30 - The F*ck Word Murder Mystery Show

[0] This is exactly right.

[1] Hey, this is exciting.

[2] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[3] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster, detectives.

[4] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[5] Who killed Saz?

[6] And were they really after Charles?

[7] Why would someone want to kill Charles?

[8] This season, murder hits close to home.

[9] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[10] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[11] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[12] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[13] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfinacus, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, DeVine, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[14] Only murders in the building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[15] Goodbye.

[16] Ready.

[17] Are you?

[18] I'm ready.

[19] Let's be really low energy this time.

[20] Let's be as quiet as we can.

[21] Yes.

[22] I screwed it up already.

[23] Yes.

[24] You want to be quiet?

[25] Yes.

[26] It's all I've ever wanted.

[27] Oh, God.

[28] Hi, welcome to my favorite murder.

[29] That's Georgia Hard Star.

[30] That's Karen Kilgariff.

[31] Um, the quietest, we're the quietest girls.

[32] We're so quiet on podcast.

[33] Um, thanks for, thanks for being here.

[34] It's like spending your, spending an hour with us.

[35] Thanks, thanks.

[36] Thinking about things with us.

[37] Guys, there's so much going on in our world.

[38] Not the least of which is.

[39] How Georgia doesn't like stranger things.

[40] Oh, there's someone at the door.

[41] They're here to hang you from the highest limb of a tree.

[42] I don't not like it.

[43] I have issues with it.

[44] Okay, let's hear on.

[45] Well, it reminds me, remember the old Stephen King movies that would be made of Stephen King books that would be on, that would be made for TV?

[46] like thinner and how ridiculous they were and if you guys say what about true or pet cemetery go back and watch it again it's the corniest movie but it would that was a feature film right and there was some scary shit in yes i love that movie but if you go back you're like oh this is so corny it doesn't hold up no um and it reminds me kind of of that of steven king like made for tv movies and maybe it's kind of supposed to but i also just it reminded me of like someone who doesn't read sci -fi made a show about sci -fi.

[47] Yes.

[48] And like, I feel like if it's the kind of movie where if someone who had read the book were watching it, which I know there's not a book, but if you were, you'd be like, why the fuck did they leave this thing out?

[49] This was the most important part.

[50] Like, I feel like I would have been screaming that if I had read the book.

[51] Well, you know, I've found, I think because I like seeing, I'm at that stage where that kind of necessarily Alja works on me because it's from when I was 10.

[52] Yeah.

[53] I love the look and feel, but that other stuff took me out of it.

[54] Well, and it's really hard to connect.

[55] This is kind of like the Stephen King problem and like lost.

[56] A lot of those things, when you get your big good idea that's going to freak people out and hook people in and then you try to connect that with kind of believable science or something grounded, it's very difficult to do.

[57] So it's like the upside down, right?

[58] is what it was called.

[59] Like, but there was nothing.

[60] But the fact that you just kind of entered it through this weird, I mean, yeah, and you could go get your, like, it just, yeah, there was a lot of, wait, what in it for me?

[61] Like, and if you can walk into it, then why does she have to go into the thing to get into it?

[62] Right.

[63] And like, well, what is it?

[64] What is it made out of?

[65] Why did this happen?

[66] Why did this person exist?

[67] Yeah.

[68] Why did they, how did she get out of the, yeah.

[69] Yeah.

[70] It's, this is another episode of.

[71] Georgia can't suspend her disbelief.

[72] You know, and it's a valid angle.

[73] I do, however, like, the night of I've gone through, I'm three episodes in.

[74] Okay.

[75] Well, when you get to the episode that aired last night.

[76] Oh, my God.

[77] First of all, I keep falling asleep in front of the TV after watching Night of and then dreaming about Riz Ahmed all night, which makes me crazy.

[78] They were showing photos of him as a kid, like, as part of this show, but they were real photos of him as a kid.

[79] And I was like, I want that DNA inside of me. Like, I want that baby.

[80] That sounded gross.

[81] That's like, that's the biggest kind of crush you can have when you want their DNA.

[82] Because what's your DNA inside me?

[83] That's like a serial killer Valentine.

[84] That's a serial killer Valentine.

[85] Um, no, that's how I feel about him.

[86] I, I, I steal that idea from you.

[87] And I don't want to sleep with him.

[88] I have a husband that I love who doesn't want kids.

[89] So I'll just have one from him with big eyes and like beautiful.

[90] You mean after he and I. I marry and have many of our own.

[91] Can we get into a thing here?

[92] I guess we could.

[93] Make it kind of a fun.

[94] It would be good for the podcast.

[95] There's a thing that happens that I wish you were up to my episode because it actually kind of loops into this podcast and it's just a fascinating angle.

[96] Say it.

[97] I don't care.

[98] Is it going to spoil for everyone, including me?

[99] No. Okay, I don't care then say it.

[100] But if you haven't seen past like George is on episode three, and if you don't want anything, just don't listen to this part.

[101] And it's the, remember when they stop at the gas station and there's that guy that's got the hearse that he walks by and the guy gives him a weird lie.

[102] He comes back.

[103] They all come back.

[104] He comes back big time.

[105] Okay, him and then the guy who was yelling racial slurs at them, he was walking with someone else down the sidewalk and when he's being interviewed, he says he was alone.

[106] Of course, that's a big thing.

[107] I also think that the stepdad is going to come back.

[108] Yes.

[109] Right?

[110] You got to catch up because there's some good stuff happening.

[111] It got, you know, they had to do a lot of exposition and setting that thing up of him being in jail, which bums me out.

[112] Yeah, that was long.

[113] It's such a bummer jail.

[114] It's a very long, long show.

[115] I love it, though.

[116] Episotic.

[117] Okay, two things.

[118] It's like a play.

[119] It is like a play.

[120] I would watch a whole show of just John Totoro and about his ex -execis.

[121] didn't know there were eczema support groups that's fascinating those poor those poor people they can't date they don't want anyone to look at them was that awful yeah that's amazing and then last night yesterday when i watched it janet colgate is now a character from dirty ron scoundrels what you know the the female lawyer oh yes yes yes yes yes yes yes i got so happy when i named her name janet colgate i said when she came on screen I said it in, like, in a, the accent that was said in, and I think Vince was like, who did I, what did I marry?

[122] Wait, what's that actress's name?

[123] You think, I can remember her character from a cheesy movie from the 80s, but I can't remember her real name.

[124] Her name is.

[125] You get this.

[126] You always get this.

[127] I know, but it's hot.

[128] Nope.

[129] It's.

[130] Stacey Nancy.

[131] Stacey Nancy.

[132] It's my favorite actress, Stacey Nancy, from such plays as.

[133] Nancy St. St. St. St. St. St. Stacey.

[134] That's the best stage name of all time.

[135] Taking it.

[136] Stealing it.

[137] My favorite murder with Karen Gilgare.

[138] And Nancy St. St. St. St. Oh, my God.

[139] That's good.

[140] I'm so sweaty.

[141] Are you looking it up, Stephen?

[142] What is it, Stephen?

[143] Is the letter P in her first or last name?

[144] Vanelopee.

[145] Not at all.

[146] God damn it.

[147] Then just say your name.

[148] It's Glenn Headley.

[149] Glenn Headley.

[150] You said that as if it was in your tongue.

[151] It was not.

[152] it was nowhere near my brain.

[153] Glenn Headley?

[154] Glenn Headley.

[155] She's such a great actress.

[156] She is, but oh, her name.

[157] Stephen R. Morris, thank you for that.

[158] Yeah.

[159] Anytime.

[160] That's like one of those white waspy names I would have never gotten.

[161] Yeah.

[162] In my world, girls can't be named Glenn.

[163] I've definitely never heard that before.

[164] Yeah.

[165] That's a family name, I'm sure.

[166] I'm sure it is.

[167] That's on a crest somewhere.

[168] So two thumbs up for the night of.

[169] Yeah, watch it.

[170] We're not talking about this.

[171] We're not talking about stranger things.

[172] anymore.

[173] It's gone off.

[174] I, did you like the ending that they left it open, obviously, for a second season?

[175] I'm going to admit, I fell asleep at some point in the later episodes, and I can't remember how it ends.

[176] They ended it in a way that was, there's just like no satisfying ending.

[177] Can I tell you?

[178] Because do you think they're going to be a season two?

[179] Well, Nancy and Steve are still together.

[180] What?

[181] Yeah.

[182] But she didn't love him.

[183] Does she?

[184] She doesn't.

[185] Does she love fake Ben Schwartz?

[186] that's all I could see when I saw him.

[187] Did you see that?

[188] That's exactly what he looks like.

[189] He looks so much, he's like wasp Ben Schwartz.

[190] Yeah, he looks like if Ben Schwartz got put through a rock and roll machine.

[191] Everyone look at Ben Schwartz, I promise.

