Teddy Swims

[0] Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert.

[1] I'm Doug Barrington, and I'm joined by Lily Padman.

[2] Welcome, I'm Lily Padman, and you're Doug Barrington.

[3] I want to be, I want to be...

[4] Doug Lyman?

[5] What if it was Doug Barrington and Doug Lyman?

[6] I want to be Michelle Montana.

[7] Do you know why?

[8] Tell me. Because my first street in L .A. was Barrington Avenue.

[9] Oh, so there's your form...

[10] I didn't live.

[11] I wish I lived off Montana.

[12] Mother, you lie.

[13] No, that's where the rich people lived.

[14] You told me you lived off Montana.

[15] No, I didn't.

[16] I lived off of Broadway, in between Broadway and Santa Monica Boulevard.

[17] Montana's where the nice people live.

[18] I guess I'll be Michelle Broadway then.

[19] There you go, Michelle Broadway.

[20] That sounds slutty.

[21] I grew up on Barrington.

[22] You were Doug Barrington.

[23] Yeah, oh, right, right, right, right.

[24] So I will be Michelle Broadway, Montana, hyphen.

[25] Michelle Broadway.

[26] Okay, great.

[27] We sorted it out.

[28] I wonder if you're a listener.

[29] You're like, you guys.

[30] It's time to hang up.

[31] Just say your names and get out.

[32] No. That would be a fair.

[33] Would that be a fair criticism?

[34] No. Okay, Michelle's got boundaries.

[35] Yes, sure.

[36] And I respect them.

[37] One of her boundaries is Broadway, which runs East and West in Santa Monica.

[38] I wouldn't mind having a...

[39] pseudonym?

[40] Not, what's the other word for it?

[41] Numb de plu is?

[42] No, it's like persona, but...

[43] Alter ego?

[44] Alter ego, thank you.

[45] That's the word I'm looking for.

[46] An alter ego.

[47] Well, you're adding all of them now.

[48] Yes, she's hyphened, hyphenated.

[49] Because she came from a family where the mother refused to give up her name.

[50] The mother was stubborn.

[51] Yeah, so I love her.

[52] I want to be her.

[53] Yeah, okay.

[54] I'm going to be her.

[55] Great.

[56] Michelle Montana Broadway, Broadway, Montana.

[57] This is what happens when you hyphenate people.

[58] Yeah, that's y 'all's fault.

[59] As long as I get both names in there, you should be happy.

[60] No. Yeah, what the order matter?

[61] You're saying one order is better than...

[62] What if we said Dax Shepherd Randall?

[63] Great.

[64] Enjoy.

[65] Okay, I will.

[66] We have a sweet boy on today.

[67] Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet boy.

[68] Yeah.

[69] His name is Teddy Swims, but I think it should be Teddy Sweets.

[70] Oh, yeah, I like that.

[71] He's so sweet.

[72] He's so fucking sweet.

[73] Yeah, this was fun.

[74] It's so talented.

[75] Yeah, outrageous.

[76] Outrageous.

[77] Raw.

[78] You, of course, like everyone else, fell deeply in love.

[79] From his last album, I've tried everything but fair.

[80] among those songs I lose control he's so fucking good but mostly he's a sweet sweet boy please enjoy Teddy Montana Broadway Swims Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair expert early and ad free right now join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts getting a car lift going i see you man that's sick oh thanks for noticing i mean you would understand this is a dream of all dreams i have a fucking car lift in my garage hell yeah brother that's awesome horsepower sitting on it that's what you like to see baby success baby we love to see it i gotta take you in a little bit okay this would be really inappropriate if you were a female guest but i'm gonna let my eyes start at your toes and i'm gonna follow your legs up very very slowly.

[81] I'm going to look at every...

[82] Do a body scan?

[83] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[84] I'm immediately curious who some of these portraits are of.

[85] So let's start on your left leg there.

[86] Who's that gentleman?

[87] Okay, this guy is Chris Farley dressed as Han Solo.

[88] Oh, my God, incredible.

[89] Wonderful, wonderful.

[90] And I got a little Dave Chappelle right here.

[91] Oh, we love him.

[92] He's the best.

[93] Have you met him and got to show him your thigh?

[94] I didn't get to show him to thigh.

[95] I got to go to his Grammy party and he was doing this kind of like open jam thing.

[96] And I got to go up there and sing and it was so sick.

[97] like, man, Thundercat was playing bass.

[98] Cory Henry's on the Keys.

[99] It was the coolest shit ever knew.

[100] Oh, yeah.

[101] Archer Day got up and sang.

[102] It was just star setting over there, man. So I got to go up there and meet him.

[103] Does he make you nervous?

[104] He was already like three sheets to the wind and invite people up.

[105] And he was like, Teddy, everybody says you're awesome.

[106] Let's fucking hear what this is about.

[107] And so I was like, dude, I got a tattoo of you on my leg right here.

[108] I wasn't going to just drop trial in front of him, you know?

[109] Sure, sure.

[110] You got to find out his boundaries at the time, but I was already in my suit.

[111] So it would have been like awful to just look at this, bro.

[112] Yeah.

[113] It would have been a lot of production.

[114] He would have known for a while what was coming.

[115] It's better to have drawstring on and just drop.

[116] Yeah, exactly, baby.

[117] He makes me nervous.

[118] I'm saying that, I haven't even met him, but I know he would make me nervous.

[119] I'm very intimidated.

[120] Yeah, I was thinking I was going to be, I think it was just the environment.

[121] If it was just me meeting him, like, walking into his house or something to do something like this, I would probably be freaking the fuck out for sure, you know, but it was just such a big party going on.

[122] So it was easy to just like, hey, man, and I got called at the stage to sing.

[123] I immediately knew I was going to crush that.

[124] That's the gift you have.

[125] I don't.

[126] I don't have anything to come wow him with, right?

[127] I think the reason he intimidates me. It's anyone that I've labeled so cool.

[128] It's not like talent.

[129] I've met a lot of talented actors, but it's the cool factor.

[130] I'm like, I feel so fucking dorky around this guy.

[131] That's how I felt meeting John Mayer.

[132] That is the coolest fucking guy I've ever met.

[133] He's just cool as hell.

[134] It's like I know a lot of things must bug that guy.

[135] I mean, he's got problems surely, but he just looks like he's just the coolest.

[136] Like, nothing gets by him.

[137] He just looks like he's fucking chill.

[138] And you're talking to him, ask him questions.

[139] I just keep asking questions.

[140] I was like, dude, if I'm wearing you out, please let me know, because I just was like, what about this?

[141] I'll go all night.

[142] How about this record?

[143] Poppy energy.

[144] Yeah, just I could not stop.

[145] No, you got to help me understand because, and this is not shade to John Mayer.

[146] Truly, I think he's talented and everything.

[147] I wouldn't be intimidated at all.

[148] I don't think he was the dude in my high school.

[149] I was like, hey, what are you guys doing after school?

[150] What is it about him?

[151] Is it the career?

[152] Is it the laundry list of A -list dating partners he's had?

[153] What's in the mix?

[154] When I was first coming up playing and singing and stuff, from room for squares on, he's just always been And one of the guys for me, everything he's done, too, has been completely alone.

[155] I'm a huge collaborator when it comes to writing and using my guys write and play.

[156] And he's done everything by himself.

[157] That level of trust you have in yourself to write the good thing and not have any outside opinion and to nail hits after hits after hits.

[158] And never listen to a label to say, oh, we've got to do this more popy or go into this side or pitch you a record to say, how about this little shit pop record, you know?

[159] And he just doesn't seem like he's ever quite given in to anybody else's opinions.

[160] His integrity is just firm.

[161] His conviction and self -confidence is the thing you're doing.

[162] Yeah, it's crazy.

[163] I also find that musicians in particular really do respect him.

[164] He's the musician's musician, the artist's artist, but also has the hits.

[165] Whatever thing about trying to be like a big artist, you can do it the John Mayer way and really never give up your integrity and make things that are good for artists to listen to, singers to listen to, players to listen to, but also still get a number one slot by doing that.

[166] And I think he's what that is for me versus like, I'll take the shitty record.

[167] and I know this is going to be the number one single.

[168] I try to avoid those at all cause and just try to do it the way that makes me feel like my integrity's intact.

[169] The mayor method.

[170] Yeah, the mayor method.

[171] You should write a buck called the mayor method.

[172] But we do have to take what you just said with a grain of salt because we met one time recently.

[173] Yeah.

[174] And you claimed that without a paddle was a seminal movie in your life and that I was very a part of your childhood.

[175] Absolutely, man. So we need to just qualify that.

[176] I think that's a good counterbalance.

[177] Dude, I love you.

[178] And I'm so glad to be doing this.

[179] now too because it came in hot dude as soon as i saw you stand there watching me i was so cool dacks dacks dude i love you bro you're my fucking hero dude i loved it so much because what you were helping me through was i was having a moment where i was like man i am 49 everyone here is young everyone knows what's happening i'm starting to not know what's happening and then i see you and i'm like this motherfucker well there was a great conversation i had and needs to be said this is with another gentleman and he said just wait to you hear him sing, he's going to blow you away.

[180] And then you finished and I was like, my God, you were right.

[181] That just fucking hugged my soul.

[182] Incredible.

[183] So then I'm thinking like, God, I'm so asleep on this genius.

[184] Now, mind you, when I hear the song, I know the fucking song.

[185] I just didn't put it together right away.

[186] And then I'm like in a shame spiral that I'm so disconnected.

[187] And then you came up and you were so kind to me. And I was like, oh, look, I still have a place here.

[188] You actually made my whole night.

[189] I'm glad to hear that.

[190] That makes the world of me. It was really a lovely monitor.

[191] It was a Spotify party.

[192] We were both there.

[193] We were hosting it.

[194] I have no excuse to be out of the loop, so I'm embarrassed for sure.

[195] But I was like, I don't know him.

[196] And then you started singing, and we were both like, oh, my God.

[197] Yes, that's just good.

[198] It actually fills you with deep shame that you're not on to it.

[199] I'm glad to hear that, but that's not the shame part.

[200] I love that.

[201] I'm grateful that there's always ways to get out there.

[202] And, you know, you hear it firsthand.

[203] And I think that's the most beautiful thing that we try to do is just every place we can be, whether it's a 200 cap or anywhere.

[204] Yeah, we were like 12 feet away.

[205] If we wanted to rush the stage and stab you or something, you were very vulnerable to our attack.

[206] We were very close.

[207] Yeah, I was quite moved by the whole thing.

[208] And I'm just like you, I will go out and let it rip on people.

[209] If I see someone I like, I'm like, buckle up.

[210] If I'm too much for somebody, then they're just not for me, is what I think.

[211] I come on hard and strong and fast.

[212] And I'm just like, I love you.

[213] One thing I've been trying to learn in my love life is to not do that.

[214] You kiss me once?

[215] Are we in love forever?

[216] I've had to stop doing that.

[217] That's been a long learning lesson, but, you know, we take it as slow in the current relationship of a minute.

[218] It's been really rewarding.

[219] I think there'll be an explanation for that as we walk through your whole life.

[220] Yeah, probably.

[221] I can relate, big time.

[222] Georgia, you're with a fellow.

[223] I'm from Georgia.

[224] Oh, right on.

[225] Where from?

[226] Duluth.

[227] Yeah, a lot of my homies are from Duluth.

[228] You know Duluth.

[229] I sure do.

[230] I've been constructing a mental image of it for the last 10 years we've been friends.

[231] I have yet to go, but I've heard so many details.

[232] Is it a haven of malls?

[233] There's a good amount of malls.

[234] A lot of them have shut up.

[235] down during a pandemic and stuff, and I think someone making this way back.

[236] I'm actually going back on Friday.

[237] My aunt's getting married and Monticello.

[238] It's going to be hilarious wedding, so she's marrying this lady, and I'm ordaining the wedding, and I'm going to be doing it on the dock, and I think they're rolling up on a jet ski.

[239] Oh, this sounds like something like of...

[240] It's going to be...

[241] It's going to be white trash.

[242] Yeah, it's an absolute white trash wedding.

[243] It's going to be sick.

[244] Anytime the bride and bride arrive on a jet ski, you're seeing something special.

[245] Steam pump theme, they said.

[246] I don't know what the fuck I'm going to wear.

[247] What does that even mean?

[248] Yeah, how does one dress?

[249] for steampunk.

[250] I mean, Rob would have a great answer.

[251] What should he be in?

[252] Suspenders, leather pants.

[253] But it's like gears and stuff.

[254] Mechanical things added to that.

[255] Yeah, yeah.

[256] Almost Mad Maxie.

[257] Yeah, yeah, that kind of thing.

[258] Oh, that'll be fun.

[259] Have you started writing the, not your nuptials, but your ceremony?

[260] No, but I got to call her eventually and ask like, what do you want to do?

[261] Are you just trying to fly through this thing?

[262] Or do you help me to do some scripture or something?

[263] Because you never know.

[264] Sometimes people want, even if they're not Christian, they want some Jesus -y part of it.

[265] Now, listen, I'm going to advise you to prepare basically two versions of this because you have to account for the fact that there's at least a 15 % chance.

[266] One of them will sustain a pretty serious injury pulling up to the dock because jet skis are highly unpredictable and they often end in failure.

[267] So you need to have one that's like, let's get this done because the ambulance is waiting.

[268] And then you need one that's, they made the perfect entrance.

[269] They docked it beautifully.

[270] It didn't tip over.

[271] No one's wet.

[272] Let's settle in.

[273] And we're probably going to have the cut from the video where I'm trying to pull them up on this.

[274] Yeah, you might want to wear life preserver as part of your steampunk routine.

[275] Maybe it make it look like a bulletproof vest or something.

[276] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[277] You know, try to go for that kind of look.

[278] 50 cents slash, wow, buoyancy compensator.

[279] Oh, man. Okay, so tell me about Conyers, Georgia.

[280] Oh, man, I wouldn't say it's a beautiful place, but it's my place.

[281] I love it there.

[282] And I went to school called Salem and was a big theater kid.

[283] Our place was really tight -knit.

[284] My mom, my dad, both sides of my grandparents, my great -grandparents, all from Conyers, there's this one little diamond of area.

[285] And my grandparents, my mom's mom and dad, who are Pentecostal Passers, live right there.

[286] That's the south side of the diamond for the yeah, yeah.

[287] And then on the north side of the diamond, there was actually my mom's granny's church that they used to go to.

[288] And then my granddad's church was, you know, a little ways down the road.

[289] And so all around the sides here are like my granddad's, like brothers and sisters, daughters and kids outside of the diamond.

[290] There's another kind of diamond around it.

[291] My whole family's right there.

[292] Wow.

[293] So you're surrounding the whole area.

[294] Yeah.

[295] And so I always live with my dad as much as I possibly could, because he was in, like, Covington or something.

[296] And every time you do anything wrong, there was, like, 40 people just like...

[297] Someone could see you in every corner of the county.

[298] What kind of population are we talking about?

[299] I could tell you the population.

[300] I don't know about...

[301] Rob without.

[302] I would tell you that there was times in my life where you can't throw a rock far enough without hitting a curbo or Demsdale in that town, because we have generations.

[303] So I would have to do, like, family trees to date somebody, you know what I mean?

[304] Yeah, oh, God.

[305] Sure, sure, sure.

[306] 23 of me posted on your chest.

[307] It's scary, yeah.

[308] We're thinking that down.

[309] 18 ,000.

[310] 18 ,000.

[311] Okay, because it's only 24 miles east of Atlanta, but was it rural?

[312] The older I got, the more it became more suburban -y in a way.

[313] But when I was younger, I remember my grandparents having chickens and stuff like that and their small yard.

[314] But over the years, more people came in.

[315] And it's right next to Covington, too, which is a little further east.

[316] And Covington, over the last few years, has been doing a lot of filming.

[317] And Tyler Perry is kind of the one that spearheaded all that stuff.

[318] And then Vampire Diaries and a bunch of things started getting.

[319] And so Covington's becoming this huge.

[320] place of filming.

[321] That's so weird if like Highland, Michigan, the town next to mine became a hotbed of Hollywood activity, I would have a hard time understanding that.

[322] But I think in Georgia there's a bunch of tax.

[323] In fact or something.

[324] Yeah.

[325] So mom and dad were they married?

[326] They divorced when I was probably three or so.

[327] So I don't remember them quite together.

[328] As we're talking now, they've weirdly been like kind of dating again weirdly as I'm 31.

[329] Yeah.

[330] And it's been really weird.

[331] It's gross, right?

[332] Yeah.

[333] They came to our show in Vegas together and then they called me on the phone.

[334] And he's like, baby, it's probably weird hearing us together.

