143 - DeSabotage

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] Hey, this is exciting.

[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.

[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[5] Who killed Saz?

[6] And were they really after Charles?

[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[8] This season, murder hits close to home.

[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfenakis, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[14] Only Murders in the Building premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[15] Goodbye.

[16] Hello.

[17] And welcome.

[18] This is my favorite murder.

[19] It's a true crime comedy podcast that we do for you.

[20] bi -weekly weekly.

[21] It's weekly.

[22] Oh.

[23] Well, then the other one.

[24] Right.

[25] It's twice a week.

[26] Yeah, so twice a week, but this is the long -form version.

[27] This is the real one.

[28] The other one's fake.

[29] It's fake.

[30] It's more of a holdover.

[31] Yeah.

[32] But this is the real deal.

[33] Right.

[34] And that's Karen Kilgara.

[35] And that's Georgia Hard Stark.

[36] And that's who we are.

[37] Stephen Ray Morris is holding down the ones and two.

[38] Stephen's there.

[39] Elvis is on my lap.

[40] All is right with the world.

[41] That's right.

[42] You have your nice mug of tea.

[43] I'm literally drinking some, what Georgia described as lemon balm tea.

[44] So I hope there's a little bit of melted lip balm now.

[45] I hope that's what you gave me as a gift.

[46] My gift to you.

[47] Oh, can I tell you?

[48] You know, all these dumb tea bags with their dumb tea things and their dumb quotes and shit.

[49] Yeah.

[50] This one just says, be curious.

[51] Fuck you.

[52] We're curious about what the first.

[53] fuck lemon balm tea is also i'm going to yeah you don't don't fucking tell me because if they think that you're just like this boring person living your life and then you need tea to come tell you how to live your fucking life listen lemon balm you don't know me you don't know my family stay out of it you don't know my level of curiosity i'm up your ass i've already googled you right lemon balm tea what if your name is jonathan van ness and you have a podcast about being curious already and jonathan van ness is like i need to do more for you tea yeah he's like oh i guess i should cancel my podcast because because I'm not curious enough, according to tea.

[54] Sorry, Lemon Ball.

[55] Jesus, tea.

[56] What more do you want from our lives?

[57] Get out of our face.

[58] Hey, speaking of fall things in all the fall, living your life tea things, we'd like to give a shout out to Circleville, Ohio, and their Circleville Pumpkin Show, which is really a festival, so I don't know why they call it a show.

[59] I mean, I feel like that's part of the, part of the charm of the Circleville Pumpkin show is that they think they're a show and it you can go it's um october 17th to the 20th in circleville we're not going but you should fucking totally we would go i would love a lot of people have tweeted and said are you guys going to make a surprise i wish and i truly would do i would love nothing more but we have to go up to the pacific northwest this weekend so we can't that'll be great that'll be balmy and lemony too yeah there's going to be tons of lemon balm tea up there but please If you're anywhere near Circleville, Ohio, which means...

[60] Just near Columbus?

[61] It's Columbus.

[62] That's where it came out of our live Columbus show from last year.

[63] The Circleville Pumpkin murders.

[64] No, the Circleville letter.

[65] The letter writer.

[66] The mysterious letter writer.

[67] I then did for drunk history.

[68] Oh, right.

[69] But I forgot while you were telling the story.

[70] That's how drunk I was.

[71] You had a recovered drunk memory, which is the best.

[72] Everyone to know if the show is real.

[73] If people really get drunk on it, just know I couldn't remember that I had.

[74] had done that I had to remember the story until you were like this is hold on a second I'm having horrible memories of this um and just in in case you are in if you're a pageant person um you can run for circleville miss pumpkin right stephen is it miss pumpkin yeah I believe it's miss pumpkin and then there's little miss pumpkin right I'm gonna run for a little miss pumpkin there's two ways to be beautiful at the circleville pumpkin show get over there see what you how you rate Where a murderino, so you can identify other murderino people, you guys can all gather, eat.

[75] I hope there's fried pumpkin there because that's absolutely my favorite food in the world.

[76] Is fried pumpkin?

[77] Anything with pumpkin and I want to eat.

[78] And I don't mean pumpkin spice.

[79] Fuck pumpkin spice.

[80] Okay.

[81] I want the, when I get tempora and that fucking piece of pumpkin is in there fried.

[82] Oh, yeah, yeah.

[83] I'm going out of my mind.

[84] I see that it is very delicious.

[85] Mm -hmm.

[86] I agree.

[87] What, Stephen.

[88] Say it.

[89] Oh, there's a pet parade.

[90] Oh, my God.

[91] On Friday.

[92] next level holy shit pets will be there in their costumes there's no reason not to go to the circleville pumpkin show Elvis I'm dressing you up in solidarity and sending you out in a FedEx box sorry buddy you're gonna appear as a FedEx box at the Circleville pumpkin show this weekend burst like a cake burst out of a FedEx box like a stripper like the stripper he is we have more news to announce yeah more that's their project.

[93] We have our own projects.

[94] Do you want to go first?

[95] You want me to go first?

[96] Well, I guess that's pretty big news.

[97] A couple people have tweeted and asked us this when we announced the book.

[98] Right.

[99] We wrote a book called Stay Sexy and Don't Get Murdered.

[100] It's being written as a, or like.

[101] It was a dual memoirs, what they're calling it, which I think might be the first of its kind.

[102] That's right.

[103] And we're just here to announce now, we get to announce.

[104] We will be reading our own audio book.

[105] Of course we will be.

[106] I mean, who the fuck else is going to do it we were we suggested paul giamati but he's very busy on billions apparently um so a go to audible or anywhere that you listen to your audio books and you can pre -order it pre -order that shit and then get ready for us to read you a book you're going to get so sick of our voices it's going to be really embarrassing like reading some of that shit out loud i'm going to love every moment of it i'm going to cherish my own instrument and listen to my myself for the first time ever.

[107] We should have an alternative Paul Giamatti version, just in case people don't want to listen to us.

[108] If anyone is Paul Giamatti's agent or representative, cousin would be great.

[109] Like, you could get him at Thanksgiving.

[110] Linda Giamatti?

[111] Linda.

[112] What's her new last name?

[113] Bitterino.

[114] Linda, we would love it if you would hook us up and have Paul.

[115] I think he would actually nail it.

[116] Get him nice and drunk on vodka and lemon bomb tea.

[117] Okay.

[118] Apparently, that's a new thing.

[119] Did you just make that up?

[120] Yeah, I mean, it's just vodka with lemon bomb tea.

[121] Vodka and hot tea.

[122] Put some bitters in there.

[123] That's actually be nice for your throat.

[124] It might be kind of bitter as it is.

[125] That's true.

[126] And get Paul Giamati to sign the papers.

[127] We'll send them to you, Linda.

[128] God, this is, Linda, thanks so much for doing this job with us.

[129] We really appreciate all the work you do.

[130] That's right.

[131] You'll get a special thank you in the notes.

[132] Linda McKillacuddy, Giammati, you are our new manager.

[133] Meredith, you're fired.

[134] Sorry.

[135] Oh, I also, also, oh, hey, don't fast forward yet.

[136] This is really exciting.

[137] Today, which is Thursday, which is tomorrow for us, our new line of fucking merch is coming out.

[138] Fall merch.

[139] Fall merch that also includes the much fucking anticipated pet merch.

[140] Finally, we can talk about it.

[141] So a bunch of new shit's coming out Thursday today, My Favorite Murder .com and then go to the store.

[142] There's a bunch of new quotes.

[143] Like, you've seen some of them at the live shows.

[144] uh what in the fucking fuck a classic spell it like you say it great fucking hooray uh and then fucking hooray is in really cool kind of disco letter and i love yeah it's all really cool font that we specifically made people change 14 times until we were satisfied with it because that's how we are little closer little closer um and then very excited to announce our two new special uh they're called classic eco jersey jogger pants the fuck a sweatpants baby and one of them says fuck you i'm married and i could not be more excited to get these for myself hey are you a newlywed or an oldly wed is your friend about to get married and she needs something to wear on her wedding day getting dressed up in the photos or do you or do you have a sibling that's just some has been married for 30 years and is totally over it well it sounds like you need to get these sweatpants so there's two sweat there's sweatpants and then our fucking pet line which is so exciting we Karen had has a oh my god you guys have to see this so it's uh it's the dog Karen's dogs I'm coming out with a fierce a fiercely private t -shirt of frank and George that Chris Fairbanks drew who I do the other podcast do you need a ride with and he's an amazing graphic designer and illustrator so he drew a picture of George drinking water out of the glass like the video that I posted about about six months ago on Twitter, and then a picture of Frank, who's basically, I think he's smoking a cigar.

[145] It looks like a cigar.

[146] He's smoking a cigar.

[147] And it says in beautiful font for, it's like such a cool punk rock shirt.

[148] I love it.

[149] But then, hey, if you're not a dog person and you're a cat person, our friend Michael Ramstad, who created the really beautiful chalk outline like cartoony drawings of us that we use all the time in love.

[150] The earliest, I think, drawing of us.

[151] Yeah, that he did for us and we're like, can we buy that from you?

[152] We love it.

[153] He's so talented.

[154] He did an Elvis design.

[155] line for us.

[156] It's Elvis want a cookie and it's fucking cool shit.

[157] It's so cute.

[158] It's got Elvis on it.

[159] I love it.

[160] And then we also have those that are available for pets for like dogs, T -shirts.

[161] Your dog can wear a shirt of my dog.

[162] And then if your dog is an asshole or hates everyone, there's one that says here's the thing, fuck everyone that's a dog shirt.

[163] Yes.

[164] I don't need to tell you.

[165] There's more, there's even more.

[166] Really good stuff for the pet line.

[167] Yeah, go to my colors, bowls, you know it.

[168] My favorite murder .com, go to the store.

[169] It'll be up there.

[170] We're very excited to be bringing you, merch.

[171] And there's more to come, so.

[172] Merch that appeals to you.

[173] And we're very excited to be getting so much beautiful art and things that you guys create and make about this show, one of which a person named Callie Lawson, who is Callie Lawson Art on Instagram, drew a picture of Cody the Chainsaw Chicken, which was a story that we just did, like, this week on the minisad.

