Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend XX
[0] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[1] Want to talk to Conan?
[2] Visit teamcoco .com slash call Conan.
[3] Okay, let's get started.
[4] Hi, Veronica.
[5] Meet Conan and the Chilchots.
[6] Hi.
[7] Hello.
[8] Hi, Soda.
[9] Hi, Matt.
[10] Hi, Conan.
[11] Hi, how are you, Veronica?
[12] I'm so good.
[13] It's so nice to meet you.
[14] It's very nice to meet you.
[15] I'm sensing that you are from a foreign land.
[16] You have a slight accent.
[17] Tell us, were you?
[18] Yes.
[19] Are you coming from someplace else in the world?
[20] Yes, I'm from Hungary.
[21] Are you in Hungary right now?
[22] Yeah.
[23] Oh, what part of Hungary are you in?
[24] I'm in Eger.
[25] It's like a tiny town.
[26] How tiny is tiny?
[27] How tiny is tiny?
[28] It's 50 ,000 people.
[29] Oh, wow.
[30] Okay.
[31] That is a very small town.
[32] So you're in, you say it Egar?
[33] Eger.
[34] Eger.
[35] Am I saying, I want to say it right.
[36] Egan.
[37] Yeah.
[38] EGad.
[39] Yeah.
[40] You're in EGat.
[41] I think so nice.
[42] The closest.
[43] Yeah.
[44] Wow.
[45] Of course, she was also not born in America.
[46] Okay, I was.
[47] I respect other cultures.
[48] Sure, okay.
[49] Now, whatever, you came in when you were eight.
[50] Anyway, Egar, Hungary.
[51] Wow, that's incredible.
[52] I have never been to Hungary.
[53] Tell me, what is it like in Egar in your town?
[54] What's it like to be Hungarian?
[55] Tell us all about it.
[56] Well, we've just been declared another democracy.
[57] Oh.
[58] Oh.
[59] Wait.
[60] I don't know if you guys.
[61] I don't know.
[62] So we are not a democracy anymore.
[63] Yes.
[64] We don't fit the criteria according to.
[65] Oh, right.
[66] Yes.
[67] This was announced.
[68] How recently?
[69] I think last week or two weeks ago.
[70] Right.
[71] And this is decided by, was this decided by United Nations?
[72] The Union, the European Union.
[73] Oh, European Union said that you don't qualify as a democracy.
[74] I have news for you.
[75] I don't think we qualify as a democracy anymore.
[76] No, I don't think so.
[77] I mean, I certainly don't hear that Team Coco either.
[78] No, well, not at Team Coco, certainly.
[79] This is what you call an autocracy.
[80] But no, United States is having its own real problems with democracy.
[81] And we like to think that we helped not invent it, but give it a real boost.
[82] And we were supposed to be a beacon for other democracies.
[83] And we're struggling right now to figure this out.
[84] But, well, yes, you're going through, is it, turbulent where you are right now, or how are people accepting the news?
[85] Are people upset?
[86] Well, I don't really know because it's like a, it's a weird time.
[87] We just had an election.
[88] And then the guy, I don't know if you guys know, Orban, he's the prime minister.
[89] He's like, our Trump.
[90] Everyone seems to have their own Trump.
[91] I mean, you know, it is, it is, yes, it is just a hallmark of humanity that each nation increasingly seems to have their own.
[92] So are you able to speak about this freely?
[93] Are you comfortable talking about it?
[94] Yeah.
[95] Okay.
[96] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[97] But I don't want to bring the conversation down so we don't have to talk about it.
[98] Well, we'll talk about other things, but, you know, I'm sorry that you're going through this turbulent time.
[99] You know, we, you, you know, it's, but it's nice to be able to speak with you.
[100] You know, it's one of the things we like that I like the most about this podcast.
[101] We do two.
[102] We do one where we speak to celebrities and then there's this one where I get to talk to people all around the world is I like, I'm really fascinated by how people are living and I like to hear how they're doing and how they're experiencing life.