[335] And I was like, Dad, I don't know how I feel about it.

[336] If it makes you happy.

[337] And he's like, is there one thing to say if I'm just hitting it?

[338] And I'm like, that's way worse, dude.

[339] That's the way worse, right?

[340] Well, I don't know.

[341] We've got to really think this is through.

[342] No, that's wrong.

[343] Whatever makes you guys happy.

[344] But I'm not trying to parent trap you guys or anything.

[345] So, fuck that.

[346] I'm the same.

[347] So my dad loved when I was three, but they remained really great friends.

[348] And they'd be together.

[349] And even occasionally, if they were being mildly affectionate, I'd be like, guys, don't even think about going back down that road.

[350] Why?

[351] It's a weird, gross feeling.

[352] It's like your brother and sister are going to get to...

[353] I don't know.

[354] Yeah, it's weird.

[355] It doesn't seem natural.

[356] It doesn't.

[357] It was always just yelling about this or that forever.

[358] And so, like, they always kind of just despised each other in a way.

[359] You don't have to name names, but does someone get sober in this equation?

[360] None of them have really ever had, like, a big drinking issue or nothing like that.

[361] So that's been great.

[362] My mom was married to a guy from the time I was, like, four to about 18, who was a massive alcoholic and had dad and dad's dad and mom.

[363] They were a big line of alcoholics, but my parents, they'll say.

[364] smoke some weed here and there.

[365] My dad would get down every once in a while.

[366] As needed.

[367] Yeah, I've never had alcohol abuse within my parents.

[368] Oh, that's lucky.

[369] Yeah, that's really beautiful for me. You had a lot of church, obviously, between the grandparents, all me in.

[370] Yeah, but on my dad's side, it was never that way, which was great.

[371] On the weekends, I'd go over there and we could do whatever.

[372] We could eat all the ice cream as we want.

[373] I mean, we was watching Martin, my favorite show?

[374] I got a picture of Jerome back here on my...

[375] Yeah, was dad right?

[376] He's my everything.

[377] Was dad spending money differently than mom?

[378] Because, like, we'd go to my dad's on the weekend.

[379] He drove a Corvette.

[380] He had cable TV, we could order pizza.

[381] It was like he was rich, even though he wasn't.

[382] It was very tough on my pop side.

[383] My mom, she was with a guy who was pretty well off.

[384] He was gone all the time working.

[385] But my dad, on the other hand, he got with a woman who's schizophrenic and bipolar and had two more boys that are eight and ten years younger than me. And so she was always in and out of prison and meth out.

[386] And that was really tough on them.

[387] And so me and my older brother helped my dad raise my two little ones.

[388] And he was always waking up at like 2 a .m. going to bed at 10 p .m., trying to do home.

[389] work by himself.

[390] My dad is truly the greatest man I've ever met.

[391] Oh, that's lovely.

[392] He put these four boys on his back and just chucked through it.

[393] Oh, man. How much older is your brother?

[394] He's about 14 months older than me?

[395] Okay, so really close.

[396] Yeah, he's my best friend.

[397] He lives out here with me now.

[398] And so growing up, what kids were you in the social hierarchy of that world?

[399] I've always just kind of gotten along with everyone.

[400] I've always been that way.

[401] You have a very sweet face.

[402] It's the opposite of punchable faces.

[403] We're familiar with punchable face?

[404] You have the opposite.

[405] I just always been able to get along with anybody and everybody, you know.

[406] It's just been easy for me. And was your older brother bigger than you?

[407] They're all bigger than me. My shortest little brother is, I think, still 5 '10, but the rest of my family is in six foot.

[408] I got stuck at 5 '7.

[409] Well, I bet you got the singing thing, so it all comes out in the wash. Was your brother protective of you?

[410] Absolutely, man. All of us.

[411] When I first had this thing picking up and going off, we'd started our merchandise business and I just employed my older brother to do it because it was kind of like he didn't really get to start a life until just this last couple years when my little brothers got older, because as I was going doing this, and my dad was trying to put my little brothers through high school, Kaelin, my oldest brother, was their mother for so long.

[412] He had to kind of take care of all of us in a lot of ways.

[413] While you're surrounded by sweet men, that's not always the case.

[414] Women, on the other hand, have been a little treacherous.

[415] I think I've continued to pick those.

[416] It's such a different thing than what a lot of people go through because I have loving, gentle, hugging, kissing men in my life, not so much that way with women in my life.

[417] Your stepdad, would he fall into the great or not great category?

[418] He's an awful person.

[419] Okay.

[420] I loved him when I was younger, but he was just an alcoholic, and he was gone all the time, and he was working, and he's really abusive in ways, and I haven't heard from him since.

[421] He raised me from 4 to 18.

[422] He was a second dad to me, you know, and one day he was just gone for my life, and my mom's life and all of our lives.

[423] I'd never talk to him again, and I do carry some resentments in ways towards him because he was a part of my life for so long, and then he was just gone.

[424] And I was just like, how do you raise somebody, and I know you and my mom split up, but no, like, hi, buddy, or I love you, this isn't your fault.

[425] Just abandonment.

[426] Yeah, I think it really did.

[427] It fucked me up.

[428] I still think of that sometimes.

[429] Well, you start rewriting the entire history, right?

[430] Which is like, oh, he was only ever nice to me because of mom.

[431] Now he doesn't have mom, so none of that was sincere or genuine.

[432] But also, you're smart enough to know you lost him to addiction.

[433] At some point in your life, you might even have compassion.

[434] Yeah, I know as I'm on the road and how easy it is to fall into this spell of just drinking every day.

[435] And last year, all year long, when we was on tour for nine months, it was almost like a nine -month bender of just anything to keep this dopamine flow going.

[436] That's been the hardest thing for me this year is as we've been touring and trying to like get to this point of staying calm and being able to like, okay, we don't need all these people in the greenway.

[437] We don't need a constant party every day.

[438] We don't need this dopamine.

[439] And I was talking to Bert Kreisher the other day about this reentry thing because we got really into this thing about when you get back from tour.

[440] And I just got back like a week or two ago and I find the first couple days I'm home, it being kind of depressing.

[441] And I just get in this place and my babies had to be like, you're not sad.

[442] You're just used to this level of dopamine that hits you when you're in front of thousands of people.

[443] and you can't sleep.

[444] Adrenaline junkie you turn into.

[445] And then so when you get home and you're not getting this constant affirmation, like, yeah, you're the best.

[446] You're kind of getting this like, shit, man, I don't know.

[447] Am I okay?

[448] You're getting this turmoil spot.

[449] It's so easy to feel like, well, I know how to regulate.

[450] And I have to try to do things like get sun, go to the gym, try to get my life back into order for a week or two and try to get a routine going again, but then you're back.

[451] Get stable and then do it all over again.

[452] I'm grateful, though, the best job in the world.

[453] You're like coming off of cocaine, but you don't have.

[454] any downers.

[455] And you're just in your hotel room.

[456] So it's like, what are we going to do with all this?

[457] That's just the feeling.

[458] And then you're laying there until 3 a .m. And even if you've got to get up at 6 a .m. to go radios, you're like, I can't turn this adrenaline off.

[459] And there's always a mini bar to start tapping into or something to get you a little bit more tired.

[460] That's just a tough thing to do.

[461] I try to do the first two or three weeks of this last Europe tour, sober and bring my PlayStation and just get something to focus my brain into.

[462] Because there's always Kyle from the second grade somewhere.

[463] And he happens to be in like Manchester.

[464] And you're like, what are you you doing here.

[465] We got to get hammered tonight.

[466] Of course.

[467] It's always one and it's tough.

[468] And then for me, the justifications became more and more preposterous.

[469] Yeah.

[470] You know, like, yeah, they were kind of legit at first.

[471] And then it was just like, I mean, it's almost 11 -16, whatever the thing is.

[472] But it's chemical.

[473] That high, the drop of being on stage and having all those people, it's an actual chemical drop.

[474] They're just like, oh, that sounds hard.

[475] But it's physiological.

[476] Absolutely.

[477] Of course you feel that way.

[478] It's not weird.

[479] that you do.

[480] It's your chemicals, all of ours.

[481] Well, and it all makes sense when you look back at how almost, I don't know, be careful with my wordage here, but every performer I loved growing up was struggling with it.

[482] Oh, yeah, absolutely.

[483] I don't know the one that was like the Billy Crystal of rock and roll who somehow was doing it from a healthy place.

[484] Maybe.

[485] We don't know.

[486] And managed it beautifully.

[487] Yeah, maybe, but he was like going to play flea tag at the end of the show with his friends.

[488] You know what I mean?

[489] He was going and partying.

[490] Oh, maybe Paul McCartney.

[491] He seems to be the guy who escaped.

[492] He's still with it.

[493] I'm sure he's.

[494] had his time.

[495] Even these ones you didn't think.

[496] Like Prince and Michael Jackson both OD.

[497] They both died of drug overdoses.

[498] However you want to qualify it, well, he had an opiate prescription.

[499] Oh, he was just trying to go sleep.

[500] Whatever the cases, like these are two men who died.

[501] I think the more I do it, the more I realize, like, oh, that's why we're all alcoholics and drug addicts.

[502] That's why we can become that so easy.

[503] Yeah.

[504] So my probably number one guy I love is Wayne Jennings.

[505] And also my fantasy of his life is number one, which is on the road, up for six days on speed, writing music, playing for people, sweating bullets.

[506] And everyone in his life's being let down, but the music's so good, they all overlook it.

[507] I was like, I got to figure out something I do good enough that everyone will let me live as shitty as I want, not kick me to the curve.

[508] I missed Waylon Jennings a lot when I was coming up.

[509] I didn't quite come up on a lot of his stuff or his life or that matter, but I definitely could understand that feeling.

[510] That's what I thought I was doing with this.

[511] career originally was like, I thought I could just be a degenerate all the time.

[512] And now it's like when you got a 3 a .m. lobby call to get to a radio station, I'm like, what the fuck is this?

[513] I did not sign up to music to do this bullshit.

[514] I wanted to stay out till 3.

[515] I wanted to be up till 9 a .m. and then sleep till 4 p .m. and hit sound check.

[516] That's what the vibe was, what I was walking into, but it's not that.

[517] You can't avoid adulthood with anything you do, I don't think.

[518] Yeah, once you're inside the fancy, you're like, oh, this isn't quite how I pictured it.

[519] It's beautiful, but it's like, fuck, man, I just got to wake up and feel like shit or wake up make sure I don't feel like shit.

[520] I would argue, too, your specific story is a very extreme example of it, too, as far as like the highs and lows.

[521] We're only one year out from lose control coming out.

[522] Yeah, it's like a week from now or something?

[523] Yeah.

[524] Doing well, making baby steps, baby steps, getting closer, getting closer.

[525] And then the floodgates, most listen to Song of the Year.

[526] Obama's favorite song.

[527] Yeah, that was sick.

[528] Oh, my God.

[529] That was such a cool moment for me. What?

[530] I was lit up about that.

[531] Yeah, I made his little playlist.

[532] It was so sick.

[533] That song just goes to show you how the old way of doing something still works.

[534] Because I have thought for so long that maybe a good song wasn't enough to just go anymore.

[535] Because there's like 100 ,000 songs come out a day on Spotify, right?

[536] A lot of these are backed up by trends via TikTok, Instagram, whatever have you.

[537] And when those trends start to happen, those songs start to hold up their hand.

[538] And it does make the playing field very even.

[539] If 15 -year -old can record it in his bed and do what I could never do when I was 15 or what I could do even now.

[540] So I think it's a beautiful way of even in the playing field.

[541] But when I look at that song in particular, it's not been a flash in the pan and it's been not backed by a trend, but also us going to every place and touring on this song for over a year and hitting every radio station and shaking every hand and asking them to play it and meeting and bringing them to the show, having a drink with this guy from the radio station, making great friends with them and working the song.

[542] And you could still work it that way.

[543] The promo is so important.

[544] Meeting those people are so important because the next song, they're like, that's my boy, Teddy.

[545] I want that guy to win.

[546] And whether the song is trash or good, it has to be good to some degree, I'm sure.

[547] But I think now when you make those connections and when you go over the UK five times, six times in a year and you meet all those people, when you shake all those hands and even your label people, you're not just a name that slides across their desk to them.

[548] That's my dog, I want to win.

[549] And when you get that real personal connection with people, then I think that will always take you further in life.

[550] I would find it more satisfying if I were you as well that it wasn't even in a genre that's working at number one.

[551] It's not like you listen to it and you're like, yeah, that's the one that'll catch on.

[552] It's not resembling any of the other top.

[553] It just went last week, number one on R &B radio.

[554] It's already been number one on pop radio and it's number one on Billboard and rock radio it's worked at and every different place it can be.

[555] Okay, but back to Conyers.

[556] You were playing football as a little guy and then you eventually discovered musical theater or theater in 10th grade?

[557] Yeah, 10th grade I got in.

[558] But who were you socially?

[559] Everyone kind of liked you, you were a good time, Charlie?

[560] Yeah, absolutely.

[561] Did girls like you yet?

[562] I was always nervous about that.

[563] I had a bunch of girls that were friends.

[564] And I was always kind of like a serial dater where I was just jumping into a relationship and then being that for two, three years and then jump right into another one.

[565] And I kind of did that for a lot of my life.

[566] Starting in one grade.

[567] My first one I got serious about was ninth grade.

[568] We were together for, I think, two, three years.

[569] That's a long time in high school, yeah.

[570] We were broken up for like all the three days when I got into another one for like another three years.

[571] That was insane.

[572] It's been that way, except for where I'm currently at, I took months off before I dove back into something because I've just been that way.

[573] Like, oh, I love you.

[574] I can't help it.

[575] I fall in love so quick.

[576] Now, do you, well, we'll get to that, I guess.

[577] But when you start doing musical theater, you do Joseph in the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

[578] Yeah, the first one we ever did actually was a show called Damn Yankees.

[579] So me and my best pal, Jesse, who still plays with me. His dad was a guitarist and sang, and their whole family was big into music.

[580] And when I first started hanging out with him, I was the first time I ever saw somebody play and sing.

[581] He was in his basement, and he had this PA set up, and he started singing, Won't it did override.

[582] And I was like, dude, your dad is badass, bro.

[583] Seen a million faces.

[584] Yeah, it's so sick, bro.

[585] So me and Jesse started playing all the time, and we sucked so bad originally.

[586] What age is this?

[587] 13, we were coming right out of eighth grade.

[588] We get dropped off at the movie theater and take that 20 bucks our parents gave us and not go to the movies, do what you would think 14 -year -olds do with $20.

[589] We just sit out there and sing.

[590] Acapella trying to harmonize.

[591] Trying to sing for anybody that let us sing.

[592] His sister got us in a theater when I was in 10th grade.

[593] And I remember still to this day, I was doing that damn Yankee show.

[594] And I had two lines, I think, in it.

[595] My mom was crying so bad when I told her, I was like, I don't want to play football anymore.

[596] I'm done to football.

[597] She pulled out all this old memorabilia, you know, where she had the magnets and all my trophies.

[598] And she was like, where would you do this to us?

[599] We'd play football.

[600] Oh, wow.

[601] Was your brother playing football?

[602] Well, my older brother, he'd ever played.

[603] So I guess we're not all playing football.

[604] Why do you suppose that was an important endeavor for her?

[605] I don't know.

[606] My dad did and my other brothers did.

[607] It's a southern thing.

[608] And we always did since I was a little kid, since I've been like five.

[609] She watched me on the football field.

[610] But do you think she was worried about you missing out on the teammate experience?

[611] I'm trying to imagine what it is she thought football was giving you.

[612] I think it was the fear of change that I was going to do something else.

[613] But it wasn't until I did that first show and I sang my two little lines.

[614] And I get out and my mom was like, baby, I'm so sorry.

[615] That's where you belong.

[616] Oh, she flipped.

[617] Yeah, she flipped so sick.

[618] All she had to see me was on stage.

[619] Two lines.

[620] And just be like, wow, baby, you go for it.

[621] That's good.

[622] She was the sweetest after that.

[623] Oh, good.

[624] You want her right over.

[625] Yeah, right over.

[626] And then you start singing in the chorus in high school?

[627] Yeah, funny enough, my senior year, I was kind of really falling behind.

[628] I was such a bad student.

[629] And we had this credit recovery thing where you would go in class and you could do a few weeks of online bullshit and get your credits there.

[630] So I found this thing called Alpha Omega and Conyers.

[631] And it's basically you go pick up work every week.