[174] Oh, yeah, it came out Monday.

[175] day.

[176] And I think she immediately drew this picture.

[177] And it is hauntingly beautiful.

[178] It's gorgeous.

[179] It's a child on a BMX bike with a chainsaw, a slung over his shoulder.

[180] Just how you described him that you wanted him to be.

[181] He's looking up at a fucking utility pole.

[182] In the most, you don't even see his face and the way he's looking at it with like reverence and awe.

[183] He's about to do some shit.

[184] And his like little ears are sticking out because he's a kid.

[185] Oh, it's beautiful.

[186] Thank you, Callie Lawson so much.

[187] It's a wonderful, it's a wonderful picture.

[188] Yeah.

[189] And thank you once again to Nick Terry, who has made yet another hilarious video of the Wheat Woo conversation we had about Georgia not being able to whistle.

[190] And what's his Instagram?

[191] He started a new Instagram of just the MFM animations so you can find them all in one place.

[192] That's cool.

[193] MFM underscore animated.

[194] Okay.

[195] Wow.

[196] on Instagram.

[197] That's so great.

[198] Thank you, Nick Terry.

[199] And he'll be at our Seattle show, so we should give him a shout out there.

[200] Oh, very cool.

[201] Okay, finally, we'll stop talking.

[202] Speaking about live shows.

[203] We're not going to fucking ever stop talking.

[204] Oh, I forgot that our whole podcast is.

[205] That's all this is.

[206] Halloween show.

[207] It's on Halloween.

[208] You've heard of it.

[209] It's at the Microsoft Theater.

[210] It's going to be literally fucking huge, 7 ,000 fucking people.

[211] What's up, Los Angeles?

[212] I'm terrified.

[213] Karen and I are dressing up as a surprise.

[214] costume and we want everyone's been asking should we dress up yes we highly recommend dressing up in costume every person I run into is like I'm going I immediately asked what you're going to dress up as it's going to be great so yes dress up Stephen I love that you did this I just wanted to just so people you know it's our costumes could be very colorful and I just didn't want anyone to get kicked out you know good just in case part of the essential part of their costume yeah so yeah hatchets probably don't any any weaponry of any kind do not bring it with you even though you're Michael Myers, and you're like, but it's my thing, don't bring a knife.

[215] Yeah.

[216] So, yeah.

[217] Yeah, it's, it's all that common sense stuff.

[218] And then I guess if you want to bring like a poster or a banner, a red flag, uh, it has to be smaller than 11 by 17 and not on a pole.

[219] That seemed like the most important thing, you know, but not on a poll.

[220] So like not on a stick or anything.

[221] Yeah, yeah.

[222] It's like you can, don't bring a stick to it.

[223] Or don't let it strip for a living.

[224] Oh, either way.

[225] I mean, if you can make a living stripping, go for it.

[226] Ain't no thing, baby.

[227] No. Oh, that's a Missy Elliott quote.

[228] Yeah, and that's pretty much it, shoes for safety.

[229] Please wear shoes.

[230] That's basically it.

[231] You can't go as the barefoot contessa.

[232] Oh, my God, is someone going to do it now?

[233] Maybe a zombie barefoot contest.

[234] I love it.

[235] Okay.

[236] Okay, this is an email that got sent, and this is off of our last, the last live show we posted, was from Durham, and I did the loss and family murders.

[237] And that was the story.

[238] Um, well, I'll just read this to you.

[239] Hi, hilarious people and your menageries.

[240] I loved seeing you in Charlotte.

[241] Um, I gave you the treasure chest with a mini, mini Elvis for Georgia and two dollar coins for Karen.

[242] I have that mini Elvis.

[243] It was at the bottom of the bag when I unpacked.

[244] You stall.

[245] No, it's just in the bag.

[246] God.

[247] I'll give it back.

[248] Damn it.

[249] So listening to your live Durham episode, though, I was horrified slash delighted to hear Karen tell the story of the loss and family murders.

[250] I'm an English teacher.

[251] And while I currently teach college English, my very first.

[252] teaching position was at North Stokes High School, a stone's throw from the old loss and family property.

[253] I knew nothing about it, but on Halloween that first year, when I let the kids tell scary stories instead of, you know, teaching them things.

[254] The kids collectively told me the entire loss and family murder story.

[255] I love that this class full of kids was like, yeah, and then my mom says that.

[256] Oh, I love it.

[257] Did she say high school?

[258] Because I'm imagining children in her.

[259] First high school, yes.

[260] Oh, great.

[261] Well, I'm like, Mrs. My mom told me. It's because she said the kids collectively.

[262] It's much cuter if it's first graders.

[263] Okay, so I didn't believe it at first, but I did notice that I had quite a few students with the last name of Lawson and come to find out that many of them were descendants of the Lawson family.

[264] They all knew the gory details because they'd all grown up hearing their parents talk about it.

[265] One student, get ready, has a great aunt who all caps still owns her stolen cake.

[266] raisin.

[267] No. Yep.

[268] Preserved in a small glass box.

[269] Holy shit.

[270] I tell the story.

[271] There was a cake that was on the table when these murders happened.

[272] It was a Christmas cake and it had raisins sprinkled on the top.

[273] Gross.

[274] Georgia was very upset about raisins on a cake.

[275] Yes.

[276] We talked about it forever.

[277] Someone ended up buying that cake and keeping it for a while.

[278] Apparently, this person's great aunt stole the cake a raisin off the cake when she did her walk through and then kept it in glass in a glass box box.

[279] okay so back to the letter this that was all me talking okay naturally I demanded to see it and she brought it in for show until a week later the kids offered to take me to the pain road location but I declined because you know teenagers are teenagers are already scary enough another weird connection the pain family that the road is named um uh red pain was my great uncle wow the of of which she's saying the Payne family that the road is named after.

[280] Got it.

[281] Red Payne is her great uncle.

[282] That's a terrifying name.

[283] Best Susan.

[284] Then she tells a whole big long ghost story that I can't get into now, but we will save it for a different minisode.

[285] Please do.

[286] Yeah.

[287] I got a ton of letters of people from that same show who were like, yeah, those are my family members too, the bitter blood murders, which I'll read it at a hometown at some point.

[288] I think that happens when it's like the small town infancy.

[289] Yeah.

[290] That's what's so scary about picking.

[291] murderous for live shows is that you don't want something like the Dublin show and someone goes that's my what did they say that's my cousin you're like oh no are you mad at me they were so into they were great um cool all right anything else i think that's well oh this was just an email from the um the this is actually awesome this is the Minneapolis murderino group and it says dear mfm fam inspired by the yoga rinos i hosted a social movement um a couple of social movement classes yesterday at six degrees in Minneapolis, which I guess is a yoga studio.

[292] Oh.

[293] We raised $500 to for end the backlog.

[294] We also showed that even when the world seems inexorably fucked, we can still do things to support ourselves and others.

[295] My fellow teachers wanted to in on the do -gooding, so now I'm organizing a full series every second Sunday of every month.

[296] One of our teachers will host a free class with donations going to a nonprofit they care about.

[297] The next two are already scheduled with November donations going to benefit Tubman, a local group helping over 25 ,000 victims of trauma each year from fleeing war -torn areas to experiencing sex trafficking and intimate partner violence.

[298] And in December, Camp Bovi, a summer camp for city kids who live in poverty and otherwise wouldn't get to experience, the super fun of getting eaten alive by mosquitoes, trying to watch the campfire smell from your hair, and writing pitiful letters home, begging for parents to come pick them up.

[299] You know, fun summer camp shit.

[300] SSDGM, Leda.

[301] Oh, my God.

[302] That's beautiful.

[303] So the yoga, that's the coolest thing that people are really kind of building this in.

[304] That is just our, in our passing, I want to get into yoga thing.

[305] Now suddenly people are like, we're going to be doing some shit.

[306] It's a great way to like do something for yourself, even if you, if you don't feel, you know, people sometimes don't do things because they don't feel worth self -care.

[307] Sure.

[308] It's like, well, I'm doing something for someone else.

[309] So it's a great way.

[310] It's not about you.

[311] selfish?

[312] It's a good Kickstarter.

[313] So good job Minneapolis, murdering us.

[314] Thank you for taking that.

[315] And I would just like to say, yes, the yoga has fallen away, but the swimming has taken over.

[316] Amazing.

[317] And I just ordered, based on someone's recommendation on Twitter, I just ordered a waterproof iPod that I can listen to while I swim my laps.

[318] That's a thing?

[319] Uh -huh.

[320] You're chain.

[321] I'll swim now, too.

[322] No, I won't.

[323] But I might.

[324] You could try.

[325] I could try.

[326] It's really, here's what I'll say.

[327] Not drinking coffee and swimming is like the most relaxed and low -key I've been in three fucking years.

[328] Thank you.

[329] I'll drink my canned wine to that.

[330] I also just, just on a personal note, slammed my elbow into the wall right before I left my house to come over here.

[331] And it, I, it feels broken and like, it feels like my entire arm is broken.

[332] Oh, shit.

[333] You know, when you, like, hit...

[334] It's red.

[335] I was walking full speed into the kitchen and just was putting my purse over my shoulder at the same time.

[336] And clonked into it.

[337] Just right on the edge.

[338] It looks broken.

[339] It's broken.

[340] It looks like it's falling off.

[341] Oh, gangrene.

[342] I say gangrene.

[343] Now I'm doing the scarecrow from Wizard of Oz.

[344] Yeah, it's pretty fucking...

[345] All right, that's just a personal update.

[346] No, I love it.

[347] I appreciate it.

[348] It feels like we haven't recorded one of these in so long.

[349] I know.

[350] want to get it all out.

[351] That's right.

[352] That's exactly right.

[353] That's exactly right.

[354] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.

[355] Absolutely.

[356] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash.

[357] Exactly.

[358] And if you're a small business owner, you might know Shopify is great for online sales.

[359] But did you know that they also power in -person sales?

[360] That's right.

[361] Shopify is the sound of selling everywhere.