[192] Nothing wrong with him, but I just couldn't see that character.

[193] But sorry, she goes back to him.

[194] I feel like I just, I should have spoiled alerted that.

[195] Yeah, that's a big spoiler alert.

[196] Excuse me. I feel like I just burped really loudly and like, without warning anyone or saying, excuse me before or after?

[197] Excuse me. Excuse me. Can I say, can I read you my favorite tweet that we've gotten on the My Favorite Murder Twitter account?

[198] Always.

[199] This is Tweet Corner with Karen.

[200] Tweet Corner, welcome.

[201] Mir, meer, meo.

[202] Why did you just meow?

[203] That's the theme song.

[204] Mimi, the unsung cat of the Hard Star Cowshold.

[205] She sings the theme song to Tweet Corner.

[206] Meow, meow, meow, meow.

[207] Mimi's got to have her, her spot in the...

[208] Yeah, this is it.

[209] She's come to shine.

[210] Ready, Mimi?

[211] Meow, meow, meow.

[212] She's totally asleep.

[213] Someone on Twitter named Trash Panda IRL.

[214] I love it already.

[215] That's not a real person.

[216] Read what her name is.

[217] Oh, tween sensation.

[218] Tween sensation is her handle.

[219] Trash Panda.

[220] IRL is her, I don't know.

[221] I like.

[222] I don't know.

[223] Trash Panda.

[224] And on.

[225] her on her Twitter account, sorry, but I just noticed this.

[226] Her header picture is a picture of Barb and it says, in memory of Barb, we see you on the other side.

[227] That's incredible.

[228] And it's an illustration of Barb from Stranger Things.

[229] Hell yeah, Trash Panda.

[230] Way to bring it all around.

[231] So she tweeted at us and said, my dad keeps calling your show the fuckword murder mystery show because he can't remember the name.

[232] And I cannot stop laughing at that.

[233] Say it again.

[234] My dad keeps calling your show the fuckword mystery, murder mystery show, because he can't remember the name.

[235] That is so, first of all, if my dad heard a podcast where girls were saying the F word, he would pull the stereo out of the car and throw it on the highway.

[236] I swear, if my dad ever hears this, he's going to call me with such a stern tone.

[237] And so I love the fact that Trash Panda IRL's dad is even listening to it at all.

[238] him.

[239] I love him.

[240] He sounds like my dad.

[241] And I think we might need to change the name of this podcast to the fuckword murder mystery show.

[242] I try not to do this, but someone who makes the memes needs to get our logo and change it into, say it one more tongue because it makes me so happy.

[243] The fuck word murder mystery show.

[244] It's just beautiful.

[245] Can I read you something that's probably going to make you want to cry?

[246] Yes.

[247] You ready for this?

[248] Uh -huh.

[249] Okay.

[250] Wait.

[251] Are you, shit, yeah.

[252] Oh, no. Should I start crying first?

[253] Start crying now.

[254] I'll just think about it.

[255] Oh, no. What happened?

[256] Oh, wait, no. Should I cry because you can't find it?

[257] Here we go.

[258] Ready.

[259] All right.

[260] Wait.

[261] Oh, son of a bitch.

[262] Okay, I found it.

[263] Okay.

[264] I'm emotionally ready for you to read whatever this is.

[265] Liz C on the Facebook page says, I'm 19 years old and fighting cancer at the moment Ready to cry?

[266] My dad and I listen to the podcast On the way to the hospital and back It's a great way to keep my mind off things Except now I'm scared to get murders LMAO I can't wait for the new shirts to come out I'm definitely going to be wearing it to the hospital Love all you murderinos And then there's 200 comments including mine That says your neck shirt is on the fucking house what's her name Liz Liz Yeah Liz Hey Liz You fight the good fight You get in there You do your fucking chemo Or however you're Taking care of this business And get it taken care of And get it out of you And many years of this Stupid bullshit to come Wait the podcast or cancer No no None of that Only the podcast And then general fun things in life Yeah Murder cancer You're going to be the smartest person you know because you've dealt with this thing.

[267] And you're going to have a great perspective on life.

[268] I actually know many cancer survivors.

[269] And the cool part about it is once you get through that, all that bullshit of like, that girl took my brush and now I'm going to try to ruin.

[270] And you don't do that shit anymore because you're like, you're like, oh, I understand what loss is.

[271] And I understand the gift of life that we have right now.

[272] And my family who was there for me when I like that we were able to get through this together, the fact that her dad listens to that.

[273] the word that listens to this bullshit you guys sorry we curse stay strong we love you we're thinking of you murder cancer and also anyone else who might be going through some shit and with us in their ears I bet it happens more often than not I guess I have to say too we got another email this week and I kind of get them a lot because I talk about depression and anxiety constantly that a good place to get therapy therapist referrals is psychology today they have a website that you just put in your zip code there's photos and descriptions and it's a really great place to get referrals for therapists which that's where i found mine and that's where georgia found hers we're big on therapy you guys take care of yourselves yes for sure hey oh and homekeeping homekeeping what It's hard for us to be emotional, so our transition out is not going to be as clean as you might find on the more professional podcast.

[274] I'm stuttering because I was vulnerable and it makes me feel awful.

[275] It also, it feels weird that we started this thing talking to each other in your apartment and now we're actually connecting to real human beings.

[276] I know, I just, it came real all of a sudden and now I'm super self -conscious.

[277] It's very, it's super weird.

[278] Yeah.

[279] It's a weird feeling.

[280] I know.

[281] I got a really sweet.

[282] email from a girl in L .A. being like, I don't know.

[283] It was to both of us.

[284] I'm sorry.

[285] I just fucking took it over and emailed her back immediately.

[286] God damn you.

[287] I'm sorry.

[288] But she was like, I don't know what to do.

[289] I don't know where to find a therapist.

[290] What do I?

[291] Blah.

[292] And it was just like I felt so good being able to offer that.

[293] I know.

[294] I mean, Jesus.

[295] We're all humans.

[296] And also just, it's nice to help people.

[297] It is.

[298] And or feel like you're entertaining them or just doing anything worthwhile.

[299] Yeah.

[300] Or knowing the shit that you've gone through is that then you're able to help other people because of it.

[301] It's of use.

[302] It wasn't for no reason.

[303] No. That's right.

[304] Right.

[305] Yeah.

[306] Guys.

[307] Oh, homekeeping.

[308] Let's have 10 minutes of silence.

[309] Homekeeping.

[310] Homekeeping.

[311] Um, on August 28th, here's the thing.

[312] Now we're getting into live shows.

[313] That's, that's what we're doing now.

[314] Yeah.

[315] Not our own yet, but we're doing other people's and then we're going to slowly build into, I don't know, world tour.

[316] I'd like to go on a world tour.

[317] Madonna style.

[318] Oh, for sure.

[319] Cone bras.

[320] Cone bras.

[321] And, like, I'd like a bus that we sleep in.

[322] Yeah.

[323] That we drive around on the highways at night.

[324] I don't want to do that.

[325] Can there be a pole in it?

[326] I don't want to die in a bus.

[327] What do you?

[328] A pole?

[329] Like a stripper pole.

[330] And, like, when, we're having parties and, like, that's what I think of Madonna and like cute gay men on the stripper pole.

[331] Okay.

[332] Wait, in the bus?

[333] Yeah, but I don't want to go on the bus.

[334] Oh, okay.

[335] Where do you want the pole?

[336] On the bus.

[337] Yes to the bus or no to the bus?

[338] Yes to the bus with the pole.

[339] I'll meet you there.

[340] So I'll have the fun and I'll tell you what happened on the bus.

[341] If we go on the bus, I'm going to sit in the front seats with a seatbelt on, hey, awake the whole time.

[342] I have the solution.

[343] You drive the bus.

[344] Boom.

[345] I'm fucking in.

[346] So I will do that.

[347] I'm such a control freak.

[348] Last seat driver's license.

[349] Fine.

[350] Let's do this thing.

[351] Cool.

[352] We are doing.

[353] So Dan Harmon has a fan.

[354] podcast here on Farrell Audio called Harmontown and he does live versions of this podcast and we're doing the next one and the podcast is live always yeah oh um I'm a huge fan always have been um I wasn't sure if you were kidding yeah of course yeah it's always live it's Sunday nights it's live at meltdown shit that's where they record it yeah we're definitely editing this part out Merk it.

[355] On Sunday.

[356] Wait, do you really want to?

[357] No. Okay, it's funny.

[358] I don't think he would care.

[359] I don't think he would care.

[360] On Sunday, August 28, 8 o 'clock?

[361] At 8 o 'clock, right?

[362] I mean, yes.

[363] Now, this part could be wrong.

[364] We're doing harm in town, the live, the always live podcast at Meltdown Comics.

[365] Come down there if you want to watch and be a part of things.

