My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark XX
[0] This is exactly right.
[1] Hey, this is exciting.
[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.
[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.
[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.
[5] Who killed Saz?
[6] And were they really after Charles?
[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?
[8] This season, murder hits close to home.
[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.
[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.
[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.
[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?
[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.
[14] Only Martyrs in the Building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.
[15] Goodbye.
[16] Yes, we haven't gotten one wrong yet.
[17] We practice and practice backstage.
[18] Mm -hmm.
[19] Where are we?
[20] How do you pronounce it?
[21] Columbus.
[22] Woo.
[23] What a beautiful theater.
[24] Gorgeous theater.
[25] Gorgeous.
[26] We got a fun fact on the way over here about this theater that it was a vaudeville theater and downstairs in like catering it was where they had the animals come in for vaudeville.
[27] Like all the dogs in their valet costumes and shit.
[28] Aw.
[29] What's funny is we didn't ask what animals.
[30] That's Georgia's cartoon.
[31] of this theater in 1920.
[32] You just wrote it in your head.
[33] Poodles in fucking ballet costumes.
[34] Poodle show.
[35] Poodle show.
[36] That's the most famous ballet of all.
[37] You know it.
[38] It's the sugar plum fairy from the neckraker.
[39] With poodles.
[40] I pictured on the animal ramp just like 100 elephants.
[41] It was just like, these people are amazing.
[42] They got all those camels and elephants and rhinocerosy out here.
[43] Mm -hmm.
[44] In my mind, it was Poodle, doodle doodles.
[45] Poodles Time.
[46] Welcome to Poodles Time, everybody.
[47] Thank you so much for coming.
[48] You bought special tickets to Poodle's Time.
[49] We appreciate it.
[50] It's the official pre -show of the Puppy Bowl.
[51] That's right.
[52] Who's excited?
[53] Talking Puppy Bowl.
[54] For the Talking Puppy Bowl.
[55] We're going to introduce Chris Hardwick.
[56] We're all going to come out, talk about what might happen, what happened last year.
[57] Yep.
[58] Remember when that one drank the water?
[59] Fuck.
[60] That was the best.
[61] That was the best.
[62] You can see it in your mind again, huh?
[63] Oh, my God.
[64] What's the music behind puppies drinking water?
[65] Oh, well.
[66] Well, they're not drinking out of fucking FBI glasses.
[67] Oh, shit shaw.
[68] Here, thank you.
[69] They stand up and shoot us.
[70] Please sit down.
[71] You're not in charge right now, FBI.
[72] Jesus.
[73] Power tripping.
[74] Still standing, still talking.
[75] Let's break this shit.
[76] Thank you.
[77] Yeah, thanks.
[78] Is what we meant to say.
[79] Can you hear me breathing in this mic?
[80] This sound system is insane because it sounds like the voices are coming from behind me. And that's, when you're the one talking, it's kind of upsetting.
[81] Well, that's the ghost.
[82] Oh, is that a ghost?
[83] That's a ghost?
[84] That's the ghost of a dead poodle.
[85] The human voice of a ghost of a dead.
[86] Oh, why are we talking about dead dogs?
[87] It's fun.
[88] It's funny.
[89] That's a bummer.
[90] It's funny.
[91] Oh, did you know what the show is about?
[92] I have bad news for you.
[93] Oh, no, I think security really is coming for those FBI agents.
[94] Oh, well.
[95] Oh, shit.
[96] No, no, no, you know what it is?
[97] Oh.
[98] Someone tweeted this.
[99] I was eavesdropping.
[100] On Twitter.
[101] You get your own individual usher at this theater to walk you to your seat.
[102] Each and every person?
[103] I mean, they could have been lying, but...
[104] Ohio, you got some fucking class going on.
[105] Balcony's like, we did too!
[106] Because no one knows where they're going.
[107] They look at the balcony ticket and they're like, you're on your own.
[108] Figure it out.
[109] If you want your own individual usher, you've got to kick down that cheddar.
[110] Never said that word before.
[111] As money.
[112] Never.
[113] Cheddar as money.
[114] Cheddar is money.
[115] Karen, I have to tell you guys something.
[116] It's really upsetting.
[117] Karen tried to steal someone's purse last night.
[118] Look.
[119] I had...
[120] I needed money for my children.
[121] That's how it starts.
[122] Having children?
[123] Yes.
[124] Last night at the meet and greet, these gals woke up.
[125] There's a problem with me. I make a lot of assumptions in my mind and then just go with it.
[126] It's a fun way to live, but you can be deeply wrong often.
[127] And these two women walked up and they had clutch purses and they had with, I think, like, sequins sewed on our logo onto these two clutch purses.
[128] Beautiful clutch purses when they were walking towards, I understand, they were walking towards us, like, showing us.
[129] Oh my God, look like, they did.
[130] So I'm all like, this is amazing and I open it up.
[131] I'm like, Why is she giving me this old checkbook?
[132] I don't want that.
[133] I don't want this shit.
[134] Birth control pills.
[135] What the fuck?
[136] That was really awkward.
[137] It was super, the moment I realized I'm looking into a woman's purse, who I met three and a half seconds ago, I was all like, ha, loving your purse.
[138] You're not giving you something.
[139] And then we were like, oh, they're gorgeous.
[140] We had to, like, play a real.
[141] Well, they were, but I wanted one.
[142] You know.
[143] Don't bring two.
[144] That's a real, that was a real mind fuck.
[145] Well, she was a lawyer, so I think she's used to getting, catching people in weird situations.
[146] Are you here?
[147] No. Oh, you love lawyers.
[148] There's one lawyer.
[149] Oh, these are people that got off on huge crimes.
[150] Lawyer groupies.
[151] You can't prove anything.
[152] In shit.
[153] Hearsay.
[154] Let's throw out more legal comments.
[155] Um, approach the bench.
[156] Approach the bench.
[157] Order in the court.
[158] I'm just panicking, going through every law and order I've ever seen.
[159] Argumentative, Your Honor.
[160] Welcome to my favorite burger, everybody.
[161] Welcome to my favorite dads that were dragged along.
[162] Don't know what this is.
[163] Yes, it's going to get worse.
[164] More confusing.
[165] More confusing.
[166] More inside baseball.
[167] Yeah.
[168] But you guys get the Super Bowl, so calm down.
[169] No, women like that stuff too, right?
[170] Absolutely.
[171] Everything's fair.
[172] Even.
[173] Snacks.
[174] I just love the snacks.
[175] Have you seen that picture online?
[176] That's the person who made a cold -cut Super Bowl.
[177] Like a stadium?
[178] Then you just peel off pieces of ham.
[179] Off a ham stadium.
[180] Have you ever seen that?
[181] I bet that person is super chill.
[182] That person's just chill.
[183] It's just a person who is chill about meat.
[184] It's not that big of a deal.
[185] She doesn't, or he doesn't tell you where to eat from first or get mad at you, you know, in the corner.
[186] Why are you eating from the middle?
[187] Try the olive loaf front door.
[188] Is there a front door to a stadium?
[189] Probably.
[190] A front and back, two side doors.
[191] Speaking of delicious food and beautiful food.
[192] So we went on our way here, we were in Cleveland yesterday and on our way today.
[193] Thank you.
[194] Thank you.
[195] We stopped by your incredible vintage shop called Flower Child.
[196] Oh, my God.
[197] Oh, my God.
[198] Oh, my God.
[199] It was just troubling.
[200] And we were like, well, what do we get for the hometown person to the person who comes up to read the hometown?
[201] And Karen found something magical.
[202] Do you want to tell them about it?
[203] I would love to thank you, Georgia.
[204] This is creative cooking with aluminum foil.
[205] It's a wonderful recipe book from, I don't know if you looked it up.
[206] My guess is 72.
[207] I think it was 60 something.
[208] thing.
[209] What's your guess?
[210] 69.
[211] Okay, uh, $15 ,000?
[212] Yeah, okay.
[213] That's always our bet.
[214] We never do less than that.
[215] Can you see?
[216] Ah, 67.
[217] Yeah.
[218] You're closest.
[219] All right, well, I win the, I win the cookbook.
[220] That's weird.
[221] Oh, you don't want that money?
[222] Okay, cool.
[223] Oh, I marked two, uh, recipes.
[224] Okay.
[225] That are special.
[226] One is molded seafood salad.
[227] Like a jello mold.
[228] Where's the aluminum foil come in?
[229] It doesn't matter.
[230] You eat it.
[231] You tear it up into tiny pieces.
[232] You make a thing out of it, and you scrape your tongue off after you eat it, because it's so disgusting.
[233] You actually, you put it on the orange zester.
[234] You use it to make it into a key to unlock the handcuffs you've been put in that are force -feeding you to eat this shit.
[235] I thought you meant to unlock the key to the front door of the meat stadium.
[236] Either one.
[237] Also, tuna tempties.
[238] Can you just read what's in a tuna tempter?
[239] A quarter pound of American cheese.
[240] cubed.
[241] Right off the fucking bat.
[242] Why don't they...
[243] This is before integrations because today, if it was a book like this, it would be a Velvita brand T .M. Fucking...
[244] This is, okay.
[245] This is by Eleanor Lynch, by the way.
[246] Oh, hell yeah.
[247] A can of tuna.
[248] Great.
[249] A green pepper.
[250] You got some greens in there.
[251] Nice.
[252] An onion, a pickle, salad dressing.
[253] Salad pepper.
[254] Hamburger or Frankfurt or bun.
[255] Oh, hamburger buns.
[256] Sorry.
[257] Wait.
[258] Where'd we go?
