The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz XX
[0] You're listening to Draft King's Network.
[1] As we sat down here to record Mystery Crate today, Izzy said one of the most obnoxious things I've ever heard anyone say to me. I have a tendency to do that around here.
[2] He was like, man, I did the show today, and I'm looking around at everybody, and I'm too skinny.
[3] That's not what I said.
[4] What a jerk.
[5] Seriously.
[6] What a jerk, man. Last few times I've done the show, I've been looking up at the camera, and I've said, man, I've got to put on some weight.
[7] I took that as you looked around at all of us, and you were like, different, different sentence.
[8] You look to the right at me in that chair and you're like, oh, man, I'm skinny.
[9] No. It's obnoxious, dude.
[10] I'm kidding.
[11] I don't even like skinny.
[12] I think skinny can be ugly.
[13] You are skinny.
[14] You've gone vegan.
[15] Is that why you've gotten skinny?
[16] Are you working out as much as you used to?
[17] Yeah, I think it's just, in theory.
[18] I mean, I just probably not as much protein as I used to, because it's a little harder to find.
[19] And I don't know if this could be true or not, but it feels like it's just like a bunch of animal nonsense waste just left my body because I still work out the same amount I still eat in terms of the amounts roughly the same Maybe stop cutting as many can maybe work out less I know that doesn't make sense for most people But you're doing mostly weight training right Mostly I'm not doing a bunch of cardio Yeah but yeah weight training isn't really like a high calorie thing Like you're not burning a lot of calories So I think it's probably just your Are you like now I do get antsy a little bit And if I haven't done cardio in a while Like I'll go three or four miles And then during football season Flag football season I'm running around like crazy.
[20] So I'd get my cardio and so I probably have to do extra just to eat more.
[21] You think you could go vegan for a week dad?
[22] For a week?
[23] Yeah.
[24] Yeah.
[25] That's about it though.
[26] Yeah.
[27] If I was your personal chef you could do it for at least a month.
[28] Guaranteed.
[29] Well, I've never developed a taste for the plant -based fake meat.
[30] What if you try it though?
[31] I think you're doing that thing that Dan accused you of earlier in the week on the show where you're critic, like I'm not going to criticize it because I haven't really tried any of that stuff.
[32] I think the one, I think I had a vegan, the burger.
[33] Like, I think that's all I've ever done.
[34] That's what Greg was talking about is like the fake meat, right?
[35] The process, that's not, I don't eat that anymore.
[36] The first time I went vegan had way too many of those because it was too easy.
[37] And I would just, you know, have it for dinner and be like, okay, we're just eating plant -based burgers.
[38] But now I have my niece meal prep for us every week.
[39] And I pay her.
[40] And then, yeah, so we've got good food for the week.
[41] And none of that fake meat stuff, it's actual food.
[42] I've never had a vegan burger, so I'm not going to say, ah, that tastes like shit.
[43] I don't know.
[44] I just, I have a metal block against it.
[45] You think it would taste like shit.
[46] Like if I want a burger, I might have a burger.
[47] You know, I don't want to have a fake burger that's trying to fool me into it being a burger.
[48] When they had the Impossible Whopper at Burger King, I had a good amount of them, and they taste kind of the same.
[49] Did they always come with cheese and mayo?
[50] No, that's how they mask it.
[51] Because, like, after a while, it just all tastes like a combination of mayo and lettuce.
[52] Greg, I'm going to make you a hot dog that is made entirely out of a carrot, and you are going to love it.
[53] Out of a carrot?
[54] A carrot?
[55] Isn't that just a carrot?
[56] Yeah, but it's a carrot dog, so it's a flavor of a hot dog.
[57] A carrot dog.
[58] Okay.
[59] What do you put on that thing to make it hot dog flavored?
[60] Well, you just kind of shape it into as much as you can, the shape of a hot dog, and then you basically, it's a boil or broil, but in this liquid, and this liquid is a combination of, like, soy sauce, ketchup, ketchup, liquid smoke, a bunch of other stuff.
[61] I'm listening, there?
[62] And then you just let it sit in there until it gets, like, fork tender and let it sit there for another 20 minutes.
[63] I happen to make a vegan slaw with it, and you put it all together.
[64] But you don't even need the slaw.
[65] Like, you did it with ketchup and mustard.
[66] It tastes like a regular hot.
[67] I'm not going to lie.
[68] I'm kind of in on this.
[69] I would sample that.
[70] I like carrot.
[71] You don't even have to wait for me to make it for you if you want.
[72] The next, if they still have them, this vendor here, the first time I ever tried these was at a Miami Heat Game.
[73] I asked him out for a vegan vendor.
[74] There was one.
[75] He had vegan casidias or he had vegan hot dog.
[76] and I picked the vegan hot dog and I asked him three times I was like, are you sure this is vegan?
[77] He's like, dude, it's a carrot and I was like, what?
[78] And yeah, he showed me what he did and I was like, I'm going to have to mimic that.
[79] I think the key for me would be that you cook the carrot just enough where it has the mouth feel, the consistency of a hot dog.
[80] That's for most people.
[81] And then you get the flavor and then boot.
[82] In Atlanta, we got something called slutty vegan and I promise you you eat some of those burgers.
[83] You would think you're eating the real deal, Daddy.
[84] And also some chicken patties I got at the house.
[85] I got this from your local grocers, the Morning Star, Spicy Vegan Paddies.
[86] Those are good?
[87] I promise to God.
[88] Wow.
[89] Try them out.
[90] I'm always afraid of the vegan chicken.
[91] And I think it's just because they put a little apostrophe in it.
[92] And it's like, C -H -I -C -A -Postrophe in.
[93] And I'm just like, I don't know, that apostrophe is, like, doing a lot of work.
[94] Are you full vegan?
[95] No. I was going to say, absolutely.
[96] I was going to say, I think you throw it down.
[97] People should try it.
[98] I mean, if you've ever been, like, if you ever been to a planta, Queen.
[99] I think they have a few of those across the country.
[100] I think there's two of them here.
[101] There's one here, yeah.
[102] Yeah.
[103] It's just, like, really good.
[104] Like, the idea that you, it's a struggle to make good plant -based foods.
[105] It's expensive, though, right?
[106] There's so much, no. It's just not really expensive.
[107] Everything's expensive at this point.
[108] You buy two steaks, what is that?
[109] Like, $40, 50 bucks?
[110] If you've been a nice place?
[111] You know how much I paid for frozen peas last night?
[112] I went to Publix yesterday on the way home.
[113] I'm like, I'm going to make a little dinner.
[114] There's your first mistake.
[115] Frozen peas.
[116] A bag, a little bag, it's not like three, three, $3 .50.
[117] I'm sorry.
[118] $3 .50.
[119] $2 for $7?
[120] I almost didn't get him.
[121] Peas are super underrated.
[122] I like frozen peas.
[123] I like, I'll throw peas in anything.
[124] I was making pasta last night with a little sausage.
[125] Throw some peas in there.
[126] I love peas.
[127] Anthony has a core memory that makes him hate peas because one time, and this is, I don't know if this is a Spanish thing.
[128] Juju, if you could help me out, it might be in your background.
[129] But does your family force you to eat whatever's on your plate?
[130] Absolutely.
[131] So that happened to him one time.
[132] and it was at his aunt's house, and it was peas.
[133] And he just did not like peas.
[134] And she's like, you're not getting up until you eat all those peas.
[135] Not only, she forced him to eat it, he threw up all over the table.
[136] I was with that way with eggs for a long time.
[137] Because my grandma was like, you're going to eat those eggs.
[138] And you're going to eat this banana.
[139] And I was like, Grandma, I'm dying.