[366] I'm assuming said eight because that's when the most of the main shows start.

[367] It's got to be, I bet eight to ten.

[368] Bet you anything.

[369] Eight to ten.

[370] I guess I'm hedging it because it could be a seven to nineer.

[371] But what percentage of these people are going to come?

[372] Because it's in L .A. Right.

[373] Do you think a percentage will?

[374] 0 .7?

[375] Who are listening now, you mean?

[376] Oh, hard to say, hard to tell.

[377] Well, I bet the, well.

[378] There might be an eccentric millionaire who's like warm up the jet.

[379] we're going to L .A. for this one show.

[380] Yeah, get the cash full of money.

[381] Get the envelope full of cash.

[382] Just an envelope or do you want to bring a briefcase?

[383] I am so hot right now.

[384] I know it's really hot.

[385] It's so hot in here that my brain is malfunctioning.

[386] It is 8 o 'clock.

[387] It's 8 o 'clock.

[388] It's fucking God.

[389] Thank you.

[390] And it's live, right?

[391] Just kidding.

[392] Yeah, we're doing that.

[393] We're really excited.

[394] That's going to be fun.

[395] We are quite honored.

[396] I mean, Dan Harmon's a bit of a legend.

[397] I mean, he's incredible.

[398] Watching him on stage, if you haven't seen him fucking perform, he's just like, he's another, he's just like transformed into this like, the beast.

[399] This beast.

[400] Anyways.

[401] It honestly sounds like they're watching Stranger Things really loud next door.

[402] I think they, I was thinking that earlier because I thought I heard the awesome theme song.

[403] Let's watch it.

[404] Let's listen through the walls to the whole episode.

[405] Yeah, so you can.

[406] Great.

[407] I think that's it for the homekeeping.

[408] Oh, Tyspring .com slash my favorite murder for your new shirt.

[409] We have our main logo on Tyspring .com right now until the 23rd of August, and then we'll have other shirts.

[410] But if you want one, go get it.

[411] And then more designs will are to come.

[412] Yeah, we're working on some shit, you guys.

[413] It's exciting.

[414] Some fun stuff.

[415] We're working on a thing that made me at Vince's birthday the other night at a book.

[416] bar when Georgia and our friend Kat showed it to me made me scream.

[417] Yeah.

[418] I was happy that you got so excited about it.

[419] It makes me very happy.

[420] Okay.

[421] Cool.

[422] I'm excited.

[423] Hey, this is exciting.

[424] An all -new season of only murders in the building is coming to Hulu on August 27th.

[425] Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez are back as your favorite podcaster detectives.

[426] But there's a mystery hanging over everyone.

[427] Who killed Saz?

[428] And were they really after Charles?

[429] Why would someone want to kill Charles.

[430] This season, murder hits close to home.

[431] With a threat against one of their own, the stakes are higher than ever.

[432] Plus, the gang is going to Hollywood to turn their podcast into a major movie.

[433] Amid the glitz and glamour of Los Angeles, more mysteries and twists arise.

[434] Who knows what will happen once the cameras start to roll?

[435] Get ready for the stariest season yet with Merrill Streep, Zach Alfenakis, Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Melissa McCarthy, Davey, Joy Randolph, Molly Shannon, and more.

[436] Only murders in the building, premieres August 27th, streaming only on Hulu.

[437] Goodbye.

[438] Karen, you know I'm all about vintage shopping.

[439] Absolutely.

[440] And when you say vintage, you mean when you physically drive to a store and actually purchase something with cash?

[441] Exactly.

[442] And if you're a small business owner, you might know Shopify is great for online sales.

[443] But did you know that they also power in -person sales?

[444] That's right.

[445] Shopify is the sound of selling everywhere, online, in -store, on social media, and beyond.

[446] Give your point -of -sales system a serious upgrade with Shopify.

[447] From accepting payments to managing inventory, they have everything you need to sell in person.

[448] So give your point of sale system a serious upgrade with Shopify.

[449] Their sleek, reliable POS hardware takes every major payment method and looks fabulous at the same time.

[450] With Shopify, we have a powerful partner for managing our sales, and if you're a business owner, you can too.

[451] Connect with customers in line and online.

[452] Do retail right with Shopify.

[453] Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify .com slash murder.

[454] important note that promo code is all lowercase go to shopify .com slash murder to take your retail business to the next level today that's shopify dot com slash murder goodbye I think you're first this week am I first okay all right settle in Karen okay get ready to hear about something we've talked about we've touched on before okay but we never delved into okay the you have seven Murders, Carrie Stainer.

[455] As we know, and we've talked about, Carrie Stainer, here's just like the beginning of the fucked up in this.

[456] Carrie Stainer was the big brother of Stephen Stainer, if you'll remember in 1972, was kidnapped and held captive by a child molester named Kenneth Parnell.

[457] Carrie was the older brother, and he was 11 years.

[458] old when it happened yeah when it happened and Stephen the brother was held captive more than seven years before escaping that itself is a fucked up story that you guys should look up so awful and this was one of our earliest episodes we were trying to remember the name of that the made for tv movie which is called i know my name is steven yes and we we talked about it for way too long and we're still getting people that are tweeting at us and sending us email saying it was called i know my name is stephen it's like that happened six months ago well when you, when we talked about that, that was the first time I found out that these two were brothers, because I knew about Carrie's murders and I knew about Stevens kidnapping, but I didn't know they were connected.

[459] And that just makes it, it makes, it boggles the mind, you know, in a way that's like more than just when you think of a serial killer and you're like, how does your brain do that?

[460] And we have this added piece of fucking childhood trauma in there.

[461] Also, it makes me think this poor family.

[462] Oh my God, totally.

[463] Is left.

[464] standing.

[465] It's just like how much can some people take?

[466] Because it's terrible.

[467] Yeah.

[468] It's so much.

[469] Well, so the year after Stephen came home, he escaped his, his kidnapper.

[470] And freed the other kid.

[471] And freed a little kid who had just got unkidnapped by Kenneth Parnell, who by the way is out of prison.

[472] He went for seven years, I believe, which is shorter than the amount of time he kept Stephen no yep wait is he still alive yeah as far as I mean I read an article that said he was yeah but I think so because I I just read Kenneth Parnell's um Wikipedia page for some weird reason some article brought me and then I went wait I feel like I know about this guy and then realized it was because of Stephen Stainer believe he lives in California like northern California that's a bummer yep Yeah, seven years.

[473] Great.

[474] Anyhew.

[475] Want to get more bummed out?

[476] Ready, here we go.

[477] The following, the year after Stephen came back, I'm going to call him Carrie.

[478] Carrie's uncle was murdered and Carrie was living with an uncle at the time.

[479] But no one considered him as suspect.

[480] And Carrie would later claim that his uncle molested him.

[481] Oh, no. Cut to 1997.

[482] Carrie was hired as a handyman at the Cedar Lodge Motel in El Port.

[483] Just outside of the highway, 1 -40, Arc Rock entrance to Yosemite National Park.

[484] So just outside Yosemite, Cedar Lodge.

[485] The weekend before February 1999, he was having these murderous fantasies that had become so intense that he knew he was going to murder someone.

[486] He prepared a murder rape kit containing a rope, a roll of duct tape, and a serrated kitchen knife, and later a gun and a camera.

[487] As far as we know, other, besides his uncle, which may or may not have happened, this is his first, these are his first murders.

[488] Okay.

[489] So on Valentine's Day, 1999, Carol's son, who was 42, her daughter, Julie, who was 15, and Sylvina Pelosi, who was 16, were his first victims.

[490] Carol was initially leery of Carrie when he knocked on their cabin door saying he had to fix a fan in the bathroom.

[491] she talked him through the window and didn't want to let him in and only did so after he said he'd go get the manager to like confirm it and she was like no no no no that's okay you know the way people do when they give you the double confirmation of like oh don't worry don't do the thing you want me to do right well if you say that then well if you say you're going to do the thing i want you to do then you must be legit right then okay yeah all right i'll do it so but once inside he pulls out a 22 caliber pistol he tells them him, he's desperate, quote, and orders him to lie face down on the bed.

[492] He bounds their hands with duct tape, gags them, and then he took the two girls into the bathroom.

[493] He strangles Carol with a three -foot piece of rope later saying in his taped confession, I didn't realize how hard it is to strangle a person.

[494] It's not easy, but I had very little feeling it was like performing a task.

[495] Yeah, keep that in mind if it's really hard to strangle.

[496] somebody.

[497] It's very hard.

[498] So don't, maybe don't do it.

[499] Yeah, it's harder than one thing.

[500] So after putting her in the trunk of her rented Pontiac, he, uh, goes back to the girls, cuts their clothes off.

[501] And then, um, he strangles Sylviana in the bathroom.

[502] And then he sexually assaults Julie in the family motel room and then wraps her up.

[503] Um, and ties, he ties her to the bed.