[103] So I'm glad that you mentioned that.
[104] But it's fine.
[105] We don't have like revolutions or anything.
[106] It's peaceful.
[107] It's just weird.
[108] Yeah.
[109] It's weird right now.
[110] Well, guess what?
[111] I have news for you.
[112] It's weird everywhere right now.
[113] It's a very, I think it's a weird time for just across the world, humanity.
[114] So, um, but this is also helpful too.
[115] Like, uh, I feel like I'm going to leave this podcast and just read up more on what's happening in Hungary.
[116] Me too.
[117] I felt bad that I didn't know what was happening.
[118] Well, Soner, to be honest, we're right next to Ukraine.
[119] Oh, yes.
[120] Yeah, yeah, I can imagine.
[121] What were you going to say, I'm sorry?
[122] I was going to say you don't seem to know about a lot of things.
[123] Oh, yes, yes, I'm sorry.
[124] You're not wrong.
[125] You're not wrong.
[126] No, you really know a lot about - I thought you were going to insult me. Oh, no, no, no. You know a lot about - Take that as an insult.
[127] He's not wrong.
[128] Ronica, Sona knows very much about different, she knows a lot about reality shows that involve people, what we call hooking up.
[129] Hoking up.
[130] And she's watched every iteration of human cataport.
[131] Yeah.
[132] The human centipede.
[133] Oh, no, I watched human caterpillar.
[134] Oh, you're doubling down on human caterpillar?
[135] Oh, and you know what?
[136] It's not weird at all.
[137] I mean, it's not sexy at all.
[138] I know weird as anything.
[139] That's just the movie where they graphed feet to people's butts.
[140] Exactly.
[141] Multiple feet.
[142] Yeah.
[143] I love human caterpillar.
[144] And I'm waiting for human slug.
[145] Oh, God.
[146] Okay, we got off track here.
[147] This is stupid.
[148] Veronica, tell us, you live in.
[149] this small town and tell us about your life.
[150] Just, we're going to leave politics aside.
[151] Okay, so what?
[152] You're no longer a democracy.
[153] Democracy, schmumocracy, I say.
[154] It's all going to work out in the wash. Tell us what's your life like right now in a human scale?
[155] It's fine.
[156] Are you being held at gun?
[157] Are you at gunpoint right now, Veronica?
[158] Is someone, is someone holding you prisoner?
[159] I have to tell you.
[160] I have to tell you.
[161] I have to.
[162] to tell you something.
[163] So Hungarian people are very sad all the time.
[164] Do you know about like Portugal?
[165] It's not funny.
[166] I don't know why I'm laughing.
[167] Yeah, it's so funny.
[168] Nothing.
[169] That's a real rib -tick with sona.
[170] My people are very sad all the time.
[171] Because you're smiling when you say it.
[172] My people, they're so sad.
[173] I mean, you seem happy, but you're saying, are they sad because when you say they're sad people just laugh at Hungary?
[174] Is that why they're sad?
[175] No, so we're generally not very optimistic.
[176] I guess that's how you say.
[177] Well, that's, yes, I am Irish.
[178] I mean, my people are from Ireland, and we are not optimistic.
[179] We're very gloomy people, and we drink a lot to make up for it.
[180] I don't know what they do.
[181] And you guys, you have, you drink and you have goulash as well.
[182] Don't you have goulash?
[183] Yes, it's a beach food.
[184] It's a what?
[185] Beach food?
[186] A beach food.
[187] Yeah.
[188] Wait, a beach food.
[189] Like you eat it at the beach?
[190] No, no, you don't.
[191] Like nachos?
[192] Yes.
[193] No, goulash is the opposite of beach food.
[194] I'm sorry, Veronica, no one goes to the beach and says, hey, I'm, I worked up a big sweat playing volleyball, now let's break out the goulash.
[195] He has a point.
[196] I'm sorry.
[197] Maybe this is why you guys are so sad.
[198] Yeah, we found out why you're depressed.