[259] I think it's just a tuna melt and we made a better name now for it But that's the kind of thing my mom would make She would call it Catch's Catch Can And she would just combine everything that was in the pantry She'd be like You know we're gonna have tuna sandwiches on hot dog buns Sit down It's gonna be so fun No No No No yeah no And that's that And there's just a one final page by the Alzheimer's Association in the back that's like don't eat anything in this recipe book if you care about your memories there's literally a single page uh marked salads it's pretty great it's probably my favorite thing it's just like whatever salad you make go ahead putting some aluminum foil on top of that bowl put it in the refrigerator the frigidere the frigidere um or the icebox did stephen think you were kidding when you said to put that one slide up that he made it didn't matter because he wants this slide he wanted it up so it better be up because we because he sent us this he made if he took I don't know how long that takes to make this shit but whatever it is he's not getting fucking paid for the time ask him hey if there's anything interesting going on in the towns we're going to give us a little fucking email about it because we're we don't know what's going on half the time anywhere like not even our own town yes exactly so we're just like any updates stuff that we need to know whatever and um Steve Even in his, we called, I started calling it the Hot Cheat, it sarcastically.
[260] And today is one of the pieces of information about Columbus.
[261] Don't say, I want to show them.
[262] Is connected to, then he goes, maybe you guys want to use this slide.
[263] Of course, I immediately respond, fuck yeah.
[264] Is it a yes?
[265] Go back one?
[266] Okay.
[267] Vince.
[268] Vince.
[269] On it.
[270] Holding it down for us.
[271] We hear that there's someone here from your town that's really special.
[272] and so Hey Welcome to Flavortown People who already live in Flavortown He made it We've made it to Flavortown Boom I don't know how to high What if I just didn't know how to high five this whole time Also it's What's very funny is within the little paragraph Stephen included the factoid That his real name is Guy Ferry Like a boat Yeah People are bummed I'm sorry.
[273] There's a bunch of Italian Americans in the audience who are livid right now.
[274] Yeah.
[275] I met him in Cleveland, remember?
[276] Oh, yeah.
[277] Remember when you weren't there?
[278] Anyway.
[279] Tell it.
[280] I don't know.
[281] That's a good funny anecdote.
[282] So I was on...
[283] Get your hand off your hip and tell these people that story.
[284] Okay.
[285] I was in Cleveland with a fancy food show and he was really nice and he invited myself in my friend Allie.
[286] We did cocktails on stage to like make a cocktail.
[287] cocktail versus bands.
[288] And it was really scary because I'd never been in front of more than like 30 people on a stage of my life and it was like the size of this room.
[289] Now I don't care, but we did and we brought this cocktail and I was this like Thanksgiving yam cocktail and she went to shake the cocktail and the top flew off and yams flew all over everyone on stage including Guy Fieri.
[290] Blended up yams?
[291] Cocktail yams.
[292] With whiskey.
[293] Shit.
[294] And the crowd was mad at us.
[295] because we spilled Yam on their Lord and Savior.
[296] He was really nice.
[297] He never spoke to us again.
[298] He was very, he laughed.
[299] Oh, he didn't do some follow -up hangs and emails?
[300] No, he didn't want to hang out after that.
[301] It's weird.
[302] I thought Hollywood was different than that.
[303] What did he say on stage when things spilled?
[304] He laughed.
[305] He was very sweet about it.
[306] There's a photo of me in a vintage dress hugging him with yam all over the place.
[307] He was very sweet about it.
[308] He didn't do any.
[309] hand gestures or anything.
[310] He didn't go like this.
[311] He didn't.
[312] Cabam?
[313] Cabam?
[314] I'm not a fan.
[315] I don't know what he said.
[316] It's cabam.
[317] I don't watch his stuff.
[318] I just love him.
[319] It's definitely cabam.
[320] It's not cabam.
[321] I don't know, yeah.
[322] My mom.
[323] Should we?
[324] Is it down?
[325] I guess so.
[326] It's cold weather business, but like, I just don't, I can't keep a shoe clean in this cold weather situation.
[327] Every time we look down, it looks like I've been going, like this on my shoes.
[328] I swear I haven't.
[329] I thought you didn't have shoes on because they look like you have socks on, but you don't.
[330] I'm just wearing my gym jams.
[331] Jammies.
[332] Oh, they used the good tablecloth.
[333] Thank you.
[334] So much.
[335] Oh, great.
[336] Oh, yeah.
[337] This was not balled up in the back of someone's car at all.
[338] They were probably like, what?
[339] Why the fuck did they need a tablecloth?
[340] No one was screaming about a tablecloth.
[341] Vince was not saying it was on the rider.
[342] Nobody was doing that.
[343] Now, what?
[344] And they want to...
[345] Women aren't supposed to be alone on stage?
[346] Jesus.
[347] Everybody knows that live podcasts are made and broken by the oriental rugs that they're done upon.
[348] A hundred percent.
[349] Our worst show is when we were on an IKEA rug.
[350] Oh, those weird patterns, squares and stuff.
[351] So distracting.
[352] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.
[353] Absolutely.
[354] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash.
[355] Exactly.
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[370] Important note, that promo code is all lowercase.
[371] Go to Shopify .com.
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[373] That's Shopify .com slash murder.
[374] Goodbye.
[375] Hey, this is exciting.
[376] An all new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.
[377] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.
[378] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.
[379] Who killed Saz?
[380] And were they really after Charles?
[381] Why would someone want to kill Charles?
[382] This season, murder hits close to home.
[383] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.
[384] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.
[385] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.
[386] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?
[387] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Meryl Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVey, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.
[388] Only Martyrs in the Building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.
[389] Goodbye.
[390] Hi.
[391] Hi.
[392] Um, I go first?
[393] You go first.
[394] You guys.
[395] Ohio.
[396] You guys.
[397] Are you ready for your angel of death, Donald Harvey?
[398] Oh.
[399] Oh, shit.
[400] Oh, shit is right.
[401] Okay.
[402] April.
[403] Here's the one thing I know about all angels of death.
[404] Yes.
[405] They love a transition lens.
[406] They just fucking.
[407] They love an 80s math teacher glass.
[408] Glasses situation for themselves.
[409] Afternoon to evening?
[410] I mean, yeah, exactly.
[411] They're like, I might want to step outside the hospital door and have a quick smoke before I go kill nine more people.
[412] But I don't want the trouble of changing my glasses.
[413] I'm not going to change into different glasses.
[414] Yeah, that's high maintenance.
[415] Help me, lens crafters, they all say.
[416] It's true.
[417] God, I don't want to disappoint you.
[418] What's the photo?
[419] I have a photo of him.
[420] We'll take a look.
[421] In April, 1987.
[422] Ding.
[423] Where's Karen in 1987?
[424] 087.
[425] It's a senior year of high school, so I'm at the bottom of a Mickey's Big Mouth.
[426] Trying to explain to someone, probably, I'm trying to explain to my father how the words of Depeche Mode's people are people are actually about him and his racist problems.
[427] Listen to the words, dad.
[428] Do you hear that?
[429] People, it doesn't matter.
[430] And I swear to God, this was a real conversation my dad and I had.
[431] And the tape was in the tape deck.
[432] and I was crying outside of my dance studio telling him to listen to the words and finally just sitting there pretending to listen to the words and I went to say something else and he goes I get it!
[433] Be nice to people!
[434] Children.
[435] 87, baby.
[436] 87.
[437] All right.
[438] Well, in 1987 at Drake Hospital, 44 -year -old John Powell, he had been in a coma for several months ever since a motorcycle accident.
[439] He died from complications of pneumonia.
[440] In Ohio, it turns out that when you're in a car accident, an autopsy is required.
[441] So...
[442] Yeah, that is a good idea.
[443] Yeah.
[444] Insurance companies, man. They are fucking...
[445] On it.
[446] In it and on it.
[447] And about it.
[448] And around it.
[449] Loving it.
[450] Okay.
[451] So, coroner, Dr. Lee Lehman, he's a forensic...
[452] Yes, he's a forensic psychologist.
[453] He has a...
[454] background in biochemistry.
[455] So he's probably a blast at parties.
[456] He's like, guess what this one will do to you?
[457] Take it.
[458] Zip, zap.
[459] So he's like, great, probably getting ready to go to lunch.
[460] He's like, I'll just do this one real quick.
[461] It'll be fine.
[462] And no big deal.
[463] But, no, it turns out, he suddenly smells the faint smell of almonds.
[464] Oh, shit.
[465] That's right.
[466] It's a fucking almond croissant.
[467] No, it's cyanide.
[468] And did you know that only 60 % of people can smell that cyanide?
[469] Oh, wow.
[470] Isn't that interesting?
[471] So he hadn't been one of those people, you know.
[472] I wonder if that's part of being a doctor.
[473] That's like after you take your boards, then there's the smell test.
[474] They never talk about it.
[475] Yeah, but they make you pay for school and take your boards and then they make you smell it.
[476] And then they're like pulling out that croissant, like, let's see if you're going to be a doctor.
[477] Oh, sorry.
[478] Go be a dentist.
[479] That's right.
[480] I slammed dentists.
[481] Karen's got a deep -seated matron.
[482] I do.
[483] Look at these fucking teeth.
[484] Okay, so authorities are like, oh shit, and they start looking into John's family, of course, friends.
[485] They all take lie detector tests and nobody had been giving him cyanide.
[486] Turns out.
[487] Well, they were a great liar.
[488] No. And then they were like, well, let's check all the people who had come in contact with him at the hospital, of course.
[489] So all the nurses and everyone, they are cleared.
[490] And then when it's this dude's Donald Harvey's turn to take a lie detector test, he's fucking sick that day.
[491] Oh.
[492] Oh, red flag.
[493] It's 87.
[494] So how did he call in sick?
[495] What's up?
[496] Top and bottom.
[497] The entirety of the phone.
[498] Then, so when they question him, he immediately is like, yeah, I fucking did it.
[499] Immediately?
[500] Yeah.
[501] He doesn't try to lie.
[502] Like, I did it because I felt bad for him.
[503] He was suffering, et cetera, blah, blah, blah.
[504] And so police are like, okay, great.
[505] But they didn't know it at the time, but they had just ended the run of one of the most prolific serial killers of all time.
[506] Fuck.
[507] Donald Harvey, the Angel of Death.