[504] He says, he felt like he was in control for the first time in his life and he cleaned up the crime scene so well that it appeared that the women had checked out and left when the when the people came to check when the staff came later to check to see if they were there um they had detected no foul play let's see he even wiped his hair off the bed sheets and then when the FBI agent asked on tape why he did that he replied I watched the Discovery Channel.

[505] Oh, no. Hi, that's all of us.

[506] Yep.

[507] Oh, yeah.

[508] Everyone's getting real smart about forensics together.

[509] Mm -hmm.

[510] Good and bad.

[511] Yeah, for sure.

[512] So at 4 a .m., he takes Julie out of the motel and drives her away in the rental car with her mother and friend in the trunk dead.

[513] So she's still alive?

[514] Yes.

[515] Okay.

[516] And I don't know, I don't think she knows that those two are dead and in the trunk because he, kind of, there was two motel rooms that he was going between and I don't think she ever saw the bodies.

[517] She just thought she was separated.

[518] Yeah.

[519] So she says, he says, I didn't know where I was going or what I was doing.

[520] I just kept driving and driving.

[521] And he said about Julie, she was a very likable girl.

[522] He said, crying on tape.

[523] She was very calm.

[524] So Don is approaching.

[525] He turns off at Lake Don Pedro and carries Julie up a dirt path to a small clearing overlooking the water.

[526] I told her, I wished I could keep her, he said.

[527] Then he sexually assaulted her again.

[528] Finally, brushed her hair and fanned it out on the ground beneath her head.

[529] I told her I loved her, he said, and then he slit her throat.

[530] Oh, no. I didn't want her to suffer the way the other two did.

[531] A too late asshole.

[532] I know.

[533] Like, I think because he choked them manually, he was thinking that it was taking longer, so he slit her throat thinking he was...

[534] Comparatively.

[535] Yeah, like thinking he was being compassionate.

[536] it.

[537] So he hides her body and he drives the car with the body's in the trunk as far as he couldn't do the forest.

[538] Then he takes a cab back to Yosemite, pays with the fare with the $150 he stole from Carol's purse.

[539] Two days later, he returns to the car with a can of gasoline and scratches, we have Sarah on the hood with a pocket knife.

[540] And then he lights the car on fire.

[541] Then he drove two hours west and dumped Carol's billfold on a Modesto Street corner to fool the police.

[542] This is near where you're from, kind of.

[543] Kind of.

[544] It's the central valley.

[545] Okay.

[546] We're more on the coast.

[547] Okay.

[548] So more than a month later, the remains of Carol Sund and Poloso were found in the burned out rental car abandoned along a logging road.

[549] And six days later, the FBI received an anonymous letter with a crudely drawn map and a message.

[550] We had fun with this one.

[551] And following the map, the searchers found Julie.

[552] The detectives began interviewing employees of the Cedar Lodge Motel where the first three victims had been staying just before their deaths.

[553] One of the employees was Carrie.

[554] But he was not considered a suspect at that point because no criminal history and remained calm during the police interview.

[555] Fucking psychopath, right?

[556] Oh my God.

[557] FBI agents and local police rounded up a bunch of meth heads and sex offenders and told the tourists and residents that they were confident they had the killers in custody.

[558] That Okay, so another woman disappears on July 22nd.

[559] This is Joey Ruth Armstrong, J -O -I -E, who was 26.

[560] She was a pretty redhead who worked for the Yosemite Institute teaching children about nature.

[561] Oh, sweet angel.

[562] She worked at the, let's see, was lone in the isolated cabin where she lived when Carrie came upon her.

[563] Man, we can't have anything.

[564] We can't even live alone.

[565] Well, but living in a cabin alone in the woods.

[566] Yeah, but guys can't do it.

[567] What?

[568] Guys get to live alone in the cabin in the woods without getting murdered for the most part.

[569] Yeah, and they're guys.

[570] That's what I'm saying.

[571] It's not fair.

[572] No, I know.

[573] I'm more, and I'm still in the mode of, if you're going to live in a cabin in the woods, then pull your gun out anytime someone approaches your home.

[574] Yeah.

[575] Like, I don't know.

[576] Or big dogs, big anger, scary dogs.

[577] Prev Maga.

[578] I don't know.

[579] Yeah, no, I get it.

[580] Don't be all chill.

[581] yeah I wouldn't want to live I like living in a big city where there's just people everywhere yeah on top of you all the time so according to the interview Carrie confronted Armstrong a gunpoint on the front porch of her cabin oh he had a gun yeah he told her it was a robbery enforced her into the cabin and covered her mouth and bound her hands behind her back with duct tape then he put her in his sports utility vehicle SUV I could have just said that thank you someone needed a extra word count in their newspaper piece right did you also draw a picture yeah page five is just one big well i copied a couple of these sentences and that was one of them and now i'm like that guy just needed a higher word count oh yeah for sure yeah he said i lost control of myself and i lost control of her um let's see he said when this started out i had no intention of cutting her head off which he later did spoiler alert man he says the has no intention of cutting her head off.

[582] I had no intentions of killing her even the first time I saw her.

[583] Yeah, right.

[584] Then I started thinking about it.

[585] It was in the house.

[586] There was, there was nobody in the house with her.

[587] She kept walking out by herself and she watered the plants and it was obvious she was taking off and getting ready to go.

[588] That's when I started talking to her.

[589] So the assistant US attorney then, okay, in court papers it was said.

[590] After he had driven a short distance, she dove head first out of the wind through the window out of the moving truck and still bound with duct tape ran through the woods toward the nearby community of Forista to get help.

[591] Hell yeah.

[592] Girl, good for you.

[593] Fight your fucking last fight.

[594] Yeah.

[595] You know?

[596] I don't know if that was the right saying.

[597] While Carrie ultimately subdued Armstrong, she fought so crazy and with such passion that Stainer wasn't able to do his normal cleanup job, like obsessive cleanup job.

[598] He disposed of her beheaded body near in a near.

[599] nearby stream and the head turned up 27 feet away in a hurry he fleed and a close source he fled he fleed no he fleed Karen don't fucking correct her let her count he fleed sorry to correct you no you're right he fled a close a source close to the investigation oh my god I think you were pointing that out no I did not catch that says it was a fight from start to finish she tried to get away and she almost did get away, and though several minutes of struggle left behind a lot of evidence.

[600] Her determined fight for life denied him the chance to cover up the crime scene, and it led to his capture and undoubtedly saved other lives.

[601] Yes.

[602] She basically ended it.

[603] Yep, by fighting that hard.

[604] She fucking fought so hard that he lost it.

[605] And like, so in his haste, he left behind footprints, and basically his car was seen around the area.

[606] It was really distinctive.

[607] The tire tracks as well as were as, were as well.

[608] And so the vehicle was traced to him and he was arrested.

[609] And during his interrogation, he confessed to all four murders.

[610] He pled not guilty by reason of insanity.

[611] And a doctor testified that he had mild autism, obsessive compulsive disorder, and parapheria.

[612] At one point during the trial, the judge, Thomas C. Hastings, had to leave the courtroom so he could compose himself in private because the testimony was so fucked up.

[613] He returned several minutes later red -faced and misty -eyed.

[614] A judge.

[615] The circumstances of this case are horrendous and devastating, he said before announcing the sentence.

[616] Carrie was found sane and convicted of four counts of first -degree murder by a jury in 2001.

[617] He was sentenced to death and is still in San Quentin.

[618] He claimed after his arrest, so everyone's like, did you get these murders tendency is because of the stuff with your brother and all this like horrible stuff that happened to as a kid but he said after his arrested he had fantasized about murder and women since he was seven years old long before the abduction of his brother.

[619] So what are the chances like those two traumatic fucks up things are going to happen in one family?

[620] So awful.

[621] Okay and then I went on Facebook and found a hometown murder from a reader so I'm going to read it.

[622] Okay.

[623] So Taylor C says in June of 1999, I was 11 and my brother was 8.

[624] My family and I went on a road trip to Yosemite from L .A. and all caps stayed in the Cedar Lodge Motel.

[625] This is, for everyone, this is right between the murder of the three women and the murder of the single woman, like months before, like months in between.

[626] Oh, man. Around 9 .30 at night, my brother and I were watching Batman and Robin and we get a knock at the door.

[627] My mom looks through the people, sees some dude and asks what he wants.

[628] wants.

[629] He says, pizza delivery.

[630] We had already eaten, so we knew no one had ordered a pizza.

[631] My mom tells him as much, and he insists that we did.

[632] My mom tells him that he must have been mistaken, but he keeps insisting.

[633] After a certain point, my mom walks away and assumes he did as well.

[634] Several minutes of knocking later, my mom calls the hotel management.

[635] He must have heard her on the phone because when they showed up, he was gone.

[636] My mom filed a police report, but nothing really ever came of it.

