#1129 - Tom Papa

[0] young james ran along five four we can do it one we can do it tom papa is a motherfucker i'm a man of letters now you're an author i'm an author i'm an author i've always uh admired that and secretly wish that i had not even so secretly wish that i had the discipline to write a book you do have the discipline you just have to focus it on that you can do it how long do it take you to write this About two years?

[1] That's too long.

[2] I don't got that kind of time.

[3] You can do it shorter.

[4] Oh, okay, like a little pamphlet?

[5] Yeah, just throw a flyer.

[6] Just make a flyer.

[7] This is all I can do.

[8] How long before you started writing the book, did you think about writing the book?

[9] I've always kind of wanted to write a book.

[10] Did you have a book deal?

[11] No, well, yeah, on this one.

[12] I had pitched doing a book, I don't know, like six years ago, pretty much the same concept, and no one was into it.

[13] And then a couple of years ago, two, three years ago, a publisher contacted my agent or whatever, and they had interest.

[14] So we made a book deal.

[15] And that changes everything because now someone's waiting for you.

[16] Yeah.

[17] You know, you've got to turn stuff in and they make books and they're probably smart.

[18] You don't want to seem like an idiot Did you have an editor that like went over your stuff And said this is too long This is too short Yeah they were pretty Great They were pretty They just left the material alone There was a couple little things Where they're like you know You're repeating something or That but mostly it was Grammar kind of things Do you want to say it like this Right This isn't technically grammatically correct But would you know Typos Right That kind of stuff They were pretty hands off about the actual material.

[19] And is it a book of essays?

[20] Is it your life story?

[21] What is it?

[22] It's all on family.

[23] It's called Your Dad Stole My Rake and other family dilemmas.

[24] And it's broken down by everyone in your family.

[25] Like the basic thing is as a comedian, I've been writing about family and looking at all everyone's families for so long.

[26] So I'm going to write about all of them.

[27] So it's moms, dads, cousins, aunts, uncles, all broken down in chapters like that.

[28] and so I talk a little bit about my family and then I just talk about funny essays about just life in general like going on family vacations or Why are you eating your shirt?

[29] What's going on there?

[30] I don't know exactly There's a really cool photographer Sam Jones who's...

[31] And you just decided to get wacky?

[32] He just, uh, this guy is like this amazing photographer who's just done like Clooney and Damon and all these people and I asked him if he would help and when I showed up we just taking some regular shots and he's like I have this idea and he just brought out this giant shirt and put a tie on it and uh and just shot it and came up pretty funny it looked like dilbert yeah or beaker I was just trying to figure out what you're doing that I guess I guess what you're doing there is get people to try to figure out what you're doing there yeah they stare at and they're like maybe if I buy the book I'll figure it out I'll understand the puzzle is deep inside ooh it's just being goofy yeah when you write a book you have to think man someone could be reading this 30 years from now 50 years from now that is as comedians you write something in the morning and you bring it on stage they tell you if it's funny or not you know what you're working with you go back and forth this is like it's permanent and no one gets to review it until it's done so the nerve -wracking part of it was like okay it's done i'm pretty proud of it i've like edited it like crazy i've worked on it for a long will people think it's okay will they not think it's hack well they think it's good well is the writing okay all that other stuff and it's been out now for a week and uh the review i can tell the reviews are good like the people are reviewing it and writing about it and calling and just people just randomly and it's i'm over the hurdle the anxiety of is this a good that's nerve -wracking is over yeah people like it it's funny and it's people are saying i can write so that is huge it's just calm me down completely because you know you know like you said for 30 years whatever everybody's like takes a dump on it well there's some that are really fucking bad yeah i mean some comics someone should have just walked in while they're writing and grabbed them and said hey you got this is you're doing something terrible for your future this is going for a long time well people are going to refer to this forever catch people in these like really self -righteous defensive modes and they're writing things down and maybe like five years from now they'd be like what the fuck was I thinking yeah they're in the middle of writing it and I've read some some shit really oh my god really yeah yeah just horrible stuff yeah I uh no I'm I'm I'm relieved not excited I'm just relieved like oh okay it's good it was good I thought it was good I hoped it was good my editor said it's good people are saying that they're laughing when they're reading it like editors who don't normally say that kind of stuff so how do you balance out writing book writing with writing stand -down like how do you uh how do you divide your time it was um it was tough you stand up whenever i'm working on something else stand -up kind of i work on it at night you know and the book was i got into this rhythm of going in every morning get up at seven going with my coffee and sit there and that was book time until noon I would try and just, just work on that and make it, but that wasn't for two years.

[33] That was like the last, you know, year to eight months kind of thing.

[34] Before that, it's a little looser.

[35] I'm trying to get it done and stuff, but that real discipline of like coming in every morning, sitting down, and seven days a week, just writing, just writing, just writing, just writing.

[36] Wherever I was, whatever I was doing, I had to make sure that I had that time.

[37] If I'm on a plane, if I'm in a hotel, if I'm on the road.

[38] I was just writing the thing all the time.

[39] It just became, because, you know, the biggest challenge for me, and I think a lot of writers, is that you judge yourself as you go.

[40] You're like, is this good?

[41] Is it my da -da -da -da.

[42] But you have to just get it down and know that it's bad.

[43] Just get it down.

[44] I want to write this chapter on crazy ants.

[45] So I'm just going to write it and spit it out.

[46] And then I'm going to go to work on it, like a bit, you know, like stand -up.

[47] And just go back and just go back and just.

[48] just start editing and peeling back and peeling back and how what program were you using when you're doing this i did it all on word like yourself word and have you ever seen scrivener do you know what scrivener yeah scrivener um i did my last special on scrivener oh yeah it was the first time i've used it for uh for writing stand -up and what's good about it is on the left -hand side you have uh like all of your different subjects yeah and you click on each subject and like there'll be a whole column I felt like I had the title, Strange Times, and then the left -hand side.

[49] This is what it looks like when you're looking at the cork board.

[50] Oh, yeah.

[51] So the cork board is one aspect of it where you have these little cards, like index cards, and you set these index cards up, and you write all the different things on the index cards.

[52] But you can organize it.

[53] Outside of the index cards, there's also on, like, each index, the index, the cork board, it corresponds to each individual.

[54] subject like say it's like say if I'm doing a bid on desks right so I have desks on the left hand side and then I'll write out all the stuff on desks but there's also a corkboard tab right and then so I have all the different things to make sure that I covered all the notes oh that's good dude I like it a lot yeah I'm gonna try that what I like a lot this is not really showing why I like it uh -huh why I like it is because you can have you can move all those little chapters around and move all the bits around like for stand -up.

[55] Oh, that's great.

[56] Yeah.

[57] That's really good.

[58] The organizing, it gets so in your head.

[59] It just starts bogging you down.

[60] But the good thing about this was that it was essays.

[61] So each one's like four or five pages, right?

[62] So I would just be like literally just open up the file and go, dads.

[63] All right, I'm going to go to work on this one.

[64] Dad, no gifts for dad.

[65] And then just, boom, just edit that.

[66] put it away going on the next one you know just i could just bounce it i didn't what i'm trying to say is i didn't have to keep track like a novel right i didn't have 300 pages of flow you know they were all just hits so it was kind of similar to stand up that way you know like i could just go to work on them but it's fascinating i i really loved it like i've have friends that have written books like Colin Quinn came and did a book event with me a couple weeks ago and he's like and he wrote a book he's like i'll never do it again Again, I just hated it.

[67] I couldn't stand it.

[68] I hate it.

[69] And he's a prolific guy.

[70] He writes a lot for his act.

[71] I mean, those is one -man show.

[72] He's always writing.

[73] One -man show on U .S. history.

[74] Yeah, the guy writes a lot.

[75] But the writing for the book drove him crazy.

[76] I really loved it.

[77] I couldn't believe that you could look at a five -page essay and find something wrong with it every time you looked at it.

[78] Every time.

[79] Why am I saying this?

[80] They know this.

[81] Why do I have to say he sat down at the table and ate his breakfast?

[82] He ate his breakfast.

[83] You know, like you could just peel stuff away all the time and get it as, as direct as possible.

[84] And I started to really just love that.

[85] Jordan Peterson told me he wrote his first book, and it took him 15 years, because he went over every single line, every single thing, like a critic, trying to find fault in everything that he did.

[86] Wow.

[87] Until he felt like he got it down.

[88] It was on the Cold War.

[89] Jeez.

[90] So he really wanted to make sure that he had the subject matter completely locked down.

[91] Yeah, that's daunting.

[92] Like, if you're dealing with something that people can fact check, people can't fact check what happened to me and putting my sister in a garbage can in fourth grade, you know what I mean?

[93] Yeah.

[94] It was family.

[95] It's all about family.

[96] It's all about, like, the joy of being with other people and the aggravations and all that kind of stuff.

[97] So it was just, and I write, you know, I have a lot of that in my act.

[98] So it was definitely in my wheelhouse.

[99] Like, I'm not writing, I'm not writing books about the Cold War.

[100] You're going to write another one?

[101] I am going to write another one.

[102] Have you started yet?

[103] No, I haven't, which is, I have a couple ideas.

[104] And the publisher wants me to write another one.

[105] Oh, already they want you to write another one?

[106] Yeah, I think...

[107] That's a good sign.

[108] Yeah, it's a good sign.

[109] We're the number one new release and family humor.

[110] Ooh.

[111] So it's like...

[112] You got any potty words in there?

[113] Mm, very little.

[114] Yeah.

[115] Very little.

[116] How many?

[117] Like 10?

[118] That would be a lot.

[119] Got any C words in there?

[120] Which one?

[121] The cunt word.

[122] Oh, my lord.

[123] Yes.

[124] There's a whole chapter.

[125] On cunts.

[126] This is the problem with family.

[127] Cunts.

[128] That's male and female.

[129] Just period.

[130] No, it's actually pretty clean.

[131] I don't know if there's, I don't know if there's anything in there.

[132] I think there might be one or two words.

[133] One or two questionable.

[134] Yeah.

[135] There might be a shit or a, yeah, I don't think so, though.

[136] It's pretty clean.

[137] Good for you.

[138] Anything in there on bread?

[139] Yes.

[140] There is.

[141] Yes.

[142] The final chapter is just eat the bread.

[143] Really?

[144] Yeah, it's called Just Eat the Bread.

[145] And it's all a chapter of basically using bread as a metaphor for just enjoy your life.

[146] Right.

[147] Don't turn it away.

[148] Don't get all balled up.

[149] Once in a while, just a little, just do it.

[150] Should I say?

[151] Segway, it's my big announcement.

[152] You got a big announcement?

[153] I have a huge Joe Rogan podcast announcement.

[154] What is it?

[155] Huge.

[156] The book is huge, and it's a great Father's Day gift, and everybody should buy it.

[157] But, as we all know from being on this show, that I am the Sultan of Sourdough.

[158] Yes.

[159] And my reputation as a baker is because of this show.

[160] Hands down.

[161] From doing your show, your fans are so awesome and started just sending pictures of of their bread.

[162] We have this non -stop relationship about bread.

[163] They show me their failures.

[164] They're constantly sending, I mean, these interactions.

[165] I'm in cities.

[166] People are bringing bread.

[167] And when I would travel, I would go and visit bakeries when I was on the road.

[168] So the big announcement is the Food Network asked me to do a show about bread and baked goods.

[169] Whoa.

[170] So I have a new show coming out on the Food Network on Labor Day called Baked with Tompapa.

[171] Wow.

[172] And I travel around kind of like a diner's driving kind of thing, but with all baked goods and meeting these amazing people that make the stuff, getting their stories, these families, these Turkish families and Italian families or whatever, and then showing all of this amazing, amazing stuff that they're making.

[173] All because of this show.

[174] Wow.

[175] I have to thank you 100%.

[176] It was a hobby of mine that I completely loved and got into, but after doing this.

[177] this it just kind of exploded and uh and now we're going to be i just finished shooting them all that's awesome yeah yeah how many did you shoot we shot eight and so where'd you go different cities new orleans new york detroit l a cleveland uh philadelphia uh new jersey northern new jersey which is where i grew up uh yeah eight different ones it's going to start in labor day it's so silly.

[178] I mean, literally, you know, how many, I've been writing scripts, I've been auditioning, I've been acting, whatever, to be on television.

[179] I start baking bread with my daughter.

[180] And now that's my show.

[181] It seems like that's the best way anyway.

[182] It's the thing that you actually enjoy and really love, you know, it's a hundred percent.

[183] You find that thing that you're really passionate about and turn that into a show rather than some sitcom that you're really not that excited about other than being on television that's exactly right like I had no I was doing this anyway yeah I didn't have any of the stress of like trying to get a show on the air like when I've written pilots and you're like I hope it go this was just so natural because it's just what I'm doing so it completely and you hear that a lot well just it's just because you come from something you love and something you do and you hear that a lot you're like well I love working in an office and having a girlfriend I'll make a show about that and know you don't not really you don't really but uh but that's this actually just it you can't force it it's just it's just organic and this one was organic did you um link up those different cities with comedy shows did you do stand -up in those cities when you were traveling i did just like pop in and neil brennan and i did a show in new orleans i did a show in cleveland when i was there just as i like pop in i didn't like promote it and do it while i was there so you're just concentrating on filming yeah i was just concentrating on filming we'd go in for like three days i'd meet like four or five different bakers and uh it was cool just you know just dealing with these people was amazing that's awesome man no one gets into baking because they're an asshole you know what i mean no one says i'm gonna bake cookies and they're an idiot fuck these people i'm gonna bake them cookies and they're gonna like it no no it's i mean it's uh food is a fascinating thing to me Because, I mean, I guess this is a good time to bring it up as any.

[184] You know, obviously, Anthony Bourdain took his life last week.

[185] And he was a friend of mine, and that was real hard.

[186] Friday was real hard.

[187] I woke up and I got a text from my friend Maynard from Tool.

[188] Maynard said so much for the Keenan versus Bordane celebrity jujitsu match.

[189] And he was like, fuck.

[190] and I was like oh no what does that mean yeah and so then I googled it and I saw it I was like oh shit man I can't fuck what yeah I just what what hung himself like what I yeah I don't how close were you did you know his demons was friends with him hung out with him yeah got fucked up with him did you get a feeling that he had that in him I didn't know that yeah but it was really weird was like he'd been saying really recently that he'd never been happier he um was talking about his girlfriend saying that he'd never been happier didn't know he could be that happy didn't know someone could make him that happy oh man i'm so terrible but who knows i mean they might have they might have broken off or who knows yeah i mean who knows i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i mean sometimes people when they say i've never been that happy you're catching them on these ups and downs you know Some people, you know, people get manic, right?

[191] I don't know if he was, but some people get manic.

[192] They get up and down.

[193] I'll tell you what, he liked to get fucked up.

[194] Yeah.

[195] You know, like, he liked to drink.

[196] Yeah.

[197] You know, and he enjoyed it.

[198] It was something that he enjoyed.

[199] Yeah.

[200] Like, we did an episode of this show.

[201] We went hunting for pheasants in Montana.

[202] Oh, yeah.

[203] And then we cooked over this campfire.

[204] He cooked.

[205] Wow.

[206] And then afterwards we drank whiskey And smoke weed And he goes deep He goes deep Where I'm sitting down I'm like I'm gonna just try to catch myself Real, the world's spinning Deep breath, deep breath He's like where's the fucking weed He's like, who else?

[207] He just kept going He just kept going Wow I knew he drank, I didn't know he smoked weed Yeah, yeah He had a heroin problem when he was younger, and he kicked it.

[208] But he didn't feel the need to just be sober.

[209] Yeah, that was kind of interesting about him.

[210] That's a thing, right?

[211] When people get sober from a drug, they feel like they have to get sober from everything.

[212] Yeah.

[213] He did not feel like that.

[214] And he, by the way, like he would drink, but when he was home, like with his kid and he's home with family, he didn't drink at all.

[215] Like he would only do that He would only do that When he would be on the road Right So he'd be home for these stretches of time And he didn't drink at all And he was Addicted to Jiu -Jitsu That was a...

[216] Oh really?

[217] Yeah, he was doing Jiu -Jitsu Like literally every day How?

[218] When I was hanging around with him He was He went We were in Montana He went to Bozeman To find a local Jiu -Jitsu club And trained with them in the morning Jeez He was trained with everybody I hardly ever did that in the road Yeah Find a place to I would just go to the gym and work out.

[219] Right.

[220] I wouldn't.

[221] But he was so into learning and getting better at Jiu -Jitsu.

[222] Do you know if he was on prescription for depression or anything like that?

[223] I do not.

[224] That's what I'm so suspicious of, like, when you heard of, like, Robin Williams and.

[225] Chris Cornell.

[226] Yeah, there's like.

[227] He was on anti -anxiety medication.

[228] Anti -anxiety medication is a big one.

[229] That stuff, like it even, you know, in their, you know, in their long list of side effects, it's always suicidal thoughts.

[230] And then if you mix it with other things like alcohol and this, and I don't know at all who was on what.

[231] But it seems, what bothers me is that it's not part of the conversation.

[232] Well, Robin is a different take because Robin had Louis body disease.

[233] He had a heart attack.

[234] He had significant issues with that.

[235] My friend, Dr. Mark Gordon, actually wrote a paper about long -term anesthesia, like when you're under, not long -term, but like, long duration for things like open heart surgery right that there's a high instance of depression afterwards and um a lot of people coming out of these big time operations where you get anesthesia for long periods of time have significant dips in their hormone levels afterwards it's very you know it's not like a free ride getting put under yeah and having your heart opened up and yeah i mean your body goes through massive trauma your body's like holy shit we just had our chest plate split open and yeah your heart gets worked on people were inside of us yeah and there's a significant um correlation in mark gordon's opinion between depression uh post surgery post surgery depression i think it's something that people need to look at he had that obviously because he did have um heart surgery for a long period of time the depression lasts after that because I know people get I always thought it was just a mental thing of like you know surviving something like I remember Letterman on a show like weeping and like bringing his staff on and stuff I was I didn't know it was a hormone thing I always thought it was just the trauma of surviving that I think it can be both I mean I'm sure I mean I'm obviously no doctor but he was close I'd say you're closer to a garbage man but he was explaining it to me yeah um the that there is an issue with this right and so robin had that and he had some serious neurological disorders yeah and um and there was there's a there's a quite a few other things too right they're also complicated yeah and then whatever medications this is the thing right like what are these medications what's gone you know you don't really don't know no but um chester from lincoln park uh he was on a shitload of things and uh he was but he was but he was very troubled he was a guy that was he had some real problem but he was also very medicated i mean look we have the highest suicide rate among middle -aged people in america than ever like the numbers are through the roof and there's also this pharmaceutical opioid crisis at the same time and i just feel like you know people are on this shit that's really affects your head and your mood and it says right in it like you know i remember I had a friend whose brother was depressed, and this was, you know, in the 80s when we were kids.

[236] And the game, lack of a better word, of trying to get the right medicine for him.

[237] Because when they prescribed the wrong one, things got out of hand.

[238] I mean, like, really dangerously out of hand.

[239] And then they finally find the right med for him, and then he kind of cruised like that.

[240] There's no, like, obvious path.

[241] Yeah.

[242] Like, the problem is it's like, say if you have some particular type of infection, they give you antibiotics.

[243] If you have, you know, poison ivy, they know what kind of cortisone cream to put on you or what have you.

[244] When you're depressed, there's just so many different factors involved in depression.

[245] There's your actual life, right?

[246] There's what's going on in your life.

[247] Like, are you taking care of your body?

[248] Are you exercising?

[249] Do you have loving relationships with your family and close friends, or do you feel distant and detached?

[250] You know, do you not have anyone in your life, like romantically?

[251] Do you not have a job that you enjoy?

[252] All those things factor into the way you feel about life.

[253] And from the time you were a kid.

[254] Sure.

[255] Your whole life.

[256] Oh, your whole life.

[257] And then on top of that, you have, like, legitimate mental illness.

[258] Right.

[259] And you have depression because your brain is not producing enough serotonin or dopamine.

[260] There's so many factors.

[261] and people try to self -medicate, and, you know, I know a lot of people try to do it with exercise.

[262] Exercise apparently seems to be as effective or more effective than most SSRIs and antidepressions.

[263] I heard that, I don't know if I'm right, but I remember hearing that whatever your body manufactures or secretes when you exercise is similar to what a lot of these drugs have in them.

[264] Well, you definitely get runners high, right?

[265] Right, yeah.

[266] Runners high, you actually, you're, runners high, I don't know the exact mechanisms involved, but it has something to do with the cannabinoid receptors.

[267] So it literally gives you a high that's similar to almost like a marijuana high.

[268] Right.

[269] Yeah, you get your euphoric.

[270] Oh, yeah, you get, like, I love it.

[271] Yeah.

[272] I love running.

[273] And just feel, even if it's not identified for me as a high, like smoking weed, my whole rest of my day is better.

[274] Like, there's a happy little thing going on that's, you know, I'm not flying, but I'm definitely not bawled up and anxious the way I was before the run.

[275] Yeah, that balled up and anxious thing, I have my own theory about that.

[276] I think the human body has physical requirements.

[277] And I think if you don't, just because of the design of it, the fact that human beings have lived for thousands and thousands of years either hunting or gathering or running away from danger or your body's like constantly in action back then.

[278] Yeah.

[279] We essentially have the same bodies as people that lived 10 ,000 years ago.

[280] Our DNA is very, very similar.

[281] Right.

[282] And I think we have all these requirements and we don't meet them.

[283] And there's so many people that just sit down all day.

[284] And that's all they do.

[285] They walk to sit down and they sit down again.

[286] And most of their time is sitting down, whether they're watching television or sitting in front of their computer.

[287] Yeah.

[288] And that shit is terrible for you.

[289] Terrible.

[290] Yeah.

[291] And you feel it.

[292] You just feel shitty.

[293] Yeah.

[294] You just feel bad.

[295] I was in, after the Bourdain news, I was traveling outside of Chicago.

[296] And it just kind of clicked in my head, like, you know, you're just thinking, whenever you have someone that inspires you, and especially if you're friends, like you were, you know, it's just, you can't get it out of your head kind of a thing.

[297] And your balled up anxiety is even worse.

[298] And I just instinctually got in, put on my running shoes, and just went for a run.

[299] I didn't want to sit and think about all of it so much.

[300] Yeah.

[301] And I just felt better.

[302] Like, I wasn't euphoric again after the run, but I was definitely better than before.

[303] Yeah.

[304] I feel like, especially when you're traveling and stuff like that.

[305] But he did jiu -jitsu all the time.

[306] See, these are puzzles.

[307] These are puzzles we can't solve.

[308] Yeah.

[309] Who knows?

[310] I don't know what was going on.

[311] Yeah.

[312] And there's no way to ask him, obviously.

[313] Yeah, when I travel.