[140] And she's like, oh, so eggs I hated for a long time.
[141] And then now, but not back now.
[142] My granddaddy don't walk me up plenty of night at the dinner table.
[143] Go to bed, bro.
[144] Just go to bed.
[145] And throw out the peas.
[146] Yeah, fall asleep.
[147] I'd rather fall asleep than have to eat something I don't like.
[148] But vomiting on the table, I feel like if you're a parent, you learn your lesson there.
[149] Like, never do that again.
[150] It's sort of inhumane, isn't it, to force someone to eat something?
[151] Until they vomit, yes.
[152] Your grandma used to make you eggs a lot, huh?
[153] Mine too.
[154] My grandma, God rest her soul, your mom, Nana, lover.
[155] Did not make good eggs.
[156] Very runny.
[157] Very watery.
[158] Very runny eggs.
[159] While you guys are both here, I know why we say, who won.
[160] but Juju doesn't know why we say it.
[161] So can you guys rehash that inside joke?
[162] Yeah, every time, it would usually be my brother was down visiting, so Christopher and my brother and I would play golf.
[163] My brother and I stink.
[164] Christopher's really good.
[165] So there's no doubt who won.
[166] But every time we walked in, all sweaty from golf, my mother would be there on the couch, also visiting, and she would say, who won?
[167] Who won?
[168] Every time.
[169] It was like, Nana.
[170] It was just like, oh, Christopher did Nana.
[171] But she would say it just like that.
[172] Who won?
[173] Would she be surprised every time?
[174] Oh, that's good nice.
[175] I think Dickie's going to win this game.
[176] You have a great old lady voice.
[177] You do.
[178] The best was going to the grocery store with my nana and my uncle Dick and them being, like, they would get separated and my nana would just...
[179] Dickie!
[180] Dickie!
[181] Did you ever get lost at the grocery store, Chris?
[182] I didn't because I'm a big cart rider.
[183] like I'm riding that I'm getting on the front I'm riding like a garbage truck you guys know like you hop on hop off I'm not getting in I'm not sitting in the kid chair my daughter does it now she takes after me in this she loves to just ride on the front of the train my parents lost me at UNOS once what it's they tell everyone this story I was like three and I wasn't at they were at UNOS and the waitress or waiter like sat them at their table that's deep dish UNOS yeah yeah yeah Chicago yeah it wasn't in Chicago though apparently it was like somewhere There's one in Orlando.
[184] Yeah I think it was in Orlando We were like on a Disney trip or something I don't know how you do that.
[185] This is actually a great segment Potentially for it could be this show it could be the main show Old show bits that you don't get That you just need a reminder of I have one And I don't really know if it's a show bit But I don't know what COB stands for When when Stu Gott says COB I'm like was that like some sort of acronym that we don't know about like cash on delivery?
[186] And did he just screw that up?
[187] Like, I have no idea what COB is this, right?
[188] I know this one.
[189] Close of business.
[190] That's what it was.
[191] Oh.
[192] I don't know that acronym either.
[193] I actually didn't know that one either.
[194] I know it as EOD.
[195] End of day.
[196] End of day, end of D .O. Or EOB, end of business.
[197] I thought everyone knew.
[198] I thought that was a stu thing that he just messed up.
[199] C -O -B is when Willow nibbles you.
[200] She's Cobbin.
[201] Yeah.
[202] Well, I actually have another, it's sort of in a similar vein, a story that I have told on the show before.
[203] But you said, your parents losing you at a pizzeria, my parents lost me in the New York City.
[204] New York City.
[205] Do you guys watch what we do in the shadows?
[206] No. I've seen too.
[207] You are the most devious bastard in New York City.
[208] I thought you were talking about the El Paso Salsa.
[209] New York City.
[210] Yeah, so I was being babysat by my father and everybody else in the family left, and we lived on the 26th floor of an apartment in the east side.
[211] of Manhattan and my dad fell asleep and somehow I left I was I think one I think she said I was 11 or 12 months old wow walked somehow got down all those you know probably just hopped in an elevator looked around and said hey guys and just jumped in the and um a friend of the family found me like a block and a half down the street in like a long t -shirt he said I looked like a girl because I guess I had like fluffy hair and so he pulled up my shirt to see if I was a boy or not realize I was a boy and then said, oh, I know this kid, and then took him back to my grandparents' house.
[212] And my mom had basically gotten home about three minutes before I got turned in, if you will, and she was about to kill my dad.
[213] I have a lot of questions about this good Samaritan.
[214] Right?
[215] How good of a Samaritan?
[216] Really.
[217] If I was a girl, you're saying there might have been a different ending.
[218] I'm just going to maybe ask.
[219] I would just kind of just, either way, I'm going to save you, so I don't really need to know.
[220] I don't remember every detail.
[221] I was a toddler.
[222] Obviously, I don't remember any of this.
[223] They told me this story a bunch of times.
[224] How he figured out I was a boy, I'm not sure.
[225] I'm like, are you Israel, Gutierrez?
[226] My toddler.
[227] Who are you?
[228] Who won?
[229] Speaking of UNOs, though, we just, a little segue.
[230] I got a question.
[231] The world most famous question ever.
[232] Do you stack a draw two over top the other drop two that someone else pulled?
[233] This is a big Uno thing.
[234] Can I put two drop twos out?
[235] That's how I want to play.
[236] My wife and my kid, I don't play that way.
[237] It's funner when you stack them up.
[238] The official rules, and Uno did this on Twitter a couple years back, as they said, no, you can't stack them.
[239] Don't tell me my house rules.
[240] House rules are house rules.
[241] Just the same way with pool.
[242] You can play pool like the traditional really strict way at every bar you go to, but nah, you're going to play the way friends play.
[243] Once I purchase the Uno cards, the rules are mine to create.
[244] I can do whatever I want.
[245] Yeah, make it your own game.
[246] Exactly.
[247] So if I want to, and it's funner, if you stack like, oh, draw four, draw four.
[248] The next guy's drawing 12 cards.
[249] that's great.
[250] That's fantastic.
[251] You can stack a draw four on top of draw twos.
[252] No, no, no, no, no, totally different.
[253] This is a tweet right here.
[254] Also, like, who are you to tell me?
[255] Uno needs to know who it is, too.
[256] Be Uno.
[257] Like, Uno now has, not surprisingly, this Uno brand, they're like, all right, how do we grow and make more money?
[258] So there's different versions of Uno now.
[259] There's like two -sided.
[260] It's over -complicated, I'm telling you.
[261] I might be a violator.
[262] I think I might be a violator.
[263] Overrule?
[264] Yeah, the draw -four rule, because in college, I used to be like, draw four, draw four, no, draw two, draw two, draw four, uno out.
[265] Yeah.
[266] Just like all your cards?
[267] Yeah, what I mean?
[268] So I think I have violated it.
[269] If you get dealt that good a hand, I mean, you deserve to win.
[270] Yeah.
[271] I mean.
[272] They have this one Uno game that if you pick a card at the wrong time, a bunch of cards shoot at your face.
[273] Oh.
[274] And that just seems random.
[275] Like, how did I lose just because the machine told me I was going to lose?
[276] There are far better feelings in the world than having like three cards left and they're all wilds.
[277] Oh, you're just like my daughter sitting over there.
[278] and I'm like, there's nothing you can do right now.
[279] And then she hits me with like a draw four, and I'm like, damn it.
[280] Got your ass.
[281] She beats you a lot.
[282] When's the time you played Uno?
[283] You guys are speaking of foreign language?
[284] You don't even know Uno?
[285] I know the name.
[286] I know the name of the game.
[287] I knew it was a card game.
[288] I couldn't tell you the rules.