[199] Try some ice cream or like a capriced sun.
[200] Yeah.
[201] Do you have those as well?
[202] What?
[203] Also, we have a beach food that it's a donut dough, but it's salty.
[204] It's like the size of a plate.
[205] A salty dough the size of a plate.
[206] Yes, and then we put garlic on it.
[207] Oh, wow.
[208] And then sour cream.
[209] Yep.
[210] This sounds like...
[211] And then we just eat it on the beach.
[212] This sounds like light beach food.
[213] You know what I like to do?
[214] I like to eat a giant salty garlic frisbee.
[215] then have some goulash and then what?
[216] I jump in the water and I drowned.
[217] Make sure you wait 15 hours after eating goulash and a dough frisbee before going in the water.
[218] Oh my God.
[219] Oh my God, Veronica, this is incredible.
[220] What do you eat for like cold winter months?
[221] Just bricks?
[222] Yeah.
[223] Yeah.
[224] Wow.
[225] is amazing.
[226] Now, you know what I love, Veronica, about the podcast, about doing a podcast is that you get, you listen to the podcast in Hungary.
[227] Isn't that cool?
[228] I think I just love that.
[229] Were you familiar with my work prior to the podcast?
[230] Yeah, so, no. It's okay.
[231] It's okay.
[232] It's okay.
[233] You don't have to be ashamed.
[234] It's, we were probably never seen there.
[235] And, you know, I was.
[236] No, we didn't have like late night on TV.
[237] So the only thing, all the things I know about you, it's from the podcast.
[238] Yes.
[239] Okay.
[240] So you know that I'm, you know that I'm a megalomaniac.
[241] Yeah.
[242] No, I am one of the biggest stars in the world.
[243] Wow.
[244] From television, I had a show.
[245] Uh -huh.
[246] Yeah.
[247] Okay.
[248] I'm going to amend what I said.
[249] I'm going to change what I said.
[250] I had a late night show for a number of years and so that's how many people know me but it's interesting that you only know me from this podcast but as long as you know me my ego is satisfied that's good yeah so that's a victory for me I think.
[251] Congratulations.
[252] Yeah, congrats, thank you.
[253] It doesn't bother you at all that you had this whole body of work for 28 years and she doesn't know anything about it.
[254] Well, maybe have you ever watched The Simpsons?
[255] No. Oh my God.
[256] Well, I think this conversation's over.
[257] Oh, the Simpsons that did it.
[258] Yeah, I can't speak to you if you haven't watched the Simpsons.
[259] Have you ever watched any of his online clips from the show, like Sona remotes with Sona and thing?
[260] I watched some interviews.
[261] And then when I found out I'm going to be talking to you, I googled you.
[262] So what I'm hearing is you like Conan, but only if Sona and I are involved.
[263] Well, that's not what I'm hearing at all.
[264] That's not what I'm hearing.
[265] I think you're missing the headline here, Gourley.
[266] The headline here is that she knew nothing, then found out that she was going to be interviewed by me, so she Googled me. How many podcasts do you randomly apply to be on?
[267] You didn't even care.
[268] You were like, I don't.
[269] That's not true.
[270] I don't care.
[271] I listen to every episode.
[272] Okay, well, that's nice.
[273] That's nice, but it's nice that you Google me. I want to tell you a true story, which is sometimes I sit, I'll be invited to a dinner party and I'll sit, be seated with some people I don't know.
[274] And then it becomes very clear to me within minutes that they Googled me on the way to, no, no, it is, no, no. I mean, they knew kind of who I was or whatever, but they'll start saying things.
[275] It's just so funny, they'll just start talking to me in a way and it's clear that they were reading this off of Google, not finding.
[276] minutes ago while they were waiting for the valet to park the car.
[277] I remember when Adam asked me to work on this podcast, I had to Google.
[278] Yeah.
[279] I did too.
[280] Before my first, my interview with you, I googled you.
[281] Okay.
[282] Well, you're all awful people.