[508] Of all time, Columbus.
[509] Yeah.
[510] They're like, we've got a ton of those.
[511] Don't worry about it.
[512] He's not the only one.
[513] So Donald was born.
[514] It's also, he's, never mind.
[515] Tell me the secret in front of them Okay, well he worked in Cincinnati I just didn't want anyone to be mad at me She said I just I just didn't want anyone to be mad You can't control them that way If I don't say the word Cincinnati Everyone will stay happy the whole show They don't even know what they're cheering for At this point Cyanide?
[516] What's wrong with you guys?
[517] Why do you love cyanide in Cincinnati?
[518] Okay Donald Harvey is born in Butler County, Ohio in 1952.
[519] You, you, you.
[520] Such a nice county.
[521] That man in the tuxedo's there the whole time.
[522] He's leading everyone to their seats.
[523] In Butler County, everyone has a personal usher all day.
[524] They're known for it.
[525] He, okay, shortly after his birth, his parents moved to Boonville, Kentucky.
[526] Small community.
[527] Yep, up in the balcony.
[528] Boonville, baby.
[529] Yep.
[530] Um, at six months old, father falls asleep while he's holding him.
[531] Clonk hits his fucking head.
[532] Oh.
[533] Falls asleep.
[534] Yeah.
[535] And at five years old...
[536] Sorry, I could have done it with an actual...
[537] I do it with my hand and immediately take a real sip.
[538] Oh, lost opportunities.
[539] Let's do it again.
[540] Do it over.
[541] Okay.
[542] And then at five years old, he has another fucking head injury.
[543] I'm not saying the one leads to the other It doesn't fit there Sorry it doesn't fit there So his mother Goldie insists that he was brought up in a loving family environment He was a happy child Looks like all his teachers Were thought he was great And he had a great childhood But then it's like no actually He was molested from four years old to 20 years old What the fuck?
[544] By two different fucking men His uncle and his fucking neighbor So I think mom is Golden and Goldie over her eyes more than anything else.
[545] She's doing a little bit of, we had the best time.
[546] By the way, we forgot to tell the rules that this is a true crime comedy podcast.
[547] We're not laughing at, I guess we're laughing.
[548] It's too late.
[549] It's way too late.
[550] Please, butler yourself out if you don't like it.
[551] If you raise your hand, someone will come grab you.
[552] But also, if you were the mother of someone who ends up being one of the most prolific serial killers of all time, you're going to go into fucking full denial mode anyway.
[553] Or you're probably very good at it.
[554] it.
[555] It's no one's fault.
[556] It's not my fault.
[557] Certainly not my fault.
[558] So, but he was well -liked by all his teachers, but his, it seems like he liked, he was better with adults than with children, you know.
[559] Me too.
[560] He was super smart, but he was bored, so he drops out of high school.
[561] In 1970, his mother asked him to take care of his sick grandfather, who had been placed in Marymount Hospital in London, Kentucky.
[562] And he's like, great, I'm there.
[563] I'd love to be there.
[564] I love it.
[565] I think he's like 18 years old this time, which what 18 year old doesn't want to go?
[566] God, is it some kind of a convalescent hospital?
[567] That would be perfect for me. I'm there.
[568] Absolutely.
[569] That's my summer vacation.
[570] He spends a lot of time at the hospital so much that the nuns who worked there, like loved this guy.
[571] He's a sweet baby angel.
[572] And so one of the nuns asked Harvey if he wanted to work there as an orderly.
[573] And he's like, yes.
[574] And then she slapped him across the face.
[575] Is that what they do?
[576] 800 people just had flashbacks in this audience.
[577] What are 800 people?
[578] Yeah, there's got to be.
[579] Okay.
[580] Even though he wasn't trained as a nurse, his duties required him to spend long hours, not long, but a lot of time with patients alone.
[581] Some of his duties included changing bedpans, inserting catheters, and passing out medications.
[582] The fun stuff.
[583] It's party time.
[584] Yep.
[585] This is his version of MTV Spring Bridge.
[586] It's just fucking stoked.
[587] During one evening, just months after he started working at the hospital, Donald commits his first murder.
[588] Ladies and gentlemen, please say hello.
[589] Was that death?
[590] I think that was actually the Grim Reaper is here tonight.
[591] The Grim Reaper is like, yes, girl.
[592] Kill them all, bitch.
[593] Slay them, slay them all.
[594] Here's what happens.
[595] And tell me how you'd feel about this.
[596] Okay.
[597] Donald goes into this patient's room to do what to check on him he had had a stroke before goes into this patient fucking rubs feces all over Donald's face.
[598] What?
[599] So don't know.
[600] Okay so I don't like that if that's the question you're about to ask me. He becomes angry, lose it all control.
[601] Later he says the next thing I knew I'd smothered him.
[602] Okay, I'd smothered him.
[603] It was like it was like it was the last straw I just lost it.
[604] I went to help the man and he wants to rub that in my face?
[605] No, he doesn't want to.
[606] Following the murder, so then Harvey, then he cleans up the patient, takes a shower real quick, and then tells the nurses that the guy was dead, and no one ever questioned it, he said.
[607] Just three weeks, so that's his first murder, just three weeks later, he kills again when he disconnected an oxygen tank to an elderly woman's oxygen.
[608] What do they call it?
[609] When no one suspected him, he starts to get more brazen.
[610] He used various techniques to kill.
[611] He used a plastic bag to suffocate patients, morphine, and a variety of other drug overdoses.
[612] In the first year, he kills more than a dozen patients.
[613] Fuck.
[614] Yeah.
[615] Do you want to see a picture of him?
[616] She's asking me. Doesn't he look like a fucking Brady?
[617] Which one?
[618] Mike?
[619] No, the middle one.
[620] Greg.
[621] Peter?
[622] Peter.
[623] He's the Brady they keep in the sub -basement.
[624] Look at how bright and cheery his eyes look it's what is he thinking about feces jesus can you imagine being in a bed in a hospital and then those eyes come into you do you need some juice yeah I'm feeling better you just pop out of bed and whew the fever's broken bye okay god damn okay um a dozen patients in a year okay Around this time, he starts a relationship, so he's gay, he starts a relationship with a man named Vernon Midden.
[625] He is an older man, he's married with children, and he's an undertaker.
[626] Oh my God, check, check, check.
[627] A little bit hacky.
[628] How much older?
[629] I think he was in his 40s.
[630] Oh, okay.
[631] So he tells him about all these, like, different ways to kill people and things that will, like, affect, you know, so he learns a lot from this undertaker.
[632] He also learns about...
[633] You've got to talk about something at Olive Garden, you know?
[634] He also introduces Donald to his favorite pastime, Vernon's favorite pastime, The Occult.
[635] Oh.
[636] You know.
[637] Mine too.
[638] I think we have...
[639] I think we have a picture of the occult right here.
[640] I don't know.
[641] I watched this, like, hokey documentary on YouTube about it, and I had to stop it and take a screen grab of this amazing photo.
[642] Because I was like, either way.
[643] And then there was also, like, it was one of those...
[644] It was one of those documentaries.
[645] documentaries that like they say a line dramatically and then they show like some stock footage of like you know and then they went to the police and you just see like a car like driving that it means to go to the police but then I'm like and he was into the occult and it just shows like a like pentagram with the word occult across the front yeah with like occult and it's like okay and then this that's the occult that came up and so I was like well they need to see this so this is you think it could possibly be the undertaker like on the weekend Uh -huh.
[646] That's what they made it seem like.
[647] This is him just on like a, on the fun, let's all go out.
[648] Hold on, let me put it on my upside -down crucifix.
[649] Yeah.
[650] Real quick.
[651] Or it's a, they wouldn't have a Rocky Horror Picture Show live.
[652] I don't know.
[653] All right.
[654] Well, so, okay.
[655] He gets, so then, oh, he gets a, he gets a spiritual guide when he, he joins the occult as well.
[656] and he gets a spiritual guide named Duncan, who was a doctor in his past life, a ghost, I guess, that would assist him with figuring out who to kill.
[657] What?
[658] She's like, that's not real.
[659] So he joins the occult, T .M. See in a circle.
[660] And immediately is like, I love killing and I kill.
[661] And then they're like, here's great ways to do it.
[662] No, I, it's his, like, ghost guide.
[663] Oh, oh.
[664] You know what I mean?
[665] Okay, it's in his head.
[666] It's in his fucking head.
[667] I'm sorry.
[668] pictured at the occult meeting, sitting in a circle and folding chairs.
[669] Duncan, you've got to meet our friend over here.
[670] Donald?
[671] Does anybody any ideas about new ways to kill?
[672] Yeah.
[673] So he gets, Donald gets caught burglarizing when he's drunk one night, which I'm sure is, like, the worst way to burglarize is when you're drunk.
[674] Yeah.
[675] Into a house?
[676] I think, like, I don't know, into an apartment building.
[677] No, save, drunk burglarizing for just shoplifting at CVS.
[678] Yeah.
[679] That's...
[680] We pick CVS up and then we put them back down.
[681] That's right.
[682] Right in their place.
[683] So he gets caught, you know, he has to leave his job because of it.
[684] It's a story.
[685] And he enlists in the Air Force.
[686] Perfect solution.
[687] The occult Air Force.
[688] Serves less than a year before he's discharged in March of 1972.
[689] After he's released, he has a severe.
[690] bout of depression, which he does throughout his life.
[691] He attempts suicide, and in 1970s, he commits himself to the Mental Ward of the Veterans Administration in Lexington, Kentucky.
[692] You guys are on the Mental Award, too?
[693] Great.
[694] They're on a holiday pass.
[695] While he receives, over the course of a few weeks, received over 21 electric shock therapies.
[696] I really hate those parts of like old mental hospital movies when they're like, they're laid down if someone's holding, oh, that's the worst.
[697] It's the fucking worst.
[698] Let's just think about it first.