[637] I think when they caught him, she was briefly interviewed, but because she didn't get a good look at him, she wasn't useful in the case.

[638] To think, my brother and I could have died while watching Arnold laying down some truly excellent ice puns.

[639] Because they were watching, where'd it go?

[640] Batman and Robin.

[641] Fucked up shit.

[642] Was it, did she say it was just her mom?

[643] It was her brother and her mom?

[644] Her and her brother and her mom.

[645] so like he spotted like moms with kids yeah he must have targeted them man but why would you do it again in the same i mean i guess you didn't get caught the first one yeah you didn't get caught and you're cocky and he has still has the fantasy like he still has it's the compulsion and then there's sometimes that thing of like maybe you wanted to get caught yes well it surprised me when you said that he cried when he was talking about the first girl well when that when the when During the trial, when a lot of the stuff is being, or when he was listening to his own testimony, he would, he would plug up his ears and cry.

[646] Like, he couldn't listen to it, even though when he was giving that information during the interrogation, he was like, like, dead, you know, emotionally dead.

[647] Wow.

[648] So either that was just for the, just for the show, for the jury.

[649] Oh, that's true.

[650] Or, you know, maybe he was on antipsychotics or something at that point and understood.

[651] Or if he was like, yeah, if he was like, hadn't processed anything.

[652] Wow.

[653] Or hadn't been meeting with therapists or something at that point and kind of.

[654] I mean, but to, but to have the urge to kill like that, I think does put you in like the, in the psychopathic area.

[655] I can't imagine.

[656] Like, just, it's like.

[657] And since he was seven, that's, yeah.

[658] He must have had some fucked up things happening.

[659] him way early on.

[660] And did they ever, do you know, if they ever connected him to the uncle's murder?

[661] There's like not a lot of recent articles.

[662] It's like they're looking into it stuff and trying to piece together like other murders in the area see if he's got any link to them, but it doesn't really look like it.

[663] Wow.

[664] Plus if he confessed to all of those, like why wouldn't he confess to more of them?

[665] But who knows?

[666] Yeah.

[667] That's a good one.

[668] Oh, and then did you know that the brother, Stephen Stannard, died when he was 24 in a motorcycle.

[669] I know.

[670] motorcycle accident.

[671] Man, that's a rough life.

[672] Yeah, that's just, it's nothing but awfulness.

[673] Yeah, the rest of that family.

[674] Ugh.

[675] Didn't he die on the motorcycle accident, like, relatively soon after he came back?

[676] He died when he was 24.

[677] Oh, okay.

[678] So I think...

[679] He came back in his teens, right?

[680] Yeah, maybe 15.

[681] Oh, okay.

[682] Yeah.

[683] So, yeah, that's deep and dark.

[684] Well, I hope yours is happy and fun.

[685] Mine is so fun.

[686] It actually kind of is.

[687] It's not as dark.

[688] I do love that, I mean, I do love the stainer story, though.

[689] It's just the heaviest of anything.

[690] Well, I remember when I was, what year was that?

[691] I just remember it, 1999, so I was like, I was 19 or 20, like living in Orange County, which isn't far from Yosemite, like two, three hours.

[692] And I remember hearing both of those, and they got him pretty quickly after the second the girl was beheaded.

[693] But it was just so, and they have photos.

[694] her up and she's just this like hippie sweetheart and you know i i felt so bad for the the girl who was with the mom and sister yeah she was like on vacation with her friend yeah yeah i felt you know i'm sure there's like part of that family that blame there's like guilt and blame and so much so much shit besides just having someone that you love die that was the first thing that i thought of when I heard that story when it originally happened was that's the worst scenario.

[695] Yeah.

[696] It's like being on vacation.

[697] Something happens to your kid when they're on vacation with their friend and they're in their teens.

[698] And you're like kids.

[699] You're trying to like be cool and let them go and like live their life and give them some freedom and you know against better judgment maybe letting them go camping.

[700] Yeah.

[701] Nope.

[702] Buh.

[703] All right.

[704] Are you ready to transition?

[705] Always.

[706] Because mine I actually this, I was watching documentary this weekend about this guy that I'm going to talk about and it's very entertaining even though he is also a murderer um he is more a con man which I actually kind of adore you're like a mobster who won't kill women and children yes you're like you know what you know when you can like pick and choose the bad like this is the kind that I like where it for the most part now he is borderline personality, I think extreme narcissists.

[707] They have all kinds of, you know, the psychiatrist talked about what he was in court.

[708] But he basically what it was, he was a guy who grew up in Germany as a very awkward teen.

[709] In this documentary, they talk about how he, when all their friends would go to like to the lake every summer, he would always go, but he would be fully dressed up.

[710] And he would never, they never saw him in a bathing suit.

[711] Because this Hitler.

[712] That man's name was Mr. Adolf Marie Hitler.

[713] Noah.

[714] This was, well, he was born Christian Carl Gerhard Schreiter.

[715] But he had many names in his long con career.

[716] He also went by the name Chris Chichester.

[717] Chris Crow, Chip Smith, and finally, Clark Rockefeller heir to the Rockefeller film.

[718] You know this guy?

[719] What's the documentary called?

[720] It's called my friend Rockefeller.

[721] Yeah, I never got through it.

[722] So tell me everything.

[723] It is, it's worth getting to the part where Clark Rockefeller or Chris Chichester or Chip Smith or Chris Crow is my favorite, because he, when he was Chris Crow, he claimed to be a relative of Cameron Grove.

[724] He does all these lies that are just small enough.

[725] They're big enough to impress you, but small enough to be believable.

[726] Right.

[727] And it is masterful.

[728] And he's a really legitimately IQ -style intelligent person, but he also doesn't really have any morals.

[729] So most of the time everything's fine because he's just trying to get money and work for himself and get what he wants.

[730] Fair enough.

[731] And doesn't he make like everyone, happy around him too?

[732] Like everyone thinks he's so funny and cool.

[733] For a little what?

[734] Yeah.

[735] I think the limit's two years that people are happy around this guy.

[736] Then he starts getting real irritating.

[737] And that's when he gets kicked out of houses, fired from jobs, what have you.

[738] But, so this is basically how it goes.

[739] He grows up as an awkward teen in Germany.

[740] He has a group of friends.

[741] And in the documentary, the friends get interviewed.

[742] And what I loved is one of the friends goes, I love that he tricked all those rich Americans.

[743] And that part, maybe.

[744] me go, oh yeah, that's true.

[745] He really did get away with huge, huge lies for a really long time.

[746] Yeah.

[747] So here's basically how it went.

[748] Um, he also claimed to be, these are all the things he claimed to be, an actor, a producer, a director, an art collector, a physicist, a ship's captain, a negotiator of international debt agreements, and an English aristocrats.

[749] She was.

[750] He did it all.

[751] So, um, when he was 17, he met an American couple who, had pulled off and asked him for directions on the side of the road.

[752] And he met them, got their names.

[753] And then when he wanted to go to America, when he was 17, he used their names on the like entrance documents to say that they had invited him there and that he was going to go live with them.

[754] Smart.

[755] This was a one -off meeting on like the side of the road.

[756] And those people are also in this documentary.

[757] It's pretty awesome.

[758] So he comes to the United States and he goes to, Meriden, Connecticut, and he finds the family of a backpacker he met once on a train in Germany.

[759] I can't even talk to the person sitting next to me on an airplane.

[760] I have a hard time talking to people I've known for 20 years.

[761] Yeah.

[762] Much less asking people if you can go stay at their parents' house.

[763] Oh, my God.

[764] I ask Vince if I can, like, eat some of his ships because I feel bad about it.

[765] I can't imagine me like, can I stay at your place we met once?

[766] And just weird and uncomfortable.

[767] No. Um, okay, so he explains to them that he is from a very wealthy German family and that he, um, is in America, like he's a foreign exchange student and can he stay with them because he's going to be going to the local high school.

[768] They're totally listening to stranger things.

[769] They're totally listening to stranger things.

[770] Our neighbor, my neighbor sounds like, what are the chances?

[771] That's insane.

[772] I'm sorry.

[773] But also people can't hear it.

[774] No, that's okay.

[775] Oh, shit.

[776] I'm sorry.

[777] Um, if only we could lay in those cues.

[778] as like a radio show.

[779] And really we were just in like in a in a fucking bunker and where are we in Germany?

[780] Sorry.

[781] No, it's okay.

[782] So basically he starts going to high school in Connecticut.

[783] And basically his whole thing is he wants to be American.

[784] He wants to blend in.

[785] He becomes obsessed with Gilligan's Island and he starts talking like Thurston Halberford.

[786] Oh, that's cool.

[787] And when he appears in this documentary, that's who he's talking.

[788] talking like.

[789] And it wasn't until I was reading this article where they mentioned this specifically where I started laughing.