[314] one of the first things I do whether I'm coming home or going there is work out yeah and I didn't this weekend because Friday when I got there I'd worked out Thursday so I'd worked out that day already I ran that day and then I got there Thursday night woke up Friday to that text and I was just like fuck man I didn't want to do anything I cried yeah I felt like shit I got a bunch of phone calls from some friends and then I had two shows that night I was like I just got a just got to get on the horse fire up and I was a little worried I was a little worried that I was going to be like moody or weirded out but once I got there I was fine I was with Santino and Tony Hinchcliff so those two guys are great yeah just had a fun time we talked a little bit about it and smoked a little weed nice got up there and just had some fun and the energy of that crowd I saw your Instagram of the crowd and that's such a beautiful theater that's an amazing theater you could have to it'd be tough to be depressed in doing a show there with all those fans and that thing.

[315] 3 ,700 people, yeah.

[316] Yeah, we did two shows, too.

[317] They were both great.

[318] Oh, they look killer.

[319] Chicago's an awesome town, man. Great food, great people.

[320] It's a combination of, like, a big city and, like, Midwest, like, friendly people.

[321] Yeah, yeah.

[322] And the summer becomes a totally different city, too.

[323] I was always gone my whole career in the winter.

[324] And then literally just, like, three years ago, went in the summer.

[325] I was like, oh, man, this place is amazing, the parks and the festivals.

[326] It's great even in the winter, though.

[327] I've done gigs there in December and January.

[328] Yeah.

[329] It's like they're happy to be inside.

[330] Right.

[331] Yeah, exactly.

[332] And that you came through the cold to see them.

[333] Yeah.

[334] But back to the food thing.

[335] I mean, the stories that Bourdain told through food was just, I mean, amazing.

[336] That's why he reached so many people.

[337] You could sit with that show, and he really took his time.

[338] And you really felt like you were, you had been there after he left an episode.

[339] Yeah, he made me think of food as an art form.

[340] Yeah.

[341] I never thought of as an art form before watching No Reservations, his original show.

[342] Yeah.

[343] I watched that show and I just would feel like, oh, this is not what I thought it was.

[344] I thought it was just like, oh, this guy knows how to cook yummy food.

[345] That's great.

[346] Right.

[347] But then watching his show is like, oh, this is.

[348] art like these guys are treating this like a painting or like a sculpture or something like that and they're passionate and and they're all tattooed up and weirdos right they're artists yeah they're just artists that cook that's right exactly just they might as well be making music or whatever and painting whatever it would be drawing they're artists at its best yeah you know and the same thing like within any any other art form then there's people that just crank it out and see a way to make money and you can tell there's like a difference but once you eat stuff from an artist you're spoiled because then you're like ah these people don't care as much this is technically this is lasagna but yeah this isn't the same i know it's fascinating it's it's it's interesting the approach is very um it's very contagious yeah you you watch the way they cook and you watch like their their passion for the food it makes you hungry you want to eat and you also want to try it yeah i do yeah i always want to try it always always it's fascinating you like you know i uh going around and meeting all of these bakers it's like they all got into it because there's a love there and then it's really hard work like these people work they're you know two o 'clock in the morning they're baking they're like in there like i know it sounds so uh silly but any time i'd walk into a coffee shop or a bakery or something you just see that like a whole display case filled with stuff it seems like it's always been there right and you don't really now meeting the people, these poor bastards who are making it every day.

[349] From 2 o 'clock in the morning, it's hard, hard work.

[350] And the only way it seems that they can continue to do it is because there was that initial love of it.

[351] Yeah.

[352] That deep, deep love.

[353] They learned it from their grandparents or they just went to school and figured it out and they just hooked them.

[354] And that, like, it's enough of a big bang explosion of love that they stay in it for like, you know, 10 years and make a business out of it.

[355] grandfather used to walk to get bread every day we would uh he lived on north ninth street in uh north new jersey oh yeah and uh which was at one point in time an italian community right it wasn't when he lived there when he died but um but when i was a boy we would go um we would leave his house we would walk like three or four blocks down the street to this bakery that he had been going to for probably 30 years.

[356] And these people, this was like an old Italian bakery with those white paper bags.

[357] Put the loaves in and you'd go there.

[358] They would go there every day and get Italian bread.

[359] Every day.

[360] Every day.

[361] Get fresh bread.

[362] You know, and the bread was good for about a day or two.

[363] Like if you got the second day, it was getting a little dry and stale.

[364] But if you got it that day, boy.

[365] Oh, you slice that bread.

[366] Yeah.

[367] You know, my grandmother made homemade pasta.

[368] She made, she made, she mean from scratch.

[369] Right.

[370] From, you know, flour, eggs, add the whole thing, make lasagna, make.

[371] And it was just fucking sensational.

[372] Oh, it's the best.

[373] It's the best.

[374] And, you know, there's that thing, like, when someone makes something really good in a community, it changes the community because people will walk to get it in the morning.

[375] Yeah.

[376] Like, just making something real quality.

[377] All of a sudden, it's like, it just starts attracting people.

[378] Yeah.

[379] It's fascinating.

[380] It is fascinating.

[381] Did your parents, your grandparents, come over from Italy?

[382] Yeah.

[383] They were born there?

[384] Oh, yeah?

[385] What part?

[386] Well, different parts, but Sicily and Naples.

[387] That's mine, Sicily and Naples.

[388] Yeah.

[389] That's funny.

[390] Yeah.

[391] So is Rogan, what's from?

[392] That's Irish.

[393] That's my grandfather who came from Ireland.

[394] Oh, okay.

[395] My grandfather on my father's side came from Ireland.

[396] My grandmother on my father's side came from Italy.

[397] So it was one quarter, one quarter Irish.

[398] That's funny.

[399] We were one quarter German.

[400] All the rest were Italian.

[401] Yeah.

[402] It's amazing.

[403] So did they speak Italian?

[404] Yeah.

[405] Yeah, they spoke dialect too.

[406] Oh, yeah.

[407] You didn't know what the fuck they were saying.

[408] Even if you spoke Italian.

[409] Like, if you spoke proper Italian and listened to my grandmother and my grandfather yelled at each other, you don't know what the fuck they were saying.

[410] They yelled at each other so much, too.

[411] It was so crazy.

[412] Did they really?

[413] Yeah, when I was a little kid, I'd go over the house.

[414] I'd have to hide.

[415] They would start yelling.

[416] My grandmother was late for everything Everything she ever did she was late for And my grandfather's name is Joe My family was very unoriginal My father's name was Joseph My grandfather's name is Joseph My grandmother's name is Josephine And then my name is Joseph So it's like a lot of fucking Joe's What'd you call your grandmother?

[417] Grandma.

[418] Yeah, she's grandma.

[419] But when I was over there I remember my grandmother was always yelling My grandfather was like, we got to leave, we got to leave.

[420] Don't rush me, Joe.

[421] Don't rush me. And she would get crazy.

[422] They would fucking get crazy.

[423] I was always scared of marriage.

[424] Oh, really?

[425] Yeah, it was part of the reason why I was scared.

[426] My grandparents were always yelling each other.

[427] I wanted to get the fuck away, man. That's just how they communicated back then, though.

[428] I remember my grandparents, too, like just, Charlotte.

[429] God damn, Charlotte!

[430] Like veins in their neck popping out.

[431] Well, they grew up.

[432] in the hard times, man. When my grandmother had a stroke and when they were taking care of her, they started finding these little pockets of money that she had squirled away in the house.

[433] Right.

[434] All over the house, like coffee cans with cash in it.

[435] Because during the Depression, people just, they realized like, oh, my God, it can get to a point where there's no food.

[436] Like nothing.

[437] Nothing.

[438] Yeah.

[439] And people starve to death.

[440] Like, that's really possible.

[441] And the United States going through that was far better than, like, say, Europe, post -World War II, or the Soviet Union, where, you know...

[442] It was worse there?

[443] Oh, fuck, man. People starve to death.

[444] Who knows untold how many people starve to death in the Soviet Union?

[445] Starved to death.

[446] I know this sounds selfish, but I only thought of it in terms of America.

[447] Of course.

[448] The whole time.

[449] Oh, of course.

[450] Well, Russia took it really bad, man. Russia took World War II very, very bad.

[451] And these people that grew up during that era, when my grandparents came here, my grandfather came here, I think, when he was seven, and it was during the Depression.

[452] So it was like the worst of the worst.

[453] And, you know, my grandmother was a similar age.

[454] They just had this mentality.

[455] Like, it could all go away.

[456] They had seen it.

[457] Yeah.

[458] It was burned into them.

[459] And, you know, kids today, everyone's like fucking leaving food on their plate.

[460] and no one's worrying about where it's coming from and everybody thinks they had a totally different mentality.

[461] They were scared.

[462] Big time.

[463] Yeah.

[464] I mean, they had nothing.

[465] And they would save everything, every little piece, every little something.

[466] Yep.

[467] Like tinfoil.

[468] And think about how messed up it is that they go from that.

[469] They go from the depression.

[470] They get out of it.

[471] And then you roll into World War II.

[472] Like these people, they dealt with a lot of different levels of stuff that we didn't have to deal with.

[473] Yeah.

[474] I mean, Tim Kennedy, who was a guest of mine recently, a friend of mine said something very profound.

[475] He said, hard times make tough men, easy times make weak men.

[476] Yeah.

[477] But hard men make easy times.

[478] Ah.

[479] You know?

[480] And you think about it that way.

[481] Hard times make tough men.

[482] Tough men make easy times.

[483] Easy times make weak men.

[484] Yeah.

[485] It's like a fucking gross psycho.

[486] I mean, when people are always like, kids today, these kids today don't know, well, it's because they haven't gone through.

[487] No, you can't manufacture that for them.

[488] My grandmother, this is a funny story, on 9 -11, I was in New York, I was at Newark.

[489] You don't hear that a lot, by the way.

[490] This is a funny story.

[491] 9 -11, but I was at Newark.

[492] I was flying out that day.

[493] And we watched the second plane fly into the second one.

[494] You saw it?

[495] The second one.

[496] You saw it?

[497] saw it on television no you know at newark you look right across it you were looking and you actually literally a point hit a hundred percent i was the first plane it hit what the fuck was going through your mind when you saw it hit well the first one hit on before we got there before i got there and i walked with a pilot down like through the um airport and he said yeah i think it was a cessna it was kind of crazy and um so i'm down there and i was at the at the desk and i said i was going to Chicago and I said to the woman working the thing I said do you think we're going to fly out today you know do you think we're going to actually get out and a guy yells here comes another one this man just like a businessman and we all turn and you could just see it streaking across right into the you know small the plane looked small but just and you saw insane so I sit down I just sat we just and I was sitting with an artist, a middle -aged man who was an artist.

[498] And then we heard about the Pentagon as we were sitting there.

[499] And he opened up his little art case and had all these razors in it, like razor blades and stuff from his artwork.

[500] Like how, you know, he's a commercial artist.

[501] And he's like, this is all got to change.

[502] He said, you know, people are just, they let me on the plane with this.

[503] And we're just sitting there, like, just freaked out, like calm, but freaked out.

[504] And I was calling my wife who was in New York and I woke her up and we were trying to talk and she was going to the thing and at one point the artist I was sitting with just looked at me like in my eyes like we were trying to understand what was happening he said I think we should go home now I was like yeah yeah right of course we should after sitting there for 20 minutes so I can't get back into New York I can't get back into the city time's gone by and I'm on a in a cab going up the parkway in New Jersey, and there's just dust where the towers were.

[505] And I'm like, holy shit.

[506] So I can't get in.

[507] So I go to my Nana's house who lives by Giant Stadium because she's the closest to the city.

[508] I can't get into the city, so this driver takes us over.

[509] And I get to my Nana's house, and she's so excited to see me because her grandson's visiting.

[510] And she lives alone now.

[511] my father grandfather had passed and i'm sitting in front of the tv and i'm like nana like at first i hugged her and i was like all weepy like i was shaking you know i didn't know what was happening and she's like oh it's so nice to see you get in here i visit this is so great like do you see what's happening she's like oh i know it's a crazy world and uh i sit in her little tiny uh living room den area i know you have the tv on and uh she's trying to talk to me And I'm trying to watch the television.

[512] And she, this is the World War II mentality.

[513] I'm like, yeah, man, I'm kind of avoiding talking to her.

[514] And she goes, all right, well, look, I have a bridge game, a card game with my lady friends.

[515] Here, take half of my sandwich.

[516] She reached, opened her tinfoil, gave me half of her tuna fish sandwich.

[517] She goes, you eat this.

[518] I'm going to go play cards with my friends.

[519] And we'll have dinner after.

[520] You'll be okay.

[521] And she walks out.

[522] Wow.

[523] But they were tough.

[524] They dealt with so much.

[525] I hadn't dealt with anything.

[526] She wasn't even freaking out?

[527] Not even freaking out.

[528] She's like, it's a crazy world.

[529] And she wasn't like, you know, Alzheimer's.

[530] She was just, hey, you know, shit happens.

[531] We lost a couple of buildings and a few thousand people.

[532] Here's half a sandwich.

[533] I'm going to go play bridge.

[534] I'm going to play bridge.

[535] We've got to keep moving.

[536] Tomorrow's another day.

[537] But that's how they live.

[538] Both my grandmothers are that way.

[539] Just completely like plow ahead, plow ahead.

[540] Don't get caught up thinking about everything that's happening.

[541] because there's no sense in it.

[542] We've done that before.

[543] Yeah.

[544] And you get nowhere.

[545] So let's just keep going this way.

[546] Well, having a war that affected people the way World War II did where the entire nation, not just the entire nation was involved, but the whole world was involved in this conflict to stop evil.

[547] Yeah.

[548] It was a different time.

[549] You had an evil doer.

[550] Yeah.

[551] You had a real, I mean, obviously ISIS is evil.

[552] Obviously, North Korea.

[553] there's a lot of evil in the world but it's not like this evil empire that's invading Europe and dropping bombs on people it's not the same it's not no Nazis that believe in eugenics and want to create an Aryan race and like that was putting people in camps and not stopping spreading telling people we're coming and they were the most sophisticated in terms of engineering and right like I mean they they have to this day where do you get all the fucking engineers in terms of like automobiles top end like Audi BMW there's those people were making shit for Nazis back then yeah I mean that's yeah they were co -opted by the regime do you ever see like one of Hitler's cars there's a Audi from like 1930 something that was made for Hitler yeah it's like they were designing engines yeah planes and they were super sophisticated super advanced super Super advanced.

[554] No, and you had this real, you had this real evil focus.

[555] Like, it was like, okay, the world has got to come and go get this one guy.

[556] It seemed, I don't know, I mean, I wasn't there, but it seems more black and white than the way the world is now.

[557] For sure.

[558] I mean, there was a thing called Operation Paperclip that happened, where after the war, we scooped up all these Nazi scientists secretly.

[559] And some of them were like, like Werner von Braun, the guy who was in charge of NASA, he was a Nazi.

[560] Really?

[561] A hundred percent.

[562] The Simon Wiesenthal Center said that if he was alive today, they would prosecute him for crimes against humanity.

[563] And he was the head of NASA?

[564] He was the head of NASA.

[565] Oh, geez.

[566] Yeah, they took monsters.

[567] Wow.

[568] And they brought those monsters over here, and those monsters helped us make the Apollo rockets.

[569] Jeez.

[570] Yeah.

[571] And then some of the monsters went to Soviet Union.

[572] They took some of those monsters.

[573] God.

[574] Those were, I mean, there's no reason to whitewash that either.

[575] Those were real monsters.

[576] They were real.

[577] Like, they hung the five.

[578] slowest Jews every day in front of the rocket factory in Berlin where Werner von Braun was making rockets for the Nazis.

[579] Oh my God.

[580] Yeah.

[581] They had these Jews that were slaves that worked as I mean there's people that were alive today that have those tattoos in their arms.

[582] Right.

[583] That talked about meeting him there and seeing him and they they would hang the slowest workers.

[584] Oh my God.

[585] Yeah.

[586] In the front of the factory to let you know.

[587] And this guy just keeps going to work.

[588] Mm -hmm.

[589] Doesn't split.

[590] Doesn't leave the country.

[591] What could you do?

[592] And then in Nazi Germany?

[593] Yeah, you know.

[594] How the fuck could you get out?

[595] You were a slave?

[596] No, not the Jews.

[597] Barron, the guys who were working for the company.

[598] The guys who were working for the company.

[599] Like to see the people being hung and still hang in there.

[600] They were Nazis.

[601] I mean, he was a Nazi.

[602] They were all in.

[603] Yeah, I mean, whether or not he agreed with the ideology wholeheartedly, I mean, I didn't have a conversation with him.

[604] I don't know if he was doing it for pragmatic purposes.

[605] He was frightened or whatever.

[606] Yeah, but...

[607] Get a disguise, get out of there.

[608] I don't think they could.

[609] You know, one of those glasses with the mustaches.

[610] Does that work?

[611] Yeah, you go to the airport, you get on a flight, come to the...

[612] You take it off, they're like, oh, it's the NASA guy.

[613] Well, there's like a...

[614] There was a slow slide, I'm sure, into that.

[615] I mean, the...

[616] Yeah.

[617] Well, it wasn't that slow, but from World War I to World War II as it escalated, I think it just got to this point where they're like, my god like what are we doing when they started having concentration camps and killing all these jews god terrifying yeah and those so we took a lot of those guys brought them over here they worked for work for the u .s government man oh man i have a 67 vaux wagon little beetle sweet little car sweet little car it's like a little tank i know but it's solid yeah and uh yeah you can't get around every time of minute you think you know this was the people's car this was the yeah this was the early Nazi Germany, Hitler at the plants, you know, being very proud about this car and stuff.

[618] Well, here's a good way of looking at it, too.

[619] You have a 67, right?

[620] That's like if I had a 1998 car that was produced by Nazis.

[621] What do you mean in 98?

[622] Because it's 20 years old.

[623] 20 years from 67 to 47.

[624] Right, right.

[625] Literally, it's that era.

[626] Yeah.

[627] I mean, it's so close.

[628] So close.

[629] 20 years.

[630] Yeah, that's nothing.

[631] That's nothing.

[632] God, yeah.

[633] It's really close.

[634] Yeah, when you think about it that way.

[635] Yeah.

[636] That car is 20 years removed from Hitler being in power.

[637] Did you literally, did you do that randomly?

[638] Google that's literally, because that's my car.

[639] Oh, really?

[640] My car is literally.

[641] That is your actual car?

[642] That color, different wheel, different hubcaps now.

[643] But, I mean, to a T. My friend Jimmy Lawless had one of those when we were in high school.

[644] It was so light.

[645] It was crazy.

[646] So great.

[647] He had a tiny -ass little engine in the back.

[648] He's got a little four -cylinder.

[649] That's the thing.

[650] When you see this little beetle, you don't think Nazis?

[651] You think, bim -bimp!

[652] Do you think it's cute?

[653] Yeah.

[654] Oh, they're adorable.

[655] Have you seen what they do?

[656] They take an older 9 -11 engine and put them in these things?

[657] Yes.

[658] Make them fast?

[659] I know.

[660] They do that with the buses, too.

[661] But you look how little those fucking tires are.

[662] I know.

[663] I mean, that thing ain't got any traction.

[664] No, going around turns with that thing.

[665] It's like, hey, here we go.

[666] They were smart back then, though, with their engineering, they put the weight of the engine in the back.

[667] Yeah.

[668] I mean, it has such a different effect.

[669] It's kind of amazing to look at all automobile manufacturing in the 30s.

[670] Before the war come, like, there was enough metal for everybody.

[671] There was enough ingenuity.

[672] The French car.

[673] The design is so amazing.

[674] There was a real moment of inspiration and create.

[675] And then the war came into, like, all the resources and all the people and everything got dampened down.

[676] But, man, they were flying in the 30s.

[677] Yeah.

[678] What's interesting, though, is there was another resurgence in the 60s, like, especially in America.

[679] American cars in the 60s were fucking amazing.

[680] Yeah.

[681] And then the gas crisis got them.

[682] Ah, right.

[683] The 70s, they were dog shit.

[684] Yeah, went terrible.

[685] So bad.

[686] They're so useless.

[687] Oh, my mom had a pinto.

[688] Yeah.

[689] It was a bad car.

[690] But, like, I'm a muscle.

[691] car fan right yeah like for me the golden era was like 1960s to somewhere around 71 you got the last of the great cars like 71 barracuda still pretty badass right but then 72 starts to look little shitty 73s yeah once you get to 75 they're dog shit 76 but by the time 1980 rolls around just fucking like those things on fire because of the gas well it's the gas crisis came they started making cars cheaper and they were just lighter They tried to make them more fuel efficient.

[692] And something happened to the way they look.

[693] Yeah, the design.

[694] They just started looking like shit.

[695] Yeah.

[696] Like, look at that.

[697] That's a 79 Mustang.

[698] It's terrible.

[699] No, now I want you to, so this is a 1979.

[700] Look at this piece of shit.

[701] Now I want you to Google 1969 Mach 1.

[702] Get ready for this motherfucker.

[703] 1969 Mach 1.

[704] Boom, son.

[705] Click on that.

[706] black one right there.

[707] Click on that.

[708] Come the fuck on.

[709] How do you go from that?

[710] Yeah.

[711] How do you go from that and 10 years later you have that boxy piece of shit?

[712] Look at that red one in the upper right hand corner.

[713] Man, that looks like it should come with Steve McQueen in it.

[714] Oh, good, googly, moogly, look at that thing.

[715] What a fucking car that is.

[716] God damn.

[717] If that doesn't get your dick hard, go to a doctor.

[718] Comes with Steve McQueen and a naked gal on the back.

[719] Queen at a 68.

[720] Go 1968 Steve McQueen Mustang.

[721] It was a green one.

[722] Yeah, there is.

[723] Boom.

[724] Look at that.

[725] Come on, man. What did they do?

[726] Fuck.

[727] That's more than the gas.

[728] That's some bad...

[729] Something happened in the company.

[730] Something happened with life.

[731] Yeah, something happened in Ford.

[732] Look how gorgeous that is.

[733] God.

[734] I mean, that is a fucking work of art. There's the lines on that thing.

[735] Look up a...

[736] 1976 Toyota Corolla What do you want to do that yourself?

[737] I want to show you what a badass vehicle I was driving around.

[738] Oh.

[739] Yeah, that yellow one.

[740] Ooh, baby.

[741] Yeah, mine was baby shit orange.

[742] Here's a thing.

[743] That thing would start up every day.

[744] Yes, 100%.

[745] That's the difference.

[746] It might look like a piece of shit, and it most certainly does.

[747] That was it.

[748] That was the color, baby shit orange.

[749] And I put a racing stripe along the side.

[750] Did you really?

[751] And I had a horn in it that played 200 different tunes.

[752] Really?

[753] Oh, like Deuce a Hazard style?