[289] When you guys are talking about draw two, draw four, stacking.
[290] I have no idea.
[291] It's a very simple game of colors.
[292] That's all you have to know.
[293] See what kind of childhood I had?
[294] Never played Uno with me. So it's not numbers.
[295] It's colors.
[296] No, there are numbers, and you can match numbers or you can match colors.
[297] and you go around trying to get rid of your cards and then when you get to the last card you yell Uno or you have to draw.
[298] Here's a question.
[299] Here's a question.
[300] How many cards, if you yell Uno for me, how many cards do I pick up?
[301] I think it's also like a...
[302] Two?
[303] Really?
[304] That's it's it.
[305] I think that's what we do is two.
[306] What is the rule on when you are able to say Uno and when somebody can catch you?
[307] Because most of the times, people say it with the card in their hand as they're putting it down.
[308] I thought the rule is you've got to put it down before you can say it.
[309] so slick with my six -year -old with this.
[310] I'm like, Ju -Ju is correct.
[311] You draw two cards when you do not get Uno.
[312] But I'm going to need Ju -Ju's ruling on this then, too.
[313] What is the rule on saying Uno?
[314] Read us the rules for calling Uno, but go ahead.
[315] You got to get creative.
[316] You got to deek out the players kind of like, or you act subtle.
[317] I'm always like, oh man, I guess I have to reach for a card here.
[318] Oh, no, I'm just kidding.
[319] Like, you always got to do like the little like I'm not, like, you can't separate, you got to keep them together until the last second.
[320] And so you don't, it's not like poker.
[321] you don't have to show your cards.
[322] Like, you can make it seem like you've had one card the whole time.
[323] That's another move.
[324] Because if you only have to, some people hold their cards under the table.
[325] I'm like, no, no, no. Cards got to be above a table.
[326] I have no idea.
[327] Have you ever met this person?
[328] You play with this person where they're like, all right, the color is blue and seven right now.
[329] So I'm going to, the top card here is blue and seven.
[330] But I'm throwing down like four cards at once.
[331] Like, people get slick with like you stack them up against each other.
[332] So it's like, look, here, I'm throwing out blue seven, but they really just put down three cards.
[333] That's like next level cheating.
[334] It's a little much.
[335] It's some 69 guys out there, too, where they'll put a 9 on top of a 6 because it's upside down.
[336] You have to pay attention.
[337] Watch what that line is.
[338] 69, guys.
[339] Where's that line?
[340] Where is that line?
[341] It says, if you don't yell Uno and you're a cop before the next player begins their turn, you must draw two cards.
[342] Once a player has no cards left, the round is over.
[343] The controversy is when I'm putting the card down before I release the card, someone tries to catch me on Uno.
[344] No, you have to have a release because you don't have Uno left until you put it down.
[345] They're like, Graceland, is that Santa Claus?
[346] Uno!
[347] At the same time, you cannot call it, you can't pre -Uono.
[348] You don't even know, I do that exactly.
[349] Is there a false Uno penalty?
[350] If you yell Uno for somebody else thinking they only had one card and forgot, but they had two, I think that's a penalty.
[351] I think you pick up two cards for that.
[352] I think you should do it too.
[353] I self -imposed that penalty on myself when I was in Orlando last month with my family.
[354] When I called Uno and my nephew and he had two cards, and I picked up two cards because I'm a good player.
[355] Nice.
[356] Self -imposed penalty.
[357] A little pre -in -o.
[358] A fair player.
[359] Fair player.
[360] Probably not a good player.
[361] Man of integrity.
[362] A man that reminded the teacher that homework was due.
[363] Welcome to mystery.
[364] Welcome to mystery.
[365] I've been wanting to do like a, not a Tony show style thing, but like a metal arc after dark game night thing.
[366] Yeah.
[367] Because me and Danny GQ figured out how we can hang a camera from right up where you guys are sitting.
[368] Oh, I got the perfect game.
[369] We'll be pointed down and we can play and the board will have like its own camera.
[370] Oh, that's great.
[371] So like if you would do risk or something like that, you can see the game.
[372] game board at all times.
[373] I like catchphrase.
[374] You play catchphrase?
[375] It's that...
[376] There's so many versions of this type of game where it's like they get a list of things you can't say kind of thing?
[377] Well, it's no, it's basically hot potato or musical chairs but in a game, right?
[378] So it tells you what you have to give the other person to say, and there's no rules, you just can't say that.
[379] I mean, the rules are, you can't say it rhymes with, you can't say it starts with, silly things like that, but you can do whatever you want, and then the timer's going off as you're talking, and so it goes faster, tick, tick, tick, tick, and then when it gets to the end, everybody's nervous and they can't really say it.
[380] And then if it goes off in your hand, the other team gets a point, and if you steal it, like if they give enough clues where the other team can now steal your answer, you get two points.
[381] And that game is fun.
[382] By the end, people start throwing the thing at each other after they get the clue.
[383] It's chaos.
[384] We'll have a good game, Nate.
[385] What was the game where you were trying to give somebody a clue on a word you were thinking of?
[386] Clue.
[387] No, but taboo.
[388] You couldn't say anything aloud.
[389] It's taboo.
[390] You were drawing.
[391] Pictionary.
[392] Oh, Pictionary.
[393] Pictionary.
[394] is a great game for something that we're trying to do here because then like you show people drawing and it would be good we played taboo the first Tony show and it was like you have to give hints there was no drawing but there was like certain words you can't say it came out shortly after tick -tac -toe not surprising my dad is a good drawer so it's not surprising that Pictionary would be like he's the kind of like right now you should do this and you can show the camera after just draw like a face my dad is he's a sneaky good artist well the key to the pickionary though is that you need to be able to draw something just like that like what animal is that What?
[395] An animal?
[396] A bird?
[397] It's a spider?
[398] Oh, spider, I guess.
[399] The key to talking like Michael Kling.
[400] I drew it too quick.
[401] Greg, I mean, Chris.
[402] I just said you're a good artist.
[403] I was going to say, never.
[404] Never.
[405] Dad, draw someone's face.
[406] Like, I just said you're a good artist.
[407] Who face you a woman to draw?
[408] Can I just show?
[409] What a sad cat.
[410] Like, I just said my dad's a good artist.
[411] I drew it in two seconds.
[412] But draw, like, flex a little here.
[413] Draw something impressive.
[414] I don't know what to draw.
[415] All right.
[416] We'll talk while you're doing it.
[417] We're not going to watch you.
[418] I don't know.
[419] I just want to watch.
[420] I'm just better than me. Like, I do not have, like, drawing is not a skill of mine.
[421] It's not my thing.
[422] So I'm really looking into this Uno rules here, and I don't really see a mention of calling a false Uno.
[423] And apparently there's customizable cards where you can draw your own rules.
[424] I've never played with any of those.
[425] I have.
[426] Yeah.
[427] It's not good.
[428] Wait, you're saying that other people can't call Uno?
[429] No, no, no. Like, if you put down the card or, like, or someone calls Uno on you and you don't have.
[430] have it there's you actually have two cards yeah there's like no penalty yeah for them for them richard nixon there well i i'm sorry to the audience for saying that i doubt was a good drawer because show the camera you know what he went from the camera the cat that you could not discern what it was to a pretty decent richard nixon which camera are you the one right in front of you is yeah he's got it on the preview they got oh it's not good yeah he can do way better than that it's it's it took me 10 i thought you i just remember you like doodling at a restaurant And all of a sudden, you're holding up a napkin, and I'm like, wow, that's pretty good.
[431] If you were to ask me what U .S. president this was, I would say that is either Richard Nixon or George W. Bush.
[432] Either way, it looks like a president.