[699] After working various jobs where he didn't kill anyone, that's where I summed that up because it was like, he worked all this time and blah, blah, blah, blah, but just he didn't kill anyone at this job.
[700] He moves back to Cincinnati in September, 1975, where he gets a job working the night shift at the Cincinnati VA Medical Hospital.
[701] He works at the, That hospital you're against?
[702] Is it haunted?
[703] Because you know some bad shit's about to go down.
[704] He works as a nursing assistant, housekeeping aid, a cardiac catheterization technician, and autopsy assistant.
[705] Get in there, buddy.
[706] Since he worked at night, he had no supervision.
[707] He had access to all areas of the hospital, which sounds horrible to us.
[708] So if you work in the daytime, you have to have a certain kind of pass.
[709] You have to be a doctor to be on certain wards.
[710] And then after 11, all those rules just go away.
[711] And it's just like, whoever wants to be here gets to be here.
[712] Do your thing.
[713] Free for all.
[714] Yeah.
[715] Over the next 10 years, Donald Harvey murders at least 15 patients while working at the hospital.
[716] Fuck.
[717] He keeps a precise diary of his crimes, takes snitch on each victim, detailing how he murdered them.
[718] He presses plastic bags and a wet towel over.
[719] the mouth and nose.
[720] He sprinkles rat poison in patients' desserts.
[721] He puts arsenic and cyanide into orange juice.
[722] He injects cyanide intravenous tubes.
[723] And all the while, he's studying medical journals for hints on how to kill people and how to conceal his crimes.
[724] And here's how he studies.
[725] Laser eyes burning each page.
[726] But at this point, he doesn't just keep his murdery stuff to his patients.
[727] He, in the early 80s, he moves in with his lover, Carl Howler, and soon, so he finds out Carl's going out on Sundays and, like, hooking up other dudes, and he gets pissed.
[728] So Carl starts getting sick on Sundays and can't go out.
[729] Oh.
[730] Oh, my God.
[731] The old Sunday flu?
[732] Yeah.
[733] After you have your croissant, and then you're like, I feel weird.
[734] Mm -hmm.
[735] Because Donald starts slipping him small doses of arsenic so that he wouldn't be able to leave the apartment.
[736] Then Carl has a female, the boyfriend, Carl has a female BFF, and Donald, of course, is like, she is getting in the way of my relation, you know, the crazies.
[737] The old hag comes in and is like, can I see that croissant, please?
[738] Carl, your boyfriend seems like a psychotic murderer, and the psychotic murder is like, I'm going to kill this bitch.
[739] Right?
[740] So he, okay, this is so fucked up.
[741] He doesn't kill her, but he retaliates the way any sane.
[742] person would by infecting her with hepatitis.
[743] This guy is not chill.
[744] They catch it and treat her.
[745] He also tried to infect her with AIDS, but it didn't work.
[746] Jesus, what are the fucking fuck?
[747] They're just going to the beer bust.
[748] It's not that big of a deal.
[749] Let them party.
[750] Another neighbor who Donald thought was getting in between him and Carl was Helen Metzger.
[751] She's a 63 -year -old woman.
[752] Donald makes her a pie.
[753] laced with arsenic, she dies.
[754] So he's just basically trying to kill everyone all the time.
[755] Okay.
[756] In April 1983, Donald has an argument with Carl's parents, his boyfriend's parents.
[757] They piss him off.
[758] So he starts to poison their food with arsenic.
[759] Carl's father, Henry, suffers a stroke, is taken to the hospital.
[760] Donald visits him, puts arsenic in this pudding, and he dies that fucking night.
[761] Jesus Christ.
[762] Harvey continued to poison Carl mother, Margaret, on and not for the next year, but he didn't kill her.
[763] Then, poor Carl.
[764] Then he accidentally kills Carl's brother -in -law.
[765] What?
[766] Because his name's Howard Vedder.
[767] Donald made him some cocktails using a bottle of vodka that Donald, oops, forgot, had wood alcohol in it.
[768] So he'd been like taking tape off of something, I don't know, in a vodka bottle, and was like, let me mix you up, whatever.
[769] Is he claiming it's truly a mistake?
[770] He says it is, but do we, is this the person we believe?
[771] No. I know.
[772] But he says it like, it was a mistake.
[773] His death is attributed to cardiac failure.
[774] So in January 19, what?
[775] It's just so many people to die around one person.
[776] Even if it was like the best sex of your life, you'd be like, I'm sorry, I have to take a break.
[777] Like, I just have to run the numbers and see.
[778] Yeah.
[779] Since it's just you and I left and I know that I'm not killing every.
[780] Everybody.
[781] It's just a hunch, I should break up with you.
[782] And he's like, every time you pull out your creative cooking with aluminum foil recipe, someone gets sick.
[783] Someone dies.
[784] Um, mm -mm, mm -mm.
[785] Okay.
[786] So in 1984 January, Carl breaks off the relationship and asks him to move out.
[787] Donald's angry, spends the next two years trying to kill Carl.
[788] Jesus.
[789] That he doesn't.
[790] And then on July 18, 1985, security guards, search Donald's gym bag at work, they find a 38 caliber pistol, hypodermic needles, surgical scissors and gloves, a cocaine, spoon, various medical texts, two occult books, and a biography of serial killers, serial killer Charles Sobrage.
[791] He's the bikini killer.
[792] You know him?
[793] No. Of course I had to fucking look him up.
[794] Stay tuned to a future episode of my favorite brother, I just spit on you.
[795] Oh, you're taking the bikini killer.
[796] I wanted him.
[797] So it's basically they open a bag and there's a piece of paper that says, I'm super guilty inside.
[798] All I want to do is continue to kill people.
[799] I just, I can't stop killing.
[800] I'm doing it as we speak.
[801] And I enjoy it.
[802] Come get me. So the hospital's like, look, just if you quietly resign, we won't put a mark on your record.
[803] We won't tell anyone at the place you want to get a job in the future.
[804] We want to be like...
[805] We want you to continue.
[806] And you're doing this.
[807] Just not here.
[808] Wow.
[809] So he quietly resigns rather than being fired.
[810] Nothing about the incident has ever noted his work record, and hospital authorities didn't open an investigation to determine if he had committed any other crimes while working at the hospital.
[811] Oh, it turns out his mom ran that hospital.
[812] So.
[813] Seven months later, in February, 1986, Donald was hired as a nurse's aide at Cincinnati's Drake Memorial Hospital.
[814] From, you guys hate that.
[815] No one gives a shit.
[816] That's where Cincinnati drops out hard.
[817] No way are we supporting Drake.
[818] What about the singer Drake?
[819] It's up to Grassy.
[820] That's the only way I know him.
[821] You can't not know that.
[822] That and then there was an Instagram picture where he piled up money where I was like, that's not that cool.
[823] Don't tell him, I said that.
[824] Please, Stephen.
[825] You know this is his favorite podcast.
[826] Drake is crying at home alone in a bed of money.
[827] I'm trying so hard to get away from DeGrasi.
[828] A thousand dollar bill, $1 ,000 bill.
[829] Ugh, eye infection, eye infection.
[830] No one touches $1 ,000 bills.
[831] Oh, and when you're that rich, it's all brand new money.
[832] It's brand new money.
[833] Sometimes you go down and you exchange it at the mint, just if you feel like it.
[834] Okay.
[835] Good.
[836] Okay.
[837] Da -da -da -da -da -da -bo.
[838] Okay.
[839] From April 1986, until March, 1987, Donald Kills.
[840] six patients.
[841] It's so many.
[842] Uh -huh.
[843] And tries to kill several more by, let me tell you, I'm going to keep name and names.
[844] Please do.
[845] Disconnecting life sport machines, injecting air into veins, which is like the scare.
[846] I hate that one so much.
[847] That's a bad one.
[848] Hoo.
[849] Suffocation and injection of arsenic, cyanide, and petroleum -based cleansers.
[850] Say that one again?
[851] No. Is mace involved?
[852] Based.
[853] Petroleum -based.
[854] cleansers.
[855] I don't know what that is.
[856] Nutrigena?
[857] What's wrong?
[858] I don't know.
[859] I just talked and tasted it.
[860] I don't know what it is.
[861] I didn't look that one up.
[862] Bikini killer?
[863] Yes.
[864] They're like, do not use Noxema.
[865] It will fucking kill your face.
[866] Back to, okay, we're back to the beginning of this awful story of 1987 April.
[867] Donald's like, yeah, I killed that one motorcycle accident victim because I felt bad for him.
[868] That's it.
[869] Bye.
[870] And so that same day, though, he had, but P .S. That same day, he had also killed an 82 -year -old woman, Hilda Lietz, by feeding her detachal.
[871] With detachal?
[872] Detachal.
[873] Dirtchal.
[874] Dersus.
[875] Through her gastric tube and in her orange juice.
[876] So he had killed two fucking people that day.
[877] And he was like, no, I just killed that one guy because I felt bad for him.
[878] Then investigators like, great, we're going to go look through your apartment.
[879] they find like 300 pounds of cyanide and arsenic made that number up but it was a lot they find so jars of because he was just bringing it from home he didn't even need to steal it anymore from the fucking he's got that Tupperware lunchbox it's got all the different little size containers arsenic's in the circular one no that's salad dressing and it's not deadly at all they find that they find books on the occult and poisons a detailed account of the murders love that don't do that dude which he has written in a diary.
[880] So they come back and they're like, look.
[881] Wait, look and listen.
[882] Something's up, bro.
[883] And Ohio has the motherfucking death penalty.
[884] So you better start plea dealing.
[885] And he's like, okay, that's transcript.
[886] On August 11, 1987, Harvey, who's 35, sits down with investigators and confess to committing 33 murders over the 3rd.
[887] past 17 years.
[888] At the days go on, though, that number eventually grows to 70.
[889] What?
[890] He's up in Chickatillo territory.
[891] It's crazy.
[892] He said that the reason he got away with it for 17 years was that the doctors are overworked and sometimes don't even see the patients after they die.