[790] Because they don't talk about him, the documentary?

[791] He does talk about it, but they talk about it like it's an inside.

[792] He goes, the, um, the guy who, uh, makes a documentary who was friends with him brings it up, but they don't like, he be the, um, Clark Rockfeller like kind of brushes it off.

[793] Like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[794] But he totally sounds like him.

[795] But he's talking like this.

[796] Oh my God.

[797] That's perfect.

[798] And he's basically saying.

[799] It's the funniest, but also it's that thing where I don't like to usually, I don't like to listen to killers, especially, I never watch anything where the serial killer's talking.

[800] I don't give a fuck what that guy has to say.

[801] He's evil.

[802] This guy's different, though, because he's a con man first.

[803] And foremost, even though, yes, he's a bad person, killer, all of that.

[804] But he is a fascinating mind.

[805] because he was smart enough to like in as a teen con all these people so he goes he goes to this high school um he uh he decides that he wants to be an actor so he heads west but he makes it as far as wisconsin and he decides he's going to go to the university of wisconsin at Milwaukee um so once he's there um he decides he needs to he's been in in the united states long enough where he needs a green card basically and he's become a citizen.

[806] So he decides he's going to marry a local 22 -year -old woman who he explains to her that he needs the green card because if he gets sent back to Germany, he will have to fight in the Cold War on the Russian front.

[807] Now, if you knew anything about anything, I mean, and I barely know anything about anything, but when I read that, I was like, hey, wait a second.

[808] Pretty sure the Cold War didn't have a front because the Cold War was all about tensions and basically threats.

[809] There's no such thing as...

[810] There was no Russian Front in the Cold War.

[811] I mean, there were places to go.

[812] There were bad things happening, definitely.

[813] If the idea was that he was going to get sent back to East Berlin and have to spy on his neighbors, yes, horrible.

[814] But there was no Russian front.

[815] Or if you were a prisoner of war because of, or not a prisoner of war, accused of war crimes or something like that.

[816] Like a political prisoner.

[817] Right.

[818] But there was no, the Russian front was from World War II.

[819] Yeah.

[820] That was a bad, bad place to be.

[821] Sure.

[822] Anyway, she fell for it and married him.

[823] And the next day, he left for California.

[824] Bye.

[825] So I was like, was she in agreement and fine with it?

[826] But then later I read that she filed for divorce in 1992, 11 years later.

[827] What?

[828] Maybe she was like, needed him.

[829] Maybe she was like a lesbian and like.

[830] He did you appease her family?

[831] Cover story?

[832] Oh, I didn't even think about that.

[833] I was, I immediately wrote the story of she was just heartbroken and, like, pining in Milwaukee.

[834] Oh.

[835] For this fabulous European that bailed on her the day after.

[836] Because it said, um, their wedding.

[837] So it sounded like it wasn't just the basics like city hall signs and papers.

[838] Like they had a wedding.

[839] Oh, no. Um, that's sad.

[840] A little crazy.

[841] All right.

[842] So he, or maybe she, like is like me and is just bad about paperwork and doesn't get shit done in time.

[843] So she's like, oh, that's right.

[844] I have to get divorced.

[845] Yeah.

[846] I'll do it when I meet someone else.

[847] I'll do it.

[848] I'm a good reason that she's on Tinder, swiping, swiping, swiping.

[849] Come on.

[850] So he heads out to California.

[851] Now, this is, it's so fascinating.

[852] He goes to San Marino.

[853] Now, I don't know if you've ever been to Huntington Gardens.

[854] Oh, you're from down here, you know.

[855] San Marino is like, so Pasadena is a rich area that very few people I know live in.

[856] Because it's like, old, money, rich, you know, you have to live out of the city.

[857] San Marino is richer than Pasadena.

[858] It's the city nestled up right next to Pasadena where all the mansions are.

[859] And it's gorgeous.

[860] It's crazy.

[861] There's like, all the streets are like wide and you're legally not allowed to park on the street.

[862] So when people are parked on the street, the cops know that's someone that doesn't belong here.

[863] No. Yeah.

[864] I didn't know that.

[865] Yeah.

[866] There's, you don't see cars on those streets in San Marino because everyone can.

[867] and park in their own driveway.

[868] Fuck off.

[869] But also you legally can't.

[870] Fuck you.

[871] Yeah.

[872] Because they don't want their fucking housekeepers and shit parking there.

[873] Well, I bet the housekeepers are a part of the family.

[874] Okay.

[875] Who knows?

[876] But no, they definitely don't want any of the others.

[877] Any other.

[878] Anyone from outside.

[879] Yeah.

[880] God forbid, you're just like, you're just from like La Cognada and you're just trying to party and chew your gum and smoke your cigarettes and park on the street.

[881] in San Marino.

[882] Don't do it in San Marino.

[883] Don't you do it.

[884] They don't want you there.

[885] So this is a guy who's in his early 20s, like college age.

[886] He's moving to LA to be an actor and he moves to San Marino to get, it doesn't make sense.

[887] San Marino, I looked it up.

[888] It's, it was rated more expensive than Beverly Hills and Malibu to live in.

[889] So it just is nonsensical for like a young actor type to live there.

[890] Sure.

[891] But that's, that's what he was about.

[892] He was like a total, he was thirst and hell of third and he was trying to go become that person in like a very real way.

[893] Yeah.

[894] So he got, he rented the guest house that was in one of the least nice houses in all of San Marino.

[895] There was, there is actually a slightly shabby part, which is just basically not million dollar homes.

[896] And, um, in one of those houses, a woman named D .D. Sohus had a guest house on her property.

[897] D .D. reportedly was an alcoholic who was always dressed in a house coat.

[898] Sounds like.

[899] Hey sister.

[900] High five.

[901] Yeah.

[902] And Dedy had a son named John, who was 5 foot 5, super into Dungeons and Dragons, Coke bottle glasses, and was married to a woman named Linda who was a six foot tall redhead.

[903] They sound like fucking our type of people.

[904] They are, they are our type of people.

[905] They lived in, like, the house adjacent.

[906] So it was almost like this little compound.

[907] And Clark Rockefeller, at the time his name was, let's see, his name here was Christopher Chichester.

[908] Okay.

[909] Which is the dumbest made up name of all time.

[910] That sounds like when I said, what was it, Nancy St. Nancy St. Nancy.

[911] St. St. St. St. St. St. St. That wasn't as bad as.

[912] Chichester.

[913] That's not as bad as Chris Chichester.

[914] Yeah.

[915] it's like you stuttered three times.

[916] Throw more C's in there, you dork.

[917] So, okay.

[918] So he shows up in San Marino.

[919] He gets, he's, he's, he's charming everybody.

[920] And what he tells them is that not only is he a computer expert, a film producer and a stockbroker, he is also the nephew of Lord Mountbatten.

[921] So what I kind of do like about this all is all the people that get tricked by this guy, are people who are label horrors and status horrors.

[922] So anyone that's like...

[923] Impressed by someone talking like Thurston Hell the Third and saying I'm related to Lord Mountain Batten.

[924] Yeah.

[925] Where like in my family, if you said that, it'd be like, well, go do the dishes.

[926] It'd be like, really Lord Mountbatten?

[927] Yeah.

[928] Can you go get some more beer out of the downstairs refrigerator?

[929] Right.

[930] But it's the, it's a lot of people.

[931] And especially that's why he was going to places like San Francisco.

[932] marino you go to places where people work in those worlds and those are the people that are most impressed by you know you're all rich well i'm a blue blood well i'm a royal i'm actually royalty yeah there's someone that can come in and beat them at their own game what's more interesting than that so uh the locals said he was a whiz at everything he uh proved especially popular with the women who were very charmed by his royal bloodline and his courtly manners one of the women said he knew everything about everything and he was just fabulous.

[933] Okay.

[934] So it's not just an act.

[935] He's really getting away with it.

[936] And he was very, very smart.

[937] Sounds like it.

[938] So in 1985, tragedy strikes.

[939] This is two years after Chris moves into the Sohus, the So -Huss's, you know, Dedy's son Jonathan and his wife, Linda, go missing without a trace.

[940] Chris tells everybody that they told him that they were going to go to Europe.

[941] The family got a postcard from France, supposedly from the couple after the disappearance, but its authenticity has been questioned.

[942] And so soon after they disappear, Didi Sohus disinherited her son, who was beloved to her up until that point.

[943] The police think that she was convinced that he had abandoned her.

[944] Oh, no. And after when Didi died, they found that $180 ,000 of her estate had been looted.

[945] Her entire state, sorry, her entire state was worth $180 ,000 and all of it had been taken.

[946] Oh, that's so sad.

[947] So.

[948] Dungeons and dragons.

[949] Dungeons and dragons.

[950] I just say that like it's, I mean something by it.

[951] I know.

[952] I do too.

[953] And dragons.

[954] Yeah.

