have to go work.

[1546] Yeah.

[1547] Do you have any buddies that for the first two weeks before you get a paycheck can just drop you off?

[1548] I really don't have any friends.

[1549] I had a friend, but she kind of just disappeared.

[1550] How are you feeding your children right now?

[1551] I get government assistance.

[1552] I get food stamps.

[1553] And I've gotten that ever since he moved out just because of not being able to do that, you know.

[1554] Yeah.

[1555] When is the check coming in?

[1556] I get a debit on the 12th of every month.

[1557] No, no, no. When is the check for the settlement come in?

[1558] Oh, it's supposed to be within the next 30 days.

[1559] Okay.

[1560] the biggest temptation you're going to have is to go blow every penny of that and what I want you here's a deal you're going to have a choice to make okay you're going to have a choice as to whether you go finance a new car whether you go get some nice apartment for a minute because it's going to be a big check or if you get a friend somebody you trust and if you don't have that then you go find a pastor at a local church or you call and find a counselor on government assistance for $50 an hour.

[1561] But you find somebody that will walk with you with this money.

[1562] And if you play your cards right, you're going to put this money in a high -yield savings account and you're going to get enough money to get an apartment or you're going to be able to pay on the current apartment you have and you're going to be able to put gas in your car, you're not going to go buy a new car, even though yours is ridiculous and it looks silly and it's been totaled, but it still drives.

[1563] And you're going to go get two jobs, and you're going to work, and you're going to work, and you're going to work.

[1564] And this breaks my heart for you.

[1565] But you can look up in nine months and have worked two jobs and kept this money in the bank, and you're going to have a radically different outlook on life.

[1566] And I want you to take $5 ,000 of this settlement, and I want you to get an attorney and get this divorce finalized.

[1567] Yeah.

[1568] Okay.

[1569] I agree with you.

[1570] I definitely agree.

[1571] I know it stinks.

[1572] And I know this is going to feel like a lifeline.

[1573] It's going to be like, oh, man, I've got it.

[1574] I'm made.

[1575] And it's going to go faster.

[1576] It's going to go right through your hands like water if you don't have a plan.

[1577] And the plan has to be your standard of living that you have right now goes up 1 % gasoline.

[1578] I'm not buying anything new.

[1579] I'm not buying new clothes.

[1580] I'm not buying gasoline and toothpaste and deodorant and soap.

[1581] And I'm going to pay rent.

[1582] And then I'm going to go get a. job and then I'm going to go to the next level and then the next level.

[1583] We're playing a two or three year game here.

[1584] Yeah.

[1585] That man left you in a bad hole, didn't he?

[1586] Yeah.

[1587] By the way, if you get it finalized, the court will make him pay you child support.

[1588] And I know single moms all across the state of Texas just laughed when I said that, but at least it will be court ordered, right?

[1589] Yeah.

[1590] I'm so sorry, hon. Hang on the line here.

[1591] Hang on the line here.

[1592] Hang on the line.

[1593] I'm going to hook you up with Financial Peace University with their course.

[1594] It's going to tell you how to handle this money when it comes to you.

[1595] And I'm going to hook you up with the every dollar app.

[1596] I know you don't have any money in the account right now, but in 30 days you're going to have a lot of money in that account, and I want you to steward it wisely.

[1597] Hang on the line.

[1598] We'll get you taken care of.

[1599] We'll be right back.

[1600] This is the Ramsey Show.

[1601] Today's scripture of the day is Isaiah 4817.

[1602] I'm the Lord your God who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you and the way you should go.

[1603] The great and mighty George Carlin says Some people see things that are and ask why And some people dream of things that never were and ask why not And some people have to go to work And they don't have time for all that I love George Carlin The goat All right let's go out to Minneapolis Not Minneapolis but Minneapolis Thank you John I've been working hard on that And talk to Patrick What's up Patrick?

[1604] Hey guys, how are you guys doing today?

[1605] We're rocking on to the break of dawn, brother.

[1606] What are you doing?

[1607] Good, good.

[1608] So, I just had a quick question for you guys.

[1609] So, I believe it was like a couple of years ago.

[1610] I was with my dad, and he had put me on all of, of a of uh of uh uh uh uh the credit cards uh had he had and um uh i i guess my question is uh how am i uh able to get myself so are you an authorized user on these credit cards oh yeah okay so yeah let's get off of those yeah for anybody listening if you're an authorized user on a credit card, all you have to do is call up the number because you've got your own card.

[1611] You can spend and it's affecting your credit.

[1612] All you have to do is call the number and say, I don't want to be an authorized user anymore.

[1613] And you have the ability to do that.

[1614] So it's literally that simple.

[1615] And I would do that.

[1616] Did he pull your, did he pull these credit cards in your name or are you on his credit card?