[754] Or happy birthday.

[755] Yeah.

[756] I had everything.

[757] I had a CB in it.

[758] Boy.

[759] Contact my friends on my CB.

[760] You had a CB?

[761] We're going to the dairy queen.

[762] Over.

[763] Did your friends have CBs too?

[764] Yeah.

[765] Shouting out to the abyss.

[766] No. We had like three friends with CVs because he had no phones.

[767] That's hilarious.

[768] Is there a party?

[769] I'm not sure.

[770] going to the dairy queen okay get me a butterfinger blizzard be there in a minute explain that to me how do you choose what channel you're on uh you just choose you just all we all knew we're on channel you know four or whatever how many channels are there uh not that many actually so how close do you have to be um like 10 miles so within 10 miles you could use it yeah we'd and that's all you didn't everybody have that's all you're doing is back then as they weren't thinking i had a Toyota corolla with a horn that played 200 songs I was into it a curve you were having a curve i was having a blast i was so happy to be out of the house but isn't that amazing like i'm thinking about this now like how often people use cell phones and such what what was people thinking back then like why didn't they get cbs on their cars i don't know it's a good question why wouldn't everybody have one i don't know and it especially then it was like the big trucking era it was remember convoy dude smoking the bandit big convoy yeah smoking the bandit had it Come on.

[771] I was like, come on.

[772] Smokey and the Bandit had it in his Transam, right?

[773] Yeah, that's right.

[774] They were talking to each other.

[775] What year was that?

[776] I think he had a 79 Transam.

[777] Yeah, I was going to put it at 78.

[778] It says that CBs exploded in the 70s when the oil crisis caused the miles per hour on the highways to go down on 55, and truckers started to tell each other where the best gas prices were.

[779] Like a network started of people using CBs.

[780] Okay, rubber duck.

[781] That's funny, because I would have.

[782] thought that they were exploded because they were using them to tell each other where the cops were.

[783] Yeah, like Smokey in the Bandit.

[784] Yeah, dude, when I was in high school, it was 55 miles per hour as speed limit, which is just fucking torture.

[785] That's torture.

[786] What are you doing to people?

[787] Who do you think you are telling people to go 55 miles on the highway?

[788] On a highway?

[789] Yeah, and with a 400 horsepower engine.

[790] Yeah, with that Steve McQueen car.

[791] Yeah, what in the fuck is that all about?

[792] In my Toyota Corolla, it was just fast enough.

[793] What are you saying, Jen?

[794] And the speed traps was, like, the third thing that they helped each other out with.

[795] Yeah, I would imagine that would be a big one.

[796] I mean, that's what Waze is pretty good for that.

[797] Ways is like, police spotted ahead.

[798] Right.

[799] Oh, Ways is a snitch.

[800] Yeah.

[801] They blocked the freeways, too, in protest of the lower speed limits.

[802] Did you remember that?

[803] I remember that.

[804] Who did that?

[805] The truck truckers did?

[806] Well, that didn't help.

[807] You're fucking idiots.

[808] You're blocking yourself, you stupid fucks.

[809] Do you remember when these morons were blocking the highways?

[810] remember when people were doing that like around San Francisco that was recently Yeah like for a protest They would walk out Yeah And just walk on the highway Yeah what the fuck was that about Thank God people stopped doing that Yeah you want everyone to hate you Well it's not just that It's like you're stopping people From being able to get to a hospital You might cause people loved ones lives And they did Well that's what happened with the Governor Christie When he closed down the bridge He has a couple people died because of that Because they couldn't get to the hospital How is he not in jail for that?

[811] The guy's the worst.

[812] How's he not in jail for that?

[813] He should totally be in jail.

[814] Other people went to jail for it.

[815] That is just fucking straight corruption.

[816] Just to make that call, the audacity that you would have to have, just the balls to make that fucking call and say, shut down your bridge.

[817] That guy was so...

[818] I'm going to have some M &Ms.

[819] So arrogant.

[820] Do you remember seeing when they closed the beaches and him and his family were the only one on the beach?

[821] Oh, yeah.

[822] Yeah.

[823] Oh, yeah.

[824] Disgusting.

[825] That says everything.

[826] Just his body says everything.

[827] Let yourself get to that state.

[828] Yeah.

[829] And he had an operation, too.

[830] Ugh.

[831] He had a stomach stapling.

[832] Did he really?

[833] And ate through it.

[834] Look at that.

[835] Fucking blob.

[836] Every state beach was closed.

[837] I think on the 4th of July.

[838] And him and his fat family were just sitting there on the beach.

[839] Just what an F you to everybody.

[840] Look at that.

[841] There's extreme.

[842] Nobody else allowed.

[843] Extreme arrogance.

[844] And why would the beaches close down?

[845] for the budget he he ordered him closed right because they couldn't pay for people to watch the beaches it was patrol the beaches it's like one of those pissing matches between you know who's gonna cut what for the budget and on the 4th of July sand portrait of him look at that someone made one of him in the sand that's hilarious yeah the 4th of July look at him in his little shower sandals I think the kids call those slides they call them slides yeah the kids call those slides I hate slides I call him flip -flops.

[846] Like, no, no, no, that's not a flip -flop.

[847] That's a slide.

[848] When I see someone in the airport with slides on, I just want to punch them.

[849] A lot of dudes have slides in the airport with socks on.

[850] I'm like, okay.

[851] What are you doing?

[852] What are you doing here?

[853] Why is that annoying me?

[854] Because it's lazy.

[855] You don't like lazy.

[856] It's lazy.

[857] Yeah, but I have those Solomon running shoes that don't even have, they don't have laces.

[858] They have, like, this little tab you pull, and you pull it down, and it tightens up, and you open it up, and it's like Velcro.

[859] Yeah, but you're still pulling a tab.

[860] At least there's a little something there.

[861] Is that what it is?

[862] Yeah, just stick them in your feet and flop, flop through the air, flop, flop, flop.

[863] People don't like that?

[864] Is that why people don't like that?

[865] Yeah, because they're lazy.

[866] Just going to the airport and be as comfortable as possible.

[867] You're very, very excited about this.

[868] It makes me so angry.

[869] But why?

[870] Because you're a 25 -year -old man sitting on the floor of an airport waiting for your thing next to your shower sandals.

[871] It's not a lot of people do it, though.

[872] It's not a lot of people do it, but enough people do it with the socks and the slides.

[873] It bothers me so much.

[874] I don't know why.

[875] Does it bother you more or less than flip -flops?

[876] A little bit more, which is pretty crazy because I really railed against people with flip -flops.

[877] Like Burke Kreisher wears flip -flops everywhere.

[878] Disgusting.

[879] He's kind of gross.

[880] It's so gross.

[881] And people act like their feet don't have, your feet have a real bacteria between the toes.

[882] there's like a real there's real germs in there and then they're just slipping them off and putting their toes in the magazine rack but bird is like this life of the party type character that's part of his thing it's his thing I love him but he's disgusting he was there's a video of him on a fucking skateboard flying down his street with flip flops on I'm like dude do you understand the damage to your toes that you could do for the rest of your life your toes is going to be fucked up if you crash.

[883] He's flying down the street.

[884] The flip -flops on.

[885] He's hilarious.

[886] But no. I mean, at least he's a character, like, bigger -than -life character.

[887] You're just a flip -flop and you don't care and your pants are hanging off just to get on a flight to Boise.

[888] Just come on.

[889] Why Boise?

[890] Why'd you pick on Boise?

[891] I love Boise.

[892] What's the issue?

[893] Because it's a shorter flight.

[894] I didn't want it to be.

[895] I'm like, you can't even get it together for a short flight.

[896] Yeah.

[897] You know, it's disgusting.

[898] It is weird.

[899] is weird it's just come on we have very specific ideas about footwear i judge people when i see them with easies on yeah including jamie i have something right there no i don't know you gave me them i don't have them they're exactly where they sat right below me here yeah that was like six months ago right when he gave them they they're in the box right there i've contemplated running in them running through like a creep and filming it because people love these things so much but uh i don't want to run in them are they expensive because i like running in shoes that are actually supposed to be running in.

[900] Yeah, they're expensive.

[901] He gets, look at him.

[902] He's upset.

[903] Jamie's one generation younger than me, so his idea of what these things are is different than my idea.

[904] I feel like they're mad at you for saying that right now.

[905] Some people are, some people think it's hilarious.

[906] You would do that.

[907] That I would run with them?

[908] Yeah, yeah.

[909] Yeah.

[910] I know, they're mad at me. But they're dumb.

[911] If you're mad at me for what I would do with a pair of sneakers, you're a fucking idiot.

[912] All right?

[913] And you need to get your shit together.

[914] It's not your sneakers.

[915] You're thinking about sneakers too much.

[916] Are you happier?

[917] Do they just sitting here in this fucking...

[918] And people think I'm joking?

[919] Yeah, what do they look like?

[920] They're sitting here in this fucking box.

[921] I'm not joking.

[922] I mean, I didn't plan this out.

[923] They're here.

[924] So people who are into them are like, oh my God, you got him there and you're not using them.

[925] You got him and you're not even flossing.

[926] You should be out flossing, man. Where are those...

[927] He got them for me. He's taunting me because I mock his all the time.

[928] They look like some sneakers from the 80s.

[929] Right.

[930] It's like, they look like the sneaker version of that shitty Mustang from 1979.

[931] No, man, the cool.

[932] The whole back end sticks out.

[933] Like, the heel has like a duck bill behind you.

[934] It's so stupid.

[935] It's so bizarre.

[936] Yeah, but, um.

[937] That Kanye West has a large effect on humans.

[938] Very interesting.

[939] on the family feud last night.

[940] They were on Family Feud?

[941] Well, was there any good?

[942] I just heard Howard Stern talking about it.

[943] I hope they asked them tough questions.

[944] Just to see them fall apart.

[945] Try be in a book in that house.

[946] You will collect dust, motherfucker.

[947] We ain't read.

[948] I don't care.

[949] It's broken up into chapters.

[950] Yeah, they ain't reading shit in that house.

[951] They ain't even read tweets.

[952] Elon Musk wants to do the podcast Right back here on The Feud Really?

[953] You message me Can I come in as your co -host?

[954] That'd be fun No I'll just listen like everybody else That's really cool Yeah it should be interesting Yeah he wants to get his Model 3 up to Some high level production And once it's done The Tunnels?

[955] No, Model 3 Tesla Oh the Model 3?

[956] Yeah He's close concentrating on.

[957] Yeah, he's just...

[958] Yeah, once he's got that.

[959] They just delivered their first 1 ,000 flamethrowers this weekend.

[960] Yeah, what's up with that?

[961] Why is y 'all in flame throwers?

[962] I don't know.

[963] I almost bought one just to do it, just to see what happened.

[964] What's buy one?

[965] And you couldn't do it...

[966] It's taken out back.

[967] You couldn't do it as a flamethrower, so he named it not a flamethrower.

[968] Is that what it's called?

[969] Yeah, it's called not a flame thrower.

[970] It's that way you can actually...

[971] I have a boring company, not a flame thrower.

[972] Wow.

[973] They went out to like some airport hangar to pick them up, I guess.

[974] Okay, but who would it...

[975] What happens when people get killed by these things?

[976] Wait a minute.

[977] Is there a mariachi band playing?

[978] They're having a good time.

[979] It's a frame thrower thing?

[980] Yeah, it's the big unveiling.

[981] That's what you picked them up?

[982] Bannan -na -na -na -na -na -na -na -na -na.

[983] Is that real?

[984] Yeah.

[985] So go back up to that photo of the flamethrower.

[986] Jesus Christ.

[987] Look at that fucking thing.

[988] Pretty cool.

[989] Oh, my God.

[990] That's amazing.

[991] Yeah.

[992] I've just got to buy propane maybe to refill it and connect it, and it's good to go.

[993] Seems like it's going to cause a house fire.

[994] What's the purpose of that?

[995] To when you When your enemies come close And you run out of bullets You hide behind the couch And get them with that Or if you're in the movie alien Yeah They had flamethrowers Yeah You need to burn them Instead of shoot them Because it's a You're on a spaceship If you live on a spaceship Oh right Right What are you gonna do with a Flamethrower My boyfriend asks me And that's her That's the author out there Blasting Yeah She doesn't even have The stock Against her fucking armpit She doesn't even know What she's doing where she's got the stock.

[996] I don't know.

[997] Terrible technique.

[998] You're supposed to tuck that in your arm, honey.

[999] Yeah, well, there's not a lot of kickback on a flame thrower.

[1000] You do that like you're a goddamn professional.

[1001] You exercise with trigger control, too.

[1002] What about his tunnels?

[1003] What about his tunnels?

[1004] I didn't realize how many tunnels he wants.

[1005] Dude, he wants us, he's doing everything.

[1006] He's making flamethrowers.

[1007] Yeah.

[1008] He's making these gigawatt factories, these gigantic batteries that are powering Australia.

[1009] Yeah.

[1010] In Nevada?

[1011] He's a very, very unusual human being.

[1012] It's amazing.

[1013] It's just, the balls.

[1014] Just do it.

[1015] You get an idea, just do it.

[1016] She does not know how to handle that gun.

[1017] Somebody told me they saw him speaking about the tunnels.

[1018] Because he's got to get approval.

[1019] There's different things he's got to get past.

[1020] And he doesn't just want a tunnel like from here to LAX.

[1021] He wants multiple tunnels.

[1022] So like if you're going to the United Terminal, it takes you right there.

[1023] If it goes to the American one, it takes you there.

[1024] It's going to be a whole like, farm of tunnels all through the city what happens if we get an earthquake what happens if there's a tsunami do those things fill up with water and does everybody drown inside those tubes this says the tunnels are weatherproof hmm that means when it rains yeah that's not what about an earthquake i don't think earthquake is weather hmm no i know i'm looking to see if they have any i've been getting claustrophobic lately oh why i don't know like in what way i had a couple little instances where i was like i've never been claustrophobic before 1994 Northridge earthquake no damage to LA subway tunnels 1989 Loma Prieta northern California earthquake no damage to tunnels 1985 Mexico City earthquake no damage to tunnels which were then used to transport rescue personnel The tunnels were in shape but there's a big rock over the hole that gets you out of the tunnel A building fell on it You try to the elevator won't take you up and now you're stuck in that little elevator Living in a tunnel for the rest of your life Life to death in there.

[1025] You try walking and you get clipped by some other guy and a Tesla going 120 miles an hour in the tunnel.

[1026] Yeah.

[1027] You get run over.

[1028] Everyone's turning into rat people.

[1029] Because the tunnel's not big enough for you to walk in while there's cars in it.

[1030] No. I think they recently changed the plan, which is going to be these things called electric skates, which people get on like a subway car.

[1031] Like a pod.

[1032] Yeah, instead of your car getting in there.

[1033] But small, like only like 16 people.

[1034] Yeah.

[1035] Right to the airport.

[1036] Shoot!

[1037] Right to downtown.

[1038] man yeah it'd be pretty cool but i don't know if my claustrophobia will kick in he's got that and then there's another thing the hyperloop he's doing that hyperloop thing too the hyperloop is the uh that's the like the fucking train that goes to san francisco like 13 seconds that's him too yeah dude yeah what the fuck just keep doing it but this is the crazy thing it's one guy like how is this one guy that innovative yeah how is he that smart i don't know he's uh but is he funny he's pretty funny sometimes he's a comedy fan came to the store yeah he's been at the store yeah he was at Largo with uh Johnny Depp's ex oh oh right cut that loose though that's the only oh he did good smart guy smart guy exactly that was my only time I worried about him I saw him I know some events was like oh no what is he doing you probably just getting some of that crazy pussy I just googled hyperloop it's not being associated with him I know he is doing that but he might not be the only person or maybe he's just involved in the project it's a different Could be.

[1039] Well, he's also involved in the fucking rocket project.

[1040] SpaceX.

[1041] He's going to Mars.

[1042] That's what I wanted to ask you.

[1043] Have you talked about 3D printing?

[1044] A couple times, yeah, we've talked about it.

[1045] I just watched that recent Vice on 3D printing.

[1046] Pretty amazing.

[1047] Oh, my God.

[1048] Yeah.

[1049] Do you know who has one?

[1050] That guy, the fucking puppet guy, Jeff Dunham?

[1051] Dunham.

[1052] Jeff Dunham, yeah.

[1053] He makes puppets with him?

[1054] He makes a lot of shit with him.

[1055] He was on Opie and Anthony back in the day.

[1056] Apparently he's like a super tech geek.

[1057] Yeah.

[1058] And he was on Opey and Anthony back in the day, and he was talking.

[1059] He had like one of the earlier 3D printers.

[1060] Really?

[1061] Yeah, they're getting really, really complex.

[1062] They're making human body parts.

[1063] They're making human ears.

[1064] There he is.

[1065] Making the Ahmed Mobile controlled chaos Jeff Dunham.

[1066] So he does all this stuff himself.

[1067] He's a fucking character, Jeff Dunham.

[1068] Yeah.

[1069] Interesting guy.

[1070] That's amazing.

[1071] like you put anything and the computer like actually there was show like a dishwasher and the guy wanted to manufacture the part that's inside the dishwasher the computer says no we can improve on that part and we're going to alter the shape of it and have it be like this and then it makes that and then you use it it's getting so crazy human cells and they're making ears and skin and it's amazing well they think that in the future you won't be buying things you'll be downloading schematics.

[1072] Oh.

[1073] And then getting the raw materials.

[1074] And then the raw materials you'll have, like, in your machine somehow or another, and it'll make whatever you need.

[1075] Like, say, if you need a French press.

[1076] Right.

[1077] It'll make a French press.

[1078] It'll make a French press for you.

[1079] You won't go to the store and buy one.

[1080] You'll just, like, download the, whatever it is.

[1081] You don't need a manufacturer, and no one's going to be in this business of making presses.

[1082] Less, I mean, less and less.

[1083] And, but the thing is, like, more and more demand will be for things like this table.

[1084] Right.

[1085] Like craftsmanship or someone makes something for you.

[1086] Right, right.

[1087] Yeah, which is you're kind of seeing that now.

[1088] Like, people are getting, you know, there's all these restaurants that are like kind of farm to table.

[1089] They have wooden metal and everything is like rustic and everything's like kind of retro.

[1090] Everyone has armpit hair.

[1091] That's not what we're talking about.

[1092] Oh.

[1093] They had razors a long time ago.

[1094] There's no excuse for girls to have armpit hair.

[1095] Isn't it funny, guys, it's fine.

[1096] It's fine.

[1097] I have armpit hair.

[1098] Do you have armpit hair?

[1099] I do, of course you do.

[1100] We're men.

[1101] If you don't have armpit hair, I'm like, what happened?

[1102] You got a disease, bro?

[1103] Were you in a fire?

[1104] You got alopecia?

[1105] Does your friend have a flamethrower?

[1106] It's like girls with their junk.

[1107] Like, okay, here's a perfect example.

[1108] Butthole hair on girls.

[1109] Right.

[1110] Like when we were kids?

[1111] Can't get enough.

[1112] Standard.

[1113] It was normal.

[1114] It was there.

[1115] It was chaos.

[1116] Right.

[1117] Just how you grew.

[1118] It was just a big fucking pile of whatever.

[1119] Nowadays?

[1120] If you're a gal, you're a young single gal and you got butt hole hair, you're taking some risks, right?

[1121] You're like, I don't care.

[1122] Love me who I am.

[1123] Yeah, you must be into older men because that's the only one that is accepting it.

[1124] Love me for who I am.

[1125] Like, um, no. No, we're not doing that anymore.

[1126] We're trying to evolve and the first thing that's evolving is women's hair.

[1127] You've got to start somewhere.

[1128] Right?

[1129] Like, how many women, when you go to the beach, how many women shave their legs?

[1130] All of them.

[1131] All of them.

[1132] That's fucking crazy.

[1133] Like, think about, Like the grooming standards that we've imposed on women, like the culture is imposed on women.

[1134] It's pretty crazy.

[1135] It's fucking crazy.

[1136] It's so crazy.

[1137] In comparison to us, like you and I?

[1138] Look at us balding, fucking hairy armpits and shit.

[1139] I have one patch of hair on my back.

[1140] Oh, yeah, like a wolf.

[1141] Just like one side.

[1142] Like when American Wear Old from London, the transformation sequences.

[1143] Yeah, like I stopped quarter way through.

[1144] Yeah.

[1145] It's funny.

[1146] I mean, the standards.

[1147] Yeah, it's weird.

[1148] It's very weird.

[1149] It's weird.

[1150] But what's also weird is that people who are really, women who are really progressive, still like doing certain parts of it.

[1151] That for me as a man watching it is always like, yeah, we're all the same and let's own it and stuff.

[1152] But I'm still going to put this big line on my eyes to make it look like I'm going to put extra lashes on to make it look like.

[1153] Yeah.

[1154] It's weird.

[1155] Like the, what you choose to.

[1156] Sculpted eyebrows and shit.

[1157] Eyebrows.

[1158] Some dudes sculpt their eyebrows Yeah They got a word for those guys Because they're in Starts with an F Ends with a T And it rhymes with a faggot No A cabaret star Yes It's a bundle of wood No it's Yeah it's very bizarre I always feel like But they also like It's empowering to feel good And it does make Women feel good To be in heels And then there's different standards For gay folks Like gay guys They do it Way different.

[1159] And by the way, when I use that F word, I should not use that.

[1160] And definitely wouldn't use it for gay guys.

[1161] We know.

[1162] Consider the source.

[1163] Gotta be careful, though.

[1164] Gonna be careful in today's days, day and age.

[1165] Yeah, but people know you're a good person.

[1166] Some people don't.

[1167] They know you're making it joke.

[1168] People are, it's a dangerous time.

[1169] Did you hear the Lisa Lampinelli thing?

[1170] What happened?

[1171] She was screaming at an audience member, like really completely off the charts.

[1172] I think it just happened last night.

[1173] I don't know.

[1174] I heard it in the radio.

[1175] She's like screaming.

[1176] You sons of bitches.

[1177] Did you see that?

[1178] She yelled at them, called them sons of bitches?

[1179] Onstage nuclear meltdown, fan hands her $100 to shut up.

[1180] She goes off.

[1181] Does she have blue on her hair?

[1182] Yeah, she's got blue in her hair.

[1183] Nuclear meltdown.

[1184] Someone tried to say something in the middle of her set, and she just goes batshit crazy.

[1185] What?

[1186] She went nuclear on a fan who gave her $100 to shut up in the middle of her gigs.

[1187] Well, here's the thing, like, why would someone, why would someone pay her at a show to try to get her to shut up?

[1188] I don't know.

[1189] So when, after someone from the balcony called her a cunt, it all went downhill from there.

[1190] Oh, God.

[1191] Oh, God.

[1192] How long is it going to be before you can't say that word anymore?

[1193] Probably good until, like, next Wednesday.