[632] week for like eight weeks and you'd read a chapter and you can pretty much google all the answers do the test on the back and then turn it in you get credit so i went over one summer going into my senior year did all my senior courses and all my credits i was behind because i was still practically in 10th grade going in the senior year so i was like okay if i just do all these i can come back and not have to do anything but theater smart so i'd already had my credits and so i remember the principal calling in the office and talking to my mom and she was like i'm not signing off on this you just coming in here to do theater, chorus, show choir, and video production.

[633] That's not going to happen.

[634] You can't do that.

[635] And I was like, well, I already got the credits.

[636] So I am doing that.

[637] So that's what I'm doing.

[638] Yeah.

[639] And she's like, well, I'm still kidding you in the classes.

[640] And I was like, well, I'm not doing.

[641] And so I stayed all my core classes.

[642] My senior year just didn't go to it.

[643] I got zero.

[644] I graduated at the bottom of my class.

[645] But I did graduate.

[646] So fuck her, you know.

[647] Yeah, you did it.

[648] Because she couldn't say I couldn't do that.

[649] But they passed a law in Rockdale County now that they can't do joint enrollment in places.

[650] I think I ruined it for some of the kids that were getting college credit.

[651] And maybe for the best.

[652] Stay tuned for more firearm -chair expert, if you dare.

[653] What's up, guys?

[654] It's your girl Kiki, and my podcast is back with a new season, and let me tell you, it's too good.

[655] And I'm diving into the brains of entertainment's best and brightest, okay?

[656] Every episode, I bring on a friend and have a real conversation.

[657] And I don't mean just friends.

[658] I mean the likes of Amy Polar, Kell Mitchell, Vivica Fox, the list goes on.

[659] So follow, watch, and listen to Baby.

[660] This is Kiki Palmer on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast.

[661] We've all been there.

[662] Turning to the internet to self -diagnose our inexplicable pains, debilitating body aches, sudden fevers and strange rashes.

[663] Though our minds tend to spiral to worst -case scenarios, it's usually nothing, but for an unlucky few, these unsuspecting symptoms can start the clock ticking on a terrifying medical mystery.

[664] Like the unexplainable death of a retired firefighter whose body was found at home by his son, except it looked like he had been cremated, or the time when an entire town started jumping from buildings and seeing tigers on their ceilings.

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[668] Follow Mr. Ballin's Medical Mysteries wherever you get your podcasts.

[669] Prime members can listen early and ad -free on Amazon Music.

[670] Did you have any fantasies about like going to do musical theater?

[671] Yeah, I still one day want to pursue that again eventually, but I've kind of put myself in a box on roles I can play.

[672] With the tattoos.

[673] Yeah, it's got to be a specific role now if it comes to acting again.

[674] I was thinking that.

[675] Well, when did tattoos start?

[676] I got my first one when I was 16.

[677] I got it covered up.

[678] It was a cross, and I had my last name in a bander.

[679] It said, Demsdale, and it said established 1992.

[680] It was so corny, bro.

[681] And I cutting the sleeves off my shirt.

[682] like yeah dude by the time i was 18 i was like what the fuck this is so stupid it's not that i don't think kids should get tattoos it's just that they can't pick a good one i'd almost sign off on it but they need like a panel of elders that approves your tattoo i agree and not that i'm the one to take advice of tattoos from but i think 16 year old might be too early kind of the first one you see you're like that look awesome doesn't really matter what it is you see and i thought i was having to cross in my name and like you know i was like you really thought it through yeah I tried anyway, but I just wanted something.

[683] You know what's cute, Monica, I heard him saying in an interview that what he wanted to be when he grew up was tattooed.

[684] That was a destination.

[685] Yeah, and I wasn't a real job, obviously, doing tattoos as one.

[686] Receiving them.

[687] I remember my mom used to give us $10 at the end of the week when we did our chores for the week.

[688] And so on Sunday, we'd have to go to church, and then we'd have to give 10 % of our ties and offerings, which is a good thing.

[689] And I appreciate that principle now, but giving up a dollar out of $10, I was like, I was like, fuck, I'm broke now.

[690] And my older brother would always get $5 because he's a fucking overachiever.

[691] Wow.

[692] Yeah, what a weedy.

[693] I would go to the Mexican restaurant every Sunday or Henderson's and they have those fake tattoo machines and I put them cordon in and just cash out, slap them, stand in the mirror all over my body.

[694] Feeling awesome.

[695] Yeah.

[696] And did you feel protected by them?

[697] Like, what was the draw?

[698] I know, I just felt tough.

[699] All the people I looked up to had tattoos and they were badasses.

[700] My first concert I went to and found this bug for was 2007 Warp Tour.

[701] Paramour was there.

[702] I probably was there.

[703] Yeah.

[704] He was there.

[705] I was Coheed in Cambria.

[706] There were so many great bands at the time that were just my world.

[707] And what actors did you think were cool?

[708] Adam Sandler is my fucking dude.

[709] Not Jack Black.

[710] Jack Black is my dude, too.

[711] But Adam Sandler is, I mean, I guess that's quite fantastic, Billy Madison tattoo, and Carl Weathers from Charles Peterson from Happy Gilman right here.

[712] My dad raised me on nothing but Adam Sandler and Martin Lawrence and Chris Farley and S &L cast.

[713] You want to know a trip, Teddy.

[714] The CEO of Ford right now is Chris Farley's cousin.

[715] No way.

[716] Jim Farley, and we interviewed him, and it's uncanny.

[717] Yeah, they're so similar.

[718] I was tripping out thinking at times I was talking to Chris.

[719] I think that blood really runs thick.

[720] Very specific.

[721] Yeah, I just recently listened to the book, the Chris Farley show, his brother's got together and wrote, and it's beautiful if you haven't ever read it.

[722] Oh, I haven't.

[723] Oh, it's about his whole life.

[724] The ending of it is just the last words he says in his life is just so sad.

[725] He's been up for four days.

[726] His prostitute is leaving his hotel, and he goes after her, and he collapsed.

[727] and then she takes his watch and stuff and leaves him a note.

[728] And the last thing he says to her before she goes is, please don't leave me. And then they find him dead like the next evening.

[729] Yeah.

[730] Yeah, such deep loneliness.

[731] God, it's so sad.

[732] I mean, especially if you were struggling.

[733] His story would just have you in absolute tears.

[734] It's so powerful and sad.

[735] Yeah, it is.

[736] There's a lot of things in that stew.

[737] It's not just addiction.

[738] It's also these highs and lows we're talking about.

[739] This kind of untenable high of public adoration.

[740] And then, yeah, loneliness, and then an ability to connect with anybody, but also not being with anybody ever.

[741] That's so much of it, too, is that ability to always want to please and want to be around.

[742] And as soon as people are around, you've got to make them comfortable, but then you kind of feel more alone in a lot of those rooms, too, where you're just, or it's turning it off and turning it off.

[743] It's the biggest thing I struggle with, too, is that there's times I'm like, oh, fuck, I can't deal with all these people, you know?

[744] But as soon as I do, it's always the turning it on is the hard part.

[745] But once I'm on, it's like, how I'm going to get this off?

[746] There's just this black and white things going on all the time in your brain.

[747] There's no in -between.

[748] It's just on or off.

[749] What kind of things were you struggling with as a kid in high school?

[750] Sounds like you had friends.

[751] You fucking finagled this school system.

[752] You're performing.

[753] You got a good dad.

[754] A lot of what I struggled with is a lot of stuff with my mother.

[755] And I want to live with my dad.

[756] And I don't want to like, I don't know if I'm ready to quite talk about certain things with my mother and her man. She married and that whole side of the family.

[757] It's not something I really publicly spoke about.

[758] And I don't know if my mom would be like.

[759] Yeah, you don't want to hurt your mom.

[760] Yeah.

[761] But we went through a big really talk.

[762] tough time.

[763] And with her decisions she made with that man. And I had to get out of there.

[764] And there was a lot of times where they were doing fine.

[765] But I'd rather live with my dad and struggle in the hood and raise my brothers.

[766] And there was always a love there that I was getting.

[767] Love was so much more than just this fake picture of what a beautiful house and a beautiful life looks like.

[768] I think there was a lot of it to in regards to my upbringing and church and seeing the inside and outs of it.

[769] A lot of smoke and mirrors to it.

[770] Not that my granddad was ever not who he said he was.

[771] There was also some things about it.

[772] That was so strong like, this is right and this is wrong.

[773] There's no gray areas.

[774] and the way he believed everything was right.

[775] And if you didn't believe it exactly how he believed it, the way he believed it, then you were just wrong and you were going to hell.

[776] Right.

[777] It wasn't just a disagreement.

[778] It was you're amoral and you're going to end up in hell because of this difference.

[779] Yeah, and if you don't believe it, just like he did.

[780] I mean, he was headstrong so much that he wouldn't even go to a restaurant where there was a bar in it.

[781] He had a wood shop.

[782] He would never take money from the church as a pastor.

[783] He's like, we don't do that.

[784] He was working on building houses.

[785] He was a carpenter.

[786] He had to be exactly what he read Jesus was.

[787] And sweet man, but if it wasn't this way, I remember one of the first things he said to me He wanted me to come sing at the church When I really started getting music And he was like, all these kids out here nowadays Break dancing and hip -popping and all that for the Lord And I was like, Pop, nobody's broke dancing Since my mom was growing up dog We're not breakdancing for the Lord I was over breakdancing for the Lord Let them break dance for the Lord, man It's not a sin It's not bad to do rap songs for Jesus If they want to do that, let them kids do that.

[788] I mean the songs will probably be bad But there's nothing wrong with it And my mom was always thinking I was up to something I knew that came from a place of her just trying to seem like she was perfect, but also she was a pastor's kid.

[789] And now that I'm older, I'm like, oh, you were a fucking wild one.

[790] And you were thinking I was doing shit that I was not even doing.

[791] She was thinking I was into all sorts of drugs at like 12 that I was like, mom, I don't even know anybody that does that.

[792] I haven't even seen anybody doing crack in front of me. What do you think I'm doing?

[793] Delling my window shut, like, oh, I know what you did.

[794] You snuck out, you jumped down here, you jumped off the roof, and you, I'm like, no, mom, I'm just walking out the front door if I'm going anywhere.

[795] I got into boozing way too early.

[796] When I was at my mom's, They had a bar downstairs, you know, my stepdad had, and I could just go in there and kind of fill up a water bottle.

[797] I had been probably drinking since I was, like, 10, just slugging them back on the bus, you know, and being a little hammered at school, and I'm like, in seventh grade, and we're like, what comfort did it give you?

[798] The only time I was really optimistic in life was when I had booze in me. When I think about why I started drinking or why I started smoking cigarettes, it was truly to be cool, you know?

[799] And that was all there was to it.

[800] I just wanted to be cool, and I was hanging out with these kids, and they were smoking weed, and I wanted to smoke weed.

[801] And if I could be the one to get the alcohol, then I was a fucking legend.

[802] And I could get it at any point.

[803] No telling what we were drinking.

[804] We were just mixing shit up in a water bottle.

[805] And I was bringing out to the boys and we're walking through the neighborhood like slugging it back.

[806] Or hey, mister, and somebody at the gas station, like, hey, mister, can you get us a pack of cigarettes?

[807] And there's always somebody that would.

[808] You knew better than to say, hey, ma 'am.

[809] Yeah, the ma 'ams weren't buying too much.

[810] Hell no. Booze were underage drinkers.

[811] Okay, so music takes off.

[812] You start really committing to it.

[813] You start messing around with the piano and the ukulele, you're watching YouTube to learn singing technique, which, by the way, it's kind of mind -blowing that, yeah, if you're born in 92, this is...

[814] It's an option for you.

[815] It's a total road.

[816] I wouldn't have had that.

[817] Yeah, it's a perfect time.

[818] I think it's super powerful.

[819] That's why I think kids these days are so much more well -off.

[820] You know, you can school at any moment, and there's an 11 -year -old doing what we think we are good at, way better than we'll ever be at it.

[821] Access to information of being able to learn and play is...

[822] Study yet.

[823] So much harder than what even I had, and I'm grateful.

[824] for that.

[825] I could just Google.

[826] You know, if I wanted to watch Marvin Gay and watch him live, I could see videos of him sitting there singing and watch his mouth and what he's doing, how he moved, and I could watch Grammy performances with Michael Jackson.

[827] I remember the first time I saw Michael Jackson do that one where he beats the record he gets seven Grammys.

[828] He goes on to get an eighth one that same night for thrill, and he's like, I promise that if I win another Grammy, which is seven, which is a record, I take my glasses off.

[829] And I really don't want to, but I'm only doing this for Miss Hepburn because she's a dear friend of mine.

[830] And he just pulls him up in her mind.

[831] And he puts him down and he was in my ears and he walks off.

[832] And I was like, that is the most gangster shit I've ever seen.

[833] No, can you imagine having America excited to see you take your classes on me?

[834] He was so sick.

[835] He was so badass to me. And I just like, dude, from that point, I was just watching him.

[836] I was always like, God, what a fucking badass dude.

[837] Did you watch that greatest night in pop music documentary on Netflix?

[838] Oh, I have not.

[839] Oh, my God.

[840] Your head's going to spin.

[841] It's about them coming together to make We Are the World.

[842] You've got like Quincy Jones and Lionel Rich.

[843] She kind of orchestrating everything.

[844] And it's every single greatest singer alive in this one room.

[845] The kind of two undeniable standouts of the doc are Michael Jackson.

[846] He's somehow on his own.

[847] Everyone else is together, but he's on his own.

[848] And when he sings, you're like, yeah, that's it.

[849] There's just really no comparing.

[850] Bob Dylan, he's not that kind of singer.

[851] So he can't really find his way into this song.

[852] And they're all struggling.

[853] And they're all struggling.

[854] And then Stevie Wonder imitates Bob Dylan to Bob Dylan.

[855] And they're on his back, and when you're watching it, you think it's Bob Dylan singing.

[856] So Stevie Wonder singing in Dylan's voice explaining to him what notes he should find to work his way into this song.

[857] And he kind of saves Bob Dylan's performance.

[858] And you're like, okay, well, that guy's just a phenom.

[859] What a monster, man. Stevie Wonder.

[860] Yeah, songs in the key life, number one for me. Man, I'd love to be breathing the same air.

[861] He's the one.

[862] So you join a bunch of bands.

[863] I'm imagining it takes you a minute.

[864] A, you're probably just saying yes to any opportunity that comes your.

[865] What?

[866] These dudes want you to sing with them?

[867] Great.

[868] I'm in.

[869] How do we get from saying yes to everything, being in a hair metal cover band, being an R &B band, being an alternative rock band.

[870] How do you discover what you're really supposed to be singing?

[871] I had the same guys.

[872] It was kind of a tight -knit community of musicians, and a lot of kids were doing metal from when I got out of high school until even now, you know?

[873] And I was still in a metal band called Ayers at the time and this band called Wildheart.

[874] Me and my buddy Addy Maxwell, who plays guitar for me still and writes a lot with me. So weird, man. I had everything kind of happened to me once.

[875] This girl, I was with at time, had left me. My car broken down.

[876] My roommates had moved out.

[877] I walked like the last two miles to my work, and the place was closing down.

[878] Everything just hit the fan at once and really bad off at the time.

[879] What ages this?

[880] I must have been 26, 27.

[881] This was right before Teddy Swims really started happening.

[882] And at the time, I was with this girl who had a child and her baby daddy wasn't around.

[883] And I was even about to go get this full -time job and I was trying to like think.

[884] I was like, you know what, man?

[885] Maybe I just need to raise this kid.

[886] He's worth it.

[887] And I almost gave it up.

[888] And all this shit just hit the fan all at once.

[889] And I had called my dad, and I was like, man, can I move there to your house?

[890] And I just really need to place a crash for a couple months.

[891] So I put my mattress basically on the floor in his garage and just trying to, like, camp out there.

[892] And there was no carpet or anything.

[893] And my buddy, Lee, who had recorded most of my metal band, was actually in Loganville.

[894] He was right down the road from my dad's house.

[895] And so we started just kind of messing with stuff.

[896] And he got me in this band, Wildheart, and that started going somewhere.

[897] And me and Addy started doing hip -hop music because he was making beats for some rappers and sending it out.

[898] And we decided to make a hip -hop song.

[899] and we did one song, and my pal Tyler Carter was in this band Issues.

[900] He comes over, and he's doing a solo tour, and he hears our one song, and he's like, man, this shit's badass, dude.

[901] Give me like 30 minutes of music, and you guys come on tour with me. I'm like, we only have one song.

[902] He's like, I'm going to the UK with issues.

[903] It's only four minutes long, so.

[904] He's like, I'm going to the UK with issues, and I'll be back in a month.

[905] You have a month to get, like, 30 minutes of music.