[283] It doesn't mean we don't.
[284] No, I'm not kidding.
[285] I really did.
[286] I know all about them.
[287] Because, yeah, okay, yeah, you hosted a show, but you did a lot of other stuff too that I didn't know about.
[288] You didn't know I was a bodybuilder.
[289] Okay.
[290] You didn't know that I was also a successful eye surgeon.
[291] Veronica.
[292] Anyway, we're forgetting about our friend here, Veronica.
[293] Veronica, welcome.
[294] It's okay that you Googled me, and I'm glad that you listened to the podcast, and I'm glad that we're friends.
[295] And tell us about your life, like day -to -day.
[296] Well, I have a question that I know from the notes.
[297] Veronica, you're quite a knitter, is that right?
[298] And did you make that sweater, that beautiful sweater?
[299] Yeah.
[300] Oh, that's very nice.
[301] It's crocheted.
[302] It's a little carnigan.
[303] It's got hearts all over it.
[304] Does that mean you're looking for love or are you already in love?
[305] What's happening?
[306] Well, I am in love, but I just made this because it looked cool.
[307] It is cute.
[308] It is really nice.
[309] Okay.
[310] So that's not a signal, you know, I see.
[311] Okay.
[312] Well, tell us, I'm just curious.
[313] When I wear a lot of hearts, it means I'm desperately looking for love.
[314] Oh.
[315] And then my wife asks me to please take that off.
[316] Yeah, you've been married for like 20 years.
[317] Well, you can Google it.
[318] All right.
[319] Researched.
[320] So who's in your life?
[321] Tell us about this person in your life.
[322] So I just got engaged to my fiancé in April.
[323] Oh, very nice.
[324] Congratulations.
[325] We went to Portugal on a holiday and then he proposed there.
[326] Oh, was it a surprise that he proposed to you?
[327] Yes.
[328] And he tried many times.
[329] What do you mean he tried many times?
[330] I kept accidentally sabotaging him.
[331] What do you mean?
[332] Like, describe what were you doing?
[333] So he started to try and work his way.
[334] into the proposal and then you would say let's go get some goulash or I have a date tonight or I've never loved you I have a date tonight what's uh what's his what's his so his name is Marty Marty and you kept interrupting him yeah so he had a plan to go see a sunset from like a nice park in Portugal and it was supposed to be on the first day when we got there.
[335] He meant they wanted to do it, so, you know, we're tired of a way.
[336] And then I told him, you know, I'm not leaving the hotel because I'm too tired.
[337] So that was the first day.
[338] Okay.
[339] And then the next day, it was the same plan.
[340] And then we went to the park and we wanted to see the sunset.
[341] And we got there around seven.
[342] And then I checked my phone.
[343] And it said that the sunset is at like 9 .30.
[344] So after an hour, I told him that it's just, I'm getting too cold.
[345] So I'm just going back to the hotel.
[346] Oh, my God.
[347] You sound like, well, anyway, you sound like a lot of fun, Veronica.
[348] It's a really fun day.
[349] So did you ever, have you ever seen a sunset in your life?
[350] No. You know, you don't even know what one.
[351] is it goes down below the horizon in the west really i didn't know that uh so did he eventually maybe he needs to give up on the sunset thing and just pop the question yeah he did give up so he just asked me when i started walking away well you know what i think i think you guys are going to be very happy because let me tell you something veronica marriage is all about giving up He just gave up So literally you're walking back to the bus stop And he was like, oh, anyway, maybe we'll get married And he went, sure, let's get out of here You just see a ring in a box Get thrown past you like There it is if you want it At the back of her head Well, he sounds like a very patient man He is very patient Yeah He's a mathematician Oh, really Do you have a question for Conan at all?
[352] Yeah, so about the wedding Yeah, who are you?
[353] Who the fuck are you?
[354] I don't want that in my Google search history.
[355] Sorry, go ahead.
[356] So I was thinking, I found out that I'm going to have to make a speech.