[955] But we know what we mean.

[956] In the late 80s, police pull.

[957] Christopher Chichester over in Greenwich, Connecticut, he's driving Jonathan Sohuss's truck.

[958] Uh -oh.

[959] The police, he leaves the area before police can interview him.

[960] I don't know what that means if he's like, oh well, thanks everybody, thanks for pulling me over, great to see you, and just drives away.

[961] I'm not sure, or if they meant the neighborhood.

[962] Sounds like the neighborhood, right?

[963] It's just weird, because if you've got him there and he's driving so maybe they just had the information that it was that truck and they didn't put it together until later.

[964] But I looked it up, Greenwich, in the year 2000, Greenwich was the third wealthiest town in Connecticut.

[965] So he's just going East Coast.

[966] Now he's going to do this on the East Coast.

[967] Big money.

[968] Yeah.

[969] So he rents a post office box in Greenwich under the name Christopher C Crow, C, C, C. He loves the C. He does.

[970] He literally walked into the Indian High School.

[971] Harbor Yacht Club like he owned the place.

[972] So this is a rich town that has a yacht club and he rolled up on in, here's how he was described.

[973] He looked like he walked out of a magazine.

[974] He always had his burberry winter coat, burberry umbrella, very fine cotton buttoned down white shirts with CCC monogrammed on the pockets for Christopher Chichester Crow.

[975] Always pristine, always perfect.

[976] Sounds like what you wear, whenever you go out.

[977] Yep.

[978] I do have my button down.

[979] K. L .K. shirt on now.

[980] I'm so hot.

[981] Someone else said he's talking to you as if he's smarter, wealthier, more connected, more everything than you, no matter who you are.

[982] Fuck you.

[983] So he's just playing the rich game and beating them at the rich game.

[984] Yeah.

[985] Because I think Thirst and Hald the third was the richest man on the planet.

[986] So if that's who he is, he's right.

[987] Yeah.

[988] he sleeps with a woman he so that basically his in and in greenwich was this yacht club okay he he starts sleeping with a woman who ends up getting him this really high level job um in town at a broker dealer firm i don't know what that is i don't either i cut my eyes were skipping over the part where it got into like finance but basically a huge finance job okay um you have to take two tests to do this job one called the series seven and one calls the series 63 there's seven it's seven hours of questions holy shit and he passed it what the shit so he's not he's a very very very very intelligent person so now you know the brain that's being applied to conning people fair a memorizer an absorber of personalities and information and the kind of person that will tell you the perfect lie yeah he's lord mount baton's nephew he's not anybody's son he's there's nothing direct um so all right so he's he stays at this job for two years but he's super um people don't at first it's interesting that they have this royalty working there after two years they're sick of hearing him talk and he did the ultimate uh wrong move which was the boss the guy that hired him who was the president of the company wanted to access his own computer and Chris wouldn't tell him how to do it because he thought if I'm the only one that knows how to do it and you don't know I will never get fired instead the guy in charge was like get the fuck out of here and somebody else is going to teach me how to get into my computer weird well from there he gets a better job oh my god so he gets fired from that job and then he gets hired at a place called Nico I don't it's another one of these like wall street jobs yeah Karen this is not our universe it i'm not interested in it i don't like it nope i don't care yeah but essentially he does great there too for a couple years but he a couple people were on to him this is all in the documentary because he would ask he'd ask a question like um do you have you ever sold one of these and the guy that he asked the question to is in the documentary who's like that'd be like asking a dentist do you know what a bicusp it is like it's one of the basics so that guy was like I was pretty sure something was going on.

[989] Yeah.

[990] Um, and then, of course, by the end, everyone's just, he's bragging and he's, you know, an asshole to everybody.

[991] Um, so he gets fired from there.

[992] Uh, then, um, he goes to another company, a bigger company.

[993] So he gets a better job.

[994] Each firing, he just is failing upwards.

[995] Um, but this is the job where they finally, uh, do a background check.

[996] Oh, no, sorry, two years after, he got dismissed from the first place they finally look him up.

[997] They'd run his social security number and the social security number that he gave was David Berkowitz's the son of Sam.

[998] Shut the fuck up.

[999] That is the coolest part.

[1000] It's amazing.

[1001] So it's kind of like saying if you check my shit, go fuck yourself.

[1002] But no one ever did until after he left.

[1003] Holy shit, that's cool.

[1004] It's crazy.

[1005] So in this third job someone at the third job finally looks into his background while he still works there and finds out that he is a person of interest in a missing person's case in California how did that guy feel when he saw that I mean probably nervous but stoked yeah excited and then hungry because it was right before last who knows so the Greenwich police and the Connecticut State police show up at this job but that day Christopher Chichester No sorry Christopher Crowe now Christopher Crow didn't show up for work that day Because he was on to them He knew But he called in to say he needed time off Because his parents had been kidnapped In either Pakistan or Japan But just say you don't feel well Well and also that's where your lies are getting a bit big Yeah Like pick one Yeah It's Pakistan Yeah Or you have a hangover Yeah Or you're yeah you broke one of your teeth and you're out for a couple days.

[1006] Your bicuspid.

[1007] How about your bicuspic?

[1008] Um, so he disappears from Greenwich, Connecticut.

[1009] And he reappears in New York City in 1992.

[1010] And where does he go?

[1011] Where did John List go when he had to start all over in a new town?

[1012] The church.

[1013] Church.

[1014] Church.

[1015] Church.

[1016] You show, say with me church.

[1017] Church.

[1018] You show up a church with your song and dance.

[1019] Yeah.

[1020] And you have a built in community of people who are going to trust you.

[1021] Totally.

[1022] Keep your eyes peeled, churchies.

[1023] So he rolls up, this is now when he has...

[1024] Keep your eyes peeled, churchy.

[1025] I say that as if that's something that's important.

[1026] This is now when he's become Clark Rockefeller.

[1027] So he's in New York City and he's introducing himself as a Rockefeller.

[1028] That seems like something you'd want to introduce yourself anywhere but in New York City.

[1029] Well, but here's the thing.

[1030] He knows the difference.

[1031] So he specifies to these people of this church that he is from the Percy Rockefeller's side, not John D. John D. is the one that he's crazy rich.

[1032] Percy still is super rich, but not John D. level.

[1033] So he, he always goes right under.

[1034] Yeah.

[1035] You know, he goes in with the claim that's right.

[1036] Believable enough.

[1037] Yeah.

[1038] We're still talking millions of dollars.

[1039] Crazy old American blue blood money.

[1040] It still would impress people like my mom.

[1041] Oh, he's a Rockefeller, you know.

[1042] My grandmother used to say, like, she'd go pick that penny up off the floor we're not the Rockefellers.

[1043] Totally.

[1044] That was like a total grandma saying.

[1045] She also said a lot of racist stuff that I won't repeat.

[1046] So don't listen to her.

[1047] She was a good person at heart.

[1048] It was just, there times.

[1049] Make America great again.

[1050] All right.

[1051] He claimed to have gone to Yale, like when he was 14.

[1052] He had a Yale scarf with the blue stripes.

[1053] He said he had one of the, the J -boats from his grandparents, which was a classic 30s sailing yacht.

[1054] Yeah, I do too.

[1055] Yeah, don't we all?

[1056] So basically what he learned is that if you joined private clubs in a big city, and they're all like clubs no one's ever even heard of, the Lodos and stuff like that where I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm clearly as working classes you can get.

[1057] We'll never be.

[1058] No more close.

[1059] We'll never be asked to.

[1060] No, they're not going to ask us.

[1061] No. I don't think so.

[1062] But this is where the Vanderbilts and the Whitney's and the Roosevelt's and the Rockefellers, they've all been socializing since the 1800s.

[1063] So he learns the kind of language of private clubs and those people.

[1064] And then all of his lives become believable because he's speaking their language.

[1065] Saying this stupid shit that they all say to each other over cucumber sandwiches.

[1066] What do they say?

[1067] I wonder.

[1068] It's all whispering about cash.

[1069] Yeah.

[1070] Transactions.

[1071] Lots of trend words.

[1072] Bonds.

[1073] Bonds.

[1074] Bonds.

[1075] War bonds.

[1076] Bonds.

[1077] Polio.

[1078] Polio.

[1079] Polo.

[1080] Polo.

[1081] I meant polio.

[1082] You meant the disease.

[1083] Because Roosevelt had that.

[1084] Yeah.

[1085] You got to talk about it.

[1086] Where am I?

[1087] So, oh, sorry, I lost my place.

[1088] And I'm hallucinating from the heat.

[1089] I'm so sorry.

[1090] It's so much in here.

[1091] There's nothing you can do.

[1092] do.

[1093] So, oh, I was on the totally wrong page.

[1094] I tried to do that scrolling thing that I do.

[1095] All right.