[906] So me and Addy grind it out a bunch of hip -hop songs where we're rapping on these songs.

[907] Is the quality going downhill quickly?

[908] It's getting better.

[909] Oh, it's getting better.

[910] Yeah, it's getting better.

[911] We're getting better at rapping.

[912] Eddie's crushing it.

[913] I'm okay, but it's not my thing.

[914] I'm here to sing.

[915] But this is my opportunity to go on tour, so fuck it, we're here.

[916] So we get back, we have this thing trying to figure out our name.

[917] I was going by Swims by that time, and it was just someone who was me play this character of this rapper.

[918] Tyler's like, well, why don't we just put Teddy in front of everybody calls you that?

[919] And then, boom, you're Teddy Swims.

[920] And I was like, dude, I really kind of fucking hate that.

[921] And then he's like, well, it's my tour.

[922] So I'm putting it on the flyer.

[923] So it was Adie Maxwell and Teddy Swims.

[924] Is your Jaten, Colin, Demsdale.

[925] Yes, sir.

[926] Jaten, that's a pretty unique name.

[927] Yeah, it is.

[928] Neither.

[929] But you were going by Teddy?

[930] Yeah, I've always been called Teddy because while I was waiting tables and stuff, Jaten's hard.

[931] They're like Jake, Jamie, Jason.

[932] So my look, it's just how he's, oh, there's our Teddy.

[933] Oh, like Teddy Bear?

[934] Yeah, and that's where it's kind of comes.

[935] Oh, sweet.

[936] Jaden, that's so sweet.

[937] Yeah, I've always been Teddy.

[938] Yeah, yeah, okay.

[939] We ended up doing this tour, and this was March of 2019, and then we get back, and the Teddy Swim's thing was kind of cool.

[940] Maybe I could do shit as Teddy Swims, and I just used the name Teddy Swims and uploaded a Michael Jackson cover of Rock with you.

[941] Watch it this morning.

[942] It's incredible.

[943] June 25th of 2019, and that was 10 years after he died.

[944] And so we wanted to just pay homage, and it started going crazy.

[945] And we were like, guys, why don't we just turn this shit into Teddy Swims?

[946] Let's see what happens here.

[947] And we kept doing the covers.

[948] And most beautiful thing is my manager, Luke, who lives out here, he hopped in a car and drove a Prius with a U -Haul in the back of it all the way to Georgia.

[949] And we moved in this little house of Snellville.

[950] It was a five -bedroom house.

[951] Me and all my friends, about 12 of us moved into this place.

[952] And we built plywood walls and built two studios in there, split rooms into two rooms.

[953] I was like, dude, if we get six months, we started making our merch and distributing it out of the garage, filming our own stuff, singing and recording our own stuff, playing and writing our own stuff, doing the covers.

[954] I quit my job, was getting floated by my boys, and just six months of those guys, this will work.

[955] And I kid you not, December 24th of 2019, a day less than six months, we get signed a Warner Records.

[956] And I get this fucking million dollar deal and put all my buddies on salary.

[957] The manifestation of just you and your friends coming together and be like, guys, we can do this if we just all put our heads together.

[958] Yeah, it's kind of the full commitment moment.

[959] And it feels like you're so behind on life.

[960] It's always at the 28, 29, 30 mark, you're just like, God, I'm so far behind.

[961] And the kids that are coming up, too, that are making music.

[962] Like, you got Billy Elish crushing at 16.

[963] I'm like, God, what the fuck am I doing here?

[964] I'm a decade older and her.

[965] What's going to happen to me?

[966] Why pick rock with you?

[967] I want to applaud that.

[968] I think off the wall is the best of all those albums.

[969] Yeah, I got it hanging on my wall now, man. Rock with you, weirdly enough, because it was that time, we had found the stems of it online.

[970] Sometimes producers want to just take something and mix, you know?

[971] My producer was just.

[972] going in and he had found the stems of it and was like, I want to mix this out, which is really cool because you can hear Rod Temperton, when you get all the stems of the song, you can actually mute a bunch of the stuff, and there's the original mumble track of it too.

[973] And so you hear, right, like, Bunt the boo, bunch of and he's just, like, kind of doing the mumble, where they wrote it to.

[974] And it's so cool.

[975] It's like they had the instrumental done, and he went and made up the melody with his mumbles, and then they went and wrote the words to the mumbles, which is so sick.

[976] And is that in the Finnish The mumbles aren't, but when you get the stems, you can hear that they kept that in there.

[977] It's so crazy because it's similar to a lot of times we do the same thing where you just kind of come up with the mumble of the melody first, and then sometimes you might be almost saying a word, and you're like, what are you saying there?

[978] Oh, shit, that sounds like you're saying this, and then you come up with some beautiful words.

[979] My song The Door, for instance, my buddy just already had the beat and the bumble of it, and we kind of just, oh, it sounded like you said, started writing to this.

[980] You reverse engineer it kind of.

[981] Yeah, and so it was cool to see that happen and see that was still the way that it was done.

[982] Yeah.

[983] Now, Rock With You got, I don't know, 10 million views or something, or maybe more when I looked at it this morning and had 10 million views.

[984] But you're still the one by Shania Twain.

[985] Seems like a very from left field choice.

[986] Oh, my God, I need to hear that.

[987] And that one has 167 million views.

[988] It was a monster.

[989] Yeah.

[990] Yeah, that's probably the one that gets Warner Records attention.

[991] I think the biggest thing is because the original version we did of it, I dedicated it my mother.

[992] And I was like, this goes out of my mom, you know, I love you and the touch people.

[993] It's kind of a mystery because Rock with you seems more in tune with you.

[994] you, it just doesn't seem like you're going to sing that.

[995] I think there's also some of the mixed messages of looking at you singing that song is very interesting.

[996] That's the thing that first worked out for me and rock with you is once it hit this 500 ,000 views, people were looking at my face and my whole thing going on and singing that song, they were like, okay, either this is going to be funny or this is going to be really good.

[997] Or it's going to be both.

[998] And it ended up being, I think, quite funny and actually good.

[999] People were like, I did not expect this guy to sing this way.

[1000] So we kind of leaned into that gimmick so much.

[1001] And it's been a thing that's really pivotal in my career.

[1002] Real music videos have never worked for us.

[1003] Just playing the song really quite works for you.

[1004] I just find that it's always when somebody says like, listen to this guy.

[1005] Okay, now look what he looks like.

[1006] You know, it's always been my thing.

[1007] And so we just totally fucking pedal to the metal on making sure my face is in everything and why I'm singing.

[1008] So people are like, whoa, that's a good voice.

[1009] But I don't think it's as good as the juxtaposition versus what I look like.

[1010] People are fucking stunned.

[1011] And it's helped me out so much.

[1012] That makes sense.

[1013] Yeah.

[1014] Yeah, if you look the part perfectly, it would be a foregone conclusion.

[1015] Yeah.

[1016] So there's nothing novel or interesting about it.

[1017] WWE, you got to work the fucking gimmick, you know?

[1018] You've got to have some gimmick that gets people's attention.

[1019] But do you think it's by design a little bit, even just in life?

[1020] Do you like presenting one way?

[1021] I had a buddy of mine, my best pal from school, Julian's Outsar, man. He's my dog.

[1022] And he told me one time, it was a few years ago, before all this, he said, you're really an icon when somebody can dress as you for Halloween and people can know it's you.

[1023] And I remember hearing that.

[1024] being like, okay, what do I got to do from here to make sure that's the case?

[1025] And I've spent forever trying to be like, okay, what do I like to put a little bandana on, grow my hair out this way, tattoo my face?

[1026] What do I got to do here to make me different?

[1027] Yeah.

[1028] But I definitely put a lot of thought and effort.

[1029] Certainly people went as you to Halloween last year.

[1030] Have you seen any pictures?

[1031] Yeah, I have a picture.

[1032] Also, my buddy, Kurt, my door manager, his little cousin, they'd written all the, and I had this one, I can't remember the family on Instagram.

[1033] They did a video.

[1034] It's loose control, and he's like, kind of malting it.

[1035] They came to my show and my meet and greet, too, and he had it was all dressed.

[1036] messed up and shit with the tattoos going and they drew them on.

[1037] It's so cool, bro.

[1038] Watching kids do that especially.

[1039] Yeah.

[1040] It's so awesome.

[1041] Obviously, I have tattoos, but I have no face tattoos.

[1042] What's the chat in your head as you go in and you're like, well, we're going to go all in on this?

[1043] Well, the first one I got, so it says Home at Last up here.

[1044] On your hairline.

[1045] My granddad had passed away.

[1046] It was really the first time I ever saw death right there in front of me. So he was in his room and they had separate rooms within their 52 years.

[1047] You know, eventually I guess you just get separate rooms.

[1048] She got sick of hearing of it and she wasn't doing it right, probably.

[1049] So I'm sitting there playing piano.

[1050] Like I said, we're all in this diamond.

[1051] So there's like 50 of us by the time I get there.

[1052] Everybody in the family is so quick to go right there.

[1053] So my grandma was trying to be all strong, and she sits there with me after everybody walks out of the room, and she finally breaks down, and she said, he's home at last.

[1054] He's home at last.

[1055] And then she goes, but you left me behind and sobs and soaps.

[1056] He'd always told me to never get my face tattooed because the calling a God is without repentance, son.

[1057] You don't ever want to get your face tattooed.

[1058] And as soon as he passed away, I just got one in commembrance of him just to be like...

[1059] A little bit of a...

[1060] I love you, brother.

[1061] I love you and I love you and fuck you're the fucking man. But if heaven exists, then he owes me an asswoman when I get up there, you know?

[1062] And then from there I just kind of got a little carried away.

[1063] Now I just fucking get them.

[1064] Sometimes I just get the edge.

[1065] And there's been times where I've been on the road too where it's been bad.

[1066] Like last October 5th, my basis is birthday.

[1067] We had a tattoo artist come in and he wanted to get like a little party hat right here on his wrist.

[1068] And I was like, just do it on my face, dude.

[1069] I got this dumb ass party hat right here.

[1070] That was so hammered.

[1071] wake up the next day, like, trying to lick it off.

[1072] And I was like, oh, shit, when did I get that, dude?

[1073] Okay, so that one you regret.

[1074] I mean, it's there.

[1075] It's whatever.

[1076] I did immediately have regrets to it.

[1077] And they were like, boo, you don't remember all night?

[1078] You're walking around just bouncing your eyebrows.

[1079] Like, party jumping, party jumping, party jumping, party jumping.

[1080] I was like, dude, you should have put me to bed way earlier then.

[1081] Why the fuck was I doing that?

[1082] What a piece of huge trash I was.

[1083] Yeah, because I guess I sometimes assume the saddest thing when I see people.

[1084] Like, let me put it this way.

[1085] I have none on my left arm.

[1086] Well, I have a couple.

[1087] But I'm not covering my left arm because I actually like how my left arm looks.

[1088] I got a good vein in my bicep.

[1089] I'm like, well, I don't want to cover that up.

[1090] So what I know is that if I really like it is, I'm not drawn on it.

[1091] So then I reverse engineer that sometimes when I see people with a ton of tattoos on their face, I'm like, they didn't think there was anything to lose.

[1092] I could see where you're coming from.

[1093] Maybe it's just me being older.

[1094] But first of all, when I look at dudes with tattoos, I think they're like me, which is I got fucked with an abuse as a kid, and I want to send a message not to fuck with me. I want to be tough.

[1095] Maybe there's a piece of that, too.

[1096] I've been too approachable sometimes.

[1097] Maybe there's a piece of it inside that subconsciously I do want to look tougher.

[1098] Maybe there's always this piece of me that feels like I'm judged for being this and I want to turn people's minds into not judging a book by its cover.

[1099] I've not put a lot of thought into much of it.

[1100] So I wouldn't say it's a deep, rooted thing.

[1101] But also, when you bring those up, I'm like, yeah, I mean, it could be a subconscious thing that I'm doing that I couldn't tell you you're wrong about.

[1102] But I didn't go into it thinking that I was compartmentalizing or overcompensating for anything.

[1103] Yeah.

[1104] How about this, though?

[1105] So the other thing was I was very into punk rock as a kid.

[1106] And what I liked is there was like a costume.

[1107] So I had the crazy hairdo.

[1108] That would distract you from me. I had crazy clothes on.

[1109] That would distract you.

[1110] And this character I was playing was seen as super confident.

[1111] Girls were like, oh, this guy is so confident.

[1112] He's got this crazy hairdo.

[1113] No one else does.

[1114] But it was a total illusion.

[1115] That's a lot to do with it, 100%.

[1116] That confidence level is something that I've worked on a lot.

[1117] Over the pandemic, I was so fortunate.

[1118] And I have a tattoo of them right here.

[1119] Diamond Dallas Page, man, one of my heroes in my life.

[1120] Who's he?

[1121] I'm sorry.

[1122] Diamond Dallas Page is a WCW legend, like a old wrestler.

[1123] And he started this thing called DDP Yoga, and it's this mixture of yoga and calisthenics.

[1124] It saved a lot of people, gotten a lot of people that were injured back on the field.

[1125] There's this guy, Arthur Borman, you can check out on YouTube.

[1126] And this guy was 300 -something pounds and was on Walker.

[1127] Ended up doing DDP for this little time.

[1128] And his whole body healed and is miraculous, man. It was running 5Ks after that, and it's rehabilitation and calisthenics.

[1129] And it's changed so many people's lives.

[1130] It's been a beautiful thing, and I spent about six months or so with DDP, and we talk once a week, and he just got this thing, and it's like, it's really the story you tell yourself.

[1131] Once you own this six -inch piece of real estate between your ears, and there was so many things I was doing.

[1132] When regards to my weight when I was coming up, I really had a lot of insecurities and a lot of beaten down of myself.

[1133] And it was also what was fueling my alcohol and my drug abuse.

[1134] It was definitely because of a lot of insecurities that I was scared.

[1135] I'd even watch some old plays, and I see myself doing this number while I'm doing plays and not really being confident on stage.

[1136] And I used to hate watching myself or hearing my voice, and there was the time that I went through with him that I constantly have to tell myself.

[1137] These little bitty things, like when you look yourself in the mirror and say, I love you, you are beautiful.

[1138] It took me forever to get to a point where I even want to take my shirt off in front of people.

[1139] You know, I even just the other day, I did this shoot, had to be just kind of shirtless.

[1140] As confident as I feel with my shirt off now, doing a shoot that's going to be on a Times Square billboard or something.

[1141] Oh, my God.

[1142] Scared to death doing that.

[1143] Of course.

[1144] There's 50 people on this shoot that are just staring at me like, okay, now turn this way.

[1145] And I've just never been that exposed to a people's like eye.

[1146] They're like, come here, let me get some makeup here.

[1147] Let's get some more oil going right here.

[1148] They're finding problems.

[1149] They're making adjustments.

[1150] Oh, God, pulling my shorts down.

[1151] I've never been in that place.

[1152] It was a really big eye -opening thing for me. You have to accept yourself.

[1153] And it's like the hardest thing in the world to do.

[1154] And when I see people like, my beautiful girl now, she's just got the perfect body.

[1155] For her to have body dysmorphia.

[1156] We all have that, and there's nobody more beautiful that doesn't have the same thing going on.

[1157] When I stopped feeling so alone in that, and I started just accepting this is what I have.

[1158] I do think a lot of this was to take away from the, especially these tattoos all in here.

[1159] It was distracting you from my gut or my boobs to kind of give you something else to look at.

[1160] There was a lot to do with that for sure, brother.

[1161] Of course.

[1162] And what's funny is I think the route to liking yourself, Monica and I have too many conversations about this.

[1163] But if you're comparing yourself to Brad Pitt, yeah, you're out.

[1164] I'm out.

[1165] There's nothing we can do if we're comparing ourselves.

[1166] But if we remember that actually novelties what's so beautiful.

[1167] Yeah, come on.

[1168] And specific, like, no, no, that's what you look like.

[1169] And you as defined by who you are and your character.

[1170] You're the physical representation of your spirit.

[1171] And we can all come to think everyone's super attractive.

[1172] If that inside's good and you recognize like, oh, I'm the only one who looks like this.

[1173] Anytime I can really hone in on that feeling of like, this is the only one.

[1174] That's awesome.

[1175] It's not Brad Pitt, but I'm the only one like this.

[1176] And you're the only one like that.

[1177] Monica's the only one like that.

[1178] Although I am starting to wonder now with AI and the SIM that there's just like 10 cookie cutters.

[1179] We're all just 10 cookie cutters with like a little bit of different hair.

[1180] You know, I can see that.

[1181] There are certain types.

[1182] Yes.