[433] Okay, thank you.
[434] Like, who died and made me, Pablo Picasso?
[435] I love how I say it looks like a president, so it's just a regular human being at any moment.
[436] It's like a presidential human.
[437] Yeah, exactly.
[438] You want to turn Nixon into a balloon?
[439] There.
[440] How's that?
[441] Wow, a J .D. Vance.
[442] Hello.
[443] What other game should I consider for my, game night idea hmm I'm thinking like tabletop games I saw a post online on Instagram the other day that a family was renovating their house and they pulled up the carpet and underneath the carpet there was a full -sized monopoly board oh wow like a human -sized monopoly board yeah like I'll look it up right now so you human size yes so humans are the pieces there right that was a good situation probably it probably was like a hostel before they moved in I'm gonna see if I can get the picture well it wow so how big are the dice I don't know They need to make a speed monopoly game.
[444] My only problem with Monopoly is it's just too long.
[445] It goes on forever.
[446] Forever.
[447] There needs to be like a one hour of Monopoly game.
[448] A Monopoly deal.
[449] I think Jessica Smetana, she does Monopoly deal.
[450] It's like a card game version of Monopoly.
[451] It's like an Uno.
[452] You don't know Uno, but I think it's like a something like that.
[453] Oh, I would play that.
[454] You know what?
[455] Yeah.
[456] I was at a housewarming party the other day.
[457] And I was about to mention the fact that...
[458] Did you bring a gift?
[459] Well, that's what annoyed me. I was about to mention the fact that they offered settlers of Catan.
[460] Yeah, get your thimble ass over here.
[461] Mike, we can hear you.
[462] Oh, shit.
[463] Me and Jujo were talking about how they probably use Monopoly World to play like crazy sex games.
[464] Get your thimble ass over here.
[465] Martinette.
[466] See that?
[467] Well, you guys could probably bear that.
[468] Oh, wow, that is huge.
[469] Yeah, underneath the living room carpet.
[470] Wow.
[471] Yeah.
[472] So I was going to mention that I was annoyed that they offered Settlers of Catan as a game night game.
[473] But that's what really bugged me, Chris, is if you have a housewarming party, now you can register for a housewarming party.
[474] party.
[475] So now when you get married, people give you gifts, when you have baby people give you gifts, when you have a house warming, you can register for that.
[476] That seems like a bit much.
[477] Yeah.
[478] That's like friend inflation.
[479] Like you shouldn't have to pay that much just to be friends with someone.
[480] Yeah, you're getting a toaster and you're loving it.
[481] That's it.
[482] You're not getting anything.
[483] You're not getting anything.
[484] I'm coming over.
[485] Your house will be warmer because I'm in.
[486] You get a bottle of wine.
[487] Yeah, you're getting a mid -price bottle of wine or a hanging plant.
[488] Correct.
[489] Yeah.
[490] Or the live laugh love sign.
[491] Yeah.
[492] We actually did.
[493] pretty much to that thought is we bought him a bottle of an extra aniejo tequila drank about three -quarters of that thing before we left.
[494] It's a gift for everyone.
[495] We're all here together.
[496] Alcohol is to play, for sure.
[497] And also like for, I feel like that's always a safe gift for like an older man. Like my dad, after a while, you can't get him anything.
[498] He buys everything himself and then like, you know, I could take him to games and stuff, but after a while it's like, what are you drinking lately?
[499] Here you go.
[500] Because it's just easier to do it, you know?
[501] One time I Uber just straight to my cousin's house.
[502] I totally forgot.
[503] I'm like, oh, you drinking whiskey?
[504] Jameson.
[505] 30 minutes later, it was there?
[506] Did you guys see that there was, a transition, did you guys see that there was a list from awful announcing of the top 10 around the horn panelists of all time?
[507] And you made it.
[508] Did not.
[509] Whoa, insulting.
[510] I made the O -L -I.
[511] I made an honorable mention.
[512] Oh, I saw you, I know the thing you, I saw you on there, so I mistook you for top ten.
[513] I made honorable mention with Pablo Tori.
[514] Some people at least now.
[515] it proves that if you're on the honorable mention some people just associate you're in there there you go right it didn't really bother me that they misspelled my name it's kind of like the SNL cast thing like who it it's it's one of those things where you don't expect to be on the top 10 but when you start seeing people who are yeah that's when you get mad yeah no name names it wasn't so much that I wasn't in the top 10 that bothered me it wasn't so much that they didn't spell my name correctly they put it in the bold one it was correct like in the actual text of it but in the bold listings of who made the honorable mention.
[516] I didn't make it.
[517] What bothered me is in that explanation of why I wasn't an honorable mention, it called me, and this was the best I guess compliment I got, a volume shooter.
[518] Oh, God.
[519] So first of all, if I'm on around the horn a lot, it's because they ask me to be on around the horn a lot, but secondary, volume shooter?
[520] Like, I'm somebody that just gives take after, take after, take after, take.
[521] Like, say like, oh, he pours his heart out every once in a while.
[522] shows but volume shooter it's like they didn't even like they've never seen an episode that I've been on it did that one didn't make it did we invent that term for Carmelo Anthony I thought it was Alan Iverson it could be but yeah Jorge Sedano yeah what's wrong with George they're just been talking about your Halloween costumes that's the other thing you're a volume Halloween costume shooter because you are impeccable economy Gregor Drake I fell off toward the end and that's probably because I had to do that stuff at home because I had the studio at home and I didn't have any help but that's their most famous episode, their most popular episode, and they call me the King of Halloween, and I'm an honorable mention with two T's.
[523] Now, this didn't bother you, clearly.
[524] I haven't, no, you weren't bothered that.
[525] Yeah, they're bothered at all.
[526] I started looking at the list.
[527] I have not gone to the top five yet.
[528] Woody Page has to be number one, right?
[529] I've seen the sign, I don't remember.
[530] Wrong, wrong, wrong.
[531] I don't remember seeing.
[532] Maybe Blackstone.
[533] Of Woody Page.
[534] I don't, I'm just talking about like the old Jackie McMullen.
[535] I don't, I don't remember seeing an episode where I don't see Woody Page.
[536] I think Woody was number two, if I recall the list correctly.
[537] man alright let me scroll here j a donde's got to be up there yeah absolutely j a j a not only what j a stands for i was gonna say i've been sitting on this joke forever if i ever said like a goodbye jay you're not only a great friend but a great starting hand in poker but i'm not really gonna get that it's not a bad joke but if you don't play poker you don't think about it's a good joke then actually let's make some news here why don't you comment on around the horn ending oh is it i saw a story that said it might come to an August 25th.
[538] Yeah, that's what I meant.
[539] Like, they've announced that it might.
[540] Is that not confirmed?
[541] Oh, that's just the reports?
[542] Okay, sorry, never mind.
[543] You know how those reports are.
[544] They're usually pretty true.
[545] But, no, I had no idea about that.
[546] I have no idea about the future of the show or anything.
[547] Back, I haven't been on the show since June.
[548] Oh.
[549] Okay, then.
[550] Nice.
[551] That's why I disrespected you on that list.
[552] They just haven't seen you.
[553] Probably.
[554] Recy bias.
[555] Recy bias.
[556] You got something to say, Chris?
[557] We'll be back.
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[592] Ball.
[593] Chris, I have something to admit.
[594] Oh, boy.
[595] But it's like I'm not ashamed to tell you.
[596] I'm ashamed to tell like Mike Ryan and Amin and them, but I very much regret asking to be a part of the shit chat.
[597] Why?
[598] First of, I mean.
[599] I feel like people.
[600] People have mailed it in with that.
[601] There's like...