[362] Online, in -store, on social media, and beyond.

[363] Give your point -of -sale system a serious upgrade with Shopify.

[364] From accepting payments to managing inventory, they have everything you need to sell in person.

[365] So give your point -of -sale system a serious upgrade with Shopify.

[366] Their sleek, reliable POS hardware takes every major payment method and looks fabulous at the same time.

[367] With Shopify, we have a powerful partner for managing our sales, and if you're a business owner, you can't too.

[368] Connect with customers in line and online.

[369] Do retail right with Shopify.

[370] Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify .com slash murder.

[371] Important note, that promo code is all lowercase.

[372] Go to Shopify .com slash murder to take your retail business to the next level today.

[373] That's Shopify .com slash murder.

[374] Goodbye.

[375] Hey, this is exciting.

[376] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[377] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster detectives.

[378] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone, who killed Saz?

[379] And were they really after Charles?

[380] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[381] This season, murder hits close to home.

[382] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[383] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[384] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[385] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[386] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfenakis, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[387] Only Martyrs in the Building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[388] Goodbye.

[389] I'm first, Stephen said, right?

[390] Okay.

[391] That's right.

[392] You ready?

[393] I think so.

[394] Should we do this?

[395] Let's do it.

[396] All right.

[397] Hey, it's mid -October.

[398] Oh, my sister's birthdays today.

[399] Happy birthday, Lee.

[400] Happy birthday, Lee.

[401] It's mid -October.

[402] Everyone's favorite time of year.

[403] Halloween.

[404] Everyone loves it.

[405] Yes or no. Absolutely.

[406] Are you about to tell me the plot of the movie?

[407] movie of Halloween.

[408] I am going to read you, the original screenplay of the movie, Halloween.

[409] Love nothing more.

[410] There's so much silence.

[411] I was just like, I didn't really prepare this week.

[412] So, no. No, but I am going to go in a weird direction.

[413] And I'm going to describe and explain some instances and the urban legend and the truthiness to it of poison Halloween candy yes this is great yay I'm glad you're here with me listen I would like to go ahead and thank almost exclusively snopes dot com nice one of my favorite time wasters back when I had a desk job yeah and our old friend Wikipedia best info right there that as a married couple is all you need on the internet I mean you're the smartest person in the fucking room yes at your desk you could actually use snow on Wikipedia.

[414] Oh my God.

[415] Not a bad idea.

[416] No. I just thought of that for myself for the future.

[417] Snopesopedia.

[418] What if that's a new thing?

[419] Who was somebody invent this, this new third thing and then give us a cut?

[420] Yeah.

[421] And then we'll just read from that.

[422] No, I'm not.

[423] I'm not.

[424] Okay, I'm not.

[425] Okay.

[426] So let's start with, let's start with it.

[427] All right.

[428] So the stories of crazy people passing out poison candy or candy that has razor blades or needles in it has been around for fucking decades as an urban legend.

[429] And it makes sense because every 364 days of the year, we tell kids don't take candy from strangers.

[430] And then one day we're like, go get free candy from strangers.

[431] It's a can, the candy purge is really where every, all the rules are gone.

[432] That's right.

[433] You could do what you want and you can stab people.

[434] It's very confusing for children.

[435] It's so great.

[436] And you can stab people.

[437] What isn't fucking confusing for children?

[438] I mean, kids are pretty stupid.

[439] It's, and everyone lies to them constant.

[440] That's right.

[441] Constant lying.

[442] That's exactly right.

[443] So, actually, I didn't know this.

[444] And Snob's told me, Anne Landers, you know, go ask Anne Landers.

[445] What was it called?

[446] Dear Abby.

[447] Thank you.

[448] They each, you know, it's two sisters when they each have columns.

[449] So one was Dear Abby and one was.

[450] Anne Landers, I think.

[451] Okay.

[452] I think they're two different because one's, dear Abby is Abigail Vampier.

[453] Okay.

[454] Then Anne is, go ask Ann Landers.

[455] You know.

[456] Or a column.

[457] She published a column in 1995 that said, quote, in recent years, there have been reports of people with twisted minds putting razor blades and poison in taffy apples and Halloween candy which is like well you're spreading that go ask Ann and also sorry Ann but taffy apples are from 1920 so this is all bullshit okay and according to Snopes since 1959 there have been around 80 reports of sharp objects uh in in food and some hospitals and police departments they started to offer to x -ray the the candy in children that they got before eating, which sounds like a blast for kids.

[458] And actually, I first heard about that when Vince told me about it.

[459] Oh, really?

[460] That when he was a kid in Michigan outside of Detroit, they'd get dressed up and go trick -or -treating and then not get home and go through any dollar candy, then go to the police station and have it fucking X -rayed.

[461] And I asked him for more details and he's like, no, it just happened like every year.

[462] So that was standard in his town?

[463] I think it was standard in his town.

[464] He was like, it was also true that my, like, his family all worked in the police department.

[465] So I think that they like, insisted upon it.

[466] Yeah.

[467] But yeah, it was standard.

[468] That's what kids did.

[469] That's amazing.

[470] I, yeah, I, I always thought all of that was bullshit.

[471] I thought that was just as much of a story as the razor blades themselves.

[472] That part's true.

[473] I don't know if it's still happening, but I imagine there's got to be some towns.

[474] All I remember is my mom, now I know being high and stealing my fucking candy when I got home.

[475] Good shit.

[476] Yeah, that's right.

[477] Sorry, Mom.

[478] She grabbed those snickers.

[479] She's like, oh, you can have the sweet tart.

[480] She knows.

[481] Yeah, thanks, Mom.

[482] I don't want the fucking whoppers or whatever.

[483] But the majority of those reports turned out to be hoaxes.

[484] And even when the stories were true, it was usually a family member fucking with someone else in their family or a little kid being like, look, there's poison on it.

[485] But he had like dipped it in poison and not eating it and shown them.

[486] And then just being a little shithead.

[487] Go to your room.

[488] Forever.

[489] Forever, you little shit.

[490] Okay.

[491] So I'm going to tell you some stories of when it was true -ish, you know, kind of.

[492] Okay.

[493] And maybe that helped help the rumors abound.

[494] Sure.

[495] Well, because you only really need one of those stories for people to freak out because it's like, it's somebody once a year is going to try to kill your child with a hidden thing.

[496] And a lot of these are like, something happened and it blew up in the media.

[497] And then when they found out what really happened, that didn't get covered as much.

[498] So in people's minds, it's true.

[499] So let's start in 1964.

[500] You mean the normal media cycle.

[501] So in 1964, Helen Fleel, I don't know how to, P -F -E -I -I.

[502] spell it like you say it yeah that looks i think flea flea feel feel in greenlaw new york she was a housewife and she got caught handing out packages of indedible inedible treats uh in what she described as a joke she had become annoyed that a bunch of tricker -treaters were showing up that were like teenagers and too old to be trick -or -treating yeah and so she was pissed off at them and so she was like i'm going to make up these little packages to give out to the fucking the little bratty 16 -year -olds Okay.

[503] In the packages were dog biscuits, steel wool pads, and arsenic -laced ant poison buttons.

[504] Oh, no. So she's like, I don't know, somehow do that.

[505] She was crazy.

[506] She was crazy and kind of a bitch.

[507] Okay.

[508] Right?

[509] Yeah, you can't give people arsenic of any kind.

[510] Even if it's a joke.

[511] Even as a hilarious joke.

[512] Oh, jokey prank.

[513] But they were clearly marked poison and labeled with skull and crossbones.

[514] So like, yeah, but you could have just written that somewhere and better get it.

[515] I'm trying to poison you and not actually do it.

[516] Like, what if one of the kids have eaten it, you know, teenagers?

[517] They're really stupid.

[518] Carol would have been like, oh, well, ha, ha, ha, ha.

[519] Yeah.

[520] I'm so funny.

[521] So she, uh, told the teenagers that the package were a joke when she handed it out.

[522] It sounds like she was just trying to be the cool aunt.

[523] Oh, okay.

[524] And then, um, she was a little high.

[525] Yeah.

[526] Right.

[527] No one, uh, was harmed at all.

[528] But even so, the potential to harm was there.

[529] so she was charged by the police.

[530] She pled guilty to endangering children and eventually received a suspended sentence.

[531] Wow.

[532] Oh, no. She really regretted that hilarious joke.

[533] Jokes on you, Helen.

[534] Helen, I get it.

[535] When you're always trying to be funny, it really fucks your life up.

[536] I get you.

[537] In 1970, two days after Halloween, a five -year -old kid named Kevin lapsed into a coma and died four days after four days later and it came out that he his family said that he had eaten some Halloween candy that that was shown when they tested it had been sprinkled with heroin oh my God right it's so awful it was reported as a real life example of what happens on Halloween but was what less likely was reported was that when police investigated further they found that the boy had gotten into his uncle's heroin stash consumed it, and in a attempt to cover for the uncle had sprinkled the candy themselves with heroin.

[538] Oh, no. I know.

[539] That's just, that's just tragic all around.

[540] It's horrible, but it's, you know, in people's minds, that's, it was a connection there.

[541] Right.

[542] It's awful.

[543] In 1990, a seven -year -old Santa Monica girl named Ariel died on October 31st on Halloween while trick -or -treating, like while she was trick -treating, the police were a fear of mass random poisoning, so they immediately conducted an intense door -ditor search on the street where she had collapsed.

[544] They thought other kids might have gotten poison Halloween candy, so they blocked off the street.

[545] They took all the kids' candy and questioned everyone for several hours and interviewed residents and Halloween trick -or -treaters.

[546] Yeah, the only kind.

[547] The only kind of trick -or -treaters.

[548] But in the end, it turned out that Ariel had actually died of congenital heart failure.

[549] It was just a fucking huge coincidence.

[550] So it's, well, here's a thing, though.

[551] That's insanely tragic.

[552] So I don't mind that it's like, guess what Halloween's canceled?

[553] Yeah.

[554] Because it's like, this is the worst thing that could happen.

[555] And you shouldn't just pretend like it didn't happen.

[556] It's awful.