[1183] A big thing for me, too, is I stop worrying about what I look like in pictures now because I see myself on stage and people post these pictures of me and I'm just looking crazy.

[1184] Sure, sure.

[1185] And so nowadays I don't really worry about the way I look because you can't control the way you look.

[1186] The way I look at myself in the mirror is probably even still a fixed -up version of myself.

[1187] Oh.

[1188] I know before I even walked to the mirror, I already got the face picked out.

[1189] And I don't even know I'm choosing.

[1190] Right.

[1191] I'm cool Joe today.

[1192] As soon as I leave the mirror, this little sucking I had going is immediately out.

[1193] You're so right.

[1194] I don't think any of us have any true idea of what we look like.

[1195] No, we don't have no clue.

[1196] This will comfort you.

[1197] Bradley Cooper was on here saying that he genuinely thought when he won sexiest man alive that it was like a bit, that people were fucking with him.

[1198] He sincerely thought that.

[1199] You're like, well, that's comforting.

[1200] He is sexy.

[1201] He says he was a motherfucker.

[1202] My God.

[1203] Okay, let's get to you writing Lose Control.

[1204] Because you're prolific.

[1205] You have that six months of focus.

[1206] You get signed.

[1207] You have two EPs.

[1208] And then within two years of that, you're releasing, I've tried everything but therapy part one, your album.

[1209] You're writing hundreds of songs, right?

[1210] Yeah.

[1211] I just got back a couple of days ago from another writing camp.

[1212] We were there five days and split up into two rooms, but eight of us and turned out probably 20.

[1213] songs.

[1214] Writing Loose Control, I think, was the one that we had kind of been building this sound for a long time.

[1215] I was also in a really toxic thing at the time when an ex I was with.

[1216] It was bender to bender and I think we both kind of got to this place of being really codependent on this lifestyle we're sharing and these high, high, these little loves.

[1217] Lifting each other up out of shame all the time or piling on shame all the time, leveraging each other's shame against each other.

[1218] That shit, exactly, bro.

[1219] You know that too well.

[1220] We kind of were into that place and weirdly enough, we wrote that song and the door.

[1221] or two, it just top 42.

[1222] On the same day, I had broke down that day and was just sobbing and sobbing about the situation because it just seemed like it couldn't get better.

[1223] And every time I was doing something, it was like, where are you?

[1224] What are you doing?

[1225] I was coming to a head with her in our situation.

[1226] By the way, that's already a familiar pattern because mom thought you're doing bad stuff you weren't doing.

[1227] Yeah.

[1228] So like the familiarity.

[1229] I think so.

[1230] Yeah, we mistake familiarity, I think a lot with comfort.

[1231] Comfort and love and all these things.

[1232] I think there was just always that piece of it.

[1233] There's a lot of patterns that I will say that I'd chosen, toxic relationship I had with my mom at some point in my childhood.

[1234] Yeah, that's what we do.

[1235] Yeah, we all do that.

[1236] It's so weird, too, because we had written these songs about this certain thing, and it's so nuts that we wrote The Door, for instance.

[1237] The Night I saved my life when I showed you the door, and I wrote this song, and I was talking about this song, and I didn't even realize because I was just numbing myself to the situation.

[1238] Like, I knew the song, Lose Control was going to be special.

[1239] I knew it was going to change my life.

[1240] I knew we had nailed it.

[1241] But it wasn't until way later after it come out and I got out of this situation that I, like, listened to that song, and then I listened to the door, and I listened to a lot of those songs we wrote then and a lot of that album, and I was like, my subconscious was telling me what I should be doing and trying to save me, and I was just numbing it, not even hearing it for what it was.

[1242] I heard my own words back to me a few months later, just broke down in my car like, what?

[1243] Where was I for myself?

[1244] You know, myself was like talking to me. I was putting things in a words that I needed to hear with friends that wanted to also tell me what I needed to hear.

[1245] And I was so numb to that.

[1246] I love the idea that songs can do this, because I write, and often I've written on experiences I've had and as I'm writing them, I don't really understand them.

[1247] And then I read what I've written afterwards, and all of a sudden I go, oh, okay, now I actually understand it, but I had to write it first.

[1248] And that's cool that a song can do that as well.

[1249] I think that's a beauty of writing, though, because I find that if you're going through an issue and you come to me, I got the exact advice to give you.

[1250] But if I'm going through that, I'm a fucking wreck.

[1251] Yeah, of course.

[1252] And so I think it's just turning yourself into something that you can read that gives you advice to yourself.

[1253] You need some distance from yourself.

[1254] Exactly.

[1255] When you turn your words into a friend that somebody else would say to you, then you're like, oh, thanks, bro.

[1256] Yeah.

[1257] Appreciate it.

[1258] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1259] You're so close to the thing.

[1260] That separation from yourself is really truly like, okay, I see it now.

[1261] I'm having nightmares every night, and I'm freaking out about this thing.

[1262] I didn't know that it was that cut and dry in my brain, but I had clouded it up with so much shit, and I was running from it so much, and I just couldn't catch up to myself.

[1263] It's kind of crazy how brilliant the subconscious is.

[1264] It's mad, dude.

[1265] Well, it's there to protect you, too.

[1266] Sometimes we're not.

[1267] ready to feel it or understand it.

[1268] So when you're ready is when you can hear it.

[1269] So maybe you just weren't there yet.

[1270] Certainly not.

[1271] To some degree, I wish I would have listened to myself sooner, but it's so great that I did go through those things and I was able to talk about them in a way and put them in a song in a way that was actually super life -changing for me and turned it into such a positive thing.

[1272] And now I touched so many people and I hear beautiful stories about it touching people's lives and changing people's life.

[1273] And when we play those songs where they come on in a party, everybody can celebrate to this absolute pain and turn it into something we can revel in And we can celebrate this pain and agony.

[1274] And that's such a beautiful thing.

[1275] Well, you give people the gift of not feeling alone because they can feel what you're going through.

[1276] And they do the same for me, dude.

[1277] And it's a powerful fucking thing.

[1278] 2 .6 billion streams.

[1279] It's fucking nuts.

[1280] Wow, wow, wow.

[1281] That's crazy.

[1282] I mean, the title of the album is, I've tried everything but therapy part one.

[1283] And then I did hear you in another interview say that you're terrified to change because you're afraid that all that stuff is the source of all the creativity.

[1284] And I'm wondering how you feel a year out from all that.

[1285] Have you gone to therapy?

[1286] I guess that's the first question.

[1287] Because I think I got the guy for you.

[1288] Really?

[1289] Yeah.

[1290] I would love to try.

[1291] I'm guessing.

[1292] I'm projecting.

[1293] But I have a very hard time.

[1294] I'm a paradox.

[1295] I want everyone's adoration.

[1296] And when I get everyone's adoration, I can't feel it or experience it or accept it.

[1297] And then that leaves me feeling completely fraudulent and unworthy of it.

[1298] And then my reaction to it has been so varied, like I don't want to take pictures.

[1299] Why?

[1300] Well, the truth is because I don't really feel worthy of you wanting a picture with me. So I'm annoyed.

[1301] I'm experiencing being annoyed, but that's not even what was going on.

[1302] It was like, oh, no, I just actually don't feel like I deserve to be in someone's photo.

[1303] And this dude that I've been working with for two and a half years has got me to a place where I totally accept it.

[1304] And it's been crazy breakthrough for me. And it's decompressed all the highs and lows of it.

[1305] Connected way with him.

[1306] Yeah, yeah.

[1307] I think that's been the biggest thing is if I've talked to some.

[1308] somebody here and there, and DDP is the closest guy I've got to it because he's also been able to help me navigate this growth in this rocket ship and how fast life is changing right now.

[1309] I would love to talk to somebody that knows those kind of things because just go into a traditional therapist.

[1310] I mean, they can help.

[1311] You're a pretty foreign object for them.

[1312] Yeah, and I want to talk to somebody that knows what I'm going through right now on the journey to become whatever it is I'm aiming to do.

[1313] And don't you have this poll or I have this poll, which is to acknowledge I am good would be sacrilegious.

[1314] flying too close to the sun, right?

[1315] That God's going to smite me if I actually believe I'm worried about it.

[1316] Yeah, absolutely.

[1317] But it's so awful, though.

[1318] Then you don't experience any of the wonderful, magical things that are happening to you because you think to do so would be to anger the gods, that you would be getting too big and bold and egomaniacal.

[1319] Just to accept, not to parade around like I'm Teddy swims, but just to fucking accept it.

[1320] Yeah, totally.

[1321] That that's okay.

[1322] And you're not smiting anyone.

[1323] You're not flying too close.

[1324] that you're not an egonomaniacal asshole.

[1325] You're just like going, I can own the fact that I opened up my mouth in 2 .6 billion times people wanted to hear that because I found something special.

[1326] It's hard.

[1327] Please, I'm right there.

[1328] Yeah, thank you.

[1329] See it right through me, yeah, for certain.

[1330] And then when you're drunk, you can accept it.

[1331] Oh, God, I'm the best.

[1332] Yeah.

[1333] Now, no worries about being too ego maniacal and I'm hammered.

[1334] I'm in sufferable drunk.

[1335] I find, too, that my writing, you know, using that as a tool.

[1336] It allows me to feel like my ideas are super strong.

[1337] And sometimes I'll have the same ideas if I'm sober, but it's been taking me forever because I'll be like, oh, maybe this could be, or maybe this could be a chorus like this.

[1338] But when I'm a drunk asshole, I'm like up and like, dude, what if it's, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah.

[1339] You know, and I'm just jumping around.

[1340] I'm like, this is it, okay, this is the next part.

[1341] There's this confidence to me, and this song is great to me that even if after the next day, it's absolute garbage, I was so confident and every part of it was correct.

[1342] You weren't afraid to take a huge swing.

[1343] And I feel like sometimes in the room I'm trying to now learn you don't have to be hammered to write a good song.

[1344] You could not drink and write a great song.

[1345] And learning that has been a pivotal thing in my life.

[1346] Yeah, because the broken math in your equation, it's not being drunk that allows you to do that.

[1347] It's confidence that allows you to do that.

[1348] And that's just a version of getting confidence.

[1349] And there's other versions.

[1350] But the fear that the magic that is you would disappear without it is bullshit.

[1351] If anything, it might be hindering.

[1352] It's absolute bullshit for sure.

[1353] And also will dictate whether you get to do this for five more years or 40.

[1354] more years.

[1355] Yeah, exactly.

[1356] But entertainment slittered with that.

[1357] I mean, Jackie Gleason never performed sober.

[1358] In his mind, he couldn't do stand -up sober.

[1359] He couldn't be in movie sober.

[1360] He acted hammered.

[1361] But that was a lie.

[1362] Jackie Gleason could have been Jackie Gleason without anything.

[1363] Last year, I did my first Europe tour sober, and I did this year, most of it sober.

[1364] And I try to make sure I take those times to try to do shows.

[1365] But I always find that when I'm going back into doing show sober, the first couple were just absolute nerve -wracking.

[1366] Oh, my God, I don't have this energy.

[1367] But the energy is going to be there as soon as.

[1368] You hear the adoration and the love in the room, it just turns right on.

[1369] It's walking to the wings of the stage.

[1370] Yeah.

[1371] Once you're at the stage looking, doesn't something take over you?

[1372] Yeah, absolutely.

[1373] I don't need it.

[1374] But for some reason, there's that piece of my brain that says, I'm just funnier, I'm cooler.

[1375] It's scary all this stuff.

[1376] Alcohol removes fear.

[1377] It literally removes inhibition.

[1378] That's what it does.

[1379] So everything that's objectively scary becomes less scary.

[1380] But you have to, like, get through the fear four times, and then it's, over.

[1381] Does that make sense?

[1382] Absolutely.

[1383] Although I will say one time I interviewed Monica in Denver, our guest fell out.

[1384] Their plane didn't come.

[1385] So she became the subject of the live interview and we got some wine bottles out there to...

[1386] Yeah.

[1387] I mean, I drink.

[1388] I'm not saying that I'm immune to this.

[1389] That's why I can say that because it makes things less daunting.

[1390] All of it.

[1391] Makes time change.

[1392] It works.

[1393] It works.

[1394] It makes it so much easier to get to know somebody and not be afraid to step out be like, yay, what's up?

[1395] The innovations are just...

[1396] Yeah.

[1397] There's a piece of me that always loves me that way.

[1398] I love that guy.

[1399] But also, that guy can be achieved without...

[1400] Totally.

[1401] But I just haven't figured that guy out yet.

[1402] Well, you're 31.

[1403] Hey, this guy is awesome.

[1404] You have time.

[1405] Yeah.

[1406] I got sober at 29.

[1407] Also, it's funny, when you're in it, you do love the person.

[1408] You love the drunk version of yourself or the inebriated version or whatever.

[1409] But if you're on video...

[1410] And then you see...

[1411] You don't like that person.

[1412] I don't know.

[1413] I had a zone, Monica.

[1414] I got a sweet spot in a drug, yeah.

[1415] It's hard to live in the sweet spot.

[1416] It's like, I can watch that video.

[1417] How do you know, have you?

[1418] Well, yeah, we used to take so much video back when I was drinking.

[1419] And yeah, there's a sweet spot.

[1420] There's one in particular.

[1421] We go on this tubing trip in Michigan.

[1422] We get on the bus.

[1423] We're running a lot of video.

[1424] And we're only about seven, eight beers deep.

[1425] And then we decide, let's do a second run down the river three hours later after drinking.

[1426] And then the footage from that, parking lot i'm not as funny as i thought i was that one right there's a little yeah tipped yeah stay tuned for more farm chair expert if you dare so you're going out on tour soon you're going back to europe we're going to australia on the first we're doing our first arenas in australia new zealand arenas dude so cool how exciting so you start in new zealand and Then you go to Australian.

[1427] It's my favorite place in the world.

[1428] Australia, you've already back.

[1429] Yeah, we've been out there.

[1430] Every year we go, and we've been building this thing up to be to that point.

[1431] The big thing about touring now is that it's such a different business now that it used to be.

[1432] You can have a hit and not be able to sell a 500 -cap room.

[1433] And you could be the number one song and not be able to sell those tickets.

[1434] Frames doesn't quite put asses in the seats.

[1435] We go and we played everything from the 300 cap to the 1 ,000 cap, to the 1 ,500 cap.

[1436] Every place that will let us in that we haven't played at, we're playing.

[1437] Whether it's a 5 ,000, 10 ,000, whatever it is, we're playing those places.

[1438] We're putting that flag down somewhere.

[1439] You have to do that in order to maintain.

[1440] Because I know now if anything else doesn't get any bigger in my career than this, all the new music I ever put out, I have a foundation of people that it will always come see me, or have kids who are growing up on me, that will also bring their kids eventually if I'm so lucky to do this for that long.

[1441] And you have to build your touring business is so different than your music.

[1442] Well, right, you don't make any money anymore selling album.

[1443] If you don't have a touring business, you don't have much of a business.

[1444] You can have a number one hit and not sell 300 tickets, and it's crazy how that can work.

[1445] How do you like having money?

[1446] How's it going?

[1447] Oh, it's great.

[1448] I like it a lot.

[1449] Have you bought anything stupid?

[1450] I haven't bought anything stupid.

[1451] When we hit number one, me and my manager, we got the Cartier tanks together, which was really cute.

[1452] Okay.

[1453] My stupid little buy, but it was like my first little watch.

[1454] I bought a new Bronco to you last year, and I got the fucking wild track, the Raptor engine in it.

[1455] When I moved out here full time, I was like, I got to get a damn Bronco.

[1456] But other than that, I haven't done anything other than I send my mom money every month.

[1457] But also, you learned early on you said the house with the house with.

[1458] With your dad, with the love was more important to you than the house with the stuff.

[1459] And so that's a good lesson to learn early.

[1460] Yeah, the first thing I did when I got signed to Warner was get my dad a Ford F -150 Lariat.

[1461] We had been breaking down and pushing and I could put a damn starter trends, but whatever the fucking anything.

[1462] So I got him a real good truck when I first got signed.

[1463] First big purchase I made.

[1464] Oh, that's so sweet before you got yourself anything.

[1465] Yeah, he's my hero.

[1466] But I haven't really done anything stupid yet.

[1467] I spent a lot of money on food.

[1468] I will always go get every fucking appetizer there is.

[1469] I don't mind dropping a bag on a meal for me and my friends.

[1470] That's where I'll go crazy.

[1471] And you live in L .A. now?

[1472] Yeah, Sherman Oaks.

[1473] You like it?

[1474] I love it.

[1475] It took me a minute to find my footing.

[1476] You know, the people I like to see, the places I like to go.

[1477] So many people like to be seen places rather than be places here.