[602] Not Amin El Hasso.
[603] I was like, Amin and Zach Harper and Brad Williams are really into it.
[604] Everybody else, I feel like has...
[605] Yeah, no, they're...
[606] See, Amin, we probably should have known this, right?
[607] Like, he's so descriptive when he talks about his dreams.
[608] Annoyingly descriptive, I say.
[609] He is as descriptive when he's talking about pooping.
[610] Like, smell, texture, and everything.
[611] And I'm just like, oh.
[612] And I never get more scared than when I see on the previews, shit chat, image attached.
[613] Oh, yeah.
[614] What is that picture?
[615] What is that picture?
[616] I don't want to see it.
[617] Luckily for you, we've never had anyone throw in a piece of shit.
[618] Because I had a roommate in college who had a very long turd.
[619] Always?
[620] Was super impressed by it?
[621] No, just one.
[622] Oh, okay.
[623] Super impressed by it.
[624] Took a picture of it, put it on a t -shirt and wore the t -shirt.
[625] Oh, my God.
[626] You went out college.
[627] So that had me scarred.
[628] A shit shirt.
[629] Wow.
[630] A shirt.
[631] I got a homeboy who randomly every now and did.
[632] He'll take a massive dump and just send me the picture.
[633] Yeah, you son of them.
[634] I feel like we all have that friend.
[635] I've been sent a few shits in my life, for sure.
[636] And it's like, honestly, I've stopped.
[637] There was one time where Brad Williams randomly text me was like, please participate in the shit chat.
[638] I was like, was this like a conversation?
[639] Were you guys talking about me behind my back?
[640] Like, hey, maybe he's got some, you know, incontinence or something.
[641] But yeah, so now every once in a while I'll throw the emoji on there.
[642] But then, I don't know.
[643] I just feel like it's gross.
[644] Like, you don't need to know if I'm pooping.
[645] And if you're doing it at the same.
[646] time is that cool I do often like sometimes I'll wait 10 minutes if I'm actually pooping and a text comes in like from Mike that he's pooping I'm like I don't want to just put back right now like then he'll think I'm pooping only because he's pooping so I'll wait like 10 minutes later and be like now I'm pooping even though I'm really done even though I'm really done pooping so you're worried that he's thinking that you're only pooping because he decided I don't want Mike thinking that I'm just pooping because of him oh right and I also don't know how to ask out I don't know how to ask out you can just leave no you just you should wait till the next notification come up and then just take that as I'm leaving.
[647] And so that person would always feel bad.
[648] My shit was one too much.
[649] The next time you're a pulsed.
[650] Is this conversation proof that there really are too many group chats?
[651] Yes.
[652] It's a good.
[653] It's proof of that.
[654] There's way too many on Mike's phone.
[655] Let me ask you this in all seriously.
[656] Go ahead.
[657] Ask.
[658] Proudly, I am not in the shit.
[659] What is a typical comment?
[660] It's just about one's own.
[661] The way it started was poop emojis.
[662] When you poop, It's just like a logging system to make sure we're all regular as a group.
[663] Oh, okay.
[664] So it's like, yeah, it's good to know.
[665] Poop emoji, poop.
[666] Like, when am I pooping?
[667] Now I can look back at the week and say, oh, okay, I tend to poop in the morning.
[668] They like to tell you where, like what city there is?
[669] I mean is always like pre -radio, eight Indian food last night.
[670] And it's all, like, he gives like way too many details.
[671] Like, whereas most people are just poop emoji.
[672] I'm poop.
[673] Yeah, it's part culinary chat.
[674] It's part travel chat.
[675] It's part.
[676] You complaining about group chats is hilarious.
[677] Because the one group chat I'm in with you is our bowling group chat.
[678] And it's literally my father -in -law, my good friend Anthony, and my brother.
[679] Those are the people outside of me and my dad in it.
[680] And my dad is just so confused by this.
[681] He has my brother's number.
[682] So now there's two other numbers.
[683] My friend Anthony and my father -in -law, he's just like, why doesn't it say their name?
[684] What's with the, and I'm like, dad, you can save their name.
[685] I don't know either of their phone numbers by heart.
[686] Right, but it's one of those things where that's your call.
[687] Like, if you went in, you can set, okay, this number is this person.
[688] I don't want to work that hard.
[689] They're texting me. But it's just so funny.
[690] The way he's just like, how do I know which one's Al and which one's Anthony?
[691] All I see is phone numbers.
[692] And I'm like, oh, this is such a fun conversation.
[693] I'm like, put Al or Anthony instead of a phone number.
[694] You can do that.
[695] Let them do it for me. They need to sign their text.
[696] That's what Greg is the first initial.
[697] They're both based.
[698] We end up one more together, the fantasy football league.
[699] Oh, yeah, yeah.
[700] He's in that one as well.
[701] Yeah.
[702] In that one, people had the courtesy to sign it at first.
[703] Hey, this is, I'm Jew.
[704] Yeah, thank you.
[705] He does, that group chat?
[706] Oh, my God, he's just like, I don't, you tell me when I need to be, like, I'm not even reading that group chat.
[707] Well, I mean, group chats, come on.
[708] That's good at Alex.
[709] A little to Alex.
[710] Yeah, Alex.
[711] Yeah.
[712] I had my first spin -off of a group chat where I think Ethan over here started a puck boy's chat off of our hockey chat.
[713] And I'm like, I can't keep up with this much.
[714] It's basically the hockey chat for people who don't want to use Invisible Inc. When they talk about other stuff.
[715] Yeah, that's basically what it came.
[716] like we want it's that it's not even really a hockey chat it's more like social guys chat yeah i'm not in it i'm offended it's a we're tired of mike's rule i hate dude yeah no church he's just about being in a group chat with mike ryan is the invisible ink it's just his friends do i'm not blaming him he's not even often the biggest culprit of this i hate the pictures where i don't want to like scan a picture if you're putting a picture in here just have it be a regular picture right and if it's invisible i don't read it i better be sham I better be blown away by whatever that picture.
[717] It's like, oh, this guy re -signed with Calgary.
[718] Oh, I don't like that.
[719] Well, that's a thing.
[720] Well, because the invisible ink in that chat is supposed to be for non -hockey items, I think.
[721] I never told me these rules, I'm assuming.
[722] The non -hockey items are a chug.
[723] Like, you're not supposed to go in that chat with any non -hocke.
[724] That's what I. What's the puck boys chat?
[725] Why am I not?
[726] I'm offended.
[727] Why is there a section of the hockey chat that I'm not a part of?
[728] Ethan, Ethan created this chat.
[729] This Ethan is very eager.
[730] Yeah, one of these days when he was like, probably had a little too much to drink at But what's the re -like, what is this, like the puck boys talk what?
[731] Because there were, there were guys in there who were like he wanted to chat, but we didn't want it to invisible link everything, like he said.
[732] So we just like started talking.
[733] And then he's like, who should be in here?
[734] I'm like, bro, I don't know, it's your thing.
[735] So he invited, like, some people.
[736] Look at him trying to distance himself.
[737] This is, Chris.
[738] Fuentes and Ethan coming up with the group.
[739] But first of all, don't put me in it.
[740] Ethan came up with that.
[741] This eager Ethan.
[742] Ethan.
[743] Ethan and Mochetter.
[744] Quote, salute, Ethan.
[745] New chat for the hockey homies that want to talk to each other but don't necessarily want to talk hockey all the time.
[746] Signed.
[747] Ethan.
[748] Thank you.
[749] Thank you for absolving me. Who's in that chat?
[750] And why wasn't I added?
[751] Real quick.
[752] Fuentes, I don't have your number saved.
[753] So I only know there's two people in this chat that I don't know.