[1617] I am on his credit card.

[1618] Oh, okay.

[1619] That makes it easy.

[1620] That makes it easy.

[1621] and you can just roll that off.

[1622] Yep.

[1623] Just call them up and say, I'm an authorized user on this account and I don't want to be anymore.

[1624] Fantastic.

[1625] And that'll be that on that.

[1626] Yeah.

[1627] Good call, Patrick.

[1628] Hey, and good for you for getting off your dad's stuff, man. Let's separate this and be all growed up.

[1629] All right, let's go out to Kansas City, Missouri and talk to the mighty Bryce.

[1630] Hey, Bryce, what's up, ma 'am?

[1631] How's it going, guys?

[1632] Excellent.

[1633] What's up with you, ma 'am?

[1634] So I guess I have a question here.

[1635] I wanted you guys to slap some sense into me. So I'm thinking about buying a new car.

[1636] Just don't.

[1637] Just don't.

[1638] Just kidding.

[1639] Go ahead.

[1640] So it's a 22 BMW M340I, and cars is kind of my passion, but I just really wanted someone to talk me out of it, I guess.

[1641] I make about $80 ,000 a year.

[1642] I have about $3 ,000 in debt, and I wanted to put about $10 ,000 to $15 ,000.

[1643] down on the vehicle and then do payments for the rest uh correct yes that's a great idea i think you may you want us to talk you off the ledge is that what you're calling for so i guess i guess i just know that i could put that money somewhere else so i've got two roads to go down i really want this car it's my passion but i've got this other road where i know i could take that money and build my wealth instead of buying the car with it.

[1644] What do you think is the wise answer?

[1645] And what do you think that we're going to tell you to do?

[1646] So you're going to tell me to take the road to invest that money into something smarter.

[1647] Yeah, we're going to tell you, we want peace for you flat out.

[1648] We want you to have financial peace.

[1649] We want you to be able to leave an inheritance.

[1650] We want you to have a good life financially.

[1651] We don't want you to be slave to a lender.

[1652] I think, You know, even if you're, you know, relatively new to the show, I think you can kind of get that, even from listening to a couple hours of the show.

[1653] But, yeah, if I'm you, you've got $3 ,000 of debt to pay off.

[1654] And if you've got $10 ,000 to $15 ,000 to put down on this vehicle, you can pay off your debt.

[1655] And then with whatever you have left, which is at least $12 ,000, can't you buy a car in cash?

[1656] That would be so amazing to have a cash car, right?

[1657] Yes, I do have a car right now.

[1658] What do you have?

[1659] That is the debt.

[1660] That's the debt I have, actually.

[1661] $3 ,000 in debt.

[1662] So I have a 2014 Mercedes right now that I've had for about five years.

[1663] What's it worth?

[1664] It's worth about $13 ,000, $14 ,000.

[1665] So can't you sell that car and get $10 for it and then put your other 15 with it and buy a $25 ,000 car in cash?

[1666] So the idea was, so I have about $30 ,000 in the bank and I was going to take $10 out of that.

[1667] I was going to sell the car I have and use $10 from that and do possibly $20 ,000 down.

[1668] So $15 ,000 to $20 ,000.

[1669] Not down.

[1670] That's where we're differing.

[1671] You and I have two different schools of thought.

[1672] I don't want you to go into debt ever again.

[1673] Not for depreciating asset.

[1674] Yeah.

[1675] It's going down in value.

[1676] And the borrower is slave to the lender, period.

[1677] And if you want to talk about better things that you could be doing with your money, let's say the payments 500 bucks a month.

[1678] Do you know what that is over the course of time?

[1679] You're locking yourself into a life of car payments because you had a car payment before.

[1680] Now you're going to have a car payment again.

[1681] And before you look up, you will have had car payments for 20, 30, 40 years of your life.

[1682] And I don't have to tell you, if you plug that into an investment calculator, the millions of dollars that you're throwing down the drain.

[1683] And you don't even have to.

[1684] Like, some people get locked into car payments because they feel like they don't have the money sitting around to get out.

[1685] You've got $30 ,000 sitting around to never do this ever again.

[1686] Yes.

[1687] Tell me about this word you keep using, which is like, it's like a new.

[1688] fangled word that is super hemorrhoid inducing for me. Passion.

[1689] They're my passion.

[1690] Oh, they're my passion.

[1691] Tell me about this passion of yours.

[1692] So it's just, it's really the only thing in my life that I don't, that I absolutely love is cars.

[1693] I don't really, I mean, I'm 24 years old.

[1694] I've got a job.

[1695] I don't really have many hobbies.

[1696] I don't really play any video games.

[1697] I don't play any sports.

[1698] Cars is my thing.