[1478] And once you find that grounding, Sherman Oaks has been like back home in Atlanta, I bought a camera there.

[1479] I'm not going to look like a target.

[1480] You know what you think?

[1481] They'll take the fucking tires off your shit if you got something nice.

[1482] Sure, sure, sure.

[1483] You got to leave the window.

[1484] down, door is unlocked, nothing of value in your car, just make it easy for them to get in there.

[1485] Sign that says unlocked on the outside of the door.

[1486] Yeah, just please don't bust a window.

[1487] Yeah.

[1488] It's unlocked.

[1489] Yeah.

[1490] Well, listen, Teddy, it's been so great to talk to you.

[1491] I loved getting to see you perform.

[1492] I feel so lucky about that.

[1493] Did you stick around for John Batiste?

[1494] No, I didn't get to.

[1495] We were doing the schmooze thing, so I didn't get to say.

[1496] He's incredible, though.

[1497] Between you and him that night, it was such an embarrassment of riches.

[1498] That was quite a party.

[1499] I love that.

[1500] Yeah.

[1501] The Ferris Middle Ridge is what a beautiful way to say.

[1502] But it was so nice meeting you there, and I'm so glad you came in and chatted with us.

[1503] And I hope everyone checks you out on tour.

[1504] Where do people go to get tickets?

[1505] Petty Swims .com probably.

[1506] That's a good website to have.

[1507] You didn't have to do like Teddy Swim.

[1508] Teddy Swim sings like that could have been a backoff.

[1509] You're right.

[1510] Is he swimming or singing?

[1511] Dot E .U. Actually, one night, first time I ever met Max Martin.

[1512] I was working with my buddy Johan, the last story I'll tell you.

[1513] We're eating food and Max comes in and I was so stoked.

[1514] Max Martin's the biggest produce ever, right?

[1515] And so my buddy Johan says, hey, Max, I'd like you to eat somebody.

[1516] This is Teddy.

[1517] Teddy Swims.

[1518] And he gave me this look like, does he?

[1519] Like, as he saw my stature.

[1520] He's like, no, Teddy Swims is his name.

[1521] He's a singer.

[1522] He goes, this is my daughter.

[1523] This is Doris, Doris Bicycle.

[1524] Oh, that's great.

[1525] Because to be in his house, I must be damn good at swimming.

[1526] But 5, 7, 260 pounds.

[1527] There's no fucking way that guy's a fucking gold champion.

[1528] Does he?

[1529] Oh, that's hilarious.

[1530] This is my friend.

[1531] Have you worked with him?

[1532] I have not worked with next.

[1533] Do you have a dream collab?

[1534] Yeah, man. Adele, certainly.

[1535] Oh, you guys would be great together.

[1536] Of course, Stevie, Paul McCartney, while they're still here.

[1537] We're gonna manifest that.

[1538] I like that pick, Adele.

[1539] Me too.

[1540] Yeah, she's the fucking one, though.

[1541] John Mayer?

[1542] Yeah.

[1543] I got a chance to write with him one time.

[1544] Oh, you did?

[1545] Yeah, but we kind of wrote a couple of choruses and I spent a day with him and it was just beautiful, bro.

[1546] He's fucking cool.

[1547] I love it.

[1548] I love him and she love him.

[1549] I'm going to have him tattooed on your leg soon.

[1550] Yeah.

[1551] All right, Teddy.

[1552] Great having you in.

[1553] Thanks so much for coming.

[1554] Everybody go see you on tour.

[1555] Go to teddy swims .com.

[1556] Be well.

[1557] Stay tuned for the facts check so you can hear all the facts that were wrong.

[1558] We have numbers?

[1559] Mm -hmm.

[1560] Okay.

[1561] It sucks that Rob's not here because I saw this in the comments.

[1562] And could this possibly be true?

[1563] It said loved seeing Wobbywob on Celebrity Family Feud.

[1564] Yeah, he told us he did that.

[1565] He did?

[1566] Yeah.

[1567] I feel like I would definitely remember that.

[1568] Yeah, he did it with, I think, Rachel Billson's show.

[1569] Oh, okay, okay, okay.

[1570] Did he win money, prizes?

[1571] That I don't know.

[1572] What if he had a new car when he came to work?

[1573] That would be cool.

[1574] Can you win a new car on Celebrity Family Feud?

[1575] Or do you probably have to play for a charity if you're doing celebrity, right?

[1576] It should be.

[1577] Like, Wheel of Fortune.

[1578] I almost call it Spin the World.

[1579] wheel but I think that was the show I was on yeah was it mine was just maybe called the wheel no I think it was spin the wheel no because he also had the wall what do you owe me oh oh um cake or something yeah I'll buy you big big cake okay I think it's called the wheel I'm hoping it's I think the more I say I think it's called the wheel as you search it that'll up the odds that I was spin the wheel it is yep spin the wheel 2019 there you are that's you but hold on hold on spin the wheel was are saying.

[1580] No. It wasn't called the wheel.

[1581] No, look.

[1582] Look at the Wikipedia.

[1583] Oh, yeah, it says spin the wheel.

[1584] Oh, God.

[1585] Boy, that was a rough.

[1586] I had a hard time surrendering.

[1587] Yeah, you did.

[1588] I'm there now, though.

[1589] Okay, but anyways, how exciting Wabiwob was on Family Feud.

[1590] Well, I think we should ask him if he won.

[1591] I'm sure I asked, and I don't remember.

[1592] Yeah, what do you think you'd be more prone to remember than he was a big winner or a big loser?

[1593] Big winner.

[1594] He would remember if he was a big loser.

[1595] We all would.

[1596] No, I think he would remember if he was a big loser, but the world would remember if he was a big winner.

[1597] That's a nice way to think of it.

[1598] Yeah.

[1599] I don't know if it's just, I think we all take loss as pretty hard as my point.

[1600] Personally, though, that's what I'm saying, but the rest of us don't.

[1601] No, we don't care.

[1602] We like people more when they lose.

[1603] That's the funny thing.

[1604] Not really.

[1605] I don't think so.

[1606] Okay.

[1607] Because I saw some other stuff yesterday.

[1608] Rob was in another game show they didn't tell us about?

[1609] No. Well, I talked about it unsinked just now, so it feels.

[1610] redundant, but I did find some other comments on another person's page, not ours, because I know not to look at ours.

[1611] I got to say while you're on that topic, the comments are getting so funny now because they say, I just read them this morning, it says, Monica, I love your outfit, I hope you're not reading this.

[1612] Now they're all like, I love your outfit, I hope you're not reading this.

[1613] It's an interesting thing we've invented, kind of, I think.

[1614] I don't think any other comments go that way.

[1615] I appreciate those people who are doing that.

[1616] And I'm not seeing it.

[1617] Well, a lot of people really loved your outfit from the Moonschalzen episode.

[1618] Oh, my black shirt.

[1619] Oh, here's a thing.

[1620] This is a theater.

[1621] No, continue on with the comments you read.

[1622] And then earmark other comments I read.

[1623] Okay.

[1624] So I went to a new dermatologist yesterday all the way in Santa Monica.

[1625] I'm sorry, esthetician, all the way in Santa Monica.

[1626] Yes.

[1627] I'm not sure if she's a dermatologist or an esthetician.

[1628] Yeah, who knows.

[1629] Everyone plays it kind of fast and loose.

[1630] She's all the way in Santa Monica, but worth it, worth the trip.

[1631] I also, you know, I always do this figuring out of hacks of time.

[1632] So I went early and then I stayed in Santa Monica until 8.

[1633] The whole night.

[1634] Yeah.

[1635] What did you do?

[1636] I met Molly for a quick, like, hour after, and then she had to leave and then I just worked.

[1637] Okay.

[1638] And where did you eat somewhere fun?

[1639] Did you eat at R &D?

[1640] No, we went to Baltair, which is in Brent.

[1641] Wood.

[1642] That's where Molly and I met.

[1643] And then I just stayed at Balterre for another two hours.

[1644] Loitering.

[1645] Yeah, I was loitering.

[1646] At first I had my computer out and then that felt like it wasn't the right space for that.

[1647] Right.

[1648] So I just, I did it via my phone.

[1649] Oh, wow.

[1650] So yeah.

[1651] Anywho, but then it was great because it was only 30 minutes home and then I stopped for a go Greek.

[1652] Oh, in Beverly Hills.

[1653] No. In Studio City.

[1654] Oh, it's open.

[1655] Yeah.

[1656] It's so good.

[1657] Oh, wow.

[1658] And I'm PMM.

[1659] messing.

[1660] Okay, congratulations.

[1661] Thank you.

[1662] Things have been so topsy -turvy.

[1663] I feel very overwhelmed and stressed out.

[1664] Okay.

[1665] I also feel really clumsy.

[1666] Oh, yeah.

[1667] Like everything's falling down.

[1668] Right.

[1669] I've been meaning to tell you.

[1670] What?

[1671] You broke something?

[1672] I scratched the whole side of my car.

[1673] Oh, I'm sorry.

[1674] Yeah.

[1675] I've been trying to want it.

[1676] You drug it along something.

[1677] I was pulling out of the gas station and there was that pole.

[1678] Oh, wow.

[1679] And I thought I could get through because there was someone behind me. And then I couldn't get through.

[1680] And I am annoyed by my beautiful car that I do love so much.

[1681] Yeah.

[1682] I am annoyed by it because it beeps at everything except when I hit my car.

[1683] Well, to be fair to the car, it has sensors on the bumpers in front and then back.

[1684] Why not on the side?

[1685] Because no one's really side swiping things.

[1686] Oh, they're parallel parking.

[1687] Okay.

[1688] All the time.

[1689] Don't you also just come to ignore all the beeping?

[1690] Because I think the beeping, like, although well -intention, people just end up filing it into white noise.

[1691] It could have, I could do that.

[1692] If I'm in a car, of course all minds are turned off.

[1693] I can't stand all those detection things.

[1694] Yeah.

[1695] Like, leave it to me, you know.

[1696] I can handle myself.

[1697] Yeah, but when I'm in a rental car and someone else's car and they have all that shit, I just, I don't even listen.

[1698] It's overly cautious.

[1699] Well, except not when it counts.

[1700] Side swiping side.

[1701] Yeah, it doesn't have any sensors.

[1702] Because think if you opened your door would start beeping, I don't know.

[1703] I don't know why.

[1704] It seems like at this point, they should be able to know when you're about to hit a pole.

[1705] Hit a pole, yeah.

[1706] Did it dent it or just scrape it?

[1707] I think it's just scraped.

[1708] I honestly haven't looked too hard because I'm too stressed.

[1709] That's a good method.

[1710] Often, if I scratch my wheels parallel parking, I don't let myself look at it when I get out of the car.

[1711] I just carry on with whatever I'm going to do because if it's in my head, when I get to wherever I'm going, is this going to ruin my whole thing?

[1712] And I have succeeded sometimes in forgetting to even look at it.

[1713] And then weeks later, I'm like, ooh, that rim's fucked up.

[1714] Sure.

[1715] But now it's like someone else did it.

[1716] Oh, God.

[1717] Okay, yeah, so whatever.

[1718] That's part of the PMS.

[1719] And, of course, you know, I was like, of course this happened because I don't know how I'm functioning.

[1720] Like, I feel crazy.

[1721] Yeah.

[1722] It is.

[1723] They're getting worse.

[1724] They're getting bigger.

[1725] I think.

[1726] perimenopause.

[1727] No, I know you read that book, but you're not there yet, okay?

[1728] There'll be plenty of time for you to be peripal.

[1729] Perimenopausal.

[1730] Perimenopausal.

[1731] I know, but it seems odd that they're getting worse and blood's getting less, but the symptoms are getting worse.

[1732] Like, it's not great.

[1733] It's not great.

[1734] Anyway, you're at my apartment right now.

[1735] Right.

[1736] I just wanted to say behind the curtain, because we're doing work on the attic.

[1737] Yes.

[1738] We record.

[1739] here and you said I need to warn you my house is a disaster and then I just walked in and there's a lot of cargo in the living room there's tons of huge boxes some say bounty on them not a sponsor but let's give you a free plug bounty paper towel there's a huge box of paper towels and then an enormous box of toilet paper like enough for barracks of an army base and I didn't mean to do this yes and you told me you didn't realize the quantity was so big but I was actually envious and I'm like I can't find that quantity on Amazon.

[1740] And then I was like, is there a portal for like big box shopping on Amazon that you wandered into accidentally where all the units are like 100 plus?

[1741] Anyways, you had a very funny joke because there's a lot of boxes.

[1742] And then I said, oh, I'm going to grab something to drink.

[1743] You said, oh, let me get it for you.

[1744] You didn't want me to go into the kitchen's not great.

[1745] And then when I was in the kitchen, you said, are you going to call in a wellness check?

[1746] Yeah.

[1747] I'm not going to call in a wellness check.

[1748] But then When I sat down on the couch, I noticed you don't have a shade on your lamp.

[1749] Okay, that really worried you.

[1750] Well, that, I'll tell you why.

[1751] Yeah.

[1752] That looks like you were fucking partying.

[1753] Like, that looks like you're drinking hard in here and, like, lamps got knocked over.

[1754] So that, to me, signals a different thing, muscle memory.

[1755] Interesting.

[1756] Although, of course, you didn't do that.

[1757] But when you add in all the boxes and the other stuff, and then there's, like, I think the lampshade got broken last night, then it looks a little bit more like you've been in here for four or five days drinking.

[1758] Or shooting up.

[1759] Well, no, you're very docile when you shoot up.

[1760] You would have just sat on the couch.

[1761] You wouldn't have made this be a mess.

[1762] Okay, well, the lampshade is aesthetics because I got a beautiful lamp.

[1763] I was just afraid to say fucking anything, but I have a beautiful lampshade that I got when I was in New York earlier this year.

[1764] And it has a pattern.

[1765] And the lamp shade that was on this lamp that you are noting, which is a table lamp, also had a beautiful pattern.

[1766] but they don't go to get it's too much beautiful pattern so I had to take one off it's too busy I got you okay this meticulous style like well yeah it requires a lot of tinkering and also one of those boxes is a food processor from Prime Day oh really yeah they had a bargain and you oh yeah that was exciting oh wonderful okay now back to I went to the dermatologist yeah I found this person from another podcast to niche, which I have shouted out on here.

[1767] Yes.

[1768] Remember, because I said, I was surprised by the way the host looked because I had a whole vision in my head and then they didn't match that, which was funny.

[1769] It's just funny when you have an idea in your head and then it doesn't match up.

[1770] Yes.

[1771] In which I immediately followed with, I assume this happens all the time to me, which is interesting.

[1772] Yeah.

[1773] All to say, when I said that on that episode, they took that clip.

[1774] And they did a video of them reacting to it, which was very funny.

[1775] Uh -huh.

[1776] And they're great.

[1777] I love them.

[1778] They posted that and, you know, that's that.

[1779] So then when I went to the dermatologist, I came back, I DM'd the host of that show because she had shouted out this place.

[1780] And I said, you know, I just tried this place that you recommended and thanks for recommending it, basically.

[1781] And so when I was on the page, I saw that video again.

[1782] And I was like, oh, yeah, that was funny.

[1783] And I clicked it.

[1784] And then?

[1785] You got into the comments.

[1786] Yeah.

[1787] And they were so mean.

[1788] Oh, they were.

[1789] Oh, to them or to you?

[1790] To you.

[1791] Oh, my God, Monica.

[1792] I'm very sorry.

[1793] Classic insufferable Monica.

[1794] Oh, my God.

[1795] Me and stuff.

[1796] Mean stuff.

[1797] And I'm already feeling sensitive and topsy -turvy and wellness checky.

[1798] Uh -huh, too many paper towel, too much toilet paper, no lambshades.

[1799] It wasn't the time for me to see that.

[1800] When was that yesterday?

[1801] Yeah, yesterday, right?

[1802] Oh, boy.

[1803] Okay.

[1804] Yeah.

[1805] Okay.

[1806] Well, we're going to get through all this.

[1807] We are.

[1808] We're in a moment of processing all this and we're going to get right through it.

[1809] I haven't had therapy since all of this has happened and I'm seeing her on Saturday and I'm sure she'll help.

[1810] Okay, now here's one that's a debate because, again, these go either way from me, right?

[1811] Like so I think those CD comments were really warranted and I was very grateful to have gotten that criticism.

[1812] And then we got the expert and it was wonderful.

[1813] So everything worked out that way.

[1814] But I saw a handful of comments this morning on the Moon Chosen episode.

[1815] And several people were like, this should have had a trigger warning.

[1816] And I was a little bit like the fucking episodes Moonshausen by proxy.

[1817] Like how can you go?