[754] Read off the names that you know.
[755] I'm livid right now.
[756] He right now he and Peri, I think, would he have.
[757] Fuentes, am I okay?
[758] Am I going to get in trouble?
[759] Am I going to get kicked out of the chat?
[760] No. I'm okay.
[761] We're here.
[762] Josh Appel.
[763] Yes.
[764] Maricio.
[765] Ross.
[766] I am livid Fuentes Those are like ones that I have I am livid You're in I am livid Hey Ethan Talk to Ethan Whenever he gets back From Connecticut or whatever he's doing Why are you livid I'm not He's not He just talked about How he wanted Less group chats I'd be thrilled to be left Out of somebody's group chat Are you kidding me My Ecuadorian friend Who?
[767] Mike's Ecuadorian Oh yeah That's Joel I think Joel Yeah He's in the main hockey chat As much as I hate This many group chats If there's not a response to my attempt to be funny F you guys There is something about I'm with you if you write something in a group chat and then like nothing is written for six hours It is a bad feeling Right there she wrote Does that also apply to the shit chat Where you make a very solid description About what you've just done in the can And it just sits there It just dies nobody responds Nobody says I wish I was you That sounds like a glorious experience There's some back and forth, but it's usually Zach and Amin.
[768] Okay.
[769] Like right here, here's today at 10 .41 a .m., Amin, first dump back on the mainland.
[770] Oh, that's in Hawaii for a wedding.
[771] Well, see, that's historic.
[772] Hawaii, wait.
[773] Ain't Hawaii considered the mainland now?
[774] I think he make a 50 continuous, right?
[775] Yeah.
[776] Or 48 continuous.
[777] And then he sent an Instagram video and said, watch this video.
[778] It's just like something oozing out of a cup that looks like shit.
[779] Yeah, that's worth it.
[780] Did anybody respond?
[781] No. That's like it's 1 .20 now.
[782] That's a good three hours.
[783] Just no response.
[784] Sit in that, I mean.
[785] How do you feel?
[786] Yeah, that's soul crushing.
[787] Crazy.
[788] Nothing worse than sending out a joke and crickets and then some other topic comes up.
[789] Oh, no. Oh, God.
[790] Somebody just puts a tweet in there of like someone signing somewhere.
[791] It's like, but what about what I just?
[792] Yeah, I'm going to start apologizing when I have a throw a bad joke.
[793] Sorry, guys.
[794] This, Ethan.
[795] We've got to reply to your own bad joke.
[796] You're like, you guys, did you see it?
[797] Did you see it?
[798] I thought it was funny.
[799] I'm texting Ethan right now.
[800] Do you really, I mean, do you want me to give you some samples?
[801] No, no, no. I don't want to be, but yet, I just want to give.
[802] There's been a lot of Olympics.
[803] A lot of Olympics.
[804] A lot of Olympics.
[805] I think there was some, some soccer talk a little bit.
[806] I'd be, sometimes I'd be with my girl, and then the guy's group chat I'm in with this, it's a count of the dings group chat.
[807] And so I'm sitting there, and these brothers are single, so they'll be sitting in some wild shit.
[808] And I open the phone and there's some ass.
[809] Damn it.
[810] Baby, baby, they crazy's hell, ain't they, baby.
[811] You see this?
[812] They are crazy.
[813] Because there's been some questionable activity in the hockey chat.
[814] There's been some questionable activity in the hockey chat.
[815] And I feel like Mike polices that just for me. Just for me. They're just like, hey, not everybody.
[816] It's like, whatever.
[817] It's hilarious.
[818] I don't really care.
[819] Thank God you're not in the golf chat.
[820] Thank God you're not in the golf chat.
[821] Because that thing is a Republican chat, if I've ever been in one.
[822] Izzy dropped a banger of a joke the other day that had me fucking laughing all out I'm not gonna...
[823] Oh, and the puck boys one?
[824] Oh, this is great.
[825] Maybe you'll hear it one did.
[826] Inside jokes.
[827] It was hilarious, Izzy.
[828] Thank you.
[829] Just so you know.
[830] It was great.
[831] Man. I thought we were out of time.
[832] No, we're not.
[833] But yes, I'm always shocked, like, how many group chants Mike Ryan's in.
[834] And because I, if one of those group chats is going off, yeah.
[835] It's like, yo, quick, like, notifications off.
[836] I can't imagine, like, four or five of them.
[837] In my car, when, like, I have my Bluetooth hooked up.
[838] Like, the chat pops up on, like, my dash thing.
[839] And my wife, like, now she kind of gets it.
[840] She's just like, what, shit chat?
[841] And there's, like, a shit emoji.
[842] She's like, what is it?
[843] And then, like, like, puckdale talent.
[844] Like, what are these things that you're in?
[845] Like, I'm in a baseball, like, Bunn, Asvae Garcia or something.
[846] Like, it's bleep.
[847] Asfa, how do you say his name?
[848] Avacil.
[849] Garcia or something, yeah, like.
[850] Close enough.
[851] That's who we don't like in that chat.
[852] But, yeah, it's just, I'm in different chats and my wife sees them pop up and she's just like, what are you?
[853] What is this?
[854] Yeah.
[855] Yeah, like, well, it helped me one thing, because I didn't have these numbers saved either.
[856] And all of a sudden, everybody's wishing him happy birthday.
[857] I'm like, oh, okay.
[858] Now I have this number that I might need for work one day or if I want to bitch about having a boat invite or something like that.
[859] You know, now I know the number I can text.
[860] You know, we're getting out.
[861] Check the, check the puck boys chat.
[862] Uh -oh.
[863] I want to do a, oh.
[864] I shamed Ethan.
[865] And it took me like 10 seconds to get put it in here, Chris Cody.
[866] I wrote, I just wrote to him, secret hockey chat dot, dot, dot, hurtful.
[867] You should have said dead to me. We're getting the boat re -apulstered.
[868] So if we have one little Dan Lovetard show day, come on down.
[869] All right.
[870] Take about seven.
[871] As long as Ethan's not there.
[872] I will be more than honored.
[873] I'm going to do a little shout -out right now for a random listener.
[874] We're going to do two shout -outs for two random listeners right now that you're just sitting around.
[875] And we appreciate you so much for listening.
[876] I want a shout -out.
[877] Derek Gilman right now.
[878] Wherever you are, Derek Gilman, I hope you're having a day you deserve.
[879] DeGill.
[880] Also, Michael Graham.
[881] Oh, my God.
[882] Big Michael Graham.
[883] I hope you having a day you deserve as well.
[884] Salute to you for donating to Camp Fiesta.
[885] We appreciate you.
[886] Salute is Jeremy Tachey.
[887] I have one too, actually.
[888] Eddie Fuentes, who I met at Brightside.
[889] He gave me a great video of me crying like a baby when the Panthers were on the Stanley Cup.
[890] Yeah.
[891] Is it your brother?
[892] No, no. It's a guy I met there.
[893] And he said, I was there with Cynthia.
[894] When the guy came into Hyder, he was like, oh, man, love a show, love mystery crate.
[895] I'm a Fuentes too.
[896] I'm like, oh, okay, that's cool.
[897] And then he had this video.
[898] And I'm like, oh, send it to me. I'm like, oh, thank you.
[899] And then I've been trying a shot of mine.
[900] Just keep forgetting.
[901] And now he just reminded me. So thank you, Eddie, for the video.
[902] I got one quick question for Greg Cody, because jumping Charlie, I just learned this week, is a peer, is an excited peer.
[903] Do you know ways to calm that down?
[904] Because I don't want to visit you if your dog's going to pee on my foot.
[905] I haven't figured it out yet.