[1096] So okay, so he marry, in 1995, he marries a woman that he met through St. Thomas Church, this church that he went to.

[1097] And she was a Harvard MBA who rose to be one of the youngest partners in history at McKinsey.

[1098] I don't know what that is.

[1099] Law firm?

[1100] Probably.

[1101] She had a $2 million salary.

[1102] She was like a legendary businesswoman.

[1103] Fuck, man. He meets her church.

[1104] They hit it off and they get married.

[1105] He has a way with the ladies.

[1106] Yeah.

[1107] He explains to her that none of his family is going to be at the wedding because there had been an argument and he had disinvited all of them.

[1108] So he has no family there.

[1109] Her flag.

[1110] But he marries into her family and they have a child named Ray, which I actually like that name for a girl.

[1111] Ray.

[1112] Ray.

[1113] R -E -I -G -H.

[1114] Oh.

[1115] That's cute.

[1116] He nicknamed her Snooks.

[1117] Snooks.

[1118] Um, which may have been something Thursday and how the third called his wife.

[1119] Snux, yeah.

[1120] He'd insisted on raising her and educating her himself.

[1121] I would love to meet and talk to her.

[1122] Oh my God.

[1123] She's the coolest.

[1124] Um, so anyway, they ultimately get divorced and she, the wife, has to pay him $800 ,000 in alimony and he won the white the, but she sorry, she won the right to raise Ray in London.

[1125] So in 2008, a court supervised visit in Boston Rockefeller kidnaps Ray.

[1126] Oh no. So she's seven years old.

[1127] He's meeting up with Ray and the court appointed like social worker basically and he runs up pushes that woman over grabs the little girl and jumps into a car and drives away the social worker actually ran after and grabbed onto the back bumper of the car for like a little bit trying to do something about it but don't worry he was he lived for this little girl he just wanted her in his life he wasn't going to harm her in anyway I know that everyone in this document says it like they would never he worshipped her and and he she was everything to him and they and he got caught two weeks later okay so the but there was he he had set up a new identity um in baltimore that's where he was going to become chip smith a professional yacht captain and catamaran designer but he he got caught immediately he was um in 2009 he was convicted and sentenced to four to five years for abducting his daughter and two to three years for the assault on the social worker who did get injured by that SUV that he had waiting but um we'll circle back around now because in 1994 um the new owners of the so huss's house in san marino were digging to build a new pool uh oh and they found two bodies deep, deep underneath the ground in the backyard at the Sohuss's house.

[1128] And it was, the family members said the bones matched Jonathan Sohuss's general description, but he was adopted.

[1129] So they couldn't do a family DNA match.

[1130] So she adopts this kid and he's this like great nerd.

[1131] She loves him so much.

[1132] But she's kind of a boozer.

[1133] And then he takes off.

[1134] He finds love in a six -foot redhead, and they're kind of this mismatched couple that are making it happen, and then...

[1135] She thinks he just leaves her.

[1136] Yes.

[1137] Oh, that's the saddest thing I've ever heard.

[1138] The...

[1139] So, the forensic evidence showed that the victim, who is Jonathan, had been struck in the head two times with a rounded blunt object, then stabbed six times.

[1140] Holy shit.

[1141] His body had been cut into three parts, and the body...

[1142] parts had been put into book bags from the University of Wisconsin and from USC where Chris Chicheng Clark all these people he had actually sat in on film classes never registered as a student but he used to go to USC and go to classes he just wasn't actually a student.

[1143] Wow.

[1144] And so that circumstantial evidence combined with the fact that he was arrested driving Jonathan's truck in Greenwich basically convicted him of murder.

[1145] Sorry, there was only one body buried in the backyard.

[1146] They never found Linda.

[1147] Linda.

[1148] Where do you think she is?

[1149] Well, the police suspect that Clark had an affair with Linda.

[1150] Oh, no. Because basically he, Clark thought he was in with Dedi and thought that he was going to get her money and get the house and be in San Marino and, like, have his life.

[1151] Yeah.

[1152] And then Jonathan and Linda were basically what we're standing in the way of that.

[1153] And he thought, you know, I'll get, this is just this crazy old drunk lady.

[1154] I'm going to get her to sign everything over to me. And then I'm going to have the life I want.

[1155] And then Linda and Jonathan are just like, you need to move out of here.

[1156] And basically that's where it started.

[1157] So he, the theory is that he tried to break them up as a couple.

[1158] And then he murdered Jonathan.

[1159] So Linda might be out in the world.

[1160] they think she's dead yeah she's dead yeah they just think that he brought the body somewhere else that's so sad i believe yeah um he was charged with jonathan's murder uh any and the trial was in april 2013 and he was convicted of first degree murder uh and he's now in some weird jail and ironwood jail in blithe california wow can i see a photo of him yeah i want to see him like a mugshot it's so funny because when they talk about like that he's good looking and stuff or that he had away with the ladies nope well let's see was he hot i mean to each his own oh my god he's like a nerd he's well and also when you see him talking it's even worse he's got no mouth because he kind of talks like this it's like somebody in a bad like mustard commercial where you're like what why would you talk like that he looks like he is a character in the Simpsons.

[1161] Yeah.

[1162] Like, oh no, where's his mouth?

[1163] He's just kind of, um, you know, I'm sure he was insecure as a teen.

[1164] Sure.

[1165] And all of that, plus being really smart, you know?

[1166] Yeah.

[1167] Just made up for it.

[1168] I don't see him being a ladies man, but good for him.

[1169] It's all in the brains, brains, brains, brains.

[1170] Brains, brains.

[1171] Brains, brains.

[1172] Well, that's fucking sad.

[1173] Yeah.

[1174] But it's playful.

[1175] it's not as dark but then it kind of is actually he like went and had you know the crazy rich man's life and it actually worked for a little while but let's take a cue from him and start living our lives okay not lies no more lies no more lies no more drama um let's be as confident as him okay and as a nerdy as the guy he killed and i don't know and as rich as someone who lives in San Marino that's that I like I would love to live in San Marino would you well yeah that's like a nice house I mean I would need to be constantly making money so you could just pay those property taxes sounds so exhausting they have to work at like a hedge fund thing yeah then you have to be the kind of person that's like I need the better I need the Louis Vuitton version of this Isn't it word that you have to spend all that stupid money and make people think you're rich to make money and get rich?

[1176] It's dumb.

[1177] I'm good.

[1178] Yes.

[1179] No, I'm fine.

[1180] I'm lazy.

[1181] I'm not interested in most of that stuff.

[1182] Anyway, I just want the relief of not having debt.

[1183] Yeah.

[1184] But being rich, I don't think it really adds up to it.

[1185] I don't think it fills the hole that people are so convinced it's going to give.

[1186] I want enough money that I don't have to wonder when my next money.

[1187] is coming from yeah and you know maybe in five years but not really yeah but how much is that i don't know well and also you know i heard from the great jerry seinfeld himself who said that he heard money that there was some study that they did money doesn't make you happy money never makes people happy it's human connection that makes people happy which i found very powerful coming from the richest man on the face of the earth where obviously I was like yeah this must be you must have had some stake in this because what you're saying to me right now is that your money doesn't make you that happy yeah so you're looking trying to find out what does and it's human connection yeah um I also heard that like there's you if people are happy and to at a certain amount of money and then anything over that that decreases your happiness decreases how many lottery winners go buck wild bananas crazy and kind of never come back one point five million is all I need is that all you need yeah it's not a lot it's really not today's standards no really it's you couldn't buy a house for that in Los Angeles it's not enough no you can't live here with that much fuck okay I want more than that then kick it up let's kick it up to the six seven area well when that rich person gets a jet and comes to show it comes to see us in Harmontown they can tell us his money full of envelope I was I was hoping it would be John Travolta flying in from Florida.

[1188] That's what I pictured in my mind.

[1189] That's where he has his house with the airplane hanger right outside.

[1190] Damn.

[1191] You've seen it.

[1192] Yeah.

[1193] Cool.

[1194] Anything else?

[1195] I have a hometown murder, but it's kind of depressing too, so I don't know if maybe it'll be just like not worth it.

[1196] Didn't you do a hometown murder at the end of yours?

[1197] I did.

[1198] Yeah, forget it.

[1199] Yeah.

[1200] And it perfectly laid right in.

[1201] It did, didn't it?

[1202] Where Elvis came out right As you were ending Because he was like We should thank Stephen Yeah, thank you Stephen Our beautiful engineer Who gave us microphone Yeah They're beautiful Thank you We've been killing it We appreciate You for all your help Elvis is sitting there waiting Elvis, it's your big chance Oh okay Can we try and do this?

[1203] Do we do it before or after we say?

[1204] Elvis, you want a cookie?

[1205] You want a cookie?

[1206] You want to see your microphone We usually do it after because stay sexy.

[1207] Don't get murdered.

[1208] Elvis cookie.