[1818] Like I don't understand how if I go see Friday the 13th.

[1819] I don't need a. Trigger warning.

[1820] This is what it is.

[1821] Yeah.

[1822] That seems ridiculous.

[1823] Yeah.

[1824] Yeah.

[1825] So I guess I didn't agree with that.

[1826] Yeah.

[1827] I mean, it was just a reminder that the internet is a scary place.

[1828] I don't like it there.

[1829] It's a dangerous place.

[1830] I really don't like it there.

[1831] I think eventually in life, not right now.

[1832] Uh -huh.

[1833] You'll leave there.

[1834] I think I'm going to not be on there forever.

[1835] Yeah.

[1836] Look, I'm on there and I love it.

[1837] And I also think that a better version of myself would exist without it and probably everyone.

[1838] We just think we'd feel so peaceful.

[1839] Yeah.

[1840] How about what would you miss?

[1841] So you got to DM the hosts of that and that's great.

[1842] I loved that.

[1843] Like using it as a phone book is radical.

[1844] Yeah.

[1845] Or like I started following, of course, George Kittle today.

[1846] And I wrote him a really lengthy DM about how radical I think he is.

[1847] Yeah.

[1848] And so that's lovely.

[1849] I want to be able to do that.

[1850] Well, it's nice to share positive things.

[1851] Like, of course, anytime anyone is able to share anything positive or thank people.

[1852] Yes, that's great, but it is not used for that most of the time.

[1853] And it just, it bums me out personally, of course, but it really, I get very heady about humanity.

[1854] Right.

[1855] And that's not good for me to think the world is bad and that people are bad.

[1856] I wonder if there's been like some big meta analysis of what percentage are bad.

[1857] I'd be curious because I think it's, yeah, mean or bad or negative.

[1858] Because I think it's probably, as we know, we've had.

[1859] neurologists explain this like the chemicals for negativity are stronger than right nine people say I love you one person says you're a bitch it's a stronger chemical response yeah so I wonder if it's outweighed in our head and it's actually smaller like let's just say theoretically they did this huge analysis and they found only 7 % of stuff on Instagram was negative it's still I don't You don't like him.

[1860] It might be smaller.

[1861] I'm just suggesting it might be smaller than we think.

[1862] I'm sure it.

[1863] I don't think it is.

[1864] It's a breeding ground for people who might not in life behave that way, but for some reason, this anonymity.

[1865] And I think it brings out the worst in people.

[1866] Well, it's like how people behave in a car as well.

[1867] Right.

[1868] Yeah.

[1869] That's a very fascinating one.

[1870] It is.

[1871] And some people, you know, of course, again, you're right.

[1872] There's like so many nice people on there.

[1873] There's so many people there are like, no, she's just kidding or like whatever, a lot of defense, which is sweet.

[1874] But then even that, even when you say, this is why you can't take any of it because, first of all, it's a roller coaster.

[1875] You're like, oh, that's nice.

[1876] Oh, my God, that's horrible.

[1877] Like, it's too much.

[1878] And there's like one person who said, no, no, no. I like that you have a voice picked out for her.

[1879] Yeah, yeah, you already have a voice picked up.

[1880] Because it was nice, but she said, she told.

[1881] delivers things weird, but she means well.

[1882] Oh, okay.

[1883] That's actually not helpful.

[1884] Yeah, and then, of course, and I'm like, do I deliver things weird?

[1885] Like, what is happening?

[1886] Now, I will tell you this.

[1887] Okay.

[1888] You're not interested in my approach to all this, but I'm going to tell it to you.

[1889] So, like, when I'm on other people's things, like, I was on Theo Vaughn's podcast.

[1890] I'm not going to dare look at those comments.

[1891] I was on Peter Attia's.

[1892] I'm not going to dare.

[1893] Like, I saw his post of our interview and I'm like, stay away.

[1894] Because people don't love you.

[1895] Well, because they're there for that host.

[1896] And then I also, this could be my story, but I also think a lot of people on the right think I'm like a super far left liberal.

[1897] And so I'm just immediately, no matter what I say, I'm a libt hard perpetuating this terrible.

[1898] So I just know in an audience, like if I go on a show or an audience, is more right -leaning, I just don't even, I would never even glance at that because I just assume a couple hundred of those listeners are just going to, it's a great opportunity to sound off about the left.

[1899] In those instances, I do choose to think, well, Theo's got a million listeners, and I bet most of them just liked it because we like each other.

[1900] Yeah.

[1901] And then there's going to be this handful that are going to come out hard because it's sitting right there.

[1902] Cut it all.

[1903] Anyway, so.

[1904] Anywho.

[1905] Oh.

[1906] Oh, so see, that's someone in their car, laying on their horn.

[1907] They're so mad.

[1908] And they would never in line at a grocery store, going, eh?

[1909] Like, they wouldn't just yell.

[1910] Yeah.

[1911] I did get really paranoid.

[1912] The person who said I was insufferable and then it had like 22 hearts.

[1913] I clicked on her.

[1914] Okay.

[1915] And she was private, so I couldn't, like, really see much.

[1916] But then I was, like, looking at her picture and trying to, you know, I've become crazy.

[1917] Who the enemy is?

[1918] Yeah, you've got to identify who to look out for.

[1919] These things, it's so contagious in such a negative way.

[1920] So, yeah, I'm looking at her, and then I thought, what if this person is one of the people who's come up to me and said something nice?

[1921] Oh, sure.

[1922] Then I started to get paranoid about all the people who come up and say nice things.

[1923] I'm like, well, what if they're nice in person?

[1924] Because people are nice in person.

[1925] Sure.

[1926] Then they're alter ego.

[1927] Yeah.

[1928] Yeah.

[1929] Kitch Witch.

[1930] Your sister?

[1931] Why did I think that's Callie's?

[1932] What's hers?

[1933] Kitch Witch was your sister's cooking thing.

[1934] Yeah, what's Callie's?

[1935] K -watch.

[1936] So close.

[1937] There's a W and a C and an H and a K. She's private, though, so don't follow her.

[1938] Okay.

[1939] Well, you could apply.

[1940] That's how you do it when someone's private.

[1941] You apply to be their friend.

[1942] I've applied to many people's.

[1943] Me too.

[1944] Yeah.

[1945] I actually think it's.

[1946] fun because then you're accepted it's harder to get yeah can I bore you with one update that's very long overdue but but people so deserve to finally hear an explanation because um god bless the f1 listeners we had a really really wonderful fan base for that show that was super supportive and they really liked it and we really enjoyed we got to meet a ton of them when we went to the race and stuff and of course we didn't do it this season and so many people were I don't want to say up.

[1947] You know, they wanted the show, understandably.

[1948] And obviously, now that we've announced that we're going to Wondry, because of the nature of when that show would have started and ended, I would have been in the middle of a contract if I had resumed it for a second season.

[1949] It would have hugely impacted armchair.

[1950] Expert.

[1951] That's the show we're currently on.

[1952] Yeah, that's our show.

[1953] I also couldn't talk about that for the last four months while that was all happening and people were getting more and more agitated why there was no explanation.

[1954] So my deepest apologies, that's what was going on.

[1955] Additionally, I'll add I did get a kind of a cease and desist letter from Formula One in the midst of all this.

[1956] Really?

[1957] Yes, yes.

[1958] I almost want to read you my response to the lawyers.

[1959] But we got this long letter from their lawyers basically saying that the name of our show can't be F -1 because there's a trademark on F -1, which, by the way, it's E -F -F -F.

[1960] W -O -N.

[1961] So they insisted we take down all of our videos.

[1962] And I wrote back one of my, once a year I write a really mean email.

[1963] This year was twice.

[1964] Well, I sent your neighbor quite a heavy -handed one, as you recall.

[1965] Yeah.

[1966] But then I sent them one that was just basically like, we're promoting your show with our love and giving all of our attention and resources to promote.

[1967] your product and this is the response.

[1968] I know.

[1969] I don't, I think it's very short -sighted.

[1970] Charlie and I were obsessed with this cease and desist letter.

[1971] I'm like, how do you explain this?

[1972] Do they have an official F -1 podcast?

[1973] No. That would be the only thing would be we have this.

[1974] This is pulling from that.

[1975] Right.

[1976] No, we were just something then added a totally different fan base to that sport as well.

[1977] Because once again, even F1.

[1978] one tilted female, just like armchair does.

[1979] That's interesting.

[1980] Yeah, so my letter was like, you're welcome and we'll see you.

[1981] Yeah, kind of, you know.

[1982] That's a bummer.

[1983] Yeah.

[1984] So that was going on.

[1985] There was a legal thing, and then there was also our contractual thing.

[1986] And so my many apologies, that is the explanation.

[1987] And, you know, TBD, if we do it down the road, we'll see.

[1988] Cool.

[1989] Yeah.

[1990] Cool.

[1991] Was there something?

[1992] You said earmark something.

[1993] The trigger warning, I wanted to earmark.

[1994] Did I earmark?

[1995] Something else as well?

[1996] Oh, my God.

[1997] This is going to be a useless story to tell because really it only matters if you see the photographic evidence.

[1998] So I haven't seen Nate Tuck in a while.

[1999] Nate Tuck has really become my medicine.

[2000] That's nice.

[2001] Yeah, like if I'm feeling like I'm in the doldrums and I just can't break out of like I need to get enthusiastic about life again and I'm having a hard time.

[2002] One breakfast with that son of a bitch.

[2003] That sets me straight for like two weeks.

[2004] So yesterday, completely random.

[2005] This was a total shot in the dark.

[2006] I said, I am mad at myself.

[2007] I didn't see bad boys and I really want to see it before it leaves to the movie theater.

[2008] Any chance you could go today.

[2009] This was yesterday.

[2010] And he's said, oh my God, I can.

[2011] So we met at Americana at 4 p .m. It's so fun to go meet him at the movies at 4 p .m. Also, it's hot as Haiti's in L .A. Everyone needs to know.

[2012] So I was also like, I want to beat the heat.

[2013] I love, I get really in the movie.

[2014] mood to go to the movie theater.

[2015] You and Kristen love to say beat the heat.

[2016] You got to beat the heat.

[2017] It's imperative.

[2018] And so I have so much muscle memory from not having air conditioning and spending my whole day at the AMC 7 in Santa Monica to beat the heat.

[2019] I buy one ticket and then I go right into every single theater without pain.

[2020] Yeah.

[2021] So we go there and clearly other people are there to beat the heat too because we get in there and at first we have the entire movie theater to ourselves, which is so fun.

[2022] We're so excited to be in there completely by ourselves.

[2023] And then some older gal.

[2024] wanders in and I mean right away it doesn't look like she's there for bad boys it definitely looks like she's there to beat the heat and then she had probably came from another movie that just ended because she came about five minutes late okay and then she just sat down in the very first seat that was offered you know the first seat coming out of the hallway yeah no one would pick that seat in an empty movie theater okay there's a lot of clues here okay she sat down and then within seven or eight minutes she was out cold she was beating the heat by going yes i mean i'm talking dead asleep and there was one point where the action got so loud that in her sleep she covered her ears and you're not going to like this but of course i started taking pictures and it's not a good look for me to do that but tell me you're not happy i did this i want you to scroll to the left okay there was a couple times where we thought she passed as you can and seeing the photos.

[2025] This is why this story's not very good because, of course, I'm not going to post these pictures.

[2026] Okay, but now, do you find that where she's sleeping with her hands over her ears because there's tons of gunfire and explosives going up?

[2027] She's so upset, but her sleep is getting disrupted.

[2028] And then the worst was I kept, I had to take, every time she changed position.

[2029] She looks so hot.

[2030] Yes, thank you.

[2031] You agree, right?

[2032] Our assessment is spot on.

[2033] She was like, doing her.

[2034] her best to beat the heat.

[2035] She's got a fucking Gatorade bottle in her drink holder.

[2036] She's so sweaty.

[2037] She is.

[2038] Yeah.

[2039] And she kept getting more and more slunk over in the chair.

[2040] So I was taking pictures and I had taken three or four and it went great.

[2041] I just had to hold the camera really still because it's dark in the movie theater.

[2042] Sure.

[2043] But then one time my flash went off.

[2044] And then we like panicked.

[2045] But she didn't notice at all.

[2046] And you guys were the only other people?

[2047] Yes.

[2048] It's just night and I. And this woman who's Maybe passing.

[2049] And then the end, movie's over, we, we stand up and we're leaving and we've got to walk right by her.

[2050] Because again, she sat in the very first seat out of the hallway.

[2051] And now the young boy who works at the theater's there with his broom and his.

[2052] He has to shake her awake.

[2053] Exactly.

[2054] So Nate and I, we start chatting with the guy.

[2055] We're like, what's your plan here?

[2056] Are you allowed to touch her?

[2057] You're going to have to touch her.

[2058] No. He's going to have to.

[2059] He's going to have to get close to.

[2060] ma 'am yes he's gonna do all that and then she's just gonna in her sleep cover her ears and he's gonna have to touch her and he's like 17 you know he's a teenager but where is the best place to touch someone to wake them up the shoulder we talked about that oh you did yeah you're like you gotta poke it just same way that guy poked me at the gas station you're gonna just give him a poke to the shoulder well that did not go well no but I wasn't asleep at the movie theater I actually my instinct is the knee that's too close to the The vagina, yeah, yeah.

[2061] You're like, you're touching her legs.

[2062] Shoulders like the...

[2063] But shoulders close to the breast.

[2064] Well, no. It's, I think it's the most standard place, point of contact with a stranger.

[2065] But then one of his fingers slips into the nipple.

[2066] Like, if someone's about to cut you off, like, you're walking, there's going to be a collision and you've got to actually, like, touch them.

[2067] You always grab their shoulders.

[2068] Go for the knees.

[2069] Grab their inner thighs.

[2070] Yeah, interesting.

[2071] Oh, we loved it.

[2072] Like, this is the exact type of thing.

[2073] that makes Nate and I so happy.

[2074] Just thinking about this young boy.

[2075] What a gift for you.

[2076] Yeah, we had a lot of gifts.

[2077] We love Dane, Eric Dane.

[2078] He's so handsome.

[2079] Friend of the pot.

[2080] Check him out.

[2081] Yeah, if you've missed him.

[2082] I was at the Americana two days before that.

[2083] Seen a movie?

[2084] I wasn't beating the heat.

[2085] I was in the heat.

[2086] I sat outside to work in the heat.

[2087] You don't really need to beat the heat as much as us northern Europeans do.

[2088] Well, I know you like to blame it on that.

[2089] I do.

[2090] Even though I think it's just, a high tolerance.

[2091] I know.

[2092] You wanted to be like, you earned it.

[2093] Well, I do have a high tolerance.

[2094] When I got my chin filler and also yesterday, when I went to my new dermatologist's estetician.

[2095] Did you get more filler?

[2096] This is the slippery slope of filler.

[2097] I didn't.

[2098] She doesn't do that.

[2099] But you're going weekly now for a filler.

[2100] No. She doesn't do that.

[2101] But she was doing extractions on my face a lot.

[2102] Oh, was it awesome?

[2103] Well, it is, but, you know, it does hurt.

[2104] Because they're putting a needle deep in there?

[2105] Well, they put a needle.

[2106] first, but then they like push it.

[2107] Yeah.

[2108] That's disgusting.

[2109] But she was like, I can't believe you're handling this like this.

[2110] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[2111] And then also that's what they said with the chin filler.

[2112] So I feel that.

[2113] And you're cheerleading.

[2114] Yeah.

[2115] I feel that I have a high pain threshold.

[2116] Yeah, yeah.

[2117] And so I can also beat the heat on my own.

[2118] But hold on a second.

[2119] I think you're conflating two things.

[2120] Nope.

[2121] Are you in pain while you're outside?

[2122] Sometimes.

[2123] You, because when I see you out there baking in my backyard.

[2124] Yeah.

[2125] You're happy.

[2126] No, I'm happy.

[2127] Yeah.

[2128] When I'm in the same situation, I'm sweating bullets and I'm like, I got to get to the movie theater.

[2129] No, I'm sweating.

[2130] Like, I was sweating so much in homes.

[2131] I mean, it's just an open tap.

[2132] Like, oh.

[2133] Speaking of the devil.

[2134] And what a nice display of your clumsiness.

[2135] That bottle is so far from you and you just knocked it over.

[2136] I know.

[2137] Yeah.

[2138] You'd almost have to use your leg to reach it and you somehow did.

[2139] I still did it.

[2140] Anyway, it's painful, but I can do it.

[2141] it and I like it.

[2142] Okay.

[2143] All right.

[2144] I have a very high pain tolerance too.

[2145] Yeah.

[2146] But I didn't earn it.