[893] So he's also kind of blaming it on the hospitals for not checking up on him.
[894] It's so weird.
[895] And then you read, there's like a list of every single person he killed, and some of them, or like, he says he's an angel of death and he's trying to help them and, you know, they're sick and dying and he wants to save them.
[896] And some of them, you can see that they were actually sick and dying.
[897] That doesn't mean he was trying to help them.
[898] But some of them, most of them were not.
[899] Yeah.
[900] And he's a monster.
[901] They're like, I just had a nice eye lift.
[902] I was going to go live my life.
[903] Yeah, totally.
[904] Although one of his ex -boyfriends had said to him, when I'm, if I get sick and I'm dying, put me out of my misery.
[905] He's like, on it.
[906] Yeah.
[907] I already am.
[908] You've come to the, and you want, like, your loved one to argue, no, I would never, you know, but he's like, great, I'll do it.
[909] You're like, oh, shit.
[910] Do you want error in your tube?
[911] Do you want really rotten tea?
[912] By 1998, he had been convicted of 28 counts of murder and seven counts of attempted murder, total eventually that he would convict it was 36 murders, 35 men, 11 women, ranging in age from 42 to 91.
[913] Plus one conviction for intentional manslaughter.
[914] He claimed to have killed 87 people, and there's probably a lot that we'll never know, obviously.
[915] So, up until he was serving, he got four life sentences.
[916] Just four?
[917] Uh -huh.
[918] He's serving them, what's up?
[919] Then, back in March of this year, he's still alive?
[920] Uh -huh.
[921] That was like in the 90s, 898.
[922] Back in March of 2017, a couple.
[923] What's up?
[924] Yeah.
[925] He's 64 years old.
[926] He's found beaten in his cell at Toledo Collection Institute in Toledo, Ohio.
[927] Shit, Toledo.
[928] And he dies from his injuries two days later.
[929] Wow.
[930] No assailant is ever identified.
[931] And that is your fucking, what's it called, Angel of Death, Donald Harvey.
[932] When they interview those, when they interview the prisoners that beat him to death, they were like, no, no, we were just putting him out of his misery.
[933] He was very sickly.
[934] It's really weird, because in the documentary I did watch, like, he willingly, he's just clearly so, I don't know, he's so weird, he, like, is interviewed for this documentary, and he's like, yeah, I'll tell you everything.
[935] Like, he really wants the attention.
[936] And he kept throughout, every time he'd get in trouble in the past, he'd be like, yeah, I killed a bunch of people.
[937] And he was, like, he wanted to tell people, and he wanted attention for it so badly.
[938] And he was like, I made this big mistake.
[939] If I hadn't done this thing, it'd have been fine.
[940] He's just, like, so weirdly lighthearted about it.
[941] It's creepy as fuck.
[942] It's crazy.
[943] And it looks like a Brady the whole time.
[944] Wow, that was amazing.
[945] Right.
[946] Fuck.
[947] Wow.
[948] Thank you.
[949] I'm going to do the Circleville Letter Writer.
[950] One with the...
[951] You know what?
[952] You should tell it to me. Okay.
[953] You guess it for as long as you can.
[954] Okay.
[955] I'm always at the Circleville Letter Writer?
[956] Yes.
[957] Oh, my God.
[958] I know that one.
[959] No, I don't.
[960] Oh, my God, oh, my God.
[961] Okay.
[962] Here's the best part about this is when...
[963] So, I thought for one day that I was going to do the horrible murder of Dimebag Daryl from Pantera and Damage Plan.
[964] And when I started reading this fucking story, it was so awful.
[965] And then I emailed my friend Brian Possein, who's a stand -up comic, hilarious stand -up comic.
[966] Does he friends with them?
[967] Huge metal fan.
[968] no, but he's a, he, I've known him since I was 20, and he's the hugest, like, metal fan in the world.
[969] So I was like, hey, got me any, you know, insider tips on Dimebag Daryl's death before I knew anything about it.
[970] And he wrote me back one of the saddest emails that I've ever read where he was just like, it was so fucked, it affected the metal community so badly, all of my friends that are in metal bands, think about it before, every time they go on stage.
[971] It, like, we always do a cheers to him once a year on the anniversary of his death and I was like lightly crying in my hotel room like I have to change my murder and he's like but thanks for bringing that up yeah exactly but it was also very sweet because he was like I was like thank you for that insight information he's like I just want regular people to know that like metal fans aren't gross and we really have feelings and care it was the sweetest and yet saddest thing in the world, I know, I love it.
[972] So the Circleville letter writer, so fascinating, and luckily and amazingly, there is a Dennis Farina hosted unsolved mysteries about it.
[973] And it's the first one on that episode, so you know it's a good story.
[974] I don't think I know it then, because I think the one I was thinking is newer.
[975] Okay.
[976] So let's do this.
[977] Okay, let's do this thing.
[978] So, but the way I found it was then I had to go after I abandoned the Pantera murder.
[979] That's the, see, that's inaccurate.
[980] He was in damage plan.
[981] Do you see how much I could fuck that up?
[982] I went online and they actually found an article that entitled The Mysterious and Unsolved Five Columbus Mysteries Worthy of a podcast.
[983] Oh!
[984] Shit!
[985] You couldn't have sent that my way?
[986] I know.
[987] No, I took them all to myself.
[988] You're doing them all right now.
[989] I'm mine.
[990] It was written by a guy named Zoe Miller in his bio.
[991] Do you know that guy?
[992] it's a great it's a great article please tell him I liked it oh can I give a shout out really quickly to my article yes yes yes yes no it's okay get in there Stephen can you cut this and paste it up top I'm really excited to tell you guys about this I found a lot of information from murderpedia of course but from the article from serial killer calendar .com so thanks guys serial killer calendar I wonder if I do a serial killer a day I don't know that'd be cool okay now we're back in Okay, Stephen, right here.
[993] Zoe Miller, on his bio, on this, the Columbus Navigator website, who he wrote this article for, he said, in his bio, he says that he struggles daily with his addiction to cats.
[994] I thought you'd like to know that.
[995] Yeah.
[996] Oh, man. But most of the information that we're about to hear came from a local journalist named Martin Yant, who reported on this story.
[997] The Yants are in the back row.
[998] What up?
[999] He did all the work and was kind of there for this whole story, and he's also live in the Unsolved Mysteries.
[1000] So it's very cool.
[1001] So you can see him as talking head when you look up that episode.
[1002] Okay, so Circleville, Ohio, is a small city, 25 miles south of here.
[1003] Thank you.
[1004] The population is around, well, I got on the Circleville Pumpkin Show website.
[1005] Truly, one of the most beautiful, informative websites I've ever seen.
[1006] No joke.
[1007] So every year they have the Circleville Pumpkin Show.
[1008] Oh.
[1009] So on the Circleville Pumpkin Show website, it says the population of Circleville is around 12 ,000.
[1010] Other websites said 14.
[1011] If Circleville says 12, it's fucking 12.
[1012] So every year, the third Wednesday through Sunday in October, they have the Circleville Pumpkin Show.
[1013] Oh, my God.
[1014] Yes.
[1015] Cheers for it every time.
[1016] This year, it's from October 17th to the 20th.
[1017] So, as of today, 256 days to the fucking on the website.
[1018] Love it.
[1019] Fucking love it.
[1020] It's just beautifully designed website.
[1021] Everything's in a little square.
[1022] So easy to navigate.
[1023] The fall festival has 100 ,000 visitors a day.
[1024] I want all the snacks.
[1025] What do you think they have?
[1026] Okay, well, I'll tell you, there's pictures on the fucking website.
[1027] Of course they have corn dogs Is there pumpkin -flavored food?
[1028] Yes, that's the whole time's 500.
[1029] They have pumpkin thuck and arts and crafts.
[1030] There's a really cute picture.
[1031] Somebody, remember those weird collages you made like in kindergarten where it was like little piece of paper in different colors and you would glue it to a thing because you were so young that was how you made art?
[1032] So it was like your teacher made the pumpkin and then you were just like pieces of paper with glue.
[1033] They have like a wall of those on the website.
[1034] It's all made by adults.
[1035] The kids, those are arts and crafts for drunk adults.
[1036] Would that be a great idea?
[1037] It would be so good.
[1038] Everyone has glue on their face.
[1039] There's rides.
[1040] Cool.
[1041] Full -on rides.
[1042] Cool.
[1043] There's, as I said, arts and crafts displays.
[1044] And then, of course, one lucky young lady will be named Miss Pumpkin Show 2018.
[1045] Which, if that is a beauty contest where you're the most beautiful, if you're the most shaped like a pumpkin.
[1046] I won it already.
[1047] I already.
[1048] I'm in it.
[1049] And if you have like kind of widely spaced teeth, I'm in.
[1050] Fucking I am Miss Pumpkin show every day.
[1051] And on top of everything, there's a fucking giant pumpkin contest.
[1052] Am I right?
[1053] Oh my God.
[1054] On the center, you have Cecil Weston.
[1055] He's the champion.
[1056] That fucking pumpkin weighed 1 ,701 pounds.
[1057] Oh my God.
[1058] Seesle nailed that shit.
[1059] What do you think he was putting in the ground.
[1060] But then, second place, that's Bella Liggett.
[1061] Bella.
[1062] Hers, she was only 200 pounds behind with a 1 ,562 pound.
[1063] Pumpkin, and of course over there, you know Mark Hoff Heinz.
[1064] His pumpkin was 1 ,155 .5 pounds.
[1065] Oh shit.
[1066] Yeah.
[1067] You got to love the fucking lady who breaks into the pumpkin business.
[1068] Oh, you know.
[1069] Everyone knows what a fucking masculine, thing it is.
[1070] It's the pumpkin show business.
[1071] It's very toxic.
[1072] And Bella's like, fuck it, this is my dream.
[1073] You can't keep me down.
[1074] My pumpkin is humongous.
[1075] And none of you can change it.