[1194] Yeah, we're running the sand and the hourglass.

[1195] Yeah.

[1196] Like I said, like when I just said faggot, I felt it.

[1197] I'm like, ooh, this is a dangerous time to say that word.

[1198] Yeah.

[1199] Don't say it anymore.

[1200] Yeah, no, no, no, no. Even as a joke.

[1201] Uh -huh.

[1202] Even not even calling an individual person.

[1203] It's just saying the noise that is that word.

[1204] Like, it's get down to the, like you'd have to call it the other F word.

[1205] Yeah.

[1206] But the N word, it's clearly established, right?

[1207] Yeah.

[1208] People say it all the time.

[1209] People even say it on stage in a comedy set.

[1210] They'll say the N word.

[1211] Right.

[1212] say the N word.

[1213] They won't say it.

[1214] No, no, no. And if they do say it, people are gas, yes.

[1215] Yeah, forget it.

[1216] From the crowd.

[1217] Forget it.

[1218] No, that's gone.

[1219] But Jamie was talking about, yeah, pretty much.

[1220] Yeah, retarded is, I think it's probably...

[1221] But you can say it, but the way you're saying it, you can say retarded.

[1222] Right, right, the N word, you wouldn't say it.

[1223] No. You won't even say it.

[1224] No, I'm too scared.

[1225] It's the word bigger, but without the B, with a different, with an N in it.

[1226] I can't even do that.

[1227] I'm not that.

[1228] I can't even say bigger, but without a B, with an N. That's how tricky it is.

[1229] I'm just feeling for the keys in my pocket.

[1230] Damaged.

[1231] We're terrified.

[1232] Jamie, you were telling me about what was the rap concert where the girl got on stage and she was saying?

[1233] Yeah, the Kendrick Lamar concert, which, so I guess there's a song that happens a lot.

[1234] You can see lots of videos of the crowds singing all the words, which has a lot of N -words in it.

[1235] Including white people in the crowd.

[1236] Correct.

[1237] Yeah, lots of white people.

[1238] Mainly way.

[1239] Yeah.

[1240] So in the Contra Alabama Yeah, I'll pull one up as I'm ever talking about So Concord in Alabama, the Hangout Fest I pulled a girl up on stage She was obviously drunk Like kind of almost set her up to do it And as soon as she said it like two or three times He stopped it, stopped the whole thing Well, what did she say in reference to It's in the song Oh so she's a lyric?

[1241] Yeah, she was doing like karaoke Like a song lyric Yeah, I'll pull up the video And then they He turned on her?

[1242] No, no, no, no That's not for you That's only for me Wait, way, way, way, way.

[1243] That's meme.

[1244] Yeah, I, setting her up.

[1245] I had a bit from 2009 from my Spike TV special.

[1246] Here, woman gets on stage.

[1247] You ready?

[1248] What's your name?

[1249] Delaney.

[1250] Delaney.

[1251] Oh, and she's going to do it?

[1252] Oh, my God, she's going to see.

[1253] He set her up.

[1254] Yeah, that's terrible.

[1255] She said, where we started that?

[1256] Where we started at.

[1257] Here we go.

[1258] He's mocking her already.

[1259] I told you, every time.

[1260] Wow.

[1261] She must be so nervous.

[1262] All got along.

[1263] They probably got me down by the end of the song.

[1264] Are we playing this over YouTube or will we get pulled?

[1265] I don't think so.

[1266] Find out what happens.

[1267] The crowd's already yelling.

[1268] Oh, Jesus Christ.

[1269] Wait, wait, wait.

[1270] That's terrible This is crazy They're doing this all he's down But they're your lyrics He's an opinion He's asked the kicker off They're all up the thumbs down Get off you said the noise That he says that we love You can't say the noise That's mostly it I don't know Come on man That's me We live in hilarious and preposterous times I mean that is so strange that is his song yeah he wrote it the song he wrote the words that is his song she loves him she loves him she's at his concert he gave her the microphone played the song she's singing the song that he loves that he wrote that the whole audience loves and everybody's like you did the wrong thing you made the noise wow that was mean she was so crazy the whole crowd doing it though And this whole crowd looks mostly white.

[1271] Yeah.

[1272] They're all streaming it.

[1273] Okay.

[1274] And the fuck.

[1275] So how's that work?

[1276] We got a double standard?

[1277] I don't.

[1278] This is why I stay home.

[1279] But wait a minute.

[1280] How does that work?

[1281] That's why I don't go to concert.

[1282] If there's a lot of people there, you can do it.

[1283] You can do it if there's a bunch of people there.

[1284] If, yeah.

[1285] But you can't do it if you're by yourself.

[1286] No. On stage, by yourself, in front of those people, you can't do it.

[1287] But if you're in with them, you could do it.

[1288] Yes.

[1289] And that was mostly white.

[1290] That was a lot of white there.

[1291] Of course.

[1292] In that one.

[1293] White people are ridiculous.

[1294] They're so confused.

[1295] We're so confused.

[1296] I mean, this is a strange time.

[1297] I was going to say, I did this Spike TV special in 2009.

[1298] And there was a...

[1299] Do you remember that old commercial with the girl comes home and her dog started talking to her?

[1300] Like, Lindsay, I really wish you wouldn't smoke pot.

[1301] You're not the same when you smoke pot and I miss my friend.

[1302] Remember that big?

[1303] I had this whole thing where I was like...

[1304] I was like, first of all, whatever that chick's on, she's not on pot.

[1305] Because if you were on pot, you'd be like, wait a minute, my fucking dog can talk?

[1306] Like, how long you've been able to talk?

[1307] Dude, I had you my whole fucking life.

[1308] I've had your whole life.

[1309] This is the first shit you said?

[1310] Right.

[1311] You know, and I went through this whole thing, and I called my dog a faggot.

[1312] And this guy, this was like in the beginning of political correctness, right?

[1313] Because this is 2009.

[1314] He, this is a gay guy said to me. he goes you can't say that word that's our nigger that's our word right that's what he said right he literally said I go wait a minute what did you just say yeah and he said it again he said it's our nigger we're allowed to say it you can't say it I go that's the gayest shit I've ever heard and he started laughing I go that's so crazy you can't I go I'm talking to a dog I'm talking I'm angry at a dog because I've had this dog my whole life this first words out of his mouth.

[1315] I tell you I love you every day.

[1316] And and what do you say?

[1317] You say, I wish you wouldn't smoke weed.

[1318] Hey, fuck you stupid.

[1319] I smoke weed and I go to work and I pay for your food faggot.

[1320] Like that was that was the joke.

[1321] That was and he got he got like, I'm like, these rules are preposterous.

[1322] Isn't it supposed to be about intent?

[1323] Okay, isn't it supposed to be like I'm supposed to be conveying how I feel and the words are supposed to mirror my thoughts?

[1324] Like when you have magic words that you can't say And in this case with the N word It's even crazier because it's like Some people could say it You could say it sometimes sometimes you can't say it Yeah It's too heavy But black people could say it White people can't but white people can say it If they're in the crowd and they're yelling it out But as long as there's an A on the end of it Yeah Right exactly the ER is what gets you in trouble Well look racism Is disgusting all racism Racism against Chinese people, racism against white people, racism against every, of course, against black people, of course against everyone.

[1325] Judging someone on something that they have no control over.

[1326] That's what it is.

[1327] Like you're born, whatever you're born, Irish, German, Italian, African, you're born.

[1328] It's not you.

[1329] Yeah.

[1330] You're just who you are.

[1331] Yeah.

[1332] So racism is disgusting.

[1333] But is that, is it racism when you have that girl on stage and she's singing that song?

[1334] song that she loves that you sing it's your song like that's not really racism no so when she's singing along and everybody's boo you racist you fucking nazi like what are we doing right because this is what we're we've gone into some ridiculous zone where it's not doesn't make any sense because we know that's not her intent no exactly right this is it becomes an intellectual exercise exactly it becomes like a word game it's a little puzzle kind of thing that we're doing to trap this person you could say she's very innocent up there they all know she's a little drunk it's kind of like setting someone up to do something what yeah it's pretty gross it's just weird but it's weird that it's so universal like that crowd that was probably 20 ,000 people yeah boom I had a weird thing on uh you know I'm I'm I'm I'm on the show live from here the old Prair home companion show and uh you know I'm the writer for it and stuff had writer out and appear on it and stuff.

[1335] Anyway, I'm very involved with the show.

[1336] Chris, who's this bluegrass guy who plays a mandolin, who's amazing, the kindest person you'd ever meet.

[1337] Like, super, super sweet, sweet person, like Mr. Rogers in a way.

[1338] Like, it's to that level of kindness.

[1339] And he sings everybody's birthdays and stuff, and he sings different songs and as a tribute to everything.

[1340] He loves all music.

[1341] He loves everything.

[1342] He sang a Kendrick Lamar song.

[1343] He sang a little bit of it because it was his birthday that week.

[1344] And he got so much hate online that a white person can't be singing that song.

[1345] What is the song about?

[1346] It's, I don't know.

[1347] But it wasn't, that wasn't the thing.

[1348] So it was, it was that he was, what's the thing?

[1349] Cultural appropriation.

[1350] That he's not allowed to sing and meanwhile he's singing bluegrass Indian music right I mean from all around the world this is a kind soul celebrating everything and it really freaked him out because he is so nice he couldn't believe the hate that he got from it that now he's super sensitive about singing that music at all it's not logical it's not logical you have to put your foot down and you have to consider the source but culturally we have to put our foot down because we're going down this very strange illogical road where you could just decide what's evil and what's bad and it doesn't have any bearing on the thought or the intent behind it.

[1351] Look, they went after Bruno Mars.

[1352] Like, get in the, just get the fuck out of here.

[1353] Yeah.

[1354] They accuse Bruno Mars of cultural appropriation.

[1355] What culture?

[1356] He's everything.

[1357] He's everything.

[1358] He's a bunch of stuff.

[1359] He's like the perfect.

[1360] But meanwhile, what is he doing where anybody would accuse him of cultural appropriation?

[1361] He sings these beautiful fucking songs.

[1362] Oh, he's a light in this world.

[1363] He's amazing.

[1364] Yes.

[1365] I love that guy.

[1366] Oh, the guy's amazing.

[1367] His voice is fantastic and his songs are fun and they're, catchy and the i love listening to them i saw him in Vegas in concert it was just the most uplifting bright thing you know what made me happy though is that a bunch of black artists said fuck you he's great like what was the original charge just fucking social justice warriors were going after him for cultural appropriation all these like super progressive angry fuckheads we're deciding whatever man it doesn't have to make sense this is the thing right they're just looking for targets yeah it doesn't have to make sense.

[1368] This is not, it's not like a logical progression.

[1369] Like, oh, Bruno Mars is it's not like, oh, he's stealing from these old blues singers and he's not crediting them and he's a white guy from Kentucky.

[1370] That's not what we're dealing with here.

[1371] We're dealing with a multiracial guy who sings these beautiful songs that they don't, they're not cultural appropriation even if he was white.

[1372] Yeah, no, exactly.

[1373] It's just a joy of music.

[1374] And music is a mix of everything.

[1375] It's a I think they're saying like his style.

[1376] But if that's the case, then here's the case.

[1377] I'm a fucking huge fan of the Black Keys.

[1378] The Black Keys, a lot of their shit, is blues.

[1379] A lot of it is old blues.

[1380] Like, it sounds so similar to some great old blues.

[1381] Sure.

[1382] Is that cultural appropriation?

[1383] I mean, I love them.

[1384] Are you saying they should stop doing what I love to hear?

[1385] No, come on.

[1386] What are we doing?

[1387] Yeah, that's crazy.

[1388] But what is it?

[1389] But you know what?

[1390] The other part of it is, How many people are really complaining about that stuff?

[1391] It's a very small amount.

[1392] So small.

[1393] But it's enough where your friend got scared.

[1394] He did get scared.

[1395] And it literally amounts to probably three tweets.

[1396] You know what I mean?

[1397] It's like, but those people, that's the only noise.

[1398] People aren't saying, wow, I love that version because they just like it and they're normal people.

[1399] It's these haters that just want to do it.

[1400] But the people in control of it have to calm him and make him realize we've got your back.

[1401] They brought, though.

[1402] No, that's the problem.

[1403] They'll fucking fire him if it gets loud.

[1404] enough.

[1405] It doesn't have to make any sense.

[1406] Yeah.

[1407] That's where it's squirrelly.

[1408] Dude, they fired, speaking of Prairie Home Companion, they fired Garrison Keeler.

[1409] I know.

[1410] They fired him, removed his name from everything because he hugged a lady and his hand went down her back.

[1411] Yeah.

[1412] And then he apologized, sent her an email.

[1413] She said it's fine.

[1414] They went back and forth with it.

[1415] Didn't do anything else.

[1416] No history of sexual harassment, sexual assault.

[1417] No history of anything terrible.

[1418] Years later, when all this Me Too stuff comes out, she comes out with that.

[1419] Yeah, it was dirty.

[1420] business.

[1421] Yeah.

[1422] It was dirty.

[1423] It's dirty.

[1424] But it doesn't, it's not logical.

[1425] Right.

[1426] It's like there's this fever feeding frenzy that goes on with these things.

[1427] This mob mentality.

[1428] Yeah.

[1429] They just want to tear people down.

[1430] They want to tear people apart.

[1431] And I really believe that you have to in all these situations is consider the source.

[1432] Like you really have to consider, it's like when the steroid thing went down.

[1433] There were like, people came at Barry Bond's harder than everybody else because he had a rep for not being a good guy.

[1434] People did not like him regardless.

[1435] of that.

[1436] So when it happens, people kind of...

[1437] Did they come after him harder than they came after Sammy Sosa?

[1438] Yes.

[1439] Yeah, and much harder than, like, Andy Pettett or, you know...

[1440] I don't know what that is.

[1441] He's a pitcher for the Yankees and it's just like a nice guy and they don't kind of, you know.

[1442] But if somebody is a problem...

[1443] Jose Canseco.

[1444] Well, Jose Cansego was a problem because he ratted everybody out.

[1445] Oh, yeah, that's right.

[1446] He wrote that book called Juiced.

[1447] Boy, that's interesting.

[1448] That's interesting.

[1449] That's interesting.

[1450] That made him persona non grata.

[1451] Like, he got...

[1452] Kind of disappeared.

[1453] He got written off.

[1454] Yeah.

[1455] From that book.

[1456] Like, people just decided, fuck you.

[1457] Yeah.

[1458] That's interesting, right?

[1459] It is.

[1460] It is.

[1461] You had too much of a snitch, I guess.

[1462] Yeah, man. People just didn't respect him after that.

[1463] Yeah.

[1464] Because there was so many people that were also doing it, and he was the one that ratted everybody out and profited off of it.

[1465] Yeah.

[1466] There's some justice, some street justice in that.

[1467] Mm -hmm.

[1468] I just think that we have to be really careful with call.

[1469] It's just, there's also an issue that everyone has.

[1470] access to social media and everyone has the ability to complain about things yeah everybody there's a whole world right so there's a lot of noise a ton of it yeah you get the real sound like like there are things that happen that are really bad and when something happens it's really bad yeah the the the Twitter mob and the all the people that go after these people for something that's that's legitimately awful sure it makes sense yeah I mean it's there's justice to it yeah but there's also like this constant looking for targets yes that it seems like they're that's kind of like a hobby of some people yeah like that is their thing 100 % is just to go out and pick people off yeah it's awful it's a it's a horrible thing it is and you know because it's because in it at its best it's a really wonderful thing right it's a celebratory thing that you have this community that you share with and think about like you can see things from all around the world.

[1471] You could see cultures.

[1472] You could see young people doing amazing things and all these different little tiny spots around.

[1473] I mean, in so many ways, it's beautiful.

[1474] But then there's just like this little dark underbelly of like hate.

[1475] There really just is good and bad in the world.

[1476] There is good and bad in the world, but there's also people that are just very frustrated and looking to vent that frustration as often as they can on whatever targets they find to be viable.

[1477] Yeah.

[1478] It's not like they've carefully considered the issue and carefully consider this person's stance on it.

[1479] Like, for me, one of the big ones was the Roseanne Barr thing because Roseanne Barr, what she said seemed racist, right?

[1480] You look at it on the surface.

[1481] She called that lady something like a cross between the Muslim Brotherhood and the planet of the apes.

[1482] Right.

[1483] And like, oh, geez, she's calling a black woman an ape.

[1484] She said she didn't even know that woman was black.

[1485] And then you see her photo and you go, oh, okay, that woman is very racially ambiguous.

[1486] Like, I talked to her on the phone.

[1487] She told me. Oh, yeah.

[1488] She did not know that woman.

[1489] She goes, you really think that I would call a black lady planet of the apes?

[1490] I'm not fucking stupid.

[1491] She's, and that was her literal word.

[1492] She goes, I didn't know.

[1493] She goes, I just was fucked up on Ambien and drinking all weekend and tweeting a bunch of stupid shit, her own words.

[1494] Right.

[1495] She's like, I didn't know what I was saying.

[1496] Right.

[1497] And no one cares, though.

[1498] No one cares that you got a lady who has mental illness, like a history of mental illness, is on a host of different medications, is on Ambien as well and drinking and smoking pot.

[1499] No one cares.

[1500] You compared a black woman to Planet of the Apes.

[1501] Right.

[1502] And then all these people made these memes where they put a photo of that woman next to that woman from the Planet of the Apes.

[1503] Right.

[1504] And, like, you know, you see why she was joking around about it, but it's totally off limits.

[1505] So they've decided she's this horrible racist.

[1506] Forget about all her years of, you know, people loving her.

[1507] Well, she also has, if you go back to the source kind of thing, it's like, you know, there's a picture of her dress like a Nazi.

[1508] Right, but she's Jewish.

[1509] I know, but there's like, there's enough.

[1510] She's always tweeting bombastic stuff.

[1511] So when you.

[1512] She's got issues.

[1513] It's not, yeah.

[1514] So it's not like, it's not like somebody like Rachel Ray just making muffins and all of a sudden one tweet comes out.

[1515] She's in that area.

[1516] And I think when you're in that area and you're spewing hate and you're throwing fireballs and stuff, whether you have good intent or not, you're in that arena, you can get burned by it.

[1517] Yeah, she's a shitster.

[1518] You know what I mean?

[1519] Yeah, she's a total shitster.

[1520] We remember the National Anthem.

[1521] She grabs her crotch and spits in the ground.

[1522] Apparently, everyone fucking was super, she was scared after that because that's a patriotic thing.

[1523] Oh, yeah.

[1524] You don't fucking do that to America.

[1525] No, people were mad.

[1526] I remember that.

[1527] The issue that with Roseanne, to me, is not even that tweet, not even the recent plan of the apes one.

[1528] It's an earlier one that she made five years ago, which is much more racist.

[1529] Oh, really?

[1530] About, yeah, about Susan Rice, where she said Susan Rice is a man with big swinging ape balls.

[1531] Well, that, and that's, you're talking about an absolutely black woman.

[1532] Yeah, see, there's not.

[1533] There's something there.

[1534] There's like, that's the thing.

[1535] It's the source.

[1536] Like there's this person that has all of this kind of stuff, and she's always going up to the line and not crossing it, but maybe sometimes crossing it.

[1537] And then you do it, you're going to get popped.

[1538] Do you remember when Imus got kicked off the radio for saying about some gals who were athletes?

[1539] You called them nappy -headed hose?

[1540] Oh, yeah, of course.

[1541] And that was like, whoa.

[1542] Yeah.

[1543] Man, you know, look, you want to play in those fire arenas?

[1544] You can get burned.

[1545] Right.

[1546] You know.

[1547] Occasionally you drop some bombs and it's great.

[1548] And you make some, but if you're a shit stirrer.

[1549] Right.

[1550] If that's your thing.

[1551] And you're trying to drop bombs occasionally.

[1552] But the one.

[1553] The shit's going to land on you sometimes.

[1554] It seems like racist bombs are the ones that get you burn the most.

[1555] We have not healed as a nation.

[1556] We're this very confused.

[1557] It's like, you know, we grew up like with an alcoholic dysfunctional fathers.

[1558] And there's like there's a sickness.

[1559] Like when you talked about how.

[1560] only 20 years between Hitler and my Volkswagen coming out.

[1561] There's not that much time between that most heinous part of that today.

[1562] I mean, it's...

[1563] Well, it's less than 200 years, which is two lifetimes.

[1564] It's raw.

[1565] There were two lifetimes between us and slavery.

[1566] I think, like, just recently, like, the last person, last African -American person who was around during slavery just passed.

[1567] I mean, we're...

[1568] You know what I mean?

[1569] We never healed.

[1570] We never had a discussion.

[1571] We didn't go to therapy.

[1572] And forget about just slavery.

[1573] how about the civil rights movement?

[1574] Yes, I mean, how about hosing people, hosing people down with fire hoses and sicking dogs on them?

[1575] That was in, if not our lifetime, just before we were born.

[1576] And still today, there's still, you go to certain parts.

[1577] Charlottesville.

[1578] And people are popping stuff off and people, you know, as a white guy, you walk around, you hear people say shit because they think they're, they're safe around you.

[1579] Well, look at you.

[1580] You look at you.

[1581] You look like, it's still around.

[1582] They look at you.

[1583] And like, this guy is bread?

[1584] This guy just bakes bread and stays home.

[1585] That's why I do it.

[1586] I it's tricky you know what I mean like we have a that is our disease in our in our culture there is a disease that we haven't met it out yet so of course like any if you're gonna pop off about that you're gonna be that's why why are you why are you what's in you that makes you feel like you need to tweet that off well if you're rosanne yeah that's her whole thing is getting this little reaction out of people yeah I mean a lot of comics that's their thing right saying little little little little little controversial things to get a spark out of people that's fine if you and look you know I have a sensitivity that I don't even I don't want to go in that arena because it's just I don't even do well when people yell it right when people yell around me I don't like it it's not me really about anything about anything I don't like it I just don't we're only here for a little while why are you going to fight that's where I live but there's there are people that can do it and they yes and they and they can read there are people that do it who can read tweets calling them horrible things and it just kind of you know bounces off them they don't really care i don't think they read it that's a is that what they do yeah well if you read tweets that about people that say horrible things to you i mean you're going to respond to them are you going to engage in a dialogue and then other people are going to join in you're going to respond to all them you won't have any time there's no there's no time you won't your whole day will be taken up with that with new people jumping into the fray it's like if you want to have a fist fight with a mob, a mob of people.

[1587] You can't really do that because you could have a discussion with a one -on -one person but if you fight a whole crowd of people like that Kendrick Kumar, if that lady was like fuck you bitch, I say that word that's my song!

[1588] And she just like knuckles up and dives in the crowd starts throwing hate makers, she's going to get fucking killed.