[357] And my question was, how do you write a wedding speech?
[358] Because it just seems like such a big moment.
[359] And I've never had to write a speech ever.
[360] for anything.
[361] And I, I want it to be special.
[362] I want it to be honest.
[363] Also not embarrassing.
[364] Well, I think, first of all, I wouldn't eat any of the food you described before the speech.
[365] Okay?
[366] So no goulash and no giant 15 pound manhole cover of yeast.
[367] And certainly do not give the speech at sunset because you'll never make it.
[368] Yeah, yeah.
[369] But my sincere, You know what I really do believe is sometimes people think speeches need to be long and they don't.
[370] I think the magic of a speech is that it can be quite short and you just be honest.
[371] You know, you love this guy.
[372] And if you speak, and also I'll tell you this, you have a very good sense of humor.
[373] You seem like a really delightfully funny and fun person, despite you're just a terrible person to propose to.
[374] But I think it's low blood sugar around sunset is your problem.
[375] But if I were you, I would just, I bet if you sat down and you thought about what he means to you, what Marty means to you, and what he means and the life that you want together.
[376] And you're honest and you wrote it down.
[377] I think in 10 minutes, you'd have something really lovely.
[378] And that's all it has to be.
[379] I think you don't put too much pressure on it.
[380] And I think that's going to be a lovely speech.
[381] And can you make it funny?
[382] Is that weird?
[383] I can't.
[384] I'm not good at that.
[385] And also, I'm in a union.
[386] I got to get paid.
[387] It's the Writers Guild of America.
[388] But yes, of course you can make it funny.
[389] And I think myself, I mean, we've already ruined it.
[390] But I think if you just told the story of how many times Marty tried to propose to you, that would be really funny and people would laugh.
[391] If you said, I mean, first of all, you can be.
[392] be, you can start out and you can talk about how much it means to you that everyone's come to your wedding, assuming that everyone in town shows up.
[393] What is that?
[394] 50 ,000 people.
[395] No, but if you tell that story, that's a really sweet story.
[396] It really, it's funny.
[397] And then you can end on a sweet note and just talk about what he means to you.
[398] And you have a really good speech right there.
[399] That's what I would do.
[400] Sounds good.
[401] Yeah, it does sound good.
[402] Okay.
[403] Well, send it to me and I'll, I'll punch it up with a couple of jokes.
[404] Yeah, you should write it for her or even say it for her and then film it and then she could just play that at her wedding.
[405] Yeah, and no one in the town will know who this man is.
[406] 50 ,000 phones start Googling.
[407] So just Google will crash.
[408] Your wedding will crash Google.
[409] Suddenly we're getting all these hits for who is Conan O 'Brien in Hungary.
[410] Anyway, Veronica, please.
[411] have a wonderful wedding, and you're going to do very well with your speech.
[412] You really are, and we're very happy for you.
[413] And it's nice to have you as a friend.
[414] It really is.
[415] Thank you so much.
[416] It was so nice to meet you guys.
[417] Nice to meet you, too.
[418] I'm sorry if I said mean things.
[419] Oh, no, no. It's funny.
[420] It's really funny.
[421] It's funny, and you know why it's funny?
[422] Because it's true.
[423] And so that was terrific.
[424] That was good.
[425] So don't you worry about that.
[426] Thank you, Veronica.
[427] Thank you, Veronica.
[428] Bye -bye.
[429] Thank you.
[430] Thank you.
[431] Bye.
[432] Conan O 'Brien needs a fan.
[433] With Conan O 'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Goorley.
[434] Produced by me, Matt Goorley.
[435] Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Solitaireoff, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson at Earwolf.
[436] Music by Jimmy Vivino.
[437] Supervising producer Aaron Blaird.
[438] Associate talent producer Jennifer Samples.
[439] Associate producers Sean Doherty and Lisa Burm, engineered by Will Bechton.
[440] Please rate, review, and subscribe to Conan O 'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.
[441] This has been a team Coco production in association with Stitcher.