[557] It's just awful.

[558] 91, another suspected Halloween poisoning occurred in Washington, D .C., a 31 -year -old named Kevin Michael Cherry of Montgomery County died shortly after eating some of his kids' Halloween candy.

[559] Parents lost their shit, dumped all their kids' candy, but later it was determined that, by an autopsy, that he had died of congenital heart failure as well.

[560] Oh, wow.

[561] Yeah.

[562] But natural causes, natural causes, yeah.

[563] So then in 1996, seven -year -old, a seven -year -old named Ferdinand, of San Jose, California, collapsed on Halloween after eating candy and cookies he was given while trick -or -treating.

[564] Initial urinalysis, urine analysis?

[565] Is that urinalysis?

[566] I don't know.

[567] At the hospital showed traces of cocaine in a system.

[568] Oh, no. So everyone loses their shit, throw away all their candy, but then tests come back and it was negative to cocaine and the first results were wrong.

[569] So the media had already picked on a lot, but later they found out that he had died of natural causes as well.

[570] Oh, God.

[571] I know.

[572] Oh, it's just the worst.

[573] Well, and it makes sense that, like, the media also has this big story.

[574] It's, like, sells papers.

[575] And then it's, the truth of it is just tragic.

[576] It's just tragic and heartbreaking.

[577] So they put it in a little column as a follow -up.

[578] Yeah, that no one even pays attention to it.

[579] Also, everyone's already got, it doesn't make sense to just beg for free candy for strangers.

[580] It's a weird tradition that we do.

[581] So people are, I feel like at any bad news, people are just like, well, let's just throw it all away.

[582] Do you give out, do you like stock your, no one comes down our street because there's, it's a more popular like four blocks over.

[583] Oh, yeah.

[584] And so everyone on our street goes totally dark.

[585] People pretend, everyone pretends they're not home.

[586] Love it.

[587] And I've had one trick or treater.

[588] It was the cutest.

[589] It was a little, like a four -year -old girl.

[590] And I think her a slightly older brother.

[591] and I just gave each of them half the bowl of candy.

[592] I love it.

[593] I was just like, you guys are the only ones.

[594] And they were like, this is our favorite house.

[595] I want to live in a place one day that does trick -or -treating.

[596] Yeah.

[597] Like, I just have never lived in a place that does that.

[598] It's very, you know what's the cutest?

[599] Well, in my hometown, Petaluma.

[600] Yeah.

[601] It's really big on D Street, which is the street with all the big old Victorian houses.

[602] And people go crazy.

[603] They make their houses haunted houses.

[604] They make, like, it's just total tradition.

[605] and it's really fun.

[606] Someday I need to go hang out with my nephews on that day instead of just not.

[607] See what they're into.

[608] Right.

[609] Instead of going to all year parties.

[610] My fun things and my live show.

[611] Actually, I'm not coming to a live show.

[612] I'm going to go trick -or -treating with my nephews.

[613] Okay.

[614] I'll bring Nora down to co -host with me. Great.

[615] Sounds great.

[616] She's like, actually, I'd rather trick -or -treat.

[617] Yeah, Nora's like, I have plans over on D Street.

[618] Thanks anyway.

[619] In the year 2000, a dude named James Joseph Smith of Minneapolis stuck needles in the Snickers bars that he handed out.

[620] This is the one we've all heard of to trick or treaters.

[621] What year was it, sorry?

[622] This is 2000.

[623] I'm sure it's happened before that.

[624] There were several children who bit into the candy bars, but there was only one teenager who was pricked by one of the needles and it wasn't like bad.

[625] But if I'm pricked by a needle, I'm like, I'm dying.

[626] Take me to the hospital.

[627] Yes.

[628] And also like a needle in your mouth, anywhere in your mouth is very upsetting.

[629] terrible.

[630] But police charged Smith with one count of adulterating a substance with intent to cause harm or illness.

[631] I mean, that's really throw the book at him.

[632] Yeah.

[633] How about charging him with just being a fucking creep?

[634] A creepy dude and a dick.

[635] And an asshole.

[636] And keep your children away from him.

[637] 30 to 60 years.

[638] Boom.

[639] For those charges.

[640] Did you know that?

[641] Sounds harsh, but have you ever met the creepy dick?

[642] Yeah, you'd want them to go away for 30 years too Promise you Minimum And then in the town of Hercules, California That's near youish Not really Okay, great In 2000, again, some trick -or -treaters So these trick -or -treaters come home And they're like, Mommy, Daddy, Why are these little snickers, the individual miniature snicker bars Like done up like little packets And there's some weird oregano in them So they find these little packets of pot tied up in these fucking Snickers bars, like packages.

[643] Oh, like when they open the Snickers, it's pot?

[644] Yeah.

[645] So that really did happen.

[646] And the police are like, wait, what the fuck.

[647] The homeowners apparently weren't my mom because they were like bummed about it.

[648] Because they called somebody about it.

[649] What if that was the whole time?

[650] My mom was like, I'll take this one, this one, and this one.

[651] It was just her dealer.

[652] Like, looking goes on.

[653] You had just been drug running for your mom?

[654] in the 70s once a year yeah mom I don't think it's October 31st just go out with your pillowcase go trick or tree down the street um so so they they find the house where they had gotten the little baggies of pot and the homeowner was like wait what the fuck like the homeowner legit didn't know what was going on and the police believed him he's telling the truth turns out this dude worked in the dead letter office at the local post office and And he had found a bag of miniature snickers in the dead post stuff.

[655] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[656] And he had found that with a long sum, like, canned food and the post office was like, here, take this to the local charity.

[657] But he was like, well, I'm just going to take these snickers and pass them out at Halloween.

[658] Oh, dude.

[659] But it turned out that the candy was probably just someone's attempt at smuggling pot through the mail.

[660] And what a great attempt it was.

[661] Great, yeah.

[662] This guy should go to prison for being a stupid idiot and stealing from.

[663] the charity, too.

[664] I don't know.

[665] He kind of love him.

[666] Bumbling old.

[667] His name's Herb.

[668] Bumbling old herb.

[669] He's just kind of like, he didn't, he knew he had to have candy for the Tracheter's, but he didn't want to spend that five bucks.

[670] And he's also not, he's giving it away.

[671] It's not like he's making money off of it.

[672] And he clearly didn't open, like he's actually a miracle case, in my opinion.

[673] He didn't open and try to eat any of them himself to then know.

[674] He could have made a lot of money off of that and given that to charity.

[675] Dude, that's what you get.

[676] give the teenagers and show to them first make him give you some money Karen's got it planned I got it okay finally we've gotten to the real fucking deal okay here we go yes wait can I just just say this because this is just reminding me and I can't remember if I've told you but one time we were trick or treating on D Street before it was like as commercial as it is now that was just the real 80s deal sure we were with our friends and their babies sitter so we were like eight or whatever and then this was like a 15 year old girl that was eating all your candy no no no she was super chilled she would just like let us walk up and she would stand at the end of like the walkway yeah and wait for us and we walked up to this one house and it was the oldest lady and she had a little like I still remember all of it a moss green bowl and it had like eight little just cookies like powdered sugar cookies and I couldn't tell if they were packaged or she'd made them but she was like here you go and we all were like thank you of course we didn't want them but we were like thanks so much and we walked back kind of holding them like uncomfortably and we get to the end of the thing and the 15 -year -old sees them all in our hand and she just slaps each cookie out of each of our hip she was like put that down throw that away like that oh my god because they were like homemade yes and because they were covered in white powder oh my god she fucking like was like wipe your hands off do this and like had this thing we're like her lives and what if she did but we were like that old lady it made me laugh for so long because i was like if you had seen this old lady she would be the last person you would think that would ever murder you with her lemon drop cookies but this girl was just like throw it away like went into full babysitter mode it was the best i'm just picturing the grandma come out on the next morning and see her cookies like laying waste on the sidewalk in front of her and her heartbreaking yeah and that's how she did so sad all right let's get to the real deal okay October 31st aka Halloween 1974 here we are Ronald Mark O 'Brien this fucking dude takes his two kids Timothy and Elizabeth trick or treating in Pasadena Texas with their neighbor dude and the neighbors two children coming along with them what's up we're all going trick or treating fun great they stop at one of the places they stop nobody answers the door and so everyone runs ahead except for fucking good old Ronald Mark O 'Brien who's like I'm going to catch up with you guys when he does catch up with them he's like oh they someone answered the door finally and he gave me these pixie sticks uh oh so he gives uh he produces five 21 inch pixie sticks and uh he gives uh two of the pixie he gives one pixie stick to each of his kids and one each to the uh neighbor's kids and then they get home and they see uh a 10 -year -old kid that they knew from church, and Brian's like, oh, here's the last pixie stick to this guy.

[677] So he passes out five pixie sticks that he apparently got from this ghost neighbor.

[678] Okay.

[679] Before bed that night, his son, 8 -year -old Timothy, asks to eat some of the candy he collected.

[680] He chooses a pixie stick, which is I call bullshit because no fucking kid wants a pixie stick.

[681] No. He has trouble getting the candy open and the powder out, so his dad helps him with it.

[682] he says it tastes bitter so he gives him Kool -Aid to wash away the taste and Timothy immediately complains that his stomach hurt and he goes to the bathroom he begins vomiting and convulsing and then he goes limp I know and little Timothy O 'Brien dies on the way to the hospital less than an hour after consuming the candy shit of course the community goes fucking ape shit parents in the area bring their kids candy to the police thinking it was laced with poison and initially police didn't suspect this dude Ronald with any wrongdoing until Timothy's autopsy reveals that the pixie stick he consumes was laced with a fatal dose of potassium cyanide.

[683] Oh my God.

[684] They go to find the other pixie sticks, the like four other ones and fucking thank God none of the kids had eaten them.

[685] Oh good.

[686] But when they go to the big kids' house, they couldn't find the pixie stick in his bag of candy.

[687] The parents are freaking out.

[688] Where's a pixie stick?