[1589] But if she has a discussion with like one of those white guys just doing this boo -boo that was just yelling it out himself, if they you put them alone in a room and And she said, okay, tell me what I did was wrong.

[1590] And he was like, well...

[1591] He turned it to Ralphie Mae.

[1592] It's just fucked up.

[1593] It's just fucked up.

[1594] You know, you can't use that word.

[1595] You know you can't use that word.

[1596] It's like, motherfucker, you were singing it.

[1597] I watched you sing it.

[1598] No, no, no. I sang it with everybody else.

[1599] And I make the noise with my face.

[1600] I like, I open my mouth like I'm going to say it, but I don't say it.

[1601] I go, no. I don't say it.

[1602] I don't say it.

[1603] I kind of start it and then I let other people end it.

[1604] I like do the end part or I do the gun.

[1605] part.

[1606] I don't do the in between.

[1607] I don't do a whole word because that way I'm not racist.

[1608] It's so complex.

[1609] It's crazy.

[1610] It's too crazy.

[1611] But it's not complex.

[1612] It's stupid.

[1613] It is complex.

[1614] But what's complex about that?

[1615] Well, not just that issue.

[1616] But what's complex about that to me is that you have a whole crowd of people.

[1617] Yelling it.

[1618] Responding this way.

[1619] Like, it's on their minds.

[1620] They're having these discussions that we are trying to move things forward.

[1621] Other people are trying to move you back.

[1622] That is complex.

[1623] Well, who's trying to move it back?

[1624] Who's actively saying, I mean, other than like white nationalist groups that everybody pretty much hates other than themselves?

[1625] I guess them.

[1626] And then other people who think that maybe that they're being, that it's being reversed and that they're being hated on now when they, you know, white, like young white kid who just wants to have a good time at the concert and saying, but why are you attacking us?

[1627] We're, we're trying to be this way.

[1628] Someone put up some things at a school that was criticized by a dean and was taken down.

[1629] They put up these signs and said, say it's okay to be white.

[1630] Google that, because this was kind of crazy, that this, whoever this dean was, or whoever it was that chastised these people, they put up these signs that said, it's okay to be white.

[1631] Oh, right.

[1632] And people were angry.

[1633] Yeah, it's like white lives matter, that kind of thing.

[1634] No, but just that statement.

[1635] It's okay to be white.

[1636] Like, why would anybody have a problem with that?

[1637] Why do you feel you got to say that?

[1638] Why do you think about people that aren't white?

[1639] What are you going?

[1640] Yeah.

[1641] That's what I mean.

[1642] It is complex.

[1643] It's too...

[1644] Is that complex or is that fucking stupid?

[1645] Here it is.

[1646] Sign saying, it's okay to be white, found at Maryland high school.

[1647] Found.

[1648] Found.

[1649] Like a bomb.

[1650] Yeah.

[1651] What does it say something?

[1652] At 5 .45 a .m. and removed by staff before students arrived for classes.

[1653] Oh, so they discovered them?

[1654] We're taking this seriously.

[1655] Oh, my God.

[1656] They sent a letter home to families informing them that the signs were discovered on 10 doors.

[1657] at 5 .45 a .m. and removed by staff before students arrive for classes.

[1658] We are taking this seriously and are investigating this incident, wrote Renee Johnson, the school's principal.

[1659] Our research so far has indicated this may be a part of a concerted national campaign to format racial and political tension in our school and community.

[1660] The same flyer was posted in other cities and communities this week.

[1661] Okay.

[1662] But here's the question.

[1663] Do you disagree with the sentiment of that statement?

[1664] it is okay to be white it's okay to be Chinese it's okay to be Indian it's okay to be whatever the fuck you are yeah okay to be racist maybe if they wrote it's okay to be right it's not okay to be racist maybe if they wrote that would that be an issue that would have been that would have helped right that would have helped when you you know you walk into your school campus and all of a sudden there's signs up everywhere that normally there are no signs well if they feel if they're a white person and they feel like they're being openly racially discriminated against is it okay to say hey it's all right to be white.

[1665] Is that okay?

[1666] Yeah, there's, yes, of course.

[1667] So what's wrong with that sign?

[1668] Because you pop them up in the middle of the night and put them all up on it.

[1669] And you come in with your little lunch bag and you're going to teach your Spanish class.

[1670] And on your door is a sign that says, it's okay to be white.

[1671] You just, your knee -jerk reaction is, what are you doing?

[1672] Oh, the flyers appear to be a part of an online campaign that is detailed on the web forum, 4chan.

[1673] Okay.

[1674] But is it a, that, but is that saying that forchance talk?

[1675] about this online campaign or is it saying the 4chan started this online campaign?

[1676] I would lean towards that because it was Halloween night and they discovered on the this article was posted November 1st so it's like not like it's just a fun Halloween prank but like people do do that stuff yeah you know it's like yeah it's totally okay to think it and you know it's like the guy with the bumper stickers all over his car it's like the there those guys are a little more unhinged than the other people it's like yeah I think it's okay to be white do I have to make a sign do I have to go get copies?

[1677] Do I have to get some tape?

[1678] Do I have to sneak on campus?

[1679] Do I have to put it up there?

[1680] There was an article in Washington Post.

[1681] Google this.

[1682] This woman wrote this article.

[1683] Why can't we hate men?

[1684] And it was published in the Washington Post.

[1685] And of course, had a photo of Harvey Weinstein, who's a disgusting man. Right.

[1686] And this is like the perfect example.

[1687] But that is literally like, it's like picking out the worst white man, Hitler.

[1688] Right?

[1689] And why can't we hate white?

[1690] men because all white men are Hitler.

[1691] Why can't we hate white people?

[1692] Is that what the article?

[1693] Well, the article, I don't know what the article says.

[1694] I didn't read it.

[1695] But, I mean, like, how could you write an article that says, why can't we hate men?

[1696] Well, you're because you want to get...

[1697] Unless you're trying to say we can't hate men because men are human and we've got to give everybody a chance and we can't generalize even if men have done horrible things.

[1698] I'd have to read it.

[1699] I don't, I mean, it's definitely the headline is made to make you want to read it.

[1700] It's clickbait.

[1701] Yeah, it's clickbait, exactly.

[1702] it's fascinating how about we just take the hate out guys can't we just do that what's wrong with just tompapa's a big sweetie come on can we just get along you are a big sweetie time how long are you gonna be here how much time i would much rather uh live in a world where you go with your grandfather and get a little get a little bread and you come back home yeah and they yell at each other and you make a meal you know what i mean like why are we spending all this time because i mean there's people that need to spend the time to move the culture and do things and protect themselves that's not what this is this is people trying to get attention for their work they're trying to get attention for their click baity little articles and click baity little things yes of course little campaigns against people that's what it is i mean people love that shit all i would have had to do with this book is is right is right something about trump in it and that people could sound bite right right and i and have a lot of people be like what is and get everybody talking about it right right that's what they're doing they're trying to make up make noise so people look at them and they make more money.

[1703] Well, and then is also, I mean, there has to be a thought behind it, like that men have done some horrible, shitty things.

[1704] So, but the idea of why can't you generalize?

[1705] Of course, well, you can't generalize because you're a nuanced human being.

[1706] Right.

[1707] And you're supposed to be able to understand.

[1708] Thoughtful.

[1709] Well, everyone is different.

[1710] Literally everyone.

[1711] Yes.

[1712] Every single, there's 150 million men.

[1713] The idea of why can't you hate all of them.

[1714] Well, you can, if you want to, but it's a ridiculous way to live your life.

[1715] No, exactly.

[1716] Exactly.

[1717] Exactly.

[1718] So it means are you straight and you were attracted to men and you have to hate them all and quarantine yourself away from them?

[1719] There's a lot of those guys, right?

[1720] There's a lot of really good people out there.

[1721] It's Father's Day.

[1722] How often does that have to happen with people who are homophobic who hate gay people?

[1723] Yeah.

[1724] Who rally against gay marriage and rally against gay rights and then you find out that they're really gay.

[1725] Yes.

[1726] Oh, my, all the time.

[1727] All the time.

[1728] All the time.

[1729] Almost every super religious guy.

[1730] Yeah.

[1731] Anti -gay.

[1732] Some scandal always comes out.

[1733] Oh, he was sleeping with...

[1734] Oh, yeah.

[1735] Oh, they're so common, it's cliche.

[1736] Yeah, I know, right, exactly.

[1737] It's that many of them.

[1738] It's like you look for it.

[1739] When someone, you know, talks about gay, it's a sin against man. Yeah.

[1740] We should lock them up and we should do this to him.

[1741] Oh, oh, someone's sucking dick on a sneak dip.

[1742] Right.

[1743] Oh, let's follow that dude around.

[1744] Yeah, exactly.

[1745] What you're doing behind close girls, son.

[1746] We're going to find it.

[1747] Yeah.

[1748] They'll find it.

[1749] I mean, that's, that is what people do.

[1750] I think what I like about what you're saying and how I feel, too, is that we need to be nice to each other.

[1751] This whole idea of this gotcha bullshit and this attacking people for things that don't necessarily make sense without nuance, without the understanding of complexity of human interaction, with no concern for that at all.

[1752] Yeah.

[1753] Because you just want to target, you know, we have to shun that stuff.

[1754] Yeah, 100%.

[1755] That stuff is just pure foolishness and it's bad for discord.

[1756] it's bad for community, it's bad for the way we communicate with each other.

[1757] It generates more hate.

[1758] And it's also a generalization, a gross generalization, which is just the same thing as sexism.

[1759] It's the same thing as racism.

[1760] It's the same thing.

[1761] Why can't we hate men as a gross generalization?

[1762] Yeah.

[1763] Like that state, I don't know what the article said, but that statement, that's a gross general.

[1764] You can't because you're a nice person.

[1765] Right.

[1766] I assume you're a nice person.

[1767] Yeah.

[1768] Because we don't hate.

[1769] How about that?

[1770] How about we try not to hate them all?

[1771] You hate Justin Trudeau?

[1772] That guy seems like a swat.

[1773] That guy seems awesome.

[1774] You hear Trump?

[1775] Trump called him weak.

[1776] Yeah.

[1777] It's an amazing suit.

[1778] Trump called him weak and dishonest.

[1779] Yeah.

[1780] No, I mean, you know, the culture has enough hate.

[1781] I think the campaign has to be for more kindness.

[1782] Look at that.

[1783] That's a great picture.

[1784] Crazy photo.

[1785] Him sitting there with his arms crossed and they're all leaning on the table.

[1786] Just listen to us.

[1787] Just listen to us.

[1788] Oh, angry.

[1789] Yeah.

[1790] He's like, no. No. I wonder what they're talking about right there.

[1791] Like, should we go to a. lunch I like spaghetti we don't have spaghetti Donald we don't have spaghetti it's a chicken make spaghetti make some fucking spaghetti could someone get spaghetti make me a fucking pizza can't you just get what everybody else gets I wonder what they were talking about that is a great picture though yeah that's great with him being the only one sitting down his arms crossed he looks like so spoiled and her the look on her face she's like ugh is that the woman from Germany Yeah, Merkel.

[1792] She's got problems of her own.

[1793] I have to deal with this guy.

[1794] His fist is on the table.

[1795] Anger or something.

[1796] Anger fist.

[1797] Yeah.

[1798] What are you doing for Father's Day?

[1799] What do you do?

[1800] Just kind of hanging home.

[1801] Every day's Father's Day.

[1802] It's true.

[1803] Yeah, I don't want any special treatment.

[1804] I don't celebrate my birthday.

[1805] I don't want anybody to give me Christmas presents.

[1806] Do they anyway?

[1807] Yeah, of course.

[1808] But I don't.

[1809] I'm the same way.

[1810] Yeah.

[1811] Dad is just supposed to.

[1812] to be there.

[1813] I like having them around.

[1814] I always tell them, I want to see your faces.

[1815] That's all I want.

[1816] Yes, I got all the gifts.

[1817] I got all the love.

[1818] I got everything.

[1819] If I get hugs every day, I'm more than happy.

[1820] Totally.

[1821] I don't want, like, some fucking cake or some stupid shit.

[1822] I don't want to go to brunch.

[1823] There's no Father's Day brunch.

[1824] It's my day.

[1825] There's no Father's Day brunch.

[1826] There's no, like, you know, having to race through the mall and get flowers for Father's Day.

[1827] Just let us be and be around.

[1828] From some woman heckled in Chicago.

[1829] There was like a, it was like, I was talking about, I was actually, it's a pro -woman piece.

[1830] It's a piece about how we forget that women make all the human beings.

[1831] It's like this idea that women are supposed to do everything that men do.

[1832] But they also make all the fucking human beings.

[1833] So I, I, it's a lot, it's like this complex or twisty row that I take people down with this.

[1834] There's a lot of, like, misdirection and anyway, I say it, and then later on, I'm talking about something else, and this girl yells out, we make all the people.

[1835] And I'm like, I just said that.

[1836] I said that five minutes ago.

[1837] I go, that bitch is one of those chicks that celebrates her birthday all month long, and everybody went crazy.

[1838] It's my birthday month.

[1839] But it's like, that's what I don't want to be.

[1840] I don't want to be the person that wants the attention.

[1841] No. Like, this is, it's my father's day.

[1842] It's father's day week.

[1843] The whole month is father's month.

[1844] Finally, we're getting ours.

[1845] No, no. We got it easy.

[1846] I'm the same way.

[1847] We got it easy.

[1848] Yeah.

[1849] I just want them around in the house.

[1850] Let me see your faces.

[1851] The reward is not a card or a cake.

[1852] No. The reward is actually in being a father.

[1853] It's the greatest thing ever.

[1854] Yeah, just hold my hand for a minute.

[1855] Just come up and just be like, yeah, hug me, just the little squeeze.

[1856] and we're good.

[1857] And I think they like that too.

[1858] Like, I don't, dads don't want you running through the mall, like, trying to find stuff for us.

[1859] You don't need to do that.

[1860] And also, dads buy everything anyway.

[1861] Dude, I went to the, um, King Tut exhibit.

[1862] Oh, yeah.

[1863] Downtown yesterday.

[1864] Amazing.

[1865] Oh, yeah?

[1866] It's crazy.

[1867] They have things there from 3 ,300 years ago.

[1868] Wow.

[1869] They constructed them three thousand years ago.

[1870] They have jewelry and these wooden boats that they found in King Tut's temple or his tomb.

[1871] Ooh.

[1872] Yeah.

[1873] And they, um, wow.

[1874] See, that's a bow and arrow that they add.

[1875] Here's how stupid they are, though.

[1876] Whoever put that thing together, it says compound bow.

[1877] Hey, you fucks.

[1878] You museum fucks.

[1879] That's not a compound bow.

[1880] Okay?

[1881] It's just not.

[1882] It's a traditional bow, you asshole.

[1883] A compound bow has cams on it and it works on a totally different system.

[1884] The fact that you fucking people are running a goddamn museum and you don't know what a compound bow is really pisses me off.

[1885] Right now there's a guy with glasses.

[1886] I took a photo of it.

[1887] We just thought it was a bow and arrow.

[1888] I took a photo of it and I took a photo of what it says, what it says there, because I was like legitimately angry.

[1889] I was reading this thing where it says compound bow.

[1890] Here it says, this is what it says.

[1891] It says, gilded wooden compound bow with glass and calcite inlay.

[1892] It's not a compound bow.

[1893] Well, gee, Mr. Roken, we thought it with a bow and arrow.

[1894] It's a ceremonial bow.

[1895] A compound bow is like one of those bows that I have in the back.

[1896] This is a very new modern creation, you fuckheads.

[1897] I love how you're in this big Egyptian thing with Tutankham, and you're like, obsessed with the bow and arrow.

[1898] Well, I do get obsessed with it because it means a lot to you.

[1899] Well, yeah, and it makes me angry.

[1900] You're wearing an archery shirt right now.

[1901] Nobody has archery shirts.

[1902] Nobody wears archery shirts.

[1903] I fucking practice every day, dude.

[1904] To me, I'm a person who's, that's like, if I was looking at a jujitsu diagram and they said, this is kung fu.

[1905] I'd be like, hey, you fucks.

[1906] Yeah, this is important.

[1907] This is Brazilian jiu -jitsu.

[1908] Wait, could you go back to that?

[1909] Yeah, that's boomerangs.

[1910] I love boomerangs.

[1911] They have boomerangs, though, but the boomerangs, the shape of them, they were not designed to come back.

[1912] It's interesting.

[1913] I wonder, like, when they figured out, like, that was designed to.

[1914] as a weapon, but not enough of a curve for it to return to the thrower.

[1915] So it's just meant to hit somebody a hundred yards away?

[1916] Just a good, you know, way to throw something and hit it.

[1917] I love boomerangs.

[1918] They're pretty dope.

[1919] Oh, they're cool.

[1920] It's a cool design.

[1921] Oh, I would go find open fields and, whew -shu -ch -w -ch -w -you -you -you -you -you -don.

[1922] You don't catch it, like, it doesn't come right back.

[1923] It comes back and, like, sails slowly down, like, in a spiral at the end.

[1924] You know what's fucked up, though, about this King Tut exhibit?

[1925] bit is you really got the sense that he was an inbred.

[1926] First of all, his, the shape of his head was all fucked up.

[1927] He had a club foot.

[1928] Like, he was inbred.

[1929] He had two children that were all mummified with him that were stillborn.

[1930] And he married his sister.

[1931] His father had a baby with someone else.

[1932] And then he married his half sister.

[1933] Ew.

[1934] He was banging his half sister.

[1935] Oh.

[1936] What they did, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, They were constantly inbreeding in the royal families to try to keep the bloodline pure and to try to keep all the money in the family.

[1937] Oh, boy.

[1938] Yeah.

[1939] That's weird.

[1940] Dude, did you ever see his head?

[1941] What his head was shaped like?

[1942] Uh -uh.

[1943] Jamie, pull up a photo of King Tuts.

[1944] King Tud's bean head.

[1945] Skull.

[1946] He had this weird -shaped, deformed skull and a club foot and all the depictions of his body.

[1947] Yeah.

[1948] Oh, weird.

[1949] Yeah, his head, like, look how big his head, like, stuck up in the back.

[1950] Oh, weird.

[1951] He was essentially inbred.

[1952] Like, there was something wrong with him.

[1953] Was he a good king?

[1954] He was only around for a little while.

[1955] He was a, it's just because we found his stuff.

[1956] I mean, it's not like he had that much global impact, or did he?

[1957] That's a good question.

[1958] I'm not, I'm not sure.

[1959] But the story is amazing of how they found it.

[1960] And the exhibit, they have this IMAX movie that goes along with the exhibit.

[1961] Oh, yeah.

[1962] It's pretty fucking badass.

[1963] Because the IMAX screen is gigantic, right?

[1964] Yeah.

[1965] So when you're there, you get a real sense of how big these structures actually are.

[1966] Right.

[1967] But they were looking for it for five years.

[1968] This guy, this British guy, and this kid named Hussein, who was the, like, he would get water for all the workers.

[1969] He was clearing, like, he had these water pots, and they'd set them into the ground so that people could come scoop water while they were digging and trying to find these.

[1970] Yeah.

[1971] While they were trying to find this tomb.

[1972] And he found a step.

[1973] He put the water bottle down, and he cleared some dirt away, and he found this flat rock just randomly.

[1974] That flat rock was one of the stairs that led down to the tomb.

[1975] And it was the only tomb that they ever found that was completely untouched.

[1976] Really?

[1977] Yeah.

[1978] All the grave robbers.

[1979] Yeah, grave robbers had found every other tomb.

[1980] Oh, really?

[1981] The tombs were miles away from the pyramids.

[1982] because I mean they probably had tombs in the pyramids that were raided and then they realized after a while like look we got to hide these things right so they took them way far out miles and miles away and they they put them in these like hillsides and they but then thieves found them there too geez so was that one like underground did they build it that way or over time no it was underground it was underground yeah yeah wow that's amazing it's amazing what a cool way to discover something yeah yeah dude one kid and he was the first one in the tomb too because he was tiny so when they busted the hole they busted a hole through the wall and he climbed in with a light and like showing around and you see anything down there billy well yeah that's part of the film is the archaeologist like looking through the hole and seeing like the gold and all this different stuff when they first chipped through the hole imagine something like that oh my god thousands and thousands of years completely untouched amazing oh it's amazing and then you take that one thing and a big giant rock All starts rolling after you.

[1983] Whoa, like Indiana Jones?

[1984] That's remarkable.

[1985] The exhibit is really interesting because, like, they had like a glove, a linen glove that was 3 ,000 years old.

[1986] Really?

[1987] Yeah, and you're looking at this linen glove and they had sandals.

[1988] They had the sarcophagus and sandals.

[1989] Like he had like these sort of, you know, decorative sandals.

[1990] So how long were they making that stuff even before then, if that's 3 ,000 years?

[1991] Thousands of years.

[1992] So even before that?

[1993] I had a guy on really recently.

[1994] Dr. Robert Schock from Boston University, and he's a geologist, and he is one of the, he's one of the first people to propose the idea, like, one of the first, like, real scholars to propose the idea that the Sphinx is far, far older than people think it is, and that it's not from 2 ,500 BC, but it's from way before that, perhaps maybe 10 ,000 years old than that, because it has water erosion, all of it, that can only have come from thousands of years of rainfall.

[1995] Yeah, dude, it's crazy So it's the implication of that The implication is there was Well, his take on it Which is really interesting And he really scared the shit out of me It blew my mind Mass coronal ejections So something from the sun Some gigantic solar flare That created Unbelievable havoc on Earth He was talking about Lightning storms that were like the lightning coming down like sheets of rain in a hurricane and that it like just covered parts of the earth with lightning and killed everything and killed off mass just mass numbers of human beings large mammals all that it's responsible for there's a there's a big mass extinction that we really don't understand what caused somewhere in that range of around 10 ,000 years ago right And he attributes that to this mass coronal ejection and that this, this huge sun, this burst of energy from the sun caused these unbelievable chaotic storms that killed, who knows, I said so is it like a thunderstorm times a hundred?

[1996] He's like, no, times a million.

[1997] He was like sheets of, sheets of lightning coming down like rain in a hurricane.

[1998] Oh, my God.

[1999] Just imagine lightning just cooking the earth.

[2000] For like a long period of time or just like one big storm?

[2001] Long period of time.

[2002] So the sun just kept shooting stuff?

[2003] People that started living in caves and they built these dwellings inside the earth because that was where they could survive.

[2004] They could survive where the radiation wasn't coming down.

[2005] It wasn't going through the earth to get to them.

[2006] So houses, tents, anything that you lived in that was outside, those people were dead.

[2007] The only people that lived or the people that lived that had their houses carved into hillside.

[2008] Is there evidence of this?

[2009] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[2010] Evidence, geological evidence, which is what his...

[2011] Is it a mainstream thing or is his kind of...