[1076] It's just a fact.
[1077] You cannot shame me out of this contest.
[1078] No. And then it turned out that...
[1079] Oh my God, was there a scandal?
[1080] Yeah, she tried to she tried to hit Cecil in the knees.
[1081] No, I'm just kidding.
[1082] she fucking Tanya Harding Cecil right before and then someone's like Bella it's the pumpkins that get weighed it's not about it's not about his skating wow that was a roller coaster fuck they have roller coasters they have roller coasters and the zipper and it's right there on the street it's just crazy so you could like live here and then there's just like a fucking Ferris reel in your front yard did you just say Ferris reel?
[1083] A fair is real.
[1084] My dentures are just kicking in right now.
[1085] So Circleville is famous for the Pumpkin Show.
[1086] I love that they call it a show and not a contest or a festival.
[1087] Hey, I'm sorry, I'm a control of it.
[1088] I don't know.
[1089] Get out.
[1090] Get out of my slideshow.
[1091] No, it's okay.
[1092] Everything.
[1093] What didn't you like about the pumpkin still being there?
[1094] I wanted to look at it.
[1095] Oh.
[1096] You're trying to keep yourself.
[1097] I don't even know what you said after.
[1098] Okay.
[1099] Let's just look at them one last time.
[1100] Sponsored by like the people that grow fake foods.
[1101] Oh, that's a huge accusation, Karen.
[1102] Are you, okay.
[1103] What?
[1104] You're talking about, uh, what's, what is it called when they take steroids?
[1105] Yeah, like, uh, when foods take steroids?
[1106] No, when people take steroids.
[1107] You just said it.
[1108] What?
[1109] Jucing scandal?
[1110] What?
[1111] Juicing.
[1112] Thank you.
[1113] We look over and it's this woman of the huge muscles in the front.
[1114] I know the answer.
[1115] It's called juicing.
[1116] Piyo, pio!
[1117] Gun show, gun show.
[1118] Do you like that I screamed what into a crowd?
[1119] That's what happened last night.
[1120] Last night in Cleveland, we started talking about one city that we're afraid to say because we're going to mispronounce it, and the entire audience just immediately started yelling out names of cities they thought we couldn't pronounce.
[1121] It was the weirdest thing, and so fucking hilarious.
[1122] We're like, first of all, we can't understand what anyone is saying.
[1123] And then one girl raised her hand.
[1124] Real polite.
[1125] And said Coyahoga, which was like, fuck you, I gotta say that.
[1126] It was, it was chili coffee.
[1127] Yeah.
[1128] What are they?
[1129] Who spelled that initially?
[1130] The fuck.
[1131] Okay.
[1132] I was going to call it Chillicote.
[1133] Luckily I didn't.
[1134] So, Circleville is famous for its pumpkins.
[1135] I refuse Look at them No Look at them They are larger than anything You've ever seen I guess because I was raised Because I did 4H as a child And then we would go to the fair Right Then you go to the fair Every summer you go to the county fair We'd live at the fair for a week And you fucking walk around As like well because it was the 70s So you'd be like a 7 year old walking around the fair alone Like oh look a pumpkin display I guess I'll look at this for a half an hour Whomie?
[1136] Where's my mother?
[1137] Just not around.
[1138] Back of the RV.
[1139] She said, please don't bother her until dusk.
[1140] Again, pumpkin show .com for any of your pumpkin needs.
[1141] So Circleville is famous for the pumpkin show, but it's also famous for one of the weirdest unsolved mysteries on the globe.
[1142] I put that.
[1143] I don't know if it's true.
[1144] Well, I guess you got to decide.
[1145] If it's true to you or not.
[1146] I get to decide in this moment.
[1147] Wait.
[1148] Second only to crop circles.
[1149] Yep.
[1150] I haven't solved those yet.
[1151] No. It's the, okay, so this is so amazing.
[1152] So in 1977, why did I skip to this next page?
[1153] And there's so much information on this one.
[1154] Oh, I put, I put, parentheses, Paul Winfield.
[1155] In this sleepy burgo.
[1156] Circleville, Ohio.
[1157] In the sleepy.
[1158] Citizens begin getting letters in the middle.
[1159] mail.
[1160] All the letters are written in block print.
[1161] They all are from an anonymous source.
[1162] There's no return address on any of them.
[1163] They all have the postmark from Columbus, or most of them do later on.
[1164] That changes a little bit.
[1165] And they all contain personal information about the recipient, sometimes that only the recipient knows.
[1166] So Mary Gillespie, as you remember, is a citizen, a school bus driver, a wife, a mother of two.
[1167] And she receives, some places say it's the first letter, but it sounds like they all went out at the same time.
[1168] And people reading these letters got so weirded out and sometimes scared, they weren't saying anything.
[1169] Because basically, and I think what's to me amazing about this story is it's kind of like people using gossip as the ultimate weapon.
[1170] You know what I mean?
[1171] It's the thing that you fear, like what do you fear most?
[1172] God bless you.
[1173] What do you fear?
[1174] Mine is the plague.
[1175] I fear that the most.
[1176] Yeah, but that guy was covered.
[1177] That sounds like he used his whole arm and his leg to cover.
[1178] We really appreciate that, sir.
[1179] Thank you, sir.
[1180] Or ma 'am, if you're very sick.
[1181] She could be very sick.
[1182] I kept thinking about it as I was writing this up of like, what would you, if you opened a letter that said, I know that you, blankety, blank, blank, blank, whatever, and you're reading it in block, weird block handwriting just starting to sweat and you just fold it up and put it away like okay let's see where this goes like that's what was happening in the town of Circleville a town of 1 ,200 people at the time 11 ,000 11 ,000 people but still tiny right everybody knows everybody's business everybody knows each other so it's such a like it's such a like live live ammo thing that's happening so threatening too it's because like I don't just know this I'm like letting you know, but I know.
[1183] And I want to do something about it.
[1184] Uh -huh.
[1185] So that's part of it.
[1186] So she gets her letter, and inside it says, so it's in block writing, and I have it here.
[1187] It says, stay away from Massey.
[1188] Don't lie one question about knowing him.
[1189] I know where you live.
[1190] I've been observing your house and know you have children.
[1191] This is no joke.
[1192] Please take it serious, bad gritty.
[1193] Am I?
[1194] Everyone concerned has been notified and everything will be over soon.
[1195] Horrifying.
[1196] Terrifying.
[1197] So scary.
[1198] Scared.
[1199] Tell me your worst secret right now.
[1200] I don't have any.
[1201] You know I don't have any.
[1202] Really?
[1203] Because here's your letter.
[1204] Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no. So the Massey that is being spoken of at the top of this is the superintendent of schools.
[1205] Massey Renee, I don't know his first name.
[1206] It's Superintendent of Schools So it's a good thing you went to that business.
[1207] It's all one, Superintendent of Schools, it's an Icelandic name.
[1208] Massey.
[1209] I couldn't find, it's kind of I actually, it made me kind of happy because I couldn't find pictures of Mary Gillespie, I couldn't find pictures of the Superintendent of Schools Massey, but I did find this I swear to God this is a real book cover on Amazon Oh my God This guy, Merrill Massey, wrote a book entitled So You Want to be Super Intentate.
[1210] Oh my God!
[1211] Why don't we all have books If it's this easy?
[1212] We can.
[1213] If you know Photoshop, you can.
[1214] Oh, my God.
[1215] I'm not saying Merrill had anything to do with this.
[1216] We don't know.
[1217] Merle?
[1218] Merrill.
[1219] Merle Right?
[1220] Who knows?
[1221] Let's ask him.
[1222] Come on out.
[1223] He's up in the balcony, red cheeks.
[1224] Oh, shit.
[1225] Not this again.
[1226] Keep sneezing into his arm.
[1227] He's allergic to secrets.
[1228] Okay.
[1229] So, of course, she's nervous about the letter, but she doesn't say anything.
[1230] She just puts it away.
[1231] And then she gets another one.
[1232] And she's just, like, trying to handle it, trying to be calm.
[1233] So then the next letter that the family receives goes to her husband Ron.
[1234] And it's the same block lettering, same basic info.
[1235] And I'm not sure if it's because it's such a small town.
[1236] But in that first letter on the envelope, it just said Mary Gillespie, RT, Circlesville, Circleville, Ohio.
[1237] Because you can just be like, no address, no zip code.
[1238] With the male man's like, yeah, I know who that is.
[1239] We know her, yeah.
[1240] She lives over there.
[1241] Yeah.
[1242] Which is great for secrets.
[1243] You know what I mean?
[1244] So his letter is exactly the same.
[1245] And he based, and his, the first letter basically says, put an end to your wife's affair or die.
[1246] So it's like directly threatening his life.
[1247] Oh, my God.
[1248] So he confronts Mary, and then she shows him her letters.
[1249] She says, she swears there's no affair happening.
[1250] Mm -hmm.
[1251] So they try to go, okay, well, something's weird happening, but let's just deal with it and go on with their lives.
[1252] Then Ron gets a second letter, and it says, I'm not sure if I have this one or not, it says, Gillespie, you have had two weeks and done nothing.
[1253] Admit the truth and inform a school board.
[1254] If not, I will broadcast it on CBs, on posters, signs, and billboards until the truth comes out.
[1255] Oh, Stephen.
[1256] There are some people who thought, because of the block lettering, that he said, I will broadcast it on CBS.
[1257] But there is no way for a letter writer from Circleville, Ohio, to get this information onto the network in 1977.
[1258] They were much more of a, you know, all -in -the -family type of situation.
[1259] So they believe that the writer meant C -Benzuela.
[1260] bees.
[1261] Okay, anyway.
[1262] So Ron and Mary are fucking panicking, right?
[1263] This is getting very serious.
[1264] So they invite Ron's sister and her husband, Paul for a shower, to come over and they show them the letters and they try to make a plan.
[1265] They think they know who sent the letters.
[1266] And so what they decide to do is we should, you know, the Gillespie should send a threatening letter back to that person.