[906] I really haven't.
[907] It's time for you, sorry.
[908] Was that part of the sniffle part?
[909] of the, I don't know why.
[910] pop me up.
[911] What was that?
[912] Do you not know we were starting as you were counting down?
[913] Yeah, I didn't know.
[914] You got myself.
[915] Your countdown snuck up on you.
[916] Correct.
[917] It did.
[918] oh, Roy.
[919] Hey, Roy.
[920] You betcha.
[921] It's presented by Draft King.
[922] Stain, too, because you hear more about Draft Kings and all it has to offer throughout the show.
[923] Draft Kings, the crown is yours.
[924] It's a gambling company.
[925] It's, yeah.
[926] Thank you.
[927] You're going to learn more about it throughout the show.
[928] So informative.
[929] Anyway, we're stuck on no -run first innings, particularly because this show gets recorded in advance, and I can look these games up in advance.
[930] So we're going to do number one first innings.
[931] We're going to parlay at Mets at Angels this weekend, Tampa Bay at Houston, and San Francisco at Cincinnati.
[932] Yes, you're just going to bet under on the first inning.
[933] So basically you're betting on all these teams to score zero runs in their half of the first inning.
[934] You're waiting for a lot of excitement in those first innings.
[935] You betcha!
[936] I want to talk about another thing, and that is obviously when you're watching the Olympics, you're into a lot of sports you normally don't watch.
[937] This past weekend, I discovered air rifles and air pistols, and the outfits are so cool.
[938] We talked about it a little bit on the main show.
[939] What you guys did about the eyewear?
[940] What was her name?
[941] Makes you emotional.
[942] It's okay.
[943] Yeah, her name is Yeji Kim, I think.
[944] Jerk chicken.
[945] So that was the air pistol, the South Korean air pistol.
[946] That's it, correct.
[947] You can put that up.
[948] And we're talking about the eyewear.
[949] I had a really good joke about Indiana Jones villain.
[950] It looks like something out of Spy Kids.
[951] Did you just say?
[952] I had a really good joke.
[953] He did, and I said it.
[954] Tony laughed for like three days straight.
[955] We have a great collab on the Dr. Jones bit.
[956] Yeah, you followed my plan for the last time, Dr. Jones, and then boom, she shoots.
[957] Nice.
[958] But the rifle contestants, they had, like, these full -blown futuristic outfits, and I don't know really what to make of them.
[959] Seems like a lot for a shooting competition.
[960] Seems like these are kids who played video games who grew up to be actual accurate shooters here.
[961] Yeah, I think they're going to have, like, an e -sport Olympics.
[962] Pretty soon.
[963] Yeah.
[964] Yeah, I think that's happening, too.
[965] Thanks for being engaged on this, guys.
[966] What was so great?
[967] We didn't see the outfits, though, did we?
[968] Well, you know, I have like the C team back there.
[969] I mean, I thought you might have more on it.
[970] Oh, the C team.
[971] Yeah, well, I said it looks great, and you guys all stared at me. Like, so you didn't even have, like, any kind of, yeah, one of them's my brother and the other one's Jason who probably has a mouthful of rice right now.
[972] Jason's part of our A team.
[973] Let's cut it.
[974] So is your brother.
[975] Yeah, but Jason is, like, doing so much all day that, like, you got to, like, get them in slots.
[976] Including eating the largest lunches I've ever seen.
[977] Jason can put it down.
[978] Jason, like, also the creator of the pizza roll -up that we never got to see.
[979] The pizza blunt.
[980] Yeah.
[981] We got to get a picture of that one day.
[982] Share it with the audience.
[983] Speaking of the future, I saw the ISS pass over Miami this week.
[984] It was pretty neat.
[985] Have you guys ever seen that happen?
[986] Is it just like a big ship?
[987] No. So it's like, it looks like a little bit bigger than like the brightest star.
[988] And it moves kind of like an airplane, except it stays like in the same.
[989] spot in the sky and it just like kind of moves over you.
[990] It's very cool.
[991] I saw one of my meteorologist follows that I've been, have you guys been keeping up with this tropical disturbance?
[992] That's not far.
[993] Oh, no. It's coming.
[994] No. And it's, it may not be coming.
[995] It's still too early.
[996] It's going to move off short come.
[997] Talk to me when it's a cane.
[998] I follow a number of nice South Florida meteorologist.
[999] One of them is, his name's John Marath.
[1000] Oh, yeah.
[1001] I love that guy.
[1002] J. Mo. He's great.
[1003] And he tweeted out a little like, hey, the ISS is, coming, it's going to be over Miami tonight at 939 and sure enough I went out there, boom, right there, right in the sky it was great.
[1004] Is that why I saw on social media, you and Lehman were out and about last night?
[1005] Was it to go see that?
[1006] Yeah.
[1007] Were you going to a restaurant or something?
[1008] We went out to eat also.
[1009] Nice.
[1010] Nice.
[1011] I made a night of it.
[1012] You know, I'm not a big fan of going out to dinner when I have to get up early at like 6 a .m. the next morning and this morning I remembered why.
[1013] It's terrible.
[1014] Really?
[1015] Yeah.
[1016] It's not, I just feel terrible the next morning.
[1017] You feel too.
[1018] I only had like two glasses of wine.
[1019] See, that's the difference for me. I can go out to dinner, but I, I won't drink.
[1020] Yeah.
[1021] That's right.
[1022] Even, like, eating, like, a lot of restaurant food, like, I just woke up this morning.
[1023] It was, this is an unnatural time for my body to be awake.
[1024] Yeah.
[1025] At the same time, like, I don't want to dilute my whole week down to two nights of having fun.
[1026] Yeah, that's also terrible.
[1027] I'll just, but I'll tough it out.
[1028] Like, I'll have a bad morning until, like, oh, are you guys, do you have to give yourself pep talks in the morning?
[1029] Like, to get up this early as as we do?
[1030] No, I just lay down in the bat, though.
[1031] Well, that's old me. All right, new me just lays in bed and...
[1032] What is your pep talk?
[1033] What do you say to yourself?
[1034] I just think of what day it is.
[1035] Like, Monday's hard because it's like, shit, it's just Monday.
[1036] Once you get to Tuesday and Wednesday, like, all right, we're almost there.
[1037] Tuesday's easy, because Tuesday's, if I'm on the schedule, I know your dad's here.
[1038] And then there's, like, built -in content.
[1039] Like, I know I'm like, all right, today will be a good day because Greg's here.
[1040] I don't know if you guys do this, but whenever I'm on the show and I get here at 8 a .m., which means for me, since I live in Lauderdale, it's an hour drive.
[1041] Same.
[1042] I'm, you know, way earlier than normal.
[1043] I'm out like a light for three hours.
[1044] Like, I'm, like, when you get home?
[1045] Oh, 100%.
[1046] Like, I might actually miss the gym sometimes when I do this show.
[1047] I have to take out my contacts when I get home because the lights bother my eyes so much that, like, I have like a front headache every day at like 1 .30.
[1048] Like, it's coming right now.
[1049] I feel it.
[1050] So as soon as I get home, I take the contacts out, get under a blanket, two -hour nap, like, alcohol.
[1051] Monday is a big post -show nap day for me. that's really the only day I'd say a nap post show Did you guys have Charlie Kravitz on Mystery Crate when he was here?
[1052] Yeah, we tried to kidnap him.
[1053] It didn't work.
[1054] Tried to kidnap him and keep him.
[1055] Yeah, I think he'd be fun to keep him.
[1056] Do you remember anything you talked about on Mystery Crate?
[1057] That doesn't matter if you don't.
[1058] TV shows, I think.
[1059] We did the TV show rankings.