[2012] Well, the fact that that's possible is mainstream, whether or not it happened then is up for debate.

[2013] It's also the end of the ice age.

[2014] And he thinks that's the reason why all these ice caps melted.

[2015] Right.

[2016] This was what caused it.

[2017] Oh, that was part of that.

[2018] Cause a massive shift in the...

[2019] Massive shift in the global temperature.

[2020] Jeez.

[2021] That's crazy.

[2022] I was just reading a thing about the ice age yesterday in the time.

[2023] times that uh about how the ice changed manhattan all the five boroughs like that's kind of where the ice kind of came down to was around there and seeing how it receded and what it left behind we were but but the civilizations weren't really living around then right what do you mean during the ice age of course they were they were well there were some civilizations i mean there's established civilizations like there's some structures well there's some structures there's that have been absolutely linked to that time.

[2024] A big one is Gobeckley -Tepe, which is in Turkey.

[2025] And they've absolutely dated that to 12 ,000 years ago.

[2026] So what's fascinating about that is they didn't know that people were capable of building these gigantic stone structures 12 ,000 years ago.

[2027] And they've only uncovered a very small amount of Gobeckley -Tepe.

[2028] It's a huge, huge site.

[2029] So do you think that there's still tons of stuff we could discover that out there hasn't been tapped yet, like under the oceans or?

[2030] Yeah, for sure.

[2031] Yeah, well, if people, if these guys are right, and here's the thing, they, what they think is that there's been, there was a big dip.

[2032] And I forget what his term that he used to describe it, but it was, um, the, there was a dark age that was created by these mass ejections.

[2033] And that the civilization, particularly in Egypt, had reached a very high level of sophistication.

[2034] when they were capable of building these gigantic stone structures and they had all this amazing architecture and engineering or to move these huge stones.

[2035] And then there was a big die -off and that for thousands of years, people essentially were knocked back almost down into the Stone Age and then regrouped.

[2036] But this cataclysmic story, this story is in Noah's Ark. It's in the Epic of Gilgamesh, which is from Sumer, which is where Iraq is.

[2037] Like they all talk about these great floods and chaos and God punished everyone and everyone died.

[2038] This is like a part of human history, which is many different versions of it.

[2039] Of like right what exactly happened.

[2040] Yeah, but he's pointing to geological evidence, which is fascinating because at one point in time, around 9 ,000 BC, the Nile Valley was not all sand the way we see it now, but it was a tropical rainforest.

[2041] And so for thousands of years before, that it was you know torrential downpours and rain and that all this was the reason why the sphinx enclosure has these deep fissures that are indicative of rainfall and water erosion for thousands of years not just instantaneous flooding from some giant event but from thousands of years of rainfall of rain just constant rain yeah and so that would predate the the idea is the current established timeline is that the great sphinx was created somewhere around the time that they believed the great pyramids were created.

[2042] Now, the great pyramid that they've done carbon dating that indicates that that was somewhere around 2 ,500 BC.

[2043] He thinks that that was built over an older site that was from many, many years before that.

[2044] And he has all these photos of similar construction methods that they've done where they've taken a really old site from maybe many, many thousands of years.

[2045] ago and put something over that like sort of like the Greeks did build on top yeah with the parthenon and the acropolis right they built it over the acropolis right over an old thing yes that they don't even know where the fuck it came from you don't know what where that old thing where it's from so the idea is that this old thing in Egypt in particular is a product of an old civilization from many many many thousands years ago so long ago that the distance and the gap between the people who built the pyramids and the people who originally built the sphinx is far greater than our distance between us and the people built the pyramids oh really yeah oh man that's amazing this is how fucking crazy it is it's so crazy but think about this cleopatra is she's closer to the creation of the iPhone than she is to the creation of the pyramids that's the real deal that I mean that's yes that's established Egyptologists archaeologists, this is not controversial.

[2046] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[2047] This is just a fact.

[2048] And then they think, but they think that at 2 ,500 BC, that represents only the new construction in Egypt, and that before that, if you go to 10 ,000 BC and before, there was a whole another civilization there.

[2049] Jeez, that's amazing.

[2050] Yeah, it's amazing.

[2051] And that this is when, 10 ,000 plus years ago, this is when these cataclysmic events happened and all these people died off, and much of what they knew back then was lost.

[2052] and then they rebuilt.

[2053] What's so scary about that is that it sounds like it could happen any day.

[2054] Oh, it certainly could happen.

[2055] Something could happen with the sun and all of a sudden we're dealing with some other, right?

[2056] Some big solar flare comes at us and we're in trouble.

[2057] What did it say, Jamet?

[2058] There was an article in Business Insider about coronal mass injections.

[2059] What's coronal mean?

[2060] Go back to that?

[2061] This is a different thing, though.

[2062] Coronal sounds like eyeball.

[2063] What did you just have?

[2064] High speed, solar winds, and.

[2065] Increased lightning strikes on Earth.

[2066] Yeah, but what was that last one, though?

[2067] Coronal mass ejection.

[2068] Was it, do you have to subscribe or something?

[2069] I don't know.

[2070] It was, I had it up for five minutes, and I just went back.

[2071] But it was saying that, like, they could hit us in a matter of - Go back to that article.

[2072] Come on, we want that article.

[2073] It's not letting me go back to it.

[2074] What you mean?

[2075] What's it doing?

[2076] It's not, it's acting where I've got to find it here.

[2077] It's King Tut.

[2078] This is what happened with Indiana Jones.

[2079] Then he can't go back.

[2080] Why isn't it?

[2081] There is.

[2082] Here, we're shockingly unprepared for an extreme, oh.

[2083] It looks like.

[2084] Like you're using an ad blocker.

[2085] Just disable the ad blogger.

[2086] Business Insider, isn't it?

[2087] Here it goes.

[2088] We're shockingly unprepared for an extreme weather event that could fire Earth's power grid.

[2089] Now, that's something that, what did he say it happened?

[2090] What year did he say that it had?

[2091] You don't want that to happen.

[2092] Carrington event was in 1859.

[2093] Yeah, an 1859 event.

[2094] Oh, yeah?

[2095] If it happened today, it would completely, and this is a documented event.

[2096] If it happened, I mean, where, like, Transformers blew up, all these different, where they would do the Morse code and shit.

[2097] Yeah, yeah.

[2098] All that shit fucking exploded and exploded because of this coronal mass ejection or a gigantic solar flare.

[2099] And this is a documented one.

[2100] And they're saying if this documented one, this caring event happened today, we'd be fucked.

[2101] All the electric would, phew.

[2102] Yeah.

[2103] We wouldn't have to go on Twitter anymore.

[2104] Yeah.

[2105] That would be amazing.

[2106] Yeah.

[2107] But you also wouldn't be able to go to the grocery store.

[2108] Oh.

[2109] And your Tesla wouldn't work.

[2110] But I would get my compound bow and go hunt for my food.

[2111] Not that fucking piece of shit in the museum.

[2112] That's a cool compound boom.

[2113] That's so crazy that we've...

[2114] What's crazy is that these civilizations were able to build up and they get knocked all the way back.

[2115] And then build up a similar way, right?

[2116] If you're talking about the Egypt one.

[2117] Yeah.

[2118] Right?

[2119] They came back kind of in a similar way.

[2120] If the pyramids and the sphinx are that far apart.

[2121] Yeah.

[2122] That there was something in the DNA, in the brain space that was that evolved, they tried to come back the same way.

[2123] Well, if not the same way, in a similar way.

[2124] I mean, some of the people survived, right?

[2125] And some of the people that survived must have had some knowledge of the construction.

[2126] They pass it down from generation and generation.

[2127] But, you know, you're dealing with thousands and thousands of years where they weren't building things like that.

[2128] And then they figured out a way to do it again.

[2129] Yeah.

[2130] It's interesting.

[2131] How the fuck did they be so, how did they become so smart?

[2132] That's what's interesting.

[2133] Because the great pyramid...

[2134] Genetics.

[2135] Perhaps.

[2136] Maybe they just said superior genetics, but it's also what they were showing in this video that I watched in the IMAX thing yesterday, was that the area was so unbelievably fertile, that there was so much of an opportunity for them to grow food, and there were so many animals there for them to hunt and, you know, in agriculture, that they had a chance to sort of establish a civilization because it was such a rich area with natural resources.

[2137] established civilization, and that civilization just kept advancing and moving forward, and that it was all eventually weakened by civil turmoil, that civil turmoil, then the pharaohs lost their power, and as the pharaohs lost their power, then they were invaded.

[2138] From across the sea?

[2139] Yeah, well, no, from inside of Africa.

[2140] Oh, from inside Africa?

[2141] Yeah, if you look at, yeah, the Nubians took over Egypt at one point in time.

[2142] Damn, Nubians.

[2143] Sons of bitches.

[2144] Well, different, you know, different people in Africa would, going over there and looking at all the shit they had and also the library of alexander was burned by the muslims was it a lush area like when i picture egypt i picture like a desert no is it no the nile right now is a river right and the river like where the wetlands were it's filled with animals and they grew food there right and what they're thinking by this predating of the sphinx with dr robert chalk which his his proposal is that it was initially created back when it was rainforest and was unbelievably lush so incredibly fertile and then slowly the climate shifted and that climate shift could have corresponded with that coronal mass ejection so it could have been some sort of a massive event that's slowly or even rapidly shifted the climate I would like to go over and see it I always I'm a little scared to go there too right me both buddy yeah that would be a cool I mean where what else would you want to see that's that profound dude when they're walking when you watch the iMacs movie i can't recommend enough it's quick too if you yeah short attention span it's like 45 minutes right but when you watch them walk um next to these enormous statues yeah i mean these fucking statues of the pharaohs are so big that you see these little tiny people walking by and you realize like oh my god right look at this these people had done something unbelievable yeah this the pyramids and the sphinx there's so much of that stuff there's so much and why just there exactly right exactly what did they figure it out yeah how did they what happened why were they the only ones at the time i mean it has to be connected to resources right because if you go today there's parts of the world where people are you know and some impoverished parts of africa in particular where they don't have a lot of resources or people are fucked right and they don't have any opportunity and they're in a terrible place and it's just really really shitty time to be alive you're not advancing At the same time, you can go to, like, the Bay Area and go to some artisanal cheese shop and ride around your electric car and, you know what I mean?

[2145] Yeah, no, exactly.

[2146] We're experiencing that on earth simultaneously.

[2147] Yeah, it's just purely what's available.

[2148] Yeah.

[2149] Yeah, like, and what mines, like, how many Elon Musks did they have in the Egyptian times?

[2150] Right, because it was just us, you and I are, we're kind of dumb.

[2151] Right.

[2152] Let's be honest.

[2153] Yeah, not that right.

[2154] Yeah, we're not inventing tunnels.

[2155] underneath the fucking...

[2156] We're just getting by.

[2157] Yeah.

[2158] If we smoked a joint and started talking about this is what we'd do, dude, would make fucking tunnels and then your car goes in the tunnel and it shoots around.

[2159] Dude, I love that idea.

[2160] Fucking crazy, bro.

[2161] Fucking love that idea.

[2162] But nobody would take us seriously and nobody would let us dig.

[2163] And then we'd just fall asleep.

[2164] Yeah.

[2165] Just forget about it.

[2166] Yeah.

[2167] But there must have been a bunch of Elon Musks back in the Egyptian time.

[2168] Well, that's what's amazing is like there's this, there's like this genius IQ where like all the magic happens you know like where the Einstein's live where the like those even yeah where those big leaps kind of happen and everybody else could be really smart but not to that level where you're actually shifting the world right you know and maybe that's what happened maybe there was just one genetic freak in the Egyptian world it was there because their diet and stuff they were able to survive and it could have been a slow process too because you're dealing with thousands of years of prosperity, too.

[2169] And over thousands of years, they have many, many, many generations to think things through.

[2170] I mean, think about what's happened on this continent just over 200 years.

[2171] Just 200.

[2172] Go back 200 years ago, nothing's here.

[2173] Yeah.

[2174] That's crazy.

[2175] That's crazy.

[2176] Just 200 years ago.

[2177] Yeah, go to 18.

[2178] So where are we going to be like thousands, 2 ,000, 3 ,000 years ahead?

[2179] Here, just here.

[2180] Especially if you let Elon Musk make his tunnels everywhere.

[2181] There's going to be so many tunnels.

[2182] So many tunnels.

[2183] It's going to be awesome.

[2184] You're going to get to the Grand Canyon in 10 minutes.

[2185] A little pod.

[2186] But that is, what is this, Jamie?

[2187] That's all there was in 1818 of the United States.

[2188] Missouri Territory.

[2189] That's nuts.

[2190] It's only 100 years ago.

[2191] Look how much they own, look how much Spain owned.

[2192] New Spain.

[2193] Vice royalty of New Spain is all Texas, California, Arizona, Nevada.

[2194] Yeah.

[2195] That looks like.

[2196] Montana, Colorado.

[2197] Then look at the Oregon County.

[2198] Oregon Country.

[2199] Wow.

[2200] Shared with United Kingdom.

[2201] Shared with United Kingdom.

[2202] Nobody had the Oregon Country.

[2203] Michigan Territory.

[2204] Missouri Territory.

[2205] Michigan was on both sides of the lake.

[2206] Look at that.

[2207] Is it?

[2208] Yeah.

[2209] So Michigan is on the left and the right of the lake?

[2210] The U .P. Upper Peninsula.

[2211] Oh, but not the right side.

[2212] where it says Michigan territory.

[2213] That's not Michigan anymore.

[2214] That's Michigan.

[2215] The other side is Minneapolis.

[2216] It's where Detroit and all that stuff is and then there's the upper peninsula up above Wisconsin.

[2217] Right, but the other side is not Michigan.

[2218] They're not both Michigan.

[2219] Right.

[2220] That's Minneapolis.

[2221] Right here it is.

[2222] Up there in the corner.

[2223] Yeah, yeah, but where it says Michigan territory.

[2224] Oh, this Wisconsin.

[2225] Right.

[2226] That's what I'm saying.

[2227] Oh, my bad.

[2228] Sorry.

[2229] It says it right there.

[2230] It says Michigan on both ones.

[2231] Jamie was just hit with a solar flare.

[2232] He just lost his mind.

[2233] Look at it as disputed between Massachusetts and the colony of New Brunswick.

[2234] So that's Maine, right?

[2235] Because they have Massachusetts.

[2236] Everyone's just grabbing.

[2237] But Maine was like, we're not sure what we're going to do with it.

[2238] What?

[2239] We might keep it.

[2240] We might not.

[2241] You've realized how fucking far up there Maine is.

[2242] There's a lot of mosquitoes up there.

[2243] Like Maine, like Massachusetts, when you look at like where Massachusetts is.

[2244] Yeah.

[2245] You know, and then you go above Massachusetts.

[2246] Yeah, Maine's big.

[2247] First place that gets sunlight in the morning.

[2248] fucking giant man yeah huge right and where's new york new york right down there look at right next a little vermont look how new york goes that's yeah so look at massachusetts so massachusetts was two places look it was massachusetts and it was main right look at that because there's two massachusetts then just like there's two michigans era i'm gonna keep all of it so this is 1818 i want all of it is that ted kennedy it's my kennedy wow look at All that, man. Alabama territory, Georgia, South Carolina.

[2249] So all those fucked up southern states are still there.

[2250] Tennessee.

[2251] All filled with Native Americans.

[2252] We just came in and like, let me have this.

[2253] I'm taking that.

[2254] Well, Texas, man. It's so brutal.

[2255] I mean, Texas, they were fighting off the Cheyenne.

[2256] I mean, those ranchers, that was not established territory.

[2257] That's one of the reasons why Texans are so fucking hard, man. They made a fight.

[2258] Yeah, they were at one point in time, they were a republic before they were a state they were like this weird thing where they were kind of like not even a part of the united states oh really yeah just so wild that just happened yeah yeah we're talking thousands of years for your little toots and commons yeah your little fucking the little guy with his club foot the little bonehead yeah wow thousand that was thousands of years after king tut people were taking wagons and going across the route just going yeah yeah how crazy that think think of that three thousand years later people are still shooting bows and arrows at each other yeah three thousand years later just completely wide open thousand yeah so why right so why weren't the native americans before we got here putting up those big statues well they lived a very different life yeah they lived a nomadic hunter gatherer life and they have this incredible spiritual connection to the land and to the animals that they hunted and they had a very very fascinating.

[2259] I mean, there's a bunch of different of course Native American cultures, but they had a very fascinating connection to their earth and to the animals and the worship that they had, the reverence they had for the animals and for life.

[2260] The trees.

[2261] It's just crazy when you think about how people were living in Europe at the same time.

[2262] Yeah.

[2263] Yeah, exactly.

[2264] Just completely a totally different thing.

[2265] Yeah.

[2266] Getting syphilis, wearing powdered wigs, banging their sisters.

[2267] Yeah, so when they showed up, and had gunpowder and all the rest of this, the Native Americans didn't stand a chance.

[2268] What's crazy to me, too, is that how many people that were Westerners, they joined Native American tribes and were living with them.

[2269] Oh, really?

[2270] Like Kevin Costner?

[2271] Yeah, it was common.

[2272] It happened, and no one moved the other way.

[2273] Like, no one went the, like, no one from the Native American cultures decided, hey, I'm going to move to the city.

[2274] No, those are the saddest pictures of all time when you see those Native Americans put in suits and ties and hats and standing there having to take pictures.

[2275] Oh, those pictures are hard shoes in a city.

[2276] Oh, brutal.

[2277] It's so bad.

[2278] You know what must have been really interesting?

[2279] You know, we're talking about your VW, which was from, you know, 20 years after the war with the Nazis.

[2280] Yeah.

[2281] What about those Wild Bill Wild West shows?

[2282] Yeah.

[2283] They had those Wild West shows where they had men who had killed a bunch of colonists.

[2284] Yeah.

[2285] And like there's a guy, I think his name was Maul.

[2286] It was this giant Indian guy who was this fucking murderer who'd killed a bunch of the settlers.

[2287] And he was, they would tour with him.

[2288] Wild Bill would tour with this guy and they would do on their Wild West show, they'd shoot guns and put on a show.

[2289] Pretend to fight each other kind of things.

[2290] Well, for people it was like a recreation of what it must have been like.

[2291] When they, you know, captured territory from the Native Americans.

[2292] Oh, my God.

[2293] They do these wild west shows, man. That's how they made their living.

[2294] Jeez.

[2295] It became a big thing.

[2296] It was like the movies.

[2297] See if you pull up the Wild West shows from the 1800s.

[2298] Yeah, look up.

[2299] A fascinating time, man. Is that crazy?

[2300] Because it's just, just after this had all happened.

[2301] That was how you were telling stories.

[2302] Yeah.

[2303] Nobody knew about it.

[2304] You'd get your little weird newspaper.

[2305] Dude.

[2306] You read a little story.

[2307] No one really knew what was going on.

[2308] Imagine how little you knew.

[2309] knew what was going on back then.

[2310] You knew nothing.

[2311] You knew nothing.

[2312] Yeah.

[2313] Town Cryer would come in.

[2314] Here you, hear ye.

[2315] Maine gave up the top of it.

[2316] It's now Massachusetts.

[2317] No one knew anything back then.

[2318] Nothing.

[2319] Look at that.

[2320] Pony Bill's shows the only genuine Wild West.

[2321] He -ho.

[2322] Touring America this season.

[2323] Over 1 ,000 people and horses employed.

[2324] Wow.

[2325] Every equestrian nation in the world represented.

[2326] Wow.

[2327] Two performances daily, weird and startling free street parade.

[2328] Look at that name, Calamity Jane.

[2329] I love this.

[2330] This is just a show business guy.

[2331] I wonder if there was a comedian in it.

[2332] Wild West shows, man. And this was like early 1900s, late 1800s.

[2333] Yeah, when was it?

[2334] It says 192, I see there?

[2335] 1903.

[2336] 1903.

[2337] Wow.

[2338] So this is, you know.

[2339] That'd be pretty cool, like for a young kid.

[2340] 50 years after the, you know, they were still going to war with the Native Americans.

[2341] Is that a picture of it over there?

[2342] Yeah, there's another one.

[2343] They had a reenactment.

[2344] They did like Custer's Last Stand and train robberies and stuff.

[2345] Imagine people would go to see that, like 1901 in Buffalo, New York.

[2346] You had no movies.

[2347] He had nothing.

[2348] This was your movie.

[2349] Oh, my God, it must have been amazing.

[2350] And you still, like, had to try to make sense of it all.

[2351] Like, what happened?

[2352] Yeah.

[2353] How did we get here?

[2354] Especially, like you said, having the real guy there, who you know could at one point just turn on everybody and start killing the people in the audience.

[2355] Yeah.

[2356] Yeah, there was one guy who was this giant.

[2357] See if you could find that Native American Wild West shows.

[2358] I think his name was Mall.

[2359] Mall.

[2360] I think that was his name.

[2361] He's trying to remember his name.

[2362] Look at Buffalo Bill.

[2363] Look at that.

[2364] Just a showman.

[2365] And sitting bull.

[2366] He was a movie star.

[2367] Hanging out together.

[2368] Jeez.

[2369] Jesus Christ.

[2370] Look, I'm sorry we took all your land, but just hear me out.

[2371] I've got an idea.

[2372] We put some makeup on you.

[2373] other and we go out and we do these shows listen we got whiskey got a lot of white women a white women a lot of whiskey we tour around we make money we charge these dopes we do two shows a day and we're out do you think women were like crazy these guys they'd see them like oh my god look at them looking like probably scalp people yes he avenges custer by killing and scalping yellow hair also called yellow hand which you called the first scalp for custer jean Jeez.

[2374] Yeah, big -ass show.

[2375] But here's the thing, man. That just happened.

[2376] All of this just happened.

[2377] We're talking about 1900.

[2378] I know.

[2379] 118 years ago.

[2380] It's almost a human lifespan.

[2381] Yeah.

[2382] It's like this is this, this convergence of human beings is so recent.

[2383] What killed these more probably like movies or in radio?

[2384] Yeah.

[2385] People like, ah, for sure.

[2386] It looks like a movie production.

[2387] Like when you see thousands people.

[2388] Plus, they probably shot each other a bunch.

[2389] I'm sure there was some venereal disease involved.

[2390] Oh, yeah.

[2391] Yeah, they probably all died of fucking herpes or something.

[2392] Didn't they, they had guns.

[2393] They were actually shooting guns off.

[2394] They said they had, like, competitions and shoot off.

[2395] That's a three to four hour show.

[2396] Well, that's why the Western was such a popular movie for decades because it was so fresh in people's minds.

[2397] I mean, you had grandparents that, you know, knew this stuff.

[2398] Right.

[2399] Right, when you think about like the 1950s Westerns, they're 100 years after the fact.

[2400] Yeah.

[2401] Right, that's like us watching something about something that happened during the Depression.

[2402] Yeah.