[689] They go upstairs to the kid's room he's sleeping on his bed and he's holding the pixie stick he had tried to open it but it had been shut in such a way that he couldn't open it couldn't get it open so we just fucking fell asleep probably from sugar he was he was 10 oh oh my god that's a miracle yeah he was it was sitting with him that mother cried so hard then she slapped everyone around her can you just be like damn it don't ever scare me like that again.

[690] Don't you ever Pixie?

[691] She's slapping the Pixie stick back and forth across its face.

[692] Oh my God.

[693] She rubs a little of it on her teeth just to make sure.

[694] Let's see.

[695] Da -da -da -da -da -da -da.

[696] Okay.

[697] So all five of the Pixie sticks turns out they had all been tampered with they had been opened and the top two inches had been refilled with cyanide powder and then resealed with a staple, which is why this kid couldn't open the fucking thing.

[698] And like, according to a pathologist who tested the pixie sticks, the candy consumed by Timothy contained enough cyanide to kill two adults while the other four cyanide, the other poor candies contained dosages that would kill three to four adults.

[699] Jesus Christ.

[700] Yeah.

[701] Even stronger.

[702] Police investigated Ronald and learned that he was over $100 ,000 in debt, and he had a history, and this is 1974 money, which we know is a million dollars in today's really.

[703] It's easily a million dollars.

[704] And he had a history of being unable to hold down a job.

[705] he was going to get fired soon.

[706] His car was about to be repossessed.

[707] He had defaulted on several bank loans.

[708] And the family home was about to be foreclosed on.

[709] And, of course, he had also taken out life insurance policies for a large sum of money on his children.

[710] Despite his insurers being like, why do you want to take out another $20 ,000 on your kids?

[711] It was like up to $60 ,000 that he had taken out on, I think, each of his kids.

[712] So he's just an awful psychopath.

[713] He's a fucking piece of shit.

[714] shit at his trial he can he maintained his innocence throughout this whole thing including at his trial obviously um his defense was mainly that hey man look at all these decades of urban legends about mad poisoners on Halloween it must have been some fucking crazy poisoner and look how much like legend or like how much history there is of that so you can't blame me it's a known thing that everyone does just like all this stuff I just read to you uh and And it didn't fucking work.

[715] Because it's not really true.

[716] It's not true.

[717] The case was circumstantial completely, but still, Ronald O 'Brien was convicted of the murder of his son Timothy in May in 1975.

[718] He received a death sentence and was executed by lethal injection on March 31st.

[719] It should have been fucking Halloween, 1984.

[720] Shit.

[721] And that is some stories of fucking candy being laced.

[722] Wow.

[723] Halloween.

[724] So the one real one is like the worst creepiest.

[725] The one real one is like true as fuck, which is why it can keep being told.

[726] Because it's like, it's true, but it's not what you think it is.

[727] It's true, but then it's just, it's the lie of like, but this is what people do.

[728] Which is like.

[729] No, they don't.

[730] They kill their kids and their family for fucking life insurance money.

[731] That's what they do.

[732] That's the truth of it.

[733] Yeah, the husband did it.

[734] That's the real trick.

[735] And it's not a treat.

[736] trick of life is that life is no treat so this was one of the stories and i think i told you when we were in medford massachusetts it's from there but it is one of these stories and i remember the first time i saw this on um you know which nightline or whichever uh true crime kind of magazine show and it was one of the most shocking true crime stories i'd ever seen on tv and really a bummer and I figured for our live show it would be such a bummer yeah everyone's like why didn't you do this one all the time and it's like because you can't tell an audience full of people the most huge bummer you've ever heard you well you can but then it's just real quiet yeah and it's a real bummer and we don't get to have any fun and so when we that's why we like to do like more historical or the weirder ones um because then there's there's you can have a little more fun this is this is one of the worst uh most fucked up crimes.

[737] Oh my God.

[738] Oh, my God.

[739] And it's the murder of Carol Stewart.

[740] So all of the information that I got in these stories, I got from two articles.

[741] One was written for Boston magazine by a guy named David J. Krechek, I believe, is the way you pronounce his last name.

[742] And the other is, was written by Roberto Scalise for Boston .com.

[743] And they were, both of them are just full of information.

[744] And I'm, you know, there's lots of poll quotes and big chunks of just their writing.

[745] They put it together really nicely and concisely.

[746] So it's the night of October 23rd, 1989, and a 29 -year -old Chuck Stewart, and his 30 -year -old wife Carol are driving home in their Toyota Cressida from a birthing class at Brigham and Women's Hospital.

[747] Carol's seven months pregnant with their first child.

[748] at 8 .43 p .m., the state police dispatcher Gary McLaughlin gets a phone call from Chuck Stewart's car phone, and he says, my wife's been shot, I've been shot.

[749] So the dispatcher asks if Carol's breathing, Chuck says, I just hear gurgling.

[750] And then basically, for the next 13 minutes, this dispatcher tries to get Chuck to say where he is in the city.

[751] And Chuck is saying, I can see a busy street ahead of me. I can't.

[752] I'm in so much pain.

[753] I'm, and the guy's going, look at a street sign.

[754] Yeah.

[755] We're trying to find you.

[756] And the guy's just screaming and going crazy.

[757] Did you listen to it?

[758] No, but they had it in, uh, I have a picture of one of the, um, newspaper headlines, like an article that was a front page article.

[759] And they have the, um, what do you call that?

[760] Transcript.

[761] The transcript of it.

[762] as the beginning of the article and it's just the guy going Chuck look up for me tell me what street you're on like anything and it takes 13 minutes holy shit and the guy assumes this guy is in shock so he sounds lucid he's speaking in a lucid way but he's he's in shock and he's been shot in the gut basically so when police finally do find them the car is at the corner of St. Alfonza Street and Horrid in Way horrid in way and so they're just blocks from that hospital where they were taking their birthday class now this is so fucked up so the paramedics get there and they have a camera crew from the show Rescue 911 riding along with them no yes so they all get out of the ambulance and start working on these guys in the car and basically there's footage of of it Christ.

[763] Yeah.

[764] And God, I watched the shit out of that show as a kid.

[765] Yeah.

[766] I don't know if it actually, I don't know if it made it onto the real show.

[767] Probably not, right.

[768] But the pictures, like, there's pictures from that.

[769] So there is footage.

[770] I don't know where it ended up living that shows Carol pregnant with a gaping head wound being cut from her seatbelt and laid onto a stretcher as the EMT is compressing her chest and trying to get a heart.

[771] beat going.

[772] Oh, my God.

[773] So, um, they rush her back to bring him in women's hospital.

[774] The doctors, um, they have, they take the baby out.

[775] It's, so it's only, it's under four pounds.

[776] Um, and they put the baby on life support.

[777] Oh my God.

[778] Um, Chuck is taken to Boston City Hospital.

[779] This isn't this area of Boston where there's, truly like hospitals everywhere.

[780] And it's everyone's going to school and shit and learning and things.

[781] It's all kinds of colleges and all.

[782] kinds of hospitals.

[783] So Chuck goes to Boston City and he then undergo six hours of surgery on his bowel, gallbladder, and liver.

[784] And he has substantial damage and is in critical condition, but he survives.

[785] Unfortunately, Carol does not.

[786] She's pronounced dead at 3 a .m. on October 24th, 1989.

[787] So four days later on October 28th, Carol is buried in Medford, Massachusetts, which was the town area we were in.

[788] Because that's where she was from.

[789] Oh, honey.

[790] More than 800 people, including Boston mayor Ray Flynn, Governor Michael Dukakis, and Cardinal Bernard Law attend her funeral.

[791] And Chuck is still in the hospital, but he manages to write a eulogy for his wife's funeral, and it is read by a family friend, and this is what they read.

[792] Good night.

[793] Sweet wife, my love, God has called you to his hands, not to take you away from me or the happiness and gladness you brought to me, but to bring you away from the cruelty and the violence that fills this world.

[794] He said that for us to truly believe, we must know that his will was done and that there is some right in the meanest of acts.

[795] In our souls, we must forgive this sinner because he would too.

[796] He, capital A .G. My life will be more empty without you, as will the lives of your family and friends.

[797] You have brought joy and kindness to every life you've touched.

[798] And now you sleep away from me. I will never again know the feeling of your hand in mind, but I will always feel you.

[799] I miss you and I love you.

[800] Your husband, Chuck.

[801] I want to cry and get really sad and emotional, but I'm scared he did it.

[802] So I feel not ready to cry about that.

[803] Yeah, I would stay in a neutral place for now.

[804] That's what I, but I don't want to ruin it for you.

[805] Um, no, that's okay.

[806] I feel like just the pattern of these things is ruined it for us.

[807] It's ruined.

[808] I'm like, do I feel for him and cry or do okay here's can I point out why I think your instincts are telling you hey dry those eyes okay because the line in our souls we must forgive this sinner because he would to just just something I italicist I'd like to go ahead and allow Vince to have hate in his soul for whoever kills me one day for the rest of his life right and that's fine yeah because when we're so quick to forgive the sinner like this is still the The funeral?

[809] Let's get past this, everyone.

[810] Yeah.

[811] Let's give it a year.

[812] Okay.

[813] So two of Chuck's brothers act as Paul Bearers carrying Carol's casket during the services.

[814] And then on November 9th, at 17 days old, their baby dies of respiratory failure.

[815] So it's two deaths.

[816] So when the police talk to Charles Stewart, he tells them, get ready.

[817] Here I am.

[818] Boston, 1988.

[819] You got a car phone, bro.

[820] A black man with a. raspy voice invaded their car that night.

[821] He said the man took cash, the car keys, jewelry, and Carol's Gucci bag.

[822] But before he left, he started saying he thought that Chuck was 5 -0.

[823] He thought he was a plane close cop.

[824] And then he shot both of them.

[825] Jesus.

[826] And Chuck said that on the first shot he ducked, and that's why the first bullet hit him in the abdomen.

[827] And the second shot hit Carol in the head, killing her and ultimately the unborn baby.

[828] So when all of this hits the newspapers the next day the city goes into a complete furor.

[829] The Boston Herald runs a headline that says, quote, a terrible night with this huge picture where and it's a really disturbing picture.