[1060] Yeah, TV show rankings that I found on Twitter.
[1061] I love Charlie.
[1062] I worked with Charlie as a producer when he was on HQ and debatable.
[1063] Bonifides.
[1064] Yeah, and now I love that he's like, you can actually see his face now.
[1065] You went from only hearing his voice.
[1066] to then seeing his fingers, undebatable, to now seeing his full face.
[1067] Nice fingers.
[1068] Okay.
[1069] I don't know him.
[1070] Himbo.
[1071] Yeah, like Himbo.
[1072] Kind of like that.
[1073] And so I, but every time I see Charlie, I have a little bit of a scare in my body because it happened to me that thing where you accidentally send a text to the wrong person.
[1074] And the text that I sent him took some explaining.
[1075] So he's the one you meant the text or you sent him a text on accident?
[1076] I meant to text my buddy, Chris.
[1077] Ah, thank you.
[1078] And instead, not you.
[1079] Chris C, also, but also not you.
[1080] See what?
[1081] C. C. C. C .O?
[1082] C .A. Oh, damn it.
[1083] And so.
[1084] I'm further down.
[1085] I want to explain what time of year, this, or time this was for me. Like this was post -divorce, like, when I'm sort of making up for lost time when it comes to partying, having some fun, whatever.
[1086] Like, I was, I was the buttoned up, like, just did nothing as a kid.
[1087] like didn't drink until I was in college.
[1088] Even then, it was very guarded.
[1089] Did you text him, you up?
[1090] No, I did not do that.
[1091] Did not do that.
[1092] That would have been easier to explain.
[1093] It would have been easier to explain.
[1094] I text him, man, I text him, I'll take half an ounce.
[1095] Oh, my man. There you go.
[1096] And 10 tabs.
[1097] Oh, yes.
[1098] My guy likes to party.
[1099] At the time, I was, I'd done some hallucinogenics, did some LSD, by the way, for those who ever want to do it or talk, like, look, anything you do just do it super responsibly.
[1100] Do it super responsibly.
[1101] I did a little bit, a little bit, little bit.
[1102] All right, you don't do a whole lot.
[1103] Otherwise, maybe you can turn it into Stugats.
[1104] But I sent that to Charlie Kravitz, and holy crap.
[1105] Oh my God.
[1106] Did my stomach just go nuts?
[1107] It could be way worse.
[1108] For like five minutes.
[1109] It could be way worse.
[1110] Charlie Kravitz is like on the list of people that I could just easily be like, my bad.
[1111] Which is why.
[1112] Yeah, but it's still like a work person.
[1113] When you said tabs, you meant Tylenol.
[1114] Ten tablets of Tylenol.
[1115] See, that wouldn't have worked, right?
[1116] Because I asked for a half an ounce.
[1117] What else am I asking for a half an ounce of, right?
[1118] Tequila.
[1119] I just said, no. Tequila and Tylenol still, like, maybe not the best combination.
[1120] I was like, look, if I'm going to send a drug order to one of my producers, I better just make it one drug.
[1121] And then I said, first of all, Charlie, obviously, that wasn't for you.
[1122] You could just be ordering the smallest steak ever.
[1123] like a half -ounce steak to know the tabs I was trying to find the joke of like what could be half -ounce here's where I just crossed my fingers and I said man I hope this dude smokes right because I was like tabs I meant potatoes dabs dabs being a if that was your makeup he did not believe you he he responds that I said first of all that wasn't for you second sorry about the typos just to clear things up.
[1124] I met dad.
[1125] You made it worse.
[1126] Doing too much.
[1127] You made it worse.
[1128] And he responded super nice.
[1129] He was like, oh, that makes much more sense.
[1130] And then said other things about, like, being green friendly or whatever.
[1131] And to this day, I have been wanting to tell him and ask him if he just assumed I was some, you know, the Bill Walton just doing LSD all the time.
[1132] Can we text him and ask him about it?
[1133] Yes, let's do that.
[1134] For sure, he told all his friends about this.
[1135] He's like, you guys won't believe what is he was doing.
[1136] How many people he told.
[1137] I know he didn't tell Dan.
[1138] He definitely told Dominique.
[1139] Did he call him or text?
[1140] Oh, call him on speaker for sure.
[1141] Chris Cody loves a call on air.
[1142] He loves a call on air.
[1143] Hey, Kyle.
[1144] I don't know if he'll answer.
[1145] I've never called him.
[1146] Chris Cody's so excited because now he's not the one doing it.
[1147] I'm going to say, hey, Kyle.
[1148] This is great.
[1149] I've got him being like, hello?
[1150] Yeah, what's up?
[1151] Hey, Kyle.
[1152] You're on mystery crate.
[1153] I think you called the wrong person.
[1154] Oh, are you not the wrong person?
[1155] Oh, are you not the.
[1156] person who Izzy accidentally texted a drug order to?
[1157] Oh, no, that is me. I was actually that's hilarious.
[1158] I was just thinking about that the other day.
[1159] Can you recap the story for us, Charlie, from your angle?
[1160] Yeah, I had just started producing highly questionable.
[1161] And I knew Izzy very tangentially because he had just started hosting the show.
[1162] I don't even know how I had his number saved.
[1163] Yeah, I mean, you probably didn't.
[1164] That was probably the reason why.
[1165] And you sent me like, hey, man, can I pick up a bunch of then tree, tree, tree, tree emojis?
[1166] And then cap, cap, cap emojis at like six today.
[1167] And I was like, wrong number, but tight.
[1168] Did you say cap emojis?
[1169] I think they were capped.
[1170] No, I didn't use any emojis.
[1171] You said an emoji drug order?
[1172] You're a loser.
[1173] I might have used the tree for the weed order, but I don't know if you remember this part, Charlie.
[1174] if you can hear me okay.
[1175] I said, I ordered the weed portion and then I said a number of tabs.
[1176] Tabs.
[1177] I could do.
[1178] Right.
[1179] So that's when I text you back and I said, clearly that wasn't meant for you.
[1180] And I tried to fix my mistakes because, yes, I was ordering tabs of LSD.
[1181] Instead, I tried to convince you that it was dabs.
[1182] Oh, no. I knew.
[1183] That's what I was trying to figure out.
[1184] I was like, can I get away with a typo here?
[1185] Can I Full disclosure?
[1186] I remembered it was tabs But I didn't know if I could say that That's the only reason I'm calling you was to make sure By the way, I'm a very responsible Partier, just so you know Yeah I believe it sounds like it'd be a great time Yeah Thanks Kyle Appreciate you picking up Bye Those 10 tabs are for him and Anthony Over They're not just for a time I honestly don't even think we used them all Because like It is a lot Like, doing LSD is a lot of work.
[1187] Like, you've got to prepare, you got to, it's just too much.
[1188] And I haven't done it since like 2018.
[1189] I like that he still tried to protect you there.
[1190] That's what I love about Charlie.
[1191] He just came up with a totally different text, even though we called him on here.
[1192] Another guy that you can hear smiling when he talks.
[1193] Yes.
[1194] Like Pablo Cori.
[1195] Oh, yeah.
[1196] He could hear the smile.
[1197] Hey, what's up, guys?
[1198] He's like, yeah, I do remember that.
[1199] Crazy.
[1200] Check out the Greg Cody show.
[1201] Yeah.
[1202] With Greg Cody.
[1203] If you ever can't find Stugats, we're probably hanging out.
[1204] I saw that there's a deadheads for Kamala Zoom call on Thursday.
[1205] So Stugats was not at work yesterday.
[1206] I think Joe Burrell will be on that.
[1207] You know why.
[1208] He'll probably smoke some weed and forget about it.