[2147] I just have it.

[2148] Well, I earn mine.

[2149] Oh, okay.

[2150] Yours is an accomplishment.

[2151] Yeah, exactly.

[2152] Because it is not that it doesn't hurt.

[2153] It's that I'm unwilling to say it hurts.

[2154] Oh, my God.

[2155] This is, yeah, did I tell you this great conversation, Lincoln and I had on the trip about fear.

[2156] I told you I looked up and I saw her, like, on the fourth floor going on the outside of the balcony.

[2157] Yes, yes, yes.

[2158] And I waited a few days to bring that up because it's never a good idea right away because you're likely to embarrass the child.

[2159] So I eventually said a few days later, I said, hey, I happened to catch your stunt work and I'm all for it.

[2160] I think it's radical.

[2161] I said, I want you to just add in, I want you to, I want you to lean on that pole on the balcony side first.

[2162] I want you to test your equipment like you're a stunt person.

[2163] Like get up on that balcony and lean with all your weight and jerk towards the balcony before you go out on the outside and just trust that it's going to, all I'm asking is you add in some safety measures for these fun adventures.

[2164] So she's like, okay, she took it kind of well.

[2165] But then we were on a long walk through Copenhagen and she started.

[2166] really started getting in her head about it and we had this long talk she's like I just started getting afraid of everything like I'm so scared of everything when I think about how I'm afraid of everything and I said honey I'm completely afraid of everything I'm I think I'm probably the scariest person you actually know all this stuff I do is a reaction to the fact that I'm I'm very scared of everything I'm a scaredy cat yeah I said when I watched the documentary about Moto GP and I saw the guy's dragging their knee on the ground at 130 miles an hour.

[2167] I was sitting there going, that is so fucking scary.

[2168] Why are they doing that?

[2169] It's so scary.

[2170] I have to do it because the only thing for me worse than being scared is being controlled by something.

[2171] Being controlled by something is my absolute worst feeling.

[2172] Yeah.

[2173] And it has led to all of this ostensible bravery.

[2174] I was so afraid of fist fighting more than all the other kids I knew but I couldn't be controlled by that fear and she goes oh my God that is exactly what I'm doing too that's why I got to go on the outside of the thing because I hate that I'm so afraid of it and I don't want to be controlled by it and then I was wondering how much of people who are daredevils that's in the mix it doesn't seem so for like Sean White He just seems to be completely fearless.

[2175] Yeah.

[2176] But I wonder what subset are like me and Lincoln, which is like, we're doing things, but we're actually doing them for a completely different reason.

[2177] Yeah.

[2178] I bet a lot.

[2179] And it sounds like your chin thing because I can relate.

[2180] Like when I get tattoos, I go, yeah, that's annoying and it's painful.

[2181] Yeah.

[2182] But I refuse to be controlled by it or dominated by it.

[2183] And so I will overpower and ignore it.

[2184] Yeah.

[2185] I mean, I think there's multiple things always at play.

[2186] For her, it's interesting because I. I definitely understand you with being controlled because you were in situations where you had no control.

[2187] But so she must have her own things around control that you may not know, she may not know yet.

[2188] This is the weird privilege of having kids that starts to challenge your story.

[2189] So again, I, yes, I think I don't like to be controlled because of the stepdad's and stuff.

[2190] But I might genetically be that way.

[2191] Yeah.

[2192] And she might genetically be the way.

[2193] There's so many.

[2194] It's not just one or the other.

[2195] Sure, sure, sure.

[2196] Sure.

[2197] Some ratio.

[2198] Yeah.

[2199] And I think for me with pain, the original thing was, you don't want to cause any ripples in the ocean so that the more chances of getting removed.

[2200] Yeah.

[2201] But now it's more like I want the result.

[2202] So I don't care about what it takes to get there.

[2203] I mean, I push through a lot across life in general.

[2204] I'll do a lot of things that I think people wouldn't do or stand for.

[2205] or do whatever because I want the result and I can see that.

[2206] I can always see the end.

[2207] Yes.

[2208] Which also probably cheerleading was a big thing.

[2209] Like, yeah, this sucks.

[2210] Like there's so much of it sucked.

[2211] Practice sucked.

[2212] Weight training sucked.

[2213] But you know why you're doing it.

[2214] And then that works.

[2215] Right.

[2216] You know, you see it.

[2217] Yeah, you're right.

[2218] There's a million ways to skin that cat, I guess.

[2219] Yeah, it's not so simple.

[2220] No. But I'm shocked pretty regularly about just to have witnessed how much of my stuff Lincoln has.

[2221] Yeah, that is interesting.

[2222] Without a remotely similar childhood.

[2223] And just more often than not, I'm going like, oh, wow, I'm giving my story a ton of credit.

[2224] It probably only deserves some.

[2225] Yeah, exactly.

[2226] That's true, I think.

[2227] Okay, well, this is for Teddy Swims.

[2228] Oh, Teddy Swims.

[2229] Sweet, sweet Teddy Swims.

[2230] Very sweet.

[2231] He brought up Covington, Georgia.

[2232] Mm -hmm.

[2233] And he said there's a lot of filming that's happening there.

[2234] It reminded me that my first acting credit ever is Drop Dead Diva that was shot in Peachtree City.

[2235] It was a lifetime show.

[2236] I think I had two lines.

[2237] And you did that while you were still living in Georgia?

[2238] Yeah.

[2239] After I graduated and I had an agent there, I worked there for a year and that was my first TV credit.

[2240] And did you join SAG from that?

[2241] No, it took a while.

[2242] Okay.

[2243] You got eligible from that maybe.

[2244] Yes, exactly.

[2245] Do you do any commercial work there in Atlanta?

[2246] No. I did one hand modeling.

[2247] Oh, wonderful.

[2248] And dropped a Diva, maybe one other thing.

[2249] I can't remember.

[2250] Not very much.

[2251] I was only there for a year.

[2252] Maybe an industrial, maybe.

[2253] Sure.

[2254] Sounds right.

[2255] God, I should know the project that I got SAG.

[2256] I don't, though.

[2257] It might have been the herbal essence commercial.

[2258] Probably.

[2259] Probably.

[2260] Probably had to join at that point.

[2261] Yeah, must join.

[2262] you a must join must join another update on this trip lincoln said to me at one point you really got to start trimming your leg hair why well here's the thing i kind of thought my leg hair was nice is this before or after this is after yeah it looks trimmed yeah because yesterday i trimmed it with what like clippers yeah clippers it's not bald it's just it got brought down a couple Is this like the young kids, and I'm not young kids, I mean 11 are doing?

[2263] Well, she just was like, your legs are crazy.

[2264] They're so hairy.

[2265] You really got to trim them.

[2266] And I thought, all right, I'll give it a shot.

[2267] Okay.

[2268] And I did.

[2269] And I'm going to go back.

[2270] You're going to go back to hair.

[2271] Yeah, I'm going to go back to full hair.

[2272] I kind of like hairy legs.

[2273] Yeah, I don't.

[2274] I don't like this.

[2275] No, no, it looks fine.

[2276] It looks great.

[2277] But it does, first of all, I never once noticed that you had hairy legs.

[2278] which means you probably didn't.

[2279] Well, do you, I will say, I have a very incongruous hair distribution, which is I have no hair on my chest and none of my legs, I don't have much on my stomach.

[2280] I'm pretty hairless.

[2281] Cut to legs.

[2282] Legs are fully hairy.

[2283] They're inordinately hairy, especially given how hairless I am everywhere else.

[2284] All right.

[2285] Well, I'm glad you tried it.

[2286] It's always good to try things.

[2287] Fuck it.

[2288] I don't, you know, I was like, okay, I'll do this.

[2289] And then when I was doing it, my sister was in and out of the scene.

[2290] God.

[2291] Your poor sister I think she used to witness Of her brother Yeah I was doing it on the balcony of my room with Lincoln So the hair will just blow off into your house Hopefully Land in your backyard All your rats Yeah and my sister goes What's happening here?

[2292] And I said oh well Lincoln really thinks It was time for me to trim my leg hair And she said Oh what a nice father you have I used to beg Barton to cut his chest hair And he never would So I was like oh maybe this is a thing I mean kids hate how hairy their parents are It is so gross if you're young, and you're like, why are you so hairy?

[2293] Well, no, it's just life.

[2294] God, we're so mean to each other.

[2295] Ding, ding, ding.

[2296] Kids in particular, they let it rip.

[2297] Oh, yeah, I wonder if the person who wrote I was Inseparable was actually a kid.

[2298] Could have been a kid who just wanted you trim your hair.

[2299] That's right.

[2300] Okay.

[2301] He talked about the 2007 Warp Tour.

[2302] Uh -huh.

[2303] And it reminded me that Callie and I went to Warp Tour.

[2304] You did?

[2305] Uh -huh.

[2306] In 2003, I checked with her the date.

[2307] I thought maybe that was the one I'd been to.

[2308] Uh -huh.

[2309] In Atlanta?

[2310] Mm -hmm.

[2311] Was it fun?

[2312] Or were you scared?

[2313] I think I was a little scared.

[2314] Yeah.

[2315] But we also had fun.

[2316] Cali was more...

[2317] Adventurous.

[2318] Yeah, I don't know if adventurous is the word.

[2319] Okay.

[2320] But, yeah.

[2321] I guess maybe it's the word.

[2322] But she was fearless?

[2323] Is that what we're going for?

[2324] I guess.

[2325] She wasn't scared.

[2326] Right.

[2327] So adventurous.

[2328] Yeah, but she's not adventurous.

[2329] That's not a word I would ever use to describe her.

[2330] So it's...

[2331] Confident, mature.

[2332] I think she was...

[2333] A bitch.

[2334] No, I was mature.

[2335] No, she...

[2336] I think she was a little bit more spunky, maybe.

[2337] Okay, savvy?

[2338] No, I was very savvy.

[2339] Okay, she was spunky.

[2340] I forgot to mention this the other day when we were talking about Noah's birthday party, strawberry boy.

[2341] Yeah.

[2342] Max's dad, Robert, I want to shout out Robert.

[2343] Oh, interesting.

[2344] He came up to me and he said, Monica, I'm...

[2345] An arm cherry.

[2346] No. Oh, my God.

[2347] So, so sweet.

[2348] He must be such a good dad if he's an arm cherry.

[2349] He will use a very nice person.

[2350] Oh, wow.

[2351] Uh -huh, very nice.

[2352] Shout out Julie.

[2353] She also listens.

[2354] That's Max's mom.

[2355] Okay.

[2356] While we're at it, I should shout out.

[2357] Callie's dad, Dan.

[2358] He also listens.

[2359] Oh, my gosh.

[2360] I know.

[2361] All these nice parents.

[2362] Yeah.

[2363] Really nice.

[2364] Oh, I think my friend, okay, I don't mean, I guess I don't.

[2365] I think my friend Christina's parents is.

[2366] Thank you guys.

[2367] I really, it is, it is so sweet that people who are in our lives and especially parents.

[2368] I don't expect any parents to ever be listening.

[2369] Does it scare you at all?

[2370] I don't like, I don't like thinking about.

[2371] You don't think on it too hard.

[2372] Yeah, I don't want to think on it too hard, but I do think it's very kind.

[2373] Anyway, okay, oh, I wanted to play this.

[2374] Sure you get right up to their mouth on the screen.

[2375] he's so good he's so good i admire anyone who tries to do michael jackson that's why when i saw at the bull when they did the quincy jones retrospective and they had people singing the michael jackson songs i was blown away at a couple of the singers that they actually sounded better so that was impossible wow yeah yeah yeah he's so good okay i found the exact time stamp of the episode of acquired on Taylor Swift, where they start talking about the music industry.

[2376] Okay.

[2377] And I was going to listen and then recap it.

[2378] You're going to play it?

[2379] People should just, no, it's long.

[2380] It's long.

[2381] But people should listen to that because they do such a good job of breaking it all down and how little money streams make and how it's all like broken down between the songwriter and this and that.

[2382] It's very complex.

[2383] But, okay, so if you go to Acquired and you search Taylor Swift, it's, It starts because these episodes are so long.

[2384] Yeah, they're like four hours of them, right?

[2385] Yeah.

[2386] It starts at one hour, eight minutes, and 38 seconds.

[2387] So I highly recommend that.

[2388] And then we talk about Max Martin.

[2389] Max Martin, speaking of Taylor, ding, ding, ding.

[2390] What?

[2391] They've worked together.

[2392] Oh, okay.

[2393] He's just very well -known music producer, huge.

[2394] Oh, so wasn't, so was like dog or whatever, Shania Twain's husband.

[2395] He was Swedish too or Danish or something.

[2396] Yeah.

[2397] I think Swedish.

[2398] Yeah.

[2399] That's interesting.

[2400] Yes, they have a big...

[2401] You didn't meet any when you were there?

[2402] Any music producers?

[2403] Maybe that guy who was mad at me at the gas station was a huge music producer.

[2404] That would explain how, like, he thought things should be going exactly.

[2405] Was it this guy?

[2406] Fuck, that was him.

[2407] No, no, that man's much younger.

[2408] Yeah, Max Martin's 53.

[2409] We should have him on.

[2410] That would be great.

[2411] All right, well, that's it.

[2412] That's all the facts?

[2413] Yeah, let me just double check to make sure I got them all.

[2414] I talked a lot about tattoos.

[2415] Yeah.

[2416] I was going to explain to people what a tattoo is?

[2417] Yeah.

[2418] I have one interesting fact about tattoos.

[2419] Okay.

[2420] This perplexed me for like 20 years.

[2421] Once you learn that your full dermis replaces itself every few years.

[2422] Yeah.

[2423] Like no part of your skin will be here in a few years.

[2424] So how the fuck does the tattoo stay?

[2425] And I asked doctors this question.

[2426] I asked people for like 20 years.

[2427] Okay.

[2428] And finally someone explained to me that what's happening is that the ink is forever sinking.

[2429] It just sinks through every new layer of skin that comes.

[2430] Well, no, obviously it doesn't get inside and disappear.

[2431] But that it just, it sinks as the skin grows up.

[2432] Isn't that fascinating?

[2433] I don't really get it.

[2434] You don't?

[2435] I mean, I do in some ways, but...

[2436] Like, it's not...

[2437] Well, one interesting thing about that is, like, it's not fixed.

[2438] Knowing that it's sinking, it's almost shocking, it doesn't, like, get obscured more.

[2439] Right.

[2440] It's, like, not permanent.

[2441] That's what's interesting.

[2442] It's on the move.

[2443] It's like forever on the move, sinking down into these new cells that are growing up.

[2444] But just through one, each individual poor, though.

[2445] Yeah, or...

[2446] cell or however the cell works and it incorporates the sinking ink, I guess.

[2447] Should I look it up?

[2448] Let's just see.

[2449] Okay, sure.

[2450] That's one thing I never did do is search it on the internet, which is curious.

[2451] Well, I don't tattoos disappear.

[2452] Okay, this says, okay, there's AI says tattoos can be, I hate that, by the way, that now AI is the first thing you see.

[2453] Yeah, and you just don't know if it's telling you the truth or not.

[2454] but I'll read it anyway.

[2455] Tattoos can be permanent because the body's immune system and the skins dermis work together to hold onto the ink.

[2456] When a tattoo needle punctures the skin, the immune system sends macrophage cells to the wound to close it up.

[2457] The ink is a foreign invader, so the macrophages eat it up and get stuck in the dermis.

[2458] When the macrophages die, they pass the ink to the next generation of macrophages and this cycle continues indefinitely.

[2459] So that's the mechanism by by which it's sinking.

[2460] Passing onto the new cell.

[2461] Yeah, just passing through all the new layers that are coming up.

[2462] This other thing from Mad Rabbit Tattoo says, the reason tattoos last permanently is because of their location and the dermis layer of our skin, where the macrophages cells that live there, hold onto your tattoo ink and pass it to future generations of cells, like a microscopic family heirloom.

[2463] So weird.

[2464] Yeah, that's cool.

[2465] I'm glad we talked about it.

[2466] Me too.

[2467] I don't think that's like a super common curiosity.

[2468] It's just permanent.

[2469] That's that.

[2470] You hear it's permanent?

[2471] You're like, okay, next thing, next topic.

[2472] How do we beat the heat, you know?

[2473] Which we're not doing terribly well in here.

[2474] I'm telling.

[2475] It's hot in here.

[2476] I told you.

[2477] I would say that the ambient temperature in here is probably like 83.

[2478] Yeah, I live like this.

[2479] Monica, we need to get you to a pool.

[2480] Still haven't been to a pool.

[2481] All right.

[2482] Love you.

[2483] Thanks for having me over.

[2484] Bye.

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