[830] Carol is slumped toward the driver's seat.

[831] Her hair's in her face.

[832] Her mouth is open.

[833] There is blood on her shirt.

[834] While Charles, who's in the driver's seat his shirt has blood, it's ripped open.

[835] He's grimacing and it looks like he's fighting to get out of the car it's a really graphic because it's fucking front page story it's headline news and because this was the height of the crack epidemic in america right so all black neighborhoods pretty much in like you know or major urban areas were just overrun with violence and crime because of the crack epidemic um and then on top of that this rescue 9 -1 -1 footage and pictures like this really made it real it was just like you know this random shooting this random crime and here it is a pregnant woman a pregnant woman a couple leaving their birthing claw or whatever it's like the ultimate in innocence right right and the ultimate in whiteness these two people and here's why it's okay for your racism to exist well 100 % it just underlines the story so in david care check's article he says quote but With a black perpetrator and white victims, it fit comfortably into this nation's deep -rooted prejudices about race and crime.

[836] In Boston, white paranoia was running high as the crack epidemic intensified violent crime in black neighborhoods like Roxbury, but it wasn't long before an ugly racist murmur underscored white Boston's empathy for the stewards.

[837] Mayor Ray Flynn seemed to sanction that attitude when he pledged to, quote, get the animals responsible.

[838] Ooh.

[839] Yeah.

[840] In the fucking press.

[841] Within days, there are calls by lawmakers to reinstate the death penalty.

[842] Jesus.

[843] Frank Bellotti, a former Massachusetts Attorney General, who was running for governor, told the press, quote, I'd pull the switch myself.

[844] Wow.

[845] And along with those incendiary statements, the press was comparing the stewards to the Kennedys with the Boston Herald running an article about their lives with the headline, quote, Dreams of Camelot.

[846] Oh, my God.

[847] Yeah.

[848] So she was really beautiful.

[849] And he, they were really successful.

[850] They lived in a really nice part of town.

[851] And this was that kind of thing where they symbolized like the up and coming white couple.

[852] Right.

[853] Um, so basically Charles Stewart Jr. and Carol, um, Di Miotti Stewart met in 1980.

[854] They were both working at a restaurant in Ravia, which is Chuck's hometown.

[855] Rivia.

[856] I would not have, I don't know how that spell, but I would have not probably said that.

[857] I'm giving it the accent.

[858] I'm giving it the revere accent because it's revere.

[859] But they say Revia.

[860] Oh.

[861] You know, like, did you see the movie?

[862] I love it.

[863] Is it the boxer, the fighter?

[864] Yeah, yeah.

[865] Christian Bale.

[866] So good.

[867] I think that took place in Revea.

[868] Oh, my God.

[869] So Carol is from Medford, as I said.

[870] So is the Black Dahlia, by the way.

[871] Oh, that's right.

[872] And so she graduated from Boston College.

[873] Then she went to Suffolk Law School and graduated from there.

[874] The two of them got married in 1985.

[875] and Sheik went on to a lucrative career as a tax attorney.

[876] And Chuck becomes the manager of a fur salon on Newberry Street.

[877] He makes six figures a year, being the manager of a fur salon.

[878] I mean, people like their fur.

[879] I'm covered in it right now.

[880] And I didn't even have to pay anything for it.

[881] Yeah, seriously, if you look at my sweatpants, it looks like I'm the manager of a fur salon as well.

[882] But mine's volunteer.

[883] Right.

[884] okay so they live in no they don't live in Rivia I want them to they live in it looks it is spelled reading but I bet it's reading or some bullshit like that Spell it like you say it The neighbors were later quoted in the paper To say that they remembered the couple Quote lingering over a goodbye kiss each workday morning She'd had no idea she married a monster This kind of was reminding me of the What's the Bay Area one recently?

[885] recently.

[886] Scott Peterson.

[887] Scott Peterson.

[888] Yeah.

[889] Lacey Peterson.

[890] Exactly, because they're both pregnant.

[891] Yeah.

[892] Okay.

[893] So, uh, Chuck's car keys, uh, they turn up in a mission, in the Miss, Mission Hill projects, in Roxbury.

[894] Weird.

[895] And so police add a hundred extra officers to go start kicking indoors.

[896] Ivey.

[897] And randomly frisking young black men looking for the quote, black man with a raspy voice and the black sweatsuit with a red stripe.

[898] Yeah, you can't do that.

[899] They do.

[900] And city councilor David Scandras was quoted as saying, quote, you can't help but wonder if what you're watching is a class situation, that it's all right for the poor to put up with an enormous amount of shootings and killings, but presumably if you're white, upper income and suburban, maybe that changes things.

[901] That's sad.

[902] and Leslie Harris, a public defender, familiar with the case, is quoted in the Boston Globe, is saying, quote, the police kept telling the kids that they'd have to come to take a ride with them.

[903] The way they intimidated these kids into making statements, some heads should roll.

[904] And they really did do that too because two weeks after the shooting, a 15 -year -old boy ends up telling police that his uncle, Willie Bennett, had bragged that he was the killer.

[905] The boy immediately recanted, but the police didn't care because they already had.

[906] the name and they 39 year old willie bennett was also the perfect suspect he had spent most of his adult life in jail and he had a long rap sheet um with instances of violent crime including he once threatened a cop with a shotgun in 1981 so it was it was open and shut right there on november 11th the boston herald gets the scoop and they print that willie bennett is a prime suspect and then a norfolk prosecutor named lewis sabedini calls Bennett a mad dog running amok in the press.

[907] On December 28th, Chuck Stewart picks Bennett out of a police lineup.

[908] And when he did, they say that he had a strong physical reaction when he saw Willie Bennett in the lineup.

[909] Yeah.

[910] So it looks like everyone's like we have our man in this case is solved until the twist.

[911] On January 3rd, 1990, Chuck Stewart's 23 -year -old brother Matthew contacts the DA and asks for a meeting.

[912] And in that meeting, he confesses to a shocking secret.

[913] Turns out the murder was not a black man in a black sweatsuit with a raspy voice.

[914] Carol Stewart and her unborn child had been shot in cold blood by none other than the grieving husband himself, Chuck fucking Stewart.

[915] Dude, this 23 -year -old brother comes forward and is like...

[916] And listen to this shit.

[917] Oh, my God.

[918] Tell me everything.

[919] He says, that his brother asked him to drive by the scene and take the purse that had the gun and the jewelry in it and then go drive the drive and throw that purse with all that evidence in it off the dizzy bridge and into the Pines River and his brother paid him $10 ,000 to do that.

[920] And so basically he said he didn't know.

[921] know that Chuck was going to shoot Carol.

[922] He just had agreed to come by and do this thing for $10 ,000.

[923] So had she already been shot when he did it?

[924] Yeah, he must have because he was getting rid of the gun.

[925] Right.

[926] But Matthew said he didn't know that that was the plan.

[927] He was just there and then was given this bag.

[928] Holy shit.

[929] But once he was there he knew what happened.

[930] And he kept doing Yeah.

[931] So, but he basically so.

[932] Oh, God, is there video of his interrogation or confession?

[933] Oh, I don't know.

[934] I want to watch that.

[935] But there's pictures of him in the paper.

[936] So basically he then kind of talked to the press after this.

[937] But he carry her fucking casket?

[938] Yeah.

[939] That's the next thing I was going to read.

[940] Oh, okay.

[941] Is that no, no, no. Him and his brother, who he confessed to two days later, their older brother, Michael, he went and he told him that this was actually a murder.

[942] And then they went and carried her casket at her funeral, knowing the truth.

[943] Oh, I want to see photos of them carrying the caskets.

[944] Yeah, there's, you can find all of this.

[945] I mean, that's the craziest thing about this entire crime is it was so meticulously and insanely covered in the paper that like every moment of this crime is in the paper.

[946] And Matthew says that he finally came forward when he realized Charles had fingered Willie Bennett for the crime and that he knew an innocent man was going to go to jail for the murder that his brother had committed.

[947] Wow.

[948] And a year later, Matthew Stewart was found guilty of obstruction of justice and insurance fraud.

[949] So he did time for this, for being a part of basically aiding and abetting.

[950] Okay, so now the fucking DA and the authorities know that it's actually Chuck Stewart.

[951] It's like the hardest 180 that all of those people who are like hell bent on the storyline that they have to fucking give it up.

[952] They have to turn it around.

[953] So there's a city wide manhunt for Chuck Stewart.

[954] And it turns out that he had checked in at the Sheridan and Braintree in room 231.

[955] And on the night of January 3rd, he calls down to the front desks and asks for a 4 .30 a .m. wake -up call.

[956] Oh, no. And sunrise on January 4th, 1990, commuters report an unoccupied Nissan Maxima is stopped on the lower deck of the Tobin Bridge.

[957] It's Chuck Stewart's new car that he had bought with the insurance the life insurance payout of Carol's life insurance.

[958] Authorities find a note on the front seat that Stewart wrote that said, quote, My life has been nothing but a battle for the last four months.

[959] Oh, you poor fucking baby.

[960] Whatever this new accusation is, it has beaten me. I've been sapped of my strength.

[961] So he doesn't cop to it.

[962] He doesn't admit it.

[963] He acts like he's been pushed to this because of this accusation.

[964] Where his brother told the truth.

[965] then Chuck Stewart jumped to his death from the Tobin Bridge into the Mystic River.

[966] Did he fake it?

[967] He really did it.

[968] People saw him.

[969] They pulled the body out.

[970] They pulled, did they pull a body out?

[971] That was my next question.

[972] They pulled his body out of the river.

[973] How did I, I yelled this so often.

[974] How have I never heard of this?

[975] I know, isn't it crazy?

[976] I remember seeing this story when I was like in my early 20s and the turn, the way they set up that turn was so perfect because they make you get racist.

[977] They make you go get him.

[978] Yes.

[979] And you see, like, Willie Bennett was brought into, they had him in, in court for the charges.

[980] And he's sitting there, like, in his, you know, jail clothes.

[981] And he's kind of got his hand on his head.

[982] And it is like, and, but of course, when you look at that through the eyes of someone before all of this information, it's like, there's the monster that killed those poor people.