[2403] Like once upon a time in America or something like that.

[2404] Yeah, yeah.

[2405] Yeah, right?

[2406] Pium, phew!

[2407] That is the coolest.

[2408] But what's so funny about it, it's just show business.

[2409] It's like the beginning of show business.

[2410] Yeah, well, he figured out.

[2411] The posters, I mean, all of it.

[2412] How much of it has really changed?

[2413] You know, you put on a big show, you make a cool poster, you get these people to come and buy tickets.

[2414] 2 .5 million tickets sold.

[2415] Wow.

[2416] Wow.

[2417] You know what's really fucked up, dude?

[2418] There was no comedy back then.

[2419] No stand -up.

[2420] Well, that's what I was going to ask.

[2421] Mark Twain, when was Mark Twain running around?

[2422] Because he was kind of like the first stand -up.

[2423] He would go do these shows, and he writes about it like it's a stand -up performance.

[2424] When was he traipsing around?

[2425] Well, they do say that he was probably the first.

[2426] Yeah, he was talking about things that didn't work for a laugh.

[2427] Oh, wow.

[2428] Yeah.

[2429] Howell Holbrook's touring as him.

[2430] He's always touring as him.

[2431] I didn't know that it was like a thing.

[2432] Well, when did he live?

[2433] What was the lifespan of Twain?

[2434] So that's an interesting case.

[2435] You know, in Mark Twain, they use the N -word all the time in Huckleberry Finn.

[2436] Oh, yeah, big time.

[2437] And they're removing that now.

[2438] They're removing it?

[2439] Removing it.

[2440] Who is?

[2441] They're editing it and removing it from the books.

[2442] The publishers?

[2443] Yeah.

[2444] Oh, come on.

[2445] That's, I mean, you want to learn about a culture, learn about the time.

[2446] Well, one of the characters in Huckleberry Finn, one of the main characters, was nigger jim yeah knows his friend yeah yeah that they removed that the end word really yeah that's not weird accurate well that's well that's well that's sanitizing history and that's mistake because you don't learn from that Jamie pull that up pulled up the censoring of Tom Sawyer or Huckleberry Finn Mark Twain had to build a little writing room out in his out on his lawn so he could smoke his cigars out there because his wife wouldn't let him smoke cigars.

[2447] So he built himself a little shed.

[2448] So he'd go sit out there and smoke.

[2449] Good for him.

[2450] I just want to see when his lifespan was.

[2451] Old Twain.

[2452] He was funny.

[2453] You ever read Twain?

[2454] Yes, he's very funny.

[2455] Really?

[2456] Like cutting.

[2457] What does it say here, Jamie?

[2458] Place the word with the word slave.

[2459] Whoa.

[2460] Okay, look at this.

[2461] A new effort to sanitize Huckleberry Finn comes from Alan Gribben, a professional.

[2462] of English at Auburn University at Montgomery, Alabama, who has produced a new edition of Twain's novel that replaces that word with slave.

[2463] Appears in the book more than 200 times was a common racial epithet of, okay, duh, used by Twain as part of his characters, a vernacular speech, and as a reflection of the mid -19th century social attitudes along the Mississippi River.

[2464] There is a...

[2465] So an effort, but that doesn't mean that it's been done.

[2466] There's a ride at Disneyland.

[2467] I want to say it's either Splash Mountain or I think it is Splash Mountain.

[2468] Splash Mountain at Disneyland, which was based on a really racist old cartoon that you can't get anymore called Southern Tales.

[2469] I think it's called Southern Tales.

[2470] No, it's the Himalayan thing?

[2471] No, no, no. That's the Matterhorn.

[2472] Oh, Splash Mountain.

[2473] With the Breyer.

[2474] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[2475] Right, right, right.

[2476] Yeah.

[2477] Yeah.

[2478] It was very racist.

[2479] Briar Bear, Breyer Fox.

[2480] Yeah, Breyer Fox.

[2481] Yeah, Breer Fox.

[2482] Brear Fox.

[2483] Yeah, that whole thing is like, it's a southern ride.

[2484] And there's all these singing ducks.

[2485] And we went with a guide, and the guy was explaining to us that this was all based on a really racist old thing that you can only get, like, bootleg copies of now.

[2486] Ah, really?

[2487] Yeah.

[2488] It's like super racist old cartoon.

[2489] Well, they had, like, the tar baby.

[2490] Right, the tar baby thing Well, what is it?

[2491] It's Southern Tales, right?

[2492] Is that what it's called?

[2493] I'm trying to find the name.

[2494] I just keep seeing Breyer -Fox listed a bunch of times.

[2495] Song of the South telling the Song of the South.

[2496] I think that's the name of it.

[2497] I think it's called Song of the South.

[2498] I think that's it.

[2499] I think that's the name of it now that I think about it.

[2500] Yeah.

[2501] But it was a paneller super racist.

[2502] Yeah, I believe it.

[2503] There's a lot of bad stuff back then.

[2504] What is it?

[2505] Is this it?

[2506] Is this it?

[2507] Zippity Duda.

[2508] Yeah, this is Zippity Duda.

[2509] Zippity Duda.

[2510] Yeah, this is Zippity Duda.

[2511] They sing this in the movie.

[2512] Zippity doda.

[2513] So why is this racist?

[2514] Well, that's what they're asking.

[2515] Is this racist?

[2516] Song of the South Carolina.

[2517] Well, right now it's just a guy singing.

[2518] Yeah.

[2519] I don't think this is the racist part.

[2520] I think the reason why you can get this online is because it's not the racist stuff.

[2521] Uh -huh.

[2522] Because this is just a guy singing, Mr. Bluebird.

[2523] on my shoulder.

[2524] Zippitya.

[2525] Mow, my.

[2526] So Song of the South, the move, see if you can find Song of the South.

[2527] This is what I, this is the clip that popped up when I grew up.

[2528] Yeah.

[2529] 81 % liked it.

[2530] It's like, look at Rotten Tomatoes.

[2531] 7 .3 on IMDB.

[2532] So it's on IMDB.

[2533] About 1946.

[2534] Wow.

[2535] Maybe it wasn't.

[2536] Mark Twain died in 1910.

[2537] So that means that he was walking around as an old dude doing these performances, you know, late 1800s.

[2538] Yeah.

[2539] And so maybe that was kind of the beginning of stand -up comedy.

[2540] Go back to that.

[2541] Go back to that page you were just on, and that Snopes article on it, where they do a fact check on the Song of the South.

[2542] Do you see it up there?

[2543] Yeah, I was going to...

[2544] What was it say?

[2545] I was going to double check it before I wanted to see what they said on the Snopes.

[2546] But it says it's true.

[2547] What does it say about it?

[2548] Can you pull it up?

[2549] I'm sorry, I thought I had it up.

[2550] Oh, A Song of the South in NWACP.

[2551] A Song of the South unavailable on video in America because of the NWACP threats.

[2552] Status, true.

[2553] Wow.

[2554] Yeah.

[2555] So is that racist?

[2556] I wonder what it was.

[2557] There was so much racist shit back then.

[2558] Breyer Rabbit.

[2559] I'm sorry.

[2560] Breyer Fox, Brear Bear Bear.

[2561] Why Brear?

[2562] What does that mean?

[2563] A briar, like stuck in a briar.

[2564] But BR -E -R -E -R -E -R.

[2565] This is what you're going to say it.

[2566] Brer rabbit, bearer fox.

[2567] Brayer bear.

[2568] So that was the idea that they're stuck in briars?

[2569] The minstrel tradition of Uncle Remus stories, the major objections to the song of the South, had to do with the live action portions.

[2570] Film been criticized both for making slavery appear pleasant and pretending slavery didn't exist, even though the film...

[2571] That's kind of you're caught in between...

[2572] Finish that.

[2573] Finish what you just said.

[2574] Even though the film, like Harris's original collection of stories, is set after the Civil War, and the abolition of slavery still as folklorist Patricia writes Yeah That's fascinating So that's kind of interesting Especially when you talk about the When you talk about the Huckleberry Finn part Like they're saying okay take that out And then this one they're saying They had an objection to making it seem like slavery didn't exist Right That's why you can't take it out of Huckleberry Finn Because you need to know that this existed We need to deal with it and understand it rather than sanitize it.

[2575] The problem is defending it.

[2576] Like, you can't, it, you really, it's almost impossible to defend that, the use of that word.

[2577] Like, if you want to defend the use of that word, you say, well, oh, we want to put that word back in a book.

[2578] People are like, what are you racist?

[2579] Right.

[2580] But you can't, you know, that this is, you talk rationally, though.

[2581] This is history, yeah, right, exactly.

[2582] You can't be rational.

[2583] Right.

[2584] There's no rationality when it comes to dangerous, forbidden words.

[2585] Right.

[2586] As you saw from the Kendrick Lamar concert.

[2587] Right.

[2588] Right?

[2589] I mean, that's...

[2590] Yeah.

[2591] I wonder what Twain would say.

[2592] Do you think that ultimately, like, this is all going to sort itself out?

[2593] Like, there's all this political correct craziness and this kind of shit that this is just a little rough patch of chaos that we get through on our way to establishing a new way of communicating with people.

[2594] A new way of appreciating each other.

[2595] And that, you know, all this, even the anti -white racism and anti -male sexism, and anti -male sexism.

[2596] and all this stuff, it's just, you know, the wave going this way, and then it'll go that way, and then it'll settle in the middle.

[2597] Kind of, yes.

[2598] And then we're learning from even these missteps, like, why can't we hate all men or, you know, anything like that.

[2599] We learn from these missteps and the outrage that goes to these missteps, and we say, oh, I understand why this woman feels this way.

[2600] She's probably abused by men and dealt with asshole men and asshole bosses and see these people like Harvey Weinstein in the mainstream media that have abused and violated and victimized women.

[2601] Yeah.

[2602] And that it's going to balance itself out.

[2603] And the only way it does is you have to have outrage and then correction.

[2604] Yeah.

[2605] I mean, that's the way history seems to go.

[2606] It seems like, you know, there's, you would think in certain ways, like, oh, we don't have to work that hard to abolish these evils.

[2607] But then evil pops up again and it feels like, okay, no, it's still here.

[2608] We still have to deal with it.

[2609] Yeah.

[2610] And you just hope at the end up like Bruno Mars.

[2611] We all look like Bruno Mars.

[2612] and everybody's happy because no one knows what anybody is.

[2613] Yeah.

[2614] Just having a good time and we're all a little darker, not totally white, not totally black, and everybody's happy.

[2615] But wait a minute, but what about white people?

[2616] I like looking at white people.

[2617] I like some white people.

[2618] I like the whole, I like the fact that we have variety in the way people look.

[2619] Like some people look like seal and some people look like, who's like a super white lady?

[2620] Like a shelly de Gaulle.

[2621] Oh, yeah.

[2622] Nicole Kidman.

[2623] Nicole Kinman.

[2624] That bitch is white as fuck.

[2625] Jessica Chastain.

[2626] Yeah, white.

[2627] So white, you're almost red.

[2628] Yeah, it is good to have a nice mix.

[2629] Fuck, man. Yeah.

[2630] It's everything.

[2631] But, you know, it's fascinating.

[2632] We're still these very tribal, you know, when you talk about all these thousands of years and what we've done and where we've come.

[2633] But there's still like this, this just instinctual tribal element to a lot of humanity.

[2634] You got to give a dick like an axe handle.

[2635] to wear your shirt like that.

[2636] Look at that shirt.

[2637] Look at his shirt all the way down to his belly butt with gold chains hanging out with a white trench coat.

[2638] Yeah.

[2639] No, you're packing.

[2640] And he's got sunglasses on at night, which is always a bold move that really only black people can pull off.

[2641] Yeah, exactly.

[2642] Just owning it.

[2643] Look at him.

[2644] Slanging dick and singing songs.

[2645] Do da, do da.

[2646] Do da.

[2647] He, um, he, um, he, You don't hear about him anymore, man. Well, you never na -na -na -na -na -da -da -da -this.

[2648] Dude, when I first moved to California, when I first got some money, I was on this television show.

[2649] One of the first things I bought is a stereo.

[2650] Yeah.

[2651] I always loved, like, good music.

[2652] So I bought the stereo, and I bought Seal.

[2653] And I remember listening to Kiss by a Rose from the grave or whatever the name of that song is.

[2654] But that song, I had never realized because I never heard it on a good stereo before, but I had these two speakers.

[2655] And, like, there's all these, like, layers and piano tunes and keys.

[2656] There's all this stuff that comes out of, you know, when you're sitting in front of, like, good speakers, you hear all the layers to the music.

[2657] And I'd be like, wow.

[2658] It was like hearing it new all over again.

[2659] Oh, it was so like hearing it new.

[2660] Yeah.

[2661] He was, I mean, I guess he still is because he's still alive, but he's so fucking talented, man. A real artist.

[2662] And so different than, like, try naming someone who sounds like seal.

[2663] Yeah.

[2664] I can't The Black Keys No No no He's a fucking original man Yeah Super Phosphorescent I don't know He's got a very Unique style Yeah There's a lot of those Well what's unique about There are a lot of artists That have this really crazy Kind of unique style But they don't become accepted From the mainstream By the mainstream Yeah Right Like there's You listen to Casey CRW in the morning and there's like a lot of weird experimental stuff but not that many people know they exist.

[2665] Seal was able to make that like a poof.

[2666] So you're one of those hipsters that listens to that channel.

[2667] You and Henry Wallens are KCRW.

[2668] Yeah.

[2669] I like KSRW in the morning.

[2670] I don't know.

[2671] Morning sounds eclectic.

[2672] I haven't listened to radio in a decade.

[2673] For real?

[2674] Yep.

[2675] Where do you get your new music?

[2676] I don't.

[2677] Oh, come on Joe.

[2678] Now I know it gets you for Father's Day.

[2679] What are we out of here?

[2680] Is a seal?

[2681] I'm going to get you some albums.

[2682] Is this recent?

[2683] No, no, no. Oh, this is VH1.

[2684] VH1 a thing anymore?

[2685] This is when he was peaking.

[2686] VH1 is still around?

[2687] It is still around.

[2688] The real housewives and all that stuff.

[2689] Yeah, I think they do.

[2690] Really?

[2691] Or maybe that's on E. I don't know.

[2692] That's Bravo.

[2693] All right, well, then I didn't know.

[2694] They used to play those like real, they do like reality shows and stuff.

[2695] Love in basketball or loving hip -hop or something.

[2696] Oh, they do that stuff.

[2697] Why did he have face bubbles?

[2698] You mean, is scarring?

[2699] Yeah.

[2700] I don't know.

[2701] Was that acne?

[2702] There's an article from three days ago that had that info.

[2703] Oh, really?

[2704] Just three days ago?

[2705] People are still thinking about it.

[2706] People are still asking.

[2707] Well, he was so good.

[2708] But his body of work is just radically dropped off.

[2709] A lesson in lupus.

[2710] He had lupus?

[2711] Oh.

[2712] Oh, wow.

[2713] That's where he's got the scarring from his face from lupus.

[2714] Oh, wow.

[2715] Interesting.

[2716] Is that amazing?

[2717] You could have that all out on your face and still be like, no, man, I am beautiful.

[2718] and you're going to think it too well not real you don't get new music you don't listen to new music I don't even know what it is come on Joe I told you I like Bruno Mars he's new yeah he's new that got to you somehow Kid Cuddy just dropped a new album this week yeah it's too moody it's too moody listen to you with your white privilege you son of a bitch you appropriating Kid Cuddy Is it moody Yeah it's the depression based music He's getting his feelings out kind of stuff Yeah, he deals with a lot of mental illness.

[2719] You don't like it.

[2720] You like people bake bread and cookies and shit.

[2721] Ah, I love it.

[2722] You don't like moody shit, do you?

[2723] I do love moody stuff.

[2724] I like, I've listened to him.

[2725] I get everyone, he's one of those that proved himself so early.

[2726] Like, I just loved it so that I just get whatever he puts out.

[2727] Wilco's like that.

[2728] He's like that.

[2729] It's just like, no. So you're into the hip hop?

[2730] Eh, a little bit.

[2731] I try, but I, you know.

[2732] Do you like older stuff?

[2733] Older hip hop.

[2734] Do you like gang star?

[2735] No. How dare you Put that book down And get the fuck out of here I'm not like Gangstar I don't even know gangstar I'm so sorry You hurt my feelings Come on Where were you in the 90s?

[2736] I was around I was wearing around In the 90s Early 90s Grateful Dead It was the end of the dead Grateful Dead Did you like the Grateful Dead Ammon Brothers Did you like the Grateful Dead Alman Brothers Ammon Brothers That's gangstar I was listening Do yourself a favor Download a decade of hits I was listening to Tribe called Quest Okay, I like them You know Here's another one that went away De La Sol They were fucking great They were so great They were great De La De La De La Sol They were amazing Dude they were great They were hot Like right when I first got into comedy Oh they were so cool Dude Three feet high and rising They just Run DMC well that's great that they released all their music but their music came from like six months I know it's really true six months of music like what the fuck man yeah but how I dis confuses me I love Nas yeah big Nas fan but here's what gets me how does someone put out something how does a group put out something that's so good yeah for a short period of time and then not like what three that's magic number They had great fucking songs They were really good And they were interesting It's hard to keep a band together And they were, yeah They were good to get high too You know what probably did them in?

[2737] Some white bitches White girls Son of a bitch Came along Fucked everything up I just don't like the way he looks at you When you sing He's fucking jealous I liked hip hop and stuff And I still do But it's a very old white guy way of doing it When I find it When I find it I know it must be over.

[2738] Like why?

[2739] That I found Kendrick, I was like, oh, so this is a done, right?

[2740] Once you find it, it's over?

[2741] Yeah.

[2742] I don't think that's enough to kill Kendrick Lamar's momentum.

[2743] No, you know.

[2744] He's got too much momentum.

[2745] Yeah.

[2746] But it was like, okay.

[2747] I mean, if it got to me, you know, and I try to listen to music, but, you know, it's different when you're young and it just hits you.

[2748] Right.

[2749] From your friends.

[2750] And I have to, like, really try and find music.

[2751] music now because I have no friends I go to Jamie and then I have to throw it through a filter I have to throw it through a yeah but he wears yeezies filter right exactly he's making the nausea's new album that comes on two weeks does it really Kanye's producing nause's new album well I'm not saying that he doesn't produce good music all right I'm just saying a sneaker suck killer Mike I like killer Mike there you go uh yeah I like a lot of stuff but you know it's a big it's a big range If you listen to bluegrass and hip hop, it means you're just kind of tasting it all.

[2752] I feel like music is a lot like movies in that people are constantly making new stuff and you can't see it all or listen to it all.

[2753] It's true.

[2754] I mean, think about movies.

[2755] They have been making movies since whenever the fuck they started making movies.

[2756] And every week they come out with new movies.

[2757] You're right.

[2758] And no one ever says, hey, folks, you know, we just realize if we keep making movies, you're never going to watch The Godfather.

[2759] You're never going to watch Taxi Driver.

[2760] You're never going to watch the classics.

[2761] So we're going to stop making movies for a while and let you fuckers catch out.

[2762] 10 years off.

[2763] No, man. We'll start up and again 10 years.

[2764] People are just cranking them out.

[2765] It's going even more because now you can just make them on your phone, like the technology to be able to make a movie.

[2766] Oh, yeah.

[2767] You can just do it.

[2768] Dude.

[2769] I mean, the phones that we have now are dog shit compared to the phones we'll have in 10 years, too.

[2770] Soderberg just shot a whole horror movie on his iPhone.

[2771] Did he really?

[2772] Yeah.

[2773] What is it?

[2774] It's called Unsane.

[2775] Whoa.

[2776] About a girl that's trapped in a mental institution.

[2777] Isn't there a horror movie that's out right now called Hereditary?

[2778] What is that about?

[2779] Is that a good one?

[2780] That's supposed to be really good on.

[2781] Oh, yeah?

[2782] Oh, yeah.

[2783] Play the trailer.

[2784] I love trailers.

[2785] I love trailers.

[2786] Oh, they're the best.

[2787] Sometimes the movie.

[2788] Sometimes the trailer's the most enjoyable part of the movie.

[2789] Sometimes they give you too much, though.

[2790] Oh, yeah.

[2791] They do that with comedies, man. They give you too many goddamn punchlines.

[2792] Give me some volume.

[2793] Crank it.

[2794] We get in trouble for this?

[2795] We get pulled from you two?

[2796] For a trailer?

[2797] We're helping them.

[2798] I mean, as long as you guys are like talking about, We're promoting them.

[2799] We can maybe stop at 30 seconds.

[2800] It looks scary.

[2801] It starts with a dollhouse.

[2802] That is a scary dollhouse.

[2803] Or an architectural design house.

[2804] A model.

[2805] Wait a matter.

[2806] A man walks in it.

[2807] It's just silly.

[2808] That was cool.

[2809] It made it look like a real room.

[2810] Sun's underground.

[2811] The production company's undergrey.

[2812] I know my mom would be very touched and probably a little suspicious.

[2813] Gabriel Burns.

[2814] in it.

[2815] My mother was a very secretive and private woman.

[2816] Uh -oh.

[2817] Uh -oh.

[2818] From the producer of the witch.

[2819] The witch, which I didn't see.

[2820] I heard it was good, though.

[2821] Oh, and what's her name?

[2822] Who's what's her name?

[2823] Because she needed to believe.

[2824] She was a very difficult woman.

[2825] Damon Wands?

[2826] Maybe explains me. Faye done away.

[2827] Faye done away.

[2828] What?

[2829] What?

[2830] Sometimes I swear I can feel them in the room.

[2831] Oh.

[2832] It's a bird.

[2833] It happens all the time.

[2834] Oh, she cut a head off a dead bird.

[2835] That bitch is crazy.

[2836] Got a kid with mental problems.

[2837] Ah, she cut with scissors.

[2838] Uncettily look at what demons.

[2839] Ooh, she looks good.

[2840] The generations, the exorcist.

[2841] You don't think I'm gonna take care of you?

[2842] But when you die.

[2843] She's coming up.

[2844] Grips you with real horror.

[2845] She wasn't altogether here.

[2846] The unspeakable kind.

[2847] This looks good.

[2848] At the end.

[2849] This looks good.

[2850] This does very scary.

[2851] I just don't want to put any more stress in my family.

[2852] That looks good.

[2853] That looks scary.

[2854] I can't believe I can't see it.

[2855] Why can't you see it?

[2856] Because I can't see anything.

[2857] When do you see things?

[2858] What are you talking about?

[2859] We just said, looking at all these movies.

[2860] Do you ever watch stuff?

[2861] Yeah, go to the movies, bro.

[2862] You do?

[2863] Yeah.

[2864] When do you do that?

[2865] Whenever I can.

[2866] Fuck's wrong with you.

[2867] You're writing books.