[1699] And I know the number one thing that you guys talk about is to not have a car loan and to be paying $5 ,600 a month on a car.

[1700] That's why I'm second guessing myself.

[1701] And you should be.

[1702] Yeah, you should be.

[1703] Listen, I could tell you right now.

[1704] You want to know what my thing is?

[1705] What's that?

[1706] Million dollar houses.

[1707] Yes.

[1708] My things are guitar equipment.

[1709] You know?

[1710] I'm not even that good, but I just love buying it.

[1711] Trips to Europe, that's my thing.

[1712] Like, I think we all have a thing that's like, yeah, I would love that.

[1713] That would be great if I could do that all the time.

[1714] But there's a little thing called reality, and we should live there.

[1715] There's another word.

[1716] It's an ancient Greek word.

[1717] I think it's Greek and Latin and English at the same time.

[1718] And it's called maturity.

[1719] And it's called being able to separate, like, what I really want versus what is reality, what I have.

[1720] Yep.

[1721] And I know that if I don't end up getting this vehicle and I put this money somewhere smarter, my future self will thank me for that.

[1722] It will.

[1723] It sure will.

[1724] In the moment right now, I just, I don't know.

[1725] Listen.

[1726] Hey.

[1727] You do know.

[1728] You do know.

[1729] There's two types of dumb choices you can make.

[1730] There's the dumb choice where wise people have done it before and warned you.

[1731] and say, dude, if you do that, you'll die.

[1732] Like, don't do it.

[1733] I've done it before.

[1734] It's not good.

[1735] Right.

[1736] And you have the opportunity to learn from that dumb choice or do it anyway.

[1737] And then there's a dumb choice where you're like, is my first rodeo.

[1738] I don't know any better.

[1739] I thought I was doing right.

[1740] And it still turned out to be a decision that was dumb, right?

[1741] Don't make the first dumb choice.

[1742] We're telling you.

[1743] We're telling you.

[1744] Dude, if you do this, you'll die.

[1745] Like, don't do it.

[1746] Like, financially, it's not good for you.

[1747] John and I have both made, we've done everything stupid in the book when it comes to money.

[1748] and we're telling you, you are going to regret this and you're not going to die, but you're going to regret this.

[1749] Here's the other challenge.

[1750] And I'm not saying this to make fun, okay?

[1751] This is me being as honest as I can.

[1752] I want you to challenge yourself to get more hobbies, to get some guys to hang out with, to start doing some other things.

[1753] Because if you notice, Jade and I both rattled off multiple things that if we were just given the Wild West worth of money, we would go spend stuff on because we have multiple passions across multiple different things.

[1754] And that's just the idea of a well -rounded person.

[1755] If you find yourself at 24 and you are fixated on a thing so much so that you're going to act on it against your best interest, that's called an addiction.

[1756] Okay?

[1757] So I want you to begin to expand your horizon.

[1758] Go to races, that's all cool.

[1759] But also go to comedy shows.

[1760] Go watch movies.

[1761] Get some guys and go bowling.

[1762] Learn how to fish.

[1763] Do some other things that don't have such a multi -thousousand -thousand -thous -dollar entry point into finding joy.

[1764] And the things you get good at, the things you're going to get passionate about over time.

[1765] Go practice some other things, man. And thanks for letting us pick on you, Bryce.

[1766] We love you, dude.

[1767] And that's a great car.

[1768] You just can't afford it.

[1769] Hey, thanks for listening to us, America.

[1770] This has been The Ramsey Show.

[1771] Hey, guys, I'm Rachel.

[1772] And I'm George.

[1773] And you've probably heard our voices before on The Ramsey Show.

[1774] And do we have a surprise for you?

[1775] Yep.

[1776] We have our very own show, Smart Money Happy Hour, where we talk about pop culture, current events, and of course, money.

[1777] George, it's a great show.

[1778] And what else do we talk about?

[1779] So much, Rachel.

[1780] Not enough and yet too much.

[1781] We talk about guilt tipping because tipping is out of control and I won't stand for it anymore, which is why I'm sitting.

[1782] I'm glad you're taking such a stand.

[1783] And we also talk about something else I'm passionate about Disney adults.

[1784] Why is it a thing?

[1785] Listen, some adults still find the magic.

[1786] Sure.

[1787] We also talk about toxic money traits and girl math.

[1788] And if you don't know what those are, you have to listen to the podcast.

[1789] Yeah, there's a lot there, you guys.

[1790] It's pretty fun.

[1791] We keep you relevant, is what I'm trying to say.

[1792] We help you out.

[1793] So pull up a chair to the happy hour you wish your friends we're having we promise you won't regret it and if you don't have friends we'll be your friends we will we're great friends so make sure to check it out on apple spotify youtube or the ramsie network app