[983] Well, stories like this make you have, make you check.

[984] And, reevaluate what you believe the media tells you and what in the biases you have once you see that everything is a story that's portrayed a certain way.

[985] Yes.

[986] That, you know, might not even be close to the truth.

[987] Yeah.

[988] And it's the implicit bias thing where as a white person, you're reading the news in a way where you don't have, you know, you don't have automatic empathy for people of color or somebody that's different from you that might be seeing this from a totally different.

[989] Or the minute you hear that they were on crack or that the minute you hear that they were a sex worker, Or that they lived in the projects in Mission Hill.

[990] And they don't deserve as much empathy as you do, or they deserve things that happen to them.

[991] When really, these are all things that have been thrown at us to, including the quote, crack epidemic, which you look into it, it was a systematic way to make black people, you know, less powerful to.

[992] Addict them to drugs, send them to jail.

[993] I mean, I mean, fucking look it up, man. I know.

[994] Oh, I mean, and here's the thing, too, you know, these are stories, these kinds of stories, I think, we avoid a lot.

[995] of the time because it's gross injustice it's gross racism we don't want to fuck it up yeah we don't want to tell the story wrong we don't want to get the information wrong or whatever but i think the way everything is happening in this country right now it's part of that thing of people just dropping the fucking storyline that you're holding on to that you're innocent right you didn't do anything you're not racist because you live in a good neighborhood and you don't live in you know or somehow you're immune to things because uh you know but that basically that you should be immune to it that that these kind of crimes that kind of crime is okay yeah if it's happening in that bad quote unquote bad part of town it's not your problem if it's happening over there but if it comes into your part of town then then you know every everyone should go crazy right so it's it's obviously a huge huge issue in the justice system in this country it's a huge issue when you talk about it happening for people for happening for native americans I mean, it's for sex workers, all of it.

[996] It's just the everyone, you're treated differently if you're different than the status quo.

[997] And if you're marginalized and you're not empowered and you don't have fucking money, as we all know.

[998] We need to look into why those things are happening and why people don't have money and why people are addicted to crack and have to sell crack and have to go into sex work or want to go to sex work, of course.

[999] And also kind of more immediately, we have to stop privatized prisons.

[1000] Yeah.

[1001] That people make money for.

[1002] arresting disenfranchised people who have no support, no money, and no representation.

[1003] And then those people are lost in the system and people make money off of it.

[1004] That should not happen.

[1005] It's the same thing of why one person of color will go to prison for selling a certain amount of, a small amount of weed and another fucking white person will talk about the soaps and lotions that they sell and their weed brownie parties and shit.

[1006] And it's fine.

[1007] And it's all fine.

[1008] It's not okay.

[1009] It's not okay.

[1010] And I think these days, that's all coming to the surface.

[1011] People's voices are being raised who need to be heard and need to be listened to where we're all learning about this.

[1012] As like suburban white gals of a certain age, we are now coming to understanding about this in a way that we just didn't know before, didn't ever understand, didn't have to have empathy for before because it simply wasn't in our lives.

[1013] right um okay so all so 73 days after the shooting all of this news breaks everybody is stopped cold does he immediately like how quickly went from when they find out to when he jumps off the bridge it's like a day okay and the boston globe has a headline that reads from nightmare to reality a city is reeling so it's continuing to play out in the press and mayor Flynn calls the case quote, a giant fraud on this city.

[1014] The police and the press and the authorities all blame each other.

[1015] And lots of people claim after the fact that they were skeptical of Chuck Stewart all along.

[1016] But of course, there's very little evidence of that, especially since all of it was in the press.

[1017] Every moment of it, you had your chance to be skeptical.

[1018] And none of those people were skeptical.

[1019] Sure.

[1020] In the least, they not only were skeptical, he was fucking John F. Kennedy.

[1021] Yeah.

[1022] Right.

[1023] The New York Times wrote on January 6, 1990, quote, A vicious round of finger pointing began here today as prosecutors, the police, and the news media, began tracing the trail of faulty assumptions, disregarded suspicions, blunders, and perhaps even lies that put the wrong man at the center of one of the most highly publicized and emotionally charged murder cases in this city's history.

[1024] End quote.

[1025] Mayor Flynn went to the Bennett home to apologize to Willie Bennett and his family.

[1026] telling Mrs. Bennett that, quote, what has taken place has been very unfortunate, unquote.

[1027] I don't know how anything to do with fortune.

[1028] Fortunate or not.

[1029] Not at all.

[1030] The Bennett family later said that Mayor Flynn only stayed a couple of minutes and wouldn't sit down when offered a seat.

[1031] Thanks for the fucking extension of yourself.

[1032] Soon news of Charles Stewart's activities in the weeks before and after the murder comes spilling out of the shadows, just days before he jumped to his death he was in Peabody buying jewelry for his secret younger girlfriend.

[1033] Come on!

[1034] There's also a story that he was angry that having a baby would cut Carol's paycheck from the family coffers.

[1035] So Charles Stewart murdered his wife and baby and took $82 ,000 for all of that trouble had full surgery and then ends up three months later killing himself and then in September 2011 Matthew Stewart his younger brother died from a drug overdose in a Cambridge homeless shelter Jesus obviously his life was entirely destroyed by the entire thing I'll finish with this full quote from David J. Cryjacks article I'm sorry I know I'm pronouncing that wrong quote whatever it's Genesis, the crime picked from open Boston the crime picked open Boston's racial scab 13 years after the busing riots and Stanley Foreman's famous photo of a white teenager using old glory as a lance against Ted Lansmark, a black man. When Stewart's deceptions were exposed the Globe called him quote a world -class con man but he really wasn't.

[1036] Prisons are full of spouse killers after all but Boston's police and the public enabled Stewart with their eagerness to accept his story.

[1037] Michael Curry, president of the Boston NAACP, is not sure that the case would play out any differently today.

[1038] Quote, it still has relevance.

[1039] We still live every day with the preconceived notions of black and brown boys as, quote, potential criminals.

[1040] Stuart played on those prejudices.

[1041] He said to himself, if I had to accuse somebody of a crime, who would I accuse, and where would it be?

[1042] A black man in Roxbury, Dorchester, Matapan.

[1043] He knew everyone would believe him and you know what?

[1044] He was right.

[1045] And that's the story of the murder of Carol Stewart.

[1046] Holy fucking shit.

[1047] Isn't that fucked?

[1048] Oh my God, dude.

[1049] I mean, Willie Bennett was a dead man. He was gone.

[1050] Like, that he was going to go to prison for the rest.

[1051] He was going to be killed in prison.

[1052] They wanted to reinstate the death penalty.

[1053] So fucked up.

[1054] I feel.

[1055] Yeah.

[1056] It's so fucked up.

[1057] The brother is also a tragic fucking character in it.

[1058] I mean, because he did the right thing.

[1059] That's the same.

[1060] I'm surprised he didn't get immunity for testifying against his brother.

[1061] But it wouldn't have mattered.

[1062] It would have been off the table at that.

[1063] I mean, maybe there was going to, but because there wasn't a trial, they needed to give someone.

[1064] Right.

[1065] Get someone.

[1066] Yeah.

[1067] And yeah, you know those cops were like, get somebody.

[1068] Somebody has to do something to somebody.

[1069] Immunity probably became off the table once he.

[1070] And I bet you he didn't, they didn't seem.

[1071] like maybe his brother had money but they like in the pictures where he's pointing to things and stuff it's not like they seem like this rich family if he didn't have a good lawyer that wasn't going to happen yeah yeah and you can't reward a person for aiding and abetting no i mean i i totally get that and i but still yeah holy shitballs that was fucked up it's pretty fucked great job telling it i mean was as i was reading it i i went back and forth and back and forth because it's like I don't I don't want to continually ignore those stories that we seem to be like they they seem to be problematic in and of themselves yeah but they do need to get talked about and and there are the stories that like I think we try to do the outer edges of these are the crazy these are the crazy crime stories but these are actually just the tragic standard uh you know yeah injustice based type of stories yeah and if you want to I feel like the crime epidemic, I mean, the crack epidemic thing is like, look in the way, look at the way this opioid epidemic is being handled, which is mainly white people versus the way that crack epidemic was handled.

[1072] Yes.

[1073] And you'll see how big of a difference you're treated depending on your race.

[1074] That's right.

[1075] Because people are going to prison for dealing opioids.

[1076] People are getting, you know, rehab and being constantly treated with kid gloves for the opioid crisis, which, just awful.

[1077] I completely agree.

[1078] But yeah, there was never an article in like the New York Times about how do we help these people with the crack epidemic.

[1079] It was the perfect tool and look at these crack addicted people.

[1080] It's a perfect dehumanizing tool.

[1081] And everybody felt most most people, white people fell for it.

[1082] Right.

[1083] Or just bought that storyline.

[1084] Yeah.

[1085] Totally.

[1086] Well, great job.

[1087] Thank you.

[1088] Should we do a fucking hooray?

[1089] Yeah, that's the time.

[1090] I know mine.

[1091] okay um uh i just keep touching my elbow oh my broken elbow my broken elbow it's fucking the new season of shits creek has come out your baby my baby i watched it i accidentally woke up at 530 which i do sometimes god and then i remembered that it had come out and i watched it i think i watched all of it at least like almost all of it before work and then i came home and finished it and it's just as beautiful and hilarious and great as it was last time, even more so.

[1092] And it's just, if you haven't gotten into Schitt's Creek, it's a little diamond waiting for you.

[1093] I'm excited to watch it.

[1094] On Netflix.

[1095] I love that it's waiting there for me. Oh, and I got a sweatshirt.

[1096] Do you, have you watched it?

[1097] No. Okay.

[1098] What's the say?

[1099] There's a family store that they open.

[1100] Oh, you got a sweatshirt of it?

[1101] It's called Rose's Apothecary, and I got sent a sweatshirt of it.

[1102] And I was so excited.

[1103] Have you worn it?

[1104] I want people to like to call it out.

[1105] No, because it just turned cold like yesterday.

[1106] That's true.