[2868] baking bread take a couple hours off go to the goddamn movies writing is killing i i really haven't my father said that too the other day watch it on the watch this movie on the plane like i haven't watched a movie on a plane in two years what was the movie that eddie bravo said he saw for like six minutes and then he left oh yeah some uh not it was one of the new uh it was a big blockbuster movie oh yeah was it black panther no no it was the avengers oh the uh that new one the It wasn't Deadpool, because I think it might have been the Avengers or something.

[2869] That new Avengers one that everyone loves.

[2870] But doesn't make sense that he would have walked out of that so quick.

[2871] I don't remember what it was.

[2872] Because everyone loves that one.

[2873] He doesn't make sense, period.

[2874] And he's got weird tastes.

[2875] You go to the movies?

[2876] How often you go to the movies?

[2877] Once a month?

[2878] Month.

[2879] Yeah, maybe once.

[2880] Yeah, I watched some on flights, you know, when they come out.

[2881] I don't really get too much of a chance.

[2882] You know what I really enjoyed?

[2883] That Tom Cruise movie about Barry Seal, Made in America Oh yeah?

[2884] Yeah I was pretty That was good Yeah I was pretty surprised by that That's a good goddamn movie You forget how good Tom Cruise is too He's great Yeah I mean all of the crazy talk show stuff aside That guy's amazing Well he's a Scientologist Yeah He's out of his mind He's got his own stuff But he makes good movies But people who are out of their mind Make good shit Yes That's part of the thing Yes Part of the being good at stuff Some of the times Crazy assholes They make good shit.

[2885] They really do.

[2886] A lot of times.

[2887] If you can harness it.

[2888] Word.

[2889] If you can harness it and put it into something.

[2890] It's a good movie, man. All right, I'll see that one.

[2891] Mission Impossible.

[2892] Yeah, come on.

[2893] Cruise.

[2894] This comes out in a couple weeks.

[2895] He's going to live.

[2896] That's what I hear.

[2897] Go, Cruz, go.

[2898] How he gets to the end and he lives.

[2899] He does all his own stunts.

[2900] He's going to drive that thing.

[2901] Oh, the fucking clap.

[2902] Oh, Jesus.

[2903] He just does that.

[2904] Yeah, he does a lot of stunts.

[2905] Cruz does a lot of stunts.

[2906] He does all his stunts.

[2907] I think he's 53 or 54.

[2908] And he's still doing all his own stunts?

[2909] Yeah, it's pretty badass.

[2910] Yeah, he was in a, what was that Jack Reacher movie, though?

[2911] That one was.

[2912] That was a turd?

[2913] Right.

[2914] You're making another one else?

[2915] No, I think it might have been John Wick.

[2916] They're doing a third one.

[2917] Of course, they're doing it, John Wick.

[2918] Yeah.

[2919] Yeah, he was, that killed die repeat he was in was an awesome movie.

[2920] I think they changed the name of it.

[2921] I don't think that's what it was originally called, but, you know, he has to keep redoing the scene.

[2922] He goes back, and then he ends up, like, killing everyone and saves the day or whatever.

[2923] Wasn't that an Adam Sandler movie?

[2924] That movie, the day after tomorrow.

[2925] Oh, right.

[2926] Wasn't that?

[2927] They changed the names, so I don't remember.

[2928] It used to be called Kill Die Repeat?

[2929] Edge of Tomorrow.

[2930] Edge of Tomorrow.

[2931] That's right.

[2932] That movie was fucking badass.

[2933] That was a really good, really good science fiction movie.

[2934] But it was one of the ones that came out.

[2935] What year did it come out?

[2936] 2014.

[2937] 2014 was just a few years removed from him being wacky.

[2938] when he did that Matt Lauer interview on the Today Show where it was like, you're being glib, Matt.

[2939] You're being glib.

[2940] When he's talking about Brooke Shields taking psychiatric medication.

[2941] You understand this?

[2942] I understand this.

[2943] Yeah.

[2944] Scientology is highly critical of psychiatric meditation.

[2945] Yeah.

[2946] They prefer you stay crazy.

[2947] You don't know what you're talking about, Matt.

[2948] Have you done the research?

[2949] I've done the research.

[2950] Yeah.

[2951] You're glib, Matt.

[2952] You're glib, but Lauer didn't handle it that good either.

[2953] Now.

[2954] You're supposed to go, well, explain to me the mechanism.

[2955] of what's happening with these psychiatric drugs and what do you pose?

[2956] And why do you think that you understand the biological makeup of all these different human beings and that none of them should be taking psychiatric medication?

[2957] That's a crazy thing to say that you're smarter than all these biologists and medical scientists and all these people that have concocted these SSRIs and different...

[2958] Have you done the research?

[2959] Have you done the research?

[2960] Are you glib?

[2961] They're making Top Gun 2 right now.

[2962] Fuck.

[2963] Do ever tell you the first time I did Letterman when Cruz was on it?

[2964] Did I ever tell you that story?

[2965] No. I was trying to do my first letterman.

[2966] I'm super nervous and I'm just trying to tell myself, you know, just like any other show.

[2967] It's just like any other show.

[2968] You know, Tom Cruise, it's his first time he's on the show in like 10 years, 15 years, and he's on.

[2969] And I'm watching through the monitor.

[2970] He's running up and down the theater.

[2971] The theater, like saying hi to people during the break.

[2972] No. Yeah, he's like, hey, and he's like running up and down and having this great time.

[2973] I'm like, it's just another show.

[2974] it'll be okay and then they bring you downstairs and you're standing outside this door like to go onto the stage and he says good night during the show and he the door swings open and a very sweaty tom cruise is like nose to nose with me and he's like you're next and he hugs me he's like woo it's great out there and then goes bouncing up the stairs and I'm like what's going to happen to me out there this is terrifying he totally took all of my coolness and just chew oh a strange guy yeah but the energy just he was like an electric eel and i'm just like it's all right i can get through this be such a strange strange guy yeah when he gets into that like i'm laughing thing is just gets weird oh my god i know well it's oh god funny now no it wasn't such a high altitude that it would have you know sure I'm standing in the wings right now.

[2975] What are you thinking?

[2976] What am I going to say first?

[2977] Yeah.

[2978] What do you think with those things?

[2979] Those things are such a little weird sprint.

[2980] How's my tie?

[2981] How's my tie?

[2982] What's my first line?

[2983] What am I going to say?

[2984] Do I go out casual?

[2985] Yeah, I can't.

[2986] There's a heated interview from Matt Lauer.

[2987] Play that.

[2988] It's right there.

[2989] It's coming up next.

[2990] Here it is.

[2991] Here's Matt.

[2992] Matt had a full of the hair back there.

[2993] Oh, yeah.

[2994] Look at that.

[2995] He's got all that hair.

[2996] 2014.

[2997] Look at them handsome bastard.

[2998] Yeah.

[2999] Dumm -Dum -Dum -Dum.

[3000] This is not just an alien movie.

[3001] The story breaks down on a lot of different levels.

[3002] They look pissed at each other already.

[3003] Yeah.

[3004] Not the best father in the world.

[3005] When we were working on the story, originally three years ago, Steve and I came up with this idea of making it about a family.

[3006] It's okay.

[3007] That was a good movie.

[3008] I had loved that movie.

[3009] Yeah, me too.

[3010] Want to go inside.

[3011] Of course you do it.

[3012] That real sense of, like, where are we going to go?

[3013] Well, that's what I think it would probably be like if we did get invaded, too.

[3014] There'd be robots like that.

[3015] Yeah.

[3016] That'll be cool.

[3017] Here.

[3018] Play some of that.

[3019] Before I was a Scientologist, I never agreed with psychiatry.

[3020] And then when I started studying the history of psychiatry, I started realizing more and more why I didn't agree with psychiatry.

[3021] And as far as the Brooks Shields thing is, look, you know, I understand.

[3022] I really care about Brooks Shields.

[3023] Why?

[3024] a wonderful and talented woman.

[3025] And I want to see her do well.

[3026] And I know that psychiatry is a pseudoscience.

[3027] But Tom, if she said that this particular thing helped her feel better, whether it was the antidepressant or going to a counselor or a psychiatrist, isn't that enough?

[3028] You have to understand this.

[3029] Here we are today where I talk out again.

[3030] drugs and psychiatric abuses of electric shocking people, against their will, of drugging children with them not knowing the effects of these drugs.

[3031] Do you know what Adderall is?

[3032] Do you know Ridland?

[3033] Do you know now that Ridland is a street drug?

[3034] Do you understand that?

[3035] The difference is this was not against her will, but this wasn't against Brooks' will.

[3036] I understand there's abuse of all of these things.

[3037] No, you see, here's the problem.

[3038] You don't know the history of psychiatry.

[3039] I do.

[3040] Aren't there examples and might not book shields be an example of someone who benefited from one of those drugs?

[3041] All it does is mask the problem, Matt.

[3042] And if you understand the history of it, it masks the problem.

[3043] That's what it does.

[3044] He is pretty aggressive on Lauer.

[3045] Yeah.

[3046] You're not getting to the reason why.

[3047] Lauer wasn't being shitty.

[3048] He's just like, yeah.

[3049] He's just like intense.

[3050] Meanwhile, he's right about a lot of it.

[3051] He's definitely right about Adderall and Ritalin that some people abuse it.

[3052] But abuse, just because someone abuses it doesn't.

[3053] mean it doesn't have uses you know it doesn't I don't I don't I've met people that are on Adderall and they say they need it I don't know if they're right yeah but the guy who developed Adderall says that it should be uh for about four percent of the population that's a lot like four people out and it's a room full 100 people four of them cranked out and doctors are cranking it out like 30 percent like the patients they see yeah it's like super high the guy who made it said it's being abused uh well I'm sure it is.

[3054] And amongst journalists.

[3055] Have you done the research, Joe?

[3056] Have you done the research?

[3057] Well, I know a lot about talking about it.

[3058] I understand.

[3059] I understand it.

[3060] I understand psychiatry.

[3061] But he's right about little kids and riddlin.

[3062] And I had a neighbor.

[3063] They drug their kid up with the fucking riddle in.

[3064] It was weird.

[3065] There's nothing wrong with the kid.

[3066] He just had energy.

[3067] And the parents were working all the time.

[3068] They just didn't want to deal with it.

[3069] They put the kid on riddlin.

[3070] It's terrible.

[3071] They were bad parents.

[3072] That's terrible.

[3073] I was watching it happen.

[3074] I was like, whoa.

[3075] And then they zoned the kid out.

[3076] They got him on some shit.

[3077] And he was just like.

[3078] like a weird little zombie kid after that oh man say hi to him he's like hi oh my god that's terrible he could have been an artist could have been something great right that's the thing you take it away from him you put a kid in a classroom and you make them listen to boring shit all day yeah they don't want to do it you think well there's something wrong with this child yeah right no he's kind of actually a free thinker he's actually gonna do something really cool yeah he's got energy let him figure it out do something great he's bouncing off the walls yeah let him go outside yeah because he's not into a robot like the rest of the class.

[3079] But that's what we need.

[3080] We need robots.

[3081] We need workers.

[3082] Well, we can do with the 3D printers.

[3083] We can make them.

[3084] Totally.

[3085] With human skin around the outsides.

[3086] They're going to ship the 3D printers to Mars and have them make all the stuff we need on Mars right there.

[3087] You don't have to ship it.

[3088] Do you think in our lifetime someone's going to fly to Mars and live there?

[3089] Yes, you're looking at him.

[3090] I've already told my family.

[3091] I might not come back, but I'm going to be a pioneer.

[3092] won't come back.

[3093] If you go there, you're not coming back.

[3094] I know.

[3095] I'll die on Mars.

[3096] Pretty cool.

[3097] No, you won't be able to do sets up there.

[3098] Yeah, I will, because by then, comedy is going to be all hologram.

[3099] So you'll be able to, like, beam you into a room?

[3100] Yeah, it'll be me at the comedy store doing a late -night set, but I'll be on Mars.

[3101] Is that good enough?

[3102] Is that good enough?

[3103] No, you don't, for us, we won't feel it.

[3104] It's analog.

[3105] You won't feel it.

[3106] It's an analog experience.

[3107] Yeah, there's no energy transfer.

[3108] Uh -uh.

[3109] Yet.

[3110] think someday yeah they're going to harness your energy it'll be that good do you think you'd be able to bang people who aren't there yeah I'm gonna make them with my 3D printer with human cells and then bang them we're setting up this is why I made you we're just to bang you well well that's that's an interesting question right there's people that are they're considering the ethical implications of making a headless person that you would harvest your organs for for like say if tom papa decides i'm going to make a headless tom papa right and uh i'm just going to drink like a fish and scoop the fucking liver out of this asshole and stick it into my body yeah it's pretty cool it is all it's great yeah if your grandpa needs a liver and you want to keep grandpa alive harness all those parts yeah but what are the what's the ethical considerations someone just told me that there's if you need a part if you need an organ or something uh you go to the states that have no helmet laws.

[3111] Oh, Jesus.

[3112] How crazy is that?

[3113] I was just in Chicago.

[3114] Chicago doesn't have helmet laws.

[3115] Oh, really?

[3116] Dude, watching these people ride in the highway.

[3117] But you know what?

[3118] I came home, and then in Chicago, they don't have helmet laws, but they can't split lanes.

[3119] Right.

[3120] And then I came home, and these fucking guys are just driving right next to cars and whizzing in between lanes.

[3121] And I'm like, what's more dangerous?

[3122] Is splitting lanes more dangerous?

[3123] Or is it riding around with no helmet?

[3124] I don't know.

[3125] Scary, though.

[3126] Both of them.

[3127] Have you ever read in a motorcycle?

[3128] Yeah, for years.

[3129] Did you?

[3130] For like 15 years, yeah.

[3131] Look at you.

[3132] Until my kids were born.

[3133] Yeah, I went around the whole country on my bike.

[3134] Really?

[3135] My wife and I on the back for five weeks.

[3136] Wow.

[3137] Oh, did we talk about this in the podcast?

[3138] I think so.

[3139] I must have.

[3140] It's one of my big stories.

[3141] Yeah.

[3142] I remember you saying that.

[3143] I miss it.

[3144] I do miss it.

[3145] I mean, like I see bike.

[3146] I've been looking at it more.

[3147] Would you?

[3148] Would if?

[3149] You had, like, say if you had a summer house, like in Big Bear or something like that.

[3150] Eremaine?

[3151] Nobody up there.

[3152] You just drive around.

[3153] Get a nice bike up there.

[3154] I would do that.

[3155] I would do that.

[3156] I got to get a house.

[3157] Freedom.

[3158] I love it.

[3159] You're so focused because you don't want to die.

[3160] It's one of those things that you're just so focused on.

[3161] You forget about the whole rest of the world.

[3162] Locked in.

[3163] Oh, it's so nice.

[3164] It does sound good.

[3165] I know.

[3166] I've been looking at bikes lately.

[3167] But you see people that get fucked up by bikes.

[3168] It's not good.

[3169] No, especially here.

[3170] I know you don't listen to the radio.

[3171] But if you do out here, you hear about radio motorcycle accidents like every day.

[3172] On the news, radio news?

[3173] Yeah, like, oh, there's traffic on the five.

[3174] There was a motorcycle accident.

[3175] It's like there's a lot.

[3176] I know.

[3177] Because it's music.

[3178] That's what you listen to on the radio?

[3179] Well, they break in once in a while and say there's an accident or something.

[3180] If I'm not listening to Sirius XM or podcasts or.

[3181] Do you listen to Sirius?

[3182] Chris?

[3183] What do you listen to?

[3184] Sometimes I listen to comedians.

[3185] Sometimes I listen to the news.

[3186] I have a Sinatra station, a Coltrane station.

[3187] Yeah.

[3188] You know, I'm a hip dad.

[3189] Yeah.

[3190] Do you think your kids think you're a hip dad?

[3191] No. No. I humiliate my children.

[3192] Yeah, totally.

[3193] It's just how it's always going to be.

[3194] Which is cool.

[3195] They like that.

[3196] They like knowing that the dork is there and he loves them.

[3197] Yeah, that's the whole key.

[3198] You're stupid.

[3199] Don't you love making your kids laugh?

[3200] Oh, yeah.

[3201] Oh, it's the best.

[3202] It's fun.

[3203] A lot of dads can't make their kids laugh.

[3204] Really?

[3205] Yes.

[3206] They can make them laugh in a goofy way, but when you can make them laugh in a way that you know is really funny.

[3207] Right.

[3208] That's like, you know.

[3209] My youngest is funny.

[3210] My youngest is fucking funny.

[3211] She's hilarious.

[3212] Yeah.

[3213] She's really into it, too.

[3214] She's really into saying funny shit.

[3215] She's got good timing.

[3216] It's good.

[3217] It's funny.

[3218] My little one's the same way.

[3219] Yeah, well, they realize that's how they get attention.

[3220] Yeah.

[3221] They're wise asses.

[3222] Yeah, you say something, they say something funny, everybody laughs, and they're like, whoa, that felt good.

[3223] Yeah.

[3224] Gives them a little charge.

[3225] And what's funny, too, is probably the same thing that mine has, is that they're not doing it for you.

[3226] They're doing it purely for them.

[3227] Oh, yeah.

[3228] To mock you.

[3229] They victimize you.

[3230] Yeah, you're old.

[3231] To mock you.

[3232] What's it like being old?

[3233] Mock you on the ground.

[3234] Mock you.

[3235] They love to mock the fact that I'm bald.

[3236] Yeah, I know.

[3237] It's hilarious.

[3238] They mock that I can't see I need glasses, yeah Cute, daddy's dying, ha ha Daddy's eyes are fading Fucking loser Watching me use a cell phone And not be able to navigate Just, Dad, just give it to me Oh, they know how to use electronics In a weird way Oh, instinctual Take to it Like they know how to edit videos And shit like them Like how do you know how to do that Like they don't even have a phone They're like using my wife's phone They're making videos How the fuck did you know how to do that There's a little video editor programs and shit.

[3239] Because I have a young brain, I can learn things very quickly.

[3240] Very quick.

[3241] My eyesight is killer.

[3242] I can learn things quickly.

[3243] The eyesight killer is a big deal, but I think it's a, the brain is so plastic.

[3244] Yeah.

[3245] The mental plasticity is just, they just, they figure it, oh, yeah, you swipe right, oh, you do that, and then you highlight that and you spread this out and you touch that and you edit.

[3246] You don't want that?

[3247] You want to filter, so you go down the bottom.

[3248] My kids were with my wife at a party at relatives when I got home yesterday.

[3249] They weren't there.

[3250] face time with my daughter I said how's mom doing and she was bored at the party and she's like how's mom I said how's mom doing at the party she's she's doing okay she's inside she's heard to repeat a couple stories a couple times but she seems to be having fun yeah yeah that's hilarious yeah they're all over us and one day they'll be us yeah it's great they'll be their version of us yeah raising their own kid going what the fuck i've got kids now and you'll be like with this new baby that they made i'm like hey kids cute here take them yeah going fishing i don't got responsibilities anymore yeah let me have a little kiss let me get some sugar from that baby cheek now i'm out bye good luck change the diapers yeah can i babysit friday friday night no no that's for you i'm working do you think you'll be working to the bitter end to the end yeah there's no part when i hear people say that they're going to retire like anybody just in the world say i hear retirement right i know that's one thing i'm not doing right there's no why why would you retire i want to make stuff until i go i want to put out stuff and see what that stuff will be later on who knows well it's also you've chosen a path that it's just perfect for you yeah you you actually you're not working because you have to go to work you're working because you enjoy what you do right which is really what I encourage everyone to try to attempt to do.

[3251] This thing that we're taught in school to try to find a good job that pays well.

[3252] That's wonderful advice.

[3253] But it's not the best advice.

[3254] The best advice is try to find the thing that you love to do.

[3255] Because if you can do that, then you never have that feeling that most people have when it comes to work.

[3256] Most people have that feeling like, oh, I've got to go to work.

[3257] Right.

[3258] You never have that.

[3259] Never.

[3260] but that's also I think there's some luck involved in that for sure you know but there's also decisions yeah you make if you don't have that luck to try to make that luck happen yeah you know and then there's also talent there's also like some people want to be a comedian and they really would never will be yeah just can't I think being self -aware of what you really really want to do as the person not thinking of it even in terms of work just but being looking at yourself enough to know what you're good at and what you enjoy.

[3261] Right.

[3262] And then follow that path, whether it makes a business sense or not.

[3263] That's the best thing you can do.

[3264] Yeah.

[3265] You don't know where it's going to leave it.

[3266] But at least you're heading in the direction where it's stuff you like and it's stuff you know you have an aptitude for.

[3267] So wherever you end up in that area will be pretty close to happiness, you know.

[3268] Words of Wisdom from Tom Papa, author of Your Dad Stole My Rake.

[3269] now.

[3270] Is it an audio version?

[3271] There's an audio version too.

[3272] Did you use your voice to do the audio version?

[3273] Nine hours, nine hours in a booth.

[3274] Thank God you did, though.

[3275] I read a lot of books on tape or I have a lot of books written, read to me on tape.

[3276] The real problem is when you know that it's not the author and you hear someone have some sort of bullshit, half -ass connection to the words they're saying.

[3277] No, I know.

[3278] It's not good.

[3279] That's why it was hard to do, actually, because it's nine hours of reading.

[3280] You've got to read a whole book.

[3281] But also, I have to be me behind it.

[3282] They don't want me doing a phone inversion.

[3283] How many hours at a time did you do these sessions?

[3284] I broke it into two.

[3285] It's like four and a half each day.

[3286] It's hard.

[3287] It's hard to stay on point for that long.

[3288] It was a thing.

[3289] Like when you get out of there.

[3290] But also, you know, when you go in those booths, like even in this show, like time's different here.

[3291] Yeah.

[3292] It's different here than three hours somewhere else.

[3293] Three hours is up.

[3294] We did three hours.

[3295] See?

[3296] See?

[3297] There you go.

[3298] Exactly.

[3299] It's different.

[3300] There's something going on with the timing.

[3301] You're engaged.

[3302] It's not like three hours out in the world.

[3303] Yeah.

[3304] It's a little time warp.

[3305] Yeah.

[3306] It's a total time warp.

[3307] yeah it's uh whenever whenever i say i'm doing the show is people it's like three hours i'm like that's not a thing it's not yeah well it's not a thing with you and i you're just doing the show believe me it's a thing with some people some people you just squeezing blood out of a rock jesus no i could do this for four hours easy easy easy easy easy easy well thanks joe you're a beautiful man you too man i'm sure your book's hilarious although i haven't read it it's a great father's day gift For you, I'm giving it to you.

[3308] Thank you.

[3309] Because you don't get gifts from your family.

[3310] Tom Papa, ladies and gentlemen.

[3311] See you.

[3312] Woo!

[3313] We did it.