[1267] Uh -huh.
[1268] Mm -mm -mm.
[1269] Oh, yeah?
[1270] That's right.
[1271] Pumpkin justice.
[1272] Get ready for it.
[1273] Well, it seems like it works because everything goes quiet for a couple weeks.
[1274] And then, on the night of August 19, 1977, the phone rings at the Gillespie's house, and Ron answers, and he gets into a fight with someone on the phone.
[1275] So Mary doesn't know exactly what happened because she didn't hear anything exactly, but he basically slammed down the phone and rushed out of the house, grabbed his handgun on the way, got into his truck.
[1276] and raced off, and almost immediately, like, moments away from their house, ran into a tree and was killed.
[1277] Yeah.
[1278] So, when the sheriff inspects the scene, they find the handgun that he brought with him.
[1279] And some articles, they argue this point, but some say that between the house and that car accident that was moments later, the handgun was fired once.
[1280] But nobody heard the gunshots.
[1281] There was no proof that the bullet, landed anywhere that anyone could find and there's some articles that say there's no way to prove that that handgun didn't get fired sometime before.
[1282] But at first that's what they thought.
[1283] So the sheriff inspects the scene and he declares that it is a foul, that the foul play is probably involved from what they're looking at.
[1284] But then he, the sheriff suddenly changes his stance and says that Ron's blood alcohol level was twice the legal limit, 0 .16.
[1285] Therefore it was an accidental death that basically he caused himself.
[1286] But the family and friends of Ron Gillespie are just like he didn't drink.
[1287] He was not a big drinker.
[1288] And he wasn't drunk.
[1289] Like the kids are saying they remember him leaving the house.
[1290] He was not drunk.
[1291] So that him having a really high blood alcohol level makes absolutely no sense at all.
[1292] But that's what the official report is.
[1293] And so therefore the case is closed.
[1294] It's an accidental death move on.
[1295] So the now that Circleville writer does not like letter writer doesn't like this and so a bunch of letters get sent out saying that this the sheriff accusing the sheriff of a cover -up saying don't allow this to happen and basically saying don't fall for this this is a cover -up and Mary continues to get letters threatening her about the affair until she finally breaks down and admits that yes she actually was having an affair with the superintendent of schools but she says that the affair after the letters came.
[1296] Mm -hmm.
[1297] It just...
[1298] She just threw her into his arms.
[1299] Yeah.
[1300] She was so upset about it.
[1301] The stress of being accused of this insane thing made me do it.
[1302] It made me go from being totally innocent of that thing to actually just doing the thing.
[1303] You know how letters are.
[1304] Making you do shit.
[1305] But she was in this horrible position, right?
[1306] because it's this tiny town.
[1307] Everyone's already talking shit about her because she's the woman who's having the affair and that's with all the...
[1308] Everybody knows what's in that letter at this point.
[1309] Then her husband is killed in this very suspicious car accident.
[1310] Suddenly he's a drunk, he was drunk driving.
[1311] Like she is, you know, in the eye of the storm here.
[1312] So I'm sure she was just trying to like make her life make sense a little bit and be like, fine.
[1313] But I mean, she's, you know, it would have been a horrible position.
[1314] But she goes back to work, she's driving the bus again.
[1315] And one day in 1980, And the letters keep coming.
[1316] The letters don't stop.
[1317] To her and people all around, the area, the region.
[1318] So one day, as she's driving her school bus route, signs start popping up along the street.
[1319] And one of them, this is Stephen's pull from the Unsolved Mysteries episode that, I don't know if you can see it.
[1320] Tracy Gillespie sucks.
[1321] Tracy Gillespie sucks.
[1322] Whoa, oh.
[1323] It was Bart Simpson.
[1324] Now, in all the things that I read, the sign that was put up was very threatening about Tracy.
[1325] Some say lewd, some say threatening.
[1326] Tracy Gillespie sucks is not that big of a deal.
[1327] So I think that the producers were like, let's not write anything bad about Tracy Gillespie anymore.
[1328] So this was their way of sugar -coating it.
[1329] Because I would laugh my ass off if I drove by a sign that's amazing.
[1330] I would have loved my name on a sign in any way.
[1331] Karen Kilgareps sucks.
[1332] Yeah, they're talking about me. But of course, Mary sees this.
[1333] It's like her family once again in, you know, getting in the line.
[1334] I'm like, she pulls the school bus over.
[1335] She walks over and she starts ripping down the sign.
[1336] Oh, girl, can you imagine?
[1337] Well, as she's ripping down the sign, she sees there's a string at touch.
[1338] to the sign and she follows the string back behind a couple leads.
[1339] No, she does.
[1340] You can say know all you want.
[1341] It's still happening.
[1342] And hidden is there's this box.
[1343] She fucking yanks the box down.
[1344] What is this?
[1345] Goonies?
[1346] What is this?
[1347] Goonies?
[1348] And inside there's treasure.
[1349] There's a booby trap.
[1350] The end.
[1351] It is a booby trap.
[1352] She pulls the box down.
[1353] She takes it home.
[1354] In the Unsolved Mysteries thing, they made it hurt.
[1355] They showed the She did it right there on the school bus, which she, in truth, did not do.
[1356] She drove home with it.
[1357] And at this point, the police had already shown her how to deal with evidence and how to, like, you know, treat it and touch it and bring it to them.
[1358] And she's just like, what the fuck is this box?
[1359] Let me put my fingerprints all over this.
[1360] Damn it.
[1361] So she gets home, opens the box, there's a gun pointing at her.
[1362] So this was a booby trap.
[1363] When she went to pull the sign down, she was supposed to yank it in a way that would just shoot her as she was standing there, but the gun didn't go off.
[1364] So she gives all of it to the cops and the serial number on the gun is rubbed off but they're like, we can, our people can look at this and figure out what the serial number is.
[1365] Mary's like, great.
[1366] I don't know if that happened.
[1367] I lost my place on the page.
[1368] So basically when they get the results back, everyone shocked because the gun belongs, do her brother -in -law, Paul Fresh Hour.
[1369] Now, when I say Fresh Hour, you're going to think of soap.
[1370] You're going to think of...
[1371] But actually...
[1372] He is...
[1373] He is a man who has an airtight alibi about the day that this booby -trapped sign went up.
[1374] But it was his gun.
[1375] And he said it went missing long ago.
[1376] He hadn't known about it.
[1377] hadn't seen it in a really long time.
[1378] The old missing gun fucking thing.
[1379] You know that thing where you buy a gun and then it just slips your mind?
[1380] And it goes missing.
[1381] But you don't report it.
[1382] I don't know.
[1383] I think I threw it under my pillow.
[1384] So what the police do is this sweet -ass early 80s police work.
[1385] They have him.
[1386] They say, can you copy this letter?
[1387] Can you write the way this circle?
[1388] letter writer writes.
[1389] And he was like, well, I can sure give it a shot, officer, and fucking copies out one of the letters samples that they have there.
[1390] And then...
[1391] Why would you do that?
[1392] Why would you do that?
[1393] I mean, okay.
[1394] Because you're just like, okay.
[1395] Because he basically went in and was like, I've got an airtight alibi, and I didn't do it, so I'm here to tell you what you need to know.
[1396] He does the thing.
[1397] They're like, well, this is amazing, because you've got the same penmanship as the Circleville letter writer, so you're under arrest.
[1398] Oh, God, this table's going to fucking write.
[1399] They told him to copy it, though.
[1400] Yeah, but...
[1401] Maybe he's a really good copier.
[1402] He's a really good copier of the most insane block letters in the world.
[1403] Let's see.
[1404] By, yeah.
[1405] I mean, oh, wait, sorry.
[1406] This is one of the only letters where the writing looks like this, which is super nuts.
[1407] And there are some theories that there's more...
[1408] Do you want to be a superintendent?
[1409] How many people in here have already Amazon bought this book?
[1410] people are just like way down low I've got to get it before it sells out follow your dreams follow your dreams right now oh fresh hour my gun disappeared maybe it's in my mustache that's Stephen when he lets himself go at age 65 sorry Stephen I'm sorry you're going to be so mad Here's the Okay That's really what most of them look like Freezy ass Zodiac style block letters These sickos will pay But also, oh, don't read that one But we'll go back a little bit Should we go back to pumpkins?
[1411] Where are we going?
[1412] Huh?
[1413] Just go to pumpkins But I just wanted you to see where it's basically a lot of people think the way it's written It's somebody trying to cover up So nobody recognizes their handwriting, obviously.
[1414] Okay, so on October 24th, 1983, Paul Freshower stands trial, and in court a handwriting expert testifies that the handwriting in Paul's station house copied letter matches the handwriting in all the circle of the letters, and he has found guilty of attempted murder, and the judge hands down the maximum sentence of seven to 25 years for attempted murder.
[1415] I wouldn't clap.
[1416] Because even while Paul Fresh Hour is in prison, the letters keep coming.
[1417] And they're sent to people, they're sent to hundreds of people, they're sent to, sometimes they contain lewd pictures, sometimes they're very directly threatening, really angry, really mean, and sometimes they're typed even.
[1418] What?
[1419] Hmm.
[1420] Oh.
[1421] Sorry.
[1422] What?
[1423] And so the prison authorities can't figure it.
[1424] out, since they think Paul Freshower is the Circleville letter writer, they're like, every time he has a visitor, they strip search him before he goes into the room, and then after he comes out, they never find anything.
[1425] And also, they don't understand how he's getting, they're still almost always postmarked from Columbus, but the prison he's in was in a different city.
[1426] So he'd have to be giving them to somebody who would take them to Columbus to send him.
[1427] Also, the typewriting thing.
[1428] I can't imagine there's a ton of typewriters in prison.
[1429] He's got one hidden behind a poster of a 40s actress.
[1430] Okay.
[1431] So then he receives, Paul receives his own Circleville letter, writer, letter in jail.
[1432] And it says, all caps, now when are you going to believe you aren't going to get out of there?