[1107] I'm cold by like 72.

[1108] Yeah, exactly.

[1109] The light wind kicked up yesterday.

[1110] I had, so my, uh, fucking hooray, I woke up the other day late in, late in the morning like I do.

[1111] And I had this and I did the whole like, God, you got to wake up earlier and get more shit done.

[1112] And I had this epiphany of, um, that I, like one out of 10 effort, I'm, I consistently work at like a six, a good six.

[1113] and considering my life that's gone pretty well but I would think but my new thing is that I want to just put one extra point of effort into my life and I made it kind of all seem doable in this like all you have to do is walk for half one like what is what is the one point of effort more than what you're doing right now.

[1114] Yes.

[1115] Don't start drinking at five, start drinking at eight or take tonight off or yeah go for a walk is that one point of extra effort.

[1116] flake today on this thing it's like that's good so I'm doing that and I'm I'm thinking that that might help some people too because I'm always like you have to be a 10 if you're not a 10 you're not fucking good enough that's the that's the trick of perfectionism right is if you're not perfect fuck it right which is the which is deadly yeah you know it's so funny it's very true because since I started swimming and it was very difficult for me to not be able to brag about swimming is is an extra two points you get another.

[1117] And once you do that, you fold in this effort, then all the, the rest of the day, like the hardest thing about writing in a room is that there's literally a table filled with all the good stuff from Trader Joe's that just sits behind me all day.

[1118] Like what?

[1119] Tell me, like what?

[1120] Oh, well, there's every type of chip.

[1121] Like, we have, there's just like a chip station.

[1122] Yes.

[1123] Flight.

[1124] Oh, I'm glad I'm so glad I'm about a TV writer.

[1125] It's because you sit there thinking and while you're thinking you think you think you can't think of anything so you eat chips totally or like there's just like a big this that new quote shareable bag of m &Ms there's all kinds of things my thing is I did my I already did my thing it makes me feel really good now I'm just gonna like I drink some tea and try to not graze that's great yeah because you don't want to you don't want to um what's the word like sabotage yes do you know what desabotage desabotage desabotage my swimming effort so that's yeah so I look at it and it's like I don't ever have to be a 10 Me as a six or seven has done pretty fucking good in her life.

[1126] And I have a good and happy life.

[1127] If I give a half or one point of effort more, how great would that be?

[1128] Exactly.

[1129] So I'm going to do that.

[1130] That's great.

[1131] I don't know what to call it yet.

[1132] One point more?

[1133] One point more.

[1134] One point extra effort.

[1135] One point of extra effort.

[1136] It falls off the tongue.

[1137] It just falls face first off the tongue.

[1138] It's perfect.

[1139] I think that's great.

[1140] Also, because, you know, I believe the Japanese.

[1141] have a thing called Kaizen, and that's just small improvements daily.

[1142] And it's essentially like you, like, it's exactly what you're saying, which is you don't have to be the perfect consummate housewife, just do the dishes like real time.

[1143] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[1144] That's my thing.

[1145] My dad all growing up, my dad would always go, clean as you go, clean as you go.

[1146] And I never do it.

[1147] I just let things pile up.

[1148] Yeah.

[1149] And lately I've been cleaning as I go.

[1150] Yeah, let's do that with our lives.

[1151] Let's clean our lives as we go.

[1152] Let's clean as we go.

[1153] It feels better.

[1154] Also, new season of someone knows something is really good.

[1155] Also, if you're sick of listening about murder all the time, but you still have true crime and which I'm listening with Vince now because he doesn't like murder.

[1156] Right.

[1157] But we are listening to Last Scene podcast, which I also found in Boston.

[1158] Scene S -C -E -N?

[1159] Last Scene, S -E -N.

[1160] Like the last time I saw something.

[1161] Last Scene is a podcast from the Boston Globe about the 28 -year unsolved art heist of Boston's ILABella Stewart Gardner Museum.

[1162] It's fucking good and it's true crime, but it's not murder, which is great.

[1163] I think I looked that story up.

[1164] That's how I found it.

[1165] When we're in a town, we're like, what murder can I?

[1166] So you look up all these crimes?

[1167] And I found last scene and I'm like, that one's great.

[1168] Was that the one where they were dressed like cops?

[1169] They broke into a museum.

[1170] They're dressed like cops.

[1171] There's some great characters in it.

[1172] I fucking highly recommend this podcast.

[1173] That sounds really good.

[1174] And, of course, someone knows something, which is immediately making me cry already.

[1175] Hosted by Hot Canadian, Lumberjack.

[1176] With all the empathy, David Rijin.

[1177] With just a great voice.

[1178] Great cadence.

[1179] You just want to be there with him while he discovers things.

[1180] Yeah, he's great.

[1181] New season, I love it.

[1182] We're not getting paid even.

[1183] David, you owe us money.

[1184] David, we fully support you.

[1185] And also, can I just say this?

[1186] This is from, this is left over long ago.

[1187] But at the London show that we did in May, so long ago now, I did Jack the Ripper and had kind of an emotional meltdown while I had it.

[1188] Didn't really realize what a bad idea that would be.

[1189] No, it was great.

[1190] It was fine, but it was one of those bad, it was just a bad feeling area, and then it was, but it was a great show.

[1191] And we met great people at that meet and greet was epic.

[1192] Every person we met at the London meet and greet was one more fascinating character.

[1193] That's where the Italians were.

[1194] Oh, yeah.

[1195] And all kinds of people.

[1196] Anyway, a woman, and I'm sorry I don't have your name, you recommended the book to me. They all love Jack.

[1197] And it is the best.

[1198] I've been listening to it on audio book since she recommended it because it is so dense.

[1199] And it's the guy, I don't look it up.

[1200] Can you look it up, Stephen, sorry.

[1201] They don't, they all love Jack.

[1202] It's the Jack the Ripper.

[1203] Oh.

[1204] And it's written by the guy who wrote the movie with Nail and I, that brilliant movie.

[1205] It's an 80s, like, cult movie.

[1206] And it is one of my favorite movie.

[1207] of all time.

[1208] It's about two actors that are totally on drugs that try to leave London and just get out into the country for the weekend.

[1209] And it's beyond hilarious.

[1210] So Bruce Robinson.

[1211] Bruce Robinson is the writer of the movie With Nail and I and he has written this scathing expose about Ripperology and the bullshit that has been put out and what the truth of like who Jack the Ripper was.

[1212] And I've been listening to it on and off because it's so dense and the writing is so good.

[1213] Like, he quotes somebody and he says like, he's somebody that's telling a lie and covering something up.

[1214] And so he does the thing and he writes, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[1215] And say the guy's name is Dan Smith.

[1216] And he goes, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[1217] Dan Smith's shit mouth.

[1218] Like, it's writing like that where I keep, I keep going back and re -listening to whole chunks because the writing is unbelievably great.

[1219] Are we just having a conversation right now over pints because he's being he is such a bitch about like how basically over the years where biology has been taken the lies that have been put out and just gone yes yes yes dramatic and and this adding on and adding on bullshit like Halloween fucking candy poisoning it's a total Halloween candy poisoning situation meanwhile Bruce Robinson goes in and does the research and is like it's blatantly obvious what the situation is I highly what's it called again they all love Jack okay by Bruce Robinson I recommend you do it on audio because the guy that reads the audiobook is so talented and does goes in and out in and out of voices.

[1220] It's great.

[1221] And anyway, thank you to the person.

[1222] Please email if you are the person who recommended that book to me so I can say your name because it was it was such a great recommendation.

[1223] But it's the kind of thing that like a year later, I'm like, I finally read it.

[1224] I finally did.

[1225] Listen to it.

[1226] We get a lot of really good recommendations and gifts.

[1227] Yeah.

[1228] And life.

[1229] Best life.

[1230] Tweeted us what your one point extra would be.

[1231] Oh, nice.

[1232] Maybe, right?

[1233] Like, my one point extra is that I will do the dishes as they come.

[1234] Sure.

[1235] That's not mine.

[1236] The example is.

[1237] A clean as you go or a, yeah, whatever.

[1238] Drinking more hot tea.

[1239] Remember, tea is a medicine.

[1240] Yeah, and add some vodka if you're me. Jesus, I sound like an alcoholic this episode.

[1241] I'm really not.

[1242] Also, if you're going to add anything to a hot drink, don't let it be vodka.

[1243] out.

[1244] I don't know why you keep saying that.

[1245] Rum.

[1246] And maybe Malibu Coconut rum.

[1247] We're also not getting paid by them.

[1248] We should be.

[1249] Hey, thanks for listening.

[1250] Thanks for editing so much shit out.

[1251] You guys don't even fucking understand how much shit.

[1252] Even doing his work tonight.

[1253] And then finding names that we can't remember all the stuff.

[1254] I mean, we always need you to do that, Stephen.

[1255] That's kind of standard.

[1256] I now don't even attempt to look things up.

[1257] I'm just like, eh, just kind of look over my shoulder.

[1258] Yeah, and he's already got his phone up.

[1259] Steven.

[1260] Steven.

[1261] Thanks for listening.

[1262] You guys are the fucking best.

[1263] You guys, really, so many great things are happening in our lives.

[1264] We say this all the time at the live shows, but we mean it to you guys too at home.

[1265] Don't go to live shows and maybe aren't even interested.

[1266] We really feel very, very grateful for all the things that we have because of the way that this show exploded.

[1267] It's super nuts.

[1268] Our lives are nuts because of it.

[1269] But in the best possible way, we're just very grateful.

[1270] So thank you.

[1271] We're grateful that you guys have found.

[1272] each other and start of this community and we just get to be a peripherally part of it and enjoy it and hear stories about it hear stories and see you guys make connections and raise money for good causes and you know find yourselves and go to therapy and get tattoos and get cool tattoos and get and have art that gets made and we're just lucky to be part of it we really appreciate it and it's very cool to be part of the podcast the wave of the future which is podcasting everyone knows it everyone knows it get on board.

[1273] Listen.

[1274] Stay sexy.

[1275] And don't get murdered.

[1276] Goodbye.

[1277] Elvis, you want a cookie?