[1433] I told you two years ago, when we set them up, they stay set up.
[1434] Don't you listen at all?
[1435] I don't buy it.
[1436] You don't?
[1437] From what I remember that night, I didn't buy it then either.
[1438] Paul Fresh Hour ends up serving 10 years in prison for attempted murder.
[1439] He's released in May of 1994.
[1440] Oh, we can take a look at his face.
[1441] Stephen!
[1442] And by then, reports of threatening letters have basically stopped in Circleville.
[1443] And Paul maintains his innocence until his death in 2012.
[1444] So six months after his release from prison, Unsolved Mysteries, hosted by Dennis Farina, the new ones, they decide to do a story on the Circleville letter writer, and then a couple days after it airs, they get a letter from the Circleville letter writer.
[1445] That's right, it's this one, and it says, forget Circleville, Ohio.
[1446] If you come to Ohio, you ill sickos will pay.
[1447] Signed the Circleville letter writer.
[1448] Was this when he was, when Fresh Hour was dead already?
[1449] No. This was in 1994 or 5, essentially.
[1450] What I like and what I find interesting is that the Circleville letter writer uses colones for periods.
[1451] And in my mind, I picture them in doing this crazy rage writing.
[1452] And at the end of every sentence, they're like, that and done!
[1453] Like, one period isn't enough for the Circleville letter writer.
[1454] No, yeah.
[1455] Done!
[1456] You just have to find the person.
[1457] who screams the last word of every sentience.
[1458] Yes.
[1459] And then you found him.
[1460] Yeah, that's right.
[1461] Who's that loud lady at the grocery store?
[1462] And what's awesome is the introduction Dennis Frina does at the beginning of that episode of Unself Mysteries.
[1463] He's like, we got our own letter, too, but we're not going to be scared off a circus.
[1464] Okay.
[1465] I mean, loving him.
[1466] Loving him actively.
[1467] So, at the end of that episode, Paul Fresh Hour actually says that he just wants justice for his family, even though the Gilles aren't his family anymore, they'd been divorced, and he'd been remarried, he has his own new family, he still wants them to reopen the case of Ron Gillespie's car accident, and he wants to find out what really happened, which is a really beautiful thing at the end of that.
[1468] It's not like he's all bitter and pissed, or he's, if he is, he saved it for off -camera.
[1469] So over roughly a 20 -year span, the Circle of a Letter writer wrote and sent over 1 ,000 letters to the people in and around circles.
[1470] Jesus, get a hobby.
[1471] Well, I guess that is a hobby.
[1472] It's a lot of stamp money.
[1473] What's interesting is the penmanship never improves.
[1474] Okay, so the epilogue to this, which I think is fascinating, so local journalist Martin Yant, who reported on this the whole time, he went and looked into the case, he went and looked in the sheriff's files and found that there was evidence there that was never introduced in court.
[1475] And it's this story that the other bus driver who had this shift I guess before Mary's on that school bus route told her that she had driven the route 20 minutes before Mary had when she saw the sign about Tracy Gillespie and the sign when she drove by that same spot there was no sign but there was a large Sandy haired man who had a orangeish yellow El Camino who when the bus went by he turned away and pretended to be peeing and she thinks so that they couldn't identify him and Martin Aunt says that if the sheriff had looked into that if they had followed up they would have found out that one of their possible suspects in the case had a brother who had a yellowish orange El Camino oh shit and love to pee in bushes that's right and so that is the as yet unsolved case of the Circleville letter writer Thank you for That was amazing Oh no Sorry, look at that gorgeous tent What did you press?
[1476] Sorry What did you hit?
[1477] The tech guy's pissed He's like, look I went to see the Aurora Gorialis It's none of your business Well, the show's over, I guess Oh shit We blew up the projector Oh no Damn.
[1478] I think we have time.
[1479] Yeah, we have time for a hometown murder.
[1480] No pointing yet.
[1481] Yeah, save it.
[1482] Karen has to tell you some stuff.
[1483] This is important.
[1484] These rules.
[1485] These are for you.
[1486] And us.
[1487] And us, mostly.
[1488] Mostly us.
[1489] Okay.
[1490] You know the ones like you can't read it and you can't be so drunk, you can't tell it, and it needs to be local.
[1491] We don't want to hear about shit that happened in Tennessee.
[1492] To Ohio would be great.
[1493] Right.
[1494] Yeah, yeah.
[1495] State statewide.
[1496] Um, and...
[1497] Everyone hates you.
[1498] Okay, you have to remember that if you get picked, everyone else in the room hates you.
[1499] So don't fucking...
[1500] That's not the time to shout out all your cousins and stuff.
[1501] Like, just get up here and tell your story like you are on a clock because you are.
[1502] Ready, go!
[1503] Okay, I'm picking, I'm picking, I'm picking.
[1504] She looks mad at you.
[1505] You hear in the leather, yeah, or whatever that jacket is.
[1506] Yes.
[1507] Go to this way to Vince.
[1508] All right.
[1509] Okay, you can turn the lights down.
[1510] Yeah, turn those lights down, please.
[1511] She'll freak out.
[1512] Hi, my name's Lauren.
[1513] Hi, come over here.
[1514] Can I say that I bought this bow tie specifically for the show?
[1515] Yes, because it's from the shine.
[1516] Can I tell you a secret?
[1517] Or it's not.
[1518] It's an open secret.
[1519] But this is the pattern on the back of my album cover.
[1520] Oh, that's right.
[1521] Hi.
[1522] Hi five, everybody.
[1523] Sorry, that was about me. Where are you from?
[1524] I'm from Cincinnati, born and raised.
[1525] I love Cincinnati.
[1526] But now living here in Columbus.
[1527] Oh, okay.
[1528] A little for everyone.
[1529] What's your hometown?
[1530] Okay, so this is the story of my biological father being the prime suspect and the murder of his best friend in college.
[1531] Okay.
[1532] And just for a little bit of side note, this was like two years after I was born, so life shit one right after the other happened after him.
[1533] But, okay, so this was like 96, 97 happened at Capitol University.
[1534] go accused yeah okay so my bio dad his best friend was Tony who was the only other man in the art therapy department at the time so obviously they're going to have to bond together because they're the only two men in that department yeah okay so he was the last person to see him alive and so like he's dropping him off at his apartment at like one in the morning because you do weird shit at like one in the morning I think he said they were getting haircuts or whatever.
[1535] You know.
[1536] Late night super cuts?
[1537] Who the fuck knows?
[1538] Who the fuck knows is right?
[1539] Anyway, so he drops them off, and then his best friend is proceeded to be carjacked and, like, forced to empty out his entire ATM by a group of three minors, by the way, who apparently each had a wraps sheet, like a whole page long each.
[1540] Anyway, so then they, like, shoot him execution style in the back of the head, and then find his car three days later on, like, Cleveland Avenue, which honestly is no surprise.
[1541] It's like a sketchy air.
[1542] Oh, okay.
[1543] You guys hate Cleveland.
[1544] And not anywhere near Capitol University at all.
[1545] So, but, like, so while they're investigating this, my bio -dad is put through all this bullshit.
[1546] so like when they come to question him they take him out of his ceramics class and if you work with ceramics you know that you're gonna wear the like worst clothing possible so they put him in handcuffs and put him in the back of the squad car and take him to like to interview him and whatever and so like he's looking hella guilty and like they fingerprint him and everything overalls in that day they were working with red clay which is very unfortunate but so like They don't let him wash his hands and, like, drop them back off at class.
[1547] And so, like, his next class, the teacher asks him to hand out all the graded tests.
[1548] So each one has, like, just a little thumbprint on the corner.
[1549] And, like, so now he's looking he's looking he'll be.
[1550] And, like, at one point, he's, like, rounding a corner, and he hears the, like, principal of, like, the college or whatever talking shit about him.
[1551] And, like, it's bad because, like, he's also, like, the son of a Lutheran minister.
[1552] is a Jesuit college.
[1553] Oh, perfect revenge.
[1554] Yeah, exactly.
[1555] But, like, he clearly didn't do it, is what I'm saying.
[1556] And, like...
[1557] He clearly did do it, is what you're saying.
[1558] That's what you just said.
[1559] But, like, I'm pretty sure the kids that did it are now out of prison because they were minors at the time that they did it.
[1560] Do you know how young?
[1561] I don't know.
[1562] Teenagers, for sure.
[1563] Shit.
[1564] Wow.
[1565] How did they get caught?
[1566] I think they just followed the evidence.
[1567] I don't get it.
[1568] Damn.
[1569] Can I end on a joke?
[1570] It's a really quick one.
[1571] Of course.
[1572] Okay, this is kind of an awful joke.
[1573] You're going to feel slightly bad for you.
[1574] Okay.
[1575] So why do they not tell jokes about the Reverend Jim Jones?
[1576] Why?
[1577] Because the punchline is too long.
[1578] Wow, that's how you do a fucking hometown.
[1579] Fuck.
[1580] And then just end with just a touch of light humor.
[1581] Beautiful.
[1582] A joke that we would get hate mail for.
[1583] but was adorable when she did it.
[1584] You do it.
[1585] So we appreciate that because I want nothing more than to say that joke every day of my life.
[1586] Columbus, this has been an amazing show.
[1587] Thank you.
[1588] You guys have been so open and kind and wonderful to us and we really appreciate it.
[1589] We're so happy to be here.
[1590] We'll definitely be back.
[1591] We do say this all the time, but all the credit we're getting is the work you guys are doing.
[1592] So like you are becoming all full.
[1593] friends with each other, you all are hanging out and having a great time and supporting each other.
[1594] It's just this insane, amazing community that's growing up out of Georgia and I bullshitting on her couch.
[1595] It's so, it's such an honor to be a part of this with you.
[1596] We cannot tell you how much fun we're having and how awesome it is.
[1597] Thank you so, so much, honestly.
[1598] And so finally, to wrap up, please stay sexy.